#probably the least negative i've been so far haha

[sallysellsseashellssundays]

Disclaimer: This post is going to be Anti Moffat for anyone who’s reading and is a fan you’ve been warned.  

“The Doctor’s Wife” is the 4th episode, I had actually been spoiled already and I knew Idris was going to be the TARDIS somehow, but I didn’t know anything else besides that. This has to be my favorite episode from S6 so far, and I think one of my favorites from the show as a whole.

The Good: Holy crap. The actors for Uncle, Aunt and Idris were just wow, absolutely phenomenal! Uncle and Aunt mouthing at the same time reminded me of Midnight, it was so frightening to see. Idris looking at herself in the mirror was one of the funniest moments lol. Eleven getting angry, whew, I think Matt pulled this off really well and I’d sort of missed seeing the Doctor mad. Then him getting emotional as they were saying goodbye was the best acting Matt’s done. Eleven talking to Idris at the end was really beautiful and it actually made me tear up a bit. Us being able to see the TARDIS corridors was super cool and House messing with Amy and Rory was an interesting part of the storyline. Idris communicating with “the pretty one” lmao I had to pause to laugh! We actually got to see the old console room again, and I got a little emotional at that as well. Rory being a nurse, and looking after Idris was lovely, he’s probably the most underused character but always really funny and nice when we see him.

The Bad: The Doctor sending Amy and Rory away, and him spending the entire time with Idris was necessary for the story...but I feel like literally every episode now is him not being with his friends at all, like they don’t do the adventures together :( The Doctor calling the TARDIS sexy sounds super cringe, I’m sorry but I couldn’t handle it I think my body started physically revolting at hearing it lol. Rory is dying every episode, it’s at a point where it’s actually a little funny which sucks because a main character dying should be an emotional thing IMO.  House messing with Amy and Rory wouldn’t have been as easily done if they’d hold hands, do they just never hold hands??

The Worst: Amy says the Doctor told her about what he did to the Time Lords, and that would have been such a beautiful moment to see between them. It would have shown the Doctor opening up to a friend but instead it just feels like we’re always told how close he and Amy are but we don’t see any of it!! We could have had a moment like with Ten and Martha talking in Gridlock :( I really dislike that he kept mentioning Idris was a woman at one point, and of course she had to be called “sexy” by him I feel like that really takes away from the TARDIS as a character if that makes sense.

The Unresolved: Idris told Rory something with the word river in it which I’m assuming has to do with River and/or The Doctor’s death, we’ll have to wait and see. I’m also a little unsure as to why the episode was called the way it was since I thought River was supposed to be his wife? I forgot to mention after the last episode but it annoyed me that Amy didn’t tell the Doctor or Rory about eye patch lady, she forgot about her the first time she saw her because of the Silence but there was no reason for her not to tell them this time except for very convenient story purposes.

Overall I thought this was the best episode of the series (so far), it instantly catapulted the TARDIS as a “character” to one of my favorites.

Honorable mention to all the other things besides the console room that reminded me of RTD’s era: them leaving the universe to a “bubble” universe (when I thought the walls were sealed?), the place being filled with rift energy made me think of Jack/Torchwood, and the poor Ood with the Doctor mentioning it was another one he couldn’t save :(

[meanbossart]

A long over-due ask compilation (Art & Music)

It's vaguely based on a short story from the book "The Consumer" by Michael Gira, specifically "The Boss". I think it came up in conversation with a friend or something when I was picking a new username, so that's how we arrived at it - this was almost a decade ago so, my memory on it is a little hazy!

{MORE UNDER THE CUT]

HAHA thank you so much!!! Glad you enjoy what I do 😎🍻

I BELIEVE this little guide I put together over here might be helpful to you, also! I touched on pretty much everything you brought up.

As for reference material when it comes to facial expressions, I have a mirror next to my desk which I glance at often and make weird faces at LOL and for consistency, it's really a matter of learning to dissect and remember facial structure. It's just something you end up developing an eye for when you've done it for long enough! Naturally, if we're talking about drawing existing characters, it's always helpful to just look at some pictures of their mugs and take a minute to define what features about them make their faces recognizable - I touch on this at the link above as well!

I do plan on making a "drowstarion" (love that, by the way LOL) playlist eventually, life's just been kicking my ass and I hardly have the time 😭and when I do, I just wanna draw.

Otherwise I don't have any other playlists floating around at the moment, BUT the one my boyfriend made for his Vellioth comic can be found here, and it might scratch a similar itch!

Thank you! I believe this was in reference to this post. Something like that takes me about... An hour??? If we're talking just the colors, at least. Though that's a really rough estimate because I take a lot of breaks, so my sense of time when I work ends up pretty skewed. Even if the application of the colors themselves took less than 20 minutes I probably spent 2 hours just staring at it LOL.

My friend, I have no idea. I'm in a constant battle between "I want to draw more realistically" and "I want to simplify my art so I can draw more/faster". What you see is the result of that ongoing brain-tug-of-war.

Also, just the way I assume everyone else develops theirs - they see stuff they like and emulate it until their art is Frankensteinish enough to be it's own unique thing!

I'm far from a Type O Negative buff, BUT I'm happy to share some of my favorites with you! They're quite scattered across a couple of their albums so I'm not sure I have a favorite, but I would say October Rust is a good starting point.

In no particular order, these are my most listened tracks of theirs: -Love You to Death -Black N.01 -Haunted -She Burned Me Down -Can't Lose You -I Don't Wanna Be Me -Be My Druidess -September Sun -Tripping A Blind Man

Alas, I was one of those people who was already drawing in kindergarten 😅 though I would say I only started taking it seriously when I was around 15-16 years old. As someone who has tried their hand at several other hobbies since reaching adulthood, I get what you're saying that it can kinda feel like... You missed the wagon? I've felt that way about all kind of things lol

That said, I've seen adults managing to develop their art skills extremely fast and effectively before. Understanding where and how you need to improve, and how to follow lessons/guides best is something that is vastly improved by maturity and knowing how to best hone your time, attention, and resources - and those are skills we completely lack as children. So, I sincerely believe that as long as you commit yourself, you can definitely get to a point that you're happy with in a couple of years if not less.

JUST DO IT BUDDY we are all just people looking through a screen and you won't ever see, talk, or meet 99% of the folks who ever clap eyes on what you post. Whenever you start getting nervous about sharing something, take a minute to ask yourself why you're nervous, and if none of the reasons have any genuine substance besides being afraid of what people "might think", just go ahead and post it. You're no mind-reader after all, and if you are, I doubt you can hear what a guy from Argentina or wherever is thinking about the art you made.

Point is, nobody online can touch you 🤷and if someone doesn't like what you do, they can simply choose to not interact with it, and if they do you can block and move on. There are zero reasons for you to feel "bad" about putting up a doodle when our experiences on the web are so easily curated nowadays.

[elwinsglasses]

shannon's editor essay please if i beg will you give it to me

Haha so sorry about that y'all I'm pretty sure I answered an ask or smth about that essay all the way back in March, and now it's uh *checks notes* August. Whoops. I dug back through my drafts and it turns out that the essay was pretty undeveloped lol, and part of the reason that I procrastinated so long was because I was too lazy to hunt down sources for some of the stuff. Also, at this point a lot of the stuff I was going to write about is (at least in my perspective) pretty common knowledge, so I didn't feel it was super important. Anyways though I'll probably never get around to getting it well organized so I'll just bullet point the general ideas. Also just in case this is all my theories/speculations and none of them have been proven.

So basically I had a kind of far-fetched theory about why the character development of Sophie/Fitz/Keefe in the later books but especially Unlocked/Stellarlune was Like That was because of Shannon's editor

Shannon had a baby I believe 2019/2021ish? and as expected her writing schedule was severely impacted bc obviously baby

And the result of that was that (for at least Stellarlune) her editor ended up drafting the general plot, and she would fill in the outlines (this was stated in I believe an instagram live or barnes and noble interview for Stellarlune. There was a post floating around her that summarized that event but for the life of the I can't find it)

Anyways if you're unfamiliar with Shannon's editor, she's a super pro Keefe/Sokeefer, and is the reason why Keefe is on a disproportionate amount of covers. That wouldn't necessarily be a big deal except I feel she's allowed it to color her view of the story, instead of focusing on what makes the most sense narratively speaking

Like my biggest issue as stated in my last post was how the narrative treats Keefe, esp at the beginning of Stellarlune

However, as a whole, I personally found the whole plot and character development of Stellarlune to be a little forced, instead of it feeling like a natural progression

Because Sophie in Legacy, after breaking up with Fitz, was like "hmm I don't think I'm ready to date anyone"

And I was absolutely here for that. However, in Stellarlune, which is set just a few weeks later, she suddenly knows her soulmate is Keefe

And honestly now that I've had time to mull on it, I do think it's not 100% her editor's fault.

Shannon has been writing Kotlc since she was 21, and has been at it for over 10 years. I imagine a lot of how she feels about Kotlc and the characters has changed significantly. Plus she as a person has changed significantly, and is now a mom of two. As such I think she probably also wants to be done with Kotlc, which probably also explains why the Stellarlune felt that way

Either way this is kind of a negative post lol, but I don't exactly blame either of them. I have the feeling Kotlc has worn out its welcome one way or another, and like it or not, the chapter is about to close soon. I still remember fondly how much I loved this book in my early teens, even as I wish it could have ended with more of a bang than a whimper.

[kindlystrawberry]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by @thebeckster, thank you so much!! I love doing these. Sorry this took me so long though, I got distracted by life and then totally forgot until I saw it again in my notes recently asdfasdf.

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 74 total!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 476,681 since 2018 :)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

A BIG variety, but my top 5 are: RF4 (by FAR, 38 fics), Good Omens (4), Tales of Series (4), Ace Attorney (4), Samurai Love Ballad (3)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Good Mornings (Good Omens)

The Space Between (Ace Attorney)

Glass Heart (ROTTMNT)

in your eyes (Ace Attorney)

The Waves (OFMD)

Those are all from the bigger fandoms I've written for, so that checks out! I'm quite proud of those :)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to respond to every one! I'm sure I've missed some but I generally at least try to thank someone for commenting, and I love engaging with people about fandom.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Uhhh I'll be honest, I write angst SO rarely that I don't really have one that ends angsty. I guess "Bruised" (Lovestruck/Starship Promise) because that's just the most generally angsty fic I've written, but it has a happy ending anyway lol.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I write almost exclusively fluff so they're all pretty happy in their endings. If I had to pick a happiest I'd probably say "Seasons" (Good Omens) just because it's so purely fluffy and sweet, and since they're literally immortal it basically promises fluff for the rest of time? Lol.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope! The most I've gotten is more like, confusion at a fic but even then it's never really been negative.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Haha... Yes. I think uh *checks notes* 4 times now? It's basically always a character study and also purely just. Fluff and with feelings, etc. etc.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not fully. The most I've done is a bit of a crossover between different games within the same series (so like, two Tales games, or two RF games) but even that is rare.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Don't think so!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not a full co-write! I've co-plotted a couple though that haven't quite made their way to fruition, and it was tons of fun. I'm also fortunate that whenever I've got writers block I can find a friend to whine to who will usually also give me ideas!

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

Mmmm this changes depending on what mood I'm in, but consistently I have always particularly loved and gone back to Phoenix/Miles (AA) and Crowley/Aziraphale (Gomens)

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Ohhhh man. Uh. So mnay. The MOST though would be an unpublished Dylas/Doug kid fic that's still sitting purely in my google docs. I've got 1/5 chapters written and it's like 10k long already lolol. I really, really want to finish that one but uhhh hard to say. Some others are:

Berseria poly-ish fic about fake dating

Doug and Dylas cowboy sequel

Asafure mermaid

Farcille bodyguard/musician AU

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm good at fluff, comedy, and dialogue! I like finding a fun dynamic between characters and really picking at it until I've got it, and then jotting it down!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Oh lord. I am AWFUL at angst, and awful at writing out longer things. I've tried so many times to write out longer things I've plotted and I just always lose steam/get bored/hate it.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I think it's great! I love reading it when other people do it. The only language I speak fluently besides English is Spanish, but even so my writing in it isn't the strongest, so I do get a bit self-conscious! Still, I enjoy it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

In general ever (back in 2013 on Quizzaz lmao) it was The Avengers. As far as AO3, since I started seriously writing again in 2018ish, it was Voltron!

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Oooooh, gosh it's hard. I can pick two. It's either "Glass Heart" (ROTTMNT) that I just absolutely poured my heart and soul into! I researched a lot, studied the dynamics and characters a lot (I literally have an analysis section in my document about their fears/wants/needs LOL), tried really hard to make it feel like episodes of the show (which I don't often do!), workshopped ideas with friends, and tried to balance plot/angst/fluff! I think it came out well and I'm proud of it :)

And my other answer is "Knowing You" (RF4) which is a fic that's for literally TWO PEOPLE only (me and Patt) because it's a rarepair on top of a rarepair, but I just like... wrote it SO easily. Those 28k (??) absolutely poured out of my soul and onto the page. I also did stuff I don't normally write (jealousy, angst, mild miscommunication) and I think I was able to resolve it well in the plot of the fic!

Tags: Absolutely zero pressure! And if anyone sees this who wants to do it but didn't get tagged, please feel free to just say I tagged you :) @randomstarmuffin, @punkaraoke, @spinachartichokeditz, @quinniehere, and uh anyone else who wants to I'm sorry I've forgotten people's tumblrs lol

[pynkhues]

Hey! I've been pondering this question for a while and wanted to ask you. What negative qualities that Louis and Lestat have will stay by the end of the series (whatever it will be) and what will transform due to character development? Do you believe vampires to be doomed by stagnation of their minds or do they can change and heal?

I have much clearer picture of Lestat's future development unlike Louis'. Lestat's vices are well known and lead to devastating consequences that will haunt him for a long long time. His withholding of information, including his story, his insecurities that make him lash out violently, his impulsivity. I don't think he'll be stripped away from these completely, but I think I know trajectory of his change.

Now, Louis is a tough case. While Lestat's and Claudia's relationship went out with a bang, Claudia and Louis had quiet separation, knowing they can't fulfill each other anymore as companions and going each their own way, with simmering resentment that didn't have enough time to blow up completely (aside from occasional moments). He feels like a failure regarding Claudia but unlike Lestat, (who could have potentially saved Claudia while leaving louis to death, but didn't), louis didn't any strength to do that during trial, partially because he and Claudia were in one position.

If we judge by dubaI dreamstat scene, it seems like louis is at least unconsciously aware, that he coddled Claudia, which he did, clearly not ready to face reality of his (and Lestat's) choice the night they turned her. Add Jacob's interview where he talked about Claudia being like Lestat while in his perfect world she would be his mini-me. Louis wanted redemption that night, yes, but I'd argue he also wanted someone like him to share life with, all qualities that he found charming in Lestat in the beginning by that time became aggravating because of his self-starving, moral suffering and adultery. He found a little girl who 1) he could save 2)could become their daughter, fulfilling him as parent and patching things up with Lestat again 3)he could raise in his image.

(maybe I'm in completely wrong field currently but we don't have enough information to know for sure heh.) But I have no idea how Louis can ever showcase character development regarding this particular flaw, with only solution on my mind being Rose and Victor's appearance as second chance on family with Lestat.

Now about his relationship with Lestat. Again, fandom seems to be more or less united on Lestat's faults in loustat. Louis, though, gets many opinions (victim, abuser, something in between etc) I was scared that show will go in "Lestat will have to change to earn louis bback while louis iis just living his life" trajectory but loustat final scene made me think it will not be the case (incredibly reductive for louis and boring for lestat). I saw many people being mad that louis "apologized to his abuser" but I'm so glad that "making nights miserable" got brought up! I was convinced that it's one of those moments where show's ideas and mine diverge, but nope, it was acknowledged by show and louis to be something negative! Clearly a set up for character arc.

I'm so so sorry for long ass post, I needed to rant it seems. What are your thoughts?

Hey! And yeah, it's an interesting area to think about. I think the show's invested in showing character development and growth, but I tend to think that development and growth probably won't be linear? It certainly hasn't been for Louis so far, and I think the acknowledgement of his own flaws (I love him admitting that he tried to make nights awful for Lestat too!) doesn't necessarily mean progress on them (although it is a first step).

I agree about Lestat's flaws being pretty clear / agreed upon broadly, and I agree too that there seems to be a lot of disagreement about Louis' flaws, haha . It's an interesting area to think about, because I actually think Louis' flaws in a lot of ways can be more interesting sometmes than Lestat's?

I'd tend to say there are two major ones. The first, I think, is that he's inherently motivated by his own interests and is willing to compromise ethics and dehumanise others in order to achieve what he wants. We see this on many fronts, both on a work/capitalist level and a personal level, from running the brothel to the way he talks about the artists, to even turning Claudia, which is entirely about him, and not about her at all. He wants to live a little longer as what she sees him as ("A Black Angel" / "She thought I was an angel! Me.") and while he does love her, Armand was pretty spot-on when he called her Louis' throw pillow too.

The second is that I think Louis' an extremely punishing person. I actually lowkey love as a trait, haha, because I don't think it's one you see very often in a protagonist in, well, anything. But he does it constantly! What's fun about it to me too is that it plays as a two hander with one of Louis' best character traits, which is that he's really emotionally intelligent and capable of great compassion, so this flipside of that is that he absolutely knows how to weaponise his emotional intelligence to both get his way and to punish. He does it a lot with Lestat, from withholding his own affection and keeping Lestat in a place of insecurity in the relationship, to telling Lestat he's always going to be alone, but he does it with Daniel, Armand, Claudia and Grace too. He twists the knife on the story of Alice with Daniel, he weaponises Armand's grooming against him, fails to prioritise Claudia then tells her she's a burden, to say nothing of how he treats Grace after he feels she's rejected him (when he's really the one who initially creates distance in the aftermath of Paul's death and his turning).

I think Louis' probably going to get a little better with the latter flaw, but I don't think he's going to get better with the former at all. I think Louis' self-interest is probably going to be a facet of his character forever, and I think the demands of the next few books they're adapting are probably going to escalate that a bit, especially given I think his interest in QOTD for instance is going to be about getting Lestat back from Akasha more than it is going to be trying to save other vampires, haha.

But yeah, it's harder to tell with Lestat given we haven't heard his story yet, but his temper's important for QOTD, so I can't imagine that'll be lessened even if it does change. His withholding of information though, in theory, is about to go through a pretty significant change with the documentary, so it'll be interesting to see what they do with it!

[djuvlipen]

Hi, I remember you mentioning the importance/significance (?) of fortune telling for Romani people a while ago, would you mind elaborating on that? I thought it was more of a negative stereotype, but is it actually part.of the culture and just presented in a negative way?

Hi! Yeah, sure.

First of, I'm going to preface this by saying that this is most probably an unpopular opinion and I know some Roma would jump at my throat for saying what follows lol.

The thing with the fortune teller trope is that, from what I've seen at least, it's based on Western European depictions of Romani women. Although it has always been present in Western European literature, theater, poetry, from the 16th century onwards, two countries really perfectioned this trope during the 19th century: Germany and France. Two artistic movements that heavily relied on this trope when depicting Roma are Romanticism and Bohemanism. That doesn't mean that other Romani groups weren't stereotyped that way too, it just means that Germany and France cemented this idea of "Romani women as fortune tellers" in a way that still deeply influences modern depictions of Roma.

What I'm getting at, is that this German/French depictions of Roma makes a stereotype of the Romani groups living in these countries. The Romani group living in that region (Germany, France, Benelux) are Sinti. That's my group. And Sinti do practice tarot. I know this because my female relatives practice tarot and they learnt it from my grandma who learnt it from her mother, etc.

So, many, many Eastern European Roma will tell you that this is all just a stereotype and that no Romani person does tarot. That's a lie, it's just that this stereotype derives from Western European Romani groups, so of course Eastern European Roma don't relate. I'm from one of those Western European groups, and I can tell you that we do practice tarot, however tarot was invented in Italy. This practice didn't originate with us, it is not Romani-specific and it's not "cultural appropriation" for white people to do tarot.

However, because it was frowned upon for non-Roma to practice it (because they were supposed to be Good Christians, while the same didn't apply to Roma who were already seen as "mystical"), tarot became associated with us, because for many Romani people, who were socially and economically marginalized, tarot was a good way to make a living by playing on already established stereotypes. So that's why we came to pick up tarot. And because tarot reading started to become a skill we passed down from generation to generation, we did develop some specific practices, specific ways to read it, dos and don'ts, that you don't find in other forms of tarot reading. I can't tell you exactly what those practices are, because I personally didn't learn tarot from my mom, but from what I know about the way my female relatives practice it, it is pretty different from the usual way. So that is a personal take of mine. I know a lot of Roma would disagree with me and call me a race faker for stating this, but I don't see the point in hiding the truth: Sinti do practice tarot. And moreover, forbidding tarot reading has been a way to try and prevent Roma (and Romani women in particular) to earn a living in many European countries. So tarot has some cultural and historical relevance for Romani history, even though it didn't originate with us and it doesn't mean we are somewhat magical creatures (as I'm sure you already know haha).

Some Romani groups, especially the more religious ones, hate any kind of divination, and will frown upon anyone who does (I literally argued about this with a Romanian Romani man the other day). However, that is not my experience and as far as i know, it's not the experience of the Romani people from my group (Sinti), because we made up our own traditions and we respect them as such (usually in Sinti culture, you have to respect what you inherited from your ancestors, I constantly fight with my relatives because I think tarot is b.s and they really disagree lol). The only exception to this are the Sinti who converted to the Evangelical Christian faith and who consider tarot reading to be satanic.

So yeah, that's a personal take about my personal experience growing up in a Romani group that practices tarot, I know it's an unpopular one and that other Roma would insult me for this but I can't help it if my family history and that of the other Sinti I know don't fit into their narrative.

[pumpkinnning]

leo you didn't know what you got yourself into, baby.

for the "know your ficwriter" thingy:

2; 4; 14; 15 & 16 (that's a lot i know, hehe, but i love to hear your thoughts)

ahah joke's on you i love ranting about my writing so thank you so much for humoring me <3

2 : Do you plan each chapter or do you write as you go ? I have an outline for at least a few chapters ahead, in general, with a scene list, but those often end up changing a lot as I actually write. I've never written a story without at least a little bit of an outline though, I don't like writing if I don't know where I am going, I need that flow of energy that the story gives me, if that makes sense

4 : Where do you find inspirations for new ideas ? I don't know, everywhere ? Writer is like one of the basic modes of my brain lmao so whenever any information or experience enters one of my first reactions is like, so how can I use this in a story ? And then it's constantly running scenarios and trying to fuse ideas into each other and I think that's when my stories come together - by making interesting mixes of stuff. Like a recipe or a potion lmao. There are a few big themes that come back constantly - like awe for big scary overwhelming forces of nature, loneliness, trauma, the sacred, the horrors and wonders of having a body, power, freedom, devotion, etc - and then I'm just looking for more specific lenses to explore them through. I honestly think if you're paying attention you can find ideas absolutely anywhere. That said when I'm blocked or my writing feels stale I love reading a good book or watching a cool movie because that regenerates my belief in the power of good storytelling. Or going somewhere I've never been to before.

14: how do you write emotional scenes ? Do you ever feel what the characters feel ? Do you draw from personal experiences ? Tbh for me all scenes are emotional, if there's no emotions it feels dead and there's no point in writing it. And yeah I'm very method with my writing, I need to feel it to be inspired - generally it's an enjoyable process, even for negative stuff it's cathartic. And yes, I draw a lot from personal experiences, not directly but transformed and amplified - writing is in general very therapeutic for me, even though I try to not go too far with that because it doesn't always make for the most interesting stuff to read haha.

15: How do you write smut scenes ? Do you get very visual or detailed ? How important is it to be realistic ? To me smut is a great way to get into the mindset and emotions of characters and peeling back some layers, so that's the most important thing to figure out - although sometimes it's just yeah that would be hot, does it fit the Theme lmfao. In real life it's silly to assign arbitrary meanings to particular acts but in a story it's very interesting to figure out what it symbolizes. I like writing kinky stuff as well because it makes that more explicit. In terms of details - no, not really, because honestly I think if a character's POV gets too fixated on details it means they're probably too in their heads and not really enjoying the experience so it can quickly feel artificial. I think the key is about picking the right details. But also it's just HARD to find words to describe that kind of stuff without sounding corny lmao. As for the realism, hm, as long as you can understand what everybody is doing and there's no weird impossible anatomy going on, I'm not THAT hung up on it, it's meant to be a fantasy anyway - but the best smut does tend to have some realistic moments at least because it's more human and interesting and sexy if it's not just acting out a perfect boring choreography.

16: how many fic ideas are you nurturing right now ? share one of them ? I have a shit ton of ideas but I am trying to be disciplined and not start anything until I have finished sanctuary. (except maybe a few short one shots like my solarpunk wizards AU). All sebchal for now. One I have been thinking about a lot is an absolutely insane multiverse thing with several seemingly unrelated stories that get framed in several different ways - one that happens in a decaying post apocalyptic seaside town ruled by the mob with haunted old hollywood vibes/romeo + juliet/also with illegal car racing and a bad ending ; one where Seb is a cult leader ; one where they're both women in a cyberpunk crap future where Seb is a bounty hunter and Charles is an escort and they end up teaming up against the kingpin that wants to make their lives miserable and then they leave town together ; anyway a few others i'm not sure if i'm ever going to get to it because it would be enormous but it's very fun to think about. also i really want to write a BDSM focused fic at some point. and maaaaaaybe a sanctuary sequel.

[miss-nymphetamine]

hiya! rando who has been following the arcana stuff for a while here!

im not sure how long exactly you’ve been away, but if you hadn’t heard: tldr is the game was bought by a new company and this company has made things an absolute shitshow

the company behind the arcana, nix hydra, was bought by another developer company, dorian, several months back. and because of that, new arcana content is being added to their dorian app instead of the original. oh yea, and i believe only a few original arcana team members have stayed during the acquisition (one writer and the artist are all im aware of)

there’s also new original tales coming out for each love interest, we’ve gotten them once a week for the past couple of weeks. so far we’ve gotten asra and nadia with julian on the way, but both of the first two were met with very negative reviews (i have to agree, they feel very soulless and unaware of their character beyond the very baseline tropes and archetypes)

the general attitude of impending doom probably stems from these things if i had to guess lmao. the new company has stumbled every step of the way and the fandom at large i think has grown tired of letting things slide

(sorry for the long message haha i just wanted to make sure as much of the story was here as possible!)

No, Anon, long messages don't bother me. Thank you for the explanation. I've been away for months now, I'd say almost a year, and never expected this. Not that I am willing to return if the situation is that dire. It's a pity when something's going well enough and all of a sudden it ceases to be because some new folks don't understand -or don't want to- how that particular something works and dismiss the fandom's general feelings in a game that was this closely related to said fandom.

We'll always have the fics, at least.

Thanks!

[bunboof]

2 August 2023

So the past 4 days, seems like Sarang has been more calm or maybe the neighborhood is just a bit quieter. He has been going to bed by himself, without any interruptions it seems at around the designated bedtime of 10 pm. I think he has now decompressed from the last over threshold incidents. I've been taking him to open areas with a long lead. Surprisingly he seems to really like them. & now when I hold the leash I see him do a little twirl jump at the start, accompanied by a bark or two (I still am trying to distinguish if its more like a whimper bark (because I am going somewhere, or because he doesn't want to go out) or excited...). Every time I put the lead on though, he is keen to go out the door....

We have been doing a mix of the exercises we learned during the class at home, outside the driveway and outdoors as well. He isn't too bad with the recall with the long lead. I noticed he is more alert and more reactive to people when it's dark but yesterday he was doing pretty good and he did stare at people but I was able to get his attention back to me and reward him. He wasn't responsive to my voice when unknown things appear, so I used the clicker...a lot haha. When unknown things appear I try to say what they are each time they appear. For example when people appear, I say 'people', another person appears, 'people', a car appears, 'car', bird appears, 'bird'. I also try to combine this with the sign language for these words to when he is looking my way.

During this time, I also changed his leash to a longer 2 m leash and we also purchased the long lead (10 m and 5 m) for the outdoor sessions. I think using the 2 m leash is a lot better so far, maybe it was my own lack of confidence / worry and not knowing much about the negatives of a short lead with his specific situation.

There was a dog that appeared from afar, probably at least 50 meters, he saw it before I did behind a bush. He still lunged multiple times but no barking and I was able to get him to turn around a bit faster than before I think.

Another change, is that since July 27 I have slowly been transitioning him to raw food. I am not sure if this has played a part but it is something I am working on transitioning his diet to.

Today he came in for his second session with the trainer. He was a lot less nervous than the first session which was good and he showed that he was a little bit more comfortable. Surprisingly when we learning about loose leash walking, he did really well and he even made eye contact / checked in with me. I started to practice loose leash walking for the past couple of weeks, not heavily but just a bit but he rarely made eye contact with me until today at the class.

[kimtaegis]

I listened to the remixes today! Most of them were fine, it was nice listening to them but nothing extra. (I feel like I sound like a hater sorry😭) I really liked the acoustic version though! His voice paired with the guitar sounded sooo good 🥹 I don't know why they chose to process his voice so much in the original song since he sounds great without it too, hence the acoustic version. I'm relieved that I finally like it because while I was okay with not liking this album as much as I did FACE, it made me sad that I didn't like it but now I have the acoustic version. 🫂

I watched the Fallon performance too and I loved it! I guess it would be a live version since I can't really compare it to any of the remixes and it definitely sound better (to me) than the original one. It was amazing! The dance was fantastic, I liked the fixed-but-not-really camera positions they did, he sounded amazing and his dancers were great too! I'm not sure if anyone else feels this way but I love it when you can hear them breathe while they sing live. Idk why but it just makes the performance realer to me? So when are we getting this version? :D

My favorite remix was the rock one!! It was amazing and I understand why everyone keeps begging bts to do a rock album :D I loved fake love's rocking vibe mix too.

I'm really happy for everyone who likes the album! I wish more people would be open to negative(-ish?) opinions, because not all of them come from a bad place. Me saying I didn't like the album as much and that Who's autotune ruined the song for me is simply an opinion but I have no intention bashing Jimin or the crew who worked on the song 🤷‍♀️ The day kpop fans finally learn that people have different tastes and opinions is the day the world will finally heal..

I've been listening to the album on and off since it came out and I definitely like it a bit better since Friday. Rebirth grew on me a lot! I'm still a bit neutral about Slow Dance. Be Mine really is a bop, it will probably stay as my favorite from the album :) Well, until the acoustic and rock remix take the no.1 spot :D

Well, I would say FACE will still be my no1 Jimin album (for now), but I do like MUSE better after a few days. It will be hard to top FACE for me, I mean Alone is my favourite song of all time and it beat out songs like Mikrokosmos, TTU and Tear which held the spot for years :D But I truly am happy for him and I'm glad many people are liking the album 🫂 and he's crazy for all the records he was breaking with just one version.. not to get into talking about charts but now I'm really curious just what is he gonna achieve with multiple versions.. and sorry for the long ask again :D

sooooo happy to hear you enjoy the remixes and the live performance more, bye bye autotune for youuuu 😍😍😍 I think the performance adds a lot of flavour to the whole song, I loved it too, the location and the way it was filmed was so cool. someone pointed out earlier under one of my sets that they’ve used lots of space for the choreo so the formations just look super dope with the men and women groups, it reminds me of musicals somehow? and I totally get what you mean by the breathing in the mic!! like yes, that’s a human doing this, not some machine, it adds so much character.

it’s sweet that you keep coming back to the album even though you don’t have to. sometimes you really have to sit with something for a bit you know, let it marinate. and sometimes the time is also just not the best and you have to come back to it when you’re in the right mindset for it (indigo is my example for this). but again, it’s also alright that it probably won’t be your favourite for good. according to the bts and jimin songs you mentioned you loved, the tracks on MUSE are really just not your type (see, I’m more of an upbeat girlie, Alone is one of my least favourites from jimin so far haha). as you said, FACE and all those other songs will never not be there for you so it’s all good! and lastly I wanna say I really appreciate your attitude and the way you went around expressing your criticism, I also wish there would me more fans that’d be able to do it that way 🤍

[meowmeowbeepy]

Wow here are some updates no one asked for

I just caught up on previous blog posts. I am sorry the last two seemed more like tweets. Here are some historical happenings since last true post (mostly I've been doing book and podcast reviews lol?)

I went to NY w/ Benny which was fun. I was so incredibly pleased w/ myself that he actually LIKED it. Lots of touristy things that we all must do at least once in this life... Next time we go back we will be more slow paced. I liked the hotel A LOT. It's great to stay in 1 central place when traveling. I know I'll have made it in life if my future hotels on vacations are nice as balls and convenient and no compromise! He liked the MET the most. I felt bad bc I was not doing well that day (abrupt #3 iykyk and hungry and feet hurt). Something I like abt Ben: he never makes me feel bad when I actually am being a problem. I cannot say I am as gracious towards crankypants. I liked the ferry ride to the Statue of Liberty! Specifically the Statue of Liberty. The island was not crowded, and we were the first group there so it was an ideal situation and felt whimsical for an iconic landmark. I also really liked seeing friends Clur and Corn. It was so nice and energetic for the limited time I had. But the most soul filling ofc was bringing Benny to grandparents. I appreciate my auntie sm for being the best (albeit crazy) caretaker of grandparents (also crazy). Family becomes everything and continues to speed up up up up in importance as we age. Our social worlds will get smaller.. not worse! Just infrequent! But family is home. That's how I can describe the feeling anyways. My translation abilities were better than I thought... Also, I knew they were old but I never felt they were any older than other grandparents. But after this trip, I could SEE and I really felt that they are getting far older than average/normal. So I treasure and am thankful for that. I hope they will be here for much longer. So much time has gone by since I was a little college kid staying majorly w/ them "upstate" and venturing towards Manhattan. Now, I don't think I could do that haha. I am such a princess haha.

Before we went to NY me, daddy, and Benny went to a Rockets game. It was perfectly fun and something I know my daddy will treasure a lot. He likes that kinda stuff.

I thought December was going to be a huge flop/slow month for HAs but it ended up being ok. January tho... extreme flop lols. But I guess I have one more week to turn it around? Doubt I can realistically. I wonder if I am not as motivated as I was when I first started :( But idunno. I think about the ethics and morals of different HA levels way more than I used to? Or at least deeper than I used to so maybe that is affecting me? I also think I am more realistic than before- I used to give my 500% and was blind to a person who probably wouldn't follow through. Now, I can see it early on and it doesn't disappoint as much I guess. Probably not good. Also, the salary drama I've recently become privy to was a weird thing to experience in my career. I didn't get TMJ from it lol and feel pretty neutral overall. But hoping the best... for all.. and for me. If I could say 1 thing I am really bleh to: the tracking and KPI of my office. The higher ups are VERY nice... but what's going to happen when my numbers aren't as good for an entire year as maybe they were Sept-Oct. But I won't be too negative, realistically I know things will ebb and flow without any change in me.

Ok last one. We got a new doggy! Born 3/21/2020... Barney! He's so sweetums and so much more DOG than Toby was. Barney is just a wee bit mischievous but it is overpowered by his loyalty and desire to be close to humans. Toby was very mischievous and not super affectionate or needy, tho very loyal w/out shame lol. (Ex. does not want love from anyone but my mom.. esp Joann) Barney is pretty sweet to all. Joann has announced that he is HER dog, which makes sense. AND I don't mind. I just want a little doggy adjacent. She is basically holding him hostage in her room which I think is funny bc his personality probably will do well w/ that. Vs. Toby hated her for that. God blessed us w/ Barney though. He is so gentle and baby that he will be a good second dog to people who VERY HONESTLY have not fully moved on from Toby. And probably never will (not in a super bad way) but he was more than a dog lollll so dramatic.

K bye

[darkwithasharpenededge]

A Disappointed Review of Star Wars: Visions: Ronin by Emma Mieko Candon

Rating: 47/100

Summary: I really hesitated to review this book at first, especially because I didn't like it. I've read some of the Goodread reviews, which are negative for a variety of unfair reasons (most notably the use of they/them pronouns for a character, which I didn't find to be nearly as confusing as some people sure thought it was), and I hesitated to add another criticism to the pile, but I did set a goal of reviewing (almost) everything I read in 2024, and so this book too must receive a review.

This Book Was Poorly Served By Being A Licensed Star Wars Novel

My main takeaway is that the author would have been better off with an original fantasy setting of her own. One of my main issues with the book was that it seems to alter the way the Force works in Star Wars, but then it never explains those alterations to the reader at any point during the story. An entirely original setting that forced the author to actually explain her magic system probably would have served the story better than trying to twist Star Wars' existing (and extremely well known by anyone curious enough to pick up a tie-in novel) magic into something more original.

I was interested in the alternate concept and view of the Jedi and Sith, but these organizations seemed like Jedi and Sith in name only. I might even go as far as to accuse the author of having played too much KOTOR and letting it warp her perception of both organizations, and that's coming from a die-hard "KOTOR is the best Star Wars story ever told" girl who's veryyyyyy Jedi-critical. I could have liked this book. I wanted to like this book. But it just didn't feel like Star Wars to me, for reasons unrelated to its exploration of an alternative timeline.

The Ending: The ending lowkey sucked. I didn't see it coming at ALL, and it was the kind of thing I really would have preferred to see coming. I like to feel smart, let me figure it all out at least a few pages before the characters do haha. Not that there was anything to figure out, because the ending actually didn't make much sense. I found myself very unfulfilled. I suppose the whole story was like that, that wasn't just a problem with the ending.

Characters: None of the characters are really truly gripping. Star Wars fiction works best with a strong core cast, people I can root for (or not root for) and none of these characters are really it. Even the (various) betrayals didn't get a reaction from me, since I truly did not care that much about any of the characters.

Final Verdict: I feel bad about this, especially because I'm about to give a probably worse book a higher rating, but the only reason I even finished this book was because it was my last read of the year and I wanted just one more to improve my 2024 stats.

Review Word Count: 506

[clanoffelidae]

bleh

trying to tell myself that this is the heaviest time of year at work, im very much still recovering from covid, im still hurt by what happened back in early december and having difficulty re-engaging with previous past times because of the associations, and am also currently trying to help a disabled friend get out of his abusive home, find a doctor who can help him, and figure out how he can sustain himself financially long-term in a way that won't make everything worse in the long run by exceeding his limitations; so it's okay that i'm not doing a whole lot of 'fun' things or being super productive, i don't have to be to begin with, but i'm still feeling pretty down at times

i think by and large i'm mostly lonely; while i see people every day at work we're all stressed to hell and back, i retreated from several social circles when the whole deal went down in early december because it was all just constant reminders of what was hurting me (which was absolutely the right call, but the end result was also that, well, now i don't talk to as many people any more :/), and hit me so bad that i really should have gone to the hospital so i've just been too tired to socialize with people both irl and online but unfortunately human brains are stupid and still demand a level of socializing and make you feel bad when you don't get it even when putting in the effort to get it would cause greater overall suffering due to physical and mental stress (i've had like maybe half a spoon since i started feeling really sick around december 22nd-23rd)

i dunno, just externalizing it, if you happen to read this it's probably cause you follow me and so by now you are probably well aware that i do that a lot lol

idk writing in a journal or personal notepad doesn't really help as much, i try to bury these types of posts a lot by not tagging them and putting them under readmores in the hopes that they'll go largely unnoticed, but i need the façade of putting it out there and making it 'public' or else it still circles to an extent; i have to at least be able to pretend i'm saying it to other people to get it out best and unfortunately i haven't been able to cognitive dissonance myself well enough for truly private rambles to help

so like i dunno, if you're reading this don't feel like this is a cry for help or really saying anything, i'm just trying to process how i feel and externalize it in the hopes the bad vibes will ease up a bit

and what sucks even more is that now i feel the need to say that haha; because what hurt me so bad back in december was that two instances of me just posting things on my blog to externalize them, untagged (tagged with commentary but not tagged to be searchable) and hidden under readmores that were just me trying to get negative feelings out in as privately a way as i could while still saying them 'publicly' because my brain is stupid and needs to at least be able to pretend it's being said to other people, were taken and used to call me immature and untrustworthy, i was given no chance to defend myself or even ask questions until i went and tracked someone else down to ask if i could ask questions, no one ever reached out to me and asked about the posts before going ahead and leveling accusations at me (and i know the posts had to go through at least four people's hands and two levels of hierarchy), not once did anyone try to inquire about these non-specific and untagged posts to see if they had the story right, and while during the subsequent conversation one of them was cleared up and apologized for (which i greatly appreciate!) not a single thing was said about the other and the second post had been me venting irrational anxieties about encountering a specific individual who had previously hurt me and when i requested that they (people who used that post to accuse me) not do that to someone again as far as i can tell i was pretty much just brushed off

like if just one person had messaged me and said they were concerned about the posts or wanted to talk to me about them i would've been happy to clear things up right there on the spot

and now i can't even make an anonymous post on my anonymous tumblr blog about the fact that i'm feeling a little down without feeling the need to defend myself for doing so because the last time i did this it was -gestures irritably and exhaustedly to text wall above-

just sucks y'all, idk

at every possible point in that situation i tried to communicate with people when it was clear there was something to communicate about, beyond that i was just externalizing feelings and attempting to make sure they were out of the way and not bothering anyone, you don't get to come in here and demand that i should have taken my vent post about completely irrational anxieties relating to an individual who has harmed me previously to you, complete strangers, instead of just non-specifically venting it and burying it because it's irrational worry and i knew that and was just trying to get it out of my head; especially when you never tried to communicate your concerns to me, as far as i knew we had resolved everything because everything had been cleared up and everyone said it was fine, the sheer hypocrisy and audacity of demanding that i bring my personal trauma and anxiety to complete fucking strangers when said strangers couldn't even be bothered to send me a single damn message related to their own concerns after, again, we had seemingly cleared everything up and everything had been smoothed over because clarifications were made and everyone said it was cool, and then i got taken by complete surprise and felt the damn floor fall away from me after an hour or two once it fully sunk in that the fucking intrusive thoughts i was trying to cope with were used as a weapon against me

like fucking thanks they were already causing me enough difficulty on their own, didn't know they could be weaponized even further, now i know i guess

'but how could anyone have known that-?' maybe if they'd fucking asked me, at literally any point, instead of taking non-specific words from a complete stranger that were not directed at anyone and deciding what they meant in their own heads

but to do a complete tonal whiplash as is my specialty i am well and truly still upset about that and still working on it (emotional processing and recovery was halted by a blast door upon contracting covid wherein i transitioned from fighting a painful emotional situation to fighting for my damn life lol), slowly picking up steam again on working through it and dragging things up back out from where they got hurriedly buried because i had other priorities like trying to continue breathing to sort through them, but as awful as it was the statements of 'i hate that this happened and am extremely hurt by it and am still processing it' and 'if this situation hadn't happened i could've well died or at the very least wound up on a ventilator and with severe lung and probably heart damage from covid so i am simultaneously extremely grateful it happened because i love living and being alive' are not mutually exclusive <3

'lynx what the FUCK do you mean it stopped you from dying or at the very least ending up on a ventilator from covid'

part of the reason the situation was so hard on me was that i had inadvertently entered withdrawal from my adhd meds, an amphetamine, and the situation resulted in that withdrawal going on for much longer than it should have (and may have sort of been the reason it started because i wound up staying up late because i was so excited due to stuff related to the situation before it went to shit and as a result overslept and missed my meds for 2 days in a row and thus started me into withdrawal); it left me struggling to stand and trembling and with a persistent headache and too weak to do much other than stumble to the kitchen for 2 minutes and then stumble back to bed

what this means: i was in severe physical distress due to amphetamine withdrawal BUT i also built up an extra stockpile of the meds i failed to take

i shortly after went up to a higher dose of my meds

i barely had enough to get me through covid

if all of this hadn't happened i would have gone into amphetamine withdrawal from an even HIGHER dose of a medication which left me struggling to stand, extremely weak, and in pain when i went into withdrawal the first time; while being sick with covid that got so severe already that i could feel stuff rattling in my chest with every breath that i was too weak to cough out, i was unable to do more than take extremely shallow breaths because the lower parts of my lungs were gummed up, and i was having to breathe at about 35-40 breaths a minute while lying down resting because if i tried to slow or deepen my breathing at all i would become dizzy from oxygen deprivation

yeah anyway the situation sucks and im still very much working on the emotional hardship it caused and figuring out what to do but on the other hand i am simultaneously extraordinarily grateful for it because whatever benevolent but chaotic entity sets up the rube goldberg machine that is my life (this is NOT the first time something like this has happened, another good example im not going to get into the details of rn is 2 months of extremely painful ear infections saved me from a therapy bill) made sure i wouldn't die or at the very least end up on a ventilator with severe lung and probably heart damage from covid 👍

and ive got that other stuff going on like i mentioned at the beginning but that's way too much an on-going thing for me to have more thoughts than 'hnnng why can't i just kidnap friend' F lol

just venting and then felt it apt to ensure the tonal whiplash of my life hits as many people as possible because if you started reading that upset vent you gotta know what happened a few weeks later because buddy. ah.

anyway living and being alive is great, i have seen the face of death before and while it has left me a much wiser and more peaceful person in the aftermath (honestly i know it doesn't seem like it from my vent posts but that's because i have chronic can't shut up disease but at the end of it all i really only give a shit because i know that what happens to me can happen to others, if this had been something like 'yeah i got attacked by a rabid dog but it was euthanized and im getting treatment for it 's all good' you would've heard way less about it lol, it's because this is a kind of situation that ripples if that makes sense?) i really was laying there christmas night realizing the probability of me not waking up again (which is never 0) had increased by a worryingly large percentage and looking at death who was vibing on top of my chest and making it hard to breathe like '... i'm going to sleep and you better piss off while i'm in dreamland'

(not literally i mean this in a metaphorical sense)

at this rate i'm gonna have to start asking how the kids are lol

mfer's quiet tho like damn okay i'm not worth a reply i'll just go fuck myself then lol

(again, still being metaphorical here; it's one of those things where if you don't get it just let it go and if you get it you get it and also i'm so sorry do you want to talk /srs)

[pulpypunk]

TPP spoilers kinda. Throwin thoughts around, encouraging comments.

I have such incredibly high hopes for Sasha Wire as an antagonist. She is my favorite so far in the podcast. I'd like to hear more on her reasoning of Dark Matters being the Best Route and if she'll actually make her own redemption by making Dark Matters better, but that seems highly unlikely. What's probably gonna happen is it's gonna tie in with S2s cybernetics. Dark Matters adding cybernetics to criminals perhaps? Perhaps ones with great fame and skill, that one could make an example out of? Haha. Wouldn't that be weird.

Anyways, focusing on Sasha. Her motivation is stellar and has been set in place for a long time. Annie, leaving the HCPD, likely even Juno's departure for them as well. The smart ones get off of Hyperion. The smart ones leave Mars because they know they can't fix Hyperion from the inside. I wholeheartedly believe she still has her attachments to home and wants to improve it. That her motivations line up with S1 and S2 Juno, and her deal with the devil is seen as a necessity. We have to circle back to Newtown to see exactly what she's done there however. Did she help? Did Dark Matters have any play with Ramses? They were watching the Miasma fiasco, so is this Illuminati bullshit tied in everywhere?

It's interesting to compare how her and Nureyev's minds have a bit of similarity. Pull a string here. Organized. Plan upon plan and believing they can manipulate anyone in the room. Probably boxing anything worthwhile when required (like a conscience). I'm sure someone's probably said this somewhere, but Sasha's and Peter's mirroring in thought process is. Hhh. They both want to be unknown and nameless.

We know that Nureyev's reasoning to hide his true name, true face, true nature, whatever, is from guilt and need under a cloak practicality. No, of course he doesn't feel bad about Brahma, about Mag, about Slip, and doesn't struggle with letting anyone in to see what he's done. It's simply that the things he's done are too big to handle, too big to tell anyone, too risky, right? Nah. He 100% could've and should've told the family what he did with the Guardian Angel. Any scrap of truth, especially telling them that he was a young revolutionary doing the right thing? It would've struck their hearts. Jet hating the weapon, Buddy and Vespa hating the suppression, it's severely unlikely they would've taken his past in a negative light, at least for long. But he didn't because he didn't want to be known. The guilt is too great.

So, rounding back to Sasha, does any of this apply to her? Has she done something horrifying while we weren't looking and is now attempting to wipe everyone who's known her in a way to escape her guilt? Or is this practicality? I've heard some people talking about Mick and how he's likely in danger, but I doubt it, since he doesn't know what she's been doing recently and holds no grudges on her. No guilt for her there then.

Juno is dealing with two people dear to him that are very self focused, very driven, that he KNOWS have good centers, and yet what are they doing? Part of his family, hurting his family, one way or another. I wonder if his forgiveness of one, or lack thereof, will impact the other.

Sasha is boned after almost hurting Rita tho. And the final nail must be putting everyone else in Brainwash Jail. So, yeah, might not be a mirror, anywhere near comparable forgiveness wise, unless Nureyev has some pretty bad skeletons. I'd really like to see a Sasha redemption arc on principle, but I won't get my hopes up on that.

[semperama]

Omg you’re doing the artists way I’ve thought abt it for so long but haven’t done it, how have you liked it/what’s it been like??

I'm only in the first week, so I guess my feelings could change, but so far I LOVE it. I love it so much. It might as well have been written just for me and what I need and where I am in my ~artistic journey, because it's speaking to me in such a deep and necessary way.

I will say, if you aren't willing to accept the spiritual component of it, it might not resonate as much with you. You don't have to believe in God or a god, per se, but I think you do have to be willing to believe that there is some kind of universal creative force or collective creative unconsciousness, or at least suspend disbelief enough to buy into that part of it. It reminds me a little of AA or NA--you might not have to believe in a higher power, but you do have to be able to submit yourself to the idea that there's something bigger or higher than you at play. That aspect is actually so helpful to me though, because a lot of my creative block comes from being too self-conscious and/or self-absorbed, and thinking of myself as more of a vessel for some outside creative energy is so helpful to me in terms of getting me out of my head. A lot of what I've read so far reminds me a lot of this TedTalk by Elizabeth Gilbert, which I listen to like once a quarter because it's so, so good and helpful and smart.

That said, the author does say that even if you just do the exercises without fully believing all the other stuff, it will still be helpful, and I could see how that would be true. For example, Week 1 has been about getting rid of fear, and it's all about figuring out the negative beliefs you have about your art and turning them into affirmations instead. That's obviously something you can do without getting too spiritual with it, haha. And I've learned a lot about myself just thinking about my past and the things people have said or done that have made me afraid to create. It's very...healing. I know that sounds probably hyperbolic and ridiculous, but I've been feeling so down about my writing in the past couple years, and the tone of the book really is incredibly gentle and supportive and healing.

Anyway, like I said, my feelings could still change since I'm still right at the beginning, but so far I honestly want to recommend it to every writer/artist I know!!

[ben-101-rewrite]

May you tell us how Zombozo and the Circus Freaks work in this rewrite? Like, what's their dynamic and what plots do they play a part in?

They'd still mostly play their parts as minor villains, popping up throughout the show. Though I imagine that by Omnitrix, they don't appear as much, or at the very least don't fight Ben anymore, as a showcase how far Ben has come from those roadtrip days. However, I did make a rewrite note on the Negative 10, and Zombozo is gonna be a part of that, instead of his Circus Freak minions. I feel like he plays more into one of the bigger bads, that wasn't Zs'skayr or Vilgax, that better represented one of Ben's struggling points in the series, to make what the Negative 10 is suppose to be about. Though when it comes to Zombozo himself, I'm still trying to figure out his origins, and how he got his powers. For the Circus Freaks, I'm going with the mutant route, but Zombozo always seemed like he was something more than that, which makes him more scarier to deal with. But figuring out his powers has been admittedly hard haha. The three concepts I have so far are, first one being, magic. I'm not going with him being from Ledgerdomain, since I've already done enough there for now, and I don't want all magic to be Ledgerdomain stuff. I think my concept is some people on earth, with access to magic, accidently made Zombozo and now he's a loose threat. Second concept, is perhaps alien stuff, maybe him being related to an alien species, or is an alien under disguise. Though this concept is rather loose and weak. The third option, which I might end up going with, is that it's never explained. You get hints or suggestions based on comments, or background clues. But at the end of the day, whatever Zombozo is, Ben doesn't know. And it's fun to leave things unexplained with certain concepts, and I feel Zombozo works well enough there. As for the Circus Freaks, I mentioned I was gonna keep them as mutants, to help add to the idea that this earth is still strange, even without the alien stuff. I imagine each member was found one by one by Zombozo, and took advantage of them since they had no where else to go. Mutant are, of course, not seen in a bright light among humans. When it comes to their dynamics. I do really like the idea of Frightwig and Thumbskull being a thing (Height difference ships are always adorable lol), so I imagine you see some sweet interactions between them. Acid Breath acts more like the leader compared to the three, and while he is grumpy and say nasty things, he most likely does want to keep his team safe, as they're all he really has. Zombozo though, he scares them all. They do not want to disappoint him, and the way he speaks towards them is creepy, condescending, and also threatening. And if I go with the mysterious background with the dude, then that would very much play into it more. Eventually the Circus Freak would leave him behind, because they don't wanna mess with that anymore, and they probably just do simple criminal stuff, instead of helping Zombozo steal the souls of people. They may be villains, but they never liked what their boss did to people.