#random does cannibalism for fun

[cybertron-smash-or-pass]

TFA Blitzwing

[a-hazbin-reader]

K so I loved your egg and dog, why not next a real kid. The cannibal kids, like the kids adore y/n when ever she comes to town to visit. They do multiple fun activities like makeing flower crowns or just somthing as simple as hopscotch!

(Proves y/n would be a good mom.)

Y/N would be a good mom!! I believe in her!!

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Children in mild danger, Cartoonish antics, Reader wants children, Alastor being possessive, Sad implications

Description: 👆⬆️

Alastor likes taking you to Cannibal Town, he likes that everyone there loves you nearly as much as he does

He likes showing you off and letting Rosie brag about you for him

Because she totally brags about you, not letting Alastor get a word out to say it himself

And the children all listen to Rosie so they quickly turn their attention on you with sparkling eyes and grabby hands

And you are immediately enamored with them too, giving them tight squeezes and gentle pecks on their chubby cheeks

It's adorable that the children have taken such a shine to you, really it is

"Y/N! Y/N! Come play with us!"

"Alright~ Alright~"

Not the littlest one leading you by holding onto your finger

And the way you indulge them just makes his heart melt, watching you play along with their antics

You mend their clothes for them, bandage their boo-boos, bring them snacks so they aren't tempted to gnaw on each other

Or you

Plus it gives him time to chat with Rosie or shop for surprise gifts for you so he doesn't necessarily mind it

Except those kids never seem to run out of energy or get sick of your attention

Sometimes he finds you surrounded by them, all of you snuggled up together and relaxed

Are those flowers in your hair?

Yes, yes they are.

Or you'll seek him out, one child on your shoulders and another in your arms, both asleep

But your husband wants to take you home and get some snuggles with you for himself

And cannibal children are fucking ruthless when it comes to something they want so he has to get creative to get his wife back

"Here~! Have some scissors! Run as fast as you can with them~!"

"ALASTOR!"

"Oh fuck-"

They 100% fight back though, those children are smart and ruthless, quick to realize Alastor is competition

That's part of why he likes the cannibal children so much tbh

They will literally throw him in a well if it means spending five more minutes with you

It becomes a cartoonish war between Alastor and the children, one with little malice but many dangerous antics on both ends

With you in the middle

You even start to play along, picking different sides at random and turning things into a game

It's totally not an excuse to watch your husband play with children and it definitely doesn't make your heart ache

Once Alastor stops to realize how you're looking at him and sees how much warmth your gaze holds then he starts to understand something

Something that makes his heart throb a little but he tucks it away for when you two are alone

Alastor starts to join you in hanging out with the children after that, enjoying the maternal side of you more than he would care to admit

And seeing him act even remotely fatherly is obviously doing things for you so that's a bonus for him too

You two are constantly followed by a gaggle of children now, the two of you looking like duck parents

If you run into any of the overlords then Alastor will pit the kids against them, telling them to get their Aunty/Uncle

Bonus points if its Vox and they take off a piece of him and bring it back to Alastor

They love biting their Uncle Vox~

They even visit you two at the hotel sometimes, all of them storming the building and wreaking havoc until they find your room

Not all of them trying to sneak into bed with you two as silently as possible

Okay no-

He's going to start locking doors now

Go ahead, old man they'll just break them down

Alastor totally doesn't make them Charlie and Vaggie's problem afterwards just so that he can have some peace

More cuddles with his wife please

"Alastor...we should get the children home..."

"Five more minutes, my dear~"

How can you say no to him when he's kissing your neck like that?

Five more minutes

He's amused when you try to explain away the love marks on your neck and shoulders in a PG way

Kids ask the silliest questions, don't they?

You always sigh happily at the end of the day once the kids have gone home, leaning on your husband

You look tired but happy, Alastor committing the look to memory

He catches you staring at the kids fondly and looking at baby clothes a little more often

Maybe you hold a baby for a little too long, voice a little too thick with emotion

It's obvious to him that being around the children makes you happy but also makes you wish for something more

And all he wants is his wife to be happy

So maybe he should have that conversation with you that he's been putting off for awhile

Alastor isn't really a coward, but when it comes to difficult conversations with you, he's definitely reluctant

He doesn't like to see you get worked up and if the conversation goes where he thinks it's going to go then...you're gonna get upset

Waits until the two of you are snuggled up together in bed, his arm wrapped snuggly around you

You're nearly asleep, happily breathing in your husband's scent and lazily stroking his chest

"Y/N...do you want a family with me?"

Now you're wide awake

🥹🥺🥹 literally me after this

[obbystars]

Drop some random sebastian headcanon u have in mind fics related or not if u ever had one pls drop itudulfyldyostoakakak😇😇

(ALRIGHTY LET’S SEE IF I’VE STILL GOT IT IN ME TO MAKE A HEADCANON POST)

CONTENT WARNING: cannibalism in post-experimentation section

Notes: Sebastian Solace x GN!Reader / General Relationship Headcanons + some general Sebastian headcanons / kid you not pulling this up i realized i did not have any headcanons for sebastian thought out so i spent a good while thinking LSJDJSNX / i hope you guys know this is written by someone who has not dated before (has no idea what they’re doing) / wishing this could’ve been longer

Credits: dividers by @cafekitsune

To be honest, when it comes to entering a relationship with Sebastian, I can never see it happening when you meet during the events of the game. Like, obviously he only sees all of expendables as research collectors (and possibly food) and that’s pretty much it. He does not give two shits about us.

If you knew him before he got arrested, or even knew him while he was a prisoner under Urbanshade (specifically another prisoner), then yes I can see it happening. Of course, if you knew him beforehand and became an expendable for whatever reason after, then yes I can also see it. It’s because you knew who he was before he became what he is now, y’know?

Anywayy…

He’s a teasing type of partner. Often making sarcastic comments whenever he sees the opportunity to, pushing some of your buttons just for the fun of it, all that stuff. He can tone it down if you ask though, or if he sees it’s actually bothering you.

Sebastian does like cuddling but he is almost never the one to initiate it. It’s not that he’s uncomfortable (well he kinda is sometimes), he’s also not sure if you’re comfortable with it unless you voice it to him. Will that change anything? Not really, you’ll still need to initiate most of the time.

It’s probably obvious now that I see a relationship with Sebastian will require quite a bit of communication, but there’s nothing wrong with that. As long as you can respect his boundaries whenever he voices it, there won’t be any problems. Be sure to voice yours too, he doesn’t want to overstep any of yours either.

He’s a listener. Ramble about the most random stuff to him and he’d unintentionally take in the information. Sometimes you just going on and on about stuff makes it easier to work on his homework even if what you’re rambling about is related to your own work. If random factoids aren’t exactly what he’s looking for, playing music also helps. You can take turns playing music. He rambles too but not all the time. Usually it’s something relating to his engineering class.

Sebastian can cook up something really good whenever he feels like it. It’s not super fancy but he can recreate some of his mom’s recipes. When it’s not that, it’s just a simple peanut butter and jelly sandwich or something microwaved. It really depends on the mood he’s in. If you cook, try making something he hasn’t had, like a dish from your country. He’s always willing to try.

Quality time type of partner. You don’t really need to be doing anything, he’s happy just being in the same room as you.

You two are watching YouTube videos on his laptop in bed late at night until you both fall asleep. One of you sometimes wakes up to put the laptop away, while other times it was almost kicked off the bed. Thankfully it hasn’t happened yet.

Game date nights. Whether it’s PvP or Co-op, you’re both playing. Local or online, doesn’t matter. As long as it’s multiplayer. Sebastian does strikes me as a rogue-like, souls, shooter type of gamer though. He probably picked up Sims at some point and got way too into making houses rather than actually making Sims. Sometimes he playa horror but it scares the shit out of him most of the time.

He sometimes plays his guitar for you, even asking if you have any requests. If you ask nicely enough, he’d help you learn how to play if you don’t already. If you actually end up getting your own, he’d be so down to play with you.

Meeting with his family is pretty much a must (his mom wants to meet you). His big sister embarrasses him by telling you just how much he “gushes” about you. In reality, he talks about you to them whenever they ask and if you two are going out just so they know and to not call or text him or anything until then. Still, his family likes you and that’s all he wants.

Post-Experimentation

Remember how I said Sebastian isn’t exactly uncomfortable with touch? Yeah, now he is. He has a bubble around him and he does not like it when someone gets too close whether it was intentional or not. His reaction to it can vary from shoving them away to a more violent reaction that may lead to a serious injury or even death.

Upon finding a corpse and being so terribly hungry, he had to try and force himself to eat it. The idea of eating another person made him want to spit it all out, to regurgitate all of it out. Flesh, bones, intestines, lungs, liver, heart… “Keep it in your stomach. You won’t find much food after this.” Eventually, he was able to stomach it. Eventually, it became natural.

If you’ve known him before all of this and he meets up with you while the lockdown is still happening, yeah he has questions cause what the hell. He wants to keep you safe, but if you stay around too long, Urbanshade might get suspicious that they lost an expendable’s signal. It’s already bad enough that they want him dead, and the scrambler can be a dead giveaway if their operatives suddenly can’t contact HQ. Just don’t die while you’re out there, please. It’d also be best if they don’t find out about your much deeper connection with him, so there’s another reason why it’d be difficult to stay in touch with each other in the facility.

He’d try to get in touch with Painter just to let him know about you. Lead the Good People away, shoot down a wall dweller that you haven’t noticed yet, all that stuff. He can’t do much about the bull shark, squiddles, and the anglers but he can try to do something about Pandemonium. Unlike the anglers, it’s not a cloud of smoke and is really just rotting flesh.

Physical touch with him in this case is still complicated. He’s very uncomfortable with it and it may take a while for him to warm up to your touch again. He’s not gonna hit you or anything, god no. If you were anyone else, one he doesn’t know, absolutely. He’ll try to express that. The topic itself is sensitive and he never likes bringing it up.

Assuming Mr. Lopee has taken an interest in you and allows you to keep coming back after every death, Sebastian is more willing to help you. Will he give you a discount though? No, especially not if there are other expendables with you. (he will slip in a battery or two though) It’s also a little less worry for him since death isn’t the end for you, but he wonders just how long it’ll take for Urbanshade to realize one of their prisoners is capable of coming back to life. You’re not supposed to have access to the Ferryman Tokens. The expendable protocol was specifically made so that Urbanshade didn’t have to use so much of them.

If you happen to come across something rare or something he usually sells at a high price, he’d appreciate it if you allowed him to take it off your hands and sell it to one of the other EXR-Ps. More intel from them means a higher chance of escaping (hopefully). You two will likely be stuck here for a while as long as no one else takes the crystal before then.

yeah uh

that’s all i got ����

[cindytoast404]

hatchetfield dashboard simulator

🎧average-theater-enjoyer Follow

whoever got the last tickets to mamma mia i hope you fucking die

☄️harbringeroftheapotheosis Follow

I have good news for you, op!

3,428 notes

🌺cryingonthefloor-deactivated20210424

running for honey queen this year, wish me luck!!!

🛍️ queenb-deactivated20210503

Alright, Liz Cunningham from Clivesdale.

🌻fuck-clivesdale1935 Follow

GUYS OP JUST GOT DRIVEN OUT OF TOWN WHAT LMAO

🪶birdwatcher Follow

To be fair, she was from Clivesdale. Anyway, respect for whoever got rid of her. You’re an icon.

🪻thetheoristsofhatchetfield Follow

oh my god this post is so interesting. there’s doxxing. both original commenters are now missing or dead. did some research and apparently the honey queen pageant winners have kept turning up missing every year. what is going on over there

☁️floatingupabove Follow

that’s just the average beauty pageant experience

6,364 notes

🐽theonewhofeastsinthedark Follow

cannibalism 👍

72,263 notes

📱alicewoodward Follow

does anyone else think we should shut down watcher world? i mean that place has gotta be violating at least 5 different safety rules, right

💜blinky’s-sniggles-deactivated20200104

ihaven’t eaten in a week! ::)

📱alicewoodward Follow

jesus christ don’t you guys have like. a union or something

💜blinky’s-sniggles-deactivated20201004

we would, but then he’d get mad! :::)

📱alicewoodward Follow

god. can someone get these bitches a lawyer

👨‍⚖️garygoldstein-attorney Follow

Hi, Gary Goldstein, Attorney at Law-

📱alicewoodward Follow

does this town really only have one lawyer

73 notes

👁️ watcher-world-official Follow

This is your friendly reminder to tell a Watcher World employee if you see a sniggle acting against the rules. This includes accessing social media of any kind, including tumblr. It is forbidden by the Watchers, and any sniggles caught using it will be reprimanded.

On another note, ticket prices are now 50% cheaper! Stop by for a weekend of fun. You’ll never want to leave!

43,464 notes

🪴emma-the-crabby-barista Follow

some guy just walked into beanies and just ordered a cup of black coffee for once. see this is how it should be. no fancy drinks, make my life easier. tall random stranger i am in love with you

🪴emma-the-crabby-barista Follow

update: we’re dating

264 notes

🖼️ horror-lover Follow

okay but why is wiggly kinda… 😳😳

☁️ floatingupabove Follow

THE DOLL??!???

🍏 uncle-wiley Follow

I literally sold my soul for that bastard and this still threw me for a loop.

🤓pete-has-been-waiting-for-five-fucking-years Follow

Why is there blue in my hot chocolate.

☄️ harbringeroftheapotheosis Follow

i recommend you drink it!!! :)

🤓pete-has-been-waiting-for-five-fucking-years Follow

…Okay.

🤓pete-has-been-waiting-for-five-fucking-years Follow

i feel like singing.

712 notes

[starbuck]

Ravenous is Haunted

Within the lore of Ravenous, eating people causes you to “absorb [their] spirit,” but what does that mean in practice?

Ives mentions that eating someone brave gives you a surge of bravery, which is exactly how Boyd goes from too scared to move to single-handedly capturing the enemy command. The spirit of his fellow soldiers and specifically his commanding officer compel him to do it. But we know that this personality shift is not permanent, it abates. However, I believe that there are other more subtle influences that remain. 

There’s a whole collection of things Boyd, Ives, and Hart do and say that mirror the actions and words of the people they’ve eaten…

The protectiveness that Boyd shows towards the Fort Spencer crew after Ives arrives as colonel is a new trait for him and highly reminiscent of Reich’s protectiveness towards Toffler. From the moment he’s stuck with Ives at the fort, Boyd also immediately decides to murder him, the thing that Reich died furious at him for not doing, and never strays from this mission at all. Boyd and Ives both headbutt each other in their final fight, a Knox fighting move, and Boyd also attempts to strangle Ives at one point, which is Reich’s. Another example that I like is when Hart says to the chickens he’s feeding “run away! run for your lives!” which is what Toffler died doing. These are all small moments in isolation, but together they form a compelling picture. 

For another thing, you have Boyd mentioning to Hart near the end the “nightmares” he’s “still” having about Reich, Cleaves, and Knox. These aren’t just random trauma nightmares, they are specifically about the three people of the Fort Spencer crew that he’s eaten. And, considering how strongly Hart reacts to the mention of this, he is likely experiencing the same thing. Since it is canon that they have actually ABSORBED these people by eating them, I don’t think it’s a stretch at all to call this a haunting. 

Put these together and you have the people who have been eaten haunting the cannibal characters at night and maintaining at least some sway over them by day, often without them even realizing it… Fun stuff!

As far as Ives goes, I think that he is less affected by this phenomenon than Boyd and Hart are. He’s been eating people for much longer than they have, he has no moral compass whatsoever, and he has a very strong personality, so he’s not gonna let a little haunting get to him. That being said, who knows what quirks of his personality we might be able to attribute to people he’s eaten in the past if we knew more about them? I also think that his assumption that he is unaffected by the people he eats is a part of his downfall, and I’ll explain that in a moment. 

The last thing I want to talk about is the bell because that’s what REALLY gets me mmmmmmmmmmm… SO! During Boyd’s fight with Ives, there’s a moment where Ives has fled the room they were fighting in and Boyd doesn’t know where he is, so he’s checking behind all these random doors and not finding him when he hears a bell ringing in the courtyard. He goes out and sees the ringing bell but no one near it. Instead of going towards it where he knows Ives is likely waiting for him though, he walks towards the barn, as if in a daze. When he enters, he sees the bear trap and gets an “Aha!” look on his face. 

Now, who do we know who is associated with both that bell and a bear trap? It’s Reich! He is the only person we ever see ring that bell and (in a deleted scene) he uses bear traps as target practice, shooting at them to snap them shut while Boyd watches. So, at the very least, we can say that Reich indirectly inspires Boyd in that course of action. 

BUT, because I am me, I’d like to take it a step further by proposing that, since Reich is haunting both Boyd AND Ives, he influences Ives to ring the bell (with Ives not consciously thinking anything more of about than “this will surely get Boyd’s attention >:)”) and then influences Boyd to walk over to the barn instead of immediately continuing the fight so he can show him how to end it once and for all. Boyd asked Reich to “tell me what to do,” and Reich answered him!

I did also write a fic about this concept a few years ago if anyone is interested!

[hazbinhazmeinachokehold]

Hello!!! I don’t normally request stuff so idk how to format this, but could you please do like hcs on what it would be like dating Velvette & Rosie (separately) and preferably as a girl?

Not forcing but tysm if you do!!!

a/n: not really gender but written with fem reader in mind

-Very sweet and old timey cartoon-eqsue (but like the cute ones)

-slow dancing, big bouquets, maybe even some love letters. Which is still a thing people do but when at least one of you is wereing a Victorian-era dress it carries a different meaning.

-if you're also a cannibal here then expect to be chilling when she comes in with a dead person like "Hey honey I decided to get lunch!"

-If you're not a cannibal She'll do her best to make non-human-meat good.

-which might be hard cause you live in cannibal colony but y'know.

-values communication tremendously.

-likes to buy you clothes. Mainly dresses in the same style as hers. If dresses ain't your thing she's happy to get suits instead. If you don't like formal wear well fuck.

-Overall very sweet and lovey-dovey, great women to date if you ignore the cannibalism

fashion icons.

-about media posts and making fun of the vees

-Posts a lot about you. To be fair she does that with everyone she has any form of relationship with (whether it's positive or negative.) It's like a ride of passage to show you made an impact on her.

-Brags about you to Vox and Valentino

-Her partner has to be the best of the best so there isn't any reason not to.

-She also does it to make fun of Vox with his weird Alastor obsession.

-GOSSIP GOSSIP GOSSIP

-On both sides.

-Like you could have the most boring life yet she wants to hear about it.

Listen it may have just been petty work drama but she's ready to square up with random middle-aged women for you.

[lutewife]

Hazbin Hotel reacts to...

Part 1:

A Lively Reader

Warnings: Cannibalism mentioned in Alastor's part, but overall it's pure fluff and crack. Notes: Had so much fun writing it, esp on Alastor's part haha! Also it reminded me of those gacha life reaction videos… If you know you know 😂 Dunno if I did it right, though, kind of looks like headcanons to me, but enjoy nevertheless! Oh, and I tried to write it gender neutral, hope you don't mind. This will be two parts, since it's easier for me to do it like that.

Charlie's probably the easiest one.

She is so, SO happy to have new residents, regardless of how they behave or look.

The first thing that will stand out to her, though is your colourful personality.

You match her energy? That surely is something new to this girl, but she absolutely doesn't mind. In fact, she is more than happy to have someone like that in the hotel.

If you are actually interested in redemption, EVEN BETTER. I think this lil' gal would literally burst with joy.

Would ask you lots of questions about the human world and listen with curiosity, since she didn't have a chance to be a human herself.

She'll probably recruit you to help her with hotel stuff, making an use of your lively personality to encourage potential residents to stay at the hotel, if you want.

Doesn't think much of your style, but she likes the variety of colours. It seems very refreshing to her.

About you liking physical touch: she will gladly let you hug her or something, she'll reciprocate happily. She really likes how your fur feels too!

Your relationship with your friend reminds her of hers with Vaggie a little.

I can actually see you becoming good friends!

Now, Vaggie probably likes you, because her girlfriend likes you, at first, let's be real haha

The first thing that will stand out to her is your looks. In her mind, it tells a lot about people. And you made a really friendly impression, despite sharing looks with a tiger, which is a generally dangerous animal.

But you are far from dangerous and that's what she likes about you.

At first, her and Charlie will be hesitant to allow you and your friend to go out much, because they are scared of you getting into trouble, since you just arrived at hell and aren't used to rules prevailing there, but eventually they will stop babying you two.

If she sees someone being mean or potentially trying to hurt you, she'll step in and protect you, mainly for Charlie's sake.

She doesn't want any new residents getting killed even before the chance to get redeemed.

Will probably get a little jealous if you're getting physical with Charlie, but if you gain her trust, she'll stop.

If you want to hug her, she'll accept, although she isn't that much of a touchy person as Charlie is.

Thinks your style is an eye-strain, but won't tell you that EVER. She believes that everyone should dress how they want.

Just like Charlie, your relationship with your friend reminds her of their dynamic.

Let's be honest, Alastor is an enigma when it comes to people.

You cannot immediately see what he thinks based on his reactions or expression.

I think that the first thing he would notice about you is your smile, if you actually are smiling. He appreciates people that wear it frequently. Otherwise he wouldn't care.

Just as he does to every resident: he would pity you and your friend. He also isn't so fond of new sinners and you aren't an exception.

Would probably warm up to you if you're cheerful. You might annoy him if you're too noisy, though.

As a jerk that he is, he would probably try to bullshit you into thinking some random untrue stuff about hell.

"Yes, my dear. Here in hell, we don't eat anything except our victim's flesh."

You would believe him and be scared shitless.

Charlie reassures you he was only making fun of you and scolds him afterwards, though.

He would absolutely not allow you to touch him. If you'd be trying to hug him, he'll probably step away from you, making you fall on your face. (I'm so sorry for this part, I needed to write it, it was just too funny HAHAHAH)

As for you and your friend's relationship, he couldn't care less. He thinks you're equal to each other.

Okay, now Husk's reaction is…

Nonexistent.

The first thing he would notice is that you're… Oh you're a tiger demon. He would raise his stupidly large eyebrow at this. Overall not much of a reaction. Wouldn't even say hi to you.

At first he wouldn't be a fan of your lively attitude, since he can't match your level of enthusiasm. But I mean I guess he'd think that's good for you.

After some time, though, he would warm up to you, since you're relatively friendly. Wouldn't mind hearing you yap for hours at the bar. He's used to it.

If you grow on him, he might start getting overprotective with you, especially when around Alastor.

He doesn't want you to end up like him, especially if you don't know what you're doing, yet.

(Alastor might purposely anger him by getting closer to you.)

He isn't a big fan of physical touch, either. If you hug him, he might get startled at first, but wouldn't mind. He won't hug you back, though.

Probably thinks your style is an eyesore like Vaggie, but wouldn't tell you, too. I mean he's not exactly the right person to judge.

Out of you two, he can relate to your friend most. Doesn't think of your dynamic that much.

Oh god this little gremlin…/a

Her first impression of you would probably be that you brought too much dirt after yourself.

Couldn't care less about where you come from, how you look and act if you're not a handsome bad boy.

At least at first.

Would notice you and your lively attitude if you respond to her chaotic behaviour positively.

You two would be an iconic, hyperactive duo. Charlie and Vaggie would literally have to stop you two from your shenanigans.

She would climb up your head or your shoulder randomly.

Would probably chomp your hand if you tried to hug her, but then give you the best small hug ever.

Loves your choice of clothing so much that when she cleans, she might steal your shirt and use it as a dress.

Okay, this guy is absolutely unhinged, as we know...

The first thing he notices is your fur, he thinks it's really nice and would probably try to pet you.

Will probably jokingly flirt with you at first. 

Would actually pity you and your friend, but it's not the same pity as Alastor's, he genuinely feels bad for you two, because he knows how terrifying it is to feel out of place in hell. You might do some things you're gonna regret for the rest of your afterlife...

That's why he silently assures you're not going near Val or the other V's, EVER.

Especially considering your friendly personality.

He likes that you're very lively, at least there is someone in this place with whom he can cause mischief and annoy the shit out of every resident.

Would try to annoy you, but fail miserably, and you probably end up annoying him instead. (Don't worry he still likes you)

Absolutely ADORES your sense of style, probably dresses you up and goes shopping for clothes with you.

He loves physical touch too! Would randomly lean on you or pat you on the head. If you try to hug him, he'll happily oblige and you'll get the absolute best hug ever. Out of everyone in the hotel, he is the best hugger, you can't tell me otherwise haha

Overall I can see that you'll get along pretty well!

Add. Notes: Hope you liked these little headcanons slash reactions idk what this is anymore, but yeah! If you enjoyed, don't be shy, repost and let me know in the comments, they are greatly appreciated! See you in the next one, darlings 🫶

[chaifootsteps]

What if Stella and Blitz met Martha and Mayberry? The ex wives and the mistresses.

Ms Mayberry would know all about hiring hitmen on cheaters and Martha would understand what causes people to cheat in a loveless marriage with kids, they’d both help Stella to move on from it and for her (and the extremely stolas obsessed biassed audience) to learn she’s not crazy (at least by hells standards) Maybe they look at Blitz being mad at Stella for hiring a hitman and laugh because he’s one himself who Mayberry hired. Learning that could change Stella’s view of him. Martha like blitz seems to ping pong between men, before finding the right person (woman) for her. Imagine a scene of “how did you know they were the one?” I love those. Or in Blitzs case “how did you know he is not the one?” Hint: him being on the phone to that creep while being shot at by Martha then stolas shaming blitz to fail to cater to his safety. Stolas is the reason Martha caught him remember. Please blitz remember.

Both sinner women tell them that a man willing to humiliate them and bring them into a cheating scandal does not truly care for or respect them, much less “love” He cares about himself only, and not either of them. In fact he wants them to fight each other. To take blame off him.

Another slightly random thing I was thinking, what if Martha was a huge horse girl too. And dreamed of the wrath ring and meeting hell horses and Satan himself. Blitzø is super stoked about this. He says he descended from Satan as his hellborn and flirtily asks Martha “maybe you should be worshipping me? We’re practically the same” Before Mayberry smacks him and Stella fact checks that assessment. Stick to horses Blitzø.

Another sweet idea, Mayberry has full shared custody of Martha’s evil cannibal children and loves being around kids again. And teaching. As a teacher she finally helps Blitzø learn to spell and read properly, and doesn’t make fun of him for it. But does put him in the dunce hat for cussing. She notices his dyslexia right away and is actually helping him, and maybe notices he grew up speaking multiple languages adding to his spelling difficulty (but Ofc Viv wouldnt do that, everyone in HB speaks exclusively English) I’m tired of the audience calling him stupid. Stella too, she received no education as a woman without official status besides baby maker, and imagine how hard that is to admit?

Basically the message is bad actions have consequences, but good actions have consequences too. Apologies aren’t just meaningless. Every year the three send gift baskets. Blitzø doesn’t say it aloud. But being around three motherly women who understand him, helps him in his grieving journey quite a bit. And to be less of a misogynist. All he had to do was give a sorry basket and he just made three close friends.

You guys are going to kill me with all these beautiful, sincere versions of HB that we'll never see so much as a shade of in canon.

[mysticcollectionbee]

Just a random thought I had: I would really like to see Carmilla and Alastor interact more in the future seasons. I don't think people realize how weird it is that Carmilla put Alastor on the Board of Overlords and how interesting their business dynamic could be. Carmilla, lady of order and professionalism...Put ALASTOR in a meeting room. I get inviting him to join because respect (and probable fear of this mysterious guy who has been killing your associates deciding to kill YOU out of disrespect), but...After you realize he doesn't take anything about being an Overlord that serious why do you keep inviting him??? He'll keep coming because he might get entertainment and useful info out of it but what does Carmilla get out of him being there?

My best idea is that maybe he kinda works as a fail-safe in case somebody tries to start a physical fight or something. Alastor clearly enjoys any excuse to kill and eat people so that could work for that. And everyone in that room knows he's capable of killing them but doesn't. So they might use that evidence as to why they should respect the rules of the meeting and Carmilla, because the Radio Demon respects it.

But the last part is 90% a bluff. Alastor doesn't respect nor care about the board of Overlords whatsoever. He might have mild respect for Carmilla, because he seems to like women more than men and atleast pretends to respect her position among the overlords. But they probably dislike interacting with each other. Carmilla has to deal with him not taking anything she cares about when it comes to their profession and title seriously, his enjoyment of chaos probably getting in the way of their meeting occasionally (She probably saw or atleast later on heard from Zestial about Alastor bringing an Egg boi to the meeting), and the biggest issue for her: Deal with a person who constantly has or had KILLED YOUR ASSOCIATES and broadcasts it. Add to the fact that Alastor is probably a bit hard to predict because he can switch from goofy and charismatic radio show host to The sadistic and calculating Radio Demon very quickly.

On Alastor's side: Here's a person who thinks they're wiser than him and believes there should be order to owning souls and territory when all he seems to care about is doing what HE wants and HIS version of control on things. She's passive aggressive or atleast snarky to him as retaliation for his unprofessionalism and to keep his ego in his check. And overall, Alastor probably sees her as a stick in the mud trying to ruin his sadistic fun.

But they still respect each other while disliking each other (Kinda like how you might have a coworker who gets his work done and is useful to the group...But whose personality you can't stand) . Carmilla probably respects Alastor's power and his role in keeping the Overlords in check (I don't think she would be able to make an Board of Overlords if there were so many of them and some of them might've wanted to kill her for trying to "boss them around"). Alastor probably respects how much of a smart professional she is, her ability to lead and try to control the group she made, and her being a dutiful mother (Remember Al is canonically a mama's boy and according to old canon feels like a surrogate father or atleast responsible for Niffty in a similar way despite her age). So yeah, I need to see them interact more. I want to see their first interaction (How did Carmilla react to finding out the mysterious voice on the radio was some red deer guy who makes cannibal puns?). Has Carmilla ever tried to subtly suggest certain Overlords Alastor should target next? Would Alastor hear her out or just ignore it?

Anyways, that's my thought about it. Both of them are now kinda allies to the hotel (specifically Vaggie) so it would be nice to see them interact more.

[dragoncityinteriordesign]

Hey, Guardian fans! Got something here you might like!

And that something would be Kaleidoscope of Death (the 2018 gay webnovel) and the Spirealm (the 2024 drama based on it). You can read the more detailed rec posts for both Kaleidoscope of Death and the Spirealm (as well as for some other media, all of which you can read here), but I wanted to come in and do a specific post about why I think fans of Guardian would really have a good time with these two.

This isn't just my observation -- other people who are fans of both have commented on how they scratch the same itch. They're just similar enough to one another to feel familiar, which still different enough that nothing feels repetitive/derivative. It's also funny to me how much the relationship of Guardian the book to Guardian the show is like the relationship of Kaleidoscope of Death to the Spirealm. They're both spooky gay stories that lose a lot in the adaptation to television, but also gain a lot in the process, until it's hard to say which one is the superior telling of the story.

So I'm coming in here with an extremely quick, spoiler-free-as-I-can-make-them five reasons why fans of Guardian in particular might be inclined to enjoy this book/show combo.

1. These boys are not normal about one another

I know you love it when the boys are not normal about one another. Ruan Nanzhu (cunty, well-dressed, on the left) and Lin Qiushi (sporty, cat dad, on the right) are extremely not normal about one another.

(Guardian lucked out in that when the drama was made, shows hadn't yet started doing the bullshit of changing the danmei boys' TV names. Zhao Yunlan and Shen Wei are Zhao Yunlan and Shen Wei no matter where they are -- but these two are Ruan Nanzhu and Lin Qiushi in the book, and Ruan Lanzhu and Ling Jiushi in the show. I'm going to be using their book names just because I've seen them written more often and they look more correct to me now.)

There's a Reason they're together. Maybe they don't go back as far as Ye Olde Haixing, but rest assured theirs is not a random encounter. Also, just like in Guardian, the Reasons in the book and the show have some surface similarities, but play out very differently.

This is a slow-burn gay love story that's a freak4freak relationship featuring two completely different kinds of freak. Lin Qiushi is the only person Ruan Nanzhu's ever let get close to him. Ruan Nanzhu's the only person who's ever pierced Lin Qiushi's cat-loving veil of obliviousness. Theirs is the true love of being willing to burn down the world for the same person you love annoying the pants off of. They're hot-and-cold messes who can't live without one another.

Obviously, as in Guardian's case, the boys-kissing parts are textual only in the book, not in the show. But keeping them from kissing actually ends up making them way less normal about one another. Yes, tell the guy who's technically your boss to platonically call you "daddy." What's not heterosexual about that?

2. Fun horror(-ish)

Both books have fantastic worlds and weird metaphysical conflicts, where terrible and unsettling things happen. They have ghosts and ghost-like things that can scare you and even kill you. Both contain some really unsettling passages about gore, violence, and body horror, and both include at least a bit of background cannibalism from one of the party members.

...And both shows have had those elements totally nerfed by censorship. Just as the ghosts of Diyu become the aliens of Dixing, the mysterious door worlds of Kaleidoscope of Death become the eeeeevil American video game of the Spirealm. It's exactly as silly and nonsensical as it sounds, and I know you can laugh your way through how stupid the adaptation choices are, because you already have.

Does this destroy the horror of it? Eh, yes and no. No, because there are still fundamentally some horror-esque things going on. But also yes, because having all these killer doors be part of a video game is about as nonsensical as having a lot of aliens living in the center of the earth, and it all winds up being a bit ... well, silly. At least Guardian had the excuse of having to do a last-minute scramble; the Spirealm was committed to this from the start. (What the Spirealm also has that Guardian the show lacks is the occasional hilarious, perfunctory digression into how eeeeeeevil capitalism is, which is its own form of both cringe and comedy.)

The book is legitimately creepy, though. There were a couple points I found myself reading it late at night, right before going to bed, and thinking, hm, maybe I should not be doing this. I love it so much that I actually read it the first time, got to the very important information in the first extra, turned right around, and read it a second time with that new context. It's not so horror that a casual reader couldn't enjoy it, but maybe leave the lights on while you do.

3. We're not co-workers, we're found family.

You know how the SIU/SID crew is the best and the most wonderful and you want to pick them up and hug them all and put them in your pocket and carry them around with you? Yeah, it's likely you're going to have a similar reaction to the Obsidian members and their associated friends.

Both SIU/SID and Obsidian have similar qualities where they're organizations operating under the radar of normal society, doing jobs that do not respect 9-5 boundaries or lunch breaks, where things are dangerous enough that you have to trust your co-workers with your life on a very regular basis. But while only the Guardian ghosts live at headquarters, everyone in Obsidian shares the same house. They eat meals together, watch movies together, play board games together, hang out and read in the TV pit together, decorate the house for New Year's together, barge into one another's rooms together...

Did you love it when Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan wound up living in apartments conveniently across the hall from one another? You're likely going to feel a similar kind of way when Ruan Nanzhu immediately moves Lin Qiushi (and his cat!) into the bedroom across the hall from his own.

As with Guardian, the book has more characters than the show does, but that's because it's cheaper to write a new character than it is to hire a new actor. And it's also easier to write off a new character than it is to get rid of a main cast member, so the book and the show have slightly different lists of who lives and who dies, and when. Take my "be careful who you get attached to" warning seriously.

4. A similarly batshit television aesthetic

Okay, okay, so nothing will ever be like Guardian's thrift-store maximalist approach to set dressing. The Spirealm is more intentional about its choices, and less like all it can afford to do is to keep reusing the same dozen objects repositioned slightly. The Spirealm is what it looks like when you actually have all the money you need and still choose to decorate like Guardian did.

Because of the story's supernatural main conceit, a lot of the environments are bizarre, impossible worlds that do not rely much on petty little things like logic or accuracy or the laws of physics. They're basically dreamscapes, filled with things that don't make sense but also don't have to.

The whole thing is also beautifully shot. I know that a lot of the screenshots emphasize the extremely yellow Wong Kar-wai color grading that I honestly wish weren't there, but it's fine in context. Really, the framing, the motion of the camera, the composition of scenes -- it's just all lovely. I've been watching it with no sound or subtitles on to do screenshots, and I keep being astonished by how nice it is to just look at.

Shen Wei's clothing choices seem tame compared to the high strangness Ruan Nanzhu considers fashion. He'll see your arm garters and raise you a coat that somehow has three lapels. No, I don't know how it works either. But if you like seeing a beautiful bitchy man in bizarre outfits (and I know you do), the Spirealm's got you covered.

And are there inexplicable English-titled books, both generically fake and perplexingly real? Baby, you know there are.

The Spirealm's set design is ultimately not nearly as interesting as Guardian's is, but it's definitely more engaging than most. If you (like me!) enjoy pausing and squinting at the backgrounds of shots, this will bring you hours of scrutinizing entertainment.

5. Not not the same endings

By this I mean, the end of Guardian the book is to the end of Guardian the show as the end of Kaleidoscope of Death is to the end of the Spirealm. I don't mean the exact same things happen, and I can't tell you exactly what happens without spoiling some major things I don't think should be spoiled. What I do mean is that they feel very similar in the relationship between source and adaptation.

Now that I've said this, you're going to be thinking, oh, I know how it ends! No, I promise, you really don't. But when you finally experience said endings, you're going to understand what I mean. Xi Zixu, writing Kaleidoscope of Death in 2018, could not have been responding to the ending of Guardian the show, which was airing at the same time the novel was being released. However, I'd be willing to put down a not-small amount of money that the production team on the Spirealm was at least passingly familiar with Guardian. I don't think it's accurate to say the Spirealm's ending is a direct response to Guardian the show's ending, but I do believe it understands that it's contributing to a conversation to which the endings of both Guardian versions already belong.

And that's all I'm going to say about that! You'll get it when you get there.

bonus: kitty!

This is Chestnut. Chestnut is perfect.

I find it charming how much Xi Zixu, the author, loves cats. She talks about her cat in her author's notes. She waxes poetic about how great cats are in the prose. She has obviously chosen to make Lin Qiushi a cat dad for reasons of writing her own favorite personal traits onto her blorbos.

Of course Ruan Nanzhu is jealous of a cat. He's jealous of himself. He's a one-man jealousy machine when it comes to Lin Qiushi's affections. He's being so normal right now.

Have I convinced you?

Scroll down to the bottom of the rec posts I mentioned earlier to find all the information you need to read Kaleidoscope of Death and all the information you need to watch the Spirealm.

My final verdict is that Guardian the show is substantially better than the Spirealm, and Guardian the book is also better than Kaleidoscope of Death -- but by a much, much narrower margin. I don't even have strong feelings about which one of them you should experience first; I actually started the show, jumped to the book, read it while I was watching the middle episodes, and then finished the show, and even that broken-ass order was not a bad way to approach them. But be prepared to do both! You'll want to do both. Trust me.

Anyway, after you're done watching/reading, come find me at @thirteenthdoor, which is where I'm putting all my Kaleidoscope of Death/Spirealm analysis, reblogs, and shitposting. But only after, because I'm not being careful about spoilers at all over there.

See you in the doors!

[katyakurae]

My, my, what a charming place is this Hazbin Tavern of yours! A DnD AU

Random headcanons under the cut!

Race: Winter Eladrin

Class: Mage, school of Divination.

Alignement: True neutral

Rosie has her tower and lives in Waterdeep, but she travels to the Underdark from time to time to visit Alastor. (He may be banned from Waterdeep)

They're besties.

Finds Hazbin Tavern idea fun, but doesn't want to get involved. Charlie's wild magic unsettle her.

She is really sweet to Charlie, tho, and has offered her guidance.

Knows Alastor has some kind of secret agenda, but she doesn't asks questions. She just wants to chill and mess with her magic in her tower.

A while ago, she found a Bhaalist cult and joined them for fun and to study their magic. Then she met Alastor, who was doing more or less the same. When they got bored after a few rituals, they left... by murdering the whole cult. Bhaal was not entirely unpleased.

Rosie and Alastor wear similar silver jewerly. This is because, after the Bhaalist fiasco, they went shopping (they looted the ones they just murdered AND ate)

So yeah, she is still a cannibal. Kinda... Does it count when you're not the same race as your dinner?

She is quiet about it, tho, since she has an image to keep in the wizard community.

Since she is a Divination mage, Rosie has seen some worrisome prophecies regarding a Wild Magic Sorceress, an Aasimar and a (ex?) Selûnite, but she is keeping that to herself for now at least.

Previous character: Niffty!

Next character: Adam

[mariamakeslemons]

Task Force 141 movie killer types

I have no excuse, I'm still on my horror movie/CoD kick and I needed to make this to compliment my 70's horror stereotype lists for 141, Canon, and Non-canon.

We now have Canon and Non-canon killers!

Price is reminiscent to Hannible, albeit without the cannibalism. He wants people to be respectful, and polite members of society. What makes him "evil" is that he doesn't pause to see if it's just a bad day or if his victim is just a rude little shit. As an ex-Captain, he expects respect and he can kill the rude bastards easily, without a trace.

The Final Girl (which I'm going to use more as a title than a gendered term) is meets all his parameters of an "unobjectionable". When he finally gets them, he's going to either play as their savior or keep them as his.

Gaz is a best friend killer. Not a killer of best friends, but the best friend of the Final Girl and a killer. He's possessive of them, to the point of having killed someone when they were pre-teens. He gets away with how unhinged he is by abusing his good looks and doe-eyed abilities.

The Final Girl is his. His best friend, his future spouse, his significant other, his. His plans are to pin all the killing on any other love interest of his pretty baby. No one will take them from him.

Soap is a spree killer. His kills are sporadic and completely random, only controlled by his knowledge of societal rules. Meaning, he's dragging his victim away from the light to kill them. Finds it fun to have a chase and surprise his victims.

Final Girl puts up the fight of his dreams. They fend him off and give him a true chase through the city. Soap plans to catch them and keep them until their fight is completely out of them. Might even keep them past that if they're good for him. After all, they're pretty enough.

Simon is a territory killer. If someone comes into the part of the woods that he's claimed, he hunts them down and kills them. He has traps all throughout his area, all to make the more innocent people die quicker. He is "kind" by spreading a legend about his part of the woods, encouraging the "good" people to stay away.

Similar to Soap, Simon likes Final Girl's fight. However, he becomes obsessive of them, wanting to clip their wings and keep them in a nice little cage. Make them truely his.

[a-hazbin-reader]

Can I please request a Vox x Female Childish Reader just like the meme that goes...

Random Imp: Hey! Some dude is jumping going off to the bungee swing backwards!

Vox who was currently talking to the other 2 V's: Hah, What an idiot

Female Reader: I'M GOING OFF THE BUNGEE SWING BACKWARDS!!!

Vox: Oh no...THAT'S MY IDIOT!!!

I'm up for any ask that gives Vox a headache

Vox X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: None?? I think?? Cartoonish scenarios??

Description: ☝️⬆️

You are so goofy and childish and it's one of the reasons Vox actually fell in love with you

It's so refreshing to have someone who's always looking for fun things to do in Hell instead of being miserable or scared

When he first met you, he assumed you were just stupid, watching you run from a group of hungry cannibals while calling it tag

Almost considered leaving you to your fate but something about the way you squealed in excitement as they caught up to you made his heart flip

So he reluctantly saves you and you've become a thorn in his side ever since

A thorn that he's come to love and look forward to seeing every day, often wishing he could just blow off work to spend time with you

Literally does everything you want to do, even at the price of his own pride, that's how whipped Vox is for you

You wanna play the floor is lava?? He's jumping on the nearest piece of furniture and trying to knock you off your perch

You're playing hide and seek?? Fine! Vox is roping in the other V's and he's literally tearing apart everything to find your ass

How tf did you get INSIDE the couch!?!?!

He's in a meeting with the other overlords and you suddenly start a game of Duck Duck Goose, picking him as the goose???

You bet your ass Vox is chasing after you like you owe him money, the others just watching in bewilderment

You start a pillow fight?? He's going to start a pillow WAR

He wants to fucking WIN

Literally adores your childish nature but won't admit it to anyone, no matter how obvious it is

On the other hand...

You fucking stress him out sometimes, getting yourself into the strangest situations

Vox once caught you playing hopscotch with Alastor, winner gets to keep your soul

WHY DID YOU AGREE TO THAT

Relax Voxie~ I won anyways~

You get yourself into a game of musical chairs with a humongous dinosaur demon??

Vox is still having nightmares of you being squashed by that gigantic ass 😒

One of the worst things you've ever done to him is video call him while you're about to do a bungee jump

He was stuck discussing business with the other V's when you suddenly appear on his phone, immediately cheering him up

What could his cute Y/N want now~?

"Hey Voxie~! I'm about to jump off this bridge and do a flip! I want you to watch me!!"

"You're gonna WHAT!?"

Nearly short circuits right then and there, his screen glitching out from the sudden wave of stress

He zaps your way the moment he sees that you're jumping, grabbing the bungee rope and pulling you up with his own two hands

Vox ignores all your whining and pouting over him spoiling your fun, pulling you into his arms and shaking from the adrenaline rush

You are just so confused, you were only having fun...it's his fault for being so busy all the time that you get bored

He's still trying to get his breathing back to normal when he suddenly touches foreheads with you

He squishes your cheeks together and gives you a tired look

"You...are not leaving our bedroom for the rest of the week..."

"Voxie!! That's no fair!!"

I hope this is what you wanted!! I had so much fun writing it!

[liverwisteria]

LAUGHING JACK HEADCANONS

General Headcanons! And silly things. Wisteria doesn’t know how to word things.

- Laughing Jack has a lanky build, he’s 7’4 and his age is unknown. He does physically look like he’s in his 30’s or 40’s though.

- He’s an asexual aromantic clown.

- His Birthday is on December 24th! Christmas Eve! Born somewhere in the 1800’s.

- Originally, he was made to be a guardian of sorts. Was made by an Angel that sent him to a troubled boy in hopes the clown could give him some fun and protect the boy. Only things didn’t go as planned…and so now he’s a demonic clown.

- Buttt that’s for a separate Wisteria post!

- His color scheme is black and white! There’s no other color he’ll wear. Or get near…he hates every other color in the rainbow. Thinks they’re boring and not fun!

- His room in the Slendermansion is a gigantic circus tent. Everything is in black and white, like it’s some old film. But In the middle of his room is his box! He’s Jack In The Box! Hahah.

- His box is connected to him, which means he won’t die until the box is destroyed. And let me tell you, it is extremely difficult for that box to be destroyed. It was made by an Angel after all.

- He’s able to go into the box, it’s like his own pocket dimension. He stores random items in there.

- Has eaten the staue of liberty

- Wisteria doesn’t know how to explain this. Wisteria will just say this is a canon event in a rp. Which is canon in my universe.

- Wisteria will go into more detail about this on another post. Wisteria promises.

- He has rainbow blood, only it’s a dull shade of the rainbows. No he’s not made out of stuffing in Wisterias AU…the clown has organs and guts and rainbow blood.

- The blood doesn’t do anything, it’s just unique.

- He has swirls in his eyes that is constantly spiraling around, the more strong his emotions are the more they spiral. They don’t affect his vision at all.

- Is it cannibalism is you’re a demonic clown?

- Well anyways. Laughing Jack is a cannibal clown demon that kills and tortures children. Errrmmm yeah. He eats organs and guts too.

- His favorite foods are organs, guts, and MANGOSSSS!!!

- He can’t eat too much human food, or else he ends up violently puking everywhere.

- More on the children killing thing. He pretends to be the child’s friend, promising them he’ll protect them. Saying they’re best friends! Earning the child’s trust, before betraying them and killing them. He makes the child go insane, isolates them from their friends and family.

- He has a lot of abilities. Ones that are very powerful. Only he doesn’t use these to do anything useful, he just uses them in order to mess with the other proxies living in the mansion or to mess with the child he’s planning to kill.

- He likes messing with people that just who Laughing Jack is. Occasionally he’ll juggle around the mansion until someone notices. He’ll keep adding items until people notice him. And if they don’t he throws the items at the first person he sees.

- Elf ears! Which means super hearing! Which means he can’t be around loud noises— EXCEPT he’s gotten himself used to loud sounds, by being loud himself. So they don’t hurt his ears as much anymore.

- He has giant claws for fingers so he can’t hold things properly. Or he’ll have to like pinch an item to hold it, everything is so small compared to himself.

- In my AU he does know William Grossmen and Frankie The Undead! He goes over to their apartment every weekend to see how things are going. He ignores Frankie— no…he FORGETS Frankie is Will’s roommate. ‘Cause he doesn’t really care for the zombie. He’s only there to see William.

“William who is this zombie you have here?”

“That’s Frankie, my roommate?”

“…OOOOHHHHH!”

- LJ sometimes mistakes William for Issac. He just looks so much like Issac to LJ. When that does happen he stares at William just to realize that he’s not Issac. He has to remember that Issac is gone.

- But he just laughs it off and goes back to doing whatever.

This is all Wisteria has for now! Wisteria will post more headcanons for characters heh. heh. heh.

- Wisteria Out!

[gertritude-art]

mordred core dare i say

So I was going to write up a fake AITA post in response to this, but instead I just got really into the idea of mordred arguing with people in the comments of it (examples shown below):

---

"Have I been an "asshole" for belittling my peer over her religious beliefs?" discussion

Flyguyy posted: YTA. Even if you think they're stupid, it's never okay to make fun of someone for their religion.

Dawinniwad replied: NTA. It's always okay to make fun of someone for their religion, especially if you think it's stupid.

destineystreamer replied: ATY. It's always okay to think someone is stupid, especially if you're making fun of their religion.

polarbear378 replied: YAN. It's never okay to think someone is religion, even if you're making fun of their stupid.

XXXDemonLordXXX (OP) replied: I wrote this with the intent of generating a serious discussion. Either take my question seriously or don't bother commenting.

---

NormieGuy posted: ESH. You shouldn't have made fun of her, but getting called a "demon-worshipping heathen" is kind of crazy and deserves a comeback imo.

XXXDemonLordXXX (OP) replied: I made fun of her because she said my desires are foolish, not because of that. Do not spread misinformation on this post.

NormieGALhastagfeminism replied: INFO. What were your desires? You didn't mention those in the post?

XXXDemonLordXXX (OP) replied: It's to become a demon and cannibalize this wretched earth. (-200 karma, 27 comments)

--

Formaldehype posted: Isn't this the kid who got banned from r/askDocs for cutting out and posting an uncensored pic of his eye?

nick555 replied: He what

XXXDemonLordXXX (OP) replied: This isn't relevant to my question.

---

jellyRoll posted: Hey this guy's entire post history is him arguing in the demonology forums and rping as though he's going through a demonic possession, maybe we shouldn't enable him here in the comments? He's clearly got some problems

DemonExpertSwag replied: Demons can't even possess people. This kid's mom needs to come and get him off the internet lol

XXXDemonLordXXX (OP) replied: Demons can absolutely possess people, and if you mention my mother one more time I'll report you to the moderators, swine. How you claim to be an "expert" when your comment history indicates you can't even tell a demonic coil from a spring is a sign that the whole demonic community is going to the dogs.

---

Mrs-Baggins posted: INFO. OP, who is your acquaintance that's "of an unknown age and male" who told you that you may have hurt her feelings? Are they a family friend of yours? Maybe it would be better to talk to an adult about this than post about it to a random internet forum.

XXXDemonLordXXX (OP) replied: I apologize for the confusion on this matter. He's a cowardly demon who lives inside of my right eyeball. As he does not know how old he is, and ages are a customary addition on reddit, I thought it best to indicate such rather than leaving it out or guessing.

Mrs-Baggins replied: What?

XXXDemonLordXXX (OP) replied: As I just said, he's a cowardly demon who lives inside my right eyeball. Is anyone here capable of understanding basic English, or must I dumb it down more for you peons? (-700 karma, 500 comments)

[mortuary-maggots]

HIYA SO THIS IS KASPER (ik its spelled diff in the pics i only changed it recently :sob:) he's my creepypasta oc :D usually he wears like average blue jeans and a brown/green shtriped turtleneck like in the last image kinda ? and green converse with like beads or drawings on them :D personality: Hates physical contact unless he initiates or very much trusts you, in which case he's always finding little ways to have contact; brushing their hand, tail wrapped around their wrist, hand on shoulder, bumping shoulders, ect. he cant get enough of it. Also just generally dislikes people (that he doesnt know/isnt comfy with) but can mask his hate pretty well and gives respect (with a side of sarcasm) where respect is due. Harsh and truthful, will not be afraid to get in your face and tell you how shit is as he sees it or just straight up insult you. If he's chill with you, he'll be pretty playful or sarcastic but can be ticked off or triggered somewhat easily. When he's on his own he's usually pretty relaxed and creative, a lot less prickly than when he's around people. he's pretty energetic and a bit of a trickster, a huge fan of pranks, he's a sarcasm lord and honestly pretty fun to be around if you can match his energy and keep up with his quips and jokes. if not, you're bound to get tired of him quick. he CAN be serious, but mostly only if he's in a fight and losing or if he's pissed off about something, in which he tends to lash out and say literally whatever he's thinking, be it brutal honesty about how he feels in the moment, how he thinks of someone or just random phrases and words that fly across his mind. any other time would be if he was comforting someone, in which case he turns into a big ole lovebug and does whatever he can to make them feel better. despite being such a yapper all the time he's a great listener too, and gives some pretty solid advice when he can. he canonically has a whole slew of issues including ptsd, anxiety, depression, autism, AND derealization/dissociation, coupled along with experiencing hallucinations, which is part of the reason that before he joined the mansion he was extremely wary of slenderman, less so because he was SLENDERMAN but moreso because he thought he was simply another hallucination. his backstory is located here , and while i need to adjust the writing bc i did it when i was like half sleep deprived its still accurate to his character. he is a cannibal and experiences blackouts if he goes too long without feeding, which send him into a basically unreachable state of rage and hunger. he's.. basically decimated a town or two thanks to this, because when he first realised he had to eat human meat to sustain himself he really didnt want to all that much and tried to avoid it until he realised just how dangerous that was. ANYWAYS YEAH i hope this wasnt too much to read and I HOPE YOU LIKE HIM i made him like right after i joined the fandom and hes probably not all that great in the grand scheme of things but i like him and hes my son and resides in a snowglobe where i shake him around for fun sometimes THATS ALL I HOPE UR DAYS GOING SUPER GOOD

I hope I did him justice!!!