#ppl fight. i get that. but if they were both sober then a) they would keep it quieter b) they probably wouldnt have started it

[satans-knitwear]

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[callme-darling]

all these ppl in ur asks talking abt Pierre has me tweaking thinking about a continuation of ur rival!pierre fic where he picks a fight w u in front of everyone then goes on to worship u when yall r alone 😵‍💫😵‍💫

the cow prince & the dairy queen (pt.2)

word count: 2.8k

warnings: rivals with benefits dynamic, pierre is a bit of a prick, smut, little plot, fingering, p in v, unprotected sex, car sex, mentions of alcohol, pls let me know if i missed anything

a/n: this isn’t really a finished piece, but pls accept these pierre chavanges crumbs🙏🏻 (side note: this is lowkey FILTHY)

you can find pt.1 here

it had been a few weeks since yours and pierre’s fling in the pasture. a part of you was content to leave it as that—a one time act of lust; nothing more, nothing less. you both seemingly went back to your respective work; tending to your own farms with little more than an occasional nod or glare in the others direction depending on the day.

you would have been happy to never speak of it, let alone think of it. it seems, however, your happiness is irrelevant when it comes to circumstance.

fabrice was hosting a small, informal get together for the community. well technically another of his friends put it all together, fabrice simply agreed to host it at his house. and just about everyone in town was invited; including, of course, pierre chavanges.

initially, you were going to decline the invitation, but it was rare to see anyone else these days, and rarer still to be able to talk to them for more than a fleeting passing-by. so you agreed and gave fabrice a kind thanks before hanging up the phone. and now you stand in his yard, mentally kicking yourself to be so naive to think this was a good idea.

all was well for the first half hour or so. you made amiable conversation with some people you knew, some you didn’t, and the plastic cup in your hand was a comforting weight of liquid courage. yes, all was well—until you heard a loud chorus of cheers come from near the house. instantly, you smile fell when you saw whose presence was the cause for the ruckus.

you secretly had hoped he would decline the invitation, much like you almost had. but, also like yourself, he must have felt a keen obligation to his friends to at least make an appearance.

and almost immediately, your eyes met. his eyes narrowed in on you, like a predator singling out the weakest of the herd. you finish your drink and slide into a thicker part of the crowd, hoping to get the pair of lingering eyes off of you.

for nearly an hour you succeeded in avoiding one another. but then, as the party gradually began to taper off and more people began to head for their respective homes, you were drug into fabrice’s kitchen for a ‘final round’ before officially calling it a night.

and to everyone’s surprise, and your dismay, pierre had managed to stick it out too.

everyone was in boisterous conversation while you studied the contents of the cup in your hand, the earthy beer a little musty to your tastes.

“say, y/n-“ you’re pulled from your thoughts by one of the guys, “you’ve been awfully quiet tonight. don’t tell me we’re boring you.”

you force a small laugh at the jest, your eyes briefly glancing around the small room, unsurprised to find pierre looking straight at you. “no, no,” you shake your head, reclining your hips against the counter. “just been a long day.”

“the queen probably finds our conversations below herself.” the guys laugh heartily at pierre’s cheap jab. you just roll your eyes, you and pierre are easily the most sober in the room, so you excuse the others. but your glare finds pierre’s easily.

his tall friend picks up on the animosity quickly despite his inebriation, his eyes glimmering with drunken glee as he points, “ooh c’mon guys. let’s not fight, you’re both equally insufferable when you get like this.”

“i’m perfectly fine. i’m afraid it’s your friend who can’t get off his high horse.”

pierre doesn’t break eye contact as he tilts his head slightly, “she’s right. we should be nice to her majesty. we all know she’s had a rough season, after all.”

“the hell is that supposed to mean, chavanges?” your grip tightens around your cup enough to make the thin material crackle.

everyone else seems to catch the tension in the atmosphere shift from friendly pestering to something more hostile. everyone but pierre, whose lips ever so slightly twitch into a shit eating grin.

“what do you think it sounds like?”

you hold his hard stare for a long moment. ‘it’s not worth it’ you decide. you turn slightly to pour the remnants of your drink into the sink. “it sounds like it’s time for me to excuse myself.”

the boys make sounds of disapproval, some of them throwing their arms up at pierre in a silent complaint of ‘what the hell man?’, but pierre only kept his steely eyes on you, an air of indisputable satisfaction behind his expression.

you’re walking along the dirt road that’ll take you home when a set of yellow headlights illuminate your shadow. you shuffle to the side of the path, nearly standing in the shallow ditch when the vehicle slows to a stop just behind you.

“get in, princess.”

you roll your eyes when the distinct tone of pierre’s voice hits your ears. you ignore him and begin walking in the direction of your house again. a strong gust of wind wips past you. instinctively, your arms wrap around your midsection as you grumble under your breath.

pierre merely inches his truck forward, it’s muddied wheels creeping alongside you. “c’mon, get in the truck. it’s freezing.”

you grit your teeth. “i’d rather take my chances freezing then, thanks”

he chuckles and the sound nearly has you seeing red. “go the fuck home, chavanges.”

it didn’t matter how cold you were, or how nice a ride in the warm truck cab sounded. you were not so desperate to grant him the gratification of doing you a favor, no matter how minuscule.

“christ y/n,” he practically growled in nothing short of annoyance, “get in the fucking truck.”

you stop walking, a huff of warm breath dissipating into the cold air. you stand against the cold wind for a moment longer, feeling his eyes rake over you from behind. then with a resigned sigh, you wordlessly stalk to the passenger side of the truck and pull open the door.

neither of you say a word as you slip into the seat, but you can feel his eyes boring a hole in the side of your head.

“take a picture, it’ll last longer,” you finally say.

you catch the way his tongue prods the inside of his cheek before he starts driving along the quickly darkening road.

“you’re really pissed?” he asks after a long stretch of silence.

you’re looking out the window, forehead resting against the cool glass. “you’re really an asshole?”

“come on now, don’t be like that.”

you chuckle at the audacity of this man, though it comes out more like a scoff. “i take it back. you’re a piece of shit.”

“mm, that’s not what it sounded like when you were moaning my name,” he says flatly. “though, it has been a bit so maybe my memory is getting foggy.” and the pointed look he gave you left you with no need to discern what meaning lurked under the surface.

you held your breath as you leveled his gaze. the tension in the cab was oppressive. it took a good moment for you to realize he had parked his truck in one of the pull-offs. your mouth suddenly felt dry.

“tell me, princess,” you hated how your stomach fluttered at the way he said the nickname you hated so much, “does it make you angry when i do that?”

“you’re going to have to be more specific,” you breathe out. “you do a lot of things that piss me off.” you mentally curse when you catch yourself glimpsing to his lips.

he grins. “do you hate when i call you out, give you a hard time? does it make your blood boil?” he doesn’t give you a chance to answer before he’s leaning closer, his eyes sharp as they scan your face. “and does it make you angrier knowing that the guy who gets you so riled up is the same guy you let fuck you in a field a couple weeks ago?”

you swallow, jaw clenching as you turn to look out your window again. then in a moment of stupid courage, likely fueled by the traces of alcohol still running in your veins, you ask the first question that flashed in your mind.

“is this your way of saying once wasn’t enough for you?”

“yes.”

his reply was quick and void of any hints of deception. your lips parted when his answer shocked your system, instantaneously leaving you at a loss for words.

he gauged your reaction, eyes searching yours. when you say nothing, he sighs, though it’s more blasé than irritated. “you know, you’re real annoying when you go quiet like that. for all the complaining and whining you do, i know you have something in that little head of yours you want to say.” he reaches across the console of the truck to gently grab your chin. “yes or no?”

you didn’t need any further context to know what he was asking. you chew on the inside of your lip, chin titled ever so slightly by his thumb, and nod once.

“that won’t do.” he clicks his tongue and murmurs lowly, “use your words, princess.”

you lean in close, eyes steady on his as you whisper, “you can fuck me, chavanges, but i won’t beg.”

his eyes glinted with an unsaid challenge. the thumb holding your chin brushed over your bottom lip, the featherlight touch submerging your stomach in water. “we’ll see about that.”

when he pressed his lips to yours, you swear your senses completely shut everything else out. his movements were slow, languid, as his lips moved in time with yours. his tongue gently nudged past your lips.

even now, you can tell there’s been a shift since the time in the pasture. pierre was much more deliberate and subdued.

you could feel yourself leaning more into his touch, the top half of your body nearly laying on the center console. his rough hand found your jaw and pulled you even closer with a muffled groan.

you straddled his lap in the cramped truck, your ass threatening to bump against the horn until two hands pulled your hips securely on top of his. “fuck, you’re pretty like this.” the combination of his throaty compliment and his fingers digging into your hips had your breath hitching.

eyes half lidded, you peer down at him. your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself as you keep your face hovering over his. “what would you do if i just up and left? just got out of this truck of yours and left you here like this.”

pierre have you a cheeky grin, unadulterated confidence gleaming in his eyes. “we both know you wouldn’t.” he leaned close so his lips tickled your ear, “i fuck you too good for you to even consider it.”

“then you better not disappoint, chavanges.”

his grin only grew, grip on your hips moving to cup your ass. “don’t you worry, princess. just let me take care of ya.”

“oh? is the prince feeling chivalrous?”

a hand on your neck has your eyes fluttering as he whispers against your warm skin, “i suggest you be nice.” then his lips were on your throat, tongue teasing the sensitive flesh while his teeth nipped little red marks across your chest.

you fingers are in his hair as he undoubtedly leaves marks that won’t fade for a couple days over your skin. you’ll be irritated tomorrow, but for now you allow yourself to enjoy the feeling of his fleeting touch.

his large hands gave your ass another squeeze, grinding you against his jean-covered, half hard cock. you always hated how your body betrayed you, the way you can feel your pussy practically soaking through your panties and onto his lap.

pierre groans underneath you, his fingers pulling your shirt over your head, his other hand unclasping your bra with a fumbling grasp that only added to the heat of the truck. his lips abandon your neck in favor of your tits. his eyes watched you as he took one of your nipples into his mouth, rolling the sensitive nub under his tongue. his palm groped at your other breast, fingers teasingly pulling at your skin as you whine.

his mouth pulls off you with a minute wet ‘pop’. he grinned up at you, eyes no doubt studying the growing blush on your cheeks. “y’know, you sound prettier like this than when you’re bitchin’.”

you tugged his hair, a warning.

he ignores it. “fuck.. i can’t wait anymore.” it’s embarrassing, how your pussy clenched around nothing at his words. your chest shone with the warmth of his spit as his breath fans across your skin. you shudder as his fingernails skim up your arm and down the front of your collarbone. “gotta feel that little pussy of yours, been too long.”

the transition to you shimmying your worn jeans down your legs was anything but graceful, but pierre didn’t seem to mind as his own hips raised to deftly push his own pants to his thighs. the windows were already beginning to fog over with a sheen of warmth. you both took a moment, chests softly heaving in unison before pierre’s hands rubbed along your ribs and waist, wordlessly soothing the nerves crawling over your skin.

he brought his face closer to yours again, his nose nudging the column of your neck before inhaling. “been thinking about this since that day.”

you’d sooner take yourself out to pasture than admit you’d been the same. you could practically feel his sick twitch beneath the thin material of his boxers, the heat emanating from his body making your mind hazy. you whine despite yourself, pussy clenching around nothing when his finger traces over the elastic band of your panties.

“pierre, don’t tease.” it’s meant to be a warning, but it comes out breathier than needier than you anticipated.

his touch becomes more assertive, borderline experimental, as his thumb dips to the front of your crotch, easily ghosting over your clit while his eyes watch you with a glimmer of piqued enthusiasm. “are you in a rush?”

his warm breath paired with the tentative touches makes your eyes flutter. “i wanna take my time with you, this time.” finally, his long fingers tug the slick material covering your heat to the side. the calloused pads of his fingers tease your wet folds. you flush with a bright heat when the only sound in the truck is the audible wet clicking coming from pierre shamelessly playing with your soaked pussy.

your head falls to pierre’s shoulder, eyes squeezed shut as your hips twitch to meet his hand. there’s no doubt your bottom lip is gonna be bruised with how you’re biting into it, but it does little to stop the pathetic sounds from reaching his ears.

“fuck..” his low groan sends sparks down your spine. “you’re so fucking wet, i love it…”

as if to emphasize his words, he slips two long fingers into your dripping hole. your hands clutch onto his shoulders, nails pricking through his shirt but god- you were both so pent up at this point, any humiliation only added to the desperation.

pierre’s lips pressed a wet kiss onto your shoulder. the feeling of his fingers slowly dragging in and out of your cunt doubled with the material of your soft panties catching your clit with each shift of his palm, you were made pliant in a matter of minutes.

“god… missed this,” pierre stifles a groan when you clench around his fingers embarrassingly tight, “so much.”

a hand on your throat drags your face to his and his mouth is on you before you fully register his fingers leaving your heat. you’re holding back a whine when he finally frees his dick, blushed an angry red and leaking pre, from his boxers. your eyes are fixated on his cock and it only strokes his ego.

pierre’s breath warms the shell of your ear as he whispers, “you can deny it until you’re blue in the face, but i know you’ve been thinking about how i fuck you everyday since the field.”

you drag your gaze to meet his and even in the darkness of the truck cab, you can see the hunger in his eyes.

his thumb smears the precum from his tip down his shaft as he gives his cock a pump before you lift your hips. your head falls back slightly as you sink down onto his length. you both breathe softly when you finally bottom out, and it takes everything in you not to start bouncing on his lap.

instead, you bite back a small moan and give the man beneath you a heady glare, “you better not fall for me, chavanges.”

he returns it with a toothy grin, mouth already coming to hover over yours. “i definitely won’t fall for you. i just love to hate you.”

[autistic-katara]

@byler-alarmist taking this as an invitation to go off like i’m kicking my feet and twirling my hair and writing in a sparkly pink diary while idk what kinda music plays in the background soooooooo… (warning: due to my habit of going off-topic every 2 seconds this is pretty long so proceed with caution)

imma start at the beginning. basically u guys remember my best friend? the one who i lowkey highkey had a crush on who isnt into boys? anyways yeah he texted me and asked if i wanted to hang out tomorrow (today) and we ended up making plans to go to the city centre to idk hang out and yeah there was the problem that apparently my mum wanted to do like a family day out or smthn but we couldn’t do that cause my sister hurt her foot (look ella, ily and it sucks that that happened to u but also i am so fucking glad i was able to hang out w/ him today instead of the ppl i spend 24/7 with and half annoy me to death) anyways none of that was important so we ended up meeting and getting side tracked for a second again but while i was waiting for him at the train station this random police/security guard/person came up to me and got annoyed at me for having too long shoelaces or something (?) cause he just pointed at my feet and was like “ur laces” and “someone might trip” like ??? who tf are u, my teacher? (they were tied btw just kinda long) anyways yeah that was one of the random weird things that happened today anyways yeah he arrived and oh yeah while we were both on our respective trains there he texted me that he knew a place that would probably sell us alcohol (which considering we’re both 15 and the legal drinking age here is 18 was like definitely super illegal but literally who tf cares) and so yeah we ended up going there but it was a corner shop in like pretty far from the train station so we had to take the subway which omfg it’s so LOUD how tf did i manage to take it as a kid and not have a complete meltdown but yeah we got there and i gave him some money (cause i had way more money on me and he was less scared of getting IDed) and somehow his very obviously underage ass managed to get 2 cans of this alcoholic drink (it wasnt like insanely alcoholic like to quote him one can is “enough to get u a bit tipsy” but like still) anyways yeah we went to a park near there and sat by a tree while we drank it and talked and yeah we ended up talking abt some kinda but not rlly personal but also probably kinda concerning stuff that i’m not gonna mention for the aforementioned reasons but also fanfic and yeah turns out i’m good at writing the stuff he struggles with and hes good at writing the stuff i struggle with so we’re gonna try and co-write smthn at some point •u• anyways yeah also i recently got some new jeans and own some posca pens so have been drawing on them and yeah i brought some of the pens and he drew some hearts on the calf (bcz he couldn’t think of anything else) and yeah so that happened •///• [ur gonna have to endure me cringely emoticon-ing this i’m sorry this is what u signed up for when u let me diaryify my tumblr for a minute] anyways yeah also i seriously cannot handle alcohol well that only had like a tiny alcohol content and after chugging a can i felt like i was in a dream when it came to like movement n shit and i also ended up telling him abt how i used to like one of our mutual friends and thats why i agreed to fight her at his bar mitzvah (yes she was that crush and he was that friend with the bar mitzvah) and yeah apparently i’m the second person to have told him that (the crush thing not the fighting thing but thats just me assuming) anyways yeah after we sobered up a bit n allat we went back on the subway but to somewhere else cause the shops there r cool and yeah anyways finally getting to another actually super important part but we were talking abt like sexualities (specifically in relation to our younger selves // idk i’m not rlly sure how to explain the context so)

and yeah anyways we were talking and he said that “he was ace or gay bcz men” (or smthn like that i cant remember the actual wording) but DUDE HE LIKES GUYS !! (in some way, not sure if he meant he was aroace or gay, or ace or gay but still aro, or if he doesnt did as aro anymore at all, or if it was like hes ace/aroace AND gay, and yeah idk he got confused when i asked “in what way” and i was too high on caffine to find better wording TwT) which means i do actually have some sorta a chance (even if i dont know in what way or how much of one) aksjsjdjdjsks and yeah we ended up looking around some shops n stuff — also sidenote: we had like a lot more physical touch than usual. like he doesnt rlly like physical contact unless hes super close to the person and even tho we’ve been bsfs for like 3 years and friends for like 10 ive been way too scared to see if i’m close enough to him for that but yeah anyways it wasnt like we were holding hands or anything but like he was touching my leg while drawing on my jeans and i grabbed his arm a couple times, stuff like that nd idk maybe it doesnt sound like much but to me it was like everything — and yeah then we ended up going back to the city centre for his dad to pick us up which is when 2 things happened: 1, we were crossing at some traffic lights and he said smthn like “i feel so weird doing this i’m just following everyone else” or smthn along those lines and this random guy neither of us knew was like “dont follow the crowd. be confident” like dude??? 😭 do we know u??? (it was so fucking random) anyways 2, there was this street preacher yelling abt how “there will be 2 resurrections” and to “succumb to jesus” or whatever and i legit doubled over laughing when i realised what he was saying and i think he saw me but b r o literally how can someone do that w/o getting way too embarrassed i literally would not be able to make an announcement that ppl need to get out of here bcz danger incase they thought i was annoying or whatever literally how to they have such little embarrassment anyways sorry, side tangent over. (i’m almost done) and yeah his dad came and took us home and before i got out of the car when they got to my house he said thanks for hanging out with him and that it was rlly fun and I KNOW thats not much but idk just like the way he said it or the fact that he said that to me after that just <3333 and yeah idk sorry this was just like idek how many words of me gushing abt my crush and going on 30 side tangents but fuck you this is what u signed up for when u clicked “read more” so

oh my god so much happened today mutuals can i treat u like a diary for a minute

[multifandombullshitbabes]

TOP GUN HEADCANONS: Bob Floyd edition (he's my blorbo)

Gotta honor my icon for my first post here. I love bobby, hes my bby, my son, my silly rabbit.

Let's start:

HE'S TRANS. hes a transman, but he still likes to explore his gender identity trough clothes n shit. basically, I wanna see him in a dress

hes done top surgery, 2 horizontal scars below his pecs and his nipples are heart shaped. cuz i think thats cute

hes not particularly interested in bottom surgery, but he DOES have a glorious t-dick. my son is packin ;)

i also hc him as gay, or just HEAVILY men leaning. I get the pan and bi hcs, but for some reason i see him as a man lover only

he has an insomnia disorder and autism, possibly adhd. at this point, bob will just deal with his shit raw

he has a hyper fixation on the ocean. throughout his years in the navy, he was also doing a marine investigator course, very surface (hah) level of course, but he wanted it official

bob has a scuba diving certification (he ALMOST went full ocean instead of the navy. almost)

bob's family is not his biological one. they are his childhood next door neighbors, who stepped in when his family was um. having issues. I'll make another post for that I think

im just gonna say that bob's mom sucked ASS and his dad wasnt there as much because of divorce when he was 4. he also worked for the USA government, secret service, so their time was limited

he's an only child, but Sirah, the child of his neighbor family, was always a big sister to him. She figured out bob's gender identity since very young, and always helped him make small but meaningful steps to learn n accept it himself

bob is a great cook, but he does prefer when someone else cooks for him. he thinks its very sweet

bob is a supernatural skeptic. he believes more in cryptics and aliens than ghosts n demons

bob's fav animals are cats, sharks and jellyfish

bob is also very interested in space, but more because his dad was, and they would trade facts of each others hyper fixations whenever they could

his aim is IMMACULATE, scarily so. never anger bob if theres throwable or shootable objects nearby. you will be hit

the reason bob doesnt drink with the other daggers is because he has this irrational fear that somehow theyre gonna be called for a mission, theyre all gonna be drunk including him, and for some reason he'll be needed to pilot, even tho thats not his position, n then he'll crash n die somewhere. so he never drinks to ensure hes at least sober if something happens. he knows its irrational, the fear is still there tho

bob is like a disney princess, and will charm any animals that come in contact with him. even that bear that one time. and that shark while he was drunk. he will fight spiders however, verbally

he knows how to play the guitar, but he also wants to learn the drums

bob was on puberty blockers when he was around 14 and started testosterone when he turned 17. His top surgery was his 21st birthday present

everybody growing up always said he looked like his mother, which he hates considering she sucks. it wasnt until he met his grandmother from his father side when he turned 20, when she saw him for the first time since his dads funeral at 14, that she says what shes always thought: that he was the copy paste of his dad. he cried a lot that day

bobs father is actually missing. he went on a mission he knew could be dangerous, a long awaited one, so there were a few years to prepare for that. something about radiation and handling dangerous substances. bob knows this, and they spent as much time together as they can

bob actually named himself after his dad. they are both Robert Floyd. ppl normally think its either spongebob, or the minion, or bob the builder for some reason. one person said robert pattinson from twilight specifically. bob didnt know how to feel (hes team jacob)

That will do for now. cuz its getting long. I'll add of bobs backstory cuz BOY. ITS DARK. IM SORRY IN ADVANCE

[golbrocklovely]

Regardless of what you have to say or think of the old friend group, they were regular people in comparison to these new folk they hang around. All these newish people were Carrington’s friends and met Katrina in the clubhouse and since then they all became super cringey. Both Sam and Colby used to talk so much smack about influencers and fakeness and now here they are. Between Sam thinking he was “crowd surfing” during his bday, all the times he jumps on couches and tables now, Katrina mimicking every influencer girl out there, and Colby filming it all they changed and seem fake.

The content is still good which is what i watch but them as people are not the laid back people they once were and its not about growing up, i mean their circle changed into those types of people so they turned into those types of people.

if you want to argue that their newer friends aren't as "real" as their old ones, sure. i can see what you mean. personally, i don't think we know snc's newer friend group well enough to know whether or not they're real or fake. i mean, in some regard i would think they're more real than their old friends since they aren't pining to be in every video snc make or aren't constantly trying to film them any chance they get.

and i think we also gotta realize that snc and co are just showing a minor fraction of what their day/night is like. so sam showing himself jumping on a table isn't really what he's doing the whole time he's partying. that's just the highlight, so to speak.

and if we're gonna get technical, snc have always been crazy partiers. i even made a (non-complete) list.

things that snc have done that are far more crazier than what they do now:

grand theft autoed a car (their friend driving while also intoxicated) under the age to legally drive, went to walmart and stole fireworks and blew up a mailbox (almost also blowing up a friend's hand)

broke into an active jail (and that was them sober)

have had 200+ size parties at both of their houses

borderline trashed a hotel room in vegas for 25x25

drank only alcohol and then went on a hike in hawaii

both have gone to strip clubs together and with friends

have had the cops called on them bc of how crazier their parties were

colby HIMSELF could easily have his own list

admitted to the first thing listed above and said he was drunk at 15 in the backseat

did a livestream high with prettyheartbreak

partied in vegas when he turned 21

got banned from some night clubs with brennen bc they tried to fight ppl

has ALLEGEDLY done coke with mike

had fake ids and then got CAUGHT with them when he was arrested

has had multiple videos of him taken from friends of him drinking straight out of a liquor bottles

got drunk and pillow fought nate and made him get a nosebleed

got drunk, walked down the vegas strip, got chased after and kicked a cactus

did a boys trip with mike and kevin and a couple other guys and literally DRANK the whole time

has a whole drawer dedicated to weed in his bedroom

had a threesome with brennen

and if we talk about their old friend group, none of them were angels either. two of them were addicts, one's a pothead now, and one of them dabbled in enough substances. and the rest all partied hard with snc too. jake met tara bc of snc's parties. a lot of them met snc bc of the parties they would throw, so clearly they weren't all saints.

but there's nothing wrong with that. partying is normal, as long as you don't abuse it or your body by doing so. honestly, i think snc are a lot tamer now, which is better anyway.

can the content they make be annoying? sure. i won't deny that. but let's not pretend they are all of sudden falling off the deep end bc they go to the occasional rave or bc they like vegas now.

[fedonciadale]

Hi, I am new in asoiaf/GOT fandom. I had read the series yrs ago and watched the show few months back. I wanted to know why so many ppl hate Sansa in GOT? I have seen even ppl who claim Sansa as their favorite character in books hate her show version. If I had not watched Got, I would have thought they made Sansa the main villain in the television adaptation 😅

There are some differences between her characterization in both versions but then almost every adaptation of books into movies/TV series has never been exactly the same. Even many other characters in GOT are not exactly same as books. So I really dont get what Sansa has done in the show that ppl hate her so much. Bcs to me Sansa was one of the few good guys in the show. Probably the only one who actually proved herself as a capable ruler in the end. So watching the hatred for Sansa in TV adaptation after I joined the fandom has been shocking tbh.

Hi there!

I think there are several reasons, and I just give the bullet points. Sansa was never a very popular character. Go to any other fandom space but tumblr and you’ll only find a few people defending her. And even here: The amount of gifsets that have the Starks but leave out Sansa....

The reason for that are dudebros who only love ‘badass’ women or women who show their tits. It does taste a little bit of misogyny or at least anti feminine women. (and dudebros in that sense are not necessarily men)

People who hate Sansa in the books hate her in the show even more because she got agency in the show, and it became clear that she a) is important and b) would not be dead by the end.

What Sansa did in the show is a) she had screentime with Jon Snow in season 6 which riled up Jon€erys and J0nrya fans, b) the show made her fight with Jon and c) the BotB threw shade on her, because you could interpret it as if Sansa would have been o.k. with Jon dying (and that was never solved!)

In season 7 she was pitched against Arya, a fan favourite, and again people thought she would choose her ambition over her family.

In season 8 she was set up as a foil to Dany and people who had expected her to braid Dany’s hair were shocked when she did not do that and blamed her for Dany destroying King’s Landing (yes, they did!).

It did not help that D&D continued to suggest shady motivations for Sansa - which all turned out to be untrue, but were never explicitly denied. And the hints at her being a good ruler were put into a context were she was contrasted with Arya and Dany (fan favs). Therefore people did not take that seriously (her care for food, for all the refugees who needed to be admitted to Winterfell, her conviction that chopping of heads does not help etc.)

So, that is why Anti Sansas hated her even more in the show. In the books they can still delude themselves into thinking that she won’t be important.

Then there are the Sansabuts: They usually start their posts with “I love Sansa but” .... and then they proceed to tell everyone how unimportant she is. Usually these are people who stan Dany and desperately want them to get along and do not understand that GRRM set them up as foils. Sometimes these posts are disguised in the form of “I love bookSansa, but....” I side eye anyone who claims that Sansa won’t be that important in the books, to be honest. I might be a bit oversensitive in that regard, but the experience with Sansabuts is sobering. I once accidentally followed a strictly Book Sansa blog that hated on Sophie and continuously had edits with Sansa as Lady of x or y (anywhere but Winterfell).

To be quite honest to you. I myself think that D&D reduced some of the nicer traits of Sansa. They did change the characters. Tyrion is far too nice, Bran too cold and Sansa lost her kindness along the way. She still is a considerate ruler but the heartfelt kindness is not the same as in the books. And the one time she killed someone it was relatable (if not just, because there was no trial)

And they completely left out almost all of Sansa’s abilities : singing, knowing about just every noble house etc. The last time we saw her sewing was in season 6 I think. So, if pressed, I would probably tell you that I prefer BookSansa too. But that does not mean that I cannot recognize Sansa in the show. And I prefer her to any of the other characters. If by the end anyone is generally good, it is Sansa. Jon Snow is one of my favs, but season 7 and 8 has definitely soured my enthusiasm.

So, that is obviously my explanation.

TLDR; Sansa committed the crime of being a feminine woman and being important and not a trophy wife despite that. She also committed the crime that she came into the way of fan fav characters and especially Dany stans think it is Sansa who robbed them of an ending with Dany on the throne (when it was Dany herself), To outright haters she committed the crime of surviving and not dying a gruesome death.

I know she is really terrible, ;-)

Thanks for the ask!

[hottie0]

k so i had an idea for a chameron ao3 series of all the fics being conan gray songs but i got lazy and only wrote 1.5 stories for it so because i’m not acc gonna do it imma share the ideas i had cuz someone might find them useful so (btw these will be copied directly from notes the first time i wrote them, they can also be used for other ships if u want but i made them for chameron):

grow: a year after hs cam and charlie run into eachother in vermont and then u see a bunch of flashbacks of old nights and things at welton. they exchange numbers at the end or smth. (i did this one)

idle town: charlie can’t sleep at his new school. he reminisces and whatever. a little more focused on cam. he looks over at the other side of the room but cam isn’t there anymore. instead it’s his new roommate who he doesn’t even know the last name of. end it somehow.

generation why: pre-canon cam and charlie just talking on the roof. banter. romantics ensue on cams behalf. charlie doesn’t feel the same way. that’s why charlie treats him the way he does.

crush culture: charlie pining after cam. a bunch of little things cam does to push charlie over the edge. charlie talks to neil and neil says cam likes him too. he doesn’t. charlie kisses cam one night while studying and cam rejects him and they argue. this is the night of neils death. that’s why cam didn’t find out through charlie and everything hurt a little bit more than it should’ve.

greek god: cameron’s being made fun of all the time by charlie and he knows charlie likes him and idk tbh this one got deleted and idk what i had written

lookalike: pre-neils death cam and charlie dated in their time at welton then broke up which caused tension going into senior year. the dead poets knew. when the dps started charlie got a gf and wouldn’t stop talking about her. her name was elaine. he brought her to a meeting and she looks just like cam. damn.

the other side: falling out of love. the process.

the king: cameron accidentally reads a poem charlie had written for/about him. he stresses all day and acts weird. everyone else is like ??? at night cam decides f it and confronts him. it ends cute

comfort crowd: night time. tomorrow morning charlie was meant to leave welton so all his stuff was packed up. hed already punched cam so it was tense. to say the least. cam randomly gets up out of bed and charlie is like wtf?? cam fuddles around then he’s like “u coming” they go to the cave and have a meaningful talk and if they end up cuddling then that’s their business

wish you were sober: charlie and cameron get drunk in their dorm. cam can’t hold his alcohol well so he gets wayy more drunk. he tells charlie some personal shit. some of which includes the fact that he used to have feelings for charlie. charlie has feelings for cam. he’s sad and sends cam to bed.

maniac: short one. they’re at the same bar a few years later. not with eachother but cam knows charlie’s there. charlie is talking shit abt cam and calling him weird and blah blah. but just that night, charlie had called cam desperate after years. cam thinks abt everything. he gets up and leaves but doesn’t leave w/o saying a big ol’ f u to charlie. this ones so mean to charlie. sucks. anyways.

online love): they’re doing long distance because charlie got expelled. they break up over the phone. aw. make it depressing. maybe by them being interrupted before rly saying goodbye and shii.

checkmate: they’re playing chess idk i couldn’t think of anything better. just cute and fluffy cuz i say so.

the cut that always bleeds: cameron is in a problematic relationship w a girl he met at uni. they just went through one of their fight episodes. cam went back to his room but he needed company. he decides to go to charlie’s dorm for comfort. but they haven’t spoke since that evening years ago. charlie says “i thought i’d never see you again” yadda yadda cam tells charlie everything and they just hold eachother. the gf is like “plz take me back” so cam does and he never sees charlie ever again. cry abt it.

fight or flight: charlie has a gf but little does he know she’s cheating on him. he ends up catching her with her side piece in their apartment. it’s cameron. there’s a whole wtf moment and the gf is like “u two know eachother???”. cams like “i swear i didn’t know” the girl leaves but cam stays. they argue or whatever or just talk not sure yet. then they kiss and charlie says something dumb and it ends. also cameron is hot as shit in this btw.

affluenza: probs short. when charlie is getting ready to leave cam is like “so money can’t buy happiness” and charlie’s like tf did u say to me. they talk abt where charlie’s going and whatnot and money. “i can’t do the things you do charlie, don’t you get anything” charlie leaves feeling a bit more guilty.

(can we be friends?): cam and charlie’s life growing up together. cute moments of them falling for the other. “now charlie knows why he and cameron could never be friends.”

heather: charlie and knox are together. cameron likes charlie. one night charlie is drunk and it’s just cam and him in the dorm. charlie ends up kissing cameron as a joke and cameron doesn’t know. there’s a fic like this. after the kiss it’s never the same. knox doesn’t know what happened. cameron has to watch them be all buddy buddy and shit- even if they’re not out to the rest of the group, cam knows. cameron knows not to interfere with their relationship no matter how much he wants to. he chooses to sit and watch and keep all his feelings inside.

little league: charlie stops by a cafe one night because he has nothing else to do. it turns out it’s open mic night. someone gets up to read. that someone is cameron. cameron performs a poem called little league. charlie remembers things. he leaves before the poem is over. /OR/ Cameron is an adult, he's a doctor or smth bouj, he has a family, a house, the embodiment of the american middle aged straight white man dream life. But sometimes, in secret, he takes Welton's Yearbook out of the shelf, and he traces Charlie face, and he remembers.

the story: cameron and charlie are late-night swimming in the lake together. they’re fantasizing abt whatever and charlie says “we should run away” they continue the convo like they did the others. a few days later charlie brings it up again, seriously this time. “what? dalton are you on something?” no. they get into an argument and shit. about a week later cameron wakes up to charlie sneaking out, but this isn’t sneaking out like dps meeting sneaking out, he’s running away. cam: “charlie? what are you doing up?” charlie: “this is your last chance. you coming?” cam: *thinks* no.

fake: ratting on keating and more angsty mess

overdrive: first kiss moment. they’re meant to be studying but they got distracted and are just talking instead. charlie’s like “cam have u ever kissed sum1” cam: “i think u know the answer to that dalton” charlie: “do you want to” cam: “ha! that’s a laugh! who can i find within a mile of here that i could kiss” charlie: me. whole carpe diem whatever- “charlie are you kidding do you know what would happen if someone found out!?” “so i won’t let them” but they kiss and it’s cute

astronomy: au: cam never ratted out keating but neil still died but just that whole thing never happened. ok. ever since neil died both cam and char were different. their relationship was tense. before it had been perf and everyone was envious of them but after neil everything changed. cameron was more agressive and easily irritable. charlie was more reserved and quiet. they tried to fix it but they decided it would be best to split. they still saw eachother in hallways and stuff, but were no longer roommates. after a couple months, they were strangers.

people watching: a view on the cameron/charlie relationship from other people. they’re opposites obv. when ppl were first informed they were taken aback to say the least. but when they see how they are together they get it yk? yeah u do.

ur welcome for my genius guys u need it.

[ironmandeficiency]

cody, where’s my lightsaber?

pairing: obi-wan kenobi / reader

word count: 6575

summary: you decide to introduce your dear friend to the wonders of the cannabis plant while planetside. the outcome is peak humor for your troops.

warnings: you’re smoking weed with obi-wan in this, so obviously there’s drug use.

a/n: i got high af (for the first time in a while) and decided to write something of it. i wrote like 90% of this while high and was beginning to sober up at the end. i got the title inspo from the stoner movie “dude, where’s my car?” and it made me laugh way more than it would have if i were 100% sober

disclaimer!! if you know firsthand what cannabis does from your own use of it, this isn’t anything new. if cannabis is a new concept to you, don’t take this fic’s descriptions as gospel. this was how i was taught & experienced it, but there’s a chance something may be “wrong” according to some ppl. this is NOT telling you to smoke weed if it’s illegal where you are/if you’re not of age to do so!! i’m not condoning it!! this was just something i decided to write after getting/while high.

“where exactly are we going, y/n?” obi-wan was sounding a bit impatient. you’ve been guiding him through the busy streets of coruscant for nearly twenty minutes without so much as an explanation.

“we’re almost there, obi. just have a little patience.”

“you must be mistaking me for my former padawan, i have plenty of patience.”

“could’ve fooled me, anakin- ow! don’t push me, obi!”

“that’s better.”

“you’re a heathen, you know that?”

“you’re as much of one as i, darling.”

obi-wan smirked indignantly at you as he kept walking, a hand resting on your waist protectively. he didn’t trust these streets at all, no matter how calm you were about just traipsing through them like a daisy patch. he’s seen and felt many shady and downright malicious people here and wonders what business you would have in such a place.

he was jostled slightly when you pulled him out of his thoughts and into the doors of… a caf house? was this all you wanted, to go get coffee with him? kriff, he could’ve taken you to dex’s and saved you both so much trouble (except for the suggestive looks he’d receive from dex concerning you, but he got those from a lot of people these days).

“what are we-“

“stay here until i get back. don’t let anyone else see your face or we’re both screwed. your face is too widely known to not cause trouble for us both, and my reputation here can’t save us. understand?”

obi-wan nodded his agreement but was quite perplexed. why did this place matter so much to you? he couldn’t ask you at the moment because you had disappeared with a flourish of your cloak into a back room, followed by a rodian woman who seemed to be expecting you. he didn’t want to pry and use the force to investigate because he knew you would tell him in due time. he trusted you with his life, and that trust extended to when you were at a seedy caf shop in the middle of the coruscanti slums.

you untied the small pouch of credits from your belt, being cautious to hide your lightsaber from whoever could be watching the transaction. your friend did the same with the item you were looking for, emptying a pouch from a larger pouch.

you slowly rest the credits into her palm as she hands you the smaller pouch. you opened it and brought it to your nose, inhaling the scent to ensure it was what you were expecting from her. this batch was going to be the best you’ve had in a while, you could tell just by the scent of it.

“i hope this pleases you, my friend.”

“indeed it will, torin. pleasure doing business again. may the force be with you.” with that, you returned to where obi-wan was trying his best to be inconspicuous. he was doing quite well, considering his unfamiliarity with his surroundings.

you nudge obi-wan through the force, gesturing towards the exit. he got your hint and once at your side, his hand immediately gravitated to the small of your back. it was adorable that he was so protective of you, but you’ve been coming here since you were a padawan, sneaking out of the temple and making deals in the slums for one of the greatest plants in the galaxy. there wasn’t anything you needed to be protected from here.

cannabis is highly regulated throughout the core systems to the point where what little of it was legally sold was extremely weak, thus resulting in a high demand for stronger concentrations in the black market. it’d cost most beings an arm and a leg for the quality product you buy (flesh or mechanical, no one was picky these days), but you’ve had connections to some of the best sellers for over fifteen years, and your loyalty paid off. they’d save you the best of the best because they knew you could be trusted, and that you weren’t the kind to sell them out.

you could tell that obi was a bit anxious. he didn’t know what you did when you disappeared with your rodian friend, but he had a strong suspicion that it wasn’t completely legal. “i can feel your anxiety in the force, my dear. i will explain everything once we’re back on base. in the meantime, relax. we are okay.” you sent him more reassurance through your bond and didn’t stop until you could feel his tension begin to evaporate.

he pulled you closer still, using your body as an anchor in a situation he wasn’t completely at ease in. you let him because it reminded you of your first visit to the slums you were taken on with the older padawans. you were anxious back then and still had a strong fear of the council, but with time your fellow padawans helped ease that fear into respect with the help of a routine trip to a near-hidden caf shop.

your return to base was a tad eventful. your commander biggs, marked by the violet paint of the 89th battalion, had several holopads in hand, each of them open to documents your signature was direly needed on. you sighed, bidding obi-wan farewell and returning to the duties the title of general brought you.

it was far too long until you were able to rest. after getting dinner in the mess with your men, you sent thrash off to deliver a message to commander cody, and then him to obi-wan. you avoided using your comms as much as possible during leave, they felt too professional during times where you were free to relax. there was a high chance that you didn’t even need to use your friend’s commander as a middle man because wherever cody was, there was a large chance that you’d find the general there alongside him.

that seemed to be the case when you were in your quarters, mere minutes after sending the message with your trooper. “i’m glad to see you got my message. now come in, take a seat wherever.”

“is this about our little trip today? i’ve been quite curious as to what you brought back.” you grinned at his words, excited to show him your loot.

“well then, let me show you.” you grabbed the small pouch from where it rested on your bedside table and poured some of its contents into your cupped palm, holding it towards him.

his eyes widened considerably when he processed what you were holding. “y/n, is that-“

“cannabis, my friend. yes it is. some of the best in the galaxy, as a matter of fact. came from the outer rim where there’s no limit on the strength.” this seemed to shock him and you were quick to assure him that you didn’t get the hardcore stuff. “don’t worry, it’s not mixed with anything else. i only use it to relax sometimes, and this batch is somewhat mild for my taste. i have no desire for much else.”

obi-wan wasn’t sure what to expect, but it wasn’t this. he had many questions brewing in his mind and wasted no time asking them. “why did you have me accompany you?”

“to show them you were trustworthy, in case you ever wanted to get some on your own. now you know where to find it.”

“why is your trust so valuable to them?”

“i’ve been a customer of theirs for a long time. in the beginning, i was the extra face that accompanied the older kids until they stopped going or started buying from someone else. eventually i became a solo customer and stayed loyal to them. they value and reward loyalty in their business, which is why i always get a good price.”

he took a moment to contemplate this. he was flattered to have been chosen to accompany you. one more question sprang into his head despite being unsure as to where it came from, and he spoke it with no qualms. “are you going to share?”

--------

when you had asked him whether he preferred a joint, blunt, pipe, or edible, he had a dazed look in his eye similar to when shinies see a jedi fight for the first time. you didn’t want him to feel awkward about not knowing what to do, so you decided to teach him what each method did, how long it took to take hold, etc.

as it turns out, obi-wan has never smoked cannabis in his life. 

he asked what the best thing was for a beginner, and you immediately began to roll a joint for the two of you to share. you chatted as you worked, your fingers going through the familiar motions with little thought.

your pipes had screens in them, but you didn’t want to risk obi-wan exhaling into the pipe and blowing charred chunks everywhere. edibles were a peculiar beast, since it takes longer for their effects to set in and can sometimes hit harder than a joint of the same concentration. the first time you had an edible several years ago you ate the whole thing, not knowing that the effects would be delayed compared to smoking. needless to say, you kept away from edibles for a long time after that and became finicky about them.

once the joint was made, you examined your handiwork with a smile. “this is a joint. you take the cannabis and wrap it in a special kind of paper, making sure to seal it shut so nothing falls out. then,” you searched a drawer and found your lucky lighter, flicking it on and bringing the flame to the joint resting lazily between your lips.

“you light it like so.” obi-wan watched you attentively, admiring the expert with which you took a hit off the joint, inhaling the smoke for a moment before blowing it away from you both.

“you slowly inhale from here,” you pointed to the end you didn’t light, “let the smoke stay in your lungs for a few seconds, the smoke is what gives you the feeling we’re looking for. and for future reference,” you took another hit before continuing, mildly enjoying the way obi-wan was watching your lips wrap around the joint. “never blow your smoke towards someone unless they explicitly ask you to. it’s a somewhat common practice, but i don’t enjoy it and i don’t think you would either.”

you held the joint outward to him, silently asking if he’d be comfortable with trying it right then before remembering something else he needed to know. “there’s a high chance that you’re going to cough a bit after your first couple hits. your body’s going to be unused to this, so be gentle with it. don’t expect to handle your first joint like a longtime smoker would.” you retrieved a water bottle from your small refrigerator in the kitchenette, setting it down beside him.

he took the joint from your hands, mimicking the way you held it to not look like a fool and slowly brought it to his lips. “remember, don’t let the smoke out too early or it’ll be like wasting the joint itself. since you’re new to this, try inhaling for three seconds, holding it in and counting to four before exhaling. does that make sense?”

obi-wan nodded slowly, his eyes studying the joint resting between his fingers. “if you don’t want to do this right now obi-wan, please don’t think you have to. i don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“i know you wouldn’t pressure me into doing anything, y/n. i just never thought i’d be doing this, it’s a bit of a shock to me.”

you nodded, relieved to hear that you weren’t making him uncomfortable. “that’s completely understandable. but before you do this, i want you to know that cannabis can have a subtle effect on your control of the force.” this was where your concern held the most weight. it was stressed to you a lot when you were first experimenting with cannabis as a padawan, that you wouldn’t have as firm of a grip on the force as you did when sober. you had no idea how this would make obi-wan feel or what would happen when he relaxed his grip on the force.

“there have been times where i don’t realize i’m using the force on something until it’s pointed out to me that something’s floating that normally doesn’t. don’t be alarmed, it’s okay. i’ll be here the entire time to help you.”

obi-wan took a deep breath, letting this information sink in. he seemed to be having a debate with himself last-minute, trying to choose whether this was worth temporarily losing some of his grip on the force. he came to his decision after a moment, the determination set in his jaw almost adorable because it was about cannabis of all things. his eyes flitted to yours as he brought the joint to his lips, following your directions exactly. he inhaled to the count of three and held the smoke in for a precise four seconds before blowing it out.

“you did that perfectly, my friend. now here’s the last rule of smoking cannabis with someone: it’s puff, puff, and pass. you take two hits and give it away, then it’s the other person’s turn to do the same.” his reply came through another hit that he once again held for four seconds, blowing it out with a smile.

he passed it back to you with a light cough that eventually grew a bit too much for his liking. he looked a bit frazzled as he coughed, unsure whether this was normal. you sent him waves of calm through the force as you snatched the water bottle from where it lay, opening it for him in a hurry before extending it toward him. he accepted it gratefully and was barely pacing himself while drinking it, only doing so at your request.

“this is okay, don’t worry. you’re okay, obi. everything is okay.” you placed a hand on his back to remind him of your presence, that you weren’t going to leave his side. he leaned into your touch, letting himself relax in your now outstretched arms.

you took two more hits before letting it rest in the ashtray you kept on your bedside table. obi-wan’s eyes were on the joint you let rest after putting out, wondering why you didn’t pass it back to him. “since this is your first time and we have no idea what’s going to happen, we should take it slow. this concentration is stronger than what i had started on, and the effects it had on me were intense then. i can only imagine how the next several hours for you are going to go before they actually happen, and i don’t want you to do more than you can handle.”

“oh, that makes sense. thank you for looking out for me.”

“of course, obi. now do you want to grab some snacks from the mess and come back in here for a while before it hits you completely?”

“yeah, that sounds like a good idea.”

biggs was minding his own business in the mess when it happened. he was eating his dinner, talking to his vod’e, just taking advantage of being on leave like everyone else does. everything was ordinary & nothing was out of place, and he relished in that. the 212th and 89th battalions mingled among each other pleasantly like always. nothing could go wrong here.

“did you see that holo of kix tackling fives after he- hey, uh, biggs?” waxer’s voice cut off abruptly mid-sentence, eyes too busy staring at the roll levitating off his vod’s tray. “what’s wrong with your roll?”

when more brothers spotted the roll, the ones that were eating theirs quickly set them down. exclamations of shock and a large variety of curses were spun by nearly every man there, none of them having any idea what was going on or why their food suddenly started to float. soon enough, there were all different pieces of their dinner floating around the mess, some snatching their food back after watching the spectacle for a moment.

biggs knew what this meant. he knew exactly what was going on. “oh, no.”

“biggs, do you know what’s going on?”

“is biggs home in there? hello?” boil lightly knocked on his ori’vod’s temple until the hand was swatted away.

“tell us, biggs!”

“yeah, don’t leave us out of the loop!”

before biggs could answer the questions his brothers were throwing at him, his eyes found you hand-in-hand with general kenobi. he could see the grins plastered on your faces from halfway across the mess and he froze. was general kenobi high right along with you?

no, he couldn’t be… could he?

his question was answered by the food floating even higher when the two of you passed tables. he knew that when you were high, you had built up your ability to somewhat control the force through your haze. but with general kenobi (he still couldn’t believe general kenobi was high), it was quite obviously his first time under the influence. he ignored the questions as he watched the jetti like a hawk, your movements much less calculated and a lot more fluid and loose.

you were the one that noticed the state of the food first, stopping and nudging general kenobi and gesturing at the mess. you were giggling about it, and it was all you could do to keep the general standing as he began to laugh hysterically, finger pointing at a stray bantha steak a member of the 212th was chasing haphazardly.

“obi! obi, sshh! our men are watching, you gotta- pfft!” it was hard to keep your calm at one of the most composed men in the galaxy happily losing his shit. “obi-wan, stay calm! we gotta get our food without drawing too much attention!”

“but look at the food! it’s floating! they have no idea what to do about it!”

obi-wan started giggling like a child instead of full-on cackling, only doing a mildly better job at keeping the attention away from you both. this was completely his doing, no doubt. you turned on your holo and began to record the chaos erupting in the mess with the giggling jedi master leaning on you for support.

somehow you were able to get some food and leave the mess before it hit obi-wan too hard, you using the force to carry the trays in front of you both. when you left the mess, you heard a cacophony of thuds and splat’s echo into the hall. hey, at least the food wasn’t floating anymore.

you were helping obi-wan pace himself with his food because you knew that he’d throw it all back up if he ate too fast. he didn’t seem to understand why you were doing this, pouting when you would block his plate from him. it took a lot of strength to keep from laughing in his face but you held through with a face-numbing smile.

your comm beeped loudly, taking your attention briefly away from obi-wan.

“general-”

“biggs, we’re on leave. don’t use titles here.”

“sorry si- y/n. i’m also not going to ask for permission to speak freely because we’re on leave?” biggs ended this with a question, still unused to being so informal with those in authority.

“exactly! you’re learning quick, my friend. what can i do for ya?”

biggs sighed much like an exasperated parent before speaking. “did you get general kenobi high?”

you knew this was coming after the scene in the mess, there was no way to avoid it. but the way he said it, the incredulous tone your commander spoke with, it sent you into another fit of laughter. you nodded and laughed, not really processing the fact that biggs couldn’t see you nod because this wasn’t a holocall. he took your laughing as a confirmation of his suspicions and so did the brothers sitting beside him.

“hey y/n, do you think i could cut my bantha steak with my lightsaber?” obi-wan’s voice crackled through the commlink and nothing could have explained the unfamiliar looseness of his cadence to the men better than him being higher than the negotiator, which was exactly the case. “wait, could i cook a bantha steak with my lightsaber?”

you ignored the comm for a moment to answer obi-wan with a grin. “if you were patient enough when holding your ‘saber over the raw steak, maybe so. but if you cut your cooked steak with it, it’ll just char it beyond edibility and ruin a perfectly good steak.”

obi-wan paused to contemplate your answer, running through the scenarios in his head before being okay with your response.

“pardon?”

“sorry about that. obi-wan was just curious about the culinary abilities of his lightsaber, no worries.”

you could hear the laughter from the other side of the link and you were mildly curious about who was listening to your conversation. “who’s there with you, biggs?”

“waxer, boil, venom, cody, and myself. no one else.”

“y/n, am i swaying? i feel like i am but i’m not sure if it’s me or you.”

“okay, that’s good. just keep this between you guys and it���ll be fine. and no one is swaying, i promise.” you knew obi-wan would be mortified if the entirety of your battalions heard of this, but these five were loyal and wouldn’t speak of this outside of themselves.

“how’s the general taking it?” you picked cody’s voice out and you smiled at the concern he had for obi-wan. it was laced with humorous curiosity but you could tell he was a tad quite protective.

before you could answer, obi-wan chose to answer in a voice a smidge too loud. “hello, cody! i’m doing very well, but thank you for your concern!”

more snickering came from the comms, the five men enthralled with this new side of obi-wan. you had no clue why you didn’t invite the man to smoke with you earlier because high obi-wan was honestly the best source of entertainment you’ve had in a long time.

“biggs said that you two were the reason the food went awol in the mess earlier but didn’t explain why.” boil’s curious voice came through and you smiled at the reminder of what the men now dubbed the Floating Food Fiasco.

“cannabis has a tendency to weaken our control over the force. it’s normal for things to randomly float when a jedi’s under the influence because of that. like with the food, that was all obi-wan’s doing.”

“wait, i was the one moving the food?”

“yes dear, it was all you. now stop eating so fast. your stomach won’t be happy with you later if you keep on like that.”

obi-wan nodded as if he understood but didn’t slow down, prompting you to move his plate out of his reach. he humphed and leaned back, almost slumping in the chair. you did not want him throwing up on your watch. “y/n, is it normal to feel as though my bones are vibrating?”

this was the time to cut the conversation short. “well boys, it was good to talk to you but i’ve got to look after our dear general. contact me directly if either of us are needed, obi-wan’s clearly in no state to answer his comms.”

“will do, general.”

biggs ended the call, freeing your attention that was almost instantly caught by obi-wan reaching for his lightsaber. that wouldn’t turn out well at all. you quickly used the force to bring his lightsaber to your open hand, quickly connecting it to the extra loop on your belt. “return my lightsaber, y/n! i need to test your hypothesis about the steak!”

you sighed as you could feel him trying to get it back with the force but failing at his attempt, his lightsaber gently tapping against your thigh as it moved. “obi, you’re about to get hit really hard. it’s my responsibility to keep you from doing stupid things while high, and this is one of those things.”

obi-wan stood from his seat and was clearly having trouble standing on his own, if his leaning against the back of the chair was any indication. you got up and slowly guided him to your bed, laying him down gently. he seemed perturbed that he had to be guided there, mere feet from his former spot. it was hard for him to hide the slight panic upon realizing that he, in fact, could not stand on his own and you picked up on it.

“obi, i know you’re a little scared right now. this is something you’ve never felt and your body is telling you to lash out. but listen to me, everything is okay. i’m right here, obi, and i’m not leaving you. not now, not ever.”

he seemed to be soothed by your voice, so you kept talking as you helped him get a bit more comfortable. his boots were the first thing to come off, followed by his socks and the top layer of robes. you left his pants be but removed his shirt, softly telling him when to lift his arms and torso.

as you talked, you pressed a code into your comms to tell biggs to come to your quarters. since you didn’t know how long obi-wan was going to be in this panicked state or what he could do, you thought it best to have your commanders hold on to your lightsabers for now. biggs already had a loop for yours, and you knew for a fact that obi-wan dropped his ‘saber so many times that cody, the one who seems to always find it laying about, had been given one a long time ago.

it didn’t take long for biggs to arrive and take his leave, lightsabers in hand and holster as he left. you could feel his worry radiating off his force signature and you quickly chased it away, telling him that obi-wan was just crashing and that you weren’t going to leave his side. he seemed okay with this, leaving the room without another word.

obi hadn’t noticed the handoff through his resurfacing panic and you quickly got to work on reinforcing his mental shields, the only gap being where you sent him calm and peace. “why can’t i control my body? is this normal?” his voice was even quivering, a slight stutter beginning to form.

“this is normal for your first time, you’re okay. i’m right here with you, i’ll keep us safe. just take some deep breaths and focus on my voice, okay? you’re good, i’m not going anywhere.”

you were perched on the edge of the bed close to his head, your fingers carding through his peachy copper hair. whatever hair product he used was working wonders on his hair, it’s softness was unrivaled by anyone you knew. the ministrations seemed to calm him so that’s what you did, not letting yourself change the pattern as he occasionally pushed against your hand like a tooka. it was precious.

it took a little while, but obi-wan was on the edge of sleep and far more relaxed than he had been earlier. you were getting up when his hand grabbed for yours, tugging with what little energy he had. “i’ve just got to use the fresher, i'll only be a few feet away.” he huffed but let your hand go, clearly counting the seconds for you to get back.

you hurried as fast as you were capable of, finishing in record time because you knew obi-wan was still frazzled by this experience. “see? almost no time at all.” you returned to your spot and he grumbled something you didn’t completely understand. you looked at him in confusion until he spoke a little clearer. ah, he was asking you to hold him. yep, he’s a tooka in disguise.

you had no issue with this, knowing that some wanted physical affection/reassurance when their high hits them hard. you were among this group but it wasn’t a necessity for you like it was for other people. biggs had done this for you a few times, his presence so stable and comforting that it never took long for you to be asleep after an especially strong high.

parting the covers slightly, you got under them and pulled them over the jedi beside you. “see, obi? i’m not going anywhere. just relax, let yourself ride the high. i’ll be here the entire time. don’t worry, i’m here.” obi-wan wriggled himself into your arms and you wrapped them around him protectively, telling him through the force and with your words that you would keep him safe.

he seemed comforted by this thought and the feeling was increased tenfold by being so close to you, him glad to have someone to hold on to when he didn’t have complete control over his body. there were very few people he’d trust to protect him when he couldn’t do it himself, and he could fit the list on one hand; you, anakin, cody (and the entire 212th by proxy but that didn’t count right now), and more recently, ahsoka.

with thoughts of his loved ones in his head, he let himself relax in the haze and fall into a deep sleep unlike anything he’s had.

obi-wan came to and nearly panicked when he didn’t recognize his surroundings as his own quarters. not only did that shock him, but his body was… spasming? or were those just his bones vibrating? wait… bones weren’t supposed to do that.

he thrashed in the bed until his eyes barely caught the ashtray on the bedside table, and the events of the previous day nearly punched him in the face. he smoked cannabis! scratch that, he smoked cannabis with you! that somewhat explained the vibrating bones sensation and the way his consciousness felt like it was swimming through his head. these were your quarters, and he was sleeping in your bed.

the golden question was where you were.

his anxiety about being alone in your room spiked when he couldn’t reach out through the force to find you, his grip still too lax. obi-wan knew he had to leave at some point. if someone found him in your bed -and apparently shirtless- there would be many conclusions drawn, and there were some that could get you both in serious trouble with the council/senate (the line between the two was quite blurred these days).

he snapped himself out of his thoughts, resolving to get dressed and leave before anything bad could happen. sitting up was relatively easy if he did it slow enough, but standing? whole other game in itself. more than once he was leaning on various pieces of furniture while trying to dress himself. he was clearly still high, but it was nowhere near as strong as it was hours earlier. he continued to struggle (and trip over his feet more than once) with his robes and was relieved when given an excuse to sit down, his boots being the only thing reasonable to sit down and put on.

he gave the room a simple once-over and decided that it was fine how it was. your dinner trays from yesterday were gone and his lightsaber was-

oh, no.

“haar'chak!” obi-wan exclaimed. his lightsaber was lost in your room and he was barely able to support his own body weight, let alone do a frenzied deep search for his weapon! he realized that he had to find you before anyone else found him. you were the only one with him last night, and he guessed that you were also the only one that knew of his current state. and since he couldn’t find you with the force, he had to search for you the old-fashioned way: recon.

this wasn’t going to end well.

your comm beeped hours after getting obi-wan to sleep and you panicked for a moment, hoping to the force that he didn’t wake up. you tapped a code that told the other line to hold on a moment, and you slowly untangled yourself from obi-wan. stepping into the hallway, you quietly asked what the purpose of the comm was.

“general skywalker and commander tano have returned with the 501st, and the 104th have left. skywalker is asking for general kenobi and seems intent on finding him immediately. we’re in the hangar at the moment, but possibly not for long.”

you sighed because you knew something was going to go wrong. obi-wan can’t be sent to the field in the state he’s in, and he very well can’t tell the council the reason he can’t fight at the moment. before you could reply, anakin’s voice cracked through the link.

“y/n, your commander is clearly withholding information-”

“under my orders. thank you biggs, i will be there directly. in the meantime, please stay where you are.”

“yes, general.”

the link died and you rushed to the hangar, hoping that anakin wasn’t causing too much of a ruckus among your men.

he found you before you found him, the knight charging toward you with such speed that his robes were catching wind. he was extremely worried, his face taut with thinly-concealed distress.

“anakin, listen to me. you must take a moment to-”

“do not tell me what i must do! i haven’t been able to reach obi-wan through the force for hours! and then when i arrived to check on him at the last place he was known to be, your men blatantly lie to me! give me one reason why i shouldn’t worry!”

ahsoka’s distress paired with anakin’s fear/anger was nearly choking you through the force and you hoped that obi-wan was still asleep so he didn’t have to feel it. after sending safety to obi-wan and comfort to the padawan in front of you, you told them the truth.

“obi-wan smoked cannabis with me last night. that’s why his connection to the force was a bit off.”

“wait, he what?!”

“what’s cannabis?”

you and anakin both gave ahsoka an incredulous look, not believing that she didn't even know what cannabis was. then again, she hasn’t had the chance to spend much time in the temple and has spent even less time with fellow padawans that knew about the slums’ caf shop. you could let it slide. “it’s a popular recreational drug that i like to use occasionally. it doesn’t do anything bad, just relaxes you a bit. but for jedi, it can also weaken your control over the force which explains why obi-wan couldn’t contact you or receive your messages.”

“but obi-wan smoking cannabis? i don’t believe it for a second.” anakin’s tone was still bristly, which was to be expected. he was fiercely protective over his loved ones, and you didn’t need the force to tell you the intensity his emotions burned with.

your commander, unfortunately, took his words as a challenge. why he did, you had no idea. “with all due respect, general skywalker, are you calling her a liar?”

“biggs, stand down.” your commander stepped backward in shock at the harshness of your tone, his head downcast after the berating. you never used that tone with any of the men under your command and you regretted it almost immediately. you sent him an apology and he seemed to lighten up for a moment, so your attention turned to anakin.

“what would i gain from lying to you? if something bad actually happened to him, do you think that any member of the 212th would let me walk around here a free woman?”

“she has a point, master.”

“i also have footage from last night,” you raised your eyebrows toward ahsoka with a grin, thankful that her anxiety has died down. “wanna watch?”

obi-wan was sneaking around the base as well as expected. there were several close calls, and he knew that whoever was watching the security cameras would be plenty entertained. he paused for a moment, using the wall as a support before trying to use the force again, and this time it slightly worked. he was able to discern that he was going the completely wrong way if he wanted to find you. he didn’t have an exact location, but was able to get the general direction.

he was in the midst of pushing himself off the wall when he felt two more familiar signatures: anakin and ahsoka were nearby and anakin felt pissed. almost as quickly as he sensed his former padawan’s anger it dissipated into confusion, soon followed by humorous. okay, anakin was fine. it was time to get off this wall… or not.

he had pushed himself too hard through the force and collapsed onto the floor in exhaustion. obi-wan was conflicted: he could hope for no one to find him and wait until he was able to stand on his own before continuing his search; or he could hope for someone, anyone to find him, and live with the embarrassment of being so dependent and hope they didn’t take him to the medbay.

groaning when his head hits the wall, he tries one more time to get up (spoiler, he fails). he’s now regretting leaving your quarters because at least there, he had privacy when he was weak. he closed his eyes, resigned to nap where he sat but of course, footsteps pounding on the durasteel floors kept him from being able to do that. then the cannabis decided to show back up (in the good way), and the steady thrum of his bones vibrating brought a strange sense of calm back. he’d be fine if he just stayed here.

after showing anakin that yes, obi-wan was okay, you commed cody and told him to retrieve the general himself from your quarters and to bring him to the mess. when he got there and saw that obi-wan was gone, he immediately contacted glitch and scanner in the security department. they told him the direction the general went in, and he was off.

it felt like a lifetime before cody found his general slumped against the wall, a small smile on his face. cody could tell the general was breathing and all, but it just felt weird seeing him in this state.

“general! are you okay?”

“i’m, ah, quite well, thank you cody.”

“can you stand?”

“last i checked, no. and since then, my bones have decided to try and escape my body without consent, so i’m going to safely assume that i can’t.”

cody schooled his features because he was dangerously close to laughing in the general’s face at the way he stuttered through his words that still seemed to be semi-formal. “alright, i’m gonna take you to the mess. general y/l/n is looking for you.” the commander bent down and gingerly began to lift obi-wan, letting the jedi rest all of his weight on him.

“wait,” obi-wan instructed, cody going rigid on command. “what if i make the food float again?”

“we’ll cross that bridge when we get there, general. but for now, just focus on me. if you do the food thing again, i’ll be sure to record it for you.”

obi-wan seemed satisfied with this answer, then remembered the reason he left in the first place. “cody,” he mumbled, “where’s my lightsaber?”

[shhhlikeme]

Nin’s Matchup!

(SFW + NSFW)

Matchup Profile: Sfw+nsfw matchup pretty pls! (1/5) Name: Nin>Female>5’4>Film & sfx/theatrical makeup freelancer>V athletic in MS-HS: ballet, was in volley ball, soccer &Basketball teams>Miss my prime days>Scared to start workout again b/c I’ll get lightheaded>If sum1 helps push me through initial fear, I’ll keep growing from there> Likes chilling in ballet stretch poses>paints, photographs&draws as hobby>draws a pic a day (mostly portraits)>writing a comic atm >Always plan contingencies.🦄

(2/5) >embarrassed of my loud laugh(it’s like Kuroo’s)>introvert>not afraid to lead a team tho> V shy & quiet most times>8/10 times, feels awk in public,like idk what i’m saying, but others told me I seem social>Once I’m comfy w/ u, i joke a lot(occasional mum jokes 2 annoy+Sassy dirty ones w/ S/O)>hides behind ppl who likes 2 talk, but not when they’re 2 loud>laughs @ mistakes/when embarrassed>Will stop mistreatment, even if I get in trouble>values communication&genuine discussions🦄

(3/5) Sings when home alone>competes @ Street Fighter tournaments, trains everyday 4 it>Sings “Hit Me W/ Your Best Shot” when fighting bosses in game&swears melodically when i lose>eats chips w/ chopsticks >make hats out of my cat fur when bored>Workahokic night🦉>likes 2 teach >full convos w/ my 🐱>LIVES in oversized hoodies & flip flops, regardless of weather>no pants@home!>Feels incompetent sometimes, but keep practicing 2 improve>Analytical fast learner>idk why ppl think i look innocent🦄

(4/5)>Forgets 2 speak eng when tired (Thai 1st lang.)>Headrubs 4 s/o every night b4 bed>will miss u but is bad@texting>yelps like puppy when I’m surprised>Unconventionally resourceful: Wire hangers’s fixes everything! >stress bakes & will gets pouty if it didn’t turn out well.>overwhelmed to water my 50+ 🌱 >Doodles on smt (always have a pen on me)when i feel socially anxious> 2 dance sober @ clubs> Wants a stable relationship where we work tgt like a team to bring out the best in one another🦄

(5/5) I like a s/o who is lovable, kind, genuine, mature, independent and caring, but can also joke & be silly with like best friends. NSFW: open 2 try new things>❤️restraints, blindfolds & sensual tickle sex (as lee+ler) but had always been too shy to share it with any1>occasionally self conscious of food baby+stretchmarks>🥰edging/teasing >has a thing 4 height differences (likes to feel smol lol!) & primal play.>Is a switch. I’m so sorry if it’s too much info! Thank you for doing this!🦄

————————————

A/N: HI LOVE @crushzone !!!! I SMILE WHEN I SEE YOU IN MY NOTIFS GIRL I WORKED HARD ON YOURS OF COURSE💖 But no matter whaaaat I’m going to be very authentic in my matchups bc they’re based on compatibility and therefore, without further ado, lemme introduce you to your NEW BAE:

————————————

KŌTARŌ BOKUTO 🦉

SFW:

so you’re a theatrical makeup artist.

Aight.

Mind if I offer you a word of advice? :

RUN

“DUDE THAT’S AMAZING IT LOOKS SO SICK!”

Startled by someone’s loud booming voice, you smudged the eyeliner you were applying to your actor’s face all over their forehead. Whipping around to see who had disrupted your work you were faced with a beautiful black and grey haired owl. A rather tall... and very attractive ‘beautiful black and grey haired owl.’

He started walking around the dressing room like he owned the place, touching everything.

“Excuse me, you don’t have a badge. You can’t be backstage—!”

“Pretty obvious don’t you think, Miss ________?”

You didn’t take his bait, refusing to give this stranger your name. Bokuto shrugged.

“Well since I don’t know your name I shall label thee—Miss HOT GIRL of the 9 Kingdoms!” He nudged the knight actor who was sitting in your makeup chair with his elbow. “Did I sound 15th century ish or what??” The owl turned to you expecting to be praised. “I had to meet the person who made the medieval vampire look so scary in the last act. But that guy with the lights didn’t tell me anything about you being so hot.”

You were speechless because he was hot too

But he shouldn’t be back here so you tried to shoo him out anyway

He allowed you to try to shove him out but he was way bigger than you so nice try sis

When he yawned while you panted because you weren’t able to budge him an inch....

Bokuto wagered that he would leave if you agreed to make him look like the Hulk with your makeup skills for a Halloween party he had to go to

You didn’t really want to because you were a professional and you had no idea who this owl was but because you had 15 minutes until the second act and you needed peace and quiet if you were going to finish your job!!! ....

( This boy was not peace NOR quiet )

You agreed.... but because you answered so fast Bokuto kicked it up one notch

Prince of pushing his luck (king is reserved for Shōyo‘s extra ass)

He pretended to allow you to push him out of the makeup room a few steps but before you closed the door he stuck his foot between the door so it couldn’t close.

Smiling, he peered back in, looking down at you:

“AND...... you have to agree to go on a date with me. Tomorrow night?”

“Ugh FINE!”

Bo removed his foot and let himself out with a bounce in his step.

SERIOUSLY WHO LET THIS MAN BACKSTAGE......

Needless to say, after a few dates, mans won you over like he wins EVERYONE over

It surprised you how comfortable you became with him but he just has that affect on people

***

In terms of your athletic relationship Bokuto does many things:

He pushes you to go to the gym with him for one

He signs the two of you up for impromptu Beginner 30-day challenges that you both must stick to

So every morning for 30-days straight he jumps on you in bed to wake you up:

“NIN BABY TIME TO HIT THE GYM. BABY NIN TIME TO GET IN SOME SEXY GYM SHORTS. MON BÉBÉ NIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNN—“

“Kōtarō, please shut up.”

he doesn’t

He drags you there and eventually you get back into the swing of things.. killing it in the weight room with your supportive man cheering on your every rep!

You don’t even need him to wake you up during the second challenge!

Your volleyball player boyfriend also signs you up (without permission) for the neighborhood soccer team that Akaashi’s girlfriend is already on

You hated it at first because it was uncomfortable going back after not playing for so long but you soon realized that all the girls there were ex-athletes too and not stars

You formed amazing new girl friendships (especially with Akaashi’s gf) and double dates with them were one of your favourite nights of the week!

You owed that happiness in your life all to your Owl 🦉🥰

He and Akaashi came to every soccer game y’all had and you and the three of you went to all of Bokuto’s games, obviously

Btw you all were FITTTTTT OML

***

In addition...

You already know that your man finds your artistic talents insanely fascinating

On your first anniversary together Bokuto gifted you with a new paint set and new French stand:

Because he admires you Bokuto also tries to draw and paint seriously just like you

You stand over his shoulder and give him corrections and baby owl learns so fast it’s amazing

You two make ‘paint night’ a thing when you move in together and it’s always the most fun event!!!!

Bokuto CONSTANTLY and I mean CONSTANTLY asks for you to add him to the comic you’re writing but you say no because he wouldn’t fit in

He sulks but one day you surprise him by showing him that you drew a cute soaring black and gray owl in the background of almost every outdoor scene in your comic,

you pointed out that it was him

BOKUTOOOO WAS SOOOOO HAPPY

HE WAS SHOUTING FROM THE ROOFTOPS

He called Akaashi right away and almost cried tears of joy hahahahaha

***

Your contingent based lifestyle has saved your reckless boyfriend’s life and career many-a-times

It’s one of the things he loves most about you.

Also, it is important to mention that he is in LOVE with your laugh

Bby owl does anything to hear it and showers your face with kisses when you laugh to draw it out

He loves you so freaking much

When you don’t make sense and speak gibberish in public because your awkward side randomly comes out......your boyfriend loves to make fun of you:

“Huh? Nin, that wasn’t Japanese, that wasn’t Thai and that definitely wasn’t English. What planet is my adorable baby girl from, again? And how do I return her in exchange for a floating space car instead?!”

suh cute

All of Bokuto’s teammates really like you because you work in conjunction with Akaashi which means you actually have the magic ability to get Bokuto out of emo mode even faster than his best friend 🤯🤯🤯

When he’s at an away game in emo mode his teammates will literally FaceTime you and point their phone in his general direction

“Hey, Kōtarō!!!! Look, Nin’s on the phoneeee!”

Bby owl turns around slowly when he was sulking in the corner and when he sees you on the screen he’s running and jumping on whoever is holding your phone.”

“Kōtarō baby. You’re going to stop this emo mode right now. If not I won’t let you paint me nude like we discussed.”

mans was like: 😨😨😨😨🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗

YEP the next second you see him hitting his best practice spikes and his teammate thanks you profusely

You do this several times until Kōtarō just knows to not go into emo mode anymore because you won’t be happy

A year into his professional volleyball career The Black Jackal’s coach sent a surprise fruit bouquet to your work one time:

With a note that read:

To Nin,

Thanks.

Thanks a lot.

Love,

The Team

***

I know you don’t really like people who are considered “too loud” and Bokuto is like...... “MEGA LOUD 🎙 “ but you and Akaashi work together to quiet your boy down as he gets older

He’s perfect

And you love him

***

OKAY THIS IS THE FUNNIEST day THING:

You know how you like standing up for people (even strangers) and stuff?

Well one day, you and Bokuto get caught on a show called WHAT WOULD YOU DO?

Where the two of you cussed out this cat-abusing actor on the show in a convincing scenario!

It was PRICELESS

Bokuto literally tells everyone that y’all are movie stars because of it 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

***

More in the relationship:

Bo is always singing with you 💞 when y’all make breakfast it becomes a national sport to sing at the top of your lungs!!

And when he sees you eat chips with chopsticks he’s pulling a Hinata “🤩🤩🤩” face .

He begs you to teach him how

So you try

......and try

..................and try

He can’t do it bruv 😞

You see bby Owl’s emo mode return for the first time in like a year when the chip shatters between his sticks again

This time, you have to enlist Akaashi as the FaceTime saviour and Keiji just tells him:

“Bokuto. You should prefer eating chips with your hands anyway. It gets to your mouth faster.”

cue Bo’s 🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩🤩 face

........And all is well again

There’s more:

So you’re a workaholic?

Bokuto is fine with that. He just makes you promise that he gets to take you out on your lunch breaks a few times a week or whenever he can

He’s so sweet and your coworkers are BIG jealous of your relationship

Your man BEGSSSSS you to teach him Thai but you find it too hard so when he’s travelling on a long flight he spends the time learning the language on YouTube (and actually get decent at it) so that he can understand you when you’re sleepy😴🥺💕

When Bokuto surprises you by wishing you goodnight in Thai before he falls asleep (while you’re giving him head rubs), your heart explodes BECAUSE why is he the cutest thing in the world ?!?!?!

RELATIONSHIP COMMUNICATION:

You don’t text/you’re bad at texting? That’s fine, mainly because bby owl is so busy with volleyball anyway, but if you don’t text him back when he is feeling needy the boy will call you 20 times in a row

When you finally pick up, your heart is beating like thinking it’s an emergency

But he will answer saying:

“Oh, no emergency. I just want booty pics. Please, Nin babyyyyy?”

you’re like: 😑

ANOTHER CUTE THING YOUR MAN DOES?????

AIGHT:

It’s cringey but.......

When you’re at work all day doing makeup and he’s home he will send you pics throughout the day of him taking care of your plants like they are y’alls newborn children:

His text:

Baby look!!! Ollie the Orchid grew to 7 inches today!!! Yesterday he was 6.8 inches!!!!! They grow up so fast 😭😭😭”

Your reply:

Not quite as long as your dick, Bo

His reply:

I hate when you get me horny when I’m trying to take care of the kiiiids 😭😭😭😭

Dkm

Of all the factors you look for in a man, Bokuto has all of them

Like I said he becomes much more mature when you and Akaashi are his closest compadres

What people don’t know is that Kōtarō is actually very mature he is just a hardcore optomist (besides emo mode lmao) so people often mistake him as immature or dumb

But He’s far from it and you see that everyday

It’s why you fell for him

When dealing with serious issues that life has to handle, you see a different side of Bokuto, a real side, the side he shows in every tough volleyball game when he makes you metaphorically step behind him so he can deal with any problem that comes your way

He would literally withstand all your battles if that meant you’d remain happy forever

We stan a relationship like yours💞

NSFW:

okay so you know how you chill in ballet 🩰 stretches sometimes?

THAT DRIVES KŌTARŌ WILD.

It turns him on so much and he is constantly testing how flexible you are in the bedroom

When you keep meeting his expectations he is POUNDING you cause he is so turned on

He fucking loves it

It also turns him on when you’ll be acting shy and stuff but then randomly you’ll lead your neighbourhood soccer team like a BAD BITCH

When he sees that he’s already asking Akaashi how long until the game ends because he’s horny:

Akaashi deadpans. “Too much information. And the game just started 3 minutes ago. Get a water and calm yourself.”

Bo is sad but it makes for one hell of a I’m-proud-of-you sexscape when you get home from your game!!

Your dirty jokes also turn Bokuto on.

A lot.

A lot a lot:

“Bo.....I was joking.”

“I know but if I hear the word ‘dick’ coming out of your mouth I automatically think of you blowing me so now I want us to go home.” He whines.

You sigh. He’s lucky he’s so fucking hot.

When you’re playing street fighter every night this boy will not leave you alone until you cockwarm him

“Nin can you pleaseeeeee warm my cock while you train? I miss you.”

Your concentration turns him on so he has to ask nicely 😊

You love his dick so of course you oblige

Bby owl is so happy just sitting there being in your company and in your warmth but sometimes or every time he ends up thrusting into you

Sometimes while he’s giving you deep slow thrusts he orders you to keep playing or he won’t get you off

Damn 🤤

Let’s not forget also that you drive your man wild by walking around the house in hoodies all the time and nothing else

Every day, another hoodie will be found in various RANDOM places in the house because Bo flings it off you before he makes love to you wherever, and they go missing

Finally, when you get all sad and pouty because one of your baker trials goes to shit (ruined chocolate brownies this time, boo 💔), your boyfriend is taking your hand gently in an instant, leading you to the bedroom:

“Don’t be sad my beautiful girl, you know how much I hate seeing you sad. It makes me sad.! Here, come in the room and sit on my face—I promise I’ll make you feel better.”

WELL DAMN—😳💦

Maybe you should screw up brownie recipes more often.

————————————

A/N: do you know the show what would you do??? Watch it on YouTube if you haven’t haha I couldn’t stop thinking about you and Bokuto being on it after reading your matchup profile!!!! I hope you liked it bb! Give me all your reactions, I want all the smoke 💞💞💞

[srlkiller]

Top 5 fav movies

bitchhhhh i hav so many wtf music and movies are my fav things in this world idk where i would b or who i would b without them.. i think about that sm like if i don’t listen to certain music or watch certain vids/shows/movies daily i deadass go insane n want to die n go full homicidal n suicidal without fail idk what that is but shit is apirittttuaaalll. ima give u 5 that i believe are must watch, off of an substance or sober and ones i hav watched 1000000x n still am obsessed w but in no order ok!!! i love cult classic movies n sumtimes wen i say that ppl get confused on wtf i mean by that... but by ‘cult classics’ i think of movies that started it all for their genre/generation n were both creative asf yet super realistic.. so like tovme there amazing cult classic horror films n cult classic psych thrillers that started it all for movies yeaaaaars to come n the majority of ppl ive spoken to either haven’t bothered to watch, didn’t kno it existed or only watch the new ones.. which angerrrrrrs me beyond belief bc wtf???

my oldest cousin on my dads side used to collect vhs when he lived w my aunt n it was mostly always ‘horror’, shit like scream (2,3,4) i know what u did last summer (i still know wydls), urban legend (1998), prom night (i saw this w my dad in theatres i think lol), the original halloween n the sequels except the most recent one lol ect ect so i was introduced to alllll that shit suuuupeer young at like idek 8 years old mayb? mayb younger. n was never scared of any of it surprisingly lol wen i would get random weekends or whatever tf w my dad we would spend time watching movies n then he would show me his favs too which i looooved but they were more psych thrillers like silence of the lambs, the shining, along came a spider (a lot of original Alex cross ones), the bone collector, the sixth sense (AMAZES THE FUCK OUT OF ME HOW MANY PPL DONT KNO BOUT THIS MOVIE??)

I never liked super gory movies tbh which is kinda weird cuz i luv blood?? i jus hate when they try so gory overkill shit with the sound effects n it looks fake n stupid so i avoided watching the saw movies for soooo long BUT THEN i was best friends w a girl who loved the saw series n explained like the entire premise of the Saw movies n realised how well thought out that shit was n then i was soooo fucking into it.. cuz it was more psychological than anything else it’s jus hella gruesome w the pain he inflicts on ppl but he justifies it n i kinda like that shit lmao.

ANYWAY OMG I BEEN RAMBLING BC ADDERALL I NEED TO AHUT THE FUCKCUP. IMA GIVE U 5 FROM AKROSS THE BOARD OK.

i will never not say scream (i could watch it every single day n it was the first of its kind baaaaby i fell inluv w this film the first time i saw its perfect in every way)

remember the titans!!!! (i still remember where i was the v first time i saw this n i thought it was so fucking incredible n it still is u could watch it 30 years from now n it will still hit) in

silence of the lambs (one of the first movies that really got me interested in studying criminology and forensic psychology)

menace II society & straight outta compton (do i even needa explain why... like.. shittennnnme?? iconic)

gia or the bone collector or girl interrupted or the virgin suicides or prozac nation or pulp fiction orrrr like requiem for a dream, donnie darko, eternal sunshine of the spotless mind (but like high), american psycho, fight club, changeling, den of thieves, foxfire, Forrest Gump ect ect the rest would b documentaries but although a lot seem sporadic n all over genres to me they all realistic in so many ways.. i love movies like that. no fanasty bs

[gerrrtahere]

25/30 Star Trek TOS S1

今日高能爆笑o(*≧▽≦)ツ

This episode is so juicy in so many...jsaifjioqjfiojjioq3uiocoq83y9hiew

--

[Spock acts like humans ]

Doc: That didn’t sound AT ALL like Spock, Jim.

Kirk: No, it — I thought you said you might like him if he mellowed a little.

[well maybe bc its too much]

Doc: I DIDN’T SAY THAT

Kirk: You said that. I

Doc: NOT EXACTLY...He might be in trouble

[yes he’s indeed in serious troubles you two drop joking now plz!]

--

I...

--

someone should turn this into a surprise party gif

--

and every time when Mr. Sulu entered some weird mental-manipulated zone, he became a brightly smiling angel!!!

--

UHURA MARRY ME.

--

The scene where Kirk and only Kirk being with Enterprise had me right there. It’s such a poetic presentation of the meaning of the crew. You realized their existence when they were all absent. And then you had…ANOTHER SURPRISE B-BOX PARTY!!!!! (JK

--

IMPORTANT

[the scene where Kirk tries to irritate Spock and kinda pushes many buttons.]

#Half-breed [Spock even thought it was somewhat applicable this time lol. Well, Mr. Spock, the normal you don’t have such good temper or high tolerance on this AT ALL.]

#An overgrown jack rabbit [??? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH Are you sure you are not teasing, Captain?]

#An elf with a hyperactive thyroid [okay i get it elf part but a hyperactive thyroid…? thy…?]

#simpering devil-eared freak [yes i’m learning how to be articulate from ST]

#and you’ve got that gall to make love to that girl [whoa harsh and I sense a point…another point here?]

#a carcass full of memory banks who should be squatting in a mushroom [it’s heartbreaking until “mushroom”…I wonder…why mushroom (with a serious brooding face or try not to grin…)] [edit: thx to good tumblr ppl i know now :)

#You belong in a circus, Spock [and join Dick Grayson? that would be perfect, a true heaven. Batman approving gaze.gif ]

[Then, a fight]

[Then, Spock came back.]

Kirk: Had enough? I didn’t realize what it took to get under the thick hide of yours. [my brain…stop inventing some NSFW stuff alright?] Anyhow, I didn’t know what you’re so mad about. [Awww that’s sweet. AND KNOW YOU KNOW. and don’t take advantage of it in some way.]

Spock (back from the shock): You did that to me deliberately.

Kirk: Believe me, Mr. Spock, it was painful…[it’s just so sweet that he apologizes immediately] in more ways than one [LMAO]

[Also,]

Spock: Striking a fellow officer is a court-martial offense.

Kirk: Well if we both in the brig, who’s going to build the subsonic transmitter? [he said both!! thumbs up to his integrity and almost-knee-reflex belief in equity. and my brain totally don’t mind if they can share one brig. STOP.]

OKAY - BUT - HERE - IS - THE - BOOM:

[Sober Spock explained his choice to Layla]

Spock: I have a responsibility…to the ship…to that man on the bridge.

[THAT MAN ON THE BRIDGE!!! @#$%^^&**HSGahefaskjhuiffnkajsfhuijfdiojlaksjfioaewjflkwmcaeje%^&G! and uh...excuse me but...Mr. Kirk and Mr. Spock, could both of you please stop using Enterprise and its 5-year mission as a coping strategy to unconsciously divert your own attention from your too-strong-and-dramatic-to-be-subconscious feelings for each other?]

and Layla was being so heartbroken but sincere...: I have lost you, haven’t I? Not only you, I l’ve lost of it. [poor Layla 😢 and I enjoyed her performance so much...] 

And this beginning scene is so rare, so treasure, so romantic. I was grinning like an idiot. I’m just so happy his character is developing in such a lovely way in this story. 

His jaw is lovely. Not the spores.

--

Final Final Bonus: 

A George-style mint Julep, conceived by Doc, made by Doc, and enjoyed by Doc.

juicy, right?

[kewltie]

so i have been actively following this super rad manga series called, “Otome Kaijuu Caramelize”, which is about a girl who occasionally turns into a giant ass monster, a kaiju, in the presence of her crush. it’s quirky, weird, and so damn cute so ofc it’s right up my alley. and thanks to that godzilla!bakugou artwork we saw waaaaaay back I COULDN’T GET THIS IDEA OUT OF MY HEAD. 

katsuki is the (next) defender/protector of japan after his mother, the great queen of monsters, had decided she was going to save humanity instead of destroying bc she fell in love with a human call masaru (imagine a giant ass monster WOOING YOU lmao). he’s half kaiju and half human and all temperamental shit, but he gotten good at controlling his transformation which he can now call upon command at will. when he was younger, though, it easily get triggered by any kind of emotional stress/strained but he’s older now and he’s NO NOOB!!! most of the time, katsuki is just a normal high schooler, abit a highly competitive and talented one, but sometimes when there’s a kaiju attacking the coast of japan katsuki transform into his monster alter ego BAKUSHINCHI, a giant firebreathing lizard monster, that protect japan from other giant ass monster!!!!!!

he’s a national secret and is under intense scrutiny so katsuki never had a normal life either by the people who knows who he really is (fear, awe, and nerves are abound in his presence) or his peers who views him as peculiar and odd bc they don’t know how or why but there’s just something strange and inhuman about bakugou. the only exception is his childfriend deku who no matter how much katsuki tried to push him away, izuku always come BACK and is fiercely loyal to katsuki. also,  while most people spurn kaiju and think they’re a nuisance even though they have a KAIJU PROTECTOR IN THE FORM OF KATSUKI AND HIS MOM, izuku kind of um... a fanboy of these kaiju?? e doesn’t seem to fear them at all and even entertain the idea that humans and kaiju can coexist in peace :OOOOO. WHICH had made his childhood rough bc other kids call him the monster’s lover :((((((. it’s actually bc as a child, izuku’s life was save by a kaiju and ever since them he saw them very differently (that kaiju may or may not be katsuki), but also bc he’s a just a good boy at heart and doesn’t see them in all black and white. 

though katsuki and izuku grew up together, izuku was never let in on katsuki’s secret or the true nature of katsuki’s mother. his parents are both scientists who work on the super SECRET lab that study kaiju and as part of that program katsuki was exposed to izuku as a child bc they’re the same age and izuku’s parents thought katsuki needed someone of equal peer so he woudn’t be lonely and have someone to play. izuku had absolutely no clue that the boy he saw in the lab, HIS ONLY FRIEND when he was a child, is the the bakushinchi that fighting for japan against other kaiju right now. 

they got separated around the age of 8 or 10 when a kaiju accidental nearly killed izuku bc izuku and katsuki was allowed to go outside together but under strict surveillance. in this one occasion a kaiju appeared and attacked the place they were at and katsuki wanted to transformed and fight it BUT izuku is right next to him and if he transformed than he was afraid that he would lose izuku and izuku would be terrified of him. his human self couldn’t do much against another kaiju but izuku, who isn’t exactly fearless, with trembling legs stood up and tried to protect katsuki WITH HIS SMALL BODY SOBS. but with a single wave of its hand, the kaiju slapped izuku against a wall and izuku was knocked out. that all it took for katsuki to go berserk and transformed into his kaiju alter ego and fought. they leveled an entire city block with their fighting but he managed to save everyone and izuku. that day cemented his desire to protect everyone, but he couldn’t go through losing izuku again. 

ever since that day, katsuki disappeared from izuku’s life but izuku never stop looking and hoping katsuki would come back even though he fears that it was him that caused katsuki to go away bc he was weak and couldn’t save katsuki in the end. katsuki actually was training with his mom to control his kaiju power so that one day he can take her place as the defender of japan!!!!!! it won’t be until many years later when they’re both 16-17 years old that they meet again and katsuki got his powers locked down. he has been taking his mother’s place to fight other kaiju as the bakushinchi and in one of these battles he meet izuku again bc IZUKU ever since that day when he nearly died and he was saved by the bakushinchi, he has become enamored with kaijus and wanted to be close. He staked out every kaiju’s battles and put himself in the line to record every details and post it on his fansite--which has all the detail and info about a lot of kaiju... but most specifically the bakushinchi who he admits to favoring A LOT. 

katsuki in his kaiju form is fighting some kind of worm with a hundred eyes and he had been worked hard by his mother to get this point where can hold his own against many low-mid tier kaiju and HE HASN’T LOST A BATTLE YET, but the moment he recognized that small form (which is v v v hard bc katsuki is like the size of tokyo tower and everyone kind of look like an ant to him in this form) he got so distracted that he took a tail whipped from the other kaiju and flew into a building. katsuki manages to slap himself sober and put all his focus into the fight so he can yell at izuku later for, like, while everyone was RUNNING AWAY FROM TWO RAMPAGING MONSTERS izuku WAS RUNNING TOWARD THEM INSTEAD bc he’s a reckless idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that’s how they reunite, right after the battle when everything was cleared out and the SUPER SECRET ORG that in charged of kaiju (and occasionally katsuki when he is deem controllable lol) is there to make sure everything is okay, katsuki had turned back into his human self and kinda let izuku assume that he’s part of the org and not, like, IS THE ORG.

so yea, izuku and katsuki meet again upon the aftermath of the kaiju battle where katsuki yell at izuku a lot for what he did while izuku is just super happy to reunite with his childhood friend who disappeared over five years ago. katsuki worked so hard to finally get to this point where he can fully control his power and be near other ppl safely!! but the moment he meet izuku again, katsuki’s heart races and his cheek flush and he can feel the bones underneath his skin trying to break out of his human flesh!!!!!!!!! he thinks it’s fluke. katsuki battles giant ass monsters, HE IS A GIANT ASS MONSTER, and he even knocked his mom down (once!! before she kick his ass but w/e she’s the queen of the monsters so that’s pretty impressive on his part) so NO HUMAN IS GOING TO FUCK WITH HIM. except izuku does totally fuck with him lmao. 

now that they reunited katsuki got permission to join the human’s world as just another teen boy and enrolled himself into izuku school bc he worked soooo hard to prove himself to everyone that he’s SAFE and he can maintain control of his form!!!!! but the more he exposed to izuku the more he realizes these flash of uncontrolable urge and panic energy around izuku is him HAVING A CRUSH AND FREAKING OUT OVER IT. like, when he was younger it was his emotional outburst that triggered his transformation but he’s older and more mature and can handle his power, yet the moment izuku get too close to him he can himself losing control and scales apart on his arm ;AJSDF;ALSJDF lol. 

but it’s not like the crush just appear out of nowhere!! it was nurture since young bc kaiju mate for life. katsuki didn’t know it yet but all that biting izuku’s cheek when they were little (which izuku thought was kinda weird but just katsuki being katsuki) was katsuki laying claim to izuku as his mate. izuku is diff bc he is strong of heart, good nature, and he just loves people so fiercely and katsuki though has the burden to protect japan and humanity is performing his duty but doesn’t nececesary see the value in humanity in the end bc he protects them but they still treat him as a monster, something to be fear and use, bc he knows that the japanese gov’t does everything to keep him a secret and safe but they do it bc they NEED HIM TO FIGHT. but izuku doens’t need him for anything, he just want to be by katsuki’s side sobs!!!!!!! so how could katsuki ever resist that????

izuku isn’t in love with katsuki though. he loves KATSUKI but not in love so katsuki has to work to get izuku to see him in that light. not that he has to work THAT hard at all lol bc izuku was already kinda crazy in love katsuki’s kaiju form bc izuku never forgot the kaiju that saved him when he was a kid and HE DOESN’T EVEN KNOW IT’S KATSUKI!!!! so that save a lot of trouble for katsuki in case he ever reveal his secret, not that katsuki had any idea that izuku is totally ok with A MONSTER BF bc most ppl aren’t lol :P. 

so katsuki takes to wooing his mate as awkwardly as possible bc his frame of ref is literally his mother (whose never let the fact that she’s a kaiju stop her from chasing after his father, HIS VERY TINY FATHER in comparison to her). but the wooing is kinda diffuclt and DANGEROUS, not bc of izuku who is wary of katsuki or anything but of katsuki himself bc everytime izuku touches him katsuki freaks out and his heart just GO DOKIDOKI AND HE CAN FEEL THE URGE TO DESTROY THINGS AND JUST READY TO BREAK SOMEONE FACE IN. everything about izuku is a trigger--the way he smile, his warm laughter, and how he look at izuku with total admiration and it’s all in the way he wears his feelings all over his face. he doesn’t hide how he feels at all and izuku is just full of love for humanity and even KAIJU that katsuki CAN’T HANDLE IT AND JUST WANT TO RAMPAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

so like, dating for them is such a dangerous concept that the japanese org have an entire TEAM full of people prepping and watching izuku and katsuki’s dates, trying to make sure katsuki DOESN’T GO BERSERK over some dumb things like handholding and it’s the most embarrasing, sweet, and hilarious THING EVER. their guardians don’t know whether to laugh or cry that this scary ass monster boy is like so terrified and nervous over this green eyes boy that he transformed into his monster form anytime they touch!!!!!!!!!!!! 

so here are these adults, badass adults themselves who work at a super secret org that deal with giant city destroying monsters, and they’re here surveillance two kids going on a date bc one of them just happen to be the monster boy that is defending their country and the other also happen to be the boy THAT HE IS IN LOVE WITH. it’s all hilarious and ridiculous and they aren’t pay ENOUGH OR THIS SHIT as they watch katsuki try not to freak out at izuku leaning in to close and blow up the entire city block in the process!!!!!!!!!! 

the world is constantly bombard with monsters trying to destroy humanity and here is katsuki one of the last lines of defense and is a BAD ASS MONSTER HIMSELF find himself can’t handle a simple human boy and that’s just a;ja;sjdf;alsjdf;alsdjf;alsdjf the greatest love story on earth.

[sagemoderocklee]

No keep talking Naruto, more so tell me headcanons of GaaLee in a Modern AU where they meet at like a party or something you beautiful soul

aw anon that’s so cute! thank you and i’d be happy to give you a modern AU setting--if you like high school AUs and haven’t checked out my fic, Find Me, you should! Just if you like modern AUs and all! :D i also have a short one shot that’s also a modern AU! 

anyway, so I don’t really see Lee or Gaara as the sort of people who voluntarily go to parties. they’re the sort who get dragged to parties, sof if we were talking them meeting at a party, it would definitely be the sort of situation where they were both dragged there unwillingly--Gaara got dragged by either Kankurou or Naruto; Lee by either Tenten or Sakura and Ino. 

it’s probably one of those things where everyone at the party is friends and knows everyone so Gaara feels even more out of place. Naruto like, immediately leaves Gaara because he got distracted by Sasuke or because he went to grab them drinks but Sai started making jabs at Naruto and so he got sucked into paying attention to Sai, leaving Gaara to find himself a quiet-ish corner to chill in and watch ppl.  

Lee doesn’t mind the crowds but he’s not that close with everyone at the party and he doesn’t like crude jokes or drinking, so he generally tends to be uncomfortable once things get rambunctious which they do pretty quickly so he finds an excuse to step outside and get some air. 

at this point gaara has found his way outside onto the balcony for fresh air and quiet when Lee finds his own way out onto the balcony. 

i imagine lee would apologize for bothering gaara’s peace and quiet. like “oh gosh, I did not realise anyone was out here, excuse me.” like he probably thinks gaara was drinking out there, maybe waiting for someone else which like gaara is definitely annoyed and wishes naruto hadn’t just forgotten he’d dragged gaara to this thing he didn’t want to go to but he’s fairly certain at this point naruto’s had a few drinks and is probably crying about sasuke somewhere or making out with sai to make sasuke jealous

gaara’s like “it’s fine. i just wanted some fresh air.” 

“it is very stuffy in there,” lee agrees laughing. “the smell of alcohol gives me a headache.” 

“you don’t drink?” 

lee emphatically shakes his head. no. absolutely not. it does... not agree with me.” he says this delicately because well how DO you explain to someone that when you drink you think everything is a fun sparring match??? and that maybe you watched one too many bruce lee and jackie chan movies as a kid? 

“me neither.” gaara doesn’t like drinking because he doesn’t like to not be in control of his mind or body. 

“did you come here by yourself?” 

“no, a friend dragged me.” 

lee laughs. “me too. but they are all drinking. I am usually the designated driver, so i do not mind coming along if it means my friends will get home safely, but i do not particularly like partying.” 

they probably get quiet for a bit and lee’s starting to wonder if he should go inside, but now he’s kinda interested in talking to this very attractive person so he fishes around for something to say. 

“who did you come with?” 

“naruto.” 

lee knows naruto so of course he gets excited by this. “oh! i know him! he and i went to school together. actually, most of the people i know here went to school with us.” 

“he’d mentioned something like that.” 

“i am rock lee, by the way.” lee offers his hand to shake gaara’s. gaara kind of looks at lee’s hand like ??? before he decides to take it.

“gaara”

‘that is a really interesting name!” 

gaara hums noncommittally before going quiet again. 

“well i do not want to bother you,” lee finally says because he feels like now he’s being annoying and maybe overstayed his welcome. 

“you’re not,” gaara tells him before lee can disappear. gaara knows he’s not great at making new friends or just talking to new people in general. temari’s always trying to help him but he feels like he’s kind of hopeless. still it’s worth a shot. lee’s nice and he’s not drinking or acting like a dumb 20 year old the way everyone inside is. which he supposes is fine given that it’s a party but it’s just not what he likes.  

lee, of course, smiles his usual bright lovely smile because he’s really quite glad that he’s not bothering gaara. “oh, good. I was worried i was being intrusive.” 

gaara snorts. “hardly. that is intrusive,” he says gesturing towards the party. “but it’s a party so i suppose i cant complain.” 

lee laughs. “well if you did not want to come i can understand your complaints.” 

“naruto’s probably forgotten i’m even here.” 

“i am sure he did no such thing! he is very popular though, so it is easy for him to get caught up in the excitement. plus, I think I saw Sasuke-kun earlier--that is sure to keep him distracted.” 

gaara can’t help but smile. “sasuke has a way of distracting him. what about your friends?” 

“oh, sakura-san and ino-san are dancing. once they have a few drinks, sakura-san always gets a bit... emotional. but ino-san is taking good care of her. if they need me they will come find me.” 

“i hope they don’t need you,” gaara says because it’s the first thing that pops into his head. he doesn’t usually enjoy himself at parties or in big crowds, and whenever he goes someplace with naruto or kankurou they’re always the life of the party and get dragged away leaving him by himself. it’s nice to actually have someone to talk to and distract him from all the overwhelming noise, someone who’s actually not that hard to talk to, if he’s being honest. he’s still not good at it. but he’s at least comfortable right now. he feels immediately as though a spotlight is shining on his face, and lee’s eyes go somehow wider than they naturally are. 

lee is also blushing. 

gaara may be blushing too. 

and now neither of them know what to say because gaara has definitely put his foot in his mouth. did that come out wrong? why is talking to people so hard? 

“i... i would not mind if they did not need me,” lee finally manages, feeling just a bit bold. “in fact, they both have my number, so if they need me they can call, but uh, since we both do not like parties, would you... like to go somewhere else? until it is over? we could... get something to eat? my treat, of course!” 

gaara isn’t good with things like flirting and dating. he usually doesn’t pick up on the subtlety of flirting and no one’s ever actually asked him out before--well, not counting that one time his freshman year of high school when a girl gave him a letter and he accidentally made her cry because he is very very bad at this sort of thing. 

but he thinks lee is asking him out and he does like lee’s smile, so he says yes. what’s he got to lose? lee seems nice and genuine. the sort of person he could be friends with even if it’s not a date. the fact that gaara hopes lee’s asking him out on a date takes him completely by surprise of course because he’s never really noticed someone so immediately. but he supposes there’s a first time for everything. 

they do go out to eat at a nearby restaurant, and they have a really good time. lee’s incredibly sweet and polite and he’s genuine and fun and his flirting is actually quite obvious because he blushes each and every time he says something flirty and when gaara returns the favor he blushes even more and smiles so much his cheeks are probably aching which makes gaara smile too. lee pays for gaara’s food and doesn’t even complain when gaara orders more than most people might which may have something to do with the fact that lee seems to have an appetite just as large as his. 

just as they’re leaving and lee’s offering to walk gaara home, gaara’s phone goes off. a drunk naruto slurs into his ear “gaaraaaa where are you?” 

gaara has to fight not to roll his eyes as he explains and naruto seems to be relieved because apparently he’s going home with sasuke. naruto may make some crude remarks about gaara ‘getting it’ before he hangs up. lee is beat red so he definitely could hear naruto’s rather loud slurring. 

“is naruto-kun okay?” lee squeaks, ever the proprietary person gaara is quickly learning him to be. 

“i’d say he’s better than okay. have your friends contacted you?” 

“oh, yes, i texted them just before we left. ino-san said she is sober enough to get her and sakura-san a lyft home so I should not worry. she assured me she would text me once they arrived home safely.” 

gaara smiles. “good. i’d like the company on the walk home.” 

lee walks gaara home, and maybe they walk a little closer together than two people who just met might normally walk, but gaara’s quite pleased by it and if when lee says goodnight and doesn’t kiss him he’s disappointed, well he reasons there will be other chances. he gives lee his number and lee’s promised to call soon. gaara tells lee to text him when he gets home safely which lee of course does. he also calls gaara the next day because ‘soon’ to lee means ‘right away after we have both gotten some sleep and at a reasonable hour’

they make plans for that weekend and gaara decides that he’s going to get that kiss by the end of it.

[pickalilywrites]

I know requests are closed but I have an idea if you ever wanna use it. Since it's Canon that Eren has a high alcohol tolerance, I'd like to see someone find him in a bar surrounded by empty bottles and assume the worst only to find him as sober as he ever is. I just think it'd be funny, Eren Jaeger himself cannot get drunk.

this is how ppl get inducted into the jaegerbros club

Care For a Drink 

Eren Jaeger. Canonverse. 

1099 words. 

Buy me a ko-fi!

The new recruit grumbles as he hurries on over to the pub where Floch had told him Eren would be. He pushes through the crowded streets, muttering under his breath. He doesn’t understand why Floch, a seasoned veteran who actually knows Eren, hadn’t gone himself to fetch the revolutionary leader. Even though the man had claimed he was busy with the new revolution, it seemed to the soldier that Floch simply liked to wave his gun around and feel important. He’d never say that out loud, of course. Despite his dislike for the revolutionist, he still believes in the cause and is willing to fight side by side with the man. Of course, the rumors about Floch and his sadistic ideas for those who threaten to defect also help the soldier keep his mouth shut.

In truth, he doesn’t mind the task. It’s far easier and less sneaky than assignments given to others – influencing the minds of young trainees that are on the fence about joining the Jaegerists, meeting with nobles in secret to request funds to support the cause, or feeding information to Marley volunteers that are on their side. Finding a person sounds easy in comparison, although the soldier thinks it would be much easier if he only knew what the person looked like. Floch, of course, did not offer to give him a description.

“You’ll know when you see him,” Floch had said, waving the soldier away without another word.

The soldier gave a simple salute and turned to leave, not bothering to ask any further questions because he knew Floch would refuse to give him any answers. Instead, he decided to follow the few directions that were given to him before he left.

He ends up wandering into a bar. It is one that he has passed by many times but never actually entered because he had no reason to. Even if he were of age to drink, he would never step foot in such an establishment unless he absolutely had to. Compared to the new pubs opened by Marleyans that carry gin and rum from overseas, this tavern is unrefined and has little to offer aside from the Eldian beers that have been around for centuries. Still, it manages to attract a decent amount of customers every night, drunken patrons who come for a cheap bottle of wine to share with friends…but not tonight.

The soldier is surprised when he approaches the bar and notices that the loud cheers and laughs are nowhere to be heard. Cautiously, he reaches for the door and pushes it open, wondering if there will anyone at all inside. The sight astounds him.

There are bottles of every liquor imaginable on the floor – vodka, whiskey, rum, gin. All are empty, not a single drop remains inside. The soldier isn’t quite sure how to walk without stepping on them, so he treads carefully, making sure to sweep away the empty bottles to clear a walkway as best as he can. He nearly has a heart attack when he almost treads on someone’s fingers.

Looking around, he realizes that the pub is not only covered in empty bottles but also drunken patrons who couldn’t hold their liquor. As he walks in further, he wonders what caused these men to drink so much. People are slumped across the floors and tables, their mouths hanging open and with sweat and beer staining their clothes. They’ve done this to themselves, he knows, but he still can’t help but pity them as he glances over at their sleeping forms. He’s sure that they’ll all be waking up with a wicked hangover in the morning.

He wonders if Eren Jaeger is among these people, and he hates the thought of sifting through these bodies to find the leader of the revolution. He’s about to begin looking, but he looks up and sees that there are still two people sitting at the bar. As he steps closer, he sees that both are awake. One is the bartender, a stoic expression on his face as if he’s seen this sight before. The other is a man with long dark hair, his back turned to the soldier.

The soldier isn’t sure what he had thought Eren Jaeger would look like. He’s only heard of him from others about the man’s quest to find freedom for everyone, the sacrifices he’s made for them, and the immense power he holds. If he had to conjure up an idea of what such a revolutionary would look like, he would come up with the image of a man with a strong jaw, dark hair that’s slicked back, and bright eyes that are able to see further than anyone else could imagine. This haggard man, thin and tall with dark hair down to his shoulders, doesn’t look anything like what a revolutionary leader should look like, and yet the soldier’s breath still hitches when the man turns around and looks at him with piercing gray eyes. He stares at the soldier so intensely that the soldier is sure the man’s not drunk at all, and he wonders if it’s because the man has hardly had a drop or if it’s because he’s managed to outdrink everyone in this bar and doesn’t feel a thing. Somehow, the soldier knows it’s the latter.

The soldier tries to speak, but he seems to have lost his voice. He stares at the man in front of him, opening and closing his mouth like a fish out of water. It’s only when the man turns back around, tapping the bar in front of him to signal the bartender for another drink, that the soldier finally manages to find his voice. “Are you…are you Eren Jaeger?” the soldier asks.

The man does not reply right away. Instead, he waits for the bartender to pour his whiskey, and it seems as though a century has passed. “I am,” the man replies, picking up his glass. He does not look at the soldier when he speaks nor does he ask for his name. He simply taps the bar once more, and the bartender places down another glass and begins pouring. It is only then that the man turns his head, gesturing for the soldier to join him. “Care for a drink?”

The soldier knows that he should decline lest he wants to wind up like the other patrons of this bar. Still, he walks towards the bar and takes a seat beside the man. He reaches for the glass, but his eyes are on Eren Jaeger as he replies, “Yes.”  

[rorypcarson]

it’s hope??? again??? yes u read that right here’s my son rory love us this blog is so new so nothing will be in the tags i hate everything lmao anyway like this or message me to plot ily bye

triggers: car crash, drunk driving, stroke, abortion, death, depression ( mention )

╰☆╮ DACRE MONTGOMERY ─ RORY PEARSON identifies as CISMALE and uses HE/HIM pronouns. they’re a YOUTUBER/MUSICIAN, and they’re only TWENTY-TWO ! they’re said to be +CANDID, but also -DESPONDENT. i guess that’s why they’re known as THE ACCIDENTAL BILLIONAIRE in the tabloids. ( kendall schmidt, logan henderson )

did i use two btr bois as his vc??? u bet ur ass i did & i have no regrets ok anyway on to my son 

background: 

rory pearson was born and raised in fairhope, alabama.  his parents were teenagers when they had him and lived with his grandma scarlett.  his mom jean marie was ousted by her parents when she told them she was pregnant and his dad’s mom took her in with open arms.  

of course his grandma wasn’t going to let them live in the same room in her house without being married, especially with her grandbaby on the way.  so after talking with them, and his parents agreeing, they went to the courthouse and got married three months before rory came into the world.  

rory was born on april 20th, 1996 and he was without a name for six days.  his parents couldn’t decide so they named him rory wyatt vincent pearson.  he was always told that since his parents couldn’t decide on naming him after jean marie’s grandfather or greyson’s father, they picked a third name and gave him both of their names for middle names.  

when rory was two and a half years old ( not really half, it was june ?? ) his parents graduated high school and went out for a party.  unfortunately their designated driver wasn’t so sober and the group of four recent graduates crashed into another car.  

his father was in the passenger’s seat and died on impact, his mother was pronounced dead in the ambulance on the way to the hospital.  

scarlett legally adopted rory after that and raised him.  she always told him stories of his parents, but avoided telling him anything about what happened to them for as long as she could.  

he was ten years old when he saw the memorial and recognized his parents from their yearbook photos and came home asking about it.  

honestly this is jumping ahead a bit but rory didn’t learn to drive until he was twenty years old.  and even now, esp now, since he lives in nyc he doesn’t drive often. 

okay when he was seventeen years old he met bethany in an airport.  he was on his way to a college interview on a connecting flight that got cancelled due to weather conditions.  they were both sitting in the same terminal so they got to talking and !!! hit it off

bro legit asked her out 5 seconds after their flights were announced to be back on

“hi yeah we just met but we’ve got two hours before your flight leaves so wanna go grab some food with me???” 

and the rest was legit history

he can remember every moment of their conversation and first date like it was yesterday. oh my god he was SO IN LOVE 

the human embodiment of the hearteyes emoji

and so the pair stayed in touch and went on a couple more dates and the boy was so gd smitten that grandma scarlett took his phone during one of their phone calls and was like “darlin if you don’t fly down here to meet me i’m going to think my grandbaby is just talking to a complete stranger on here.” 

and then bethany flew down and met scarlett and she was so excited because !!!! her grandson had a girlfriend !!!! 

grandma scarlett was the biggest supporter of anything rory did in life oh my GOD 

at his graduation it was just grandma scarlett in the crowd for him but boy did it sound like the whole crowd was cheering for him when his name was called 

anyway flash forward to he’s in college and he’s moved away to be closer to bethany.  which should not have affected his life but when he was looking at colleges fr fr after acceptances the boy chose one closer to his girl

we love a softie ok 

anyway on bethany’s 19th birthday he took her to an airport and was surprising her with a trip to disney that he’s been saving up for for MONTHS !!!! 

and at the airport he was like all jittery and nervous bc in his pocket he had an engagement ring but he did his bEST to hide it all from beth bc surprises 

not that he planned the whole thing ( he did ) but it just so happened they were in the same restaurant waiting for their flight as their first date way back when

and in the middle of dessert, the waiters singing happy birthday this boy attempts to be sly and gets down on one knee.  but didnt realize there would be someone coming up behind him to keep up the singing and he ..... kinda caused a mini avalanche of people

and he apologized and is like still on one knee and now he’s looking at bethany with a BRIGHT RED face and he had had this whole speech worked out in his mind ok but all that comes out is, “i love you, please marry me?” in like an awkward stutter because he just TOOK OUT AN ENTIRE WAITSTAFF 

somehow bethany said yes ??? and they’re engaged ??? 

oh and someone got the whole thing on camera and like that happened 

the video skyrocketed to the most viewed video entitled “i witnessed an awkward proposal???? and she still said yes?????” 

which is also lowkey how he started his youtube channel ?? 

“hi yes it’s me the guy who proposed to an olympic athlete while taking out a whole waitstaff?? i dont know why she said yes either but i love her??”

and for a long time it was mainly vlogs of him and beth and him and his friends 

okay so fast forward and rory’s graduated college with a degree in history education bc he wants to be a teacher and he’s got to fly back to alabama and miss his graduation because he got a phone call and grandma scarlett had a stroke

so the boy is freaking out but it’s fine !!! grandma goes home and he winds up staying down and now he’s trying to figure out how to be with beth, find a job in ny, but also take care of his grandma 

for a while he toys with the idea of moving grandma up to new york and helping her find a place.  so he goes back to new york to talk to beth about it and he’s freaking out and he gets home and she tells him she’s pregnant

of course he never expected to be like 20 and having a baby but ??? whatever.  now he’s freaking out because his grandma is not doing good and he’s worried about her and now he’s got to figure out what to do with a BABY ???

and bethany then tells him she wants to get an abortion and rory’s already stressed and so he flips bc of emotions and they get into a huge fight and it just winds up with him leaving and heading back to alabama and bethany in their apartment  

so rory goes home to alabama and he keeps getting notifications on social media about bethany so he just shuts his phone off and i’m talking like he goes days without touching his cell phone.  he takes a hiatus from youtube because he’s freaking out and 

two months after he’s home he seemed like scarlett was doing better so he took her to a party in town to see some of her friends and at the party scarlett had another stroke.  

she died six days later, never waking up from the medically induced coma they put her in.  

flash forward a couple more weeks after he’s working with lawyers for his grandma’s estate and rest assured scarlett pearson had nothing but her house, her garden, and her beat up corvette that her deceased husband wyatt bought her for their anniversary one year

so its a shocker to find out that scarlett pearson was worth 43.7 billion dollars 

and now that money all goes to rory because he’s her only living heir ???

so rory gets this BOATLOAD of money and the local newspaper picks it up which brings it to the national news and somehow it made international news

“local alabama boy from youtuber to billionaire overnight” 

so he kept his grandma’s house in alabama because ..... he can’t seem to let that go and why should he ?? its a good house and holds a lot of memories

but he does in fact buy a brownstone in manhattan its HUGE and he doesn’t have enough things to fill the whole space up but ??? he’s working on it slowly. 

he created a makeshift recording studio in one of the upstairs rooms and has been working on music, which is new to him ?? he was always a bit artistic but never sure enough to like try it out

oh and he’s returned to youtube, he’s got a decent following i guess 

i mean lbr he’s hot ???? and sings ??? so ??? ya know 

personality: 

okay so this is long already so im gonna keep this short n sweet

rory is a sweet boy, never really an athletic type always more focused on his studies than sports.  

spent a lot of time with his grandma and he’s very easily attached to people he’s close to.  not exactly clingy, but it’s really hard for him to let people go i guess ??? 

used to love shows like survivor and big brother and amazing race. always toyed with the idea of applying to be on amazing race but he never had anyone who would go with him, or could for that long.  

he’s a real kind hearted guy and clumsy as fuck

a bit awkward when you first meet him but ??? you warm up quickly and so does he

clumsy af as noted earlier 

kind of depressed ??? idk he’s not seeing anyone for it but post losing beth, his grandma, and like the possibility of a family in the future he’s kinda ..... morbid 

puts on a happy front for youtube

oh and he does a podcast talking about stuff with his friends idk what exactly but ?? its prob music and movies lbr

connections: 

best friend(s)--self explanatory; people who he gets along with and they’re like his ride or dies.  

nerd friends--give him someone to geek out with please he’s SUCH A NERD !!!! or someone who likes learning random things he’s got u 

musical friends--people who he met through starting to delve into music 

youtube community--give me people who !!! met through youtube and often do colabs together.  probably ppl who were shooketh when he came back and was like “bro i have 40 billion dollars????”

wealthy friend(s)--give me someone who will teach this boy how to be wealthy ??? like cause he knows nothing about that he struggled a lot growing up and with college and several part time jobs he doesnt know how to like party or anything 

idk anything else 

[clwnry-blog]

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗱     𝗽𝗹𝗼𝘁𝘀  !          :          under     the     cut,          you’ll  find  some  fleshed  out  plots  i’d  love  to  fill  for          river,          lou,          &          jane.          please  feel  free  to  hit  me  on  discord  or  ims  to  discuss.          i’ll  update  these  as  they  get  filled,          &          as  i  come  up  with  more  ideas  hehe.          all  my  uwus  to  ppl  for  reading  this.

𝐑𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑     𝐀𝐑𝐆𝐔𝐄𝐓𝐀          :          INTRO     HERE.

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗣𝗥𝗢𝗧𝗘𝗚𝗘.      (  0  /  1  )     :          river  has  years  of  experience  in  hand  to  hand  combat,          &          still  works  as  a  self  defence  trainer  on  the  side.          they’re  a  lot  younger  than  him,          &          mixed  up  in  some  dubious  shit          (  underground  fighting,          any  crime  really,         etc  )          that  puts  them  in  constant  danger.          they  came  to  river,          &          reluctantly,          seeing  their  bruises,          he  agreed  to  help.          he’s  been  training  them  for  free  for  about  three  months.

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗙𝗟𝗜𝗡𝗚𝗦.     (  0  /  4 ?  )     :          always  a  free  spirit,          &          with  little  time  to  foster  long  lasting  relationships  due  to  his  marine  terms,          river’s  had  a  fair  few  flings  over  the  years.          he’s  bisexual  so  these  could  be  with  any  gender,          recent  or  in  the  past.          they  could  have  been  ongoing  or  a  one  time  thing.          being  who  he  is,          he’d  try  to  remain  on  decent  terms  with  anyone  he  used  to  sleep  with,          but  i  don’t  mind  a  bit  of  angst  either  hehe.            

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗕𝗘𝗦𝗧     𝗙𝗥𝗜𝗘𝗡𝗗.     (  0  /  1  )     :          i’m  thinking  life  long.          they’d  be  around  his  age,          &           could  have  either  served  in  the  marines  with  him,          or  maintained  their  friendship  throughout  the  years  while  he  was  away.          they’re  absolutely  ride  or  mf  die  !          if  you’re  looking  for  a  new  character,  ,,,        pedro  pascal  blease.          otherwise,          any  fc  is  good.

𝐋𝐋𝐄𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐘𝐍     𝐆𝐔𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐃𝐆𝐄          :          INTRO     HERE.

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗔𝗙𝗙𝗔𝗜𝗥.     (  0  /  1 )     :          both  lou          &          his  ex - wife  were  involved  with  other  people  over  the  years.          it  wasn’t  the  undoing  of  their  relationship,          but  definitely  contributed  to  their  divorce.          this  could  have  been  years  ago  or  more  recent.

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗕𝗟𝗔𝗖𝗞𝗠𝗔𝗜𝗟𝗘𝗥.     (  0  /  1  )     :          lou  has  a  soft  spot  for  a  few  criminals  that  has,          occasionally,          lead  him  to  act  in  their  favour  instead  of  the  law’s,          (  ie  :  throwing  out  evidence,          omitting  information  from  reports.  )          someone  caught  him  doing  so          &          has  been  using  it  against  lou.          this  would  be  someone  outside  of  the  police  department  that  could  make  use  of  having  a  cop  in  their  back  pocket.

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗡𝗘𝗪     𝗦𝗣𝗢𝗡𝗦𝗘𝗥.     (  0  /  1  )     :          he’s  been  on          &          off  sober  for  the  last  five  years         -          currently  off  for  about  a  month.          lou  struggles  with  alcoholism  that  affects  every  aspect  of  his  life          &          when  his  sponsor  past  away  recently,          he  relapsed.          his  aa  group  paired  him  with  a  new  sponsor          &          lou  has  been  actively  avoiding  them.

𝐉𝐀𝐍𝐄     𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐀𝐘          :          INTRO     HERE.

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗘𝗫.     (  0  /  2  ? )     :          they  tried  at  a  relationship,          but  things  quickly  fell  apart  because  she  was  too  busy  to  make  time  for  them.          they  perhaps  still  hook  up  occasionally. 

*    ｡    ♡    ◞     𝗥𝗘𝗟𝗔𝗧𝗜𝗩𝗘     𝗢𝗙     𝗦𝗢𝗠𝗘𝗢𝗡𝗘     𝗦𝗛𝗘     𝗖𝗢𝗨𝗟𝗗𝗡'𝗧     𝗦𝗔𝗩𝗘.     (  0  /  1  )     :          it  could  have  been  an  operation  she  was  assisting  in,          or  something  more  gradual  like  an  illness,          either  way  someone  died  partly  under  her  care          &          jane  harbours  guilt  for  it.          she  fostered  a  kinship  with  a  relative  of  the  deceased          :          perhaps  it’s  meeting  for  coffees,          or  dinner  at  jane’s,          whatever  it  may  be,          it’s  a  regular  thing          &          jane  always  makes  time  for  them.