#screaming into the void that is dating apps

[witchescollection]

literally why is dating so hard... where are the polyamorous pagans??? i know they exist!!

[swordsonnet]

.

[judasofsuburbia]

when renee rapp said "i just want some recognition for having good tits and a big heart"...... yeah</3

[nintendc64]

why is trying to form human connections as an adult just an impossible task. both reaching out to old friends and trying to make new ones. am I doing something wrong

[branches-in-a-flood]

Has anyone used the Her app recently?

Does it still suck?

Please gods help me I am dying here

[mybonesaremadeofstone]

Why my brain gotta be difficult? I wanna partner but I dont wanna go through dating/having a partner process. I just wanna be known and loved and know and love in return but like fuck dating.

[outerspacious]

It’s as if … these men don’t even want to talk to me

[seeveekat]

Why are people still weird about asexuals in the year 2023???

[chdarling]

Friends, we are there. We are at that point. ICE is abducting people off the streets and sending them to concentration camps in El Salvador. That is happening. Trump has said that he’d “love” to send the “homegrowns” to these prisons and told the president of El Salvador to build 5 more. Kilmar Abrego Garcia was kidnapped due to an "administrative error" and the Republican regime is refusing to bring him home, even though the Supreme Court ruled 9-0 that they must. A US citizen from Georgia was arrested in Florida for being an "unauthorized alien" and they refused to release him, even as his mother waved his birth certificate in their faces. (I just learned while making this post that he has now been released and reunited with his family, thank fucking god.) A hundred other horrors have happened that we don't even know about.

No one is coming to save us. We have to save us.

Please, please, please find a (peaceful!) protest this Saturday and attend if you are able. There are also protests planned for May 1. And, frankly, there should be protests every single day, but we have to build momentum and community for that. So let's start.

If you can’t attend a protest, please consider taking another form of action. I was depressed on the train this morning and brainstormed a very incomplete and unofficial list of Things You Can Do:

Print posters advertising the protests and put them up around your neighborhood, your school, your apartment mail room, public restrooms, anywhere.

Spread the word on social media, yes, but also text your family and friends and ask if they know about the 4/19 and 5/1 protests. This date is not getting the same publicity as 4/5 and people are reporting social media posts being suppressed. Direct communication is the most effective.

Call your representatives. The 5 Calls app makes it extremely easy, even if you have phone anxiety. If your reps, like mine, mostly have their voicemails shut down, email them instead. Resistbot makes it super simple. I know it feels like screaming into the void, but it does have an impact. And even if it turns out it doesn’t, it takes 2 minutes. Do it out of spite. Just do it.

Stop buying anything that’s not absolutely essential and start preparing yourself for a general strike. I don’t know that we will get enough of the population on board to do this, but it is our best hope, and each person that is prepared for it makes the reality of it happening a little more likely. If you can, aim to have food and supplies stocked for a few weeks. If you have the means, be extra prepared to help your neighbors. Talk to your friends about this. Start strategizing.

(Also, a note on that general strike website: I'm sharing it for info, but I know a lot of people don't want to sign their name to a strike card. I get it. You don't have to sign up for anything to get prepared for a strike. You don't have to sign up for anything to stop giving your money to this economy. You don't have to sign up for anything to strike, when the day comes. You don't even have to tell anyone. You can just do it.)

If you are financially able, donate to your local food pantry or mutual aid network. The Republican Regime is cutting funding to the food banks in advance of an economic crisis. We are only as strong as the most vulnerable among us. Help your neighbors! A general strike cannot happen without community solidarity. Start building that solidarity now.

Cancel any subscription you can. Especially Amazon. Fuck Amazon. And Target, and Walmart.

If you have to buy something, buy local. Support your community as much as possible. And hey, it's almost farmers market season, hell yeah!

Mask up!!! Do not throw disabled people under the bus in this movement. Wear a mask. It protects the most vulnerable among us, and it protects you. Not just from disease, but also facial recognition technology. And, you know, RFK Jr.

Stay alive. I am sure I’m not the only one who has plunged to new depths of despair over the past few months. Find something to cling to, even if it’s only spite (some days, that’s all I have). Please stay alive. We need you.

DO NOT GIVE INTO THE FEAR OF BEING CRINGE. Taking action in the face of fascism is cool as fuck and anyone who tells you otherwise is trapped in a prison of their own making and they will bring us all down. Do not get distracted by moral purity tests. Do not be afraid, do not be embarrassed. BE CRINGE, BE FREE.

And finally, most importantly, do not let perfect be the enemy of good. We can all only do the best we can under this oppressive capitalist hellscape we’re forced to endure. We're all struggling, we're all tired, we're all scared. Do not guilt yourself into despair and apathy if you have to buy groceries at a big box store or if you can't take off work for a protest because you'll lose your job/house/healthcare. This is the system. This is how it's designed. The important thing is to try. If you can't do one thing, find something else you can do. Little acts add up, and we are all in this together.* As my dad likes to remind me, no one can do everything, but everyone can do something.

Let's do something. <3

*yes I did start humming high school musical here

[cureazure]

Winx club video game headcanons because I thought about them in the shower and now I must share them with Tumblr

Bloom: absolutely plays games like HSR & Genshin and mains the dragon guys (dan heng, neuvi, etc.)

Stella: OBSESSED with Infinity Nikki, will pull all nighters playing it and then show to class extremely tired. She also 100%-ed Fashion Dreamer within one night and then went on a tyrade for a week due to how underwhelming it was

Flora: has dated every single npc in Stardew Valley, even the non-romancable ones (she probably got Tecna to hack the game for her...or maybe she just has that much rizz idk)

Tecna: downloaded the pokemon trading card game app not knowing anything about pokemon, got a really dogshit bidoof card, then proceeded to fall in love with bidoof and crush any mortals foolish enough to challenge them and their mighty bidoof (they would find a way to destroy everyone using one of the shittiest cards in the game)

Musa & Aisha: play extremely difficult rhythm games and proceed to trip over each other and end up in a big pile on the floor (before making out)

Roxy: has hacked Animal Crossing: New Horizons so that she not only has multiple islands but also raised the villager limit so that she can obtain every single villager in the game (except the ugly ones she absolutely hits the ugly ones with flynets as Flora begs for her to stop [she doesn't]) (she did not need tecnas help to do this, she could probably hack elon musk's bank account and use his money to buy million dollar commissions of her fursona)

Darcy: plays dating sims to fill the void left by riven (will furiously deny this)

Stormy: plays GTA and breaks literally every law just because she can. Also if the other trix ever somehow convince her to play a horror game she would absolutely scream as loud as she can at the first, teeny-tiniest jumpscare.

Icy: also plays GTA, recreates 9/11, and then proceeds to stop at a red light whilst being gunned down by the military. Has also played every single horror game you can think of and hasn't flinched even once.

Darkar: has no idea what video games are, decides to entertain the idea of them and decides on a tamagotchi. He then neglects the shit out of it and laughs gleefully as they die.

Valtor: has zero interest in video games, only plays genshin impact so that he can join Bloom's world, steal all her resources and hit her with the Kaveh glitch / ruin & break her world before peacing out

Sky: plays Fortnite...enough said

Brandon: Has a million tamagotchi's, pou's, and everything in between, and does a very good job at taking care of them. When they inevitably die, he spirals into a one-day depression, skips class for said day, and plans a highly detailed military funeral for them before solemnly burying them in a shoebox he keeps under his bed (He gets Stella to sing at every funeral, and he does this everytime one of them dies)

Timmy: also plays the pokemon trading card game app but has the most horseshit powerful cards in the game. If there was ever a duo's option (idk if there is I don't play the pokemon tcg app), everyone would just immediately forfeit because they know their weak mortal asses cannot defeat the most powerful legendary cards in the game...and Bidoof.

Riven: plays animal crossing and fashion dreamer at 1am, and everytime he hears movement within the dorms he starts sweating bullets. If he's ever caught he will vehemently deny it.

Helia: Plays Yazuka or some other extremelt violent game. idk I just like the complete whiplash/dissonance of the sweet, gentle poet boyfriend playing the most violent games known to magix.

Nabu: iPad baby but in the Gen X Wordscapes-block blast way

[transgenderbuffoonery]

i hate being lonely it genuinely brings out the worst in me

[imyourbratzdoll]

𝒖𝒏𝒘𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒅

this is the more extended version of my unwanted drabble, thank you to @jessybarnes for some of the ideas. I hope you all enjoy.

summary - steve tricked you before kidnapping you, leaving you locked away in the basement as you begin to mess with his mind.

warning - angst, mentions of killing, mentions of sadness, mentions of being trapped.

the gif and headers I use aren't mine.

Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.

“What? You want me to meow or something?” 

Steve sat there shocked, staring at you with wonder. It’s as if you had no care and weren’t freaking out like others. He stares into your eyes, seeing nothing there, and his head tilts as he looks at you. “No..?” He looks confused, wondering. “How do you feel?” 

“I don’t.” You state, turning your head back to the wall and staring at it. You miss how his eyebrows shoot up. “So… When are you going to kill me?” You pick at your nails, continuing to feel stupid for thinking someone like him would actually want you. You turn your head when you don’t hear a response and tilt your head as he stares at you, confused. “That’s why you tricked me, right? To kill me, you didn’t exactly pretend to like me, drug me, and tie me up in your basement because you’re madly in love with me, and that’s the only way you thought you could get me.” 

“You’re not afraid? Why aren’t you screaming, crying or swearing at me?” He’s so confused, getting closer to you, kneeling before you as he looks into your eyes. “Why is there nothing? You’re so empty.” 

You blink, staring at him blankly. “If you don’t mind, ‘Steve’. I would like not to talk and for you to just get to the point.” You move away from him, crawling up the bed and lying on your back as you stare at the ceiling. “I’ll be here… Waiting patiently for my death. Not like I have anywhere to go.” 

You let out a sigh when he left the room, one side of your mind begging for him to stay and the other staying quiet. You couldn’t let yourself fall for his stupid face again, and you didn’t want to beg someone to love you. You wanted that to come naturally. But you don’t think that will ever happen because… You were you, and people didn’t like what they saw.

Steve was curious, and you were like a puzzle to him. He had never met anyone so void of emotion and missed the woman he met. You seemed so happy and carefree, sure. He did notice that you were more closed off and didn’t seem to let him so close. He wanted to change that. He needed some sort of reaction, some sort of emotion. How can you be so calm during all this? Steve left you alone for a while, barely acknowledging the other women locked up, barely acknowledging his wife and kids, or the women he promised dates to. You were occupying his mind, and it was driving him crazy. He had destroyed most of the upstairs, trying anything to get you out of his head. He couldn’t take it. The look in your eyes, your words, it was all getting to him.

Steve remembered your dates and how you told him about the books you used to write. He recalled that you said it was the only thing that made you genuinely feel something, and an idea sparked. Steve gathered a notebook, some pens, and some food and water before making his way down to the basement. He knocks on the door before sliding it open and smiling at you. “I brought you something that I think you’ll enjoy.” You continue to stare at the wall, your eyes tired. Steve sighs, softly walking over and placing the items before you. “I’m trusting you with these pens, but if you do something—”

“You’ll what? Kill me?” You scoff, eyes slowly moving to connect with his. “That was already your plan, and this would make the killing go faster.” You roll your eyes, barely looking at the things he placed before you. “Did you need anything else? Because I’d rather you just hurry this along.” Your head turns again, ignoring him because what was the point of giving him any more attention? 

“Why are you behaving like this? I bought you some of the things I remember you talked about. You should at least feel happy?” Your head falls back as you let out a laugh, startling Steve, who stares at you as if you’ve grown three heads. “What? What’s so funny?!” Why wouldn’t you just submit?! Why were you so different from the others?! It bewildered Steve how you could sit so emotionless and then laugh as if he had said something funny.

“You. Do you think giving me a notebook and pens would suddenly make me happy? Did you not stop to think that you are the problem? I have already come to terms with the fact that no one will ever love me, that you only pretended so you could kidnap me and kill me. So why aren’t you killing me?! Why are you taking your sweet time?!” You snap, struggling against the chains as you stand and move toward Steve, punching his chest. “Kill me! Kill me, goddammit!” You scream, your eyes are still emotionless, yet your words hold so much power.

Steve holds your wrists, stopping you from hitting him. He stares down at you, wondering why his heart clenches like this. “No.” He moves away, needing to get out of this room and get away from you as you make his head fuzzy. He watches as you stare at him in disbelief.

“So, what… I’m not good enough to love and not good enough to kill either?” You sink back onto the bed, your eyes staring at the wall as you realise you will never be good enough for anything or anyone. Steve quickly leaves the room, going through the house, destroying more things on the way. How could you get into his head like this? No one else had done it, so why were you so different?

You sat there, staring at the untouched notebook before slowly reaching for it, and as you grabbed the pen, the words began to flow out of you and onto the page. Everything you felt deep inside was coming out through stories. Not feeling in the mood to eat or drink, you spend most of the day and night writing. As many more days pass, Steve comes in and out with more gifts and food. You continued to ignore him, not knowing how to react, waiting for him to decide when it was your time to die finally. But the day never came. You think a month had passed, but you weren’t so sure. Steve walked into your room, undoing the chains and holding out his hand. “C’mon. I’ve prepared us some dinner.” You stare at him warily before slowly standing and following him. He leads you to the kitchen and pulls out the chair for you. 

“Why am I out here?” You sit, tapping the table, watching him place the food onto the plates, not daring to touch it as Steve sits across from you. 

“I’ve come to realise something, and at first, it scared me. You’re different from the rest.” You scoff, rolling your eyes. “I’m serious. Do you know how confusing this is for me? You’ve taken over my mind, and I can’t focus on anything else.” 

“Oh, I’m so sorry that I’ve stopped you from tricking other women into believing you love them.” Your eyes roll again, leaning back into the chair. “Do you need a tissue?” You pick up the napkin beside your plate, offering it out to him.

Steve stares at you blankly, his eye twitching as he’s stuck between wanting to strangle you and make love to you. “No, I do not need a tissue. I’m trying to tell you that I feel something for you.” He’s startled again as you laugh.

“You feel something for me?” You feel tears prick your eyes as you continue to laugh. “Oh, god. That’s probably the funniest thing I’ve heard. I think you are delusional.” You shake your head, and your laughter slowly dies down. Your eyes connect with him, and you stare. “You’ve already got me here. You don’t need to keep lying to make yourself feel better.” You continue to tap on the table. “So… When am I going to die?” 

“You aren’t. I’m keeping you alive.”

“Oh, great. Fantastic. Sounds so fun to be alive and kept locked away in a basement for the rest of my life. Good plan.” You give a little clap and throw him a fake smile. But deep down, your stomach twisted, and your heart dropped. This was worse than waiting to die. Now you would be locked away, unloved, and eventually wither away. Your expression on the outside stayed void of any emotion. 

“No, you will stay up here. With me.” 

You wished you had never even gone to that stupid market. You wished you had never believed Steve’s stupid words or smile. How could you be so stupid to believe someone would ever choose you?

You were unwanted.

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

[anjuschiffer]

The Void You Left Behind

For @official-timari-server event: Shutterbug Station 2024

Prompt: Dwelling

-

Tags: @toodaloo-kangaroo @vixen-uchiha

-

A03

When was the last time I was here? Luka found himself asking himself as he turned the key to their apartment. 

Was it after the funeral? 

Or a few days after? 

Was it when he let Alya clean the apartment?

He couldn’t quite remember, but even so, he stepped in.

Why was it so dark in here? And cold? Wasn’t it always nice and warm?

Maybe it was because he hadn’t been here in a while. Yeah, that had to be it.

He probably remembered it wrong.

Luka kicked his shoes at the entrance, stumbling over one as he stepped further into their apartment. He cursed it as he let his bag drop to the floor, listening as the thud echoed out into the kitchen.

It was only then that he realized that he was probably going to have to order take out. After all, he wasn’t greeted by the usual aroma of freshly baked bread he would often smell upon opening the apartment. He stared at the barren counter and unused stove.

“Luka! Welcome back!”

For once, Luka saw the kitchen tidy and sparkling clean. Something he rarely saw in their five years of residing in their apartment.

Usually, he’d see the occasional pot or pan on the counter or on the stove. Some days it was a pastry on the counter cooling off or a plate of food waiting for him. There were days where he saw a timer and scattered recipes on the counter followed by a yell telling him to check the stove or oven.

“Luka! Can you taste the soup?”

His stomach growled, signaling him to hurry up with the ordering. So he made his way to their couch to be able to think about his possible decisions for dinner.

As he made his way over, he could hear each and every step he took with clarity, hating that his socks didn’t muffle it one bit. 

He plopped himself onto the couch, quickly opening up his phone and scrolling through apps to see what he wanted to order. He felt the couch dip next to him, a smile curling on his lips as he felt something warm lean into him.

“Hey Mari, want any-” Luka stopped himself when he realized no one actually sat next to him, feeling his throat close up at the realization.

With his hunger long gone, he decided to just watch something on the tv when he realized that the remote wasn’t on the coffee table where it usually rested…on top of the coaster Mari made when they first moved into the apartment.

Luka picked up the crocheted coaster, chuckling at the uneven stitching and obvious mistakes she did while trying to make the round edges of the flower.

“Must you keep reminding me of your absence?” He whispered to himself, laying the coaster back onto the table as he got up, barely registering the answering machine that went off in the kitchen.

“-it’s Tim…just wanted to let you know…if you can’t stay the night, you know you can always stay with us again, okay? Just…call me when you can…okay? ”

He walked past barren walls that were once covered with their wedding photos and photos of their many dates. Photos of their friends and miscellaneous trinkets they would buy while they traveled the world. Photos that were now stored in their guest room that was probably thickly coated in dust.

Getting closer to their room, he swore he heard a voice coming from it, only to find no one there.

Instead, something shiny caught his attention thanks to the small crack of light that made its way through the curtains, causing a reflection to bounce off the metallic item laying on their bed.

He approached it, his throat completely closing up as he picked it up.

Her wedding ring.

The same ring she wore the day she died in the car accident.

The ring that matched his own.

A ring that was the pair to the one he never took off ever since they got married seven years ago. 

A ring that once symbolized their promise to each other.

“Til death do us part.” Luka croaked out, feeling his knees give out. 

He screamed into the bed sheets, gripping at them as he finally let out everything he had been bottling up all this time.

He didn’t know how long he had screamed and cried for, but he knew it was for a while.

His eyes felt heavy as he stared at the ring in front of his feet, laughing back at him as he pulled the comforter closer to his skin.

Despite its looks, the comforter felt cold against his skin. It did not comfort him in any way; it felt nothing like Marinette’s warm embraces. 

Something he had to learn to live without…

A life without Mari…

He slowly closed his eyes, the quietness of the apartment lulling him to sleep.

He hoped he would never wake up…

[yuu-kumeii]

˚₊‧꒰ა Let's Cherish Every Moment We Spend Together ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

┈ ⋞ 〈 FIRST OF ALL . . . 〉 ⋟ ┈

ೃ⁀➷ I'D LIKE TO THANK EVERYONE ᰔᩚ

╰┈➤ For reading my works and following me ❣ Honestly, I never thought I'd get this many followers ❀(*´▽`*)❀ Definitely thought I'd be screaming my headcanons and ideas into the void... But ever since I wrote those first 3 pieces, the amount of attention they got was way bigger than I thought it'd be Σ(゜゜) and while I know that ideas like my kiss-o-meter fic were one in a million, I hope you guys can stick around for the other 19237 ideas I have ˙˚ʚ(´◡`)ɞ˚˙

ೃ⁀➷ THANKS ESPECIALLY TO MY MUTUALS 𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

╰┈➤ Even if I don't say it often (or at all for that matter) I hope you know that I genuinely appreciate you guys for being my friend on this little app I downloaded on a whim (* ´ω` *) I'll try my best to interact with you guys more and send random asks just to have a chat if you'd have me ❣ Love you guys and I hope we can get to know each other a little more each day ♡

┈ ⋞ 〈 NOW THE REAL SHOW STARTS . . .〉 ⋟ ┈

ೃ⁀➷ WELCOME ONE AND ALL, TO A PLACE WHERE NO SCENARIO IS MERE FANTASY

╰┈➤ In this realm, you will be able to live out the moments you've always dreamed of! Loving a prince? Sharing stories over an enchanted tea party? Whatever you imagine, it will play out right here with you as the protagonist ᰔᩚ

╰┈➤ THE RULES OF THIS REALM ARE LAID OUT AS FOLLOWS...

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ THIS EVENT WILL LAST UNTIL DECEMBER 25TH, ANY REQUESTS MADE AFTER THE END DATE WILL NOT BE WRITTEN!

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ Finding the magic in the mundane is our theme this time, though this may change the next time the realm opens up ❣

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ Feel free to pick out any combination of prompts from the lists provided!

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ Don't forget to state which character you'd like to be your male lead ♡

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ If you can, please be more descriptive in your request to make things easier for our playwright

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ Although my usual rules apply, they might be a little more lenient for this event

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ Not all scenarios will be available on the lists so if you have an idea that is similar to the theme, feel free to add them in your request to see if it's acceptable!

‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎❥ Example of a request, "Hi there! Can I request Kenma + 3 for prompt + 17 for au with fem reader?"

┈ ⋞ 〈 TAKE YOUR PICK . . .〉 ⋟ ┈

ೃ⁀➷ AU LIST

╰┈➤ Pick and choose the world around you! What jobs would you have? What relationships do you foster? Where do you find one another? So many questions...!

ೃ⁀➷ PROMPT LIST (QUOTES AND IDEAS)

╰┈➤ Get as crafty as you'd like dear audience, there's so many ways you can turn your relationship upside down! Or would you rather it be on the right side up? Your choice!

ೃ⁀➷ A SPECIAL TREAT (SIMPLE DRAWING REQUESTS)

╰┈➤ Your creations are your greatest treasures and they are all your own! Any original characters you have could be brought to life, if you'd let this humble costume designer do so...

Again, thank you so much to everyone for helping me reach this 300 follower milestone! This one's for all of you, so please enjoy!

[vincentvan-ohno]

I’m just gonna scream into the void rq since my text posts get no notes

You can read if you want or don’t idc

Aside from the part about an ex Sabrina Carpenter wrote Sharpest Tool specifically for me.

I deleted my sad breakup playlist from ages ago and I’m genuinely too avoidant to make a new one

Having a breakup (twice) with someone who you were never dating and you’ve never even got to be in a relationship (ever in your life) is crazy

Breaking up with someone and being devastated while none of your friends liked him so they’re lowkey happy is crazy because I just wanna be upset and sad but I just end up defending him instead.

My sister made the joke that he’s gonna come back and be desperate to be with me (this keeps happening to me when I turn down a man) and if he does I might crash out.

Him asking me what changed to make me fall in love with him (there was more context involving the fact he has become more distant lately due to unrelated things) made me want to tear the paint off my walls because we’d been talking daily for 3 years.

I’m mad that it feels like all my emotions are separated from my body by a glass wall. I think it may be autism but I’m not diagnosed yet.

I’m gonna crash out that everyone on dating apps is either ugly, a conservative, wants to hike/workout w/ me, and or loves traveling.

I hate that I still feel hyperfixated on him

I’m actually gonna institutionalize myself if I think about the fact I’m devastated and idk if he even notices the difference between what we were and now that we’re taking space and trying to be just friends. He might even like it better, I need to be lobotomized

If he asked me out I’d still say yes. Bc my only issue fr is that he doesn’t like me as much as i like him.

My best friend still refuses to accept that he’s conventionally attractive (he is!)

3/29

I’m gonna crash out I miss him so bad. We’re trying to be friends but it feels like we’ve just gone super low contact and idk if that’s good or bad. I miss talking to him daily.

I feel like the “somebody sedate me” clip

[my-heart-is-made-of-glass]

I fucking hate dating apps

Doesnt matter what I do, literally zero matches likes etc from anything or anyone except prn bots and like fine if thats something people like but for once in my life id like to have a connection with a person and maybe be able to talk to people past screaming into the tumblr void