#queerplatonic marriage
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lovesick-ritz · 2 years ago
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We don't talk about platonic marriages enough
I am bisexual. My partner is aroace. We are in a queerplatonic relationship. We have been together for around 4 years and got engaged a little over 2 years ago. We don't do romantic things (we do sometimes, but not usually.) and we don't do sexual things. There's no romance, but we love each other. It is 100% platonic.
But I ALWAYS feel the need to clarify this with people we meet that, it's not "oh haha we were best friends for so long we just decided to get married teehee"
NO
It's still love. We live for each other. We would die for each other. We are attached at the hip. We are each others most important thing in the entire world. Just because we don't kiss or have sex doesn't mean it's not love.
I LOVE my fiance in ways words can't explain. And they love me just the same.
Just because it's not romantic doesn't make it any less of a relationship.
Just because it's not sexual doesn't make us any less engaged.
I am going to marry my fiance, my best friend, the love of my life, and I need people to know that it's not because we couldn't find anyone else. It's not because we said we would if we were still single at X years old. It's not a trend or a phase or anything like that.
I'm going to marry them because I LOVE them.
@novelcain <3
(update since this is gaining traction again: we're married now!! :D)
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dreaming-like-a-girl · 1 year ago
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My queerplatonic partner is the strongest person I know and being with him helps me feel strong too. His arms are home and his hugs are safety. And the best part is I know he finds his strength and home and safety with me too.
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hippolotamus · 5 months ago
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Several Sentence Sunday 📝
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Happy Sunday, lovelies! Barreling on with more you're where I wanna go (i've missed her so much 😭) but going back to 1902 this time (about 10 years before the previous snippet) (all prev snippets and lore here)
One thing Buck hoped for in this escape was a guise of anonymity. At least a chance to put down his society mask. Unfortunately, like tends to attract like and the ‘old money’ set has a way of sniffing each other out. His mother loves it, knowing she can travel anywhere and find the ‘right’ sort of people. Of course that would require that she actually leave Philadelphia, something he’s certain she hasn’t done since arriving there to be married. Buck, on the other hand, tends to find the wealthy dull and repetitive, like a worn out music box. Something about them beautiful, and mostly functional, but their sound is stale and faintly warped from playing the same tune too many times. Even the sons and daughters, closest to his own age, are a bit of a bore. They might emerge from university with new, bold ideas, but those are quickly eroded away as the sons join the family business with a reputation to uphold. The daughters become wives and mothers, replacing every shiny, hopeful dream with the sacred knowledge of hosting tea and making sure the children are well behaved in church on Sundays.
tagged by the always talented @weewootruck @theotherbuckley @bidisasterevankinard @inell @dangerpronebuddie
@bi-buckrights @eddiebabygirldiaz @lonelychicago (i promise i'm getting to all of your undoubtedly amazing snippets!) 💖
np tagging @actuallyitsellie @loveyouanyway @a-noble-dragon @tizniz @diazheartsbuckley
@saybiwithme @shipperqueen6 @ramonaflow @spotsandsocks @stereopticons
@kitteneddiediaz @daffi-990 @diazsdimples @your-catfish-friend @thekristen999
@filet-o-feelings @wikiangela @underwaterninja13 @lizzie-bennetdarcy @rainbow-nerdss
@steadfastsaturnsrings @jesuisici33 @rmd-writes @dr-shortsighted-owl @queerbuckleys
@elvensorceress @giddyupbuck @hoodie-buck @indestructibleheart @ladydorian05
@lemonzestywrites @monsterrae1 @statueinthestone @slightlyobsessedwitheverything @the-likesofus
@thewolvesof1998 @watchyourbuck @welcometololaland @wildlife4life and anyone else who wants to 😘
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a-special-sort-of-soulmate · 6 months ago
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My qpp and i got platonically married.
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That’s amazing! Congrats!💛
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d0omzdayfursuitz · 6 months ago
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Bro the married couple.
This implies that shrek and fiona are queerplatonic. I love that.
You’ve heard of “Every purple character is ace” now get ready for
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incognitopolls · 9 months ago
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We ask your questions so you don’t have to! Submit your questions to have them posted anonymously as polls.
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vaguely-concerned · 6 months ago
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purple hawke who, at malcolm's death, lost not only a father, a mentor, the single most stable and safe point in their world up until this moment. but also the only person in their life who would consistently, gleefully 'yes, and — ' them. the loss, in one fell swoop, of both a beloved parent and your sole willing — no, not only willing, enthusiastic — improv partner. truly, the most unkindest cut of all that the maker could have seen fit to deal. (there's always so much less laughter in the house, after malcolm's gone.)
and then after all the horrors of the blight and trying to make a new life in the shithole turned shithome of kirkwall....... they meet varric. and something that's been slumbering deep within their soul dries a tear of relief and joy and whispers 'oh we are so back'. and they are so right
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quinntism · 9 months ago
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jmtorres · 2 months ago
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*bangs on pots and pans* marry your friends
the united states (and i think many other countries) as well as lotsa companies incentivize marriage. we get significant tax breaks. we get added to a spouse's health insurance plan at low or no cost. I knew someone who got married to a flight attendant to be able to get free flights.
TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE SYSTEM.
if you have a friend you would live with and would trust to get legally entangled with, and neither of you have any plans to get married for romantic love, then make an appointment at the courthouse (iirc it was like $30?) and get married for assorted financial benefits.
signed, I was gonna marry my spouse eventually anyway but I did it on a week's notice so I could get on their health insurance and keep seeing the same therapist when we moved one county over.
(folks on disability, I see you and acknowledge the system does not benefit your marriages. I'm so sorry)
FAQ
What if we need to get divorced? Check that no-fault divorce is available in your area (it's currently standard in the US, but under attack from Republicans). You can also look into annulment if you never screwed (or are both willing to state you didn't). Fill out the paperwork properly and don't misspell anyone's name and it should be pretty easy in most jurisdictions. If you live somewhere without no-fault divorce, one of you commit adultery on camera and that'll usually do it.
Divorce continued: But what about alimony or community property? ok A) I said someone you trust to get legally entangled with B) idk, write a prenup. you technically don't even need a lawyer for this just a notary. C) community property is like. real estate. not furniture. unless and until you're buying property don't worry about that
Won't people question the validity of the marriage? In my experience, no. Insurance might want to see a copy of the marriage license but no one's going to investigate if you're married the "right way" unless this is like a green card situation which A) I'm not qualified to speak on but B) completely falls under the umbrella of my advice to marry your friends for the systemic benefits imo, it's just more complicated, do your own research
What will my parents think? Do you care? I mean. Look, if they're good parents they'll recognize you're doing what's best for you. And you might be surprised at the family stories that come out about who married who for what (I was certainly surprised about the flights one! That was a cousin). If they're shitty parents who weren't accepting your disinterest in romantic marriage in the first place, fuck 'em. Hey, one of the benefits of marriage is your spouse becomes your closest next of kin if you don't want your parents making decisions first you if say, you get in a car accident! This is one of the reasons we fought so hard for same-sex marriage.
I'm polyamorous I can't marry them all! Yeah nope sorry that's rough. Hopefully you're an even-numbered polycule so you can at least all pair off for the tax breaks.
I'm not gay what if people think I'm gay for marrying my same-sex best friend? Who cares? No homo in 2024 really my guy? But also you don't actually have to tell people if you don't want to, you can just say you're roommates. If someone finds out, you can literally just say "we got married for health insurance" you will be amazed how much people are like "oh. huh. that's really smart actually"
Marriage is a sacred rite! I am fully talking about filing government paperwork and if you are unable to separate that from the rituals of your religion, this advice may not be for you.
What if I actually wanted a fancy ceremony though? I mean, no one's stopping you. Send out invitations and a registry. Get those housewares.
Thanks, Anon!
-submit your poll!-
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legokingfisher · 5 months ago
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Perhaps THE funniest thing to me about the teens’ polyamorous space wedding is that like. When they were younger, all their parents told them to stay away from eachother. “No [insert one of the 4 here] you’re not allowed to talk to them you’re not allowed to play with them stay away from them.” But then they do the absolute furthest thing from staying away from each other: getting fucking MARRIED
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d0omzdayfursuitz · 10 months ago
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As a community, we need to bring back queerplatonic relationships. Yeah, they're married. Maybe one of them is aroace and sex repulsed, maybe they hate eachother. Maybe they're both father figures to the same kid and they have to deal with it. Maybe the most logical situation is to just marry eachother and get it over with.
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heavenintheclouds · 5 months ago
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Okay so marriage. I've always dreamed of marriage as a kid just the basic stuff but growing up it just made less to me , it's just a union of two people, a party a priest/imam/ rabbi or just the mayor for non- religious people . There's nothing more than that just two people in love and the rest , feel weird first of all why ultimately love and not something that is deeper and maybe just transcend the norms , that we can't put into words . Why it's always people who feel love as lovers that get married when in reality where all kinda married with every person we know . Hear me out , let's take friendship, you bound yourself with someone deeply, you have a commitment and you love them platonically, that is theoretically a marriage ( I mean we don't have a religious person that says your committed together forever but y'all get it) . So saying that there could only be a marriage or an union only when two people are in love is not true , As an aromantic person I do wanna get married but not this way that's why I love soul ties it's just a connection simple but so strong , that it's transcending the norms. Idk if y'all get it , or maybe I'm wrong I don't fucking know anymore I'm tired 🧍
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dreaming-like-a-girl · 8 months ago
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how is he so perfect **screams into pillow**
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seaglassdinosaur · 10 months ago
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I know we collectively agree that Hiccup isn’t romantically inclined, and his getting married and having kids didn’t make sense in the epilogue, but consider: Hiccup getting married for political reasons.
It’s a marriage of alliance, which is recognized both by him and his partner, and they enter it without expectations of romantic involvement. Since they’re now married, they live in the same castle, spend time together, and Hiccup finds he really likes his spouse. They’re funny, get along with his friends, and has the same interests and values. They both probably speak multiple languages. She understands why Hiccup is so dedicated to making the Wilderwest better, and holds similar views. She’s a good politician (her job after all, was to be an ambassador). Hiccup likes spending time with them, and the feeling is mutual. They’re not in love, they have their own lives, but they’re dedicated to each other and eventually decide to raise children. They teach their kids how to train hawks and hunt with dragons, riding, history, the Languages, and all the necessary skills of their world. They’re not in love and they’re happy together.
#pushing the aromantic hiccup agenda and also the queerplatonic agenda#as much as the idea of hiccup getting married was always a little off to me it was more the romantic angle#which I why I like the idea of a marriage of alliance and a partner who understands that#and then of course the montage of them being a good team and getting along#and going ‘yeah I like this person. I think this is the person I want to spend my life with.’#also a) a lot of arranged political marriages did have the foreign spouse function as an ambassador#b) polyglot hiccup is canon and I think it would be neat if his spouse was as well. it is a marriage alliance after all.#she isn’t from the small area of berm#(actually give all the Vikings regional accents. I think it’s neat)#c) she/they because I didn’t feel firmly about the partner’s gender and the nords were pretty gender diverse#anyway I think the partner would probably be fond of the library and admire hiccup got it open way back when#get along with Fishlegs and camicazi well enough#and enjoy dramatic stories of their adventures. maybe have some of her own#also: normalize people having their own lives outside their partners. hiccup and they are happy together but also have their own friends#oh and you know hiccup would be a great dad. he loves Stoick but he would so much be the dad he wished he had growing up#are the kids bio related? are they adopted (cast off and No Names)? who knows!#I could build in my head what hiccup’s spouse is like but I’ll leave it here#they exist as we construct them#httyd#httyd books#my post#book!hiccup#hiccup the third#hiccup horrendous haddock iii#book hiccup
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moltengoldveins · 3 months ago
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me: man yknow, I just think the idea of Queerplatonic relationships is amazing. A formal platonic relationship like the formal romantic and sexual relationships that society already acknowledges? With the built-in expectation of devotion and priority given to one’s partner without overriding other partnerships or being sexual? Holy crap that would be amazing??? I’d be able to know when my friendships weren’t just “I am situationally friends with you” and had instead become “I want to on purpose build our relationship further with the expectation of it being at least semi-permanent” just without the romance?? Because there were predetermined rules and ways people communicated about it instead of just Not Talking About It? Hell yeah??!! I’d love to be I one of those! Man I wish people communicated about stuff like this properly.
Brain: aight bet. Talk to your friend about wanting to be in a qpr. Talk about what you want that to mean. They brought it up first you have ample opportunity. Bring it up when you see them. Reblog the post they mentioned it in. Talk to them about it.
Me: ………………………………………………………………………………………….….. I would rather die
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needsukunainmymouth · 6 months ago
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Since gay marriage is close to being overturned, anyone down for a lavender marriage? A community/neighborhood of lavender marriages even?
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