#roasting racism

[rhyliecaterflynevergetsbanned]

Elon Musk Is A Totally Dirty Traitor To Everybody On Twitter/X

I Did Heard Elong Musk Did A Filthy Nazi Swag, Which Is Very Bad. I Hate Him Since I Reacted To This From BBC Website

I'm With Patchy And I Would Sound Like Him, So I Gave Credit To eagc7 For This Template

[jesncin]

Thank goodness white martian and green martian live together in harmony in your comic. Not the stupid unbelievable thing about how green martian oppressed white martian treat them like second class citizen not perfect allegory of racism

Does green and white martian ever married to each other

Green and white martians can't become life partners. They're two different categories of martians (average martians vs cosmic martian). Since Mars itself creates white martians, there isn't an inherit need for white martians to have to procreate or have romantic relationships. A few white martians do make romantic connections with each other though.

and if they do you should!! Run immediately!!

[plumsaffron]

I think some to most of the miracubitches can’t tell the differences between morally gray characters (some of these characters make hard choices even if it hurts. But some fanfic writers can’t do it correctly either!), characters’ alternate POV (they weren’t there at the incident(s) so they’re more akin to being stuck in the middle or trying to avoid unnecessary petty conflict, they ain’t drones for the supposedly “beloved” protagonist) and just plain bashing…

And that’s not good for their fragile lil sanity…

Miracuhoes also can’t tell the difference between the canon and fanon versions of the main characters they supposedly love. 😔

They won’t admit it but some are lowkey rah-cist against white ppl due to painting Adrien as an abusive spoiled rich brat. Bruh, Adrien is an abuse victim!

Oh man, I personally think that the Lila/Cerise/Iris demonization isn’t as bad as most ML characters but the miracubozos just love to keep on being negative about her. 😬

Canon Lila: just a skilled actress who’s also a master manipulator? Still an antagonist though, probably never went as far as her Fanon selves?

Fanon Lila, we can thank the many fanfic writers’ dedication of creating more “depth” for her: some lies flop, leading to her downfall, instant prison time. Sociopathic and possibly psychopathic? (Inter)national criminal, she must’ve bullied other students (to hurt or off themselves…) from previous schools she went to all bc they called her out and didn’t fall for her lies. (Ngl, these days I feel more sympathy for these victimized fan characters than Marinette.) Instigating ass bitch, telling her mindless sheep followers to beat up her enemies. Let’s not forget these writers making Lila into a s3x offender bc some of the make victims rejected her. In retaliation, she makes them look like the offender, ruining them...

Hmm drones. It’s be a huge shame if I were to learn that these miracudung piles hate that sentimonster thing. From the observing these miracupests enough, long enough, it’s almost as if they advocate it entirely, simply because the character(s) they wanted to participate in doing for them, didn’t participate in their miracusuckoff cult for their protagonist or themselves. It’s almost as if miracudrones want characters to be sentis. Could it be that miracubitches want to be obedient miracusentis themselves?

I wonder if they want Gabriel, Tomoe, or Nathalie to be their parent(s)

But they must not see the difference of fanon vs canon of the their beloved main character(s). Fanon in their minds needs to be the superior version no matter the cost. If it’s not seen as how they think all canon should be for the characters, the glass of their sanity might break for these thirsty miracuhoes (with the bonus condition at times fulfilled of ignore the cases when they do or succeed what they opposed in canon).

Sigh. Seems these scuds don’t want to acknowledge and accept what a victim is or rather the ultimate victim of the show, Adrien, is. I don’t think they’re racist. I think they are possessed by evil. JUST KIDDING; some probably are racist or are the evil. Sigh… these miraccidents are too far gone. Gabuse slurpers they are I suppose too… well abuse slurpers. They must worship this image

But I’m not surprised cause that image is a actually a tragic reflection of how easily people would brush off what happened to Adrien (Most recently the London Special, where people are like yay hugs between Marinette Adrien or Nathalie. *UWU Sobbery intensifies* Or Ladybug and Cat Noir togetherness at the end of the special). Idk maybe they are casuals or just like seeing such crumbs or seeing what next, but it’s like they are glorifying or ignoring a victim being screwed with along with the characters in the special so called on his side (including the fugly Bunnyx trio and unfortunately Kwamis)

Wonderous how somethings shown in their faces consistently can be cancelled out and then scrambled up to make it out to be its Adrien’s fault somehow or Adrien is the problem. Cancellation of what was established and revealed and reinforced of existence. And so these maggots will make crap up for defamation against him and pass it around as if it's the truth. Sigh… Unfortunate how a victim won't or don’t be out to be causing problems, had different POVs, doing good and supporting others, caring for others and their well being, and unfortunately sacrifices himself and happiness, still gets shortended or screwed over (and currently continues; seemingly on the beloved protagonist’s side). And yet the reward some of these miraccidents gave him is to label him an abusive spoiled rich brat.

It could be. But yeah they Lila negativity be ridiculously spammed to the point I straight up usually refrain looking her up outside of here and even here I’m kind of like eh-ish.

Hmph I guess they want to leak fanon Lila in canon while doing the usual of not thinking things through because of their unstable obsession against her. Downfall addiction these miracusnorters have (figures since lies exposed crap is a worthless thing too many losers rodeo rode on). Psycho, socio, yep fanon or fandom braindeadium charge. It’s not that different from losers being the first to designate her to such. I wonder if it’s because they secretly know that what they label her might get redirected another character so labeling her is a twisted defense mechanism of theirs to prevent someone else from being targeted possibly.

Welp currently going on I know of is fancomic of Lila being a psychotic serial killer yandere or something currently, and getting folded by Chloe after Chloe saves Marinette. Chloe told her she’ll go to jail while Alya films what’s happening. Hmm international criminal. Yep hearing that again and remember of some bloggers posts of that crap makes be me groan.

Bullied others in the past. Hmm I remember an ask about that someone else posted to another blogger here. It’s funny cause they act like elementary children don’t exist. That Kim Sabrina Chloe or Marinette aren’t real (no offense). What are they trying to prove (oops I already know it’s that nonsense again because of their selective closed mindedness)? Oh boy to cause them to hurt or end themselves. Big irony of the fic triters to write that considering January 2022 Incident.

Ah instigating Lila. hmm that’s strange. I could have sworn people knew Marinette be instigating or a lot of viewers want to have her friends and Chloe and Sabrina (along with characters from other series) to rally up against Lila to wreck her like I remember at times seeing on here/deviantart. Perhaps they clowns should look at how demented they’ve become. They like assigning crap against her but the mirror scares them or other people around in their face. Strange form of Lila worshipping.

And unfortunately the worst of all their miracupredadvocation. And I thought crap where people make her a breed victim of Adrien/Cat Noir or Marinette/Ladybug was putrid enough (along with miracabomination prompter(s)) and disgusting human romanticizer(s). But I’m not surprised how far certain miracustains gone considering this as one of the reasons I avoid searching Lila Rossi on here or YouTube.

If you you’re wondering, this mistake of existence especially is saying she’s has 21 25 years or is an adult and is spreading that around (like a lot of other disasters on youtube commenters upvoting or usually endorsing it, redditors, at times here, social media etc).

I guess he did

And make to matters worse, very Spanish community alerted of the incident to also be the very community to honor the Lila fangirl by spitting on her grave (yes the rest of the miracatrocious community do but them though too is a big kind of wow), thus in a way, they and other watchers are joining the justifying everything that chased that girl to her end by viewers wanting the absolute worst to be true (and it doesn’t matter who’s affected in or out the show).

They must really wish Lila to not be ignored or to not be accepted and destroyed by any means despite the incident of the girl in real life not being accepted or left alone for accepting and wanting to see more of Lila.

Absence of thinking things through is strong for the miracufeces.

[dinosaurwithablog]

I love to watch old TV shows. That's a thing that us dinosaurs do from time to time, but I digress. This weekend, they are having a Dean Martin Celebrity Roast marathon. I have very happy memories of watching this show with my mom, while eating potato chips so I decided to watch the show. I just watched the roast of comedian and actor Redd Foxx. After everyone made jokes about him and insulted him, which everyone does and knows is just for fun, Mr. Foxx did something very different than anyone else that I've ever seen roasted on this show has done. He told a story about racism. I love that he went completely off topic because he knew how much people needed to hear what he had to say and think about what he said, that he took the time to tell a story and, as always, make us laugh by doing so. It moved me sooooooo much that I shot a video of it to share with you. I think that in this volitile world that we are living in, we should all think about Mr Foxx's story and try to make positive changes in our daily lives. Some people might not want to hear what Mr Foxx said so if you are one of those people, stop right here. I think it's a beautiful thing that he said, and I agree with the moral of the story wholeheartedly. Here it is. Please, ummute.

Redd Foxx makes a valid point. Me, personally, I don't judge people on anything, but who they are and what's in their heart. I love the diversity of people. It's exciting, and it gives us a chance to learn and experience so many wonderful things. I like to celebrate the differences. I hope that you do, too. If you don't, you should try it. You're missing out on some great stuff and, truly great people. I think we all need to make a point of trying to get along with all kinds of people and put aside any judgment of others until we get to know who they really are. Beauty is skin deep. ✨️ celebrate the differences. It will enlighten your world. It might even save the world. Thanks for the story, Redd. RIP 🙏🏼 😍💜🖤🤍

[linisiane]

I’m kind of annoyed at the big posts about Zepotha rn. You guys are gatekeepers and don’t even understand what you’re gatekeeping! Cohesion this and lack of plot that. “Skill issue” “Copycat!—” NO. We must go deeper.

Goncharov was a love letter to tumblr fandom culture. An analysis of the way we collectively talk queer themes into existence.

Tumblr blogs dedicated to queer ships. Intricate metas on the queer themes of a work. Screenshot redraws of romantic moments. Comics that are incredibly horny but still somehow capture the original themes. Prompt fills of what we imagine the story could’ve been had there been another (gayer) way.

So many of these types of posts on tumblr are considered reaches or “making things up” by the greater world. But they are analyses made meaningful through this shared sense of community, this shared experience of queerness in a society that doesn’t think of us or our themes as real. Goncharov being “made up” is a celebration of the way we come together to make the queer themes we want to see in the world, especially the ones the world doesn’t think exists. A way to say, “Of course we’re ‘mAkiNg tHiNgS uP,’ Goncharov is made up,” like it’s some sort of metaphor made literal.

Yes, the Google docs and the Martin Scorsese movie framework are a huge part of what made Goncharov work, but what spread excitement are the Goncharov posts just like the ones I listed above. Goncharov isn’t just what we imagine this fake movie to be, but also the fandom/queer culture we imagined surrounded it, and I’d argue that this culture is just as much of a framework for Goncharov as the Martin Scorsese thing was. Why else have non-canonical gay ships in the movie we made up?

TikTok’s problem is that it doesn’t have the original passion and love for queer analysis to gel it the way Goncharov did. Or really anything to gel it beyond cheap clout chasing. No depth, only virality.

It’s like a cute in joke being turned into loveless corporate marketing. Taking something from its original context to prey upon it, ruining what was good about it in the first place. It feels like when corporations tried to recreate Barbenheimer, except it’s someone trying to create a trend on TikTok to market their song, only for the trend to burn out quickly because everybody’s treating it like a joke instead of committing. By its structure (the reblog system) Tumblr is a place of collaboration and building upon what’s come before. TikTok, on the other hand, favors a personalized algorithm pushing viral content over content creators. It’s about reaching the top of a trend or a sound before it dies off in two weeks.

It just rubs me the wrong way how some people act like Zepotha’s crime is being a shitty copy of Goncharov. This is the Fanfiction website. We love amateurism and “originality” means nothing to us. We should be happy to celebrate the people on there making genuine attempts at TikTok edits of the characters or those TikTok green screen filter reviews of the movie or ‘dressing like Zepotha characters’ vids instead of denigrating Zepotha for being too derivative. There are genuine tiktoks out there that do a great job of committing to the bit and crystallizing what fandom formats on TikTok look like, which is exactly what the Goncharov screenshot redraws, horny comics, and queer metas were on Tumblr.

Like, there’s so much to rag against Zepotha—the inauthenticity, the clout-chasing, the way TikTok’s virality algorithm makes art worse, the lack of in-universe TikToks calling out the Zepotha fans for being racist (I’d kill for that TikTok skit!)—that roasting the amateur execution of excited teens is missing the forest for the trees.

[salty-dracon]

After the Obligations I kind of want to play Disco Elysium, but I know I'll be super right-wing-for-leftist-tumblr about it LOL

[wyrmfedgrave]

Trump invents ANOTHER crazy migrant story #shorts

The latest tRump lies, about immigrants, is that they're patrolling the streets - with machine guns!!

Are you sure that it wasn't your own Nazi folk?

They're proud to march around like boys with new toys...

End.

[doodlelover]

Dam Brooo u got roasted so bad. U should change your pinned to sumn like racists & bigots Do Interact. Getting roasted by two coloreds (now three) is so bad.

I have no idea what you're talking about. Also, I'm colored. If you're talking about the outdoor cat issue, I stand by my words that it's a worldwide human neglect issue. Cats spread disease (look up toxoplasmosis), fight to the death over territory, get run over by cars, and get poisoned all over the world. It is not racist to say cats do not belong free-roamig. And you're dumb af for thinking so.

[spider-xan]

Having tagged along with my parents on grocery shopping trips to Asian, usually Chinese, grocery stores during the 1990s, this idea that white people were bullying the poor Asians running these stores into selling products outside of their cultural range back then is historical fiction, like, there were no white people there, nevermind hordes of whites harassing the staff into stocking dragon fruit, and stores have always sold products from other Asian countries! Every Chinese grocery store I've ever been to had Japanese and Korean snacks and candy available long before white people ever thought of stepping foot in a hole in the wall ethnic grocery store, like, I assure you that they didn't stock Pocky in 1993 just bc white people demanded it lol

[bn-stands-for-book-nerd]

I think that's the problem with the notion of privilege. It was sociological tool, but it became a way to point fingers.

Here we have it : a person struggling with gender identities gets her suffering be compared to other's and reacts deffensively. Does it make the convesation progress ? I'm starting to feel like it doesn't.

I was on board for a long time, and I thought "Awesome, now I can understand the suffering of others through how it impacts myself, and grow as a person" and so on. But I feel like it turned in a christian-like "I/they suffered more than you do !" constest ...

It doesn't feel like it's doing good anymore, does it ? Could we grow past it and search for new ways to understand the struggles and build new ways to live together ?

Not gonna put this one on blast but buddy I think if you're assigning "privilege" to any trans people in any way, shape or form you're just having the wrong conversation

[that-hazbin]

I like the idea that Alastor is so Not with the times that he doesn't realize that racism isn't as prevalent as it used to be. (Still around but definitely not like before.)

He's been straightening his hair and putting on a Specific Accent for the past century trying so hard to be white-passing, not having realized that not many people would bat an eye anymore towards his curls. Hell, some people would swoon if he Talked Southern to them.

I want him to be punched in the face with the realization that he doesn't really NEED to do that anymore. Like, maybe a hotel guest calls him a cracker and he's genuinely taken aback that you can make fun of white people for being white and NOT fear mass persecution. (And also low-key offended/disgusted to be mistaken for a caucasian man, despite deliberately trying to pass as white. He knows it doesn't make sense, shut up.)

Alastor: Vaggie.

Vaggie: Uh, what?

Alastor: One of our guests accused me of being a "lily white" man. Like it's an insult. Have I missed something or is pretending to be a white man not a valid survival technique anymore?

Vaggie: ... Why are you pretending to be a white man?

Alastor:

Alastor: The fact that you're asking me that tells me SO much.

On the flip side, the realization that he can make fun of white people now becomes Alastor's FAVORITE modern development. His next radio broadcast easily becomes his most popular showing on account of him roasting Vox's privileged white ass.

He's become Hip With The Kids.

(He's quietly thrilled by the new following he receives. This would have NEVER happened during his era.)

[saintjosie]

its that time again! reblog and i’ll rate and roast your url 😊

#josieroasts for your filters

read more to participate ⬇️

couple of rules for y’all this time cause last time got out of hand:

you need clearly communicate consent to to do so

you must be 18 or older. if i catch u asking and you’re a minor, instant block no exceptions.

pick a level from 1-3, on a scale of gentle to hit me with your best shot.

rules for me:

if you want me to delete my response to you, i will do so with no questions asked

no transphobia, homophobia, racism, ableism, etc.

otherwise no rules 😈

glhf 😌

[elodieunderglass]

elodie! i am still excited to read your big fanfic works BUT i have also had SO much fun watching you develop your delightful OCs. i hope you are having fun with them too!!

Oh my goodness SO everyone who is mildly roasting me because they’re like “Killie the jockey OC is quite short and wretched and horrid, 🧐 much like Chilchuck. Is this a thing? Do you have a type?” is right and please don’t tell my husband that he’s horrid he’s actually quite sweet is putting their finger on the reason why I’ve sort of resurrected him and his worse brother Charlie in my subconscious.

Before writing Weasel Heart in Defiance I thought: I am about to embark on writing a novel that could 💯 be an original, standalone novel. And being a coward, I turned to my idiot OC Charlie, an imaginary friend since childhood, and asked:

Me: Charlie would you be able to be a protagonist of an original novel? because I’m scared?

Charlie: I have read the brief and am completely ineligible. I think you are only saying this out of fear, and because our initials are the same, and because I am short. Actually, the more I think about it, the more that is a microaggression (racism against short people), so no. No, and fuck you, and also -

Me: I was actually thinking of Killie -

Charlie: Killie would not take on any job that has so few horses in it.

Me: oh no -

Charlie: and you’re kind of committed to calling the story some variation of “weasel heart” and neither of us would have a weasel daemon. That’s kind of load-bearing, isn’t it.

Me: oh shit.

Charlie: like, and even if you sand the serial numbers off the rest of it, the whole point is -

Me: the weasel daemon, yeah.

Charlie: my daemon would be a potoo.

Me: it would NOT, you lying son of a bitch. It would be something backstabbing and horrible, with a core of utter ruthlessness. Like a poisonous spider.

(Charlie, hilariously, in a move that normal childhood imaginary friends/OCs do not normally pull off, briefly materialised as a hallucination while I was labouring in the drug-free, physically rather challenging delivery of a real human baby in order to laugh his ass off at me. He was presumably intended to materialise to give me courage. Instead he simply provided spite. I have longstanding Charlie beef.)

Charlie: Killie is a nice bloke in an awful way, if you like nice blokes who aren’t nice at all, but is too much of a mess to carry any sort of plot, and besides, his daemon is either something portable or a straight-up horse -

Me: probably a kestrel -

Charlie: Probably, as you say, a kestrel. God, there’s nothing between his ears at all. Elevator music. Lo-fi girl beats and the sound of the wind, overlaid over transparent montages of horses. Zero emotional life to Killie. He simply exists to ride alongside your parents’ car when driving, and to get shitmixed when he falls off, and to live up to mentally when you need to be stoic.

Me: he’s such a good ragdoll.

Charlie: he deserves it. It’s the punchable face.

Me and Charlie:… he needs a boyfriend.

[razorblade180]

Ruby:*drawing pentagram*

Yang:Ruby, sweetheart, what are you doing?

Ruby:Blake ate my cookies. *puts hand together* I’m calling in backup.

Yang:You chose demons before my help.

Ruby:You’d hold back.

Yang:Wow.

Weiss:It’s real bold of you to assume Blake just won’t take the chance to fuck the demon.

Blake:First, I am in the room! Second, what do you take me for!?

Weiss:It’s not the first time you’d fuck something horned and dangerous.

RBY: 😮

Emerald, upstairs: Hahahaha! HAAAAAAA! Oh shit! I’m texting him that!

Blake:Why do you have his number!?

Emerald:Because I can!

xxxxxx

Adam:*reads text*…God damnit.

Mercury:What?

Adam:I might have to admit Weiss is funny. *shows screen*

Mercury:….Hahahaha! That’s hilarious!

Adam:Shit…

xxxxxx

Emerald:He gave it a eight out of ten

Weiss:Ha! Look at that, ending racism through your roasting.

Blake:Fuck off!

Ruby:(Man that pentagram worked fast.)

[lyraeon]

I didn't put it in the original post because I was focused on things I did as an adult, after I already had agency and freedom to some extent.

But I know some of you are still 15, so even though it's been 20 years and 2002 was a very different time:

at 15 I was a sophomore high schooler at a very extracurricular-focused, homework heavy public high school, following spending K-3 homeschooled and 4-8 at a magnet school for Gifted Kids™. I couldn't get myself to do my homework or any projects, unless I could do them in class while the teacher was talking, and I never understood why. I'd gotten away with it before high school but 100%s on tests couldn't offset grades there, so I was spiraling into a worse and worse depression because I had no metric to measure myself on besides my grades and CLEARLY my family was right and I was just lazy and defiant and didn't want to do the homework and I was just making up the whole "I keep forgetting" and "I sit there and stare at it for hours but can't make myself do it" things. I was eternally grounded for my grades and "laziness", and my folks blamed my internet friends and the fact I stopped going to church for my bad attitude and depression (which I Totally Didn't Have Because You Have A Perfect Life With A Great Family And How Could You Be So Ungrateful And Make Us Look Bad By Pretending To Be Sad All The Time?)

Despite all this I still bought in to all my folks' racism and Bush loving bullshit (the defense was, "it wasn't that we hated ALL minorities! just the lazy ones! and it's their fault racism exists because they're making the whole group look bad!" and if that kind of argument feels at all defenseable to you please snap out of it) and earnestly believed being gay was just something perverts did and so all gay people should be in jail (and in my brainwashed mind, were, because all criminals were instantly caught and punished as far as I'd been taught - which we were largely taught to keep us scared of making even tiny mistakes). I defended having black and Muslim friends to my family as them being Some Of The Good Ones™ and only finally started to realize shit was fucked up when my grandfather banned me from visiting his house for dating a black guy (and did so in terms that even my folks knew were godawful slurs, but He's Old, Times Were Different, so I was just Supposed To Accept It.)

When you're young, you don't know what you don't know. You know what you have access to, are taught, and are shown. It would be nice if we all just instinctively knew what things are good and bad, or if we learned the truth on first exposure, but when you've heard the same rhetoric day in and day out your whole life you have no reason to question it until you're given one.

My friends had already tried telling me how racist I was and my response was that they didn't understand, I didn't hate all minorities, I just hated lazy and entitled people, and most minorities just happened to be lazy and entitled! and it was those people's fault for making the whole group look bad! not to mention systemic problems didn't exist and equality was definitely real and She Shouldn't Have Dressed Like That and all the other crap. It was all very, very well ingrained in there, and a huge part of it was that I had been made to feel like I was an awful person who barely deserved to exist because of how lazy and entitled I supposedly was (at 15! though a lot of this was ingrained much younger), so I really believed that one of the Truths of the universe was that laziness was a horrible sin and anyone who defended it was evil. Even after I finally got it through my skull that racism still existed and was still VERY prevalent, it was several more years before I snapped out of "well if the lazy people would just stop making them look bad".

(If it sounds like a lot of that's also ingrained self-hatred from the repeatedly diagnosed but ignored by my folks undiagnosed ADHD, you're absolutely right, and that's part of why I say a lot of hateful people are just resentful that others aren't holding themselves to the same impossible standards they hold themselves to [nevermind if they actually meet them or not] and that getting them to un-internalize those things will help snap them out of hating others.)

Same with "the gays". I went through so many stages - and the first stage was actually making up an all-girl alien race in 5th grade that didn't need icky boys and that reproduced by fusing eggs together, then getting chewed out by the girl scout troop leader for joking about homosexuality in front of her daughter, which is how I found out that being gay is even an actual thing not something I'd have to be an alien to be AND that being gay was supposedly a sin and illegal on the same day. It took no time at all for me to be all in on praying for those poor poor people who had been lead astray and given in to their perverted temptations, in hopes God would help them find their way and repent. I also decided I definitely had a crush on my best guy friend cuz clearly boys and girls can't just be friends either so it HAD to be a crush, right? (that one actually might have been, but then he moved away and man, the guy I obsessively pretended to like in 6th grade after that and I had a hilarious talk at 31 because he's now gay and an underwear model and he apparently never said anything negative about my awkward "crush" because he already knew he was gay and it made for a nice cover).

That carried on for years. At 16, my best friend came out to me in a crying fit, promising to me that she wasn't actually gay, she just really loved our one friend that much and surely that had to be ok as long as they never had sex because God doesn't make mistakes and wouldn't have made her be in love with a girl if that was actually Bad, right? My boyfriend at the time (who wouldn't officially come out as bi until his spouse came out as trans 10+ years later) told me he'd probably kiss a guy if he were cute enough, but he'd definitely never do it because we were gonna get married and have 3 kids and 2 dogs by the time we were 25, even though kissing a guy wouldn't really be cheating because well it's not like it'd be romantic cuz that'd be gay lmao. I made only three friends at college - one was a fairly open Two-Spirit person (my first real encounter with anyone trans-identifying, and at the time my brain did mental gymnastics to say that it was ok because she was Native American and their culture was different), one I was on tenuous terms with because she was a stoner, but also the only other gamer in the building, so I dealt with it, and she came out as bi within a couple months. The third was ace - a concept we didn't have a word for yet but somehow still understood and accepted as something Weird But Yeah It Makes Sense. By the end of the year I had started to suspect I liked girls but was fully convinced I was just playing up noticing how pretty they were in order to "fit in" better with my gay friends.

Part of why I stopped talking to my family for a while is because they banned me from being left alone with any minors in the family after I came out as bi at 19. I liked women, so in my family's mind that included even little kids and I was now a danger. I was so livid that I cut them off as much as I could.

Ironically I might have snapped out of a lot of the rest sooner if I hadn't cut them off, because being exposed to the juxtaposition of their bigoted views and emotional abuse vs the way the world actually was is what snapped me out of the first few things and made me start questioning the rest.

My point on all this is, again: people change and grow, and people don't know what they don't know. That doesn't mean you have to indulge every time someone asks for information (especially since sea lions exist) or go out of your way to explain things to people, but it does mean that things aren't as simple as "if you have ever said a homophobic thing you are awful forever", especially when those things are said while you're still under direct influence of your family and haven't had a chance to experience the world without their filter on it yet.

Basically, someone who's 80 and still uses the N-word has had plenty of time to be exposed to the world at large and know that's bigoted and has actively decided they don't care (or even are happy about it) and want to be seen that way. But someone who's still in high school and doing it may just not have exposure to anything they trusted and said different yet. That doesn't make them your responsibility nor mean you have to tolerate it, but it does mean dismissing them as lost causes or deliberately hateful may be missing the chance to snap them out of it and make the world a little less hateful, and if you are someone with the time, resources, and knowledge to educate them, it may be worth speaking up.

And I know I'm forever grateful to the people who took that time with me, and who saw that I wanted to be a good person but had been raised to think the bad things I was doing were good, and decided I was worth prying out of that. But I'm also forever indebted to them for putting up with my bullshit before then and for spending that effort, and I still wish I could undo the damage I did while I thought that way.

What it means above all is to constantly be curious about new things and look into them deeper. It's easy to fear or hate things you don't understand and to blindly believe the people you trust because they've raised and/or supported you. It's hard to ask extra questions, dig deeper, and to face the fact you were wrong about something - but it's worth it.

And if the people you spend time with make you afraid to admit you were wrong or to suggest they might be - not "I might have to explain things or get disagreed with" afraid but "I will get yelled at, ostracized, or worse for questioning anything or for admitting I made a mistake" afraid? You might need some different people to hang out with.

at 20 I thought I was faking my depression and was "bad at life" and lazy like my family said. I still earnestly believed I was entirely straight and everyone knew girls are just nicer to look at. I still had a ton of ingrained racism and other bigotry from my Bush-worshipping family. My main dream of being an astronaut had been smashed by my anxiety and health problems, so I was trying to study Japanese because like every other weeb I thought I'd fit in better over there (lol), but I'd already flunked out of one college and been forced to quit another to get a second job. I was overdrawn constantly and often buying gas station gift cards at the grocery store so I'd only take one overdraft fee. I was dating someone horribly controlling who eventually earned the title "evil ex", dialed up my eating disorder, and traumatized me out of writing for 2+ years. I had several roommates because we all considered having the funds to go to anime conventions more important than personal space (and because back then we already thought $600/month was expensive). I spent any other free time half asleep at a friend's house cuz there I could play games and watch Intent videos. Half my meals came free from work, the rest were hacked together from stuff that worked out to $1/serving or so. The power or internet got turned off at least twice a year from non-payment.

at 25 I thought I was too depressed to deserve burdening others with my presence or existence. that I was a burden and purposeful downer and nothing would ever get better. I was still dealing with a ton of internalized transphobia, racism, and other bigotry that I had been taught was Just The Truth and still occasionally fall into. I was massively straight edge against weed and anything else (threatened to call cops on close friends) while also being a half bottle of vodka a day alcoholic just to get my brain to shut up enough to let me write or sleep. I didn't know how to have fun without alcohol, if at all. I had lost my ability to draw when I severely injured my wrist while i had no insurance. I tried going back to school, first for architecture then teaching, and flunked/dropped out of both. I was losing jobs every 6~8 months from being chronically late and being sick constantly. I manged to lose one on my birthday and wound up having to make some other tough choices because of it. I had only just reached the point where being overdrawn was a rare thing and I wasn't buying single gallons of gas with tip money. food was still often just ramen but I no longer had days where I didn't know if I'd get to eat, though I was often dependent on my then-bf. I had multiple teeth rotting and couldn't afford any treatment besides getting them pulled, and often not until they'd become infected.

by 30 I was finally on antidepressants and in therapy. I was on the road to physical therapy for shoulder and wrist injuries that had happened years earlier. I was pretty happy in my relationship. I held down one job for almost 3 years straight after getting medicated, then turned around and flunked/dropped out of college for the 5th time (Physics this time) because I was too anxious to take public transit reliably and STILL couldn't do homework anywhere but in class, so most projects never got done. I'd stopped being able to write (and am still running from the possibility my meds Took That from me because it doesn't come back if I stop them). Food had become a different struggle - I no longer had time, physical health, or executive function to cook reliably so I was spending too much on take out and causing wild fluctuations in my weight. I was hiding my eating disorder from my partner and my friends. I had begrudgingly un-estranged myself from my family to support younger cousins as they came out as queer. I had developed a healthier relationship with alcohol. I had accepted that, outside of addiction, drugs are a bodily autonomy thing and stopped being an ass to people about them. I had finally learned some damn etiquette around things like not accidentally outing people. I started streaming and making videos - stuff I had dreamed of since first watching Dead Fantasy and Red vs Blue and Weeblstuff in high school but had thought impossible after I lost the ability to draw.

I'm currently 35. This year I am living on my own for the first time (aside from 5 failed months at 18). I got divorced - a complicated, regretful process that was ultimately for the best but I could and should have handled better (and sooner). I've been in physical therapy long enough that I'm able to use chopsticks properly again and am thinking of trying to relearn drawing. It's also meant I can do the dishes and wash my hair on my own again, most days, so I'm relearning how to cook consistently. I'm reading (listening to) books again. I'm on year 8 of antidepressants and currently working with my doctor to fine tune what I'm on (and finally have a system to take them consistently). I've been diagnosed with ADHD and figured out I might also be autistic, and a lot of things in my life make way more sense when viewed through that context. I have appointments to get evaluated for ADHD meds, autism, shoulder surgery/other "PT isn't enough" treatments, teeth implants, and new glasses. my clothes have been put away 3 of the last 5 times I did laundry and I've learned that if I only own one dishwasher worth of dishes, the sink can't pile up. I've fully embraced that I'm polyamorous, pansexual, and demiromantic, and that I can be cis while also being "gender agnostic" - none of it really matters or processes to me, but I get that it does to others so I respect it. I'm seeing someone who makes me feel like I can do anything, is inspiringly ambitious themself, and is equally polyam, meaning I might also be asking out a cute girl soon and don't know where board game nights with the nice throuple I met might go. I'm having to do odd jobs and accept help from my dad to make ends meet, but I'm arguably a full time content creator now - something I literally didn't even let myself dream about when I was younger because it felt impossible, but which is fully worth the complications and budget crunching because it's so accommodating to my disabilities and uses so many of my talents. I'm still depressed, but I have hope that ADHD treatment will help cut through the remainder. Most days I just have hope, period. And more days than not, I'm genuinely happy for at least a while.

You'll find yourself.

It might take a while. There will be detours, mistakes, pain, tough choices, and a lot of hard work. But there will also be unexpected joys and more possibilities than you ever imagined.

Someday, you'll find yourself.

And when you do, it will be worth the wait, I promise.

[dreaminginthedeepsouth]

President George W. Bush's chief speechwriter, Michael Gerson, has a message for people who are excusing President Trump's racism:

"I had fully intended to ignore President Trump’s latest round of racially charged taunts against an African American elected official, and an African American activist, and an African American journalist and a whole city with a lot of African Americans in it. I had every intention of walking past Trump’s latest outrages and writing about the self-destructive squabbling of the Democratic presidential field, which has chosen to shame former vice president Joe Biden for the sin of being an electable, moderate liberal.

But I made the mistake of pulling James Cone’s 'The Cross and the Lynching Tree' off my shelf — a book designed to shatter convenient complacency. Cone recounts the case of a white mob in Valdosta, Ga., in 1918 that lynched an innocent man named Haynes Turner. Turner’s enraged wife, Mary, promised justice for the killers. The sheriff responded by arresting her and then turning her over to the mob, which included women and children. According to one source, Mary was 'stripped, hung upside down by the ankles, soaked with gasoline, and roasted to death. In the midst of this torment, a white man opened her swollen belly with a hunting knife and her infant fell to the ground and was stomped to death.'

God help us. It is hard to write the words. This evil — the evil of white supremacy, resulting in dehumanization, inhumanity and murder — is the worst stain, the greatest crime, of U.S. history. It is the thing that nearly broke the nation. It is the thing that proved generations of Christians to be vicious hypocrites. It is the thing that turned normal people into moral monsters, capable of burning a grieving widow to death and killing her child.

When the president of the United States plays with that fire or takes that beast out for a walk, it is not just another political event, not just a normal day in campaign 2020. It is a cause for shame. It is the violation of martyrs’ graves. It is obscene graffiti on the Lincoln Memorial. It is, in the eyes of history, the betrayal — the re-betrayal — of Haynes and Mary Turner and their child. And all of this is being done by an ignorant and arrogant narcissist reviving racist tropes for political gain, indifferent to the wreckage he is leaving, the wounds he is ripping open.

Like, I suspect, many others, I am finding it hard to look at resurgent racism as just one in a series of presidential offenses or another in a series of Republican errors. Racism is not just another wrong. The Antietam battlefield is not just another plot of ground. The Edmund Pettus Bridge is not just another bridge. The balcony outside Room 306 at the Lorraine Motel is not just another balcony. As U.S. history hallows some causes, it magnifies some crimes.

What does all this mean politically? It means that Trump’s divisiveness is getting worse, not better. He makes racist comments, appeals to racist sentiments and inflames racist passions. The rationalization that he is not, deep down in his heart, really a racist is meaningless. Trump’s continued offenses mean that a large portion of his political base is energized by racist tropes and the language of white grievance. And it means — whatever their intent — that those who play down, or excuse, or try to walk past these offenses are enablers.

Some political choices are not just stupid or crude. They represent the return of our country’s cruelest, most dangerous passion. Such racism indicts Trump. Treating racism as a typical or minor matter indicts us."

— Michael Gerson

(Thanks David Dark)