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creation-help · 2 years

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[trigger warning for passing mentions of murder... does that count as heavy content?]

could you review the design of my ace attorney ocs?

valerie n. toine used to be a rather successful defense attorney (look on the left with the sweater vest), but after losing a case while trying to defend her fiance who goes on to die in prison, she grows cold and bitter. she becomes a prosecutor (look on the right) and plots her revenge against the man who she deems responsible, which of course in the ace attorney universe means trying to murder someone and falsifying evidence while prosecuting the case. i really wanted her to look sort of romantic and lovecore-y overall, as love is a pretty big part of her story, but obviously she has to look well-put-together and somewhat imposing as well. and i wanted her younger self to look, well, younger and more sweet/care-free.

the second one is a bit of a self insert (and doesnt have a proper reference yet), his name is jack tryles, hes a law student who acts as phoenix wrights co-counsel for a while and who val ends up stabbing in an alleyway lol. he survives though, dont worry. being a self insert his design is kind of whatever i think looks cool than anything too based on his character/story, so id appreciate critique on more of a purely visual standpoint for him.

[Again mentioning that I'm not able to comment on anything regarding the Canon text here, as I'm not familiar with the ace attorney games beyond a pretty surface level]

Valerie N. Toine:

Lemme just say I'm very much enjoying the outfit design here, having her be lovecore aesthetically while her main conflict focuses on, ykno, love, is very cool! The fact that she has an engagement(?)/wedding ring in the Before version, while in the After version it's some other nondescript ring? Mwah. Also I just wanna say, the heart shaped buttons on the jacket, in the After version, wonderful detail. Though this all did make me wonder, what if the After version was more themed around like, heartbreak and grim lovecore instead of the positive kind? Not a criticism by any means, just my suggestion for if you wanted to make the change more dramatic (maybe like adding more black, deep red and wine colors, stuff like that). Depends on if you want a more artistic or realistic impression I think! However the After outfit (hair included!) is very good as is :] also I love how, in the small headshot, her hair is in a heart shaped bun.. Mwah. Again.

In my opinion the design has a good balance with not being too simple and not too complex, and despite what I said about the color scheme earlier I think you did great with darkening the colors on the After outfit, while still keeping energy from the first one. The lessening of white is a nice subtle touch, also, great color planning on your part for making the boots (2nd vers) the same color as her bell bottoms (1st vers)! Just a very cohesive well coordinated color scheme across both iterations. The glasses and the bow staying despite everything keeps a good bit of consistency.

I think you succeeded in having her look like someone to not be taken lightly (2nd vers. Obviously), she definitely looks very formal compared to the first version. More.. Angular, ykno? Mostly thanks to the clothes. I feel like maybe I'd also add something to her Person as well, to signify the change? Due to the art style ofc I can't know if you intended her younger self to look physically younger and springier (this is a reference drawing so I'm not judging that at all), but if not I highly encourage that!

Well put together - absolutely!

Imposing - hmm? I'm not saying she doesn't necessarily look imposing - she very well could depending on how she'd be portrayed visually but mostly, from comparing the two versions I moreso get a sense of "Professionalism vs. Chill and casual", and Mature vs. Carefree, ykno? The sharp shapes in her hair do well to further the more serious and imposing image but I feel like there could be a slight bit more, if you want her to look more intimidating. Unfortunately I'm not sure if I can quite put my finger on it. My overall opinion is that the design is Good, it works, it's cohesive, and I really can't reasonably come up with anything I'd seriously think should be changed. For a very subjective personal take, in my taste, I'd probably make it even more - dramatic, cartoony? Exaggerated?? But, that is all up to how you want to portray her. I personally like to get super into designing something unless I'm intending them to look plain or "normal" (human terms), however take this from someone who primarily does surreal or fantasy (and nonhuman) designs, haha. Really, I think this is great, skilled visual design and honestly I wouldn't say I'm extremely good at outfit design myself so, while adjustments or flavor details could be added - she totally doesn't need them! I honestly could've gone on more about the small details that change between the two versions but I'll just cap this off with saying Great work!

Jack Tryles (Can I just say that last name is so tasty in my mouth. Also is it a.. Pun? Like "trials"??)

Definitely a bit more visually busy, and although it could give off a more messy or chaotic impression I kinda like it. If we compare him to Valerie, she really does come off as very put together and composed. Not that he doesn't, though! Just by comparison.

The fullbody outfit has a fun combination of shapes that give it a good amount of visual variance. There is slight asymmetry with the positioning of the pins and other accessories but he still keeps a fairly professional image - just one that's lots more personalised and customised than Valerie.

I would say, maybe the jacket could also have pinstripes like the pants? I find it a small bit inconsistent with only one of them being pure black. It's not a huge deal to me though, and I'm moreso tilting my head at it than finding it a downside. Just makes it seem that the pants and jacket aren't a part of the same set, if you get me? Though that could also work to establish personality more, like many of the other personalized touches. I think for this design, he has just the right amount of accessories! Not too many not too little. I also love that the soles of the shoes are green! The color scheme is minimal, definitely more reserved, but imo it works for what it's trying to be - which is, I assume, a work outfit.

For me personally I think I might wanna break up the large areas of black, it's just on the cusp of being a bit too much of the same color next to each other but you can again take this as a personal comment. It's just what I think would make it more visually appealing, though I do like black! Maybe you could add a lighter tone of green somewhere?

Still, it works, it's interesting enough to look at, can't find much I'd complain about. Although I think the color planning on Valerie is a bit more engaging since there's more variety of different looking things (like with patterns for example) that still fit together. Still, no complaints as I said. I'm also not sure how much I'd feel appropriate commenting on him considering - self insert, which is meant to moreso reflect on you. I will say, they do look like they fit well into the same story so, good work all around in designing them both together :]

#Oc review #Character design #Character design review #Ask #I hope the commentary was fine!#I'm nervous if it's a bit. Saying alot but not much #Since non fantasy human designs tend to not be my area #By that I mean I've only recently gotten all into that #Maybe I'm just worrying alot since. (glances at my exhaustion lately) so ykno #Enjoy nonetheless!#I honestly couldn't think of that much to critique nor change suggestions on these! You did good!

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funkymbtifiction · 3 years

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Types that desire control over public persona?

I saw an interesting post on social media the other day in which an artist was talking about unsolicited critiques. In a nutshell, the artist seemed to feel that unless a comment was 100% positive it should not be posted because unsolicited suggestions (such as comments on work-in-progress images) were (even if stated with kindness) violations of the artist’s boundaries and could trigger insecurity, anxiety, etc. The artist said if they wanted suggestions they would ask for them, and further said that unsolicited comments do not lead to artistic improvements (implying that artists either ignore them or are unable to implement them).

On the one hand, being a VERY sensitive person myself, easily made anxious about the flaws in my own work (I remember comments made by well-meaning relatives that hurt for a long time), I definitely understand this point of view.

But on the other hand, such a determined policing of what other people are allowed to say seems “wrong” to me. Why not at least be open to their thoughts, as long as they are polite and don’t insist that you “fix” your art to make them happy? I understand preferring to get criticism from a trusted source (I always turn to close friends whenever I need a fresh eye) but still, it doesn’t seem healthy to be unable to take any kind of criticism without becoming significantly depressed.

In a similar vein, sometimes I see people posting things like “If you like/support X then I insist that you unfollow me!” As a Fi-dom my “things I believe are morally wrong” list is quite long so I get that feeling, but I can’t imagine asking anyone to prove they have a right to merely LOOK at anything on a public forum. Again, it feels like a desire to control other people and how they relate to your public persona, which seems pointless to me - I’d rather just try to be as authentic as possible and let them think what they like.

That said, I never offer unsolicited advice to anyone - I’m too afraid of conflict and of hurting them. Heck, even if they ask I’m very, very gentle!

Do you think this might be an P vs J thing? P wanting to keep discussion open and J wanting to focus on what is socially “right”? (The original post felt like an “I need to educate you about good behavior” kind of moment.).

Thank you for your thoughts (and my apologies for being long - I tried to cut it down!)! I hope you had a good weekend and have a great start to your week!

When you share what you create on a public forum of any kind, you open yourself up to criticism. That is unavoidable. By making yourself into a “public figure” and seeking “fame” through what you do, you gain unsolicited critiques. This is part of “fame,” and if you cannot handle it, you shouldn’t seek fame.

I’m not a fan of unsolicited critiques, because it’s rude and most of the time comes down to a personal opinion (not a ‘constructive’ critique) or does not need said. A good artist who works hard to get better is going to figure out how to fix a problem in their art without your help.

However… criticism is how you learn. You can never get better without being willing to consider criticism. I deal with writers a LOT, so I’ll focus on that: the writers who listen to an editor or beta readers improve and become even better. The writers who get defensive and refuse to accept criticism stagnate and never progress pass “basic levels” of talent. So if you are serious about your art, whatever it is, learn to accept criticism as a tool to “help me get better.”

A good artist improves by listening to criticism and deciding if it is valid or a mere opinion. Let’s say an artist is really good, but can’t draw hands well. Someone points it out. The artist can either get defensive, insist they cannot draw hands, and ignore it, thus ensuring that 10 years from now, their hands will still look bad, or they can spend a month drawing nothing but hands until they improve through deliberate practice. Then, their overall art is improved, because they accepted the fact that, “Yeah, hands are hard for me. But I can work on that.”

To some extent, this attitude of “don’t criticize me” comes from the “we are all winners” movement. If you show up, you get a trophy so you don’t feel bad about not winning the soccer match. This, unfortunately, sets up unrealistic expectations about everyone’s “talent” and how the world is going to treat you. The real world does not pull punches. If you cannot take casual criticism as an amateur, you will either never become a “professional” (because your art never improves and you get to known for your “attitude” about criticism) or your first REAL harsh critique will destroy you.

Feeling dominants struggle the most with being unable to handle criticism. Thinkers see criticism for what it is – a tool to help me improve. They are way less sensitive. As a feeler, the only way to grow a thicker skin is to practice taking criticism, remind yourself it’s not about your self-worth, and learn to judge whether this criticism is a point of view or something simple you can learn to improve your art quality (by using your thinking function instead of just going off your emotional reaction to it). Just as an example, I once had a “critique” that said: “Good idea, poorly executed.” That was it. That was not constructive criticism, even though it hurt, because it told me nothing. It could not point out a way to improve it. It was a case of “I didn’t like it.” Criticism like that isn’t worth paying attention to, because there’s nothing “wrong” they can point out. But “Your manuscript is full of annoying partial sentences; read it out loud and you’ll see what I mean” was a life-changing use of constructive criticism.

Now, on to your actual question.

The first instance (don’t offer unsolicited criticism) sounds like Fe, because you are right, it’s educating total strangers on proper online behavior and how to treat artists in general rather than being, “I don’t want your critiques, stop doing it to me” (and then the Fi artist turns off the comments, since my art only matters to me anyway; but the Fe just wants everyone to have a positive online experience and to hear praise).

But the second – “If you like/support X, unfollow me!” is pure (unhealthy) Fi-dom thinking. Why? I do not like it, therefore it is evil, therefore you are evil to like it, and I insist you f**k off. You are so awful, you aren’t even allowed to see what I create! It’s making a harsh judgment about people (without Ti wondering “why you feel this way or like this; what merit does it hold for you?”) based on one’s subjective feelings about a topic (my own hatred for it - Fi), and trying to “control” who has access to your public material by demanding people who don’t align with your politics/fandom opinions/etc do not engage with your art.

This isn’t how the world works. Again, if you put it out there, anyone can access it, read it, see it, save it, use it, talk about it, or critique it. That’s just the way the real world works. If you don’t want people you disapprove of on a “moral” level looking at it, then you can’t share it publicly.

#question #mbti #submission

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mack3030 · 3 years

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I find it really telling that even after their “apology” (which was really weak and seemed more like barely admitting to their problems and sweeping it all under the rug), Anto still has the evidence up on his tumblr.

He can’t say “I don’t accept your apology because it sounds weak and fake and barely takes any real responsibility...” without sounding like a jerk to certain people. (Even if it’s true.)

There’s a difference between saying:

* Okay I finally admit I might have made a mesh that looks almost identical to yours and it might come across as copyright infringement oops sorry about that...and that it took so long to admit...

* I am deeply sorry to the communities I hurt. Not just those who play the sims, but the creators on secondlife whose work I directly stole and edited and claimed as my own. I was not right to deny the claims against me when I knew they were true. From now on I am going to hold myself to a higher standard and apologize to those who I have hurt.

See the thing that rings false about Sonya’s apology is the claim that they didn’t “steal” the mesh but copied it side by side. This rings hollow because of all of the evidence posted by Anto and others that literally shows how IDENTICAL the “Sonyasims” meshes are to the original meshes. Yes, there are some minor differences, but they are few and the similarities are way too uncanny for it to be copied.

In my profession I deal a lot with kids who “trace” artwork and pass it off as their own. One of the biggest red flags is the artwork being too similar to the original. Why? Because if you’re “eyeballing” the work and drawing (aka copying from a reference image) there will be enough noticeable differences for it to not look exactly like the original. Lines might not be as smooth or straight, proportions might be slightly off, details missed. A traced image, however, looks 95% or more like the original with only a few details missed most of the time.

And sonyasims work, based on the screenshots and video evidence compiled, looks like a traced work I’d get from one of my kiddos.

See, there IS a difference between taking someone’s work directly and tracing and using it as a reference for a new work (particularly if you are in the process of learning how to do an art form). Usually if you are not making serious money (I.E you only sell your eyeballed work to a few friends/family members that want one vs trying to make a “brand” and sell it professionally) you can (normally) get away with eyeballing work and not changing it too much. (While it might not be 100% in line with copyright, this is commonly done at the beginners/student level — ex: a student selling a work they did in class at an art show that was heavily derived from a reference image to a friend/teacher.)

But when you decide you want to be a “professional” artist, you have to be able to take a reference image and remix and change it enough that it is a new work in its own right. Copying a reference alone won’t cut it. You have to make it different enough that people can’t come after you for it thinking you lifted a good portion of it from another work in any form. Lots of professional artists have had issues with this, a recent case being Jake Parker, the founder of Inktober, who was accused of plagiarizing from another artist’s how to draw book.

Sonyasims cannot claim ignorance about where the inspiration for their mesh came from. They can’t claim they were only copying the meshes of Anto and others for practice or as cc for their own game. They blatantly put it on their patreon, and claimed that the edited mesh was their own. They tried to be a “professional” cc maker by taking the work of others, editing it a slight bit, and selling it as their own under their own “brand”.

When called out on it, they denied it until they were blue in the face, even throwing out wild suggestions on how they’d “prove” their innocence. All this did was make people more upset, because in light of all the evidence shared....sonyasims’ denials rang hollow.

So what can we ask ourselves and learn from this?:

1) How are we as a community going to deal with “creators” who are blatantly stealing meshes from other sites and creators? I’m not just talking secondlife, I’m also talking turbosquid, imvu, sketchfab, and other 3D sites and places where people take and/or buy meshes and then resell them as their own sims 4 content. As I’ve detailed in one of my past posts, many of these sites don’t actually allow you to sell their meshes for 3D worlds like the Sims 4. And many sims 4 creators don’t inform the original mesh creators about how their mesh is being resold.

How are we going to deal with this? Because this is a bigger problem than just Sonyasims. Many high profile CC creators are VERY guilty of fully converting entire sets from 3D modeling sites to “sell” as their cc content and the community turns a blind eye to it because we want pretty things for our game and don’t think about where they come from. It’s easier to just assume that person made them....even if they are amazingly able to “crank out” tons of surprisingly high quality content on the daily...(almost as if they didn’t have to mesh much at all...🤭).

2) What actions should be required of those who have violated the community’s trust? At what point will they be “forgiven”?

If Sonyasims wants to rebuild trust in the community they will have to show that they deserve it. They have two options. Either try to find more obscure meshes to steal that people won’t recognize, or actually mesh stuff themselves and show they are sorry for their actions. I hope they choose the second, but at what point does the community have to forgive someone who’s wronged it? I think of Savvysweet, who although a majority of the community loves and still supports even with the incident earlier this year, still gets hateful asks and comments from others. What should a simblr do when they’ve been proven to have wronged the Sims 4 CC community? What steps should they take to show true remorse?

3) What do we, as a community value? Do we value having “pretty stuff” in our games, regardless of how it got there and what creative individual’s rights are stepped on? Do we value having a system of paywalls and exclusives where only those who have more can access the creations of the creative community? Do we desire an open source and sharing community where creatives come together and learn and share resources freely while respecting each other? These are all important questions for us to ask as we continue to move forward from this. While this is not the first time a creator has been called out for stealing meshes, this is one that has gained a lot of attention. And while I agree that they deserve the negative attention and consequences that come with their actions, I also feel that if we as a community are going to publicly hold them accountable for it, we need to examine others who are doing the same thing. Because it’s up to us to decide what we want our creative space to look like, and feel like. So chew on these questions, ponder them. If you have an opinion on them, I’d love to know. They’re just questions to consider, because I sure don’t have an answer.

#sonyasims #paywalls suck #theft #copyright violations #oof #sims 4 cc #sims 4 maxis match #sims 4 alpha

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sarenhale · 3 years

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I'm really sorry if this is a weird question, but I was curious if there are any specific ways you keep up such a consistent quality AND quantity of art? You're one of the most prolific and skilled artists I follow and I often find myself thinking "how do they do it?!" I love to draw, but I feel so slow and like I can only post once or twice a month. Has there been anything that helps you stay focused and regular with you art? Thanks in advance, and thanks for being an amazing, inspirational artist ^-^b

This is not a weird question at all, it's actually very interesting! And thank you so much for the kind words... wow... I'm so flattered and happy you would think of me as such an artist T__T These are some really POWERFUL and inspirational words, thank you!! I feel a bit shocked to hear this, but also really happy to know I can inspire someone with my drawings T_T You are the one inspiring me now, my friend

As for the question, I think probably the thing that allows me the most to have the time and inspiration to draw consistently is the fact that I work from home as a freelance artist, and since that's my job, it has become a daily routine for me to draw on commissions/freelance work, and also cut some time for myself and my personal art. Being allowed to stay at home and focus on art as my job is definitely the biggest factor on my productivity, like for example when I was working retail full time a year ago that definitely wasn't the case, I always felt so tired (mentally and physically) that I couldn't barely produce anything in my (nonexistent) free time, because I was so tired I just used that free time to sleep and recover... LOL

Aside from this being the biggest factor in my answer, I think having a good chunk of daily inspiration really helps me gather new ideas and even the excitement to create more daily! Things like playing new games (playing FFXIV and fe3h sparked my creativity immensely in the past year), scrolling through twitter and tumblr and seeing art by the artists I follow, and thinking 'oh man I love how they did this shading or lineart', that really makes me wanna pick up my pen tablet and start drawing, and maybe try something new.

I think having some side hobbies can also really help me get some detached time from drawing, relax and 'clear' my mind, so when I get back at drawing I feel more rested and inspired by the thing I made in my other hobby. Like for example I play a lot of pen on paper rpgs like D&D, cyberpunk and vampire the masquerade, and I also DM a D&D game for my friend group: focusing on writing/planning the encounters and the story really helps meto focus on something that isn't drawing for a change, and also gather material and fuel for more inspirations for later! (Like drawing what transpired during our roles, the npcs my players met, what they did... etc)

Drawing daily is definitely something that required a lot of getting accustomed to during the years, but I found that it comes quite naturally for me. I get a bit antsy when I don't draw actually. It also feels weirdly rewarding to me, I have a serious deficit of attention on basically everything, but drawing puts me 'in the zone' and actually makes me hyperfocused, so it feels kinda 'good' to me to be in The Zone as often as I can.

I would say definitely don't feel bad if you don't produce enough or feel like you aren't drawing 'as much as you should', different people have different routines and way of creating. Our minds are all different and work in different ways! I'd suggest try to find what works best for you, maybe introducing some more inspiration in your life is what you need, or just trying new things, like trying new methods of painting/coloring/doing art. Try playing new games, reading new books or doing some writing, or something that you like doing as a hobby: I find that connecting my art to other hobbies is what really keeps my inspiration and motivation going.

I would also say that's it's important that you get some rest and chill when you feel like you're hitting a wall. Sometimes the answer to hitting a wall and feeling stuck isn't to headbutt the wall, but just allowing yourself some rest and time for yourself. Social media may make it look like people are always amazing and producing a lot, but to be honest, there are some periods of time when I'm also feeling super burnt over drawing, and just dedicate a week or something to playing games, sleeping, and doing something else. I wouldn't even pick up the pen.

Maybe it's because my mental health (and problems) go hand in hand with my inspiration and productivity, but I also try to approach drawing as something that should make me happy, not stressed or frustrated. If something feels unreachable today, try again tomorrow. Sleep on it. It's amazing the amount of times that the 'sleep on it' technique worked on my drawings, even for professional and commercial work. Be kind to youself and find what works for YOU! Producing something is better than produing nothing. Even if you feel like you're 'only' making a couple of drawing a month, that's amazing that you're making something with your HANDS!! From NOTHING!!

And also, I personally think that posting 2 or 3 times a month is actually pretty productive. We have lives, jobs, responsabilities in our daily lives, and also need some good time to rest, so all things considered, I think you're doing amazing already! !

I hope my answer was a least a bit useful to you! I'm always happy to answer questions like this one, it's super interesting to get to think about my process and talk about it with others. So thank you for the interesting question and also the lovely and powerful words :) It's especially thanks to asks like this one that I'm really happy I am able to interact with people with my art.

#MWAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#answered

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weaselbeaselpants · 4 years

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I have a lot to say and not enough time to say it. It hurts, but ya’ll know what this is about so if you want my full fandom retrospective opinion thing guys, here.

I’ve been following Vivienne’s art and career since I found her on dA in 2009. I’ve basically grown up with her and have a wide range of opinions up and down her collective work. I must stress that I do not know her as a person and no matter how critical I get in my personal time if I somehow met her in real life or converse with her online again (like, back in the day we went back and forth. She was pretty nice to me), I’d be humble and congratulate her for her success.

Critique does not, EVER equate to attacking people.

But

the reason I don’t call myself a VivziePopVivzmind-fan is the exact same as to why I don’t like the proud use of ‘anti’. Let me try and explain -

The vast majority of Viv fans are just that: fans. Viv’s one of their favorite artists and they’re happy for her and obviously defensive when some mouth breather pops into their fan discussion calling her and all of them trash. Quite a lot of the Hazbin fans I know in my circle of friends are all pretty accepting and agree on the problematic notions and implications of her work.

HOWEVER, there’s a vocal minority in the VivziePop fandom that were and still are toxic. Their specific interest in Viv back in the day was toxic...and now that she’s moved on into a successful career I doubt they’ve gone away, considering the things I’ve heard. These people - they’d flood Viv’s comments sections and stuff with messages like they were talking to her when they weren’t and they’d unironically call her a god in a way that feels like gaslighting, ex: “I’ll NEVER be as good as you Viv! My art is just sooooo unpopular oh god you are incredible no one will ever like you as much as meeeee”. It made me uncomfortable. It made me not want to be around her because these people took Viv’s role in their lives so seriously and their demand for her attention...it struck a nerve.

These same fans have been around long enough to see actual shitlords - the likes of Kiwifarms and tapatalk wikis - come in and actually harass Viv. Viv’s been sent revenge porn by sick freaks who think they’re funny and believe she deserves it. No. In my non-name fan bystander opinion, Viv’s got some shit to work on, but no one deserves raperevenge porn. EVER. It was genuinely bad and yes Viv and her base have every reason to NOT TRUST these communities. Unfortunately, when these incidents happened, these particular fans took it upon themselves to gatekeep the fandom and act like Viv’s unofficial guard against any kind of decenting opinion of her, all without her say so.

((to the critics who will be all “but Viv or Faust said THIS to their fans-”, like I said, Viv’s far from perfect but regardless of how much she prolly wanted people to side with her I’m gonna guess that she didn’t want people sending transphobic death threats to DollCreep. Again, and this is coming from a bystander here, I have a feeling Viv knows about some of the toxicity but doesn’t know how/want to address it - which is a conversation all it’s own.))

This particular breed of VivziePop “fan” holds so much toxicity in her fandom(s). They aren’t the only cause, but they’re there. They feel entitled to her attention and her approval. They creep me out. Having spoken to other much-less critical admitted fans of Viv around me, these fans appear to creep everyone else out and put the rest of the fandom on edge. They’re gatekeepers. They’re creeps. Like the bronies and SU fans of yestertodayyears, they know harassment exists and that people have crossed the line - so they think any means is necessary to prevent that is automatically good. I could pile together all the incidents and folks who’ve had bad runs ins with this aftershock of Viv-obsession, but I do have a life of my own and this post is already stupid long so I’ll just list out the biggest examples and provide receipts when asked.

Critical blogs have gotten RAPE and death threats because they don’t like Viv’s art. HonestZoophobiaCriticisms, a blog I interracted with back in the day, def got one. Now Viv’s opinion of crit-blogs is that they’re “bad takes” but I can assure you she doesn’t want that shit being said on her behalf.

I’ve seen young artists get blacklisted from sites and forums cause they so much as post a redesign. Viv and co get told through the grapevine that someone’s making hatespeech and so preemptively block said person (prolly cause they’re in the middle of WORKING and can’t deal right now) only to find out after the fact that no, it was just a kid drawing their version of her characters. There’s serious miscommunication issues within the fandom about who’s ‘good’ or ‘bad’ and once you get the actual staff involved in this game of telephone you’re begging for trouble. The problem acknowledged, however, it’s souly from the “Viv never did anything wrong camp”. No word is said about how ugly the fandom is under the surface it’s all one type of person’s fault and not complicated’. Blah

I’ve only ever had ONE obsessive ‘fan’ who’d stalk me, mock me, and then redraw my art just to get attention from me. That shit fucked with my head. As a follower hundreds of miles away from Viv who’s agreed/disagreed with her through the years - I absolutely believe her when she says she hates ‘creeps’ and that she doesn’t want anyone in her fandom spreading hate on her behalf. It’s the one thing about her I’m POSITIVELY sure of. Whether she believes that said underlying harassment exists and/or is even a problem within her fandoms is anyone’s guess. That’s not what I’m here for. I’m here to write stupid blog entries like this, talk about fandoms and media and how they and the real world affect one another, and rb fan art I like. I’m cautiously optimistic fan with a side of salt.

Mixed opinions and critique within a fandom CAN and SHOULD exist. Hazbin Hotel has been greenlit by a studio! It has a product line of merchandise you buy. Helluva Boss is getting eight more episodes this coming year (yeeee:3yeeee). Two of Viv’s properties are now products. Nothing is immune from critique. And in critique you will find a lot of people who are not ‘nice’. Critique or analysis doesn’t have to be nice. There will be, in Viv’s words’ ‘bad takes’ on her writing. Maybe they will be actual CinemaSins-styled bad takes or maybe Viv is just mad that people don’t love and feel inspired by her characters the way she wants them to - it’s a fact she’s going to have to get used to.

((TBH, I’m pretty sure she’s already realized that criticism of all types need to exist. It’s just that, again, her and the SpindleHorse staff are kind of overwhelmed by all matter of takes and opinions coming their way they kinda can’t deal weeding out the fair ones from the assholes, so she lumps them all together.))

Shitposters, ironic fans, unironic fans, critical fans, just critics of Hazbin and Helluva CAN and WILL exist. They should exist and not feel threatened by the megafandom. There are people out there who are one step further and rightfully bothered by Hazbin/Helluva’s use of incorrect symbols, portrayal of certain topics, and the response by creators. These people have strong opinions and are actually disgusted by Viv. They deserve to exist too and should not be vilified because, like me, they’re commentary doesn’t consist of anything personal towards the people at Spindlehorse or the fans of her works. They can rant, they can be professional, they can be petty and they can be fair. But they will exist. You have to deal with it.

I am an ADD/OCD ridden autistic woman with serious anxiety issues who has no one to talk to half the time and so only HAS my fandom to communicate with. But that’s just it - it’s a fandom. A community. You have to learn to not think souly of yourself and of others in a community. A fandom doesn’t exist just for you or any one person. You have the right to be angry and defend or be offended. And it’s in the spirit of that that I ask, prrraaaaaay even, that I please

NOT BE CALLED AN “ANTI-ANTI” for not liking the moniker?!

I DON’T TO BE AN “ANTI”. Not ironically, not unironically. ‘Anti’ should be for politics and shit like pedophiles, necrophiles, nazis, serial killer stans, Trump, racists, antisemites, terfs, animal abusers, rapists, and antivaxxers. Anti should only come into critical media analysis when these ethical issues follow suit IN TO fandom discussion. ((EX: Anime and MLP proudly waving their cp and non-con into the public eye; Hazbin appropriating cultural symbols which are not satanic; Basically anything that concerns John K or Butch Hartman.))

If your DNI list unironically consists of the entirety of one fandom: CONGLATURATIONS! You have done the exact same thing these particular creepy Viv fans have done: monopolize the conversation. And yes, people I’m referring to, IT’S STILL A PROBLEM EVEN IF YOU’RE FIGHTING RACISM/SEXISM/HOMOTRANSPHOBIA.

There are hundreds of Vivziefans who ARE more critical, accepting of faults, interested in discussion and especially rewrite and redesign stuff who would LOVE to engage with you and give you a follow. There’s hundreds of people who no doubt agree with you!

But the thing I’ve seen these very proud AntiHazbinVivzieHelluvaWhatever blogs do is lash out at fans for continuing to like Viv and consume Viv’s art in a healthy way. What the actual fuck is your problem?

I get it. Say a crazy Hazbin fan gets on your case for even SUGGESTING Viv could be homophobic ((”SHE’SBIANDWORKSWITHGAYPPLblahablahblah”)). They get in your face, make some callouts, try to rile up support against you, leave disgusting harassment throughout your social media? Absolutely ban worthy. After that it’s perfectly understandable why you don’t want to engage with anything HHHBZPVivzierelated because you’re so fucking tired of being labeled an abuser or “just jealous” for having an opinion on a show you don’t like. I’m with you!

But,

A fan agrees that something in the canon is bad or that Viv did something they don’t like?

A fan likes your silly shitpost meme?

A fan asks if they can like Hazbin and follow you at the same time?

A fan does fan art of something you don’t like?

If your response to any of these ^^^ things is to get LOUD and accusatory, Vivsplain them about how they’re an absolutely awful person to ever question YOUR opinion, or just block them without a second thought? You’re a petty, vendictive shit and you also need to learn to let things go. I’m sorry but you do. As I already said, Viv’s work is a brand at this point, not just the work of a singular person. As such, there are gonna be mixed opinions and you can’t judge every single one of these people by what they like. You’re a shitty critic with a shitty attitude and yes that will demean the value of what you’re saying. This is bad because, if you’re trying to point out how Angel Dust’s abuse IS handled terribly; gay rep in Viv’s work is weak and terrible; the show appropriates closed practices; the fandom makes excuses for predatory artists and creepy behavior and individuals who have sketchy pasts - I’M WITH YOU. WE NEED TO BE TALKING ABOUT THIS SHIT. JUST BECAUSE THESE ARE ADULT CARTOONS SET IN HELL MEANS THERE SHOULD BE ANYTHING CLOSE TO 2013 PONY-TUMBLR. <<<---- this shit is as important to me as it is to you and I really don’t like being called an abuser or apologist for saying “hey maybe blowing up at ppl for the shows they like ISN’T the way to go about this”.

But I have, just like the good old days of 2015 Zoophobia of yore, been blocked because I admit to being tired of ‘Anti’ being equated to ‘critical’. Same with hater.

Critical DOES NOT = Anti+Hater. I’m fucking tired of people saying it does and I’m tired of people taking up the term as some weird form of fandom reappropriation. It’s stupid.

Tl;dr: Once upon a time, I was in a budding fandom for something I liked made by an indie artist I watched on dA. I wanted to be a bigger fan than I was already, but was told by toxic people within said fandom that I couldn’t be part of it for reasons they’d made up in their head about my ‘motives’ against Viv. My admiration for Viv or what I liked about Zoophobia didn’t matter because I thought the story was really rushed and people weren’t being truthful with how they really felt about it - ergo, I HAD TO GO.

Flash forward 8 years later- My opinion of Viv’s body of work has changed but I still find myself in love with her style and some of her characters. I want to be on a forum or service that gives a healthy look at the problems there are with this series and fandom...and I’m met repeatedly by petty bs where people are again at each other’s throats. And yes, I do think it’s causing more harm than good especially when you insist there’s a “x person shouldn’t be trusted” mentality when fighting actual fucking racist, xenophobic, predatory bullshit.

#vivziepop #vivziepop critical #vivziepop drama #hazbin hotel #hazbin critical #hazbin hotel critical #critical hazbin hotel #anti anti #antis #anti hazbin hotel #cause I want both sides of this debaucle to see this and I'm tired #K?

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bpro-cardstories · 4 years

Text

Yuduki Teramitsu SR

2019 ー Summer Memories [夏の思い出]

“Whether you’re conscious of it or not, the things you experience with your eyes and hands will certainly become your food. There’s no relation between for work or for private.”

『Event: Enjoy! Your Special Summer Holidays (21th - 29th August 2019)』

Part 1

Staff: ‘ーーThis is the end of the shooting. Thank you for your work!’

Yuduki: ‘Thank you very much.’

Tsubasa: ‘Yuduki-kun, good work. You were great!’

Yuduki: ‘Thanks. I was a bit nervous because I was alone, but….. I’m happy to hear that.’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufu, I am looking forward to the magazine’s release.’

Tsubasa: ‘Ehm…. The car will come around now, but is it alright to send you back to the mansion as it is?’

Yuduki: ‘Ah…. If so, then can I ask you to drop me off at the art museum? It’s near here…..’

Tsubasa: ‘Of course! Is it an exhibition you are interested in?’

Yuduki: ‘Yes. They’re doing an exhibition with the theme of the summer night sky right now…. If I have time, I’ll go, I thought.’

Tsubasa: ‘Summer night sky….. I am sure it’s a wonderful exhibition.’

Yuduki: ‘If you’d like to, do you want to go together, Tsubasa-san?’

Tsubasa: ‘Eh, are you sure?’

Yuduki: ‘Yes, of course.’ _______________________

ーIn the art museum.ー

Yuduki: ‘Waah……’

Tsubasa: ‘A sky full of stars all over the wall…… It’s so beautiful……’

Yuduki: ‘Yeah……. It’s the biggest work in this exhibition. Amazing….. If you look closely, each star is carefully drawn.’

Yuduki: ‘...... The artist here, his colours are so rich. He uses a lot of blue, and even though it’s night, it feels bright.’

Tsubasa: ‘Lovely…… It gives you the feeling that you could stare at it forever……’

Yuduki: ‘Yeah……’

Tsubasa: ‘Besides…… The atmosphere of this art museum matches with the works. But, I wonder why there are so few visitors here?’

Yuduki (pensive): ‘It’s a weekday, and probably because there are many minor artists.’

Tsubasa: ‘Oh….. If you think about it, it’s such a waste. Even though so many beautiful works are assembled here.’

Yuduki: ‘I agree. However…… This silence matches the night sky. I may have ended up thinking I’m a bit happy, that there aren’t many people.’

Yuduki: ‘..............’

(....... Yuduki-kun, his eyes are sparkling. Usually, I barely see him talk about his hobbies. I wonder if he stretches out his antenna like this, to hone his sensitivity.)

Tsubasa: ‘Uhm…… Thank you very much for showing me this wonderful exhibition.’

Tsubasa: ‘I admire that even though you’re busy every day, you properly collect information and study in-depth like this.’

Yuduki (smiles): ‘No…… It’s not such a big thing, something like studying in-depth. I simply like it and it catches my eye.’

Yuduki: ‘Oh, right, the permanent exhibitions of this art museum are also really gooーー’

Tsubasa: ‘Oh…… Yuduki-kun, in front of us....!’

Yuduki: ‘Eh?’

Yuduki (surprised): ‘Waah…..!?’

???: ‘What….’

Yuduki: ‘I-I’m sorry…....!’

Goshi: ‘Hah? ….. Yuduki?’

Yuduki: ‘Eh…… Kaneshiro-san?’

Part 2

Goshi: ‘What the, so Sumisora’s also here?’

Tsubasa: ‘Hello. Meeting at such a place…... It surprised me.’

Yuduki: ‘Did Kaneshiro-san come here to see the exhibition, too?’

Goshi (smiles): ‘Yeah. Besides, it’s not that I had an eye on this exhibition. I was going to different places and that art museum was around this area.’

Tsubasa: ‘Now that I remember, Kaneshiro-san is free until evening today.’

Goshi: ‘Yeah. So I decided to go take a look around before evening today. I also might get some suggestions for songwriting.’

Yuduki: ‘Song suggestions…....?’

Goshi: ‘I never thought I’d meet you guys here, but are you free?’

Tsubasa: ‘Yes, Yuduki-kun brought me with him. He said there is an interesting exhibition.’

Goshi: ‘Hee? Not a bad hobby.’

Yuduki: ‘But……. I’m just drawing in private.’

Tsubasa: ‘Yuduki-kun?’

Yuduki: ‘Just like Kaneshiro-san I need to think I make the best use of it…. Because I’m a professional I need to always be aware of this aspect actually.’

Goshi: ‘What? This and that has nothing to do with each other.’

Yuduki (surprised): ‘Eh....’

Goshi: ‘Whether you’re conscious of it or not, the things you experience with your eyes and hands will certainly become your food. There’s no relation between for work or for private.’

Yuduki: ‘So it’s like that......?’

Goshi: ‘Besides, you never know when or what will lead to work.’

Goshi (smiles): ‘Yuduki is perceptive and also has a sense for paintings. Someday there might even be an opportunity to do a CD jacket or artwork. Polish your senses and you won’t lose.’

Yuduki: ‘..........’

Tsubasa: ‘I agree. Be it your hobby or something else, without a doubt all the things you experience should widen Yuduki-kun’s possibilities.’

Yuduki: ‘Is that so…….’

Goshi (smiles): ‘What, aren’t you believing in what we say?’

Yuduki: ‘N-No! That’s not what I meant……’

Yuduki (smiles): ‘Uhm…… Thank you very much.’

Goshi: ‘No problem.’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufu. Even so, as expected of Kaneshiro-san. You’re also observing the other group members well, no.’

Goshi: ‘What? That’s not really the case…….’

Yuduki (smiles): ‘That’s amazing.’

Goshi (blushes): ‘....... I said it’s not the case…….’

Children: ‘Waah! How beautiful~~!!’

Yuduki: ‘Eh? ……. There are a lot of children?’

Children: ‘Look! There’s a really big painting!!’

Goshi: ‘Is that some kind of school event? It’s crowded all at once…… I’m leaving.’

Tsubasa: ‘Yuduki-kun, what should we do? Even though we did pass by the works.’

Yuduki: ‘Then we….. Should also leave….. Uhm……’

Goshi: ‘....... What. Something wrong?’

Yuduki: ‘No, uhm….. Do you two still have some time? There’s a place where I want to go.’

Part 3

Goshi: ‘By that place, you meant here?’

Yuduki (smiles): ‘Yes. It’s a tapioca milk tea shop.’

Goshi: ‘Not bad….. So there was such a place, huh.’

Tsubasa: ‘Yuduki-kun, do you like it?’

Yuduki: ‘I don’t know…… if I like it or not.’

Tsubasa: ‘Eh?’

Yuduki: ‘The other day, Korekuni-san taught me a tapioca drink in Japanese style. Now that I mention it, I’m realizing that I never had a drink that you usually drink.’

Goshi (smiles): ‘And that makes you curious, huh.’

Yuduki (smiles): ‘Yes. That becomes my food….. as well maybe. Won't you drink it together with me?’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufu, if you say so, I would really love to. Are you fine with it as well, Kaneshiro-san?’

Goshi: ‘...... It can’t be helped. If we got this far, then I’ll just come with you.’

Yuduki: ‘Ehehe, thank you a lot.’

Goshi: ‘I don’t like things that are too sweet, so I’ll let you choose one that looks good.’

Yuduki: ‘Yes, leave the one to me that manages the right degree of sweetness. By the way, this shop here ranked first on the internet. It seems that the tapiocas are really big.’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufu, you researched quite well.’

Yuduki: ‘Yes. I thought if it’s the first time it should be delicious after all……’

Yuduki: ‘Then, I’ll go buy the drinks.’

Goshi: ‘Okay….. Is this enough?’

Yuduki: ‘Ah…… It’s fine. Because you two are accompanying me, I’ll treat you.’

Tsubasa: ‘Don’t be, I will definitely pay.’

Goshi: ‘Idiot. As if I’d let my junior or Tsubasa pay for me. I’ll pay.’

Yuduki: ‘No, I will.’

Goshi: ‘It’s fine I said. Hereーー’

Yuduki: ‘Y-You can’t…….!’

Goshi: ‘Haah?’

Yuduki: ‘If you say you will at any cost, then I’ll change Kaneshiro-san’s drink to a very sweet one…….!’

Goshi (shocked): ‘Okay…….’

Goshi (smirks): What, are you planning to threaten me into it?’

Yuduki: ‘I’m serious…….!’

Goshi: ‘Haa……. You're far more stubborn than I thought.’

Yuduki: ‘That’s right. I’m stubborn.’

Goshi (smiles): ‘....... Geez, understood. Just for today, I’ll let myself be treated quietly.’

Yuduki: ‘........! Yes……..!’ ___________

Yuduki: ‘ーーThank you for waiting, here.’

Goshi: ‘Ah, thanks’

Tsubasa: ‘Thank you.’

Yuduki: ‘Then……. Let’s try.’

Goshi: ‘....... Cough…… It came all at once……’

Yuduki (smiles): ‘Hm…… The tapiocas are so springy……’

Tsubasa: ‘The drops really are big. They have a chewy texture, but above all, the taste of the tea is solid……’

Goshi: ‘Yeah. It’s more delicious than I thought.’

Yuduki: ‘Yes…….!’

Goshi: ‘........ Fuuh.’

Yuduki: ‘Ehehe.’ ____________

Goshi: ‘Aah……. Even so, it sure is hot.’

Tsubasa: ‘Yes, this climate is likely to continue. It’s right to speak of Summer…....’

Yuduki: ‘At such a time, something cold is just right.’

Tsubasa: ‘Fufu, you’re right.’

Yuduki: ‘Next time it’s shaved ice…… How about Kaneshiro-san and Tsubasa-san?’

Tsubasa: ‘Shaved ice sounds good!’

Goshi: ‘Aah…… Well, since it’s Summer, that ain’t bad.’

Yuduki: ‘.......! I’ll search for a delicious place.’

Goshi: ‘Yeah, I’ll count on you.’

Goshi: ‘It’s something that cools your body down.’

Yuduki: ‘Yes……..!’

Yuduki: ‘...... Ehehe.’

END

#b project #b-project #yuduki teramitsu #killer king #myps #card:2019

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heavenly96 · 4 years

Note

Hi! Sorry to bother you but I really love your artstyle and I was wondering if you had any advice on improving character anatomy/expressions or perspective? 😊

It depends on how you want to learn. Some people like to use tricks to draw stuff. Unfortunately that never really worked for me so I’m in the “practice makes perfect” camp. For me, it’s studies and references. I’ll save everyone their sanity as this is just a big block of text..

For anatomy? Nudes. Haha, but seriously. I keep meaning to do another one because I had done an anatomy study using a nude model a while back. You can buy them, go to a workshop, or often times you can find them on art sites like Deviant art sometimes (which is what I had done, I think). If you’re not comfortable with nudes then use pose references with people that have a bit of clothing on. It’s up to you. I found this to be invaluable. I have no interest in achieving a photo-realistic style but, and I don’t remember who said this but for some, you have to learn anatomy before you can break it (i.e. furnish a more cartoonistic look). Pose studies like this help you understand limits of bone and muscle movement, how they’re positioned/contracted or relaxed in a certain pose. Then, depending on how you want your character to look, exaggerate it.

I have no serious tips for expressions as I just learned them over time. Ever since I could hold a pencil, I loved drawing facial expressions. I like to people watch, I love the expressions I’d see in old cartoons I’d watch and I generally follow artists with expressive styles that I like. As of late, I’ve sort of been doing what I just suggested for anatomy for specific parts of the face. Study it. If studies are a bit too time consuming, use references. Eventually, you may not need them. I used to need a reference every time I drew a hand. Just snap a photo of your own hand and use that. As of now? I rarely need one because I’ve gotten used to the feeling of drawing a hand by way of reference. Some times I still use them for a general idea but I’m not dependent on it anymore. I swear by references and use them all the time. Clip studio has some okay models to use when I need them for poses. I will say this for expressions though since these are things I’ve noticed/learned:

Your facial muscles work together. In pairs, in groups, etc. If something is moving on one side, there’s likely something going on on the other side.

Some changes are negligible like with eyes and ears (maybe. I am one of those that can move their ears individually). You can move those independently fairly well.

Others not so much, like eyebrows. I’ve been trying to employ this concept but you should be able to draw eyebrows in one fail swoop with many expressions (like a unibrow and then erase the middle). At the very least, the middle should be an anchor point (place your finger there. You’ll notice you can’t move those ends of your eyebrows independently). They always move together. Your mouth is another one.

No one’s face is perfectly symmetrical. It likely depends on your style but I try to avoid symmetry rulers when drawing faces.

There may be things that won’t come that easily though. I can’t give any tips on perspective. I really can’t. It’s something I’ve never been able to get used to drawing and I have to use a reference every. Single. Time.

These are just my opinions though. I’m not a professional artist. I mostly just do this as a hobby but these are the things that helped me. But in the end, do things to make your life easier. Use references, community assets, less difficult angles, etc. I even recommend tracing! (for learning purposes though, don’t go posting that).

#art #anatomy #expressions #perspective #asks #kreepshowstudios #long post

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faelune-home · 3 years

Text

FFXIV Write #8: Adroit

(a/n: I read the descriptor for this one and instantly thought of Alphi and his talent for art. As I was writing it shifted a bit into some Studium memories.

Mostly spoiler free, but I’d safely put it in the post-4.1 downtime, since I talk about Ala Mhigo being free for a moment.

I made a mad rush to submit this cos I got close to the deadline, so having to quickly re-edit this post to add these author’s notes, I can’t think of much else to say :’)

Word count: 781)

Fhara was impressed by Alphinaud’s artistic skills since she first saw his sketches in pursuit of Thancred, and then later Yugiri and Gosetsu. Given that prior to their exile to Ishgard, most of their interactions had been on the more professional side, despite Fhara’s attempts to lighten him up, so any hobbies hadn’t quite come up from the boy.

Although it seemed now that even with the Scions’ increased capacity in helping with Ala Mhigo’s transition into the alliance, he’d found some time between work to sketch some more, and she was certainly curious about his work. And now, while checking in on the otherwise empty Rising Stones to report on Cid’s investigations into the missing Omega, she found a visible pencil piece left out in the open on the desk, and her eyes were wont to observe.

“My apologies for leaving you, discussion with the messenger from Ala Mhigo took a touch longer than I expected.” Fhara jumped at Alphinaud’s return, rather noticeably leaning back away from the table.

“Did I interrupt your thoughts?” he asked, although he’d clearly already noticed where her attention had been. Fhara didn’t even try to hide the sheepish flick of her tail as he made to tidy up the papers he’d been working with, shuffling the sketch underneath a report from Gridania.

“I might’ve been looking, sorry. But it’s very nicely done, I was rather taken with it. Are you going to finish it?” Despite her perked ears and encouraging grin, he shook his head.

“Later. I have rather a lot of work to be doing, I shouldn’t be wasting time now with idle doodling.”

“I’m sure it would be fine, there isn’t a hard deadline on when everything needs to be done, right?” He didn’t look convinced, still trying to tuck the sketch under another file. Fhara’s ear flicked, curiosity nibbling away at her.

“If you don’t mind, what made you want to practise art as a hobby?” she asked. Fhara decided it would be best to not mention that Krile had already told her why, spare him any embarrassment. Besides, even at that, there had to be more to it.

“It was mainly idle busyness between school work. Believe it or not, even I need a respite from the books every so often,” he replied, taking a seat. “I wouldn’t dream of sharing those early drawings, however, they’re hardly that impressive.”

“Why not? If it's about skill, wouldn’t it be nicer to look back and see the improvement?” Fhara took the seat next to him.

“Perhaps, but that’s not the only reason.” Then with a glance toward her, he rather bluntly said, “Krile no doubt already told you, didn’t she.” The woman didn’t answer, but her glance away said it for her. A moment passed between them.

“Truthfully,” Alphinaud started, finally bringing the sketch back out in view, “she’s not wrong that it was a motivator to improve. You see, being much younger than your peers makes one stand out for all the wrong reasons, and very rarely would they treat you as an equal. The first year or so at the Studium wasn’t easy on a social level. Eventually my sister and I found some common ground with classmates, but it was still not quite the same.”

With a wry smile, he recalled, “I remember most ladies weren’t much interested in any friendships or affections, and what few did seem to mostly be humouring me.”

“But surely some of them did work out? Given some of Alisaie’s...complaints?” As much as Fhara sympathised with the girl’s woes, at the moment, she was more focused on Alphinaud and his own experiences. The chat did make her note to ask Alisiae for her own school tales eventually.

“Yes, I won’t deny there were a few,” he coughed, a light flush growing on his cheek at some memory or another, “Mostly in the final few years, never anything serious and never lasting long, unfortunately. The artwork did seem to help though, since at least those few fleeting romances were drawn in by my work.”

“Well that’s good,” Fhara smiled, “I’m glad some of it worked out. Even if it was just a small thing.”

“I...suppose so, even with Alisaie and Krile’s teasing,” he nodded, finally looking a lot less tense than he had been at the start of the conversation shift. “Nowadays, most drawings are done more for relaxation or amusement. Some have suggested making a profit out of it, but I’ve never felt so inclined.”

“Well,” Fhara hummed, her tail flicking curiously, “would you still take a request?” Alphinaud blinked, confused yet with a welcome spark in his eye.

“Anything in particular?”

#ffxivwrite #ffxivwrite2021 #alphinaud leveilleur #my writing #my wol #keeper of the moon miqo'te #fhara laali #ffxiv #Final Fantasy XIV

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nutty1005 · 4 years

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Xiao Zhan: It’s Your Turn

Translator’s Note: This article comes from VogueMe Magazine 2020 Feb Issue.

Currently, the trend in the entertainment business is to get famous overnight, the statistics dictate everything – a drama, a variety show, a song… all of which could give birth to a super idol, fame, commercial value and opportunities that come along with it. In 2019, the drama “The Untamed”, adapted from an internet novel, became this window of opportunity. This is the story of a young man who received the opportunity. And like other idols created by their era, his fanbase grew immensely, radiating throughout the youth, his name etched in time. All of these simply points to this – it’s now Xiao Zhan’s turn.

The summer of 2015, Xiao Zhan had not yet realized that he was going to job switch from the design firm opened by his teacher. The teacher did not feel so as well – as Xiao Zhan left for the talent search variety show, he told him, “Go play, come back to work once you’ve been eliminated.”

The show was called “X-FIRE”, and positions itself as a large scaled youth talent development inspirational show. During broadcast, the description says “16 secretly trained youths painstakingly selected from a few thousand 16-24 year olds”. At that time, Xiao Zhan was 23 years old – nearing the upper age limit.

Xiao Zhan just wanted to “play around a bit”. He felt that he would be just touring for a round, and he would be back after a week. As the former class Cultural Committee Member in his university, Xiao Zhan loved singing, won quite a few inter-school cultural activities awards, but never trained in dance-singing. Xiao Zhan, who graduated in graphic design, learnt drawing since young, but never thought of becoming an artist, because “it is hard to survive as an artist, you still need to earn a living”. He was willing to lead a simple life and go to work everyday, with a direct and clear life plan – as a graphic designer, do his work well, then open his own firm.

The summer 4 years later, the name “Xiao Zhan” meant a lot of different things – a member of a pop group, the lead actor of one of the most popular drama, the owner of a Weibo account with more than 22million followers, or as what Chinese entertainment business puts it – a “top traffic”. The topics and imagery surrounding him includes – Xiao Zhan’s looks, Xiao Zhan’s design talent, Xiao Zhan’s professionalism, Xiao Zhan’s role as Wei Wuxian…

And like the other idols who broke out in this era, he has his own set of records – moderators of Bilibili (a video hosting site in China) nagged that his drama fans uploaded so much of his videos that they “almost see him 800 times a day”, Xiao Zhan was jokingly proclaimed as “The Man who caused the Bloodbath of Bilibili”; he became the cover person of a magazine, and the two mobile sales platform app broke down consecutively on the day of the sales; his popularity in 2020 only got higher – on 9 Jan, according to Tian Mao statistics (TN: Taobao eShopping Mall), the Portrait magazine, where he was the cover person, sold out 100,000 copies in 3 seconds, overall sales exceeding 13million Chinese yuan, a poster was spread all around the internet with the accompanying text “a fandom that brought paper media back from its grave” – this is the Xiao Zhan statistics.

But different from the breakout idols, Xiao Zhan did not encounter major controversies (TN: This was published early Feb), and his career did not seem to go through much fluctuations. He never thought that he would be at this point – “Sometimes you’re not ready, but life has already pushed you to ahead. What you can do is to quickly keep up with the pace.” He is now at the stage where any of his actions are “studied under a magnifying glass”, but he feels that his stress levels are not as high as his previous few years, “the past few years, I had the drive but nowhere to use that, now I know how to work hard.”

During the initial auditions, Xiao Zhan still continued to work as per normal, go onstage – sing – leave, which was quite fun. After the selection down to 32 persons, he did not think much of it, and left his work to go to Beijing to practice the dance for the variety show. After the selection down to 16 persons, he practiced everything – dancing, vocals and flexibility training.

He did not think much of what would happen later. The winter in Beijing was especially cold, after the show recording, it would be around 3am or 4am, and there would be fans waiting for him outside of the studio – Xiao Zhan felt quite sorry for them, “All are young girls, it’s so cold and so dark.” He felt surreal having fans. When the 16 of them went to Zhejiang TV “Running 2016” New Year Eve performance, he saw the stage and felt that it was especially big and he was especially happy, and kept making sure he remembered the moves so as not to make any mistakes. After the final battle, Xiao Zhan’s team lost, but he and a few of his teammates were rescued by fan votes.

In 2016, Xiao Zhan debuted as part of X-Nine. During the signing of the contract, Xiao Zhan finally realized that he was going to make a career switch. “When you look at it now, 23 year old is also still a child, but no one took me as a child then.” – Xiao Zhan was the oldest in the group, he made his own decision to sign the contract, he thought that if it did not work out, he could go back to work, there was no need for him to paint himself into a corner.

3½ years after his debut, Artist Xiao Zhan still had to explain to interviewers his obsession with going to work. That day, he had a pimple on the left side of his face, and the makeup artist was applying essences on his face. The makeup room was simply a curtained area in the basement of the Art Gallery, full of passing staff, the editor was discussing the shooting schedule with his manager, the stylist was here delivering clothes, and he sat there with his eyes closed, allowing others to apply whatever it is on his face.

Xiao Zhan’s eyes are long, and also wide, he is very fair and his side profile is graceful and beautiful. With his looks, one would imagine that his personality would be cooler, more introvert, with mild melancholy, like those prince-like male leads in romantic dramas. But his personality does not really match his looks – he is serious, disciplined, he does not talk much initially, but overall he is a relaxed person, and quite funny occasionally.

“A lot of art students do not want to go to work,” the interviewer said. Xiao Zhan learnt drawing since young, some of his happiest moments in his childhood would be to win drawing awards or to have his works praised by his teachers, other unimportant happy moments includes had a good lunch, went to an amusement park, or had a liking for a girl in high school.

“They never went through the society school of hard knocks,” Xiao Zhan said. He described himself as someone who went through “quite a fair bit of knocking”. Since young, his father thought him to be independent, taught him budgeting, and told him stories about Bill Gates’s children… “I wanted to say, god, you’re not Bill Gates.” Despite all these, Xiao Zhan stopped using his parents’ money ever since his university graduation.

Xiao Zhan not only learnt drawing, he also learnt violin, go and Chinese calligraphy… pushed him to study in “National Key” middle school, “National Key” high school (TN: National Key refers to the top range of schools in China). He was an obedient child, but as a standard art student, Xiao Zhan was better in humanity subjects, and his math was not good, hence all the while he had always been the mid-bottom of the pack, which worried his family of 3 quite a fair bit.

Studying graphic design in university, Xiao Zhan felt that his university life was quite comfortable – everyday before class he would adjust himself a bit, although in the end it seemed like it did not work well after all, but at least his results were decent. Xiao Zhan emphasized that he was “definitely not the school hottie”. He was a good student. After he had learnt what the teachers taught, he started a studio on the side. The design studio would take on poster and logo design work; the photography studio only have 3 persons, Xiao Zhan did the photo taking, the other 2 did lighting. Before graduation he went to intern in a design firm, hence it was easy for him to find a job. Within a year of working, his monthly salary was around 4,000 to 5,000 Chinese Yuan, which would quite alright for Chongqing at that point in time.

Being part of a boy group releasing albums, shooting web dramas. The way to do things right was quite different from his previous job – his characterization in the group is a warm guy, although Xiao Zhan did not like characterization, he seriously fulfilled his role, and he was obedient. When someone in the variety show suggested that he lose some weight, he replied “I’m quite thin already I still have to lose weight”. As a commoner, Xiao Zhan was 183cm and 150lbs, his mother would always say he was too thin, and he felt so himself as well. That person showed him the film, “the camera lens is a really scary thing, I literally looked like a ball”. It was not easy for Xiao Zhan to lose weight, so he did it brutally. He was so hungry that he dreamed that he was eating. Xiao Zhan is now 127lbs, but this was not his thinnest.

“How was it like after debut?” “Unoccupied.” (TN: Xiao Zhan used the Chinese phrase “picking at his feet” to describe the state of emptiness.) Xiao Zhan’s words were paced and gentle, most were caught unawares by the sudden switch to casual humor, he might not be laughing, after others laughed he would continue his conversation seriously.

After his debut, he felt that he was freer than the times when he was still an intern. But he did not allow himself to stay free, he took vocal and dancing lessons, making sure that he could do sing-dancing to the best of his abilities. But he was still a bit lost – when he was still a designer, his future was clear and straight, but after his debut he had no clue where his future led to.

“I could count the number of dramas I’ve acted in with my fingers,” Xiao Zhan said. After which, he started counting them – “Battle through the Heavens”, “The Wolf”, “Oh! My Emperor”, “The Untamed”, “Joy of Life”, “Jade Dynasty”, “The Oath of Love”… the earliest work “Super Star Academy” was not counted – It was shot with his boy group, he was still fat, and he had no clue what he was doing.

Acting was his own idea. When he started auditioning he had not even attended any performance classes, he saw the director, took a piece of paper that indicated the scene and lines, and just went for it. Xiao Zhan did not feel that it was awkward, it was something he wanted to do, so he would do so without any inhibitions, and grasp every opportunity to do so. Singing was something that he always liked, his first single after debut was a song voted by his fans. With the stage and his fans, with attention, he would always want to do it better. Acting was something totally foreign to him.

The first turning point was “The Wolf”. When auditioning, within 2 hours, Xiao Zhan had tried many roles – the bounty hunter who was threatening someone, the prince whose brother was about to be executed… Xiao Zhan won the role of the bounty hunter – the 4th character on the character roll, Ji Chong. During the pre-shoot training he was still acting in “Battle through the Heavens”, daytime he would be shooting, nighttime he would be having performance classes. He did not feel it was tough then, as long as he had time to sleep. “Work is something I am willing to do, I will only feel very motivated, tomorrow must be done better than today.” Xiao Zhan liked Wei Wuxian, felt that he was vivid. When acting, during the first month he would be second guessing himself everyday, is the portrayal accurate? Would the audience accept it? Xiao Zhan checked with the director everyday. After a month, he stopped asking, he felt that he was Wei Wuxian. Dramas adapted from web novels are rarely positively received, his hopes for Wei Wuxian was that “I hope people would not dislike the character because of my acting”.

The summer of 2019, the drama aired, and the real turning point arrived.

Billions of fans, frequent trending topics on Weibo, appearing on multiple magazine covers and even causing the sales platform app to crash…

He is one of the few artists in Weibo that sets his account as “only posts in the past 6 months are viewable”, but it did not affect his popularity. His interaction with his fans are witty, the statistics are more than enough to attract attention. Last year on the Chinese Valentine’s Day (TN: 7th of the 7th Lunar month), he posted a photo informing his fans that he had put on weight, his pants folded up, legs in the swimming pool. One of his fans replied, “Fine, good to know that your leg hairs are doing fine.” This reply was boosted to the top with 190,000 likes.

“After watching ‘The Untamed’ and ‘Joy of Life’ and then meeting you, I feel like you are very similar to your performance method, calm. You are like an AI, whatever you do you’re especially precise.” “You’re highly professional.” The interviewer concluded.

At the start of the conversation, Xiao Zhan just finished an exterior photo shoot, we were both seated, leaning forward and warming hands above the radiator. He said, “Artist is just a job, I don’t like artists to place themselves on a pedestal, just like today you are the reporter who is interviewing me, today I am someone being interviewed. Cooperation, is just so that we can complete our jobs, coming in for the photo shoot is my job today, every single staff is also executing this job, it’s just the role is different.” Because he went through the society “school of hard knocks”, he respected and understood the truth behind teamwork.

As someone who once had to face clients, he knew how it felt as someone at the receiving end of endless unreasonable requests, and therefore he did not want to be someone like that. His standards for work is consistent – high efficiency, good results, everyone is happy, no one has to serve another person. Also “once I am done I will knock off, after I knock off no one should come find me, let me be alone.”

“Everyone works to fulfill their needs, they have entertainment after they knock off, they have freedom and privacy. As a public figure, artist, the product is yourself, the works are also yourself. You have to output materials, contribute works, and then gain the opportunity to grow, for higher social status, value and better lifestyle. For some people, besides their career, they also included their dreams,” the interviewer said.

“The understanding is very thorough. You win some, you lose some, after becoming a public figure it meant that there are multiple pairs of eyes staring at you, anything you do would be judged. Whether it is positive or misguided. Truth and falsehoods, isn’t this circle just like this? Whether the rumors or the gossip is true or false, who knows?” Xiao Zhan said.

On 5 Jan 2020, Xiao Zhan was working in a sculpture garden in Shanghai Songjiang, shooting a series of photographs to be the cover of VogueMe. It was cold, the gallery’s doors were open, and the wind blew from the first floor to the basement. Everyone was wearing winter jackets.

In the morning, beside the metal sculpture on the first floor, Xiao Zhan and model Chen Yu faced the camera separately. As the shutters rolled, they did not exchange glances or touch each other. As the photographer requested the model to sit on the ground, Xiao Zhan said his only sentence to her, “Careful your head.” and used his hands to shield her head from the protruding portion of the sculpture.

That day’s Weibo opening advertisement was also Xiao Zhan. As per the photographer’s request, he tilted his head up slightly and gave a cold gaze, or side glancing a faraway place, but also at the same time, he was smiling sweetly on mobile phone screens, promoting a series of instant food products.

In the afternoon, the team went to the exterior, to a concrete sculpture beside the gallery entrance, where he and the model stood in front of, facing the camera. The arm was on the model’s shoulders, and the two of them looked at the camera – he was even thinner than the model. In yet another set, the staff erected a ladder to one of the rooftop grass patches on the gallery buildings. An ice cold rock slab was selected, which the assistant padded using a jacket, and tested the light levels. After which, it was Xiao Zhan’s turn. He was wearing a red jacket with blue shirt, wearing a baseball cap, lying on his side on the rock slab, supporting his head with his arm. In between shoots, the assisted would hand him a long wool top, with deep blue diamond checks, quite thin. The top was flipped over, he slipped his hands into the sleeves to protect the front of his body, his assistant handed over another water bottle that contained warm mineral water to warm his hands. Xiao Zhan basically did not speak, he placed the bottle on his neck to gain some warmth.

An artist’s job, the profession included losing weight, staying hungry, freezing and staying up overnight, wearing winter clothes in summer is the norm, not drinking water prior to any shoots to prevent water bloating on screen… people who do those well may become famous, if they look good or are lucky they may become even more famous. Now Xiao Zhan has an opportunity, and like his previous job, he chose to be down-to-earth and do it well.

In the evening, the green screens were setup in basement 2 of the gallery. 17:44, Xiao Zhan was in position, his manager reminded the stylist to take note of the clothes’ proportion – “The sweater is too long.” Hence, the sweater was folded up. After the camera assistant brought down the Apple machines, the cameraman adjusted his machines, and started shooting the video. Quite a few scenes were done in one take, in the middle there was a break, the manager and the camera crew were discussing camera positions. This was the 10th hour of the shoot, Xiao Zhan sat behind the table, laid his head on a prop gift box and waited quietly – we could not see if he was tired or not.

The shoot ended, and the sky was already dark. Xiao Zhan has not yet knocked off. The media had ended their work, the manager was darting around, arranging for Xiao Zhan to change out and get on his car, to rush to his rehearsal that night – they were already behind schedule. Both teams bid their farewell, Xiao Zhan warm and gentle, still unclear whether he was tired. After less than an hour’s journey, he would need to go onstage to sing, and thereafter, his work would be to complete the costume testing of 20 different sets of clothes.

The Initial Cold

The time set for the shoot was 9am, Xiao Zhan arrived at the rural set at 8.30am. His overnight flight arrived only the day before, meeting Xiao Zhan on the cold morning of a deep southern winter, his spirits looked great, his face having the same kindness as usual. The endless job schedules taught him how to conserve his energy – no casual conversation, not even to his staff; take every opportunity to eat or rest; absolutely no procrastination, ensure efficiency, do his best to accommodate and complete every job. He is a highly disciplined and professional artist.

In this shoot, the warm, gentle smiles have been replaced by cold, sharp glares, the metal and concrete sculptures gave him a few minutes of inner emotions and narrative, his scenes with the model was almost like he was acting in the set of “Last Year at Marienbad”. Xiao Zhan displayed emotions and charm very different from usual self – this is the power of an actor. The darker filters and monochrome imagery restored the caution that the youth of his age would have, it was the concealed feelings of a sunny boy. With such an idol, not only he can warm your hearts, there are still much to expect from him.

#xiao zhan #sean xiao #xiaozhan #肖战

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funnuraba · 3 years

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A Rough Moral Overview of Archie Comics: Teen Propaganda Machine

Part 5: Al Hartley Rears His Ugly Head

And then... there's the grim shadow of Al Hartley and his Christian Archie comics.

In any discussion of the politics of Archie Comics, Al Hartley stands in a class of his own. If you know much about Archie Comics, and even if you don't, you may have seen some of his work, because by modern standards--oh boy, do those Spire Christian Comics make an impact. They're officially licensed, all of them, and some are reworked from stories he wrote under the official Archie banner, often stories that were already groaning from the strain of not mentioning Jesus.

The "Christmas spirit" was sometimes used as a stand-in. In the Spire Archie comics, the characters are allowed to preach openly.

Usually Betty. Dear God, Al Hartley's Betty. But one interesting thing is that Ethel and Dilton, of all people, are usually the runners-up in Jesus loving. Apparently the Evangelical split with science hadn't taken effect yet, because Hartley-Dilton is an ally to religion, and his cleverness only brings him closer to God. Hartley's Ethel is, bizarrely, an incredibly sympathetic take on the character, perhaps one of the kindest ever looks at a girl so desperate for acknowledgment, validation, anything, that she's willing to put up with Jughead.

Except for the comic where she talks about how her parents neglect her, and Archie and Betty explain to her that God wants her to honor and respect the parents He chose to give her, no matter what they do. That's kind of a slap in the face.

Ethel is either the innocent in pain, ripe for conversion, or a zealous convert. Archie often takes her place as the clueless wandering fool. Reggie, Jughead and Veronica are sometimes converted at the end. Sometimes Veronica is the worldly, promiscuous no we can't go quite that far, but that's the suggestion. Reggie and Jughead also slot very well into an exhibition of humanity's sins, with Reggie of course being vanity and Jughead gluttony. Usually Jughead's gluttony is a forgivable sin, but one in need of fixing nonetheless.

KRAK! This mansion, owned and operated by one "Professor Beelzebub", represents, of course, Sin in all its forms, and Jughead is swallowed up early on by a room full of food. Betty approaches Archie, from outside the house, and manages to free him with the power of prayer.

Notice the sinful masses crawling from the wreckage almost as an afterthought. Can you guess who Hartley's favorite character is?

Yes. Al Hartley was just a little partial to Betty. Hartley was supposedly born again after tiring of the cheesecake work he produced for the first part of his professional life, but he managed to be astonishingly horny for Betty despite that. And his writing is responsible for Insufferable Christian Betty, AKA the worst Betty.

Hartley's comics are.... not subtle. They're Archie at the height of camp and the height of hilarity...

....and they're hateful, reactionary trash covered in a sugary Archie coating. A Sugar, Sugar coating, if you will.

Even in his "official" work for Archie Comics, you can smell the conservative right through the page.

One recurring theme is that Jughead's love of food and disinterest in girls are not two separate traits, but rather one single pathological obsession with food that causes him to eat because he isn't dating.

That, of course, is a problem to be fixed. Jughead Jones sits around thinking about how 36-24-36 girls are the best type of girl???? Really, Mr. Hartley???

And forget what I said about sympathetic portrayals of Ethel. This is how she gets her happy ending. As a hot dog.

Hartley's reign of terror actually started in the 60s, but by the 70s his art (and often writing) have become immediately distinguishable. The tells are in the girls' eyes (Betty's especially) and in Jughead's nose, which under Hartley's pencil starts to shrink near his face.

Oh, and this face thing, and the triple punctuation marks.

This is a typical set of Hartley panels showcasing all his trademarks except Jughead's nose.

And the fact that his Reggie never stops making this face.

His official Archie work, while slightly restrained, still shows an inherent worship of authority (A sixteen year old girl looking at her principal and thinking she feels sorry for “that cute man”??????? What????)

....and a sense of emptiness within the characters, waiting to be filled by... something.

His openly Jesus-y comics would revisit this theme, over and over again.

And one wonders if he was really as burned out on cheesecake as he claimed.

Yeah, he was barely holding himself back in a few different ways.

(These are three different stories taking place on the beach where the Archie characters spend about half their natural life cycle. The last one has no writer credited anywhere, but they’re Hartley’s pencils and the themes are quite similar to his two confirmed “Veronica being a bitch to Archie at the beach” stories.)

A couple of Hartley stories stand out in a very weird way: his Veronica isn't just spoiled and domineering, she hardly even wants Archie to start with. And in these stories, Archie's interest in Veronica is paper-thin, held together only by the main conceit of the love triangle and the fact that man is born to sin. One senses a touch of the aggrieved self-shipper at work, and more often than not it comes at the expense of humor. Other writers and artists had fun with a mean Veronica; Al Hartley just wants her sinful ass to stop getting in his best girl Betty's way.

Boy, does he want her gone. She and Reggie often end up together in the Spire stories, in defiance of the prevailing canon since at least the 50s, which is that that Veronica’s willing to date Reggie if Archie doesn’t show up or blows it, but for whatever reason, Archie is her primary interest. She doesn’t like Reggie for his personality in any story where Reggie’s personality actually figures beyond “other boy”. Yet Hartley sees them as the snooty secondary couple, brought together by their love of vanity and other sins, and the fact that Betty must be Archie’s final choice at all costs.

At their best, Hartley’s stories touch on realistic insecurities and add a little human dimension to characters like Ethel and Betty.

At their worst, they remind you exactly how cynical those additions are. Hartley has no compunctions about mocking Ethel if that’s what the story needs. "That fellow just offered two cows for Big Ethel!" Betty cries, in the middle of a band/missionary performance by The Archies in India. "That's the best offer we ever had for Big Ethel!" Jughead laughs, as Ethel (on triangle, because of course) looks distressed in the corner. Archie tells Jughead not to joke, because the man is serious! Hartley Triple Exclamation Points!!!

These insecure characters could be anyone at all, because the only reason they show these insecurities is so Al Hartley can sell you, the reader, on fixing your own insecurities with his brand of Jesus. In his non-Archie comics, they’re replaced seamlessly with non-characters, and the only result is that it's less funny.

And of course, don’t forget: just because Al Hartley only draws white people in these Spire Christian Comics, that doesn’t mean there’s any kind of racism going on in good old Riverdale.

#archie comics #archieganda #content warning just about everything

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whorehour · 4 years

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Wishlist

SIDE NOTE: This was requested but while writing it i accidenly lost the ask beacuse im really dumb:( anyways i hope u like it maureen and im really sorry:((

sypnosis: a one-shot in which yeonjun struggles with buying the reader the perfect birthday present and in the midst of reliving some old memories, they create new ones. 2K WORDS

TW// mild use of vulgur language // very soft fluff

it was 2am when u heard something tick against your bedroom window. you tried to ignore but, it just kept getting louder. as you drew open the curtains you were met with the face of your beloved best friend, choi yeonjun.

"morning sleeping beauty" "its 2am" "the early bird catches the worm" he remarked as he climbed into your room and jumped onto your bed. you want to be mad at him from disturbing your precious sleep but, the truth is that this wasn't something new. it was quite normal for yeonjun to show up at your place at the strangest of times without any warning but that doesnt mean you weren't confused.

"what's all this about yeonjun" you weren't exactly pleased with this spontaneous visit you valued your sleep and yeonjun knew that. "whats this?" you asked as he shoves a crumbled up piece of paper in you face. "this my dear is your wishlist from when you were 8" "how did you get that?" "we made them together on your 8th birthday, here look you wrote that these are the things you want to acomolish in ten years" the memories of your 8th birthday came flooding back. your mum had invited your friends over for a party and after everyone had left you and yeonjun stayed outside in your backyard colouring. then, yeonjun suggest you make a wishlist list of all the things you wanted to accomplish together before your 18th birthday

"i cant believe you still have this" "of course i still have it, i keep everything that's precious to me." "so you snuk into my room at 2am just to show me this?" "yep!" he smiled clearly very proud of himself. he leaned his head against your beds headboard, his eyes sparkling brighter than any star in the sky. you had to admit that your best friend was indeed beautiful which is why you can't understand why he hasn't gotten a girlfriend yet. not that it bothered you, in fact it would’ve bothered you even more if he did. you've always had a little crush on yeonjun but you never even dared to reveal your true feelings for the sake of the friendship.

"hello? earth to y/n?" "oh sorry... thank you i love it, really" yeonjun mirrored your smile and with a playful glint in his eyes, he stood up and went back to the window and looked at you as if he was expecting you to follow him.

"what are you doing?" "read number 6" "mc donalds at 2am? really?? now??" "its 2am isn't it? hurry up birthday girl, im hungry" you blinked twice in confusion trying to process all that was happening. you ignorantly thought that the wishlist was the gift paying no attention to its contents, but of course there was always something more when it had to do with yeonjun.

"are you sure this is legal?" "probably not...hey, dont give me that look this was your idea" you and yeonjun were currently at an abandoned apartment building ready to check number 9 off the wishlist, having a picnic on the roof of an abandoned building under the stars. you had to admit, this birthday present was becoming quite scary, but the thought of getting caught doing something this stupid with your best friend was more than exciting. you finally reached the top floor and opened the door which lead to the roof. the apartment building its self was about 12 stories high so, you were quite high up.

"the views so pretty" "yeah... beautiful" you didn't notice how yeonjun was looking at you with so much love in his eyes. to him you were the most beautiful and precious thing and seeing the way your eyes twinkled with happiness made his heart skip a beat. if it weren't for your impatient whines to set everything up and start eating, he would've told you how he felt right then and there, but everything happens for a reason.

an hour later and you were both laying under the stars talking and laughing and sometimes not saying a word, the silence was never awkward between you two, in fact you found so much comfort in each others company that sometimes no words were needed.

"did you feel that?" "feel what?" "its raining" "what!? hurry grab the stuff lets-" you were starting to stand up when yoenjun pulled you back down. he reached inside his jean pockets and pulled out the whish list. "number 2" he said nonchalantly. number two was special to both of you. it was something you always wanted to do but never had the chance because your parents would scold you, over time you had forgotten about it...until now. yeonjun stood up and extended his hands to help you get up. he pulled you in close and started swaying from side to side.

"there's no music" you mumbled and right on que, he started humming your favourite song. it was a magical moment, just like you had dreamed about when you were eight. it felt like a movie scene and you didnt want it to end. yeonjun held you close as you rested your head against his chest and whispered and it was at that moment you both realised how deeply in love you were with each other.

"you know, when i was eight years old i considered myself a great artist. however, today...not so much” "come y/n its the last thing on the list we have to do it" "alright fine, open the paint bucket" number 10 was very... ambitious. you wanted to paint a disney castle on one of your bedroom walls. sure the idea was cute, but it would've been cuter if it was done by a professional and not by two teenagers who can barely draw stick figures. but alas, yeonjun insisted to stick to the list and so, here you both where, ready to (ruin) paint over your white bedroom wall.

"ready y/n?" "nope" "good"

"THATS SO NOT A CASTLE" "WHAT DO MEAN ITS PERFECT" "lets just paint over it yeonjun" "no. we're leaving it as it is. its got character. you clearly dont understand art." "oh really? do you understand this" as the last word rolled off of your tongue, you painted a nice blue line across yeonjuns arm. he laughed for a second, then got serious and started running after you with a paint brush drenched in white paint. your bedroom filled with laughter and screams as yeonjun picked you up and pinned against the wall. he was so dangerously close to your face that you could feel his breath fan over your lips. you didn't move nor did you want to. yeonjun however, inching closer and closer until you could feel his soft pink lips on yours. the kiss was soft and short after two seconds he pulled back with wide eyes an apology already prepared, but you didnt give him any time to say a word, instead you wrapped your arms around his neck tightly and drew him into a deeper kiss. yeonjun finally relaxed and melted in your embraced as he kissed you back with so much love and passion. his hands snaked around your waist and pulled you closer if that was even possible. you could feel his tongue poke against your lips asking for permission and you willingly let him in. as your tongues battled for danced around in each other’s mouths, yeonjun wrapped his hands around your thighs and lifted you up. you wrapped your legs around his waist as he walked towards the bed where he laid you down softly.

"you sure this is ok?" he whispered above you.

"more than ok...please, dont stop again" that was enough for yeonjun to strip off his shirt and go back to kissing you. his lips travelled down towards your jaw and down to your neck. he started to kiss all over your neck.until he found your sweet spot. the sound of your breathless moans cause yeonjuns pants to tighten as he littered hickies all over your neck. he pulled back to admire his work and his eyes travelled upwards to find a bright smile on his face. yeonjun felt his heart flutter as the sight and leaned in again to place a chaste kiss on your lips before pulling your top over your head.

"you're so beautiful" he whispered as his littered kisses all over your chest and stomach. his kisses kept getting lower and lower untill he reached the waistband of your sweats. "may i?" he asked to which you eagerly nodded. he removed your sweatpants dangerously slow which cause you to whine in impatience, earning a breathless laugh from the man above you. you were getting impatient by how slow things were moving so you flipped yeonjun over and sat on his lap. his reaction was priceless, eyes wide and mouth opened ever so slightly he looked like a deer in headlights. he watched eagerly as you reached behind your back to remove your bra and tossed it wherever.

the sight in fornt of yeonjun was enough for him to buck his hips upwards. his hands travelled towards your chest as you bent down to kiss him again while grinding on him. yeonjun couldn't help but moan, he flipped you over again and stripped himself of his pants and boxers. "like what you see?" yeonjun laughed at your wandering eyes. you didnt respond instead pulled him into another deep kiss but this time it was sloppier. yeonjuns hands slid down and removed your underwear, his lips never leaving yours. you could feel him lining himself into your entrance and gripped his arms which caused yeonjun to pull away from the kiss. “dont worry, i got you... i wont hurt you i promise” you trusted yeonjun with your life and you couldn't feel safer with him, but you were still nervous. he pushed inside of you and you winced and the streched. yeonjun didn't move a muscle he was so scared of hurting that he waited for your command before he started moving his hips. he kissed your lips to distract you from the pain

"i love you" he whispered "i love you too"yeonjun buried his head into your neck and soon, the pain turned into pleasure and you started moaning in yeonjuns ears."f-faster" you moaned out. yeonjun didnt hesitate to buck his hips forward at a faster rate. he sat up and lifted your legs over his shoulders and moaned at the feeling of your warm walls wrapped tightly around his length. the view of yeonjun moaning and bitimg his lips as his hear stuck to hia forehead due to the sweat, had you moaning and cleanching around him

"fuck- stop that or ill- fuck" he continued to pound into you not caring how loud the two of you were being. yeonjun looked at you and could tell by the way your face was twisting and how you were tightening around him that you were close."come with me baby" his growled in your ear. his voice alone was enough to send you over the edge as you came on his dick. the feeling of your walls pulsing around him caused him to pull out and come on your stomach. the view of yeonjun moaning as he came on you was breathtaking. daringly, you scooped up his cum from your stomach and placed your digits in your mouth, sucking every finger while keeping eye contact with yeonjun. yeonjun moaned at the sight and scooped up the remaining cum and shoved his fingers into your mouth and watched in awe as you sucked his fingers clean. after he pulled his fingers out he leaned in and kissed you once again, tasting himself on your tongue.

he pulled himself back and laid beside you as you both started up at the ceiling, trying to process all that just happened. "well, that wasn't on the list" you laughed and yeonjun joined in as he pulled you closer. you rested your head against his chest and wrapped your arms around his figure after pulling the covers over both of you. yeonjun kissed the top of your head lovingly and whispered "i love you" “i love you too...we still need to paint over that castle by the way." "ssshhh dont ruin the moment"

#yeonjun soobin beomgyu taehyun heuningkai txt tommorowbytogether yeonjunsmut yeonjun fluff kpop requested imsosorry

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sneakymalou · 4 years

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So, how about! Our fellow reader is an artist, and they need to do a painting to fill up the last page of their portfolio, so he offers to model for them. However, he goes into the other room while they’re sorting out a paint pallet when he comes out nude and just sits on the sofa casually posing? Maybe some suggestions of nsfw?? *insert eyebrow wiggle here* 😏😏😏😏♥️♥️♥️

Like I said, I just LOVED your idea ♥♥ We're always craving for Raihan content 😍🌺 Hope you'll like it 🍓

Pairing : Raihan x Reader 💕

“Oh gosh, I completely forgot to put that last draw on my book ! Damn... I don’t have any...” you whispered to yourself, knowing far too well how vital this portfolio were for you. For a moment, thinking this through was the only thing you could do. A minute ago you texted Raihan, the dragon-type gym leader about your art and he came without hesitation. At first, you didn’t think of him as a model, but his slender silhouette inspired you instantly. “Sooo... you’re sure you’re okay to be my model ?” you asked him again, a sweet smile on your face. Of course, your man nodded energetically, adding no word to it. “Make yourself comfortable, I’m gonna sort out my paint wallet and all my tools !” Without knowing exactly why, you’ve never been so happy in your life. Maybe because it was him and no one else...

After only a little while, you came back in the living room, arms filled with brushes and all tools you would need. “I’m baaaack !” you said happily, before stopping yourself in front of the marvelous vue you were seeing. Nude. Raihan was completely nude before you, smiling like a little devil. He was clearly proud of himself ! “What ? You said you needed a model, right ?! Well, that’s me, being a model !” You swallowed with difficulty, trying to look elsewhere. “Hum... you want me to do the scene of Titanic ?” you joked a little before putting yourself back together. The artist was back in no time, taking a soft sheet to cover him and do an artistic nude drawing. Maybe the very idea to draw Raihan like Rose in the Titanic movie made you happier. Professional from top to bottom, you helped him laying down on your couch, only placing the sheet to cover him artistically. The vue was even more beautiful when you sat before him, proud to be in your own shoes. “Try to stay still if possible...” you almost mumbled, suddenly shy. It took a few second to put anything on place, and to decide how to draw exactly. Well, for this time, charcoal had your preference. “Wow... I’ve never seen you that serious !” he giggled, incapable of taking his eyes off you. You would never know, but he found you as beautiful as an true goddess...

For quite some time, silence filled the air, you trying your best to draw him beautifully, and him keeping his place. Laying down his facial features on paper was easy, but when it came to somewhere else of his body... you blushed with no warning. Of course, Raihan saw it right away and smiled with pride. “The artist is all red now...” he said jokingly, making fun of your embarrassment. “Are you drawing what I think you’re drawing ?” Before your silence, he burst out of laughter. “Keep quiet !” you said in authority, eyebrow frown. Your art was a serious deal, and Raihan or not, it had to satisfy you. But before you could say anything else, the gym leader came closer, holding the sheet artistically. Cheeks all red, you almost dropped your charcoal pen. “What about drawing me like this ?” Damn. Was he playing with you ? After all, you had been close friends since forever... but if your feelings became more and more strong over the years, you never said a word about it. “Raihan, I...” you started but you couldn’t finish. His lips captured yours, holding you tight against him, pressing you to the next wall. Time stopped. Your hearts beated in unison, echoing both of your feelings.

How many years did you waste, avoiding the truth like that ? Way too much. But regrets were useless. “Sweetheart... the draw could wait, I want you. All of you...” he whispered to your ear, eating your pale skin with kisses. He carried you like a bride, in his strong arms, to your room. Again, time stopped beautifully. Later, you would draw him so many times he only could make you pay with kisses and sweet hugs. And after that, he would be his turn... to take pictures of you. Needless to say, you will both agree to stay together forever. Never leave each other again...

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rhosyn-du · 4 years

Text

Title: A Wonderful Institution Artist: @bidnezz Pairings: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, various background pairings Word Count: ~53k Warnings: graphic depictions of violence, discrimination against Downworlders, reference to rape, Clave-typical homophobia, implied character death, minor character death Summary: Magnus doesn’t have time for this bullshit. Warlocks are disappearing in New York City—five people in less than three months—and Magnus is determined to find them and protect the rest of his people from whatever took them. He doesn’t have time for politics, and he certainly doesn’t have time for whatever nonsense the Clave is proposing about marrying a Shadowhunter to a Downworlder as part of the new Accords. He doesn’t really have time for a pretty Shadowhunter who’s surprisingly kind to warlock children, either, but, well, he’s always been good at multitasking.

Alec always knew he couldn’t have what he wanted, but he’s spent the nearly four years since the newly-appointed Consul recalled his parents to Idris without explanation making the best of what he can have. When life suddenly offers up almost everything Alec actually wants on a silver platter, he can’t quite bring himself to trust it, especially when it comes with a million caveats and a side of impending disaster. But he knows how to handle disasters, even if the return of the Circle on top of Clave secrets that could destroy the Accords is way beyond the disasters he’s used to fielding. Hope, on the other hand? He doesn’t know what to do with that.

This fic was created for the @malecdiscordserver Mini Bang 2020.

Chapter Nine

“Izzy, I need your help.”

Izzy’s head snapped up from her microscope to look at her brother in concern. “One second,” she said, scribbling something on the notepad next to her. “I’m looking at those samples Luke sent us.”

“Yeah, no hurry,” Alec said, trying hard to calm his restlessness. It was huge progress that the werewolves were willing to share some of the information they’d gathered on the murdered mundanes, both in the investigation and in terms of relations between the Clave and the Downworld. His minor personal crisis could wait.

Izzy gave him a sidelong glance that made Alec realize he was doing a terrible job of not fidgeting.

“I’ll wait outside,” he offered.

“I only need five minutes,” Izzy promised, “and then I’m all yours. I just want to make sure I’ve got these calculations right before I draw any conclusions.”

In reality, it only took Izzy three minutes to finish, for which Alec was extremely grateful.

“What did you find?” he asked when she stepped out of the lab.

“There’s a compound in all of the blood samples,” she told him. “I think it might be why they were taken. And now that we know from Luke that they were all mundanes with the Sight and that it was probably the Circle buying blood from the demons, that might help us narrow down what’s going on.”

“It’s somewhere to start, anyway,” Alec agreed.

“So,” Izzy said, “what’s the latest emergency?”

“It’s not an emergency.” Alec shrugged, going for nonchalance. Izzy’s raised eyebrows told him he hadn’t quite managed it.

“Spill, big brother.”

“I have a date tonight,” Alec said quickly. “With Magnus. And I don’t really know— Look, can you just tell me if the shirt I picked to wear is okay?”

Izzy’s grin, which had been growing as he talked, turned into full-throated, delighted laughter when he finished.

“You know what, never mind,” Alec said, turning to walk away.

“No!” Izzy said, grabbing his arm. “I won’t laugh anymore, I promise. I’m just happy for you, Alec. Come on, show me your shirt.”

They’d almost made it to Alec’s room when they were interrupted by an urgent, “Sir!”

Alec turned, ready to face whatever new disaster had cropped up. He only hoped Clary hadn’t tried to sneak out of the Institute again.

“What is it?”

“An envoy from the Clave just arrived,” Underhill told him. “I thought you’d want to be notified immediately.”

Alec nodded. “Thank you.” Not that the Clave had told him they were sending any envoy. This was charmingly ominous.

He turned to Izzy, who simply patted his arm. “Go. I’ll find you something decent to wear tonight.”

“Something I’d actually wear, Iz,” Alec warned. At her nod, he added, “Thank you.”

The woman he found inspecting the ops center was younger than he expected, with blonde hair pulled back in a tidy braided updo and sharp blue eyes.

“Lydia Branwell,” she introduced herself as soon as Alec stepped into the room. “The Clave sent me to oversee a smooth transition of power for the newly appointed Head of the Institute.”

“Alec Lightwood,” he said with a tight smile. “Head of the New York Institute and Acting Head for nearly four years before that. I’m sure there won’t be any problems related to transitions of power.”

Lydia nodded. “Even so, with your recent wedding and the upcoming signing of the Accords, not to mention the return of the Circle, the Clave thinks it would be best if you had someone around to make sure things go smoothly.”

“So, you’re a baby-sitter,” Alec said bluntly.

“Some people probably think so,” she said, just as blunt. “It can’t have escaped your notice that there are those in Idris who are concerned about the prospect of someone married to a Downworlder running an Institute.”

“No, but I assumed that if there were any serious objections, the Council wouldn’t have given the Institute to me in the first place.”

“I’m pretty sure I’m the compromise,” Lydia told him. “From what little I’ve seen so far, you run a tight ship. Don’t screw things up, and I can be out of your hair in a month or two.”

“And what do you think about a Shadowhunter who’s married to a Downworlder running an Institute?” Alec asked.

Lydia shrugged. “I think there’s nothing wrong with a political marriage, and it would be silly to penalize someone for making a pragmatic decision.” She looked at him. “The only problem would be if your loyalty to the Clave were compromised. As long as it’s not, you have nothing to worry about.”

The words were simple, but they didn’t exactly give Alec hope. He was loyal to the Clave, but there were so many different things someone could use as an excuse to decide he wasn’t. This was not a complication he needed.

Alec put on his best professionally polite smile. “Why don’t you let me show you around?”

It took exactly a minute and a half for Magnus to realize that The Hunter’s Moon was maybe not the best place to take Alexander on their first date. It wasn’t that the atmosphere was wrong or that there was anything wrong with their drinks (although IPAs apparently weren’t Alec’s drink, either, but Magnus was determined to figure it out). It was just the way people kept watching them. Not overtly, of course. Just little sidelong glances that made it feel like they were on display.

“Perhaps a mundane pub would have been a better choice,” Magnus said. “We can always try somewhere else, if you’d rather?”

“No,” Alec said, shaking his head. “This is— It’s fine. It makes sense for people to be curious. We did just have a very public, very politically important wedding. It’s natural for people to be curious. They probably just want to make sure we aren’t on the verge of killing each other and breaking the Accords.” He took a deep swig of his beer, and Magnus noticed that his grimace was at least slightly less intense this time. “Besides, I can’t imagine being more comfortable surrounded by mundanes.”

“There is something to be said for not having to hide,” Magnus agreed. He nodded toward the pool table in the corner. “Do you fancy a game?”

Alec glanced over, a tiny smile appearing on his face. “Sure. Sounds fun.”

Two games in, Alec finally seemed to lose the tension that he’d been holding in his shoulders since he’d shown up at the loft earlier in the evening. They were well matched in both skill at the game and competitiveness, and they’d each managed to win a game.

“I think I’m going to grab another refill before I beat you again,” Magnus said, brandishing his empty glass.

“You mean before I beat you again,” Alec corrected with a grin.

“I said what I said.”

“Come on,” Alec said. “I might as well get another drink, myself.”

Maia, the werewolf bartender, greeted them with a smile. Magnus only knew her in passing, but she was one of the few people here tonight who hadn’t treated them any differently than any other patrons, and that went a long way in his book.

“What can I get for you boys?”

“A Manhattan for me,” Magnus said. He glanced at Alec, who looked no less lost than he had when they’d ordered their first round.

“Something that isn’t beer or too sweet?” Alec said after a moment of consideration.

“Gin martini,” Magnus suggested. “Extra dirty,” he added, with a grin for Alec, who responded with a tolerant head shake for his innuendo.

“Coming right up,” Maia promised, grabbing a shaker.

“I suppose we both have a healthy dose of the competitive spirit,” Magnus observed.

“I grew up with Jace,” Alec said. “I didn’t have much choice. And I’m sure it didn’t help that Izzy encouraged us both.”

Magnus was dimly aware of a phone ringing as he picked up their drinks. It wasn’t his phone or Alec’s, so he didn’t pay it much attention. He watched with interest as Alec sipped his drink, and for the first time, didn’t wince.

“This is nice,” Alec said, clearly surprised. “Salty and...kind of green?”

Magnus beamed, happy to have finally found a drink Alec liked. “That’s the juniper in the gin.”

“Wait, slow down.” Magnus turned around at Maia’s panicked voice to find her talking furiously on her phone. “Shit. Where are you? East side or west side? No, I’ll be right there, don’t panic.”

She turned to the other bartender on duty, shouting that there was a pack emergency and she’d be right back.

“No, don’t hang up,” Maia insisted into the phone. “I can— I’ll get someone else to call. You keep talking to me so I know you’re safe.”

She turned and grabbed the arm of the nearest person, who happened to be Magnus. “I need you to call Luke,” she said urgently. “Gretel is being hunted by a pack of demons over by Foley Square. I’m going after her, but I need backup.”

“Of course,” Magnus said, pulling out his phone.

“I’ll call Luke,” Alec said without missing a beat. “Magnus, can you make a portal to Foley Square?” At his nod, Alec turned back to Maia. “We’re not your pack, but we can be your backup until they get there.”

Maia gave him a quick, assessing once over, then nodded. “Thanks, Shadowhunter,” she said, before turning back to her phone.

Magnus wasn’t entirely sure where Gretel was, and he wasn’t as familiar with this part of the city as he was with other parts of New York, so they had to run a few blocks from the portal before they caught up with Gretel.

The pale-furred werewolf was backed up to a brick wall, in full wolf form, facing off with half a dozen Ravener demons. She had several lacerations on her forequarters and was stumbling in a way that suggested she was already suffering severe effects of demon venom.

What surprised Magnus, though, was the woman who stood behind the demons, holding her own portal open.

It wasn’t that Magnus was surprised that Iris Rouse would summon a pack of demons, or even that she’d use them for nefarious purposes. She’d always skirted the edges of the law, and her attempts to breed new warlocks showed that she didn’t exactly care about the welfare of others or the Accords.

No, what was surprising was the vacant look in her eyes and the black veins running across her face and up her arms.

Before Magnus had time to do much more than register Iris’s identity and appearance, Maia had shifted to her wolf form and launched herself at the redheaded warlock.

“Try to leave her alive so we can question her,” Alec called as he pulled a short seraph blade from his thigh holster and expertly dispatched the nearest Ravener demon.

Between Maia and Magnus, it took very little time to subdue Iris. She was less powerful than Magnus to begin with, and she was also clearly not at the top of her game. If the strange black veins weren’t enough of a hint, her magic was muted and more erratic than it should be.

As soon as they had Iris contained, Maia rushed off to help Alec and Gretel with the remaining demons. Iris stared up at Magnus from where he had her pinned magically to the ground.

“Madzie,” she gasped. “Is Madzie safe?”

It wasn’t what Magnus expected, and he found himself nodding before he could even consider whether it was a good idea to answer.

“She’s safe. Far away from you,” he added.

Iris scowled at him, body shaking like someone in the throes of drug withdrawal. “You can’t keep her from me. But for now, she’s safe, and that’s all that matters.”

“Safe from what?” Magnus wondered. “Iris, what are you doing here?”

“Don’t you know yet?” Iris laughed bitterly through her spasms. “Valentine. He’s back, and he’s experimenting on Downworlders, on warlocks, making us—” She cut off into a pained scream, convulsing.

Reaching out with his magic, Magnus did his best to calm her, but without knowing what was causing the convulsions, he was at a loss. He was a decent healer when he knew what he was dealing with, but something like this, that he’d never seen before, that he knew nothing about other than “Valentine’s experiments,” was beyond him.

A hand landed on Magnus’s shoulder, and he looked over to find Alexander, helping Maia support an unconscious Gretel.

“I can’t help both of them,” Magnus said. “Not and keep Iris contained if she starts to recover.”

“We can take them to the Institute,” Alec said. “You can treat Iris in one of the cells, and we’ve got materials for treating demon venom in the infirmary.”

“I don’t think so,” Maia said. “I appreciate the help, but I’m not letting you take one of my pack back to your Institute.”

“Nothing will happen to her, I promise.” Alec said.

“Yeah, no thanks,” Maia said. “You might be all right, Lightwood, but I don’t exactly trust the rest of your kind. Take the warlock. She tried to hurt one of ours, so you can do what you want to her as long as you share whatever information you get out of her. The rest of my pack will be here soon, and we can take care of Gretel.”

Alec nodded with obvious reluctance.

“Luke has my number if you need more help with her injuries than you can give,” Magnus said.

Maia nodded her thanks, then motioned for them to go.

Healing Iris proved to be an involved process that required several potions the Institute kept regularly stocked and calling in Cat for help, but they eventually left her peacefully unconscious instead of convulsing in a well-guarded cell. A blonde Shadowhunter Alec irritably introduced as Lydia promised to call as soon as Iris regained consciousness, so Magnus portalled himself and Alec back to the loft.

“So,” Magnus said as they entered the loft, “this wasn’t exactly how I imagined our first date.” It wasn’t the most disastrous first date he’d ever been on, or even the first that involved a demon-related disaster, but it wasn’t exactly a success, either.

“Me either,” Alec agreed, tossing his jacket over the back of the couch. “But it was fun until, you know, demons. Maybe next time we should just stay in?”

Even tired as he was from the fight and healing Iris, Magnus couldn’t help the smile that split his face. Alexander wanted there to be a next time.

“Absolutely not,” he said. Alec looked at him surprised, and Magnus hurried to explain. “Alexander, I’m a warlock. I can portal us literally anywhere in the world. Maybe New York wasn’t the best choice under the circumstances, but you have to at least give me a chance to sweep you off your feet.”

Alec smiled one of those beautiful, genuine smiles that Magnus couldn’t get enough of. “I think you've got that covered regardless of where we are.”

“But no demons next time,” Magnus said, smiling back.

“No demons,” Alec agreed before leaning in to brush his lips against Magnus’s.

And maybe, Magnus figured, the date wasn’t a total disaster.

Alec couldn’t tell if there was actually something wrong that his subconscious was picking up on, or if he just wasn’t used to not being in crisis mode anymore. It had been almost two weeks since he’d gotten married, recovered the Mortal Cup, and rescued/captured Iris Rouse, and six days since the signing of the updated Accords. He and Magnus—and eventually Lydia, who it turned out was surprisingly easy to work with—had spent several days questioning Iris, gathering all of the information she had to give them about those who had captured her.

Iris had confirmed that she’d been taken by the Circle, and that Valentine was alive, which wasn’t news to Alec or Magnus, but now it was official knowledge, which was a huge weight off of Alec’s back. Iris hadn’t exactly been willing to talk to Shadowhunters, but her hatred for the Circle and the horrors they’d put her through proved greater than her hatred for those who had her imprisoned now. She’d told them that Valentine was experimenting on Downworlders, that he’d managed to create some kind of serum that allowed him to control warlocks—those that it didn’t kill, anyway—and he was using them to summon the packs of demons that were capturing other Downworlders. It sounded almost like he was building an army of mind-controlled Downworlders.

Much to both Magnus’s and Clary’s disappointment, Iris hadn’t seen Dot.

They’d sent Iris to Idris to stand trial along with a note from Alec that she’d been very helpful in providing information on Valentine and the Circle. Not that he expected it would have much of an impact on her sentence given all she’d done. If the Clave let her live, he would be very surprised.

What hadn’t gone back to Idris was the Mortal Cup, and maybe that was why Alec was so on edge. Consul Penhallow knew they’d recovered it, had known since the night it happened, but insisted that it was safer in a vault at the New York Institute that only she and Alec had access to than it would be in Alicante right now. Which, honestly, did not give Alec a lot of confidence in what the Council was doing or in the Clave’s ability to take on Valentine in any kind of meaningful way. Consul Penhallow promised to send word as soon as she deemed it safe to transport the Cup, but so far, she hadn’t sent it.

Magnus had gotten word of three more missing warlocks, but none of those disappearances had yielded any more information than they already had.

Then there was Clary Fairchild. Despite knowing that they were searching for Jocelyn, despite being involved in the process herself, she’d made repeated attempts to sneak out of the Institute to go looking on her own. She’d been working with Magnus to gather intel using the portal shard, which along with the information they’d gathered from Iris had given them a pretty good idea of what the inside of Valentine’s hideout looked like. Iris was able to give them a rough location and said she suspected the hideout was on the water, but that still gave them many square miles to search. Ragnor was working on getting a more precise location but tracking the potion he’d made for Jocelyn was apparently a long and involved process.

It was the waiting that was making him twitchy, Alec decided. Waiting and not being able to do anything. He was used to taking action, and there hadn’t been any actions for him to take since they’d sent Iris to Idris.

“Do you really dislike musicals this much, or are you thinking about work again?”

Alec let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding and forced himself to relax into the couch and against Magnus’s side. “Sorry,” he said, attempting to turn his attention back to the dancers on the screen. “I guess I’m a little distracted.”

It was their fifth date. Alec was absolutely counting. Magnus had taken him to Tokyo and London. Alec had taken Magnus to his favorite burger joint in the East Village. They had miraculously entirely avoided demon attacks. And, yeah, it might be a little bit weird to be dating the guy he was married to, but it was the only thing in Alec’s life that wasn’t giving him a headache. Magnus was amazing and fun to be around and better at kissing than should probably be legal.

This was the first date they’d actually spent at the loft. During the course of their previous dates, Magnus had discovered what he insisted was Alec’s “tragic lack of cinematic literacy” and vowed to fix it. Which is how they’d ended up snuggled up on the couch eating pizza (Alec’s choice) and watching a film Alec was pretty sure was about a writer who's obsessed with a cabaret performer who can sing remarkably well for someone with tuberculosis (Magnus’s choice), but he honestly hadn’t been paying close enough attention to be certain.

It wasn’t at all how Alec had pictured this date going. He’d thought, or maybe just hoped, that Magnus’s suggestion they stay at the loft meant Magnus was just as ready as he was to take their physical relationship further. He’d been thinking about it half the day, and now that he was actually here, with Magnus, alone in their loft with a whole night to themselves, his mind was consumed with worries about work and everything that might go wrong.

Sometimes, Alec thought his mind was a real dick.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Magnus offered.

Alec shook his head. “I want to be able to stop thinking about it. I’m sorry, Magnus, this isn’t fair to you.”

“Seems like it’s not fair to you, either,” Magnus said with a shrug. “You’re the one spending your night off worrying about work.”

“I guess.” Alec didn’t want to admit that this wasn’t exactly an unusual occurrence for him. Before he’d met Magnus, most of his nights off were spent worrying about work, or his family, or the intersection of those two things.

Magnus sighed and paused the movie. “If the film isn’t enough to distract you, then we’ll have to find something else that can.”

It wasn’t, for a wonder, said with even the slightest hint of innuendo, but Alec arched his eyebrows anyway. “What exactly did you have in mind?”

“Well,” Magnus said, answering Alec’s teasing grin with one of his own, “I didn’t have anything specific in mind before, but when you ask like that, I think perhaps I have an idea.”

“Yeah?” Alec asked, leaning in and crowding Magnus against the arm of the couch. “What’s that?”

Magnus grinned, then held up the tiramisu he’d apparently summoned from the takeout bag they’d left in the kitchen. “Dessert.”

“I think dessert could definitely distract me,” Alec said, taking the container and plastic forks and deliberately placing them on the coffee table.

Magnus’s mouth was hot and eager against his own and sent all thoughts of Valentine and the Mortal Cup and Circle spies in Alicante flying out of his head. It amazed Alec, as it always did, how easy this was. Not the actual kissing—there was definitely a learning curve there, but he thought he was doing okay with it—but just being together, wanting each other, like it was the simplest, most natural thing in the world.

Alec let his hand slide beneath the hem of Magnus’s shirt, fingers tracing the ridge of abs under skin smooth as silk, and let his thoughts and senses fill with nothing but Magnus. The way Magnus’s mouth moved against his. The press of Magnus’s body. The tingle Magnus’s fingers left behind as they made their way down the side of his neck and along his collarbone.

Alec broke the kiss with a gasp, desperate for air, only to have his breath stolen in the next instant when Magnus’s mouth followed the same path his fingers had moments earlier.

“Magnus,” he gasped, arching into the touch. There was a thought forming there, something he’d wanted to do. Or to ask? If he could just catch it. “Magnus,” he said again, more firmly as if that could help corral his own thoughts.

“Hmm?” Magnus murmured, his mouth moving up the other side of Alec’s neck, tracing the shape of his deflect rune.

“We could—” The words were right on the tip of his tongue, the thought on the tip of his brain. “Could we—?” There. “Bedroom?”

Okay, so, not the most eloquent way he could have phrased it, but Alec thought he got the message across. He was actually pretty proud of himself for being able to form words at all.

At least, he was until Magnus pulled away.

“Alexander.” Magnus’s face was guarded in a way that made Alec’s guts churn. This was not at all the reaction he’d been hoping for. Or expecting.

“Do you not want to?” Alec guessed. He’d thought they were on the same page. Every touch, every kiss, seemed to indicate that Magnus wanted Alec just as much as Alec wanted him, but maybe he’d been reading the signs wrong.

“I do,” Magnus was quick to assure him. “It’s just, it’s rare that I’ve ever felt this way about someone, and—” He looked away. “And there are things I haven’t told you, things I probably should have told you a long time ago. Things I need to tell you before we take our relationship any further.”

“Magnus, you can tell me anything,” Alec said, ignoring the queasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. He didn’t want to imagine what kind of secret would make Magnus this nervous. “Or choose not to tell me, but if it’s worrying you so badly, I’m willing to listen.”

Magnus grabbed the tiramisu from the table, holding it out both in offering and like a shield between them. Alec took it and popped open the plastic container, then offered Magnus a plastic fork. Magnus had tried to insist they eat with actual silverware, but Alec managed to convince him it wasn’t real takeout if you did it that way.

Magnus took the fork, then spent a ridiculously long time poking at the dessert, before saying, “You never asked me why I put my name forward to be a part of this marriage.” His eyes were still fixed firmly on his fork. “And I know I offered an explanation, but it wasn’t precisely accurate.”

Alec frowned. “I don’t understand.”

“I didn’t put my name forward at all,” Magnus told him, finally meeting his eyes. “I wasn’t the person the Downworld leaders chose. My name wasn’t even on the list.”

“But,” Alec said, “then why did you say you were?”

“The Spiral Council wanted me to volunteer, but I refused. But then we were sitting there in that meeting and…you looked so sad,” Magnus said with a helpless shrug. “Like you did when I asked you over for drinks. And I thought— No, that’s not true either. I wasn’t thinking at all, not really. I just didn’t want you to be sad anymore, and I guess I figured I could work out the details later.”

It was Alec’s turn to stare at the tiramisu. He didn’t know what to think, how to feel. “Do you regret it?” he asked finally.

“No,” Magnus said without hesitation. “I keep expecting to, if I’m honest, but no. I thought I could talk you out of it at first, and by the time I realized I couldn’t...” He shrugged again. “I couldn’t stand the thought of you looking that sad again, or the thought of you marrying someone else.”

“Magnus…” Alec struggled to find the words for what he was feeling. It was a lot to take in.

But whatever words he might have come up with were interrupted by a sudden, frantic pounding on the front door. Magnus sprang to his feet, rushing toward the door, Alec close on his heels. Magnus looked concerned, but not alarmed, so Alec figured he didn’t need to run to the other room for his weapons, but he stayed close to Magnus just in case he needed backup.

Magnus flung open the door to reveal a frantic-looking Raphael.

“What happened?” Magnus demanded. “Are you all right?”

Raphael shook his head. “Ragnor is missing.”

#malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #fanfic

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