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#scary diva
bitter69uk · 22 days
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“The one thing I don't think I could live without would be the soundtracks to horror films,'' she said. ''I love to play them in my car as I drive down the freeway.'' Miss Galas sees no contradiction in that she is as fond of grade-B horror movies and of the heavy-metal rock of AC/DC as she is of Verdi and her vocal idol, Maria Callas.”
/ From a 1985 New York Times profile of Diamanda Galas /
Don’t let the resemblance to Morticia Addams fool you - Diamanda Galas has SOUL! The fierce Greek American avant-garde diva, pianist, performance artist and AIDS activist (who was born on 29 August 1955, turning 69 today) convincingly styles herself as an Angel of Death. Once memorably described by The New Yorker as “lounge singer in a world on fire”, she wields her remarkable bird-of-prey voice like a weapon and possesses the same kind of wraith-cheekboned, raven-haired beauty Walt Disney endowed his animated evil queen stepmothers with. Galas got her first break singing in front of insane asylum inmates, has paid tribute to Aileen Wuornos and in performance is apt to take the stage stripped to the waist and smeared in blood. Appropriately, director Francis Ford Coppola enlisted her to provide eerie shrieks and gasps for the sound effects in his 1992 version of Dracula. I haven’t seen Galas perform in years, but I vividly remember the last time: she was reinterpreting jazz standards like “All of Me” and “You Don’t Know What Love Is” in her own inimitable (blood-curdling) way, which lulled the uninitiated into a false sense of security. People were filing out in dismay all night! Keep doing what you’re doing, lady! (If you’ve never dipped a toe into Galas’ oeuvre, start with her spine-tingling interpretations of “I Put a Spell on You”, The Supremes' “My World is Empty Without You” or Johnny Cash’s “25 Minutes to Go").
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faggotdads · 1 month
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doodles, doodles, & more doodles
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simm-mouse · 9 months
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Smoochin at the new years party😘😘
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Speaking of Cash Monet and Louie Bricks, they're just over this open secret of a relationship
Also, here's a doodle of Scary Mary for @simstraffikcone! She's one of my favorites too
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kitschykitschykoo · 10 months
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Kurt Barlow, Salem's lot...even in death he loved a boogie...
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🍭🍭FLAPPIN'JACK FLASH🍭🍭
A brief on Clara's beloved Pegasus. U v U
He is a showoff. When lots of people are watching, he will strut or fly around like he owns the place. He likes to sprint and jet around, and Clara swears he will look at you like, "I'm the fastest Pegasus in the world!"
When there are only a few people, or he is only around other pegasi or horses, he'll act like he isn't paid enough to listen to you. He will decide in 5 seconds if he likes you riding him or not, and if not, he will DRAMATICALLY send you flying. Naturally, the exception is Clara, with whom he has bonded.
He is too clever for his own good. Clara has to distract him when letting him out of the stable now because before, he watched her undo the lock so many times he figured it out himself and kept escaping. They had to design new locks and everything.
He loves treats and being brushed. You will brush him until he is satisfied. Otherwise, he will nudge you. He is ok with other animals, if they show proper deference! He doesn't like mice, though. They are too little and too fast. What is up with those guys? He also HATES BATHS. Bathing is a huge production.
He likes attention. Like a certain human we know, he will do things he knows he's not supposed to do, like run off with feed buckets, if he feels he is being ignored.
Clara is a princess but Flappin' Jack Flash thinks he is the king lol
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baku-usagi · 8 months
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Being a woman is literally so frustrating and scary.
I wish everyday I wasn't born a woman, and not in a trans dysphoria way but in a I am constantly in pain and have medical issues that come back unstudied women's reproductive health issues.
My period had been going on longer then usual and heavier then usual.. I've felt sick and fatigued. It runs in the family. My mom had issues too.
I don't have Insurance or a ton of money so I wouldnt even know where to begin for a diagnosis.
Could be endometriosis or uterine fibroids.
But looking stuff up hasn't helped. I'm tired, nauseated and scared. God I'm so scared. I don't know what my body is doing or why. I don't know how to get help and I can't find anything online that isn't 'drink more water and don't be fat!"
I hate it.
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NO RIGHT like I was thinking about that the other day too and Surely Jo does not have a particularly rich inner life... I love that scenario with Ichi dearly though!
But while I was going through times I'd mentioned my dreams earlier, I saw I'd once dreamt that Jo was an avid rhythm gamer lmao
I'd pay an inappropriate amount of money to watch Jo fuck it up on DDR PLEASE that sounds like Such A Dream ☠️☠️
#snap chats#please thats just enabling my silly brain...#it does not help that before i went home for the summer i went to an arcade and all /i/ did was play rhythm games...#i can only imagine ichi's spending time at the arcade when he should Probably be on the clock (time doesnt exist in arcades its proven fact#and jo just cant reach him via phone so... he gotta come down in person....#cue aforementioned What Do YOU Do For Fun Then Huh conversation#but now theres a twist brother like. idk HOW we're getting him on the ddr machine but we are#PLEASE ichi just gambles that if jo can get X score he'll swear off the arcade for a month#obvi he doesnt think he can do it but then he sees jo pick Master Mode without much argument and ichis just 👁️👁️????#just kills it first try no fucks ups or anything first try 😭😭#HE COULD FUCK IT UP ON TAIKO what are taiko drums if not arnis sticks. sure. he's trained in western martial arts but we can get creative#i'd lose it if he played project diva.....#scary man's so focused and so serious and its cause he's playing the miku game.....#i know jo can clear through the fire and the flames. child's play. busted fingers and all#NOOO WHAT'S THAAAATT. /FUCK/ I FORGET THE NAME IT'S LIKE AN OPEN FLOOR AND IT JUST TRACKS YOUR FOOT PLACEMENT#like you're supposed to slide and duck accordingly.... yeah he tears that shit up...#i have a horrible love for rhythm games hi..... they are really fun tbf ☠️☠️#but yeah ill accept that. ill take that if not only so i can laugh myself to sleep tonight
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horrorfemme1138 · 2 years
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Movie No. 15: Friday the 13th (series)
I know, I’m a day behind.
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theglizzardwizard · 2 months
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New hot take from white clash fans: a terf is when a black man (that is also trans) disagrees with you on the topic of making porn for children's media.
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number1milfloislover · 9 months
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The Third Eye, 1966.
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strang3lov3 · 2 months
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Safety First
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While camping, Joel insists on thoroughly checking you for ticks. Safety first, after all. (6.5k)
Tags - smut, dbf!joel (there was no use fighting it for this one) forced proximity, tick checks but it’s just a precaution I promise there’s no ticks involved, enemies to lovers vibes, fingering, oral (f!receiving), edging, unprotected piv, creampie, finger sucking, come eating, implied age gap, reader is description-less apart from one freckle on her buttcheek and also has pubic hair, mild mild dubcon. Fic help - @endlessthxxghts , @beefrobeefcal @noxturnalpascal thank you for helping me get this together 🩷 A/N - This has been sitting for way too long in the drafts and it does feel a little scary to post but the only way out is through ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I’m working up a pt. 2 to On Display as well as some more stepdaddy roman and some other things <3 thank you for sticking around
enjoy, my fellow freaks <3
You’re not an outdoors person. At all. You hate bugs, you hate being at the mercy of mother earth and whichever type of weather she chooses at any given moment. You hate when it’s too windy, when it’s too cold, when it’s too sunny and hot and you’re sticky and sweaty and uncomfortable. You hate the mess of it all; the mud and the dirt, walking on uneven terrain, taking careful steps so as not to brush up against poison ivy. Not to mention how with each change of the season comes another allergen, whether it be pollen or ragweed or grass. Fucking grass. The earth is covered in it, and there’s no escape. 
Except for the great indoors. Temperature controlled, a simple push of a button makes the air warmer or colder at your will. A flick of a switch makes a room light or dark. Walls protect you from insects and the rain and the harsh rays of the sun. It’s a beautiful thing, and exactly where you’re gonna stay tonight. If only you could get the television to cooperate…
“Would you quit toyin’ with the electronics? You got TV outside. Go see if you can spot a raccoon or somethin’. Thought you loved those critters.” 
You roll your eyes. You were expecting that type of comment to be made by Joel at some point or another. He’s the exact opposite of you, he is an outdoors person. He loves it all - fishing, hiking, golfing. Exposing himself to the elements. 
“I’m not going outside.” 
“Why not?”
“I’m not a nature person,” you tell him plainly. 
Joel scoffs, “God, you’re a diva. And your dad is too, for havin’ a fuckin’ camper like this. And when he gets back, you can tell him Joel said so.” He looks around himself, judging the pristine interior of your dad’s RV. Glamping. That’s what this is. It’s not real camping, not when you’ve got an oven and air conditioning and a bathroom with a shower. The point of camping is to get away from this sort of life, to reconnect with nature. “You too high-society for a tent or somethin’?” 
You turn around to look at Joel, your brows knit in faux-concern. “Wait - Joel, do you hear that?” 
“Hear what, darlin’?” Joel searches for the out of place noise you’re asking about. “I don’t hear anything.”
“It sounds like…” you hum, really putting on an act. “Sounds like this thing called air conditioning. I think it’s after your time, but it’s really neat - when it’s hot outside –”  
Joel interrupts, “Real nice, fuckin’ smartass.” He fights hard to bite down on his smile, to not give you the satisfaction of making him laugh with that zinger. “After my time,” he sneers. “You’re testin’ me. Now c’mon outside with me, let’s get a fire started.” 
“No.” 
“Do it for me,” Joel pleads. “Pretend you like me. Just for tonight, kiddo.” He wears his most charming smile and it shouldn’t work, but it does. 
“Fine,” you concede. “But I’m not doing it for you. I’m doing it so you get off my ass.” 
“Atta girl,” Joel stands up from where he sat on the couch, groaning as he stretches. You catch yourself peeking at his tummy, admiring that trail of dark hairs that travel below his belly button and beneath his pants. God, an asshole like Joel does not deserve to look as fucking handsome as he does. Thick arms and thighs, soft tummy. Sparkling chocolate eyes, a sharp aquiline nose. Gentle curls, all dark but painted with streaks of gray. And you, you have absolutely no business being so infatuated with him. 
Joel’s your father’s best friend, and a piece of shit. He’s condescending, arrogant, brash. Your dad always said Joel had a sweet spot for you, but you’re sure that couldn’t be farther from the truth. Joel taught you how to drive a stick shift, which ended with you in tears with the car stalled at the bottom of a hill. He also used to help you with your geometry homework, insistently reminding you that geometry was in fact, not useless. That he uses geometry every day of his life working in construction. Those nights at his kitchen table always ended with you and he at each other’s throats, arguing over the right answers. It didn’t last forever, though. Joel ended up moving a couple hours away, and you grew up. You found yourself missing him on occasion. As much of a dick as he was, he was still an important figure in your life. He offered you advice, let you cry on his shoulder after your first breakup, picked you up from parties you weren’t supposed to be at, no questions asked. Nevertheless, he’s still an ass. He was then, and he is now.
Actually, he’s not even supposed to be here with you right now. This was supposed to be a weekend camping trip with just you and your father, but as your dad was getting the RV in order he received a call from his next-door neighbor. Water was pouring out from his front door, which meant the entire main floor had flooded. You weren’t around for this call, however, as your dad had tasked you with hiking down to the nearby camp store to pick up some ice and some matches. Your dad left a note explaining what had happened and that his theory is that one of his idiot dogs must have turned on a sink or something. He said he was sorry for leaving, and that his old buddy Joel - you remember Joel, don’t you? - lives close by and would stop by with some dinner for you. 
Your heart raced when you read the note. It had been years since you’d last seen Joel, years since he last saw you. You knew nothing of what to expect, if he’d drop the food off and go or if he’d stick around. Your question was quickly answered when Joel pulled up in his truck, a large Aurelio’s pizza in his hands and an overstuffed backpack on his shoulder.  He tapped urgently on the camper door, “Open the door for me, would ya? Pizza’s fuckin’ hot.” 
You let Joel in wordlessly. He placed the pizza on the table, then looked for a spot to put his belongings down. “Hope you don’t mind, hon, but your dad called again and asked that I stay the night. He’s not gonna be back in time and doesn’t wanna leave ya out in the woods on your own.” 
“That’s fine,” you answered. It was quiet then, as you took in Joel and he did the same to you. He’s older now, and so are you. You felt yourself becoming shy as he scanned you up and down. Joel sensed your uncomfortability and cleared his throat, then helped himself to a slice of pizza. “Eat up,” he told you. 
That was hours ago. Early evening, maybe. The awkwardness had worn off as you shared the pizza, and you were back to bickering in no time. And now here you are, out in the trees collecting kindling for a fire. Joel’s closer to the camper, using your dad’s hatchet to chop up some firewood. “Don’t wander too far,” he calls after you. “S’gettin’ dark.” 
You roll your eyes. Like you’d ever go willingly further into the trees. You collect sticks, listening to the sounds of nature. Crickets, an animal rustling in the leaves. If there weren’t mosquitos biting your legs right now, you’d almost enjoy this. Almost. 
When you feel you’ve collected a sufficient amount of sticks, you bring it back to Joel at the campsite. Joel inspects your pile, “Looks good t’me,” he says. “Why don’t you go look for some s’mores stuff inside, I’ll get the fire started.”
You go back into the camper and browse the pantry, finding some two months expired Jet-Puffed marshmallows and some graham crackers. No chocolate, though. You opt instead for some Keebler fudge stripe cookies you packed instead and bring the ingredients out to Joel. “No chocolate,” you tell him. “Does this work?”
“Oh, s’perfect. Changes the game, actually,” he says excitedly, his eyebrows perking in excitement. “You’re a genius.” 
Your cheeks warm at the compliment. Joel sits down in one of the camping chairs, you sit at the one next to him. He finds the campfire skewers resting against the side of the RV and cleans them off in the growing fire he’s started in the firepit, then puts two marshmallows on one end, twirling them over the flame. “How toasty would you like your marshmallow, darlin’?”
“Barely,” you answer. “Like, don’t let it touch the flame.” 
“That’s asinine,” Joel replies. “Gotta give it more color than that. ‘Sposed to be on fire.” 
“No, thank you. That’s disgusting. Just golden brown, please.” 
“Golden brown. I can work with golden brown,” Joel says. He holds the marshmallow over the flame, careful not to let it touch, just like you asked. A small movement across his hand captures his attention, though. “What the…”
“What is it, Joel?”
“It’s…” Joel studies his hand, his attention now focused on a little bug crawling across it. The marshmallows on the skewer become entirely burnt, melting into the firepit as Joel tries to identify the bug. “Oh, fuck.” 
“What?”
Joel sets down the skewers and carefully shows you the bug on his hand. Teeny tiny, almond shaped, eight legs. “That’s a fuckin’ tick. He’s lookin for a place to burrow.” 
You make a repulsed face as Joel flicks the parasite into the fire. “That’s disgusting.”
“Yeah. Fuckin’ bastard. Must’ve fallen on me when we were collectin’ wood. God bless it,” he groans. “Inside. We need to check for more.” 
You pout. “Really?”
“Really,” Joel answers. “Try not to look so excited. It’s only a couple ‘a minutes. We’ll make new s’mores when we’re done.”
You get out of your chair and Joel holds the camper door open for you, letting you inside first. He follows suit, only after dumping some water on the fire. He’s got enough dry wood to start a new one when you come back out there. You sit on the couch and Joel joins you, then pulls off his t-shirt. He runs his hands through his hair, using his fingers to search for anything that feels like it’s not supposed to be there. He turns away from you, “Check my neck and back for me, first,” he says. “Please.” 
Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Joel’s half naked in front of you, and you’re tasked with searching his body. Every goddamn inch. It’s going to be fucking torture. “Okay,” you breathe.
You hesitantly reach for his shoulders and pull them back slightly to urge him to sit up straighter, then push his curls away from his neck. Joel shivers slightly with your touch. You inspect the nape of his neck, then one shoulder, then the other. He’s so fucking broad, his shoulders miles wide. Joel senses your timidity as you gingerly touch him, “Need somethin’ from me? Want me to lean forward a little?”
“Uhm…yeah - yes,” you whisper. 
Joel leans forward to allow you to search the expanse of his back for any ticks. Thankfully, you’re coming up empty. Just all of Joel’s tan, smooth skin, all for you to touch and examine under the warm glow of the lights. You find yourself mesmerized by the steady rise and fall of his torso with every breath he takes, the silvery stretch marks by his hips. His skin is so warm under the palms of your hands, all you can think about is touching, feeling, scratching him. His voice interrupts you from your thoughts, “You done?”
“Mhm.” 
Joel sits up and turns in your direction. “Front side, now,” he says. He’s looking right at you as you search his chest, just in case you see something he can’t. He holds out his arms one at a time for you to inspect and turn over, then raises them for you to check his underarms. When you’re finished, Joel stands up and unbuckles his belt. You swallow thickly. 
“I know. M’not thrilled either, hon, but they do like to hide in the more…private areas of the body.” 
“Oh.” 
“Yeah,” Joel says. “Oh.” 
You avert your eyes as he pulls off both his jeans and boxers, covering his member with his two hands. “I can do my…you don’t have to check that out. But –”
“Your ass.” 
“My ass,” Joel sighs. “And legs. ‘Specially the back of ‘em, where I can’t see.” 
“Got it.” 
This couldn’t be more…god. Joel’s awkwardly covering himself with two hands, his head tilted back and looking at the ceiling. He turns around for you to check his backside and luckily there’s nothing, just his plump ass. If you were a better woman, you wouldn’t be thinking of squeezing it right now. Fuck. He’s so hot like this, completely nude and on display for you. His legs are so long and muscular, his tummy is soft and pillowy. 
You’re so quiet. God, Joel feels terrible for putting you through this. You must be so uncomfortable, but ticks are not worth rolling the dice on. Disgusting parasites. He decides to break the tension. “You remember my brother Tommy, don’tcha?”
Tommy. Younger than Joel, just as handsome. You didn’t see him as much as you saw Joel growing up, but you know him. “Yeah, sure. I remember Tommy.”
“Right. Well, Tommy knows all about ticks in places they ain’t ‘sposed to be.” 
“Oh?”
Joel turns around for you to check his thighs, then the front of his legs. “Mhm,” he says. “Fuck, I shouldn’t have said anything. He’d kill me for tellin’ ya.”
“No, no - tell me.” 
“Keep it to yourself. Don’t let him know I told ya,” Joel warns, then clears his throat before speaking. “Well,” Joel begins, “It’s Tommy’s senior year of high school right after graduation. His class goes campin’, right? Tommy meets up with a girl, things start to heat up.” 
“Right.”
“Right. You know where this is goin’. Clothes are comin’ off, they’re gettin’ handsy. And this girl feels somethin’ she ain’t supposed to on his uh…on his member.”
You gasp, “No.” 
“Tommy pulls out his flashlight and lo and behold…”
“Tick on his dick.”
“Tick on his dick,” Joel confirms. “Fully buried, and all full of blood. I don’t even know how he was able to get it up, truth be told.” 
“You’re joking. Joel, that’s fucking disgusting. Tell me you’re joking.” 
Joel looks down at you, his lips pressed together as he tries to stifle his laughter and shakes his head. In between gasps and giggles, Joel explains, “He made the poor girl drive him to the ER cause he was a faintin’ mess. I met ‘em both there. I was there when Tommy was explainin’ it all to the nurse, this little old lady. And she said somethin’ about his dick bein’ ribbed for her pleasure or somethin’ like that, fuckin’ riot of a woman. Oh god, I’d never seen him so red in my life,” he wipes a stray tear of laughter from his eye, then goes right back to laughing. 
You’re giggling with Joel. The way he tells the story, like he’s right back in the ER with Tommy tells you he’s being truthful. His eyes crinkle as he laughs.
“So then what happened?” 
“Well, Tommy ended up alright,” Joel says. “Poor girl never spoke to him again, though. Didn’t take long for rumors to start spreadin’, his friends all called him ‘Tommy Tick Dick’. He enlisted in the army shortly after that.” 
“Oh, did he?” 
“He was a real patriot, and there was nothin’ else to it,” Joel exaggerates the sentence as if he’s mocking Tommy. “Or so he says,” he adds. 
“So he says.” 
By the time Joel’s finished the story, you’re long done with his tick check. He puts on his boxer shorts and sits on the couch next to you, both of you still chuckling. “Alright, your turn.” 
“What do you mean, my turn?” 
“You were in the woods too, right? And longer than I was. You’re at more of a risk. I need’a check you, now.” 
“Oh, no thank you.” 
It’s not that you don’t trust Joel or anything like that. But Joel doesn’t need to know how turned on you are just from seeing and feeling his naked body. It’d be so obvious - he’d see your hard nipples and your arousal-soaked panties. And it’d only worsen as he touches you, his warm, masculine hands traveling over your body as he carefully searches every inch of your skin. On no planet would you expect him to be a gentleman about it, either. You know he’d tease you in one way or another, get some sort of sick satisfaction out of knowing how you really feel about him, deep down inside. 
“Yeah, nice try,” he says. “You got two choices: you can let me check ya for ticks now while it’s still easy, or you can wait until one’s buried in your skin and suckin’ your blood. I’d suggest the former.” 
He makes a compelling argument. “Former,” you agree, no questions about it. You can’t stand when a fly lands on you, or when an ant crawls across your foot. The thought of a tick in your…you’re not even going there. You’re gonna puke. 
“I’ll make it quick,” Joel assures. “Promise ya.”
Joel helps you to undress. He holds the sleeves of your hoodie as you pull your arms out of them, then pulls the garment off of you entirely, leaving you in just your bra. “Ready?” he asks, gently toying with the strap. 
“Mhm.” 
His fingers feel like pure electricity as they skate along your skin, he unclasps your bra and lets it fall to your lap. Instinctually, you cover your chest and turn away from him to allow him to check your skin. Just like you did to him, he checks your neck and shoulders first, his warm breaths fanning over you. His hands travel down your spine as he pushes you down, exposing more of your body for him to search. He traces over every mark, your skin erupting in goosebumps as he does. “You’re good. Come and face me, now,” he whispers. “Won’t bite ya.” 
You turn your body in Joel’s direction, still covering yourself. He holds your chin between his pointer finger and his thumb, turning your head back and to the side so he can check your throat, and then your collarbones. Joel reaches for your wrist and pulls it toward his body, stretching your arm out for him to turn over and inspect. He does the same with your other arm, patient as you adjust the way you cover yourself. His eyes widen slightly when you accidentally expose yourself, but you don’t seem to notice your mistake. 
“Stand up for me, now. Lemme check the rest.” 
He looks at the wall as you shimmy off your shorts, but leave your panties on. Fuck, you can feel how wet you are, that little awful mess between your thighs. You stand in front of him, arms still crossed over your chest. “Gimme a leg,” Joel murmurs, and you lift one leg and he sets your foot on the couch next to his thigh. He keeps one hand on your hip, holding you steady as he scans your thigh, turning your leg to the side so he can check your calves. He helps you back to two feet, then repeats the process with your other leg. “Good. Almost done, kiddo. You’re doin’ fine.” 
You turn around for him to check your backside, make sure nothing’s hanging out where it’s not supposed to be. “Just gonna move this to the side…” Joel says, carefully pulling the elastic of your panties out of the way. His fingers grace over the swell of your ass, as he quickly checks one side, then does the same thing to the other side. “Wait a sec–”
Your heart stops. “What?”
“Oh, you have got to be shittin’ me.” 
“Joel–”
“Get on the couch and lay on your stomach. Hurry, do it now.” 
You lay on your stomach on the couch, Joel picks up both of your legs and pulls your body until your ass is right on his lap. “Sorry, kiddo. Just bein’ thorough, here.” Your heart pounds as he moves your panties to the side and gingerly prods at an area on your ass cheek, right where it meets your thigh. Just millimeters away from where you need him most, where you’re dripping for him…
“Oh, thank Christ. False alarm. Just a freckle or birthmark or somethin’ back here,” Joel sighs in relief. But for you, relief never comes. Joel’s hand stays on your ass, his thumb rubbing back and forth over your skin. With each pass, he’s getting closer to your pussy, but still achingly far from it. “You’re clean.” 
“O-oh.”
Joel hears the uncertainty in your tone. “You alright there, darlin’?”
“Mhm,” you answer. 
“You can put your clothes back on now.” 
Joel waits. It’s as if he said nothing at all, the way you ignore his suggestion. He finds it a little interesting that you won’t move, how you seem cozy on his lap. And in fact, you’re sighing, sort of inching your way closer to him. 
“Hon?”
“Hmm?”
“You gonna get dressed with me?”
“Mhm.”  
You’ve lost all subtlety. Joel notices that you’re arching your back, sort of rocking yourself on him. Trying to nudge his fingers just a little lower. You’re successful, and Joel feels the damp cotton of your panties on the tips of his fingertips and realizes, “Ohh. I get it,” he mumbles, chuckling. “You’re not bein’ subtle, you know.” 
“I’m not doing anything,” you lie. The first words out of your mouth that aren’t a lazy, quiet moan or hum of pleasure.
“Neither am I.”
Joel had an inkling that something like this was going on with you. He saw how your eyes wandered over his body, how your pupils went wide at the sight of his body. He could practically hear the thoughts in your brain, but he bit his tongue. Maybe he was wrong, maybe you were just nervous. It’d make sense. But he’d bit his tongue before, when all those years ago he helped maneuver your belongings in his truck to your college dorm. You fell asleep in the passenger seat next to him, your sleepy breaths turned to quiet whimpers of his name in your sleep as you squeezed your thighs together. Joel never mentioned it to you, wanting to protect you from the embarrassment. But he heard his name clear as day. 
He wonders how much longer you’ll keep this up for, writhing on his lap, never asking him for what you want. Joel knows exactly why, too. You’ve got some sort of reputation to uphold, you can never give him the satisfaction of knowing that maybe, just maybe, you like him. Even if it’s just sexual, born out of nothing but need for pleasure - pure, stupid pleasure. 
“You can just ask f’ya want somethin’ from me,” Joel encourages. “S’all you gotta do.”  To Joel’s amusement, you stay quiet. You’re really not doing yourself any sort of favors. “Not gonna?”
“No.” 
“Ah, she speaks. So you’re not gonna ask for nothin’, not gonna tell me what you want?” Joel moves your panties to the side and rests his fingers against your center, all hot and dripping with need. “C’mon, now.”
You’re fighting against yourself. You know this, know that if you so much as lean into his touch a little more than you should that technically, you’re compliant - you’re docile, you’re willing. You’ll lose the game - a game where your only opponent is yourself, yet Joel wins all the same. 
“Got no good reason to be stubborn about this,” he purrs. He slides both hands over the swell of your ass and hooks his fingers under the waistband of your panties, then pulls them down your thighs and off your legs. He parts your legs and cups your mound, toying with the hair there before dipping his fingers between your lips, humming in delight when he feels the considerable pool of arousal at your core. You’re fucking soaked, and despite this, you still won’t say a word. You just whimper and wiggle against him. “F’ya don’t ask, you don’t receive. You wanna keep makin’ things difficult for yourself?”
It’s a warning, but he’s giving you an out. You prop yourself up on your elbows, then turn your head and look over your shoulders at Joel. He searches your face and waits for you to speak, but you don’t. Of course you don’t, because you’re hellbent on giving Joel any shred of pride about this, the fact he’s got you in his lap and melting under your touch. It’s all futile, though. He can see it on your face, your wide eyes and your open mouth, practically salivating as you watch him stroke your folds gently, so gently. Joel smiles, unashamed of the pleasure he’s getting out of this.  
“You know what’d happen if you used your words? F’ya told me that ya want me?”
“What?” 
“Well,” Joel says, dipping two fingers into your slick entrance. He pushes them in slowly, letting you feel the way his knuckles stretch your pussy. He pulls them out almost all the way to admire the way you’ve soaked him, then pushes back in. He continues, “I’d give you the lovin’ I know you need. Make you come however you’d like, however much you’d like. Would that be so terrible?” 
You whimper as he begins to curl his fingers, “Joel.” 
“I know you’re tempted, sweetheart. It’s yours if you want it.” 
Last chance. He’d make good on his promise, you can see it in his eyes, all dark with lust and wide with excitement. You can feel it in his touch, the intent to bring you nothing but pleasure evident in how he strokes you. But maybe you don’t need to be loved right now, maybe you’d prefer to be used. To feel him indulge himself in your cunt, feel his selfishness in the way he fucks you, and never allow him the satisfaction of making you come. You win the game this way.  
“Other option is, we do things my way. Couldn’t quite tell you yet exactly what that entails, though…so weigh your risk and reward carefully.” Joel warns. “Last call, darlin’. Speak now or forever hold your peace.” Joel waits for you to object, but you never do. Game restarted, ignited by the way you settle in his lap, your silent way of telling him your body is for him to use as he pleases. “Alright, then. My way it is.” 
Joel curls his fingers rhythmically in your cunt, brushing against that sweet spot inside of you. He groans, loving those slick, wet noises your cunt makes for him as he admires your body laid out on his lap, all of that soft, smooth skin of yours is just for him. You squirm as he touches you, biting down on your moans and letting him only hear quiet sighs of pleasure. 
As quickly as it begins, it’s over. Joel pulls his fingers from you and you whine in disappointment. “Somethin’ you wanna tell me?” Joel asks, “What’s the matter?”
“Nothing, just–” 
Joel wraps both of his big, masculine hands over your waist and pushes you further up the seat of the couch so that you’re not laid across his lap any longer. He kneels behind you and looks around for something - pillow, clothes, blanket - he tugs on a removable couch cushion and you look over your shoulder in curiosity. 
“Then don’t you worry about what I’m doin’ back here,” he says. “Eyes forward.” 
You turn back around, excitement bubbling in your lower stomach. Joel taps your hip, “Lift up for me, kiddo,” he urges, and you lift your hips. He slides a pillow under them, propping your ass up for him. He lays on his tummy, and it’s a rather tight fit on the couch of the camper but he doesn’t mind. 
Joel nudges your thighs apart a little and harshly squeezes the flesh of your ass. He spreads your cheeks apart, finally getting a picture-perfect view of your cunt, all glistening with ribbons of your creamy arousal. He can see the muscles twitch, your hole puckering as you await his touch. “You made a mess,” he murmurs, sliding the pad of his thumb through your slick folds. He collects your arousal on his fingertips and lunges forward, his body covering yours and brings those fingers to your lips and pushes them into your mouth. You can feel his hard cock through the thin fabric of his boxers, Joel grinding himself against your ass as you suck his fingers clean, you hum at the taste. 
He pulls his fingers from your mouth and gets right back into position, his knees cracking as he does, spreading you out again so that he can bury his face in your pussy. He does exactly that, pressing a kiss to your slick, warm center, dragging his tongue up higher until he reaches your asshole. You gasp when Joel spits on it and circles the muscle with his tongue, fuck, he really is doing things his way. He rounds your tight hole, all wet and sloppy before he dips his tongue inside, causing you to squirm at the unfamiliar sensation. He finishes the job with a couple of kisses there, kisses that travel lower and lower until he reaches your pussy once again. 
The little sigh of relief you breathe out when Joel’s lips reach the area you need him most is not lost on him, and he smirks against you. He kisses your pussy, loving the way your slick, soft cunt feels against his lips, against his face. Joel inhales you, the scent of your sweet arousal. He hopes that later, he’ll smell your essence on his mustache and be reminded of this moment here with you, and he’ll be hard all over again. He’ll stroke his cock and think of your cunt, groaning your name as he spills into his own hand. But for now, he focuses on you. 
He uses a pointed tongue to trace along the length of your folds, up and down, up and down until his it rests against your slick hole. He dips inside and tastes your honeyed arousal, he finds your heady, musky flavor so addicting. He could spend forever here, that perfect, warm, private space between your thighs. 
Joel finds himself torn between wanting to eat you the way he should and the way he wants to. He vacillates between savoring you, loving your soft, wet cunt and the way he can make you grind on his face, even if it’s just slightly, and devouring you whole, sucking your sensitive bud to make your legs shake and causing you to pull away from him - he knows it’s too much too fast. Joel settles on the latter of the two manners. His tongue laving over your pussy, lips wrapped around your clit is not something he does for you, but to you. It’s all for him, after all. There’s passion and determination, and he means to love you, please you. But it devolves, it’s all aggression, fingernails digging into your flesh and bruising you almost like he could strip your bones of it. 
He’s getting ahead of himself. If his scruff were shorter, he’d be rubbing you raw, and you almost wish he could. Joel wishes to smell and taste you later, you yearn to feel him on your skin just the same. You’d feel your tender inner thighs ache when you sit down and when you shower, the lather of your soap making your skin burn. You’d remember the weight of his hands holding your ass in place, the pressure of his tongue lapping your folds. You reach behind yourself, searching for something, any part of him to hold onto. You tangle your fingers in his hair, tugging at those graying curls as you bite into the flesh of your own thumb. 
“J- fuck, oh my god.” 
You’re moaning, unable to help yourself. Getting close, you attempt to pull away from Joel, seeking to limit your own pleasure so as not to come on his tongue. 
“Don’t you run from me,” Joel mumbles, pulling you right back in. He keeps you held still, so secure in his grip that you can’t writhe and squirm away from or toward him. “You’re gonna take it,” he tells you. You’re gonna feel his sharp, big nose tease your ass, feel his tongue lapping at your sensitive clit. Joel eats you like he’s starved and you’re the first meal he’s seen in days, steaming hot and ready for him to sink his teeth into. 
You’re seeing stars. It takes all the mental focus you have not to come on his tongue, not to give him that reward. Joel finds it all amusing, you won’t even let yourself moan. He can hear that you’re trying to, but you’re swallowing your own noises and whimpering into your skin. Your thighs twitch with your impending release, and Joel tries his hardest to push you over the edge. But Joel’s only a man, and when his jaw and his tongue begin to tire he relents, pulling away from your body only in minor defeat. “You might’a won the battle,” he says, biting your ass cheek right where it meets your thigh. “But you’re losin’ the war. I ain’t finished with you yet.” 
Joel kneels behind you, then spreads your thighs apart with one of his knees. “Nice an’ wide,” he instructs. He groans as he pushes the waistband of his boxers down his thighs, his leaking and rock hard cock springing free. He spits in his hand and pumps it a couple times, coating his member in his own saliva before he leans lower, lower, until the blunt head of his cock is nudging against your core. One of his arms is bent and hovering near your head as notches himself inside you, then pulls out, only to push himself back in slightly. He chuckles when you squirm, arching your back in attempt to take more than what he’s giving you. “Easy, easy,” he purrs. “You’re hellbent against comin’ for me anyway, so what’s with the rushin’?”
“Joel,” you whine. 
“Oh, I know…” Joel groans as he buries himself into you fully, that slow, slide inside your body has him biting his lower lip. You’re so tight, and Joel knows you’re loving that ache, that stretch and burn of his thick cock splitting you open. “Got you figured out, you know. I know why you’re doin’ this,” he grunts, pulling out of you all the way. He pushes back inside you, “You think you’re provin’ a point.” 
“Joel, I’m -”
“You don’t have to like me, sweetheart, but I know you like how I make ya feel. It’s allowed, baby. This don’t have to mean nothin’ else.” 
You don’t answer him. Not that you could, anyway. He’s building a steady pace, fucking you so deeply and so intentional. His motions are fluid, his cock hitting you in all the right places. You feel his hot breath on your neck, his warm body moving against yours, and you’re losing yourself in him, moaning and babbling nonsense. You reach for his hand in front of you and bring it to your mouth, then suck and nibble on two of his thick fingers. Fuck, you can taste yourself on his skin. 
Joel likes this, the feeling of your lips and tongue and teeth on his fingers. He knows you’re trying to pacify yourself, quiet your noises as if by doing so, you could push away the pleasure building deep inside you. The attempt only serves to egg him on, fuck you harder, faster. He slides a hand under your tummy and his fingers find your clit, the weight of his body on yours and the pillow under your abdomen aids him to achieve a perfect angle to stimulate and massage your sensitive bud. “Oh, there it is. You’re in for it now, kiddo.” 
It works like a charm. You gag on his fingers, slobbering as Joel fucks you. All you can do is take it, take the pleasure that he creates with you between stuttering hips and writhing bodies. It’s quickly becoming too much, release is inevitable as Joel fills you up over and over and over. You can’t stave it off much longer, not when you can hear the lewd, obscene noises of you cunt gushing on his cock and Joel, with his grunting, moaning. “Fuck, sweetheart. Goddamn.” Hot tears begin to spill down your cheeks, dampening his skin and Joel knows, oh how he knows how hard this is for you, you poor thing. He’ll soothe you if you’ll let him. “Come on, hon. Let go for me.” he urges. “You’re gonna come for me.” 
There’s no choice in the matter anymore, and you realize this. Nowhere to run and hide. You can feel your clit grinding against the calloused pads of Joel’s thick fingers and it’s only a matter of time. Tears are falling freely now, and Joel pulls his hand away from your mouth to wipe them off your skin. “You’re fine,” he says. “You can take it.” 
Joel manages to pull the hood of your clit back a little, making it all that much more sensitive as he rolls his hips into you. Your desperate moans and your squirming beneath him fills him with amusement. He admires your determination, how exhausting this must be for you. 
It’s just a few seconds of Joel painting your clit with tight and steady circles as he thrusts into you repeatedly. Release is right around the corner, you know it and so does Joel. There’s an intense, fiery and electric pleasure building deep in your gut, threatening to spill over. You feel it trickling down your thighs, traveling up your spine and when you gasp sharply, Joel knows you’re coming. “There it is,” he praises. “Oh, there you are. Good girl, good girl. I know that feels good.” 
He fucks you through your orgasm and even well past its departure so that you’re not sure where your climax begins and ends. It’s an overwhelming feeling, the most powerful orgasm you’ve ever felt before, intensified by his sloppy and stuttering thrusts as he finds his own release. You sigh as you feel him empty himself into you, dick twitching against your walls, his hot come paints your insides and fills you with a deep and satisfying warmth. 
Joel slows down, then stills completely as you both catch your breath. He pulls out of you with a grunt, watching the mess of his come and yours spill onto the fabric beneath your body. He pushes it back inside you, then brings his fingers to your lips. When you suck his fingers clean of the spend, he kisses your temple and scoops you into his arms, trailing his fingers up and down your spine. He can feel your satisfaction in your limp body, the way you relax into him. Joel chooses not to tease you for losing the game. 
After quiet moments pass, Joel hears you giggling to yourself. “Hey, you,” he says. “What’s so funny?”
“Tommy Tick Dick,” you answer.
 Joel giggles with you, his eyes crinkling and sparkling with his laughter. “Oh, I’m goin’ to hell for that.” 
“What, for laughing? I’m laughing, too.”
“No,” he chuckles. “I’m the one who started callin’ him Tommy Tick Dick.” 
-
i'd like to share with you a poem written by @beefrobeefcal about this fic.
tick on his dick little nibbly friend chomping on down on tommy's bell end
If you enjoyed, please reblog/send me an ask/comment and tell me your thoughts! Your feedback keeps me motivated to write 🩷
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bitter69uk · 14 days
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“Had Diamanda Galás been born 400 years ago, she would have been declared a witch.  These days, she merely sings like she’s being burnt at the stake. The grimly beautiful Greek American chanteuse belongs to that elite company of divas of despair that includes Nico, Lydia Lunch and latter-day Marianne Faithfull. Unlikely as it sounds, Galás has hooked up with Led Zeppelin's John Paul Jones for this album, which matches his menacing slabs of eight-string bass to her avant-garde sensibilities and operatic ululations. The results seethe with tension and drama. “Skótoseme” (Greek for “kill me”) sees Galás’ mourning wails swept along by an Arabian drone. On the sarcastic “Do You Take This Man?”, she lashes out like a blues mama who’s been pushed too far, while the title track details a group of vengeful prostitutes gleefully plotting to murder a john. The Sporting Life is marinated in equal parts malice and black humour.”
/ From my review of The Sporting Life for the British music magazine Vox, 1994 /
“John Paul Jones and Diamanda Galás crumble the little gingerbread house of rock illusions with their collaborative album, The Sporting Life, detonating all the overplayed crap we’ve become accustomed to - the bland bass/drum rhythms, the singer hooting oooh baby baby, the guitar and its obligatory solo wheeze. The album opens the genre to an expanse where divisions between what is electronic and what is “natural” smear, where the instrument is only as good as its ability to scalp you …”
/ From Bomb magazine, October 1994 /
Released thirty year ago today (6 September 1994): the album The Sporting Life, a collaboration between Diamanda Galás and John Paul Jones, a true marriage made in heaven / hell. I saw the duo perform together in London on this tour. In addition to the songs cited above, I’d recommend the ballad “Tony” (on which Galás vows “I'll walk the street at night / screamin' your name …” and sounds like a bummed-out Janis Joplin) and her wild interpretation of the 60s soul classic “The Dark End of the Street.”
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hxneylavendxr · 2 years
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if i had a higher patience for the drawing process i would doodle mika in wagama kojocho with shu in dimension.... this event has me thinking thoughts
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kitschykitschykoo · 10 months
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He used to be such a happy little puppy...
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frillsand · 1 year
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Bodyguard Jumpscare
Quick question. Should his name stay Max?
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So his story isn’t that deep, he had trouble getting hired at a good paying job because he looked “unwelcoming”. He’s been a bouncer before but he decided to move away from that for something more stable. Wally offered him a job as his security guard after he saves Wally from a group of thieves, thinking that Wally was a child. The man declined the offer.
Wally kinda followed him around that week, “discreetly” if you asked him. He watched as his future guard gets turned down, job after job. He found this man very strange, for how scary he looked, he didn’t feel intimidated.
He literally annoyed this guy so much, he agreed if Wally promised to shut up.
I should mention that this was also early in his career before his whole diva act even started. Wally was a lot more nervous especially with the stress of having an upcoming show. He’s been meaning to hire a guard, he just couldn’t find anyone suitable until he met him.
They both argue with each other frequently but they have this strange bond. He’s the first human Wally can trusts with his life and the only one that gets to physically handle Wally( carry him, pick him up, throw him aside)
I wish I could express their dynamic better
I’d been hoarding his design since the beginning of July, I’ve been hoarding a lot of art actually. He’s so different, it’s hard for me to draw him, so I’ll rarely do it.
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These are also old. Don’t look too much into any writing, it’s not something I’m good at.
If no one says anything, his name is staying Max ✨
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throwawaybog · 7 months
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its missing cleuce hours. you dont understand. they werent just dating, deuce writes in his diary that shes his best friend too. do you understand. she's his best friend. they were so in love that it broke even cupid's love arrow. do you not see how insane that is. do you not see why elementary school me was so feral over the fact that the hot popular mean girl actually had depth and was not a one-dimensional caricature. that she actually cared abt the ppl she chose to call friends. that she genuinely loved that skater boy and it wasnt just a "hes popular, im popular, we should be together" thing. that she stood up to her father and her sister and chose him??? that everytime girls asked deuce why he was with cleo the answer was, to him, always so obvious?? that he stumbles over his words for her sometimes but she--the perfection princess--understands what he's trying to say?? he cooks for her. he loves cooking and its a secret but he cooks for her. she plays video games with him. he takes her shopping. you see? they both take the time to understand and participate in each others interests. theyre both jealous. theyre both competitive. but he relaxes her. and he supports her. and she supports him. (the cheer competition. that card game the boys were playing) his snakes give her little kisses on the forehead. she went to scaris on a trip for like, a few days to a week, and he missed her so bad. he was in love with her when she was dating his best friend. she was in love with him when she was dating his best friend. she was dating his best friend bc of cupids love arrow. do you?? do you see it???? they've broken up maybe 3-4 times, and each time has lasted from 3 seconds to a day to a few days at most, and each time it was because misunderstandings, insecurities, or the involvement of cleo's family. and they always, always talked it out and came back to each other bc it wasnt a "break up" really it was more a "pause. holy shit what did i do? i love him/her. he/she loves me. i need to think abt what went wrong and address it.'" its abt the accountability. its abt them choosing each other. a wish someone made had him forget her and he still fell when he saw her again. do you see????? shes a diva and he loves it. hes a skater boy and she adores him. DO YOU SEE?????
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