#probably good for them to get away from me lol since apparently im stressful to be around
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flaphack · 11 months ago
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louthingg · 7 months ago
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well now i absolutely Must know about horse body language. tell me everything
OMG OKAYAYAJAHHA !!!!! so for context horses have been a special interest if mine since i was like ,,, 6 years old. im a teenager so in short: its been a long time and i know a lot :3 im secretly a horse girl in the body of a guy. ill go through different emotions or feelings and tell you how to read them in horses:
fear or nerves: this one is perhaps the easiest. horses who are spooked will typically freeze before bolting or rearing. not only will they freeze, but they will lift their head up much higher than normal and their ears will prick forward. so in short, they will feel and look very tense and alert. afterwards they will typically breathe heavily, shake their head ( a common sign of stress—kind of like how we might fidget if we’re nervous ) and the whites of their eyes might show. for nerves specifically they will lick, chew apparently nothing, blink excessivly and / or ( like with fear ) shake their head.
relaxation: when a horse is relaxed, their head will go down and normally tense muscles will become seemingly soft—especially the poll of their neck. the poll is the place right behind their ears and reaches about a quarter of the way down their neck. this part of their body will usually be very tight and will even feel solid if their tense enouhg. if you look at the professional dressage ( and even jumping ) horses, youll notice that their heads are kind of tucked into their chests when theyre being ridden. this is good. it means that theyre accepting contact with the bit and are relaxed.
happiness: this is a tricky one. its different for almost all horses, but the most common signs are: ears forward or to the side, gentle snorting ( both adrenaline AND dopamine make them do this lol ), and ( if theyre excited ) bouncing their head up and down.
pain or discomfort: this is fortunately pretty easy to recognize and the signs include excessive pacing, excessive licking and / or chewing, head shaking. its pretty similar to other forms of stress like nerves or fear.
anger: this is perhaps the most widely known emotion people know how to read, because its ,,, very clear. if a horses ears are pinned flat against their head, theyre backing up or the whites of their eyes are showing, chances are theyre really mad or just pissed in general and you probably wanna get away from them unless youre experienced enough to deal with it.
as you can probably guess, a lot of the signs for emotions are similar, so it might seem difficult to read them at first, but honestly, its all about reading the context of the situation. for example: if a horse is doing a thing theyre good at and they start bouncing their head it’s probably a sign that theyre excited and not that theyre nervous. if a horse is snorting after a good run on a course, its probably cos theyre pleased with themselves. so on and so forth.
ANYWAY thats about it i love horses so so much ughfhgfhf its kinda insane but ill actually talk about them all day :3 hope you enjoyed !!
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mindself · 4 months ago
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Mind did not want to focus. Super tired even tho i slept like 7 hrs or more (felt like i didnt sleep that grear tho-- light sleeping rather than good rest) Didn't feel like waking up but my mind started waking up. So i might as well have gotten up. I don't have to go anywhere today. I should get some things done. But i think my mind is just tired from not resting last weekend. I did rest.... but not enough apparently. Driving wears me out no matter what else i do, even tho I've been driving for over 20 years. I think irregular schedule wears me out too, along with getting up in the morning even tho it's not that early and driving right away. Also if i have to go somewhere in the morning i often wake up earlier than i need to bc my mind is telling me i have to get up in the morning! Not that early tho! If i don't get 8 hours of sleep my mind is not at optimum which i hate. 7 is ok but not enough and gradually adds up negatively. And if i slept weird like waking up a lot it's even worse than not getting those hours at all. Plus it's even harder to get up now with sleeping pills and forcing myself to wake up even with coffee is draining (rather than easing into the day by 11 when my mind begins to work.... I used to be a morning person before my arm injury messed up my sleep schedule!!!). Perhaps trying to figure out things and not having them figured out for 15 years is also stressful-- and pressure building yearly ... even more this y bc i have to move out by October lol... And stress is stressful like i was driving in a storm last weekend and car went thru a puddle and stalled. Panicked. This happened last year and car battery died amd i had to get it towed. And im terrrified of car accidents... even more bc my car insurance shot up this y after scraping another car just a little in a parking lot... over $100 just to tow the car last year for a block and find nothing wrong w it.... It takes me a long time to recover from any kind of stress (why i avoid people... interaction takes too much out of me and i lose time and panic and have to rest)
I also have a slight headache today. And have vacation next week so im probably like why work just today. My sister is coming tomorrow and if im not rested i might do sth i regret. Need to charge energy for being with people (even tho i like my sister it all adds up) -- including a baby shower for my cousin on Sunday-- and driving on Saturday like 23 miles... packing.... switching gears...
May be from last weekend/needing to rest... maybe i am sick tho bc i haven't felt normal for a while. A sort of brain fog. This morning i heard my bagel pop up in the toaster and i . Opened the microwave. Brain glitches like that plus spacing out and not remembering things. Hard to think.
Maybe its built up stress since i can't handle trying to figure things out/pressure of not having it figured out yet. Why. Why can't i handke actual normal things
Maybe i need a vacation (but i need a vacation like. Every other week if the week + weekend is full .. Can't get anything done like that!!!). Maybe something is seriously wrong w me.
I was going to look up things on my phone this morning but as usual i checked my tumblr but this time i totally forgot what i was doing and was scrolling tumblr for a while without realizing it. Like i needed to actually do something (or SHOULD). I even forgot i needed to take a shower this morning. Suddenly i remembered. Well if I'm not getting anything else done i might as well take a shower...
Then i went to get dressed but even got diverted from that lol and started rearrranging the magnets on the magnet board on my dresser (one of those calendar ones-- mom gave me it for organizing but i just used it for magnets and putting cards, pictures etc on).
Maybe my mind is telling me i need to take a break. The one day i dont neeed to do anything. Even tho i SHOULDNT NEED TO TAKE A BREAK AFTER SO LITTLE
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kcatta-wodahs · 4 years ago
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MC Who Does Not Fear Death x OM! Demon Brothers
Or maiming, or apparently any other consequences. You’ve walked into this situation with absolutely no filter and no fear. Time to tear down every structure of Devildom society.
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Lucifer
You look at him with a withering stare when he tries to intimidate you into behaving.
“I was summoned out of my trashy apartment to this place, where literally anyone could snap me like a twig on accident. I’m just working on the assumption that I’m already dead.”
He sternly looks at you. “You’re under my protection during your time here. No harm will come to you.”
You snort derisively, which visibly irritates him. “Don’t worry about it. I won’t come back to haunt you if it happens.”
As you continue through your life in Devildom he keeps calling you out for meddling and all that, like usual, and he HATES that you literally *do not care* when he threatens you.
Like HE knows that he wouldn’t hurt Diavolo’s transfer student but YOU are supposed to be AFRAID of him dammit.
His frustration at this ends up turning into a form of respect. You’re about the only person who will stand up to him, and tbh like you’re so fucking fragile but you’ll yell at him all day? That takes guts. Annoying guts. But you’ve got guts.
But also STOP IT. He has enough stress in his life and now he’s constantly terrified that you’ve decided it’s a great idea to adopt a baby balrog
Which you did once. He’s just afraid that “Flamin Hot Cheeto” is going to come back since you somehow managed to imprint on it.
despite the fact that the BABY could easily tear your arms off on accident
Not to mention he gets the flack for EVERY SINGLE ONE of these following stories. You stress him out so much. Please. Please, stop. 
He’s almost to the point of begging. The Avatar of Pride is three steps away from either locking you away for the rest of the year or begging on his knees for you to calm down. 
 But you know you’d find a way out if he locked you up so no worries. It’ll be a good challenge.
Mammon
“Well you WON’T be dead because it’s my job to protect you! Are you doubting the Great Mammon?!”
Stupid human. Yeah, you’re fragile and weak, but that’s why HE’S your bodyguard now, and there’s no way in hell (lol) that he would let you die on his watch.
Lucifer would kill him.
You welcome the challenge, and he thinks it’s funny at first but quickly becomes a flustered mother hen.
“NO, we are NOT going out to Madam Scream’s at 3am! Do ya know what kinda CREEPS are out there at 3am?!”
And you sneak out the fucking window.
He has had more heart attacks in the past week than he has had in the last 100 years of life.
He starts agreeing to your ridiculous adventures JUST because then he can actually keep an eye on you. 
He adores the chaos of the laugh that bursts from you every time you narrowly escape death. 
He HATES how often you have to NARROWLY ESCAPE DEATH. So he will never tell you.
He almost doesn’t have time for his own shenanigans anymore, because all his time is taken up by trying to make sure you stay alive.
And you’ve figured out that if you turn *any* of your ideas into a money-making one, he will join you whole-heartedly.
So you bribe him because what’s money to you anymore anyway?
Leviathan
I mean he doesn’t leave his room much, so tbh he probably just gets texts from you that make him want to scream.
‘hey uh levi say if someone were to hypothetically be stuck in a succubus’ devil basement to become an unwilling sacrifice to asmo what would that person, hypothetically, do?’
‘probably die’ is usually all he sends back
You always come back, because he always sends a text to the other brothers. In that case Asmo came to rescue you himself and scold the succubus.
You become the friend that he makes funny throwing-shade reddit posts about. (Devvit? Devil reddit? Eh??)
‘Levi so this has nothing to do with anything but is there a cure for a dangerously potent ‘always win at rock-paper-scissors' curse? Asking for a friend’
‘Friend is being held hostage tho so maybe be quick about a response’
He didn’t even know that kind of curse existed. None of them did. What the fuck did you do.
How did you get taken captive by playing rock paper scissors?
He doesn’t know. Nobody does. He expects the play-by-play so he can recommend it as a new anime to his favorite producers. 
Somehow your chaotic plans end up with stories almost as great as TSL. 
Beelzebub
He physically carries you around.
He’s like “fuck this you can’t get into trouble if I’m holding you.”
If Beel’s on MC watching duty, he’s almost the only one who is successful, just because you physically cannot get away. 
But at the same time, he is very easily bribed. 
So yes, he’ll go to Madam Scream’s with you at 3am. Sounds like fun.
But he is very protective after losing someone he cares about (who you remind him of so much….) so he keeps you close when you’re out and about too.
If you start getting into a fight with some other demon he literally just takes the fight for you and wins with no trouble at all.
You like having Beel with you.
Especially finding street festivals! You’re in a whole new world and there’s a MILLION things to try. Beel is more than happy to try them with you.
But that leads to arguments about whether deadly creatures to humans are still deadly when dead. 
“No, you can’t eat that it’s on fire. I know even small fires hurt humans. I’ll eat it for you.”
“That hot sauce makes every demon I know cry. You really shouldn’t buy a bottle. Please. No, don’t try it. No, that’s too much for one-- oh. Oh no.”
He forgives you as long as you don’t actually get hurt and you give him your leftovers.
Asmodeus
“If I get wrinkles because of you I promise you will never hear the end of it. I will curse you forever.”
He swears on every single one of his lovers that you have started giving him grey hairs.
GREY HAIRS, MC.
Why can’t you just settle down and let them all take care of you? You don’t have to prove anything to the other demons!
But you will. You’re living in Devildom now, and by everything unholy, you are going to live that life to its fullest extent.
He was thrilled at first when you were all for joining him at his nightclubs and parties. Now he hides every party’s date from you.
That time you almost threw yourself off a balcony to try and emulate a very drunk demon’s newest dance move.
“I need to stay TRENDY, Asmo!! I’ll be fine!!”
Ever since learning Demonus doesn’t affect humans you have challenged every single stuck-up tough boy to a drinking contest.
And every single time you win, Asmo has had to *narrowly* save you from being killed by said demon.
And you just say “he deserved it” every time.
And like, yeah okay, he probably did but YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO DIE.
Somehow, you manage to out-party Asmo.
dON’T TELL THE OTHERS but he lives for the times when you practically fall asleep on his shoulder while coming home from a rager. You may not get drunk, but when you’re sleepy, you’re so affectionate and something in his heart melts.
Satan
At first, Satan was all for the rebellious “life life with no restraints” thought process you explained to him.
I mean, he didn’t like the assumption that he and his brothers couldn’t control themselves to not accidentally kill you, but also… fair.
But he didn’t realize that this mindset followed through for EVERY demon in ANY place.
Including RAD, where old and wizened demons were *really* not used to being contradicted
Which led to you “accidentally insulting” your 5000 year old Human Studies professor by giving them a pop quiz on current memes (which they failed).
And left Satan as the one who had to make sure that said professor didn’t kill you. 
And the thing is, this keeps happening.
You’ve written all over the school’s library books, pointing out every error.
You *continue* to argue with the demons who threaten to kill you when you say silly things like “No, Solomon did not learn his sorcery at Hogwarts because Hogwarts isn’t REAL.”
(Solomon, meanwhile, refutes you vehemently and seems to grow three inches taller every time you glare at him.)
Satan assures you that he values knowledge and truth and all that, but could you maybe find a less dangerous way to push it?
No can do, Satan, because you already had plans with Mammon to use a curse that writes the history of the actual Sorceric Academy that Solomon attended like 400 years all over the desks in Human Studies. It’s activated by anyone saying “Hogwarts”. 
No, no, Satan, it’s brilliant, because you can’t do magic. It can’t be you who did it.
Satan, no don’t tell Lucifer.
I thought you hated him. Satan, wait. 
You are the only person in the history of ever who convinces him to come to Lucifer for intervention. You wear that badge with pride and also deep, deep, bitter sadness. 
Belphegor
Like, through the plot your willingness to be a thorn in anyone’s side just to get more information really works for Belphie.
He’s like all I gotta do is ask? Sweet. Yeah. Go, human.
But then when he’s all big and threatening and “im gonna kill you” and you just kind of look at him and nod like “yeah, this checks out.” 
Frankly, that’s rude, MC. 
And then he keeps threatening to kill you and it doesn’t even PHASE you like. You just keep listening to him rant and going “OH i think i get it now”
He liked that you were always looking for more information when he was the one pushing you around, but now?
No. Human, he is going to KILL you here, STOP ASKING QUESTIONS.
And then you do the time-travel bit, and see that he *literally has killed you in one timeline* and you just like
Shrug it off and keep talking about Lilith???????
Tbh what probably stopped him from doing it again is just that you’re fucking insane, MC 
“MC, you literally just saw yourself dead in Mammon’s arms”
You wave your hand vaguely in his direction and say, “Yeah okay, but can we talk about the lack of communication in this household because it is tearing this family apart.”
What the fuck MC
When he’s back to normal, tbh he loves that side of you. He loves getting into shit when he’s not sleeping. He will 100% encourage you and be there to make sure that you *don’t* actually die again.
He’s the only one who doesn’t actually try to stop you. Who knew he was so into chaos.
But if you try to drag him to a plan when he should be sleeping he will be like Beel and literally just hold you down while he naps dammit. You brought this on yourself. He needs sleep.
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borat123 · 3 years ago
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NaruHina Analysis
Naruto Manga Part 1
Part 1
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Naruto’s opinion about Hinata isn’t very positive at first, but if we apply context and compare her description to other characters it’s actually quite interesting. He comments on how she looks away when he looks at her. Now this may not seem that special at first but it actually means that he has noticed her enough to know that she looks away and has enough information to know that she’s shy. He also described Sasuke as a guy who acts cool and that he hates, but no one would argue that his bond with Sasuke is likely his strongest bond. His descriptions are obviously quick and superficial and are mostly just comedic relief. Shikamaru’s description was that he was a lazy bum and his description of Shino was that he knew nothing about him. So he atleast has some familiarity with her that sticks out in comparasion to other characters, actually his description is probably the most detailed out of all of them. He seemed to have put more thought into hers.
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Naruto is stuck in his own world and fears failing the test so he doesn’t even notice when Hinata sits down next to him. Could also be of course that Hinata is shy and doesn’t want to attract attention to herself so she moves quietly. Besides she overcomes her shyness and initiates words of encouragement to Naruto.
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Naruto is suffering with immense stress and panic over the test and Hinata notices and sympathize with him.
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Then just after Naruto decided not to cheat, Hinata offers him to look at her test. Naruto, who is not used to acts of kindness because of his childhood, is so shocked over this that he even blushes a little bit. This little act of kindness from this girl touched him so much more than people think (enough to make him refuse to cheat because he didn’t want her to get in trouble because of him).
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He questions her offer in his head thinking stuff like ”why would someone do something like that for me?”. Kindness to Naruto is something that is so foreign to him that he denies it and thinks it must be a trap.
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But then he immediatly thinks ”nah Hinata wouldn’t do that” and accuses Kiba of forcing her to do it instead. So he does seem to know her somewhat from the academy since he knows she would never do mean tricks. He also switched his suspicion of her onto someone else rather quickly for someone he ”doesn’t know” didn’t he?
He asks her why, and after seeing her struggle with her anxiety he seems to have a sligthly sympathetic look.
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Haha Naruto so dense, he not know she likes him hahhaha
No im just joking, lets actually put some context into this.
Yes, Naruto isn’t the smartest, but there are more to him not understanding what she means than that. Think about Naruto’s childhood. He has never experienced parental love, he was constantly treated like the plague and everyone in his village hated him for something he didn’t even know about. Of course, someone showing actual care and kindness towards him confuses him, it doesn’t help that his IQ is probably below average, but still, you get what i mean. Also lets not forget that he is only 12 and picking up signs that a girl likes you is not something you are usually skilled at, at that age. Also Hinata is shy, and it can be hard for someone as extroverted as Naruto to understand her not so direct statement.
After his very confused expression, Hinata panicks and comes up with a (apparently) good excuse, that excuse also seems to make perfect sense to Naruto lol. (We can see here that Hinata is not yet confident enough with her feelings for him though, obviously has to do with her self esteem issues because of her clan).
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Naruto then express how lucky he is that he’s next to Hinata, this could also indirectly be viewed as him saying how lucky he is that someone cares for him like Hinata.
He then notices the chunin writing and then it hits him how cheating could risk him (and Hinata) getting caught.
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He puts on a little bravado in front of her and says that an incredible ninja like him doesn’t need to cheat.
Then he shows concern for her and says that she could be caught too (He shows concern for her before his own team even). Honestly if someone else offered him to cheat he wouldn’t act this nice at all. He would be rude and act in his usual hotheaded way. It’s because of her shy and calm nature that he even refuses to cheat in the first place or maybe somewhere in his subconsious mind, he thinks that it’s wrong to take advantage of someone who shows kindness towards him even at a huge risk for their own. The truth is that deep down he was very touched by Hinata’s act of kindness.
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Hinata then gratiuitously apologizes. And Naruto responds that it’s OK. He then does a funny face and says that he’s an idiot.
For some foreshadowing on Kishimotos part, we see Hinata reacting to Naruto’s fear over the 10th question before anyone else does. Why does this matter? Because it’s Kishimoto building up Hinata’s concern for Naruto, specifically. Acknowledging him.
We see here how Hinata is already willing to risk herself to help him, something that will become a running theme.
Also an interesting detail from earlier.
Haku’s line ”if someone who acknowledged you from the bottom of their heart appeared, wouldn’t that person become the most important person to you?”
This line seems to perfectly describe Hinata and i dont think that it’s a coincidence that the arc right after that introduces Hinata and focuses so much on her feelings for Naruto and her acknowledging him more than anyone else. Of course Naruto doesn’t know this yet, but in The Last he finally realizes who that person is, Hinata.
Part 2 Part 3
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notnctu · 4 years ago
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7 days: dream series ♥ [DISCONTINUED]
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welcome to the realm of sugary shy looks and bursting stirs of butterflies in stomachs. here lies a fluff series of yearning for a secret love! we’ve all had it before, a manifest of infatuation for a what if? Counting down days of possible love confessions and silly, yet embarrassing moments that will mark first impressions. and wondering: maybe we could happen...
a nct dream fluff series ♥´・ᴗ・`♥
genre ��� fluff, maybe some angst, vaguely happy endings
details ❥ crush!au, highschool!au, college!au, a sweet series where dreamies either have a crush or someone has a crush on them, slice of life? 
warnings ❥ swearing, that’s all i have for now lol its pretty pg, this will be continuously updated once i start writing
a/n ❥ this is author doie ❀!! stories are NOT connected. i clearly love to make series lmao so i decided im going to make a series based off of each song in the RELOAD album haha so keep an eye out for future series. also 7 days is one my fav nct songs & i had to write something as sweet as that song. dont worry, the ridin’ club is my top priority! but i need to take breaks between writing y/n fucking 00line LOL i can only drown in so much dick. taglist is open! pls reply/send an ask to lmk if you want to be a part of it :)
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MATCHMAKER - lee haechan
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“I think you two would look good together.”
“But is that something you really believe?”
━ details: where haechan has the fattest crush on you, but so does his friend.
━ warnings: explicit language, light banter
━ synopsis: Haechan’s secret crush on you backfires when he finds out that his own friend wants to pursue you, with his help. Since he’s a better friend than he would be a potential lover, he pushes aside his feelings to set you and his friend together. But he can’t ignore them for too long when he sees his own reflection in your eyes whenever you look at him or the brief moments your fingertips have grazed against one another. He regrets playing matchmaker and hopes that you don’t notice his lingering stares and the heavy beating of his heart. 
━ status: reject
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OPPOSITES ATTRACT - lee jeno
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“Every person I’ve dated before has been very different from me.”
“ha ha! you know what they say, opposites attract...” 
━ details: where you and jeno are similar in every way possible.
━ warnings: anticipating none
━ synopsis: Jeno rides your same exact wavelength, down to every small detail. Growing up in the same neighborhood, attended the same high school, sharing the same birthday, apparently sharing a cat allergy, being in the same major, and having practically the same favorites, you two finally cross paths in a psychology class about love and attraction. The irritating saying, “opposites attract”, has your small crush on the boy in low spirits. But the very moment your psychology professor debunks its credibility, your heart soars with a hope that Jeno could like you back. 
━ status: reject
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CUPID’S ARROW - huang renjun
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“Cupid has made you into a fool for your crush.”
“He’s made me into a bigger one for thinking I could get my crush to like me back.”
━ details: where renjun makes a bet to get you to fall in love with him.
━ warnings: explicit language, light banter
━ synopsis: The silly boy has no idea what he’s gotten himself into when he makes a bet with his arrogant friend to get you to fall in love with him. Renjun never intends to confess, mainly because his past unrequited loves have demolished his confidence. So a low stakes gamble causes him a great deal of stress and pride, wishing that it was as easy as striking you with Cupid’s Arrow. While he wants your feelings to develop organically, he actually doesn’t know what he’d do if you did end up liking him back. Because to him, you have always been someone unattainable and out of his reach.
━ status: confess!
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HIT MY LINE - na jaemin 
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“First rule: don’t develop feelings.”
“Second rule: don’t break rule number one.”
━ details: where you break the first rule of being friends with benefits.
━ warnings: mentions of fucking, explicit language
━ synopsis: Jaemin started out as a good friend, one who shared the commonality of a disastrous break up with their long term partner. So, you two vowed to stay single and go through the ‘hoe phase’ all your single friends suggested. But hooking up with each other became a consistent occurrence and rather exclusive. Boundaries had to be made clear once you two established the want of continuing your mutual lust. Nevertheless, through his lovely comments in bed, the cute pet names he calls you, and every fucking sweet implication, you’ve fallen head over heels for your friends with benefits. 
━ status: reject
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VALENTINE’S DAY - zhong chenle
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“You’re probably going to get a lot of gifts on Valentine’s Day.”
“Yeah, but none of them will be anything special to me.”
━ details: where chenle knows you’re lactose intolerant and have a flower allergy.
━ warnings: none
━ synopsis: Chenle is assigned as your partner for an end of the year group project, without any knowledge of the small infatuation he already has for you. While you two have never exchanged more than a few words, Chenle sees this as the perfect opportunity to get to know your heart. As Valentine’s Day approaches, the young boy has to figure out a memorable way to confess. All the typical gifts are thrown out the window once he learns that you’re allergic to dairy and flowers, and your forgetfulness leaves stuffed animals stranded. You don’t make it easy for him, but that’s one of the many reasons he’s completely whipped for you.
━ status: reject
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P.S. I LOVE YOU - park jisung
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“This looks a little bit like your handwriting.”
“As if I’d ever write about how your eyes twinkle with star light.”
━ details: where jisung is unaware that you’re the one leaving letters in his locker.
━ warnings: none
━ synopsis: Jisung has been your childhood best friend for your whole life. And you’re close enough to the point where people think that you’re actual relatives. While you have no clue how he feels about you, it hasn’t stopped your heart from loving him ever since the first time he tied your shoes. Park Jisung is your first and only crush, there has been no other clumsy boy to steal your heart away. Before the end of your Senior Year, you plan to tell him how you feel. However, you leave out one important detail in your love letters to him: your identity. 
━ status: reject
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simonsrosebud · 4 years ago
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heyyyyyyy
so basically this week has been v stressful for me (this post is mainly so i can rant and get it out of my system).... 
ab 5 days ago i saw my 3 friends from home (i go to college in west virginia but im from new jersey hehe) did an xmas gift exchange without me and i don't care for getting gifts bc im not like that but i was just a lil upset that i wasn’t involved or invited in general (which is smth that has happened often) so i told my one friend (fake names) sydney how i felt left out and sometimes unwanted or whatever just in general bc i know they talk & have a chat without me for no reason.  and i said u know i get it im at school away from u guys but i’ve said before u know i like hearing what’s going on w u guys idc if u talk ab hometown stuff in a chat with me.  
sydney basically disregarded my message and misunderstood it as me being mad that we don’t hang out a lot during a pandemic which, uh, is not true.  it was just ab a chat and how i wished they reached out more while im away bc i reached out and didn't get that in return.  so then she brought up “and u have a large family and i can't keep track of them so don't get pissed for not wanting to hang w u” which- woah.  don't bring my family into this when u have no idea what they do, and also bc it's just not what i’m talking ab.  dude, we were just talking ab a group chat on our phones.
granted, if she'd told me this as a heads up when i came home for the winter i would’ve taken it better, but the way she used it was kinda as an excuse and it was just irrelevant anyway.
she got mad and i said “okay i’m done” and she told me im reckless about covid and that “none of us talked with each other u weren't special”.  girl, i’m far from special i know that.  but don’t lie to me bc i see u post pics hanging with (more fake names) julie and carly often.  i didn't say this bc it wasn’t worth my time, i let it go and accepted that we now weren't friends bc once sydney has a minor argument with someone they’re dead to her.
so then there’s carly, who was my best friend but had also not talked w me a lot since i went to college in august.  i knew in the back of my mind that carly would follow sydney and that i’d probably lose the whole group from one argument bc that's how sydney works.  but i kept my hopes up and today i texted her just ab something random just like oh haha i saw this the other day, and she was all like “how r u gonna do all this and txt me like nothing happened?”.  and i explain that yes me and sydney had a fight but not u and i.  my sister apparently blocked them all on instagram but i literally only found out when she told me so i was v taken back and apologized for that, and when she said “it doesn't matter she still did it” i was like really?  ur gonna blame me for something im not in control of or didn't even know of until right now?  and finally i txt u like nothing happened bc i don't want to put u in an awk position in the middle of it.  we go back and forth, me explaining that i was talking ab a chat in the first place and she eventually tells me how well its also hard for them to interact with someone who said that hanging w us is a chore.
yes, i did say this once.  but i said it to only her only ab the first time we hung out (socially distanced outside) when i came home for the winter.  i called her a few days after to tell her how i was confused when i saw her w ppl inside a friend’s house when she told me she couldn’t do that.  i explained that it was hard to go somewhere new knowing no one and to have radio silence from them when i’d put the effort in and not get it back, so seeing them that day when i came home almost felt like a chore bc i didn't know how they felt ab me and bc it felt weird to see them after that silence.  she was sympathetic and said u know yes i understand that and all- but here she is using it against me when i told her that while crying on the phone.
i tell her this- that that doesn't make sense or add up (im sparing lots of details) and that for her to take something i told her in a state of such vulnerability and use it against me was not okay and not an excuse she can make esp when this all started ab a group chat, it just didn't FIT.  and her response was well “all we do is argue ab this stuff.  at this point it is clear that this just isn’t working out anymore”
imagine someone saying that about your 6 years of friendship just because you tried telling another friend that sometimes you felt left out and like u were outcasted from the group.  that's why she said “all we do is argue ab this”, bc i’ve had the will to bring up the fact that they quite frankly treat me like nothing multiple times.  we don’t argue, i told u how i felt and u think i’m attacking u.  imagine your best friend telling you “good luck at school but we can’t be friends anymore bc u and sydney had an argument and i don't feel like putting in the effort to be a better friend to u”
idk that's just what it’s felt like.
so today has been quite the day for me.  or the week, rather.
if anyone got this far into this post, kudos and give me a quick kalton prompt to do in reward for reading it all LOL.
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descendantofthesparrow · 4 years ago
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Multipart Commission Work - Harry Hook x Reader - A Prince Behind the Pirate - part 2 - dreams
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=
Uma huffed, lifting a heap of trays in her arms, grunting from exertion as she carried them back to the kitchen. She rolled her eyes as she passed by the tv, the “royal cotillion” planners were on screen again.
It was unfair, they were born lucky with all the clothes and food they waned, while the people of the isle were lucky to be born, scrounging for scraps of food and sewing Auradons scrapes of clothes together to just wear something at night.
She tossed the trays into the sink, wiping her hands on her apron. “go ahead and get some sleep Uma, ill clean up” cook offered, gently pushing Uma out of the kitchen.
“you sure I can-“ cook shook her head, shoving her out and closing the kitchen door.
“im sure, tomorrow is your only day off, so get your rest” Uma nodded, undoing her apron and tossing it on her chair.
“Alright, see you Monday”
“see ya”
Uma’s eyes caught the tv again, the 2nd daughter of Aurora on screen again, Uma’s eye twitched at the bright and oh so happy princess.
“shes probably spoiled rotten without care for anyone else” Uma muttered, hitting the power button and shutting the tv off. “when I get out of here, they'll be the ones serving gruel.
=
Harry twitched in his sleep, kicking his blanket off. He was surrounded by blankets and blankets of green plants “grass” he thinks its called.
A soft bell-like laugh came from beside him, he whipped his head around, spotting the girl he had been meeting in his dreams since he was 15.
“hi~” she chimed, flattening out her sundress and smiling at him.
“hey,” he sighed, laying back on the grass he couldn’t feel “hows yer day been lass?”
“stressful, I've been planning for --muffled-- for the last two months,” she sighed, making harry frown.
“that sucks” he muttered, reaching out and playing with a loose thread on her denim jacket “didn’t yeh say yer friends helpin’ yeh?”
“Yeah but she's busy with the other half and im helping --muffled-- with making outfits for the event and --muffled-- keeps bothering me about my sister and it's just a lot” she sighed again and looks down at him smiling, the light obscuring her face other than her lips.  “so how have you been?”
“ugh” harry groaned, rubbing his face “bad, my dad’s been havin’ me work double shifts an’ all that’s on tv now is that cotillion trash”
He knew the girl couldn’t hear exactly what he said, as for some reason, anything that could allude to something that could find the other was muffled.
All they knew about each other was their age, gender, and favorite color. Yet the bond was growing between them every visit.
It had started back when Harry turned 15, one night waking up to a girl in a soft blue dress staring bewildered at him, her lips conveying her surprise.
“Who are you?” they had both asked.
At first, they thought the other was just a figment of their imagination, but soon they had figured out the other was real, that somehow they were connected and were able to talk to each other in their dreams once a week.
He knows that the girl was his age, was female (obviously), and her favorite color was lilac, “the perfect mix of pink and blue!” she had said. She also liked strawberry chocolate crepes and drawing.
They talked for a couple more minutes, the girl looking up as the world started to become even brighter around them. “oh, I guess its morning already huh?” she muttered, looking back down at him and smiling “see you next week?”
“See yeh next week” harry murmured back, saluting her goodbye as they woke up.
=
You blearily looked at your alarm clock, yawning as you sat up and clumsily hit the off button. “I still wish I knew your name” you muttered to yourself, smiling as you remembered he boy with fluffy black hair and a nice long red coat fit for a captain.
When the dreams of the boy first appeared, you confided in your mother, who had told you the same thing had happened with your father and her, dream walking, she had said.
As you got older she explained in more detail of what you could do when the fairy had blessed her at her christening, they had also given her the ability to find her true love in her dreams.
Where she had “met” your father Phillip.
Audrey was born without it apparently, pouting whenever you would gush about the boy to your parents.  She never teased you about it though, being with Ben at the time.
Your cousin Ariana had been merciless about it, saying how as soon as he would see you he would run for the hills in terror, and how she would get him instead.
The boy had told you to punch her when she teased you about him again, you did, and you were grounded until you told them about her teasing.
Ariana was grounded for two months after that and had ceased in her cruel acts.
All you know about the boy was he was your age, his favorite color was red, and he loved the sea and octopuses.
You glanced at the clock one more time and sighed, finally getting out of bed and grabbing some clothes and a towel, getting ready for the day.
An hour and a half later you were all ready, tying your laces and making sure your new pink leather glove was on completely.
Your phone beeped and you quickly picked it up, seeing a text message from Ben
-hey, I need your help with some stuff after school, meet me in my office okay?-
-kay- you typed back, stuffing your phone in your pocket and tossing your Bluetooth earbuds around your neck.
Tossing your bookbag over your shoulder you walked out of your dorm and headed to the cafeteria for breakfast with Jane, Mal, and Evie.
=
“Hey (y/n)!” you perked up, smiling at Jane as she waved you over, picking up the last (fav fruit) you picked up your tray and quickly walked over to the table, setting your tray next to Janes and greeting the two vks.
Mal hummed numbly as she poked at her food, zoning out staring at the isle. “Mal you good?” you tilted your head, Mal jumped, looking at you surprised.
“huh!? Oh uh, yeah! Im good, perfectly good-good” she popped a strawberry in her mouth, sending a strained smile at you.
You raised your brow suspiciously but looked away as Jane started to talk about cotillion plans.
You suddenly got a text from Audrey
-hey, any new things with your dream boy-
You smiled, Audrey may be the classic mean girl to many people, but she was your sister through and through, you both knew the pressure of your grandmother and had become closer through that
-kinda, hes been stressed cuz his dads making him work double and something on tv is bugging him-
-cool, any clues?-
-no, nothing much other than hearing more pirate stuff-
-lol, with how much he talks about pirates you'd think hes from the isle-
-would you have a problem with it?-
-(nickname) there’s a difference between your true love being from the isle and someone spelling someone for the wand-
You shook your head, smiling at her “approval” of the boy who might be from the isle.
-yeah yeah I know, I gotta go, ttyl-
-ttyl <3-
You put your phone in your pocket as the bell rang, shoving the last bite of your breakfast your mouth and picking up your orange juice box.
“see you guys later!” the girls waved you goodbye as they raced to their own classes.
You glanced at your watch, 5 minutes before your class started, history of huntsman and pirates, your favorite class, ever since dream boy started to talk about them all the time.
=
Harry sighed, leaning against the counter at his dad's fishing shop, tapping his hook on the counter as nothing happened around him.
His mind drifted off to the dream girl, she had explained simply that she could dream walk, and had somehow connected their minds during sleep.
It was a pretty easy to believe explanation, ya know since they lived in a world filled with magic n stuff, so Harry had no reason to say she was lying.
“boy! You better not be slackin’ off!” harry jerked, scratching the counter as his father suddenly yelled.
“im not!” he yelled back, pouting as he leaned back in his chair.
He couldn’t wait to get out of here and sail the seas, free as a bird.
--end of part 2--
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dahniwitchoflight · 4 years ago
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Homesquared Chapter 16
Alrighty, that was a fun tangent, now back to John it seems?
Oh, no, Narration of John (So Actually Dirk, speak of the devil and he shall appear and all that etc etc)
“ leaving John with one final touch on the shoulder. John leans into it in response, though he’s a bit ashamed of chasing down a sliver of physical affection so soon after obliterating Karkat’s evening like he had. “
pfft lol so Im not the only one that thought it would be funny if that scene was interpreted in a Pale Romantic light, even though that really wasn’t what was happening
OIh! but we still get Roxy, just the other version of Roxy
Roxy subtly being like “hey!! shit has apparently gone down, were not exactly close atm but I feel bad about you dying to want to know if youre still alive so im gonna message you while trying to make it look like i dont care about it as much as I do”
JOHN: trying to align my memories of my youth with whatever is happening right now so
and the wonderful question is, what IS going be happening with you now John?
Roxy looking nice and casual, but also yeah narration, why are you making this ominous, its not like Roxy’s out here to double spy on behalf of Jane, I don’t think Roxys on her side THAT much
ROXY: may have to do a smidge more if my old bff decides im next on the list for bombing out
ROXY: but so far so good
ROXY: just a coupla exploded cars in the yard from some shenanigans our dear son and his friends were in but u kno it is what it is!!!
Roxy once again being a master of hiding how shes feeling, even when trying to open up, feeling pretty stressed about whats happening with Jane, understandable, the exclamation points give it away lol
The narration is really trying to make John nervous though
OH lol that was the implication haha no lol John it obviously wasn’t that
“John feels his shoulders unbunch. Of course. Yeah. He’s almost embarrassed by how relieved he feels. So what if his ex wife wanted to hook up? Shouldn’t that be a situation he could navigate? Don’t people like to find solace in human physical connection during dire times? Why did the idea of it make his mind white out in panic more than, say, any number of the traumas he just experienced? He doesn’t know, but he believes Roxy that he must look pretty haggard. He probably feels haggard? Maybe sitting down will feel better.“
lol once again, Dirk has no idea how to read Roxy at all and just trips over himself and his assumptions XD
Yeah, looks like Roxy not on the Jane train and is doing some takesies backsies, shes glossing over her feelings on the matter still though, I know thats par for the course of how Roxy tends to handle stuff too but I wish shed open up a bit more, but maybe shes playing the smart game, yknow, knowing that Dirk has a hard time reading her, so glossing over stuff is how you protect yourself against the narrative force, confusion and vaguery in the narrative and her actions only helps her to keep control over it, because at any point, you can decide to “clear up” any narrative “miscommunication” or “confusion” and lay down what is it thats actually happening with you any time you want
Void working in the behind the scenes to do what they want
JOHN: like it’s my HOUSE.
JOHN: but mostly it always felt like my dad’s house?
JOHN: and when i started living there after i moved out of here, it was like i crammed myself back into whatever was left of my kid self?
JOHN: and it didn’t feel good, but it at least was familiar, you know?
JOHN: like living there let me feel closer to my dad, trying to be like the way i remember him, or like how i remember him wanting me to be, or something?
JOHN: and i didn’t realize how much i hated doing that until i saw it all go up in flames.
JOHN: so i guess i could have used my powers to stop the fire and save whatever was left of the place, but i couldn’t bring myself to do it.
JOHN: like some fucked up part of me was glad i got there too late?
JOHN: so i just sat there, watching, trying to figure out why watching my house burn down felt like i was being released from prison.
JOHN: and even now i keep trying to explain it away, as though it’s because of how fucked up everything else is that it made me feel good.
JOHN: but that’s just bullshit.
JOHN: it DID feel good.
JOHN: i DO feel free.
JOHN: sorry.
ROXY: no need 2 apologize
ROXY: we just delved in2 my whole gender thing last time so it seems fine for u to have a turn
JOHN: i didn’t say it was a gender thing.
Im pretty sure you’re talking about a gender thing John, like, very 100% sure now this is what’s happening
because if you were actually a girl, of course you’re dad leaving all these notes about how one day hes gonna be so proud of the man youll become, yeah, that can feel a little pressuring, even if your dad didnt mean it like that, since he was unfailingly the kind of dad just bumbling around trying to understand their kid as best they could and leave encouragements everywhere, thats what his intent was, but all his notes come off a bit wrong in particular issues
remember the note under the fridge that was all like “SON. IF YOURE READING THIS NOTE, YOUVE FINALLY BECOME STRONG ENOUGH OF A MAN TO PICK UP THE FRIDGE.” not exactly that but that was always the vibe Dad’s little notes always had
Yeah, i can see how John would view it as a bit off, but if he hadnt the self awareness to realize it was a gender thing at the time, hed be understandly confused as to why such a thing would bother him
now though, he’s realizing, maybe, he doesn’t exactly want to be the man his dad always encouraged him to be
John does seem a lot happier here in his convo with Roxy than he did on his own when the house was burning, that conversation with karkat left me wondering if John was about to start dissociating he was so down, but here he says he feels freeing and happy about it?
ROXY: but like now that u mention it
ROXY: *meaningful pause*
JOHN: …
JOHN: i
JOHN:
John’s beginning to question stuff, or acknowledge that he’s questioning stuff, cuz it’s true, and hes feeling happy about it, in a way that he wasnt before, but he hasnt quite connected the dots here between the happy feeling and what exactly he has to be happy about
ROXY: aight then no wind bending just use your mangrit
Roxy flexes, the corner of her mouth pulled up into a familiar grin. John feels his guts, so recently calmed, twist up into knots again. Her eyebrows shoot up and the smile loosens. He must have shown something on his face.
ROXY: ok or just like push when i push
ROXY: we both got sick muscles
ROXY: no other adjectives necessary
JOHN: yeah ok.
Yeah Roxy’s 100% picked up on it, and maybe Dirk has as well if the narration is commenting on it
Alrighty then, to the secret lair under the bed!
oh I just noticed how kind of cute and interesting Roxy’s nickname for Harry is, “Lil H A” Harry Anderson shortens to Ha like laughter haha
and if Harry had Roxy’s last name, it’d be Harry Anderson Lalonde
Lil HAL
lol what is Callie doing under Roxy’s secret bedchamber XD
This whole secret bedchamber thing is turning into one big metaphor isn’t it?
That thing behind the curtain kind of looks like the Attic Portal shape from Hiveswap though
that’d be neat if that was it, like obviously we knew one of the cherubs had to have something to do with that portal just going by the design of it alone
Honestly it makes sense that Callie is doing it under the curtain of Roxy’s Void, it’s honestly the safest place to do something like that
lol Calliope has grown past writing fanfic about shipping and being in love, now the drama of broken relationships and divorce is all the rage XD character growth? haha
CALLIOPE: besides, hUman divorces are even more fascinating than i had ever imagined, and being able to witness yoUrs in motion was an honoUr.
CALLIOPE: so i consider Us aboUt even at this point.
Calliope just burned him harder than his childhood home’s destruction
CALLIOPE: ah right, right. yoU're probably a little cUrioUs as to where the dickens we are.
have you been talking to Jake lol (I mean, probably Original Grandpa Jake tbh if that portal is actually the portal)
Alright so John is getting caught up on the major plot points, Earth C is indeed in the large black hole, his choice didn’t matter since both choices happened anyway yadda yadda
CALLIOPE: think of it like a coin flip.
CALLIOPE: the series of events that led to Us being trapped beyond the event horizon of an Ubermassive black hole could be considered "tails", while the events which would have occUrred otherwise could be considered "heads".
CALLIOPE: since both were possible, and paradox space is the way it is, they actUally both happened. and we jUst "happened" (hee hee) to get tails instead of heads.
yup yup yup pretty par for the course of timesplits in homestuck so far
CALLIOPE: not at all! since both possibilities depend on one another's existence, it really doesn't make sense to call them "right" or "wrong". they both just "are".
yup, this is true, the ending’s of both referenced the others, so it’s disingenuous to say one is “canon” while the other isn’t
one is simply in the realm of actual possibility, the other is in the realm of unlikely possibility
More than likely, John would have chosen to leave and go die and be the hero like in Meat, but there was still the possibility that he would stay, even if it was unlikelier than the other, but since both were possible choices for him to realistically make, both actually happened for real
CALLIOPE: anyway, the reason i went on this tangent in the first place was to explain that the space we are standing in right now has a special significance, in that it is the location which corresponds to the black hole's singUlarity
that’s interesting, so there’s the original meteor that crashed into the surface of Earth C, and it’s in here that the singularity of what I don’t wanna call the Green Hole to match the Green Sun when I wanna talk about this specific Black Hole lolol
but yeah, here in this meteor lies the crux of the paradox it seems, interesting, also interesting again, this is where that Hiveswap Portal is
Hiveswap does have a plot point of “Joey must do thing in 11 days otherwise Earth and Alternia will be destroyed” and the only known destruction event of Earth and Alternia so far in canon is the Green Sun’s Creation from the destruction of both universes (and then later Callie’s destruction of the green sun into the black hole) so is Hiveswap gonna be a factor in the green sun’s destruction/creation as well? (Joey has the symbol of the Green Sun for a reason, I’m super curious as to what factor Joey has in relation to the Green Sun’s Existence, We still don’t know what the fact those black monsters are too, they’re like nega-first guardians, the kind of things that look like would come out of a Black Hole that came from the Green Sun tbh)
It’s all inter-related I tells ya
ROXY: ur not gonna enter a weird time vortex and change the trajectory of a little girls life with the power of love
JOHN: aw.
You say that now but
CALLIOPE: it's not strictly speaking "bad" for Us to be inside of a black hole, mUch thoUgh that contradicts most of what anyone knows about them.
CALLIOPE: of coUrse, if we had fallen into it, that woUld be a whole other kettle of fish.
CALLIOPE: the tidal forces woUld have stretched Us all into spaghetti and then ripped us apart!
CALLIOPE: bUt the natUre of oUr arrival was more akin to simply "being" here, sUddenly. one moment we were not, and the next moment we were, and somehow always had been.
yeah that’s basically how this multiverse’s reality works, the future is a thing that already physically exists, just in a different location in the universe somewhere else
time travel and spacial teleportation could be said to be the same thing all along
that’s why violating the events of the future has actual consequences, because its like asking to go somewhere that doesn’t exist but how has to exist because it’s the future, too much of that and reality starts cracking at the seams to make room
same thing happens with sessions and playing sburb
the planets and dreaming moons and all that simultaneously have always existed here, and started existing only because the player played the game and the planets were generated upon entering a session, but to the player involved, it looks and feels like you are just being teleported to a different location in the universe, because you also kind of are
CALLIOPE: i mean, the natUre of space and time is a little finicky in here, bUt for the most part it doesn't seem to be anything too oUt of the ordinary.
CALLIOPE: bUt beyond that, it means that we are sealed away from the rest of existence.
CALLIOPE: oUr sphere of inflUence is limited to the sphere of the black hole's bounding horizon.
CALLIOPE: as far as everyone else is concerned, we might as well not even exist!
So you’re just in a little seperated bubble, that’s not connect temporally to any other place of existence, you aren’t anywhere in the past or the future of anywhere else
nowhere leads here, and here can not lead outwards either, theoretically, and yes it exists, so it must also
JOHN: is there no way we could let anyone know that we're in here...?
CALLIOPE: almost certainly not!
CALLIOPE: there are very few ways for anything to escape the kind of predicament that we are in right now. one of them is to be an all-powerfUl being with control over the very fabric of space, with the energy of two Universes at yoUr disposal.
CALLIOPE: in which case, escape woUld become rather trivial, if a little Unscientific.
JOHN: ok. i am going to assume that we can't just do that.
CALLIOPE: yoU've hit the nail on the head, UnfortUnately. U_U
CALLIOPE: the method i described was the one employed by my alternate self, who yoU may recall crashed through the event horizon in the body that once belonged to jade harley.
CALLIOPE: she departed through a pUnctUre she created in the black hole's surface shortly after consUming my brother, a deed which provided her with the necessary "oomph", and which was frankly rather breathtaking to watch. =u=
CALLIOPE: bUt Upon her departUre, the rift closed for good. as far as i can see, there's simply no way for Us to commUnicate with the world oUtside the black hole.
CALLIOPE: i woUld certainly be very sUrprised to find oUt that anyone had managed sUch a thing!
So someone else definitely has managed to do such a thing
JOHN: knowing that we're inside of a black hole... does that actually change anything?
JOHN: like, can't we just go on living like normal?
CALLIOPE: oh absolUtely not.
CALLIOPE: i don't know if yoU've noticed john bUt this world is on the brink of a total cataclysm.
JOHN: oh.
CALLIOPE: oUr exclUsion from the overarching coUrse of events which governs all reality means that oUr existence here is liable to dramatic and violent Upheaval.
CALLIOPE: to pUt it another way, becaUse nothing in here "matters", we are likely to be sUbjected to things which are a bit bats in the belfry, for no reason other than it's totally insignificant to the wider canon of reality.
CALLIOPE: and mUch thoUgh i am personally titillated by some of the conseqUences of this predicament, it is a degrading way for Us to live. u_u
JOHN: that's... certainly one way to put it, yeah...
yeah, so because here in the black hole neither affects the past or the future of anywhere else, being so disconnected, they are technically free of the reigns of the Alpha Timeline that exists elsewhere in the multiverse
the Alpha Timeline now being understood to simply mean, The Narrative
Things are the way they are because they are thus written to be so
CALLIOPE: at first, i believed that this was simply necessary. Us playing tails to oUr coUnterparts' heads, the black to their white, and so forth.
CALLIOPE: bUt over the years i have come to the conclUsion that this is simply not kosher.
ROXY: its total bs is what it is
CALLIOPE: right, yes.
CALLIOPE: a steaming pile of bUllshite.
CALLIOPE: and so we have decided that something needs to be done aboUt it.
Hmmm. It’s a dangerous idea to be playing with for sure, to decide all the black pieces in the game of chess suddenly become white, it is a very flip turning of reality upside down to be sure
To be honest, I’d think you’d need a powerful Doom player at your disposal to even try something like this
or actually, a powerful Doom user would be most likely to shut this entire thing down, knowing how bad of an idea it’d be, maybe it’s more you need a powerful Life player to do something like this instead
is that also why Dirk viewed Jane as an ally then? She would technically have the kind of power to upend the black and white doomy laws of reality if driven to her full potential, i mean obviously yes, we know this already because of the candy colored I-can-do-whatever-I-want-with-no-consequences lollipop
Is this what Calliope hopes to achieve with the Hiveswap Portal then? her goals for Joey and friends are to be the ones to prevent their universe’s twin destructions, and thus the Green Sun’s initial existence and then also the destruction into the Black Hole after the fact? that would be one way to prevent the Black Hole from existing, making it so the thing that creates the black hole never exists either
and that's certainly a canon event that would be difficult to tear asunder without major consequences
That would be a “Re-writing Homestuck from the very beginning” level of canon event
And if I’m correct, Joey is theorized by me to be a Mage of Life, if any classpect at their full potential was gonna do something like that, or have the impossible knowledge to something impossibly paradoxical like that, well..
ROXY: but u dont need to worry abt busting us outta space jail tbh
ROXY: thats not ur problem to fix
JOHN: oh.
JOHN: i'm... not sure i follow, then.
ROXY: i mean yeah ur gonna obvs facilitate it in a sense
ROXY: but only by going and busting the person who can actually help us outta normal earth jail
CALLIOPE: we need yoU to free vriska from the clUtches of oUr misgUided friend jane, and bring her here, to the singUlarity.
ROXY: weve been calling it the plot point
CALLIOPE: yes, the plot point is a key part of oUr plan.
CALLIOPE: as far as we have been able to sUrmise, the only remaining method for escaping oUr grim confinement depends on leveraging the UniqUe properties of this location to create an event of sUch catalcysmic proportions that it simply cannot be contained within the black hole any more.
CALLIOPE: something SO dramatic, so hyper-relevant, that it becomes ontologically impossible for anyone to ignore it.
CALLIOPE: for that, we need an individUal of sUfficient narrative cloUt, so to speak.
CALLIOPE: and to liberate her, who better than the embodiment of the aspect of freedom itself?
I mean yeah! makes sense! Johns major factor here is Freedom, Vriska’s is Importance
and yeah, I can think of no other wholly dramatic event that to mess with stuff with the Green Sun, everyone will have eyes on that, they have to, their whole existence the way it is relies on it
But, they could also mean something else, its only condition is that it has to be something so imflappably impossible, something so not-canon and so outrageous that it basically horse-shoes around to the other end of the canon spectrum to being something that truly exists again
and that could be literally anything and it’s nerve wracking and exciting to see what thing theyre gonna come up with to just directly kneecap Homestuck itself
ROXY: thx babe
ROXY: oh is it 2 soon for that joke or
JOHN: no, weirdly enough, that one’s fine.
(yeah that’s because Babe can be construed as feminine June)
so, I’m basically convinced they’re doing June Egbert now
that to me was like, pretty severely on the nose
John: Hey Roxy, what it does mean when you find a sense of freedom when all of the symbolism of the masculinity surrounding your childhood burns down around you
Roxy: idk It’s probably a gender thing man
John: I didn’t say the word gender-
Roxy: It’s ok babe no pressure, we can hash it out later
John: Hmm, later then. :)
Roxy: (Turns and looks towards the camera with a knowing smile)
shit all that imagery makes me think of Roxy as that picture of the small kid smirking at the camera while a house burns in the distance XD
21 notes · View notes
horansqueen · 4 years ago
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You & Me : chapter 38
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A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA
Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS
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CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28 || CHAPTER 29 || CHAPTER 30 || CHAPTER 31 || CHAPTER 32 || CHAPTER 33 || CHAPTER 34|| CHAPTER 35 || CHAPTER 36 || CHAPTER 37
NOTES:
-one chapter is her pov, the next is his -4.3k - 4.9k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.
READ AM CONVERSATIONS AGAIN ON WATTPAD HERE
- notes: nothing happened yet things happened? idk how i feel about this, i just hope you enjoy it, thank you guys for sticking up to this story ilysm!! oh and i chose this gif just because hes sweating lmao youre welcome! i hope this chapter gets more notes than the last haha
if you want to be on the list of blogs i notify when this is updated, just message me :)
requests! : i added as many as possible lol i even got one WHILE i was writing and added it lmao!
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TAKE A LOOK AT THE CHARACTERS HERE
Chapter 38 : Her chapter
OLIVIA
April 17th, 2018
"You know what people say when they see a fat girl run." I just let out, raising my nose in a grimace as I tied up my shoes.
"I'm not really the type to listen to stupid people's opinion." Niall replied, making me roll my eyes and sigh before getting up. "And you shouldn't either."
He had convinced me to go run with him and I regretted my 'yes' half a second after agreeing but the way his face illuminated told me that it was too late to go back. I hated running and he knew it, and I was pretty sure he was aware of the sacrifice it was for me. I normally always quote the movie "The Faculty" when he mentions running, because i believe there's no truer words than Casey's line at the beginning of the movie when he says 'I don't think that a person should run unless he's being chased.", even if it's sort of ironic since the characters end up running away from an alien who wants to infect them the whole movie. Well, I would probably run if an alien was trying to infect me, too. And apparently, I would also run if it made Niall happy.
"It's easy for you. You've always been popular and cute and all the girls were in love with you."
"That is a big load of bullshit." he chuckled, shaking his head. "I've been told 'no' many, many times."
"I would like to see the statistics of the number of girls telling you 'no' versus the number of girls telling you 'yes."
This time, he's the one who rolled his eyes but he still had a cute smile gracing his lips and it made mine curl, too.
My parents were spending the whole day at friends' house. It was planned before I told them I'd come and visit them and even if they told me they'd cancel, I insisted that they'd just go. I didn't want to ruin their plans, I knew it was some anniversary or something similar and I could spend one day alone with Niall. Easily. Hell, I wanted to spend way more than one day with him.
"The only statistic I care about is this one." he started, clearing his throat. "How much do you love me, on a scale of 1-10."
I let out a genuine laughter and it made his lips curl. "That scale reaches the sky and it's too far away for me to see any number but there's like, 10 digits."
He took a step closer and I moved my chin up as he bent down to press his lips against mine. It felt so good to be back into this, to have a routine together, and to be happy without stress. I wouldn't go as far as saying it was exactly how it used to be but If I took the time to really think about it, it was even better. Back then, he was a bit immature and I was extremely insecure. Those two flaws sort of clashed together and made our relationship so much harder to handle. Now, I was not as insecure, and he didn't seem immature anymore, and I really felt like it could work between us.
We walked out but started running as soon as we were down the stairs. I let out a short groan of annoyance and it made him laugh. I knew he was going slowly just for me and it made me feel a bit guilty. At the same time, I was doing this for him and because he insisted, so the least he could do was wait for me, right? I don't know how long we ran but I hated it. I hated the burning sensation and the dry feeling in my throat, i hated the sweat on my back, and i hated the pain in my legs. God, I hate running. But then I turned to look at him and something twisted in my stomach and I bit my bottom lip. I loved watching him sweat. There was something sexy in watching him like that but it was not really the time and place to jump on him, unfortunately.
"How's your asthma?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Tolerable." I said, glancing at him again. "How's your grandpa knee?"
He chuckled and shook his head, making me smile more. "Could be worse."
After a while, I just stopped, feeling a cramp hurting like hell on my side, and held myself on my knees. He stopped next to me and bent down to look at me. He looked amazing, how did he fucking look so good all the damn time?
"You okay? Enough for today?"
I nodded and he smiled but I held my breath when I felt his hand on my back. I was in it so deep but I secretly hoped that I would never have to hurt again. I had new limits that I wanted to respect but I wouldn't ask him about every single girl gravitating around him, or cry myself to sleep because of a comment online. However, I would still get pissed if he let an other woman who clearly wants in his pants put her number in his phone, and I wouldn't accept him flirting with random girls at bars. The first time we dated, everything seemed to get to me but this time, It would be different. I would choose my battles and not get insecure about every little thing I see. I believed in myself more and I was convinced it helped me believe in him more, too.
We walked back home quickly and from time to time, I could feel his fingers brush against mine. It's in times like these that I really just wished we could be a normal couple. I knew he would be unhappy if he didn't do music for a living, and it would be a shame if his talent and songs weren't heard by millions of people, but selfishly, sometimes, I wished we could just walk around hand in hand without being scared of the comments, the articles and the hate.
I unlocked the door and when I took my shoes off, I grimaced and groaned low, moving my toes and quickly pulling on my socks., leaving them by the door.
"Petal, you reek." he let out before I turned around, raising my eyebrows. He chuckled and shrugged. "It's true, you smell so bad right now."
"I know!" I finally admitted in a laugh.
"But hey, you don't smell as bad as I do." he added, making me laugh more.
"That's practically impossible." I joked as he stuck his tongue out at me.
I watched him bend down and rub his knees and I bit my bottom lip as I felt a wave of intense love for him wash through me. I took a step closer and he moved his body up before looking in my eyes. I tilted my head, nibbling on my lip again and reached for the bottom of his shirt, finally pulling it up. He moved his arms up to help me as we kept staring at each other. A small smile draw itself on my lips and I just licked them, letting his shirt fall in the floor. Slowly, I let my hands run on his chest, my fingertips brushing against his nipples and moving down to his stomach. I felt my heart hit so hard against my rib cage that I thought it was going to escape. I could feel the sweat on my fingers and for some odd reason, it turned me on even more. My hands stopped at the top of his shorts and he raised his eyebrows.
"Are you gonna take them off, too?" he asked in a low tone.
"You know what I really want?" I asked in a low tone, ignoring his question as my forefingers hooked in the sides of his shorts, pulling them down slowly. He raised his eyebrows to incite me to talk and I smiled more. "Your dick in my mouth."
He didn't answer anything but his lips parted slightly and I slowly got down on my knees, bringing his shorts and boxers with me. I took his cock in my hand and when I got closer, he quickly stopped me.
"Wait!" he let out. I frowned and looked up but he just sighed. "We really need to get in the shower, first."
I stared at him for a few seconds and finally let out an amused chuckle before finally getting back up. He smirked and moved his upper body closer, his lips dangerously close to mine, before reaching for the bottom of my shirt.
"I honestly don't want you to be disgusted by my dick forever." he let out, making me chuckle again.
"Can't happen. But you're right, we should get clean first. Then fuck. And then get clean again." I proposed, making him raise his eyebrows up and down.
"And then maybe fuck again, yea?"
I smiled more at his words and nodded. "Yes."
He moved closer and kissed me, taking a few steps my way and forcing me to move back. He took my shirt off, throwing it on the floor, and I started laughing against his mouth when I accidentally stepped on something and ended hitting my back on the wall.
"Fuck, I love your clumsy ass." he whispered, slithering one of his arms around my waist as the other reached for my breasts. "And your tits, too." His hand moved down and slipped in my panties, making my eyes roll back as I leaned my head against the wall. "And your perfect little fanny, too."
He crashed his mouth against mine too as he flicked his fingertip on my clit a few times, making me whimper before he just took his hand away to pull on one side of my pants. I helped him with the other and stepped out of them. We were both just making out naked against the wall at my parents' house and I couldn't remember the last time I felt this horny. Was that adrenaline or something?
"Mm, your parents aren't coming back soon, right pet?" he asked in-between kisses as he pressed his body against mine. "Because they probably wouldn't enjoy the trail of our clothes on the floor that leads to the bathroom."
I laughed and shook my head as he pulled away. My eyes roamed on his face and It just hit me again how much I loved him.
"No, they'll be gone until very late tonight."
"Good."
He kissed me again and after a while, he pulled me to the bathroom and I tried to keep my mouth against his in a failed attempt as he bent down to start the shower. We laughed against each other's lips and ended up under the stream. I shivered as he grabbed the soap and poured some in my hands before doing the same in his. I washed myself quickly, staring at his hands moving on his body and when he reached his half-hard cock, I felt my heart jump in my chest.
"Sit on the side of the bath." he told me, making me obey immediately.
I was grateful that he didn't ask me to get on my knees because there's honestly nothing more uncomfortable for the knees than a bath. He moved closer and I smiled more when I realized his cock was at the perfect height. I felt like I hadn't had his cock in my mouth for so long and I took it as deeply as I could, making him groan low. I felt him swell on my tongue and spread my knees apart, bringing one of my hands between my legs.
"Mm, don't stop darling, do that thing you always do."
I chuckled low and pushed on the skin of his cock just to run the tip of my tongue between it and his tip, making one of his legs shake slightly. I used my fingers too, touching exactly the same spot and his head moved again to look down at me.
"That feels like I'm just cumming over and over again, fuck!"
I kept going for a while and finally ran my tongue on his length until his balls. He grabbed his cock in one of his hands and started stroking himself. I stuck my tongue out and felt his balls rub and bounce on my tongue with every jerk of his hand. I moved closer and sucked on one of until he grabbed my hair and pulled my head away gently.
"Open your mouth."
I did as asked and gently, he pushed his had cock in my mouth until I choked and pulled slightly away. I could feel him throb on my tongue and I let two of my fingers rub my clit gently as I sucking him harder.
"Stick your tongue out."
I looked up at him a bit innocently and opened my mouth, sticking my tongue out for him. He kept jerking himself hard, brushing his tip on my tongue as he did, and after about a minute, he let out a low groan.
"Fuck, I missed cumming on that tongue."
My eyes closed for a few seconds when his cum spurted on my cheeks, lips and tongue but I moved closer to suck on his tip again, my hands reaching for his balls as he kept stroking himself until he got down from his high. I never really enjoyed the taste but Niall’s orgasms were different, and I knew it probably only had to do with the love I felt for him, but it didn’t matter. He tasted good and I loved pleasing him. He panted for half a minute and finally grabbed my arms to pull me up gently.
"Even if you look really good like that..." he started, bringing me under the stream. "Let me help you."
Slowly, he ran his fingers on my cheeks before moving down to my lips, taking the vestige of his orgasm off. My heart jumped in my chest when he kissed me deeply and I moaned in his mouth as his hands ran on my breasts.
"You need an orgasm too." he pointed out as I nodded. "Sit back down."
I did what he told me to and frowned a bit when he got on one knee, knowing how much it hurts. We could both feel the water falling on us but when he moved his lips to my neck, I let my head fall back and closed my eyes. Two of his fingers slipped inside me as he nibbled on the skin of my neck and he started fucking me slowly. His mouth moved down to my breast and the way he sucked and licked my nipples made my fingers rub against the bath in a weird and annoying sound.
"You're gonna let me fuck you hard later today, won't you princess?"
I shivered, realizing I hadn't heard that nickname in a while, and finally nodded. "Mmhm, whenever you want, wherever you want, for as long as you want. You know I'm all yours."
"Fuck, say it again."
He started finger fucking me harder and I felt my breasts press against his chest as he bit my neck harder.
"I'm yours, Niall, I'm all yours." I let out in a mix of a whimper and a whisper.
"Get up."
I felt a bit too weak to do it but I still managed and when I felt his mouth crush on my pussy, I leaned my head against the cold and hard shower wall. I brought on of my legs up on the side of the bath and focused on the way his tongue skillfully sucked and licked my pussy until I felt an orgasm hit me without warning.
"Oh fuck! Niall!"
I reached for his hair and pulled on it hard, making sure his face stayed between my legs and It took me all my strength not to literally let myself fall at the bottom of the bath. When he got back up, he wrapped his arms around me and I allowed myself to get weak close to him, making him laugh.
"Good?" he asked. I nodded, brushing my nose against his wet neck and whimpered low. "Hungry?"
                                                   ----
The park was not too crowded and the sun was slowly setting. We started eating the lunch we had prepared together and I surprised myself wishing every day would be like that. It was ridiculous and impossible, but a girl could dream, right?
"What do you think would have happened if we never broke up?" I asked, staring at my water bottle before looking up in his eyes.
He was staring at me, his eyebrows raised and his lips curled into a pensive expression. He looked adorable and I smiled fondly at him. He shook his head slightly and grabbed his fork, playing with his food for a few more seconds.
"I don't know. I like to think I would have matured anyway and wouldn't be a prick but you never know." he explained with a shrug.
"You think you would have cheated on me?"
His head snapped up to look at me and he shook his head harder this time. "No. I was a flirt, but I was not a cheater, I promise."
Obviously, we would never know, and from what I had seen of Niall, he normally broke up with the girl before giving in to anyone else... well, except with me. It made me realize he had cheated on two girls with me and I tried to push away the guilt invading me. After all, I had cheated on Dylan too. The fact that he knew and had decided to ignore it didn't make my action less painful, or okay. We both had cheated and there was no excuse for it.
"You cheated with me. I did too. We both cheated. On Heidi and Dylan, and that was so wrong."
"I know." he sighed. "We can't go back. I mean I wish I could say I regret it, but I don't. It lead us here."
I sent him a sad smile and nodded. I wanted so much for us and even if I still had a few doubts, I wanted us to work. I wanted us to make efforts into this, but I couldn't make them for him. All I knew was that I was going to do everything I could to make this work, and from the way he had been acting with me lately, I was pretty sure he would do the same.
"So what's gonna happen to us now, Niall?" I asked softly. "What's our future together?"
He looked down immediately and it made me frown. Did he have something to hide? I couldn't start thinking like that again, I couldn't start analyzing his every move. I breathed it and let it go, simply tilting my head.
"We'll love each other, become official whenever you're ready, maybe even start attending galas and shit together, perhaps." he proposed, shrugging a shoulder and making me laugh.
"Yea, that's not really your type of things." I pointed out.
"Well it's different with you. Everything is different with you. In a good way. In the best way."
Without thinking, I held myself on the grass between us and leaned my upper body his way to reach his lips with mine. He kissed me back and after a while, he deepened the kiss. I didn't feel nervous, or stressed, and I didn't give a fuck about who could see us.
"I love you. I want to spend my life with you." I whispered. "I know these words used to scare you... how do they make you feel, now?"
I pulled away enough to be able to look in his eyes and his lips curl into a genuine smile.
"Like the happiest man in the world."
My lips curled into a happy smile as something stirred in my stomach. "You're so full of shit, Horan."
He brought one of his hands to my cheek and I leaned against it without thinking.
"I mean it Liv. Trust me." he murmured as I felt his breath hit my chin.
I breathed in deeply and pressed my lips together before whispering too. "I do. I trust you."
                                                        ---
We ended up watching tv together in the living room after the sun was set and I knew my parents could be back any minute, making me wonder if we had time to fuck or if we should just wait until they would be in bed.
"I wish you'd come with me in Germany." he let out randomly, taking me out of my thoughts.
"You... you know I have to go back in California soon." I explained, feeling my heart sink in my chest. "I mean, we can survive a few weeks away, yea?"
He turned his head my way and sighed. "Of course we can. But we shouldn't have to. And.. I don't really want to."
"I know." I said in a low tone, trying not to cry and looking down at my hands playing with the fabric of my shirt. "I mean, I don't know what else we can do. I'll try to get more weeks off but I don't know when that will be. When's your next week off?"
"Uhm, mid may, I think, but then I have to go back to the UK for that radio show thing."
"Oh." I brushed my palms on my face, suddenly tired and a bit scared, not knowing when I could be with him again. "Tell me the exact date and I'll try to fly there for a few days."
"That's in like... a month, Olivia." he let out a bit annoyed or disappointed... or both.
"I know." I whispered, swallowing hard, trying not to cry.
He sighed again and made a quick head movement. "Come here."
He didn't have to ask me twice : I threw myself against him as he wrapped his arms around me and I buried my face in his shirt, letting out a sob that I desperately tried to suppress without success.
"Hey, it'll be okay." he whispered, kissing the top of my head. "We can do this. We're stronger than ever together. Distance is alright. A month is nothing. Remember my trip to Asia?"
It's not that it was a bad example but it was a rough memory and I sniffed, shutting my eyes tighter as I tried to move closer to him. I didn't want to be a month away from him but I knew it was probably going to happen and I didn't know how to handle it. I was about to answer something when both our phones beeped and I groaned. It couldn't be a good thing and we both knew it.
"I don't want to look." I admitted low as he rubbed my back gently.
"We have to. Let's do it and then go to bed."
I sighed again and nodded as we both grabbed our phones. The problem was apparently Heidi, who had posted a bunch of song lyrics on her instagram stories, and people started speculating about who it was about. After checking, though, I knew it was about Niall. And about me a bit, too.
SHAKIRA - DONT BOTHER She's been to private school And she speaks perfect French She's got the perfect friends Oh isn't she cool? Hey, hey So don't bother I won't die of deception I promise you won't ever see me cry Don't feel sorry And don't bother I'll be fine But she's waiting The ring you gave to her will lose its shine So don't bother, be unkind
THE WEEKEND - CALL OUT MY NAME We found each other I helped you out of a broken place You gave me comfort But falling for you was my mistake I put you on top, I put you on top I claimed you so proud and openly And when times were rough, when times were rough I made sure I held you close to me
JUSTINE TIMBERLAKE - CRY ME A RIVER You don't have to say, what you did I already know, I found out from him Now there's just no chance With you and me There'll never be Don't it make you sad about it?
SAM SMITH - IM NOT THE ONLY ONE I have loved you for many years Maybe I am just not enough You've made me realize my deepest fear By lying and tearing us up You say I'm crazy 'Cause you don't think I know what you've done But when you call me baby I know I'm not the only one
DRAKE - MARVINS ROOM I'm just sayin' you could do better Tell me, have you heard that lately? I'm just sayin' you could do better And I'll start hatin' only if you make me
KATY PERRY - PART OF ME I just wanna throw my phone away Find out who is really there for me You ripped me off your love was cheap Was always tearing at the seams I fell deep, you let me down But that was then and this is now, now look at me
LITTLE MIX - SHOUT OUT TO MY EX This is a shout out to my ex Heard he in love with some other chick Yeah yeah, that hurt me, I'll admit Forget that boy, I'm over it I hope she gettin' better sex Hope she ain't fakin' it like I did, babe Took four long years to call it quits Forget that boy, I'm over it
TAYLOR SWIFT - SHOULVE SAID NO You should've said no, you should've gone home You should've thought twice before you let it all go You should've know that word, bout what you did with her Would get back to me And I should've been there, in the back of your mind I shouldn't be asking myself why You shouldn't be begging for forgiveness at my feet You should've said no, baby and you might still have me I can't resist, before you go, tell me this Was it worth it Was she worth this
SUGARLAND - BABE What a waste Taking down the pictures and the plans we made, yeah And it's strange how your face doesn't look so innocent Your secret has its consequence and that's on you, babe Since you admitted it, I keep picturing Her lips on your neck, I can't unsee it I hate that because of you, I can't love you Babe What a shame, didn't want to be the one that got away How could you do this, babe?
BRITNEY SPEARS - PERFUME Do I imagine it, or do I see your stare Is there still longing there? Oh I hate myself, and I feel crazy Such a classic tale Current girl friend, ex girlfriend, I'm trying to be cool Am I being paranoid, am I seeing things? Am I just insecure?
I read her stories twice, three times, and I swallowed hard until I heard Niall curse under his breath next to me. It caught my attention and I sighed, licking my lips.
"She's right, you know. I don't know how she found out but, we talked about it earlier. We did cheat on them, Niall."
"Alright, but did she need to expose that on instagram?" He closed his eyes and groaned, throwing his phone on the couch and rubbing his eyes roughly. "Are you ready for the storm? You know our social medias are gonna fucking explode."
"It doesn't matter. As usual, we're just gonna stay quiet." I replied, shrugging and sighing an other time. "You should have never dated that girl."
"I know. I didn't know back then but now, I know." he confessed, shaking his head. "I didn't think she was that kind of girl."
I started laughing next to him and his eyes met mine. He raised his eyebrows an I pressed my lips together because chuckling more.
"I mean, seriously, Niall? She was always like that."
He remained quiet and moved his arm on the back of the couch before I leaned my head against it.
"I should have dated you when I was 13 and I tried to match you with Rian for no reason. I should have dated you when I was 16 and horny. I should have dated you when I joined One Direction and you messaged me all the time. I should have dated you after the Take Me Home tour, when I came back home and noticed how much you had changed. I should have dated you during our last tour, before you got attached to Harry. I should have dated you last year, when we were both miserable. I realize it's you I should have dated all those times. Whenever I dated an other girl, it should have been you."
I teared up but tried to swallow the emotions inside me but they were drowning me instead, making me dizzy and happy at the same time.
"Yea, you should have." I whispered, scared that my voice would crack. "What about now, Niall?"
"Now?" he asked gently, raising his eyebrows but his gaze never leaving mine. I felt his fingertips play with a lock of my hair and it made my heart twist in my chest. "Well now I'm here. I'm with you. And I don't intend or want to be with anyone else. Ever again."
67 notes · View notes
ghostcatsso · 4 years ago
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Time for a druid meeting with Justin. Let’s see what Fripp wants.
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Ah, dad moorland came too. Elizabeth quickly told him this is druid business and he’ll have to leave. Poor guy
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I took Justin to the secret stone circle
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Almost immediately as I got there, Fripp told Justin he was under arrest and thanked me for apprehending him. Excuse you sir I was under the impression we were gonna help him?
Apparently the druids don’t trust that Justin was tricked, they think he’s actually evil, so they’ll be locking him up. Great.
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We soul riders tried arguing his case after they had taken him away, but Fripp quickly distracted us. He has information on how to save Anne!
She’s been located in pandoria, and she appears to be much deeper than Lisa was. Far too deep for the Sleeping Widow to help again, that’s for sure. We’ll need a portal to pandoria. For that we’ll need a keystone that’s kept in the stonecutter’s vault in Dino Valley. To get to Dino Valley faster we’ll need a portal there, and to get that portal we’ll need another keystone. That keystone is just kept by Avalon, though. Much easier to get to
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Avalon struggled to find it among all the other junk he keeps in his pockets, but I got it eventually.
Back in the stone circle, Fripp instructed me on how to set up the portal
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Pretty keystone
And then Linda and I were told to go through and find the stonecutter’s vault and ask for the pandoria keystone. This should be interesting, since I have yet to unlock Dino Valley on this account.
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I took a lot of pictures of this inbetween worlds place and I’ll probably post them in a different post lol
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I’m in Dino Valley and SSO isn’t yelling at me to get out of a closed off area, so hopefully it’s fine. Poor Chance isn’t a cold tolerant horse, though, so it looks like we’ll be taking this slow
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Linda said she could feel strong magic and to follow her. Off through the creepy dead tree forest we go
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Until we came to a minecraft ice spike biome
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oh look there’s even an igloo. think we’ll find a villager and a zombie villager inside?
Linda said the magic she senses is coming from here. The door must be hidden by an illusion. We used our moon magic together and revealed...
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it’s just a hole, nothing exciting
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inside, on the other hand, is very pretty
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we found this ghost guy who says he’s Magnus Steinar, Jon Jarl’s stonecutter, and we must prove our worth before he’ll let us pass
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I gotta find the missing pieces to this runestone. Easy enough. I did it pretty quickly just running around the maze of corridors. I don’t see how this makes me trustworthy
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The Stonecutter said he probably should’ve given us a more difficult test, but he’s a man of his word, and he opened the door for us.
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I love this room, it’s so pretty! And right under the tree is the keystone for the pandorian portal. Time to head back to Fripp
Fripp told me how to set up the pandorian portal
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He said he needs the other soulriders to stay and help power the runestone, I’ll have to go alone. Oh cool, I’m sure this will go great.
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This inbetween space looks much more spikey. I’m sure that’s fine...
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finally, Pandoria. This place is so pretty but honestly, and I like pink, but it’s too pink.
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Anyways, I followed the trail and eventually found...
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I bet that’s Anne. Yikes, she does not look so good.
I tried to talk to her but she just told me to leave, that I’m wasting my time, that Garnok cannot be stopped. Oof.
And then Darko showed up out of nowhere
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And he summoned these tentacles, which I think are supposed to be Garnok himself?
Anyway, Chance and I decided we’re no use to Anne dead, so we noped outta there
Cue a stressful race where I was avoiding tentacles and mushroom spores and shadow seekers along with the normal race obstacles.
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and yes the tentacles were still after me through the inbetween
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im surprised i didn’t fail this race tbh, especially we me taking pictures lol
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Finally, I’m back. Fripp was confused where Anne was but interrupted himself to say something’s coming and I need to close the portal quick!
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Too late! Darko and maybe Garnok followed me through! Darko put some sort of spell on the other soul riders so they could move, and then ran to the keystone to take it for himself
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The thing about keystones that I didn’t mention earlier? You need to remove them carefully, or the portal could destabilize and explode, possibly sucking people into it. So when Fripp saw Darko grabbing for the keystone, he ran to stop him and
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The keystone exploded very pink and Darko was sucked back through the portal, along with those Garnok tentacles, but Fripp...
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Well, Fripp doesn’t look so good. He managed to say something about talking to someone named Evergray, before Elizabeth showed up. We told her what happened and she said Fripp must’ve taken in all the pandoric energy from the keystone himself. The druids will be able to heal him, but it’ll take time.
She took him away and I was left with the soul riders
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I told them what happened and we agree we have to save Anne, and this Evergray is our only lead. We decided to go ask Avalon who Evergray even is
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Avalon seemed very reluctant to tell us much about Evergray, let alone have us meet up with him. He’s an ex-druid who was exiled and he lives up north in a place full of witches.
We told him it was Fripp that told us to find Evergray and that finally convinced him. He said he would send word that his exile is over and he can come back. He’ll let us know when Evergray has returned.
6 notes · View notes
seblos · 5 years ago
Text
there’s not a star in heaven that we can’t reach - ch 2/10
chapter title: let’s stop swirling, and start twirling
word count: 3,351
[one | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight | nine (coming soon)]
read on ao3
Carlos now has a hall pass to miss the last 15 minutes of study hall so he can get to rehearsal early. He probably would have been allowed to leave without one, considering everyone in the cast had been excused half an hour early for costume fittings, but he has Mr. Mazzara to thank for the small yellow paper he clutched in his hand now.
Miss Jenn was already in the bomb shelter by the time he gets there, quickly typing away at her phone until she notices Carlos standing in front of her.
“Carlos, perfect, just in time!” Miss Jenn says as her phone made a fwoosh noise, confirming some order that Carlos couldn’t see. “I left the box of scripts in my office, so can you set up the desks and name cards for the read through? I’m thinking a circle for all the named roles, plus me, you, and our stage manager, and then the ensemble and the rest of tech can just be grouped together behind.”
He was about to ask why not just put everyone in a circle, but Miss Jenn had already made her way out the door towards her office. He shrugs, not caring enough to argue with her judgment. Miss Jenn knew what she wanted; he might as well follow her agenda.
Carlos arranges the desks the way she had asked, then quickly slides over the top of one as he begins putting down the name cards for everyone. He starts with his own choreography card (keeping a mental reminder to take a photo with it later) then director, stage manager, Chad, Troy, Gabriella, and Taylor.
The next card stops him though. Carlos reads over the neat printed “Sharpay” as the conversations he had with Seb from auditions washed over him, warming his heart.
 He glances over at the desk he had left off on, almost directly across from where he was sitting. Instead of putting it there, though, he bit his lip and turns, dropping the card on the desk next to his instead. 
With that, he kept going around the circle acting as if nothing happened. He makes sure to put the Ryan card next to Sharpay just in case anyone decides to ask why Seb was all the way on the other side of the circle from the other leads. Miss Jenn came back in a few minutes later with the box full of scripts.
“Oh that looks perfect!” she tells him, looking at the arrangement. Carlos sucks in a breath, expecting her to say something about the out of place Sharpay name card, but she doesn’t say anything about it.
The theatre kids begin filing through the door just as the bell rang for school to end as Carlos swipes through the few notifications on his phone as Miss Jenn calls for everyone to take their assigned seats. Nothing important, just a new post from Ashley Tisdale on Instagram, a few new twitter followers (he was surprised to see EJ Caswell was one of them) and-
Carlos groans, showing Miss Jenn the text he had gotten from Natalie.
“Who is Natalie Bagley and why do I care if her glands are swollen?” she asks.
“Our stage manager. Guess she’s not coming,” Carlos says, switching off his phone.
Miss Jenn immediately called out Ricky’s friend, Big Red, and asked him to read the stage directions. Part of Carlos is upset that she didn’t just ask him to do stage directions since it wasn’t like he had any lines to read, but it was fine. They needed more tech kids anyway, maybe this would convince him to join backstage.
Or so he thought, considering the next near-hour and half was spent painfully listening to Big Red read the stage directions. Carlos at one point had shot Miss Jenn a pointed look, who looked stressed out of her mind as she asked him to read the punctuation. Unfortunately, Big Red had taken that seriously, and no one had the heart (or the energy) to correct him after he started reading “Sharpay comma heads for class period.” This, plus Carlos’s ADHD made him feel like he needs to take a lap around the school. Maybe around all of Salt Lake City before he’s ready to come back to this.
Instead, he chooses to glance over at Seb to his left, who looks just as spaced out as everyone else did. An idea pops into Carlos’s brain, and he quickly scribbles down an SOS on the blank sheet of paper he had been using to take choreo notes (in which there were none, yet. He couldn’t focus like this anyway.) He then folds up the note and tries to make eye contact with Seb.
Unfortunately, the farm boy was still spaced out as ever, staring at the pages which he turned while everyone else did, although his eyes weren’t moving along the words. 
The universe decides to apparently help him out, though as while Carlos was trying to get Seb’s attention, he doesn’t notice his pencil rolling off the table until it was too late. It clattered on the floor, not catching the attention of anyone except for the boy sitting next to him. 
Seb breaks from his trance, reaching down to grab the pencil before handing it to Carlos with a grin, and Carlos uses it as his shot to quickly hand the boy the note as he takes his pen back. 
He takes the piece of paper in surprise, cocking his head at Carlos for a moment as he unfolds the paper as quietly as possible. For a moment, Carlos wonders if it had been a bad idea.
Until, Seb reads the note and a smile grew on his face, grabbing a pen from his backpack nonchalantly so he wasn’t writing back in highlighter. Carlos noted that it was cow print and wrote in shimmery light blue ink, which, aw. 
He passes it back a moment later, and Carlos grins as he reads the response. Underneath his SOS in round, loopy writing is Seb’s bubbly ikr? big red is the sweetest but this plus my adhd my brain is GONE.
Carlos grins when he reads it. He didn’t know Seb had ADHD too (it’s not exactly something he advertises either, to be fair) but it’s always nice to see someone who can relate. He quickly scribbles back same! im all for new tech kids but i think miss jenn should just let me read from here on out. and i hate reading out loud. (and i have adhd too, crazy lol)
He passes it back to Seb, who’s brow furrows he writes, passing it back a moment later. It now reads she really should. why didnt she? i mean, youre capable of anything, even reading out loud. (and that’s cool! i mean, not cool, but cool that you can relate :) ) 
Carlos smiles. It’s sweet that Seb thinks that about him. He writes not sure. perks of being the unpaid choreographer i guess. 
When Seb gets it back this time, he smiles. well, someone should pay you then. btw have you done the chem hw yet? mr mazzara is killing me
They continue passing the paper back and forth, veering off topic from the show and just talking about school and their families. It’s never been this easy for him to make friends, but something just seems right when he’s talking to Seb, even if its through a piece of paper.
They end up covering the paper, only pausing when Seb has to read lines. They have to move onto the back at one point before Big Red finally reads the last sentence of Act I, and Miss Jenn calls for a break. Carlos is about to scootch his desk closer to Seb’s when Miss Jenn gestures for him to come talk to her. He shoots Seb an apologetic look, who just waves him off with a smile before adjusting his jacket and instead moves to talk to Ashlyn, who looks surprised when he drops down in the seat next to her.
As he follows Miss Jenn over to a corner of the bomb shelter, he worries for a second that she’s going to call him out for not only not paying attention to the script but distracting one of the leads in the process. Thankfully, it seems she didn’t notice and instead starts asking about Ricky and Nini. (As if Carlos has any idea what’s going on between them. Again, hetero drama that he doesn’t completely care about.)
“Should we think about recasting?” Carlos offers. 
“Absolutely not, my instincts are impeccable.” Miss Jenn replies, then adds, “and I’m not scared of a challenge.”
“This one might be impossible. She won’t even look at him.”
“Don’t underestimate me. I come from strong stock. My mother bounced back from an autopsy.”
Okay, not the reply he was expecting, but Miss Jenn was already calling them back together, which meant another hour of listening to Big Red read Act II. 
When he sits down, though, Seb smiles at him again, and Carlos pulls back out the paper.
Carlos was packing up his backpack after they ended early rehearsal that day. Ricky stormed off, and maybe it wasn’t necessarily Carlos’s fault that he was quitting the show, but he could feel his chest getting tighter the more he tried to ignore it. If he had just pushed Ricky a little less or cut all the dance talk and tried just a little harder to get him to stay, they wouldn’t be in this mess. 
“Hey, do you need a ride home?” Carlos hears footsteps approaching. He hadn’t realized that anyone was still in the bomb shelter, but when he turned around Seb was standing there. They had talked before rehearsal and in classes, but during rehearsal, Carlos was barely able to spare a glance at the boy playing piano while he tried to teach choreography. Not that rehearsal was about interacting anyway.
“Don’t you live on a farm?” Carlos asks, even though he knows the answer. It’s more of a question of why are you offering a ride if you live so far away?
“Yeah, but don’t worry! Your house is on the way!”
Carlos squints at him, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly. “You don’t even know where I live.”
“No, but I’m sure it’s on the way,” Seb is grinning at him, and Carlos doesn’t want to say no. Besides, he told his mom they would be done at six, and it’s barely even 5 o’clock, so he nods.
“Yeah, if you don’t mind. That would be good,” Carlos returns the smile and Seb beams. He finishes zipping up his backpack, swings it around his shoulders as Seb finishes sending a message on his phone, and the two walk out the door of the bomb shelter together. 
“By the way, I like your shoes,” Seb says without even looking down, and Carlos feels the slightest bit of heat rushing to his face. The shoes in question are cow print, and even though he bought them before his conversation with Seb at the read through, he did think of the boy this morning when he put them on. 
“Thank you,” Carlos says. He’s quiet for a moment, before asking “how are you so happy all the time?”
Seb looks surprised. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, you’re always so smiley and nice, even when everything is crazy stressful, like right now. I feel like I’m just snapping and brushing people off.”
“Well, first of all, you’re definitely more stressed than me,” Seb says, turning his head towards Carlos as he speaks. “I barely played today, considering how much everyone has been arguing with you about the moves. I mean, just because Miss Jenn isn’t there all the time doesn’t immediately give them the right not to listen to you.”
“I think it’s that, plus being an underclassman,” he sighs, pushing open the doors to the main entrance of the school. “I mean, Gina respects me but she isn’t exactly the friendliest with everyone right now either.”
“Well, it’s not fair of them,” Seb says, and Carlos bites his lip. He already knew deep down what Seb had said was true, but just hearing someone say it out loud made it so much more real. 
When Carlos doesn’t say anything else, Seb continues. “Besides, it sort of seemed like you weren’t having the greatest time, so I was hoping if I was a little happier, you would be too. Is that stupid?” he asks.
“No, it’s not stupid. It helped. Thanks,” Carlos smiles, because it did genuinely help. Well, either that or the venting. 
Seb smiles again, and Carlos feels his heart flutter just a little bit. Something about Seb’s smiles always made him feel warm. They never feel fake, and they’re always just as bright as the last.
They stop in front of a car, and Carlos opens the door to the back while Seb goes to the front seat. Behind the wheel is a girl a few years older than them who he presumes is Seb’s sister.
“Carlos, this is my sister, Georgie,” he introduces, and the girl turns to smile at Carlos. She has the same blonde hair and blue eyes as Seb.
“Nice to meet you, Carlos,” Georgie says. “Seb texted saying you need a ride, so where am I going?” 
For the most part, the car ride is silent. There’s music playing, a mix of old 2010’s pop and musical theatre, and Carlos can’t tell who’s playlist it is as both Seb and Georgie sing along. It’s not uncomfortable though, and he smiles as he watches the two of them together. He only has step siblings, and he’s not nearly as close to any of them as Seb is. 
“Do you have other siblings?” he asks out of nowhere, and both Seb and Georgie laugh.
“Too many to keep track of,” Seb shakes his head. “I’m a middle child of seven.”
Carlos’s eyes widen. “Seven? And they’re all fully blood related to you?”
“Yep. four sisters, two brothers. Josephine is the oldest, then our brother Cohyn, then Georgie, then me, then Sophia, Paisley, and Isaac. We’re all two years apart, starting at 21 with Josie, except for Isaac who’s 5 and was a bit of a surprise,” Seb explains, and Carlos feels his head spinning.
“How do you remember all that?” he asks, causing both the Matthew-Smith’s to laugh again. 
“Years of practice. To be fair, I don’t know like, half of their birthdays,” Seb says, earning a punch in the arm from his sister.
“Do you have any siblings, Carlos?” she asks.
“Two stepsisters on my mom’s side, both older. Isabella and Victoria,” Carlos says. “Isa is in college and Vic is about to graduate, but she goes to West High. I have a lot of cousins though, which are basically my siblings.”
“Us too,” Seb smiles softly. Carlos is expecting the look that people give him when they realize his parents aren’t divorced, but there’s no change in his expression. It’s nice to not have people ask about it for once (not that he remembers a time before they were divorced anyway. He was three, it doesn’t really affect him anymore.)
Georgie pulls into the driveway of Carlos’s house, and Carlos opens the door. 
“Thank you for the ride,” he says.
“Anytime, Los.” The nickname hits Carlos harder than he’s expecting it to, and he stops for a second, registering it into the mind as his heart swells. Only family members had ever used that nickname on him before, and hearing Seb use it felt… different. But good different.
“See you tomorrow,” he says, closing the door and waving goodbye to the two before running up the steps to his house. He can see them driving away as he closes the door.
“You’re home early,” his mother steps out from the kitchen, and Carlos turns. 
“We ended early. Sort of a dramatic day.”
His mother laughs. “Always is in theatre,” and Carlos can’t help but laugh too. “How did you get home? You could have texted.”
“A… friend gave me a ride. Seb Matthew-Smith, he’s our accompanist and he’s playing Sharpay.” 
He can see a twinkle in his mother’s eye as she nods. “Got it,” she says, stretching it out as she gives him a look.
“Not like that, mamá, just a friend,” he rolls his eyes with a smile. 
“Well, I’m glad you’re making friends. Dinner will be ready in an hour, I’m going out to play bunco tonight, so make sure you and Victoria clean up,” she tells him, and Carlos nods, taking that as his cue to go upstairs.
As he reaches his bedroom, though, his phone dings with a text from Seb (they had swapped numbers at the end of the readthrough) about the chemistry homework. Carlos sets down his backpack, pulling out the homework in question, and sets it on his desk while he texts back. 
His mother’s voice rings in his head. I’m glad you’re making friends. It’s the first time in a while that he’s had a close friend, and it fills his chest with warmth. 
“Where do you sit during lunch?” Seb asks Carlos out of nowhere, plopping down on the seat next to him during study hall. He’s in the library, researching other school’s performances of High School Musical so he can try and get inspiration for their show. When Seb sits down, though, he pulls out an earbud.
“I mean, here, usually,” Carlos glances around the library. “Why do you ask?”
Seb shrugs. “Dunno, I’ve never seen you at lunch before and I was wondering who you sit with. I thought we might be in different periods, but we have gym and chem together sixth and seventh, and you mentioned to me yesterday that you have algebra fourth, so the only option left was fifth unless you take an extra class like some kinda psycho.”
Carlos blinks. “You kept track of all of that?” he asks.
Seb suddenly blushes slightly. “I mean, I don’t know the rest of your schedule, I was only really paying attention because like I said, I was wondering who you sit with. But I guess you sit with… no one…?” he trails off.
Now it’s Carlos’s turn to blush. “I mean, my mom plays bunco with the librarian so she always let me sit in here. The only other person I really talk to is Gina, but she has seventh period lunch. And I guess I could eat in Miss Jenn’s office, but sometimes she stresses me out and I can watch videos in here. Plus it’s a lot quieter than the cafeteria, although I did run into Ricky today-”
Seb cuts him off. “Would you want to sit with me and Natalie? It’s only us at our table.” 
“I- uh. Yeah. Sure,” Carlos says.
Seb nods with a smile. “Okay, cool,” he says, then turns in his seat and logs into the computer next to Carlos.
“Why do you keep inviting me to things?” Carlos asks suddenly, gnawing on his lip.
Seb turns back to face Carlos again. “What do you mean?”
“You offered to drive me home, now you’re inviting me to sit with you at lunch.”
He cocks his head, smiling, although still clearly confused. “Because we’re friends, dummy,” he tells Carlos.
“Oh,” Carlos smiles. “Okay. Cool.”
Seb nods. “Cool.” 
They both go back to doing their work silently until Seb turns around again. 
“Did you say you saw Ricky in here?” he asks.
“Yes! You’ll never believe what he did.”
“What?” “He told me he’s joining the show again! And then, he started dancing. Like, in the middle of the walkway!” They both laugh.
As Carlos continues filling Seb in on all the details of his previous conversation with Ricky, he can feel his heart fluttering. He doesn’t know what is with the other boy in the long run, but hey, at least they’re friends.
9 notes · View notes
opalgelance · 5 years ago
Text
thoughts on steven universe future
td;lr overall opinion: steven universe future is better than most of the original steven universe, especially seasons 3-5, but there are still some real iffy plotlines in future
i hate that the diamonds were redeemed but at the same time, the happy clouds blue and yellow putting gems back together scenes were so pure
it simultaneously warms my heart and infuriates me 
but we finally got a blue diamond song, god i love her voice
EDIT: also steven basically tortured white diamond and nearly killed her and it was pretty disturbing bc steven is 1. in a really bad mental state, like way darker than i thought they’d show him go, since this is technically a kids show and 2. was also kind of trying to hurt himself, which both hit me really hard bc i had similar periods of blazing anger, wanting to self harm and harm others that i felt had wronged me when i was a teenager, but its also what white deserves
ncsndlljklkcndkls i want to enjoy this show so bad but,,, steven having ptsd makes him a violent douche??? diamonds killed who knows how many gems in their reign and never really felt bad about it in original su but now they’re supportive life coaches??? no thank you
on more positive notes, i loved how priyanka described mental health and how she treated steven throughout the entire check up, she was so nonconfrontational and whenever he felt stressed she deescalated the situation,,, it was so good
the animation is the best its been since season 2. the poses are clean, very well drawn, and on model. there are more action scenes than like 90% of steven universe and they’re animated way better, like theres actual fighting and motion asjksacbcbj no one is stiffly posed, no one has strange proportions, no one is drastically changing sizes in between shots (well besides steven in growing pains onward but when he does change size its supposed to be like that lol)
i liked seeing the real roses but didnt love it? i wish we saw more of the roses designs up close, and i wish they fit a little more with the other quartzes? it might be just because its era 3, but the roses were all way more unique than jaspers and amethysts generally seem to be. i like that they were more unique designs and had different personalities, but surely the diamonds wouldnt have tolerated that back in era 1 or even era 2, had the rose quartzes not been bubbled? also i get that they’re reminiscent of pink bc she created them, but hippie and superfan were so naive, more so than other quartzes. if each quartz group was slightly different, it would make a little more sense tbh like if quartzes were the entire gem army, but each group was slightly different. i always liked the idea that rose quartzes were either the defense or the healers of the gem army.
little homeschool and guidance were fun and genuinely enjoyable, considering not a whole ton happens in them. i wish townie episodes had been more like them. like you could replace the gems with random humans, but it would still be a fun episode? idk, maybe involving the humans in gem stuff wouldve made better townie episodes, like lars and the cool kids. it wouldve probably helped steven feel more “human” too, if the human and gem worlds collided a bit more in the series.
bluebird was... an ok episode, but im not sure how well it will fit into what i feel like the end will be, where every episode of future featured someone steven helped or affected in some way, and they all come together to help steven when he corrupts. or rather, i guess if bluebird did say something, it would feel more hollow bc steven didnt help them lol the gems and universes were just friendly to them, and thats it. it wasnt as bad as a very special episode (my least favorite episode of future), but it felt like a townie episode with no townies LOL at least we got a new fusion i guess
a very special episode was just,,, infuriating. there was that weird football scene where they just like,,, talk about screen resolution for a minute then play the full commercial for little homeworld we just saw last episode???? i did genuinely enjoy the rainbow scenes, but it just built up to not nothing. oh no, it was something alright. the whole episode was just future vision and then theres like a minute long psa??? it felt like that wacky randomness that would have happened in like, ok ko, teen titans go, or clarence jaskjcbkcjbskb
mr universe is tied with dear old dad episode as my least favorite greg episode. i get how both of them feel. greg wanted to tell steven about how he escaped from his miserable childhood and remade who he was, no longer a demayo but a universe. the problem imo was that greg became way too absorbed in the past. it reminds me a bit of s1 pearl, how she’d proudly recount gem battles and basked in the glory of fighting for their freedom, but she struggled when she had to recount the more unsavory parts of war. and that really affected amethyst, since she didnt fight in the glorified war pearl told her and steven about. amethyst was the byproduct of one of the bad parts of the war, and that became part of her identity, until on the run, where pearl finally realized that she needed to tell amethyst that she wasnt bad. amethyst’s creation may have fractionally hurt the earth, but that wasnt her fault. it wasnt her fault that she emerged too late to fight either. and it wasnt her fault that she existed. sounds familiar to to stevens rant in the van. 
steven didnt ask to be made. he didnt ask to be the half gem half human son of a diamond. but he grew up being told about how great his mom was, and that while no one would ever say it, she was gone because of him. to create steven, rose had to die. it was roses decision, but as the product of that decision, steven feels responsible. not only that, but being told constantly about his amazing mother, steven felt like he had to live up to her, had to be like her, had to replace her in the gems and greg’s lives. throughout the series, steven is constantly either trying to be like his mother, until he realizes its ok to be himself. but then the question is posed; is steven even himself? or is he still part of rose? and once he finds out that he’s steven, and has always been steven, he’s still reeling from the realization that his mother was pink diamond. and that really shows in future, where steven is becoming like pink. at first he doesnt even know, because besides the jungle moon dream, him and the audience never knew about this side of pink. this angry, short tempered, diamond who lashes out mostly physically. and unlike before, no one’s telling steven about pink (besides pink pearl) hes finding out firsthand, and this pink mode is basically being forced on him by his gem. steven has little to no control over this form. hes not trying to live up to his mother, or wondering if he is her, like before. now, he’s losing control to whatever programming is in his gem.
but back to mr universe. in the van, greg is going on and on about how lucky steven is, and how free steven is, but how can either of them compare their lives to each other? the similarities just arent there. steven is right, greg and pink were “raised” in very similar “households”. both had their wishes and desires suppressed by controlling, abusive parents. we know pink was abused mentally, verbally and physically (being physically dragged away from the screen by yellow in jungle moon, stevonnie being grabbed and thrown into the time out cell by yellow, when she still thought steven was pink), but greg at the very least was mentally assaulted. but they diverge from here. as greg said, he thought disco was back. rose started a war. you cant compare them any further. 
but at the same time, steven was raised completely differently. he was raised in a home with love and freedom, but he was also not given the opportunity to be a normal kid. theres a difference being forcing your kid to do something and not giving them the chance to try something. steven was never given the option to go to school (well in the comics he was but i guess thats not canon now since it seems like steven wishes he went to school?) he was never given the option to live in a house, or go to the mall with friends. the only other kids he knew were the boardwalk kids, but even then, he doesnt seem very close with them. for such an outgoing, friendly kid, steven wasnt given many opportunities to make friends. steven’s upbringing was very relaxed, yes, but it was too relaxed. he needed more structure, and more importantly, more humanity. i always thought it was weird, how little steven seems to have interacted with humans before connie, considering that his mother so desperately wanted steven to experience being human. yes the show is about gems, (and yes, i dont like most townie episodes), but steven was never shown doing a lot of “human” kid things inbetween episodes. the episode never started with him coming home from a friends house, he hardly ever spent time with friends other than connie in little scenes. like he was never called for a mission while playing cards with peedee, or coming home after an after school activity. any scenes like that were either just steven by himself, or with greg, and occasionally connie. but connie is a new addition to his life. how many years has he been doing fun stuff with only his dad for company, or by himself? yknow, “non traditional” childhoods and living situations are becoming more and more common in media, rather than the “two parents in a suburb house” thing, but steven’s life is beyond any unusual childhood any other kid would have. i mean he’s never even been to the doctor! which is probably for several reasons, like the fact that he apparently doesnt have a ssn, he can heal himself, has a damn gemstone in his stomach, and is half alien. but still, thats not something he has in common with other kids. no matter how much love and freedom he was given, steven was raised as an outcast.
i agree with the notion that both greg and steven were both right and wrong in mr universe. i guess they both have that in common with rose lol 
greg should have read the room better, realized that his pep talk wasnt the support and apology steven needed to hear. but steven shouldnt have acted out in the way he did. i get that’s the “theme” of steven’s spiral, maybe for the younger audience to better understand how steven is acting? but crashing his dad’s van that gregs been living in for like 20 years? fucking SHATTERING jasper? that’s going way too far to prove a point. it would have been better to maybe mirror story for steven, where marty and greg are arguing, marty is watching the road and they narrowly avoid hitting a car. but crashing the car could have been pretty serious, especially for greg. now jasper, that episode shouldnt have been approved. steven should not have shattered jasper. he fucking killed her. rose/pink didnt even shatter anyone. and if it wasnt for steven getting another superpower out of nowhere, jasper would have stayed that way. he should have just cracked her gem, poofing her in the process. the rest of the episode wouldve played out exactly the same.
anyways ive been writing this for like 2 hours but i feel better letting it all out. if you enjoy future keep enjoying it! it’s definitely more like a B+ compared to season 3-5′s general C-/D+. but please take into consideration future has some themes that people personally relate to, like mental health, and that you shouldnt shit on someone elses opinions that are based on their own personal experiences. especially if you dont have mental health issues, dont keep pushing your opinion and telling people that personally relate to future’s themes that they’re wrong? thats fucked up man
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monohart · 5 years ago
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clouds. (college!au)
ft. mark lee, sunny days and the brink of adolescence.
dating the campus’ radio dj was not an easy job
he was always, always busy, especially in the evenings.
he was exempted from 2/3 of his classes this semester to fit in broadcasting sessions and also to mentor the new broadcasters.
apparently they recruited a freshman, jisung. but he was a shy little bean, and mark needed to spend a lot more hours mentoring him.
which kinda meant that you would spend less time with your boyfriend
thankfully, y’all had similar classes.
there was this one class which was a capstone subject
which meant if u want to graduate u HAD to take it lol
and he aced all of the assessments in that subject so far this year
but you were just a bit competitive, so with exams coming, you planned to score a higher grade than him
which.. was an easy job, right? he spent most of his nights hosting the radio show anyway.
it both bugged and made you so extremely proud that mark was already getting proper job offers from major broadcasting channels
like when he got his first offer, he actually just finished a broadcast at around 3am, and was on the way back home
but he read the email on his phone and took a detour to your apartment
which scared the sh*t out of you
mark its almost 4am you could’ve just sent me a text??
“i don’t care i just needed to tell you this in person, oh my goodness is this even real????”
idk mark you tell me???
it was real, because he started getting offer after offer in the following week
but thankfully he didn’t pop by your place in the middle of the night again, after that first time
because you actually let him stay over that night and -
he held you in his arms as he leant against your headboard
and you just used him as a pillow because he you made him take a quick shower and he smelt of your soap but he still smelled of him and it was a comforting scent which sent you off the dreamland real quick
and he actually watched you fall asleep and made sure you were asleep before he pulled out his laptop to work on an assignment that was due the next day
when you woke up the next morning, you felt something cold and hard prod your back and you panicked for a moment before realising it was his laptop
and you heard the shower running so you knew it was mark going through his morning routine
but then you thought.... did he even sleep?
when he hopped out of the bathroom clad in same the clothes he wore the night before, he was still drying his hair with a towel
and his face was strew with exhaustion
but as soon as he saw you sitting groggily on the edge of your bed, his face lit up and he strode over to kiss the top of your head
“mark, did you even sleep?”
“nope, but i’m off again, i’ve got to hand in my assignment! i’ll see you for lunch?”
“wait what assignment?? did you need help on it?”
“nope, i got it done last night! thanks for letting me crash.”
before you could stop him, he pressed a hasty kiss on your lips before grabbing his laptop and bag and rushed out the door
and you sigh because
this was how dating mark lee, the campus dj, was like.
anyway
now, you guys were just a few days away from finishing the semester’s classes
and this was your last semester... given if you’ll pass the exams lol
so it was kinda the last few days you’d be able to spend together, on campus.
summer was coming
and the sun was so bright these days, it cleared the skies
no rain, none at all
which was not entirely Great because rainy days helped you study... and rainy days also meant more people tuned in on the campus radio
which meant
mark was kinda jobless today
which ALSO meant!!!
you could finally spend a whole day with him.
but, oh man...
when he called you around 11pm the night before, he was also checking his email and ... accidentally forgot that he had another assignment due at 8am the following morning
guess who didn’t get any sleep at all again!!!
your heart hurt seeing him work so hard
but somehow he convinced you to go to sleep first and not stay up to help him
he still got the assignment in on time because hes mark lee
so when you guys sat on the lawn in the middle of campus just like any typical college couple would on a nice sunny day, mark lay his head on your lap and used one of your textbooks to shield his eyes from the sun
and you were using his laptop to compile your notes from the semester, and also to help him tidy up his
“hey baby...?”
“hmm?”
you waited for mark to continue his sentence but he went silent
“mark, what?”
“mark-”
you lifted your textbook from his face only to find that he had fallen asleep.
his lips were slightly parted and he was snoring really quietly, and his fingers were in loose fists as they rested on his belly.
dont deny but you busted the biggest uwu didnt you
ofc like
you couldn’t possibly waste this precious photo opportunity but
your phone was just slightly out of reach rip
so when you grappled for it, mark woke up in an instant
he sat up real quick, and a tuft of his hair was sticking up messily.
“oh no, i didnt mean to-”
“so d’you wonder why we’re all clouds?”
you stared at each other with equally as confused frowns lol
like mark was actually
hella confused
but your expression literally read wtf
he didn’t really notice but instead yawned and held his arm out to you
and you move closer to him, snuggling into his side as he slowly lays the both of you down again, in a way so you could use his arm as a pillow.
the sun was really really bright so y’all lay there with your eyes squished shut
“we’re all just clouds, aren’t we?”
his serious question was met by your quiet scoff
“no, no, i’m for real. y’know how everything we do are for exams. exams this, assignments that... gpa... scores.. grades... deadlines... those kinda things. they turn us into clouds.”
“that is one extremely weird way to describe college students, mark.”
“no, baby, but... it’s accurate, isn’t it? the anxiety, stress, exhaustion... and just about everything we do turn us all into little clouds.”
“do elaborate, cause i don’t get why you’re comparing us to condensed water vapour.”
mark chuckled a little, and you roll your eyes figuratively, keeping your eyes tightly shut to shield it from the unforgiving sun.
"actually, never mind, it sounded way better in my head.”
at that point you were getting up to lie on your side
he turned his head and squinted at you as you gently placed a hand on his chest
"are you writing lyrics again?”
he hummed quietly and you shift a few inches closer to him.
“show me. i want to read those lyrics, no matter how dumb you think they are.”
“they’re not ready yet.”
“if you’re writing about anxiety, i can be your muse.”
“no way, you’re not a cloud. you’re a sunflower.”
he wrote lyrics all the time and most of the time he’d write them about you
sometimes he’d let you read them, sometimes he kept them to himself
and you’d catch him grinning idiotically over some lyric he wrote some time ago
so when he goes to sleep you would sneak a peak at it and it’s basically a love letter to first-date-you, or a diary entry of how he feels every time he sends u home from a date or from school but its so dreamy and seems unreal but you kNOW ITS REAL!!
bc u were there!!
anyway 
idk what came over you but you slung an arm around his torso and rested your head against his shoulder and he let out a quiet little puff of breath
you would think he’s pretty ok with skinship since y’all been together for so long
but yeah it was chill and okay and he’d be super clingy at home but when y’all were in public
man,,, he got so flustered and nervous
u just wanted to cuddle lol but he suddenly turned into a robot
the sun made everything seem slow and warm and sluggish which was pretty okay with you because you were finally spending time with mark!!!
and he was soft and squishy and a little bit awkward but so so so cute so u rly just wanted the moment to last longer
but no
just as u were about to drift off a Shadow™ loomed over u both
mark probably fell asleep again tbh
u heard a rly loud camera go CLICK and distinct voices whisper-yelling at each other
and there was a struggle
and the struggle ended with a Butt falling onto mark’s other shoulder
“MARK IM SO SORRY RENJUN PUSHED ME”
“NO YOU STINK YOU FELL BY YOURSELF”
“oh hey guys shut up the photo turned out alright”
“JENO SHUT UP THEY’RE RIGHT THERE”
mark was sitting up and you fussed over his other shoulder which was attacked by jaemin’s butt
and although he was so .. unfortunately.. woken up from his nap he was grinning and squinting up at his squabbling friends
and he chuckled as he watched u stand up and wrestle jeno for his phone to see the Photo
he was watching you chase chenle and renjun around the lawn, the two boys purposefully running slower to tease u
donghyuck sat down next to mark and put his head on his shoulder to mimic you from a few minutes ago
“oh you’re disgusting please go away.”
hyuck turned his head and batted his eyelashes up at mark who was still watching u with a dreamy smile
“you’re leaving soon, we just wanted to spend time with you before u abandon us”
mark laughed and told him he’s only graduating
but hyuck scowled and nudged mark with his elbow then gestured in your direction
“but you spend more time with her nowadays than you do with us”
mark let out a loud laugh and shook his head
“she’s my girlfriend.”
“so?”
“she’s my lover.”
“so??”
“she’s... everything to me.”
jisung, who was listening, gagged and haechan slapped mark’s tummy while hollering
and then u look over at them from the other side of the lawn, wondering why mark was lying on the floor again and why the other dreamies were surrounding him in a cultish circle
jeno and jaemin turned to face you with big chummy smiles on their faces and together they made heart arms at u
some other people on the lawn were beginning to stare and so u hide behind chenle bc renjun is too tiny
then jisung must’ve texted their group chat because renjun cackles and leads you back to the group
and u notice how bright mark’s face was which makes u blush like crazy as well
and even though stress from school, work and everything in general, was making u feel like a big and heavy raincloud
one look at mark lee made u feel like sunflowers and daisies
it totally didn’t help that when he’d look at you, the corners of his eyes would crinkle ever so slightly, and his eyes would shine with genuine adoration
and his cute little lips would stretch into the widest grin
uwu
and u bet the next batch of lyrics he gonna write is gonna be about you again!!
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lavenderlattaes · 5 years ago
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pink sticky note. | kim taehyung
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⇒ summary: maybe all you ever really needed to get through a tiring day was a pink sticky note, a janitor’s closet, and a certain boyfriend named Kim Taehyung.
⇒ [high school! au]
⇒ pairing: kim taehyung x reader
⇒ word count: 2.3k words
⇒ genre: fluff
⇒ warnings: the cliché making out in a janitor’s closet lmao
⇒ note: hello, this has been sitting in my docs for weeks now, i almost forgot about it lol. ignore mistakes bc im a bit of a blind bat and enjoy! \ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ/
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You moved from room to room, checking in with the class Presidents, giving instructions and answering questions from the teachers with a tired smile on your face. The school’s biggest event — which was the school’s foundation anniversary — was set to happen in a week, and you were running around, getting things done before Friday rolled around.
It was currently 8:15 am on a Monday and while you would much rather want to be in class, listening to your teacher talk about the history of the Joseon Dynasty, you couldn’t. You were the student council President, and along with the rest of the student council, you were all completing your assigned tasks for the event.
“Hey, Y/N, I came to check on the banners at the gymnasium, and Mr. Jung just told me it isn’t set to arrive until Thursday.” Your Vice President, Park Jimin runs up to you, slightly out of breath, his pink hair flopping messily.
You sigh and open your clipboard that was clutched tightly in your left arm, running your index finger over the program. You click the top of your sign pen and scribble a few notes beside the stage setup design. You close the clipboard and look up at Jimin.
“That’s okay, we can stay until after school to work on it. Tell Jeongguk to gather his committee after classes on Thursday to set the stage up. I’ll go inform Jihyo to prepare the letter for it.” You inform Jimin, sending him a slightly tired but positive smile.
“Preferably around what time? Classes end at 3:30 for the seniors,” Jimin replies. “Then can we start working on it by 3:45? They can have a quick break then start on it until around 7, maybe?” You ask, and Jimin nods.
Jimin was your best friend before he was your Vice President so he sends one back and steps closer to you, wrapping you in a tight hug in the middle of the hallway.
“We can get through this, Y/N. Don’t stress out on it too much,” Jimin whispers, stroking your hair gently. You hum and rub your hands up and down his back comfortingly. You both needed that extra comfort.
“Thanks, Jimin. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
He pulls away from the hug, holding you at arm’s length as he smirks.
“You’d probably still be single.” He winks and you laugh at him, bidding each other good bye before he dashes off in the opposite direction.
Immediately your thoughts drift off to your boyfriend as Jimin turns around the corner and disappears. You smile and head on over to your locker to get your journal where you wrote down all your important appointments and things to do.
On your way there, your Treasurer, Nayeon stops you.
“Y/N! I just came from the accounting office and they just told me they can’t release the funds today, we’ll have to wait until Tuesday afternoon,” Nayeon informs you, sighing.
You frown and run a hand through your hair. “But, why? I thought everything was already settled.”
“That’s what I thought too, but apparently they don’t hand out the funds on Mondays,” Nayeon rolls her eyes.
You sigh tiredly. “Sometimes, I really hate this school.” You groan and Nayeon just laughs, soon making you laugh along with her. As much as you want to thrash around, there’s nothing you can do since the school’s pretty firm when it comes to their conditions.
“So what will we do about this?” Nayeon asks, going back to business mode.
You purse your lips in thought before nodding. “We’ll just use whatever funds we have for now, we can have it reimbursed later on,” you answer and Nayeon nods.
She steps closer and gives you a hug. “I have to go make a few calls with the booths that’ll be setting up next week. I’ll see you around, Y/N!” Nayeon runs off again and you shout out a ‘bye!’ after her.
You turn around and continue your walk to your locker, immediately punching your code in tiredly. You sigh and get your journal out, when a bright pink sticky note catches your eye on the front cover.
You scrunch your eyebrows in confusion because you don’t remember putting it there the day before or earlier at all. You only usually did that when you have urgent matters to attend to and you’re in a rush that you don’t have time to open your journal.
A confused smile makes its way onto your face when you read the handwriting and realize it’s not yours. It’s your boyfriend’s.
hit me up when you’re free, i need to see ü. luv u babe(๑・̑◡・̑๑)
You giggle at the cute drawing, closing your locker shut. You take your phone out from the coat pocket of your uniform. You check the time and it’s only 8:30 am.
While you’d much rather go see your boyfriend, you still had to put the school over him right now. Taehyung can wait.
You check your clipboard and cross out the things you’ve already done. You still have a lot left to do. You take a quick glance at your phone lockscreen— it was a dorky pic of you and Taehyung when you first got together last year. Instantly, you’re filled with motivation and tell yourself to push through the entire day.
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The hours fly by quickly and before you know it, it’s already around 3:30 pm. Most of your tasks for the day were done, and you only had an hour before school lets out.
You look down and see Taehyung’s sticky note still on the front cover of your journal. Scanning through your notes, you notice that you loaded yourself with too much tasks — some of it could’ve waited until tomorrow. Biting your lip, you decide to be a little bit selfish today.
You drop your stuff inside your locker and without a second thought — just so you don’t change your mind anymore, you take your phone out again and type out a message to Taehyung.
You: heeeey, I just finished my to-do list for today. Can we meet up? :3
Not long after you hit send, your phone beeps with Taehyung’s message.
my vantae♡: sure, im just developing a few more photos. im in the dark room :))
You: omw <3
my vantae♡: luv uuuuu
You: luv u too !
“You guys are so cheesy,” Jimin slings an arm around your shoulders and your throw your head back as you give him a side glance, glaring at him. Jimin pulls you with him and you start walking to the dark room.
“Oh shush, you’re the reason why we’re even together,” you jab his side with your finger and a laugh escapes from the adorable male beside you.
“So what are you lovebirds up to?” Jimin walks with you, looking over your shoulder to criticize your texts with Taehyung.
“I’m going to meet up with him in the dark room,” you lock your phone and put it back in your pocket as Jimin wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
“Dark room, eh?” You bump your hip with his, catching him off guard with the force and making him stumble to the side, momentarily bringing you along with him. You groan at your best friend’s antics and he just laughs at your reaction.
“He probably wants me to take a look at the photos for the event next week,” you reason and Jimin nods, a weird look on his to tell you that he’s clearly unconvinced.
“I know Taehyung, Y/N. But, okay sure. I’ll leave you guys to it. I have to go meet up with the hyungs. I need to confirm their setlist for next week,” Jimin tells you.
Jimin was talking about the legendary alumni of your school — Kim Seokjin, Min Yoongi, Jung Hoseok and Kim Namjoon. They were fairly huge now with their music, and you wanted to invite them back for the anniversary.
“Okay, let me know how it goes.” You smile at your best friend and Jimin gives you a side hug.
“Say hi to Taehyung for me!” Jimin dashes off, again, and you shake your head, smiling.
You continue your trip to the dark room, looking down at your uniform as you tried to smooth out the creases that got all crumpled up with you running around all day. You fix your blouse and in the middle of tucking it in nicely, someone pulls you to the side.
Suddenly all you can see is darkness and —
“Taehyung?” Your eyes adjust to the dark room and you can faintly smell dust in the air, making you realize where you were: in the janitor’s closet.
How cliché.
“Hey, Y/N,” his deep, playful voice fills your ears and a smile creeps up your face.
“I missed you all day,” you lean into him and you take in his musky scent and the warmth of his body. Taehyung wraps his arms around you in a tight hug and all the stress and exhaustion from the day’s activities leave your body in an instant.
“Well, you were busy and I didn’t want to interrupt you and add to your stress,” Taehyung answers, kissing the top of your head.
Guilt washes over you and you pull away from the hug to look at him. Well, try to.
You cup his cheek and he immediately leans in to your touch, gazing at you with such an intensity you’re scared to look away.
“I’m sorry for being such a bad girlfriend lately. I’ve been neglecting you for the past two weeks now,” you apologize, rubbing his cheek with your thumb gently.
“It’s okay, Y/N. I understand.” Taehyung smiles at you and he leans in, kissing you softly.
You respond to the kiss beforing answering, “No, listen, Tae. I should’ve given you more attention, I should’ve—”
He cuts you off with another kiss, longer this time and with more force. You can never resist Taehyung’s kisses, and soon your arms are crawling up his chest, where they soon rest on his shoulders.
When you both pull away, you’re out of breath. You try to make out your boyfriend’s face in the dark room; even in this darkness, you can still trace the curve of his jaw, the slope of his nose, the curl of his eyelashes, and the oh, so perfect shape of his lips.
Without another word, Taehyung leans in again, knocking the wind out of your lungs when he presses his lips to yours in a needy kiss. Your hands come to connect behind the nape of his neck, loosely playing with the ends of his hair. Taehyung moves impossibly closer to you, pressing you against the door, trapping you with his arms on both sides of your head. His right leg pushes in between your legs so he can move closer.
Detaching his lips from yours, he makes his way down to your jaw, then to your neck where he presses feather-like kisses all over.
Your hands move up to his hair, and you soon feel Taehyung mark a spot just below your collarbone.
“Tae, people are gonna see,” you manage to let out, and he shakes his head, tickling your skin as he continues to kiss you. “It’s covered underneath your blouse and coat,” Taehyung murmurs and you can just sigh.
When he’s done, Taehyung goes back up and captures your lips in another kiss, nibbling your lower lip softly, asking for access. You give in, and your legs soon start to feel like jelly. Before your legs can give out underneath you, Taehyung wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you flush against him.
The room is dark, but with you in Taehyung’s arms like that, it’s never been so vibrant.
When he finally pulls away, you’re both breathing heavily. Licking your bruised lips, you ask, “What was that for?”
Taehyung cups your face with both hands, stroking the apples of your cheeks gently as he gazed down at you.
“I just missed you, that’s all,” he replies simply, and you smile at him. He smiles back.
“I’m sorry for being so busy, I just wanted everything to be perfect for the event,” you apologize yet again and Taehyung shakes his head.
“I understand, love. There’s no need for you to explain. You shouldn’t even be in this closet with me right now, yeah? You should be out there, doing stuff for the event,” Taehyung remarks and this time, it’s your turn to shake your head.
You stand up on your toes and plant a soft kiss on the tip of his nose.
“That can wait. Right now, I’m going to put the guy I love first.”
Taehyung giggles softly, kissing every spot on your face, making you smile. “Jimin’s going to tease you if he hears you.”
“He’s been teasing me since this morning,” you respond and Taehyung nuzzles his nose with yours.
“But I’m cool with it because if it weren’t for him, I wouldn’t be here with you,” you confess and Taehyung kisses you gently.
“I love you, my President.”
You give him a gentle smile and stepping away from you, Taehyung takes your hand in his, lacing your fingers together.
“Come on. As much as I love being here in this closet with you, it’s starting to tickle my nose,” he admits, making you giggle.
“Oh yeah, why are we here? Weren’t you supposed to be printing out some photos in the dark room?” You ask and Taehyung laughs sheepishly.
“I was done an hour ago.”
You slap his shoulder and he laughs. “Tae! Jimin knew this was going to happen,” you mutter.
“Well, that just proves he knows me too well,” Taehyung responds and you shake your head fondly, smiling at him.
“Let’s go get some ice cream, yeah?” You rub his knuckles softly.
Taehyung’s boxy smile graces his features. “I’m fine with anything, as long as it’s with you.”
Taehyung opens the door and light fills your eyes when you both step out.
“You’re cheesy, Kim Taehyung.”
“I know.”
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⇒ let me know what you think or hmu with anything under the sun here!
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ditto · 4 years ago
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wi rehab week 3 review: the Week™. i KNOW this post is long but god please read about my misfortune if yall want a Saga
current status on raccoons: clement
number of monster energy drinks consumed: 2
number of buns directly killed: 1
Days Since Last Diarrhead on: 1
Baby Raccoon Count: 150ish? probably 130 that need to be bottle fed 
new tasks performed:
baby opossum cage maintenance
baby waterfowl cage maintenance
SQ fluid administration on raccoons
SQ vaccine administration on raccoons
What To Do When Your Tire Goes Flat 101
oral medication administration on possums
CHRONOLOGICAL TALE OF MISFORTUNE: i’m not going to do this regularly but the sheer amount of bad shit that happened this week was COMICAL so let me break down everything that happened to me this work week
MONDAY 6/8
got diarrhead on during 6am raccoon feeding
straight up killed a baby rabbit during bun feeding. they stress real easily and i’m bad at tubing so i had him out for a while and he just fuckin. died. from stress. in my hands. directly because of me being bad at my job. so you know that was uhhhhhhhhhhhhh
shovelled out wet dirty woodchips out of a walk-in enclosure with like 8 goslings using a snowshovel w/ another baby intern. you can’t put a ton of woodchips into one trash bag so we had to keep changing out the trash bag and it was like 92 degrees out and we were both wearing cloth masks and on god i really thought we were gonna die in there
during the pm feeding i get peed on by the EXACT SAME RACCOON that diarrhead on me during the am feeding 
TUESDAY 6/9: the Day(tm)
i have a therapy appointment scheduled at 2pm. my shift is 6am-2pm. i’ll need to leave at 1:30pm to get to it. i tell my supervisors this. it’s chill. i still feel bad about it, because i have anxiety.
right off the bat, i get scolded by my Actual Boss for doing something i watched one of the supervising interns do 
6am raccoon feeding: get diarrhead on again. 
a rac RIPS the fucking nipple off of the baby bottle we’re feeding them with and formula gets fucking everywhere. i say out loud at this moment “IM HAVING A GREAT WEEK”. one of my supervising interns feels bad for me and keeps trying to cheer me up throughout the day. she does make me feel better.
i get dishes which is fine bc i dont mind dishes for real but my hands turn into sandpaper the day after doing dishes for 2 hours so this is more :| than :/. i make jokes about how bad my week is going. the mood is, generally, looking up.
next raccoon feeding is scheduled for noon. raccoons are housed in a separate building, so it’s about a 5 minute drive to get there from the main area. we get ready to leave around 1pm. recap: i need to leave at 1:30pm for a therapy appointment. i’m planning on driving my own car down there so i can do this. it’s chill.
on my way down there, i start hearing the most godawful screeching of metal. i am, quote, “like uhhh.” when i open the gate to turn onto the highway, i stick my head out the window to look
my tire is flat.
i have a flat tire.
my fucking tire is FLAT dude.
>mfw
>
>
pull over after gate
tell the staff member following me “hey i have a flat tire so im probably not going to make it down to feed today” and shes like flkdjsalfksd okay
call the ONE supervising intern whose number i have, who is the one who heard me say IM HAVING A GREAT WEEK, like GUESS WHICH BITCH HAS A FLAT TIRE LMFAOOOOOOO. just making that one call was the funniest fucking thing that’s ever happened in my entire life
to quote her verbatim: “i guess you are having a bad week”
call my dad, who as it turns out was actively teaching a class when i called, so i am well and truly facked and am DEFINITELY not making this therapy appointment
ok. take a deep breath. check my car. i have a donut in my car. i have not changed a tire in three years, and have never changed one in the scenario of I Have A Flat Tire. fack. relay this to the one supervising intern whos number i know (i’m going to call her supervising intern 1 going forward here). ask her if anyone knows how to change a tire. 
supervising intern 1 calls back. apparently there’s a guy who lives on the same property we’re on named donnie. donnie is a maintenance worker who helps out a lot around the rehab place. donnie can help me change my tire. apparently someone currently down feeding raccoons is going to come pick me up and bring me over there so i can continue to feed raccoons until donnie can fix my tire. 
get call from supervising intern 2, whose number i did not have, apparently it got relayed. i ask her if anyone down there can change a tire. she says she can change a tire. she will help me change my tire she finishes on raccoon feeding. ok sounds good. someone is still going to come pick me up.
get call back 10 minutes later. apparently donnie is in the middle of a field right now and it is unlikely that he can fix my tire. someone is still going to come get me to feed raccoons, maybe. i tell her supervising intern 2 can help me change my tire after we finish our shift. she says thats fine. ok cool sick.
try to call therapist. i have no signal. send email which is, verbatim: “Hey! I'm currently on the the side of of the the road in [TOWN 30 MILES AWAY] with a flat tire, so I'm not going to make our appointment today. If we could reschedule for sometime soon, that would be great.” signal is bad, so this ends up being sent at 3pm.
(ALSO I LEARNED ABOUT THIS TODAY BUT APPARENTLY IN THE TIMELINE THERE’S A FIGHT HERE BETWEEN SUPERVISING INTERNS 1 AND 2 OVER HOW THE SITUATION IS PLAYING OUT WHICH IS EQUAL PARTS HILARIOUS AND “MAKES ME FEEL BAD”)
one of the other baby interns comes to pick me up and bring me down to racs. i walk in like AYYYYYYY and start feeding raccoons.
i get diarrhead on again.
i get diarrhead on again again. 
apparently 3 in one day is a record.
my shift is supposed to end at 2pm. we usually end up staying until 2:15-2:30ish, because that’s usually when the other team gets down here. since supervising intern 2 is currently my savior, she is going to drive me back over when the other team gets here and she leaves. other baby interns leave at 2:15ish, i think. 
the other team is, apparently, running late. they get here at 3pm.
supervising intern 2 drives me back over at 3pm. we get to my car.
the donut is on.
the tire is in the trunk.
apparently donnie was, in fact, able to come change my tire. no one told me this. 
im like ok. this is fine. i tell supervising intern 2 thank u for my life. i leave.
my donut has a 50mph max speed limit. i tell google maps to avoid highways on my way home. this turns my 30 minute drive home into a 50 minute one, and still ends up with me being terrifyingly tailgated by trucks for going 10 miles under the speed limit. i almost, but do not, run out of gas on the way home.
i get home around 4:10pm. i call the auto shop across the street from me and tell them i have a flat tire, but i need the car by 6am tomorrow. do they think they can have it fixed by then. they tell me to bring it over and they’ll let me know.
i bring the car over. i give them my keys. i say thank you and leave.
i realize that my garage door opener is in my car, which is now locked. i have no other way into the house, because our garage door keypad has been broken for 2 years. the sliding glass door in the backyard is locked.
i walk back into the auto shop 5 minutes later and ask in the Polite But Obviously Having A Day tone if i can have my keys back so i can get it. i get my garage door opener out of my car. i give the keys back.
i enter my home. i lay spread-eagled on my bed for one hour.
auto place calls back and tells me they fixed the tire. im like did you replace it or did u fix it. theyre like we fixed it come on over. i almost cry on the phone.
go back over. guy is like “ya u ran over a screw LOL”. gives me my keys back. i wait to pay
after a bit hes like “you dont have to pay anything. this is on the house.”
almost cry
thank him
get car
go home
eat
shower
go to bed at 8pm 
WEDNESDAY (6/10)
everyone at work is immediately like AYYY and in general just very nice about the whole thing. i thank everyone involved for helping. its chill
dont get diarrhead on this feeding but i do get bit for like NO got dam reason what the fack
next up is cleaning juvenile cages and i swear to god i get the nastiest. fucking. raccoon cage i have ever seen in my entire life. there was an...i wanna say eigth-of-an-inch thick layer of raccoon diarrhea across this 2 foot x 4 foot cage
like on GOD the smell was so bad i was gagging through a goddamn cloth mask just. oh my god. i had to just go stand outside and stare into the abyss afterwards for a few minutes it was so NASTY IT WAS SO NASTY
mercifully, i am spared from further misfortune for the rest of the day. i come home. i am so tired.
WAIT I HAVE TO MENTION THAT SUPERVISING INTERN 1 HAD SUCH BAD LUCK FEEDING RABBITS TODAY SO LIKE...my luck is contagious 
notes and observations
anyone who is anti-euthanasia in animal shelters and any other large-scale animal welfare places in general can absolutely suck my dick
most other baby animals will generally have various stages of “baby x”, but opossums look like Adults Except Tiny from a very early age. they have stolen my heart.
birds are poopy little creatures
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