#reminder to future me

[sailor-cerise]

the difference between doing chores or errands on a good day vs a bad day is stunning.

Sometimes on days that are ok physically but bad mentally, I forgot how starkly different it can be.

I start to believe that I'm lazy or not trying hard enough or that I cut myself too much slack or make too many excuses or feel too sorry for myself and really I just need to do better.

And then I have a rare day like today where I am able to easily start and focus on an important, tedious paperwork-related task for two hours, getting it done, and not feel awful afterwards. The amount of willpower it takes is laughably small in comparison to most days.

No crying or bursts of anger or overwhelming exhaustion or inchoate anxiety.

Instead: a moderate sense of satisfaction, and pleasant relief that I'm done.

I feel like a different person. I know it won't last, but even that realization doesn't feel that bad. Because things are pretty good right now.

And I remember:

It's not supposed to be so hard all the time.

That I'm NOT exaggerating or imagining just how ridiculously fucking hard it is to do every-day things.

This is what it should feel like.

~* It's not supposed to feel like the world is ending because I need to open my mail. *~

What did I do differently to make today happen?

I let myself rest. For as long as I needed. For weeks.

I stopped pushing myself so fucking hard all the time, and protected my body and respected my limits and let things go.

It doesn't always give me a magic day. My exchange rate is like, 2 weeks of aggressively resting and setting boundaries for 1-2 days of doing what I want and need.

But it reminds me that pushing through is not the way to get what I want.

Maybe taking care of myself and being kind to myself will get me that day or afternoon or hour of magic, maybe it won't -- but running myself into the ground never does.

[yeetbean]

why do i feel like everything sucks ass

[jagalart]

Yarrow and Feverfew

Art trade with the incredible @liscepu, I'm so grateful for the chance! Thank you for fueling my love for the game again <3

[qifreyplushie]

you, are god. my god.

happy birthday prince of xianle, xie lian. 🌸👑

[dangans-ur-ronpas]

happy pride month

[mushrooms-and-blooms]

I have this thought, that when they exchange bonding earrings (because obviously), sif would repeatedly check it in passing reflections for weeks

special thanks to @steamed-tets for helping me with the earring design!!!!

[lnmei]

Palestinian Fundraiser Donation Match! 🕊️🇵🇸

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[ayushipop]

the violence in bottoms (2023) is so satisfying in a way i don't really know how to put into words. somewhere between the violence against women that movies sometimes shy away from too much but also Lean Into a little too much (spectrum of either not depicting realistic violence/harassment due to discomfort with it or the "you can't hit her she's a girl!" concept vs gratuitous sensationalized violence). like it's that "boys will be boys" kind of roughhousing that girls are excluded from if the narrative frames them as too delicate / feminine / untouchable. and i see them beating the shit out of each other and it feels Good. they're not untouchable dolls nor are they objects to project malice and gratuitous violence onto! it's not even fully about the empowerment or seeing girls be able to fight back (which does feel amazing in its own right and the movie does a great job of delivering it) like even seeing like, idk black widow beat up a bunch of guys in a marvel movie doesn't feel the same as how bottoms does it. it feels unpolished and grounded and realistic and satisfying. #girlswillbegirls

[swedenis-h]

After a mission

[egophiliac]

Have you heard of the "Crowley is Malleus' dad" theory going around? Where Prince Levan (or whatever his name is) didn't actually die and just went out to get some milk and is now known as Dire Crowley, the silly man? The implications of that theory is absolutely hilarious when you think about it

hold on, we can figure this out, we just need LISTS

PROS THAT CROWLEY IS SECRETLY REVAAN/LEVAN/LAVERNE/WHATEVER:

unspecified fae of some kind, with similar coloring to Mal

the animal masks are apparently a Briar Valley thing

has some kind of big blackmailable secret that was alluded to in episode 4, and then as far as I know never brought up again

(unless this was just Azul bullshitting, which is extremely possible)

based on Diablo, which...maybe means something?

has canonically worn Dad Shorts

CONS:

(gestures to Crowley's entire personality)

NO LISTEN Revaan was the guy they sent off on diplomatic missions and to take care of delicate political situations, and...look, I love this dweeb, but would you trust Crowley to be in charge of negotiating your war treaties

despite my brain insisting on reading his name as "Raven", Revaan's title does imply that he was also a dragon (or super into longan berries, I'm not ruling that out)

currently unclear why Lilia "my closest friend Revaan...he is no longer with us...I used to make fun of him for being kind of a priss about eating jerky..." Vanrouge has somehow not noticed or said anything

Malleus' Aloof Anime ~Aristocrat~ vibe had to come from somewhere, and by all accounts it was NOT his mom's side of the family

???:

turns into a bird in the opening, I don't know if that means anything but it's kinda cool, I guess

all that aside, if Malleus and Yuu are any indication, then the Draconias have...questionable taste in their social choices. so anything is possible!

[j7lkx]

Man of War - Radiohead

[ricky-mortis]

Curtwen Week Day 6: Happy Ending

[doctorsiren]

thinking about ???%…but…but with adult mob :(

[thoughtfulchaos773]

Carmy doesn't realize that when he expresses his love, it inspires those around him.

Richie used to struggle with self-hatred until he went to Ever and started wearing suits and his self-love came from Carmy's love of the industry.

And Carmy's love for the culinary world inspired Marcus love for baking, whose love of the craft stays consistent because of the love he has for his mom.

How Carmy's love of the industry and having the best knives inspired Tina to be the best.

How Carmy's love to be the best in his field inspired Luca to be better.

Lastly how Carmy's deep love for MIKEY was expressed in that dish. Not the industry but the love he had for another human being inspired Sydney to be the best chef she could be.

And how her love for him will inspire him to be a better chef.

I hate this show.

[its-kinda-snowy]

“Easy.” Finally, the facade broke, and David smiled a little, sidling closer on a branch that didn’t seem like it could hold his weight. “I just thought I’d float…something by you.” The pause seemed odd, but Marty couldn’t quite put a finger on why. “And this was something that couldn’t wait until a reasonable hour?” Jesus, he sounded old. Maybe that was what time travel did to a guy. “Nope.”

A scene illustrated from the absolutely amazing Lost in Time by @batmurdock This fic is such a treat to read, I highly recommend you check it out!!

[grimfolks]

I felt like Winchester was feeling too small for Daphne, loved the island vibes but it was a little too small, always running into the same people and with not that much to do on a friday night when she's not working so I moved her over to SimLau Isles.