#pray wth me if you wanna...

[evorcy]

HELLO MY FAVOURITE PEOPLE, today I present to you a portrait of my OC Inga She is a princess of Aei people and she is gone missing at the moment. Inga died unexpectedly but her tomb is empty and people claim that she was seen very far away from home... hmm.. ALSO she's Aellinor's ex wife.. yeah Ael actually is a widow..

[necrotic-nephilim]

Okay, so MAYBE LATER DANCE by Jhariah for DickTim

https://youtu.be/9DVhOdqUMSo?si=YnxNQ-75HtibRRMv

Specifically the chorus: "I wanna be just like you

I'm mastering a mimicry of everything you do

A mask of mirrored imagery, absent of my misery"

Because Dick is Tim's idol. He's the person Tim's wants to be and models himself after and that can be so juicy in many ways.

oh i *love* this, actually. also ty for putting me on a song/artist i've never heard of <3

this song is so fun for like. a more obsessed Tim, i love the repeated lyric of "I'll do whatever it takes". i *love* Tim's idol worship of Dick Grayson so dearly, it is a foundation of DickTim. the song has a shyness in it's worship with the first verse that i love? sitting nervously just for the chance of getting looked at? begging for the person to just ask for your *name*? god i love it. would be fun to explore the angle of Tim always seeing Dick at galas and social events and never having the guts to talk to Dick on his own, but *praying* he'll have his little moment of Dick coming to him and introducing himself and wanting to know who Tim is.

i always love the fact wth DickTim, that Dick suggested Tim to be Robin. bc it means Dick is the one that Tim feels like he has to prove himself to, not Bruce. so him wanting to be like Dick, trying to mirror everything that Dick is in that "Robin is magic" sort of way. Tim's problems are easy to ignore when he's Robin, bc he doesn't have to be himself. he gets to be Dick's mirror, Dick's legacy.

i think the line "and you should bite your tongue 'cause i'd steal it just so i can be a muse" is *super* fun to get into the more unhealthy side of Tim's obsession/worship of Dick. how badly he wants to hold onto Robin, hold onto the pieces of Dick that he's been given and not let go. anything to stay in Dick's footsteps. even when Dick hurts Tim, he still wants to be Dick. his love for Dick is so layered, i'm obsessed with it. could also be interesting if that's part of why it takes Tim so long to realize his feelings include a crush, bc he's always perceived it as wanting to *be* Dick, not being in love with him. but what is being in love with something if not loving it so much you crave becoming it? he wants to consume Dick whole and be him bc then maybe he can love himself more. there's so much to be done with that complex.

[twistedwonderlandthoughts]

At the white rabbit fest

Announcer: let’s get a look at the fine contestants from NCR!

Silver and Deuce: we will win with grace and let our actions speak for us

Announce: WOW that is what I like to SEE! Such sportsmanship, these boys have it down!

Ortho: we will defeat you like villains from a storybook. Be prepared for your defeat.

Announcer: Alright, umm, the child has said something ominous and foreboding, always something we like to see- wth-

Epel: YOU WANNA THROW DOWN BOY?? Cause we can throw down right f@!:&/$ NOW!!!

Announcer: WHA- NO No No, we are live, can someone please tell me we censored that,- umm, we’re still live shit, yes yes, SUCH SPIRIT FROM THE NRC BOYS 👍 yes-

(Back at NRC watching these live announcements)

Crewel: I am moderately disappointed in you pups

Vargas: they’re totally gonna win

Trein: Mr. Flemair is going to get a talking to when he gets back. Not from me, but his house warden. He better pray that Vil doesn’t hear about this.

Crowley: they will bring great recognition to our school! Such helpful children!

Crewel: Oh please, you’re just happy they’re doing free advertisements.

[yarrystyleeza]

In A Heartbeat (M.M)

"I loved her, father, and her heartbeat was all it took for me to fall in love with her."

Taglist: @mindidjarin @acharliecoxedfan @v4leoftears @galaxies-and-moons-and-cox @itwasthereaminuteago @chronicoverachiever @mattmurdocks6thscaleapartment @chvoswxtch @bellaxgiornata @bunmurdock @bunmurdock-main @shouldbestudying41 @1988-fiend @xxdrixx @munsonownsmyass @shiorimakibawrites @devilsmurdock @saltedlays @babygirlmurdock @starxlightm

[series masterlist / main masterlist]

[Chapter Two: Fixing Ties]

Word count: 6.8k!

Warnings/tags for this chapter: typical show violence, use of guns, blood, the black suit is wet TWO TIMES (first one is implied, second is direct), "The Devil" grins a lot which fucks me up every time I picture him, big doses of fluff.

A/N: the long-waited chapter is finally up! Damn, it's been almost a year since I last updated this wth (literally July 12th of 2023)!!! It really took me a while to fill in the plot holes (aka sit my ass and think). I hope you all enjoy it, feedback is always appreciated! <333

There stood by the window frame, a male figure, one that this city has marked to be its savior, the masked vigilante that kept the evil hiding in its den. The man in black. The man without fear.

The Devil of Hell's Kitchen.

“This is bigger than you, kid,” the man had his gun imprinted in Madilyn's head. She closed her eyes, prayed for her death to be merciful.

“How about you let her go and fight me like a man?” The Devil walked slowly towards them. “And that's the only option you have.”

“You know she has nothing to do with this, McCarthy. Let her go, now.” Oh, Hell, Devil Boy, he was sure-footed. Although he got beaten to death the last time they crossed roads. But The Devil was certain of how things ought to end this time.

One minute he was here, the next he's gone. The large man looked around, loosened his grip on Madilyn, who took advantage to set herself free and take shelter behind the counter.

Her heart raced out of her chest—though she was safer now, she couldn’t help the anxiety that's crushing her pumper.

BANG!

The man hits the wall. But he's much stronger than The Devil. He pushes him aside, The Devil crashes into the bookshelf. But he gets back up quickly from under the piles of books and uses his weight to ram into the brick wall of a man and takes him to the ground, flipping the couch underneath them.

She rises a little to spy on the scene. A wooden baton shoots and flies over her head, smacking into the kitchen wall. She must stay down, and this is her warning.

“Stay down!” he shouts, confirming her suppositions. She's already a distraction with her racing heartbeat. It's crazy—but he wanted to let all this fight be damned, run up to her and hold her tight. He fears for her, he doesn’t want to witness her going through another episode and not being able to comfort her. But, he knows he is nothing more than a stranger —yes, he’s a savior, her savior, but he’s just... a stranger, and he knows it.

The adrenaline rushed back and forth in her veins like raging fire, almost bursting out of her skin. Her teeth grind, she’s shivering. Her heart raced, and the anxiety crawled all over her like ants running up the hill, numbing her limbs, freezing her body.

The Devil receives a good punch, throwing him off to the wall. He recalls her giggling and laughing in the rain. He smiles. She truly is a distraction. His jaw is slack. He spits blood. “You really wanna do this the hard way, don't you?” The Devil asked with his gravelly voice, gutting a giggle.

The man gets up and walks towards his bag, but The Devil takes him by surprise, strangling him with his wooden batons. The man overpowers him once again, breaking the hold he had on his neck and smacking The Devil to the wall.

The Devil wouldn't stop, he can't. If he was anything, he's a menace, a troublesome, a real pain in the ass—and he has to prove it tonight. He gets back on his feet, his boots thudding on the wooden floor. “I can do this all night...” he chuckles.

BANG!

The room bursted with the loud thuds of the men's conflicted fists, noises of clouts and punches whooshing in the air, combined with agonized grunts and groans—aside from the words they spat over each other.

She trembles. Sweat is running down her skin. Her teeth are grinding and clacking. Her body temperature isn't acting right. Her skin was hot, but her limbs were cold. It was distracting, once again. He listened, almost taking a punch when he did. He dodged it, aiming a blow in the direction of the intruder. He was larger than him, but that wouldn't stop The Devil from taking him down—he had to take him down.

She was scared. No, she was terrified. But what took over her mind was the thoughts of why is this man here, and what is it that she has and he's searching for? She's not registered as an official detective for that case yet, how did he know that she's the one working on it? How could he come after her?

Or that's what she thought it was.

She realized how quiet the atmosphere has gotten to be. She peeked her head over the marble counter, stood off her squat slowly. “It's okay... It's over.” The Devil was the last man standing, he assured her with a warm tone, trying to regulate his breath. His gloved fingers shake, and his eyes water beneath the dark fabric.

“You're okay?” she gently asked, the blood on his face glistened in the dim lights. He sighed, thanking God for not testing his limits tonight. He would've killed that man if she got hurt tonight.

“Yeah, don't bother. You just call the cops in.” he demanded, turning his back to her and taking whatever the man was carrying.

“But what are you gonna do with him?” she turned around the counter, arms crossed upon her chest, supporting her towel around her torso.

“I'll take care of him.” he answered, carrying the guy over his shoulder like a camping blanket, “secure your windows better next time.” He left through the window and down the fire escape. She stood still at her place, processing the latter events. She snapped back to reality and walked to her bedroom, got dressed, and immediately called the cops.

Somewhere along the Hudson River shore side of Hell's Kitchen, and in an old, abandoned warehouse at the port, one of the light sources flickered as The Devil of Hell's Kitchen brought the so-called McCarthy in, still unconscious from the beating he took.

The Devil of Hell's Kitchen placed him on a wooden chair and waited for him to regain consciousness, one hand cuffed to a pipe.

McCarthy slowly came back to his senses. With still dim and blurry vision, he turns to look at his cuffed hand and tests it, pulling his fist towards himself. It's locked. There's no escape anytime soon. He looks upwards the light source in the room, only making out something of a shadowy black figure looming from above him.

“Who the hell are you?” he speaks in a fearless deep voice.

“I'm the one asking questions.” The Devil throws a handful of folders on the wooden surface causing a loud and heavy thud. He settles down on a chair on the opposite side of the table. McCarthy recognizes these folders; they were the ones he dropped on his way out of Mr. Lloyd's house.

“I know what happened.” The Devil interrupts the silence as McCarthy stared at the folders stacked under his eyes. “I can help you find whoever is responsible for their deaths and put them behind bars.” The Devil offers.

McCarthy stayed silent for a bit before raising his head with a smirk on his face, “go to hell, kid.” his tone remained sarcastic.

“Well, I might not know exactly what you went through, but I know a friend who did, and I know how hard it is.” The Devil leans forward in his seat.

“You think I'm stupid enough to fall for this sweet talk, kid?” McCarthy shrugs, his voice laced with sarcasm.

The Devil shifts in his seat a little, placing his forearms over the wooden surface. “What do you have to lose anyway, sergeant Nicholas McCarthy?”

He looks up at him. “You think some kid in black pajamas that knows who I am is gonna scare me away? Stop me from taking them down for good?” The Devil chuckles.

“I'm just trying to help you, you're the one serving a couple sentences in jail anyway,” The Devil follows calmly with an even calmer smile, “and for the record, they are a lot, in case you want to know.” McCarthy rolls his eyes and turns his face away. “I have all night long, and I'm not going anywhere,” The Devil leans in closer, his tone turns darker, “and they're already looking for you.”

Meanwhile, sirens were heard racing across the streets, back at the heart of Hell's Kitchen, as Mahoney's team arrived at the scene. He made it straight to Madilyn's apartment where she waited for him at the door, her cat held in her hand and her old Italian neighbor on her side, he embraces her lightly. “Mayfield, you’re okay?” He asks, freeing her.

“Yeah, I am… I assume,” she shrugs, hugging herself, “at least not dead...” she steps aside to allow the cops to start their work. She observes the scene for a moment, recalling the latter events. “You know, I just-- I have this gut feeling that this is the same guy we're after in Mr. Lloyd's case,” Madilyn says, and Brett pulls a face, a little puzzled. “The exact same physical description, same ways of menace, even the way he holds a gun and his choice of words, it's all just so symmetrical that he can't be another person,” she explained thoroughly, “I can't shake that feeling off me, you know me, Brett.”

Brett sighs. “You didn't know what he was here for, did you?”

She shakes her head in complete denial. “I’m telling you. At first, I thought he was here because I'm working on his case, though I was supposed to be officially registered in the morning, and it's impossible that he knew I was applying for this case— it was just assigned to me this morning. Rethinking it now, he could've just threatened me and told me to stop coming after him— but he didn't, he told me he wasn't here for me anyway.”

Brett nods slowly, “and Daredevil?” he asks, he knows that the masked vigilante would never let that slide.

She shrugged, curled her lip. “He took him away, I don't know where— but I assume he's searching him up,” she huffed.

Brett sighs and pats her back. “I'm glad you're okay, Mayfield, and that you’re back.”

“First day on the comeback—” She chuckled, “I suppose we're used to this kinda shit. Thanks, though. I missed this.”

“You think I really care about the sentence? I don't care if they behead me or burn me alive,” McCarthy chuckled.

“I appreciate your high spirits, sergeant, but— unfortunately you won't be able to take one step if you're arrested. As I told you before— they're already looking for you.” The Devil keeps his calm but sarcastic tone. “I help you avenge your friends; you help me put the ones responsible behind bars, we'll be even,” The Devil offered.

“These people deserve to be dead.” McCarthy corrects him.

“Well, death is not always the best option. But rotting in prison is a better one,” The Devil shrugs, “these people don't deserve death, death is merciful.” The Devil stressed.

Silence falls over the atmosphere before a question breaks through the air. “Why should I trust you?” McCarthy asks.

The Devil smirks and leans forward in his seat. “Because I got something you really need.”

The Devil places a file on the tabletop, slides it towards the man on the other side of the table. “This is what you broke into Detective Mayfield's house for—but you were never gonna find there.”

With his free hand, McCarthy reached out to the file cover, eyes going back and forth between the file and what he could make out of The Devil’s face as he unfolded it. Walking his eyes across the page, McCarthy skimmed snippets of some corporations from the paper. “What is this?” he asks.

The Devil smirks, “these are some of the corporations linked to a guy I think you might want to know more about.”

“What does this have to do with it?” McCarthy asked.

The Devil shifts in his seat, “meet Mr. Winston Bennett, one of the funding pillars of the war. He's involved in corruption cases, money laundering, and bribing military officials, for instance. A year ago, he transferred a couple of his main companies’ assets, one of which was to Porter Lewis, his former secretary, he's our key to get to Bennett.”

McCarthy's eyes fall onto his lap, “fuck,” he muttered between his teeth. The Devil could sense the disappointment in his voice, but a man of war like him had seen so much it shouldn’t surprise him anymore.

“I'm gonna make each one of those fuckers pay...” he mumbled.

And that was an oath The Devil took upon himself.

Sounds of evidence bags crunching in the investigators' hands filled the room as they gathered bits and pieces of anything that could be a lead. Flashing lights flickered around the room. Madilyn sat at the dining table and watched as the team took pictures of the scene. A light switched on in her head. “McCarthy...” Madilyn says, “his name is McCarthy.”

Brett turned to look at her, a little puzzle, “McCarthy?” he asked, to confirm.

She nodded, “Daredevil said a name. This name, McCarthy,” she shifts in her seat a little, now completely facing Brett, “now I don't think that's a guess because Daredevil talked as if they met before, and I think they did. Daredevil definitely knows who that guy is.”

“Tech units, file a 6'2" white male dressed in all black with experience in military combat, he goes by the name McCarthy. All operating units, if spotted the suspect with previously mentioned description, arrest immediately.”

“Seriously, Mahoney?!” she exclaimed, angrily standing off of her seat at Brett Mahoney's office, “what do you mean I can't investigate this?—it's my job! You can't force me to stay out of it!” she followed up, almost stuttering for how outlandish this situation sounded to her.

“Mayfield,” Brett responds, pinching the bridge of his nose, too bothered to keep it together anymore, “for the last goddamn time, you can't investigate a case you're involved in and you're fully aware of this. Your testimony may not be valid and even if it is, his attorneys will make sure to use it against you just like what they did with Davis!” he shouted back as he turned to look at her, after trying to keep calm for the last thirty minutes. She remembers this trial very well; it was the downfall of her colleague years ago.

She huffed, sitting back on the chair, “well, I never said I was gonna testify against him in court...” she mumbled, crossing her arms.

“Now you're just being childish, Mayfield! If I don't stop you, the court will! And they might as well take back your license, so don't go reckless, I already have plenty of idiots up to my ears!”

“Brett, please,” she pleaded, her eyes blurred with the tears she fought to keep, “this is my chance to come back. You didn't just call me out of my shift to stop me from doing it—” her voice cracked, “you know I've always wanted to come back.”

“And you know you've already been causing trouble all around while working with the Bulletin. And you also know that you were always a second away from arrest for obstruction of justice—multiple times!”

“Well, that means I'm smart and I can get away with it—”

“That means you never pull your head out of your ass and see that you're a bull in a China shop!”

“For the love of God—”

“I'm not gonna say this again, Mayfield. If I ever find out you got involved in the matter, I'm gonna be the one to arrest you, and that's my final word.” he towered over her as he leant over his desk.

“Fine!” She stood off her seat and walked towards the door.

“I don't wanna hear you talking about this case again, Mayfield!” Brett said before she slammed the door behind her. Turning around with a sigh, she saw her three colleagues standing in the narrow hallway right in front of the door, they're concerned, deeply.

“So?” Foggy started.

“I can't investigate the case,” she shook her head, “but you guys can still take his case! Not Mr. Lloyd's. His.”

“Why take his case? He tried to kill you last night!” Matt countered, scrunching his face.

“He threatened to, he didn't want to kill me, I was never his target and I already told you that!” Madilyn countered back.

Matt sighs, running his hand across his face. “You can't risk it,” he calmly says, “what if he comes after you again?” Matt doesn't want her to get caught up in the mess. She's not made for such things. The things he knows about the case might crush her.

Madilyn shook her head, “he won't, I'm not even his target, trust me,” she stopped. “Look, you just--... you're gonna investigate him, just in case, because I don't think that's a normal case, and I think it's going to have a great impact on the firm. I have this gut feeling and it never disappointed me.”

Her eyes darted back and forth between the three of them. “Karen, say something?” She knows Karen will always have her back.

Karen nodded, “I say we give it a shot?” she stated, looking at both Matt and Foggy next to her. Madilyn sighed with a smile. “I mean she's right, there's nothing we could lose.”

Matt clenched his jaw, “you don't have to support her just because she's your friend.” Matt was worried, and he couldn't hide it anymore.

“But Matt,” Karen countered, “she's right, there's something off about this case, and I trust her guts.” she explained, tucking her blonde strands behind her ear, “a guy she never knew broke into her house, saying she had nothing to do with what he’s doing, yet proceeds to break into her house and takes something she never knew it existed in her home. Something is off.”

“Foggy?” Madilyn called, asking for his opinion as he stood silently watching the conversation going back and forth.

“Well,” Foggy slowly shrugged, “I can't say I wasn't intrigued by what they're saying...”

Matt rolled his eyes behind his tinted glasses, “I can't believe you're agreeing with them on this, it's dangerous.”

Foggy glanced at him with a knowing look, “it's not our first time involved with such things, buddy.”

They all stared at Matt, waiting for his final answer. He huffed, unclenching his jaw, “we're gonna do it, but...”

“But what?” Madilyn whined, almost comically.

“But none of you put yourselves in trouble. That means no going on investigation night shifts, no playing undercover cop and surely, no participating in dangerous political positions or situations.” he pointed a finger at each one of them. “And because I don't have experience on such acts from you yet, please don't do any of these, it's dangerous and ridiculous and I don't want a third troublemaker on the team.” he directed his speech to Madilyn. It was really funny coming out of his mouth; it was like he was talking to himself. Foggy stared at his feet to distract himself from laughing at what Matt said.

Matt tilts his head, waiting for her answer. She huffed, rolling her honey eyes, “fine.” They all suspire.

“Let's go pick up some coffee and see what we've got for starters, shall we?” Foggy suggested. The girls agreed by taking the lead on the way out. “A fourth you meant,” Foggy corrected in a whisper as he let Matt hold his arm. Matt chuckled. “You should really take your own advice sometimes, buddy. Let's go.”

“I'll meet you downstairs tomorrow, alright?” she asked him, standing at her building entrance, tugging on her purse strap.

“Alright,” he smiled. “Goodnight, Madilyn, take care of yourself,” he fixed the red blinds barely hanging on the bridge of his nose.

“You too.” she smiled back, “Goodnight, Matt.” She said, before turning around and walking towards the stairs.

She took the stairs to her apartment. As she unlocked her door, her cat purred and scratched the wooden surface, eager to reunite with her. “Hello, little one!” she carried her in her arms the moment she walked into her apartment, “did you miss mommy? Oh, did you miss mommy? Mommy missed you too, baby!” she playfully nuzzled her cat's head. Ivy trilled. “Well, I'm hungry too, I'm gonna make us something.” she headed to the kitchen as she cradled her cat. Searching in the pantry, she found a can of soft food. She emptied the can in a bowl and walked across the room to place it at her cat's area.

Once she made sure her cat was indulged in feeding, she headed to her room to change her clothes. In all black outfit and a zip-up hoodie, she sat on the edge of her bed with her phone in her hand, waiting for her call to be answered.

“Madilyn?...”

“Hey, dad. How's it going?” she fiddled with the drawstring of her hoodie.

“I'm doing great, angel... Your mom told me you got that job at the... Nicholson and Madock, I guess?...”

“It's Nelson and Murdock, and Page,” she corrected, “it's a law firm, and recently they got into private investigation,” she recalls the latter events, “so I applied for the job, and I got accepted. Mom probably told you all of that.”

“Oh, yeah, these fellas… I heard they had a questionable reputation...” she huffed a chuckle at his comment.

“Yeah, they did get involved in a couple of things lately, but I assure you, they're squeaky clean.” Her father chuckled at her response. It's been almost six months since she last heard his laughter echoing on the walls of her place. “However, that's not why I called.” her chuckles subsided, she had to be straightforward.

“What is it then, angel?” her father asked, he's probably flipping through one of his newspapers, she knows the way he speaks when he's wrapped up in reading.

“There's a guy I met last night, he said his name was McCarthy and that he knows you very well and wanted to make sure if you're okay,” she stared out of her window as the dim moonlight casted upon the floor of her room. Her father went silent for a moment. She mentally made a note of that. He definitely knows him; he was an admiral; he knows all the people he worked with.

“I don't think I recall this name...” he slowly answered, “no... I don't think I know a guy with this name...”

“Yeah, I thought so…” she clenched her jaw, already calculated her next move.

“Alright, angel... Gotta go now... Your mom is struggling with the blender again...” he chuckled.

“Alright, dad. Tell her I said hi. Talk to you later,” she said and hung up, grabbing her boots off the floor to wear them.

Another rainy night, she walks over the forming water puddles, splashing her heavy feet into the spills. Her journey doesn't take long, her destination is only a twenty-minutes-away walk. She took the elevator of a building and rang a bell.

Once. Twice. Three times.

“Who is it?” a guy calls from inside, his voice approaching the other side of the door.

“It's me, Alan. Madilyn.” she answers, “I'm freezing here.”

“Alright, alright, I'm coming...” she heard a noise before he reached the door, “shit...” he cussed under his breath. He opens the door. “Hey, Maddie-- whoa, no hugs,” he raised his hands, “you're soaked, and I might catch a cold.”

“Yeah, you could've answered earlier...” she responded, passing him and into the house, “why is this place so messy?” she grimaced, taking her hoodie off.

“Had a really shitty week at work,” he rubbed his face, his eyes are surrounded with dark circles, “there's a money-laundering scandal going around and it's affecting everyone.”

“Money-laundering? How's that?” she asked, squeezing the water out of her hair.

“The head of the company is suspected to have been laundering money through one of his oil companies,” Alan explained. She hummed. “We still don't know much details about the case, they're keeping it under wraps. It doesn't matter really. What brought you here in this weather, though?”

“Oh, ummm... A guy broke into my house last night,” she started, “and I'm suspecting he's from the military.”

“How can you be so chill about it?” his brows knitted with confusion, “you're talking like you got a gift card from Walmart or something...”

“It was already dealt with,” she shrugged, “not by the cops of course.” she mumbled the latter part.

“Who dealt with it then?”

“Daredevil.”

“There are guards on this floor,” The Devil whispered, hiding behind one of the pillars at the parking lot, next to him was McCarthy, who was visibly confused. “Four.” The Devil confirmed.

“There's two more, they're taking the elevator with him,” he tilted his head to the side a little, “and there's a driver, he's in the car. It's a few minutes away from the elevator, that’s enough time for us.”

“How do you know all of that?” The Devil smirked at McCarthy’s question before rolling to hide behind a car. The man is out of the elevator. He's moving closer with his guards. But The Devil must clear his way first. His dark silhouette moves from one pillar to another. He throws one of his wooden batons at a guard. He's down, and luckily, no one noticed, not yet.

He smells sulfur, McCarthy has taken his gun out of its holster. The Devil shoots his other baton, but it aims for McCarthy's hand, throwing the gun out of his grip, sending it clattering across the floor. “No guns,” he whispers.

“Come on...” McCarthy rolls his eyes.

“There’s noise on the floor, 10 o’clock…” one of the bodyguards talks through the handheld transceiver as he walks towards the source of the latter sounds. The Devil takes advantage of the situation, silently attacking the man from behind, sending him into a short sleep. Meanwhile, McCarthy has taken another one down with the back of his gun. The last one was an easy target, The Devil smacked him with a baton, knocking him unconscious. As he drags the man away, he hears a click behind his back.

BANG!

He dodges the bullet and turns, knocking the gun out of the bodyguard’s hand and blowing him with a punch in his chin. The man falters in his steps but manages to aim a punch in The Devil’s face, The Devil strikes him before he could react further, knocking him to the ground, as McCarthy attacks the other bodyguard with a blow to his head.

The man freezes for a moment before bolting towards his car, but to no avail, The Devil corners him against the car before he could reach the rear door’s handle as his driver escapes the scene.

“You’re not gonna hurt me,” arrogantly, he speaks, “I’m too influential, I can destroy you—” but before he could finish his sentence, he was blown with a fist to the face, McCarthy’s fist, sending his rectangular glasses shattering across the concrete flooring.

“Not as influential as you may think,” McCarthy comments.

“Don’t you know who I am?!” he shouts. They did not flinch.

“We’re not the kind of guys who’d bully a random rich business man,” The Devil smugly smiles and answers after swallowing his desire to punch him in the face, “but I appreciate the effort you put on a show.”

“We believe you have some information that we need…” The Devil starts.

“Winston Bennett,” McCarthy cuts him off offensively, “does that ring any bells for you, prick?” The Devil sighs, rolls his eyes behind his mask.

“You were his secretary, more like his right-hand man,” The Devil continues.

“Then why are you coming after me, bastards? Why not go after him?”

“Where does he keep his files?” The Devil ignores his rude response, still holding him by the collar of his swanky gray dress suit.

“Why the hell would I tell you—” The Devil slams him against the car, his head hits the metallic body.

“Answer the question.” His voice is coarse and dull, “where does Winston Bennett keeps his files?” McCarthy pulls his gun out of its holster and points it Lewis’ head, the muzzle is almost carving a circle in his skull. The Devil tightens his grip on Lewis’ necktie. His neck turns red and swollen with the obstructed air and blood.

“A safe…” he groans.

“Where the fuck is that safe?!” McCarthy snaps, imprinting his gun further into Lewis’ head.

“Diesel…” he chokes, “Diesel Gush… the executive office… a painting…” he coughs and wheezes, “please…” he pants as he pleads. The Devil lets go of his collar enough to breathe before aiming a punch straight to his nose, knocking Lewis down with a bloody nose on the gray concrete floor. As he tries to regain composure, he looks up, but no one is there anymore.

“Did you find anything?” Madilyn sleepily asked, resting her head on the couch arm and her eyes are half opened.

“There are hundreds of thousands of people in the navy under the name McCarthy,” Alan answered, still staring at his screen, “of course I'm not gonna find him, I'm not a digital magician.” Madilyn stood off the couch. “Wait, where are you going?” he asked, turning to look at her walking to the door.

“Calling it a night,” she answered, putting on her boots, “call me if you find anything, alright?”

“You're sure you could go home like that?” he took his headphones off, resting it on his neck, “you can stay the night here if you want to.”

“Nah, I'm good.” she shook her head, already opened the front door, “I can walk home... Or take a cab... Or whatever...” she mumbled, “I'll text you if I find any new info on him, alright? Alright.” she says, closing the door right after.

She walked down the stairs and out of the building. The rain stopped, that was one good thing, at least she wouldn't have to fight both the water and sleep.

“You know you can't walk home looking like that, detective.” a familiar voice says, before coming out of the dark and revealing himself.

She gasped, pulling her gun out, aiming it at the shadow man. “Jesus!” she clutched her chest, “I almost shot you!”

The Devil grinned as he approached her, “it's too late to walk home alone,” she lowers the gun, “and you're a detective, you should be on alert. Not sleepy.”

“I was sleepy until you showed up and scared the shit outta me,” she mumbled. He barks laughing. “You enjoyed it that much?” she asked, she couldn't hide the smile on her face.

He shook his head in denial, “I never meant to do that…” he chuckled, his gravelly voice is amusing, “I wanted to be gentler.”

She looks down, biting back the smile on her lip; his figure is already distracting more than the sleepy bees buzzing in her head. “So, I guess you're here to walk me home, Mr. Devil. Right?”

He shrugged with a smirk, “you can say that.” she nodded to his response.

“Guess I don't need to show you the way,” she says, “unless you insist,” he chuckled. She made The Devil laugh three times, in contrast to the bluntness he was known for, he sounds gentler. His laughter sounded pretty amusing, too. It’s not like she’d feel the butterflies crowding her stomach whenever she hears it, or is it?

As they started to walk, the sky steadily dimmed, the moonlight softly hid behind the clouds, and the rain droplets bounced off their shoulders once again. She hugged herself tight to keep her body heat, yet the goosebumps rose on her forearms beneath her dark soaked hoodie. She looks at his toned muscles peeking from beneath the wet and stretchy fabric, she’s glad he couldn’t see the red flush on her face, she hoped.

“How did you know I was there?” she broke the quiet pitter-patters of the rain, “I mean…” she trailed off for a moment, shrugging and looking down at her boots as they gently broke the surfaces of the puddles.

“I was overlooking the area when I found you walking out of the building…” he wasn’t lying though, he knew she wasn’t home so he had to watch over her.

“That makes sense…” she shrugged.

The rain continues to softly drop, showering the streets of Hell’s Kitchen. It's warm, it’s calm, it’s safe. She glances at her side, he’s quietly walking, quieter than the rain. The pitter-patters fade into the background, her heart steadily beats in her chest. The anxiety enzyme in her blood is lower than the night before, almost no longer exists. She suspires, calmly, she feels alright. It warms his heart.

“So…” she speaks again, breaking the silence for the second time, “about last night…” he huffs with a smile, “what did you do to him?”

“Well, we’ve come to an agreement…”

“What was he doing in my house? Then he said it doesn’t have anything to do with me?” she speaks her thoughts, “doesn’t make sense to me…”

“That, um…” he sighs, he knows why McCarthy was there, he just couldn’t tell her. “Couldn’t really get it out of him…”

“Yikes…” she muttered, “but thanks anyway, if it wasn’t for you I would’ve been dead… I guess.” He smiles.

“Guess you’re home now.” The Devil speaks.

“I’ll see you around?” She looks at her building’s entrance and then back at him, but he was gone, like he was never there. “Oh…” She sighs and walks into the building, closing the door behind her and taking the stairs afterwards. She unlocks her apartment door and places the keys on the console table.

Kicking off her wet and muddy boots, she takes off her dampened zip-up hoodie and t-shirt, and walks in the direction of the kitchen. She opens the fridge, retrieving a cold bottle of water.

“You keep forgetting to close your windows, detective,” she heard a voice from behind her. She gasped and turned, she finds The Devil standing at her window with a grin. It was so hard for her not to smile back, or, at the very least, not fall for it. She raked her fingers through her dampened hair, biting her lip to hide her grin. “Goodnight, detective.” he says with a smile.

“Goodnight, Devil.”

Knock. Knock. Knock.

He walks to his door as he buttons up his white dress shirt. It's her. She's pulling onto the strap of her purse. She wore a dress today; it's softly brushing again her skin. Her hair is tied in a low bun, and it's a little messy; her dark bangs are straying out of it. But her fragrance was as lovely as always, floral, and sweet like vanilla. His heart smiled behind his ribcage as he prepared himself to open the door.

“Good morning, Matt-- whoa, God! Are you okay?” she exclaimed, her smile disappeared, and her eyes are gone wide, “what's that big bruise next to your eye?” she's hesitant to check it.

“Slipped in the shower last night...” he says, smiling apologetically, “good morning, Madilyn.” He opens the door for her to come in. She walks down the hallway and stands by the end of it. “Please take a seat,” he says as he walks to the kitchen. She sat on his couch as he started the coffeemaker up.

“I called you, but you didn't answer, so... I thought I should check on you,” she said, placing her purse next to her on the leather couch.

“Sorry, It's my fault... I probably left it on silent.” she nodded to his answer.

“Did you apply any ice to it-- I mean the bruise?” she asked, staring at his muscles moving beneath the white dress shirt as he prepared the coffee. He was impressive, she didn't have to think about it twice.

“Not sure if I did..” he answered, too carried away in his search for an extra mug in his cupboard, “I can do it later at the office.” He found one and placed it next to his.

Her eyes darted around the room, “this looks cozy, the place,” she stated, “did anyone help you with the decor? I mean—”

Matt chuckled; her question warmed his heart. He shook his head, “no, I was told it was like this when I first rented it.” she nodded and hummed to his answer. Her eyes fell to the coffee table, it was neatly arranged, his mail was sorted, his phone was aligned with his folded cane and briefcase. It was a pleasing scenery to see.

“Creamer or no creamer?” he asked, her head flies to look his way, he's turning her way with a warm smile.

She knows he couldn't see it, but she smiles back, “creamer,” she says, “two spoons of sugar.” He nods and continues his work.

She picks up his folded cane to inspect it, she's never seen one this close, and it looked interesting. She doesn't notice him placing the mug on the table in front of her. He cleared his throat, “your coffee,” he says as he straightens his back and heads to his room.

“Thanks,” she says, taking the mug off the table and drawing it to her mouth to take a sip. It's sweet, with a hint of vanilla. She hummed contentedly as the dulcet taste swirled in her mouth.

She stood off her seat and walked to the window, the foggy but slightly different in color tiles were beaming with light. She leant onto it, looking outside to make out a mirage of the neighborhood. She could see the windows of her own apartment on the other side of the the street, her cat was standing by the living room window, biting the green leaves off the branches of the plant she left on the windowsill—but Ivy couldn't see her.

In the other room, the heat was rising up his neck, he was nervous, his hands were shaking. The sound of her heels softly clicking on the wooden floor makes his heart tick faster with each step she takes. She takes a sip of her coffee, her heart beats faster and she's smiling. He's jittering with each breath she takes, she's looking outside the window and tucking her stray bangs behind her ear, her earring swings to the movement of her hand, and his heart sways with it.

He regrets not answering the phone, he wouldn't have to shake like a broken blender despite her standing in a completely different room—yet he couldn't leave her waiting downstairs.

He couldn't tie his necktie, no matter how hard he tried, his hands kept trembling and his mind kept straying. “Damn it...” he cursed under his breath, but it was loud enough for her to hear it.

“Are you okay, Matt?” she asked, still giving him privacy. He walked out of his room, necktie in his hand and his face is flustered.

“Couldn't tie it,” he sighed. She approaches, his heart is burning, and the blood is pumping wild in his ears.

“Can I help you with it?” she asks, her fingertips are softly touching his. He nods. She feels his hands shaking beneath her touch. “Are you alright?” she asks with a smile, her voice is warm with worry, “you're shaking...”

He knows, oh Hell—he knows. “I... I don't-- I don't know...” he blurts, “maybe I'm just... Tired... Yeah.”

She takes the black tie and starts wrapping it around her arm. “Learned this trick a while ago,” she says, “you spread the thick part along your arm and wrap the thin part three times around your wrist,” she explains, “then you pull the second loop through the first loop... And we're done. You're just gonna have to put it on.”

She smiled proudly at herself. “I'm just gonna adjust it a bit...” she fixes the length of each end and widens the loop. “Can I help you put it on-- unless you want to--do it yourself—”

He shook his head, “of course—you can... Thank you.” he smiles with his red face as she passes his head through the noose.

“You're welcome,” she responded with a grin, fixing his collar around the noose before fitting it around his neck. “It looks good,” she addressed, smiling, “not because I tied it, of course…” she mutters, he giggles. The sunlight beamed upon his smiling face so gently, the tint of the glass softly shaded his skin with colorful auras. “Is there anything else that I can help you with?” she offered.

He shook his head, “thank you,” he gestured a thumb to his bedroom, “I'm just gonna get my suit jacket.” She nodded and hummed, watched him make his way back to his room and put on his suit jacket. He walks back into the living room and picks up his briefcase, phone, keys and cane— off the table. And without saying another word, they leave the apartment, hands tangled, hearts tied.

[previous / next]

[scyllas-revenge]

I'm so depressed rn about dating/marriage/the future, literally cried yesterday, I just don't think its going to happen. I'm not going to ask a guy out because I don't have the confidence for that and if he said yes it would always be in the back of my head that he's just settling for me cuz if he wanted me he'd have asked. I've never even been on a date, ever! Didn't even go to my own senior prom cuz I didn't wanna have to sit alone all night lol

Recently I was texting a guy and he was so sweet and gentlemanly but I totally ruined that. He came into my work to use our services and I freaked out and started telling my colleague that I wish he wouldn't come here and like why is he here and stressing about him being there. And I'm pretty sure he overheard and doesn't understand that I didn't actually mean any of that I just have an anxiety disorder and freaked out. Then my colleague started laughing about an older man who asked me out (he was 65 wth!) And I think other actually nice guy thinks we were laughing about him.

Now at work his entire demeanor has changed he seems so down and he legit glares at me when saying goodbye on the way out (my desk is by the door) So being at work is depressing because all I can think about at work is how this man was actually so sweet and so nice to me and I with my big mouth and idiot anxiety just disrespected him so much and clearly hurt his feelings which he didn't deserve. And I don't wanna try to talk to him about it because we don't really know each other that well and what am I supposed to say 'hey did you hear me talking about you and about how I want you to go away-yeah I didn't mean that it was just anxiety pls don't be upset-like wth I can't do that

Now I'm gonna pray every morning for God to keep my words so I don't be so damn stupid. I'm just really upset that I upset someone like that regardless of possible dating I don't even care I just care that I was inadvertently so mean like what kind of bullshit high school level behaviour was that ffs

Btw this is the anon from sotwk-I saw your comment and totally relate like its nice to know I'm not alone and others deal with this too but at the same time it's depressing as hell that this many people are having this problem, like it just reinforces the hopelessness. I feel like I'm sitting in a waiting room waiting for something that will never happen but I cant get out of the waiting room because I really want the thing y'know?

Apologies for the entire ass rant, I'm just so mad at myself rn

Hey anon! I'm really sorry you're going through all this. Giving advice isn't my strong suit, but I definitely understand the "sitting in a waiting room" feeling, and it sucks.

I spent a good chunk of my 20s like that, feeling stuck and alone and unable to stop crying or shake off my self-loathing. I was trapped waiting for things that would never happen and I was powerless to change that.

No, things aren't perfect now, and yes, I'm still very single, but the good news is I did manage to escape the "waiting room" feeling. It still creeps up every now and again, but I'm better able to recognize and fight it.

The first step was realizing I was depressed. Oh my GOD was I depressed. It feels ridiculous that I didn't notice at the time, but it had been creeping up on me so slowly that at some point it just became my new normal to cry multiple times a week. I was lethargic and detached and utterly convinced to the very core of my being that something was fundamentally wrong with me, and that I would never be loved and my whole life would pass me by with that same horrible sense of waiting. (I don't want to sit here giving armchair diagnoses or pretending to know all the details of your life, but it certainly looks to me like you have depression too.)

When I turned 30 it felt like a wake-up call- it's a new decade and something needs to change. The thought of my 30s slipping by just like a good chunk of my 20s really scared me.

So the second step for me was therapy. I don't know if you're in therapy now, or tried it and it didn't work, or if it's an option for you financially, but if you can give it a try, I really do think it will help. I can tell you're desperate to get all this off your chest and get answers and validation, and a good therapist will help with that way more than a tumblr ask box will! My therapist also connected me with a psychiatrist, because wow does medicine also help. It took some trial and error, but between the right meds and the right people to talk to, things really did improve.

It's hard, but I'm doing my best to try new things- new hobbies, social groups, clubs, anything- because I want to meet new people and have more meaning in my life. The disgusting cocktail of depression, anxiety, and executive dysfunction were keeping me from doing much of anything besides work and scrolling the internet, and that really intensified the feeling of being stuck in a waiting room, watching other people's lives move forward while i was sitting still. But being more active socially, trying new hobbies, even just being outside of my apartment more often, is giving me back some control. I even took an impromptu trip to Iceland, alone, and I could practically hear myself slamming the door of the waiting room behind me as I left!

I know none of the above rambling had anything to do with finding love, but personally, I kind of needed to take all of those steps before I could focus on anything else. And it wasn't that I "needed to stop looking for love and focus on other things, and love will come when you least expect it" - it was that if I didn't try to bring more meaning into my life, my depression was never going to get better.

And it wasn't that I "needed to love myself first or no one will ever love me" - it was that I had been spiraling for years and could hardly function if I didn't focus on my mental health. (So...maybe all that cliche advice isn't wrong. It's just usually not framed right.)

Because that's the thing- you're not unlovable or doomed to be alone or secretly fundamentally flawed or anything else your brain is telling you right now. What you are is a good person worthy of love and respect whose anxiety and depression are doing their best to get the better of her. They're in that waiting room with you, barring the door shut and telling you it's your fault, and you need to use any tools you can (therapy, medicine, guidance counseling, meditation, anything) to shut them up and kick the door down. Love isn't in that waiting room- it never was. It's beyond the door, in the real world, where you have agency and aren't powerless to change things.

Beyond dragging a waiting room metaphor way too far, I don't have much more advice, especially as far as romance goes. My own love life is nonexistent- I'm probably not the best person to get help from!

It sounds like you might be feeling too much anxiety to try dating apps, or you might not like the idea of them. And tbh I hate them too, but I bring them up because that was how I got my first real date at 24, as well as 99% of the other dates I've been on since. Even if the date sucks, it makes dating as a concept feel a bit less daunting- it's no longer this Big Significant Achievement, it's just a thing you've done before.

Anyway, I'm not sure if any of this very long response will help or not, but feel free to send me a message if you want to talk more. I'm wishing you all the best and am confident that things will get better!

[lqfiles]

ok i just realized i NEVER sent the reply to your last reply to my ask……….. god i feel so bad ☹️☹️

im looking forward to this haechan smau!!!! i could really use your humor these days cause i’ve been having some problems w a crush and i always end up giggling when u post 🙁

also wth 😭😭 that sounds awful, staining your skirt is one of the worst things ever although i tend to stain chairs at school more than skirts which is… maybe just as embarrassing. hopefully that nap helped!!! and hopefully you’ve been having better days than that one ❤️❤️❤️❤️ u deserve to enjoy a good day w lots of laughs and happiness :))

i really wanna know how has life been treating you since that last reply, school, friends etc only if you’re comfortable ofc its just out of mere curiosity i just love hearing from you??? it’s 8:36pm here and i’ll go to sleep in a few hours, hope you have great sleep too!! and also an amazing weekend <3 LOVEYOUUU take careee

- 🐣 anon

well i feel even worse for not answering this sooner so please forgive me for the late answer 💔

im sorry to hear that :(( ill try to post the smau sooner, im still trying to write the plot down and finalise everything so its not messy and all over the place but im happy to know that i make you giggle, you can always reread stg in the meantime <3

LOLLL seems like we’re both very clumsy 😭😭😭 i’d say we’re both embarrassing in different ways lolll but yes the nap helped they always do, these days have been alright, i have spring holidays which is why im able to respond to this ask!! you’re so cute i wish you nothing but happiness too anon, im sure life will be better for you i’ll pray for it :)))

i’ve honestly been trying to focus on college and doing my work, been tired a lot but the naps help, had a parents evening recently and it went well :D im also becoming closer with my friend’s friends which is good, they seem to like me and keep calling me funny which is a good sign :) even hung out with one during break alone this week and it was surprisingly not too awkward, other than that im just trying to enjoy everything in life, what about you???

im assuming its night time there again so if you’re going to bed i hope you have a great sleep and weekend ^^ I LOVE YOU MORE!

[pocketaltar]

would LOVE to hear your thoughts on supernatural + hinduism 👀👀

i got 2?? whole asks asking me to talk about this?? i’ve been training my whole life for this exact moment

ok so: im hindu, my whole family is hindu, i’ve been studying and learning about hinduism for my whole life. if you want me to elaborate on any of the myths, gods, monsters, etc. that i mentioned pls pls pls let me know, i love talking about this stuff and i never get the chance. 

also this got suuuuuper long so: 

spn only brings up three things that have to do with hinduism (i think. pls tell me if there’s more, i stopped watching at s11). both kali ma and lord ganesha are in s5 e19 hammer of the gods, and the brothers hunt a vetala in s7 e11 adventures in babysitting.

first, kali ma or kalika devi. this is, hands down, their biggest fuck up. kali ma (i call her kali ma, kali devi, or kalika devi as a sign of respect, but the episode just refers to her as kali) has the largest part and most lines out of any of the gods in 5x19. 

and their portrayal of her uh. kinda sucks. for refernce, kalika devi was created in order to a kill a demon who’s power was that anytime a drop of his blood touched the ground, a clone of himself would appear. basically - impossible to kill. you wanna know how she killed him? kalika devi drank his blood and ate his body so that he couldn’t clone himself anymore.

she’s also known as the protector, the mother, and the destroyer. kali ma is who the gods turn to when something goes wrong for them. it’s gross and disrespectful that a washed up former angel can kill her without batting an eye, because in reality, she is far more powerful and far more terrifying than lucifer. 

side note: i really liked the way she looked in the show! the actress was great and i appreciate them getting a darker desi actress, because kali ma canonically has dark skin. the jewelry was cool, although in myth kali ma is depicated as an emaciated woman wearing animal furs and skulls, with bloodshot eyes and her tongue hanging out. basically, i think they could’ve made her scarier, but it’s supernatural and all women must be fuckable.

lord ganesh or ganesha (some people say ganesh, i grew up wth ganesha) is the other hindu god in 5x11. there’s not much i can say because he’s in the episode for like. 5 seconds but the parts he is in are uh. not great. he’s introduced through a clip of dean walking past an open door and seeing an elephant, then doing a double take and seeing ganesha, who’s portrayed as a large black man.

the idea of ganesha just being an elephant is really, really weird. he was brought to life by the goddess parvati, and had his head cut off and replaced with an elephant’s head. so there’s no reason he’d ever be an elephant?? he’s not an animal?? did they google him?? also, lord ganesha is 1000% vegetarian, to the point where a large part of the holiday dedicated to him is gathering plants for him to eat. it’s so gross to even insinuate that he might eat meat, especially human.

the same issue with kali ma applies here too. lord ganesha is the god of removing obstacles and making goals easier. he’s who you pray to before any ceremony or hardship. the idea that lucifer could take him out like that is disgusting and colonialist.

also, a quick note on his appearance: lord ganesha is portrayed by keith dallas, who’s a black american. i’m glad they got his size right, as ganesha is canonically fat. and black hindus do exist! especially in the caribbean and parts of africa, when indians were brought over to those places by the british. if this was a show that had a more diverse team, paid more attention to details, or cared more about accuracy, i’d assume that this was a deliberate choice to highlight the diversity of hindus. but i’m certain it was the crew going “all people of color are the same, they won’t even notice.” which is fucked. 

finally, the vetalas. the vetala is a hindu ghost that is created when a body does not receive a proper funeral (because bodies in hinduism are supposed to be cremated, if the body is not properly burnt, a vetala can form). they’re confined to certain areas, usually forests, and they really aren’t harmful unless you’re intruding on or fucking with them. there are stories of kings trying to remove them but like. they are literally nothing like the spn version. what the fuck was that. just call it something else. 

[scorpiomindfuck]

Y'all, I'm behind on lone star and I just got done watching episodes 11 and 12 and WHAT. THE. FUCK.

The fucking heart attacks holy fucking crap. I've completely lost my mind. What the fuck with everything . When I tell you i screamed istg holy fucking balls wth

AND WHAT THE HELL WAS THE ENDING OF EP 12, WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED TO TOMMY'S HUSBAND

Bruh WHY WAS HIS FUCKING EYE LIKE THAT

And oh my god. That arson killing himself was fucking madness wth

I can't with the house setting on fire while they were on their way to have sex, the music was groovy tho. I wanted to cry when TK and Carlos fought because of their dads omg couldn't they warn the boys they were about to perform a damn soap opera

I am all out of order rn and my head hurts but I'm also about to start ep13 so pray for me

Also I just wanna say I'm sorry to owen because I spent the duration of this viewing shitting on that man for being a fucking idiot and he turned around to be a crazy ass mastermind who would be deadly if lost to the dark side. I'm so sorry, sir.

My man Judd, you doing good sir, i too would kill for miss grace sir, thank you

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

TEQUILA AND DAIKIRI

Johnny “Coco” Cruz x Reader

Anon asked: can you do an imagine with coco in where you two are best friends and one night you got drunk and go to his house and kiss him and you tell that you love him and he is like in shock and you thing he doesn’t love you back so you run away and you start ignoring him preventing from realreal heartbreak

Word Count: 1.3k

Thanks to my lovely beta reader @chibsytelford 💘

Author comments: I hope you all enjoy. Gif credits to: @angels-reyes

Tag list: @starrynite7114 ​ @chibsytelford ​ @dazzledamazon ​ @mara-mpou ​ @sammskellington ​ @gemini0410 ​ @1-800-imagines ​ @briana-mishell24 ​ @sassymox @whyisgmora @aquamento 💥 (if you wanna be tagged, send me a message!)

“Are you sure...?” Ez asks again whilst you're taking off the helmet with some difficulties, because you drunk too much. More than usual.

You nod very convinced, while he turns his gaze from the building where Coco lives, to you. He shrugs his shoulders, taking the helmet to hang it in the handlebar. Ez turns off the motorbike when you're inside the hall, going upstairs to the flat you know by heart. The mexican and you met like ten years ago, being in inseparable since then but some months ago you started to feel something else, something bigger, for him. You think it's happened in a Mayan party, when you found yourself laying on his lap with both arms around his neck and his wrapping your body, with some fingers traveling over a side of your left thigh so kindly that melted you, your beliefs and your whole soul.

Your knuckles hit the main door, more loudly than you could think being partially deaf because of the music that was playing in the pub. You wait for some seconds till you see some light under the door. Coco opens it, rubbing his eyes kinda sleepy without wearing a shirt. You gawk at the tattoos on his chest, until he slaps your forehead with his fingers.

“Yo! Mami, it's five am, 'foc' is wro—”.

Before you let him to finish the sentence, your lips collides with his placing both arms on his neck. The kiss it's weird and a little uncomfortable, but he tastes like tequila and that's really good. Pulling him away looking at his face you know it wasn't a good idea. He's bewildered staring at you with pursed lips as you kiss them. Raising your right forefinger, trying to say something, you decide to turn over your sneakers to run away downstairs even if he's calling you, telling you to wait for him. You don't look back, down the avenue, while your legs are burning because of the fast steps going to your house.

┅┅ ┅ ┅ ┅┅

You growl squeezing in pain with the sheets tangled in your almost naked body. The sun is on, illuminating your room in a unpleasant way. Hiding your head with the pillow, you snort heavy because of the headache hitting you thanks to the hangover. You know that what happened last night it wasn't a dream, nor a nightmare. Anyway, you confirm that fact when, after palming the bed, you find your phone. There are thirty-six missed calls and seventeen text from Coco. Turning off the wifi to avoid the double blue check, so he can't know you read them, you open the conversation.

(05:03) 💬: (Y/N) ????

(05:06) 💬: where r u ????

(05:06) 💬: pick up ma calls!

(05:11) 💬: you ok ???

(05:15) 💬: d fuc u did ???

(05:16) 💬: r u drunk mami ??

(05:19) 💬: why u kiss meee

(05:31) 💬: where r u ????????

(05:33) 💬: why don u answer

(05:33) 💬: am callin 911

(05:47) 💬: shit

(05:47) 💬: d fuc is wron wth u ??

(06:08) 💬: (Y/N) hello ?????????

(06:15) 💬: r u dead ????

(06:36) 💬: did u fockin mix tequila nd daikiri again ????

(09:43) 💬: yo u r worren me

(09:43) 💬: im comen 2 ur house u little fockin craze bech

The last message makes jump the pillow over your head to the floor. The door is almost closed and you can hear the tv on with some action movie on it. You sob because of the pain lashing your head and the shame is consuming you. Getting out of the bed, praying it's Angel who is there, you grab a shirt wearing it, sticking your head out the frame. You sob again when you find Coco staring at you, closing the door as if he didn't see you. Dragging your back down through it, you sit on the floor with your knees against your chest being surrounded by your arms.

The man pushes the door a little, but you close it again. Hearing him sighing, you shake your head.

“We have to talk”.

“Get outta' ma' house, Coco”. You blub without tears filling your eyes, just making the sound.

“That's all? You come to mine, kiss me and you're not gonna say anythen'?”

No words. You can't answer him. You're regretting what you did 'cause you thought he could feel something too. But, by the way he didn't move, nor kissed you back. The next thing you can hear is the main door being closed loud with a dry hit. You're fucked. You fucked up ten years of relationship in three seconds.

━━━━━━ ﹅ ━━━━━━

Two days passed since he left your house and you wrote Taza to ask him to change your turn at the car scrapping, so you don't have to work with Coco. And even you think that the talk it's something that will not happen, you're very, very, very wrong.

After finish your turn, when the moon is almost on top of the sky, you go out of the office downstairs seeing the mexican sitting on your bike and smoking a cigar with a no-friends-face. He's kinda angry, upset and tired of being running behind you the last days, till he finally get the perfect opportunity. You're wearing your helmet, giving him the silent treatment and checking your pocket looking for your keys.

“I got them”. He says raising his free hand, with them on his palm. “And 'am not gonna give you, if you don' talk to me”.

“There's a beautiful night with a lot of stars”. You play fool, actually talking to him as he wants.

“Why you kissed me, ah?”

“I was drunk”.

“Yea', but I know you drunk and you didn' try before”.

“For god's sake, Coco, forget it. It was just a fuckin' kiss”.

“No, it wasn't”. He says shaking his head and having a smoke. “You told me you love me”.

“I didn'”.

“Yea', when I was helping you to get outta your dress”.

You frown, gasping and trying to say something else. But you're getting so nervous that you can fall down unconscious.

“'Course I love you, you're ma' best friend, idiot”.

“Not in tha' way, shithead”.

“Wha' you wanna hear, uh?” You ask crossing your arms and curling a leg. “Yea', 'am fuckin' in love with you, but who cares? You're not. Easy. I get it. Get outta 'fuck of my bike. I'm tired and I wanna go home to keep rolling in my misery”. Taking away your keys and pushing him, you sit on.

“Who the fuc' said I'm not? 'Cause I didn'”.

Turning your head at him in slow motion, you wrinkle your nose, shaking your head for a second as if you didn't hear what you actually heard.

“'Don' know. Maybe your rude texts? The fuck you did? The fuck is wrong with you? Why you kiss me?”

“I though' you lost a bet with the fuckin' boy scout”.

“What da'... Why I... Are you fuckin' stupid?”

“No, you are! You're the one who's giving me the back!”

You sigh taking off the helmet to put it in the handle bar, as you do with your leather gloves. You're gaze is down, staring at the keys in the lock, unable to look at him. You didn't act as you should and now you don't know what is worse.

“I'm sorre'”. You mutter looking him sideways.

“Yea', you better did, bech'. 'Cause I didn' fuc' anyone for one year waitin' you and you kissed me in a weak moment”.

“Jesus Christ, Johnny!” You start to laugh loudly with your hands on your lap, licking your lips. “Sweet Jesus Christ... You're a fuckin' moron, I swear to god”.

“Move your fuckin' pretty ass to ma' house, mami. Dare to do agai' what you did last night”.

“I accept that bet, Coconut”.

[teamsarawatshusband]

Word Of Honor - 1st watch insta thoughts - Episode 5

Episode 1

Episode 2

Episode 3

Episode 4

FYI (If you haven't read the previous summaries): Smirky Xing = Wen Ke Xing, Baby Xu = Zhou Xu/alcoholic tanned tragic hero lord guy, pleated skirt soldier boss guy = shen something, 5th brother from 5 Lakes

But let’s get started with Episode 5:

Okay, pleated skirt soldier boss guy chases the grandparents away and then wants to take the two mini wangjis with him. But the tree undies master guy isn't having any of it. So pleated skirt soldier boss guy isn't on anybody’s side. I see.

And there is another mention of 5 lakes abusing their power. Ominous.

The kids even wanna stay with tree guy. Must be bad.

Oooooh, pleated skirt soldier boss guy is indeed after the glazed armor.

Oh, uncle Zhao and his peeps and everybody come to the rescue.

And uncle Zhao respects tree guy's wish to keep the wangjis. Is he genuinely a nice guy or just worried about everybody around, including Baby Xu and Smirky Xing and the kid?

Ooooh, super pretty scenery. Why can't we all live in places like that?

Wheee, they get to feast with the family. And Smirky Xing is reciting poetry again. Everybody likes him it seems.

LOL, Smirky Xing is trying to feed Baby Xu. Who must get headaches from all the eye rolling.

Yo, what's up with tree undies master guy, why is he coughing?

Wait, are the little Wangjis also the kids of some 5 lakes brother? (Sorry, random thoughts about how things piece together, and lots of confusion)

Somebody's shouting for help. What's happening?

Young leader of something something, it was gone too fast. He'll be called magenta leader guy, if he ends up important. Ah, wait, he's from Broken Sword Manor. Have we been there before? I forgot.

Oh and he's chased by a ghost. And there's the smiley potato things flying in again. So the red masked ghost gang?

Oh, okay both magenta leader of broken sword manor guy and tree undies master guy vanish in the fog.

Pleated skirt soldier boss guy acts like an ass around the kid, encouraging him to drink along while drunk himself. What a jerk.

Uncle Zhao saves him and sends both to bed - individually i mean, obviously - , and seems genuinely nice, but I don't trust him still.

Whoa, pleated skirt soldier boss jerk guy is awake and just pretended! Even more of a jerk. What is he up to?

Oh, Baby Xu spots him and follows. Thank goodness, somebody needs to keep an eye on the mean guys.

There's some masked dark figure fighting with pleated skirt soldier boss jerk guy.

Something is going on at the main gate, and everybody runs there. Except maybe Smirky Xing, he's just cautious in general.

Oh no, somebody hung tree undies master guy outside the main gate. And it's raining smiley potatoes. Baby Xu is watching and they're all suspecting some happy ghost, because there's a batman-joker smile carved into the dead guys' faces. And happy ghost is apparently one of the masked ghost gang, which makes sense, because of the potato smiley paper crafts.

Oh, now they're worried about the kid. Was it a trap?

No, he's with Smirky Xing and Baby Xu. How did Baby Xu get back there so fast?

Okay, Smirky Xing says some masked ghost guys were going after the kid but were bad fighters and he instantly chased them away. But can that be trusted? If he himself is nuts guy, they wouldn't fight him, would they? But then again... if he were one of them, why would he spare the kid? None of this makes sense.

Okay, magenta leader guy isn't dead yet. He's in some bed, and somebody is lying in bed with him. Some woman. Who is she? Oh, she says she's a ghost. Wait, does he know her? So has she REALLY died, like a dead ghost, not one of those living ghosts?

Dude, stop begging, if she IS a ghost, she's not gonna let you go, you fool.

Oh, ghost girl channels her inner Arya Stark and drops her face for effect.

And magenta leader guy faints like a good damsel in distress.

Wait, she has a face again, but a different one (I think, not entirely sure) and she's one of the ten devils of ghost valley. A beauty ghost. Yeah, she's really pretty alright. And she's got a ton of friends with her.

Okay, what are they going to do with the unconscious guy? Kill him? They're just sharing make-up tips so far.

Baby Xu is trying to say goodbye to the kid. Aww, but the kid is gonna miss his dads. :(

There's a  flashback to some kid crying. There was also a name but I have no idea who he is. Was it Baby Xu?

Baby Xu sees a rooftop and flies up, I have no idea why. Was there something suspcious about the building? Huh?

Oh, somebody's pissed because their glazed armor got stolen. Ah it's pleated skirt soldier boss jerk guy and uncle Zhao who's not pissed just sad. Ohhh, so the ghost guys just wanted to steal the glazed armor and anything else was a decoy. I see.

Ahhhh, Baby Xu is on top of the roof, removing the tiles and listening in on their conversation, right when they say no outsider could know anything. Wow, they sure have a foolproof system.

Ok, 5 brothers of 5 lakes kept the 5 pieces of glazed armor? That does make sense.

Wait, why is nobody confused about pleated skirt soldier boss jerk guy being awake and sober all of a sudden????? Had uncle Zhao known that he was only pretending?

Man, that guy is made of pure anger and insults. If he dies at some point, he's probably gonna explode like a pinata hit by a dozen sticks at once, just because all the anger needs to get out first.

Ok, mad respect for uncle Zhao, because he is indeed a good guy it seems. He is capable of feeling guilt, and he doesn't want anything to do with the glazed armor anyway.

Okay, pleated skirt soldier boss jerk guy from now on will be called a-hole guy. Because, if the shoe fits...

BabyXu sees Smirky Xing flying away and is confused as to how he could also eavesdrop without being noticed by Baby Xu. I mean, that was Smirky Xing, wasn't it?

Oh, smirklord flying over the tree tops.

Yeah, Baby Xu, I wanna know too what Smirky Xing is up to.

Aww, "our little cheng ling". Smirky Xing is already feeling their dad status.

Oooooooh, Smirky Xing saved Baby Xu from the spiderweb wire stuff.

Okay, some ghost talk, I have no clue what's going on. lol

I'm focusing on the important details. Like Smirky Xing fishing for info on Baby Xu's virginity.

Wait, who's bleeding from above?

Ah, there's the sleeve cutting. Yes. Nice.

Oh the dead guy in the tree is the son of uncle Zhao? Wait, was he fighting with the dark masked guy? Not a-hole guy? Did I get them confused? I am so unable to understand anything, lol. I hate being faceblind. Somebody please let me know in the comments who did what while the manor was under attack.

Okay, dark masked guy's face is also shown and Bab Xu drops a name. I have no idea who that was, nor do I recognize the face. I'm so bad at this. Help?

WTH is "iron hook"??? Is that some special martial arts technique that only a few people can do?

Now they're speaking in riddles about animals. Owls, cicadas, yellow sparrows, praying mantisses. I have no idea what's happening. But it seems to be some sort of flirting.

Ok, now Smirky Xing says he's afraid of ghosts. I'm not sure if I believe that. He’s kinda looking a lot like nuts guy, after all, who is part of the ghost gang himself.

Oh, sure. When you're afraid of ghosts and more people dying... just go into the coffin house, because that makes so much sense.

Ooooh, Baby Xu saved Smirky Xing from the spider web stuff this time. Niiiiice.

Aww, they're asking each other who they are. So... does that mean Baby Xu is interested after all? Hehe

Smirky Xing answers that he's a good person. Yeah, like that's not the exact thing a bad guy would say. Not suspicious at all.

Why are there paper animals all over the place anyway? Can anybody tell me?

Also, who lit the incense sticks?

Why are they splitting up? That's how you end up dead in a horror movie, wth???

Wait, what? That's Smirky Xing's dad? His dad looks the same age as him? Is he hallucinating?

Whoa, why is it day time? Ohhh, blurred vision. Definitely something shady going on.

Baby Xu is hallucinating people too, I think. Leader of Four Season's Manor. Is that his dad? Zi Shu, wait, was that Baby Xu's real name?

Anyway, dad guy is doing an Anna impression and asking Elsa Xu to build a snowman.

Oh, Baby Xu saw through the hallucination. Got out of it by cutting himself. He really is into pain, isn't he?

Eww, zombie guys. What did I say about horror movies? But, nice make-up!

Oh no, Smirky Xing is still stuck in the visions.

And, more fabric is cut off. Baby Xu really doesn't like blood. Smirky Xing was not wrong.

HOLY SHIT! Smirky Xing called Baby Xu by his real name while hallucinating. So they DO know each other!!! :O

And THAT'S when they end the episode??? NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

Gah!!!!!

Okay, okay. I'm calm.

So, what have I learned: 5 lakes alliance can't be trusted. A-hole guy is a complete jerk. AND SMIRKY XING KNEW BABY XU WHEN HE WAS A KID!!! Also, side note, I miss my purple queen :(

Goals for the next episodes: Find out how they know each other!!! Also, why doesn't Baby Xu recognize Smirky Xing? Is he also disguised? I still need to work on the name chart thing, because there's new characters showing up in every episode and I'm so lost.

[the-wee-woo-royal]

Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness 🤔

We fought for these ideals, we shouldn't settle for less ☝😌

These are wise words, enterprising men quote 'em 😳

Don't act surprised, you guys, 'cause I wrote 'em 😉

Owww 😜

But Hamilton forgets 😥

(I'm was trying to match the emojis to the lyrics)

His plan would have the government assume state debts. 😝

Now place you bets on who that benefits... the very seat of government where Hamilton sits. 😤

Ohhhh🙃

If the shoe fits where it. If New Yorks in debt, why should virgina fare it. 😒

Heyyy, our debts are paid I'm afriad, don't tax the south cuz we got it made in the shade.😎

In virgina, we plant seeds in the ground. We create, we don't wanna move our money around.🙁

This financial plan is an outrageous demand and too many damn pages for any man to understand.😡😉

Stand wth me, the land of the free, and pray to God we never see Hamilton candidacy. 😔

When Britain taxed our tea., we got frisky. Imagine what gon happen when you try and tax our whiskeyyyyy😎😎😎

Thank you secretary Jefferson, Secretary Hamiltion... your response.

(I wanted to go by memory and I think I got it all😎👏)

[thirstybtsthoughts]

hey, Bunny! so I saw a video recently where a guy showed a nice place to go in Seoul (either on a date or just with some friends). And it was the Han River Park (looked so nice, my nature loving ass might have cried). And you can rent tandem bikes and EVEN A SMALL TENT to chill there. and while this all is nice and romantic and sweet, at some point my mind went off. and can you imagine being there on a date with one of the boys and you're being all nice and sweet together and rent a tent (1/?)

order some food and just chill in the tent. and then it gets darker and darker and you're still there, having a wonderful time. but at some point his hands start to wonder your body more and more often, he starts licking his lips more often when looking at you. and then he moves his hand into your short and starts rubbing you in the tent - "be a good girl. we both know you want this just as much as I do" - and you zip up the entrance to the tent so you're more "hidden" however little (2/?)

then he moves closer, his lips at your ear - "please, baby, wanna taste you, wanna lick you off my fingers" - and starts fingering you faster and kissing you to keep you as quiet as possible. after you come he licks you off his fingers and moans around them - "please, baby, gotta be inside you. need you so much" - and then you'Re fucking inside the tent, kissing to keep each other fomr moaning too loudly. I'm praying this happens to me one day. not necessary with one of them, but wth my bae(3/3)

__________________________

Hello! Holy shit you wrote this so well and maybe I’m just horny af but this turned me on so much aahhhhhh... obviously I imagined this with Kook, but my mind also wandered to Joon because of him and his bike rides by the river 🥵💦 Dammnnn thanks for deeing my thirsty mind -  I love it 🥵🥵🥵🥵

[lovemesomesurveys]

Do you feel bored with your life? I do feel that way, some days more so than others. Like some days even the few things I like to do, like Tumblr and surveys, just don’t cut it.  Who’s someone you miss that you haven’t talked to in years? Ty. Do you miss anyone who was mean to you in the past? No. How do you feel right now? Tired. Do you have severe withdrawals from medications? I imagine I would if I had to stop taking my pain medication. 

What’s the most weight you’ve ever gained from a medication? I’ve never had weight gain from a medication. Do you have a doctor you can trust? I just answered this in the previous survey. Wth is going with these surveys, man. So many will have the same questions, and not just the basic ones that like all surveys have, but ones that should be more random like this.  What’s the stupidest decision you ever made? Oh where to start. The health related ones definitely top the cake. There were things I could have and should have done, but didn’t for some stupid reason. I should have taken better care of myself.  What’s the best thing that ever happened to you? When my younger brother was born (cue the “awwwwww”). I was 9 and may not have been psyched about having a brother at first (sorry!), but he’s the best little bro ever. Turned out so much better than me. He should be the older one, honestly. I look up to him. And also of course all the doggos I’ve been fortunate to have in my life. How old were you the first time you encountered God? When I was a young kid, but I didn’t really understand it and then I got to be older and went through many years of being atheist and agnostic. I was led back to Him when Ty came back into my life in late 2015. Have you ever been filled with the Holy Spirit? I believe so. Have you ever had an encounter with the supernatural? No. How many tattoos do you have, and what are they of? I don’t have any. How do you get through hard times? * I dont rlly do anything all that different. Like, my overall routines dont rlly change, I still do mostly the same stuff on a day-to-day basis. I do try to find more comforting and distracting things to do, tho, and I try to be extra kind and patient toward myself when Im struggling or when life puts some bit of unwanted chaos in my path, ahah <<< Same for the first part about not doing anything different in regards to what I do and my overall routines staying the same, but also trying to distract myself more. I’ve been going through a really hard time for a long time, but here we are. That being said, I’m not doing anything to try and better it, and that’s where my issue is.  What’s the most physically painful thing you’ve ever experienced? The pain after surgical procedures.  What’s the worst level of emotional pain you’ve ever experienced? Losing loved ones and my depression, particularly these past few years. Have you ever been suicidal? Not actively. I can’t say I’ve never thought about it, but I’ve never seriously planned anything or tried anything. I’m too scared and I don’t want to hurt my loved ones. And truthfully, I don’t really want to die. I just want to start living. I want to not feel this way anymore and not have this battle with my mind and feeling as sad and miserable and crappy as I do. I want to live a live I’m passionate about and actually do something. Do you pray? If yes, to whom? Yes, to God. Do you ever feel lost and alone? “If you’re lost and alone, and sinking like a stone, carry onnnnn.” What do you miss about high school? I mean, I wouldn’t wanna go back, but there were some good parts. It had its ups and downs.  What do you miss the most about college? I’ve answered this recently. Did you like high school? Like I said, it had its ups and downs. What was the name of the first dorm you lived in? I never lived in a dorm. What was the last thing that made you angry? Blah. Have you ever been the victim of a crime? Yes. I’m a victim of a drive-by shooting. Is your life worse than you could have ever have imagined it to be? I mean, I didn’t imagine my life being how its been these past few years... …or is it better, or just what you expected? No. Are you married? No. Are you hurting in any way right now? Yes. Are you currently missing someone? There’s a few people I’ll always miss. What are you wearing? Black leggings and a gray Nirvana shirt. What was the last flavor of tea you drank? Peppermint.  Do you feel like youtube’s gotten boring lately? No. What would you change about your hair if you could? I just need to get it dyed and trimmed. Are you jealous of anyone? No. Do you have a secret? Maybe. If you could tell anyone a secret right now, who would it be? No one. Do you miss someone that you blew it with? Yes. I’ll always regret how things went with Ty.  Is there a guy (or girl) you wish you hadn’t screwed things up with? Yeah, Ty. What was the best date you’ve ever been on? Coffee shop and bookstore dates with Ty. What’s the last great song you discovered? Hmm. Do you prefer color or black and white? I like both, just depends. Do you own a thermometer? Yeah. Has facebook gotten boring lately? Yeah it kinda is.  Do you feel free to post how you feel on facebook? I don’t really post anything on there anymore, especially not anything personal or about my opinions on big topics.  Which stereotype do you fit the most? Don’t know, don’t care. What is your favorite fast food restaurant? Burger King, Taco Bell, Chick-Fil-A, McDonalds, and Jack in the Box. I haven’t been into fast food; though, the past couple months, which is very odd for me.  What is the most beautiful landscape you have ever seen? For my birthday we took a gondola ride up 9000ft and got the most beautiful view of the mountains, lake, and city. It was incredible.  What is one place you have always wanted to visit? Hawaii. What was your favorite vacation you went on as a child? Disneyland. Who were your favorite celebrities as a child? I was the 12/13/14 year old with tons of posters all over my wall from magazines.  What was the first CD you bought? I think the 1st one I bought myself was Ashlee Simpson’s CD, Autobiography. ha.  How old are you? 30. What year were you born? 1989. Did you go to prom? Yes. Are you jealous of people who are ten years younger? I’m kind of envious in some ways. For one, they’re 20 years old aka babies and not old like me haha. But second of all, they’re really just starting out. I’m envious of the ones who are living their best lives and having fun and the ones who are starting college and making the best of it while also having a good social life. People at 20 still have so much time ahead to figure things out, and that I’m very envious of. If you could rewind time ten years, would you? It would be tempting. There’s so much I’d like to do differently. The thought of going through college all over again isn’t appealing, though. But man. Some changes that I’d like to change might make it worth it, though.. they would make such a big difference for me. Some of the things I’m dealing with now I don’t think I would be if I did some things differently. What do you miss the most about your past? I miss my childhood the most. Do you like getting older? Not at all. What is the last song you played on repeat? Hm. I’m not one to really play songs on repeat, so I don’t recall. Do you own a CD player? Nope. What hard thing are you going through right now, if applicable? My health and life stuff. What do you need prayer for? Good health and strength.  Are you ok? “I’m not okay, I’m not o-fucking-kay.” What’s the best retreat you’ve ever been on? I haven’t been on a retreat.  Do you love free falling? “Now I’m freeeeeee. Free fallin’.” Do you prefer slow songs or fast songs? I like both. Have you made any progress toward going after your dreams? No. I don’t even have any dreams to work towards right now. Who encourages you to go after your dreams? My family definitely would. They always have. Do you have regrets? Do I ever. Does anyone really know you? I don’t even really know me. I’ve changed these past few years and became someone I don’t know and certainly don’t like. I’m struggling with whether this is who I really am now, or am I like this because of my depression and health stuff? I really don’t know. Are you close to anyone right now? My mom and brother. What color is your trash can? The one in my room is white. Do you know anyone who is stuck-up? Yes. What color is your dresser? Brown. Are you more boho, hipster, sporty, goth, or girly? I’m just casual. What were your favorite clothing stores in high school? Hot Topic, Macys, JCP... I don’t really remember where else I shopped in high school.  Do you drive a car? No. If not, do you wish you had a car? I don’t drive, so I have no use for a car. Do you own a computer? If yes, is it a desktop or laptop? I have a laptop. What color is your cell phone? Coral. How old were you when you first got a cell phone? 16. What is your favorite season? Fall. Do you wish you had a popsicle right now? No. I’m not a popsicle person. Or ice cream in general, really. I rarely have any. It’s been like 3 years since I’ve had any. Who was your favorite family pet when you were growing up? My dog, Scruffy. He was with us from the time I was 5 until I was 18. What’s your favorite color? Pastels, yellow, mint green, rose gold, and coral. Do you like pineapple on pizza? Nope. List five of your favorite youtubers. Nah. Who’s your best friend? My mom. If you don’t have one, who do you wish were your best friend? Is your heart hurting? Not physically, but yeah. What song are you listening to right now, if any? I’m not. At what time of day do you usually feel the most energetic? Never? What medication or drug has given you the worst withdrawals? I’m sure my pain med would. 

[ain-t-bovvered]

14x08 Commentary

Zeta and Giuls scream together, and then die.

Me & Zeta will watch together season 14′s episodes as they come out and we’ll do our commentary while watching.

1 2  3  4  5  6  7

14x08 Byzantium

Guys I don’t know if I can be funny this episode.

-....HER?! WHAT. ....oooooh they are gonna do something stupid aren’t they?

Zeta: can I not see Jack like this please?

- “please don’t be sad”

Zeta : Sam? Not sad? ..lol

-is Dean there to choose an album ? wth ...also damn son can you all stop looking like pain in the flesh?

- the oxygen tank?....naaah fam I’m good, bye I can’t. Zee give me the strength to keep going because I’m gonna throw myself out the window 

- oh shit...the scene....the promo scene that killed us all.

Zeta : Cas doesn’t know who to worry about anymore.

- Everyone but himself that’s for sure

-Oh my god SAM, omg Jared you and your eyes are gonna kill me this season.

Zeta : “what happens next?” 

-oh shit I didn’t think about it.

both: we are gonna die too

- “an adventure”

Zeta : is he serious?!?!

-Oh Dean really doesn’t want to be there.

Zeta : LOOK AT ALL THE HURT

- D: “I can’t..”  bitch me too the fuck

- ..pAiN

- C:” He NEEDS you “

- S:”He’s gone” 

-asgajsvdaksdasdh WHAT

- I can almost taste the guilt seasoned with pain right there.

Zeta : the fuck?!

- THAT WAS FAST . U KIDDIN’ , WHAAAAAAT THEEEEE FUUUUCK

Zeta : I’m speechless. I can’t even focus on the bowlegs.

- Dean talking about the hunter’s funeral and Sam can’t fucking take it

-OH I love Sam’s stance, beautiful.....aaaaand he’s gone.

-My soul and whole being is hurting but boy that was an amazing Destiel moment and that’s the shit I wanna see.

- Damn, Cas is spiriling 

Zeta : Cas is obliterated

-.... OF COURSE THERE IS A VOICEMAIL. Dean’s annoyed af face at his mom’s voicemail is giving me life, and look....my skin is already clearer. 

Zeta : Like the bitch cares

- Castiel clutching Kelly’s pic , probably thinking he failed yet again.  lol I wanna die....it would hurt less.

- SAM NO

Zeta : where is he going??

-I hope not doing anything stupid

Zeta : I can’t watch them like that bitch

-CASS IS DRIVING!, CASS IS DRIVING , WHAT. HOW. WHAT. I love that is Cass who is driving

Zeta : Dean’s not driving??

- FUCK YEAH

- Probably Sam took Baby and Dean was like....listen babe I’m not even gonna touch that suburban mom’s steering wheel I don’t wanna feel dirty. Baby could smell it and you know how jealous she is.

-”Why did you let him leave?” WELL HE DID AS U ASKED BITCH

- AND HE’S WEARING THE SEAT BELT!!  my European's ass is singing ( is it true that y’all americans don’t have to use it? because....wild and also why. Here if they catch you without the seat-belt they skin your ass)

- kill me with that axe

Zeta : something’s wrong here.

-Yeah...they are hurting so much, I hate it. What the fuck is it with everybody’s eyes, fuck me.

Zeta : I think n.1 dad was Sam

-Nah....Cass is #1 Dad , Sam related to Jack. Dean is the step dad who didn’t think could love the kid and now he’s fucked because he love him too.

Zeta : “Taken before me”

Zeta : We get loaded

- omg do we get to see them drunk? omg yes.

Zeta : Please call help

- Is THat NOugAt?

-OMFG 

Zeta : bitch

-AAAAAAAAAAAH CAS SMILE AND LAUGH THAT IS JUST SO MISHA OMFG.

- But Castiel entering the room a bit unsteady and with two bottle ? FUCKING MOOD.

Zeta : I love drunk Dean

-WHAT

.

.WHAT WAS THAT LOOK BETWEEN THEM . WHAT.

my soul....hurts stop it.

-Awe Sam....lol weak.

- Cause of death : Dean slurred drunk sad voice, “We did everything we could right?” 

Zeta : HIS VOICE

-”I’m gonna teach you how to read a map”

I can’t deal bitch

-THe DoubLE StRaws

-someone needs to change that lightbulb.

Zeta : Heaven

- THe fuck

Zeta :...Hell..?

- what’s up with shining there

- Dean’s dying groan in the morning: MOOD, SAME.

Zeta : you got old

- Cass and Sam looking fresh and stylish as always .

[enters Dean] the trashcan is heeeeere

- rebooting Dean.exe 

Zeta : he can’t even english

-shhh

- oh....no

both: PASS

- but what is the priiiiceeee

Zeta : simple as that

- ...well I mean...fair. I guess she wants to meet her daughter and shit 

Zeta : seriously?

-Well we already saw Osiris.

Zeta : Major Dick

-When god left - sorry long story- .

-Oh...no who ARE YOU

Zeta :he does that thing with the eyes.

-WHATSAHFDBF

Zeta : What the hell

- I wanna cry. I am crying

Zeta : thanks, the last part of my heart just withered and died

- Oh no wait until she realize he’s dead

Zeta : aaaaaand

- ...here it comes

- Boi this season is painful

Zeta : Peach, it rhymes with bitch

-oh he really doesn’t like her

- S: “ Taking risks , making crappy deals. The family business “

-”AWESOME”

- “ MORE AWESOME”

Zeta : Was that black goo Lucifer?

- I can’t tell honestly, maybe him and the Empty made a path or something IDK.

-I don’t like when Castiel leaves alone. Bad things happen .

-Sam head tilt lol.

Zeta : forced smile much. 

Zeta :look at him ( Dean)

- AH TOLD YA

-Heaven looking nice as always

- I do like seeing Castiel in heaven

Zeta : natural habit and I do love angels clothes

- yeah....50 shades of gray

Zeta : hello Bitch

- *gritted teeth* Naomi

Zeta : He was THAT annoying

- THAT ACCENT THO

- Naomi : Give it what it wants

Cas: 

- Cass: “ NO”

-no bitch , Jack he’s everything wtf.

- So Nick woke up the Empty then? *dean’s voice* AWESOME

So now there are 2 big baddies ?

*dean’s voice* MORE AWESOME

- SNAPPY

Zeta : pushing pencils , damning souls

-MY KIND OF WORK

-oh u going down that’s what

Zeta : I’d prefer the scale and the feather

- but the abacus has more sense tho...like....counting good deeds and bad ones, like in the good place right? Can we see the Winchesters using that? I bet the thing would explode.

Zeta : that went well

- Sorry bitch what did u expect

- oooooh what was that little chuckle Castiel stop killing me this season. It burned

Zeta : it stung

- “I failed you” 

 K: “ you didn’t....Jack...he’s wonderful “

*bawling* YES HE IS 

- Misha need to control that eyebrow or so help me god.

Zeta : he needs to control his whole face bitch

- I fucking hate where the angels goes when they die ok

Zeta : fuck

- OH BITCH. *dramatic zoom*

- “He’S OuR KiD”

KIIIIID

*bawling*

Zeta : look at Dean

-MY GOD

both: don’t do this to us

- Empty : “SToP iNteRrupTinG!”  Damn bitch, pipe the fuck down

Zeta : crazy ass bitch

  I     LOVE     HER

- I love how she’s doing the Empty. like....*slow clapping*

Empty: “Where I’m taking you is worse than Hell” 

oh well you are definitely selling the place

- Empty:” Oh god they look scared. Does that hurt you?”

- *Cass brandishing his angel blade* .... 

me already knowing where this is going: oh honey...no

-Puppy Winchesters eyes always wins

Zeta : He can’t hear you.....oh he can

- .... Is that how he is every time Dean pray to him?

When Dean prays:

SAME

me seeing Castiel getting up :

Castiel: TAKE ME

Zeta : take me instead

- he’s so.....snarly....

Zeta : I bet you are drooling

- I am.

 A dumb fucking angel: “You want me”

me: I do

A dumb fucking angel: “I would go now and I would go willingly “

me: no u don’t

-NO , NO DEAL, FUCK YOU, FUCK U.

Empty: “ oh “ creepy chuckle “but not now” sharps intakes of breath “ no no no, you see ...what I meant....I want you to suffer . I want you to go back to your own life and forget about this and forget about me and when you finally give yourself permission to be happy...and let the sun shine on your face ...that’s....when I’ll come. That’s when I’ll come to drag you to nothing”

Zeta :She’s goooood

- Castiel: “I accept”

oh look it’s me when I’ll meet Misha ^

and now for an out of context gif: 

-She’s so good. I love her BUT FUCK THE EMPTY

- “Because I love you Jack”  CRYING CRYING.

- C: “ They don’t need to know what happened”

Zeta : of course they don’t.

- Jack: “ I won’t tell them” 

OH so now Jack drove the Impala, snacked on burgers, has hunted, has died and now he has to lie and keeps secret?

CONGRATULATIONS YOU ARE NOW A 

- ...

NO 

FUCK , CASS YOU DAMN SELFLESS BITCH.

IMMA SMACK HIM.

hold me back bitch because imma smack his face

Zeta : control yourself bitch

-NO IMMA SMACK HIS ASS

Zeta : I can’t wait for the gag reel of this part.

Omg Kelly babe . I’m so glad they met .

-WHAT WAS THAT FACE AGAIN CASTIEL

Zeta : dEAD

- J:”Good, I feel good”

WELL I DON’T *hiss*

-oh that hug. omg my heart

- oh well....uh look at dat I fucking bet that the sacrifice got her heaven watch that.

HI LOOK HOW FUCKING HAPPY HE IS TO BRING HOME SO MUCH WIN ?!?!

friendly reminder that he just like...sold his” soul” to the Empty, tell me again that Castiel doesn’t care.

-...Naomi you bitch why couldn’t you tell that before?

Zeta : because she’s a bitch

- D: “ And we know where Michael is, not sure how you pulled that one off “ *side eyeing Cas* 

me: *HISS*

- don’t make me think about the fact that Dean cooked those burghers ( as you can see from the counter) while he looked happily at his family reunited . lol *sobs*

- There is a warm happy feeling in my chest right now. I don’t like it, can’t wait for the writers to rip it off my chest pretty soon.

Zeta : is he wearing the dead man’s robe?

. ....yep

Zeta : I’m dead inside

- Dead with a slither of happiness that will get choked out of us, just you wait.

...

...

WAIT A MINUTE 

*goes back*

wHAT IS THIS SHIT OMFG DEAN 

IT’S FINE

.

.

.

If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @supernatural-teamfreewillpage  @destiel-honeypie   @mariekoukie6661   @dragontamerm @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat   @bunnybaby121115  @aliaitee @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc

[maiverie]

#FREERI 🥲🤞

OH YES MY HAIR IS RED NOW 🥰‼️ nowhere near as bright as when jungwon or heeseung did ut bc i think my mum would have a heart attack it’s like dark red ITS SO SLAY

ahhh i pray that you can find a good hairdresser 🫶🫶 my aunt is a hairdresser so she comes and does it for me and my sisters,,

she’s literally so cool i only mentioned redyeing my hair last week and then she literally texted me on wednesday and was like what colour do u want and then she just went to her salon picked it up and came over yesterday!!

DARK RED???? HELLAAURRRR i bet it looks so good oml i’m crying 😭😭😭 hold up i’m so jealous wtf i wanna dye my hair so bad 🥲 also respectfully ri’s mum back off pls 😍 dark red hair is so slay fr

UR AUNT DID IT??? PAUSEEE WHY ARE U DOING THIS TO ME IM ACTYALLY YELLING IM CRYING 😭😭 are u guys willing to adopt me or smth 🥲🥲🥲omg ure so lucky wth but pop off queen thats SO GOOD????? she can even help u w maintenance and everything ☹️💖 IM SO GLAD U LIKE IT THO JAKDJEKFJEK I BET IT LOOKS SAUR AMAZING

[philocalygray]

happy happy birthday my love! you deserve all the wonderful things in the world. you are a pure and beautiful soul and you have the biggest heart. we never really talked before but my days are so much brighter because i enjoy seeing you on my dash a lot. i pray it changes between us for the better and we can become friends!! have the most wonderful birthday, sweetie :3

omg...this was lovely to read!! made my heart melt, thank you, you’re so sweet!!! don’t be afraid to talk to me! i don’t bite;)♥♥ feel free to message me anytimeee. i wanna see who the anon is behind this beautiful message:)) and fyi: we already are friends!! i love you so much wth 💜💜💜💜