#reevaluates their opinion after seeing this

[hwanswerland]

230812 Instagram update

[syrupfog]

Luffy grew up with two brothers who, at first, hated him and kicked the shit out of him. Then, eventually, loved him and who expressed that love through kicking the shit out of him. 

Luffy's grown up with a low level of violence as love his whole life. 

His crew is the same, from very early on. Nami will beat on anyone (or at least any of the boys), and Zoro's been known to land a punch to the back of his head at every dumb remark he makes. 

And Sanji... his kicks are INTENSE. 

Luffy's lucky he's made of rubber.

and he laughs it all off-- because it's FUNNY. He knows his crew loves him, they're his CREW. He knows his brothers loved him, they're his BROTHERS. Luffy has always known violence as a form of love, although notably he rarely reflects that methodology onto others.

When Luffy meets Law the first time, Law watches as Luffy punches a Celestial Dragon in the face. That violence is, obviously, NOT a form of love. 

When Luffy meets Law the second time, it's when Law is saving his life, doing impossible levels of knitting him back together.

Luffy doesn't remember a lot of that bit, or the bit right after, on Amazon Lily, when the grief is at its strongest. 

But then, two years later, he sees Law again on Punk Hazard, and they form an alliance, and Luffy declares that Law is a good guy. 

No one else agrees.

But when has Luffy ever cared about other peoples' opinions? Now certainly isn't the time to start. Law gave all those pirates new legs. He saved Luffy. He's good. 

and then Law is travelling with them, aboard the Sunny. 

And he's mean and grouchy and short tempered and, again, everyone is wary of him. 

Luffy's not, of course, because that's just how Law is, but he's confused. 

Because no matter how many times Law snaps or yells or threatens to slice people apart, he's never violent. He doesn't throw punches or kick or draw his sword.

Which does make Luffy wonder if he's done something wrong, that Law doesn't feel like he can be free with Luffy, to go after him when he says something stupid. Everyone else does, is it because he's the captain? But Law's captain too, and they're in an alliance, they're equal.

But he doesn't say anything on it-- and even in Dressrosa, when Law tries to tell him the alliance is over, Luffy knows he wouldn't attack him even if he could. And it's confusing. He couldn't count the amount of times Ace landed a punch on him just for waking him up wrong.

After all that is said and done, and they land on Zou, and Luffy meets the Heart Pirates in all their glory, all twenty of them, he doesn't know if he gets more confused or less. 

The Heart Pirates LOVE their captain (as they should, Traffy is great!) and clearly would do anything for him, starting with those dorky poses they strike. And they yell at him for abandoning them, but they don't get violent with Law, and doesn't get violent with them. He sort of just... lets them yell at him and then talks over them. 

It's weird.

This isn't a thought that keeps Luffy up at night so much as it's a thought that he returns to whenever he looks at Law, reclining as his crew tries to get him to talk about what happened, or whenever Luffy's getting literally kicked out of the kitchen by Sanji.

It's a fact that Luffy puzzles on even in Wano, as Law is passively letting Luffy ruin every plan and then announcing that he planned FOR Luffy to ruin every plan. 

He doesn't hit Luffy for ruining his plan. He doesn't even elbow him in the side.

Before Luffy had seen Law with his own crew on Zou, he had thought that maybe Law didn't really like him. But after seeing Law interacting with his crew, he started to reevaluate. Law loves his crew, and although he threatens to use his Room on them (and maybe sometimes he does), that's not a violent thing. They can pop back together like Kin'emon did. 

But Luffy wonders-- what does it mean to be close with someone without feeling the freedom to get physical with them? 

He wonders this and doesn't have an answer, because that's never been his world.

And of course, what Luffy doesn't know, is that Law grew up with that violence. Had those formative years with Doflamingo, where he was taught to fight and lived with a family who was just as violent as Luffy's own. He was full of hatred and happily took it out on people.

And the only difference was Cora-- who at first was just as violent, to be fair, throwing him out a window and all that. 

But Cora who saw him as someone that could be saved, who sacrificed everything from his mission to his life, to give Law freedom of a different kind— the freedom of gentleness. The freedom that comes from being able to live for yourself. The freedom that comes from being loved enough that the one who loves you gave it all up for you. 

He gave Law everything he had, and he held him tight and told him it would all be okay.

And it wasn't, because Cora's gone, but Law took that love and internalized it, and from the very start the first thing he does is save Bepo from being hurt. 

He gathers a crew little by little and does so by giving them second chances like he was given, and gives them safety— including physical safety. Because separating himself from Doflamingo and that hatred means also separating himself from that senseless violence that comes from growing up in organized crime. 

Law's crew respects him because, despite his prickly exterior, he's stoically kind.He's using his fruit to help and to heal-- even when he gives those pirate hearts to the marines, did he kill them? Debatable. 

Law has worked hard to excise that violence from his life, and Luffy can see that even when no one else on his crew seems to notice.

And Luffy doesn't know why-- doesn't understand it-- but god it makes him smile wide when he sees Law snap at someone and knows that he can trust that Law won't hurt. 

It's like having a wild animal, capable of destruction, lay lazily at your feet.

Luffy wants that. It's an addicting feeling, to feel safe in that way. 

He loves his crew and he loves his brothers and he's made of rubber-- they couldn't hurt him, wouldn't hurt him. 

But the secret gentle kindness of Law is addicting.

[heartlilith]

LATE NIGHT SYNASTRY OBSERVATIONS

Here are some of my observations and opinions on various placements - Part 1

💗 Speaking from experience, having 8th house synastry/prominent Pluto aspects with someone makes it extremely hard to leave the relationship

💗 I definitely believe that if someone’s Venus is in your 8th house, not only do you change dramatically throughout the relationship (esp after a break up) but the planet person does too

💗 Moon in the 1st house synastry reminds me of when someone says something weird and you immediately look at your best friend and they’re looking at you hahaha it’s like mind reading - you’re super in tune with each others emotions

💗 My mom’s Gemini Mercury is in my 6th house and she stresses me tf out. She’ll say “Can you clean the house today? I need you to vacuum and mop the floors, dust, do laundry, fill the dishwasher and take the dog out”. I don’t mind doing it but why does she have to list it out like that 😫

💗 Having 7th house synastry is cool like half the time. The other half is the planet person acting like hater. I do like 7th house synastry in relationships cause this happens to a lesser degree but in friendships I’ve noticed it a lot.

💗 Mars/Mercury conjunct Lilith in synastry likes dirty talk in the bedroom. Usually the Lilith person is the one to talk dirty and it drives Mars/Mercury person crazy but I can see it going both ways.

💗 Harsh Pluto aspects in synastry is not for the weak. Control, anger, obsession, and power struggles have a good chance of sneaking up on you whether it’s you or your partner taking on dark Plutonian traits.

💗 If you have 12th house synastry with someone that’s platonic, reevaluate your friendship and make sure they’re actually acting like a friend. 12th house synastry with friends can be shadyyyyy (12th house = hidden enemies, smoky mirrors)

💗 Having 1st, 5th, and 9th house synastry with friends is a helluva good time - you have lots of fun together and create the best memories

💗 Ascendant aspecting Saturn in synastry can create boredom in relationships. Not bored of each other, bored cause you guys never go out or do much.

💗 ^ I feel like this one can be easily overridden. Like if you have harmonious Jupiter aspects or well placed Mars signs then that would take over but sometimes you do experience the boredom and it sucks

💗 10th house synastry - power couple 🔥

💗 Heavy water house overlays indicate karmic relationships, earth overlays indicates learning lessons in relationships, heavy fire house overlays indicates intense and fast paced relationships and water house overlay indicates a deep and transformative relationship

💗 Love at first sight in astrology has to be a mix of 1st, 8th (sometimes), and 12th house synastry mixed with Pluto, Mars, and Venus aspects. Lust at first sight too.

MASTERLIST

[markrosewater]

Hi mark. It’s me, the guy that was complaining about orphans of the wheat. I wanted to start by apologizing for using the word lazy. I wasn’t trying to say that the people who make this game don’t put a ton of thought and effort and care into it, but I totally get how my wording made it sound like I was trying to say that. I’m genuinely sorry I came off like I was belittling the immense work you all do.

I also want to clarify that I wasn’t trying to say “I don’t like this thing therefore it is bad”. Millions of people play magic, all with very different tastes, and I’m just one weirdo. Everybody is going to have aspects of the game they like and aspects they dislike, my opinion is not objectively correct.

What I was originally trying to get at was that it feels as though a lot of designs that are “based on” something feel like they are getting more overt. Bonny Pall is the example my brain always goes back to because the name is almost the exact same thing as what it’s flavored after, Paul Bunyan. Orphans of the wheat is just a more recent example of this and what sparked me sending my initial message.

A few years ago, I saw a video on YouTube of a speech you made, I think it was your 30 years 30 lessons one. In it you talk about how akroan horse was originally Akroan Lion, and players didn’t get it, but when you changed it to akroan horse, suddenly people loved it and it felt so flavorful. I get that it’s important to make sure that people get the reference when you’re making one. And I get that it’s a delicate balance. Too subtle, and people don’t get it; but too overt, and bozos like me send giant messages complaining.

My qualm with Children of the wheat is that it is an example of a pattern I feel like I’m seeing where you are erring on the side of “gotta make sure they get it”, to the point that sometimes it feels like the reference is being beaten over our head. But I do recognize how that’s just my perspective and other people have different opinions on where the line is for “too obvious”. For example, I think Altanak and say its name are awesome. I like how the art is someone looking in a mirror and if you say its name three times then you summon the big bad monster. But I totally get how someone else might see that and say “well all they did was make Bloody Mary a bug”. And I also totally get how there might be another person who didn’t even get the reference and would’ve needed a card called “mutilated Miranda” to realize it.

This whole *thing* is just my way of saying that designs that are references to something feel like they are more and more often mutilated Miranda or Bonny Pall or orphans of the wheat, and that fewer and fewer of them are getting even one step removed from what they are referencing.

Thanks for taking the time to write back. It means a lot to me. How close we get to references is something we’re constantly reevaluating. We’ve definitely got the note that this year indexes too high on the obvious references.

[osokasstuff]

i think about a lot of overlaps between fatphobia and intersexism, look:

normal variations of anatomy and physiology are claimed inherently bad and disordered. (fatness is a normal variation of body type, intersex variations are normal variations of sex characteristics, but both are claimed not normal).

fear mongering and pulling "risks" out of the ass. if a person is fat, they get 100500 "health concerns" from everyone and may be medically labeled as unhealthy just because of weight. fatness is equated to being unhealthy without taking anything else in account. even if a person is perfectly healthy, their fatness is treated like it's health problem (or a step to future health problems). same for intersex variations: every single intersex variation is treated like a health problem, despite how it actually affects the person. and every try to confront these beliefs is faced with hostility and "BUT WHAT ABOUT THIS SPECIFIC CASE WHERE IT'S A PROBLEM???? SEE??? SEE?? I'M RIGHT! IT'S BAD!" fuck, yes, sometimes it is a problem. but even in those cases, it doesn't work like society wants: the problem lies not in normal body diversity but in a specific condition that causes specific discomfort or risk. for example, some intersex variations cause inability to urinate. and the problem here is the inability to urinate and not ambiguous sex traits. (so you need to address this specific problem and not mutilate a person's body to fit in social expectations).

the discrimination is protected by biased science. bigots refer to biased scientific sources to justify their bigotry. authors of these sources refuse to admit their prejudices and change their opinions even when new information is provided because they don't want to be fucking scientists and reevaluate their opinions after new data appear. they'd better protect their image of the world and use every existing logical fallacy and shitty argument to justify their outdated sources. so, medical and scientific fields are extremely biased on these topics.

unnecessary, unsafe, and actually harmful methods of "treatment" are pushed on people, often without their consent. it is closely related to the previous point (about biased science). all potential risks are either ignored and denied or "justified" by fear mongering around not intervening.

there definitely are more, but all other points i can come up with are more universal for different discriminations.

no conclusions except society really likes to police people's bodies.

[heliianth]

extremely bewildering to me that people think silva is like. a good dad. obviously due to the talk he and killua have about never betraying friends. and its like... people see that scene in isolation and think "wow killuas dad is such a gigachad" and never reevaluate this opinion based on information we get later

like almost immediately after silva freeing killua from the family dungeon we see him do a sinister laugh about how one day killua will return because, essentially, he knows him better than he knows himself. and then later we find out that silva was totally aware that killua was being magically brainwashed to abandon his friends in moments of mortal peril. all with the usual zoldyck family backdrop of brutal dehumanization and torture

and its like.... did you not catch any of that? am i going crazy? because silva is so deliberately using kikyos obsession with killua to play good cop/bad cop and weaponize his compassion so that when illumis needle eventually causes him to leave gon to die killua will feel so ashamed not only for doing that at all but also for breaking the promise he made to his dad whom he loves. and that broken promise will make him return, spirit broken, for atonement in the way killua has done many times on a smaller scale. but sure. i guess silva giving killua permission to leave his own house is a gigachad move

[asbestos-boy-68]

we need to talk about how yall are treating mephone after ii15.

some of you clearly don’t understand his character and it’s driving me INSANE.

“i hate mephone after ii15!! he’s a heartless monster!!! he doesn’t care about anyone!!!”

so. did we watch the same show orrrr..?

because one of the BIGGEST, most IMPORTANT parts of mephone’s character is that he SUPPRESSES EVERYTHING and AVOIDS HIS PROBLEMS AT ALL COSTS.

it’s almost like there was a whole episode dedicated to mephone’s repressed trauma! it’s almost like the second half of iii literally spelt this out for us! did yall just not watch the show orrrrr?

“but what about him just not caring when mepad quit the show!??!!?!” reread what i just wrote real quick.

mephone AVOIDS HIS PROBLEMS.

if anything, the fact that he didn’t even dwell on mepad quitting for a SECOND just tells us that this hurt him DEEPLY. he couldn’t even stand to process it for even a second without losing it, he had to move right on to be able to avoid the problem. that’s what he does. he avoids and deflects and suppresses.

not to mention that it’s canon that mephone DOES care about the contestants and others on the show, he just has a hard time expressing it.

this screenshot is taken directly from fan’s blog, in a post where he interviews mephone. mephone cares about everyone. he’s mean to everyone because he cares about them and it’s easier for him to express that by being an asshole than to be honest and vulnerable.

mephone doesn’t want to appear weak or vulnerable.

he wants to appear as some well put together, mentally sound, confident, host. he’s not. anyone who’s actually looked at his character will see this SO obviously, the way he acts most of the time is a FRONT.

yeah, sure, mephone has done some shitty things, but a LOT of people in ii have and i don’t see yall saying you hate them as much as i see people hating on mephone. im sick of it tbh

you guys just don’t understand mephone’s character and i think you need to reevaluate your opinion on him. mephone is a very emotional person. he just suppresses those emotions and avoids them at all costs and replaces them with assholery.

thanks for reading

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

Unpopular opinion about the Waleses:

I think that there's more going on with Kate than the cancer. I think that between this and all the attacks she's received, not only recently but for the past few years as well (out of everyone in the family, she's the one who's been the most attacked: H&M supporters constantly go after her looks, her marriage, her family, her kids, accusing her of racism, of bullying H&M out of the family), I think she might be mentally exhausted and needed a break from everything, including her royal duties. I get the criticism that she's received, saying that regular people don't have the luxury to stop working but I feel like there's also a case of mental exhaustion

Also, as someone who has deal with people with cancer and has been a caregiver, having cancer is one of these diseases that will make you reevaluate your life, think about what you want and what makes me happy. I don't know how Kate is doing but she's well enough to take the kids to a festival and go to Wimbledon.

As someone who has watched Kate grow since she started dating William to now, she never struck me as someone who is a social climber or desperate to be Queen, like so many people believe. She and William were in the same circle. She could've easily done a Pippa, married a rich aristocrat and lived a rich life without being in the public eye.

And even after she and William got married, she always gave me the vibes of someone who loves being a stay-at-home mum, living peacefully in the countryside. I never thought her (or William for that matter) really liked royal life. Look at how many years it took for them to start solo projects and even then, it looks like they're not really that involved (Heads Together is the perfect example)

Maybe, this health crisis and her finally taking the time to reflect on everything is making her realise that she doesn't really like this life, which is why she hasn't come back to doing engagements, unlike Charles (I know he's the monarch but he's always been very hard-working)

Could be. I know a lot of others that share your opinion.

Something I think is worthwhile to remember is that we’re in the middle of a huge paradigm shift as to what royalty is, what they do, and what they mean, moving from traditional monarchy (best embodied globally by the BRF and Queen Elizabeth) to modern monarchy (which no one really knows what that looks like because we all look to the BRF for that model, despite dozens of other monarchies around the world who have been able to make that transition somewhat successfully). Charles certainly has ideas of what modern monarchy can be, but he’s also a product of traditional monarchy and is still somewhat beholden to those ideals, though his own diagnosis seems to have made him realize there is some merit to a modern, scaled back approach.

To which I think is the “between a rock and a hard place” that William and Kate are in - as the face of “modern monarchy,” they’ve had to do a lot of work figuring out what that looks like, and what they seemed to have settled on is quality over quantity, and their focus is quality of everything - quality of life, quality of work, quality of health, quality of engagement. And I think we’re seeing that in their joint decision to let Kate have the time and space she needs to heal not just physically but mentally as well.

Which is an uncomfortable notion because we’re used to a royalty that “has to be seen to be believed.”

The flip side of your argument about Heads Together and how uninvolved they are today is “well, that’s totally the point.” It goes back to William’s approach to charity work; he wants to train, teach, help the locals to do this work. He gives them the seed money or the initial support to launch, but then he backs out of it, turning the reigns over to the locals or the experts, which has a far greater chance of long-term success because then you’re addressing systemic challenges. (Which is the opposite of Harry’s approach, which is that it needs to be fixed right now, so flood the system with everything and everyone you need to eradicate the immediate problem, take credit for that, then take your money and experts somewhere else and leave the locals unable to do anything except watch the problem redevelop or worsen, because you haven’t taught them what to do. The brothers have butted heads over this and it’s something often discussed by the Royal rota in their books.) So again, it’s a conscious choice by William to prioritize quality over quantity; making sure to invest in the people involved in his initiatives to address issues at the core root.

But at the end of the day, there is no right or wrong answer at what’s going on. It’s just change. And change is uncomfortable because it makes “what we’re used to” different. But it doesn’t necessarily mean that change and different is bad. We just don’t know. And we won’t know until William gets a chance to effect his plans.

As for Kate, she signed up to be William’s wife and accepted that the crown comes with it. She’ll show up when she needs to because that’s the woman she is; when it matters the most, she’ll be there. Yes, it matters somewhat now to a lot of people, but it’s doesn’t matter the most right now. It’ll be okay.

And if it isn’t, if things change and Kate doesn’t show up when she critically needs to, we’ll worry about it then. But for now, let’s take her at her own words that sometimes she has bad days and sometimes she has good days and when she’s having a good day, she wants to make the most of it. She had a good day this weekend and went out with her family and had a good time. Is she not allowed to do that? Are all cancer patients or all people with major health issues not allowed to enjoy their good days when they have them? Because if so, someone better let the Make A Wish Foundation, and all wish charities, know they need to shut down since sick people aren’t allowed to have fun.

[sunnyxdani]

kenlee: a 4 part analysis

Analyzing one of my favorite ships that I have very suddenly grown very hyperfixated on. Lee and Kenny are partners in crime, frenemies, a variety of things to each other based on what the player decides. Season 1 is notorious for none of your choices impacting anything because there’s only 1 ending no matter what. Yet, genuinely one of the only examples of your choices actually mattering is through Lee's relationship with Kenny. Their dynamic is given more attention and effort and detail than anything else in the game, even more than Lee and Clementines (as far as how it can differ based on how you play). There are also countless tender moments, looks, and words shared between the two that I’ve grown to interpret as more than friendly the more I’ve replayed the game. However, this analysis will break down more tangible moments throughout the game.

Part 1: What Lee and Kenny’s Dynamic is

Lee and Kenny are the classic but tragic “never got to tell them how I felt” trope. Due to many factors, their feelings for each other were something that they only had themselves to rely on and carry the burden of. This even resulted in tension in resentment towards one another. From the overwhelming apocalyptic state of the world, to Kenny having a wife and kid, to the both of them most likely not being comfortable exploring their sexuality– so many odds were stacked against them. Ultimately, they were in a predicament where they could’ve confronted their feelings for each other if they were given more time. But, the two men only knew each other for a handful of months before their separation.

While most of the obstacles that got in the two’s way were external, Lee and Kenny, Kenny in particular, also got in their own way very often. One of the main ongoing plot points within season 1 is that Kenny and Lilly both have a different way of leading and Lee is stuck in the middle. Along with this, Lee is generally put in a lot of difficult situations with Kenny, as Kenny sees him as his right hand man and takes it very personally whenever Lee disagrees with him on something. Now, what I’m about to say next is my own opinion and anyone reading is allowed to disagree but, I personally think that the version of Lee and Kenny’s relationship that’s the least accurate is the one where Lee agrees with every single one of Kenny’s actions and has Kenny as an immovable pillar of support. This is because I’ve always interpreted the most canon version of Lee to be the one who tries his best to take the moral high ground, which Kenny arguably doesn’t always do. So, as off-balanced and unhealthy as their relationship turns out when Lee sticks to these morals, I do think it’s important to what Kenny and Lee’s true and honest dynamic is— after all, they’re foils to one another.

Something that’s important to address is how much Kenny cares what Lee thinks— more specifically, what Lee thinks of Kenny. This is something that Kenny has shown time and time again to agonize over. As far as the first season goes, generally anyone could disagree with Kenny and he would feel more inclined to brush it off and carry on because he knew that, to him, he was right— except for when it comes to Lee. Whenever Lee expresses disagreement or disapproval in something that Kenny is doing, Kenny is beside himself. He rages at Lee, tries to convince him to see things his way, holds a grudge towards him, and overall gives the other man a very emotionally heated response. My belief is that Lee is someone Kenny admires and looks up to to a degree. Because of this, whenever him and Lee differ on something, it forces Kenny to self-reflect and reevaluate his own actions and values, which Kenny isn’t comfortable with doing. Furthermore, he’s also convinced himself that Lee thinks less of him as a person everytime the two don’t see eye to eye on something, which Kenny could not bear. To cope with all of this, he tries to bring himself to hate Lee instead.

So, how do Lee and his feelings play into this? The way I see it, Lee is the only person who sees the hurt behind Kenny’s actions, the good intention behind Kenny’s actions, and can understand the man even when he doesn’t agree with him— the only one besides Katjaa, of course, which isn’t for nothing. As someone who was on his way to jail for murder a day before meeting Kenny, he understands expressing anger through aggression, feeling betrayed by someone you love, making mistakes that can’t be undone, etc. better than anyone. And while he’s not proud of those things, he came out of the situation feeling as though he has no right to judge anybody, so he doesn’t dare judge Kenny. That being said, he hopes and tries to assist Kenny in working past his demons the way that Lee was able to. He sees the great traits within Kenny— his ability to lead, his passion for what he believes in, his diehard efforts to protect his family— and believes that those things are capable of defining him instead of the bad. (long story short he thinks he can fix him y’all sorry)

Part 2: How Their Interactions Mirror one of Two People in a Relationship

This next section is going to be dedicated to a variety of examples that showcase my point that Kenny and Lee’s relationship was written a lot more intimately and a lot less “bro” like than there’s any excuse for. These are all instances that fail to add up completely unless you switch the perspective from platonic to romantic.

What I believe to be the strongest example of this is when Lee finally faces the stranger in the season 1 finale. The stranger asks Lee, “Have you ever hurt somebody that you care about?” and it prompts three options for the player to choose from. The first option is his wife, and the second option is Clementine who is essentially a daughter to Lee. These options make complete sense, especially since this question is followed by the stranger sharing how he hurt and lost his children and wife. The third option, however, is Kenny. This option sticks out like a sore thumb to me because it just doesn’t really fit quite right as the placeholder “friend” option. If Kenny was Lee’s childhood friend, or even college friend, or any context where they had a long standing history with each other that started before the apocalypse, I don’t think I would’ve bat an eye to it. It’s like how if (I don’t watch the show so if this ends up making no sense forgive me) Rick gave Shane as an answer, I wouldn’t have questioned it. Lee and Kenny only knew each other for around 5 months, though. Additionally, the only things Lee did to “hurt” Kenny was by personally hurting his feelings whenever he had a differing opinion as him. The way that Lee speaks about the entire situation in hindsight just feels a lot deeper and much more nuanced than a friendship.

Additionally, when the crew are all stuck in the attic together, Lee is having a conversation with Christa and Omid where he reveals who he’d like to take care of Clementine if he didn’t make it. The options are either Christa and Omid themselves, Kenny, or to find a different family to take care of Clementine. Kenny’s always been my favorite character, so the first couple of times I played this game I chose him based solely on bias. As I got older, though, the option of Kenny once again felt out of place for me. Lee is capable of choosing between a healthy stable young adult couple with good heads on their shoulders who want to raise a kid anyway… or Kenny. It’s not an even comparison at all– unless Kenny was Lee’s partner, then asking Kenny to look after Clementine in his absence would make perfect sense.

This one has been pointed out various times by shippers, but I’m going to mention it anyway because I think The Walking Dead Game’s writers are brilliant and that very little of their dialogue can be brushed off as an ‘accident’ or ‘coincidence.’ Throughout the game, only three people refer to Kenny with the nickname ‘Ken’: Katjaa, Sarita, and Lee. Do I think TWDG writers added this with the purpose of hinting at Lee and Kenny having a romantic relationship? No. However, I do think this was done intentionally to emphasize the level of closeness between the two, and I find it interesting that they went about it by giving Lee a habit that only Kenny’s wife and Kenny’s girlfriend could share with him. In other words, it feels like these two characters were coded without the game even realizing what they were doing– not like I’m complaining.

Part 3: How They’re More to Each Other Than They Are to Their Canon Love Interests

I’ve given examples of when the story has treated Lee as though he’s equal to Katjaa and Sarita in Kenny’s eyes. However, there is also evidence of Lee being held closer to Kenny than Katjaa or Sarita– same goes for Lee, as there’s an argument to be made that he held Kenny in a deeper regard than he did Carley. I want to preface this by saying, I am not here to pit Kenny and Katjaa against each other and don’t think it’s necessary to advocate for this ship. I myself love Katjaa as a character, and I also know and believe that Kenny loved Katjaa deeply. Sarita is a different story, and I could go on my whole tangent about how she was only put in the story as a plot device to drive a wedge between Kenny and Clementine, but I won’t. I’m also a fan of Lee and Carley as a ship, and a big multishipper in general, so please do not misunderstand this as me invalidating any other pairing.

When Carley (who canonically was Lee’s hinted at or potential love interest) was shot in the face right in front of Lee, he was considerably okay. All of his energy was put into disciplining Lily, but as far as Carley’s death itself, he didn’t really give much of a reaction. He had watched so much death at the point that it seemed like he was starting to get somewhat desensitized to it. When Kenny “died”, however– because remember, he never actually saw it, but just the mere thought of Kenny dying had Lee torn up in a way we hadn’t seen throughout the entire game. He took a beat to kneel over, exclaimed and cursed to himself, and was incredibly somber from that point on. There are even dialogue options for him to get snappy at Omid and Christa about the matter right after, making it abundantly clear how sore he’s left from it.

Kenny, on the other hand, mentioned, reminisced about, or blatantly said that he missed Lee on multiple occasions. He had only really mentioned Katjaa once in season 2 (from what I can recall), and one could argue that it was out of respect for Sarita, which is fair. This brings me back to what I touched on earlier about Sarita, which is that I feel she’s a placeholder– for both the story and for Kenny. He seemed excited to be with someone again, to have someone to hold at night, and to have the void of loneliness filled more than he seemed connected to Sarita as a person (hence him saying “I won’t be left alone again” as Sarita was dying–felt like the reminder of his past trauma was what was hurting him in the moment if anything). He, in my opinion, genuinely had the most connection or a dynamic that feels the most like a relationship on paper with Lee than any other character in the game.

Part 4: What Made Their Parting so Tragic/Their ‘Confession’

Seeing the scene for yourselves is a lot easier and much more effective than me trying to explain how it went, so refresh your memory with the video linked below:

If I had to pinpoint a part of the game that felt like an admission of feelings between the two, I’d say it was the moment during their separation, which is painful enough in itself. The few words that were exchanged by them in that moment, as well as the context of Kenny sacrificing himself and Lee fighting to convince him not to, felt like they were conveying everything they were feeling but couldn’t bring themselves to say directly. Along with this, Kenny let go of his complex towards Lee in that moment. He finally stopped feeling threatened and belittled by Lee’s unwavering goodness and, in Carley’s words, took a page from his book. That’s the silver lining of this moment– Kenny finally made a decision that he wouldn’t live in regret about.

Lee, on the other hand, died thinking that Kenny was dead. My best friend pointed out how, in Lee’s final moments, he probably thought about how he’d get to see Kenny again, not knowing that Kenny was perfectly fine. That just about broke my heart. What’s even more heartbreaking, though, is what would’ve been going through Kenny’s mind if Lee had cut his arm off. He disappears with the possibility of Lee still being alive hanging over him, agonizing over not being able to find him again– especially by the time he met up with Walter, Matthew and Sarita, as he probably encountered or heard stories about people who survived bites by cutting off their limbs by then. Once he reunited with Clementine and saw that Lee wasn’t with her, he was then forced to face his death.

In conclusion, I interpret Lee and Kenny to without a doubt have feelings for each other, but I believe they never got an opportunity to act on them. Their love story ends with Lee dead, and Kenny left agonizing over what could’ve been. It’s not a happy story at all, but that’s what makes it so good… and if there are any modern AU fics of them out there please send them my way because I am in misery. Again, this is all simply my opinion and I do not care enough to argue about it, though I’d love to hear everyone’s thoughts! Even differing ones given that you’re being respectful :)

[lookingthroughmirrors]

What do you think about Percy and Nico or Pernico?

(Please no hate, I know people have a lot of opinions and this is simply mine based on my interpretation of the characters and not meant as an attack on anyone)

Hi 👋

I really like pernico, at least in some of the fanfics I’ve seen but I prefer it when they’re older and come back together. I really think the Percy and Nico friendship gets overlooked quite a bit, personally because I think a lot of people see Nico as a kid, and in comparison don’t see Percy like that.

I mean that more so when it comes to Bianca. I’ve seen different takes that it was Percy’s fault, that Percy purposely hurt Nico, that Percy doesn’t deserve to mourn Bianca.

1. I think Pernico no matter when it’s set, needs to address Bianca in some capacity, because it is such an integral part of their arc. I think for Percy there is always a guilt that he’ll have, survivor guilt or otherwise about what happened to Bianca and that should be acknowledged. It is also the first death that happens so directly in front of Percy, and his reaction shows that in comparison to later deaths in botl and tlo. Percy was used as a scapegoat in this situation for Nico’s anger at Bianca’s untimely death (and her somewhat abandonment of him but that’s a whole other thing). I think this is why I like older pernico so much, because often times they’ve dealt with or are dealing with this to some extent and I don’t see how the ship would work without first dealing with this.

2. I think the ship only works once Nico is passed the hero worship and later hatred of Percy. I think Nico has a lot of issues he needs to deal with and that he’d have to be doing that first before pernico could work. Tho I do love doomed relationship fics. I think they’d both have to reevaluate how they view one another for it to work (ie. Percy was a child put in an impossible situation, Nico was the same, the blame game was played, Nico is not one extreme or the other). Moral of the point, they need to sort their individual shit out first, and their issues between each other before a relationship could work, but I really think it would and really love the idea of them being together.

3. In some aspects I think Pernico, after going through points 1 and 2, is healthier than what I know of Solangelo or Percabeth in canon. Now this isn’t bashing but I do think both Solangelo and Percabeth are toxic in ways that aren’t as wildly addressed both in canon and fanon. The stuff with Nico’s powers always bothered me. He’s extremely powerful, and i think he kinda ends up nerfed in later books and things like Will banning him from shadow travelling for his health. One point is I think a child of Hades knows more about shadow travel and it’s affects than a child of Apollo, doctor or not. I also think that Nico had a tendency to overextend his powers in canon, which it’s shown when Percy does the same thing he’s heavily drained, nearly passes out ect. I think Percy would be able to help Nico in exercising his powers, as I think that’s the big issue really. I also think Nico as a character would be very tied to the Greek world and live more in that world than the mortal world, which despite canon I think would suit Percy. I think the whole New Rome College thing is odd, and he’s clearly going for Annabeth. Percy hated school, and I think it’s much more likely he went on to train halfbloods or worked in legion in New Rome than going to university.

(This is so much longer than I intended, sorry)

Overall, I think Percy and Nico (both in a relationship and as friends) have a lot of potential that wasn’t lived up to. There are definitely ways it could be toxic, but not more than any other ship has the potential to be if broken down (Percabeth, Piper and Jason and the fact he had no memory, Solangelo, the weirdness that is Leo and Calypso). Ultimately I think Pernico can prove to be a stronger ship than a lot of others too, because they’ve seen each other at their worst, they’ve seen each other stripped back and raw and grieving and they have seen each other in ways nobody else has. Percy knew Nico before he lost Bianca, he knew that side of Nico. Nico saw Percy through the war, through everything during the last Olympian. He saw him command the river Styx and wasn’t scared (which begs the comparison of Percabeth in Tartarus and Annabeth making Percy feel so bad about a particular power that he wouldn’t use it even when it meant he would die and ultimately had to be saved by a third party). They’ve seen each other grow and change, and that in turn changes people. I truly think once you get past the trauma that taints all their interactions, once they address and move past it, they are much better than many other ships. They seen the worst, and I think with that they’d find it much easier to be vulnerable with one another and show parts of themselves that they don’t show anyone else. I definitely like Pernico far better than Percabeth.

I honestly didn’t mean to write an entire essay on Pernico and my opinions but here we are. If you’ve read this far I hope I answered your question.

[aesethewitch]

From Notes to Grimoire

I’ve talked some about my thoughts and recommendations for taking notes for witchcraft, but what comes after that? In my method, notes are taken in a date-based, linear fashion. Subjects aren’t usually grouped together (unless you’re using separate notebooks for specific topics), and it can be tough to use rough notes like that for much more than basic study. I said in that post that I wasn’t talking about a reference document; I was just talking about writing down thoughts, ideas, spell tests, book notes, study notes, theory notes, and other assorted things as you research and learn about your craft.

So what about when you want to take your rough study notes and turn them into a nice-looking, well-organized, practical collection that’s better for regular referencing and actual use? That’s when you go from notes to grimoire.

(Note that this post is loaded with my opinions. I say it throughout, but go into this knowing that I’m speaking from my personal perspective — you won’t, and really you shouldn’t — agree with everything I say here.)

What Goes into a Grimoire?

Ultimately, what you put in your grimoire is up to you. I’m of the opinion that grimoires are and should be working documents. If you aren’t familiar with the term “working document,” it just means that the contents of the grimoire are always under construction. It means that you’re allowed to add, remove, and modify things as your practice changes over time. It also means that you’re supposed to reevaluate the grimoire’s contents every so often to make those updates. Complacency is the enemy of progress — there’s always a new question to ask or a new perspective to take. Keep the working document mentality in mind while you decide what to put in your grimoire.

With that said, in my opinion, a grimoire is not a place to take raw notes, write out theories, test spells, or even record divinations. Those things ought to go in your notebook, not your grimoire.

A grimoire is a reference document. It holds information on the spells, rituals, traditions, incantations, observances, and materials you actually use and need to look up. Grimoires are practical tools. Yes, they can look nice, but if the function isn’t there, it isn’t a grimoire — it’s just a scrapbook.

So, what should you put in a grimoire? Here’s a general idea of things I’d recommend:

Proven spells and recipes

Rituals you perform and when you perform them

Sigils, symbols, and spell vessels you’ve made and what they’re for

Instructions for making or obtaining materials for spellwork

A reference sheet for making substitutions

Holidays and events you observe and how you observe them

Divination instructions, including cartomancy spreads, magpie oracle charm lists, symbols you look for, and other relevant information

Plant, herb, stone, and crystal profiles

Fire, smoke, pet, and other safety details and instructions

Your astrological chart and its meanings

Profiles on spirits and deities you work with, including preferred offerings, important dates, descriptions of vessels, and details about any ongoing deals or agreements

Anything you commonly need to reference from books, online articles, or other sources

Conversely, here are things that should not go in a grimoire:

Notes on books you’re reading

Spells that are works in progress

Drawings of sigils in progress

Divination notes

Lists of books you want to read

Lists of topics you want to research next

Notes on spirit encounters

Journal pages

Rambles on magic theory

Information that has nothing to do with your witchcraft, spiritual path, religion, or other related field

Information you simply will not use

Obviously, you can add and remove things as you see fit. You should put whatever you commonly reference and whatever is practical for you in your grimoire. If you’re using it all the time, put it in there. If you don’t use something that “everyone” says “has” to be in your grimoire, don’t put it in. For example, I don’t use my astrological chart for anything. I know my big three, and that’s good enough for me. So, it doesn’t go in the book, no matter how many times I see it on those “what to put in your grimoire!” lists that go around witchblr every so often. Similarly, if you don’t have pets, you don’t need to put pet safety information in your book.

Use your common sense and discretion. Your grimoire is yours. If it isn’t practical, don’t put it in. If it is practical and relevant to you, but no one “recommends” putting that particular bit of information down in a grimoire, who cares? Write it down. You can always take it out later.

Creating and Maintaining a Working Document

Now, you’ll see grimoires referred to as working documents (or “living” documents) pretty frequently. You’re allowed to (and meant to) change things over time as you and your practice change.

But how do you do that? How do you keep an organized, practical reference document if it’s constantly changing?

Well, first of all, stop over-thinking it (I say to myself, frequently and loudly). Second of all, no matter what format you choose, from bound notebooks to binders to apps, the primary idea is to evaluate the contents regularly and to keep them in some kind of predetermined order. How that will look and how frequently you do reviews depends on you, your preferences, your practice, and the medium you choose. So, let’s have a look at some options and how I would suggest setting them up as a working-document-grimoire.

Binders

First (and best, in my opinion), are binders. There are a plethora of sizes and styles, so you can choose based on portability, available volume, color, and features according to your needs.

By far, the greatest benefits of using a binder for a grimoire are versatility and adaptability. You can create sections by inserting hunks of cardboard, sheets of colored paper, or pre-made pages with tabs that stick out for easy navigation. And, if you decide you don’t like the way your sections are organized, you can easily open the binder rings, take the section out, and put it wherever you want. In the same way, you can add and remove pages to any section at any point. You don’t have to allot space ahead of time or worry about running out of room in a given section.

Binders have a sort of inherent working document nature. With these, I would recommend reading through the entire thing at least twice a year to review the contents. When something sticks out as inaccurate, unused, or outdated, remove it. You can discard the page entirely or set up a separate “archive” folder to keep it in so you can look back and remember what you’ve taken out. (I keep one of these, though I’m considering moving it into a folder clipped into the back of my grimoire binder.)

On the other hand, if you find something in your grimoire that needs more attention, detail, or elaboration — or you just get inspired and want to add a new spell or bit of information to what’s already there — you can pull out the old page and replace it, or you can add a new page right after the existing one.

It’s up to you how frequently you go through your grimoire. Remember that this is a practical reference document. Set it up in a way that makes sense to you. Again, the nice thing about binders is that if you decide the way you’ve set it up is no good, you can change it without having to start over completely.

Notebooks

Obviously, there are a ton of types of notebooks out there. It comes down to pure personal preference what kind you go with.

Because notebooks can’t be rearranged in the same way that a binder can, keeping one as a working document obviously looks different. With any kind of bound notebook, I recommend doing a sort of yearly review. If much of your practice has changed, or if you find you’ve run out of room in your grimoire for new entries, it’s time to start into a new notebook. This doesn’t mean you have to disregard the original grimoire entirely.

You can copy over spells, information, and whatever else you like into the new book and shelf the original as a relic or treat the books like volumes in a series. In that way, you wouldn’t copy more than the essentials into the new grimoire; you would instead add entirely new spells, rituals, and information to it.

Either way, I would suggest dating the books. I would jot down at least the year(s) you work in the grimoire for organizational purposes. Remember that practicality and usability are the names of the game. You want to be able to use these books as references for your magical practice to help you remember things accurately.

The major drawback of any kind of notebook is that if you find you hate the way you’ve set it up, you can’t just go back and rearrange it. Once it’s down on paper, it’s down. You would either have to rip out the pages and move them manually, leaving them loose or re-pasted into their new places, or start up a new notebook entirely.

On the other hand, that has benefits, too. It removes the temptation to arrange and rearrange endlessly. If you’re indecisive and would waste too much time worrying about layout as opposed to getting a functional document up and running (even if it’s imperfect), a notebook may actually be a pretty good choice for you. It’s an exercise in tolerance for imperfection, to say the least.

Now, let’s have a brief look at different kinds of notebooks.

Divided Notebooks

First, let’s look at notebooks that come divided already. Whether it’s a subject-divided spiral notebook, a journal with built-in title pages, or journals that are divided into smaller journals inside them, part of the work has already been done for you.

A drawback of using these types of notebooks or journals is that you lose the ability to decide how much space is given to a particular subject. On the other hand, it can make getting started much, much easier. My first grimoire was in a large spiral-bound five-subject notebook. I divided it into five sections: Spells, Holidays and Seasons, Spirits, Plants, and Miscellaneous. Granted, at the time, I was taking notes into my grimoire. It wasn’t a very practical document; that wouldn’t come until several years later, when I figured out why I couldn’t remember anything with any sort of reliability. Now, I’ve got very strong opinions on note-taking and record-keeping.

It’s the chemistry nerd in me.

Blank Notebooks

This includes plain lined notebooks, unlined notebooks, and bullet journals. These are harder to use, in my opinion. I don’t think they’re very friendly to beginners who are creating their very first grimoire. These lend themselves better to note-taking notebooks than official grimoires, but you can certainly make them work.

To make a blank notebook function as a grimoire, you should spend a bit of time deciding the order of contents. How many pages do you want to dedicate to a given subject? What subjects will you place next to each other? Will information about moon phases be followed by planetary information, or will you talk about moon water and moon-based spellwork? Do you want to create sections and title pages ahead of time? To make it organized, you’ll want to decide these things somewhat in advance or leave room to add them later on. It’s easier to add (taping, gluing, paper-clipping, etc.) or remove (cutting, tearing, etc.) pages in some notebooks than others. Take that into account when you choose a notebook for your grimoire!

Sketchbooks

For the more artistically inclined magical practitioner, a sketchbook might make a good choice. If you plan on using materials like paint or watercolors, the thicker paper stock would be a solid asset. Artists will feel right at home drawing sketches, diagrams, sigils, and other illustrative details in their grimoires with a sketchbook. They have the same drawbacks as blank notebooks, being complete blank slates that you have to plan around, but they do end up being very nice to look at.

Like with blank notebooks, consider the order you want to put things in. Jot down titles, content, and ideas for drawings or art pieces you’d like to include in the final product. Remember that because the book is bound, you may not be able to add things to sections that have already been filled in. Consider artistic ways to show what’s on a given page to make it easier to manage — color-coded page edges, for example, might be an idea.

Junk Journals

I genuinely wouldn’t recommend using a junk journal for a formal grimoire. By their nature, they’re messy, disorganized, and difficult to parse through for information. They’re fun to make, don’t get me wrong — I love a junk journal for regular journaling and inspiration. But they don’t lend themselves toward organizational systems. If you’re going to use a junk journal as your formal grimoire, you’ll either have to resign yourself to hunting through pages for what you’re looking for or do some extensive planning in advance.

The best way to make a practical, working-document-style junk journal would be to combine it with a binder, I think. Create those iconic, aesthetic pages. Punch holes in them and place them into a binder in the correct location. That way, you still get the pretty aesthetic of the junk with the practicality of what a grimoire should actually be.

(Personally, I would use the junk journal aesthetic for section title pages in a binder — give it some personality and decoration without sacrificing any of the practicality.)

Digital Documents

I say that binders are the best option, but honestly, digital grimoires are up there, too. If you need to keep your magical practice more secret, if you don’t have time or energy to put together a physical book, or if you would prefer to have a system you can reorganize at the drop of a hat, digital grimoires might be right for you.

There are a ton of programs out there you can use. I’ve used Word, Scrivener, and Obsidian for grimoires and/or witchcraft note-taking, personally. Of them all, Obsidian is the one I would recommend most strongly. Word is… well, it’s Word. Scrivener is wonderful as a writer’s tool, and I use it to write these posts! I had moderate success with it for grimoire work. By far, Obsidian has been the best. The back-linking capabilities alone revolutionized the way I set up my grimoire (and other reference documents, including TTRPG notes). I really can’t recommend it enough.

Another program I’ve seen recommended frequently is Notion. While I can’t speak about it myself, since I haven’t used it, it does get rave reviews — particularly from folks who like to have a nicer aesthetic for their craft. Obsidian is pretty bare-bones aesthetic-wise, so if that’s important to you, Notion may be an option to consider.

With digital grimoires as working documents, I would follow the same guidelines as with a binder. Review the contents regularly, archive anything outdated, and evaluate the organizational layout for practicality. My biggest suggestion is to date the individual entries. Include the date you first create the page, obviously, but I would also include the date of the most recent update. If you want to get really lab-notebooky and formal about it, you could include every date you update it. (That’s what I do, personally, but I come from a database management background.)

The main downside to a digital grimoire is accessibility. If you’re out in the middle of nowhere without a computer or cell service, you may not be able to access your grimoire. I’ve seen folks set up entire grimoires using the notes app on their phones to make it easy to carry around, which is fine… unless you find it difficult to type with a phone keyboard. Physical books can be transported via bags, and they don’t need to be charged like a phone or laptop.

I also find that digital grimoires often lack the charm of a physical one. Even pretty, aesthetic templates on Notion are missing that witchy feeling. You know the one I mean — cracking open a tome of secrets to access the magic within just can’t be done through a screen.

Turning Notes into Reference Materials

This is probably the toughest part. After you decide what you want to include in your grimoire, now you’ve got to actually go through your notes and put together your collection.

The tone of your grimoire doesn’t necessarily need to be overly formal. It also doesn’t have to be publisher-ready. You aren’t writing a book on magic. You’re putting together a collection of materials that you want to be able to reference quickly and easily. It doesn’t have to make sense to anyone else or be absolutely perfect. Remember — this is a working reference document for you. If you mess it up, you can fix it later. Don’t be afraid to cross stuff out or be a little messy. So long as it stays practical and reference-able, you’re fine.

Spells and rituals are probably the easiest things to copy into a grimoire. You might even be able to copy them over verbatim from your notes, depending on how you took the notes. Bring over any changes you made to the spell, clean up the language, and make it easy to read. If you’ve scribbled on your notes, bring over any annotations that make sense. I wouldn’t copy all commentary; just the things that impact the working itself. You can include a “notes” section after the spell itself if you want to make note of your personal thoughts regarding the spell, what to expect during or after, and other information that might be found in the margins of your raw notes. Trim the excess. You don’t need your “lol this ingredient looks like a dick” joke in your grimoire, but you might want the “this ingredient can cause eye irritation, so don’t touch your face after handling” note.

If you’ve ever written an essay for school, I usually recommend a similar process. Your notebook is the basic first draft. For your grimoire, clean up the draft, fact-check yourself, jot down your sources, and then make it look nice.

“Making it look nice” could mean drawings, stickers, washi tape, pictures, and the like… or, it could mean choosing a clean font and ordering your steps numerically. If you’re hand-writing your grimoire, do your best to keep your writing legible. Always remember that these pages are intended as a reference document. If you can’t go back and read it, it’s failing in its function! That applies to overly-decorative pages, too; if your aesthetic is obscuring the information inside the grimoire to the point where you can’t parse the instructions on the page, it isn’t a grimoire anymore. There’s nothing wrong with a pretty, aesthetic inspiration book, but that’s not what we’re going for here.

My biggest piece of advice when transferring notes into a grimoire is to be practical. Not everything you learn about and jot down in your journal or notebook can (or should) make into your grimoire. If you aren’t going to use a spell, don’t include it. If you don’t go by the Wheel of the Year, don’t put those holidays down in your grimoire. Learning about things and taking in information is what the notebooks are for. Grimoires are akin to manuals.

Only take what you need from your notes. Think about what you want to incorporate and what you already use in your actual practice. You wouldn’t want to take down all of your notes about that witchcraft book you just finished, but maybe there was a spell or a correspondence table that you keep going back to look at. That’s something to put in your grimoire.

My Grimoire

I’m of the opinion that you shouldn’t share your grimoire with just anybody. Frankly, not a single person in my life has ever seen mine. I’ve shown off examples, and I’ll share my note-taking journal(s) on occasion, but you’ll never see my actual grimoire. My grimoire is for me. It isn’t for the aesthetic, and it isn’t for show. It’s a reference document that details my entire practice, from spells adapted from various sources to spirits I’m allied with to traditions that have been passed down in my family.

To no one’s surprise, I actually keep two grimoires. I’ve got my digital grimoire in Obsidian, which also doubles as a note-taking repository. I have several physical notebooks scattered around that I use in the moment, but everything gets recorded digitally for posterity and easy perusal. My Obsidian files are divided into categories which are then sub-divided into specific subjects. Raw notes, experiments, and theory crafting are kept separate from the reference sections.

And I keep a physical grimoire. I used to struggle with keeping physical grimoires. I was always unsatisfied with them, or I forgot about them, or I changed my mind about how I wanted them to be organized mid-way through and ended up frustrated. It’s why I swapped over to exclusively using digital programs — and why I landed at Obsidian in the first place.

But now, having a very good digital system in place, I find myself wanting to travel with my grimoire. I want to take it with me so that I can perform spells on the go. I’d like to take it to the cemeteries and forests I frequent to discuss its contents with those spirits and to accurately perform rituals without having to look at a blurry picture on my phone. Recently, I decided to repurpose an old binder that I once used for character creation. It’s got a pencil pouch in the front, and it isn’t too large to carry around. Plus, to the untrained eye, it just looks like a very nice student’s school binder. I could easily take it to a coffee shop to work on it and raise precisely no eyebrows.

It’s been a work in progress to decide how I want to lay it out. Writing this post and the taking notes post have been really helpful, actually. I think I’ve finally got a solid idea of what I want to put in it and how. It isn’t ready to show off, but I do think that once I have the layout settled, I’ll share more specifics about it to illustrate some of my points made here. Depending on what I decide to share, it may end up a Ko-Fi exclusive. (Just the layout/title cards would be fine to be totally public; pictures or descriptions of the actual pages would be exclusive.)

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[atmajolish]

obey me as fanfiction tropes lucifer - meet the family

you don't know why you have never met his family, just that every time the topic comes up he does his best to avoid it. at this point you think he might be the head of a mafia and simply doesn't want to involve you in the 'family business'. it's a surprise when he suddenly invites you to join a dinner with his family and when you go you realise that you got it all wrong. it's not that his family is all serious and involved in the mafia, it's that they are so chaotic it's hard to keep up. even for lucifer.

mammon - bodyguard au

being famous is only fun when your life and privacy isn't threatened by a stalker, hence why your manager decided to get you a bodyguard. you aren't quite sure how mammon is supposed to protect you, considering he seems to be easily distracted and like he hates spending time with you as he seems to think you are just like any other famous person, ready to abandon your morals the moment it suits you. but when he saves your life you're forced to reevaluate your opinion of him. maybe you can make him rethink his opinion on you as well.

leviathan - friends to lovers

you and levi have known each other since forever. you went to the same elementary school and when you saw that levi seemed to like the same cartoon you did, you just had to befriend him! several years down the line you are now in university while levi is making his main income via streaming. it feels hard to connect the same way you used to with how different your lives are these days, but you refuse to give this friendship up. the fact that you might see levi as more than a friend has nothing to do with that.

satan - coffee shop (cat café)

working as a barista in a cat café sounded like a fun way to work in theory. in practice you don't make a lot of coffee, but spend your time cleaning up after the cats. the fact that this guy keeps coming in without ordering anything and just watches the cats for at least an hour before leaving. you're sure it's against the rules, but you don't want to be the one to confront him. you don't get paid for that after all. however, he must have noticed you staring at him because he is coming over and how did you get to the point where he is telling you cat facts?

asmodeus - fake dating

you're unsure how you ended up owing a favour to mammon out of all people, but he's cashing it in right now. apparently his brother has troubles getting rid of an admirer and you're the only possible person who would agree to fake date him and keep shut about it. which is why you and asmo are now sitting in his living room deciding to come up with a way on how you fell in love. it would be so easy if your traitorous heart would just stop fluttering every time he reaches out to hold your hand in public.

beelzebub - soulmate au

sharing the taste with your soulmate sounds good in theory. of course you had to get unlucky with it as your soulmate seems to eat almost constantly and have no limits as to what exactly they eat. you've tasted multiple inedible things and at this point you're concerned for your soulmates health because there are probably repercussions for eating paper. when you see your lab partner trying to eat some of the chemicals you're working with it doesn't take you long to put two and two together. you can't even be mad for all the things you were forced to taste because beel is just cute enough to get away with it.

belphegor - roommates

you are used to your roommate falling asleep in the weirdest spots and it's a miracle he doesn't wake up with severe neck and back pain every day. however when he starts sleeping in your room because 'he likes the company' you need to start rethinking some of your feelings. when you ask him why he doesn't just sleep in his own bed, you only get a sigh and belphie tells you that it's no use sleeping there, because you aren't there. maybe belphie had already figured his feelings out long before you.

diavolo - arranged marriage

being in an arranged marriage was made out to be a lot worse than it actually was. at least in your case. you've known diavolo since you were kids and the both of you had always known it would come to this at one point. still, the thought of possibly ruling a kingdom at his side was a bit daunting. it's when he reassures you that he will handle it and plans out several shenanigans just to distract you from the pressure, that you think maybe you can fall in love with him.

barbatos - time loop

you've been forced to repeat the same day over and over again every time you die and no matter how hard you try, you just can't seem to figure out who your killer is. you're sure it's always the same person and they should be the only who is also aware of the time loop, but detective work has never been your strength. it's when a friend of a friend mentions something you said several time loops ago that cold horror washes over you. you never expected barbatos, the guy you sorta had a crush on to be your murderer.

simeon - elementary school teacher

teachers aren't supposed to have favorite students, but it's hard to not like luke just a bit more than the rest. if only because he's the one that listens to you most of the time. what you don't expect is that his dad is also exactly your type, so you really can't help but stare for a bit when simeon first walks in for the parent-teacher conference. what you also don't expect is simeon giving you his number since luke will move to a different school soon. when you ask what the number is for, he hides a smile before telling you it's his way of asking you out.

solomon - reincarnation

you don't know how often you have died and been reborn again. it's been a lot of times. the thing is, you have the easy part. the dying and the reincarnating. your lover solomon has the hard part as he is unable to die and has to live without you until your soul has come back to earth. your memories fade a little more each time you come back and you don't know how long you will be able to keep remembering him, nor how long he will keep on waiting for you.

mephistoteles - enemies to lovers

there are many things you could say about mephistoteles, however it would always be that you kinda hate him. he's stuck up, rich, and can't look past his own nose. you know he thinks about you just as badly so every single time you two see each other you only exchange glares and maybe a few insults if either of you is in a particular bad mood. it's when you're forced to work together for a project that you are forced to see him in a new light, no matter how much you hate that there is more to him than the image you have in your head.

raphael - secret agents

working with raphael has always been easy. he listens well and he can easily kill and get out without much issue. it's only problematic that he refuses to accept any help whatsoever from you, insisting it's easier if he just does it alone. normally you should be happy about that, it means less work for you, but something about it just irks you. it's when a mission goes south that the two of you finally have a heart to heart and realise that working together might be easier than it seems.

thirteen - hitman/target

there's been a hitman trailing after you for a while now. there have been too many freak accidents near you for them to be just accidents. it's when you enter your apartment and see said hitman casually lounging on your couch, eating your snacks, watching your tv. you definitely didn't think she'd be this pretty. her complaining about how you keep avoiding her traps and take out all of the fun of job, reminds you that she is sent to kill you though. it sure is a surprise when she decides to take her time and instead pose as your roommate for the time being and with every day it gets just a bit harder to distinguish whether she still wants to kill you or there is actually more to your relationship.

[supercalime]

A goodbye post I guess?

Hey yall, i wanted to write something about all of this as this may be the last time I talk about this show. Apologies in advance, this will be long and all over the place cause im using this little essay to get it off my chest and help me calm down my anxiety. Strap in, this will be a doozy.

First off, no matter how sad and disappointed we are, let’s please not stoop down to the level of those fans when it comes to voicing our issues with this situation. Please, let’s not harass, call people names, send them threats, etc. we can voice our opinions in an adult way, and although it fucking hurts and it makes us want to shout from the rooftops and call Murphy, Minear and Stark every name in the sun, we need to be grown ups and come out on top of it.

That being said, I want to first acknowledge how fun and cool yall are. We endured A LOT of shit since april and all that bullshit didn’t stop you from keeping the positivity going. I applaud you all for that. It has been hard. I came in contact and became friends with some really nice people here and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I loved being a part of this fandom and it physically hurts me that this feels like it was all for nothing.

Even though I feel like a fool as well, I hate to see how you are all so sad with this. This wasn’t our fault. We were not naive for believing that this storyline could’ve been great. Don’t blame yourself for being taken advantage of. Because that’s what they did. They saw the opportunity to profit from a community and took it. They are the ones in the wrong. They used us for brownie points and then tossed us away like trash the second they got what they wanted. It’s on them.

What I’m about to say now will sound hypocritical as I’m writing this at 2am while trying to cope with an anxiety attack caused by this very show, but what we can take away from this is that unfortunately, we can’t rely on tv shows for happiness. Yes, that’s a bitter pill to swallow, specially in this political climate as we were hoping for some sort of escape from the horrors of the elections. What i took away from this is that I need to (for lack of a better word) touch grass. I need hobbies, I need friends. All things that I’ve been lacking because fandom stuff is easier. I need to find stuff that makes me happy that doesn’t depend on outside factors. But also I want to make sure that if a show is all you have, that’s okay and is even more okay to feel betrayed. I was an absolute mess a few years ago when a show I adored stabbed their fans in the back, but it gets better. You still get angry remembering you were done dirty but I promise that the memories that stick are the positive ones.

I don’t wanna go on a deleting spree but I also don’t want to be reminded of this hurtful moment as the wound is still fresh, so I’m deciding to reevaluate some things offline, like I did with previous fandoms, and come back when I’m ready. I don’t think I’ll leave tumblr or never watch/talk about 911 again but I need some time and space from it so I can feel better. I don’t want to doom scroll through the tags like I did tonight. What Ryan Murphy, Tim Minear and Oliver Stark did to us was awful, but the best thing I can do is not let these three men influence my mental health. I won’t let a tv show ruin me because it’s not my fault. It’s not our fault to believe that there were half decent people in the entertainment industry that cares about the portrayal of queer individuals. They will have to sleep at night with that knowledge and deal with the consequences from the BoBs. And if these guys decide to humor the BoBs that’s their funeral. It would further show they never cared about representation and just wanted to save face after making so many people miserable for simply enjoying a canon ship. I hope they can see the consequences because I’m not even the target here. I’m hurt for all the queer men that saw themselves in buck and tommy, that even messaged the actors thanking them for their honest portrayal.

In conclusion, here’s my goodbye (for now).

Thank you so much bucktommy nation!

Yall are the best,

Love, Lety 🖤

[granulesofsand]

Hazbin Hotel: Valentino

🗝️🏷️ RAMCOA, perpetration

I spent a few minutes trying to gather what the controversy around Hazbin Hotel entails, and I did not succeed. So I’m going to keep talking about it, because we already watched it and anyone who hasn’t can find video essays that explain far more than the blips of relevance in the show itself.

Valentino. He is actively engaging in trafficking and exploitation of others, and whether he is causing harm is not the question. He is.

It is the manner in which casual viewers cast judgement upon him that stings. Not ‘casual’ as in watching for fun, ‘casual’ as in unaffected by the themes of the media. People who have never been at either end of organized abuse in any capacity.

It comes back to the discussion of what it means when you talk about an archetype rather than a character. Valentino is an interesting character who can be analyzed in combination with techniques such as lighting, music, and motion. Traffickers and exploitative perpetrators are not the same. Traffickers and exploiters are real.

I can tolerate people relating those identities to the character of Valentino — it raises my hackles because I have trauma, not because of the conversation is necessarily offensive.

I don’t like when people take those traits and decide that Valentino is not redeemable or doesn’t deserve redemption, because we don’t know enough about Valentino to grasp how he became the perp he is — instead, people take the base knowledge that OA hurts people and demeans all perpetrators of OA.

We are perpetrators of OA. In our external reality, we were generationally involved in a religious organization that emphasized the spiritual value of harm. We have been tortured repeatedly until our abusers created a new self who would fit the role they needed. We have been hurt this way since we came into this world as a babe, and we have hurt others since we could walk.

That is a world, several worlds, of pain. It was inflicted because it had been so for hundreds of years, and none were capable of ending the cycle. We left, we are alive, because we got very lucky several times over.

And some of those selves — none of us went away after we formed — identify with Valentino. As it stands, the alignment with abusers (beyond immediate coercion) is familiar, and those selves don’t see media reflecting them often.

We are not perpetrating currently. We are in therapy and working together to heal, but it is slow, hard work. It lessens the shame to see what happened to us happened to others, and those selves were not being bad for surviving.

A lot of the ‘evil’ traits Valentino displays are cluster B Personality Disorder traits. People with cluster B PDs often adapted that way through trauma, because that was how they survived.

Giving those selves dignity and respect despite their behavior allows them space to reevaluate whether they still need those behaviors. They have to learn to override the automatic response they relied on for years, and for us they have to do that while dodging training and torture memories designed to keep them in their place.

We are real. Survivors, multiple or singlet, are real. And the only people who get to forgive perpetration are the victims and the perpetrators.

If you were not our victim, your opinion matters far less to us. If you were neither a victim nor a perpetrator, your opinion might as well not exist. It probably shouldn’t, unless you have some lived or learned experience you’re working off.

When you generalize statements about perpetrators, you are going to hit people who were coerced, adapted to survive, or never learned better. That could be the straw that breaks the camel’s back; healing is the worst, sometimes worse than living it the first time, and there are enough barriers without tossing in a poorly thought out comment in the mix.

Valentino exists only in the media and the interpretations of those who consume it. Survivors, including perpetrators, are real. Please try to be more gentle with heavy topics.

[transingthoseformers]

OverpanKid!OP anon

Sentinel and Blackarachnia would have interesting reactions.

If Overpan figured out what happened on Aracha-7, Sentinel would be in deep slag. Thankfully, while they don't see eye to eye, Optimus doesn't want Sentinel dead, so while his parents are tearing into Ultra Magnus (not literally but the little twitches in Trepan's digits and Overlord's glare say other wise, though they can't act on it. While they are of neutral alliance and can't be prosecuted, Optimus isn't and they wouldn't put it past the Council prosecuting their son for their actions) Optimus pulls Sentinel over to the side like;

"Hey, I think we need to have a chat and bury a few hatchets before you get buried by them."

They have a long overdue conversation and who knew that the threat of your old pal's parents ripping you to shreds would be the key to healthy communication? There's still a long way to go for them but they've made up for now. Though upon learning Trepan - a mech with a very explicit reputation - was an Autobot, makes Sentinel a bit curious. He's been under the impression that their faction can do no wrong, but realizing this mech as committed atrocities that have been struck from the records, makes him wonder what else they've been hiding. (I like to believe that Sentinel genuinely believes in the Autobot cause, but he's so young and fully indoctrinated with the the wool pulled securely over his eyes, he's ignorant of the darker side of the Autobots. Trepan showing up is his glimpse behind the curtain. I don't hate Sentinel, he's a jerk and needs to learn his lesson, but I think he can be redeemed.)

Blackarachnia on the other hand, well, her mental state isn't the best, so she's probably gonna end up extremely conflicted once she learns that sweet, goody-two-shoes, Optimus is the son of two of the most terrifying mechs in the universe.

I'm sure I can figure out some way to reunite these three again. Sentinel's got a good start but Blackarachnia is gonna be tough.

Makes perfect sense, it's totally TFA Autobot of the autobots™️ to blame whatever Overlord and Trepan do currently on Optimus

Nice to see Optimus and Sentinel work something out... Even if it's under threat of two of the most terrifying mecha in the galaxy who just happen to be your friend turned rival's parents. Sentinel had to have been terrified lol

And you're right about Sentinel. He does honestly believe everything autobot wholeheartedly, especially after Archa Seven. This being a turning point in that could have interesting interesting results, especially as you put it tfa Sentinel imo too can be redeemed with careful work.

Yeahh BlackArachnia already had several reasons to be wary, but she's going to be Extra reevaluating her interactions with him after learning of his past before the academy. Though, considering their interactions in canon I think BlackArachnia is severely tempted to accept his help (at least that was the tone I saw in the show, with the whole tragedy angle— especially in the episode where she was working with meltdown and meltdown double crossed her) and considering bw BlackArachnia I feel like we'd definitely see her go through a redemption arc of her own (thought I don't see her becoming an autobot again. I've thought before about her declaring as neutral before though...) Her learning about Trepan and the worse sides of the autobots cannot help her opinions on them.

[curapicas]

I find it curious Link Click uses the twins flashback to shove on our faces right away the parallels between Cheng Xiaoshi and Li Tianchen. Both combative boys, protective of their family, somewhat naive in different ways and quite enamoured with looking cool. So yeah, there's parallels, but to be fair the writing is good enough that you can find parallels with the main duo regarding any of the new s2 characters. And I think Link Click cleverly does that so we only realize closer to the finale what is, in my opinion, the strongest parallel: Cheng Xiaoshi and Li Tianxi.

They are both "the babies" of the group. Whereas Cheng Xiaoshi has two endlessly nagging friends who often scold him and push him to do better, Li Tianxi lost both her mother and a brother capable of caring for her, thus her needs go ignored as she grows up with Qian Jin. Qiao Ling and Lu Guang work together with CXS to earn a living/pay off his debt, LTX is used by her family to carry out the shady stuff they don't really need to do (both CXS and LTX get in extremely emotional and vulnerable situations because of it).

Cheng Xiaoshi eventually grows and understands his powers as a duty, and even though LG and QL still try to shield him from the worst*, they look proud whenever he shows what he's capable of (QL even calls him cool!). LTX's one "act of rebellion" is framed as a betrayal and she's straight up murdered. In the confrontation, she even prefers hiding behind CXS, whom she met hours beforehand, exactly bc she knows what her family is capable of.

Both are sensitive people, burdened by well-meaning actions with over-the-top consequences (it hurts to try and explain this one). In (this specific trauma for) CXS case, he was already an adult and in s2 spends the entire time reevaluating and adapting; in LTX's, she was a child and hardly knew how to deal with this guilt and /waves hands/ everything after

I really like this parallel of their running and emotional actions setting off this part of the plot. They cross paths, but the people they help do not have their fate changed significantly by this. But those moments where they FEEL Emma (+Lu Guang in this specific parallel) and Chen Bin were enough to carry LTX and CXS both into their roles in the story.

LTX finally "goes back" to the home she idealized, CXS is waiting at home for his parents. They cross paths, both get shot in that tunnel, but just as quickly go down opposite directions. LTX out of care for her (criminal) brother, parts with him; while CXS waits, he also built a new home for himself with new people he can call family. There's hope for him yet.

*tbh they're a biiiit controlling, but I can see that habit developing through the years, not because they don't mean well