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vitaminseetarot · 7 months ago

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Pick a Card: Your Next Upcoming Transformation 🌕🦋

Hey y'all, welcome back for another pac reading for our last supermoon of the year. This full moon is in Taurus, so we are encouraged to step back and focus on resting and self care in between these tumultuous and difficult energies we are currently running through. Every late autumn season invites us to explore how we have transformed over the year and how we are still evolving. This Scorpio season in particular has been very emboldened and expressive as I've seen its presence in everything from neighborhood construction to politics. And while I will avoid making this post too charged, I will use this post as a reminder that I support all marginalized communities who are feeling confused and vulnerable at this time. I hope you find this blog to be a safe space.

Butterfly imagery has been surrounding me, and I was even gifted some butterfly magnets this season. Butterflies represent the soul and its deep transformative abilities. As we release the old, we may be able to spread our wings to be magnets for better times ahead. So I've created six piles to show where and how this process is shifting you to your next chapter.

1. Pink Butterfly - Little Princess 2. Red Butterfly - Inferno 3. Yellow Butterfly - Spirited Yellow 4. Green Butterfly - Willow Hedge 5. Blue Butterfly - Sea of Tranquility 6. Purple Butterfly - Joie de vivre

Pile 1: Pink Butterfly - Little Princess

6 of Pentacles, Queen of Cups; Appreciation, Marquise, Wolf, Grandmother Moonstone "Forgive, not because they deserve it, but because you deserve peace."

Good evening, pile 1. Your next chapter involves balancing your needs with the needs of others. Perhaps for a while, you have been on one end of an extreme when it came to exchanging. You may feel as though you give too much without receiving the equivalent in return, and this realization means that your generous energy is wearing down on you. It could also be the other way around, where you could feel guilty when others give you things because you're not sure how you will be able to return the favor. It may feel easier to lean on oneself than to grapple with paying back such a gift, as you wouldn't want the other person to feel tired too. I'm feeling many hang ups on both ends when it comes to generosity, and this energy may be arising due to the holiday season getting closer. With the Marquise card showing the Libra symbol above the 6 of Pentacles, balance is the emphasis here. Balance is not always an exact 50/50 at the time of exchange. Cycles will come where you may rely on the help of others more, followed by phases where those same people will come to need and appreciate your help. This is balance in a higher order sense, in terms of your lifetime and not just one season.

It could have been that, in childhood, you were given strange attitudes and beliefs on giving and receiving. I'm getting a weird reaction from seeing "Little Princess". Some part of you may want to embody the princess archetype, who lives in abundance and receives adoration. But maybe there were people who used it with a more negative connotation, like saying "bratty princess" or "spoiled rotten princess". This could have been from family, friends, or even ideas picked up from TV. It could have been that others act like they're spoiling you or really going out of their way when they give you or help you with something. It's such a sticky back and forth, and in time it becomes harder to receive or be grateful from such a source of negativity. And now you've been getting this intuitive nudge that healthier beliefs need to be created.

This season is about observing these negative beliefs and reclaiming your feelings of gratitude and generosity, in a sense. Gratitude isn't about settling for bad standards; if you get a bad gift or a good gift out of somebody "spoiling" you, it's not a reflection of who you are but of where they're at in their own journey. If they don't seem grateful for what you do, that's also a part of their own process. Some people won't be able to reciprocate, just as there are times where others will give more than you can give back. You can embody a healthy princess archetype by allowing yourself to receive without guilt, and letting yourself give without exhausting yourself. People above all like to know they're being appreciated, even if the gift isn't perfect, which means you're off the pressure from finding that perfect thing too. It's ultimately the thought that counts, so whatever you give or get, release the burden and enjoy the gift swapping. If you feel others don't appreciate what you do, please understand it's part of their own life to deal with and please give yourself that gift of self-appreciation.

Pile 2: Red Butterfly - Inferno

XXIII Prism, XI Justice; Future, Tear, Lion, Anandalite and Lemon Balm "Try. Make mistakes! Try again. Perfection does not exist."

Good evening, pile 2. You're transforming into a time of life that's filled to the brim with creative passion. There is an overflow of fiery hot emotion in this group, see how the volcano plumes from the lion's head. You may be getting a lot of ideas at this time for what to make next, some of you could be working on a project now but I'm also getting that many haven't started yet and only will when the grand idea comes through. There are two ways I'm interpreting these projects. They could be artistic or writing projects, but it could also refer to the creation process of forming and completing new goals. This group could benefit greatly from making vision boards, especially for what you want to see or do for next year. Interesting enough, this tarot deck has two additional cards and you got one of them, the Prism, which I interpret to mean "everything". This card sits below the Tear card with the Gemini symbol, so you may also benefit from using a notepad to write ideas down as you get them on the fly. I'm hearing that the ideas that make you feel the most will be the most potent when made physical, you are being asked to work closely with your emotions as a creative compass.

Your cards are bright and hot, but must be tempered with cool confidence. You are stepping into a fresh role where you can imagine your visions easily coming to life. I don't have the Moonology deck in this reading but I'm reminded of the Leo card where it says "confidence is your key to success" because it's such a strong affirmation. Your task is to be your own cheerleader to keep the energy and momentum brimming alive. Cause that's the thing about fire: it will eventually burn out if it's not attended to. Cool casual confidence is a firewood coated in fat, it's what starts the fire and keeps it going long. Not every idea will be the great one, but it's important to put down anything that comes to mind. There will always be time, with the Justice card, for sorting and deciding what works and what doesn't later on. You know how you don't edit a story chapter by chapter, but only after the full draft is complete? This goes for anything you work on, even for future plans.

It doesn't seem like it now, but you are moving into a time where you will have the spark and the passion to move your vision forward. Making excited plans about what you will do or make next will put you in a better mindset for starting them. If you're looking at these cards thinking "passion? motivation? I've never felt so depleted, how could this be true?" then perhaps you're now in a space where sitting with your heavier feelings with grace and integrating them needs to be prioritized beforehand. Part of this transformation process into living in a more impassioned state requires small steps. Intuitive freewriting in a journal may help to break up darker feelings into something more manageable, or you may find another healthy creative outlet for dealing with difficult times currently. But if you've been convincing yourself that you can't create because you're in a bad mood, you may in the process of shifting around your perspective so that creating becomes a means to work through the bad mood. Beautiful, incredible things could come from embracing artistic skills from every facet and angle.

Pile 3: Yellow Butterfly - Spirited Yellow

10 of Wands, VII Chariot Rx; Self Love, Brilliant, Unicorn, Golden Topaz and Yellow Rose "Better to regret the things you've done than to regret the things you didn't do."

Good evening, pile 3. Goodness, do I want to give this group a big pat on the back for all you do! Whatever you've been working at over the months, you have been pushing hard! So much so that the end result doesn't even feel all that great anymore; you're just happy for it to be finished so you can take a break. This pile may have a lot of tired students who will be finishing out their semester in the next few weeks and you're excited for the brief moment of rest. You are very bright and intelligent as well as hard working and I feel your transformation involves acknowledging your talents and strengths. Maybe things didn't end the way you hoped for them to, like getting an A- instead of an A+, but you can still congratulate yourself for the effort you put in anyway, because to do so would congratulate you for who you are. And I get that this pile has had to deal with some major disappointments, but sometimes things just don't work out the way we intend them to. Sometimes the teacher just puts down a random grade because they're tired, maybe there isn't a good reason why. It's not worth belittling your own abilities.

Unicorns indicate something spectacular and magical. To see one before you is to see what cannot be easily believed. Next to the abundance card is a sign of great things to come. The Earth symbol in the Brilliant card reminds me of the Wheel of Fortune. At this time, things may feel "cursed" or futile, but a big spin of the wheel is due to come during your next evolution which may propel you to a different octave of luck. And it may not even be luck but rather the positive karma from the work you've done now. Trust that your good intentions and efforts will be reflected back to you when the stars align, but now is a time to pat yourself on the back and give yourself the recognition you need. The Morbid Mirror says "better to regret" but I wouldn't even say that. You don't need to spend any more time regretting the wrong choice on the quiz or that you answered a question awkwardly in a job interview. What's done is done and you don't need to beat yourself up for what didn't work out.

Forgive yourself for not meeting every goal perfectly, and forgive yourself if your energy to keep pushing is waning. This may be a time where you need to focus more on cheering yourself up and resting than trying to figure out what went wrong or how to make it right. Remind yourself of all the times where things have worked out before and affirm your own brilliance. Don't let the silence of today make you think that you don't deserve good things for what you give. Have faith your efforts will be met with great reward down the road. For now, your catalyst to transform involves making peace with yourself and creating opportunities to be happy. Enjoy the little things that raise your spirits up, and take pride in what you've accomplished so far no matter what.

Pile 4: Green Butterfly - Willow Hedge

6 of Swords, I Magician; Self Esteem, Sunflower, Swallow, Ethiopian Opal "The most damning lie you can tell is the lie you tell yourself."

Good evening, pile 4. Your next phase in life involving moving on from a rough chapter in your past. There could have been an event that scarred your sense of trust or elicited deep insecurities, like an audition but not getting the desired part, or a friend group wasn't what you thought it was. You'll be walking away from something that was toxic, whether it be a situation, group, person, or even from something within you like a limiting mindset that has tried corrode your self esteem. The Willow tree is traditionally a tree representing sorrow and loss, so at this time you may feel despondent and unsure of how things will change. But a hedge represents a boundary line between the known and unknown. Please remind yourself that things are meant to change, that from this difficult time a more prosperous time can later come, even if it's not clear now. The Swallow is a sign of hope and optimism showing you that you are meant to shift away into a better time. Do not let yourself get stuck in believing that the way things are is the way things will always be, as that will close doors faster than the wind. The only door you're meant to close is to the past that left you feeling hurt and torn. Soon, upon leaving the chrysalis, you will be able to open the doors to greater change.

The Magician makes full use of the here and now, using whatever they have at their disposal to see their goals through. Just because you don't see fresh flowers blooming doesn't mean the earth isn't ripe for new possibilities. Many plants can be seeded in the autumn that will blossom and grow fresh food in the spring and summer. There is more you can do with what you have now than you think. With the emphasis of wings in this pile, I'm getting that you're at the peak of something. You've risen up and overcome something difficult for which you don't give yourself enough credit. Only a vast horizon filled with potential lies before you, which you can do with however you please. You're not meant to forever stay frozen at the peak, reflecting on the toxicity you left behind, but to glide back down and start anew.

The Sunflower always faces the direction of the sun. So should you turn your attention to what in life makes you feel most good about being alive and being you. This is how you can move on, by making space for what you wish to grow. The Opal card speaks of children and birthing something into being, so however low you feel about yourself now, remember that we are all flying in our own altitudes and that there's always room to expand on yourself as a person. If you feel beat up because you didn't make it onto a sports team, place energy on creating the next opportunity to play at the game. Talk to yourself truthfully and fairly as if your child self is hearing everything because your inner child is the part of you who will help guide you through your transformation. Harness your courage to take the next step forward as in your next chapter you will be in perfect alignment to achieve whatever you wish.

Pile 5: Blue Butterfly - Sea of Tranquility

XV Devil, IX Hermit; Learning, Mazarin Rx, Hawk, Pixie Helpers and Green Aventurine "Just being born, makes you worthy of being here. Let yourself just be."

Good evening, pile 5. Your next transformation is a smooth and steady pace of growth. You're entering into a phase of life where you can exist and embrace the fullness of your life for how it is now, at its best. It's strange to put it like this, but with the Mazarin card in reverse it's almost as though your growth path doesn't actually involving growing in the traditional sense. So during this season you may experience a sense of regression or going backwards, and this is to brush up on old sticky lessons that need to be cleared out. I feel this lesson has to do with the fixation on self-improvement. This pile may be the type to put a lot of time into ameliorating your life and relationships. You could even be thinking about your New Year's resolution when we haven't even yet entered December at the time of this reading, just because you wanna get ahead on your to-do list planned out for next year. However, I'm seeing that your transformation will involve some pulling back and withdrawing your energies to highlight overlooked aspects.

We live in a culture of constant doing, and it makes sense that this feeling ramps up during the end of the year. There could be real engagements that require attention due to real deadlines, but sometimes our brains make up deadlines just for feeling like it makes sense to do so. The Hawk is vigilant, always keeping a sharp eye on every task and detail. For some things, you may have a lot more time than you believe you do in working something out. It's okay to occasionally sleep on something and come back to it. The Hawk also speaks about self-sabotage. Could you be putting unneeded frustration on yourself when maintaining a flexible outlook might help you reach your goals sooner? It's like if you're trying to write a song but you're not sure how to finish it: it make take less time to just put it aside and come back to it instead of straining at the same verse for hours on end.

If, during this regression, you feel lost at what to do, perhaps taking time to meditate or center your mind may be the best course of action, instead of spinning wheels to figure out the next thing. Life is not a neverending to-do list where we're meant to go from one thing to the next right away. Your transformation forward requires compassion for not being where you want to be in the present, but finding space to breathe anyway. Be more discerning with how you use your time and remember that free time isn't wasted time. It's okay if you feel stuck in a certain position, but it'll be easier to rise from that when you let yourself be and avoiding pushing too hard. Within that tranquil state, great ideas and solutions can come. We don't always need to chase for the next great problem to tackle to feel like we're making proper use of the present. There is purpose in the peace and silence of doing nothing. You will transform into somebody who understands the value of resting your thinking mind when it's needed.

Pile 6: Purple Butterfly - Joie de vivre

XIV Temperance, King of Cups; Retreat, Heart, Tiger, Laboradorite and Blue Lotus Flower "Everything is energy and energy never dies; it just transforms."

Good evening, pile 6. This pile is for the intuitive people out there! There is a lot of psychic energy in this group. Your transformation is on an almost imperceptible level, too subtle for those who are not as spiritually inclined. This could involve some kind of moment of awakening or enlightenment, but it may not necessarily be a dramatic one. You are stepping into a more mature and balanced disposition, not the kind of awakening where we suddenly get clued into to the basics of souls and spirit guides, but one that involves a shift on how you view the world as a whole. Joie de vivre means "joy of living" in French, and it refers to having a cheerful and optimistic outlook on life. You may have been working on the heavier aspects of spirituality, like doing shadow work, getting used to the idea that it's how all spirituality functions. But I'm getting a brighter view of seeing things here, realizing that nothing stays the same so that the good can come along with the bad. You'll be shifting into a spirituality that satisfies you with a sense of hope, love, joy, and community.

The Tiger represents opulence, so you may receive an abundance of psychic energy and information during your shift. This could come as automatic intuitive knowing (clairsentience), or through vivid meaningful dreams that provide deeper revelations about people and self. The Temperance card shows that this revelation is not one of fireworks but of a more intrinsic lasting sense of contentment. These are downloads meant to help you see that while spirituality isn't all sunshine and rainbows, it's also not all doom and gloom either. You may be retreating from doing the big bold kind of karmic work over this transformation period, which is okay as there is always a time for doing and not doing, and I really feel with your maturity that you've already done a lot. Now it's time to pull back from the shadow work so to find balance in between the lessons.

The secret to this transformation is non-attachment. Let the events and moments in your day come as they may. You will soon get the sense in your spirit that there is a constant inner joy that doesn't respond to external circumstances even if they're intrusive or annoying. With the unconditional compassion of Pisces, you find that bad situations that come up do not tend to last long when your heart is directing itself towards what you feel love and gratitude for, you won't be able to as easily dwell on the worst parts of the day over the best. And with less dwelling on negative parts of the past means less need to heal those parts. If something falls away, another thing will come to fill the gap. Your regenerative abilities are potent for this next phase of your life. I'm talking like this unshakeable faith in the best outcomes while feeling fine with things even when the outcome is far from ideal. This transformation is a form of wisdom that heals and will continue to heal as you gracefully move forward. Some may mention that you have an aura glow around you, which is your transformation at work.

This reading has not been evaluated by the FDA to diagnose, prevent, treat, or cure any disease or infection. Please ask your physician before going online.

2024, @VitaminseeTarot ™

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earthytzipi · 6 months ago

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I actually loved the writing of caitvi this season for a few reasons:

1. I was very fortunate to meet and consistently date my lovely wife. Having observed other adult lesbians... that shit is MESSY. It's so so so so so common for lesbians to date, break up, date again, break up again, accuse each other of abuse or of being toxic, then date again, break up another time, date another person in the friend group, and so on and so forth. This season felt very honest to me in that way. If everything had been smooth sailing for Caitlyn and Vi, I don't think I would have bought it, especially with all the conflict they set up in s1. I agree that Caitlyn is toxic to Vi in Act 1. I just also don't think that's a deal-breaker for an adult relationship as long as amends are made, and I think that Cait's decision to let Vi release Jinx is a HUGE way that she made amends. I don't think she needed to grovel (nor would that have fit her character)- it demonstrated SO much character growth for her and so much trust in, and love for, Vi.

2. I've seen a lot of displeasure with Vi's writing this season, mostly centered around Vi's loss of agency and relative passivity. Everyone is entitled to their opinion, so, you know, grain of salt. It's just that, in my experience with trauma, you hit a breaking point where nothing matters to you anymore. You can't be resilient anymore. You've lost everything and you're grieving literally everything about the life you thought you had. (For the record, my trauma didn't even involve anyone dying, just abusive friendships, people cutting me off, and conversion therapy, and I *still* got there in my early 20s.) Vi shows a remarkable ability to push forward for Powder in s1, but by the first episode of s2, her resiliency is already breaking down. To me, it made complete sense that she showed more and more passivity and alcoholism as the season went on.

I think there's a misconception that trauma causes people to become strong. That is NOT what it does. It builds these insidious negative pathways of thought in your mind that wear you down over time. Eventually, it's too much. You can't take anything in stride. Everything becomes part of this pattern of hurt.

I think Jinx firing that missile was the breaking point for Vi. She lost her parents, she lost Vander, she lost her formative teenage years to prison, and the only reason she was still going at all was for Powder. That moment is the moment she decided Powder was gone, too. Imagine the grief of losing the last person you thought you had from your old life and not even being able to share that, because that person just killed a lot of people. In that light, the decision to join with the person who still cares about her and has been there for her makes sense, even though she hates the enforcers. I think that decision causes her a lot of pain and self-hatred which is reinforced when Cait leaves her, pushing her into the absolute pit of her trauma. Then all the events at the commune happen. Throughout the season she gains and loses hope about Jinx again and again, but when she's in that prison cell, from her point of view, she's just lost Jinx all over again after finally having her back for a while, and now Caitlyn, who she loves, for good.

In the end, when Cait says she engineered the whole thing to let Jinx escape? She gives Vi hope again in that moment. If Jinx isn't tried, she's still out there and Vi can still find her and try again. If Cait knew she would let Jinx escape and still be there for her, Cait still loves her more than she cares about revenge. Given how Cait almost killed a child to get to Jinx before, I think for Vi, this represents almost a complete 180 and demonstrates that Cait is sorry. I think their actions in that moment make perfect sense.

Anyways! To me, while I think s2 was definitely rushed as hell and had some other pacing issues, I loved the storyline for Cait and Vi.

#vi arcane #caitlyn kiramman #arcane #arcane spoilers #caitvi #lesbian #arcane analysis

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miraculouslbcnreactions · 3 months ago

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Hey! I’m the anon that had issues with the amok scene in werepapas that jumped the queue (thanks for that). I just wanted to clear up that I didn’t think Ladybug’s lack of reaction made her look bad. The point wasn’t to attack Marinette but more to attack whatever twist the crew are setting up as already failed.

I’m expecting a twist like “Lila stole the rings” or “Felix gave out copies” or “Adrien isn’t actually a sentimonster” and I am expecting the crew to pat themselves on the back for fooling the audience for 2+ seasons and point to scenes like this one to say “see it was all there if you paid attention”. But if that’s the case then attention should have been called to the lack of a feather. Without it, the audience can’t tell if they are doing yet another retcon on how amoks work or leaving breadcrumbs for a larger story.

(Ask in Question)

Got it and I agree completely. Every time a plot point like this comes up I like to point out that the show is aimed at ages 5 to 12. It's not supposed to be confusing and require careful study. Everything should be ridiculously obvious to even the most casual adult viewer because five-year-olds don't have anything like media literacy. The shows they watch are supposed to teach them how stories work at a basic level. Instead of doing that, Miraculous gives them utterly baffling things that grown adults have to rely on the word of god to understand and that's assuming that the word of god doesn't change because it's not technically canon. (And that's not even getting into this show's love of retconing canon.)

In this case, the word of god on the website formerly known as Twitter implies that those were indeed Adrien's rings, but the feather didn't come out because Marinette didn't want it to.

[Image description: a tweet from the head writer reading "Like for many matters in Miraculous' magic rules, intention does play a part, otherwise Gabriel would have been very foolish to akumatize Kagami via her ring the 1st time. But there's also another point.]

I don't like this concept, but it's not terrible in theory. It is terrible in the context of canon, though. We are in season six and this has literally never been established in a clear way. The evidence the given for this season six lore is a season two episode (Riposte) where Marinette didn't know that the akumatized person was a sentimonster so she wouldn't have had a reason to care about the feather one way or the other. Even worse, this episode is arguably contradicted in season five, the season most people are likely to think about when trying to figure out how the heck amoks work. (Also worth noting that five-year-olds and most other viewers don't have access to what was said on Twitter so they will just be left to guess at what happened here.)

In Riposte, Kagami is akumatized via her ring. When that ring is broken, she is fine. No feather is released. In the season five episode Perfection, she is once again akumatized via her ring, but this time it isn't broken. Instead, she frees herself. In spite of this, the episode takes the time to have her mother freak out about the akumatization as if the use of the ring was a big deal:

Tomoe: (slams her bokken right on Gabriel's hand on the monitor) You sent a megakuma into my daughter's ring!! (presses her bokken on Gabriel's cataclysmed hand) You endangered her!! Gabriel: Tsurugi-san... calm down. Tomoe: If you don't honor your contract, Gabriel, I will make your dream disappear, just like you tried to do with mine! Don't ever forget again... that you owe me everything!

Hey, writers, this was where you were supposed to establish how amoks work when they're used as akumas. Have Gabriel say that Kagami was perfectly safe because Ladybug didn't want to release the amok! Because you didn't have him say that, the audience is going to infer that Kagami was in real danger here because that is what this scene very clearly implies. I know having him say that means actually confirming Kagami's status and you're allergic to that, but I don't care! Shit or get off the pot!

Because Perfection comes after Riposte, any sane viewer will think that Riposte has been retconned or that the ring in Riposte wasn't her amok if they even remember that Riposte used her ring as her akuma which is a big if! I'll openly admit I didn't remember that until the Werepapas stuff happened and people started freaking out. I don't remember every akuma's civilian item! I doubt that most people do. If you'd asked me, I would have guessed that that Kagami's akuma was her fencing saber because I remembered that Riposte's sword breaking frees the akuma and the episode was all about fencing so the saber just makes sense.

There's also the issue of Representation which gave us this:

Félix: ...an order from his father was enough to trouble his feelings. Kagami: (as Colt, slamming her hand on a table...) Monster. Monster! MONSTER! (...and damaging the ring in the process, and Félix collapses on the floor) Félix: The child realized that his life was linked to that ring.

We learn that Félix's ring was superficially damaged and that the damage made him collapse into a lifeless doll, letting him realize that he was a sentimonster. We're going to ignore the fact that Adrien should have been granted a similar revelation in Werepapas and focus on the lore elements implied by Félix's story.

[Image description: Fèlix's ring with a crack on its surface. The crack is clearly shown to not go the entire way through the ring. The ring is intact and functional.]

Because the standard for the show is breaking akumas and amoks, the fact that Félix's ring wasn't broken feels important to the viewer. It is perfectly logical to see this and assume that Fèlix only survived because the damage was minor.

In fact, I'd argue that the most logic read of this scene is that breaking an amok releases the feather while merely damaging it just turns off the sentimonster. The implication is not that you can do the sort of thing that would release an amok without actually releasing an amok because akumas and amoks are usually (always?) released via breaking or destroying an object, not just mildly damaging it. The idea that mild damage is enough for a release has not been well established. I feel like it has to have happened before, but I can't think of an example and that's the issue. You need to clearly establish this stuff if you want your show to be comprehensible!

If the lesson of Félix's memory is supposed to be that you can break/damage an amok without releasing the feather, then Félix's memory should have shown the ring being truly broken without him melting away since canon usually breaks stuff. Or, at the very least, we could have had this episode's akuma defeated via superficial damage to contrast Félix's memory and subtly imply that superficial damage can have different consequences. That's not what we get, though. Nightormentor is defeated via a Cataclysm:

(Just as about Nightormentor was about to blow another pack of pink dust at the Resistance, Cat Noir jumps in and disintegrates Nightormentor's blow gun with his Cataclysm, bringing out the Megakuma and de-transforming the villain back to Gabriel. The Resistance cheer on their victory)

This is why the word of god explanation is so horrifically bad even though the concept could work in a show like Miraculous where the magic system has always included an element of intent. They had multiple chances to make the lore clear and they didn't take any of them so it doesn't matter if this was always the rule. There's simply no way for anyone to know this rule based on the actual text as shown by the fact that no one could figure this rule out until the writers told them even though there were hundreds of fans trying to understand this scene. That is embarrassingly bad writing and a massive disservice to the show's target audience who literally cannot have Twitter accounts because you need to be at least thirteen to make one and the official target age range for the show is 5 to 12!!!

Please note that while I said this lore could work, I still think it's dumb. Does this mean that you can completly destroy an amok and the sentimonster will still survive if you don't want the feather released? What if Ladybug isn't around to fix things? You can't even mercy kill the Senti since they're immune to cataclysms! Poor thing is just stuck there forever, a broken toy you can't fix much like the lore for this increasingly nonsense show. And while we're on the topic, how the hell was Fèlix's ring fixed after Colt damaged it? Ladybug wasn't around to do that. Do amoks self heal over time? Someone, please, make it make sense!

#ml writing critical #ml writing salt #anon ask #werepapas salt #lore discussion #senti salt

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octoberautumnbox · 7 months ago

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Happy Anni-box-sary!! :DDDD

Whew! It's been a year since I've started writing on this platform (and in general fsgsdjkfghjadskfh), and what a wild ride it has been. Ups and downs scattered throughout the year, but I really wouldn't have it any other way :uwuge:

All that said, let's move onto the box 2024 recap!

Yuri fics I've written: 8

Fly in the Night Trip

Love in the Night Train

Juicy Juicy

Friday

Adrenaline

Enjoy

I Got All I Need

Like It Like I Love It

buncha drabbles I didnt count, some of them fluff, some of them angst, all of them box 📦‼

Yuri fics other people have written: 6

@fillinforlater's Friends that can Keep a Secret

@birchleavesdawn's Bitter Taste

@xshadowdelta's Former Manager pt. 1: Back in Town

@usedpidemo's Cruel Flower

@prael's Reality

@leafostuff's Operant Conditioning

Non-Yuri fics I've written: 11

in my best attempt not to double count when there was more than one idol in the fic (lmao),

1 for soloist Chaeyeon

1 for Kiss of Life

2 for woo!ah!

2 for tripleS

2 for Kep1er

3 for fromis_9

Funnest fics to write:

Hell Week: despite not doing sins's prompt justice, I really did enjoy how I built Yubin and OC's character, even as the writer i fell in love with how sweet Yubin came to be, and while I do think the sex could have been fluffier, i do like how i wrote the ending :DDD

Cute and Caring Noona from Apartment 424: i think deep down inside i knew the apartment thing was gonna come back, even at the time, though i had to promise myself it wouldn't be a series. Yujin and Xiaoting are still a killer duo i'd love to write but it wouldn't fit that well with what i've decided on what the apartment fics will be, instead i'm going with the direction that The Sultry and Pervy Soda in Apartment 307 went and go from there

Like It Like I Love It: EASILY my top 1 from this year. it was everything reader box would have wanted in a yuri fic: a casual relationship, a possibility that there's something more in it, hot sex (literally), and just the right amount (maybe a bit too little) of showing off babygirl yul. i really hope this isn't peak box but going back to why i started writing in the first place, which is that i wanted to see more quality yuri fics, this was something that if i were still a reader would have sated me for at least another year. good job box!

Idols/Groups I've come to know:

Kiss of Life: I think they debuted before me? I noticed Natty first bc ofc I did 😭 but quickly fell in love with how Bobsky just vibes so well with them aaaaaaa

tripleS: I started paying attention around Girl's Capitalism but I knew of them since Generation. I still know only like ten of them and still need to look up whether they're of age or what number S they are but I've written the group thrice now so worth :DDDD

Kep1er: zozi was tough for wizones and I'm not exception, so there was a lot of animosity to this group starting out. I only really started loving this group because of choiyuj, and it was me falling in love with that tiktok that cookies n seggs noona was ever made and it's been upwards ever since

Collabs:

One Heck of a Joyride with @leafostuff: simultaneously this took way too long and not long enough LMAO we started in Feb and released in May, if u can remember Best Job Ever and Like It Like I Love It came out in May too so that was hectic for me. but it's my first and to date only long fic and I hope someday to surpass it in terms of word count and idol nuguness :sitt:

Prompts:

@i-am-lifeform24's Curated Companions: this first major prompt I took part in, where I wrote Dito Muna Tayo :nolookk: it got me attention I didnt know how to feel abt (I still don't tbh) but it was a major step in the right direction to temper my expectations of myself: it reminded me to write for me

@msafterhours's Seasons: this was a major L for me jfkgjslahhf I wrote A Little Goes a Long Way, misunderstanding the prompt "Seasons" for "Seasoning" and making a cooking fic instead. it was a great laugh with him tho, and a memory I come back to fondly

@mintwithchoco's Favorite Song: I wrote Orange-Tinted Sunset with Sticky in mind but promising mint I'd break Belle's heart lmao, at the time my current favorite song switched from that to Nothing and it all just fell in place. I had the idea a long time ago for Haneul but this was the perfect chance to broaden my horizons yet again, and to my dismay it proved @0cta9on right that I kinda was okay at all three genres of fics that touched on after all :bearlazy:

Growth:

can't remember if I said it out loud on the tl but im not a serious writer! that just means that I dont consciously aim to improve how I write and I'm totally fine with the skills and style I have now, and any exp gained or skills learned is has been passively achieved

that said, I'm really so so happy with Fly in the Night Trip and Love in the Night Train. In my first ever fic i said i wanted my next work to be a smut, and that i would be able to write more of what i wanted on my blog soon. Enjoy was both of those, and i even got to write so much more of my ult bias throughout the year and then some. you could call it self-serving, or as @capslocked so eloquently put it, unconsidered readers, all of you. :sitt:

thats why im really happy to be able to come full circle with another fluff in Love in the Night Train, because i feel like it concludes such an awesome year in such an awesome way. id tell 2023 box that just keeping at it wouldve worked out so well, but the extra effort to write just a tiny bit better, to listen to @midnightdancingsol's advice, to stick with it even though work fucked us up (and still does) is going to be well worth it

Hiatuses: 2

ok obviously im not as proud of this one. but each time i did, it was me reevaluating how I run the blog and what sort of stuff I'm getting myself into. it was well worth taking a step back from writing and just figuring out what exactly I wanted to do, and the breaks did wonders for how I paced myself.

these were me asking myself questions that struck the very core of how I conduct this cacophony of a kpop smut blog. it made me aware of arbitrary rules I was holding myself to, and gave me a chance to do away with them. everyone has to clear out their inventory every once in a while, and these were mine :DDDD

Everything else:

ive stopped tracking notes bc I learned since I occasionally write nugu and non-smut to never expect 100+ and I'm always pleasantly surprised when I get there slfjglah but yeah, there's better things to keep track of like what I did above

these are what really matter to me: yuri, writing, and the community i've become part of. while I do think the 1022 club is a fun milestone to celebrate, anything else is a bit more work than i care to make a separate post about (except maybe on bluesky lmao)

at my core, im a glassy, a true fan of the little ball of sunshine that is jo yuri. i keep saying that as long as im able to make one of you lovely readers a fan of her too, i'll know i'm doing good! so to all you box followers, all you honorary glassys, please tune in to yuri! she just released her tenth(!!!) OST entitled Spring Days Pass, will appear in Squid Game season 2 which premieres on Dec. 26 on Netflix, and is bound to have a comeback lined up soon :cuteplead: please join me in supporting her! :DDDD

Aaaaand that's it I think? A wild ride for sure, and I'm happy to have spent it here doing what I love. Hopefully all you readers also show greater support to my fellow writers and friends on here, and as always, stay tuned for more box fics in the future!

Thanks for reading, and see you all in October Autumn Box season 2!!

#thought box #1022 club

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off-traveling-in-the-stars · 5 days ago

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thinking about little kid me watching 11 regenerate and how he then refused to watch any Doctor Who that wasn't 11 afterwards, and then the interested started fading out over like 5 years. and then 2 years ago, something shitty happened to me and I was like "wow. maybe I should get back into Doctor Who" and it was perfect timing cuz they were gonna release the specials in a week! and then I watched The Giggle and I saw Ncuti Gatwa as 15 and instantly felt that spark of oh that's the Doctor. that's my Doctor again.

Ncuti literally brought me back to my CHILDHOOD FAVOURITE show in no time at all and he just LEFT in a SHITTY HALF ASSED FINALE with no care or concern given to his untied arcs and storylines.

I can remember how I physically didn't sleep AT ALL after Rogue came out, because I was so excited for what this meant for Doctor Who! I remember my own countdown until s2/s15 aired, and I can remember how hyped I was during RR because of the new style of shots they were doing, the cool animation in Lux, the fantastic character development in The Well, and how watching TS&TE turned it into one of my favourite nuwho episodes ever. I was so excited for what this season meant for 15 as a character, and I was even excited for what Wish World meant in terms of his character. when that promo photo of 15 and Bels at the club hit my social media, I had faith that it'd been a reclamation of the queerness he had to repress in Wish World. that he'd get to be himself, and the beginning of The Reality War even made me have faith in it when he took off the blazer and it turned into a kilt. and then I watched the rest of it, and this might be dramatic, but that GENUINELY felt like a stab in the back.

they turned the Doctor who was a big breath of fresh air for the show, with a brand new energy we hadn't seen before, and had potential for a serious exploration of the Doctor's trauma and repressed tendencies from the Time Lord Victorious days, and they made him go between two nostalgia bait castings. the first Black Doctor (not counting Fugitive considering she didn't have her own run) and they put him between two of RTD's favourite white callbacks. I wasn't too pissed with the bi-generation stuff, and putting Ncuti after David, because I had faith that they'd just sort of acknowledge that he's just a way for 15 to cope with his trauma (it doesn't work but that's for a different post). but to put Billie in a surprise regeneration in an episode that overall slaughtered so many good characters? to give him such a rushed regeneration?? to never give him a Dalek story, or even a Cyberman story??

the ONE DECENT THING I hope comes out of all of this is that Ncuti Gatwa knows that his time as the Doctor was most definitely not wasted. the amount of people who are clearly upset about this, for countless reasons, and I know there are so many people who have expressed gratitude for him getting them back in the show. (shoutout to the Timerogue server that literally gave him a scrapbook all about how much they love his era.) i'm not Black, but I have never felt so seen by a Doctor's era since I watched Matt's run as a little kid, and now here I am with Ncuti's run. I will continue watching the show, this isn't enough to make me quit it altogether - but honestly I don't think I'd blame anyone if they did. especially if RTD stays on as showrunner.

honestly we can only hope BF picks up 15's run, and Ncuti agrees to come back for audiodramas, because, that wasn't enough time at all.

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kevin-the-bruyne · 1 year ago

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I do find it quite insane that people think Bridgerton season 3 was too rushed. I really think Colin's every plot line has been to bring him closer to Penelope. I think there's plenty of gifsets already that show the little affectionate or longing looks between Colin and Penelope starting from season 1. But I don't even mean those when I say that Colin is written in a way that perfectly matches Penelope's fat girl romance story. People skirt around calling Penelope a fat girl and therefore her romance one that's strife with struggles around being fat because somehow that is what they think will betray their fatphobia. But it's not fatphobic to recognize the way that a fatphobic society has fucked with both Colin and Penelope's heads. Colin's incredibly strong, incredibly illogical crush on Marina Thompson, Penelope's cousin, suddenly makes so much sense when you contextualize it as his feelings for Penelope being misguided onto the closest eligible target. (It honestly even felt that way when I watched season 1 as it was coming out.) Because here's the thing about Penelope, right? That society has deemed her ineligible. A fact that we know Colin is painfully aware of by the end of season 2 when he declares to his 'friends' that he would never court her. The same friends he calls shallow to their faces in season 3. So was it surprising that Colin's whole arc in season 3 was about shaking off the shackles society has on his decisions and more importantly, his desires. Because Colin isn't just trying to get by with society's expectations like Anthony was, no. He was trying to change himself to like it. He was trying to buy into it. Because society made him miserable before and maybe embracing it would make him happier. There's a reason he's so passionately anti-Whistledown. She represents those very shackles of society that ironically keeps him from acknowledging his feelings for Penelope. Colin has been in love with Penelope for just as long as she has been in love with him, if not more. But Penelope wasn't the only one who thought that was impossible simply because she was fat. In fact, this is a very common fat girl dating experience, you meet men who would absolutely fuck you, heck they can even love you in their own way but they're not ready to face the shame of other's judgement in acknowledging you. Colin's every appearance on this show starting from season 1 has been setting him up to release those shackles. He wanted to for Marina, but his feelings for her were not genuine. He chased her out of obsession, not love and I think that distinction was infinitely clear to Marina. She could never inspire this soft, sensitive man to harden his backbone in a way that Penelope can. His love for Marina brought him anguish, his love for Penelope brings him joy. The Duke and Daphne barely had a conversation that entire season, Kate and Anthony met and created all of this havoc for what? Colin and Penelope are the only two, whose emotional connection has been established over the course of three whole seasons. Lots of criticisms can be made of their romance I'm sure, but rushed? Listen, I know why people think it's rushed and while season 1 and season 2 Colin would really really care that you think Penelope is unfuckable but season 3 Colin doesn't have a single fuck left to give.

#bridgeton season 3 #bridgerton #polin #colin bridgerton #penelope featherington #I have watched all of season 3 thrice already #and did a s1 and s2 polin rewatch #fat girl romances will never not be special to me

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p1astri-driver1 · 1 month ago

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apologies for bringing up lando fans in to this but i saw this a while ago and they lowkye pissing me off.

they say " we dont baby our driver" and then make posts like this

https://www.tumblr.com/revolutionsingingintherainnn/782807178897719296/ive-seen-a-lot-of-people-talk-about-lando-fans?source=share

"their instagram page has more oscar/oscar's car or joint pictures than that of just lando. ****they do post lando*****, but it's always in the second or the third slide. it's not the front of it, so it looks like they're posting oscar more." the delusion, the victim complex?? god who tf is paying them to do this????? "sponsors only look at the face. the face on their instagram page is not lando. the way they're promoting both drivers differently is clear, and it's clear because that what we're seeing, what's being shown to us." they'll bring up ANYTHING i swear ANYTHING to try and make an insufferable excuse of a point. LIKR WTF DOES SPONSOR HAVE TO DO WITH IT??? she also added a #lando brings in most of the sponsors yet he's barely on their instagram page like you know this how????

"the hate comments on their own instagram posts are vile, and it doesn't take that long to put out a statement that those need to stop, that the fans don't know what's going on behind the scenes, and that the fans have no right to judge a driver on things they can't do. it's not that difficult, but it really seems like mclaren would rather burn to the ground than support their driver." VICTIM COMPLEX FINAL BOSS THIS IS SOOOO PATHETIC AND CHILDISH. i beg of her to run a team handle its social media, drivers, cars AND STILL HAVE TIME to release a "statement". why cant lando do it i thought he wasn't being babied?????

ANYWAYS IM SORRY IM DONE BUT THE WAY LANDO FANS WANT TO PROOF SOMETHING SO BADLY PLAY THE VICTIM COMPLEX AND STILL SAY WE DONT BABY OUR DRIVER????? keep playing in to ur own narrative sweets.

im done i have her blocked now and im now officially anti lando <3

I can't see the post so she probably has me blocked.

I'm afraid the victimization of Lando by his and has been a thing for the longest time and it's what made me go against him as well.

This take is so stupid to even give any time of day but I'll address it because of just how false the claim is. I don't know what McLaren page they've been following , probably the Indy car one because I cannot even begin to say inaccurate it is.

This is just from Miami, the ticked posts are just solo Lando front covers, which you can see greatly outweigh Oscar's, which is weird because if I remember correctly it was Oscar who was the actual race winner. He's won 4/6 of the seasons it's no fucking surprise they're going to show him at the front, but to claim that they 'barely' show Lando is just straight up rage bait, infact from what I can see they show Lando more. Who the fuck cares if Lando's shown in the second or first slide only a 10 year old would even pay attention to these things

'sponsors only look at the faces and the face isn't lando' besides the fact that this is FALSE I'm pretty sure they have enough in person meetings throughout the year to know what their driver looks like to just rely on social media. Is she 5? Lando and Oscar constantly do sponsor ads and yeah Lando brings in more sponsors (like 4 more, 1 being his own father and the other his YouTube channel) because he's been in the sport longer to establish personal brands, Oscar's brought in 2 last year (from what we know his father's company doesn't sponsor McLaren anymore like it did in 2023) and as his image and popularity grows so will his sponsors that's how brand imaging and sponsoring fucking work. Lando's sponsorships bring in nothing compared to the broad sponsorships McLaren already has with Google, Mastercard ect. So if they believe he's the sole reason McLaren has any money or would go backrupt if he left, they're delusional as fuck.

They're convinced Oscar's father is richer than Lando's (I mean the inferiority complex and insecurity is painfully obvious, they both grew up rich, I didn't know 200+ million was poor now) and that's how he 'bought the entire team for Oscar's when there is so indication of such a thing except for a reddit comment that had no proof to back up their claims. Oscar's father company's net worth isn't publicly available, neither is his share %. The only thing we know is it makes at least 43-44 mil revenue every year which is a stark difference from the billions they claim he has. And as for 'buying the team' his company isn't even associated with McLaren as it was in his rookie year when Lando's father's still is.

Do they believe Lando is the only one who receives hate comments? His comments are 'vile'? Did they forget all of 2023 where they joined in on hating Max for WINNING (Lando isn't even winning) every comment section that wasn't even red bulls own page was filled with Max hate, and not to mention it was worse irl to the point they had to tighten his security in fear of threats of violence. Max dealt with it as maturely as possible. Redbull didn't put out any statements regarding the hate. Why the fuck should he get a special statement for something every driver goes though, hell every athlete goes though.

'fans have no right to judge what a driver can or can't do' IT'S A SPORT WHAT ELSE ARE THEY GOING TO DO?! HAVE THEY NEVER WATCHED SPORTS BEFORE? ARE THEY NEW HERE, DO THEY NOT KNOW HOW THE INTERNET WORKS?! Lando makes it pretty clear what he can't do, and their hypocrisy is big and bold, they literally are Oscar's no.1 haters for the exact thing they defend Lando from.

im sure it isn't very supportive of McLaren to give Lando a championship winning car 🤷🏻‍♀️ they definitely weren't supportive when coming into the season, Oscar being a championship contendor didn't cross their minds because it was time for the 'norris era'. They're two faced and only started to support Oscar when he cleared Lando every weekend and they had no choice but to back Oscar as well or else they'd look stupid

#anti norris #anti lando norris #fuck ln4 fans #ask #anon asks

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brf-rumortrackinganon · 1 month ago

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One of the reaction I had about the photoshop fiasco is that Kate put too much pressure on herself for her family too always look good and polished. I get that when it comes to the children, it is a sign of love. She wants to make sure they look the best as the pictures will be there to stay. But I think now she's a bit trapped in the high standard she seems to have put on herself. Like who cares if some pictures they share are a bit blurred or that not all the children are looking at the camera or that on some events they're not all color coordinated (this reminds me of the dutch RF. Whenever they share pictures, they always seem to be attending different events or are dressed for different seasons).

I also feel the same when it comes to her fashion. I know fashion is a big part of royal watching but it has now become such a point of focus when it comes to her, that KP had to say they wouldn't be releasing details on her outfit anymore. It was nice to see her using her outfits to send messages, but again it seems to have trapped her a bit. Choose appropriate outfits for the events you're attending, but maybe be a bit more relaxed about it, by rewearing a lot of outfits, even for state dinners or other big occasions for example.

I don't think Kate puts too much pressure on herself about their family appearances. I think it's the media's expectation of the family being perfectly polished that puts the pressure on Kate and what we saw in photogate was, possibly, Kate cracking under that societal pressure because of the conspiracy theories, the critical commentary, and the paparazzi. We know wasn't feeling well (it was taken at the last possible moment), we know she didn't want to be photographed (the way she pulled the kids in close to hide her body), but yet she still gave us the photo anyway. That's society's expectations and media pressure, not something she did herself.

Also I don't see the color coordination as an arduous effort - I see it as the kids are young enough that they still wear what Kate lays out for them. It'll start changing soon enough, especially as Charlotte steps into her own as a teenager.

As for Kate's own fashion, she could do better with her rewears, but you know what? She doesn't actually have that much to draw from. First, she was out of commission for 3 pregnancies, a COVID pandemic/lockdown, had small children, and cancer/chemotherapy so let's say conservatively that's 6 years worth of clothes she probably isn't going to wear again. Then consider that she was 29 when she married, so most of the clothes she wore pre-George we probably aren't going to see again, so that's another 2 years of outfits she isn't going to rewear. So what's left is that Kate has only about 6 years worth of clothes to draw from for her rewears.

6 years isn't a whole of time compared to someone like Charles and Anne, who are wearing outfits 20, 30, 40 years old. So I don't mind that Kate spends on fashion. She's building up her wardrobe, finding what works for her, supporting British industry, and compared to a lot of other royal women, spends economically. We'll see her in more rewears eventually as her style settles, but it won't be rewears from throughout her whole life. It'll be rewears from her current phase of life. Yes, she might dust off a pre-William coat or a pre-George gown, but those will be rare.

(Since Louise has worn a bit of Sophie's things, the Scandinavian princesses are wearing their mother's gowns, and Carole and Kate share items, I think it's a fair assumption that we'll see Charlotte in many of Kate's early outfits/accessories more than we'll see Kate wear them.)

#waleses #fashion

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despazito · 3 months ago

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I was wondering if you’d be open to talking a little bit about your experience with Basil’s grooming needs in particular? How often does he get brushed at home vs groomed professionally or bathed? I’m not in the active market for a new dog by any means but recently lost a heeler mix and one of the breed recommendations that came up on the AKC breed match quiz was a Eurasier so I was just kinda thinking about some of the logistics of their care!

imo as far as fluffy double coated dogs go their coat looks more daunting to maintain than it really is, it's not excessively woolly and repels dirt very well that unless it's a twig or burr the debris just sloughs off once dry.

brushing at least 2 or 3 times a week will prevent matting, basil's most prone spot for tangles is behind his ears but it can vary between dogs. another vulnerable spot is friction on the collar area, a way to mitigate that is to just not have the collar permanently on, we only wear it for outings. here's some eurasier grooming resources, minimally you can get the job done line-brushing with just a greyhound comb and pin brush, slicker brush is a nice bonus to have and anything bladed should only be used to remove mats!! a blade will slice the protective guard hairs and damage the coat both in function and prettiness. eurasiers don't require haircuts beyond a foot trim, but most groomers will throw in a sanitary area trim which can be convenient if your dog isn't being shown.

they really don't need frequent bathing which is nice because some eurasiers don't like getting bathed and can get vocal about it lol (not shiba levels bad, but many doth protest). you can bathe them seasonally or take them in for a full spa day when they blow their coats however my breeder really didn't emphasize routine bathing, but an 8 week full groom schedule shouldn't harm the coat when correct products are being used. If you have low tolerance for fur all over your house, clothes, loved ones, and occasional food then frequent grooming is better! I'll be honest i groom/bathe basil at home and haven't taken him to a professional in well over a year now.. part of the reason i can get away with this is because he's still intact, blowing the coat is a hormonal process and many desexed dogs will not release the undercoat as easily, so i definitely recommend finding a pro groomer for a spayed/neutered eurasier.

age, hormones, health, and genetics all play a role in the coat and even within the breed there can be differences in fluff factor.

here's two different intact dogs from the same kennel receiving BOB titles, Albionspitz Rigel (left) is a male ~4yo here and Albionspitz Beloved (right) is a female also pictured around 4-5yo (according to my math)

imo the eurasier is on average a tad more moderately furred and less of a hassle than typical examples its three parent breeds (chow, samoyed, keeshond), here you can see the difference in coat type of the eurasier next to keeshonden and sammy.

that being said lower maintenance =/= no maintenance and falling behind on brushing can quickly snowball into a headache! I've only ever had fluffy spitzy dogs so i can't really tell you how it compares to living with a single coat or shorthair, fuzz everywhere is the only dog experience i've known lol

#i really really need to take basil in for a professional blowout ugh he could look soo much better than he does now #i'd like to build a good rapport with someone who would agree to a 3-4 month schedule #eurasier

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stylesparker · 2 years ago

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second chance (at love)

PAIRING: Sam Winchester x Fem!Reader

WORD COUNT: 5.7k

WARNINGS: season 2 era, character death, a lot of dialogue (sorry), horribly written fight scenes, overused tropes (but I don't care), and of course the usual mixture of fluff and angst

A/N: I finally got around to finishing this request, and I'm so sorry I took absolutely forever with this. I hope you like the way this turned out! I had so much fun writing it. Reblog if you like as always :)

"It's okay, Sammy, it's okay."

Those words cycle through his head over and over again, plaguing him as he stares at you; unmoving, lifeless. Every time he closes his eyes he sees the knife impale your stomach, the blood that seeps through the fabric of your shirt, and worst of all, the life draining out of your eyes as you clutch onto him in your last moments.

You've been dead for seven minutes.

"Well isn't this something."

Sam snaps his head to the woman that appears out of thin air. Her hair is dark red, long and silky, and she's dressed in black jeans and a black leather jacket. Her smile is sickeningly sweet.

"Poor Winchester, lost the girl, huh?"

"Who the hell are you?" Sam's voice comes out gruff and harsh, his glare menacing even to the demon. Her smirk gets wider when Sam grips you tighter and pulls you closer to his chest.

"Does it matter? I'm here to help." She blinks, letting her eyes turn to their natural state, that dreadful black signifying her as one thing.

Sam scoffs, "Right, 'cause all you have are good intentions."

She shrugs, "I'm here to make a deal. You gonna take it or not?"

Sam knew this wasn't right. He knew he promised you if anything happened, he'd live the life you thought he deserved. But, you didn't know what it was like to have to watch the person you love die, and know that person wasn't coming back. He stares, and stares, until finally he agrees.

"What do I have to do?"

DAY 1

"Are you sure you're feeling okay?" Sam asks you for the tenth time, watching you pull on your boots with a wince. He stands in front of you from where you're seated on the motel bed.

"Sam, I am fine, you don't need to hover over me like I'm some wounded animal that's gonna collapse out of nowhere!"

"Well you are kind of a wounded animal at the moment-"

"Sam."

He sighs, "I'm just making sure. Can you blame me?"

You release a sigh of your own, standing up from your spot (not without Sam extending his arm to help), and rest your hands on his shoulders. "I know, I'm sorry. But really, I'm fine. It was a close one, but I'm still here aren't I?"

Sam looks at you gravely, eyes gliding over your features like he's taking you in. He opens his mouth like he's about to say something, but closes it quickly. After a moment, he nods, and gives you a soft smile. "Yeah," he swiftly lands a gentle kiss on your forehead and takes your bag before you can grab it yourself, "I'll take our stuff out to the car, meet me out there when you're ready."

You sway on your feet, looking at Sam weirdly as he makes his way out the door. You wonder why he took so long to answer you, but you push the thought away when you realize that you almost died, so of course Sam's gonna have a hard time dealing with it.

You follow him outside with a new pep in your step, determined to make Sam feel better. As soon as he shuts the trunk, you settle into the car together, and you wait for Sam to pull out and drive off. Instead, he pulls out one of Dean's CD's and pops it in, while you look at him curiously, intrigued to find out what he chose.

Once the music starts, you smile and stare at him incredulously. "Really? Since when have you wanted to listen to Metallica?"

He shrugs with a small smile, "I don't know, just in the mood."

You laugh, "Who are you, and what have you done with Sam?"

"Shut up," He rolls his eyes but that small smirk remains on his lips. "Can't you let me be nice?"

"Dean, is that you?"

"Stop it!" He playfully slaps your arm just before he puts the car in reverse and takes off down the road. Listening to your laugh again is music to his ears, and he can't help looking at you as you bob your head to the music, not paying attention to him whatsoever.

He doesn't know how he's going to pull off this deal, but he's going to do everything in his power to bring you back.

Even if you hate him after.

DAY 2

"How do you have no rooms available? There are like no cars outside!" You angrily shout at the teenager who's working the front desk at some shitty motel you and Sam found off the road. The kid shrugs, which angers you even more, so you huff and slam the door on your way out, stomping up to the Impala with a confused looking Sam watching you.

As soon as you swing the door open he asks you, "What's wrong?"

"There's a damn kid in there telling me there are no rooms left! I swear to god, and he barely even looked at me!" You plop down on the seat, rubbing your eyes a tad harsher than Sam thinks you should, and look at him sadly. "I was really hoping we didn't have to sleep in the car tonight."

He rubs your arm in hopes of cheering you up, and says quietly, "Well, at least it's not cold out like the last time we had to sleep in the car?"

You shiver at the thought, "Oh my god, my toes were actually blue the next morning."

He smiles, "Exactly, so let's find a spot and rest for the night, yeah?"

You nod, but you still pout sadly in your seat as he drives. "I should be making you feel better, you haven't had a wink of sleep since like, what was it? Tuesday?"

"I think Monday."

"Sam, it's Thursday! You didn't sleep Tuesday morning?"

"No." He shrugs like it doesn't matter.

"What were you doing while I was sleeping then?"

"Watching over you."

You didn't know what to say after that. You don't know how you'd forgotten, but Sam clearly hadn't. Now you feel bad.

"Oh." You gulp. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, you don't have to apologize. I just, I don't know, wanted to make sure you would be okay."

His words make your heart skip a beat, and you can't help but lean over and grab his hand. His eyes dart to the sudden touch on his hand, and he glances over to you. You're looking at him so fondly, and he wishes he could just tell you. Get it over with.

But he can't.

So he lets you hold his hand in silence.

He drives for another 15 minutes until he finds a trailer park with almost no trailers, so he figures this will be a good enough spot for the night. He doubts anyone will show up here at least until the morning, so he takes the risk. He's so tired he doesn't even really care.

Sam opens the door on the driver's side to get out, walking to the trunk to grab the few blankets that you guys have, and comes back with one.

"What, no blanket for me?" You joke.

He throws it to you with a blank stare, almost like he's saying really?

"That is for you, jerk."

"Where's yours?"

"That's the only one we have."

Your mouth drops with surprise, "What? I could've sworn we at least had two?"

"We must have left the other one with Dean." He shrugs. "It's fine, I'm not that cold."

"Sam-"

His eyes pin you down with a hard stare, interrupting what you were about to say, so you give up, but not without a mumbled, "fine, jeez."

While you curl up against the door on your side with half of your blanket under your head, and the other half over your body, you look at Sam out of the corner of your eye with sympathy. He's a lanky guy, maybe not so thin since he's got the muscle, but the dude has long ass legs. The upper half of his body is leaning against the car door like yours, but his legs are uncomfortably folded so he doesn't get into your space. You hear him huff and shuffle around, which makes you wince and feel even worse than you did. You're not even close to comfortable so you can imagine how he feels.

For almost half an hour, you both listen to the other shift around without saying anything, and it gets to the point Sam can't handle it anymore. Until he gets an idea.

"Y/N?" He doesn't have to ask if you're awake because you're both well aware neither of you have slept.

"Yeah, Sammy?"

You peek your eyes open, and his arms are still crossed, but he shifts so his front is facing you.

"Would you wanna... lay together?"

He looks nervous, so you joke with him to hopefully ease him. "What, you too cramped over there?"

He scoffs, "A bit, yeah."

You giggle, sitting up and scooching closer to him, "Okay. Stretch your legs."

He extends his legs out across the seat, and opens his arms to invite you in. Now you're the nervous one as you shift even closer and lay your head on his chest, laying on top of him almost completely flat. You don't want to admit how much more comfortable this is. You fix the blanket so it's over the both of you, and he wraps his arms around your waist, holding you more lightly than you thought he would. Or maybe hoped.

"Better?" You asked.

He nods, his chin lightly grazing your head, "Much."

Your back is to his chest with his arms resting over your stomach, and you're glad he can't really see your face because you can only imagine how bad you're blushing right now. You shift in his hold again, which has him looking down at you and squeezing your hip.

"You okay?" He asks.

"Mmhm." You nod quickly. You really want to turn over, but... that's weird right? That would be too close? This already seems intimate enough, and he can probably tell how awkward you're already being. You hope he doesn't think it's because you like him- no, because you cannot like Sam. Your best friend of nine years is off limits. You've been in the same bed before, you've even cuddled before, but you were kids then. It's different when you're 23 right? You haven't really thought about Sam like that before, but, you guess it's bound to happen because, well, Sam is Sam. You know it shouldn't be weird, not at all, but you're both adults who know about certain adult things that take place when adults are alone and comfortable with each other and-

"Y/N?"

Shit. "Yeah?" You try not to sound squeaky.

"What's up?"

"Um," you steady yourself, "can I turn over? I just- I feel a little awkward staring at the ceiling."

He laughs a little, "Yeah, of course. Is that what you were thinking about?"

"...Yeah?"

"Why does that sound like a question?" You can almost hear his smile.

"It's not." You assure.

He lifts his arms so you can turn over, and you do with a little bit of struggle, trying not to elbow him too much, but he gets hit with no complaint. Once your cheek is pressed to his chest you breathe a sigh of relief, and try not to think about how he stiffened then relaxed when you wrapped your arms around his abdomen.

"Better?" He asks.

"Much." You copy him from earlier, and his chest shakes with his laughter. You don't speak after that, but you relish the moment with him, despite feeling unnecessarily guilty for it. After a while, you fall asleep, and Sam does too.

He hopes you were thinking about him, and you wish that you weren't. He wishes you would say you love him, but you hope that he never finds out.

DAY 3

The next morning wasn't weird like you thought it would be. It was almost like you had done this a million times before. But, you had a case today, so there was no time to think about Sam. Only your job.

You spent most of the day driving around the town trying to find answers to three consecutive murders. All women, and an obvious lead to werewolves. You never really thought about how well you worked with Sam until now; all day you bounced ideas off of each other, gaining clues and offering suggestions like it was easy. It was, you guess, when your partner is so damn likable. Once you found the location, you and Sam were quick to head out the door and track down those werewolves.

They were about 20 minutes out from where you guys had been located, and when you spotted them in the cabin shortly off the road in the woods, you both agreed this would be a stealth mission.

Sam shut off the car and quietly shut the door shortly after you, and you both go to the back to grab your weapons and whatever else you'd need. He points to himself and then the cabin, and you roll your eyes at the man, allowing him to go first and lead you there. His long legs are hard to keep up with but you make do as quietly as you can, and every so often he'll stop and put a hand out to stop you. It tends to hover over your stomach so you have to try harder not to be too loud when you breathe.

A loud bang and shouts erupt from the cabin, interrupting the silence that filled the air, and you both take off in that direction. Sam kicks the door in, allowing you to take notice of the girl tied to a chair in the middle of the room, and two men facing off against each other; one on the floor and the other hovering over him. You and Sam don't even look at each other, as soon as the two of you make eye contact with the two of them, it's on. Sam goes for the one standing, immediately charging at him and toppling the both of them over while you go for the one on the ground. He's up quicker than you would have wished but you still throw your knife in time to where his shirt gets pinned to the floor.

While he's distracted trying to pull it out, you land on top of him and stab your extra through his chest, twisting it until he's too weak to throw you off of him. You don't hear anything behind you, so you let off of him a second too soon, and while you're looking for Sam the werewolf grabs the knife and slices your shoulder with it. You scream in pain, and get torn off of him from the other one. You hit the ground next to him hard on your bad shoulder, and you kick his leg out from under him, sending him to the floor.

Sam appears behind him with a nasty looking cut on his forehead, and his shirt torn to pieces, but he's able to kill him before he gets to you. The other one grabs Sam's leg, knocking him to the floor, allowing him to get the upper hand and attack him. Before he lands the final blow, you grab the shotgun and shoot him in the head, and watch as Sam topples over shoving him off. As much as you want to worry about him, you run to the girl first.

She's sobbing as you cut off the rope that was tying her hands and feet to the chair, and you let her fall into your embrace as she uses you for comfort, rubbing her back and whispering reassurances that you hope is making her feel better. You feel Sam's hand grab your shoulder and you look up at him, finding a troublesome look on his face.

"There's more out front. Get her out of here, I'll distract them."

"What? Sam, you're coming with us!"

"There's at least three of them on their way in here-" He starts.

"And you'll shoot them! Grab the gun and let's go!" You shout angrily, which has him furrowing his brows at you but he grabs the gun anyway and covers you as you carry the girl. You only make it halfway to the car before the other werewolves have found you, and Sam's only able to take out one of them before one is on him. The gun gets knocked out of his hand, and this is when you realize you'd left the other one in the cabin.

"Shit." You mutter.

"No, no, no, no-" the girl starts crying and freaking out again and you shush her, stupidly running in the opposite direction to try and outrun the werewolf. Again, stupidly. You're not as fast as a werewolf, especially with a girl who's about the same size as you in your arms, so he's able to catch up to you no problem.

He throws you both to the ground before he's pinning both of your hands in his tight grip and holding his body weight above you, forcing your hands together to hold them in one hand, and using the other to choke you. You hear the girl crying and you're pretty sure she's running away from the sounds of the leaves and dirt crunching beneath her feet.

You struggle to kick him off of you, he's much bigger than you are, so you hopelessly kick and scream as much as you can, only hoping Sam gets to you in time.

Just as you think he won't make it and you're losing consciousness, his hands leave your neck and suddenly you're gasping for air. You can sort of make out Sam and the werewolf fighting, but your vision is blurry so you can't tell who's on top of the other. Your breathing is harsh and you can hardly see, so when hands grab your shoulders and tug you upwards, you scream and swat at him, not realizing that it's Sam.

"Hey, hey! It's me, it's Sam!" He rubs the dirt off your face with one hand holding the part between your good shoulder and your neck so you don't fall over as you cough yourself into a fit.

"Sam," you rasp, and grab onto his arms tightly as you finally start to catch your breath again. You don't mean for the tears to fall out of your eyes, but you did almost get choked to death and your neck and shoulder hurt like a bitch, so it was bound to happen.

"W-Where's the girl?" Your voice comes out scratchy, but Sam just holds you and looks around while you lean against him.

"I saw her run for it, I don't know where though. It looked like she went towards the road, but it's too dark out for us to go after her like this. Let's just hope someone nice picked her up."

You nod, coughing into his shoulder, and his large hand rubs your back as you start to breathe normally again.

"Are you okay? I thought you-"

"I'm good," he reassures, "let's focus on getting you out of here."

Your shoulder is pretty bad, but his head is smeared with dirt and blood, and the cut on his forehead looks even bigger than when you first saw it.

"But," you cough, "Your head-"

"I'm the one who can stand on their own two feet at the moment, so would you just let me help you up?" You roll your eyes, but you let him carry you to the car anyway.

DAY 4

It's way past midnight, and you're pretty sure you and Sam scared the living daylights out of the front desk girl at the motel you found. The Impala wasn't stacked with any first-aid, so you had to go in looking like you were both mauled and run over by a truck fifty times. You paid, she gave you the key, and she was immediately running to the back, whether that was to call the police or hide you weren't sure.

You and Sam clung onto each other and helped each other up the stairs to the next floor, hobbling to your door like a couple of sick children.

You could tell Sam probably had a concussion, he's starting to look even worse for wear than he was. But he still insists on cleaning you up first.

You try not to whimper too loud when he lifts you onto the bathroom counter, but he shushes you gently when you let out silent scream and you grip his bicep incredibly tight.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." He whispers.

"It's okay, Sammy, it's okay. I'm fine." Your reassurance falls on deaf ears. His grip tightens, but he doesn't look all there anymore.

"It's okay, Sammy, it's okay."

Suddenly, he's back on that road again, holding you in his arms. He remembers how cold you were, how lifeless. He feels weird because, he can see you right there in front of him, but somehow, his brain is telling him you're gone. You're not here anymore. His plan failed and he never got to tell you-

"Sam!"

His eyes refocus and he feels your hands on his cheeks. They're warm, and they're soft, nothing like how they were then. They rub his face gently, but the look on your face is one of concern, and mainly fear. He didn't realize how hard he was holding onto you, letting go as soon as he comes back from whatever that was.

"Sammy, where'd you go?"

He's not entirely sure, but he knows he can't tell you, or it could potentially break the deal. "Huh?"

He tilts his head slightly, eyes gazing at you like he didn't just stare into your soul with the most fearful tear filled look you'd ever seen.

"Sam, what happened?" You ask seriously, "I lost you for a second there."

He shakes his head. "No you didn't, I'm good." He breaks eye contact and grabs the alcohol, pouring it onto the cloth and gripping your shoulder.

"On three?"

You sigh, and take a deep breath. "Yeah."

"1-"

"2-"

"HOLY FUCK-" You practically double over and almost fall off the counter. You would have if Sam hadn't wrapped his other arm around you and kept you still while he cleaned the blood off and disinfected your wound.

"Sh, sh, sh, you're good, you're good. You got it, yeah? Breathe with me."

You grit your teeth as you try your best to follow along. "Fucking- shit, I hate you so bad right now."

"You'll get over it."

Once he's done cleaning it, he's able to wrap it and get it fixed up in no time. It still hurts, but, you've let him baby you enough.

"Alright, Winchester, your turn."

"You can't even lift your arm-"

With your good hand, you lift your other arm and use it to smack him across the shoulder.

He scoffs, "That's cheating."

"I still have one good arm left, so watch your mouth."

He rolls his eyes, but he relaxes when your soft touch spreads over the skin on his forehead. He watches you as you clean and bandage the wound just like he did, but now your faces are close, and he remembers he's standing in between your legs.

"Stop staring at me." You mumble, concentrating on stitching the last part on his cut, but also on the way he's staring you down.

"I'm not." He shakes his head, but you pinch him for moving, so he mutters out a sorry, and stands still again. A couple minutes later, you tap him on the shoulder, stating that you're all finished, and he gets this look on his face when he moves away from you.

"Can you uh- help me out?" You laugh, embarrassed a little bit for asking him to help you off the counter, but he does it without even thinking. His hands slide under your underarms again, lifting you just a little to where you can slide your butt off the counter. "Thanks."

"No problem." He nods his head, sending you his boyish smile, and it makes your heart flutter in your chest a bit. Did this guy really just stand between your legs and patch you up?

You both get into your separate beds, and lay down on your fresh clean pillows. a nice contrast to the doors of the Impala. But, as much as you like the bed, you almost wish Sam would invite you into his. It's much more silent than you wish it was, but Sam must have felt the same way because his voice cuts through the silence.

"Hey, Y/N?"

You look over, "Yeah?"

"Try not to get yourself killed too much, yeah? I don't know what I'd do without you."

You smile softly, "The same goes for you, Winchester."

He thinks that's the closest thing to a confession that he can get.

DAY 6

He wishes you would've stayed in bed longer.

"How is it that I've almost died like three times in the same week?" You ask him, hands holding your face up on your knees while the two of you sit on the curb on the side of the road.

The Impala is crushed.

Dean can most definitely fix it. But not until he's murdered the both of you and buried you in Bobby's backyard.

"How about we not mention that?" Sam suggests, peering over at you while you stare directly ahead at the car.

"Why not? I mean, we almost die everyday doing what we do, but like, this week- man, this week has been horrible." This sounds like the start of a ramble, and he's right. "I've come like an inch from death so many times this week I'm surprised it didn't actually happen. Like, right there, ten minutes ago, I swear I thought it was over. One minute, I'm singing along with you and the next Baby's upside down in the middle of nowhere." You shrug, and after a minute, you start to laugh to yourself.

"I feel like this is some sort of sign from the universe or something, so- so I'm just gonna say it." You push yourself to your feet and turn around, facing him, while he's still sitting on the curb looking up at you curiously.

"Say what?" He asks cautiously.

"Dude, I love you." You breathe out all in one breath. "I love you, Sam. You're my best friend, and I don't think I tell you that nearly enough, but you are. And so is Dean, but Dean's different, he's not- he's not you Sam. He's my best friend too, but you're..." he wants to laugh at the way you're staring at the sky and shaking your hands trying to come up with what you're trying to say, but he's so gobsmacked right now he can't really do anything else but stare in wonder. "You're Sam. You sleep with me in the car even though I can tell you get nervous, and even though I'm always nervous too you make it go away. You still stick by me even when I'm stupid and you carry me away from all the bad guys that try to kill us," you laugh," and you stitch me up and bandage all my wounds when I'm hurt even when I don't want you to because I know you love me and you show me better, and I wish I could do the same, so this is me showing you."

He stands from where he was sitting, but he can't really move anything else. He wants to move towards you, though something is holding him back. His chest starts to fill with dread, and suddenly, the deal is starting to glare at him straight in the face.

"Please don't let it be weird now, you don't have to say anything, just- let's sit with this and figure out how to get home, yeah?"

"Well, Winchester, things turned out for you, didn't they?"

Your body turns to look at the woman behind you, and Sam merely looks over your shoulder to see the demon he was hoping not to see.

Your face contorts, "Who the hell are you?"

Her face brightens, and her smirk gets wider as she glances between you and Sam.

"Aren't you two just perfect for each other?" She claps her hands together. "I'm so glad you've come to your senses, hun. Now, I can finally be on my merry way."

"No," you stop her, "How do you know us?" Your body twists again to face Sam, and all of a sudden, your heart sinks to the bottom of your stomach. Just by looking at his face you know something is wrong. "Sam?"

"I'll explain everything-"

"Go easy on him, sweetheart. What he did saved your life." She winks, and her signature red hair swishes when she disappears, just like that, just as she'd appeared.

"Sam..." you start, your voice dangerously low, "Who the hell was that."

He clenches his fists, taking a step closer to you, "Y/N, look-"

"Just tell me straight out, Sam! What was she talking about?" You practically shout at him, you're so anxious, you don't know what to do, what to expect. But what you possibly expected was nothing like what he said.

"You died. She was the reason why I got you back."

Your eyes hold a heaviness to them that only great sadness could bring, and he wishes he could take away that burden but he can't. He gave it to you.

"What?" You whisper. You say anything any louder and you think you might snap.

"She made a deal: I have seven days to-to..." he sighs, closing his eyes and prepares himself for what he's going to say next, "to get you to tell me you love me. Otherwise, you would stay dead. Permanently."

You don't say anything for a minute or two, and he doesn't expect you to, but he wishes you would have more of a reaction than what you're having now. There's this blank stare on your face, but it's sunken and it looks like he's given you burden upon burden to carry. Maybe he has.

"So basically," you start, clearing your throat, "You made a fucking bet, with a demon, you could get me to fall in love with you in seven days?" You scoff, "Otherwise, I'd be dead for good."

"No, that's not-"

"That's what it sounds like to me, Sam!" You scream.

His face falls, "I saved you. Nothing, and I mean nothing, else mattered, okay? I didn't care what kind of bet- no, I meant deal, I meant deal, it was, okay." He shakes his head. "Obviously I knew it was wrong, but I couldn't lose you, alright? I had the opportunity and I took it."

Your heart burns, it feels like you need to claw it out and throw some water on it, but all you can do is let it fester and grow and heat up every single nerve ending in your body. You want to be fine with it, he saved you, but, this isn't how it's supposed to be.

"I can't do this right now." You mutter, closing your eyes.

"What?" He steps forward, and you take three steps back.

"I have to go."

DAY 7

"You picked her up, right? She's with you?"

"Yes, Sam, she's with me. And you better be with Baby, you hear me?"

Sam rolls his eyes, and looks to the car that's being worked on in the shop.

"And don't let them touch her. I'll do the work myself when we get her back to Bobby's."

Sam grimaces, "It's a little late for that, buddy."

"Sam!-"

"Look, drop her off, okay. When you come here, I'll take the car back and you stay here, got it?"

"You're so lucky I saw Y/N first, or I would've whooped your ass-"

"Yeah, I got it, see you soon."

He hangs up the call and slaps it closed, the sound echoing into the air as he puts it back into his pocket. He looks around, but it's just empty road, and the car shop.

So he'll just have to wait.

...

"Dean?" Your voice calls out through the house loud and clear, and it makes him sad to think you may not be so happy seeing that it's him.

"It's me."

Your figure appears in the doorway of the kitchen, opposite of him.

"Oh, hey."

"Hey."

You're both quiet for a moment, not really knowing what to say, or even how to start, but Sam can only think of one thing.

"You can be mad at me, I deserve it. But just know I did it because I love you. Even though you made me promise to all that moving on shit, I couldn't do it." He pauses. "I know you love me too, but if you need time I understand that."

"Sam," your voice breaks, "I understand why you did it, but why did you have to lie?"

His chest sucked in, "She-she made it a part of the deal, that you couldn't know. If you knew or found out it would've been off."

Your shoulders droop and you step toward him, just one step.

"I just- I just can't believe that I died, Sam."

"I know." He nods, "I know. If you... have any more questions, I'm here to answer them."

You shake your head, but don't say anything else. Neither of you really have to, everything's been said. It's up to you where this goes from here.

You take two steps closer, closing most of the gap between you, and lean into him. His right hand drops the bag he was holding and wraps his arms around you, holding you close just as he did several days ago. You don't hug, or squeeze, but you're there, and that's what matters.

"I love you," you breathe, "but you're such an idiot."

He shakes a little bit with laughter, "I know."

"But, if I'm being honest," you look up at him, "I probably would have done the same thing too."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Nothing else has to be said. But he can't help but lean his face closer to yours, waiting, hoping that this wasn't something he was imagining. Your eyes bore into his, and you're the one who closes the space between you. Once the gap is filled there's no breaking it apart, and neither of you plan to.

#sam winchester x reader #sam winchester x female reader #sam winchester x you #sam winchester x y/n #supernatural

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elephantshoetoo · 5 months ago

Note

Hey there! Loved the recent YT video of yours. Um, Let's dive straight to the question.

First, I am a massive Byler believer. (all for the right reasons, I believe) But recently I keep seeing posts on "why Byler isn't happening" and the reason people usually drop is "the story is set on 80s, it was a difficult time to be gay"--- And I'm like, 1. well, it's mainly a fictional show. there isn't upside down or at least we have yet to find that to be true . so writers can do what they like. 2. just because 80s was a difficult time to express openly to others that they were gay doesn't mean people didn't fall in love and decided to love and live with each other for the rest of their lives. 3. am I really watching the same show with the rest of the world? am i overanalyzing it? or am I really gonna be kicked on the stomach when Season 5 releases (which I hope releases soon, every day of wait is killing me) What's your take on this? Hopefully you'd answer. I rarely open Tumbler but I will come back for your answer. Lots of Love, A Fellow ST Fan

Ooh, thank you for your question - this is my first real ask. I'm so excited 😊

Take heart, dear Byler shipper. This is a show for the underdogs, a show about fighting against forced conformity and righting the wrongs of the past.

I grew up in the 80's, and yes, gay people existed, though many of them were closeted out of fear or denial. I had gay friends and dated several gay guys who didn't come out until years later, so I do understand why people might think it would be unrealistic for Byler to happen, but yeah, it's a sci-fi show, not a documentary. It's not about realism or showing how it was. It's about showing how it should be (in the end), so I don't think the time period is going to stop them.

In fact, I think the time period is significant. I think the monsters and the Upside Down are all symbolic of the horrors of growing up as a gay person in a place and time that was hostile towards them.

But also...

The first Pride celebration in Indiana happened in Indianapolis in 1987.

1987.

Why does that year sound familiar...? Oh, yes. That's when most of ST 5 takes place - the year of their first Pride celebration. Hmm... Coincidence?

And Byler can happen without them coming out to the whole town. They could keep it amongst their friends and family, the way Robin has only told Steve so far. Nobody doubts Rovickie happening, even though they are also gay in the 80's (making those arguments against Byler completely invalid). Vickie has far less queer coding than Mike Wheeler and is also in a straight relationship, but everyone sees it coming after only a few flirty scenes, because nobody knows or cares about Vickie's boyfriend or had any preconceived ideas about her character that they now have to adjust. People don't like adjusting their preconceived ideas. It makes them uncomfortable. It makes them question the safety of their familiar little world and forces them to expand their minds. Growth is never easy.

But... if they don't already see the queer coding behind Mike and all the hints that Byler is on the horizon... adjusting their preconceived ideas would actually explain Mike's whole character arc, the "journey" he's been on and the weird behavior that makes no sense through any other lens. That airport "hug"? Pretending to ignore Will all day while furtively glancing at him and noticing every little thing he does? Classic crush behaviour. It's so obvious unless you're straight-up in denial. They've used so many of the traditional romantic tropes (love triangle, boy-next-door, "just friends" to lovers, Cyrano De Bergerac, etc...), yet people refuse to see it because Byler isn't a traditional couple.

So, yeah... It's a story. It can do whatever it wants. If it's a good story - which I believe it is - it will pick up all these breadcrumbs it's laid down and follow them to a satisfying conclusion. Otherwise, what would have been the point? Why have Will believe he's never going to fall in love? Why have him fall in love with Mike specifically, and leave a whole bunch of hints that Mike returns his feelings, making the audience root for them, if that's not where they're planning to take this? It would make no sense at all and be sloppy storytelling, imo.

Thank you so much for your question, and for watching our YouTube video! I hope this cures you of any Byler doubt.

Love,

Byler Mom

💙💛💚

#byler #stranger things #byler endgame #will byers #mike wheeler #mike wheeler loves will byers #will byers loves mike wheeler #asks #byler theory #byler mom

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nightskydragons · 9 months ago

Text

Red the atrociraptor will probably be introduced in season 2 very causally, at most will probably get a throw away line like " oh I don't remember their being four" from one of the characters

But my crack theory is that red absence is related to Brooklyn surviving the attack and might foreshadow where the story might take the handlers character

(**Slight season 2 spoilers**)

Alright, so let me explain. In the last episode, it revealed that the handler was responsible for Brooklyn alleged death during the attack of the allosaurus. Now, at first, this sounds a bit convoluted. Why involve the handler when she is already working with the people who set Brooklyn up. However, I think this holds the answer as to why Brooklyn was able to escape with her life. From what the show presented us, the handler/the person she works for isn't fond of how the regional director of the DPW was handling their problems, so they decided to send her out to make sure Brooklyn is taken care of. So on that night the four atrociraptor were released to kill Brooklyn, unfortunately at the same time when the allosaurus was dropped off. Seeing Brooklyn as her kill, the allosaurus fought off the atrociraptor In a effort to protect her food, created a very brutal battle as the atrociraptor tried to get to Brooklyn. Who in the meantime was slowly getting to cover as the theropods were fighting. This fight eventually ending with the allosaurus injuring red severely which at that point lead to the handler getting involved to chase the allosaurus off so they could tend to red

Even in a weakened state, Brooklyn was able to get a glimpse of this strange raptor lady who, in a panic, tried saving one of her animals from harm way, completely forgetting about the mission at hand.

So with no body found and the allosaurus running off, the handler assumed Brooklyn was dead. So focused on getting medical attention for her dinosaur. With the nature of the dinosaurs' injury, it possible that red wasn't ready for any field mission so was left to rest during the events of chaos theory.

With all this mind, when it revealed that Brooklyn was a part of a dino eco terrorist group. At some point when these characters properly meet, I do think with her previous experience with the handler, she will try to appeal to the handler more caring side for the raptors to join the eco terrorist. Causing one of two things

1) the handler will get a semi redemption arc, working with Brooklyn to help the dinosaurs

2) Create a bigger monster with the handler going solo, creating mayhem with her raptors and maybe some other trained dinosaurs that she might have access to. Gaining a vendetta against all humans, especially to those who are cruel to the dinosaurs

#jurassic world chaos theory #dreamworks #chaos theory #jurassic world #jwct #jwcc

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genericpuff · 2 years ago

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The Mishandling of LO's S3 Midseason Hiatus - Part 1

So Lore Olympus' return is right around the corner, and I realize I've never actually talked about the S3 midseason finale. I think I said I was going to, but then I just sorta didn't, probably because I was still reeling in the absolute absurdity of it for weeks afterwards. In hindsight, I should have written about it back when it was still fresh, but I feel like I can do it just as much - if not more - justice writing about them in hindsight, now that they've had time to sit and I've seen what Rachel and WT are clearly planning to do after the comic ends (whether or not they succeed... that's a different story).

CAUTION: THIS IS PART 1 OF A 3 PART SERIES IN WHICH I WILL BE SPOILING MUCH OF EPISODES 251-253. THIS EPISODE CONTAINS DEPICTIONS OF VIOLENCE INVOLVING STRANGULATION. THIS WILL BE A LONG POST. BRACE YOURSELF.

So one of the things that really motivated me to finally talk about this was a conversation that happened recently in the ULO Discord - the realization that there are many readers who still don't know what happened after the free to read finale cliffhanger.

Y'know, the one where Hades gets possessed by Kronos and attempts to choke Persephone-

Now, awful dark jokes aside about how Persephone frankly deserves to have her balloon head popped, this was a wild cliffhanger to leave on for free readers, but the strange thing this time around - unlike with the previous midseason hiatus - is that this is where the cliffhanger has stood for free readers for the past 3 months, and it will be 4 months by the time the series returns.

And frankly... this just highlights a huge problem with LO's writing, because this cliffhanger? Like all the others, it's literally resolved within the next episode. The one that's currently under the FP lock.

Man, isn't it a little fucked up that we only ever get trigger warnings when it's concerning Persephone? Where was the warning for when Minthe got turned into a plant? Where was the warning for the entire episode that depicted Hera's trauma from Kronos and how it's still affecting her in the present? It's always either the Persephone, Hades, or Apollo focused episodes that get the trigger warnings, they couldn't care less about the violence being done onto other people in the story.

Anyways. Episode 251 opens up by reminding us, oh yeah, Kassandra exists!

Remember back in Episode 227 when Psyche stole Apollo's USB drive (and by "stole", I mean she picked it up off the ground where Apollo had conveniently dropped it?) And they found a folder with a picture of Kassandra? Well, Episode 251 opens by reminding us of her... 24 episodes later. SEVEN MONTHS OF REAL LIFE TIME, LITERALLY THE LENGTH OF BOTH THE SEASON 2 AND SEASON 3 MIDSEASON HIATUSES COMBINED-

Anyways, I guess Rachel finally figured out what she was gonna do with Kassandra after all that time, and it's... really stupid.

But wait, don't worry about that yet, because only the comic's opening reminds us of Kassandra, we gotta establish the title first and get back to that cliffhanger from before, the one that free to read users have been waiting 4 months to see.

(pay attention to the episode titles here btw, it's probably one of Rachel's lamest 3 parter title sequences yet)

Turns out Kronos is still intent on getting his hands on Hera, even though we've literally already seen Kronos haunting Hera. Is he just a ghost? A hallucination of her traumatized mind? We don't know, it never really explains itself. So Kronos is still looking for Hera.

(kinda weird that we're getting all these redrawn fullbody angles of Hades-possessed-by-Kronos choking his noodle-bodied wife who is doing literally NOTHING to actually fight back besides yelling at him, but okay.)

Turns out Hades isn't really hyped about this choking game going on between his dad and his niece wife, so he goes full on "release the beast" Naruto mode on his ass.

And that's it. That's literally the conflict resolved. The cliffhanger that free to read users were left with over the 4 month hiatus is resolved literally within a handful of panels and Hades just "believing enough" to save his wife.

And then that's just it, it cuts away, and we get this sorta awkward conversation between Persephone and Hades (now himself again) over the fact that he just choked out his wife.

The scene transitions to Hades waking up in his bed (literally that last shot of him and Persephone was it, it transitions immediately). I'm trying not to use up Tumblr's 30 image posting limit so I'm not posting the 3 fucking copy pasted panels of this that just involves Hades waking up, use your imagination lmao

There's literally no actual conversation here, no amount of Hades asking "what happened", somehow despite his possessed state he remembers everything so succinctly that he jumps right to demanding Persephone to see her neck.

(literally removed the panel of Persephone saying "Hades..." because these types of "let me do the thing" "Hades :(((" "let me do the thing" exchanges are literally just Rachel trying to hit her panel limit, once you start seeing these '3 panel' exchanges that copy paste the same shit over and over again, you can't unsee them and you realize this is why so little happens in the comic as a whole, because it's just constant repetition of dialogue and reaction panels to pad out the episodes).

And then we get what I like to call "guy in a position of power manipulating his more vulnerable partner into pitying him without actually apologizing":

No for real, I didn't cut out a single thing from this exchange aside from a couple copy pasted reaction panels, this is the entire conversation. Hades doesn't apologize, he doesn't ask Persephone if she's okay, he just pulls the "you can leave if you want toooo :(((" baiting Persephone into further trapping herself with this jackass. SHE'S the one who's stuck with HIM.

Like, obviously Hades wasn't the one who choked her, that goes to Kronos, but he doesn't even ask her if she's okay. He just looks at her moldy ass bruises and immediately goes "YOU CAN LEAVE IF YOU WANT TO I'M A MONSTER OH GOD-" and then of course she's having to comfort him which is fine but where's the balance? It's always Persephone having to comfort him and listen to his trauma and we never get Hades doing the same for her - the times we do get Persephone talking about her trauma and struggles with him, he always finds a way to make it about him.

Hades proceeds to talk more about his childhood and more of the shit he's already talked about multiple times before, I don't even need to go over it at this point.

That said, Rachel does remember to bring his stutter back. When's the last time he stuttered? 200 episodes ago ?? (literally I don't remember, it's like when he used to twist his napkins, he doesn't have these character traits consistently anymore).

THERE we go, finally some semblance of an apology. It came after more trauma dumping, but at least it's something-

Oh for fuck's sakes.

This is literally such generic "you've come so far!" motivational jargon. And it's made even worse in LO because what has Hades overcome exactly? Just a reminder, here are the things we've seen in Hades' backstory since he was rescued by his brothers:

He started a business in the Underworld that he's been operating with slave labor and profiting off ever since as a tyrannical oligarch

He entered a multi-century-long affair with his brother's wife, his own sister in law

He cost Demeter - Persephone's own mother - the role of Queen of the Mortal Realm and Persephone still does not know this.

He abused and neglected his adopted son - who was literally abandoned on his doorstep - for hundreds of years and used his role as his adopted father to guilt trip his son for getting "special treatment".

He never took responsibility for the financially dependent relationship he created between himself and a lower class nymph and tried to bribe her out of his life as soon as he fell for a 19 year old intern

HE LITERALLY FELL FOR THE 19 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER OF A WOMAN WHO HE HAD SCREWED OVER AND PRETENDED LIKE THAT WOMAN WAS IN THE WRONG FOR NOT APPROACHING HIM DURING THE EVENTS OF THE ACT OF WRATH, AND THEN HE HAD THE GALL TO PROPOSE TO HER DAUGHTER RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER WHEN SHE BASICALLY HAD NO OTHER CHOICE BUT TO SAY YES.

Everything he's legitimately had to overcome involving his trauma has gone completely ignored until pop in comes the pink cinnamon roll girl to solve all his problems and do for him what apparently even a therapist couldn't do (because haha he thinks his therapist is a hack.)

Persephone saying "look at all you've done" should be a reminder of all the crimes Hades has committed against people weaker than him, but instead it's used as a term of endearment, because Persephone literally got with him when she was 19 years old. And apparently the whole "eternally 19" thing applies to more than just her body, because even now, 10 years later, she's still lacking all the smarts and self-awareness and maturity to realize marrying this man was a mistake.

At this point Persephone isn't too naive or stupid to realize what she's gotten herself into, she's just a terrible person who's entirely complacent in Hades' bullshit and frankly, they deserve each other.

They literally keep talking about him for several more panels. Hades literally whines on and on about how much of a failure he is, how he feels like he failed the child who's trapped in Tartarus, and then of course Persephone tells him "no honey, you're the most important being in this process!" and she's LITERALLY STILL JUST TALKING ABOUT HIM, THIS WHOLE EPISODE IS PERSEPHONE TALKING ABOUT HOW WONDERFUL HADES IS, NOTHING ELSE HAPPENS. HAVE YOU NOTICED WE HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN KASSANDRA YET ?? HAVE YOU NOTICED THE COLD OPEN FOR THE EPISODE HASN'T BECOME RELEVANT YET ?? I'VE ALREADY HIT THE 30 IMAGE LIMIT AND I HAVE TO START CUTTING STUFF OUT-

Persephone and Hades talk about how they should name the interloper, but they don't come up with anything before transitioning to Leuce and Thetis.

And y'all, this has gotta be one of Rachel's worst cases of backpedaling in the entire series. You thought how she turned Leuce - Hades' first wife - into a homewrecker was bad? You thought it was absurd the plot tried to turn Leuce into Minthe 2.0?

Remember those text messages that Leuce and Hades sent between each other? The ones we never saw but kept getting alluded to? Well of course we couldn't have Hades actually text Leuce during Persephone's banishment, because then that would mean he isn't 100% loyal to his little pink cinnamon roll "qween", so what was the next best thing? Kronos possessing Hades and texting Leuce like so many people - even fans - assumed? No. It's worse.

The text messages... weren't real.

This literally makes no sense. First of all, it's once again Rachel creating drama out of "haha woman delusional!" much like she did with Minthe. But second, it literally doesn't make sense after what we've seen leading up to this.

Leuce didn't just talk about Hades texting her. She went to his office, intent on seducing him, with the knowledge of these text messages being real. She even TALKS ABOUT THESE MESSAGES WITH HADES.

But of course, they were interrupted before Hades got a chance to respond, so this was convenient enough for Rachel to try and pull off some 'twist' where she could easily absolve Hades of "cheating" on Persephone (again, the girl he only knew for like 1-2 months) but also not have to deal with the weird logic of Kronos possessing Hades just to text some random nymph.

This is absolutely one of the most absurd retcons Rachel has ever tried to pull to get herself out of the corners she writes herself into.

Now the episode is still going and FINALLY, it gets to Kassandra, after teasing her at the beginning of the episode and proceeding to do a whole lot of nothing throughout the entire thing.

This has to be one of the funniest panels in the entire comic, bar none. Rachel's gotten worse at drawing men despite making this comic for 5 years and having plenty of opportunity to improve, and he literally just looks like the fucking Amazing Bulk, haunting this poor mortal woman with his very presence.

So yeah, it turns out that the "curse" Kassandra suffers from in this "retelling" is, rather than having prophecies no one believes (or at least, if she does, we don't see that), she sees Apollo and no one believes her. Again, Rachel takes these weird liberties with the original myths that don't make a whole lot of sense all for the sake of seeming original, but whatever, Rachel hit her panel limit for the week, because that's essentially where the episode ends, with Apollo greeting Kassandra. As quickly as it was shown at the beginning of the episode, the one part of the episode actually featuring Kassandra is wrapped up in literally 7 panels.

THOUGHT VOMIT TIME

So with Episode 251 now summarized and out of the way, I really wanna talk about how this episode operates as the first FP episode after the midseason finale for free readers.

Despite the fact that it was a 4 month break and despite the fact that WT has always still released these episodes for free on schedule - with the idea that every reader will be up to date with the current content and can start fresh with a new set of FP episodes when it returns - this time around Episodes 251-253 have remained locked.

And I say Webtoons specifically because as far as I know, the creators typically don't have control over this type of decision. From what I've heard from other Originals creators, it's often WT who decides shit like coin costs, FP release dates, etc. This is why during hiatuses the numbers on the episode unlocks never actually align with their real return dates, sometimes they completely undershoot and reset, sometimes they overshoot and tell people LO is coming back in January despite the fact it's been confirmed it's coming back in November. This isn't Rachel's doing. It's clearly Webtoons trying to squeeze as much money out of this series as they can so they think the 4 month hiatus will motivate people to pay... but even the newest episode is still only sitting at 17.9k likes, which is just slightly above the average amount the FP episodes normally wind up sitting at by the time they're unlocked after 3 weeks, but this has been after four months. The hiatus of the comic and its communities absolutely put LO out of sight, out of mind.

That said, I don't know what this means for the series' return, if it'll have 6 FP episode unlocks going forward or if it'll just return with one new FP episode and Episode 251 unlocking for free readers, but holy shit, if that's the case, this is gonna be a shitty way to return from 4 months of nothing. The cliffhanger from 250 implies so much more than what it ends up being and it's, again, highlighting a fundamental issue within LO - it operates purely on a week to week basis, producing episodes on the fly, and concerning itself more with filling up its panel quota so that it can get readers from beginning to end when they can drop some new cliffhanger that likely won't lead to anything or will be completely resolved within three swipes of the next episode. Season 3 has been especially egregious with this and it's clear Rachel has run out of track to run on.

There is speculation that perhaps the reason the timing of this cliffhanger is so off is because Rachel didn't know the hiatus was going to happen and WT forced her on it. That said, it's not something anyone can really confirm besides Rachel. I wouldn't blame her for taking the time she did considering she was attending both NYCC and SDCC this past summer, and it's hard enough for her to keep up with any sort of buffer to begin with, so those conventions would have definitely resulted in episodes getting postponed anyways.

What I'm really interested in seeing is the reception when the comic returns. Hiatuses like this are brutal for traffic, it's incredibly difficult to get every single person who you started the hiatus with to return after it's done. It's not uncommon for comics to come back to only a fraction of their readerbase - and that's where the marketing comes in.

S3's return has been incredibly undermarketed. I've talked about it already but I'll mention it again here - they have done nothing to hype up LO's remaining audience for the ending of LO. Not only has the fact that the comic is even entering its final part been mentioned on either Rachel's or WT's social media pages, but the fan groups have been shut down for almost the entirety of this hiatus, shutting fans away from discussing the comic, making predictions, and just participating in their most active and direct part of the fandom. This was an absolutely absurd decision on Rachel's part, I don't know if this was her trying to shield herself from criticism or if she genuinely just doesn't give a shit about her fanbase anymore, but it's not a good thing if the only active groups to be found online during a comic's hiatus - it's final hiatus before the series ends - are the critical ones. Fans of the comic should not have to find out about its ending from me. I know I've got a way with words, but it's not fair to the long-term fans of this comic that they're being shut out by the comic's own creator, simply because she either doesn't care or is just so afraid of the critics that she'd rather hurt her relationship with her fanbase by shutting them out just to maybe shut out any critics who are nearby.

I don't know what the reasoning is and I don't know how it could have been beneficial. But that leads us to the other theory, one that I can see as plausible-

I don't think Lore Olympus was supposed to end here.

We've talked about this theory before, but to reiterate - it's been speculated for a while (prior to the news at NYCC that the comic would be ending) that S3 of LO wasn't going to be the final season as so many people had been assuming based on past info. There was no indication or marketing implying this was the final season - meanwhile webtoons like City of Blank were marketing their final seasons from day 1 of the premiere - and there were loads of new plot threads being established in S3 that we knew couldn't possibly be wrapped up by the end of the season. Case in point, it took Rachel seven months to get back to Kassandra, and while during that time she's rushed plotlines that shouldn't have been rushed (the wedding) other plotlines have proceeded to drag at a snail's pace or been dropped altogether. The speculation that S3 wasn't going to be the final season was plausible.

But now, suddenly, LO is coming to an end, likely within the next 20-30 episodes, and neither Rachel or Webtoons have said a word about it. No announcement post, no hype, no promotional art, no statement from the Webtoons VP of what to be excited for (which he's done before). It seems like they're either intentionally trying to bury it to keep people from panicking while Rachel retreats into the shadows to hide from the crimes she's committed, or they're intentionally keeping the ending of the comic unannounced so they can backpedal on it later to generate hype over it "deciding to stick around". Chances are, it'll be based on how the return of the series goes, and whether or not it's able to get the performance numbers back in the green.

I do not think it will. As I said already, hiatuses are already notorious for destroying built up traffic, especially on Webtoons where people (many of whom are teenagers and children) are conditioned to expect regular content on a schedule. But there's one other thing that's been bugging me - there hasn't been a shred of promotional art. We're currently less than a month away from the return of LO and not only are Rachel and WT being incredibly hush hush about it, but all the art Rachel has put out has been largely on her Blue Sky, where she has the smallest following, and none of it is exactly indicative of being "promotional art", rather just random sketches and doodles that she's doing on her downtime. Everything else has been promos for her books, SDCC/NYCC, of course, Rachel Smythe Presents, her next venture which she has been hyping up more than the actual return or ending of the comic that made her famous in the first place.

At this point, I'm not even fully convinced she's even started working on the next episode yet, let alone any sort of buffer. If anything, she knows that she's coming back to the series with 3 episodes still locked under FastPass, so all she'll need to technically have ready for launch is one new episode. Rachel has never been good at building buffers, not even in the beginning when she apparently started off with 2-3 episodes of buffer. Even when her comic is nearing its end, she's not learning any lessons, she's not setting herself up for success. And I'm not setting myself up for the hope that the series could possibly come back any better than it was when it left - if anything, I think we're about to see Rachel and the comic outdo itself once again on how bad it can possibly be.

And we still have two more episodes to talk about, which includes the cliffhanger for FP readers that we've been waiting four months on. Part 2 and 3 of these FP episode analyses will be going up as soon as I can get them done, ideally I'll have all three parts done before it returns so we can start off fresh with the newest episode.

Buckle up folks. Pour yourself a drink. We're gonna need it.

#lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus #antiloreolympus #long post #essay post #tw violence #tw assault

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