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sombrasaiyan · 3 years ago

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Attack on Saiyan | cellhan

smut, rape/non-con, graphic violence, blowjob, deflowering, yaoi, gay sex, degradation, torture

summary: Gohan now lives peacefully years on from the battle he had against Cell. Now known as the hero of the world, he knows he will be threatened by villains like his father once was. What Gohan didn’t expect was a familiar foe to come crawling up from behind with the intention of revenge. Revenge is a dish best served cold.

shipping: cell x gohan

Years had passed since the cherished and kind hearted Goku had sacrificed his life in order to protect the planet. From then on, Gohan went on to properly attend school and train his baby brother Goten. Gohan knew that the world needed someone to protect it from the evils that lurked beyond their world and into space, and he was willing to be the hero it needed.

It's a warm summer morning as Gohan stretches, sighing once he was able to get the blood flowing to the rest of his body. The birds were already awake and chirping while the laughter coming from his brother could be heard. "Boy! I sure am excited about this camping trip! It's gonna be so much fun!" Goten declares happily, stuffing his backpack with spare clothes and food.

Their mother Chi-Chi approaches from behind, carrying a pack of bento boxes for her sons. "I packed some food for you guys, please enjoy your camping trip!" Chi-Chi says sweetly.

"We will, thanks for the food, mom." Gohan says, looking down at Goten who smiles up at him. They then take flight and head on toward the forest.

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As Goten splashes around in the water, Gohan began to set up the tent for them. He was glad that they were going to spend a week out here in the wilderness. It was a bittersweet memory washed up in his brain about the past when his father would take him to go camping. "Gohan! What are we going to eat for dinner?" Goten asks, once he pulls himself away from the water.

"One of mom's bento boxes, we can eat those tonight and in the morning we can make a fish stew." Gohan responds, smiling as his little brother trots his way over. The two then proceed to pull off the lids to their first round of packed dinner.

Finally, it was time for them to go to bed with their tummies full and excitement flooding them. Goten tended to show it more than Gohan but deep down, Gohan was also excited.

After Goten asked a million questions, he was out like a light. Gohan on the other hand, stared at the stars through the fabric of the tent. Late night thoughts kept him up, but he knew eventually he would fall asleep too.

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Goten was the first to be awake, collecting shiny rocks that he would beg Gohan to allow him to keep. The hybrid filled the bucket up with multicolored stones with endless patterns sprawled on them. The small saiyan then proceeded to head over into the lush forest that wasn't far from their campground. He turns around to look at the tent, still making out that Gohan was sleeping in it. He wouldn't mind if Goten went off on his own for a bit, right?

With his bucket in one hand, Goten ventures through the forest, admiring the cute little animals that smile at him. The tall tall trees tower over him as birds chirp sweetly throughout the forest. If it wasn't for this man made trail, Goten figured he would've lost himself at this point since all the trees looked the same.

Before the saiyan could move any further, an eccentric yet somewhat deep voice alludes from within the trees. "I didn't think Goku would have another son. That poor wife of his must be exhausted from raising two saiyans, huh?" The voice says as a matter of factly. Goten's eyes widen, with bent knees as he looks around his surroundings.

The mysterious man chuckles, shaking his head as he lowers himself down to stand behind the small saiyan. "In fact, just the spitting image of your father."

"M-My dad? You know my dad?" Goten stuttered, not hearing that anyone else knew of his dad minus his family and Trunks' family.

The tall perfect being smiled to himself, nearly chuckling at the innocence of this hybrid saiyan. However, the innocence of this saiyan was one he didn't want. He wanted Gohan's innocence all to himself. "Why yes, I knew your father. In fact, I'm the one who caused your father's death. What an idiot he was."

Goten pouted, although he didn't know much of his father personally, he wasn't going to take some creepy big bug man talking about him like that. "Stop calling my dad names! I'm pretty strong, so you don't wanna mess with me!" In a flash, Goten turned super saiyan as he pointed his finger at the monster. "I'm gonna beat you up for my dad."

The monster chuckles as he shook his head. "I'm charmed, young one. But you're not the one I seek vengeance on. It's your brother Gohan."

Goten's jaw is agape as he couldn't believe this dark green speckled creature also knew Gohan! Goten felt ice prickle at his skin as he was starting to fear such a creature that knew so much about his family. What if he knew everything!

"G-Gohan?!"

In a flash, the green man was in front of Goten, smirking down at him. "On second thought though, it would be a real shame if Gohan also lost his only brother. A feisty little boy you are! You radiate so much delicious power inside of you . . ."

Goten cringes in disgust at the tone of the man's voice portraying such excitement. Before he could allow himself to be distracted with his own disgust, Goten began to punch and kick at the villain. He was quick to dodge everything until he found an opening to Goten's punch and swung a mean fist up at his stomach, causing Goten to rasp out. As the small hybrid toppled over in pain, the creature then kicked him to a cliff, proceeding to chase after him with continuous blasts.

Through the debris of the crumbling cliff, Goten sped his way out, wiping the blood off that trailed down his lip. As the green bug charged at Goten, he threw his arms up in defense and continued their match of punches and kicks. Deep down in his stomach, Goten's fear was still lurching deep within.

"I've held back long enough, your brother must've sense our ki already. So, let's give him a sight he won't forget." He says with a grand smile, slamming Goten's poor small body into the ground repeatedly before recoiling his tail from his resting position. "What a feast! I'm sure with your power I'll overpower your brother!"

"What're you talking about—" before Goten could cast a look up at the monster, he was captivated in a darkness. Swollen with an excruciating tightness that squeezed him. He was uncomfortable and scared and could feel himself go up into wherever he was. "G-Gohan!!!" He cries out through sobs, wanting this nightmare to end.

As if on cue, a grand yellow ki ray slices across the creature's tail, causing the tail to fall off with Goten inside. Before the bug could comprehend what was happening, a huge gust of wind hits his eyesight. Goten was scooped up in an embrace and taken off to another part of the forest.

"G-Gohan?" Goten wipes the tears off his face as he clutches onto the fabric of Gohan's dark violet gi.

"Goten! I'm sorry I didn't come sooner," Gohan then stares at the dust bowl that formed around the one person he'd never imagine he'd see ever again. "Cell is back, and is incredibly dangerous if allowed to consume power . . . I fought him years ago and defeated him, most likely he's here for a rematch." Gohan declares.

Goten held his grip on Gohan and shook his head. "Please, Gohan don't fight him! He's so scary! He tried to eat me with his tail!" He hiccups through tears. "I don't wanna lose you!"

Gohan eases a smile. "Don't worry Goten, you won't. I'll be here for you. But right now, what I want you to do is run back to Capsule Corps. and let everyone know what's going on. I need all the answers I can get."

Goten nods, giving Gohan one last hug before flying off.

Gohan sighed. He didn't want Goten to stick around and potentially get even more traumatized from Cell. He made sure Goten made it out safely as he then turned around and on-looked at the sight of Cell standing there with folding arms. Gritting his teeth, he thought of endless possibilities of how Cell could be back, but none of them made sense.

Taking a deep breath, Gohan soars down below toward the perfect being and stood a few feet away from him with narrowed eyes. "So you're back from the dead, really can't imagine why."

Cell chuckles, continuing to stare daggers straight at the once little boy he fought so long ago. "I was pondering the same thing, one moment I was in hell for eternal damnation and the next I woke up on this planet again. It seems fate has brought us back together again, Gohan."

Ignoring his theory, Gohan gets in a fighting stance, continuing to give Cell that menacing glare. "That's real messed up of you to try and absorb my brother! You have nothing against him, the only one you should really be trying to get at is me!" He declares angrily.

Slowly now, Cell takes a couple steps forward. "I was thinking the same thing, but it would've been nice to see you in a bigger fit of rage than what you're showing me now. And you're right, I seek everything from you. Absolutely everything."

Gohan grins. "I'd like to see you try!"

In a flash, the two throw themselves in a much anticipated match, throwing punches and kicks that the two continued to dodge endlessly. Gohan could sense that the bug was holding back, and before he could throw another punch, Cell sped backward and threw a big ray of ki blasts towards Gohan to distract him. Gohan of course, having learned at this point managed to dodge most. Before he could even think, Cell was upfront and close, pulling Gohan into a crushing hold.

One that brought back memories for the two of them.

Cell then proceeds to tighten his hold, causing Gohan to scream out in pain, panting soon afterward.

"Here's the deal, Gohan. Either you let things go my way and be a good boy or you make this harder than it needs to be and I will force you to submit. Your choice!" Cell declares, his pink pearls staring up at Gohan's pain dazed face, his screaming music to his ears.

There was no way Gohan would back down that easily, and as his limbs were sinking down with no movement he couldn't really pick now.

"Well? What will it be?" Cell continues, loosening his grip as Gohan pants, raising both hands up to his forehead, preparing to launch a Masenko. Cell clicks his tongue in annoyance. Of course Gohan was going to be a brat and rebel. Cell then spun the hybrid's body until his back was against his chest and before Cell allowed Gohan to comprehend what was going on, he slammed Gohan down into the ground.

Gohan's face was greeted with the rough and hard surface as Cell grips the back of his black strands of hair and slams his face down into the surface. "You refuse to submit, and now you give me no choice! I've been waiting for this moment for a while now! All my thoughts rage of only you Gohan! From the moment you sent me straight to hell!"

Gohan says nothing, but spits the dirt out of his mouth as his arms and legs begin to scramble in panic to get out of his situation. Cell seemed prepared for this too as he lowers himself down on Gohan's back, wrapping his newly regenerated tail around Gohan's waist and proceeds to lick the back of Gohan's neck.

Feeling the cold wet tongue of the perfect being sliding up and down his neck made him shiver. His obsidian orbs shake within the pool of his white eyes. He was trembling as he felt Cell's fingers trail across his left shoulder, ripping a fat piece of the fabric off to expose the shoulder.

"W-What are you doing, Cell! This isn't a re-rematch!" Gohan stutters, his fingers digging into the dirt as panic flooded his very being even more to the point that it hurt.

"No, it's not!" Cell says dramatically, "It's revenge my dear saiyan, and I won't stop until I'm satisfied . . . After all I am your demon." Cell breathes down his neck, then moving his face towards his shoulder and takes a bite down, sinking his teeth in until he could feel the warm gush of blood. With his free arm, Gohan covers his mouth, nearly screaming into it as he could feel Cell's sharp teeth tear into his flesh, practically sucking his blood like a thirsty vampire.

Gohan's heart was pounding within his ribcage as he forced himself to wait until Cell was done with the deed. Once Cell believed he got a good taste of Gohan, he removed his face from being planted on his shoulder. His lips and cheeks were painted with the crimson red flow as his tongue licks at what remained on his face. Sweet sweet blood that was like nectar to the bug. His pink eyes then proceed to stare down at the shoulder, admiring the work of his teeth marks and blood trickling down at every corner.

"This world could've been all mine, I could've been known as the strongest in the universe! I even liked you enough to be the only other person alive! But now you've chosen this route, naughty saiyan." Cell declares darkly as he then spun Gohan around until he laid on his back.

Gohan glares up at Cell, shaking his head. "You know that would've never happened!" He fought back, attempting to work his hand up, and before he could move either hand, both were greeted with sharp ki blades piercing down at the wrists. His screams were louder than before, turning into gasps for air before subduing to whimpers.

"Like I said, Gohan! I will make things rough if you don't submit, and right now it seems you want pain over anything else I could possibly give you! The sooner you submit, the quicker this will end!" Cell then stares at the strong neck of Gohan and a wicked idea crossed his mind so quick. Before he could get an answer out of the now restricted hybrid, he licks up and down at his neck, loving the texture of his surprisingly soft skin.

Confusion still remained in his body as a deep flood of radish red takes his cheeks. He couldn't believe that Cell was even doing all of this, and that it was earning this kind of reaction from his body. Cell's tongue was ravishing his neck, then traveling down his chest as Cell finds sweet spots to suck on. With Gohan's wrists still painfully pinned down, he wasn't able to cover his mouth, but biting down his lip he was able to sustain a moan or a groan. He didn't understand what was pushing the parasite to do this, why he was doing all of this!

"Ahh," Cell exhales, pulling away to admire the areas of Gohan's skin that would soon be covered with his markings. "Your virgin little mind probably doesn't understand what's going on here, so I'll enlighten you. I plan on taking your virginity to remind you who was your first time, and I won't be doing it out of love, no. I'm going to be enjoying myself at the expense of your pain."

Gohan's eyes widen as he couldn't believe the words that escape Cell's mouth. He planned to fuck him?! All because Gohan defeated him many years ago, and now that he was older, Cell wanted to humiliate and degrade him until he became the insecure little boy from long ago—was that it?! "W-Why, Cell! You don't even like me! Why don't you just save yourself some time and kill me!" Gohan declares, and although he had no prior knowledge of gay sex, judging by the way Cell talked, it wasn't going to be pretty.

Cell roars out in laughter. "Killing you would be far too easy! And what good is the dead body of a saiyan if it isn't alive to be tortured with? Absolutely nothing you say or do will stop what's coming."

Cell watches as Gohan's mouth moves to open, probably another poor attempt to beg Cell to stop so before he could speak, Cell quickly latches his lips down on Gohan's kissing his lips over and over again. The hybrid probably hasn't even experienced his first kiss either so that made Cell smile into the kiss. Gohan squeezes his eyes shut, disgusted with the feeling that Cell was kissing his lips, even licking at the surface of them and before he realized it, Cell's tongue had swarmed inside of his mouth.

"None of this is real, Gohan! You'll wake up back in your room and mom will yell at you for sleeping in so late!" Gohan inwardly thought, but it was too real and he was just living in denial.

Cell's tongue wraps aroundg Gohan's tongue and begins to suck away at the saliva he had to offer. While Gohan was distracted with that, Cell's fingers edge down towards the red belt that securely held his outfit into place. A couple of fierce tugs and it was loose. Gohan's cries muffle through the ongoing make out session as Cell pulls off the belt and throws it to the side. Digging his nails into the waistband of the pants, Cell pulls them down, then breaking the kiss so he could properly work with them.

He found the second layer—his boxers, pulling those down too to reveal Gohan's penis to him, nearly erect with all that Cell was doing. Poor Gohan probably felt ashamed with it poking up like this. "C-Cell! W-Wait, stop! Leave me alone down there!"

With the wicked grin Cell gave Gohan and the darkness that drowned in his pearls of eyes, Gohan knew he wouldn't listen. If he didn't listen the first time, what's the point of him listening now?

Cell stares at the boner a lot longer than Gohan thought he would've, this made Gohan blush in embarrassment with being so exposed. Cell allows his curious wandering hand to coil around it, greeted with its warmth and firmness.

"C-Cell . . ." Gohan whine's the l's dragged on a bit longer than it should.

"You're pretty big, aren't you Gohan? Oh, how a girl would be lucky to have you." Cell comments, as he rubs the tip with his thumb. "Too bad, though." The perfect being begins to stroke Gohan's member up and down in his hand, earning soft groans from the hybrid that was beneath him. Gohan couldn't stop watching Cell touching him like that, and surprisingly it felt good. This whole situation was still very sick to Gohan though. "Do you like it, Gohan? Do you like how my hand feels rubbing your penis like this?" Cell chuckles, quickening the pace as Gohan's groans turn into loud moans. With arched eyebrows and a redder blush than before, Gohan arches his head back in the pleasure that was bursting throughout him.

Cell grins as he watches Gohan fall apart, rubbing him a little while longer before stopping. The hybrid was panting, just as the bug expected. Cell then gets on all fours and angles himself so that his face was near Gohan's boner, his tail uncoiling from being wrapped around Gohan's waist for a good majority of the hybrid's time being on his back.

"C-Cell, what are you doing?" Gohan whines, as Cell smirks at him, saying nothing. Actions spoke louder than words, as Cell stroke him a couple more times before opening his mouth and taking inches of the hybrid's boner in his mouth. Gohan gasps out, forcing himself to look down at the parasite's mouth down on inches of his cock. "Gah! C-Cell!" He cries out, moaning as Cell began to bob his head back and forth to keep the sucking pattern going strong. His blush darkens as beads of sweat pool up on his skin. He couldn't believe that his villain was doing this to him!

Cell felt Gohan's dick in the back of his throat, and luckily he had a big throat to let it hit back. His tongue licks all around the surface of Gohan's dick and began to massage at his chest. "Come now, Gohan! You should be cumming right now!" Cell inwardly thought as he squeezes the rest of him, preparing for the hybrid's load. Gohan must be very overwhelmed with it, and true to what Cell thought, Gohan's cum began to spill onto his tongue. Gohan yelped out loudly, shivering with his first blowjob's orgasm.

Pants fill the air as Cell pulls away, wiping the fluids off his mouth. Before either him or Gohan could say another word, Cell flips Gohan around and pushes the hybrid back down onto his stomach. Gentler this time, Cell then proceeded to pull Gohan's pants down to his shoes. He stares at the hybrid's ass as he licks his lips. "You're a virgin, so . . . I'll make this easy for you . . ." Cell felt his own penis slide out from being kept inside of his black shield. His own dick was already wet with his sexual advances on Gohan. He was practically dripping with the lust for the hybrid.

Gohan couldn't see now, but the fresh air wasn't exactly pleasant for his rear. Gohan gritted his teeth, he knew sex this much to know that Cell was going to put his cock in his ass—he just wasn't prepared for the pain that it would bring. Squeezing his eyes shut, he didn't even want to think. He just wanted it all to end, as his eyes started to ache with an unbearable weight.

Cell slides his boner in between Gohan's butt cheeks, savoring the feel as his fluids begin to coat Gohan, the hybrid shivering with the coldness of it. Cell growls lowly as he slides it back and forth, grinding away as he smirks down at Gohan, proceeding to wrap his tail around his waist again and dig his hand into the waves of his hair. "My, my! You feel splendid Gohan! Perhaps, I'll drag out our little session here that will commence very soon!" Cell declares, massaging himself with the insides of Gohan.

"Just start it already!" Gohan cried out, the tears pricking the edges of his eyes as they dared to escape. "Please!"

"Ah, ah, ah!" Cell shook his head, massaging Gohan's exposed shoulder, causing Gohan to wince. It was still searing with pain and he didn't like it. "I want my penis to fit inside of you, Gohan!" Cell quickens the grinding as Gohan couldn't help but moan. He hated to admit it, but he was going crazy due to all this torment. It felt good, really good. But this was all wrong! This was the monster that murdered his father! This was the monster that tortured thousands, possibly millions of lives! And now here he was, in some fucked up logical way doing this to Gohan.

Cell then proceeds to pull himself out and stares at the mess he created and grins with pride. It was now time to start this, and there was no way he was going to stop until he was completely satisfied. He aims the tip of his member at Gohan's ass, rubbing against the entrance as Gohan flinches just like the bug expected him to.

Gohan snapped out of his trance as his head jerked upward, whimpering through clenched teeth. He despised the way Cell's tip felt poking at him! He could practically throw up at any moment, and it didn't better justify the situation they were in because he was pinned. Not a single warning, no words escaped from Cell's lips, but one low grunt. Cell forcefully shoved his penis all the way inside, into Gohan, causing the hybrid to scream out in pain, a continuous pain of scream mixed with gasps for air. Before Gohan knew it, the once preserved tears were rushing down his face as he couldn't take the pain of him being deep inside. His cries were childish, soft, as his sobs raged on.

Cell grins, enjoying the tears of his favorite enemy. He kept his boner deep inside Gohan, not moving out or starting a thrusting pattern. The gush of warmth that flowed around him however was no doubt Gohan's blood. "Awww, what's the matter Gohan? Can't take it? I thought saiyans were the strongest race ever! Surely you can handle something like this!" The android declares, lowering his lips down to the shoulder he bit and proceeds to sink his teeth deep down again. Gohan screams out in pain as Cell begins to move his his back and forth, having a bit of difficulty sliding himself.

None of Gohan's words wanted to come out, they were downgraded to just whining and crying. Gohan's face was now wet with his tears as he tried his hardest to find his happy place. Fighting alongside Piccolo? Playing outside with Goten? Being saved by his father? Enjoying his mother's cooking? No matter where he ran, Cell was always there in his thoughts. Gohan always had to be reminded that Cell was his first everything.

"Ahhh," Cell exhales. "You feel so good, Gohan. I think it's time to quicken the pace." He says once moved on from scarring Gohan's shoulder any more. The android then moved back to get on his knees as he bent Gohan to get on his knees as well. Removing his tail, he then holds the hybrid's hips and starts a moderate thrusting session, forcefully pushing his penis in and out. Gohan sniffles as his fingernails scratch at the dirt, unable to say anything in response but cry.

The android stares at Gohan's back, bare and naked from any of his touches. What a shame, and besides . . . It was time for Cell to get a good look at Gohan. Cell flips them over so that Gohan was resting down on Cell's body, his head on the parasite's chest. "C-Cell?" Gohan manages to say through his sobs, his arms finally free from being restricted. He couldn't do much with them because they were numb and heavy with the time they didn't move and they still hurt from being stabbed.

"What? It looks like you need a hug." Cell talks to Gohan in a baby voice as he adjusts his legs so that he could thrust easier into Gohan. The hybrid's sobs vibrates on Cell's chest as Cell smirks, enjoying every tear and noise that Gohan made. His black nails trail up on Gohan's back as he digs them in, piercing at his skin. Running them down his back, four trails of blood followed as Gohan's nails dug into Cell's arms, screaming into his chest. Possible words were muffled. Once Cell's fingers reached Gohan's waist, he firmly wraps his arms around Gohan and continued to pound him. This in turn made Gohan hold onto Cell, screaming into the chest of his enemy.

Cell slammed the hybrid down the ground as Cell was now able to see his face and his dick erected because of their sex. He stares down at Gohan's tears and cuts that formed through him being handled so roughly. The hickies were now becoming noticable alongside the bruises Cell left on areas of Gohan he firmly held. Almost everywhere, there was a mark from Cell. A mark that made Gohan Cell's property. His and only his, and this in turn turned Cell on even more as he sped up with the thrusting, lowering himself down so that Gohan could hold onto him. Now Gohan's moans and Cell's groans fill the nature they fucked in, Cell was riding out his high as he felt the burst of pleasure dare to explode.

His groans were becoming messier, and he realized his first climax was very close. He pushed his penis all the way in, gasping out lowly as he came inside Gohan's ass. The hybrid screamed, squeezing Cell tightly into an unexpected embrace as he too could feel his own climax on his stomach. For a while, Cell laid there on top of Gohan, allowing the two to catch their breaths. The sound of the bodily fluids dripping out of Gohan's ass was audible as Cell gifts Gohan a kiss, deep and dirty with tongues involved.

Cell rolls off of Gohan and lays there beside the hybrid, staring at his purple dick lathered with his cum and the blood of Gohan. He then turns to look over at Gohan who was turned the other way, huddled up in a little ball. Humiliation was eating him alive, and he couldn't believe he allowed his villain to viciously fuck him. The blood on his back was splotched together in artful patters as Cell could make out his scratch marks. His ass was splattered with the blood and cum as Gohan dared not look back at Cell.

After a few moments pass by, Cell sat up as Gohan took this opportunity to try and crawl away. Cell immediately picked up Gohan into his arms, and Gohan couldn't fight him. He didn't know if it was the fear of being fucked again, or simply because he knew he couldn't fight him. Cell was ridiculously powerful right now.

"And just where do you think you're going? I was planning on originally letting you go . . . But you feel so good Gohan. I intend on keeping you as mine." Cell declares as he watches the hybrid's eyes widen in absolute horror. Gohan knew that his friends would save them, they would! As if Cell could read his mind, he maliciously grins down at Gohan. "The good few of your friends won't be saving you at all." Cell raises up on his feet as he held Gohan. "Don't worry, Gohan. I'll make sure every day is filled with pleasures and being beside me. I love you Gohan." Those last four words made Gohan begin to scramble in Cell's arms, but Cell kept his hold. "This world will be ours!"

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Goten, Trunks, Vegeta and Chi-Chi rushed on to the camp grounds, attempting to search endlessly and hopelessly for any source of Gohan. When Goten led them to a familiar area, all they found was dried up blood and Chi-Chi couldn't stop her tears. Vegeta held her in an embrace as he just allowed Trunks and Goten to try and look for Gohan.

After Chi-Chi had finished her crying, they kept looking. No one could sense the ki of Gohan and Cell, and mysteriously, the good majority of the Z fighters were missing as well.

Search parties looked for the missing Gohan, but no one could ever find him, or Cell.

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ghostymallows · 3 years ago

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revenge is a dish best served gay or something like that

Summary: Jackie can be very mean when getting revenge and Ran knows this better than anyone.

A/N: might change the title later who knows. i’m not Super confident in this one so i’m sorry if it’s not as good as my drabbles.

Ran has been in his fair share of frightening situations, due to his whole assassin thing in the past, and has undergone thorough training to prepare himself for them. To keep a level head, to not let his fear show.

This one has to be the most nerve-wracking of them all, he’s sure.

He’d never been very good at keeping himself still in these kinds of situations, so he can’t help but shift nervously under Jackie’s stare. His hands remain unmoving on his sides, except for his thumbs slightly rubbing up and down just to feel Ran tense up.

“What?” Jackie grins, and Ran finds just enough confidence in himself to glare at him, even when his face starts to burn. “I’m hardly doing anything.”

“But yohou’re-“ A giggle slips out through his words, and Ran cuts himself off to compose himself for a moment. “You’re going to.”

Jackie giggles, like a little bitch. “Yeah, i am.” His tone is sugary sweet despite the way he lifts his hands to curl his fingertips into Ran’s sides ever so slowly, grinning wider at the way Ran jumps and his breath hitches. “But i did tell you i’d get you back eventually to be fair.”

He did in fact tell him that, as he always does after their positions are the reverse of what they are right now, but Ran usually doesn’t take it too seriously. You can’t blame him when Jackie is cuddled into his chest, with his hair all messy and cheeks flushed red as he threatens him with revenge. But he’s learned by now that Jackie always gets revenge.

But that’s never stopped him before, being able to revel in his boyfriend’s laughter makes it a bearable price to pay. He’s still gonna complain about it though.

His thinking makes it easier for Jackie to catch him off guard, and Ran lets out a squeak and jerks away from his touch as he starts walking his fingers up his ribs. “Yohou’re so mehean.” He whines.

“You like it when i’m mean.” Jackie points out, rather rudely if you ask Ran, even if he is right. Jackie knows that if Ran wasn’t enjoying it, he wouldn’t be going along with what he says. “And be careful, you know what’ll happen if those arms come down.” There’s an even more teasy lilt to Jackie’s voice towards the end of his sentence, making the butterflies in Ran’s stomach flutter even more.

Ran whines again and turns his head away, avoiding looking at Jackie’s smug expression and holds his hands together even tighter from where they lay over his head. You suck, he wants to say.

Jackie’s fingers continue their trek up his ribs, taking their sweet time with it too, Ran having to hold himself back from arching right into them. He expects him to continue up under his arms, an easy spot to get him to bring them down for sure, but he instead moves right past them and up to his neck, making Ran bring his chin down to try and protect himself.

The action forces him to meet Jackie’s eyes, lit up with mischief and a touch of fondness that makes his ears feel warm. Jackie’s just prolonging his torment at this point, his fingers reaching the back of his neck before dragging his nails lightly over the sides again. Each time Ran tilts his head to one shoulder to block out his fingers, he just focuses more on the other side to get him to move back, the process repeating over and over.

Keeping his laughter in is something Ran is typically good at, but with all the anticipation Jackie is building up, it’s becoming much harder than usual, unable to stop the small giggles and trills from flowing through.

Jackie coos at each little noise, fingers trailing up to trace over his chin before making their way to his ears, the featherlight touch making Ran’s giggling grow louder and higher in pitch. A pretty funny change from his usual deep and smooth voice. “Aren’t you just the cutest thing?”

“I am nohohot!” Ran protests through his giggles and squeezes his eyes shut so he once again didn’t have to look at Jackie, and maybe it’ll help him get some of his composure back. Spoiler alert: it did not. It did quite the opposite of that.

The fingers finally moved off of his ears after a little while of tracing, Ran taking a second to relax his shoulders and slump into the bed. It’s short lived when that same gentle touch moves to his stomach, Ran yelping in surprise and his legs shooting up almost violently, his knees knocking into Jackie’s back.

In any other circumstances he probably would have apologized for that. But when Jackie simply giggles and coos out an “I know you have a very ticklish tummy, but you don’t have to hit me,” Ran decides that he no longer deserves one.

A snarky comment about how Jackie is certainly one to talk dies on his tongue at the feeling of blunt nails raking up the length of his stomach, before making their way back down once they reach his bottom ribs. He keeps it so slow and torturously light that it has Ran arching his back into it, a drawn out trill escaping from his throat.

He remembers Jackie’s giggly whines that light tickles are so much worse, and he has never understood more than he does right now. He’s barely touching him and yet it has Ran hiccuping into his arm at the way it lights up his nerves.

And because Ran is a fool he believes that Jackie decides to have mercy on him when his hands drift over his sides and sneak around towards his back, repeating the same up and down pattern on each side of his spine. It gets a wary mrrp out of him at first at how nice it suddenly feels, despite how slightly unbearable it was just a second ago.

Ran’s arms had already been tired from fighting to keep them up, so the very pleasant tickly feeling practically turns them into goo, his muscles all relaxing except to keep himself arched and give Jackie more access. Jackie smiles at him softly when he starts to hear Ran purr a little.

It almost makes him feel bad for what he’s about to do.

The fool in question nearly jumps two feet in the air with a loud squeal when a big raspberry is suddenly placed in the center of his stomach, and to make it worse Jackie now was using his arms to prop up his back, making him unable to curl up and try to escape the sensation, only pulling him further into it. It’s really no surprise when Ran’s arms come crushing down to lightly push at Jackie’s head, his defeat at that point already inevitable.

“Jahahackie!” Ran cackles and kicks his feet against the bed, his laughter being accompanied by a few snorts as Jackie peppers a few smaller raspberries around his stomach. “Okahahay! Yohou wihihin!”

Jackie finally lets up and pulls away, Ran almost becoming one with the bedsheets once his arms slipped out from under him. Jackie looks far too smug above him, but Ran loses the will to complain when Jackie starts rubbing over his stomach to help get rid of any lingering tickles.

After taking a moment to catch his breath, Ran opens his eyes and immediately glares at Jackie with all of the anger of a disgruntled kitten. “That was definitely an illegal move.”

“The only rule we made is that you couldn’t put your arms down, which you broke by the way,” Jackie points out, only slightly rubbing it in Ran’s face. “So since you lost, you know what that means, don’t you?”

Ran only remembers what he’s talking about when Jackie raises his hands to teasingly wiggle his fingers at him, clamping his hands over his mouth to keep himself from bursting into anticipatory giggles again. But since they both agreed on this, the only complaint he makes is a long, muffled whine, even while his tail starts wagging in excitement.

They’re definitely still gonna be here a while. Ran only has a little bit of regret.

#i’m tired #tickle fic #lee!ran #ler!jackie #this one was fun to write though #the cryptid writes

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castiel-has-bees · 4 years ago

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hunter x Hunter characters as things my gf has said/ conversations we‘ve had

Gon: I have absolutely no idea what the fuck I’m doing, but I seem to be succeeding😀

Killua: Gon it’s ping pong, and you’re losing by 17 points

—

Hisoka: I’m not homicidal, I’m homie-cidal

Illumi: I’m almost scared to ask what that means

Hisoka: instead of wanting to kill just anyone, I have the random urges to kill my friends😃

Illumi: ...

—

*making out*

Kurapika: oh shit, I forgot to say no homo before-

Leorio: bro

Kurapika: bro

—

Hisoka: you know, now that I think about it, when’s the last time anyone’s actually committed treason? like come on people, go out an live a little, be gay, commit treason

—

Feitan: yes, I’m short. But that won’t make it any less painful when I rip off all of your limbs

Snalnark: I was just asking if you wanted me to grab that for you-

—

Kurapika: I know they say revenge is a dish best served cold, but I’m a bitch so I’m gonna serve it hot as hell just as another way to say “fuck you”

#hxh fanart #hxh 2011 #hxh tag #hxh 1999 #hxh illumi #hxhedit #gon hxh #hxh leorio #hxh incorrect quotes #hxh memes #hunter x hunter #leorio #killua #gon #hisoka #alluka #illumi #anime #hunter hunter

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pirozhkiparty · 3 years ago

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Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Midoriya Izuku/Shinsou Hitoshi Characters: Shinsou Hitoshi, Midoriya Izuku Additional Tags: 5+1 Things, Fluff and Crack and Smut oh my, Cats, Domestic Fluff, Minor Injuries, Injury Recovery, Whipped Shinsou Hitoshi, mans is a gay mess for his boyf, Explicit Sexual Content, Top Shinsou Hitoshi, Bottom Midoriya Izuku Series: Part 3 of Sequel September Summary:

Five times Hitoshi and Izuku's cats interrupt their private time, and one time that Izuku has simply had enough.

#shindeku #shooks fics #for the 18+ baddies out there

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whengeorgiawentblue · 3 years ago

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I posted 6414 times in 2021

1246 posts created (19%)

5168 posts reblogged (81%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 4.1 posts.

I added 6641 tags in 2021

#cockles - 1539 posts

#misha collins - 1472 posts

#jensen ackles - 1331 posts

#destiel - 777 posts

#supernatural - 466 posts

#castiel - 308 posts

#jared padalecki - 268 posts

#art - 195 posts

#jenmish - 145 posts

#j2 - 140 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#people will think you are gay for the 10 years anniversary or the chest to chest selfie or the hundreds of gay stuff you have done with mish

My Top Posts in 2021

Misha, what the f*ck are you trying to tell us

321 notes • Posted 2021-10-18 16:39:59 GMT

An anti-Misha blog, right after Jensen announced the spn prequel:

The same anti-Misha blog, right after the J2 fallout:

(By the extra they mean Misha Collins)

Revenge is a dish best served cold!

Enjoy the schadenfreude!

(Source: anti-blog)

544 notes • Posted 2021-06-27 09:59:39 GMT

Is.. is that the pride flag + the BISEXUAL FLAG?

1096 notes • Posted 2021-08-25 23:14:07 GMT

https://twitter.com/jolauriang/status/1457394419095777283

LMFAO WHAT

1758 notes • Posted 2021-11-07 17:36:16 GMT

They are so unbelievably cute

1789 notes • Posted 2021-01-03 13:25:04 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review #sorry people but the last pic is a fake and I didn't know it :(#anyway still cute

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popculturebuffet · 4 years ago

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Top 10 Thanksgiving Episodes

Happy Thanksgiving Everybody! Time to eat a ton, pass out, and watch MST3K and all that. And since I already covered most of the general stuff about how diffrent this holiday is in my Loud House Review, and to reitarate to anyone having a big, 20 or so people crammed in a room thanksgiving this year

For the rest of us like all of the big three of Holidays, thanksgivings also the time for some classic episodes of television. Granted most shows stick to one, with some exceptions like friends, roseanne and new girl, but most make their one count. Thanksgiving may not be as big as the holidays it’s sandwitched in between, to the point christmas is slowly but surely trying to swallow it whole, but it’s still a time for family, fighting, and food that brings plenty of opprotunity for greatness and even with a smaller pool, I stiill had signifigant trouble narrowing down my list to 10. But I stand by what I got it wittled down to. This is my top 10 thanksgiving episodes! And for my regular readers, there’s a suprising lack of animation but i’m more than willing ot go outside that and now’s the right time, asi’m currently having a black friday sale with reviews marked down by two bucks to just 3 dollars for an episode of any tv show. Yes it’s a shameless plug but since when have I ever had shame? So with that in mind let’s chow down, it’s my top 10 thanksgiving episodes!

10. Pangs (Buffy the Vampire Slayer) Buffy is as a show I REALLY need to revisit. While lately, what with the abuse he did that we can’t get details on when making justice league or his you know cheating on his wife on and off over a decade, I’m not at all a fan of series creator Joss Whedon, Buffy itself is still a classic in my eyes.

The tale of a teenager given the role of the Slayer, a chosen female asskicker given moderate super powers and the duty to defend the world from vampires and other ghouls. The show dealt with the usual teen superhero stuff, ballancing asskicking with saving the world and arguably codified the genre, to the point I hold it at least partially responsible for the bigger wave of teen heroes in the 2000′s in animation and comics. The show had smart dialouge, metaphors, mythology and a rich, and vibrant cast. Sure some things haven’t aged well like an adult vampire dating a teenager or the really dated ways Willow’s sexuality were handled, as groundbreaking as it was, from barely letting her kiss her girlfriend or be shown being intimate iwth her, or just entirley shutting out the posiblity she’s bisexual. But a few age wrinkles aside the show is still good and I still need to rewatch it and that includes our number 10 pangs, one of hte most memorable and well done thanksgiving specials and one fo the shows more comedy moments. It’s thanksgiving, and Buffys mom’s going out of town, so she decides to hold thanksgiving at Giles place to bring her slowly drifting surrogate family together. Naturally given the way things usually go for our Slayer, she has a hard time of it as Willow chafes at celebrating colonolsim, Giles dosen’t get what the big fuss is about that or the meal being british, and Spike shows up looking for protection from season big bads the initiative, a secret military unit that’s chipped him so he can’t harm humans, so he has no way to eat and spends the mal tied to a chair. Oh and of course, a vengeful native american spriti from the chumash tribe has given Xander syphilis and killed a currator as revenge for his people’s suffering, so now Buffy has to fight a ghost bear if she want sa happy thanksgiving. Also Angel is back in town and being kind of a dick, but hey it leads to a good episode of his spinoff so whatever.

Pangs is just a fun episode, not only does it do well by not ignoring american colonalisim, but it just has a fun energy to it as Buffy desperately tries to have a good thanksgiving, Spike instnatly proves his worth as an addition to the gang both chemstiry and comedy wise, and we of course get this classic moment.

It had to fight it’s way onto the list, but pangs is a holiday dish worthy of sinking your fangs into.

9. The Dressing (Aqua Teen Hunger Force) Speaking of nutty fun thanksgiving episodes.. this one is simply that. I love Aqua Teen Hunger force.. even if like a lot of comedy shows it drooped in later seasons, it still has it’s classics earlier on and even later on has a few gems. But on the earlier on side we have their utterly bonkers and delightful thanksgiving episode “The Dressing”, a sequel to the Christmas Episode “The Cybernetic Ghost of Christmas Past from The Future”, which itself is an utter classic, but we’ll possibly get to that in december’s list.

The Aqua Teens are having Thanksgiving with Carl, whose naturally onlyt here for the free food and staying outside. it’s also days before or after, with black colored frito pie,a t urkey, and whatever else their broke selves could scrounge up. However, naturally, like Buffy a normal day for the Aqua Teens just isn’t complete without some weird shit happening, thanksgiving gets interrupted by the cybernetic ghost of Christmas past fromt he future, whose transformed himself into a turkey and wants to save their turkey so it can lead a rebellion in the bizzare hilarious distopian hellscape he comes from. This of course leads to him getting drunk, eating all their food and later showing up with a laser sock to murder carl after the episodes over. It’s just a fun time, a really funny episode and one of the teens more memorable outings. Not a lot to say here, it’s just really damn funny.

8. Arnold’s Thanksgiving (Hey Arnold!) Anoter classic I really need to revist but that more than earns his place here. Hey Arnold.. is easily one of the best animated shows ever. I say that with no hyperbole as it handled slice of life well while still getting dramatic when needed to, and is easily the gold standard for slice of life children’s cartoons to this day. And naturally it’s holiday specials were great, and I only r eally haven’t revisited them because they also hurt.. a lot. So unsuprisingly this one makes the list.

IT’s thanksgiving and given how chaotic things are for both Arnold and Helga’s families, our heroes are miserable. Arnold would understandably like just once to have thanksgiving on thanksgiving, his family instead doing fourth of july due to his grandmother being who she is. And Helga naturally is ignored and mistrteated as usual since her sisters home and her dad and alchoholic mother ignore her as usual even when she’s not around. What i’m saying is while Arnold’s issue is understandable, helga always wins a “whose got the shitter life” contest.

So the two flee to their teacher Mr Simmons, a character I genuinely loved and loved even more finding out he was gay as an adult, as he was a kind , supportive teacher who could be a bit softhearted but wasn’t afraid to step the fuck up when needed. But they find his thanksgiving isn’t much better, as his Mother and wont’ stop sniping at his boyfriend peter and clearly isn’t entirely comfortable with her son’s sexuality, his friend keeps snapping at peter and mooching off him, and his uncle.. well he’s just a loud asshole who wants turkey.. The kids naturally realize the meaning of the holiday, reconclie with their families who DID take genuine steps to make up for them being gone and missed them, all is well. It just shows nobody’s family is perfect, and is well done in that but also shows why thanksgiving has grown beyond it’s roots: It’s a day for families to get together and even if they may fight, recognize why they love one another. I also give the show balls for heavily imiplying a character is gay and not slapping a girlfriend on him or any of the usual bollocks: Simmons just very clearly is gay and it’s as transparent as the show could get at the time, with the show making it crystal clear years later with the revivial movie. Nice. We’ll have more servings of thanksgiving classics after the cut.

7. Slapsgiving (How I Met Your Mother) Oh How I Met Your Mother. You started out really good but boy did that go downhill fast and land in a nuclear inferno didn’t it? But I can bitch about the How I Met Your Mother Ending some other time, and probably will. In the show’s prime before they decided to stick with an ending no one wanted anymore, it was pretty great and while season 1′s also impressive Thanksgiving outing “Belly Full of Turkey” was considered, there was ultimately one slaptastic king when it came to Thanksgiving: Slapsgiving.

Naturally for this show Slapsgiving ties into the show’s suprisngly deep and rich lore: The season before this, Marshall and Barney made a “Slap Bet”, which is exactly what it says on the tin: A bet where the winner slaps the looser. And due to Barney prematurely slapping Marshall, Marshall got 5 penalty slaps to be dolled out whenever, one in that episode and another in a coda to another. For his next one though Marshall decided to outdo himself and set up a counter.. and it all comes down to thanskgiving. So we get a good ten minutes of Jason Siegel making meancing slap based refrences while NPH’s barney cowers in fear before Marshall’s wife lily pumps the breaks on the bet as comissoner.. only to reconsider when Barney makes the mistake of tormenting Marshall over it, resuling in the inevitible, and in THE thanksgiving song.

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Basically it’s what happen when you give three really funny people a subplot together. Magic happens. The subplot is not bad either as a pre-totallyinsufferabledouchebag Ted hooks up with Robin again over lingering feelings and thanksgiving prep and the two have to deal with that... though it’s mostly funny for Robin’s new boyfriend, who Future Ted acknowledges is barely older than them, but admits to remembering as decrept old man, which results in a 30 something’s dialouge coming out of a very old man and me laughing very hard. A simple joke but one that really works. Overall a slaptacular good time.

6. Two Turkeys (Brooklyn Nine-Nine)

NINE NINE BITCHES! I’m honestly shocked I haven’t talked about Brooklyn Nine Nine on here already, but it’s easily one of the best sitcoms in recent memory, if not of all time. It has one of the best ensemble casts, great jokes and timing, yet still ballances things out with a sense of realisim beneath the madness> It’s also noticable for holding it’s officers more accountable than most real world police departments, to the point all scripts that were written up for next season were thrown out post George Floyd. It’s truly a joy to watch.

So naturally they’ve had their share of Holiday episodes, with them easily having the best crop of halloween episodes since roseanne with their annual heists, and having some pretty damn memorable christmases, opening with this:

So naturally thanksgiving is no exception, with it’s last two being the best and it being a really hard choice wether to go with season 4′s “Detective Santiago” or this one. But as good as the other ep was.. this one inched it out for good reason.

The episode’s split into two equally good, equally hilarious plot lines. In the B-Plot, the 99′s Captain Raymond Holt, one of the best characters in sitcom history and gay icon, and his husband Kevin take their annual trip to get a pie for Holt’s families thanksgiving and come back with the well crafted pie, even if both prefer their food nice and bland. But the pie go missing and Captain Holt procedes to hilariously drill into each of the other members of the 99 and uncovering holes int their previous thanksgving stories with Rosa’s being suprisingly heartwarming (She’s going to a humilating minons on ice show with her family because they reconnected in jail.. setting up the equally awesome “Game Night” episode where she comes out.) and Boyle’s being utterly pathetic as you’d expect (Cooking his son mac and cheese because he’ll eat nothing else and declaring him a “basic bitch”). The solution however ends up being heartwarming as the culprit is actually Kevin, who hated the pie.. as did Raymond who suggests just taking the drive anyway because they enjoy the silent ride there and back every year. It may be boring to us.. but it’s preicious and really sweet all the same.. as it is hilarous when Kevin treats this as a big endugence and seems turned on by that. What i’m saying is these men are couple goals and Marc Evan Jakcson was awesome long before ducktlaes. The main plot is also great, as Jake and Amy, now engaged after this year’s halloween episode which is also , coincidentally, the series best, try to unite their families. It just goes about as well as you’d expect as Amy’s are type a control freaks, jake’s mom is a retired hippie school teacher and his dad is a human disaster area who has to be told to put on pants, cheated on his mom constantly, somehow got her back, and in general is barely functional on a good day. The families do bond breifly but things ineveitbly break down, hilarity and severed limbs insue and family comes together. IT’s just a funny, well done 20 mintues that’s also really damn sweet, with this plot ending with Amy’s dad accepting the chaos as that’s’ts what you do with family. Also jake naturally finds out he has a ton of step siblings as his dad was and still is a man whore. Happy Thanksgiving!

5. Bart Vs Thanksgiving (The SImpsons)

Let’s face it: if you follow my reviews at all you knew this was coming. While not one I go back to due to being an emotional kidney punch, i’d be doing this list a diservice if this classic wasn’t on there. In a nutshell, Bart starts a petty fight with Lisa over her centerpiece that ends with it in the fireplace, Bart sent to his room till he apologizes, and Bart seething insiting he did no wrong. It takes a visit to the homeless shelter after running away, and ending up on the news, to realize what an ass he’s been and one nightmarish dream sequence later, seriously why do you think I don’t revisit this one that often? This thing has traumatized me since I was a kid and unlike the slap song I will not be showing it to you, has a heartwarming reconcliation with his sister on the roof. It’s just a nice, sweet special that gets the holiday just right and i’d expect nothing less from Golden Age Simpsons.

4. A Deep Fried Korean Thanksgiving (Gilmore Girls) Another show I need to talk about more, Gilmore Girls is fucking awesome. The story of a woman who ran away pregnant at age 16 and built her own life for her daughter in the quirky town of stars hollow who finds herself reconnecting with her parents in present day against her will.. is really good stuff. Funny, heartfelt and really damn well acted with one hell of a cast, the show is part of me and I make no bones about that, so it’s big thanksgiving outing naturally belongs on here. The premise is simple: Rory and Loreli end up having to go to four diffrent thanksgivings, which even for big eaters like them is a massive task, each unique and entertaining. The main event of course is Suki’s, where everyone’s faviorite chef agreed to let her husband cook the turkey.. of course with the plan to sneak in mid cooking and add her own touches. This gets foiled when Jackson and his family decide to deep fry the thing.. probably in part because Jackson knows his wife well and knows what she was planning. Though over the night while our heroines are at their other meals, it devolves into them deepfrying everything they can get their hand son including a shoe, and Suki getting plastered to tolerate it. While not topping it the other meals and the sheer lunacy of four thanksigvings in one day, are still memorable: There’s the natural posh one at Richards and Emilys, the dour joyless one at The Kims where Mrs Kim forces the band to play the whole time and forces our heroines to eat food as joyless as Mrs. Kim, and Lukes for a nice round of Rory grappling with having PDA with her boyfirend Jess before resolving it at the end. Also dean’s a jackass. No one is suprised. Jess isn’t one at this stage in his character which is. Also Kirk adopts a cat that slowly pushes him out of his own house which works comedically becaus Sean Gunn is a national treasure. Overall a really good episode and if you have netflix and haven’t checked the series out, this is a good one to try out.

3. The Thanksgiving Special (Regular Show) I already talked about this one in my top 11 Regular Show episodes so i’ll try to be brief. In a nutshell Mordecai and Rigby destroy thanksgiving and genuinelly feeling bad about it, scramble to win a thanksgiving bird from a Thanksgiving Song Contest, going up against an all star super group comissioned by Donald Trump. Yes really. Meanwhile Muscle Man and High Five Ghost go to get sides and the rest of the park staff’s attemtps to get a turkey are thwarted by a bunch of thanksgiving reinactors who go unexplained in any way shape or form which given how rare that is for regular show, which usually has some sort of explination for the madness, just makes it funnier. It ends with a REALLY touching song, a fight on a blimp with outgoing president trump, and a truly heartwarming thanksgiving meal. All in all a nice special that combines the shows madcap nature with the genuine warm fuzzies of thanksgiving.

2. We Gather Together (Roseanne) Another series I need to talk about more.. and another series where one of the creators has turned out to be a terrible human being. Seriously Roseanne Barr is is a terible person, she deserved to be removed from her show, and while the Conner’s isn’t GREAT it’s still FAR better without her. That being said I will still stick up for the original as she wasn’t the only one involved (indeed the aformentioned Joss Whedon worked on the show breifly and Gilmore Girls creator Amy Sherman Paladino not only worked there but later adapted one of Roseanne’s insane antics, making all the writers wear caps with a number instead of referring to them by name , to Gilmore Girls.). Her being a bad person even then dosen’t change the fact that the show is sitcom gold, one of my faviorite shows, and a true classic. And this episode helps showcase WHY.

What makes this episode special, even among Roseanne episodes is it’s structure: While there are things going on it’s mostly a free floating day in the Families life and thus feels like your there with them through thanksgiving. It feels genuine, like past thanksgivings i’ve remembered: Everyone has their own stuff going on, they all eat, and there’s naturally a big blowup.. and one that eveyrone else ignores to eat which I can relate to. That authenticity really elevates the episode and is why I seek it out every year.

That’s not to say nothing happens, it just flows in and out like it would in a normal thanksgiving. Roseanne deals with her parents, a pre-abuser version of her dad and her overbearing nightmare of a mother beverly, and the inevetible blow up when Bev’s needling about Jackie’s life goes too far , prompting Jackie to reveal her new job as a police officer before bursting into tears, all to Roseanne’s annoyance. Rosie also moves them to a hotel despite an attempted guilt trip from her mom.

Speaking of Mom’s we see Dan’s for the only time before the later seasons and the utterly terrible last season, a professional career woman whose moved on well from her ex and brought her new boyfriend there. Ed, despite some comptemplation over it is firmly accepting and instead starts flirting with the Conner’s friend Crystal. Dan, being overprotective because of his Daddy Issues, but ed cals him out on it “Being lonely is a hell of a lot for two people to have in common, you woudln’t knwo anything abotu that son, and I pray to god you never do” A great caper to a fantastic episode.. one I thought was going to top the list... THOUGHT is the key word here...

1. Turkey in A Can (Bob’s Burgers) This one is. Bob’s Burgers is one of the best things to come out of the 2010′s and i’ve fallen way too far behind on it, so I can’t say if any thanksgivings after thankshoarding top this one.. what I can say is this one is the gold standard for thanksgiving episodes, and is filled with great stuffing.

Thanksgiving is Bob’s holiday. Being a chef he loves the chance to go all out, and really flex his muscles for his families when it comes to cooking up a storm, and it’s endearing when bob gets just as nuts as his family. But this year someone keeps flushing his turkeys down the toilet despite his best efforts, so while Louise hilariously tries to solve things to proe it wasn’t her (though it’s entirely fair they thought it was her consdering.. everything), while LInda, Gene and LInda’s flighty sister Gale try to write THE thanksgiving song. And while it’s no you just got slapped, damn if they didn’t succeed.

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Sailors in your mouth indeed. It leads to plenty of great jokes the best being the guy at the Deli Counter thinking Bob’s into him and bob not being sure how to respond, but being mildly recpetive. But the climax is what makes the episode as when Bob falls asleep we find his medication has been making him sleepwalk.. and thus put the turkey s int he toilet, as Tina’s desire to be at the Grown Up Table, itslef a REALLY funny runner as you’d expect, has him panicking internally and thus reliving her potty training. The episode ends with Bob letting her come to the adults table, and a rather heartwarming thanksgiving feast. All in all an excellent episode. It also leads to the chaos seen above whic hif htat’s not thanksgiving, I don’t know what is.

Have a happy thanksgiving and check out my black friday sale! Until then there’s always another rainbow!

#thanksgiving #top 10 #bob's burgers #gilmore girls #buffy the vampire slayer #aqua teen hunger force #hey arnold #how I met your mother #the simpsons #roseanne #regular show #brooklyn nine nine #brooklyn 99 #99

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