#prev tags bc i am not adding much to this!!

[brick-van-dyke]

This, plus I'd argue that it often leads to being treated as trans women as well and being subjected to parts of transmisogyny, it's why I don't really think the whole TME and TMA thing really works very well in actually identifying transphobia because of how often we're all grouped together as either "lying men pretending to be women" or "lying men pretending to be women and lying about being female to male transgenders", or just "you don't look like either so you must be a male" or some other brand of transphobia and intersexism as well mixed in.

Tbh actually I think that's kind of the point. There's so much intersexism and sexism in general that goes into the whole idea behind "all those who don't conform to gender roles and are their assigned sex are automatically trans women" in terms of grouping us all together as a monolithic entity. "You can't be a happy trans man, so you must be a trans woman" and "it's only when you're unhappy that you're a trans man who's a victim that we must save". Like that in and of itself is kind of the point with transphobia. We can't exist because we undermine the idea that "the issue of transness is trans women so trans men and intersex people are all trans women by default, unless they are sad or traumatised in any sort of way because then they're victims of trans women". It's only ever one or the other, and that always changes he idenity you're perceived as because the only "real" ftm in existence are "victims" they have been able to label as 'detrans victims of the transgender cult". If you're not, you don't exist; you're not supposed to exist. So you "must" be a trans woman, that's the "only" explanation for your being here. So they treat you as that because anything else is a lie.

A lot of the times I've been called transphobic bs on the street or online, or treated like shit in an institutional setting like a hospital, it typically starts off with assuming I'm a pre-transition trans woman and start treating me with either microagressions meant towards trans women or explicitly start calling me things like "a creepy man pretending to have a girl's name", and then when I say I'm a trans man they either deny the fact I'm a trans man or insist that's another word for "trans woman" because that ruins their transmisogynistic world view of "all trans women look like men" and "trans men don't exist" or "are broken women so they can't look like men", and I don't look like a frail, broken down victim to them, so I "must be" the former.

"Trans men benifit from invisibility", actually we suffer from the intentional erasure of our identities, history, and culture. An erasure, that is violently enforced through the constant assault, rape, and community isolation that we have to endure silently (because if we speak up we are further punished, further pushed out of communities, and silenced harder).

[lastoneout]

Like yeah it has been kinda wild to see tumblr's attitude about comments and reblogs change so much and tbh a lot of it I don't think can even entirely be chalked up to tiktok or twitter users cuz in the 11 years I've used this site we have gone from:

- Early 2010s tumblr where we added stuff to reblogs all the time, no one cared, posts can got so long they glitched your dash and we basically legit has to scroll uphill in the snow both ways to reblog anything bcs the buttons were at the TOP of the post

- To tumblr fixing posts so the reblog/like buttons were at the bottom(which we loved) and made it so reblogs didn't glitch your dash(which we all complained about) but that also made posts Longer which created the era of "sorry my follower added that dumb comment to your post" and "I had to go back x reblogs to find a version of the post without these pointless comments" jokes

- Which then lead into the era of "how dare you leave this in the tags" which tbh felt like a huge correction from the pervious mentality bcs we convinced everyone that adding comments to posts was Bad and so we missed good additions and interactions to the point that screencaping good tags and adding them quickly became common practice

- And around that same time we started seeing people just straight up reblog posts less which has been an ongoing problem

- And then we got into the whole "prev tags" thing where people legit didn't even want to screencap tags anymore for fear of being impolite and causing us to again have to hammer it into people's heads that You Are Supposed To Interact With Posts

- Only for us now to have a site wide epidemic of people who just don't reblog stuff at all which has built on the previous shift and now driven home by users from other sites who just don't get how tumblr works and (mostly) refuse to learn

So yeah, the attitude around it has changed so much and it's honestly kinda fascinating to watch. And I mean I am not trying to get on a high horse but tbh I always hated the "sorry my follower added a dumb comment" jokes because it DID drill it into people's heads that interacting was bad and I think everything after has been us trying to fix the damage that did, which isn't helped again by people from tiktok and twitter who think rebloging things is Wrong for some reason.

Anyway that to say please interact with posts, no one really cares if your comment is bad/un-needed/whatever because the unique humor of tumblr is built on a giant game of "yes, and" and when you refuse to reblog or comment or even so much as screencap funny tags we lose a lot of what makes this site great.

Put yourself out there, comment on the post or in the tags, screencap funny tags and add them, interact with people, share posts so people will SEE them, and especially reblog posts by artists and writers to support their content!! If you feel bad spamming people's dashes just put stuff in your queue so it gets spaced out or just don't care bcs that's how tumblr works and if you don't like that you can just unfollow someone or leave for another website that does work the way you want it to. It's that easy.

[shatterthefragments]

🌻

SO I sorta play/am relearning to play the flute and (tenor sax),

Treble clef to read: my beloved. Not quite as used to the bass clef but I *can* given enough time

And I have a midi keyboard that I may have mistaken for being able to ALSO be a keyboard oops but at least it was super cheap when I got it 😅 and I have *access* to a trumpet if I so wanted bc the sister played in middle school (cost of buying the cheapest instrument < the cost of renting even just for three years in middle school)

And I’ve always had an obsession with the cello and wanted to play SO hopefully I’ll be able to make space for and save enough money to buy one used and though I HIGHLY doubt it would be in time (especially given I’d probably need to road trip to get it) …or if one of the music stores has an absolutely ridiculous sale… that’s also an option 👀

Buuut given I can’t really remember how to hold a bow properly and tbh was Not very good at it anyway (but hey I only had one free 30 minute lesson that was SUPPOSED to be for the flute to develop skills further in concert band) I’d need actual lessons and probably couldn’t jsut learn on YouTube but the near city has adult basic cello classes!!

But given that maybe bass or guitar would be better first?? But I don’t know if my fingers can reach across the fretboard?? I couldn’t really when I played guitar in my hotel suite I got upgraded to (…I should. Post to my personal social media at some point bc they probably upgraded me bc I’m young and they figured I would) but it’s still super fun!!

Or like. I know I can finger the ukulele bc I played in third grade but it broke so I can’t anymore but back then it was maaaaybe $40 and I fear it would be twice that (ah yeah they are. Also I don’t remember how to play at all) (and ukulele basses are even more expensive)

Buuut I also need to brush up on my theory and tbh bc I play wind, I have no idea about Chord theory or progrsssions. So maybe learning in a keyboard (which are fairly cheap in marketplace but I just. Have a Lot of mini trips coming up… so I should not by any means. Especially if I also want to get more tattoos in the fall) also I kinda want an alto sax too since fingerings translate

So I can’t really decide what to do next (“get good at your current instruments shatters!!”) also I lost the tenor sax mouthpiece after I washed it so I could hopefully start playing again but in sure it’s kicking around in the kitchen somewhere (tbh I’ll need to wash it again if it is though)

Also considered drums bc Ekits are quieter however I have no space (my sax is currently in the sis’ room 😭) and then booked a trip instead :P

And like?? I need to figure out which daw (preferably free) I can use to record stuff~

Ah I should probably get a mic at some point but I’m hoping my phone or earbuds will do the job for me tbh haha

Wanting to maybe fiddle around with a few covers (prev just Kingdom of Cards but gosh there are SO MANY GOOD SONGS less that I am capable of singing - fuck knows I can’t actually sing the way they do and my range is Limited but 🤷🏻 if I’m having a good time it’s all good hey)

And then eventually make one of my songs (which. Let’s be honest. Many old lyric papers I recycled now. And I still can’t get in to so many of my locked notes in the notes app so I have to most likely come up with something new or newish but that’s ok what else are emotions for but vent poetry amiright??

Also the ads for nocturnal bass are wearing me down but it’s too expensive when I have no clue what I’m doing yet. I have a bunch of free sounds loops and resources already… as long as I can Actually access them on a portable drive bc my laptop has no space and I need to delete so much off it already tbh

And I know it’s not a tag game but friendly tags for my fellow musicians to ramble on about music/instruments if they want to: @eepymonstrr @ongreenergrasses @hookedhobbies @caffeinatedbraincell @elkkiel (bc drums 👀) @branches-in-a-flood (unless it’s too long ago now and doesn’t bring you joy to talk about) and anyone else who wants to ! GOODNIGHT!!!

[aaronymous999]

This is such good insight! I don’t write fics about canon characters, but I headcanon a lot so this is very helpful :)

Now I am thinking of Miles’ comfort food being some kind of coconut dessert ( I love coconut but not too educated on Puerto Rican desserts! Will do research before making my Miles, Margo and Gwen headcanon list! )

Also fun little factoid about Miles, in Insomniac’s Miles Morales we see some beta suit designs Miles has doodled and almost all of them take design/inspiration/colors from the Puerto Rican flag! Shame we didn’t get his Puerto Rican variant suit in the game, praying it’s a suit in Spider-Man 2! Haven’t seen anyone put that on their wishlist but now it’s on mine!!!

more insight on miles’ puerto rican heritage for your fics or fanart

- traditional quinceañeras (or as they are often called by puerto ricans quinceañeros) are really not that common anymore, most girls nowadays have pool parties or go on a cruise. if miles were to go to one of his cousins’ 15 birthday party, chances are it would be casual— no big poofy dress (his mom probably had one like that though)

edit: some people disagree on this. depends on how traditional your family and friend group is I guess, as well as which part of the island you��re from. on average, it seems to be a far bigger deal amongst some other latines. in my class in pr only 3 out of approx 30 girls had a big event like that. not a single one of my cousins had a traditional quince either so you could say I’m partly biased bc of my own experiences. i personally just had a big pool party

- plantains are a big part of our diet. also, pr being an island in the caribbean, coconut is in a lot of our desserts. if miles had to pick a favorite fruit I hc he’d pick either one of the two lol also please google our food, our food isn’t actually spicy so much as savory

- we “celebrate” thanksgiving like other americans. it’s about the only time we eat oven roasted turkey. for winter holidays (christmas eve/day, new years eve/day, three kings day/eve) oven roasted pork. chicken might be offered as a second option for people who don’t consume pork for whatever reason

- you’re pretty much taught how to dance as soon as you can walk. most of us have basic rhythms down. chances of miles dancing with his mom or friends at parties? astronomically high.

- the reason why our flag is everywhere, besides pride, is ‘cause it was illegal to own it. look up the gag law that prohibited us from even displaying it at our homes. so it’s actually an awesome detail in these movies

- this is my opinion/a fun fact but I feel like miles is basically an homage to black and puerto rican (specifically nuyorican) solidarity around the 70s-80s during the creation of hip-hop and rise of graffiti as a form of expression (you can easily read up on this or watch shows like the get down to learn more about this if you’re curious)

- whether you’re “nuyorican” or “from the island” spanglish is common so miles’ mixing english and spanish isn’t odd bc even rio does this as miles points out in the party scene. he isn’t a “no sabo” kid so much as someone with a strong accent. he understands his mom perfectly

- race ≠ ethnicity. there are plenty of black people in and from Puerto Rico, and miles’ pr family in the spiderverse films are designed to be for the most part afro-latine. so I wouldn’t really call him biracial

- the puerto rican day parade wouldn’t be a thing he skips, he’s gifted a special suit for it in a comic run. his puerto rican heritage is important to him!

[mushroomjar]

For context: The first image is a screenshot of a post I reblogged with the tags I left on my reblog, and the second screenshot are tags @beatsyncer replied to mine with

[Image Description: The first image is a screenshot of a post that reads: "fuuuuuck i miss the internet 10-15 years ago when it was ugly as shit and really bad for me in a different way than it is now". My tags read: "not to be that person but this is what some vocaloid fans sound like now, i can elaborate but on an ask/different post". The second image is a screenshot of different tags that read: "@ prev (this is beatsyncer asking) pls elaborate about vocaloid bc i think i'll agree with you, also too much nostalgia for things that werent that great in general". End Image Description]

You kind of touched on it a little bit with the mention of the nostalgia for things that weren't really that great tbh

Let me preface by saying I understand missing the old vocaloid/vsynth community. Hell, I miss it too, a lot. But a lot of people who say this I feel are just blinded by nostalgia, because let's be real, the old community kind of REALLY sucked

The refusal to give credit to producers? We still make memes about the "song by Miku and no one else, just Miku uwu" people, and tbh we still have some remnants of those days

The normalization of problematic age gaps and sexualization of minors and other terrible things is something else that comes to mind immediately. With this I am not judging every single person that still listens to some of these old songs that would've been more questioned had they been released today, but I am still using it to drive my point home. "I miss the old fandom" You miss the fandom that popularized a song glorifying incest to the point it got added to the Project Diva games?

This was a problem of the old Internet in general too, but also the spreading of art without giving credit to the artist was so rampant it's another remaining problem. (And yes, removing credit to artists is still a problem today, but trust me it was SO bad before, at least we're a little bit better now)

I can think of a few more things but I can't word them well, so I'm ending the post here. Basically, how I feel about people that talk about missing the old vocaloid community a bit too much is the same way I feel about the people that go on about "vocaloid being dead/a dying fandom". Like hmm, there may be some truth in there... but are you sure about that?

[macroglossus]

I am not used to Tumblr yet but my sister told me that you posted something about being upset about stolen tags and I just wanted to apologize. I'm not very good at understanding the like- right things to do on here ig? Basically, I didn't mean to just steal your tags idk what to do when they're funny and you wanna repost them but they aren't yours.

absolutely don't worry about that at all! i sort of figured that that was the case after checking out your blog- it's happened to me before and i'm pretty sure that was Just Because so that was the real genesis of my post lol. also being new is absolutely lawless i think i added a comment to every single post i came across when i first joined so you get a pass

for future reference usually when you like someone's tags you can tag your post #prev tags, and then it's up to you whether you want to add the entire block of tags or not- tbh every time i see a #prev i automatically go and check the blog they reblogged from bc i'm curious. ALSO you can add your own tag commentary which is smth i do all the time (bc as you can tell im very verbose lmao)

the only issue i have with quote unquote stolen tags is that pretty much everything else you do on here has automatic credit- like if you reblog a post and add a comment and then someone else likes that comment and rbs after you your name is on the comment. same w replies that people screenshot and add to posts (although sometimes i see people leave out the name which i think is weird but it's pretty uncommon). personally i do the bulk of my replying in the tags themselves so i get a little shifty ab the whole thing

[stop-using-prev-tags]

Did you know that tumblr will generate "year in review" stats for single-purpose sideblogs? I didn't!

I posted 9 times in 2022

That's 9 more posts than 2021!

6 posts created (67%)

3 posts reblogged (33%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@thebibliosphere

@terezis

@bythebyandbithebi

I tagged 8 of my posts in 2022

Only 11% of my posts had no tags

#prev tags - 1 post

#but i am legitimately glad sponsoring the post is amusing to people - 1 post

#if you only intend to communicate with one person - 1 post

#i mentioned this another post but when you use tags you are communicating with everyone who follows or browses your blog - 1 post

#i also have adhd and hard same - too often it's a boring slog without a worthwhile reward especially for sequential prev tags - 1 post

#they passed peer review - 1 post

#like you are achieving communication with *your* intended target but at the expense of being irritating to all other people - 1 post

#or maybe it's a little more like having a full-voice phone convo in rhe middle of a group of people? - 1 post

#not as long as the og but still - 1 post

#long post - 1 post

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#like actually putting the tags in question on your own reblog (whether in the tags or in the text or in a screenshot) is objectively better

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

https://theladydrgn.tumblr.com/post/681999207675150336 are you aware someone screenshotted a portion of your post and it's up to 10k notes

I saw that come across my dash separately a bit ago, I think it's hilarious. I'm not familiar with the OP of the screenshot post but if I had to guess, I'd guess that 10k notes is prolly bc thebibliosphere reblogged it and her following is gargantuan.

(I actually follow thebibliosphere, too, and i saw her reblog of it before you pointed it out, although I didn't notice the note count until you pointed it out so thank you so much 😅)

16 notes - Posted April 19, 2022

#4

Screenshots are inaccessible to visually impaired people. If you feel that strongly about it please just promote copy/pasting instead

fun fact! the original post, if you read it all the way through, describes copy-pasting, either within the tags of your reblog or within the text, as alternatives if you don’t want to screenshot

22 notes - Posted April 19, 2022

#3

apparently i’m getting kungpowpenis’d but bc I turned off notes for this sideblog I’m immune from the negative effects~~~

34 notes - Posted April 19, 2022

#2

Because the prev tags is not for you or any of my followers but for the person who wrote the tags ofc but I appreciate the amount of effort you put into this cause you must feel very strongly about it

someone rb'd with a picture of martin luther getting his thesis-nailing on, which probably wasn't meant in a complimentary way but I thought was funny.

also, direct message.

36 notes - Posted April 19, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

JUST TAKE A SCREENSHOT

If you see tags that someone else left on a post and want to share them with your followers (or anyone else who chances across your blog), please, please, PLEASE: don't use "prev tags," or "previous tags" or "prev prev tags" or any variation that may occur to you at the moment you're making that decision.

The very best way on Tumblr to:

share that information in the tags with people who follow you, or

continue a conversation that the person who said that thing in the tags, or

let everyone know how hard you're cackling at a joke someone made, or

whatever other reason you're drawing attention to someone else's tags

is to actually add the tag in question to the version of the post as it will appear when you reblog it. A screenshot is the most durable way to do this, since it gets included in all the downstream reblogs from your own, but if you don't want that for some reason, just replicate the actual tag in question in the tags of your reblog. If you're absolutely, vehemently against the screenshot, including the tags in question could look like this:

or like this:

OP has some really great tags:

#cool additional commentary tangential to the original topic #user who added the tags didn't include them in the body of the post but you thought they were important

and I think everyone should see them

The biggest reason to do this is that nobody wants a scavenger hunt. This is especially true when the tags in question are from more than one reblog down the line, or ones that you found in the notes on a different reblog chain.

The other big reason is the durability thing mentioned earlier. Maybe the tags you're enamored with came from OP, and they decided they didn't want notifications from the post anymore and deleted it. If you used "omg OP's tags 😹" with no further clarification, that information is lost forever when OP deletes the post. Same case if OP (or the person you reblogged from) deactivates, or gets deactivated. Actually including the tags in question makes sure that as long as someone is viewing it on your blog (or on any downstream reblog from you, if you used a screenshot) they can see the same thing you did.

Using "prev tags" instead of actually including the tags you're talking about results in a significant decrease in the usability of the website. Please, just screenshot the tags, or reproduce them in your post.

4,284 notes - Posted April 17, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ummick]

hi prev anon here! "wags" as a tag would be perfect. and tbh i'm not on the george tag nearly as much so whatever works best for you in terms of your umgeorge sideblog!

i saw your other asks and i just have to say i totally agree! i'm literally about mick's age (so i guess the core audience maybe) but i just find the "influencer/content creator" stuff to be...inauthentic i guess? it's just REALLY not for me (tbh makes me a little uncomfortable at times which is totally a me thing) and i try my best to curate my space so i don't see it.

thank you so much for understanding - i genuinely appreciate it <3

okiedokie! i'll do my damnedest to remember <3 you can also just put her ig/tiktok handle on the like keywords blacklist, that way if i ever do forget it'll still be hidden bc 'lailahasanovic' is in the caption c: and yeah like. i struggle, cuz influencers are unfairly singled out for judgment for basically commodifying their existence, being insincere/inauthentic to do it, and capitalizing on their conventional attractiveness, none of which are new things, but the particular way they do it just gives me the ick. i've had a deep-seated hatred of advertising from a rather young age and effectively their entire life is an ad that they're pretending isn't, BUT THEN ALSO i watch pro sports and am attached to my f1 drivers, who also have public personas that were crafted by others to be appealing to sponsors, so i'm just stewing in my hypocrisy and letting myself bitch apofihaphdadf ANYWAY! hope you have a good weekend ahead dear <3

[infernalfae]

question for my beloved mutuals and loyal followers: should i start having an Actual tagging system? would that be beneficial to yall or does no one care? i kno i already occasionally tag some stuff, but should i like start actually consistently tagging all the art/posts i rb as the thing theyre from

[likeshipsonthesea]

whats wrong with prev tags

ah okay this may just be me being 'old and crotchety fandom person' (which shouldn't be possible bc i am a child but whatever) but imo prev tags is like..the opposite of how tags should be??

when i started using tumblr, if someone liked/agreed with your tags they would screenshot them or copy them into a reblog. it was like someone telling you 'this is a meaningful contribution to this post!!' and that was important bc like. adding tags would be a suggestion, like these are my thoughts and then someone else would deem it good enough to add to the post--it was collaborative, peer-reviewed, and the vibes were different than just adding it yourself

and like. say you agreed w someone's tags but didn't want to add it to the post, you would retype the previous tags and mention it was from the previous reblog, and i like that so much more than 'prev tags' bc like. it's immediate. so much of tumblr posting system is creating a one-stop-shop with all the content in one post, easy to follow and right there for viewing. all of the content i want to see is right there, put together from different sources and such, chronological and sensical and it's just--the collaboration and the vibes and idk what i'm saying at this point but like, 'prev tags' goes against all the things i love about the tumblr format.

also i know ppl think it's like funny and stuff to make ppl click back through previous reblogs to see the original 'prev tags' but i just find it annoying personally 🙃

[faemen]

I posted 33,446 times in 2021

6857 posts created (21%)

26589 posts reblogged (79%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 3.9 posts.

I added 1,585 tags in 2021

#reblog - 363 posts

#fave - 293 posts

#fae plays stuff - 291 posts

#fae watches stuff - 193 posts

#ace attorney - 103 posts

#/lh - 86 posts

#yttd spoilers - 85 posts

#prev tags - 59 posts

#genshin impact - 57 posts

#yeah - 55 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#all my friends that ive gotten into gi have passed me in ar 😒 whatever i can exploit your maxed out chars now for my own benefits at least!

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

celesgiri headcanons

this is fully self indulgent

tea dates!!! whether they go out to cafes or just brew some at home, they like having tea dates :)) they prefer quieter cafes when they do go out though

kyoko likes coffee too, so celeste learned how to make her coffee and kyoko makes awesome royal milk tea

celeste LOVES dressing kyoko up. her detective gf is so pretty and she wants to get her pretty dresses to show that

also celeste just. really likes running her hands through kyoko's hair?? likes it's really soft and stuff and hfhdgj

kyoko probably overworks a lot and celeste needs her beauty sleep. that being said, celestia will make kyoko tea and stuff and remind her to rest a lot. to make up for the allnighters, celeste takes a lot of like small naps so she invites kyoko to come too

celeste can get VERY jealous and overprotective lmao. kyoko also does get jealous just less,,,loudly so

they like to hold hands hfhjskg

kyoko loves her goth gf

they're both kinda bad with emotions so it takes them a while to like. confess. they both KNOW they fancy each other though, there's no confusion. it's just,,,kyoko tends to not Really Say Much At All and celestia hides it behind half lies and offhand compliments

celeste uses pet names like dear, darling, old fashioned stuff like that, and also a lot of like. princess and things

kyoko though doesn't use tooo many petnames, more so nicknames and stuff.

kyoko is definitely a cat person so she and grand bois chéri ludenberg get along very well

131 notes • Posted 2021-01-01 09:29:20 GMT

#4

id like to think im smart

155 notes • Posted 2021-01-01 20:24:39 GMT

#3

new rb/ask game what would your objection bubble be if you were in ace attorney

162 notes • Posted 2021-09-13 22:28:14 GMT

#2

expose yourself by listing which ace attorney singular case side characters are your favourites, ill go first

247 notes • Posted 2021-08-12 20:16:22 GMT

#1

ace attorney??? more like really fucking gay attornies who are SO THICKHEADED i am going to kill them

why couldnt this just be a fandom thing like i thought it was before i played. why cant they just make these canon. why must we suffer so

i dont even want them to be canon cuz yknow normal reasons, i just want the fu kdingnf PINING TO STOP cuz its SO MUCH WORSE EVERY TIME

wrightworth? killed me. not bc of their cuteness or normal ship reasons, nooo instead you change your entire major for a guy you knew for 4 months when you were 9 and book a private jet cuz you thought the guy was dying and gain unnecessary feelings and have that man shine brilliantly in your eyes and share a deep dark secret with the exact same girl who just confessed her love to a guy and being great partners and trusting in each other to find the truth and enjoy biting into apples because theyre red and

klapollo? dont even get me started. once again, not because of normal ship reasons, but because they make me so infuriatingly mad. but yknow being used to getting inspected by the ladies but feeling that way for the first time with a man and calling each other cool while blushing and treating your guitars like lovers instead of smashing them on stage and singing a song about your boyfriend being the prosecutions witness and taking care your heart isnt stolen away and wiping pretty smiles off your opponents face and pulling the darkness out of him and being dazzled and literally asking him out to dinner is all normal and straight dude stuff

lanamia? girlfriends? really? i cant believe you thought that going to law school together and being both a detective and prosecution at the same time she was a defense attorney and being close enough to her you had to push her away and break contact when you got involved with a murder and dying at the hands of the man that blackmailed her and her being the first person you tried to contact when you were in trouble and being attracted to her (intellectually) could possibly mean anything not straight at all.

franmaya?? wtf are you on about??? wdym you saw acts of lesbianisms when two women admire each others strengths for being so strong in her own way in the exact same situation as herself and when theyre narrative foils and when one of them avoids whipping the other despite not doing this for pretty much anyone else and when she spends all night on a freezing cold mountain doing something extremely difficult to make sure the other is okay and out as soon as possible?

faraskye? HA dont make me laugh. why are you even telling me about how theyre literally a detective and thief which fits the trope perfectly and about how they investigate together and about how they worry about each other and how they both have big dreams about their careers in the future which theyre super passionate about and have entirely planned until something comes in their way?? this is all heterosexual behaviour???

blackmadhi? you mean having opposite designs that are black + edgy and white + holy while having the complete opposite personalities to their outfits and calling each other sad monk and reverse panda while fiercely going off against each other because neither of them can bear to lose and putting up facades to keep others away from their true selves but still caring about their younger siblings and doing anything for their sakes? yeah i dont see it.

junithena? youve got to be kidding. playing together in the woods as children and growing up to still remember each other even when others dont approve and being determined to help her find her true self and being worried that shes anxious while remembering what happens when she does even though its been years and getting mad at anyone who bothers her and sobbing because she gave you an orange and promising to defend her no matter what and taking a risk so that she doesnt get in trouble in court and calling each other nicknames and getting jealous that two people are fighting over her love while calling her a bunch of compliments and being supportive but sad when she gets a crush on a guy for some weird forking reason doesnt mean anything at all.

asoryuu????? whaaaat??? cant believe you ever thought that being certified besties and taking a huge risk so that said bestie wouldnt lose their dream and calling each others partners like every line and that thinking hes the pride and joy of your university and not sleeping in the same bed so you can go into the closet and teasing each other while still showing your unbreakable bond is homosexual activity.

tldr: theyre straight /s and i hate them

409 notes • Posted 2021-05-25 23:23:41 GMT

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hi this bit is from fae and STOPPPPP WITH THE DANGANRONPA WHAT THE HELL

[peaches-writes]

how to appease your asian aunties ch. 3 - spring break

* icym: this was prev. a guide to social gatherings but i changed the title bc i still think i’m funny that way

description: in the immortal words of blood-related aunts and aunts you’re not even related to but forced to call your aunt at reunion parties, “do you have a boyfriend?”  member: jisung / han  genre: fluff, fake dating au, implied rich kids au, eventual childhood / best friends to lovers au, college au, implied fem reader (but i still used they/them pronouns)  word count: 5.4k chapter warning: food, a conversation calling out toxic asian family culture oops note: i’m not confident with this one bc i had to re-write this two times (?) with diff. plot directions + srsly idk what happened here what was the point am i ok + i didn’t post this accidentally this time !!!! 

ch. 1 // ch. 2 //  series masterlist

After seeing you and Jisung interact during your trip to the mall, your mom has started loving this new idea of you dating one of her close friends’ sons so much that she has not-so-discreetly started conspiring with Mrs. Han in order to see the two of you together as much as possible. From invitations for snacks and drinks at one’s house every day after school to whole-day activities on the weekends (usually to the mall or the cinema), it didn’t take long before you and your own best friend put two and two together and conclude that your respective moms have somewhat developed an auntie type of obsession over your fake relationship. 

This idea that your moms would love you and Jisung together so much to this extent initially flew past your head when you started this fake relationship last Christmas. You were only thinking of casually fake dating your best friend, after all; such arrangement ideally confined only in social gatherings where invasive relatives and family friends ask about your love life endlessly. You genuinely did not expect that that Jisung would start tagging along to you and your parents’ Sunday movie dates and side with your dad every time you disagree on your selected movie’s ending; or that you would not be parting ways with Jisung after school anymore when you reach your house and he has to drive another block to get to his.

But for the most part, you’ve decided as the weeks fly by with this new added twist in your everyday, it’s fun and, even at times, cute. Though Mrs. Han dotes on you more now, like you’re her own child, and your mom is starting to be more talkative around Jisung since they now have you to talk about, you still get to eat snacks either your mom or Mrs. Han made, hog the extraordinarily fast wifi at Jisung’s house, and get free movie tickets and shopping bags from when you’re going out with the other’s family on the weekends. Plus, it’s made your workaholic mom come home earlier just to see you and Jisung lounging in your living room and Mrs. Han’s worries lessen now that Jisung’s busy with something else that isn’t academics or whatever it is he does with his Bumble and Tinder apps. 

At times, it’s tiring having to hang out with your best friend under the guise of a couple, especially when you didn’t really plan for it to be this way, but you can’t deny that there are perks to it. 

So, you wait more patiently for Jisung every day after your classes now even when he usually takes a lot of detours to see his friends before driving over to you on the other side of campus. You still hang out with your friends, Ryujin and Chaeryeong, after classes, of course, but you part ways with them just a little bit earlier now to anticipate Jisung’s Convertible pulling up in front of your building and unnecessarily yelling at you to get in even when he’s the one awfully late. 

Because if you were to choose between your other best friends and a free expensive snacks, you’d always choose the latter without fail. 

“You know,” Chaeryeong comments next to you on this particular Friday, stretching her legs down to the steps below you three while you scroll through your phone and Ryujin naps on your shoulder with her earphones still plugged in. “if I didn’t know that you’re ditching us earlier for free fake dating food, I would’ve thought that you and squirrel boy were seriously dating.” 

“You always think we’re dating either way.” You roll your eyes, not even sparing a glance at the smug grin on her features. “Anyway, aren’t you happy we’re ‘dating’ now? It’s what you’ve always hoped for but, you know, fake.” 

Only then do you turn to Chaeryeong over your shoulder, also scrolling through her social media on her phone. She meets your gaze after with a scrunched up nose and furrowed eyebrows. “Hm,” She pretends to contemplate, placing her index finger up to her chin. “I don’t know. I think I’ll have to wait until someone caves and you actually develop feelings for each other—like in books!” 

“Seriously?” You deadpan with pursed lips, only making her laugh. “Of all things you could bring up.”

Chaeryeong shrugs in response with a knowing smile, chuckling when your expression doesn’t change. “You never know!” She replies in her defense, laughing all the way. “You did say after break that you’re just going to fake date if there’s an event but it’s Spring Break tomorrow already and you’ve been fake dating every day since classes started again.” 

“Sounds like a romantic trope to me.” She comments last teasingly before you can even interject, swiftly dodging your hand when you reach up to try and smack her. Literature majors, really. 

“For one, I don’t want to date Jisung, I’ve seen enough of him my whole life for that and I don’t think I’m in the mood to date in general. And besides, we’re only a ‘couple’ at home when someone’s mom is watching.” You counter as you retract your free hand back to your side, alternating your gaze between her and your other hand with your phone. Jisung’s last message is that of him informing you that he’s making a quick stop at the International Relations department today to hand Hyunjin his books ten minutes ago. Knowing him, if he didn’t get lost or got distracted by a kiosk selling coffee, he’s probably on his way now. “And you know I love free stuff, it just happens to come only if I hang out with Jisung these days.” 

“So what happens when you ‘break up’? And I don’t mean the cute perks from the aunties.” Chaeryeong asks next, leaning back on her propped elbows now that the stairs going up to your college building have started to cool down from being exposed to the sun the entire day. “I mean, it’s back to normal for us as your friends—I do miss not having to remind my parents that you’re a couple now—but your moms are going to think it’s weird that you suddenly broke up and went back to being friends like nothing happened.” 

“I already told you and everyone else, we’ll think about that when it happens.” You shrug both at her and the nagging thought in your mind that she has a point.   

“And when exactly will that happen?” She prods on, smiling smugly at knowing that you and Jisung never talked about this certain part of your current predicament clearly. “‘Dating until everyone doesn’t think of Jisung as a fuckboy or when aunties stop offering blind dates’ sounds vague to me.”

You see Chaeryeong’s smile grow bigger when you don’t answer immediately, accidentally letting time pass until Jisung’s gray Convertible pulls up steps below you with an obnoxious honk. 

“Y/N, my mom bought gelato today!” Jisung yells at you from his roofless car, his radio blasting Bermuda Triangle at an embarrassingly loud volume. “Let’s go!” 

You then quickly shake Ryujin awake in response, gently moving her to Chaeryeong’s legs when her eyes open, before standing up and waving goodbye at your two friends. “Like I said, I’ll let you know when it happens.” You hurriedly conclude your conversation with Chaeryeong with a triumphant smile, making her roll her eyes. “See you after the break!” 

Chaeryeong only shakes her head in disbelief, easily letting you go from her interrogation with a wave goodbye. “You be careful now, hm? Have fun with your ice cream, then!” 

You chuckle as you run down the stairs, waving your hand up for her as you move away without sparing a last glance. “Don’t worry, I’ll take pictures!” At this, you open the front passenger seat to Jisung’s car and smoothly slide in, haphazardly discarding your backpack next to his at the back before closing the door next to you. “Hey, ugly. Glad you didn’t get lost on campus.”

“Speak for yourself, ugly.” Jisung teases back, shifting the car’s gear back to ‘Drive.’ “How was your day? You three look so bored out of your mind there.”

"Better now that we’re going to eat ice cream at home.” You put your seatbelt on as Jisung now drives the car home, reaching over to the radio in between the two of you after and lowering the volume. “Classes were tiring as usual. What flavors did auntie get, by the way?”

Jisung almost makes the wrong turn with your choice of words, quickly gathering his thoughts and shaking his head. “Fu—u-um, Ferrero, strawberry, and mint choco, that’s what she texted me.” He shrugs, making the correct turn to the nearest campus gate this time. 

From the corner of his eyes, you nod with a hum as you sink back in your seat, completely missing the way you unconsciously caught him off-guard even with the screech of the car tires. “Oh, cool—no pun intended there.” You chuckle to yourself, leaning to the opposite side now to watch the college buildings pass by. “We’re watching The Conjuring 2, right?”

“Yeah.” Jisung scoffs, brushing off what remains of his sudden nervous feeling with the comment. “Tch, cool.” 

Like every Wednesday and Friday that Mrs. Han prepares you after school snacks and drinks, you and Jisung go through tubs of ice cream and tumblers of water while a horror film is projected on the television of the Han’s ground floor living room. Mrs. Han, who has her office day off on Fridays, would occasionally drop by and either ask if the two of you need anything or comment on her distaste for horror under her breath. 

“Oh, oh, dear.” She clutches her pearls dramatically, much like her son would, as she passes by for the sixth time to go to the kitchen and catches another glimpse of The Conjuring in the process. She then turns to you and Jisung after to calm her nerves, catching you still sprawled across the sofa with your legs lazily piled on top of Jisung’s.

Of course she’s seen you in the same position before in the few times you came over as one of Jisung’s friends but the sight now seems different under the guise that you and her son are a couple. Typical mom. 

“Hi, auntie!” You greet her when you catch her from the corner of your eye also for the sixth time, waving your empty spoon in greeting with one hand while the other blindly reaches for Jisung’s laptop on the coffee table to pause the movie. Jisung hides his face under a throw pillow at this, already having enough of his mom snooping around for today and you giving her the time of day. Since when did you get comfy with his mom, anyway? “Do you need anything?”

Mrs. Han immediately shakes her head with a dismissive wave and smile. “Ah, nothing, I was just checking up on you two!” She clarifies again. “Do you need anything? Extra pillows? More water?” 

You shake your head politely, holding up the water tumblers on your other side reassuringly. “We’re good but thank you!” 

At this, Mrs. Han clasps her hands together in satisfaction. “Alright, if you need anything, I’ll be in the kitchen, then!” She concludes, taking a step back from the door frame. “You’re staying for dinner, right, Y/N?” 

You glance over at Jisung, prying the throw pillow away from his face enough to see him shaking his head and making you feign a teasing frown for his mom. “You don’t want me to stay over dinner, babe?” You taunt with a smile, chuckling when he pushes the pillow back onto his face. Turning to Mrs. Han, you add, “I think Sung doesn’t want me staying for dinner, auntie, but I’ll gladly stay over if you want me to; anyway, my parents are coming home late today.” 

“What? Oh, he’s just being shy!” Mrs. Han dismisses with another wave of her hand. “Please do stay for dinner. I’ll text your mom for you too.” 

“Alright, if you say so.” You nod, giving her your sweetest smile now. “Thank you so much!”  

With that, Mrs. Han then bids you goodbye and proceeds to the kitchen. When the sound of her stilettos fades outside the living room, Jisung removes the throw pillow in front of his face with a groan, scooting closer to you until his shoulders bumped into yours. “My mom, seriously.” He then smacks you on the shoulder with the throw pillow as you press ‘play’ on his laptop again. “Ya, are you seriously dining with us tonight?” 

You kick his legs under yours in response. “I think it’s cute, it’s not like she caught us doing something weird.” You shrug in his mom’s defense. “And yes, I’m staying over because your mom is clearly cooking tonight and I can’t say no to an offer and free food.” 

“I’ll have to get back at you when we’re back at your house on Monday.” He counters back, shamelessly dipping his spoon on the mint chocolate ice cream in your hands. As he bites on the small chocolate drops on the ice cream, a thought then crosses his mind and he asks, “Wait, are we still hanging out on Spring Break?” 

You turn to him, swatting his hand belatedly before taking a big chunk of his strawberry ice cream. “I don’t know, my mom hasn’t mentioned anything and I don’t think my parents have any plans of going on vacation this break.” You answer truthfully before eating the spoonful of ice cream. “What about auntie?” 

“Nothing from her too.” He shakes his head. “Though we’re definitely going on vacation this Break—my dad really wants to check out the new Jeju hotel.” 

“When are you coming home?” 

“Friday night, I think? We leave on Sunday.” He answers, taking a sip of water now that the taste of ice cream is now making his mouth feel sticky. He takes note of how you used the same word again, recovering quicker this time before he could even choke. “So we’re definitely not hanging out on those days.” 

You hum against another spoonful of ice cream, this time from the Ferrero ice cream in the small gap between the two of you. “I mean, it’d be nice to be away from you for once—we’ve literally been joined to the hip after classes and most weekends since the New Year—but that would mean no free food which would be a shame; I really like your mom’s cooking.” 

“Ouch, I didn’t know you don’t like spending more time with me just for me.” He clutches his chest dramatically, hugging the throw pillow again. “I thought you’d like this since I was away for a year.” 

“We barely hung out before you even left.” You chuckle in amusement, grabbing the pillow from him again and this time lazily discarding it to the other end of the sofa. “I already thought you’re annoying the rare times we hung out before. Now, you’re just the bane of my existence.” 

Next to you, Jisung laughs along belatedly, holding his ice cream tub away when you try and take another spoonful of strawberry from him. “Yeah but I’m the bane of your existence that you’re ‘dating’ in front of the aunties for free stuff and them leaving you alone.” He points out, giving in to you after when you almost topple over the Ferrero ice cream and handing you his strawberry ice cream. “So you can’t really complain.” 

You roll your eyes as you exchange tubs of ice cream. In front of you, a jump scare goes unnoticed as you pay more attention to Jisung anticipating what your next words would be. “I’m grateful,” You clarify in a mumble as you chew on the ice cream. “But you’re still annoying as hell.” 

“Not like you’re any better.” He rolls his eyes with another playful laugh, shifting in his seat. “Yeah, I think we shouldn’t hang out on Spring Break: we’re going to ‘break up’ if we keep meeting too much at this point.” 

This time, it’s you who gets another thought at this comment. Shifting in your seat as well so you’re now facing Jisung, you ask in a change of topic, “Right, I meant to ask: when exactly are we ‘breaking up’?” You raise an eyebrow at him when his eyes widen in confusion. “It’s just that Chaeryeong and I were talking about it a while back and it had me thinking.”

“Hm? I thought we’ll do it a little after Chan and Miyoung’s wedding.” He shrugs nonchalantly. “There aren’t many events after that and I’m sure the aunties won’t bother you for a while since you’ll start working.” 

“And if they do?” You ask back curiously. “Starting work at your own parents’ company while going through a ‘break-up’ doesn’t exactly guarantee a free pass from blind dates—remember the last time Yeji had a relationship the aunties knew about?” 

“Right, that was quite chaotic.” Jisung replies, keeping his spoon in his mouth now instead of eating more ice cream as the unexpected question actually catches him off-guard. “But, I don’t know. I guess we can keep going a little longer after the wedding, until the aunties have someone else to bother or, you know—if you end up liking someone else.” 

You then catch Jisung’s eyes light up at this idea and you hear him quickly add, “Hey, how about that?” He then removes the spoon from his mouth, placing his ice cream down in between the two of you. “You don’t have to worry about your elders and we don’t have to fake date anymore.” 

“Actual dating?” You furrow your eyebrows. Jisung nods at this. “You know how I feel about that. I don’t think I want that for myself right now given the changes that are going to happen after we graduate.” You wave your hands around now, setting your ice cream and spoon down before sinking back in your seat. “And I especially don’t want that just for the sake of getting people to mind their own business; it’d be like giving in to the pressure in a way.” 

You glance over at Jisung to see him nodding thoughtfully now, an unfamiliar look crossing his features before he meets your gaze and comments, “Okay, that’s fair—but we both know it’d be too troublesome to fake date for a long time.” He then sighs, sinking into his own spot and leveling with your gaze.

Suddenly, you feel a shift in the air around you as Jisung sets his ice cream down on his other side. “Aish, don’t you just wish you can talk back to older people?”

“Yeah.” You nod in agreement this time, pursing your lips. The air suddenly felt sincere now, a bit comical since the people keep screaming on the television in front of you but, for some reason, you don’t feel like laughing because Jisung isn’t despite obviously having the same thoughts. “I mean, we all know that the talks about dating and career and everything else are often in good-nature but a lot of times they’re just invasive and a bit rude.” 

When Jisung doesn’t reply as quickly, you nudge his shoulder and add, “I especially think of the time you told some of the parents during Yeji’s birthday about your plans to study in Malaysia and how negatively they received it because they think you won’t graduate on time and that you should just finish college quickly and work.” Jisung’s eyes widen in surprise this time. “They don’t know how hard you work in your studies or how you really wanted to go abroad and explore and I really wanted to scold them for it.” 

“Y-You still remember that?” He asks in disbelief, earning him a casual nod from you. 

“Of course,” You confirm, your free hand unconsciously balling into fists on your lap at the memory. “I’ve never wanted to yell at my mom’s friends until that point even when you tried laughing it off so I’m glad you proved them wrong when you came back during Christmas and impressed them when they asked about it again.” 

You see Jisung chuckle under his breath shyly, tearing his gaze at you for a moment. “You mentioned that night that you were annoyed. I never knew you were this annoyed.” He muses out loud. “Thanks.” 

“Thinking about it now, I feel a bit bad,” You point out after, heaving a frustrated sigh. “You’re keeping up with fake dating me even though it just started as a little joke last Christmas to protect me in a way but I couldn’t stand up to you two years ago.” 

Looking up at Jisung, he grins at you reassuringly and shakes his head, effectively easing the atmosphere back into being more lighthearted. “No, it’s okay.” He dismisses your frown. “Just knowing what you really thought then is fine already.” 

“And,” He shifts in his seat after, transferring the tubs of ice cream in between the two of you now to his other side so he can scoot closer. “I get free food every other day from your mom because we’re ‘dating’ so it’s nothing, really.” 

You scoff when he breaks out into laughter. “Right, of course.” You deadpan before breaking out into genuine laughs yourself. “What was I even thinking, talking about sincere things with you?” 

The two of you laugh for a while, even more when Jisung pretends to complain that you just 'wasted’ the last act of the movie talking about ‘mushy stuff.’ 

“Stop complaining, dummy,” You smack his elbow, sitting up properly now as the credits begin to roll. “you entertained my rants instead of stopping me so it’s your fault too.” 

“Because you brought up something of mine from two years ago!” He protests before moving away to gather all your scattered snacks to the coffee table, laughing in disbelief all throughout. “I had to respond or it’d be rude!” 

You only roll your eyes at him, making the two of you laugh even harder. You then lean back on the sofa, stretching your hands above your head and removing your legs off of Jisung while he disconnects his laptop from the television and closes both electronic gadgets. 

Turning to you, after, you see his laughs turn into a small sincere smile once again. “But seriously,” He says, glancing back at you from his shoulder. “Thanks.” 

“For?” You prod him teasingly, earning you a groan of frustration from him. 

“For almost getting mad at the elders?” He jokes back with a raised eyebrow before going back to being sincere again. “Nah, for being understanding with me and my choices.” 

“Of course,” You reply casually. “even if we joke around a lot, you’re one of my best friends—well, as if I had a choice in that, you know me too well and too long.”     

“Way to ruin the moment.” He frowns at you in feigned disappointment, making you chuckle, until another thought crosses his mind. “And, Y/N?” 

“Hm?” You look up expectantly at him. 

“We have to break up some time after the wedding but I’ll still try and protect you,” He clears his throat awkwardly. “from the ‘rude’ and ‘invasive’ comments after, I mean. You should do whatever you want to do freely and date seriously when you want, not when older people pressure you into it.” 

At this, your gaze softens at him visibly, even more when he doesn’t make other hints that he’s joking. “Thank you.” You mumble, just loud enough for only him to hear when you see Mrs. Han pass by the hallway again. “You should too, you know, do whatever you want and date whenever you want to.”

Jisung opens his mouth to speak but, behind him, you catch a glimpse of Mrs. Han suddenly returning to the hallway and stopping by the living room entrance again, waving at you and unintentionally cutting her son off. “Y/N, Sungie, dinner’s ready!” She informs you before Jisung could even get a single syllable out, making him purse his lips in annoyance with his face hidden from his own mom’s view. “Y/N, I already texted your mom, by the way, and she said it’s fine that you stay over for dinner.” 

You turn to the side and nod at Mrs. Han, chuckling when you see Jisung hiding his hands on his lap and exaggeratedly curling his fingers up in frustration. “Thank you, auntie! We’ll be right there!” You assure her, smiling up at her until she disappears back to the opposite direction of the kitchen. 

Turning back to Jisung, you swat his finger tips back into relaxing with a laugh. “Guess we have to go back to adhering to the system and fake dating for now, though.” You conclude with a giggle, standing up from the sofa and fixing your clothes. “What were you going to say before your mom barged in?” 

After a moment of silent contemplating, Jisung ends up shaking his head and following you, gathering the tubs of ice cream in his hands. “It was nothing.” 

“Really?” You ask, elbowing him gently before picking up your water tumblers from the sofa. “Come on, tell me.”

“It’s nothing, seriously.” Jisung assures you with a laugh, walking ahead of you out of the living room and turning around to see you catch up. “Come on, leech, dinner time.” 

You bump his shoulder with a laugh when you manage to catch up with him, “Shut up, you’re also a leech.” 

“But not on this day, you’re in my house.” He corrects. 

Dinner with the Hans regrettably passes too soon even with all of Mrs. Han’s questions on your school life and post-college plans; and Mr. Han bringing up embarrassing and, at times, even exaggerated stories from when you and Jisung were children. When Mr. Han is suddenly forced to retreat back into his home office to attend to a minor emergency (hastily bidding you and Jisung goodnight) and Mrs. Han managed to win in your argument over you helping her and the house helpers to do the dishes, the old grandfather clock at the house entrance strikes quarter to 9 PM which prompts Jisung to offer you company in walking back home. 

“Yes, how thoughtful of you, Sungie! Do walk Y/N home!” His mom comments with a proud grin as she shoos you out of the kitchen. “I’ll see you after Spring Break, Y/N, okay?” 

You nod, giving her one last side hug, careful of the dish washing liquid bubbling up on her pink gloves. “Have fun on your trip to Jeju, auntie!” 

“I’d ask you to come along if it didn’t turn out so last minute, I did mention it on New Year” She jokes, much to Jisung’s horrified face. “Oh, Sungie, what’s that look for? Don’t you want Y/N to go on a trip with us next time?” 

You giggle nervously, pulling away from the hug after and taking a step back to Jisung’s side. “Maybe next time, auntie? I have lots of deadlines this break, anyway.”

“Ya!” Jisung hisses at you discreetly, pouting again that you’re entertaining his mom’s antics. You only elbow him in response. 

In front of you, Mrs. Han seriously contemplates on the idea before waving her drier glove. “Yes, it is quite last-minute right now since we leave on Monday.” She smiles fondly. “Next time, it is, then!” 

“Okay, that’s enough planning for a future trip!” Jisung quickly interjects before you can humor his mom longer, placing an arm over your shoulder and turning you around to face the open door leading outside. “It’s getting late and I have to walk back here on my own after!” 

You wave back at Mrs. Han, laughing when she rolls her eyes at her son before bidding you one last goodnight. “Goodnight, auntie!” 

With that, Jisung gently pushes you into a run out of his house, haphazardly closing the door behind him and directing you across the front lawn, to their gates, then, finally, to the dimly-lit streets of your subdivision. You’re only pulled to a stop when Jisung almost pushes you to a car parked on the house across his, making you laugh. 

“Ya, we didn’t have to run out so fast!” You protest, clutching your stomach with one hand while the other hits his side. “My stomach hurts.” 

“You keep entertaining my mom’s ideas!” He playfully whines back in between tired pants, catching his breath quickly before throwing an arm over your shoulder. “If you’ll keep going like this, you might actually become best friends!” 

You scoff, keeping his arm on your shoulder anyway as the two of you now walk to the direction of your house. “Watch your words, Han Jisung, or it might actually happen.” You warn him teasingly, adjusting your backpack on your shoulder. “Besides, I was just doing what you were doing on New Year—how did you call it?—’earning points.’” 

“I also told you then that my mom already likes you so much,” He pouts, easily pulling you flush against him when a lone car passes by. Instinctively, he then moves you to his other side so he’s walking closer to the road. “You’re just going to be more annoying at this point.” 

“Well, I like your mom, too, so I’m going to be extra annoying from now on,” You grin mischievously. “maybe until we ‘break up’ then everything’s going to be awkward for a while.” 

Glancing over at Jisung from your side, you see him genuinely frown momentarily before sighing in feigned defeat. “Fine, do whatever you want.” 

You want to ask him about the sudden frown but you end up shrugging it off as you cross the street to get to the right turn at the intersection. With the new direction you’re walking into, Jisung shifts you to his other side again. 

“You know, it’s not like some car’s going to crash into us,” You move to his other side anyway and swiftly dodging another offer of him slinging his arm over your shoulder. “We’re inside the village? Where the speed limit is 20 kph?” 

Jisung scoffs, dropping his arm back to his side “Your house is on your side of the street, dumbass, that’s why I moved you there.” And, as if on cue, you see your own house slowly coming into view among the towering gates and trees. “That little heart-to-heart talk we had must be getting to you, huh?” 

“As if.” You elbow his side in retaliation, your backpack hitting his back slightly in the process which only fuels his teasing more. 

“Aren’t you glad I’m here to walk you home?” He asks with a grin, just as you reach your gates. “Imagine if you got lost when we’re literally a block apart.” 

“I hope the dog next door escapes and chases you back home,” You groan, walking a few steps ahead to open the smaller entrance on your gate with your key. 

Behind you, Jisung only laughs, unfazed, before walking over to your side again and extending his arms out for a hug. “Okay, sorry,” He grins halfheartedly. “Come here, goodbye hug.”  

You raise an eyebrow at him, swinging your gate open with one hand and stepping one foot on the other side. “What do you mean? My mom’s inside.” 

“Yeah, but I haven’t hugged you alone in a while.” He points out while tilting his head sideways, earning him a genuine look of confusion from you. 

“Ya, it’s not like we don’t hug platonically before all this.” He adds with a shaky snicker before pouting. “I’m going to get s—”

“Okay, fine.” You scoff with a small smile, stepping outside again to hug him. “Look who’s getting all mushy now.” 

“Yeah, yeah,” He shakes his head against your neck, reluctantly pulling away from you after a while. Rubbing the nape of his neck bashfully, he adds, “It’s just that—everything’s been a bit different now since I got home.”  

“It’s mostly your fault—”   

“—I know and I don’t regret it,” He interjects quickly, wiping the smug smile of your face. “since I’m doing it to get you away from creepy guys but it’s just us now and I sort of...miss being casual.” 

Your frown tugs upwards into a sincere smile as you lean back against the gates. “We are casual. It’s just that people are looking now.” 

“Can we hang out sometime?” He suggests with hopeful eyes. “just us, like old times.”

“You call it old times like it wasn’t just two years ago,” You point out, chuckling now. “But—sure.”

Jisung nods with a big grin now, excitedly shifting his weight on his feet. “So, see you after the Break?” 

“Buy me something nice from Jeju then we can talk.” You conclude, stepping inside now completely. “Night, Sungie.” 

“Hm, goodnight.” 

When you accompany one of the Han’s family drivers to fetch Jisung and his parents at Incheon International Airport exactly a week later, you only expected to see the box of imported chocolate snacks Jisung promised to buy you as the only unfamiliar thing that you’ll see, maybe even an entirely new carrier with Mrs. Han’s vacation haul if she did actually spent more time shopping than working. 

What you genuinely did not expect, upon finally spotting your best friend and his parents waiting for you at crowded Seattle’s Best, is him holding more than just your box of chocolates. 

“Hey?” You wave at Jisung in confusion as you stop right in front of him. To your right, you catch a glimpse of the family driver, Mr. Yoo, greeting Mr. and Mrs. Han on the next table before obligingly taking their luggage cart. “Who’s this little angel?” 

Only then do you notice the two other unfamiliar people with Jisung’s parents, eyeing you curiously and whispering to Mrs. Han, probably to ask who you are.

Jisung waves his hand at you once before transferring the same hand over the nape of his neck, “Y-Yeah, um, this is—”    

But before he could even finish and maybe even explain, the little girl on his lap shifts in her place and jumps to stand in front of you. “Hello!” She grins sweetly in slightly broken Korean, waving one hand at you while the other clutches Jisung’s bear plushie. “I’m Kitty!”

“Oh, hi, Kitty!” You bend your knees slightly to level with her gaze hidden behind round eyeglasses, briefly sparing a glance at Jisung after and raising an eyebrow at him before smiling again at the little girl. “I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you!” 

“It’s nice to...m-meet you!” She politely returns the gesture, hugging Jisung’s bear plushie shyly after and making your heart skip a beat. “Will you also live with us?” 

“At home?” Your furrow your eyebrows deeply now, standing up properly and turning to Jisung who you then belatedly notice has stood up as well and slung his backpack and Kitty’s over his shoulder. “Sung?” 

Jisung stands next to Kitty and places a hand behind her back, clearing his throat awkwardly. “Kitty’s going to live with us for a while.” 

ch. 4 // series masterlist

tags: @t-toodumbtocare​ @sandaigdigan-reads​ @pwarkhans​ @ruellelix​ @malai-barfi​ @mahalau​ @milkywayfelix @qweens-stuff @tenclouds​ @crscendoforsung​ @verobibble

[livingthroughchoices-blog]

The Marshmallow Chronicles (Ch. 16: The Beaumont Bash) *NSFW*

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Author’s notes: Right. So I am SUPER nervous about this chapter bc it’s the most different and the one I’ve added the most stuff to so far. I really hope you like it omg. It’s also the longest yet. As always, I’m deeply sorry if you have to scroll through this on the app, but as of now, there’s nothing I can do about it /:

Thanks to all who like, reblog and/or comment, you guys keep me going! And especially to @starstruckzonkoperatorbat, @notoriouscs, @simplyaiden-blog, @snyggflicka, @asprankle, @speedyoperarascalparty, @mirivalencia, @mymandrake, @asobigokoro2018, @krisnicjack and @fabi-en-ciel for asking me to tag them! Please let me know if you want to be tagged or untagged (:

I love you and I reaaally hope this is okay.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: Mention of depression, suicide.

Rating: NSFW

Pairing: Drake x MC

Words: 8,059

As he got ready for the Beaumont Bash, Drake was aware of feeling an aching thirst for alcohol. He figured getting wasted was his best chance at surviving the unbearable sight of Liam and Riley together and might even stop him from thinking about her all night. 

With this in mind, he poured himself a glass of the unopened bottle of whiskey Liam had given him for his birthday. He swallowed with savage pleasure, as if Liam could know he was ignoring his request to share it with friends.

He debated whether to pour himself a second glass, then decided against it; he’d been to enough Beaumont parties to know this would be a long night. He should pace himself.

Having thrown his usual outfit on, he barely glanced at the mirror, not really caring much at all about his appearance tonight. 

It’s not like anyone will be looking. 

He trudged down to the ballroom, only to find Lady Kiara at the foot of the stairs. In his current mood, he gladly would have avoided her, but it was unfortunately the only way down.

Nevertheless, he tried to keep their meeting short and discourage conversation by saying, “Lady Kiara,” as curtly as possible and not stopping. 

He wasn’t fast enough, though, as a hand seized his forearm before he could make his getaway.

“And where do you think you’re going, Monsieur Walker?” she asked with a smirk. “I haven’t forgotten your promise of a legendary night, tu comprends?”

Oh fuck, not this. Why did I have to open my goddamn mouth?

Drake extricated his arm as politely as he could and averted his eyes. “Yeah, yeah, I comprends or whatever.” This made Kiara giggle, so he added a very discouraging, “We’ll see,” for good measure.

He burst into the ballroom, eager to fade into the crowd and get drunk by himself. And who should be there to welcome here other than Riley. She was wearing a midnight blue dress that made her skin look radiant and her eyes a deeper color than usual. Her hair was up in an elegant bun. Drake privately decided – I shouldn’t even be thinking about this – that he preferred it down, but there was no denying she looked beautiful either way.

Of fucking course. Can’t have a moment of peace around here. Does she always have to look so... so...

His frustration was such that he couldn’t come up with a single word for her; he came up with too many. He realized he’d pursed his lips and balled his fists when he’s seen her. He relaxed as he stepped up to her.

“Welcome to the Beaumont Bash...” she said with a grin. 

You’d think nothing happened yesterday. 

“You’ll recognize some of these fine floral arrangements as yours...” she gestured to the centerpieces.

“Heh. After yesterday, I was skeptical about this place being ready in time, but...” he looked around the lavish room, appraising it. “Looks like you’re about to have an actual party here.”

“I know, right?” said Riley excitedly. She gave him a once over, seeing him fully for the first time. “Though... you don’t look like you’re dressed for the occasion.”

Drake opened his arms as if on display. “You don’t like my look? This shirt’s clean.”

Riley sighed and rolled her eyes. “I guess that’s the most I should expect. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you dress up for these fancy events. It might be a nice change of pace.”

The comment stung more than it should have. 

Well, what did you expect? She’s marrying a prince! Why wouldn’t she think you look like crap? Anyway, me? Dressed like a fucking noble? No way.

He shrugged studiously. “Eh. Fashion is subjective. Besides, people are here to see the Prince, not me.” He attempted to keep the bitterness out of his voice at that last part; it was just a fact, after all. He thought he’d been successful until he saw Riley was shaking his head sadly at him.

He was about to reassure her that he didn’t mind, when Hana bounded up to them. She waved at him with a smile and he returned her greeting with the most cheerful nod he could muster. He felt an arm around his shoulder and turned to see Maxwell had joined them as well.

“Riley! Maxwell! I’ve never been to the Beaumont estate before. This looks wonderful,” admired Hana.

Maxwell replied, “Thank you, Hana...” as Drake shrugged his arm off.

“And you look lovely tonight, Riley,” said Hana, her eyes shining as she took in Riley’s elegant figure.

Riley beamed and returned the compliment, “As always, you look gorgeous too!”

Hana blushed deeply. To the unsuspecting eye, she might just seem like someone who was not used to receiving compliments, but Drake knew better; the corners of her lips were twitching and it was clear to him she was fighting back a smitten smile.

Luckily for Hana, at that moment, the waiters started bringing out the appetizers.

“Our creations!” Maxwell whispered.

“I hope people like them...” said Riley, biting her lip.

Lady Kiara, who was just behind them, wondered aloud, “Uhh... what is this dish?” when the waiter handed her one, along with a napkin.

Maxwell, doing his best pompous celebrity chef impression, explained, “What you have there is a deconstructed delicacy of caviar cultivated from pampered hake fish of the Swedish fjords with paprika harvested from a micro-nursery in Provence.”

Lady Penelope had bitten into it halfway through Maxwell’s bluffing description and now exclaimed, “Wow... so fancy... I like them! Spicy, salty, definitely unique.”

Encouraged by her friend’s reaction, Lady Kiara gave it a small bite too. “Mmmm... It reminds me of when I dined at the top of la Tour Eiffel in Paris! Did you use the same chef?”

She looked so impressed, Drake almost snorted. 

Rich people. Throw some food together, call it something fancy and they're happy.

“Someone comparable,” choked out Maxwell, obviously holding back laughter.

The suitors moved on to mingling with other nobles and Maxwell turned to his friends, “Well, the reactions to our appetizers seem mostly positive.”

“They like the food? Really?” Riley’s smile was almost ear to ear. “I can’t believe we pulled that off.”

“Yeah. I really thought this would be a complete disaster,” agreed Drake.

“I told you... it’s all in the marketing!” Maxwell gave him finger guns. 

Drake’s snide response was interrupted by the arrival of his two least favorite people – or should I say my least favorite snake and possessed murder doll.

Judging by the grimace on Riley’s face, which she quickly covered up with a reluctant smile, she felt the same way. “Duchess Olivia... Countess Madeleine... welcome.”

Hell no. 

Maxwell seemed to be thinking similarly, for he walked away from the group with Drake.

They each grabbed a glass of champagne.

“To not being a part of that conversation,” toasted Drake.

Maxwell chuckled and clinked his glass, saying, “Oh, come on, Drake, they’re not that bad. Olivia has been very loyal to Liam.”

“So? Doesn’t change the fact she’s about as pleasant as a root canal. And don’t get me started on Madeleine!”

“What’s wrong with her?”

“Are you kidding? I’d trust her as far as I could throw... Liam; I could probably throw her pretty far, actually. At least Olivia’s open about how terrible she is.”

“That’s a fair point,” Maxwell conceded. “She’s definitely crafty.”

“That’s one way to put it."

Noticing Madeleine and Olivia had moved on, Maxwell and Drake returned to where Riley and Hana were standing.

“Welcome, everyone,” rang out Bertrand’s clear voice. “If you’ll please take your seats, dinner will begin shortly.”

"That’s my cue. I have a seat in the back,” Drake said, pointing to his table, “so I’ll see you after dinner.”

“And I’d better go and take my seat with the other ladies,” chimed in Hana.

Riley pouted, “I wish we could have all sat together.”

Drake touched her arm lightly. “Hey, don’t look so disappointed, Addams. You’re sitting with royalty. I learned a long time ago I don’t fit in there.” He sighed in resignation. “But don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll be able to handle one dinner without us.”

“Right...” Riley replied dubiously.

"We’ll catch up later!” Hana reassured her.

On his way to his unglamorous table, Drake overheard Olivia whine, “What am I doing back here?” He automatically made eye contact with Riley across the room and they both burst into laughter. 

Still chucking he sat down at a table with Bastien and other guards.

He tuned out most of the conversation throughout the meal, focusing instead on the food and drink. He had to admit, dinner hadn’t been half bad, considering it was fancy rich people nonsense. The champagne was the best part, though.

Feeling slightly less grumpy thanks to the food and – in large part – to the alcohol, he felt ready to start a conversation.

"So, Bastien,” he turned to his right, “did you find the person behind the photos?”

“Not yet. I haven’t been able to get ahold of the reporter to whom they were being sold,” the older man grimaced, clearing his plate.

“Bummer.” What Bastien had said reminded Drake of something else. “Oh, hey, what’s this I hear about a reporter being caught inside the grounds at the Manor? It it true?”

He gathered from Bastien’s exasperated sigh that it was.

“What the hell, Bastien?! Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was under the impression that I reported to Prince Liam, not to you,” Bastien snapped with ice in his voice.

Drake was momentarily hurt into silence. The fact that he’d specifically said he reported to Liam instead of King Constantine seemed designed to make him feel smaller. Bastien sighed again and put a hand on his shoulder; Drake resisted the urge to brush it off.

“It was nothing, all right? I figured you had enough on your mind and didn’t want to add to it because of a meaningless incident. She was caught and promptly escorted out. End of story.”

“How can you be sure she didn’t do anything? Take pictures or... I don’t know.”

“Drake, we made sure, trust me.”

Bastien met his eyes earnestly. Drake felt ashamed at having doubted his old friend. 

Why would he tell you anyway? What have you ever done? 

He shook his head as if to rid himself of that spiteful little voice.

"I have had a lot on my mind lately,” he admitted. “What with Liam’s Coronation, and Riley–”

“I see Lady Kiara is still taken with you.”

“Wh-what?”

He whipped his head around to the suitors’ table and saw Lady Kiara engrossed in a conversation with Hana.

“What are you talking about? She’s not even looking this way.”

“You just missed it.” Bastien clicked his tongue regretfully. “I think she’d be good for you, if you don’t mind my saying.”

“Uh, really?”

“Definitely! She is charming and intelligent, and I’m sure I have heard you mention her physical, er, attributes.”

“Yeah, Bastien, she’s hot, you can say it.”

“I will not. But I hope you take my meaning.”

“Now that the dessert course has been served, the grand hall is now open,” came Bertrand’s voice from the main table. “Please join us there for the after-dinner festivities!”

Standing up, Bastien patted his shoulder before leaving the ballroom along with his men to take his position in the main hall, where the party was to be held. Drake filed out of the ballroom alone and stood among the crowd anonymously as Bertrand continued giving unnecessary speeches.

“Citizens, nobles, friends, we’ve gathered here today to celebrate the end of the social season. So if you’ll hear me out, I’d like to share a few words...”

At this point, Drake’s attention drifted. 

There’s only so much noble rambling I can take in one night. 

He looked around and spotted Liam at the very front with his family. He wasn’t eager to join the King and Queen, so he kept searching the crowd. Hana was carrying what seemed like a tiresome conversation with Lady Penelope. Drake shuddered. 

I’d rather be alone than talk about poodles. 

Left with no other choices, he looked for Maxwell.

Disconcerted, he realized his friend was not part of the crowd. 

Where the hell is he?

Bertrand’s voice, once again, broke through his confusion, “... and so, with all of House Beaumont with me, let us propose a toast!”

Drake finally spotted Maxwell coming up the stairs carrying a mace. Close behind him – his eyes widened – was Riley, valiantly hauling a battle axe that looked like it weighed about as much as she did.

“To our gracious royal family...” Bertrand continued.

“To all those here tonight!” Maxwell added.

“And to the PARTTYYYY!” Riley yelled, hoisting the battle axe up precariously. “Let’s rock this place to the ground!”

“YEEEAAAHHH!” Maxwell pumped his fists.

He swung the mace at the champagne, shattering the bottle.

“We’ve never let a lost bottle stop us before. Bring out another!” called Bertrand to the staff.

“WOOOOOOOO!” Maxwell was almost buzzing with frantic energy, his hand and bottom half soaked in champagne.

Riley gripped her axe and sliced with difficulty at the bottle. Perhaps because it was so heavy and thus she had very little momentum, she managed to hack the cork clean off. Champagne immediately bubbled out and she took a drink directly from it. Beginner’s luck, scoffed Drake, though he had to admit to being a little impressed.

Maxwell, on the other hand, was very impressed, and possibly a bit jealous, “Whoa... It took me much longer to master that move.”

“From all of us at House Beaumont... thank you!” Bertrand brandished the bottle Riley had opened at the crowd and they cheered in unison. Waiters marched into the room with tray upon tray of champagne. 

Thank God. 

Drake’s pleasant buzz had begun to subside and he knew he was only a few sober minutes away from getting sulky. 

Meanwhile, Maxwell had raced to the top of the stairs.

“... Maxwell!” Bertrand said.

“What?” Maxwell called back.

“Let the revelry begin!”

“AWWWWWWWWW YEAH!” yelled the younger Beaumont, sliding down the banister.

Deafening pop music blared all around the room, and professional dancers and acrobats, dressed in colorful, circus-like costumes, made their entrance. The room now felt twice as crowded.

Drake stood in his spot, back against the wall, gulping down the champagne he’d snagged from a passing waiter. He didn’t notice his friends walking over to him until Liam spoke, “So, enjoying the party, Drake?”

“It’s been less than two minutes, and my ears hurt...” he grumbled.

Liam elbowed him, “Come on, Drake, you usually give it at least five minutes before tapping out.”

I usually don’t have a crush on the girl you’re marrying.

“There’s so much happening,” Hana marveled.

Drake rolled his eyes. “That’s the problem.”

As if on cue, he heard Bertrand shout, “Bring out the horses!”

“The horses!” Maxwell echoed.

“The horses?! You’re bringing horses in here?!” Riley asked over the music.

“Who’s ready for a little horse riding?” Bertrand led the horses to the center of the room.

“I am!” Maxwell piped up.

“Great...” Drake shook his head. He hated this tradition of theirs. The poor horses couldn’t understand what was happening and were obviously spooked. 

Fucking nobles and their “eccentricities”.  

Maxwell, already mounted, asked, “Who will be my partner?”

“How about our king-to-be?” suggested Bertrand.

“I nominate Drake as my proxy.”

If looks could kill, Cordonia would have found itself without an heir. Liam held back a laugh at Drake’s irritation, but the latter merely said, “Oh, no, you’re not forcing me into the saddle tonight.”

Hana chose that moment to say, “I vote for Riley!”

“Riley!” Maxwell repeated.

“Come on up then, Lady Riley.” Bertrand offered her his hand. “Your saddle awaits.”

Riley was helped onto the horse, which whinnied uneasily. “Easy, girl.” 

Riley scratched the horse’s mane and that seemed to help calm it down. She then led it in a gentle turn around the room.

She and Maxwell waved at the crowds.

"My fellow Cordonians, take a picture!” Riley proclaimed. “I want everyone to see my noble horseback pose.”

Drake snorted at that. She wasn’t a bad rider and her pose was not terrible but it was a far cry from “noble” as she put it. Not for the first time, he found himself wishing he could teach her better, before clamping down on that dumb instinct.

“Phones are not allowed inside these parties. Nobody wants to see embarrassing pictures of themselves in the news.”

Bertrand was right; phones were not allowed and yet... there were always exceptions, weren’t there? He thought back to Maxwell’s video of him dancing to Hayley Rose and felt his face grow warm. A lot more sinister were the pictures of the bachelor party that someone had tried to sell for profit.

“I’ll take mental pictures for you,” Hana consoled her.

After going around the room once more for their adoring fans, Maxwell said, “We should let some others ride around on the horses.”

“Fair enough.” Riley dismounted and made a beeline for Drake.

“Drake! I feel like I haven’t see you all day.”

That’s ‘cause I’ve been avoiding you.

“Well, you’re seeing me know,” he replied, noncommittal, looking down at his champagne.

“Yeah and guess what? I wish your face didn’t look like you just swallowed a lemon.”

He looked up sharply at that, eyes narrowed, and Riley laughed. As per usual, her laugh was too contagious to resist and he ended up chuckling along.

“See? That’s better,” she smiled and brushed her fingers against his. He stopped laughing instantly. 

“I need a drink.”

“Me too! I’ll come with!” 

He groaned a little but could think of no way to dissuade her without hurting her feelings, so he let her follow him to the makeshift bar.

He opened his mouth to order whiskey, when Riley elbowed him aside and spoke over him. “Do not give this man whiskey. Do not. We’ll have two shots instead.”

The bartender looked at her expectantly. When Riley didn’t elaborate, he asked, “Shots of what?”

“Surprise us.” Riley turned to Drake and smiled with that mischievous glint in her eyes. “Scared, Drake?”

“Pff, I can drink you under the table, no problem.”

“Then how about a bet?”

“What? Another one? We both have bets we never settled!”

“Then I guess they cancel each other out!”

“You just wanna get out of paying up, Addams.”

“How dare you! I’ll remember this insult against my honor when you lose, you know?”

Drake put on a whiny voice and begged, “Oh, please don’t, I’m so scared. I’m sorry I insulted your honor, Lady Riley the Waitress.”

“That’s Head Waitress to you, grumpy commoner.”

They were so busy trying to stare each other down, they didn’t realize their shots were ready. The bartender cleared his throat awkwardly. 

Drake turned to him, “Er, right sorry,” and grabbed the two shot glasses.

Handing Riley hers, he proposed, “Okay, how about whoever makes a face or shows any difficulty in swallowing this, loses?”

Riley put on her best poker face, though he noticed her lips were still twitching. “You’re on.”

They clinked their glasses, maintaining eye contact the whole time – I have to, for the bet! – and then threw their heads back. The base was definitely vodka. Drake had only negative experiences from his teenage years to associate with that spirit, but he powered through his body’s rejection of it. 

Riley was not faring as well; for a moment it seemed like she might actually throw it back up. In the end, she managed to keep it down, but she couldn’t help the pronounced grimace on her face as she did.

“HA! I knew it!”

“No! I demand a redo! I cannot handle vodka, okay? My body hates it!”

“Rules are rules, Addams, don’t tell me you’d back down from a bet? Surely your honor wouldn’t allow it,” he teased.

She took a step forward, “Well, maybe I’m not so honorable...”

Drake licked his lips unconsciously. “Neither am I.”

He hadn’t realized when it happened, but his breath had quickened. He felt his hand rising as if of its own accord, reaching toward her, to touch her.

A familiar tall figure was approaching them from behind Riley.

“I better go. Wouldn’t want to interrupt your time with the prince,” Drake said, leaving hurriedly back to the bar and ordering whiskey.

Leaning against it, he had a prime view of Liam and Riley talking. He went to take a swig of his whiskey only to find it empty. He ordered another one straight away. When the bartender handed it to him, he saw Olivia interrupt the couple.

Yes! Go Olivia! Oh my God, what the fuck. I’m actually happy to see Olivia. 

Before leaving with a person that Drake considered to be in his personal bottom three and yet felt like hugging right now, Liam kissed Riley on the cheek. Drake downed his whiskey and ordered the next.

The rest of the party went by in a blur of alcohol, dancing – or, in Drake’s case, being forced to dance by Maxwell – and crazy hijinks, like trying to shoot an arrow through an apple on a bust’s head. 

Nobody could do it. They hit other things, though... The bust, mostly. But there was an exciting moment when Penelope, swaying, very nearly hit Maxwell. He wouldn’t have been badly hurt – the arrows were blunt – and it hadn’t even brushed him, yet he still took it upon himself to act out a Shakespearean death scene, much to everyone’s amusement. 

Drake hadn’t even tried. His level of drunkenness paired with how bad he was at archery at the best of times was a recipe for disaster; even drunk him knew that.

The party felt like it was winding down. Lady Kiara was sitting on the floor in the corner, moaning, “Too... too much... Je ne me sens pas bien.”

Penelope, in the meantime, was leaning against one of the horses, going, “You know, horse. You and I have so much in common... hair, bodies, an adoration of poodles. You’re like my equine soulmate.” She seemed to doze off at that point.

Liam and Olivia were chatting in very loud voices. Well, Olivia was; Liam was talking maybe a tiny bit louder than he normally would, but his cheeks were far more rosy than usual.

Bertrand was sitting against a column with an empty champagne bottle in one hand – Drake didn’t doubt he’d drank it all himself – and a sword in the other.

“We gave those apples what for,” he said proudly to no one in particular.

Maxwell, to no one’s surprise, was still dancing while Riley and Hana looked on, amazed at his energy.

Drake walked over, hoping the fact that everyone was pretty drunk meant he could go. “It’s over. I’m finally free.”

Maxwell stopped dancing and wheeled around to face Drake. “What do you mean ‘it’s over’? The party is just getting started.”

“Lady Penelope is literally talking to a horse,” he nodded toward her. “The party has done its job.”

"Your mane is so soft,” she was saying as she ran her fingers through it. “You have to tell me who does your hair.”

“Back home, this was always about the time we’d break out a game of Truth or Dare, but I bet you guys are too classy for that!” Riley raised an eyebrow.

“You’d be betting wrong! I love Truth or Dare.” 

Of course Maxwell would love a party game.

“’Truth or Dare’?” Hana met Drake’s eyes; they both seemed to be thinking the same thing: Truths could mean trouble. “That sounds dangerous...”

“Well... only if you have something to hide...” shrugged Riley. Drake almost laughed. “Or a fear of embarrassing stunts...”

She looked at Hana beseechingly and the latter couldn’t resist, “It sounds... Fun!” 

Normally, Drake wouldn’t blame her, he knew by now how powerless he was to resist Riley’s requests but... 

Dammit, Hana! Not after yesterday!

Riley took Hana’s hands, “I can’t believe you’ve never played! Now we’ve go to do it.”

Drake shook his head over and over. “Oh no. I’m not playing Truth or Dare.”

“Come on, Drake, we should do it for Hana,” pleaded Riley.

Hana backtracked politely, “I don’t want to pressure you guys into doing something on my behalf.”

“But I would!” said Maxwell. “Do it! Do it!”

“I see where this is going...” Drake was already rubbing his face tiredly, waiting for what he knew was coming.

“Drake! Drake! Drake!”

Aaand there it is. Does this man ever not chant?!

“Okay... fine. I’ll play, just stop chanting my name.”

“Whoohoo! Someone’s going streaking tonight!” Maxwell wiggled his eyebrows.

“We can play in my room!” Hana offered, and she led the way upstairs.

Drake and Maxwell followed suit. Riley, for all her talk, lingered behind. 

Waiting for Liam? 

He didn’t know what to feel if that was the case. On the one hand, relief that he wouldn’t have to play a risky drinking game with her; on the other, pure, uncontrollable jealousy. 

Who am I kidding? I’m no closer to controlling this stupid crush than I am to controlling the fucking weather. 

To his immense relief and despite his hesitancy to play Truth or Dare with her, Riley joined them soon in Hana’s room. They were all sitting crosslegged on the floor in a circle. Riley took a spot between Hana and Maxwell, facing Drake.

“This is so exciting! How do we start?” asked Hana.

“Usually with a few drinks,” Drake replied.

“Oooh, there’s a full bar!” said Hana, noticing it for the first time. 

We are very different people. 

“What do you guys want?” she asked.

“Make me something fruity and delicious!” requested Maxwell. “I know! I want Sex on the Beach!”

Hana’s hand went to her mouth, her cheeks turning red, “Oh my! I don’t think...”

“It’s a drink...” explained Maxwell hastily. “Never mind, I’ll make it myself.” He stood up and joined her at the minibar.

“I’ll just have–”

Riley cut Drake off, “Let me guess. Whiskey.”

Drake rubbed the back of his neck, feeling his face heat up, “I’m getting predictable, aren’t I?”

“Maybe just a little bit,” she said with a small smile.

“What about you, Riley?” asked Hana. 

“I’ll have a whiskey, too,” she winked at Drake, who couldn’t help grinning back.

Hana poured two whiskeys and a glass for champagne for herself, while Maxwell mixed himself a bright orange drink.

“Cheers, friends! Thank you for joining me tonight!” Hana extended her hand to the center of the circle.

“Cheers.” Drake followed.

Maxwell added, “To friendship!”

“To friendship!” agreed Riley, clinking her glass to the others’. “And Truth or Dare!”

Drake drank deeply, remembering what they were all there for. “Oh boy, this is going to be a long night.”

“Drinks have been accomplished! Now, what comes next?” Hana looked at them expectantly.

“Someone goes first,” said Maxwell.

“Addams should start.” Drake pointed at her. “This was her idea.”

Maxwell turned to her, “Okay, Riley... truth or dare?”

“I choose Truth.”

“I was hoping you’d say that.” Maxwell rubbed his hands together with relish. “I’ve got a great one for you. If you were stranded on a desert island, where you’ll never see anyone or any civilization ever again... Which one of us would you want with you?”

Riley pretended to think for a moment, tapping an exaggerated finger to her chin, then announced, “I’d want Drake!”

He could not have been more taken aback. He knew they were on good terms now, maybe even more than that if yesterday was anything to go by, but there was no denying he was a difficult person to be around, let alone be stuck with. 

“Me? Be honest, Addams, you just want me there so I’m suffering as much as you are.”

“Mostly just to see how you’d look in a grass skirt,” she smirked.

“Hey!” Drake threw a nearby cushion at her, which she deflected with her arm, laughing. 

“Ha ha!” Drake allowed Maxwell to laugh for a second before glaring at him.

“Just kidding. I think you’d be gruff and grumpy, but deep down, when it counts, you’d probably save me from a tiger or something,” continued Riley.

“Well, I’d feel terrible if a tiger ate my only companion,” joked Drake.

“And there wouldn’t be any nobles around, or courtly intrigue, or gossip...” Riley was now looking intensely at him, as if trying to say something other than what her words conveyed. “In fact, I think you might enjoy being stranded more than palace life.”

Staring into those hypnotizing blue eyes, all Drake could think was that he’d sell several body parts if it meant he could be alone with Riley anywhere. Even a deserted island.

The corner of his lip quirked up, “You never know.”

“Okay, Maxwell, it’s your turn.” Riley broke their eye contact before the others could wonder if there was something else to the innocent answer. “Truth or dare?”

“Dealer’s choice! I’m not afraid of anything!” 

“Okay, then, tell us a secret that no one else knows about you.”

Maxwell’s bravado faded right away. “Aw, I’m an open book! Everyone knows everything about me!”

Drake scoffed, thinking back to how weird Maxwell had been just the day before. “Nope.”

He caught Riley’s eye and she nodded, remembering the same thing. “Not true at all.”

“We know almost nothing about you!” countered Hana.

“Well, all anyone ever had to do was ask. Okay, let’s see...” Maxwell reflected for a moment, then said, “I hate carousels.”

“Really?” asked Riley, incredulous. “I thought everyone loved carousels...”

Maxwell elaborated, “When I was little, the royal court took all the kids to a theme park for the Prince’s birthday. But when we were on the carousel, some reporters got in and mobbed us. The security team did their best to get us all out of there, but I was the last one they got to. So I was stuck on this dumb carousel for what seemed like forever with people taking pictures and shouting questions at me.” 

He had a glassy look in his eyes, as if transported back to the horror of helplessly riding a fake horse round and round. 

“I was only three... I had no idea what was really going on. And because our parents had spent so much time trying to warn us about dangers, I thought I was about to get murdered.”

Riley leaned her head on his shoulder, “Aww... Maxwell...”

He shook himself. “I’m fine. I was a long time ago.”

“Still...” Hana sounded disproportionately concerned.

“Aw, geez, this is why I don’t like to talk about serious stuff. I’m fine, you guys!” Maxwell reassured them. “Just forget it! Next up... Hana, truth or dare?”

It struck Drake that this was something Maxwell did all the time and he was an expert at it: seemingly divulging information about himself while at the same time withholding anything of meaning. The fact remained that he had no idea what his friend was going through right now and likely wouldn’t find out anytime soon if Maxwell insisted on bottling it up. Not that he was a model of mental health.

He turned his attention back to the game. Hana had just decided, “Oh... um... truth!”

“Tell us about your first kiss,” said Maxwell.

Hana bit her lip. “My first kiss?”

“You have been kissed, right?” Maxwell asked curiously. 

Tactful.

Hana’s brow furrowed. “Yes, of course.”

“You were engaged, after all!” Riley shot Maxwell a reproachful look.

“Well... it was actually a very chaste courtship. Our first kiss was in front of a professional photographer for our engagement photo shoot. My parents were insistent that we publish a very public announcement in all of the papers. It was... somewhat awkward,” she finished, staring down at her hands.

“He wasn’t a great kisser?” grimaced Riley.

Hana sighed and said, “He missed.”

Drake had never been so confused. “Missed? How?”

“He kissed my ear. Well, he punctured his lip on my earring, actually. He started bleeding. I felt terrible. My parents were furious that he ruined my dress. It was a complete disaster.”

Drake had been about to burst out laughing, when he caught a subtle shake of Riley’s head. 

Okay, not the time. 

He carefully avoided looking at Maxwell, whom he knew would also be close to laughter. One glance and they’d both cave.

“Hana, you deserved a better first kiss than that!” Riley put her arm around Hana. Drake saw her smile in absolute delight, holding Riley’s hand.

“Thank you, Riley. But it wasn’t so bad. Looking back, it was actually pretty funny. I mean, who can miss that badly on a kiss?”

Feeling like he had permission, Drake laughed, expecting Maxwell to join him. However, he only gave a small, “Hah!” 

Drake turned to him questioningly and Maxwell continued, “I know. I mean. What a loser...”

By now, Drake was excellent at knowing when his friend was hiding something. “Maxwell...”

Maxwell sighed and slumped his shoulders, “Okay, maybe I accidentally kissed someone’s chin but that’s, like, a totally understandable mistake, right? I mean, it’s right below the mouth...”

Hana did an amazing job of containing her laughter, only letting out a small giggle, “Hee hee. Yes, that’s completely normal.”

Riley and Drake however, were not so considerate, howling with laughter.

Annoyed after a minute of this, Maxwell talked loudly over their subsiding laughter, “Okay, my turn again! Riley, I dare you to go streak through the ballroom in your underwear!”

Uh oh.

The exact same thought seemed to have crossed Hana’s mind for her eyes widened and she glanced at Drake instantly. Fuck. I cannot see Addams in her underwear again. I might spontaneously combust.

Hana beat him to the punch, “That’s not fair! It’s not her turn.”

“Yeah, and she didn’t even choose ‘dare’,” Drake pointed out

“Well someone should streak tonight or this game is a bust. Come now, Riley, it’s your game. Who will it be?” asked Maxwell.

This time, she didn’t even pretend to think, “Drake.”

He rolled his eyes at her and felt his face grow warm.

“You trying to see me shirtless, Addams?”

“Not if you run fast enough!” she said cheerfully.

The group went down to the now deserted ballroom. The tables had already been cleared by the palace staff, leaving a vast, empty room perfect for something like running around half naked.

“The things I do for you people.” It had been his constant refrain lately, yet Drake had to admit that the phrase should be singular. It’s not like he’d do this just for Maxwell or Hana, as much as he liked them.

He took off his shirt and pants and stood there for a split second in his gray boxer briefs. He thought he saw Riley’s eyes glint.

Fuck it, let’s get this over with.

He sprinted the length of the room, the cool air feeling nice throughout his whole body. He realized he hadn’t known how drunk he was until this moment, when running proved more difficult than he’d anticipated. He managed not to trip, but it was a close thing.

“Woo! Go Drake!” Riley cheered from the other side of the room.

He ran back to them and stopped.

“Satisfied?”

“Yep!” said Maxwell, “Now what?”

Riley grinned. “I’m going to join in!” 

For the love of God, NO.

She took her clothes off efficiently and yet even then, Drake couldn’t help but think how sexy her confidence was.

Fuck me, now she’s in her bra and undies. I’m gonna die. That’s it. RIP Drake Walker.

It took all of his concentration and strength not to look below her face at her amazing, perky breasts in a black bra; at her long, shapely legs; and most of all, at her ass, whose every tempting curve was hugged by her matching underwear.

“We can’t make Drake be the only one. Come on, Hana!” urged Riley.

Yes! Yes, that might make this feel more normal. More like a “friend” thing.

“Hee hee... okay! It does look fun!”

Hana took her clothes off as well. Drake barely registered her creamy underwear, although he would have to be an idiot not to see that she was a beautiful woman too.

“Let’s go!” Hana gestured for them to run.

Riley turned back, “Maxwell?”

“I’ll be the photographer.”

“Maxwell!”

“I mean, I’ll stand guard!”

The three of them took off running and immediately, Drake felt better. The other two were nothing but a blur and so he could be just a normal guy having fun with his friends, rather than a commoner pining for the prince’s fiancée-to-be.

“Wooooooooo!” squealed Riley.

“Freeeeeedom!” roared Drake.

Hana shouted, “Truth or Dare!”

They ran the length of the room twice and then collapsed next to Maxwell, out of breath and with spinning heads.

“Wow, that took a lot out of me,” mumbled Riley.

“Me too. I need to lie down.” said Hana, a hand on her head.

They returned to her room, carrying their clothes. The four friends threw themselves on Hana’s bed, resting for a moment. Drake found himself lying down next to Riley. Her head was resting on her arm and she was staring at him. She reached out and brushed his bare chest with her fingers.

He exhaled sharply and sprang off the bed. The others took this as a sign to do the same and got dressed. Riley stayed on the bed a moment longer, then put her clothes on as well. 

“I can’t believe we just did that!” Hana was flushed and her hair was wilder than Drake had ever seen it. She also looked happier than ever.

Drake ruffled her hair further. “Ah, the magic of Truth or Dare.”

“This was so much fun tonight! Thank you,” she said to them all.

Riley smiled. “Any time.”

“Yeah, you know me. I don’t need much of an excuse to party.” Maxwell did the robot. 

“And I’m... still not sure why I came this time, but I guess I’d do it again.” It had been a risk, and it had almost gotten too dangerous, but nothing happened.

“Drake, I think we’re graduating from friends to best friends!” Hana beamed.

Drake put his hands up defensively, “Whoa, whoa, whoa... Let’s not get ahead of ourselves.”

“I dunno, man. We all drink together, goof off together, spend most of our time together...” Maxwell nudged him.

“No...”

Hana squeezed Drake’s arm. “It’s too late, Drake. We are best friends!”

“I guess I’m just going to have to accept this, huh?”

“It’s probably for the best. You could do much worse than the three of us,” said Riley.

Oh, I know. It’s you guys who should be thinking this twice.

“That’s true, isn’t it?” He sighed. “Okay. You got me.”

“Yay!” exclaimed Maxwell. 

"Yay!” echoed Hana.

Drake crossed his arms. “Please tell me this isn’t a thing we do now.”

Riley patted his arm, reassuring him. “This is not a thing.”

“Thank God. At least someone still has some sanity.”

“I’ve got your back.” She gave him one last squeeze before letting go.

Hana stifled a yawn behind her hand.

“Okay... we should probably call it a night before we break Hana...” Maxwell said, concerned. 

Hana nodded. “Good night! This has been a very memorable evening!” She waved goodbye to everyone as they prepared to leave her room.

“Good night, guys,” Drake said.

“G’night!” Riley repeated.

Once in the hallway, Maxwell went left, while Riley and Drake went the opposite way.

“So, that was fun, right?”

Drake only grunted in response, cursing nobles internally for having such big houses. He couldn’t be alone with her.

“What’s up with you? I feel like you’ve been avoiding me all day.”

“Uh, no, I haven’t.”

It wasn’t exactly convincing, but she couldn’t prove anything.

“Are you tired?”

Drake answered, “Nah,” before thinking, Shit. Why didn’t I just say yes?!

“Cool, me neither. Let’s have a drink.”

She pulled him into her room and he found that he didn’t feel like fighting her. Without asking, she poured them both whiskey and they sat down on a futon.

“Truth or Dare?” she asked softly.

“Dare.”

“Down your whiskey.”

“Come on, Addams, at least make it a challenge.” He was just bragging. His throat actually felt like it was on fire and his head hadn’t stopped spinning since the ballroom. He was extremely drunk already.

“Truth or Dare?” It was his turn to ask.

“Dare.”

“Same thing.”

She rolled her eyes at him and gulped down her drink. She managed to swallow all of it, but she had a coughing fit. He thumped her back, although he wasn’t sure that even did anything.

She stopped coughing, but he didn’t remove his hand; she didn’t seem to mind.

“Your turn.” Her voice was still hoarse from the whiskey.

“Truth.”

Fuck it. Hope this doesn’t bite me in the ass.

“Are you mad at me?”

Her voice was so small, he could barely keep himself from squeezing her. 

I can’t even blame her for thinking that. I’m such an asshole.

“No. And I’m sorry for making you think that.”

She seemed to be waiting for him to add something, but that was as far as he was willing to go, so she nodded.

“Truth.”

“Do you miss home?”

She was quiet for a long moment. Drake thought he could hear a clock ticking, but he couldn’t see one. He wondered idly what time it was. Late, but how late? He didn’t dare check his phone at that moment.

Finally, she sighed and spoke, “What is home, anyway? I don’t really have anyone, so no.”

She was leaning into him now, his hand still on her back.

“I’m sorry, if you don’t want to–”

“No, I do. It’s actually kind of a relief to be asked. I know my life is a million times better here than it ever was in New York, but sometimes it sucks that people just assume I’m happier here.”

“Aren’t you?”

“No, I am! I definitely am but...”

Drake waited again until she was ready to continue.

“Remember back in Olivia’s estate? When we went out before the storm?”

You mean the moment I knew I was falling for you, even if I was in denial? Yep.

“Sure,” he replied.

“I told you I knew what it was like to feel like you failed someone.”

“Yeah,” his voice was barely audible. He had been wondering about that but it seemed serious and he didn’t want to push her. He figured she’d tell Liam about it, rather than him.

“I... had a younger brother. Growing up we were really close, but then I left for college and we kind of drifted apart. I thought I could justify it, being a busy college student and all that but... He started having a hard time and I–I didn’t even know about it.”

She squeezed her lips together and continued, “One day I got a call at school that my little brother,” her voice wobbled, “had killed himself.”

Tears were now escaping her eyes, falling too fast and hard to roll down her cheeks. Drake realized he’d been rubbing circles on her back for the past few minutes.

She shook her head. “I didn’t even think to check up on him and I knew depression ran in the family.” She put her head in her hands and took a deep breath. “In his note he asked me to forgive him. As if it were him I needed to forgive.”

She let out a small sob, her face still hidden. A few seconds later, she wiped her tears and spoke, her voice still unsteady, “Coming here, I was just running away from my guilt. But I’m happy for the first time in years thanks to you guys, and you’ve helped me believe I do deserve it, despite everything... I haven’t completely forgiven myself, but I’m closer than I’d ever been.”

She gave him a watery smile. “So thanks, for everything.” She squeezed his hand.

He could not believe she was smiling. The horror, the trauma of losing a loved one in such a way and yet she still found something to be grateful for. He felt his own throat closing up, overwhelmed with affection and admiration. Unable to speak, he squeezed her hand back.

They stayed that way for a few minutes, with her head on his shoulder and his hand stroking her back. 

She sniffed and stood up, walking to the mirror. “God, I’m a mess!”

Drake went to stand behind her. “I think a pink nose suits you.” 

She giggled. “And to think I might have met Liam looking like this!” 

Drake’s smile died on his lips. Right. Liam.

“Listen, if you’re feeling okay I should leave you to it.”

“Oh, um, yeah, I’m fine.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah, it felt good to tell someone.”

So she hadn’t told anyone? Not even Liam?

He entertained that thought for a second and then shook himself.

It doesn’t matter. You can be her confidant; she’ll still marry Liam. And that’s okay. Having her in your life is enough, but you need to forget about anything romantic happening between you. She deserves no less than a fucking kingdom.

“You should go meet Liam. I bet you can still make it.”

“You... think I should?” Her expression was unreadable.

“Yeah.” So was his.

His feet carried him to the bar, where he ordered shot after shot. He lost count. His bed was only a few feet away, so he could get as drunk as he wanted. As drunk as it would take to forget about Riley for a second. To forget about her bravery and resilience, her vulnerability, her warmth. 

We can be friends. We have to be friends, I can’t lose her. I just have to find somebody else.

As if planned, Kiara plopped down on the stool next to him. He couldn’t really focus her properly, but he still knew she looked beautiful as ever.

“Drake! I haven’t seen you all night!” Her speech was not as proper as usual, maybe even a bit slurred, but Drake was in no condition to notice.

“Theeeerrre you are, mylittlecroissant.” He had no idea he was barely intelligible at this point. Kiara didn’t seem to mind, anyway. “Voulez-vous choucher avec moi?”

“I thought you’d never ask!”

They finished their drinks and Kiara moved to his lap. He didn’t see the bartender leave, but he must have. Drake crashed his lips clumsily onto hers, their teeth accidentally clashing. She responded enthusiastically, her tongue entering his mouth. They made out sloppily, his hands roaming her body.

She pulled him closer by his shirt and let her hands stroke his chest, going lower and lower. She brushed his inner thigh and he felt his cock stir in his pants.

He jumped up from his seat, making her fall to the floor.

“Oh! Sorry, sorry, sorry!” He apologized over and over again as he helped her up.

“Kiara, yeeer great, ya know? Like, s-superrr cool an’ev’rything but I can’t. I juss can’t.”

He left her standing there and stumbled back to his room as fast as his condition allowed him. 

As soon as he was through the threshold, he slammed the door and leaned against it, breathing heavily. His hand trembling with need, he undid his zipper, pulled out his cock and took himself in his hand. 

He started out slowly, just savoring the feeling. Then, without meaning to, he let himself imagine what a smaller, softer hand would feel like. His hand moved faster. Unbidden, an image of Riley in her black underwear and matching bra came to him and he was powerless to stop it. His hand moving at a feverish pace, he had to clench his jaw to stop himself from crying out.

Still, he couldn’t help groaning, “Addams!” through clenched teeth as he spilled all over his hand.

Steadying his breath, he cleaned himself up and staggered to bed, already knowing his future self was going to regret so much of what happened that night.

I’m so fucked.

[strideofpride]

#if i ever stop reblogging this scene just assume i'm dead#i've said so much about this before but I still got more left in me#today it's: the layers of 'am i just setting her up for disappointment?'#a continuation of the very thin serena-shaped veil blair pulls over her self with#'she already likes you you know that' & 'how could she not love you?'#she is SO scared of her own feelings and so scared because it means that he has the capability to hurt her#which leads to 'tell me what will make you happy dan'#and as insane as that line makes me because THEY JUST WANT EACH OTHER TO BE HAPPY EVEN IF IT'S WITH SOMEONE ELSE#there's this other layer of:#she's pushing dan towards serena bc she thinks that will make him happy#because she's convinced that she won't#she's got priors after all: she didn't/couldn't make nate happy. or chip. or lewis.#but then dan gives her his answer: it's her! it's her it's her it's her it's her!!!#this is just...the culmination of so many things at once it makes me crazayyyyyyyy (via @mymindseessongs)

#going off of what liz said in prev tags#she’s doing for him here the same exact thing he did for her in 5.10#‘i just want you to be happy’ is such a non answer because of course she doesn’t just like he doesn’t want her to be with chuck#*doesn’t want him to get back with serena#but if that’s what’s going to make the other happy they wouldn’t stand in their way#they’ll push them towards happiness no matter the personal cost#and blair goes through all this convoluted trouble to make it happen because she’s so set on the idea that serena is who makes dan happy#both because of what liz said (i.e. she’s afraid she can’t) and because that’s the way It Has To Be#once again back to what i was saying about blair and being so tied to The Narrative#blair thinks it can’t be any other way#dan knows that not to be true#and he’s so tired of denying it and looking away from it and letting the narrative play out#he knows what makes him happy. and he holds it in his hands here. he tells her without words that the ending can be changed. it can be them.#there’s also the added layer of how it’s always dan finding blair secluding herself. bursting through the bubble of her loneliness and#spotting the chink in her armour#but here she looks for him; she finds him#and while this parallels all those scenes the scene it REALLY parallels is the one from last valentines#the two of them alone (both in rooms belonging to chuck) while the party goes on without them. but everything around them is still#both scenes play with light in a really beautiful way#but this time. this time. when he reaches for she doesn’t pull away (via @mysteriesofloves)

DAIR REWATCH ⇢ 5.15 Crazy, Cupid, Love

[manicpanicpixienightmare]

I posted 19,699 times in 2021

45 posts created (0%)

19654 posts reblogged (100%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 436.8 posts.

I added 237 tags in 2021

#elena - 70 posts

#the real journal entry is in the tags - 41 posts

#i’m the girl who can make him worse - 20 posts

#the pumpkin speaks - 19 posts

#shopping list - 17 posts

#milky boy - 16 posts

#lol - 15 posts

#penis face - 14 posts

#for mitch - 13 posts

#prev tags - 12 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#but i really would have preferred to get the lions mane and if he was gonna fuck up the other mushroom that’s an artistic vision i can reap

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

The UN just said that the window is closing to prevent “catastrophic” effects of climate change and like no shit??? Honestly the window is either already closed (in terms of slow moving policy decisions) or MUCH smaller than they’re even willing to admit.

Also, fucking DO something about it. The political elite is so concerned about their own myopic self-interest that they’re never going to be decisive enough to pivot to damage control policies in time.

3 notes • Posted 2021-08-09 12:20:37 GMT

#4

Adderall makes my heart beat like I am a small and terrified animal.

3 notes • Posted 2021-08-03 14:14:03 GMT

#3

You know, proposing a new site feature and then having all the users point out vulnerabilities/flaws in the design for you would be a galaxy brain move if tumblr staff were capable of implementing functional features in the first place.

4 notes • Posted 2021-07-22 12:05:11 GMT

#2

BABE happy valentine's day!!!!<333 i hope u are staying warm bc it's fucking FREEZING out there like...oh midwest gang<3 we've followed each other for years and legitcherally my tumblr experience would not be the same without you on my dash. anyways...im like :pleading: portillos.......i cannot believe that covid took this away from us oaisjfdosa anyways i am shooting u w feel good vibes<33

😭

Happy belated Valentine’s to you too!!! You’re one of my favorite blogs to see every day. Your tags are hilarious and I enjoy seeing what fandoms you’re getting into lately with absolutely zero context 💕

I am returning fire with my good vibes cannon. There is no escape 😈

4 notes • Posted 2021-02-15 22:32:24 GMT

#1

My job on the leftist commune is noticing a pet is going to puke and taking them outside.

5 notes • Posted 2021-07-22 01:30:46 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[jackiebrackettt]

@ prev tags i hope u don't mind me adding my thoughts ajdjs but yeah you explained so much of this better than me!! i feel like dream escaping and throwing a wrench in everything is like... we don't need that yet! we still need to set some stuff up! it'd feel like some arcs get a bit rushed - specifically the quackity versus wilbur thing. i think some of wilbur's stuff that u mentioned could come after dream is dealt with like as a way to wrap up his story but at this point with all the time passing it should prob happen as soon as possible lol and i think it would be almost better for him to like.. what's the opposite of burn bridges i can't remember - reconnect! it would prob be better for him to reconnect with ppl b4 dream escapes so then he might not be so insistent on helping dream bc dream saved him (although i think if wilbur found out about exile he'd try and kill dream himself)

and i'd like to have tubbo and tommy in more! i meant their story concludes after dream escapes and then they have a lil healing arc so when they show up in other stuff they don't feel like they need to be the centre bc a lot of their emotional stuff is sorta wrapped up if you know what i mean (my tumblr is doing that thing where i can't do question marks sorry)

like tubbo keeps doing stuff but bc cctubbo himself doesn't play on the dsmp much it's sorta more natural - he doesn't need to play a character but he can if needed! (/if improv lore gives him the opportunity) but then if he's not a major character in any of that or bc of scheduling it falls thru it doesn't feel like.. unsatisfying. bc his overall emotional arc has sorta ended (would LOVE for tubbo to kill dream<3 i am a simple tubbling i simply think it would be iconic of him to kill the guy who thinks he's nothing more than a pawn<3). i think with both him and tommy it would end on like an open-ended note where we get to see some of their healing process and then it's just sort of implied they're healing while the rest of the server/new members are doing their thing. thinking about it from a cc pov and what they'd be likely to do - again tubbo and maybe even tommy would prob show up in ranboo's lore if he can get around to doing it - whether that happens b4 dream breaks out, during, or after he's dealt with who knows

wrt beeduo balancing out prison breakout arc: true and real. i hope it happens! (you said beeduo twice but with an and/or so idk if their was another duo you meant question mark)

and i prob should've explained the timeline better lol but what i meant was tubbo and tommy both step back from being major characters/have their arcs fulfilled after dream is dealt with for good. the stream or two setting up their healing arc would hopefully address all the things that hasn't been addressed - like exile for eg (exile would hopefully be either addressed in the final defeat of dream, when he escapes, or afterward the whole thing idk up to them)

but yeah what i mean by "i think this character's arc could end" i mean like… after the lnv versus wilbur thing + after the whole dream thing - they just go on a massive healing storyline and then whoo nice we can imagine their life is going up from there! maybe sometimes we'll see them around on other storylines who knows. and i mostly say this bc they aren't like… playing much casually so they'd have to be booked into lore and if all that is happening in dms it's unlikely unless it's something they're already a part of

sorry if this is repetitive it's kinda late and i can't focus too well rn

thoughts on lore/dsmp plot (everyone characters unless stated otherwise):

-dream can't escape prison until we have at least one more maybe two more quackity and wilbur burger feud thing /srs the pacing would be really off since they only just established it. we need just like. a casual stream of the ppl involved doing their casual day-to-day burger competition working probably ending with another wilbur and quackity clash and GOD hopefully beeduo actually communicate and fix that convo from last time

-THEN you can add the variable of dream escaping since it will largely affect both characters - either wilbur will flock towards dream bc of dream's manipulations (dream saving him. not getting into but i will.) or wilbur will realise something is wrong and have to team up with quackity. or a secret third option who knows

-tubbo and tommy can have their storylines closed off sometime soon after this probably wilbur as well. they can make appearances for ranboo's lore/just when they want to chill on the sever

-preferably some kind of stream with tubbo and tommy (either together or separately) where they talk about healing or set up that they are healing or something so we can fill in the blanks in our minds if the story closes up here

-(i'm mostly saying their story should finish here bc neither really play and the only thing their characters have left to do is these 2 conflicts with lnv and paradise, and dream + then their healing arcs which like. yeah. same with wilbur tbh.)

anyway this is quick bc i need to go to work so i didn't read over this<3 feel free to give ur own thoughts