#rvb as images i found

[localsnuny]

happy pride month

[agentark]

see you around, rvb

[cpttucker]

my tattoos pinterest board is so unclear to the outsider. but i know exactly what i intended by all of them

[theredkennedys]

my au my rules. this au is literally called Chucker Spiderverse AU in the archived discord thread so be warned oooOoOOoooOo . gay men OoooooOo

writing out the backstory that me and my friend Donut have been working on for the better part of a year, most of it was inspired by the new itsv movie that was released then. and because I don't plan on writing anything huge for this I'd like my brainstorming to have a wider audience.

All art posted is most likely @franklindonuts , aka Donut the cocreator of this shit,,,hey buddy😆 go show him some love pleeeease

you can see my art of this au here

this will 100% be somewhat incomprehensive but hey I'm just a fag having fun and I was born yesterday🧚‍♀️

**

Tucker is the spiderman in his universe with Church as his "guy in the chair". (Putting it out there that this Church is Alpha, which is significant later on.)

They both share an apartment, I don't think I ever specified why but probably for school reasons. They're both young adults, I want to say around 19-21, similar to their Blood Gulch years.

Tucker loves being spiderman. He loves helping people, being almost an idol for people- a lot of jokes were thrown around about that:

Imagine Tucker after he got his sword. He has a genuine purpose now and he's going to be good at it.

but goddd Tucker is Tucker and is stupid and reckless. being spiderman doesn't make him invincible but he loves to think otherwise. he pushes himself too far too often because he knows if he doesn't he wouldn't be able to sleep at night if someone got hurt when he was taking it "easy". Church knows this but he's still pissed off when Tucker comes back bloodied and bruised from a Villain of the Week that he shouldn't have taken on :/

(Donut art)

mental illness

It's literally just the Spiderman Effect. No one will Ever be able to understand what it's like to be spiderman but other spiders, regardless of how much you tell them or show them, they won't get it. and Church doesn't Get it. He's not stupid, he understands WiTh GrEaT PoWeR y'know but there's a mental toll that can't be communicated in a way that makes sense :/

regardless, Church hates it but he also hates how much he cares about Tucker. Cocreator said that he figured they were both close and willing to become A Thing but the time was never right, and Tucker was scared of liking a dude, etc. Normal stuff between these two. But they're insanely close, I'd like to think even moreso after Tucker's whole spiderman thing and the fact that Church also has to realize that Tucker is not invincible.

(despite them not being A Thing, Donut art of The Spiderman kiss and other gay shit)

Now this is the kicker of why I said to take note of the fact this is Alpha Church specifically.

Now I'm aware of the clowning on the whole "canon event" thing and some people's opinion on it (mostly that it's dumb and cliche), but I find it a very unique and convenient way to give a character a significant plot boost.

That being said, Tucker's "canon event" is Church's death.

I don't ever think I solidified how/why he dies, moreso that it's just a wrong-place wrong-time type of thing. Some brainstorming from Donut about it:

but i never asked him for elaboration so I don't know what the fuck he's talking about. anyway

Tucker finds Church similar to how Miles found Peter in the first Spiderverse movie. He doesn't know what to do. He's frantic and scared and horrified that his best friend is coughing up blood with raspy breaths.

(Alpha s10 parallel with tex lalalala)

Obviously. Obbbviousllyy Tucker is distraught and inconsolable. Something something he has the Worst depression of his life. He doesn't know what to do with himself, the one person who knew about everything is gone, and I'm sorry (not) lol but it's not like in rvb where Church revives 8 times before dying like a normal person.

Church was always there for Tucker and he's at a loss of what to do now because, despite the threat of it, he should've never died. It wasn't even a concern in his head ever because it seemed so unlikely.

Tucker doesn't know what to do with himself, he wouldn't have gotten this far without Church. But really, it was All Tucker. All Church did was give him little tech bits to help him function better but it was All Tucker. But he isn't able to realize that through everything and it ruins him.

I will have to make a continuation post because I love adding images and Just hit the mobile limit🧚‍♀️

thanks for reading if you got this far

[astral-gambit]

Noble Life Headcanon - Heights part 1: Freelancers

So one of the first things I had wanted to figure out was how tall the other Freelancers were next to Six. I first looked on the RvB Fandom wiki to see if there was any heights. There wasn't, so I went to find a good picture of all the main Freelancers standing together, and this is the one I picked to work with.

I loaded it into Clip Studio and added a height cart to it and lined the bottom of it up to the first 'level' of boots. North, Carolina, Wash, CT, and Florida aren't on that line, and South and York are crouched down. So I added a grid as well and figured out where South and York would stand at full height then lined everyone up on the chart.

And I quickly came to the realization that this wasn't the was to do it, at least not with this chart. Because there is no way that I'm the same height as Maine, there is no way that he's 5 foot 1. I refuse.

So I scrapped that method and worked on a different method. I can't tell you how I got the heights I did, cause I didn't write it down. I guess I just worked around Six's known height and still based on the picture, trying to keep the heights in line with the image, I found the height I liked the most.

Here are the heights I see the known Freelancers as, the first height is when/if they're out of their armor, and the second height is while in their armor which I think adds three inches.

Maine - 8'3" / 8'6" North - 6'9" / 7' Wash - 6'9" / 7' Wyoming - 6'9" / 7' York - 6'8" / 6'11" Noble Six/West Virginia - 6'6" / 6'9" Tex - 6'5" / 6'8" Carolina - 6' / 6'3" South - 5'10" / 6'1" Florida - 5'8" / 5'11" CT - 5'8" / 5'11"

There we go, I've had these headcanons for a year or more, and I'm glad to finally have the story going and to be sharing it all. I hope you like this and the ones to come.

[fancoloredglasses]

Red vs. Blue (so...why ARE we here?)

(Thanks to TheRedBase)

[All images are owned by Rooster Teeth Productions. Please don’t sue me]

Now, those who are fans will complain that Red vs. Blue (or RvB) is still airing new episodes, so I shouldn’t be reviewing it. However, I have two arguments to that:

1. This wouldn’t be the first time I’ve reviewed something still current.

(b) Rooster Teeth is no longer airing new episodes of RvB. They’re airing episodes of spin-off series.

First, a bit of back story...

The company that would eventually be known as Rooster Teeth was founded by Michael “Burnie” Burns and Matt Hullum. Back then, it was known as Drunk Gamers, and they would review video games after having more than a few drinks. Naturally, most video game companies didn’t want to give them games to review with a name like that (not to mention most banks didn’t want to lend money to a company based on the consumption of several adult beverages), so they changed the name to Rooster Teeth (which was a work-safe parallel to “cock bite”)

About this time, Bungie had created a first-person shooter franchise for the X-Box known as Halo (maybe you’ve heard of it?) While the first game was critically acclaimed, it was the second game that ties in to our story. One feature in Halo 2 was a multiplayer arena. While this sort of thing is commonplace now, it was still fairly new at the time. It was possible to link several X-Boxes together and play with each player on their own screen so other players couldn’t “peek” at where their opponents were since they were all sharing a screen (granted having all those X-Boxes and all those TVs was expensive, but STILL...)

Burns and Hullum (and their friends that were hired, including Gustavo “Gus” Sorola, and Geoff Ramsey) took advantage of this and, with Bungie’s blessing, jumped on a new sort of “filmmaking” this new technology made possible: machinema (making films in multiplayer games, usually with one player dedicated as the “cameraman”)

That’s why the first couple of seasons have that circle in the center of the shot; that’s the targeting area for the cameraman’s weapon.

Anyway, RvB told the tale of a civil war between two sides: the Red Army and the Blue Army, or at least one battlefield in the war: a box canyon on an unpopulated world known as Blood Gulch. (well, that’s how it started anyway) Why is a box canyon have such strategic importance? They never say.

[I would like to note that, since this is a video game, all of the characters look exactly the same except for the color of their armor. The only way to tell who’s actually speaking was for the “actor” controlling the character to quickly look up and down so the character bobbed their head.]

Now, let’s meet our total fucking idiots brave warriors, starting with Red Team.

Red team is led by Sarge (full name, Sgt. Sarge. If ever there was anyone born to do his job...) Sarge is totally gung-ho about the military life and is all for taking down “those no good dirty Blues!” Too bad he has no clue how to do his job, often rejecting common sense plans that would likely work in favor of the most recklessly violent plan he can come up with.

Sarge’s second-in-command is Pvt. Dick Simmons. Simmons is the closest thing Blood Gulch has to an IT guy and is a total suck-up to Sarge.

Pvt. Dexter Grif is the low man in the unit and is often the recipient of abuse from Sarge (most of Sarge’s plans involve Grif being horribly wounded, if not killed) Part of that may stem from Grif being the laziest soldier ever and likely at least 50 pounds overweight.

Finally, we have Lopez the Heavy, an android who serves as the mechanic for the Team, and is likely the smartest being in the canyon. Due to a malfunction, he can only speak Spanish.

Now let’s go to Blue Team...

The leader of the Blues (mainly due to being the loudest) is Pvt. Leonard L. Church. He’s about as clueless as the rest, but has the biggest potty mouth of the bunch.

The other member of Blue Team (wait, there are only two blues to Red Team’s four? Why the hell hasn’t Sarge ordered a full frontal assault (with Grif in front, naturally)? I mean...sure Grif might die, but I’m sure that’s a risk Sarge is willing to take!) is Pvt. Lavernius Tucker. Tucker fancies himself a ladies man, never missing an opportunity to lay down some innuendo. (bow chicka bow wow)

Early on, both sides got some new additions...

The Reds got a recruit named Pvt. Franklin Delano Donut. Yes, he has pink (or as he calls it “lightish red”) armor. I’m pretty sure he’s not actually gay, but he’s very effeminate and makes a lot of accidental homoerotic double entendres.

Meanwhile, the Blues got a tank (with an AI named Sheila) as well as a new recruit.

Pvt. Michael J. Caboose (played by Joel Hayman) is...well, he’s a complete fucking idiot (even compared to the rest; there is no way to sugar-coat it) who is convinced Church is his Bestest Friend In The Whole Wide Universe. What’s more, he’s a danger to anyone on his side (especially Church)

(Thanks to ChaosAsakura)

As a result of Caboose’s little “accident”...

...Church came back as a ghost and...

...Blue Command sent a mercenary named Tex (AKA Agent Texas AKA Allison (no last name given)), who is Church’s ex. She also has an evil AI in her armor that eventually gets loose.

...and all of that is just season one!

Now, around Season 3, Halo 3 was released, so...

The gang got an upgrade (and continue to get them with every new game)!

Now, there are 4 “eras” of RvB

Season 1-5 are known as The Blood Gulch Chronicles, and center almost exclusively in Blood Gulch (with a quick stop in a different map to explain the upgrades)

Seasons 6-10 are known as Project Freelancer, which gives a bit of backstory on the Reds and Blues, as well as Tex’s origin, and introduces members of an elite (and defunct) unit known as Project Freelancer: Carolina and Washington (or “Wash” to his friends). This also marks when Rooster Teeth started using motion capture technology to enhance the action sequences for the series instead of using machinema exclusively.

Seasons 11-13 are known as The Chorus Trilogy, which sees the Reds and Blues drawn into another civil war.

Seasons 15-17 are known as The Shisno Trilogy, which involves the Reds and Blues traveling to their past.

Season 18 was its own storyline, while season 14 was a series of “alternate reality” shorts (including an episode where the Red and Blues end in the Rooster Teeth offices). Following Season 18, Burnie Burns left Rooster Teeth to pursue other projects and Joel Hayman was fired due to making some inappropriate tweets (which violated company policy) in 2020.

So, with the actor playing Tucker the only Blue still with the company, I guess the Reds won...?

But this isn’t the end of Red vs. Blue, as there was a spin-off series with an all-new crew, as well as occasional “PSAs” from the remains of the original cast.

(Thanks to Rooster Teeth)

In addition, Rooster Teeth recently announced the final season (with Burnie Burns returning) this fall.

I should note that every episode is under 10 minutes long and, once a “season” is finished, Rooster Teeth splices them together into a continuous film and releases it on DVD. The DVD’s extras (starting with season 2) give a highlight reel of the story thus far.

The one on Season 5′s DVD sums up the Blood Gulch Chronicles rather well...

(Thanks to SystemFreaKk13)

If you would like to watch the series, it’s available on Rooster Teeth’s website, as well as YouTube.

At this point, I normally would be fishing for requests for episode reviews, but given how the series is laid out, that’s not exactly possible.

[funsizedcrow]

whys armor so hard to draw >:(

[niqhtlord01]

Hi hi, what inspired you to make the humans are weird series?

I'd like to first say that though many of my stories are from that genre, it was around long before I came along. It would be a disservice to those writers before me to claim that I invented it; I just loved it so much I found a home writing within the genre. As for what inspired me to carve out that nice little corner of the internet for my stories that's a different tale. I was going through a tough time a few years ago since I'd been let go from my previous job and the job search wasn't working in my favor. Weeks turned into months with no luck and I started getting depressed and soo I started wandering through the internet to pass the time. I came upon several scifi stories about aliens interacting with humans before and reading them helped perk me up some. I never started a blog before so I thought I could give it a shot to keep me busy while I kept on my job search so I started writing here. I first did short skits with writing mortal kombat style dialogue for Rooster Teeth characters from the franchises like RWBY, RVB, and Gen:Lock. Once I saw that people were finding my little snippets fun to read I thought I'd expand into creating my own stories, so I took a step into the humans are weird genre. I still remember my first story about a human diplomat who beat a psychic controlling alien by trapping them in their mind and then torturing them with their love for graphic horror movies as payback for brainwashing their friend. After that I set out and started making more and more of my own stories. Sometimes they were honorable homages to existing characters with a different spin, such as the Assassin series with the main character being inspired by Garak from Deep Space 9, and others I created from scratch like the gangster Jimmy and his quest to build a criminal empire on a distant alien world, or the diplomatic weavings of Earl Von Morgan and his growing love for an alien representative Tilith. My favorite personal project though is the story of the mercenary leader Mr. B, a massive walking shark man, and the little girl who helped save him from slavery Lizzy. I commissioned several artists to bring their characters to life in image and it was worth every penny to see them. To better motivate myself I started a patreon were people get first hand exclusives to stories ahead of time before they get released here and can also make suggestions for stories or ask for further expansions of existing stories.

In the end what started out as a side project came to play a large part of my day to day life now and I could not be happier for it. Reading the comments, likes, and shares from everyone here brings a smile to my face. I look forward to continuing with my stories for you to read long into the future, and I hope you enjoy the ride :3

[scribbleboxfox]

Okay question

How the FUCK do you give rvb ocs armor

I made 3 rvb ocs completely on impulse inspired by TLRH and I'm in hell (Their names are Crusader, Viper and Bombastic btw). How do you do this /gen

Ok first of all you HAVE to tell me about your OC's sometime!! Second, this is gonna be a long-winded answer, so I apologize in advance lol.

From a Character Design Standpoint:

When I came up with the characters I made for TLRH, I had a general idea of what their personalities would be like, and used that as a reference point for what THEY should look like.

For example, I knew I wanted Fox to basically be Kimball's polar opposite in terms of personality and methodology. Kimball has a more "hearts and minds" philosophy (imo) and Fox has a more "shock and awe" philosophy. So I decided to give Fox armor that reflected their differences.

Fox's armor is dark and pointy. Kimball's is light and curved. Both of them have the light blue markings, however, because they both hold leadership positions.

You can kinda see the differences in this (very old) drawing of them together.

From a Technical Standpoint:

When coming up with armor, I'll usually just google "Halo 4 armor" or something similar and look for either official concept art or 3D turn-arounds of the models found in-game. The latter can generally be found on Artstation.

I also like to kitbash armor sets like so:

This was done by grabbing pieces of armor from this poster of all the Halo 4 armor and bashing them together until I got what I wanted. This was how I came up with the armor for both Fox and Sampson. (The only downside to this method is that it's limited to only Halo 4 armor and doesn't have the Prefect or ODST armor sets.)

Honestly the hardest part of figuring out what kind of armor to give a character is learning the NAME of a particular set of armor so you can look it up on Google Images. Usually though, if you search for something like "Halo 5 helmets" you should be able to find something like this that at least gives you some names. And then you can go from there.

Here's some links that can be helpful also:

Vanity - Allows you to build a character with the armor from Halo Reach. Works similarly to a character customization screen.

405th armory - 3D models of ALL Halo armor from every game. You'll need to download and learn how to use a 3D modeling software (like Blender) to actually benefit from this link.

Also, if you're able to, buying the Master Chief collection can be a great resource too. All the games allow you to customize your Spartan so you can grab references for their armor, or just see what your character would look like! It's definitely not the cheapest option, but depending on what you're trying to do, it can be worth it.

Anyways, hope that helps! :D

[localsnuny]

lots of church in this one can u tell he's been on my mind lately

[rubykgrant]

As promised, I finally finished all my RVB pin-ups! (these are honestly pretty tame, mostly just cutesy poses and anatomy practice. I’m putting the full image under a cut below). I spent a couple of weeks drawing these, sometimes trying multiple poses until finally they looked right, and then I had to travel to scan the pictures... and the scanner was really wonky. It washed out certain colors, while over-saturating others. It was just really weird. So, the only solution was to try to edit and fix the scanned images on my computer, and since I only have MS Paint with no layers, this was a challenge. I basically had to add the colors, then go over my lines so they would be clear, and finally erase around the edges. It took another few days to fix them all, but I did it!

Here is Agent Washington~

We never got a good look at Wash back in Project Freelancer, but at some point, somebody came up with blonde-freckle-man, and a lot of us latched onto it. I am no exception... and I really went all-out with his freckles! It was once mentioned that he grew a beard, so I decided to keep that. It is a little more full and fluffy than I usually draw it, but hey- maybe he’s growing it out a bit. That foot ticked me off, but whatever, I’m done with it. Also, yes; I gave him a catboy pose~

I imagine Wash also being tall, and fairly lean. Certainly athletic, but also agile. The dude has also been all over the map in terms of his character arc; Freelancer Dork, Mr Serious Recovery One, Villain Guy, Church Impersonator, and finally- a dork yet again, but now he’s more comfortable to be one! After living with the Reds and Blues, he’s found a way to sort of... not feel awkward about being awkward? It makes sense when you know this group. Also, I’m not sure how much I would elaborate on it in my story-line... but I kinda lean toward trans Wash 

[riathedreamer]

Zero is Null

A discussion of Zero’s love-hate-relationship with RvB and struggling independence; including a hotdog too big for the bun, tragic backstories, a single bow-chicka-bow-wow, and a cookie at the very end.

Welcome to what will be a lot of text. Basically, it will explore why Zero fails as an RvB (with emphasis on RvB) season. I will not be the first one to bring forth some of the points, and I promise to be fair and civil and fun. This isn’t supposed to be a piece of hate – in fact, I’m writing this because I love Red vs. Blue.

Okay, first of all, to increase your fun – take a guess on just how much of Zero is spent on fight scenes. You see, I’ve calculated the exact amount, and I will reveal it later, but for now, take a guess and remember the number. Maybe you are the winner!

Alright, time to share my thoughts. Wait! Since I suffer from anxiety and have this one annoying voice pretending to be all those critical statements my opinion could be met with, let’s give it an actual voice and address the points throughout this review.

“Why would I care about your opinion, Ria?” – I don’t know, you’re the one who clicked Read More.

“Your opinion doesn’t matter!” – Of course, it doesn’t! Geez. Do you think your opinion matters, though? Listen, we’re on Tumblr, the actual equivalent of screaming into the void. And it’s fun, too!

“If you don’t like it, don’t watch!” - *activates Uno Reverse Card* “You can’t talk about something you haven’t watched!”

“You’re just a Hater” – Actually, this is a point I’ll come back to. Like a cliffhanger. Also, at the end of this, there’ll be a cookie. But this will also include me talking about the stuff I like, because, surprise, Zero is not without talent!

“You just don’t like it because the Reds and Blues aren’t in it!” – Actually, that’s a good point, so instead, this review will start with a sole focus on Zero and discuss the problem that lies within that story. Then we can address why the lack of OG cast is understandable and problematic and weird.

But first! Backstory.

When the first 5 second teaser dropped back in spring (you know, when we were young and innocent and the world didn’t feel like an apocalyptic movie yet), I held onto that one image of what I thought (hoped) to be Grif and Simmons in the sunset, hopefully addressing Grif’s hateglue arc, but boy was I wrong because a) that’s not Simmons, that’s Sarge, and b) the image was from a PSA since the Reds are not in Zero.

Actual face-reveal of me below:

Admittedly, when I heard that the Reds and Blues were not going to be the main characters (or even show up), it felt like a gut punch. However, I actually found myself getting excited due to the creators’ hype. I want to praise them for this. It’s been a while since an RvB season was talked so much ABOUT before its release; it had advertisements, it had creators and voice-actors talking about it. Please. More of that in the future. Their passion rubbed off on me, and that deserves recognition. So it pains me that this was clearly a passion-project, and then when I gave it a try, I didn’t want to touch it again for weeks.

Here’s the thing. I cannot whole-heartedly say that Zero is bad. It’s not gonna melt your eyes. It’s not even so-bad-it’s-good. For me, it’s meh. It’s a Saturday-morning-cartoon aimed for a younger audience with a rushed plot and clichéd characters. The problem is that it calls itself RvB, and with that title comes something to live up to – but more importantly, something to continue.

My main issue is that Zero forces its story into existence by ignoring established content rather than adjusting to it. Let’s call this for the hotdog-too-big-for-the-bun syndrome solely for the sake of the bow-chicka-bow-wow that’s coming now. Bow-chicka-bow-wow. Many of the separate issues I will dive into all add to this hotdog-issue, so I will scream “Hotdog!” whenever this is the case so we can all keep track of my argument.

You can continue the story of Red vs. Blue without the Reds and Blues. While that would personally crush my heart, it can be done. There’s a story of Red vs. Blue that can be continued. The world can be expanded, the previous actions of the Reds and Blues can be explored from another angle.

So.

How does Zero do this? It doesn’t.

I just want to make it clear that new elements can definitely be added when it comes to worldbuilding. That’s literally the point of sequels. But Zero’s settings are presented with so little grace and with no connection to previously established worldbuilding. We get Alliance of Defense and GLASS thrown in our face as very big important organizations – yet we’ve never heard of them before. A big central plot point of RvB is the UNSC and Project Freelancers, and those were introduced naturally with the plot. We already have big established intergalactic organizations. What is AOD’s connection with those? We aren’t told. We are just told they exist and expected to accept it, no questions asked. If this was a whole new world and story – fine. But when you need to build on an already established worldbuilding, you need more grace than this. Chorus was a whole new setting, but it was explained, and it was connected to the previous plot. Same with Iris. Same with Desert Gulch. In Zero, it feels lazy. It feels forced. These organizations are just there because the story is built around them (HOTDOG).

This vagueness when it comes to wordbuilding is also reflected in the settings - we have a desert, a training base, a lab, temples, Tucker’s workplace, and we do not know if all those are set place on the same planet. If that is the case, what is this planet’s relationship with Chorus? Is it Earth? And most importantly, what is the deal with the temples? Why are they connected to Tucker’s sword if it isn’t the same planet. Are they made by the same aliens? Are people okay with this? Why haven’t these temples been explored before? Chorus makes sure to establish this, while Zero doesn’t, adding to a growing amount of confusion.

Okay, so no connection with previous worldbuilding. What about characters? I mean, we got Wash and Carolina and Tucker! So we have RvB characters, it gotta be RvB! Technically – yeah. But it feels dirty. These three characters are not here to be characters. They are here to be props to the new cast. They are not given any development. Their presence isn’t even that important, and if this was a whole new show, they could easily have been replaced with an unknown face. Worst of all, they feel miswritten.

Carolina and Wash are working at a new military organization? Leaving the Reds and Blues behind? To help people? First of all, fucking bad idea, Carolina, the last time you left the Reds and Blues alone, they changed the timeline. But most importantly – Carolina and Wash just joined this new super elite military organization? After being mistreated and manipulated by such an organization in the past?

Carolina is there to introduce the characters. That’s it. We are force-fed their personality by having her literally read out loud their personality. There is no gentle introduction to the new cast. We are not allowed to get to know them naturally. Why show when you can tell, huh? That’s Carolina’s role. That’s why she is there. To introduce the cast and explain their story. That’s it. (HOTDOG).

How about Wash? He is there to get beat up and be a damsel in distress so that the new cast has a reason to explore the plot. Oh, and that brain damage that was the consequence of previous seasons – gone now. The guy who literally has trauma from having an AI explode inside his head is fine with having a computer inserted into it instead. Because that’s needed. To explore his brain damage wouldn’t work now when his role is to be a prop to lure the new cast for one episode and then be put onto the bench for the rest of the runtime (HOTDOG).

And Tucker – he is there to die for a second and have his sword taken from him. That’s literally it. And for the few moments he is there, he feels like old super flirty Tucker, which erases the character development he went through in previous seasons. Okay, so Tucker dies, and then not dies, and then he is put on the bench with Wash where they can sit and talk or whatever (‘cause holy shit, the new cast is not allowed to that), because he isn’t important. The sword is. Tucker is just a prop, even more than his sword is (HOTDOG).

Damn. Wash gets beat up. Tucker gets beat up. Dies. Gets his sword taken away. Almost seems like a Red’s wet dream. Sorry not sorry, Blues, you were done dirty.

So there are miswritten old characters. Even worse is the retconning. The plot needs a “normal” Wash, so, bam, magic computer solution. Never mind Wash’s trauma and character traits. Never mind the logic of the new worldbuilding which also includes a character suffering for years to heal an illness. But the brain damage that was such a big consequence that it became the main part of the plot of the last two seasons – gone. I mean, a gunshot to the head can be healed by CPR. That’s canon. But no one gave Wash CPR so it’s a big thing, okay. It was canonically a big thing, and Zero erased that. This is not me saying that a Cerebral Enhancer couldn’t work in the RvB universe. Imagine it being done right. Wash struggling with the choice of getting used to his disability or accepting the possibility of help - at the cost of reliving his trauma. The struggle between what to choose - what should he choose when he wants to help as many as possible, the sacrifices he thinks he has to make, the way it could have been used as a part of his character growth. But in Zero, the enhancer isn’t a part of Wash’s character. It’s there so the story can work without having to deal with the previous plot’s consequence (HOTDOG).

Same with the sword thing. They sorta explain it by having Tucker flatline, but it’s weak. Honestly, I find it sorta offensive. What about Locus’ sword as well? It’s twisting previous lore to make the new plot work (HOTDOG). (Also, are we not gonna talk about the ultimate power being Spencer Porkensenson’s helmet? Have the writers forgotten Spencer Porkensenson? Have we as a community forgotten Spencer Porkensenson?)

If you have Red vs. Blue in your title, you cannot ignore what you inherit from it. You need to respect the worldbuilding, the established characters, and the previous plot. Zero does not do this.

Let’s talk about the Triplets. No, really, let’s do it. I don’t think I’ve ever talked about them before, because season 14 was a mixed bag for me (that I have now learned to appreciate. Thank you, Zero.) because I have heart at the size of the Grinch and can only love a few characters at a time, and that did not include the Triplets. Can’t even remember their names. Well, I can, but I can’t for the love of me remember which state is which, and my tongue is twisted every time I try to say Ohio, Iowa, and Idaho, and I know it’s on purpose. I know it is. And it got me good. That being said, the fandom actually embraced them really, really well! Seriously, I’ve seen more content for the Triplets than for Zero as a whole.

Why talk about the Triplets? (Was Iowa the lesbian? Or was it Ohio? Fuck.) Because like Zero, they introduced new characters with a story of their own. The Reds and Blues didn’t play a role. But here’s what I feel like the Triplets got right. They didn’t change the settings to force their narrative. They used stuff already established (Project Freelancer), added their own story as a continuation of that. They even included old characters in the beginning (Wash and some other Freelancers) but it felt natural and it didn’t feel like it happened at the expense of the old characters. Wash’s writing felt natural, and his presence wasn’t needed to tell these new character’s stories. He wasn’t a prop to them. He was there to establish the setting and to establish the relationship with these new characters, and then he and the other familiar faces (helmets??) left, and we as the viewers were left with these new characters. And the new characters told their own story by themselves. It felt like, hey, here’s something you know – remember Mother of Invention, and remember Wash’ lower rank, but now, try to imagine being even lower rank than him, aren’t you curious about those fates? Now let’s hear their story! It was new, it was something else, but it didn’t wreck what came before it, and it stayed true to the classic vibes of RvB.

As I said before, the hotdog-issue is my biggest problem with Zero. It infuriates me. I will return to this. But there are more issues, even if we try to look past the title-related problems.

If we try to imagine Zero as its own story and universe (as it should be, in my opinion), it still earns the meh review from me.

These isolated issues include awkwardness, the writing, lack of self-awareness, and pacing. First of all, holy shit, this is a tell, don’t show. Nothing is subtle, nothing is allowed to develop. It’s like the show thinks you are six years old with an attention span of a goldfish. You are not just led by the hand – they have literally pulled off your arm by the end of the show. We are force-fed every bit of information, every bit of personality from these new characters.

The voice-acting is a mixed bag for me. Sometimes it’s pretty good, sometimes it’s not. Some of the problems can definitely be blamed on the dialogue that you can only do so much with. It’s not good. I can’t remember any good jokes (the one joke I really appreciate was the cast on armor, and that was freaking visual humor. That was so RvB. Kudos to that. It was fun. More of that, please.), and RvB is known for having memorably good lines. This is a show built on good, clever, funny dialogue. Zero does not deliver. You have to sit through clichéd lines – “You’re not my dad”, “I trusted you”, “Come with me”, “It can’t be!”, “She’s way too powerful”, and “We have to do this together” – performed unironically. I cringed more than I laughed. Worst thing is that Zero could be a good parody. Sometimes, it feels like it is. One-dimensional characters, a villain wanting ‘the ultimate power’, very overpowered characters, bad one-liners, etc. But Zero takes itself seriously, and I was one of the people rooting for Jax to show up at the end and yell “Cut”. That would have been a funny-as-fuck twist. A spin-off parody. If I can’t have “Sarge the Movie”, I would have taken that and loved it. I would have forgiven everything. “We put so much info into finding that power, but we had no idea what it was” is really a line in the finale, and I cannot believe this is real in a show that somehow still tries to present itself as serious. What a plot.

We have to talk about pacing. God, first of all it should be stated that RvB is a mess when it comes to pacing. I honestly get what they were going for. Sometimes, RvB has come across as a bit boring when you get three episodes stretched over three weeks without much going on. I know season 11 did not have the warmest welcome because it was seen as boring until the finale. But when you see season 11 as a whole, as a movie, as a part of a trilogy, it works so well. Zero is more focused on being episodic. They want something to happen all the time so we will stay tuned. The thing that will happen – a fight. Oh god. The fight scenes.

I have done the math. I have run the numbers. I deserve a freaking cookie for this. Are you ready?

If you put all the episodes together, you have a runtime of 106 minutes. HOWEVER, with the introduction of credits in every episode, you gotta account for this. Removing the credits, this gives us 94 minutes of actual runtime. Out of that, 45 minutes are dedicated to fight scenes. That means 48% of the show is fight scenes.

If I wanted that many fight scenes, I’d watch Death Battle. Except the actual RvB Death Battle episode has a runtime of 20 minutes, and out of that, 5 minutes is dedicated to the actual battle. For the people who hate math – that’s 25% of the actual runtime.

RvB Zero has more fight scenes than a show called Death Battle. Take that in.

The pace suffers from this. Where’s the time to explore the characters? Where’s the time for good dialogue? All I can think of is this:

I get that RvB is a show that’s literally making fun of itself by acknowledging all their characters do is stand around and talk. I get that you want characters to do more than that. But for the love of Church, would it kill the new characters to stand around and talk? For just a minute? Stop fighting, I am begging you, stop fighting! Am I a pacifist now? Am I purple? Have I joined Doc’s team? What has Zero done to me?!

The good thing though is that fight scenes are very good. They’re entertaining. However, they seem to deconstruct themselves when we need to get a fight scene in every episode. Usually, the few fight scenes in an RvB season were in some of the most climatic episodes. In Zero, I can hardly keep up with the pace because they won’t stop moving. Fight scenes aren’t plot. They aren’t character development. You need more than just fight scenes. They entertain, but there’s a limit to that.

Noël Wiggins, the co-writer, stated the inspiration was a Saturday-morning cartoon. They nailed that vibe. If that was their goal, hurray, they have accomplished something! Because of the poor plot and constant fight scenes, it feels like you could just switch on the TV and drop in at any moment and let yourself be entertained by the cool and colorful soldiers punching and kicking each other. I will admit that the fight scenes entertained me. But they don’t make it a good season.

If I were the six-year-old with the attention span of a goldfish that the show believes I am, I honestly would enjoy it. The stiff dialogue and the constant tell-don’t-show makes you feel like an audience that’s not supposed to do anything else but admire the flashy fight scenes. I miss the cleverness of RvB. I miss the characters I get to connect with as I see them grow.

I miss the tone of RvB. Because this isn’t RvB to me.

It’s not that RvB hasn’t changed its tone before. Holy shit, I sorta do want to experience the absolute shock the RvB fandom went through when s6 aired and they were given new characters and serious plot. I would have loved to experience that, but I was too busy being ten years old. The Freelancers seasons also introduced a new tone and more fight scenes with very talented fighters compared to the Blood Gulch gang, but a balance was kept by having half of the season still revolving around the Reds and Blues. But Zero – Zero is so much change. And it’s on purpose. At least this has been made very clear from the beginning.

They constantly seem to appeal to new fans, rather than be directed towards older fans of the show. If you want an entirely new audience with a season with a new cast, new worldbuilding, and new tone, I’m confused as to why they don’t just make a new show. The hotdog-problem begs for this solution. This story and environment and characters feel so out of touch with the original RvB, that with a few rewrites and lack of Halo-armor, it could just be a new show. Problem solved.

If not this, then present it as a spin-off. In all ways, it feels like a spin-off (again, see everything marked HOTDOG). But the creators refuse to do this, and I don’t understand why. I could forgive many of these issues, had they officially separated themselves from canon.

Ah, what’s the idiom? You can’t both swallow and blow? (You can hear the Bow-chicka-bow-wow in the distance). Something about eating cake and having it. Forgive me, English isn’t my native language. POINT IS why are you calling yourself RvB while actively fighting against the core essence of RvB? In my humble opinion, you can’t be both. Marketing it as a spin-off would have granted it some defense when changing, well, literally everything, and I just, would someone please properly describe why it isn’t a spin-off? Isn’t this season marked by its association with the plot of RvB rather than a continuation of it? Zero presenting itself as not a spinoff feels like a toddler clinging to the hem of its mother’s dress while forcefully running away from her, ripping the dress in the process.

When they do connect with the original RvB, it leaves a bitter taste in my mouth. When they let Carolina, Wash, and Tucker appear for a moment, it feels like luring viewers in with the RvB title. Look at me. Look at me! I’m not saying this is the case. I say that it gives me the annoying vibes of being lured, rather than letting the characters be a part of the show for their own development, rather than having RvB in the title to continue its story. I should not be getting these vibes at all. But I am.

If you want to use RvB in the title, something from the core of RvB needs to be embraced. Things can be changed. They should. Something new should be brought in. But there’s a limit to how much you can change and replace and twist until it would have been better with an original show. As a season of RvB, it should tell the story of Red vs. Blue.

From my perspective, Zero fails to do so.

It pains me that the old cast has been replaced, but as stated earlier, a season could have worked without them. However, I do not like the take that one should be excited about all the new characters. That it isn’t a big thing that the OG cast got replaced. That we should just deal with it. Just, try to imagine another show suddenly replacing the main characters with characters we’ve never met before. Imagine RWBY suddenly only focusing on a new team of huntresses with the previous main characters reduced to an Easter Egg presence, or Camp Camp suddenly being about a new team of campers, no warning given. Can you imagine the outcry? So maybe let’s agree that a replacement of the main cast is a big thing and should be addressed and it’s valid to be upset about this change.

Could Zero have worked? It’s hard to answer this. How can I accept something as RvB if the season actively pushes away the core of RvB aside for an isolated story that could have been told in any other media? As a spinoff, I could have ignored it. To enjoy Zero, I have to fully separate it from RvB in my mind, and then it’s alright. S’not good. But it’s not bad. It’s entertaining enough. I really ended up liking Raymond and Tiny, and there were a few good jokes, and the fight scenes were admirable (but too much) and I love the creators’ passion. But it’s not RvB. I also wish that the new characters had been attached to previous worldbuilding, for example soldiers on Chorus or agents from Project Freelancer. That way we could build on familiar lore which would have decreased the confusion and added a much needed connection with the previous seasons of RvB.

God, the anxious voice is back (by the way, it sounds like Tutter from “Bear in the Blue House”).

“You’re racist” – I hope not. Literally, I do not want to be. Tell me if I’ve ever crossed some lines, because I swear, that is not my intention, I will apologize and most of all, change and do better. I included this because I’ve seen this take thrown around in the big ugly mess that is the fandom clashes regarding Zero. And racism is problem within RT community (this includes AH and RvB, sorry, I just use RT as an umbrella term for the latter), and I’m not saying it hasn’t been a problem with this season. Writers should never be harassed, and never-fucking-ever because of their skin color, and voice actors shouldn’t be treated like they are responsible for the choices of the show. But I was legit nervous to post this review, and I hope it’s been factual without feeling like personal attacks on the creators because that has never been my intention. I was delighted to hear about the diversity behind this project, and Torrian’s passion legit blew me away because it’s been a while since I’ve seen that for an RvB project. I’d hoped for it to be good, and when I feel disappointed, it’s for the reasons stated in this analysis. That said, Zero is made by a diverse cast and it’s made with love, and both of those things are so, so great, but it does not mean that Zero cannot be criticized. It can, and it should. It’s a product, just like all the other seasons, and fans are allowed to discuss it – both what they loved, and both what they found troublesome. And to repeat previous points, and be respectful, always, fuck racists, and never-fucking-ever harass the staff behind a season, what the fuck is wrong with you if you do this.

“Don’t you get it, it’s different because it’s trying something new!” – Hey, remember the philosophical question: if you replace all the parts of a ship one-by-one, is it still the same ship when you’re done? If it doesn’t include the Reds and Blues, if it ignores previous plot, if the old characters feel miswritten, if it values animation over dialogue, if it values fight scenes over comedy, if it wants to be Fast and Furious instead of Red vs. Blue – is it still Red vs. Blue? Because it doesn’t feel like it to me.

“It's been 17 seasons, it’s time to let the Reds and Blues go so someone else can shine!” – I simply do not understand us having been with the Reds and Blues for 17 seasons should be an argument to let them go, rather than be an argument as to why their absence hurt like hell.

“The Reds and Blues ran out of things to do!” – Did- did they, though? I mean, if we were discussing pretty much any other show, I’d probably agree that they were running out of content. But for the Reds and Blues… I think the PSAs nailed it this year! I’m not kidding, I had more fun watching the Reds and Blues discuss how to do laundry than watching Zero. You could literally give me an hour of the Reds and Blues trying to bake a cake or clear a gutter or simply settling down with an ordinary life, and I would trust them to make it worth the watch.

“The flaws were due to the fact it’s only 8 episodes long!” – Look, I can only judge a product the way it’s presented to me. I cannot come up with excuses for it. If they had 8 episodes to work with, they need to come up with a plot that works with this runtime. Seriously, this excuse cannot work when 48% of the season is spent on fight scenes. They could have used more runtime, sure, but the show needs to be able to pace itself and be planned accordingly.

“The OG cast couldn’t be a part of this year, hence Zero!” – That might be true. But. Would one year without RvB kill it? Is Zero necessary? Again, I just can’t judge excuses for the show. But trouble with the cast has been an issue before. Season 15 solves Geoff’s sabbatical by actually making Grif’s absence a part of the plot. Zero’s lack of Reds and Blues just feels like this excuse to tell a story that needn’t be a part of RvB.

Am I a hater? I guess? I greatly dislike Zero for the critique stated above. I do, however, not harass the creators and no one should ever do that. However, I have to admit that I feel there’s been this weird rejection of any critique of Zero where everything’s been brushed off as haters gonna hate, including the critique stated above. And I think that’s a problem because critique, as hard as it can be to hear (and I know this. I’m an author of original works. Weird flex, I know), is valid and necessary and shouldn’t just be shrugged away. As always, both sides of the fandom should always be respectful, but my own opinion is that addressing the flaws of Zero should not be controversial.

Does this super long rant/critique/whatever mean you cannot enjoy Zero? Gods no! I almost envy you if you enjoy this season, but holy shit, feel free to love it and tell the creators that you love it! Me pointing out the issues I have with the season shouldn’t be stopping you. I loved (and still love) s15 when it came out, and it was majorly rejected by the fandom. There were many, many critical posts, people were going on about how RvB should have ended with s13, and it evolved into the writer receiving death threats (me, once again: never ever harass the creators, assholes). But I didn’t tell people to stop being negative. I actually agreed with many of the flaws that were pointed out, and I enjoyed the season despite this, because that is possible. We, as RvB fans, should agree that RvB, is... I mean, it’s not the greatest, most flawless of shows, but we love it nonetheless. So go ahead and love Zero. This is not a stop sign. This is my opinion that you chose to read.

Wait, I promised you a cookie, didn’t I? Well, you’re not getting one. Why? Because I’m a Red and this is my chance to piss off a Blue. As Caboose wisely said: “Well, at least I don't go around... knocking on people's non-doors... and promising them cookies... and then NOT. GIVING. THEM. COOKIES!”

Blue Team sucks.

End speech.

[a-daks]

Fyi @lexi-rhodeisland is an art reposter. Some of the art they're reposting is literally made by someone who specifically left the rvb fandom because her art was stolen and reposted so much.

Don't repost art. Don't reblog stolen art. It costs 0 dollars to reverse image search and reblog it from the source, or post only a link instead.

"I found it on pinterest/google/Instagram" isn't credit.

[marisacox123]

Nalu: Black Dragon

*I do not own Fairy Tail Characters. Idea is from Black Butler. I do own this fanfic. Please do not copy.*

The night was a cold one, one where the first nip of winter was in the air. Leaves were gone from the trees leaving the cold wind to only blow bare branches.

Not far out of the town of Magnolia was a very well know Estate with a very well known family. Since time was ticking into the late hours of night, the house was silent.

A man sat in his study, working late into the night, his trustworthy butler bringing him more coffee when needed. His wife, a beautiful woman, actually to be considered the most beautiful woman in the town, was fast asleep in her bedroom. And, sneaking into the kitchen, was a spitting image of them both, their young teenage daughter.

The daughter snuck some of her favorite yogurt out of the fridge, then tiptoed back to her room, her long blonde hair flowing behind her. It was then that she noticed a strange smell, wait what was that?

It started in multiple places, the fire, and it spread to the rest of the manor quickly, devouring everything in its path. The manor began to crumble, the wood weak from the flames. Smoke had consumed the house, and filled the lungs of its occupants.

The young blonde sprinted through her large house. She headed for her parents bedroom first, the door was burned and had fallen. She could see her mother's body lying on the floor, engulfed in flames.

“Mom!” She screamed. She couldn't linger and mourn, she ran to the study next just a few doors down, to find that her father had met the same fate, and let out a sob.

She inhaled too much smoke and started coughing uncontrollably. Her eyes stung and watered to the point of blindness. She fell to her knees, her breaths started to shorten.

Why was this happening? What had even caused this? Why were her parents dead? Why wasn't she dead? No. She was dying. She had completely collapsed now, and all she could see were the bright colors of flames. She didn't want to die, she didn't want her parents to be dead. This wasn't fair.

“Life isn't really fair though, is it?” A clear voice rang out.

What was that voice? Had she imagined that? Maybe this was the end, maybe that was God’s voice calling her, telling her that her time was up.

“I assure you, I’m not God,” The voice said. “And how would you like to stay alive?”

The blonde lifted her head slightly and found that the voice has a host. A young man, by the looks of it. He had spiky pink hair and onyx eyes. His muscles were shown off by his clothing, or lack thereof. He wore an open sleeveless vest, strange since he was also wearing a scarf that resembled scales of a reptile. Stranger still, the man had a dark presence to him, and the flames around him didn't burn him, they actually seemed to be avoiding him.

“What?” She choked out.

The young man smiled down at her, revealing sharp canines. “I offer you life, for a price. I’ll save you, and let you live. I’ll even be bound to protect you. You want to know what happened tonight right? I’ll help you, but at one cost. At the end, I get your soul.”

The blonde stared up at him in disbelief. Was he for real? He wanted her to sell her soul to him, a demon by the looks of it. He had to be since he wanted her soul. But on the other hand, she’d live. And she could find out what happened here. Wouldn't her parents want that?

The young man knelt down next to the blonde, and extended his hand to her. “Do we have a deal?”

She extended a shaky hand and grasped his. “Deal,” she choked out.

An electric shock shot through her entire body, and she watched as a mark formed on her hand, it matched the one on the young man’s shoulder.

“I’m now forever yours, and you are now forever mine,” The young man said. Something about that phrase churned her stomach.

The pink haired man scooped the young woman up in his arms and jumped from the nearest window, saving her from the deadly flames. She was on the brink of death, and now she’d live.

Her life is now forever changed.

“It is an undeniable and may I say fundamental quality of man that when faced with extinction…every alternative is preferable.” ~RvB Season 6

[aryashi]

Hiya! I want you to know that a while back, you wrote a churboose fusion fic that I found when I first got obsessed with RvB and Churboose shipping, and I want you to know that it was a big inspiration! Never before had I read a fusion fic where fusing would be kinda awkward and cute and I love that they sang the song without music and it was all really improvised... just. Yeah. That fic was adorable. Hope you have a nice day.

!!!!!!!!!!!!

aaaaaaaaaaaa thank you!!! this message actually caught me on a pretty crummy day, so your timing is really good. Day improved! I’m glad you like the fic, it was pretty indulgent and I had a great time imaging what a very first fusion would feel like for people without that cultural context. Improvisation baby!!

[leafyfiddle13]

Worried About RvB

So I've been having a lot of thoughts about RvB since Singularity was announced the other day, and I just need to get them off my chest.

Red vs. Blue Season 17 (now known as Singularity) was announced as a three-sentence blurb in an RT update post. Not only that, this season was confirmed to have 12 episodes, by far the shortest season to date. In the same post was announced Camp Camp season 4, which they touted would have extra episodes this year. And that just makes me worried.

RvB, since it's inception, has had an average season length of around 19-21 episodes. Last year, it was announced that S16 would only have 15 episodes, and this year there will only be 12. And with RT making more and more shows like Camp Camp, Nomad of Nowhere, and especially RWBY and gen:LOCK, I'm worried that RvB is going to fade away soon.

A section of the RvB fandom was disappointed with S15. A much bigger portion of the fandom found S16 to be lackluster. And everything we've heard about S17 makes me worried that RT has given up on the show. One, it will only have 12 episodes. And two, the poster.

Visually speaking, it's a cool poster. But when you look closer, there are no new elements here. All the character shots are either recolored promo images for S16 or, in Wash's case, just a screenshot of the show.

RT has long said that they'll keep making RvB as long as people keep watching it, but I'm worried that we've reached the point where people have just stopped watching it. They've said that they won't cancel RvB without giving fans a warning far ahead of time, so I'm worried that whatever the story arc is after S17 wraps up, that will be our final arc. It kight be more than one Season. If we're lucky it'll be a trilogy and we get to Season 20. But I'm worried that we are reaching the end of RvB, and that makes me sad.