#rather personal but eh I kinda just had this on my mind

[echoed-salvation]

"I wish someone would doom the world just to keep me alive" is a thought I've often found myself thinking, albeit never unaccompanied by guilt, thinking about han sooyoung's sacrifice long after I finished the orv webnovel. To some level I envy kim dokja - the friends who'd do anything for him and the love he receives. No matter how many friends I make there's a feeling that never seems to go away. A feeling of loneliness. A feeling that leads me to never feel like I truly belong, regardless of what I do. There's a silly little part of me that yearns to receive that kind of burning love, that love that is almost a curse in how irrational it makes you act. No matter how much I'm able to resent my very being, I can't help but selfishly wish to be one of the most important things in the world to someone out there.

But then I realise. There is someone who cares about me like that, who cares about all of us. Someone who would write a whole novel just to ensure our survival knowing that we'd find it and read it. Because regardless of what we've all been through and where we are in life we are all kim dokja and maybe, just maybe, we can be selfish for once and believe we deserve that love. You are allowed to exist, allowed to want and allowed to be cared for. Don't let yourself believe that you don't matter.

[riririnnnn]

The one thing I hate about anything fictional—doesn't matter if the character is played by a real life person or not—is that I can't tell if things are intentional or unintentional. And as someone who L O V E S to overthink anything, I find myself losing my mind over Itoshi brothers. For instance, this:

In the above panel, Sae received the soccer ball for the first time during the U-20 match, and look at Rin in that lil panel—it's tough to explain, but before this, Rin was always shown to be hostile whenever Sae was mentioned/involved in a conversation. However, in this lil panel, Rin just looks so.. soft(?). There's a subtle and endearing kind of curiosity faintly visible in his expression, like, "Oh? What is he doing? What is he going to do now? I want to see, I want to see."

Are you getting me?

Of course, that lil panel is rather small and it's difficult to add too much detail in small spaces, so maybe that's why?

Who knows.

And how can we forget this panel when Shidou, unintentionally, kicked Rin's face:

I have talked about this panel before too, I think.

You see, Sae's face never had much expressions throughout the animanga—his face is kinda like 24/7 in nonchalant mode—so it's not that difficult to sense even the slightest changes in his face. I agree that if someone were to get kicked right in their face, anybody will be shocked, but, y'know, I just like to think that Sae's 'shocked' expression was more 'cause of the instinct an older sibling feels whenever their younger sibling(s) get(s) hurt.

And considering the recent chapters (270 & 271), I don't think my words are too farfetched.

On the same note, this:

This one is from Episode Omotesando and seeing the narrative, it seems like it's Rin's POV. And to think that this is how Sae is present in Rin's memory just tears my soul apart, y'know.

The flashback of the snowy night can be considered as a third POV, and we all saw Sae's expressions...

...which are vastly different than what we see Rin remembering him as—different than the lenses of Rin. So, is it a subtle hint that Rin saw something that we, readers, couldn't see? Since in the third POV, we only see disdain and anger and even disgust on Sae's face, but in Rin's memory—in the way Rin remembers his face—we see a whirlwind of emotions, and we can almost see a pitiful and even a sorry epression, like, "I'm angry with you and I know that it's not exactly your fault, but I don't know what else to feel."

...or maybe I'm looking at things too deeply and have gone crazy, eh?

[notmazikeen]

No Space | Toji Fushiguro

 ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

‧₊˚✧[chapter 1]✧˚₊‧     

"He's a what?"

 ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

The music in your car was loud, the bass vibrated your seat with each beat. Today starts your first day of work, without having a supervisor watching you. You were working the nightshift… so naturally you were a bit nervous being alone.

Your phone screen turns black as you reach your new job. Pulling carefully into a parking spot. There were so many people in the parking lot, all wanting to build muscle or lose weight. 

In all honesty, you hadn’t even worked out at this gym yet, even though you were given a year long free membership. There had been tons of people coming up to the front desk asking if there were any open positions. Feelings of doubt and shame crossed your mind. The day hadn’t started like you’d hoped it would, and working your first seven hour shift was shitty.

The gym was blasting a rock music playlist, the same playlist on repeat all day. At least you were the front desk receptionist, you could clean some stuff and then sit around and chill. 

As the hours painfully went by it was now sundown. Only a few more hours to go. Then you could lay back in the comfort of your bed.

Your job was to help the customers with memberships, purchases, greeting them, and cleaning. 

It was pretty laid back honestly. There was no rush to get things done, and the members seemed to be really kind and respectful. 

A truck pulled into the parking lot, blasting loud music, it made you groan internally. You liked playing your music loud but that was just obnoxious.

Finally the truck shuts off and the man in it walks through the front doors. A tall man entered your view. He was rather stout, he wore a baggy t-shirt and sweatpants, but from the sight of his biceps filling in the sleeves of the shirt, you could tell that underneath that he was massive. 

His hair was black and his eyes were almost an unreadable deep blue color. A scar was draped over his lips as well. He had a confident and menacing aura to himself. Maybe he used to be in the military?

The man struts up behind the front desk and waves. “Hey, I’m Toji, we haven’t met yet but I’m a personal trainer.” He gave a soft smile. Maybe this man just had a resting bitch face, because he sounded a lot sweeter than he looked.

You gave him a smile and he reached out his hand in greeting. “Nice to meet you.” Your voice is soft and sweet, contrasting against him. You took his rough hand in yours and shook it gently.

“They throw you to the wolves, Eh?” His biceps strained against the fabric of his shirt as he set his backpack down. You swear you just felt freezing, and suddenly you were burning up.

“Yeah. Aha it’s officially my first shift.” Trying to bring your focus elsewhere you began to search through the computer, aimlessly looking for something, anything to distract yourself.

He gave a nod and chuckled deeply. “If anyone bothers you, come and get me, yeah?” He glanced over in your direction, his attention turning back to the computer he was checking his schedule on. 

You couldn’t help but smile and nod. “Of course, thank you!” And with that, he waved again before strutting off to go work out. He seemed really sweet, maybe the two of you would become closer.

After going around and wiping off the machines in the back of the building a man offered to help you move one of the benches back to its original spot. “Do you need some help?” You quickly shook your head and waved your hand in dismissal. A nervous giggle escaping your lips. “No, 

I got it!”

He nodded and you turned your attention back to the seventy pound bench, but yet you could feel the stare from him burning into your head. You had an amazing sense of reading people before they had even spoken. Something felt off. 

Getting to the last bench into the correct position, a strained huff leaving your lips. “You go girl.” The man said with a grin, ew.

Honestly you weren’t sure if that was what he said, it was kinda hard to hear, but nevertheless it was icky.

After some time you went back to the front desk, spinning in your chair impatiently. Only one more hour until you could finally go back home. It was nine o'clock, only one more hour.

Toji strutted up to the front counter and said his farewell before leaving. You hoped he’d talk to you some more but there was always tomorrow. And would you have a story to tell him tomorrow…

Suddenly you bring your head up and spin slightly to your right. The man from earlier standing on the other side of the counter. “Have a nice night.” You politely smiled.  He didn’t budge. “You as well, also you’re really pretty by the way.” He gleamed. An overly confident aura emitting from him, deep down you knew he was most likely a dickhead.

A nervous laugh erupted from your throat, you felt a little flustered. Not everyday do you get a compliment and it had been so long since you had heard one. One from a random person made it all that more meaningful. 

“Oh, thank you aha!” You tried to stay calm, something just felt so off… 

The man smiled back at you before walking towards the door, you heard his footsteps abruptly stop before he spun back to you. “Do you have a boyfriend by the way?” In a shocked state, you blurted out, “Yes, haha.” Rubbing the back of your neck and looking away.

He was in no way attractive to you. 

His douchebag aura, his voice, his looks, his odd outfit. Everything was a turn off.

“Well he’s a very lucky guy!” The man added before finally walking out the door.

What the hell. That was honestly so weird. You knew he’d say something just from the way he looked at you, but you didn’t know he’d be so forward.

After the hour had passed, it was finally time to go home. All of the inside lights were off and it was quiet.

The dark scared you, and any normal person would have shit their pants at the sight in front of you. 

Peeking out of the garage door glass, there was a truck parked right outside the door you needed to go out of to leave. The truck was turned off and the cabin lights were off as well. Giving you no idea if someone was inside the truck or not.

Your skin raised in bumps and you felt a twisting knot in your gut. Your intuition was spot on almost every single time, so naturally you factimed your mom. 

“Mom… someone is outside the door and I’m scared to leave. Their lights are off and I don’t know…something feels off.” You whispered. Scared that the person outside may hear you.

Your mom comforted you and told you to stay on the phone, you stayed on facetime with her for forty minutes before the truck finally peeled out of the parking lot. Your gut told you that if you went outside, something bad might have happened.

After that unnerving situation, you finally got into your car safely before driving home.

The car ride was quiet, the music was loud coming from your speakers, but your brain blocked it. The hair on your neck still raised in anxiety.

The next day was quick to approach. You made it to work and basically fucked around for a few hours before Toji came in two hours before close. You brought up the events of last night and he showed concern across his face.

“If something like that happens again, and I’m here, come get me. I don’t want anyone messing with you.” His tone was hinting a protective aura from it.

You nodded and he gave you a weak smile. During training a few weeks back, you had seen him around but never took note of his name or anything, but he interacted with your coworkers differently. 

This made you feel safe and comforted. In all honesty, it was a little silly to freak out over such a small thing, but the thought of the man who was flirting with you, waiting outside to confront you, was terrifying. 

You made your way to the women’s restroom to restock some items and mop the floor. This was one of your least favorite tasks because women would always walk in and dirty the mirror, after you had already cleaned it. 

Toji made his presence known, trying his best not to frighten you. He stood at the entrance of the bathroom. The door was propped open so as he said hey, his rough knuckles tapped on the wood. 

Hearing his voice made you smile. You were quick to turn around and come into his field of view. “Hey.” You smiled and gave him a smile. A tired smile.

“I’m leaving, but let me put my number in your phone, just in case something happens.” You nodded and wrote his number down in your contacts. His eyes watching your every move intently.

“Okay there.” You saved his number and closed your phone before looking back up at him. He leaned in close and gave you a small side hug. A rather odd gesture, but comforting?

“I’m serious. Call me if someone is giving you trouble, I live down the road. I’ll come to you.” His lips curled into a toothy grin and it almost sounded like he smelt your hair. Maybe he was just inhaling.

With a small nod and a farewell he left the gym. Your stomach feeling all giddy, and your shift ending, you felt like the night ended perfectly. To be fair though, you’d never actually want to call him if something did happen. Regardless of how much he made it known that he’d protect you. 

The end of your week was rather slow, Toji hadn’t come in for a few days. There were some other guys whom you’d catch staring at you, but no more interactions like the first guy. The days passed so slowly. Your favorite person to see at the gym made your days more enjoyable, and with him gone, it was agonizing. 

As the week finally ended, you had a break in your schedule. A few of your friends from college asked if you could come out for drinks, of course you couldn’t say no. Except the bar you were going to was in the same town as your work. And the thought of somehow seeing Toji there made you all that more excited to go.

You slipped on some jean shorts and a low-cut baby tee, your hair down, and your makeup subtle but very noticeable. You looked stunning. Compliments from your friends made that known to you.

Your group met up in the parking lot, talking away about this and that. Nobody knew about Toji and you wanted to keep it that way. He was a few years older than you, and you didn’t want to risk getting lectured over that.

As your friend group walked into the bar, the place was bustling with music and people. A very lively scene. It made your spirits high and your excitement higher. 

There was a big round booth in the corner of the bar and your friends decided to set up camp there. This made you able to see almost every part of the bar, besides the alcohol counter. The bar was set up to where the booths lined the walls and the dance floor was in the middle of the building. The drink counter was located on the same wall as your booth, and your back was turned away from the counter. 

Everyone ordered some kind of drink before making their way onto the dance floor, while you stayed behind for a moment to fix your lipstick. You had hoped a guy would ask you to dance, so you needed to touch up your makeup. Deep down you had really stayed behind because you were nervous all of the sudden. What if Toji really was here for some random reason. 

You finished your lipstick before sipping down the last few sips of your drink. You decided you weren’t all that tipsy, and you needed to get another drink in your system before feeling confident enough to dance. 

As you made your way to the counter, there were a few men beside you, girls fawning over them. You glanced around and you swear you saw a larger man walking through the crowd. Butterflies filled up your stomach. Was he really here?

The stout man made his way to the bar beside you, but it wasn’t Toji. Just some other random person that had black hair and muscles. You didn’t even realize a sigh escaped your throat before the man cleared his.

“Rough night?” He grumbled. His voice sounded nothing like Toji’s but you guess it was attractive.

You nodded and gave a very weak smile, but then squinted your eyes in remembering you were here to have fun. “Sorta.”

He nodded back and chuckled deeply. The bartender strutted over to the two of you and you placed your order, but the man beside you paid for your drink. You smiled and stepped a bit closer to him. “Awe thank you!” You giggled softly. 

“Of course, pretty lady.” His hand reached out in greeting. “Names Shiu Kong. When you finish your drink, want to dance?” You shook his hand generously and introduced yourself. “I don’t see why not.” You tilted your head with an eye squinting smile.

You quickly downed your drink before making your way to the dance floor, Shiu in tow. 

The bar seemed to play actually decent music, the building was filled with voices singing and bodies dancing against each other. Now that you had a good amount of alcohol in your system you were feeling free.

Shiu made some small talk with you as you danced against him. A smile never leaving his lips. 

You closed your eyes and really drank in the vibrations of the music. Feeling Shiu’s hands graze along the sides of your waist, swaying you along with him. For a moment you felt a weird gut feeling, like something was off. You opened your eyes and were met with a handsome sight. 

Toji was across the bar, sitting in a booth by himself. Staring intently at you and Shiu. It made your skin crawl the way he stared. You turned your gaze elsewhere and hoped he didn’t notice you gawking at him.

You made Shiu spin you around so that his back was now facing Toji, hoping to create some space between Toji’s gaze.

After a few songs and Shiu meeting your friends, you felt absolutely plastered. Your friends just kept ordering shots and you were drunk. Shiu also got progressively more drunk as well, and as he did he became more touchy. Which you didn’t mind all that much.

The two of you sat at your booth alone, you sat on his lap and sloppily made out with him. The alcohol fuzzing up your brain. He had hinted at taking you home but you insisted you didn’t do one night stands unfortunately. Shiu understood that though, and was polite enough to not pester you about it. 

As your night out began to come to an end, he asked for your number before he left. You said you’d text him soon, but honestly would you remember to? You could barely even see straight, maybe drinking so much was a bad idea. 

Your friends said they’d want to leave in about an hour, so you were soaking up the enjoyment with them while it lasted. Every now and then, your eyes would catch Toji staring at you. A cold blooded stare.

You wanted to go over to him and say hi but maybe you shouldn’t. He had just seen you sitting in a guy’s lap and his tongue down your throat. It was slightly embarrassing, but nothing too bad.

One of your favorite songs began to fade into the speakers, making you and your friends squeal with excitement. “House Of Balloons - The Weeknd” started to blast in your ears. The music enhancing the tension between you and Toji.

You danced in a rather sleazy motion against your friends, your gaze catching his as the lyrics spat out “You belong to meeeee.” A small grin escaping your lips as his eyes narrowed slightly. You could barely see the same smirk plastered on his face.

The Weeknd always knew how to capture an attractive moment so well. You ran your hand through your hair and closed your eyes again as the song faded into the next. This song was more fitting towards your situation and it made you become flustered.

“Older - Isabel LaRosa” 

You sang the words and opened your eyes again as you felt a presence close to you, and they didn’t smell feminine. 

“Older, huh?” He scoffed slightly. Your friends backed away giggling and letting out a few wolf whistles.

You grinned and nodded. “Yeah, and?” A challenge in your voice. 

Toji let out a chuckle and clicked his tongue against his teeth. “Shiu is like twice your age, y’know.” You felt a little taken aback, he knew Shiu???

“Wait, how’d you-” You were cut off by another deep chuckle from him. “We’re business partners. Not at the gym though.” He said slyly. You could tell he had drank, his rough voice dripped with the intoxicating smell of whiskey. 

You rolled your eyes and huffed. “What can I say, older guys have their shit together.” You shrugged before turning to walk away. Your head turning over your shoulder to glance at him one more time. 

“Bye, Toji.” You smirked subtly before making your way towards the exit of the building. Your feet trying their hardest to carry your body weight. Fuck, you drank more than you had thought. 

Toji bit his lip as you walked away before sighing loudly, his feet dragging after you. He really didn't know why he was following you, it was like his body was out of his control.

“Wait, uh let me walk you out.” He grinned before aiding you in pushing past the sea of bodies. His tall figure made people move out of your way, he looked terrifying from first glance.

You felt his hand find its way to the small of your back, acting like he didn’t think you’d notice. His fingertips rubbing small subtle circles against your spine. 

As you reached the stairs outside of the building, your foot caught the edge of the concrete stairs and you tumbled forward. Except you didn’t hit the ground.

Instead your back somehow felt something rough. Toji reacted fast and grabbed your waist tightly, pressing your back against his chest. With a huff of embarrassment, you tapped his hand to signal he could let go now. 

Your skin was raised in goosebumps now, and your heart fluttered. His grasp was protective over you. “Watch yourself.” He mumbled before giving you some space. His hand going back to its place on your back. 

Finally you found your friend's car, a few of your friends in the backseat, all gawking at the man behind you. 

“Thank you, see you at work?” You smiled and turned around to face him. You face turning a deep shade of red as you could hear your girlfriends giggling in the backseat.

He chuckled and gave a toothy grin. “See you at work.” His thumb rubbed up along your spine before he turned to walk away. He stopped and angled his head just enough to where you could see his menacing eyes. “Good night, panther.” His chuckle is almost hoarse. 

You playfulled rolled your eyes at him. “Good night, Toji.” And with that he walked off, and you got into the front seat. 

“Oh my gosh! Who was that?!” Your friends began to bombard you with questions around this mystery man.

You sat happily in your seat and smiled giddily. “Toji. We work together.”

You wondered how this was gonna go down at work. Hopefully it was kept a secret between you two. 

You knew that in a few days when you worked again, you’d have something or someone to look forward to.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

@catobsessedlady @yuuuumii

[hearts4golbach]

Hayloft.

This fanfiction is co-written by @charcharbinks333.

pairing:

Highschool!Sam Golbach x Highschool!Fem!Reader.

a/n:

"young lovers and they are not sleeping, young lovers in the hayloft."

proofread

warnings:

sexual references if you squint.

word count:

3.8k

Small, repetitive taps echoed throughout your room. Your eyes fluttered open, the noise finally startling you awake. You rolled out of your bed groggily, walking over to the window with careful steps.

You peeked outside to see a familiar blonde haired boy outside your window. He held a handful of the pebbles that decorated the outside of your house. You rolled your eyes and cracked your window open. “What the hell are you doing, Golbach? Do you even know what time it is?”

Sam stared up at you, immediately speechless as his eyes met yours. The dim lighting from your room barely illuminated your features, just enough for him to see. “Look, I know it’s late, and I’m probably the last person you want to see standing in your yard, but I have to show you something,” he pleaded, scattering the rocks back into their decorative piles among the grass.

He held a hand out to you, knowing you couldn’t reach, but simply as a gesture to imply you should follow him. You knew you’d be dead if your parents knew you were leaving this late, but couldn’t it be deemed worth it to see just what he was bothering you for?

“And why can't this wait til the morning?” You asked skeptically. His watercolor eyes held a hopeful look, seeing as your response wasn't necessarily negative. It definitely wasn't a no.

“What's the fun in that?” His big goofy smile made your heart skip a beat. He looked down, kicking at the dirt. “there's really no one else I'd rather show this to.”

You stared at him for a moment more, contemplating your options. If you got caught, you'd be dead. But, what's the worst that could happen? “And what do I get out of this?”

He shrugged. “Hanging out with me?”

The hopeful look he held was nothing if not enticing to you. You leaned out the window further, sighing as you checked for anyone else around. It was just him, clearly he had no ill intention. Or maybe he did.

“Eh, why the hell not,” you say with an obvious eye roll, shutting your window before he could respond. You take your time moving toward the back door, making your hasty exit before you could be caught.

“I knew you’d come around,” he cooed with a cocky smile.

“Honestly, kinda felt like I was being held at gunpoint,” you teased. “I mean, what can I say? Can't ignore you forever.”

He let out a small laugh. “I'm glad you feel that way.”

“Don't make me change my mind,” you warned. “What do you even have to show me, anyway? Don't you have your little boyfriend, Cole or something?”

“Colby is sleeping.” He emphasized his best friend's name. “My car is parked right up the street,” he mentioned, matching his walking pace with yours.

“Uh, excuse me. I was sleeping too,” you muttered.

“Well, he would've killed me if I woke him up. I thought since you want to kill me either way, it was worth a shot.” A small smile was plastered on his face. He felt as if he couldn't stop smiling, he finally got you to give him some sort of a chance.

You roll your eyes, chuckling dryly at his statement. “Yeah, whatever. I never wanted to kill you, necessarily. That’s just an exaggeration…”

It wasn’t at all an exaggeration. Your mind helplessly wandered to your past interactions, not a single one showing any sort of connection.

“Ew, as if, Golbach! Go bother your boyfriend instead,” you scoffed as he leaned closer to you, his signature—and clearly fake—cocky smirk plastered on his pale skin. You shoved him away and he stumbled back into a desk, his mouth hanging agape as he stared at you in shock. You’d never laid a hand on him, but he couldn’t do anything back… you were a girl! He couldn’t hit a girl…

The gross look on your face snapped him back to reality. “You know, that was really uncalled for,” he muttered before storming off.

You shook the thought from your head, seeing as that scene happened all the way back in middle school. Maybe in that moment, you did want to kill him, but you never truly did.

“Okay, Y/n.” He laughed, a sarcastic undertone to everything he said. You knew he was just protecting his heart. He had his guard up around you now, and you were starting to feel bad about it.

Your voice softened. You didn't know how to apologize without sounding like a pussy, but you felt like it was needed. The weird tension was slowly getting to you. “Maybe I disliked you very much, but I never hated you, Sam.”

“Past tense?” He asked, a laugh falling from his lips. “Do you actually like me now?”

“I can tolerate your presence,” you rebutted.

What seemed like a crack in his hard exterior became more and more visible by the second. He smiled. The realest smile you’d seen from him.

“Yeah, well, you’re not too bad yourself,” he joked, playfully bumping your shoulder with his.

You both finally arrived at Sam’s car, after what felt like an eternity. The next shocker—he opened the door for you. Your eyes lingered on him for a moment before you ducked down and settled yourself in the passenger seat.

“Y’know, I didn’t peg you for a gentleman.” He settled on his side and started the car after a few stalls. He glanced over at you with a dry chuckle, a clear and sarcastic sign that none of his gestures could be deemed gentlemanly.

Sam explained that it was quite a long drive before going quiet. An awkward silence filled the car as you listened intently to the soft radio.

As houses and barns started to disperse, you knew you were leaving town. It was a small town, give or take, so you weren't necessarily surprised. What you were was concerned. “Are you kidnapping me?”

Sam shook his head and chuckled, changing the radio station as he drove. “No, we’re going to a very common hang out spot among my friends. you may not like it though, princess,” he teased. He stopped his car in a large patch of pebbles, and all you could see was a large prairie on the outskirts of a small forest.

“Oh shit, are you taking me to the legendary barn?” You ask with an eager smile. You’d heard stories of this place, but never thought you’d ever go.

“Yeah, and it’s a long walk, so no complaining.” He got out of the car and walked around to your side, opening the door for you.

You couldn't help your face from heating up at the smallest gesture. The moon illuminated Sam's features, especially the ones you had never taken the time to notice. You caught yourself staring, making your heart jump. You looked down at your feet as you followed behind him.

You listened closely to Sam's soft footsteps in the dirt mixed with the noises of crickets chirping in the far distance. He quickly broke the silence. “I'm honestly surprised you've heard about our barn.”

“Your barn,” you muttered under your breath with a laugh. “It's not like you guys are secretive about your ‘investigations.’ Colby posts on his Facebook so much.”

Sam laughed sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck. “Yeah, no, that’s true… I tried to tell him our spot would be invaded if he kept posting, but he’s stubborn. Don’t get me wrong, though, he’s a great guy, just doesn’t think ahead." The way he spoke about his best friend was kind of cute, like he held Colby on a pedestal of sorts, it was admirable.

“Are we almost there?” you chimed, breaking the momentary silence. Sam holds a low-hanging branch out of your way as you enter the forest.

“Not much further, so don’t worry.” You both trekked through the forest, making it to the edge of the trees when the barn finally came into view.

The atmosphere was so peaceful, yet terrifying. Sam walking close beside you was a comforting presence. His hand brushed against yours, sending goosebumps all over your body. Your stomach was doing backflips as you looked at him.

He led you into the barn. You Looked up at the hay bales stacked close to the roof. Your jaw fell open at the sight. “How the hell do you even get up there?”

“Look, I’ll show you.” Dirt kicked up under his shoes as he jogged over to a singular hay bale on the floor. “You just climb up these, it's basically a staircase.” He jumped to the second one.

You bobbed over and climbed on top of it, following his lead. “Is this safe?”

He hesitated. “No.. But I'll make sure you're safe. don't worry, baby,” he teased with a smile. He held out his hand. You took it and he pulled you up to the next hay bale.

Baby? The name alone made your heart pound out of your chest, or maybe it was the anxiety from the American Ninja Warrior-esque trek up to the top of the hay bails. As you finally made it, you had a straight-shot view of the moon. There were holes in the aluminum panels that gave you a perfect view of the night sky, and only wooden beams supporting the metal that could easily fall on you at any moment.

“You said you come here often, right?” You wanted reassurance that the roof wouldn’t collapse on you and end up another town-wide horror story. He nodded his head as he settled toward the top of the hay, patting the spot next to him. You settle there hesitantly, nervous you’d fall down to your death at any moment.

“Don’t be afraid, you won’t fall,” he said, clearly comforting you. He wrapped his arm around your waist. “If you start falling, I’ll be here to make sure you don’t die or whatever.” He flashed a charming smile your way.

His touch made your mind foggy. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of your waist as you spoke. “What do you and Colby even do when you're here?”

“We play little kid games, like tag, and run around on the hay bales,” he explained. “Do you remember when I had to wear a fat ass brace to school for like, a week?”

You nodded. He seemed to be amused that you remembered such a small detail.

“Yeah, that was ‘cause my ankle got stuck in between these bales. Colby physically couldn't stop laughing at me.” Sam adjusted, scooting closer to you.

His obvious attempts to remain close to you didn’t go unnoticed. You fidgeted with the hem of your shirt, trying to find something to say to keep talking to him. You couldn’t help but love his voice, especially with him this close to you…

“I always found your voice really comforting, y’know,” you blurted out before you could stop yourself. His eyebrows raised in amusement as he glanced over at you, his teeth grazing his lower lip for a moment.

“Wow, really? People usually say I sound like a squeaky toy.” His joke was emphasized by an accidental voice crack, and his pale face immediately flushed red. You nudge him playfully with your elbow, teasing him.

“Aww, you sound like a 12 year old boy,” you coo.

“Wow, watch me hit puberty all over again,” he joked. “I'm kidding, I hit puberty a long time ago, don't worry.”

You rolled your eyes as he winked at you. “Thanks for letting me know,” you reply sarcastically.

“Really, though. I don't know what to say to that,” he admitted, avoiding eye contact with you. You watched intently as he picked at the hay under the two of you. He seemed hesitant, choking on his words. “Y/n, there's something I really need to tell you.”

You turn back to look at him, your head cocked to the side. You’d never seen him so hesitant, he seemed… insecure, even. You held your lower lip between your teeth for a moment, the tension between the two practically killing you. “Y-yeah…?”

His eyes drifted to somewhere behind you, his brows raising for a moment. He had the chance to get away from this painfully awkward position, realizing he wasn’t quite ready yet. “There’s a… There’s a ladder behind you, we could go to the roof, if you’d like,” he suggested with a coy shrug of his shoulders.

Sam mentally chided himself. He wanted so badly to confess to you, but something about the moment didn’t feel right. Something was off. He scratched the back of his neck nervously as he awaited your answer, looking up at you through his brows.

“Uhm, okay. Yeah.” Sam stood up and offered his hand to you. You gratefully took it and he pulled you to a standing position. You awkwardly followed him up the ladder to the roof.

The night was gorgeous. Out in the middle of nowhere, there weren't any lights or noises to interrupt the music of the nighttime. You admired the twinkling stars in the sky that reminded you of Sam's eyes every time he saw you. You couldn't get enough of how he looked at you.

He stood next to you, staring up at the sky as well. “It’s really nice outside,” he broke the silence, before turning to you. “Come sit with me?”

You hummed in response. He walked to the edge of the roof and sat down, letting his feet dangle off the ledge. You sat next to him, mirroring his position. You sat dangerously close to him, placing your hand on top of his softly.

You felt uneasy sitting up there, like you could fall at any moment. You looked down to the ground and tensed up, your hand squeezing Sam’s. He shifted closer to you and moved to wrap his arm around your shoulder, giving you a sense of comfort.

“Don’t worry, only a few people have fallen through or off this roof. Maybe like, 7?” You shove him gently as he tried to scare you, but it earned a hearty laugh from you.

“Alright, alright, no reason to be scared, blah blah…” you trail off as you turn your head, realizing just how close the two of you were. You could feel his warm breath against your face, causing a shudder to run down your spine.

Sam’s gaze flicked down to your lips momentarily, before meeting your eyes once again. Something was hidden in the pale blue color of his irises, some kind of longing. “There was something I wanted to tell you, y/n,” he whispered, each word he spoke laced with unease and anxiety.

“Just fucking spit it out, Golbach,” you muttered. He was so close, you could hear his uneasy breathing. “Please.”

“I love you, Y/n. God, I knew I'd love you as soon as we spoke for the first time, even if you were mean to me,” he paused, taking a deep breath.

Sam had been one of those untouchable boys since middle school. All of the girls wanted him, but he had never shown any interest. It was that moment you realized why.

His bright blue eyes met yours. “Fuck, I've never loved anyone like I love you. You don’t- You don't have to say anything, but I want you to know.” He moved his arm from your shoulder to wrap tightly around your waist. You could feel how badly he was shaking.

You raise your eyebrows, taking a moment to process everything he had said to you. Your hand trembled slightly as you reached out, brushing his hair away from his eyes gently.

“You mean more to me than you could ever know,” you murmured, “I never… meant to hurt you, Sam, I just taught myself to hate you because I thought you hated me, but in reality… goddamn, I think I love you too.” Your hand moves to cup his cheek, your touch ghosting his skin, feathery almost.

His shoulders relaxed as soon as you confessed. It was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders, like he could walk on water. Anything was possible now that he knew: you loved him. He pulled you closer by your waist, his eyes boring holes into you.

“I’ve been waiting so long to hear you say that,” he whispered, his eyes fixed on your lips now, wanting more than anything to lean in closer.

His lips finally met yours. They moved in a sweet, sensual motion. He tasted of vanilla, a surprisingly sweet combination with your minty gum. He moved his hands down to your hips, squeezing gently as he held the kiss for as long as you let him.

Sam could've kissed you forever. You wrapped your arms around his neck and tangled your fingers in his honey locks.

You pulled away a moment to catch your breath, but he immediately chased your lips. He was insanely desperate for you, to not lose your touch for even a moment.

You tug playfully on his golden hair, earning a soft grunt from him. One of his hands moved to the roof beside you to keep himself steady.

He pulled away, breathing heavily. He gazed into your eyes, resting his sweaty forehead against yours. You couldn't help but smile and place a soft peck against his lips. “I love you, Sam. I'm sorry for everything before, I wish I wasn't so stupid.”

“You're not stupid. I’m stupidly in love with you.” He grinned at the cheesy saying. You rolled your eyes with a contradictory smile.

He took your hand in his, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles slowly. He looked up at the sky, the stars shining beautifully, sure, but they couldn’t compare to you.

“There's Orion's belt.” you pointed out the constellation, a smile on your face. What a dork… he thought to himself. He followed your hand and looked up at the sky once again, finding the constellation easily with your guidance.

“All these stars, yet somehow you shine brighter,” he murmured, as if thinking aloud without realizing. a red hue meets your cheeks as you look back at him, your brows raised.

“Well I'll be damned, he’s a poet,” you teased. He rolled his eyes and scoffed.

“Yeah, yeah, I'm a poet and I didn't even know it or whatever corny shit you’re gonna say next,” he laughed sarcastically.

You lightly slapped his shoulder. “Now I'm the corny one?”

He rolled his eyes. “I should probably take you home soon, don't want your parents flipping out.”

You let out a sad sigh. “I guess you're right.”

The venture back to the car was no easier than getting there. Sam helped you down the ladder and off of the hay bales. He interlocked his fingers with yours as you carefully walked out of the barn.

“When can I see you again?” he asked suddenly. “I mean, I know we have school Monday, but that's still one day I don't get to see you. Do you even know how much I hate that?”

You giggled. “If I'm not grounded, come over tomorrow. My parents are working, so we'll have the whole house to ourselves.”

He smirked, “I'm completely okay with that.”

You slapped his arm again. “Shut up, not like that!”

He shrugged. “Can’t blame a boy for his mind wandering.”

The drive back to your house was silent as Sam was caught in his own mind. He could see you again tomorrow? And what did tonight mean for the two of you? He wanted to be your boyfriend, more than anything, but he couldn’t be sure that you wanted the same. He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel to the rhythm of the song playing—some old rock song or something.

He parked a few houses down from yours, getting out of the car before you and jogging around to your side to once again open the door for you.

“You are such a gentleman,” you say with a fake posh accent and a clumsy faux-curtsey. You giggle as he shuts the door as quietly as possible, not wanting to raise suspicion from anyone on the street.

He walked you back to your house, his arm around your shoulder, shielding you from the cold.

“You planning on coming in with me or something?” you accused with a quiet laugh under your breath.

“I mean, do you want me to?”

“Yeah,” you tried to say nonchalantly, but ended up giggling.

He followed you in through the back door and tiptoed quietly through the house. This was the first time he was really seeing your room. He looked around at your pale walls that were covered with miscellaneous decorations and your messy bed. He couldn't help but smile. He felt like he was looking at your whole life in one small area. To be fair, he was.

You collapsed onto your bed with a huff. “I am exhausted.”

“I’ll let you go back to sleep, I'm going to go home.” He walked over and placed a kiss on your forehead. “I love you, y/n.”

“Wait!” You grabbed his hand as he started to walk towards your door. “Stay, please?”

His face lit up as you grabbed his hand, he turned back to you, kneeling beside your bed. “Do you really want me to stay?” he whispered, his brows quirked.

“Of course I do.” You scoot closer to the wall and pat the spot on your bed beside you. He hesitantly sat down, leaning back against your headboard. He looked up and saw the Napoleon Dynamite poster on your ceiling, which brought a small smile to his lips.

“I love Napoleon Dynamite,” he said, looking down at you once again. You looked 10 times more comfortable with him sitting beside you. His heart was immediately warmed seeing you grasp onto his sleeve.

“So do I,” you said in a surprisingly casual tone, considering your stomach was being immediately swarmed with butterflies as he mentioned loving your favorite movie.

Silence filled the room for a moment. He interrupted the silence. “Why are you so far away? c'mere.”

He opened his arms to you as he laid down in your bed. You wrapped your arms around him, resting your head on his chest. “Y'know, it's so much cozier in here with you.”

He smiled, placing a kiss on the top of your head. “Everything's better when I'm with you.”

You felt your heart, which was once pounding against your ribcage as you adjusted to his touch, calming down as you cuddled into his chest. You exhaled softly, feeling your eyelids growing heavier by the moment.

“Goodnight, Golbach,” you teased, finally feeling the warmth of your duvet as he pulled it over the both of you.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” He kissed the top of your head once again. He ran his hand up and down your back, slowly coaxing you into sleep.

[basmathgirl]

I feel bad for Donna that she is stuck with the sad old weasel version of the Doctor. The way she looked at Fifteen!!! Overall Fifteen is probably the most conventionally attractive, the most outright sexy and fit Doctor (ever?). Not saying the others weren’t attractive at all, but back then they portrayed the Doctor more in the nerdy/ geeky-attractive kinda way. I think considering Fifteen’s charm, charisma, humour and looks, after his run he might end up as “The Sexy Doctor”. I know Donna would agree. In general the new TARDIS-Team with Millie Gibson, Varada Sethu and of course Ncuti Gatwa is ridiculously good looking. I guess New New Who doesn’t allow “ugly”/ normal looking people any longer. 😂

Hello kind Anon

I get the feeling that you are a great deal younger than I am (and rather ageist), because I know the "sad old weasel version of the Doctor"

will be only a temporary situation. Soon, he'll be back to his cheerful, pre-bigeneration self. Look at how delighted he was to be reuninited with Donna

And Donna doesn't seem to mind at all with being 'stuck' with him.

especially when her old best friend ocassionally looks at her like this:

Even the Not-Thing!Doctor knew how he felt about her.

I totally agree that the Fifteenth Doctor is a very attractive man/being. His good looks, kindness, intelligence and charm won us all over instantly upon his emergence.

Oh yes, he knows what he's doing to us.

But as for "the most outright sexy and fit Doctor (ever?)" well... I was around for the anouncement of Peter Davison as the Fifth Doctor; and Paul McGann as the Eighth Doctor. Both were generally considered very fine specimens of manhood, back in the day! And truth be told, I still get a thrill out of seeing them in anything. Sexiness is a matter of personal taste, after all. Plus, while I appreciate Ncuti Gatwa visually (among other things), I feel he is rather too young for me. I'm more likely to pat his cheek and try to feed him up.

Grandmothers, eh?! What are we like.

We've only had one episode of RTD's latest Season 1 run (if we ignore the 60th anniversary specials) so as far as "I guess New New Who doesn’t allow “ugly”/ normal looking people any longer. 😂" is concerned, it's a bit hard to tell how influential the move to Disney+ has over the general casting. Especially when you try to dodge any spoilers. Not that Moffat was immune to casting based on looks rather than talent, but I am expecting to see more conventially attractive people to appear in the coming episodes.

Of course, I'm hoping that the old trend of hiring decent actors rather than model/actors will be maintained, but you never know how that extra streaming coinage will be. The casting of attractive companions like Millie Gibson and Varada Sethu was no surprise at all. *mentally beats the 'something for the dads' thinking to a pulp* In fact, it's refreshing when that doesn't happen.

Personally, I want RTD to create those DW spinoffs he jokingly referred to when the Disney+ announcement was made. Those tend to be pretty good and/or interesting.

In conclusion, while I really love the new, Fifteenth Doctor and look forward to seeing his adventures.

Donna certainly appreciated his physique and good looks, but I could never turn my back on the Fourteenth Doctor. I mean... Just look at him

He needs our special love. Especially because he loves and adores Donna. In the way she deserves to be.

[charcharbinks333]

S.G ~ Hayloft.

❝𝙔𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙜 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙮 𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙨𝙡𝙚𝙚𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙜, 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙜 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙖𝙮 (𝙡𝙤𝙛𝙩)❞

content:

highschool!sam golbach x highschool!reader.

warnings:

sexual references if you squint. use of y/n.

word count:

3.8k.

proofread.

Small, repetitive taps echoed throughout your room. Your eyes fluttered open, the noise finally startling you awake. You rolled out of your bed groggily, walking over to the window with careful steps. 

You peeked outside to see a familiar blonde haired boy outside your window. He held a handful of the pebbles that decorated the outside of your house. You rolled your eyes and cracked your window open. “What the hell are you doing, Golbach? Do you even know what time it is?” 

Sam stared up at you, immediately speechless as his eyes met yours. The dim lighting from your room barely illuminated your features, just enough for him to see. “Look, I know it’s late, and I’m probably the last person you want to see standing in your yard, but I have to show you something,” he pleaded, scattering the rocks back into their decorative piles among the grass. 

He held a hand out to you, knowing you couldn’t reach, but simply as a gesture to imply you should follow him. You knew you’d be dead if your parents knew you were leaving this late, but couldn’t it be deemed worth it to see just what he was bothering you for?

“And why can't this wait til the morning?” You asked skeptically. His watercolor eyes held a hopeful look, seeing as your response wasn't necessarily negative. It definitely wasn't a no. 

“What's the fun in that?” His big goofy smile made your heart skip a beat. He looked down, kicking at the dirt. “there's really no one else I'd rather show this to.” 

You stared at him for a moment more, contemplating your options. If you got caught, you'd be dead. But, what's the worst that could happen? “And what do I get out of this?” 

He shrugged. “Hanging out with me?” 

The hopeful look he held was nothing if not enticing to you. You leaned out the window further, sighing as you checked for anyone else around. It was just him, clearly he had no ill intention. Or maybe he did.

“Eh, why the hell not,” you say with an obvious eye roll, shutting your window before he could respond. You take your time moving toward the back door, making your hasty exit before you could be caught.

“I knew you’d come around,” he cooed with a cocky smile.

“Honestly, kinda felt like I was being held at gunpoint,” you teased. “I mean, what can I say? Can't ignore you forever.” 

He let out a small laugh. “I'm glad you feel that way.” 

“Don't make me change my mind,” you warned. “What do you even have to show me, anyway? Don't you have your little boyfriend, Cole or something?” 

“Colby is sleeping.” He emphasized his best friend's name. “My car is parked right up the street,” he mentioned, matching his walking pace with yours. 

“Uh, excuse me. I was sleeping too,” you muttered. 

“Well, he would've killed me if I woke him up. I thought since you want to kill me either way, it was worth a shot.” A small smile was plastered on his face. He felt as if he couldn't stop smiling, he finally got you to give him some sort of a chance. 

You roll your eyes, chuckling dryly at his statement. “Yeah, whatever. I never wanted to kill you, necessarily. That’s just an exaggeration…”

It wasn’t at all an exaggeration. Your mind helplessly wandered to your past interactions, not a single one showing any sort of connection. 

“Ew, as if, Golbach! Go bother your boyfriend instead,” you scoffed as he leaned closer to you, his signature—and clearly fake—cocky smirk plastered on his pale skin. You shoved him away and he stumbled back into a desk, his mouth hanging agape as he stared at you in shock. You’d never laid a hand on him, but he couldn’t do anything back… you were a girl! He couldn’t hit a girl…

The gross look on your face snapped him back to reality. “You know, that was really uncalled for,” he muttered before storming off. 

You shook the thought from your head, seeing as that scene happened all the way back in middle school. Maybe in that moment, you did want to kill him, but you never truly did. 

“Okay, Y/n.” He laughed, a sarcastic undertone to everything he said. You knew he was just protecting his heart. He had his guard up around you now, and you were starting to feel bad about it. 

Your voice softened. You didn't know how to apologize without sounding like a pussy, but you felt like it was needed. The weird tension was slowly getting to you. “Maybe I disliked you very much, but I never hated you, Sam.” 

“Past tense?” He asked, a laugh falling from his lips. “Do you actually like me now?” 

“I can tolerate your presence,” you rebutted. 

What seemed like a crack in his hard exterior became more and more visible by the second. He smiled. The realest smile you’d seen from him. 

“Yeah, well, you’re not too bad yourself,” he joked, playfully bumping your shoulder with his.

You both finally arrived at Sam’s car, after what felt like an eternity. The next shocker—he opened the door for you. Your eyes lingered on him for a moment before you ducked down and settled yourself in the passenger seat. 

“Y’know, I didn’t peg you for a gentleman.” He settled on his side and started the car after a few stalls. He glanced over at you with a dry chuckle, a clear and sarcastic sign that none of his gestures could be deemed gentlemanly.

Sam explained that it was quite a long drive before going quiet. An awkward silence filled the car as you listened intently to the soft radio. 

As houses and barns started to disperse, you knew you were leaving town. It was a small town, give or take, so you weren't necessarily surprised. What you were was concerned. “Are you kidnapping me?” 

Sam shook his head and chuckled, changing the radio station as he drove. “No, we’re going to a very common hang out spot among my friends. you may not like it though, princess,” he teased. He stopped his car in a large patch of pebbles, and all you could see was a large prairie on the outskirts of a small forest.

“Oh shit, are you taking me to the legendary barn?” You ask with an eager smile. You’d heard stories of this place, but never thought you’d ever go.

“Yeah, and it’s a long walk, so no complaining.” He got out of the car and walked around to your side, opening the door for you.

You couldn't help your face from heating up at the smallest gesture. The moon illuminated Sam's features, especially the ones you had never taken the time to notice. You caught yourself staring, making your heart jump. You looked down at your feet as you followed behind him.  

You listened closely to Sam's soft footsteps in the dirt mixed with the noises of crickets chirping in the far distance. He quickly broke the silence. “I'm honestly surprised you've heard about our barn.”

“Your barn,” you muttered under your breath with a laugh. “It's not like you guys are secretive about your ‘investigations.’ Colby posts on his Facebook so much.” 

Sam laughed sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck. “Yeah, no, that’s true… I tried to tell him our spot would be invaded if he kept posting, but he’s stubborn. Don’t get me wrong, though, he’s a great guy, just doesn’t think ahead." The way he spoke about his best friend was kind of cute, like he held Colby on a pedestal of sorts, it was admirable.

“Are we almost there?” you chimed, breaking the momentary silence. Sam holds a low-hanging branch out of your way as you enter the forest.

“Not much further, so don’t worry.” You both trekked through the forest, making it to the edge of the trees when the barn finally came into view. 

The atmosphere was so peaceful, yet terrifying. Sam walking close beside you was a comforting presence. His hand brushed against yours, sending goosebumps all over your body. Your stomach was doing backflips as you looked at him.  

He led you into the barn. You Looked up at the hay bales stacked close to the roof. Your jaw fell open at the sight. “How the hell do you even get up there?” 

“Look, I’ll show you.” Dirt kicked up under his shoes as he jogged over to a singular hay bale on the floor. “You just climb up these, it's basically a staircase.” He jumped to the second one. 

You bobbed over and climbed on top of it, following his lead. “Is this safe?” 

He hesitated. “No.. But I'll make sure you're safe. don't worry, baby,” he teased with a smile. He held out his hand. You took it and he pulled you up to the next hay bale. 

Baby? The name alone made your heart pound out of your chest, or maybe it was the anxiety from the American Ninja Warrior-esque trek up to the top of the hay bails. As you finally made it, you had a straight-shot view of the moon. There were holes in the aluminum panels that gave you a perfect view of the night sky, and only wooden beams supporting the metal that could easily fall on you at any moment.

“You said you come here often, right?” You wanted reassurance that the roof wouldn’t collapse on you and end up another town-wide horror story. He nodded his head as he settled toward the top of the hay, patting the spot next to him. You settle there hesitantly, nervous you’d fall down to your death at any moment.

“Don’t be afraid, you won’t fall,” he said, clearly comforting you. He wrapped his arm around your waist. “If you start falling, I’ll be here to make sure you don’t die or whatever.” He flashed a charming smile your way.

His touch made your mind foggy. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of your waist as you spoke. “What do you and Colby even do when you're here?” 

“We play little kid games, like tag, and run around on the hay bales,” he explained. “Do you remember when I had to wear a fat ass brace to school for like, a week?” 

You nodded. He seemed to be amused that you remembered such a small detail. 

“Yeah, that was ‘cause my ankle got stuck in between these bales. Colby physically couldn't stop laughing at me.” Sam adjusted, scooting closer to you. 

His obvious attempts to remain close to you didn’t go unnoticed. You fidgeted with the hem of your shirt, trying to find something to say to keep talking to him. You couldn’t help but love his voice, especially with him this close to you…

“I always found your voice really comforting, y’know,” you blurted out before you could stop yourself. His eyebrows raised in amusement as he glanced over at you, his teeth grazing his lower lip for a moment.

“Wow, really? People usually say I sound like a squeaky toy.” His joke was emphasized by an accidental voice crack, and his pale face immediately flushed red. You nudge him playfully with your elbow, teasing him.

“Aww, you sound like a 12 year old boy,” you coo.

“Wow, watch me hit puberty all over again,” he joked. “I'm kidding, I hit puberty a long time ago, don't worry.” 

You rolled your eyes as he winked at you. “Thanks for letting me know,” you reply sarcastically. 

“Really, though. I don't know what to say to that,” he admitted, avoiding eye contact with you. You watched intently as he picked at the hay under the two of you. He seemed hesitant, choking on his words. “Y/n, there's something I really need to tell you.” 

You turn back to look at him, your head cocked to the side. You’d never seen him so hesitant, he seemed… insecure, even. You held your lower lip between your teeth for a moment, the tension between the two practically killing you. “Y-yeah…?”

His eyes drifted to somewhere behind you, his brows raising for a moment. He had the chance to get away from this painfully awkward position, realizing he wasn’t quite ready yet. “There’s a… There’s a ladder behind you, we could go to the roof, if you’d like,” he suggested with a coy shrug of his shoulders.

Sam mentally chided himself. He wanted so badly to confess to you, but something about the moment didn’t feel right. Something was off. He scratched the back of his neck nervously as he awaited your answer, looking up at you through his brows. 

“Uhm, okay. Yeah.” Sam stood up and offered his hand to you. You gratefully took it and he pulled you to a standing position. You awkwardly followed him up the ladder to the roof. 

The night was gorgeous. Out in the middle of nowhere, there weren't any lights or noises to interrupt the music of the nighttime. You admired the twinkling stars in the sky that reminded you of Sam's eyes every time he saw you. You couldn't get enough of how he looked at you. 

He stood next to you, staring up at the sky as well. “It’s really nice outside,” he broke the silence, before turning to you. “Come sit with me?” 

You hummed in response. He walked to the edge of the roof and sat down, letting his feet dangle off the ledge. You sat next to him, mirroring his position. You sat dangerously close to him, placing your hand on top of his softly. 

You felt uneasy sitting up there, like you could fall at any moment. You looked down to the ground and tensed up, your hand squeezing Sam’s. He shifted closer to you and moved to wrap his arm around your shoulder, giving you a sense of comfort.

“Don’t worry, only a few people have fallen through or off this roof. Maybe like, 7?” You shove him gently as he tried to scare you, but it earned a hearty laugh from you.

“Alright, alright, no reason to be scared, blah blah…” you trail off as you turn your head, realizing just how close the two of you were. You could feel his warm breath against your face, causing a shudder to run down your spine. 

Sam’s gaze flicked down to your lips momentarily, before meeting your eyes once again. Something was hidden in the pale blue color of his irises, some kind of longing. “There was something I wanted to tell you, y/n,” he whispered, each word he spoke laced with unease and anxiety.

“Just fucking spit it out, Golbach,” you muttered. He was so close, you could hear his uneasy breathing. “Please.”

“I love you, Y/n. God, I knew I'd love you as soon as we spoke for the first time, even if you were mean to me,” he paused, taking a deep breath. 

Sam had been one of those untouchable boys since middle school. All of the girls wanted him, but he had never shown any interest. It was that moment you realized why. 

His bright blue eyes met yours. “Fuck, I've never loved anyone like I love you. You don’t- You don't have to say anything, but I want you to know.” He moved his arm from your shoulder to wrap tightly around your waist. You could feel how badly he was shaking. 

You raise your eyebrows, taking a moment to process everything he had said to you. Your hand trembled slightly as you reached out, brushing his hair away from his eyes gently.

“You mean more to me than you could ever know,” you murmured, “I never… meant to hurt you, Sam, I just taught myself to hate you because I thought you hated me, but in reality… goddamn, I think I love you too.” Your hand moves to cup his cheek, your touch ghosting his skin, feathery almost. 

His shoulders relaxed as soon as you confessed. It was like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders, like he could walk on water. Anything was possible now that he knew: you loved him. He pulled you closer by your waist, his eyes boring holes into you.

“I’ve been waiting so long to hear you say that,” he whispered, his eyes fixed on your lips now, wanting more than anything to lean in closer.

His lips finally met yours. They moved in a sweet, sensual motion. He tasted of vanilla, a surprisingly sweet combination with your minty gum. He moved his hands down to your hips, squeezing gently as he held the kiss for as long as you let him. 

Sam could've kissed you forever. You wrapped your arms around his neck and tangled your fingers in his honey locks. 

You pulled away a moment to catch your breath, but he immediately chased your lips. He was insanely desperate for you, to not lose your touch for even a moment. 

You tug playfully on his golden hair, earning a soft grunt from him. One of his hands moved to the roof beside you to keep himself steady.

He pulled away, breathing heavily. He gazed into your eyes, resting his sweaty forehead against yours. You couldn't help but smile and place a soft peck against his lips. “I love you, Sam. I'm sorry for everything before, I wish I wasn't so stupid.”

“You're not stupid. I’m stupidly in love with you.” He grinned at the cheesy saying. You rolled your eyes with a contradictory smile. 

He took your hand in his, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles slowly. He looked up at the sky, the stars shining beautifully, sure, but they couldn’t compare to you.

“There's Orion's belt.” you pointed out the constellation, a smile on your face. What a dork… he thought to himself. He followed your hand and looked up at the sky once again, finding the constellation easily with your guidance.

“All these stars, yet somehow you shine brighter,” he murmured, as if thinking aloud without realizing. a red hue meets your cheeks as you look back at him, your brows raised.

“Well I'll be damned, he’s a poet,” you teased. He rolled his eyes and scoffed.

“Yeah, yeah, I'm a poet and I didn't even know it or whatever corny shit you’re gonna say next,” he laughed sarcastically.

You lightly slapped his shoulder. “Now I'm the corny one?” 

He rolled his eyes. “I should probably take you home soon, don't want your parents flipping out.”

You let out a sad sigh. “I guess you're right.” 

The venture back to the car was no easier than getting there. Sam helped you down the ladder and off of the hay bales. He interlocked his fingers with yours as you carefully walked out of the barn. 

“When can I see you again?” he asked suddenly. “I mean, I know we have school Monday, but that's still one day I don't get to see you. Do you even know how much I hate that?” 

You giggled. “If I'm not grounded, come over tomorrow. My parents are working, so we'll have the whole house to ourselves.” 

He smirked, “I'm completely okay with that.” 

You slapped his arm again. “Shut up, not like that!”

He shrugged. “Can’t blame a boy for his mind wandering.” 

The drive back to your house was silent as Sam was caught in his own mind. He could see you again tomorrow? And what did tonight mean for the two of you? He wanted to be your boyfriend, more than anything, but he couldn’t be sure that you wanted the same. He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel to the rhythm of the song playing—some old rock song or something.

He parked a few houses down from yours, getting out of the car before you and jogging around to your side to once again open the door for you.

“You are such a gentleman,” you say with a fake posh accent and a clumsy faux-curtsey. You giggle as he shuts the door as quietly as possible, not wanting to raise suspicion from anyone on the street.

He walked you back to your house, his arm around your shoulder, shielding you from the cold.

“You planning on coming in with me or something?” you accused with a quiet laugh under your breath.

“I mean, do you want me to?” 

“Yeah,” you tried to say nonchalantly, but ended up giggling. 

He followed you in through the back door and tiptoed quietly through the house. This was the first time he was really seeing your room. He looked around at your pale walls that were covered with miscellaneous decorations and your messy bed. He couldn't help but smile. He felt like he was looking at your whole life in one small area. To be fair, he was. 

You collapsed onto your bed with a huff. “I am exhausted.” 

“I’ll let you go back to sleep, I'm going to go home.” He walked over and placed a kiss on your forehead. “I love you, y/n.”

“Wait!” You grabbed his hand as he started to walk towards your door. “Stay, please?” 

His face lit up as you grabbed his hand, he turned back to you, kneeling beside your bed. “Do you really want me to stay?” he whispered, his brows quirked.

“Of course I do.” You scoot closer to the wall and pat the spot on your bed beside you. He hesitantly sat down, leaning back against your headboard. He looked up and saw the Napoleon Dynamite poster on your ceiling, which brought a small smile to his lips. 

“I love Napoleon Dynamite,” he said, looking down at you once again. You looked 10 times more comfortable with him sitting beside you. His heart was immediately warmed seeing you grasp onto his sleeve. 

“So do I,” you said in a surprisingly casual tone, considering your stomach was being immediately swarmed with butterflies as he mentioned loving your favorite movie.

Silence filled the room for a moment. He interrupted the silence. “Why are you so far away? c'mere.” 

He opened his arms to you as he laid down in your bed. You wrapped your arms around him, resting your head on his chest. “Y'know, it's so much cozier in here with you.” 

He smiled, placing a kiss on the top of your head. “Everything's better when I'm with you.” 

You felt your heart, which was once pounding against your ribcage as you adjusted to his touch, calming down as you cuddled into his chest. You exhaled softly, feeling your eyelids growing heavier by the moment.

“Goodnight, Golbach,” you teased, finally feeling the warmth of your duvet as he pulled it over the both of you.

“Goodnight, Y/N.” He kissed the top of your head once again. He ran his hand up and down your back, slowly coaxing you into sleep.

~~~~~ collab with @hearts4golbach check out their page!

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for trying to get my friend to stop hanging out with her other friend?

(tw: mentions of eating disorders)

So basically here's some context a few years back we used to have a really tight knit friend group. Alice (friend I want to stop hanging out with her other friend group) and Shera (person in said friend group who is toxic in my opinion).

They were really close friends and a few months down the line we were messing around and decided to jokingly trap her in the spanish homeroom during lunch (we did this with a few other people and now she wanted to see if she could get out in hindsight this was actually extremely irresponsible of us but we were stupid so eh).

Her hand got jammed into the door a few seconds in and once I noticed I backed out and started yelling at Shera to stop and tried pulling her back. I kept screaming that her hand was in the door and I didn't want it to break but she just went 'its fine!' and low and behold the next week she came back with a cast on her arm. I apologized A LOT feeling extremely guilty but Shera was then asking questions like 'are your parents gonna sue me?' 'my moms gonna be pissed if i get sued' 'oh god im so stressed' before even CHECKING on Alice

I calmly mentioned to her that we probably won't get sued and if we did we would deserve it and Shera was still paranoid about that. Alice then said that her mom isn't the type to sue people so she's fine and then Shera made a halfhearted apology to her before laughing it off as a joke.

A few months later and we get into another argument. Alice mentions that she's underweight and has a severe eating disorder that does effect with her life and mental health to which Shera responds with 'its better than being fat' and 'i would rather have an eating disorder than being fat'

We then try to talk her out of it and she keeps saying how Alice is just being stupidly insecure when she shouldn't be and saying how she's instead complimenting her for being skinny. I get mad at her and tell her to just leave and she does.

Next year comes around and she acts like nothing bad has happened. She rejoins the friend group but Alice left because of her. Then when asked about the situation regarding her hand she just says 'yeah that was really funny' and 'it wasnt my fault' then she'll start accusing us of being overdramatic and that it wasn't that much of a big deal (keep in mind we accidentally BROKE her arm).

Anyways soon later we kick her out and I join Alice's current friend group because my other one got wonky. Then some lunch days she disappears and we saw her hanging out with Shera again. I get kinda pissed at this because she's the reason why Alice left and our entire friend group agrees

Whenever we ask her about it she shrugs it off or gets snappy with us. I've also actively tried talking her out of it saying that 'Shera isnt a good person' but whenever I try she just snaps at me and tells me that its her choice.

I'm starting to feel like an asshole for trying to get her to stop. Our entire friend group has tried talking her out of it as they've also had past history with Shera, but it doesn't work. She gets mad at us and we've stopped with it and laid low. I know that Alice is her own person but its kinda the situation where if you know your friend is hanging out with a bad person wouldn't you try to stop them?

I just don't want her getting hurt again but I also don't want to come off as controlling over her.

Anyways AITA for not trying to get her to stop hanging out with her other friend?

What are these acronyms?

[breadmate500]

The letter (part four)

Dipper,

I read your letter. I guess all I can say is thank you. My mom and dad don’t know what to do without our mansion. They’ve never been in the… middle class. I’m looking forward to it though, I mean I get to be a normal kid for once. My friends dropped me. Turns out they were sucking up to me because I had money. Without the money I’m just…average.

Ugh, it sounds awful in writting. It’s going to be a lot to get used to. And hey- thanks for telling me about lazy Susan looking for employees. Maybe I’ll talk to her. (If I’m being honest, I’m kinda scared of her. I mean am I allowed to look at her lazy eye? Should I just look at one eye? Ignore it completely? I don’t know!)

I hope I get to see you and Mabel soon. I mean- you’re kinda my only friends now. Oh my god. I sound pathetic. Then again I am writing to a middle class dork who lived in a shack all summer. (Hopefully you got the reference from your letter) I guess I’m kind of friends with Wendy, Candy, and Grenda now.

Wendy seems pretty cool. You must’ve liked her a lot to give her your hat. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you not wear that pine tree hat- hey didn’t bill call you pine tree? Ugh, never mind I’d rather not think about Weirdmagedon right now. I mean I wore a potato sack for a week.

As for Candy and Grenda they’re definitely… weird. That’s not a bad thing it’s just…different. (Which also isn’t a bad thing) I was raised on a mother who needed me to be perfect who told me different was bad. I’m trying to learn how to be my own person now. And you and Mabel were…are- a big influence on me.

Oh yeah, I should probably mention.

Wendy saw you give me the letter and then Candy and Grenda over heard and yeah- now they know about it. Eh, it’s whatever really. Just some letter. Although they did to jump to some…interesting conclusions. But we’re friends now! Even after all the horrible stuff I said and did to you and your sister you two are still willing to be my friends. Or at least be friendly. I know you still secretly hate me. Thanks again for writting this letter Dipper. It made me feel a lot better. See you soon.

Signed,

Pacifica

P.S (I got like fifty hand cramps writing this stupid letter. Next time just ask for my phone number. You are technically a teen now. Don’t you have one? Wait- more importantly do you even know how to use one? Eh, I’ll talk to Mabel. See you next summer)

[orphicrose]

I love love love your recent fic so amazing!! Just kinda got me thinking what about Sean x best friend reader, two peas in a pot, made for each other bur also kinda complete opposites. I think about "till the end of the line" from the musical the theory of relativity. When separated the two of them are complete opposites but when together they have the best time etc. And Sean meeting the reader randomly, maybe because he heard someone use the reader's last name and it's just a really unique lastname so he kinda knew it was his best friend. And obviously he bring his friend back to camp. The reader would be really smart and maybe actually a good shot but rather quiet and always stand behind Sean in any social interaction. Thinking about "excuse me he asked for no pickels"

Anyway, i hope you can understand what i mean, have a great day

Brothers in Arms (Sean x Male!Reader)

W/C: 1.4K

Summary: Sean and reader are platonic soulmates, meeting after sean gets lost. He returns the favor when Y/n is kidnapped by the pinkertons.

Note: This is very short, and I honestly didn't have a straight idea for this one since I've never written for Sean before. But i tried my best! I do apologies if its nothing that you had in mind.

----------------------------------------------

"A lively one you are, eh?" A soft chuckle echoed next to him. Guns out at the ready as they hid in an alley. Away from the law. "Shut up" Y/n bit back at the firey Irishman.

The annoying man was about to open his gob again before y/n slapped a hand over it, steadying their breathing as a police officer walked passed. A sigh of relief left y/n's lips as they went unnoticed.

"If we are going to make it out alive, you are going to need to be quiet, yeah?" Sean nodded in response, pulling y/n's hand away from his mouth.

They made their escape, running from the alley through the streets of blackwater. Making their way to the horses hitched up to a lamppost, and rode like their lives depended on it. Because it did.

"What's you're name then?" Seans voice echoed over the hooves hitting the ground.

"Y/n! I'm taking it you're name is Sean?" He shouted back

"How did you know?" Sean chuckled as he caught up to him.

"Because the Butcher you were robbing from seemed to think you were a regular in there. Did your parents never tell you not to rob the same place twice?"

Their horses began to slow to a trot as they got further away from the area, coming up to tall trees now.

"Did your parents never tell you not to interfere with someone elses robbery?" Sean's horse bumped into y/n's.

"You were doing a poor job. Someone had to help you." The two laughed, finally lightening up from the mess they left a mile behind them. "Where are we going anyhow?"

"My temporary camp at this abandoned shack i found. It's not far." The reins on Sean's horse were raised, and smacked back down. Picking up the pace again, but only lasting for a few minutes before he halted abruptly outside a small wooden home.

"Temporary?" Y/n continued the conversation, now dismounting the horse and hitching it up to a tree.

"Lost me posse. Don't ask me how, but I know they are around here somewhere." He opened the door of his home and invited the man in, sitting himself down on the only chair in the building.

"Uh huh"

"So for now, I'm stuck ere. " Sean motioned around him, pulling out his gun and inspecting it closely. A shot of spit came from his mouth, as he used it to clean his gun with his sleeve. "If you help me find them, I'll reward yous"

"What? With meat that I just helped you steal?"

"No no no, you could join us. We need the numbers"

Y/n scoffed, leaning against a table. "Yeah, we will see."

"So you'll help?"

It wasn't hard to find them. They were a pretty large group, camped out in the middle of New Austin. Y/n found it quite funny as to how much Sean struggled. Their friendship grew rather fast, just clicking. Almost the same person split into two bodies. Dutch was hesitant to let him join, only because he didn't know how he could function with another Sean. But he allowed it. And everyone ended up adoring y/n. They are only an issue when they are actively with the Irishman.

Months passed after Sean was successfully reunited with the Van Der Linde's. But a boat heist in Blackwater split everyone up again. The gang making their way to colter, leaving Sean in the custody of the pinkertons. And y/n? No one knew where they managed to crawl off to. No one even knew if they survived the raid.

Dutch's survivors eventually made their way to horse-shoe overlook. A cozy little spot along the valentine cliff side, overlooking the streams and grassland. Finally on their feet enough to win Sean back, literally. Fighting head on with the detective agency, a risky task to follow through with. But they were successful, somehow. And Sean was back, safe and sound with his friends. Except one. The irishman refused to celebrate their small victory, till y/n was found.

"We don't even know if he survived sean" Arthurs voice raised to an annoyed tone. Not ever hearing the end of it.

"And if he is, we are just gonna leave him? What if hes hurt, huh?" Sean was reloading his rifle, and gathering a group of his things. Ready for the journey ahead. "Yous risked your life for me, why am i not allowed to do the same?"

Arthur remained quiet, looking at his feet and sighing. Then moving out the way of him. "Fina..." He grumbled. "But you're not going by yourself..."

"Why not?" "Because you'll get yourself killed" Arthur hoisted himself onto his brawny horse. "Charles! Lenny! We got something we need to do" He called out, the two men responding rather fast.

Sean felt a weight lifting off his shoulders as they all mounted their horses. The two agreeing to the task at hand. Clearly bored of lazing about camp for a while.

The group of four trailed their way along the coast of West Elizabeth. When it was clear of bounty hunters, they crossed. Caution with every trot. Sean led them deep into tall trees, confusing the group.

"Blackwaters that way" Lenny pointed East, Charles giving him a look of 'i don't know'.

"If he's alive, there is one place he will be" Sean's voice was the most serious he had ever been. Coming up to a small cabin isolated by a beautiful lake, surrounded by a blanket of leaves and sheltered trees.

"Y/n!" Sean repeated, jumping from the stallion and busting into the home, shoulder first. The other men heard laughter following the loud bang. "I knew it! Yous owe me!" They heard from inside.

"We saved your life, I think that's enough boy" Arthur shook his head, finding the enthusiastic Sean holding Y/n in a tight embrace. Y/n wincing in pain as his arms suffocated him.

"C'mon Sean, you're hurting him" Arthur pulled him away, surveying the injured man. "Y'alright, y/n?"

He nodded, gripping at his leg.

The group dragged the injured y/n back to camp, returning to a very warm welcome and open arms. Patting him on the back as he hobbled over to the medical cart.

"What did they do to ya?" Sean was rushing up behind y/n, chasing for answers.

Y/n winced as he perched on a barel, Susan tending to the gaping wound on his leg. "The same thing that happened to you, looking at the gaps in your teeth" Y/n managed to sneak out a forced laugh, pointing at his mouth. Sean scoffed and folded his arms.

"Leave me teeth alone you bastard" He took a seat next to his friend, smacking his leg to cause him some pain.

"We missed ya here"

"You mean you missed me here?"

A few days had passed since the safe return of y/n, and they seemed to become a lot more talkative with the other members of the group. More friendly. They had always kept to themselves, other than with Sean. But the near death experience, and the group risking their lives for him, gave him a new respect for his new family. A new sense of confidence that his life had meaning to others as well as him.

"Hows ya gammy leg?" Sean playfully pocked the barrel of his shotgun into y/n's back, unloaded of course. Y/n swatted at him, and turned back to his view of the muddy lake in front of their camp.

"Better, I can walk just fine now"

"Good, good" Sean took in the same view before speaking again. "Cause Mary-Beth has a coach tip.."

"There it is" Y/n throws an accusing look towards him.

"Theres what?" "The thing that you want from me"

"I just think getting out would be good for you!" Sean put his arms up in defence.

"Yeahh yeah, getting out and helping your sorry arse." Y/n struggled a little to find his way to his feet.

"C'mon gammy leg. You're such a better shot than me"

"I didn't say no, did i?"

[deathmetalangel]

Heya! 😶‍🌫

I have an idea for a request... I mean-

What about a fic about a love triangle between Marshall Lee and Fiona (from adventure time) fighting over a fem!reader that's just a sweetheart and kinda energetic but is just hella hot when she fights.

(+bonus if you add the three of them getting in a poly-relationship at the end of all 👀)

Feel free to ignore this request tho- It's just that this is the first time I see someone willing to write for adventure time :'D

PD: -hands Envy a flower- this is for you, it's an award for your amazing work 🌷😌

SWEET LIKE SUGAR CANDY (FIONA X FEM! READER X MARSHALL LEE)

warnings: just polygamy which isn’t much of a warning, oh and some violence

the choice between two suitors

tysm!! it means a lot to me honest. i’m glad you like my work :3 i love adventure time so it’s nothing! it’s one of my fav shows. also i had a lot of trouble writing the ending srry

Normally Prince Bubblegums castle was boring and going over there was only fun if you wanted to annoy the uptight monarch. However, Marshall Lee knew y/n was going to be over there for some council meeting for her kingdom so how could he skip out on that. He needed to spend as much time with her as possible, especially when Fionna would be there as well.

Fionna was his “rival” as of now. Only because it was obvious just how bad she had it for y/n. She was always so nice to everyone it’s obvious why Fiona would like her, but still. Marshall was dead set on charming the girl. Even though Gumball begged the vampire to not “corrupt the mind of his general”. Pfft. As if he, okay he did understand that point of view. However, the sweetest and most badass fighter in the kingdom with the coolest and most handsomest vampire in the Nightosphere would obviously be the best couple.

So Marshall got all ready for the meeting and when he arrived both the Prince and General were waiting for everyone. "Why hello y/n, may I say you look exceedingly dangerous and deadly for this council meeting." Her cheeks turn a soft pink while Bubblegum rolls his eyes, she was so easily smitten.

"Good evening Marshall, why thank you. You look exceptionally lethal as well. I wasn't expecting you to show up to this meeting however, what changed you mind?"

"Eh you know, how could I pass up seeing your pretty face." She giggles as more guests start to arrive. He was always one to flatter. It was like second nature to him by now. Marshall Lee was nothing if not charming.

Before he can speak he gets interrupted by a familiar blonde. "Hi y/n! You ready for this meeting?" Fionna smiles at y/n who returns the look.

"Of course. What kind of General would I be if I wasn't always up to date on the affairs of my armies and the people they protect." She was always so noble. So good. Maybe that's why they both showed interest in her. Fionna was the epitome of a good person, and that obviously drew her in.

However, Marshall was not a good person. No matter how you spun it he was selfish and did things for his own gain rather than the good of everyone else. Y/n was selfless. The opposite of him. So in some ways Gumball was right, but he wouldn't let that stop him. "Shall we all gather inside then." Gumball says to catch everyone's attention.

All of the attendees follow the two candy people into the royal meeting room where Gumball sits at the head of table with y/n on his right side and a banana guard on his left. Marshall quickly rushes to take the seat next to y/n before Fionna can take it. And when he does the girl blushes almost furiously.

With a triumphant smirk Marshall sits down and waits for Prince Gumball to start the meeting. "As you know there have been a series of attacks on the outer perimeter of the kingdom especially near the southeastern perimeter. Y/n has scoped out the area and we have reason to believe it's thieves that are attempting to steal royal artifacts. I called you here to assemble a team to take them out for good."

Many people look around the room to try and guess who will volunteer or be volunteered. "I have drafted a select group, and I hope there is no protest with the fighters I have picked. Y/n will lead one troop of banana soldiers and accompanying her will be Fionna, Cake, Marshall Lee, and I will allow y/n to bring Lord Monochromicorn. Sound good?"

Of course y/n nods her head dutifully while the rest of them accept the job. "You should go at once. Y/n has packed all the necessary supplies and Lord is waiting for her and Fionna outside. Please let me know if there is anything else you need." Marshall may think of Pg as snobby, but he still was a pretty good leader.

The assigned group follows their pseudo leader to the garden where Lord Monochromicorn was waiting with an unreadable face. He stomps his foot on the ground noticing y/n approach. "Yep. We're all set Lord. You ready?" The stallion stomps his hoof in agreement.

"Great! Come on Fiona and put Cake on too." Fionna looks back at Marshall with a smirk. She was so winning the general over. Marshall huffs under his breath. Stupid show off. Y/n simply starts to have Lord Monochromicorn take flight, not noticing their silly antics.

Fionna looks back towards Marshall before starting to talk to y/n, she just knew how much this bothered him. "So uh y/n what exactly are we facing here."

"Hmm? I think it's just some bandits, but we don't know what magical artifacts they have already stolen so we must remain vigilant. Wouldn't want anyone getting hurt after all." She smiles as Monochromicorn starts to lower and get closer to the ground.

Immediately arrows start to shoot at the group when they start to land. “Those jerks. They won’t even give us a chance to land. Lord just avoid as best as you can.” He nods at the generals orders and dodges the projectiles. “Marshall Lee can you take out the shooting squad?” The vampire nods and makes quick work of the losers carrying bows and arrows.

“Yo y/n those guys are barely a threat! This is kinda fun!” The girl nods before unsheathing her sword and grabbing her shield. She stands up making Fionna and Cake confused, before either of them can say anything the girl just lets herself fall backwards towards the oncoming battle.

“Y/N!” Fionna shouts out watching the general flip through the air. When she lands on the ground her normally sweet face is dead serious.

She points her sword out towards the army waiting to fight. “You have threatened my kingdom and home, for that I must beat you to a pulp.” The bandits look at one another confused until the one woman army bounds forward clutching her sword with insane determination.

Fionna and Cake hurry after her when the banana guards start to arrive. Y/n fights off the attackers almost three at a time. Each one failing against her skill with her blade. Fionna watches in awe at how fluid her movements were until Cake had to save her from a sneak attack. “I think you’d be better off watching your own back instead of hers.”

Marshall leaves a trail of knocked out bandits behind him as he makes his way towards y/n, he’d be damned if she didn’t see how well he fought. “Marshall! Air support?” She calls out when she notices his presence. The immortal smirks before flying over to her and lifting her by her hand.

“Beautiful time to fly huh gorgeous?” Her face burns red before she promptly lets go and drops herself onto a handful of fighters using her shield to cushion the landing. “Damn she’s hot.” Marshall mumbles under his breath before helping her take out the rest of the bandits.

“Hey general! I think this is what they stole!” Fi shouts out from the other side of the field holding up a bag filled with gems and other objects. Y/n walks over while putting her weapons back to where they normally sit. She nods at Fionna and takes the bag.

“Perfect. This is exactly what we had lost in our outposts. Why Pg had artifacts in the outposts beyond me.”

“So what now?” Fionna asks aloud as Lord Monochromicorn soon joins them.

“We go home? I mean I can whip us up some food or something when we get back to celebrate if you want.” She smiles at the three before the incoming argument.

“Y/n I love you!” Marshall slowly turns towards Fionna who covers her mouth from her outburst.

“You sneaky little witch! I was gonna ask her out and here you go ruining stuff!”

The two continue to bicker while Cake, Lord Monochromicorn, and y/n all watch in stunned silence. “Uh Cake did you have any clue about this?” Cake nods. “So why didn’t you tell me?”

“I didn’t think the two dummy’s would fight right in front of you.” Cake’s insult finally catches their attention.

Marshall pushes Fionna to the side and rushes towards y/n. “What do you say y/n? You, me, dinner? Maybe even a concert?”

Fionna bumps him out of the way in return. “Nuh uh! Y/n! We can sharpen our swords and then go on an adventure together!”

Y/n stands there when they start trying to push one another out of the way. “Ahem.” She clears her throat to shut them up. “I’m going to be honest, Marshall Lee I was interested in you since we met at Lumpy Space Prince’s party, but I was also interested in Fionna when we started going t battle together.”

Both potential suitors watch nervously waiting for her to choose. “Gah I just can’t pick! You both are so amazing! Why do I have to choose!”

“If that’s what you want princess.” Marshall Lee smiles at her and grabs her hand.

“I mean I guess I don’t mind sharing with Marshall.” Fionna mumbles.

“Wait huh. Really?” Y/n questions still not believing. Both of them nod. Y/n lights up and smiles. “That’s perfect! Now can I still make some lunch?”

[queenlua]

continuing in the series of "lua dashes off some cringey writerly shop-talk before going to her real job":

i currently find myself in a position where (i think) i need to write a chapter comprised of a series of shorter scenes, from alternating PoVs, to quickly cover a span of time & give a sense of narrative thrust to those two PoVs.

it's very movie montage vibes, right? like the two PoVs end up in the same physical place at the end of the series of scenes. (and yeah, it's probably Net Bad that i'm thinking in terms of movie stuff for this long piece of narrative prose, but, eh, this is a kinda pulpy WIP to begin with, so i'm fine with this not being High Art™, i just want it to be solid & effective at what it's doing)

anyway. i've been struggling a bit writing this sequence! i think this is partially because, pacing-wise, it differs from what came before it (this WIP has had relatively consistent chapter/scene lengths—not due to conscious choice on my part, just, seems to be the comfortable pace for telling the story i want to tell), so maybe i just need to crib harder off of an example of someone who knows what they're doing? (i have one sequence from the Terra Ignota books in mind i'm planning to reread, but pretty short on ideas otherwise—if you know some examples, please lay 'em on me, i got library access etc etc)

it's also possible the idea of "stuff a larger number of shorter scenes in this chapter to cover a lot of ground quickly" is a categorically bad idea (or at least a bad idea in this instance lol) in which case uhhh i should rethink this. maybe i should just dip out to some sort of third-person-omniscient more tell-y sort of summary? convey the same information with fewer scenes (e.g. just zip closer to the "end" of the sequence and cover any information missed in the gap by implying stuff that happened rather than showing it out? seems like that'd miss a lot of the emotional thrust but hm maybe)? slow down and realize this sequence needs to be spun out more (i am almost certain this is not the answer—i really don't think this needs more length, for a variety of reasons—but bla bla thinking aloud)? anyway yeah i know this is a vague description of the dilemma, lol, but feel free to toss out your own half-baked hypotheses for What You Would Try & i will ponder them while i commute

[kristannafever]

Second Chances - 9

Kristanna Modern AU Rated: Explicit WC: 2021

Chapter Index

----------------

“This is happening!” Anna squealed. 

Kristoff laughed.  “It is!”

“I can’t wait,” she said, hugging him around the neck and pulling him in for a kiss.

He basked in the warmth of her kiss and the glow of her happiness.  It had only taken about two weeks for them to plan the entire wedding, and in one short month, they were going to be wed.

“And I’m glad that works for our sisters to take time off to fly home,” she said, pulling out of his embrace and going back to her laptop where she had just finished booking the venue. 

Kristoff was too.  It was a worry when they brought it up with their sisters that they would find work too demanding for the short time frame, but as luck would have it, they were both able to make the trip and take an extra couple of days beforehand to help them prepare. 

-----

They picked a Ranchers Hall in a small rural town about a half hour outside of the city.   It was perfect for Anna’s vision of a country winter wedding.  And while the place was rather small, it didn’t matter since the only people they were inviting were family and only the closest of friends.  All in all, about forty guests.

His sister and Anna’s sister were going to serve as the best person and maid of honor, and it was decided by Kristoff (and greatly appreciated by Anna) that his parents were going to walk with both him and then Anna down the aisle.  As soon as the ceremony was complete, they were going to do some family photos outside while the venue changed the rows of chairs out for tables and started the bar and serving guests.

The flowers Anna chose were white roses because they symbolized the purity of their love and the new beginnings they were having at life with each other. 

The meal they decided on was either prime rib or salmon as per the guest’s choice, and the caterer they had booked also offered appetizers for the cocktail hour and late-night pizza and popcorn for inebriated party goers.  Kristoff thought it would be a good idea to personally pay for the pre-dinner drinks and then charge a toonie bar afterward and to offer pre-paid cab vouchers to anyone who didn’t want to stay in the town’s small hotel so there was no worry of anyone drinking and driving.

Anna had argued briefly with him about the cost of the wedding as he was handling it all, which turned into a rather deep conversation about how he’d lived with his ex.  He told Anna the sad truth that they never really did anything.  They never even went on a vacation together.  Not that he didn’t want to.  It was all his ex.  She had a group of friends from high school she was still extremely close with, and her vacation time was spent solely with them.  At the beginning he didn’t mind too much, thinking it would be nice to have those quiet weeks here and there to himself, then time went on and when he’d brought up her using her time to go somewhere with him, her reaction had been reluctance and confusion; since they lived together already, why would she give up these trips with her friends to spent more time with him.   So she kept taking vacations with her group and Kristoff saved a ton of money over the years for not going anywhere. 

Upon hearing about this, Anna’s face went deep scarlet and she sat there with her teeth clenched frowning at him.

“You know,” she started, “I have a lot of things in my mind that I could say about that, that I want to say about that, then I think of where we are now, how I don’t want to spend another second of my life without you by my side, and I realize that it doesn’t really matter, does it?”

Kristoff shook his head.  “Nope.”

Anna sighed, letting go of her anger.  “I will never not appreciate the second chance at love that I got to have with you, Kristoff.  You are my soulmate and I love you more than anything.”

“I love you too.”  He leaned in and kissed her, then pulled his head back and arched an eyebrow.  “That got you kinda mad eh?”

She nodded.  “A little, I guess.  I just don’t like hearing about you getting mistreated.”

“Well, same here, but you know that.”  He smirked at her.  “Care to take out any pent-up aggression on me?”

Anna’s eyes lit up.  “What do you have in mind?”

He put his mouth close to her ear.  “Why don’t you fuck my brains out?”

Anna shuddered.  “How would I do that exactly?”

He shrugged.  “Use your imagination.  My body is your playground.”

She smiled at him wickedly.  “Damn right it is.”  Then she kissed him forcefully.

They began to undress each other when Anna interrupted told him she wanted to go to the bedroom.  Shedding the remainder of their clothes as they went down the hall, they arrived in their room fully naked and attached at the lips. 

Kristoff pressed her down onto the bed, crawled over her, and began kissing his way down her body.  She smiled.  She would definitely have her way with his body as she saw fit, but she was not about to deny the pleasure that his mouth gave her. 

She curled her fingers into his impossibly soft hair, moaning loudly as his tongue lashed out against her clit.  Her back arched as he worked his mouth, and while she was enjoying the hell out of it, she grew impatient to have him.

When she gently tugged his hair, he stopped and looked up at her.  “I need you now,” she whispered.

“How do you want me?” he asked, sitting up.

“On your back.”

Anna moved and he took her place, laying down in the middle of the mattress.  She crawled over him and took a moment to kiss him passionately before she started. 

Moving slowly, she slid down onto his cock with a passionate and somewhat desperate moan.  It amazed her how she seemed to forget in between the moments they were not making love how good it actually felt to have him inside of her.  There was nothing in the world she could compare it with. 

She moved against him, already so close from his mouth, it didn’t take long before Anna felt the pull towards letting go.  Only, this time, she stopped, and her arousal pulsed briefly before quieting down. 

“Fuck, you have no idea how much that makes me crazy,” Kristoff muttered as he caressed her hips.   

She looked down at his face, careful not to move her hips just yet.  “Yeah?”

He nodded slowly.  “It’s…” He let out a long breath.  “It just feels incredible.  Do it again.”

Anna gave him a wicked smile.  “You read my mind.”

She began to move herself against him, slowly at first, then picking up her pace a bit until that feeling came back.  She stopped again, just one more movement away from going too far, and her center quivered against his cock.

“Fuck…” he said slowly. 

Anna held stark still.  If she moved right then, she was going to come and she didn’t want to just yet.  She waited until her arousal died down, then finally relaxed her body against him. 

“I have to be honest, Anna,” Kristoff said, his hands massaging her thighs, “I don’t think I will be able to last you doing that again.”

She smiled at him.  “Does you in that much, huh?”

“You have no idea,” he mumbled, curling his hands around her back and pulling her down for a kiss. 

Anna gave in to his lips, kissing him back and starting to move herself against him.  She went slow this time, allowing herself to feel every second of her renewed growing arousal.  She pulled back from his lips and braced her hands on his chest as she got closer.  She had never felt such a deep need for an orgasm in all her life.

Kristoff’s grip was tightening on her hips and she knew he was going to come as soon as she did.  Anna found that edge again, only this time she did not deny herself.  She gasped as it got closer, and then a second later she was crying out with sweet relief.

Kristoff cried out softly with her, holding her firmly to him as they climaxed together.  It felt amazing to Anna to be able to ride out her orgasm with his cock pulsing powerfully within her.  It was basically mind-melting pleasure.  It was no wonder she was hooked on it like a drug.  A drug she was so thoroughly addicted to, that she knew they would have sex at least one more time before the end of the day. 

Or maybe two or three.  There seemed to be no way to satiate their hunger for one another.

~   ~   ~   ~   ~

Their wedding day was stunningly perfect.

Everything went according to plan and the only hiccup of the entire day was when Anna realized she accidently left her precious jewellery – the pieces she got back from her shitty ex – at home.  It was rectified shortly by Kristoff’s parents driving into the city to fetch them while the wedding party got ready.

What followed was flawless.

At the end of the night, with only a few guests left snacking on the pizza and the popcorn and talking in groups, Anna looked over at Kristoff, the happy and slightly drunk smile on his face, and felt her heart nearly explode with love. 

He was talking to Chester and his parents and laughing about something.  Anna could not take her eyes off of him; the most stunning man on the face of the planet in his pressed suit pants and white button down with the tie gone, top buttons undone, and his sleeves rolled up to his elbows.  His hair was mussed from dancing all night, his brown eyes shinning so brightly with life, his smirk of a smile on full display.  Truly, he was nothing but complete perfection in Anna’s eyes.  The sexiest man on the face of the planet.

He happened to glance her way, catching her staring at him, and he turned towards her and smiled.  They walked towards each other and straight into a tight embrace. 

“I can’t believe you are my wife,” he mused, kissing her neck. 

“God, I can’t believe you are my freaking husband!” Anna said back excitedly.  She pulled back to look at his face.  “And now we get to have a whole hell of a lot of fun making some children.”

“You bet your ass we do,” he breathed, and kissed her. 

-----

About an hour later, Kristoff was pushing himself into her. 

The foreplay was only a couple of sloppy drunk kisses before Anna was begging for him.  It didn’t matter to her, her only goal for the night was for him to come inside of her.  She’d had her IUD removed a couple of weeks ago and in the interim before the wedding, he’d worn protection.  Anna much preferred the feeling of his naked skin without the rubber barrier.    

“I can’t wait for tomorrow,” he said between kisses.  “I am so excited to take a real vacation.  With my wife!”

“Me too,” Anna said through a sigh.  “Oh, Kristoff, me too.”

He took the hint that she didn’t want to talk too much and pressed his pelvis flush with hers.  He knew exactly what he was doing, and even through all the drinks, Anna knew she was going to come and that he was holding out to join her. 

She let go of every thought besides the building feeling in her abdomen.  It grew until it reached the point where Anna’s mind went utterly blank, then she reached the edge and fell over it.  They moaned, holding each other through every strong contraction of their shared orgasm.

---

Previous Chapter

[re-re-redline]

—Hypothetical Dialogue: Mehmed II—

No spoilers for… anything really.

Foreword: Well, I can safely say that this definitely wasn’t in my to-do list. I was having a lot of trouble outlining his RHC and I decided on a whim to try my hand at this for a change of pace which leads us to here!

I have written his ascension lines, his bond lines, his conversation lines along with a few character interaction lines, the birthday line annnnnnd…his Bond 10 line. You know…the Arcade exclusive bond level 10 line. Onore Arcaido This is much shorter than most of the things I’ve written, which is kinda watering my wheels but voicelines aren’t supposed to be beefy, so that is a plus I suppose.

That in mind, I do hope you enjoy this unforeseen post.

Summoning:

“Hahaha! Do I really need an introduction? You already—eh? It’s customary? Ah, fine. Servant class: Archer! I am sultan Mehmed II, but you may know me best as the Father of Conquest or as The Conquerer. I have answered your summons, and from this day forward I shall aid you in achieving your dreams.”

1st Ascension:

“Whew… While I do enjoy clothing from the modern era, I do feel as though this is a better fit for me as a whole. After all, that outfit doesn’t exactly scream ‘sultan’ does it? But you should know that this attire is not for combat. That will be for later. So don’t hold back on those materials, Master!”

2nd Ascension:

“Eh? If not for battle then what is this—pah! Administrative affairs, of course. What? Did you think that all I did was fighting? Ugh, I suppose I should have seen that coming with my title… I did not only wage war in my day, Master, I spent a great deal of time reforming and strengthening the system. Laws, government, education—all of those strides were made under my rule and the results were a much more manageable empire for my son and his sons after. So don’t forget that I was not only an excellent military strategist, but an exemplary ruler as well!”

3rd Ascension:

“Ah… That day… Hehehe… Hm? Oh, my bad. I forgot you were standing there, Master. It’s just that this armor invokes a rather strong sense of nostalgia that nearly swallowed me whole! …Ahem, this is what I wore when I conquered Kostantiniyye, and I remember that day as though it were only a mere hour in the past. It was the best day of my life, and the beginning of my path to greatness.”

Final Ascension:

“…But on that day, something ended. I do not regret putting it to rest, but at the time I had thought that I could keep it alive if I gave it everything I had. It didn’t work, obviously, and to many across the world I was spitting on its grave by giving myself that title and acting that way. In truth, I was showing my reverence and my love in one of the only ways I knew how at the time. Of course, none of her former states acknowledged my new title or my efforts and their resentment of me and my empire grew tenfold. But that didn’t matter, none of that mattered. Because I had her, sweet Kostantiniyye… My childhood dream.”

Bond 1:

“When I had heard that the world had ended and that the one who was calling me was to be the one to save it, I had expected you to be…much more serious. This is a situation far more grave than anything I had ever been through, yet here you stand before me with that jovial mien about you. Honestly, I’m not sure what to make of you, Master.”

Bond 2:

“The more I look at you, the more intriguing you are. That plain appearance belies something far more than the sum of its parts and I have full intentions to figure out just what that is. So don’t you dare go calling me some kind of creep for observing you, okay? If we are to work closely together like this, then I should have a firm grip on who you are as a person. And I implore you to apply the same amount of scrutiny to me as well. It wouldn’t be fair otherwise.”

Bond 3:

“Hm? I act strangely too? Ah…well. I’m not exactly running my empire right now, so I find that there isn’t a need to behave so stiffly. Plus this place is chock full of people with my level of fame and prestige who behave much worse than I do. …It’s not a bad thing? Hah, you and I are in the minority on that front. My father… Ugh, you know what? Forget him. That man is not here and even if he were, I answer to you now. That’s what matters.”

Bond 4:

“Jovial mien…what a joke. You’re exhausted beyond belief, you’re sore down to the marrow in your bones, you might just be at your wit’s end and yet here you stand before me with a determination to stand solely on your own two legs. It’s ridiculous. …Don’t give me that look. Who better to recognize the signs better than me? I am The Father of Conquest, I know everything there is to know. But I digress. As tribute to the Ottoman Empire, I order you to go to bed! I will take care of any administrative affairs that are on or will come to your desk. Yes, I’m serious. Now go.”

Bond 5:

“…So you have seen me in my entirety too, have you not? …It’s alright. I’m not angry about it. In fact, I think it’s a good thing that you know now. Such close relations between two people should seldom hold secrets, after all. Which is why… I think I’ll be forward in saying that I will not leave you be. No matter what happens, who you become or what the world makes of you, know that I will stand at your side proudly. …Why? Is it not obvious? You, Master, are but a reflection of myself and I can’t help but feel as though I must take responsibility for that. This obligation thrust upon you has been your life for so long and, well, chances are that you will die doing this. Just as I did in my time. You will look back and wonder if you have wasted your life, wonder what could have been if you were a normal person. But that is if you die here. Which I will not allow. You will see your journey end and you will enjoy the fruits of your labor in peace. That… That is a promise. One I will uphold even if it should kill me in the process.”

Bond 5 (Post Event Clear):

“So this is the agony of losing an empire… I regret nothing. What I did was not only righteous, but it was the fulfillment of my destiny. It just so happened that Kōnstantînos was on the receiving end of such things. This isn’t to say that I hold no sympathy. As a fellow human under the same sun, I… No. I’ll save it for when him and I finally have an honest conversation. …Master, keep an eye on Kōnstantînos. Closure is not equivalent to healing, it is the beginning. With this having happened, he will need all of the time and support he can get. The road will be long and while Kōnstantînos has it in him to move forward, he needs someone who will keep him on the right track. There will come a time when he will not be able to discern which way is forward or backward, that is when you show him the way. Such is your duty as his master, and more importantly, his friend.”

Conversation 1:

“Your to-do list, bring it here. Eh? You don’t have one? You just remember… No. Absolutely not. Sit down and list off everything you have to do today, tomorrow and every day after. Organization is of utmost importance and I will not have my master be a scatterbrained fool who completes their obligations whenever they feel like it!”

Conversation 2:

“My relationship with you? Oh-hoh, no need to be so coy! You can simply confess your feelings for me without the pretense, I will allow… That’s not what you meant? Ah. Ahhh… The Master-Servant relationship… Well. I am one of the greatest men to have existed and you are the Last Master of Humanity, so we are close to being equals but not quite there. My experience and wisdom place me slightly above you. So I expect you to treat me as a mentor of sorts.”

Conversation 3:

“You really do ask whatever comes to mind, don’t you? Hmph, if this were back in my day I’d have you severely punished for having the audacity to ask such a personal question. Which is why you should be thankful that I am willing to give you the key to answering it instead. Master, if you truly wish to know what I think of you… Then look at me. Very, very hard and for a long, long time. Once that is done, ruminate on what you have seen. This is observation, the essence of finding the truth.”

Conversation 4 (If you have Kōnstantînos XI):

“Is that…? It really is. Emperor Kōnstantînos XI, it’s a pleasure to be—wah! Hey, hey, hey! Put the sword away! I’m not here for…eh? I’m a bad influence on Master? Whaaaaaat? If anyone’s a bad influence on Master, it’s that godawful vampire!

Conversation 5 (If you have Kōnstantînos XI and Bond Level 5):

“…Has he left? Good. *Sigh* I know that I’m practically responsible for his death, but you’d think that dying would put these sorts of things to rest. It’s a shame that he’s like this, though, I’d have liked to speak about what I had done with Kostantiniyye after his passing and I would have liked to hear…how it was to live in there from his perspective. What I knew and had seen was a half-dead city, but to him… I’m sure he saw something beautiful. Maybe someday we can have that honest conversation about the city we loved.”

Conversation 6 (If you have Vlad III or Vlad EXTRA):

“That thing… There’s TWO of him?! No, no. Speak no more. I don’t want to know, nor do I want anything to do with him. *Shudder* Just thinking of him brings the scent of blood and ash to my nose.”

Conversation 7 (If you have Elisabeth Báthory):

“Master. On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the worst, how dangerous are a woman’s heels? …You’re not sure? Well, I can safely say that it is a 10. I had tried to strike up a friendly conversation with miss Báthory, only to narrowly avoid a fate worse than death. Judging by her comments, I believe that the devil she calls her ‘uncle’ informed her about me beforehand. Honestly, I haven’t a clue why she reveres him so much.”

Conversation 8 (If you have Astraea):

“Hello again—ow—Master. Oh, this? Ah, I got this from the Lady Justice herself. In my efforts to get administration to create and enforce rules for once, my shenanigans have unfortunately attracted the ire of none other than Astraea. To receive a suplex from a goddess may seem like an honor to some, but my neck and shoulders feel so stiff now. Ugh…I feel 20 years older.”

Conversation 9 (If you have Janta, Jack the Ripper, Paul Bunyan (Berserker), or Nursery Rhyme):

“Master… I know this may sound rich coming from me, but don’t you think it’s morally reprehensible to be sending Janissaries this young into the battlefield? …Eh? They aren’t Janissaries? And you can’t stop them from heading into the battlefield even if you tried? Well…hmph. This is a dilemma. If they haven’t caused you problems yet, then I suppose it should be fine. Just…keep an eye on them. I personally didn’t have this issue, but my successors found them to be more trouble than they’re worth.”

Likes:

“What I like? To answer that would take at least 3 hours, but I’ll water it down for you. I like my empire, cannons, rules and order, history and literature, the fine arts, the internet… There’s a lot to like in the world. But above all, I love Kostantiniyye. Er…you know her best as Constantinople. She is my crowning achievement and the apple of my eye. Strange to say about a city, I am aware…but were you to go there yourself, you’d realize that she is more than that. Much, much more.”

Dislikes:

“A good question…What DO I dislike? …Mmh… I probably should hold my tongue here. My next words could very well start a holy war! And that should be saved for when this is all over. Hehe…I’m looking forward to finally putting—ah, I almost said it. Again, that’s for later.”

About The Holy Grail:

“So this is the Holy Grail I’ve heard so much of… It definitely lives up to my expectations now that I have seen it in person. But the power within… No, I should not wish upon the grail. All of my achievements were by my hand and with God’s blessing. To wish upon the grail would devalue everything I had worked for and call my strength into question. I would only accept such a thing if there were no other options. So, do hold off on that.”

During an Event:

“Hahaha! Do you FEEL that, Master?! Hehehe! This is clearly what the beginning of a campaign feels like! Fortune favors the bold and the swift, Master, now follow me! After we get done sacking and rebuilding their city, I’ll teach you how to negotiate tributes and how to deal with those who don’t pay. These lessons are best taken hands on, so I expect you to be paying full attention!”

Birthday:

“Hehe… I know that look and I know what day it is. It is your birthday and I, in fact, have already prepared a gift for you. …Behold! A working replica of THE cannon I used to breach the Theodosian Walls! Splendid, is it not? Haha! I knew you’d like it. See, Master? THIS is where your tribute goes. Directly into things like this! Yes… Happy birthday, Master. May your dreams come true in the coming year.”

Bond 10:

“Hm? Sorry, I was lost in thought for a moment there. In any case, you’ve come at the right time. Here, sit beside me. Yes, there. No, it’s not too close. This small, tiny gap between us represents more than physical space. Meaning… Hehe. You already know, don’t you? I need not waste my breath then. …Remember when I had told you that I would stand beside you always? I had also, in a roundabout way, presented the question I had been asking myself ever since you summoned me. Did I waste my life putting my everything into my empire? And the answer is no. Not just because of the great things I did, but also because of what it lead to after my death. That being my time with you. Yes… I can’t remember the last time I had so much free time and so much leeway. Which is why I would like to say, from the deepest depths of my heart… Thank you, Master. For giving me everything I had missed when I was alive and so much more, thank you.”

Endnote: And that’s that! I’m pretty happy with how I’ve written his dialogue and what that says and implies about him as a whole. A somewhat nice balance between levity and seriousness with a side of nagging mentor figure. His darker side comes out a little bit in his 3rd ascension line and would come out in his battle lines with how much he’d be laughing and saying some very disturbing shit on top of it.

Oh, and that “Post Event Clear” thing is just a hypothetical for a Constantine-centric event I want to write (since Lasagna doesn’t feel like it) that I’ll put to words sometime soon. Hehe… It’s similar to an idea I proposed in a reblog a while ago but ultimately it’ll be the Micheal show. So do look forward to that.

From the beginning, I was planning on Mehmed’s desire to know everything and how destructive that can be to be his main issue, but as my internal hamster wheel got rolling, I realized that it’d be a little bit cooler to put that to the side a bit—since he mostly has a handle on himself anyways—in favor of Mehmed looking back on his life and wondering if it was a fulfilling one beyond his achievements. Here in Chaldea, he can pretty much do whatever he wants. He’s not the sultan anymore nor is he cooped up in his room studying to be the sultan someday, he’s just here and having all this freedom kinda fucks with him a bit since he’s so used to being caged. And to top it all off, he has a master who he sees himself in which messes with him even more. He eventually reaches the answer when he hits bond 10 and he sincerely expresses his gratitude for the assistance in him reaching that answer. Buuut until then he’ll be ruminating on that as well as if his life would have been more fulfilling if he was a normal person born to a normal family.

In other more Redline news, I watched Haibane Renmei recently and hoo boy was that shit so good! It gave me some inspiration for a few things as well as made me cry several times, so you know it’s good. Honestly, I want to draw Constantine as a Haibane because that’d fit him so well. Both the sub and dub are on youtube, so if you’re interested then look there!

But that’s just me. I hope you all enjoyed and have a nice night, everyone.

—Redline, over and out!

[cuckoo-on-a-string]

Superstition: Chapter 1

Namor x oc/reader (female)

(Currently PG-13, but likely heading towards very adult content, so read with that in mind.)

A/N: So, ya'll liked the teaser, eh? Here's a full chapter!

Tagging: Tags break my post, but I reply to comments on each new chapter when I post. Think of it as a personal, hand-written note.

Chapter 1

They said women of her kind should never touch the sea before they fell in love, that they’d lose their hearts to the waves. A forfeit to destiny or some such shit.

It was an old wives’ tale. A superstition.

But as the car careened towards the edge of the pier, rocketing over splintered wood without a hope of stopping before it hit the water, she kinda wondered if it was true. Just a little bit. The idea popped into her head like a bubble, random association as her brain fizzled through shock. Pain. Panic.

A bullet caught the driver’s side window, and it exploded in a rain of glass. Flinching away with closed eyes, she instinctively threw an arm across the wheezing, blue-skinned child in the passenger seat. The wheel jerked with the motion, and the car went over the side of the pier.

Freefall stole her belly, her sense of time, her understanding of gravity.

She had a suspended moment of clarity to reflect on her life choices, on her chances of surviving all this. In summary: she was an idiot, she missed her brothers, and she would not be seeing this adventure to its end.

None of it mattered. She had to escape, and she wasn’t about to leave the little girl with her big, terrified eyes floating in the tank beside her cell. Fuck that. The car, the pursuit, and the bullets were probably inevitable, anyway. At least she’d get the kid back somewhere she could breathe.

One of them would make it out alive.

And she’d rather bleed out from the bullet she’d caught than end her days in that cage. Or under a curious surgeon’s knife.

Better to give the ocean her heart.

They hit the water, and all was pain again. Saltwater gushed through the broken window, and the waterline climbed up the windshield much faster than she’d anticipated. But the kid looked better already. Less blue where the water swallowed her legs and chest.

Unlocking the girl’s seatbelt, she grabbed her by the arm, dragged her across her lap, and started stuffing her out the window. Hopefully she wouldn’t cut herself on the glass, but she needed to be out of the vehicle and on her way out to sea before the men with guns left their cars and started spraying the water.

“Go. Go on.” The water lapped up to kiss her chin, and ominous bubbles billowed from under the hood. She only had a few more good breaths before the car went under. “Get out of here, go.”

The kid reached through the window, pulling her arm, like she could return the favor. Scrambling to unlock her own seatbelt, she shook her head, trying to push the girl away. “I’m fine! Go!”

But as she tried to work the seatbelt free, she realized with dawning horror that the button wasn’t working. The mechanism must’ve jammed in the crash. She was anchored to her seat, and it was sinking fast.

“Fuck.”

She tipped her head back, neck straining as the surface moved up, and up, and over her face. Salt burned her eyes, and she barely saw anything beyond vague shapes in the dark water. The only light came from the full moon, and that was dwindling fast as gravity pulled her deeper. She ran her hands over the console, along the side of her seat, and along the edge of the window, looking for a shard large enough to cut herself free. But the window had shattered into diamond-sized fragments. Nothing big enough to save her.

The pressure roared in her ears, the ache bad enough to draw tears – not that she or anyone else could recognize them in this salty hell.

By the time car settled on the seafloor, about a dozen yards below the surface, she could see a faint cloud of red leaking from her side, and her brother’s taunting voice rang in her memory. “Don’t go swimming with a papercut or the water will get in, and it will get infected, and you will die.”

Well. This was no papercut, and she probably wouldn’t live long enough to get an infection, but she probably would die.

Wouldn’t he be so pleased to have been right?

She wanted him. She wanted all of her brothers. If any of the bastards shook her awake and laughed at her for being a big baby crying in her sleep she’d hug them, thank them, and never run off alone again. Or. She’d at least try. She’d really, really try.

She’d do anything.

Danu.

She didn’t want to die alone.

Thrashing in her seat, pinned as the burn in her lungs turned into frantic spasms, she clawed at the safety belt poised to end her life. Her chest was on fire. Her head felt like it might explode. How long before she broke? Before she had to breathe anything at all, even water?

Little hands clamped around her wrist, tugging.

And the damn fish kid still hadn’t left.

Fucking fuck.

The child was trying to say something. Her voice carried through the water, but she didn’t recognize the language, and it wasn’t like she could answer. Bubbles crept out her nose and she gestured out, away, towards deep water where the kid could escape their pursuers.

Shadows interrupted the moonbeams dancing over the wreck.

Gunfire, muted by the water, just barely cut through the thump of her heartbeat in her ears.

Another good tug on the seatbelt. Nothing.

She didn’t mean to open her mouth.

But she did. And the last of her air rose to stick on the roof of the sunken car in uneven bubbles. Her diaphragm jerked, inviting the sea into her lungs. It didn’t feel like water. It coursed through her like lava, an alien pressure with the soothing touch of an electrical burn.

Every limb took on a life of its own, a last ditch animal reaction to scramble for oxygen. A slow-motion blur of terror and agony as her brain shut down.

The last thing she felt was the seat belt’s sudden release, weightlessness, and hands on her shoulders.

Hands much too large to be a child’s.

----------------------------------------------

She dreamt of cold and dark. The maw of the ocean rising to swallow her as a jellyfish pasted itself over her face.

She dreamt of fire in her lungs and strangers’ voices as swirling black swallowed the moon and stars. No lights to guide her home. No wind to breathe.

Sinking.

Drowning – in water or in air. It didn’t matter.

Shivers quaked through her half-conscious mind as she floated towards awareness, and a sharp pain nearly brought her round. Fingers pushing through the hole in her side conjured iron on her tongue, and she writhed against the weight of hands pushing her down.

But she didn’t wake enough to hear her own screams, though they burned in her throat, and she drifted again.

Soft voices carried through the grey. She didn’t understand them, but a matronly hand pressed to her forehead once, blessedly cool against the fever turning her body into a cauldron. Thick wrinkles and shushing whispers. When it left, she might’ve cried, but without strength to reach for the hand, she could only sink back from the edge of light.

The dark promised peace. Quiet. Recovery or a final end, she wasn’t sure, and if she could resist, she would. She’d call for her brothers, swim back to them, find a grip and never let go again.

But she had nothing left beyond nightmares.

She was a child again, bare feet along the cool stone of a rath’s passage – a fortress made a home, full of places to explore and trouble to find. Tired of her brothers and her cousins, she followed the dim hall alone to the golden light of the crafting room.

“Máthair?”

Her mother’s work always inspired reverence. Her dexterous fingers wove the future, capturing fate and fortune in her patterns. At play, over breakfast, when she tucked her children in at night, the stately woman with whisps of grey threading stories through her hair was Mam. At the loom, she was the Weaver, and a Weaver deserved respect, so right now she was Máthair.

Máthair made the most beautiful things. Told the most beautiful stories. Wise men turned to her for advice, like her father, and strong men followed her words in war, like her biggest brother. She listened because the Weaver was her Mam, and Mam loved her children very much, even at her loom.

“Here, Caoimhe.” Her Máthair took her little fingers and pressed them against a silver line dancing between colorful strings. A moonbeam, or a wave, alive and whispering a tale in a voice like her own. She bit her lip, smiling as she traced it, oh-so-careful not to snag the delicate pattern with her broken nails – she played hard, and her brothers played harder.

“This is your thread, a stór. Do you like it?”

“Yes, Máthair.”

But as she spoke, the thread wobbled under her touch, turning wet. An ocean seeped free, pouring from the line like a waterfall, and she took a quick step back, gasping in her high, childish voice as the water pooled quick and cold around her ankles.

The rest of the woven threads burst into flame, and the whole piece peeled off the loom, sinking with churning bubbles as the water rose.

“Mam?”

She looked, but her Máthair, her Mam, had disappeared, and when she turned back to the loom, it had gone, too, replaced with a windshield webbed in cracks.

Trapped. Sinking.

Bubbles rose like a wall, screaming in a discordant choir as they climbed towards the surface, more ghosts than air.

She whined, tugging on her seatbelt as her hands became a woman’s again, and she called for help.

“Deartháireacha!”

Salt water sloshed past her open lips, and she choked, pleading.

“Cabhair liom.”

No one heard, and the sea rushed in, eager to claim its forfeit. It would serve her heart to sharks and sea lice, to the blind things in the deep, deep dark that didn’t know of the sun, or the moon, or the stars. Her family would never find her bones, and her soul would be lost to those sunless places, crushed and alone forever.

The water closed over her. The world turned blue.

And she opened her eyes.

The fish girl sat beside her, a transparent mask over her nose and mouth like the jellyfish she’d dreamed of. Once she realized Caoimhe was awake, the kid snatched her hand from where it rested in a … hammock?

Bouncing on her feet, holding Caoimhe’s hand in both of hers, she chanted, “Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello! Hello!”

Which was interesting because she knew for a fucking fact the girl didn’t speak a lick of English before the accident. She’d tried entertaining her when they were trapped, and she tried explaining her plan when they fled, but no one could fake the blank, confused expression she earned for her efforts.

How long had she been asleep? Or was she still unconscious? Was this the figure her subconscious had chosen to guide her towards the afterlife?

Half convinced she was still dreaming, she croaked a raspy, “Hello,” of her own, and the flinching pain finally convinced her she’d really, truly woken.

In a hammock.

With the fish girl.

Who suddenly spoke English.

The fuck?

Nothing else in the space made any more sense. It looked like a cave, full of stalactites and stalagmites, some of which looked like they’d grown more or less naturally into screens. Or bars.

Another cage?

Just as her breath caught on a hiccup of fear, figures moved on the other side of the apparent bars and opened a door. They looked like the kid. Blue-skinned, wearing the gelatinous face mask and similar clothes. Two women and a man. She thought she recognized the wrinkled skin on the elder woman’s hands, and when she settled one of those hands on Caoimhe’s forehead, she was sure of it.

The woman smiled, pleased by whatever she’d found. When her hand dropped, Caoimhe checked her head herself, like she’d grown letters there she could read with her fingertips.

Had she developed a fever maybe…?

While her hand was by her head, she checked to see if her hair still covered her ears. It did. Thank Danu. She lowered her arm back to her side before anyone noticed.

The woman – the kid’s grandmother? – addressed the other two adults, and a drop of relief soothed their tight expressions. Though hardly relaxed, the good news lifted at least one of their many concerns, and they hurried to move forward.

“It’s good you’re awake.” The younger woman brought a stool beside the hammock, and the child rested her head against the woman’s knee as she sat. “We did not know if your fever would break.”

“Thank you,” Caoimhe said in her rough voice. Had she screamed a lot in her sleep, or was it a consequence of drowning? “For pulling me out of the water.”

Very carefully, she sat up, mindful of the pull in her side where the bullet hit. Something soft and a little slick rubbed over her skin, wrapped tight to her wound, but she couldn’t bring herself to look. Not yet. She didn’t want to see the damage. She didn’t want to see some strange thing she didn’t understand holding her together. Not yet.  

The light, she realized, came from overhead. Glowworms. They cast an eternal twilight through the space, and she swallowed reflexively, wondering what in the fuck she’d gotten herself into.

“Where…” She looked back to the woman, probably the child’s mother. “Where are we?”

Inclusive language. Non-accusatory. No need to ruffle any feathers. Great damn need to orient herself, though.

Stiffening even as she tried to keep her face placid, the woman shook her head softly, saying, “I will do my best to answer your questions, but our king must speak with you first.”

Her turn to stiffen. Her breathing kicked up a notch, and she wrestled against the urge to hyperventilate.

The time had come to talk of many things, of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of cabbages and kings and why the sea is boiling hot.

She’d never heard of these people. They dressed in a fashion she might call Mayan, but she’d never heard of blue folk who breathed water, and she was getting the terrible, pressured sensation of being underwater. Like the ceiling would crack and the entire ocean would drop on her head at any second.

The little girl, still holding her hand, must’ve noticed her pulse jump, and she asked something in her parents’ language. The woman put a reassuring hand on her wrist, just above her daughter’s double grip.

“You saved our child. Our king will explain. Then we will talk.”

Caoimhe floundered, wincing as she strained to rise. “Can I – can I get up for this?”

The woman had eyes like Caoimhe’s oldest brother. A warrior’s eyes, looking within while analyzing without. She listened to the reason behind the question, the request for assistance, the desire to face their king out of bed, with a little more dignity and control than she’d find in the hammock.

Nodding, she rose from the stool and supported Caoimhe’s elbow. “Here.”

The woman helped her up, assuring she wouldn’t fall as she used her legs for the first time in…? As she gained her balance and cautiously assumed the seat with the little girl mirroring her mother’s support with much less efficacy under her other arm, the old woman Caoimhe assumed was the grandmother swooped a blanket over her shoulders, murmuring something under her breath.

Smirking, the mother said, “My mother says you look cold.”

Was she? She looked down and found gooseflesh creeping down her arms. Sometime between her rescue and recovery, they’d changed her into a simple white dress like the women of the family wore. Now that she mentioned it, she could definitely feel the damp air of the cave leeching heat from her skin. She’d been too uncomfortable to notice much besides the thrumming ache in her side and the fear stewing in the back of her thoughts.

“Thank you.”

The woman nodded again, but Caoimhe had a point to make. If things went poorly with their king, as the mother’s posture suggested it might, she wanted to make sure they knew she appreciated what they’d already done for her. “Really. Thank you. All of you.”

Regret flashed through the mother’s expression, followed by a wave of steely determination. She set her hands on Caoimhe’s shoulders, demanding her focus before she spoke. “We will speak again soon.”

Already feeling the weight of her own body, worn out by the effort of sitting up, she conserved her strength. She took her cue from the woman, nodding her agreement.

The woman straightened, her hands slipping away, and Caoimhe pulled the blanket tighter around her neck. Physical proof she wasn’t alone, that someone in this place wished her well. It immediately became the first comfort blanket she’d indulged in since she was six. Maybe, like that one, woven through with her mother’s magic, it would keep her safe.

The family left, and she summoned an anemic smile for the little girl before her parents towed her around the corner and out of sight. They closed the door as they went, and she sat in the cell, shivering and focusing on her breaths.

In and out.

Still alive.

In and out.

Lost.

Her breath caught. Fell out of rhythm.

Out and in.

At a stranger’s mercy.

Her half-drowned thoughts from the sinking car echoed in the present. She didn’t want to die. Not alone. Not so far from her family, her only real home. She wanted Eóghan to cluck over the bullet wound and put her together while Aodhfin called her twenty kinds of stupid. She even craved Dara’s disappointed glower, the weight of his brows dipping low with responsibility as he tried to express the gravity of the situation. Explaining everything she might’ve lost, what that would mean for the ones she loved.

And now she’d gone and lost herself, and once again she sent up silent prayers full of promises she knew she couldn’t keep.

Danu, Mother, let me go home and I’ll never wander again. I will be calm and still and –  

The door opened.

Her heavy thoughts had pulled her eyes to the floor, and she jerked to attention, startled to find a man watching her from the entrance to the cell.

His golden skin lacked the blue tint the kid and her family had out of the water. His ears narrowed to sharp points, and when he continued into the space, she saw the wings on his ankles.

Even without the heavy ornamentation he wore, he was every inch a king. Tall. Proud. So confident in his control of the situation he took a second stool and sat across from her.

No need to tower. To posture.

She was no threat, and he wanted her to know.

“What is your name?”

An inquisition, then. Not a friendly chat. Not yet at least. His measured tone left no room for anything but a truthful answer.

Fortunately, she had no good reason to withhold her name. The mother had given her the impression everything would be alright if she cooperated. She could give this much.

“Caoimhe.”

His chin angled up, and though he didn’t say it out loud, she could see him repeating her name in his head.

“My people call me K’uk’ulkan.”

A name she’d seen on paper. Never heard aloud. She remembered finding it in old books of mythology Dara collected. He always said their people were proof there was more to legend than empty stories. The name belonged to a fierce entity, something to be worshipped. More than a king, then.

The man named for a god observed her, gave her a moment to process what she clearly knew. Then he let the other name fall.

“My enemies call me Namor.”

The sharp dichotomy disturbed her, and she recalled the concern in the mother’s eyes. A diplomatic policy dividing the world into those he was sworn to protect and those he had reason to kill did not leave much room for negotiation. It also explained why she’d never heard of his people beyond the faintest trace of myth.

She tried not to pull away. Tried not to let her shoulders bow in an attempt to look smaller. She was what she was. She couldn’t change for this king. She shouldn’t give him the impression she could be forced to.

“And anyone else?”

His eyebrows lifted, and his eyes pierced hers. A note of challenge. “There is no one else.”

“Where does that leave me?” She often played word games with her brothers. It was fun to twist the truth to dance over a lie, to angle shadow and light in new ways across old ideas. But this wasn’t a game, and she needed answers. In all her years of play, she’d learned the bluntest tools sometimes made the best weapons. “Last I checked, I don’t turn blue.”

His tone didn’t change – this was still very much a matter of life and death – but cool amusement glittered in his eyes. “Where do you think that leaves you, surface dweller?”

She shifted, not quite squirming, keeping her eye on him. Holding still never came naturally to her, and now it was absolutely draining. He definitely noticed, and she hated it. “I’m not dead yet. Someone’s gone to great lengths to keep me that way.”

He flashed a grin, and she found he had a charming smile. Ridiculously charming, considering the circumstances. His confidence here was not at all a show. The consequences of this interaction would not touch him long, and he could afford to treat her blithely.

“Not such great lengths, but yes. Atziri wouldn’t leave your side, and her mother is one of my warriors. She argued it was a matter of honor, so I pulled you from the wreck, and her family has cared for you.”

He’d given her more information than the child’s family seemed comfortable giving. That was something. “The kid’s name is Atziri?”

A drop of warmth swam through the amusement in his eyes. Either he approved of the question, or the girl had carved out a soft spot in her king’s heart.

“Yes.”

“I’m glad she’s alright.”

It wasn’t a ploy. She was genuinely glad. Just as she would’ve been genuinely pissed if anything happened to the girl after she lost consciousness. Dying a hero and dying an idiot rode the same thread of fate.

The king huffed, white teeth gleaming as he only half-repressed his laugh. “She is much… hardier than you.”

Rude.

But probably true.

“Of course, I couldn’t help noticing you’re no ordinary surface dweller.”

Two long fingers reached out towards her face, and – bemused – she let them. She didn’t understand what he wanted, what he was doing. She hadn’t hurt her face as far as she knew, and her puzzled frown grew as the fingers passed her cheek –

And smoothed back her hair to touch the delicate point of her ear.

Fight or flight instincts carried her out of the conversation and a few steps across the cell before his hand could lower – or touch her again.

Her back met the wall as her stool clattered to the floor. Not nearly far enough. The damn stone felt maliciously designed, like the glass of the laboratory cell. And of course it was. There were bars, weren’t there? This was a prison.

Her heart kicked in her chest, the extra oxygen and adrenaline flooding her system as muscles tensed for a fight and her vision narrowed to the immediate threat.

He hadn’t moved. Hand still suspended, he drank in her reaction, studying her in a new light with a determined focus that swallowed the scraps of playful warmth he’d shown before. She told him things. With her wild eyes. Her desperate breaths. Her swift and sudden fear at being noticed. At being found out.

Clearly, he knew the ways of hidden things. He followed a very different path to secrecy, but one of his own ended up in the same hands that took Caoimhe, so even if they followed different routes, they forded the same rivers. They faced the same obstacles. The same consequences greeted their mistakes, and this – proving whatever suspicions he already had – must be another misstep.

She’d told him too much, and she rushed to banish her instinctive reaction, to distract from the cool calculations turning in the man’s eyes.

“Do you always touch women without asking permission?”

It was like slamming a door in his face. Don’t look here. Don’t wander in. Recognize you’ve strayed where you are not welcome and take a step back for both our sakes.

And, to her great surprise, he did.

The hand fell so he could rest an elbow on his knee, head tilting a fraction. Mischief twinkled through the curiosity in his eyes. No one with his kind of power should be able to summon such boyish charm. It was damn dangerous.

“May I touch you?” He smiled. A beautiful man used to getting his way.

“No. You may not.” She drew herself up. A determined prisoner prepared to bite anyone who dared breach her consent.

She wasn’t flirting. He might be.

Still grinning, like her diversion was a game he enjoyed, he lifted his hands to his shoulders, palms out, before dropping them to his knees.

She tried to think of a distraction from the distraction. This was not a very safe topic for an injured woman kept behind bars to banter over with a king. When she drew boundaries, only his honor and tastes prevented him from stepping across.

“Atziri greeted me in English when I woke up.”

His grin slowly closed, though a curl lingered at the corner of his mouth. “I ordered her mother to start teaching her. You are her responsibility now, and she must acknowledge that burden.”

Learning one of the least sensical and most unnecessarily complicated languages on the planet wasn’t a short-term investment. He called her a burden. She imagined she could feel the weight of seatbelt across her lap and chest again, anchoring her to the bottom of the sea.

Maybe she didn’t escape her death. This didn’t sound like rescue.

As she came to that realization, he read it in her face.

Once again, she shared too much, and he nodded as her expression fell towards despair.

“There was a choice to make.” His eyebrows lifted, just a little, opening his expression so she could read him in turn. Earnestness. It had been no easy decision, and her situation was urgent. Hadn’t she felt herself slipping towards the world of ghosts?

He continued, lancing the wound so as not to draw out her suffering.

“We could not leave you on the shore. You would be found again, and besides, you’d already seen Atziri.” 

She closed her eyes, wondering how she could still breathe as the gravity of his words gathered like rocks in her stomach.

Fine. Danu heard her. She didn’t die alone. But she’d never be with her brothers again. Judging by the cave and the people who needed water to breathe, she’d probably never see the stars again either.

Fucking fuck. This couldn’t be right. It wasn’t what she meant. Not at all. At the gates of death, she wanted her family. She wanted the sun.

This was all wrong.

Her knees buckled. Brought low by physical weakness and the king’s blow to her hope, she sank down the wall.

“You will stay here, the permanent guest of Atziri’s family. They will return the life they owe you, and you will keep Talokan’s secrets.”

Resolute. As hard as the polished jade in his ears. The decision had already been made, and her only choice was whether to let her tears fall now – in front of him – or later – alone. Opening her eyes took courage. And it took skill to pull the water back, to flutter her lashes just so, banishing the drops before they fell.

He approached on his winged feet as she pulled herself together, taking a knee just far enough back to not let her keep her personal space. Apparently he’d learned after touching her ear. He didn’t want to set her off, an unnecessary kindness that looked pallid in the shade of the entire life he’d just taken away. There was compassion in his gaze, but not enough to save her.

“I can always give you a quick death.”

An offer of mercy, but the finality of her only available alternative sent chills flooding down her spine. Under her blanket, she shuddered.

He picked up each hint to her thoughts, collecting the pieces of herself she so carelessly dropped, and grew a new smile.

“Though, after all the time and effort that my people have invested in your recovery, that would be a terrible waste.”

[thebrokendigitalcircusau]

A Near Disaster

Pomni barely got any sleep the previous night.

Ugh, I shouldn't have played with that fidget toy.

She rolled out of bed and picked up a fidget toy off the floor. She always hated organizing her stuff, so she'd just leave it on the floor. Her hair was a mess. She put the fidget toy in her pocket and staggered down the hallway.

"Hey, kid. Didn't get much sleep, did you?"

It was Jax in his usual mocking tone. Pomni facepalms.

"What do you want, Jax?"

Jax had a smug expression on his face.

"Kinda rude, Pomni. I was just saying hi."

"Hello, residents of the digital circus!"

Pomni winced. Caine was always really obnoxious. She was tired and she didn't feel like putting up with anything today.

"Caine, can you... tone it down? You're a bit loud."

"Nonsense! I'm not loud!" Caine exclaimed.

Jax groaned, annoyed. Pomni could've sworn she heard him say something under his breath.

"I'm blind, hut I wish I was deaf right now."

No, she must be hearing things. Jax isn't blind. He can see... right?

"Well, come on now, you're just in time for our digital adventure!"

Doof, who had heard everything, came out of her room.

"Shut up, Caine!"

Her tone came off sharp, surprising both Pomni and Caine. Even Jax was a bit surprised. Doof was kind of grumpy, but she was never usually the type to get angry enough to yell.

"Woah, a bit aggressive there, huh, sis?"

"Shut up, Jax."

"Whatever, Doofy."

"I told you to stop calling me that!"

"I don't care."

Doof looked like she was ready to tear Jax apart.

Pomni was watching Jax. Once again, his pupils didn't seem to focus on what he was 'looking' at.

"Jax, can I speak to you?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, whatever."

He put his hand underneath Doof's chin.

"See ya later, sis."

"Don't put your hand there. It makes us look like a couple."

"Yeah, so?"

"We're siblings!"

"So? It's not like we're actually dating or anything. Not to be dramatic, but I'd literally rather die than date my sister."

He finally left Doof alone and followed Pomni.

"So, what'd you want to talk about?"

Pomni sighed. How should she go about this? Should she just be blunt about it?

"Jax, this might sound a little bit random, but your pupils never focus on whatever you're looking at."

"Yeah, because I can't look at anything."

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm blind. I can't see anything. That's why my pupils don't focus."

Pomni was completely taken off-guard. If Jax was blind, how come she's the only one he told? Why was he acting so casually about it? That's impossible, isn't it? Wait, now that she looked closer at Jax's eyes, she noticed his pupils were kind of foggy, almost gray instead of black. As if reading her mind, Jax answered those questions.

"I know you have ADHD. I may not be able to see, but I can still hear. I keep hearing you either talking about it or playing with fidget toys. I mean, I know I'm not really a rabbit, just a human inside of a video game, but rabbit ears are pretty sensitive."

Pomni's heart sank. Jax is the type of person to tell everyone someone else's secrets.

"I won't say anything about it, kid. I hide my blindness from everyone, so I can see why you hide your ADHD, no pun intended. It'll be our little secret."

Pomni was taken aback. Of all people, Jax was the one she could trust?

"What do you say, kid?"

"Alright, it's our little secret. Thanks, Jax."

"Well, we better get back before everyone gets suspicious."

"Good idea."

As they headed back, Doof glared at them.

"Where were you? You missed most of the digital adventure."

"Eh, not my fault, sis."

Doof groaned, annoyed.

---------------------

The entire adventure was disorienting for Pomni. She was absolutely exhausted, but oddly enough, still restless. This caused a spark of suspicion from Zooble, who was next to her at the moment.

"Pomni, what's with the restlessness? You're always like this."

Pomni couldn't think of what to say. Out of panic, she took out her phone and flashed the light at Zooble, which made her really twitchy.

"Hey, don't do that! What the hell's wrong with you?!"

Gangle was quick to step in front of Zooble to prevent the lights from flashing in her eyes. This was really unusual. Gangle usually had some loud outbursts, but she was never the type to yell.

"You almost gave her a seizure!"

"Hold on, she gets seizures?"

"Yeah, she's epileptic! Only I know about it!"

Pomni froze with shock. She had no idea Zooble was epileptic. Were flashing lights that big of a threat to her?

"Zooble, Gangle, I'm so sorry."

"I'm sorry too," Gangle said. "I should've never shouted at you like that. I don't know what I was thinking."

Zooble sighed.

"No, no, it's okay. You couldn't hear your own voice."

Pomni was a bit confused. What did Zooble mean by that? Why wouldn't Gangle be able to hear her own voice?

-----------------

Any guesses as to why Gangle can't hear her own voice? I also posted THIS on Wattpad, but I decided to put it on Tumblr too.

[blood-injections]

hiiiii wpuld llove to hear some funghoul thoughts if you gotany

I always have fun ghoul thoughts :)

His identity or like my headcanons for it kind of fluctuate because i tend to project on him a lot of the time lol, and right now my thing for him is its kinda inhuman, not literally, but he feels detached from being a person, his pronouns have always been he/it, and he says he/hims his favorite, but whenever someone uses it/its and he hears it he gets a crazy flush of euphoia. It doesn't happen often, though, just with his friends, and they only use it/its half the time cause, yknow, and its never opened up about just how it makes it feel, he could ask them to only say it and they would. But the rest of the zones? Eh. Even killjoys are weird about it/its a lot. And he still likes he as well

But yeah, he feels inhuman a lot of the time, and he likes that, he likes his identity being something Other, something scary, hes not sure if its something animal he feels like or something unknown, he just knows he'd rather lunge and bite in battle instead of shooting a gun, get blood and skin under his nails, it feels more natural, and he likes when people look at him like hes a monster and he should get to have sharp teeth and claws.

He loves stories!!! Stories and cultures!! Hearing and learning, and oral storytelling is such a big thing in the zones, with there being few books left and with most zoneborn not knowing how to read, like him, not zoneborn but raised on the streets in battery city, he can read some, but not well, and it just makes his head hurt. But ghoul grew up around androids and ritalin rats and the latter never had much on their minds but addiction, but the droids, well they had nothing to do but dream. And they told him stories, so many stories, stories of the future when the city would be free and they wouldn't have to rust in the streets, thrown aside by society, nothing more than products. They told it stories filled with hope, stories of Destroya, of the grafiiti bible, stories of a future where no one would have to work or starve or hurt.

Then he got to the zones and heard different kinds of stories, old ones, not of the future but of the past. It met Jet first, and theyd sit around a fire and shed tell him all about the desert, not about her own past, something it could guess was still a wound too fresh to face, much like his, when he first escaped. But she tells him of the zones, of the Phoenix Witch, how she takes masks or guns or keepsakes and leads your soul to your next life when you die, and how she commonly watches over the desert in the form of a raven, and hes fucking enraptured. And then jet takes it to visit dr d, a friend of a friend, and he gets to hear stories of the wars that he was never taught of in the city, and he gets to hear of the world before, because it has so many questions and dr d is more than willing to answer them, he loves Talking, telling stories, sharing what life used to be like.

And later, from Cherri, he learns older stories yet, myths and legends passed down from forgotten times, of giant birds that brought rain and thunder, to a myth of fire and a technicolor raven, stories of spirits and heroes and the desert itself. Everyone has stories to tell and it loves to hear them and pass them on, to Kobra, who especially loves the sort or stories he got from Cherri, of legends from an old people who were one with the land; and when the girl comes along and they take her in, he retells all the stories hes heard to her. Her favorites are of the world before the wars, things Ghoul never saw but learned of through dr d and older joys, of bustling citys not like bat city at all, of concerts with thousands of people in the stands, not just a small pit of joys, stories of people flying to the stars and landing on the moon, and of waterparks and airplanes, or high schools and ice cream trucks. By then he has stories of it's own, too, and she loves to hear those too, stories of bad firefights and hearty laughs, memories from the fab four before they had her, of poison doing something stupid or kobra getting sprayed by a skunk or that time jet woke up to find a mouse has nested in her hair in her sleep, the girl giggles the most at those stories.

He'd write novels if he could, if he the time and supplies and skill. Or he'd at least copy some of the stories hes heard back to paper, for when theres no one left that remembers them to tell them by voice alone.