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Mithrun's desire as an SA analogue
TW discussion of SA and detailed breakdown of aesthetics evoking SA. The way I discuss this is vivid in a way that may be triggering, though there is no discussion of actual sexual assault. Just survivor's responses to it.
People relate to Mithrun and see his condition as an analogue for a few different things, like brain injury or depression. And I think all of them are there. But I also see Mithrun's story as an SA analogue, and Ryoko Kui intentionally evokes those aesthetics. I think it's a part of Mithrun's character that a lot of people miss, but I very much consider it text. This is partially inspired by @heird99's post on what makes this scene so disturbing; so check out their post, too :)

So to start off with, the demon invades Mithrun's bed, specifically. There's even a canopy around it, which specifically evokes this idea of personal intrusion; the barrier is being pulled apart without consent or warning. The way the hand reaches towards Mithrun's body from outside of the panel division makes it almost look like the goat stroking over his body. It's an especially creepy visual detail; similarly, the goat's right hand parts into the side of the panel as well. It's literally like it's tearing the page apart; but gently. So gently.
Mithrun is in bed. It is his bed that the demon is intruding on. He's in a position of intimacy. The woman behind him is a facsimile of his "beloved" that he left behind; the woman who, in reality, chose Mithrun's brother. He is in bed with his fantasy lover, who is leaning over him. While this scene isn't explicitly sexual, it is intimate. And it is being invaded. The goat lifts Mithrun gently, who is confused, but not yet struggling.

The erotics of consumption and violence in Ryoko Kui's work(remember that the word 'erotic' can have many different meanings, please) are a... notable part of some of her illustrations. I would say she blurs the lines between all forms of desire: personal, sexual, gustatory and carnal, in her illustrations in order to emphasize the pure desire she wants to work with and evoke to serve her themes. Kui deploys sexual imagery in a lot of places in Dungeon Meshi, and this is one of them.
In this case, horrifically. The goat's assault begins with drooling, licking, and nuzzling. The goat could be enjoying and "playing with" its food. But it can also be interpreted as it "preparing" Mithrun with its tongue as it begins to literally breach Mithrun's body. The goat also invades directly through his clothing; that adds another level of disturbing to me. There's nothing Mithrun can do in this moment of violation. Mithrun is fighting, but he is fighting weakly, trying to grip on and push away when he has no ability or option to. All he can do is beg the goat to stop. And it doesn't care. This all evokes sexual assault.
The sixth panel demonstrates a somewhat sexual position, with Mithrun's thighs spread around the goat's hunched over body. In the next, the goat pulls and holds apart Mithrun's thighs as he nuzzles into him. The way the clothing bunches up looks a bit as if it has been pushed up. It has pinned Mithrun down onto the bed, into Mithrun's soft furs and pillows. It takes a place made to be supernaturally warm and comfortable, and violates it. It's utterly and intimately horrifying. To me, this sequence of positions directly evokes a rape scene. I think Kui did this very explicitly. These references to sexual invasion are part of what makes this scene so disturbing; albeit, to many viewers, subconsciously.
This is also the moment the goat takes Mithrun's eye. Other than this, the goat seems exceptionally strong, but also... gentle. It holds Mithrun's body tightly, but moves it around slowly. It doesn't need to hurt Mithrun physically. But in that moment, it takes Mithrun's eye. Blood seeps from a wound while an orifice that should not be pierced is penetrated. This moment, the ooze of blood in one place specifically, also evokes rape. That single bit of physical gore is a very powerful bit of imagery to me.
Finally; it is Mithrun's desire that is eaten. After his assault, Mithrun can find no pleasure in things that he once did. He is fully disassociated from his emotions. This is a common response to trauma, especially in the case of SA. It's not uncommon for people to never, or take a long time to, enjoy sex in the same way again; or at all. They might feel like their rapist has robbed them of a desire and pleasure they once had. I think this makes Mithrun's lack of desire a partial analogue for the trauma of sexual assault.
Mithrun's desire for revenge was, supposedly, all that remained. Anger at his assaulter, anger at every being that was like it; though, perhaps not anger. Devotion, in a way. To his cause. I don't know. But the immediate desire to seek revenge is another response to SA. But on to Mithrun's true feelings on the matter.
This is... So incredibly tragic. Mithrun feels used up. Like his best parts have been taken away. Like he's being... tossed aside. This certainly parallels the way assault victims can feel after being left by an abuser. Or the way assault victims feel they might be "ruined" forever for other partners. These are common sentiments for survivors to carry, and need to overcome. In the text, it's almost like Mithrun feels the only being who can desire him is a demon who might "finish devouring" him. That that's his only use. It's worth noting that Mithrun trusted the demon. Mithrun's world was built by the demon, and Mithrun, in that way, was cared for by the demon. I think this reinforces Mithrun's place as a victim.
There's also something to be said about Mithrun as a victim of his own possessive romantic and sexual desire. The mirror shows him his beloved just dining with his brother, and it infuriates him. He doesn't know if the vision is real, nor if she has really chosen his brother as a romantic partner. The goat then creates a whole fantasy world where she loves him. As Mithrun's dungeon deteriorates, she is the only person that continues to exist. Mithrun continues to have control over her. And that is the strongest desire the demon is eating, isn't it? There's something interesting there, but I don't know what to say about it.
In conclusion, I think Mithrun's story is an explicit analogue for sexual assault-- though, certainly, among other things! The way the scene plays out and is composed explicitly references sexual violation and invasion of the body. His condition mirrors common trauma responses to sexual violence. And, at the end, he finally realizes he can recover.
Let's end on a happy Mithrun, after taking the first step on his journey to recovery :) You aren't vegetable scraps Mithrun. But even if you were-- every single thing in this world has value. Even vegetable scraps.
#Mithrun#mithrun dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi#ren rambles#dungeon meshi meta#tag later#I refuse to post at prime time look at my dunmeshi meta boy#tw sa#sa tw#this is literally 1200 words slash 6 pages if I added citations and a proper essay format as well as an introduction to Mithrun's character#and general introduction of the text itself#this could literally be an academic paper#lmao#ren meta#rb this plsss i want ppl to read my essay
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After some super brief research, it looks like people in Japan are diagnosed with autism at almost twice the rate of most countries, including the UK. This means there's... quite possibly more awareness there than in many Western countries. And when you think about the amount of work it takes to make it in the manga industry, everyone in it pretty much has to be obsessive about their interests; I wouldn't be surprised if the field attracted a higher rate of autistic people than most. Given just how accurate Laios is as an autistic character... I would honestly be shocked if Ryoko Kui wasn't close with someone with autism. Or is autistic herself, for all I know. I won't speculate on that.
I've seen a lot of people talk about how the most well written autistic representation usually is unintentional, because "intended" representation often fits into a stereotypical box informed by "savant" stories instead of those of real life autistic people. But stereotypical character writing is not a problem in Dungeon Meshi. Ryoko Kui is an exceptional character writer. Her characters feel like real people, reflecting much more than straightforward tropes from the genre. Kui, like most good character writers, probably takes a lot of inspiration from the many people she's met and known in her life. Not just characters she's read in stories.
Even if Kui doesn't define Laios as an autistic character, I'd say that it's obvious that he's heavily informed by real life autistic people. And that's... not a claim I've made in my entire life, actually. I usually don't like diagnosing characters as part of an analysis of text; I think it can be reductive. But Laios' experiences with characters like Shuro and Kabru read so heartwrenchingly well as a narrative about trying to form relationships as specifically an autistic person.
I don't want to Laiosrant and cite my sources too much here but in conclusion he's autistic and I believe it's likely he was intended to be. And if he wasn't, he was informed by real life people with the pattern of traits and brain differences that psychology has defined as autism. And in the end, I don't think that difference really matters, actually.
i don't really like when people say dungeon meshi is accidentally good autistic representation, because while i understand not wanting to make conclusions without explicit confirmation from the author, there's always the weird assumption that non-western authors somehow don't know about things like neurodivergency/queerness/etc. (on top of the assumptions that east asian authors are somehow more naive or oblivious to "western" social issues).
given that dungeon meshi started being published in 2014, it's not really a "work belonging to its times"—it's as contemporary as any other media we discuss on this site, which means it should be fair to assume it engages with contemporary topics (and at the very least, you shouldn't say that the representation is accidental with so much confidence)
but anyways, the chapter "perfect communication" in ryoko kui's "terrarium in a drawer" is some of the most straightforward autistic representation I've seen, and from now on I'm going to assume that laios's character writing is absolutely intentional in that regard:


#I think taking those experiences outside of the lens of a label can actually be a benefit to character writing#and your experience of the world tbh#which is why i hesitate to diagnose characters#but uh. Your honor that man is so autistic.#its interesting my first dungeon meshi post is about laios bcs while i love him marcille is my favorite#though i guess i have less to say about her writing than him... i should though.#i have a habit of assuming things are already part of people's interpretation when they aren't...#dungeon meshi#ren rambles#laios touden#also pwease rb if u like this. not because i want notes but because i want people to see this#join me in the laios understanding club#ren meta
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Another reason I'm an Akechi Lives truther: cognition, baby. Vanilla P5 reveals that Morgana only lived in the end due to the Thieves' cognition/bond with him. Persona 5 Royal made the conscious choice to give Akechi endure, which lets you survive a fatal hit at 1 HP if you max his confidant, and maxing his confidant is the only way he appears in the postcredits. If ever there was a place where power of love, bonds, or cognition could make a miracle happen, it's the Metaverse. So maybe we don't need a huge, complex explanation. Maybe the connection Joker and Akechi share is enough. Now if only Atlus would give us a followup...
#goro akechi#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5r#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#p5 joker#shuake#p5 meta#akechi goro
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The claim that "shuake wouldn't work out because Akechi tried to kill Joker" is funny to me because Joker canonically prefers "just everyday Akechi" over detective prince Akechi.
We have proof of Joker's preference in the third semester. Okumura was revived as a loving father in accordance to Haru's wishes and Akechi was revived as his maniacal, violent self in accordance to Joker's wishes.
Joker could have revived Akechi to be any iteration of kind and friendly but he didn't. Instead, he wanted Akechi to have the same personality as his black mask self, the same personality of the man who attempted to kill him. Joker canonically prefers Akechi's true personality, whether the player agrees with him or not.
#persona 5 royal#persona 5#shuake#akeshu#p5r#p5#goro akechi#akira kurusu#ren amamiya#my post#p5r textposts#p5r meta posts#persona 5 meta#meta analysis
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a seemingly small but actually crucially important thing about anime ren's characterization i didn't like is that he was not at all hesitant to enter the metaverse with ryuji when it's a critical character moment for him that he super super is. at the beginning of persona 5 he is defeated. he doesn't want to fight anymore. he wants to let the adults shove him down in a little box and become a perfect little member of society. being convicted broke him.
it's not until his awakening that he admits to himself that saving that woman was not a mistake, and he chooses to keep the will of rebellion alive in his heart by choosing to stay and save ryuji, even if his soul be damned for it. that moment, and every moment after when joker continues to choose to rebel, does not hit the way it should without first establishing that he is incredibly close to giving up entirely, and without finding ryuji, he probably would have.
#maybe one day ill write a whole meta about all the ways the anime failed joker cause it is So Many#but being real i probably wont. regardless for now have this#akira kurusu#ren amamiya#joker p5#p5#sera posts
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I just NEED everyone to agree with me that Rey's parents are nobody. We should all agree about that. We should collectively, as an audience, say, "clearly the best idea was to have Kylo Ren be a dynastic heir to the major legends of the Force who wants to throw off his family's shadow, while his rival is nobody from nowhere who wants to belong--so we're going to stick with that."

And then, what should have happened is, Rey can finish her story by being able to say, "My parents might have abandoned me, but that doesn't mean I'm worthless." And eventually Kylo Ren can say, "My family might have been powerful, but I don't have to be," and all those other things that they can bounce off of each other as great foils.
It can keep being a good story about accepting past failures and choosing to grow beyond them.
Let's just all collectively ignore Rey Skypatine because of how silly that was. I mean. If they can just ignore the setups in the previous movie, we can ignore their choices in the conclusion. Right?? Right? Tell me I'm right
#Rey#Rey Skywalker#Rey palpatine#Reylo#Kylo Ren#Ben solo#lucasfilm#Disney Star Wars#Star Wars#Star Wars sequels#Star Wars sequel trilogy#Rey nobody#Rey of jakku#Daisy Ridley#Adam driver#rian johnson#jj abrams#meta#the last Jedi#the rise of Skywalker#tros
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Hey, so I don't want to be that guy, but when are we going to acknowledge that Akechi was right?
No, I obviously don't mean about the things he was very clearly wrong about. I'm referring to the things he says in interviews about the Phantom Thieves. I hate how many people switch up after playing through his betrayal who previously agreed with his views, because nothing he said is wrong and nothing he did changes that fact. He speaks in the TV Station on the objective facts that he should know about, and with or without the context of his form of justice those facts stay true. It's a fallacy to claim that his form of justice being universally less approved of makes the Phantom Thieves better by comparison, or discredits anything he said. I don't think the Phantom Thieves are evil, or that they should necessarily be imprisoned, but I do think that they are not morally sound. They're kids. Prior to his betrayal I think he served his purpose well, but it's easy to disregard the validity of his words when you find out that he's a murderer. With the knowledge he SHOULD have had (and that many DID have), everything he says is true. And honestly? It still can be true for basically the entire plot of the game. Mishima's confidant tests the thieves in that way. They could have changed the hearts of anyone who's not a persona user, for any personal reason. It's a slippery slope.
I'll use these three options as an example for why he's right:

"They're justice itself" is just subjective and incorrect, because justice as a concept is individualized and given how each Phantom Thief has different reasons for being one it's ridiculous for even them to say. Their first target was before they even formed a group, and Ann was ready to kill Kamoshida. The others were not even going to step in, and they were going to respect her choice either way. All the members are so different, so this is an insane claim to make.
"They're necessary" is wrong because to say they are necessary is pretty disingenuous to all "justice" that has ever happened BEFORE they existed. I don't believe that the Thieves were a necessity per say, and personally I think their actions can only be judged on a case by case basis. Some Mementos targets for example have issues that stem beyond what they have done. Now they have their desires stolen but still have the issue that pushed them to immortality in the first place, plus a shitton of guilty baggage. The Thieves only help with the atonement, but not the push. How many of those people didn't just go right back to their past behaviors? How many of them got worse in other ways? Think about Futaba, she felt so guilty for something she thought she did, she formed a palace to condemn herself to die alone. To claim the Thieves are necessary to reform society implies that their method is the most effective, and I think that's a lot to claim for something they don't understand.
"They do more than the cops" I almost agree with. Legally the police in Japan in this game anyway (yes I'm aware it extends to reality in many ways, but I'm referring to just the game right now) are corrupt and flawed for the most part, but the thing I don't agree with is that this makes the Thieves a better alternative. They're not. For the same reason Yoshizawa says later, the Thieves can only do so much as vigilantes, and to imply that society should rely on these faceless nameless flawed people to fix society is not any better than what they have now. Especially with the method being unknown, potentially unsafe, and easily exploitable. I cannot be the only one who if the Phantom Thieves were real, would be extremely alarmed by the prospect of a group of vigilantes "changing hearts" right? It's so vague, and the pattern is dystopian. At least police methods are familiar
What I'm saying is that they're kids, and it's kind of insane that this game places Akechi as the narrative foil for the Thieves in their message and then makes it so easy to disregard because "he's an assassin so how could he know anything about justice". The Thieves don't either, and Ann was nearly a murderer. If the bar is "don't commit murder when you're infiltrating someone's mind" then it's far too low. I wouldn't trust a group of adults with this power to reform society, even less a group of teenage vigilantes. I'm 19, and I find this odd. And Strikers frames them as even more righteous, and it bugs me even more in that game. At least Royal has the third semester to give a bit more nuance to how big of a responsibility Ren was given, but that's also very frequently misinterpreted.
I love this game, and I love this fandom, and I have thoughts that get weird and ranty. I apologize, but I hope you all found this as interesting as I did.
#persona 5#p5#goro akechi#p5r#persona#persona 5 royal#p5 royal#ren amamiya#shuake#akeshu#p5 meta#analysis#philosophy#rants#this is longer than i was intending#please reblog and add to this#i love yapping about this game and i will respond to everyone
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Thinking more about Akechi's rank 3, and about its flow into rank 4 at the jazz club—where Akechi begins to open up to Ren, by taking him somewhere special to him that he hasn't shared with anyone else.
Don't you think it seems off, on a first glance? Like it doesn't work? Because Akechi does not seem to entirely appreciate Ren's intervention. If you look at their phone call afterwards, it seems like Akechi lost control in the café, and is trying to take that back from Ren. He threatens him with what Ren "took" from him!—"I'll be dictating everything, from hair to accessories". Ren dictated the hair and accessories in rank 3, and now Akechi needs to do the same!
Make no mistake, this exchange, while cute as a button, is also Akechi struggling to regain some control that he feels he lost. He needs payback; he needs to meet Ren's challenge; he needs more.
So what's going on?
always in chains
As Akechi mentions in the engine room:
This line, of course, suffers in translation, so let's take a closer look:
Akechi 君は、今までの自分とか、人間関係とか⋯そういうものに囚われない。 kimi wa, ima made no jibun to ka, ningen kankei to ka… sou iu mono ni torawarenai You don't allow yourself to be enslaved by such things as human relations or past selves…
Did you understand this line on its first pass? Or at all? "Past selves"? What is this, Akechi, are we bringing in reincarnation now? What do you even mean by "human relations", is this a biology class?
Let's rework it a little. ima made no jibun—that's "the you until now". We might say "who you've always been". And ningen kankei—well, that is "human relations", translated very literally. But nobody would ever say that—it just means "relationships"! When you talk about your ningen kankei, you're often talking about your skills with relationships—how you get on with people. And Akechi gets on with people very well.
So what is he actually saying?
You don't allow yourself to be enslaved by such things as human relations or past selves… You're not a slave to expectations, or to how others see you.
Akechi will later tell us that these chains have bound him since his earliest days:
Those chains are the core of the resentment and envy he feels for Ren. More than anything Shido could potentially do to him, the expectations of others are what bind and torment Akechi. And this difference in how Akechi and Ren respond to outside pressure is one of the most important contrasts between them.
back to rank 3
So what does all of this tell us about rank 3, when Akechi is spotted by celebrity hunters?
In this situation, Akechi can't do anything but leave. He has to be the good boy everyone expects. He can't just sit there soaking up the adulation, and it seems clear that he isn't so inclined—look at the way he cringes away in his seat, and more to the point, look at his face:
Before he's accosted, his sprite and model match—he is probably genuinely pleased! But afterwards, though the sprite is sad, the model looks angry. Akechi can't confront his fans and ask them to leave him in peace. He can't dare to be angry with them, even though he's spitting tacks. He is chained—he can only ever do what people expect "Goro Akechi" to do.
Not just as a celebrity, but in every sphere of his life, even when he's carping to Sae or showing off for Shido, he is a slave to his public image—to the expectations others have of him. He cannot act outside that box. Society put Akechi in chains from babyhood—and his response was to own them, to build a bigger, better cell for himself. That he understands—he tells us how it works repeatedly!—and that he recognises, but can never escape.
So what is it that Akechi learns about Ren, in rank 3? It's that if you dare put Ren Amamiya in a cell, he'll tear it down.
Akechi could only dream of acting the way Ren does in this moment. Ren takes a huge risk here—on how Akechi will react, on how the crowd will react—and it pays off. Rather than submitting to the chains others place on him, Ren refuses to be bound. Ren is ungovernable.
Of course that's catnip to Akechi. Of course, even though it unnerves him, he wants more. He's drawn to Ren like a moth to flame—and this is the genesis of the bitter envy that will become so toxic by rank 8.
revision history
Click here for the latest version.
v1.1 (2024/10/06)—clarified some pronouns.
v1.0 (2024/10/06)—first posted.
#persona 5#p5 meta#shuake#goro akechi#ren amamiya#ALSO OF COURSE#this is akechi's first indication of how far ren will go *for his friends*#something else that will be so significant to him by rank 7
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so like, do you ever think about the similarities between Gwaine and Will (from Ealdor)? And their respective friendship with Merlin? Because, dude, I’ve been thinking about it all week.
These two would've been friends, I'm sure of it.
Gwaine makes the most iconic character introduction of the series, gets stabbed, continues to be a menace, and then he and Merlin bond over their fathers, and lack thereof.
Gwaine is cynical about nobility, especially Kings. As we know, his father was a knight who died in battle in Carleon’s name, and the King repaid his family with nothing.
Then you’ve got Will. Will - the most iconic man from Ealdor, which is a tall order when your mate’s Merlin, Mr “Greatest Sorcerer To Have Ever Walked The Earth” who is also from Ealdor. He greets Merlin like “your kind ain’t welcome here….. lol jk bring it in”, and then immediately squares up with Arthur, who’s kind - as far as Will is concerned - is definitely not welcome here.
Merlin reveals that Will’s issues with Arthur run deeper than how they first appear. Will, too, had a father that died in battle in service to, most likely, a King. The majority of it is inferred to the audience and we’re encouraged to make our own conclusions.
It’s very likely that Will and Gwaine share very similar backgrounds. I’m not sure that Will’s father was a knight, it’s more probable that he was a soldier of some kind and not of noble birth. Regardless of whatever rank he held, there’s overlap: a father was in service to a king, died in service to that king, that king left the family with nothing as thanks, and the son is left a cynic with no trust for people with fancy titles.
Another parallel is that in both 1x10 and 3x04, Will and Gwaine leave. For different reasons, of course. Will leaves because he refuses to fight for Arthur, a noble, and Gwaine leaves because he stood up to “nobles” bullying Merlin and was banished by Uther for it.
And then they both come back, to Merlin’s delight. Will comes back, risking his life, because it’s not about fighting for Arthur; it’s about fighting for Ealdor, his village, and to fight beside Merlin. Gwaine comes back, risking the consequences of his banishment, because he knew Arthur was in danger and Merlin likely would need some help.
But like, do you think Merlin, after Will’s death and since meeting Gwaine, sees these similarities between his two friends? Not just in experiences but personality? We only got one episode with Will, and we met him during a really desperate time, so the guy was probably stressed to the roots of his hair; and it was also after Merlin returned after moving away. So, Will - though happy to see him - was still cross after feeling abandoned. We didn’t get to see more of Will’s personality outside of that, but we know he was fiercely loyal, cynical, considered people’s lives worth more than material wealth or glory, outspoken and unafraid to tell a prince to fuck off, and one for banter (i.e. how he welcomed Merlin home).
Do you think Merlin saw Gwaine’s joking nature, his fierce loyalty, his criticisms of nobility and how he considered titles unimportant compared to who a person was on the inside, and thought of Will?
And, what if Merlin, late at night and lying in bed, thought that - if they’d ever gotten the chance to meet - Gwaine and Will would’ve been good friends.
…. anyway, that’s what’s plagued me for 6 days.
#idk anyway have this *yeet*#bbc merlin#merlin#merlin meta#meta#will of ealdor#gwaine#sir gwaine#bbc gwaine#ren rambles#scheduled
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pet peeve
#vdtwof meta#not art#willing to give early ren stuff a pass because 1450s are technically medieval#but man I find this annoying#its so hard to find good references online quickly
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I'm obsessed with how Shivers will outright tell you that the anodic music kids will fail. I think this implies that, even if you build up the club, nobody will ever visit it.
I think this was one of the times in Disco Elysium that I really... got it. After reading this, I decided to tell the kids to scram. They wouldn't succeed anyways. It felt terrible. I reloaded my save; I couldn't stand to do anything else. Just because hope, beauty, or love are temporary, does that make them any less valuable? Just because you know something will be snuffed out doesn't mean you shouldn't try. That hope and love is valuable for its own sake.
At the time, I was going through a severe depressive episode. I was moving out in six months before moving cross country, so why should I bother investing into my environment? I had this old fish tank I'd poured effort into, once. Got some new fancy aquasoil that would be great for my plants, but it needed time sitting underwater. I left it like that for… oh, months. This damaged, empty, sad little thing that I had once loved immensely.
But building that nightclub with those kids made me change my behavior. I got myself a $6 betta fish, shoplifted some plants from petco, and built my tank up again. Even knowing I'd need to break it apart. So what if it ends? So what if the dance club never becomes popular? You build something and dance with your community, even if your dream fails. Even if it ends. There was love there.
And I think that's one of the things Disco Elysium is about. The kids and their nightclub is a microcosm of the knowledge that the pale is enroaching on Insulinde and the rest of the world. There is a literal, tiny, hole in the world inside of that church. The hole is another reminder of entropy, of the End. And all of this takes place in an edifice of a centuries-old regime and a religion of maintaining the status quo. A religion of broken glass and broken promises. But you take those shards and build on top of them, transforming their meaning. You grow, you build, instead of apathetically letting things remain the same. You find hope and beauty and love even though you know it's unsustainable.
Because the 'now' is valuable in itself. And I love that about this game.
#disco elysium#disco elysium meta#shivers#acele#also pls rb if u like this teehee#ren meta#ren rambles
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Something a lot of people mistakenly believe is that Akechi enjoys the work he does for Shido and that he takes the orders to kill without any resentment or regret. These text messages shed some light on the way he thinks and show that this is not actually the case. Unfortunately, these texts are entirely missable if you finish the treasure route to Sae's Palace too early. As a result, this crucial characterization is often overlooked and people take what they know about characters like Persona 4's culprit and Persona 3's traitor and assume that Akechi is playing it straight.
But even without these obscure texts, it's not like the game is subtle about this. Akechi's lack of freedom and agency is a recurring aspect of his character that people will often cast aside because it's much easier to boil him down to "crazy serial killer" than actually look at the complexity of his situation and his own victimhood.
Throughout his Royal confidant, Akechi's perfectly crafted mask cracks several times. Moments like this show him offering an out, even if he's MUCH happier if you don't consider it.
He doesn't WANT Joker to change. As much as he claims to hate Joker, he admires his convictions. Wishes he had what Joker had. Wishes he could have been more like him. See: the Gun About rank up where he mentions how he used to want to be a hero of justice.
The creepy smiles and shit you see on 11/20 and in parts of the engine room are another mask Akechi wears. Akechi ALWAYS swaps out his masks to best serve his situation. Yet he still tells Shido not to kill the thieves, that Morgana is just a cat, and is perfectly content to leave them alone, and after his fight in the engine room, when the mask literally breaks...
We see his regrets on full display. He isn't proud. He's done making excuses. All those little times the mask broke in the Royal confidant were ways to set up this moment. He genuinely cares SO much about Joker, but that caring was dangerous to his objectives, so he HAD to hate him. He HAD to want to kill him to achieve his objective, and yet...
He still cares. He's putting out spikes in third sem, no doubt because he suspects his own fate should they destroy Maruki's world, but...
#goro akechi#persona#persona 5#p5#p5r#p5 joker#ren amamiya#akira kurusu#character analysis#meta#akechi goro#p5 akechi#p5r spoilers#persona 5 spoilers
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Shen Yuan's Transmigration was not the Qi Deviation that Made the Peak Lords Suspicious
This is something I'm been thinking on for awhile with my slow re-read of SVSSS, and is sort of a big deal because of just how pervasive this bit of fanon is— and to be clear, it is fanon that the Peak Lords suspected something happened to Shen Qingqiu during the fever that happened when Shen Yuan transmigrated. I know, sounds crazy, but it's true.
Okay, first some establishing stuff. Who was the peak lord who Shen Yuan woke up to after his transmigration? Yue Qingyuan. Mu Qingfang was never there. Who did Shen Qingqiu interact with between his transmigration and when he went into seclusion? His disciples, Yue Qingyuan, and the cast of the Skinner Demon arc.
Notably, he doesn't interact with a single other peak lord other than Yue Qingyuan. He doesn't even interact with Shang Qinghua, who could have handled the logistics of the Skinner demon mission. Ming Fan was the one who arranged all of the transportation.
After the Skinner demon arc, Shen Qingqiu loses the OOC lock. He interacts with mainly Luo Binghe and, again, Yue Qingyuan as he asks to enter seclusion. His disciples and Yue Qingyuan are the only ones who could possibly tell that something happened to change his personality, and only his disciples (and especially Luo Binghe) interact long enough to tell that he's acting differently.
During seclusion, Shen Qingqiu saves Liu Qingge's life and tries to make nice. This is an extreme shift from Shen Jiu, who never would have tried to make amends in this way. At this point, Liu Qingge is the only peak lord to be tipped off that something is different about Shen Qingqiu.
The demon invasion happens. Shen Qingqiu is afflicted by Without a Cure. When he wakes up, he has his first meeting with Mu Qingfang, and all of the rest of the peak lords over the next few days. This is the only opportunity so far that any of the peak lords other than Yue Qingyuan and Liu Qingge have to notice his personality shift.
The qi deviation Mu Qingfang posits could be the reason for his personality change? Would've happened during his stay in Ling Xi caves. The demonic possession Shang Qinghua brings up and Wei Qingwei says he disproved with Hong Jing? It could've happened during the demon invasion. A demonic possession of a sort did happen, to Luo Binghe, who is now host to a certain dream demon. So they were right for checking, it was just the wrong person to check.
It's only after the invasion, after they have a chance to meet the new Shen Qingqiu, that they see this difference in personality. They have no reason to believe that his transmigration was when the shift happened.
#svsss#svsss meta#shen qingqiu#yue qingyuan#luo binghe#scum villian self saving system#ren zha fanpai zijiu xitong#scum villain#liu qingge#mu qingfang
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Fruits Basket and the temptation to individualize systemic abuse
I certainly wouldn't be the first or last person to think about this, but one thing that I think happens open with Fruits Basket -- or any other piece of media that focuses on generational trauma/systemic abuse -- is that it becomes really easy to focus on an individual perpetrator and to desire for that person to atone for their harm -- in this case, that would be Akito Sohma -- while failing to consider reparations for an abusive system in totality (the Sohma estate and the generations that came before the current zodiac spirits).
And, of course, by focusing so much on the former as opposed to the latter, we often forget that individual perpetrators of abuse are often themselves victims in the system as a whole. NOTE: this does not mean that individuals don't deserve to be held accountable, merely that in the focus on individual accountability, a lot gets left on the table and a lot of nuance gets lost in the shuffle.
The tendency to individualize when it comes to harm is understandable given what we know about human nature; it's much easier to wrap our brains around the concrete in the form of a single emotionally or physically abusive person, rather than to think of an entire system that enables abusive power dynamics to flourish over long periods of time. The latter is so weighty, and if we're talking about pragmatism, reparations offered from a single person are much easier to conceptualize than reparations from the many people who uphold a corrupt system (who are usually indoctrinated from birth to do so).
Spoilers ahead!
We get the sense fairly early on in the manga/anime that the Sohma family is a very powerful one in Japan. As we get further and further into the story, Tohru learns that various people on the "inside" have been responsible for keeping the secret of the zodiac curse (and for allowing the current zodiac spirits to believe that their fate is inevitable). The curse is truly a shackle, and by the point the story begins, it's clear that all of the current spirits -- perhaps with the exception of Shigure who even admits that the curse doesn't really affect him -- feel the heavy weight of its binding.
We learn that Hatori is the only current zodiac member to possess memory suppression, but it's also true that his father once had this ability, and that it was on behalf of Akito and his father that Hatori learned and employed this power (suppressing Kana's memories, Yuki's friends' memories, etc). However, unless I've overlooked something, we never learn Hatori's father's name, or learn about his backstory. Similarly, there are a number of "insider" maids -- some part of the "Ren" faction, and some part of the "Akito" faction -- that we see throughout the story, but we don't know any of their names either, or their backstories. And yet, these maids are a huge part of what enables the corrupt system to flourish (and to a lesser extent, what keeps the power struggle between Ren and Akito going).
I actually find it a little astounding how little focus there is on the maids, considering that 1) they know about the curse, and 2) they are not part of the zodiac, which means they could theoretically defy Akito without enduring emotional or physical turmoil (unlike the zodiac spirits themselves). And honestly, it would have been entirely plausible for them -- at least, in the most practical sense -- to defy her, as we know that Akito is rather frail. Sure, we see her be physically violent at many times throughout the story, but it's a little silly to think that she would be able to hold her own against one or more of them if they teamed up together.
A question that I find myself returning to again and again is: what incentive do the maids have to uphold the corrupt system they are part of?
Does it truly come down to their being raised with a certain set of values, and a disposition to not go against the status quo? Given what we know about Akito, it's not as if we're led to believe that she treats any of them particularly well. So does their loyalty to the idea of the curse come down to having a proximity to power? Even power in the form of a person who is clearly very fickle, prone to tantrums, and generally speaking, emotionally unwell due to severe loneliness and fears of abandonment (note: this description could apply to both Ren and Akito)? Is the prospect of being a mouthpiece for the head(s) of the family really so appealing?
I obviously don't have answers to these questions, but they still inform my thoughts around how dangerous it is to think of Akito as the lynchpin of everything, particularly when it's clear that she has been so incredibly damaged by the family, both in terms of being told that she is "special" from such a young age -- thereby basically ensuring that she has a life of loneliness due to her being put on a pedestal -- and by way of the more obvious point in being raised as a male, counter to her own desires.
Honestly, the first time that I saw the below manga panel, I broke down.
I think it was my first time truly seeing Akito as the scared little girl that she really is...I mean look at her face. She looks like a wailing baby, so utterly helpless.
She is a victim of toxic abuse, and don't get me wrong: she absolutely perpetrated horrific emotional and physical abuse that she deserves to be accountable for.
But, I really wish we had seen more follow-up to the point of reparations...and not only for the individual zodiac spirits. Perhaps this starts with some decent therapy...and to that point, how would that even work? Wouldn't most therapists just generally not believe in a zodiac curse in the first place? -- but some acknowledgment that all of them, even Akito, were caught up in a world that stripped them of their own agency all due to indoctrination that began long before any of them were even born.
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I have a book recommendation for Ren.
Well actually its a song rec - Copycat by Gumi. I think he'd itentify with it a lot.....
⌞♥⌝ He would!! I'm not sure if you've seen [REDACTED]'s Spotify playlist, but he does listen to a few Vocaloid songs lol
#💌 — answered.#💖 — 14 days with queue.#💖 — about ren.#drowningactually#IN CIRCUS-P WE TRUST 🤝#[REDACTED] probably listened to iNSaNiTY on repeat when he was younger#I'd say he'd make his own vocaloid OC/UTAU but that'd be too meta (for those who know how 2017 Ren came about lmao)
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Foreshadowing and symbolism in Persona 5 Royal - Maruki and the cat

Maruki's Confidant Rank 4
Maruki: I spotted a kitten that had gotten itself stuck up in a tree. I tried rescuing it since I felt bad for it, but I ended up with the clawing of a lifetime for the effort. I had no idea a cat's claws were so sharp...
Joker: Talk about a reward.
Maruki: Ahaha, that's true. But I was able to rescue the kitten, so all's well that ends well.
The kitten represents the phantom thieves, who didn't want to be saved from the situations they were stuck in. This is where Maruki reveals to the player that he is resolved to rescue others, even if they don't want to be saved — even if they fight him over it.

The Thieves Den Conversation
Maruki: The other day, I saved a cat from a tall tree. I hadn't climbed like that in quite a while.
Sumire: You did? That's so sweet, Dr. Maruki!
Maruki: The thing is, even though I was trying to help, the cat lashed out at me with its claws... And then I fell right out of the tree. It was a bit of a disaster.
Sumire: O-Oh... That does sound rough...
Akechi: You're so naïve. Trying to be a good person only gets you taken advantage of. You'd be a perfect target for scammers.
This time, Maruki says that he fell out of the tree and it was a disaster. This conversation can only be seen after you've completed Maruki's confidant and have unlocked the third semester. Maruki falling out of the tree foreshadows the end of Maruki's boss fight — both end with Maruki falling, unable to save those who had resisted him.
Sumire and Akechi's reactions to the cat story also resemble their feelings in the third semester. Sumire is sympathetic towards Maruki, and Akechi mocks Maruki for trying to save a cat who wants to be left alone.
#persona 5 royal#persona 5#p5#p5r#goro akechi#akira kurusu#ren amamiya#kasumi yoshizawa#sumire yoshizawa#takuto maruki#phantom thieves#my post#meta#persona 5 meta#meta analysis#persona 5 text posts
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