#sad because i really enjoyed it
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quit the dutch bros job... sad to have done it, but it was too much work/studying for too little pay. plus some of their policies were too stupid to deal w for being part-time.
#sad because i really enjoyed it#but i feel like it wasn't worth the pay/effort.#manager was super sweet about it though. told me i always had a home there and i'm always welcome to re-apply.#partner told me he was very proud of me for giving it a shot and seeing it through and deciding it just wasn't for me.#i feel a little guilty for quitting but that job was not worth the stress it was putting me in. and all the hoops they made me jump through#while being sick.#.diary#onto the next thing
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reunion 🌸
#persona 3#persona 3 spoilers#minato arisato#makoto yuki#ryoji mochizuki#aigis#ryomina#lizzy does art#HELLO EVERYONE!!! march 5th is upon us again so i bring... my contribution for this year. my third year drawing for it!#i made the thumbnail for this a few weeks after last year's graduation day#i thought it would be fun to lean into the ryominaigis angle of graduation day (you could read this as minato/aigis if you like-#but i feel like most people would read it as ryoji/minato)#IN ANY CASE working on this made me very emotional over this game :') (specifically minato)#i really enjoy how p3 ends it's such a nice way of wrapping up the narrative's messages and themes#working on this. minato's kindness was at the forefront of my mind throughout the piece#and i really wanted to capture how. ultimately it was his decision to sacrifice himself- to do the great seal#while to an outsider's perspective it is. sad that minato passes. i think becoming the seal is something that minato-#actively welcomes. in the same way that death (ryoji) is a comfort to him because death was housed in him for Ten YearsTM#AND I ALSO GOT REALLY SAD OVER AIGIS TOO. i still get fucked up over how in fes's animated cutscene for 3/5 they portray-#her as human and not drawing the robot parts so i wanted to do something smilar here...#but also i am very sad on aigis's behalf because she discovers her humanity through minato and realizes what she-#wants to do and then. well. minato is like. he's ready to pass on (even if he's scared) and im like. OH MY GOD THIS TRIO GETS ME MESSED UP#this was more coherent in my head LOL BUT ough i like drawing p3 and working through my feelings about it...#anyway! happy (in quotations) march 5th. i love this game to bits. it's so fun to draw for this day every year and see how i've improved#if you've read all this thank you :) lizzy appreciates you all very much. mwah! <3
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New blorbo :)
Also a silly interaction with this piece
#cardcaptor sakura#eriol hiiragizawa#I wish I had the big hat big robe flowy cape drip. I wish#spoilers so don’t read further if you haven’t reached the end of sakura (looking at you whery)#but I enjoy him immensely and it makes me so sad to see how much he’s shipped with tomoyo#in old fanfics and stuff I mean.#like I don’t agree sometimes with the show’s direction of romantic relationships (rika and terada sensei come to mind)#but to me tomoyo is a diehard lesbian and you cannot convince me she’d be happy with Eriol#that aside I do think eriol is the most fascinating character and also a dead ringer for most of the traits I like in characters lmao.#if I had a nickel for every time I enjoyed a character who is mature for his age and has more power than he knows what to do with#I think a character study on him would be cool#like when did he realize he wasn’t aging. was his aging restricted because of his magic or an intentional choice from the memories of clow.#where does clow end and eriol begin and how much does memory contribute to identity#I’d really like to see a fic just about his interactions with fujitaka and the kinomoto family as well
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go my hyucker (human gucker)
ssso my good friend pastell @startagainaprologue mentioned it was struggling with making a human design for the guide and i rubbed my hands together evilly and got to work. aaaaa this was super fun to work on!!!!! thankyou again for letting me draw this graaaa. as always my deranged character design ramblings are below the cut 👍
CHARACTER DESIGN BLAST
most of guide’s colors are slightly shifted to be closer to red and more… desaturated? my default bonnie colors clashed with the palette i usually use for guide so they got changed slightly. i did add the blue on the sash as a reference to my nille design however! and i tend to use cooler colors to represent countries outside of vaugarde, so you could interpret it as a link to the island. if you so desire :3
speaking of the sash, just about everything they’re wearing here is based on another character!! in this case, it’s meant to resemble nille’s waist sash! but with a different pattern. something something only having an imitation of what it lost. the stars are meant to represent siffrin and loop, and also just the universe in general. fun stuff!
i mostly just made their shirt longer for the sake of looking Different from normal bonnie? but combined with the sash it has the fun bonus of having a silhouette similar to siffrin’s cloak. not full intentional but hey! i’ll take it!
the gems on its tail are there to represent odile!! as well as referencing the ka buan tradition of compressing ashes into diamonds. you can draw your own conclusions there! and they go ding ding when it walks :3
the hat/halo isss probably self explanatory? it’s a way to fit guide’s Spiky Head into the design. the halo was added pafter pastell drew buns version of the design auau. i like both! so their hat can be whatever shape you please.
okay! nno more talking about clothes i promise. similar to my ghostlight loop design, i gave it spikier hair!! i have to give sponsors spiky hair to resemble their Spiky Heads. it’s the law. their hair was supposed to be shorter but. i’m pretty sure this is the exact same length i usually draw bonnie’s hair. oops? oh well it looks cute. the stars are honestly just there for fun i didn’t have anything specific in mind
in a similar vein, i changed their eye shape to match the eye shape on guide’s ref! perpetually Sad Looking. on the bright side they aren’t constantly crying anymore!
thheir body is. mostly the same? i decided to make their body Red Tinted for the sake of consistency and i removed the separated limbs aaand. that’s basically it? not much to say! i did add the halo bracelet around their wrist as a callback to the separation though. i didn’t do the same for its shoulder because i am Lazy 🩶
aaand i think that’s everything? well it Isn’t but i think everything else is self explanatory and frankly this is long enough as is. here is the """greyscale""" version as compensation 🩶
#marshdoodles#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#randomized isatswap au#with how much text in this post this could probably qualify as marshtalkin. whatever#there was One Thing i didnt mention and that was the earrings.#wwwhich were based on nille’s earrings in my design for her. and also stars because Yknow#but ggggoood lort i think the post is long enough as is!#aaand i feel there is probably. Some Kind of conformer in their eye. so it cant open. sad!#also fffor the record. this was supposed to post Before bald gulker and bowlker. i just got really sidetracked#aaanyways. sorry for being gone so long aauauua. iii. kept forgetting to post 💔#i should post some of my backlogged art#i havent posted much from my current canvas… auauaua…#enjoy the gulker mush 👍
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to my IRL(s) who keeps sending me disco elysium memes despite the fact i haven't played it in months THIS IS BECAUSE OF YOU. HELP ME. If people have ideas on this AU feel free to have fun with it considering I. have only a few!
#zombiecleo#ethoslab#hermitcraft#scopophobia cw#hermitcraft AU#tag ramble time!#don't. worry about the text. yes it's trying to imply that etho can see us and break the fourth wall Don't Worry About It#this AU really was 'i wanna draw hermits in DE outfits who's pathetic and sad enough to b– yeah it's etho.'#'that makes cleo Kim then. I think they'd make it work' and that was it#in my heart it's also an AT so they're working a different case somewhere else in universe. mostly because i don't think them and-#-cuno/cunoesse should exist at the same time.. etho can have a drug addiction but cleo is NOT getting called a faggot /lh#Cleo getting written as 'just cleo' in text is kinda silly i enjoy it. hopefully that wasn't used in the actual game and i forgot about it#art out the oven#art wise this was really fun i locked myself in values jail but the colours turned out reasonable anyway which is always nice#yes cleo has gauges and an undercut <3#[scheduled]#EDIT: oh god. i have to add a tag for this AU#Disco Hermits AU
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evo doodling
#xmen#xmen evolution#wanda maximoff#scarlet witch#pietro maximoff#quicksilver#snap sketches#accidental sequel to my other evo drawing GODDAMMIT#chat someone remind me to make a color ref sheet on my desktop because i keep getting jumpscared when i look from my tablet to my cpu#anyways. hello. first day with my finals Almost Done and i draw the twins vjARLKVJRAKL#SORRY i just got really emo thinking of the love in pietros heart this morning ...#i was gonna draw their usual designs but i got distracted thinking of an evo comic i wanted to doodle#and then i just. and now we're here#the initial sketch i had made me sad for some reason it wasnt even that different from this final#i just got emo while drawing ... idk .... siblings looking after each other esp because of a shitty parent will always get me the most#i will end my ramble there before it gets too personal .. lol ... anyways please enjoy my doodle#i have decided to steal the freckles from rivals wanda because theyre cute i think ......#im still figurin out how to draw these two ... i like them a lot me thinks ... i would like to read more of them ..#ok BYEBYE
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I just feel like she hopes she'll become someone better but cries knowing she won't.
#sorry if it feels mischarcatery its just been stuck in my head#missy makes me so sad you guys :(#the doctor didnt even really know who she was in the end#and i feel like she wishes that he did. and that she got to keep being herself because Missy was someone she enjoyed being#compared to the master yknow?#doctor who s8 ep11 spoilers#shes so :(#missy#doctor who#the master#myart#im so proud of this actually i did it in ibit paint with a soft zero texture brush which is like woah#its a little dramatic for mtly tastes but oughhhh
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zenos, but he's getting spammed by his weirdly tech savvy great-grandfather.
#sketch#wip#ffxiv#zenos yae galvus#garlean communicators but some of them are just really sturdy flip phones#man's just trying to train in peace before his phone starts exploding#this is also spawned from me remembering how tech savvy zenos himself is implied to be lol#he can probably drive- he can pilot- and we've seen him fix/salvage one of the machines before-- im giving him a phone#but it's also just one of those “zenos is a self made prodigy” kind of things that I really enjoy#which makes the decision of dropping the old model of the garlean reaper in Ala Mhigo kinda funny to me#we really mightve just stolen this man's depression fixer-upper#(but also a little sad because it makes me think that he's tried --a lot-- of things trying to make himself happy and it just never worked)#theres probably a lot of things he knows how to do but just doesnt bother with them anymore
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I think you’re wasting yourself. I’m a hardcore feedism fetishist, I have always been. The thing is that nowadays feedees aren’t feedees anymore they’re all gainers or people with food disorders. There’s no shared experience anymore.
You regularly talk about being someone’s feedee wife but don’t you think that a feeder husband would want to enjoy the process as well ? A process which you are already going through on your own and thus not sharing it with someone ?
first—not having a current feeder does not make someone any less of a feedee. in fact, you must be comfortable with being fat alone in order to have any strength as a fat person/feedee, imo. otherwise you get people that hate themselves the moment they don’t have someone to rely on.
second—do you know how hard it is to find someone in this fetish?? lol!!!! i’ve had several odd feedist relationships. i don’t enjoy being public about this on tumblr because some people get weird as fuck about it. parts of the gain have very much been a shared experience 🤷♀️ i would love to have shared it with someone consistently but it just hasn’t worked out so far.
plus… i’m like halfway thru my gain, lol. i want to be BIG. if anything, my size now dissuades those that wouldn’t want to be with me at those higher weights. i count it as a good thing—my time won’t be wasted, i am not wasting myself.
#i’ve had feeders lol#i don’t share any of that here#shit always comes up and ngl i’m sad about it#but i also really like my current weight and i enjoy being fat#i don’t want to lose weight because some imaginary person might want me at 250. lmfao#and if someone thinks the way anon does i wouldn’t fuck w them anyways#talk#ask
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I just finished reading the 2016 Batman run for funsies and I haven’t had the time to touch it yet.
Bruce;
falls from the moon (and survives)
goes through hundreds of dimensions to fight The “Joker” that Makes Other Jokers
gets shot near the heart at least 4 times, gets his hand cut off, stabbed through the chest, all while barely even functioning and still kicking ass
f ights alternate versions of his rogues gallery (and some of his friends) all of whom are more insane/mentally broken/venomed tf up. Again, while barely functioning
Utilizes a bat uniform from The Dark Knight Returns Universe, the utility belt of Adam West’s Batman, and uses shark repellant against a giant shark with joker paint on it that’s devouring the concept of Gotham.
I’m not even touching the failsafe comic intricacies where he gets blasted into another dimension, nearly all of his buddies get their shit rocked by robots made a suppressed alternate personality of himself made in case Batman went too far and killed someone (it was staged. Copplepot died). And so much more.
The very rough notes I gave were summarizing 10 total comics.
When I tell you that literally anyone from the DC universe wouldn’t bat an eye at Danny’s history, stories, rogues gallery, the fights he’s had, everything. I mean it
They’d absolutely be devistated a kid had to do so much at so young and deal with that much pressure as a child. But they damn sure wouldn’t be shocked. This is simply them doing the rounds of figuring out a new hero and their motivations
#bones speaks#the comics I read were Batman (2016) 125 to 135.#he fell from the fucking moon#also Robin wore the stupidest fucking suit I’ve ever seen the R covered his torso AND legs#I really enjoy 136. Bruce devistated that Selina didnt tell him penguin faked his death#that’s the comic where everyone was reposting the batfam eating breakfast at Wayne manor and bringing Jason as well#im doing this because there was that sad Tim getting hugged in the rain panel being thrown around bc Bruce kicked the kids shit in#and I 100% believe it’s bc no one actually read the comic and who did it was either Zurr En Arrh#or it’s Bruce doing his best to get away from his kids and home before he hurts anyone#bones writes in the tags#bones prompts#dpxdc#danny phantom#dp x dc
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so five and lila being a thing is going right next to allison literally sexually assaulting luther in the box of things we are absolutely under no circumstances accepting as part of canon right
#tw sa mention#cw sa mention#would love if when yall reblog this you could tag with tw or cw sa mention to keep things safe!!#i actually enjoyed s4 and thought the ending was perfect to be so real#s3 really lowered my expectations lmao#tua#tua season 4#tua spoilers#the umbrella academy#s4 was fun they flubbed so many storylines but it was fun and emotional and klaus got a ton of comic book moments and there was bonding#it was fun ok#honestly in my head s3 wasn’t even canon like the timeline split#sometimes s2 isn’t even canon to me but it’s so fucking fun#it’s all fun and fucking sad and goddammit i liked it more than s3 maybe because there was less incest the bar is really low huh#unless u subscribe to the technically all the kids r biologically related thing (i do) in which case lila/diego & lila/five are also incest#but for this show ‘we may kind of be biologically related bc of magic but we don’t have the same last name & dad & childhood home’ is a win#anyway i love klaus always everyday i love them they’re everything to me#i honestly just really let myself enjoy this season bc it’s the last one and i’ve been through hell#klaus hargreeves#five hargreeves#allison hargreeves#lila pitts#luther hargreeves#reginald hargreeves#diego hargreeves#yeet my deet
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honestly the more i think about Hal as an often homeless, broke, frequently unemployed, felon who’s constantly five bad days away from a mental breakdown the less funny jokes about him being constantly belittled and bullied by the multi billionaire personally funding the justice league really are.
#Hal jordan#bruce Wayne#No hate to people who enjoy it#but in context it’s honestly really sad#Anti Bruce wayne#batman#green lantern#I think it’s because people see him as cocky and confident but this is the guy haunted by visions of his father saying he’s a reckless idio#Who would never amount to anything#i do agree they probably dislike each other which is funny but the fandom has clearly chosen a side her#And his only trump card is he has powers but lanterns are the only ones who legally can’t use powers for personal gai
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SASA'S TOP 5 QLS OF 2024
Love for Love's Sake 연애 지상주의 구역 / My Stand-In ���ัวนาย ตัวแทน / The Time of Fever 내 손끝에 너의 온도가 닿을 때 / Century of Love ปาฏิหาริย์รักร้อยปี / Spare Me Your Mercy การุณยฆาต
#in release order#love for love's sake#my stand in#my stand in the series#the time of fever#century of love#spare me your mercy#sasa gifs#tag game#technically#top 5 qls of 2024#special mention to my top 3 non qls of the year: death's game / ready set love / furitsumore kodokuna shi yo#i've barely watched anything else this year and it felt sad to make a post with only 3 shows so in the tags they go#also special mention to pb for the blorbos + the sign for how fun it was to watch every week#to affair bc of how insane wanpleng are#and love sick 2024 just because <3#cherry magic th was already in my top shows of 2023 which is why it's not here and i'm so happy i put it there so quickly bc i was RIGHT#but i'm not putting any unfinished shows on my list this year bc that was the only one i was right about lol#just know i'm really really enjoying your sky it does something to my brain that i can't explain
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its my birthday i get to decide what ship i post (spoiler alert its VHAD)
(bonus under cut)
its 4am so heres them eeping :3
#I don't talk abt vhad as much as I used to#WHICH IS SAD because the show's ending made this so much funnier#I still love these two to death. even if i usually ramble abt the other dorks these two love sdlklfjkldsfjsdf#frankly i enjoy how the show ended with the canonical fact that they hang out by virtue of having mutual friends#I really do think the one scene where Thad opens his mouth to say smth and then gets smacked over the head is targeted at me specifically /#but for real these two are so much funnier now-a-days#i still hope for a season 2 where these two interact#not like romantically but like. as a horrible duo of all time#anyway its lates and i need sleep for BirthDay Activities.#thanks for reading!! <3#murder drones#serial designation v#murder drones thad#md thad#vhad#killingblonde#hehehehehehehe these two#these are rough because im eepy
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Reverse!Gavin
#detroit become human#gavin reed#i read a lot of fics with the role swap and when a few described his attire it was like white cyberlife hoodie#and i refuse to believe he would wear white as an outer color but! i do like the idea of a white underside to his jacket#with hood included because i like hoodies#and since i dont really pay attention to if there are pristine cyberlife jackets worn that would have brown#i gave him black instead then used the brown of his leather jacket on his shoes#so that he still has that color somewhere#also i know lots of fics like to have lore as to why nines is nicknames nines but idk if ive seen any#that are like what if gavin just dubbed his human partner nines and when asked about it#hes like i might have a super brain but fuck it if im using storage to remember someones name if theyre gonna dump me later#and so thats his ninth partnership and then it lasts woohoo (i wish i could write more confidently lmao)#also also points to the scar on his nose and then points to sixtys forehead theyre friends (well granted ive never seen a role swap fic#that involved sixty but thats completely irrelevant its why i think gavin would have a kind of kinship with sixty in base bc oh huh#android healed not perfectly thats mighty fine by me)#theres more i can add to that but wont#enjoy android gavin i guess#sad i drew him in a way you cant see his mood light led but its blue here
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i have been a ball of depression lately as well as my physical health worsening pretty severly this past week due to stress and so my friends have been. trying so hard to get me to get out and do things and its very sweet but i feel bad because the whole time i’m just a total mess
#they say they dont mind but i need to really. stop#im stuck.#and i know it’s hard on my friends to see me like this since i’ve been doing a lot better and now am back to my old habits#but i felt bad because they took me out shopping and to dinner tonight and i just had a headache and was limping and couldnt stop talking#about the recent death in my family and all the stress from classes and socially and how lost i feel#and i just wanted so bad to just. enjoy myself but i couldnt#but my friends know about how severe my depression is and are all very used to it#its in fact more normal than not. but i was really. feeling at my best for several months so the crash back down to not eating and sleeping#and being unable to fully tidy my room and all that stuff has been. difficult for me as well as those around me#it’s been normal for me for so long to live terribly that taking care of myself for a while and then losing the drive to has been. hard#im trying to get better but i slide back down#i need to work on my constant self loathing but i keep walking around just. conviced im such a burden and being sad makes it even worse#i just. am always overcompensating for my lack of#ability to love myself with just. constantly showering everyone around me with love and its. hard for me when i dont have the energy to do#even that anymore. its hard to let people take care of me when i just want to take care of them all the time
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