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thewriteadviceforwriters · 11 months ago

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Villains vs. Antagonists (Guide For Writers)

Hey there, fellow writers and wonderful members of the writeblr community! 📚✍️ It's Rin here and...

Today, we're diving into a topic that's close to many writers' hearts: villains and antagonists. These characters often steal the show, driving our plots forward and giving our heroes something to push against. But here's the thing – while these terms are often used interchangeably, they're not quite the same. So, let's unpack this, shall we?

First things first, let's break down the difference between a villain and an antagonist. It's a distinction that can really elevate your storytelling game!

An antagonist is simply a character (or force) that opposes your protagonist. They're the obstacle, the challenge, the thing standing in the way of your main character achieving their goal. Here's the kicker: an antagonist doesn't have to be evil. They could be a rival love interest, a stern parent, or even nature itself.

A villain, on the other hand, is a specific type of antagonist. They're the bad guy, the evildoer, the character with malicious intent. All villains are antagonists, but not all antagonists are villains. Mind-blowing, right?

Let's look at some examples to make this clearer:

In "Romeo and Juliet," the feuding families are antagonists, but they're not villains. They oppose the protagonists' desire to be together, but they're not evil.

In "Harry Potter," Voldemort is both an antagonist and a villain. He opposes Harry (making him an antagonist) and he's also evil (making him a villain).

In "Cast Away," the island and the challenges of survival are the antagonists. There's no villain in sight!

Now that we've got that sorted, let's dive deeper into how to create these characters and use them effectively in your writing.

Creating Antagonists:

Define their opposition: What specifically does your antagonist do to oppose your protagonist? This could be physical, emotional, or ideological opposition.

Give them a reason: Why are they standing in your protagonist's way? Even if it's not justified, there should be a reason that makes sense to the antagonist.

Make them strong: Your antagonist should be a worthy opponent. They need to pose a real challenge to your protagonist to keep things interesting.

Consider their perspective: Remember, your antagonist is the hero of their own story. Try writing a scene from their point of view to understand them better.

Create contrast: Your antagonist should in some way contrast with your protagonist. This could be in values, methods, or personality.

Creating Villains:

Establish their evil: What makes your villain "bad"? Is it their actions, their beliefs, or both?

Develop their backstory: How did they become evil? A compelling villain often has a tragic or twisted history.

Give them dimensions: Pure evil can be boring. Give your villain some complexity – maybe they love their cat or have a soft spot for classical music.

Create a strong motivation: What drives your villain? Greed? Revenge? A twisted sense of justice? The stronger and more relatable the motivation, the more compelling your villain will be.

Make them smart: Your villain should be clever enough to pose a real threat. They should be able to anticipate and counter your protagonist's moves.

Now, let's talk about how to use these characters in different genres. Because let's face it, a villain in a romance novel is going to look very different from one in a fantasy epic!

In Romance: Antagonists in romance are often rivals for the affection of the love interest, or perhaps societal norms or family expectations standing in the way of true love. Villains are less common, but when they appear, they might be abusive exes or manipulative friends trying to sabotage the relationship.

Tip: In romance, make sure your antagonist's motivations are clear and relatable. We should understand why they're opposing the main relationship, even if we don't agree with their methods.

In Fantasy: Fantasy is ripe for both antagonists and villains. You might have a Dark Lord seeking to conquer the world (classic villain) or a rival magic user competing for the same goal as your protagonist (antagonist).

Tip: In fantasy, world-building is key. Make sure your antagonist or villain fits logically into the world you've created. Their powers, motivations, and methods should all make sense within the rules of your fantasy realm.

In Mystery/Thriller: In these genres, your antagonist is often the perpetrator of the crime your protagonist is trying to solve. They might not be evil (maybe they committed a crime of passion), or they could be a full-fledged villain if their crimes are particularly heinous.

Tip: In mysteries, your antagonist needs to be clever enough to challenge your detective protagonist. Leave subtle clues about their identity or motives, but make sure they're smart enough to almost get away with it.

In Literary Fiction: Here, antagonists are often more abstract. They might be societal expectations, personal flaws, or even time itself. Villains in the traditional sense are less common, but morally grey characters who oppose the protagonist are frequent.

Tip: In literary fiction, focus on the nuances of your antagonist. They should be as complex and flawed as your protagonist, with their own rich inner life.

In Sci-Fi: Science fiction offers a wide range of possibilities for antagonists and villains. You might have alien invaders, oppressive governments, or even well-meaning scientists whose creations have gone awry.

Tip: In sci-fi, make sure your antagonist or villain is consistent with the technological and social aspects of your imagined world. Their methods and motivations should make sense within the context of your sci-fi setting.

Now, let's dive into some tips to make your antagonists and villains the best they can be in your novel:

Make them believable: Whether you're writing a mustache-twirling villain or a morally grey antagonist, their actions and motivations should make sense within the context of your story and their character.

Give them a personal connection to the protagonist: The conflict becomes much more engaging when it's personal. Maybe your antagonist and protagonist used to be friends, or they're fighting over the same goal.

Show their impact: Don't just tell us your antagonist is a threat – show us the consequences of their actions. Let us see how they affect your protagonist and the world of your story.

Give them wins: Your antagonist or villain should have some successes along the way. If they're always failing, they won't seem like a credible threat.

Humanize them: Even if you're writing a truly evil villain, give them some humanizing traits. Maybe they have a pet they dote on, or a tragic backstory that explains (but doesn't excuse) their actions.

Make them adaptable: A good antagonist doesn't stick to one plan. When the protagonist foils them, they should be able to come up with new strategies.

Give them their own character arc: Your antagonist or villain should grow and change throughout the story, just like your protagonist does.

Use them to highlight your protagonist's strengths and weaknesses: Your antagonist should challenge your protagonist in ways that force them to grow and change.

Consider their presentation: How do other characters react to your antagonist? How do they present themselves to the world versus who they really are?

Don't forget about henchmen: If you're writing a villain, consider giving them some underlings. This can add depth to their character and provide more challenges for your protagonist.

Remember, whether you're crafting a dastardly villain or a complex antagonist, these characters are crucial to your story. They're the ones who push your protagonist to grow, who raise the stakes, and who often drive the plot forward.

But here's a gentle reminder: while it's important to make your antagonists and villains compelling, be mindful of the impact your writing might have. If you're dealing with heavy themes or traumatic events, handle them with care and sensitivity.

Now, I know we've covered a lot of ground here, and you might be feeling a bit overwhelmed. That's okay! Writing complex characters is a skill that develops over time. Don't be afraid to experiment, to try different approaches, and to revise and refine your antagonists and villains as you go.

One exercise I find helpful is to write a short story from your antagonist's or villain's point of view. This can help you understand their motivations better and ensure they feel like real, three-dimensional characters.

Another tip: watch movies or read books in your genre and pay special attention to how they handle antagonists and villains. What works well? What doesn't? How can you apply these lessons to your own writing?

Remember, there's no one "right" way to create these characters. What matters is that they serve your story and engage your readers. Trust your instincts, and don't be afraid to push boundaries or subvert expectations.

As you work on your antagonists and villains, keep in mind that they're not just there to make life difficult for your protagonist. They're an integral part of your story's ecosystem. They shape the plot, influence character development, and often reflect themes or ideas you're exploring in your work.

And remember, writing is a journey. Your first draft of an antagonist or villain might not be perfect, and that's okay. The beauty of writing is in the revision, in the gradual sculpting of characters until they leap off the page.

Lastly, don't forget to have fun with it! Creating antagonists and villains can be some of the most enjoyable parts of writing. Let your imagination run wild, explore the darker sides of human nature, and see where your characters take you.

I hope this deep dive into antagonists and villains has been helpful and inspiring. Remember, you've got this! Your unique voice and perspective will bring these characters to life in ways no one else can.

Happy writing! 📝💖 - Rin. T

Before you go, why not join us at The Write Right Society? We're a supportive Tumblr community where writers lift each other up. Whether you're a newbie or a pro, we'd love to have you! Share your work, get feedback, and connect with fellow wordsmiths, writers and aspiring authors.

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starcurtain · 2 months ago

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"The Lion Has Its Own Historian:" Parallels Between Gorgo and Aglaea

While re-reading Mydei's "As I've Written" stories recently, I was intrigued again by the (seemingly impossible) section in which Aglaea unknowingly echoed Gorgo's words to Mydei, and this led me down a rabbit hole of thought: The roles of Aglaea and Gorgo--not only in Mydei's life but also in the story overall--form some interesting parallels that are worth looking at in closer detail.

Seize the Means of Control

Gorgo's ascension to a position of authority was predicated on power--not only on her martial prowess, which was expected in her culture (i.e. slaying a lion with her bare hands), but through her courage to meet the existing symbol of authority, Eurypon, in single combat and not concede. In Kremnos, status is conferred and maintained through violence. Though on the surface Gorgo defies this belief, she ultimately remains an active participant in Kremnos's tradition of "might makes right" through the Kremnos Festival, reinforcing rather than rejecting her culture's military-centric social structure.

Although Gorgo originally took part in the Kremnos Festival with the intention of beating Eurypon and seizing the throne of Kremnos for herself (presumably because she thought she could rule better), she ultimately chooses to accept his continued leadership and become queen instead, even granting him an heir to cement his legacy. In this way, despite presumably wishing for a less wasteful (of life) philosophy for the Kremnoans, Gorgo becomes one of the foremost beneficiaries of the very mindset she opposes. She clearly wants to reduce the meaningless bloodshed in Kremnos--she strongly rejects the notion of patricide, for example--but she doesn't (at this point) reject the overall structures of the Kremnoan culture, including the belief that combat ability should determine who leads.

In short, her position of authority was achieved strictly through her ability to oppose her foes.

Despite coming from a wholly different culture, one which (ostensibly) values debate, diplomacy, and the rule of law as the primary tools for establishing status, Aglaea's rise to power was remarkably similar to Gorgo's. The game confirms that the prominence and influence of the Chrysos Heirs in Okhema is no lucky accident--instead, Aglaea has clawed her way to the top, fighting tooth and nail to establish herself as a figure of authority in the Holy City.

We're told she exerts her pressure both through economic means, amassing wealth via monopoly on resources such as Amphoreus's internet, and through literal bloodshed.

The story dances around it, but Star Rail's marketing embraces it: Aglaea represents not just the joy of love but also the "deadliness" of romance, the figure of power in Okhema "pulling the strings" and making others dance to the tune of her vision for the future. She basically rules the roost in the Holy City in large part because of her capacity for violence, because of the literal physical and political power she wields as a demigoddess and the leader of the strongest group of fighters on their entire planet.

This "silk concealing steel" behavior reflects not just how she approaches any who oppose her--the Trailblazer and Krateros, for example--but also how even the NPCs throughout Amphoreus view her:

It's particularly Krateros's view of Aglaea which intrigues me, because the very same things he accuses her of are the things Castrum Kremnos is famous for (being warmongers, usurpers of power, etc.). By all rights, he should admire a "queen" such as Aglaea who rules by force and who is leading her people into the greatest war Amphoreus as ever known. And yet he and the rest of the Kremnoans seem to revile Aglaea for the very same things they saw as virtues in Gorgo.

The context is the key: Gorgo seizing power for herself is viewed as honorable and good because it happened in the context of Kremnos, while Aglaea's power struggle and military dominance occur within the so-claimed peaceful structure of Okhema's democratic society, casting her in the role of a "power-hungry tyrant" for the people living in Okhema, even those who should most appreciate her mindset.

Comparing Gorgo and Aglaea in this way highlights a key double standard in the way the Amphoreans react to women who rise to power, and makes it clear how thin the veneer of Okhema's "peace" really is. Stepping to the top rung of the social ladder through the threat of martial retaliation, Aglaea's battle against the Council and the Flame Chase's foes is no different from Gorgo tearing a lion apart with her bare hands, challenging a king, and taking her place at the top of Kremnos's hierarchy by seizing her weapon and making her stand. All that differs is how violence is received in their contrasting cultures, resulting in two diametrically opposed reactions from the "mere mortals" around them.

With Violence as Your Tool

I think it's important to emphasize that Aglaea and Gorgo also parallel each other not just in their rise to authority through physical power itself, but also in their stances on the necessity of that power: Both Aglaea and Gorgo (at least at first) view bloodshed as a necessary evil, an unpleasant facet of life that one must accept in order to achieve a goal. Violence, for both Gorgo and Aglaea, is a tool.

We see this clearly with Gorgo throughout her flashbacks, both in her initial fight with Eurypon (where she claims she would embrace the notion of death only so long as it is not "unnecessary") and in her other confrontations with Eurypon: Gorgo insists that the tradition of regicide must be broken and makes Eurypon promise not to lead Mydei to that path--yet later, she goes so far as to scold Eurypon when he shies away from his fate, essentially calling him a coward for fearing the prophecy that Mydei would one day kill him. "What prince of Kremnos hasn't killed his father?" she taunts, implying that, even as Gorgo fought to change the violent history of Kremnos, she still believed--at least at that moment--that refusing to face violence when it was foreordained made Eurypon a weak and unfit ruler.

However, we ultimately see this stance change. In Mydei's dream of training with his mother, Gorgo reveals that nearly losing Mydei completely changed her perspective on Kremnos's beliefs, finally killing any faith she had in their system of rule and their constant pursuit of Strife for strife's sake. She rejects the notion of combat being the ultimate test of a person's worth, explicitly casts aside her title and role as queen of Kremnos, and embraces a kinder identity as strictly "Mydei's mother." This is a crisis of faith brought on by experiencing the impacts of Kremnos's faith firsthand--by being forced to experience grievous loss, Gorgo is implied to have grown as a person, from one who is willing to accept violence as a tool to get ahead, into one who solely values peace.

These views, too, mirror Aglaea's pursuit of the Flame Chase Journey and her "hidden" feelings toward its necessary loss. We know already that Aglaea views the threat of violence as her go-to "means to an end" when it comes to achieving the Chrysos Heirs' goals.

She is not at all above putting people into harm's way to pursue the prophecy, such as letting Phainon take the Strife trial even knowing that he would fail, and she tells us players over and over again that her own humanity has nearly vanished, claiming that she now no longer has sufficient empathy for humankind to be swayed away from the path of Era Nova.

This is clearly not true (given how deeply she cares for Tribbie, how kind she is to Castorice, and how unwilling she is to actually bring any harm to Anaxa), but Aglaea insists on this emotionless illusion likely because it makes it easier to tolerate the cruelty required to continue pursuing her goal--she needs it to be true that the last of her humanity has already waned, because this is what makes it easier to accept that the Flame Chase Journey is a journey of "loss," one that is fueled by bloodshed.

It is an unfortunate truth of the prophecy that people will die in pursuit of the dream, that capturing all the coreflames and pushing the world forcibly into its next cycle will cost lives and require cold, rational decisions that will crush people's happiness and freedom. Aglaea cannot hesitate, cannot waver, cannot choose kindness over action.

But, like Gorgo, we know that accepting violence as a tool does not mean that the person wielding the tool is always happy to do so. As Gorgo loses her genuine faith in Kremnos's beliefs and begins to view training Mydei for war as nothing more than a rote requirement, devoid of meaning, Aglaea too struggles to uphold her emotionless facade, a protective cocoon whose cracks reveal the enormous weight she is bearing and how deeply the inhumanity of her own decisions wounds her.

We see this clearly in her character stories, where the actions and then later loss of her maid completely reshape her definition of "beauty":

And we also see it very clearly in her behavior toward Anaxa, where she hesitates at the crucial moment, unable to commit to the course of action that she herself set in motion:

Like Gorgo who longs for a softer world where she can simply be Mydei's mother, Aglaea too (no matter how much she claims) has not lost the part of herself that cares not only for the people closest to her but even for the innocents of the world, the boy who wants to bring his sister something beautiful, the girl who shares her bracelet...

Her nature, no matter how much of it has worn away, is at its core humble and kind--reviling the pain of others.

It's this fundamental conflict between love and what must be done that lends both Gorgo and Aglaea their depth as characters, that grants them both an air of nobility, in the way that everyone good who suffers is noble. Being forced to cause harm without a desire to do so creates quintessentially contradictory characters, making the audience privy to both their external mettle and their internal hesitation, easily humanizing both of them. Aglaea and Gorgo are virtuous women whose cruelty is justified for the greater good. Yet in watching both of them struggle under the immense pressure of that cruelty, we recognize the inherent evil of a world that forces kind-hearted people into positions where bloodshed is their only path forward.

Both Aglaea and Gorgo are not women who normally hesitate to seize the tools available to them, or the kind of women who will shy away from wielding their strongest weapon--the threat of death--with impunity. The reaction to female characters who are willing to exert this kind of power over others (including over the men in their lives) both in-game and in the fandom (where Aglaea in particular is treated poorly for her "coldness") demonstrates how unique this particular type of female character still is, and suggests interesting overall power dynamics in Amphoreus that privilege women willing to utilize violence even above men who choose the same route, despite the strong patriarchal bent one might expect of a story with ancient Greece as its primary influence.

Mydei is not the son of Eurypon, but explicitly and always "the son of Gorgo" even in flashbacks where Eurypon is still alive; in Okhema, both the Chrysos Heirs and the Council appear to be primarily directed by women (Caenis occupies the more visible role of Aglaea's opponent than Lygus does), with all of Okhema's demigods (including Cipher) being female. Gorgo's violence is regarded as honorable; Aglaea is met with disapproval from her peace-loving society but no one ever actually dares to stop her. Perhaps Krateros comes closest, by defying Aglaea's will and entering the Strife trial without her permission, but even he ultimately has to be rescued from Aglaea's clutches by Mydei, who explicitly invokes his mother's name to ensure Krateros's safety. Say it with me: The male character with the highest social status in all of Amphoreus has to rely on the power and reputation of his mother to rescue another man from a powerful woman. Amphoreus really said "Ladies first." 💯

Anaxa's reactions to Aglaea are humorous but are also a perfect example of this overall social structure in Amphoreus which assumes strong women in power have an automatic degree of legitimacy because they are willing to seize violence as their means, despite violence being, in real-world cultures at least, stereotypically the domain of men. In 3.1, Anaxa simply accepts it as a given that he will become Aglaea's prisoner and that she will be able to do whatever she wants to him, because nothing in Okhema's social, political, or military structures would enable him to genuinely oppose her (if he even wanted to).

Even in his (sort of) fake-out "siding with the Council" phase, all Anaxa does is move himself from the grasp of one powerful woman to the next, shifting from being Aglaea's prisoner to Caenis's ace. Cerces even has an entire voiceline where she points out word-for-word that Anaxa is functionally just moving from one woman's cage to the next. Caenis in particular seems to view Anaxa as an object, a biting dog she can keep on a leash until she sics him on her enemy. Anaxa obviously is not so easily manipulated, but Caenis's threat about karma eventually comes true, and he nevertheless suffers the final wrath of the Holy City's society, being judged more harshly than anyone else for his seeming unwillingness to submit to the power of either woman in control of Okhema.

Both literally and thematically, the game tells us players that Aglaea and Gorgo are courageous and effective leaders because they live by the blade, because they are willing to harden their hearts and do whatever it takes, whether that means taking another's life--or their own.

To Usher in a New Era

Of course what really distinguishes both Gorgo and Aglaea's willingness to cause harm from malevolent forces in Amphoreus is their ultimate intent. Although both women are willing to do whatever it takes, they do so only in service to a greater purpose, one that they believe will better their world. In this way, Amphoreus's writers reinforce the underlying impression in Amphoreus's plot that women are more trustworthy and reliable leaders than their corresponding male counterparts. Slight side note on this, but it's kind of funny just how consistent this is--even "outside" of Amphoreus, Welt and Sunday had to turn to Herta to save the day, while inside Amphoreus, Trailblazer is still relying on Acheron's advice to get them through. (When you cater to the incels so hard you somehow loop back around into writing staunchly feminist plotlines...)

The message, repeated and unsubtle, is that there is a link between women's leadership and righteousness, with both Gorgo and Aglaea representing an idealistic desire for a better future for Kremnos and Amphoreus as a whole--one by opposing fate and the other by enforcing it.

Both Gorgo and Aglaea face prophecies that promise to reshape the world as they know it, prophecies which require them to make decisions that will ultimately cost them their lives in a desperate bid to influence history toward the best path. Gorgo rejects the prophecy she is given, determined to protect Mydei despite the destruction the omens claim he will bring to Castrum Kremnos.

Because of the players' predilections for Mydei, this choice to reject fate paints Gorgo as a heroine, an unselfish and moral person who will choose the life of an innocent child over she own safety. Her willingness to fight to the death to prevent Eurypon's atrocity against their son flies in the face of fate itself, attempting to stop an inevitable, self-fulfilling prophecy.

And, in fact, the game even teases us with the idea: What would Kremnos have been like if Gorgo succeeded? When Mydei returns to Kremnos, he either "envisions" or actually experiences (via timelines bleeding into each other), a seemingly parallel universe where Gorgo succeeded in saving him from the Sea of Souls, and where she clearly rallied the people of Kremnos to her cause. The Kremnos we see in that vision is entirely different from Eurypon's:

The people are happy, rejoicing and at ease, talking about pomegranates and writing and playing games with kids, while the sun paints the whole city in a soft and gleaming gold.

Contrast that with the Kremnos that Trailblazer and Castorice find when they travel back into the past where Eurypon betrayed his wife and left Mydei in the sea:

In the seemingly alternate timeline where Gorgo lives long enough to raise Mydei, the Kremnos we're presented with... looks a lot like Okhema. Looks a lot like the peaceful, idyllic Holy City where children frolic in the streets and the people are still full of light and life. By defying fate, we are shown (at least in some fragment of Amphoreus's timeline) that Gorgo achieves what she had longed for in Kremnos from the start, creating a better, gentler future for the people, prosperous and free of the cycle of Strife and meaningless violence that had plagued their kingdom for thousands of years. In this way, we can say that, for that lost timeline at least, Gorgo essentially achieved the Era Nova for Kremnos, ushering in a time of peace for her people. What Aglaea seeks, the game shows us that Gorgo was capable of achieving.

Conversely, Aglaea's path forward involves taking the complete opposite road: Rather than rejecting fate to create a better future, Aglaea seeks to embrace it. She has fully invested herself and her resources in the prophecy of the Flame Chase. She has to, because if there's no Era Nova to look forward to, then there's no hope at all for Amphoreus, and how can it be that something so beautiful is doomed to total destruction? If the Flame Chase Journey will end in a new start, if someone--anyone--will get to live to see the world born anew, then every sacrifice, every burden, every agony will have been worth it.

By embracing her prophesied fate instead of rejecting it, Aglaea is taking the same decisive stand as Gorgo, seizing the future of her world in her own hands and forcing Amphoreus along the path toward what she believes will definitely be a brighter future.

Not only does the description of Era Nova match the idyllic Castrum Kremnos we see under Gorgo's likely rule, but even the moments where both women truly make their stand and reckon with fate reflect each other as well: Gorgo demands her fellow Kremnoans stand with her, hoping they will see the wickedness of Eurypon's decision and reject blind faith in the prophecy they've been given. With her own strength, if even just Krateros alone had stood with her, she easily would have been able to push back against Eurypon's scheme. She lays out her vision for a different future, rejects the notions of the past, and is met with silence.

Meanwhile, Aglaea faces the Council of Elders in Okhema, where the decision about the Flame Chase Journey hangs in the balance, waiting on the final vote of a single person to join up with her cause. Just like Gorgo, the alignment of even one person to Aglaea's cause will make proof of her righteousness, prove the she's right. Aglaea lays down the gauntlet, demands the loyalty of her allies--and her leadership and vision are rewarded when Anaxa joins up with the cause, tipping the literal balance of the scales towards the new era Aglaea believes her efforts will bring to fruition.

(In essence, at the end of 3.2, we get to watch Anaxa do exactly what Krateros failed to--stand on the side of the woman who wields justice.)

Ultimately, through they do it through diametrically opposite paths--rejecting and embracing prophecy, respectively--both women are characterized by their drive to create change, their refusal to accept a quiet descent into cruelty and darkness. Both take a stand, outlining their vision for the right way to go on, for a better, softer, brighter world, seeking the loyalty of comrades to legitimize their causes, and--failing that--willing to make the ultimate sacrifice of themselves to further their truly noble causes.

The strength of both women lies not just in their martial prowess, but in their unwavering dedication to a just cause, no matter the cost to themselves.

Generational Influence

What actually started me off on this whole look at Gorgo and Aglaea as thematic parallels was Mydei's scenes with Aglaea, particularly how he clearly considers her a role model for ideal leadership. While I won't go so far as to say Aglaea perceives herself filling any sort of maternal role for Mydei, I think the connection is obvious on Mydei's end: Having never gotten the chance to truly meet his mother, Mydei is almost certainly projecting "the leader my mother would have been" onto Aglaea. (Or perhaps we should say the opposite: The empty spaces in Mydei's mind when he thinks of "Gorgo" are sutured closed with Aglaea's golden filigree.)

Does this sort of praise sound a bit familiar? It ought to, because this is how Krateros describes Gorgo:

Both women are characterized by their ability to move people's hearts, to inspire hope, and to model ideal strategy for others.

So how could Mydei do anything but link Aglaea's leadership with the life he imagines his mother would have led if she had had the chance to rule Kremnos?

Consider the entire situation from Mydei's perspective: His people have just been (forcibly) rescued from an insane king whose true downfall began with his betrayal of wife, their nation's one genuinely noble leader. If Gorgo had been their ruler, none of this suffering would ever have happened. Fleeing the madness and death Nikador is bringing to Kremnos, the entire surviving host of his people migrate to the "Holy City," the (supposed) last bastion of light and peace and happiness in Amphoreus--which is effectively ruled by a woman so powerful that she knows and sees all.

Seemingly effortlessly, she commands respect and fealty, marshaling her forces to do battle with the might of her own sword, while fighting to maintain the very same values Mydei's mother wanted to bring to her own nation. While being unafraid of bloodshed, she treasures life more than anything else. She's honest, direct, and unflinching, but still, despite everything, kind and dedicated to protecting the world she loves.

Mydei doesn't know his mother but there she is. There's the "queen" that his mother should have had the chance to be. There is the leader that Kremnos needed. There is the powerful woman whose dream for the future could have single-handedly changed the course of fate.

Clearly, for lack of personal experience, the Gorgo in Mydei's mind is less a real person and much more an idealized figure. His only direct knowledge of her comes from one "dream," where she tells him that he's more important than the world to her (undoubtedly leaving Mydei to grapple with the question of whether that is something she truly felt or something he just wishes to be true, by the way). Mydei's only other frame of reference for his mother is Krateros's blind veneration, with Krateros constantly holding Gorgo up as the standard Mydei should meet.

Gorgo is clearly on an achingly high pedestal for Mydei. He shaped his entire youth around the need to avenge her, and then he shaped his entire adult ideology around her vision for Kremnos. In "our" timeline, Gorgo may not have lived to create the change she hoped for, but her goal was ultimately achieved nonetheless, through the inter-generational influence her memory had over Mydei. It was Gorgo's hatred of wasteful bloodshed that helped Mydei to hate it too. It was Gorgo's desire to change Kremnos's traditions that led Mydei to consider tearing down its dynasty. It's his mother's gentle love for her people that echoes in Mydei's same affection.

And through Aglaea, all those views and lessons were enforced. Before joining up with the Flame Chase Journey, the game tells us that Mydei's life was effectively still a hellscape even when he had his friends: They wandered the land with nowhere to call home and were attacked by (or themselves attacked) everyone they met, engaging in endless violence just to keep existing, while he watched his companions be brutally murdered one by one. At the risk of extreme understatement: Mydei was not living the life his mother wanted for him.

After joining the Flame Chase Journey, Mydei becomes one of the "heroes" who dedicates himself to protecting innocents and serving as a guardian; he finds a cause, does his best to create a new home for his people, and works to reshape their views towards the beliefs his mother espoused. Like Gorgo putting down her weapon and taking up the role of "just your mother," Mydei gets to (temporarily, briefly) let down his guard and live as just a person, cooking sweets, roleplaying with kids, and cuddling with chimeras.

He inches closer to the dream of finding meaning in finding peace.

And if it was Gorgo who inspired those choices, then it was Aglaea who made them possible--Aglaea who accepted the Kremnoan Detachment into Okhema, Aglaea who literally put aside her fear of Mydei to accept him as a fellow Chrysos Heir, Aglaea who guided him, Aglaea who modeled transformational leadership for him, Aglaea who gave him the final (if forceful) push he needed to commit to changing his people's future, destroying the bloodstained Kremnos of the past. In all his struggles to move forward, the threads of Aglaea and Gorgo's mirrored ideology lead Mydei through the labyrinth of uncertainty.

All things considered, Gorgo might actually be the character with the single most significant impact on Amphoreus's current plot other than the Trailblazer, because the guidance and beliefs she instilled in Mydei will live much longer than Gorgo and even Aglaea herself--may even live on through the end of the world and the rebirth of all of Amphoreus, because it is her exact ideology that becomes the backbone of Mydei's life advice to Castorice. When Castorice reveals their future, telling him the demigods of today's Amphoreus will become the titans of the new cycle, Mydei looks her in the eye and tells her the exact thing he learned from his mother and Aglaea:

Don't accept defeat--defy despair with everything you have and weave the future with your own two hands.

Perhaps nowhere do we see the parallels between Gorgo and Aglaea more clearly than in the "As I've Written" chapter, where we are told that what ultimately swayed Mydei's decision to join the Flame Chase Journey was when, completely without knowing it, Aglaea spoke the exact same words as his mother.

Though the organization of "As I've Written" is often unclear, making it difficult to determine which passages are actually linked to each other and which are entirely separate, I'm going to personally interpret the quote included in Mydei's third chapter as that special sentence once spoken by both Gorgo and Aglaea:

"The lion has its own historian, and the history of the hunt should not be held by the hunter alone."

Putting aside that all of this is completely impossible in the timeline as we know it (Mydei has no way of remembering the sentences his mother might have spoken to him, and none of the sentences in any flashbacks or her letter to him have anything to do with lions or historians), if this is the line echoed by both women, it is an obviously poignant phrase that would immediately signify to Mydei that Aglaea's ideology matches his mother's.

Although the English translation of "As I've Written" leaves A LOT to be desired (sometimes to the point of being entirely incomprehensible; I legitimately have no idea who okayed those translations, rife as they are with just straight up grammar errors lol), the origin of this phrase is unmistakable. It comes from the African proverb that is normally translated as:

"Until the lion has its own historian, the history of the hunt will always glorify the hunter."

Essentially, "History is written by the victors."

If we take the English translation seriously, what Aglaea and Gorgo would have been saying is that "the defeated" (which, by the way, is symbolized by the lion repeatedly in Kremnos's history) should have their own historian, and that no one should get to speak for them. That is, of course, that no one should get to speak for Mydei except himself--that he should take charge of his own destiny and write his own history into the books.

Krateros repeatedly insists that Mydei is the hunter, the one who should be controlling the whole hunting ground:

But Aglaea sees through Mydei in the first moment of meeting him--sees that he's not the victor but the victim, not the Kremnoan king-to-be but the "wandering lion" who is at risk of being slaughtered on the altar of Kremnos's glory. Kremnos's history is not the "hunting lion"--it's the lion hunt. Gorgo the founder killed the lion, Gorgo the mother killed the lion... So where does that leave Mydei, the symbolic lion?

This line is saying, Aglaea and Gorgo would both have been saying: I see you. I see that there's an entire unspoken legacy weighing on your shoulders, a horror you're fleeing from like wounded prey, a fierce desire in you to refuse the tale this world is writing for you. And in supposedly echoing Gorgo's words, Aglaea would also have echoed the very core of Gorgo's faith:

Those who have lost everything still deserve the chance to shape their own futures.

Those who have faced impossible odds, those who Fate itself has marked for death, those who would martyr themselves to secure the futures of others can and should still rage against the dying of the light, still fight with every tooth and nail to bring about a different ending.

When no one but (apparently) the ghost of Gorgo in his head had ever said it to him, Aglaea told Mydei:

If you want a different history, you can write it.

Of course he joined the Flame Chase Journey after seeing that its leader carries the very same deep-rooted goodness as his mother.

And while we're here talking about the mirrored ideologies and guidance both women have offered to Mydei, I also want to add a tiny aside about Aglaea's symbolic leadership of the other Kremnoans as well.

Although of course Mydei remains their de facto leader even in Okhema, Mydei himself makes a big deal out of the Kremnoans having submitted to Aglaea's authority, repeating in several places that the Kremnoans have a duty to follow her commands.

This isn't an off-hand statement; for someone who should have already been crowned king to state in his own words that his people should submit to someone else's authority is effectively tantamount to ceding his throne specifically to her--Mydei has essentially handed over the reins of Kremnoan leadership to Aglaea. He's the crown prince, but she's effectively the queen (that his mother never got to be). The promotional materials even label Aglaea and Mydei as occupying the same role ("King"). This is especially clear in how the Kremnoans refer to her. In multiple places, Aglaea is referred to as "the golden-haired usurper."

You don't get called a "usurper" unless people believe you're attempting to undermine their current ruler. In all but flat out saying it, the other Kremnoans perceive Aglaea as usurping Mydei's authority, despite Mydei himself willingly giving that power to her. Mydei isn't careless with the Kremnoans' futures, he doesn't shirk his duties as their crown prince, and he certainly would never surrender his power to a weak, unfit ruler. Undoubtedly, Mydei is comfortable with the idea of ceding authority to Aglaea in part because he recognizes his mother in her, sees the qualities that elevated Gorgo to royalty in Kremnos alive and well in Aglaea's Okhema. In this way, perhaps we could say that another factor contributing to Mydei's hesitance to take up Kremnos's throne might be a subconscious sense that the Kremnoans are already in the right hands, that Aglaea--embodying the ideal leadership Mydei projects onto the memory of his mother--is a better fit than he could ever be to lead them anyway?

Heck, while we're at it, I think it's even interesting that the cities of Okhema and Kremnos mirror each other so much, down to things that honestly don't make sense: We're told the legend explaining the lion heads on the walls in Kremnos, but... why are there are also talking lion heads all over Okhema's walls? Gorgo who tore the head off the Tretos lion is echoed in Aglaea, who rules a kinder, softer city still symbolized by the lion, where the talking lion heads get to be gossips and riddle masters instead of war strategists.

Okay, and the last silly thing I want to say: Aglaea would definitely not call herself a mother figure for Mydei, but after 3.2 reveals Gorgo's tough love methods, Aglaea's attempts at scolding him start to look pretty familiar, from her exasperated chiding to her genuine criticism:

Mydei has it tough, having to meet the expectations of women like these lol.

To Fade from the World

Sorry, that was a bit too light-hearted for me, so time to end this post with some more pain:

A final point I think worth comparing between Gorgo and Aglaea is the ultimate fate that both of them face in the story: Gorgo is already gone, but Aglaea is not far behind.

Gorgo's death in particular is treated as abominable. Kremnoans may be warmongers and Strife worshipers, but they're supposed to be honorable about it. Key to their obsession with combat is the idea of noble combat, between contestants who are each given a fair chance. Despite being Gorgo's greatest ally, Krateros does not stand up and join her in her revolt against Eurypon, likely because of that same "might makes right" mindset that shaped so much of Kremnos's decision-making: If Gorgo's cause was truly righteous, then she should have been able to stand up for it herself and win a duel against Eurypon. If it had been a fair contest as expected by Kremnoan cultural standards, then whoever won would have been considered the "correct" person, and no one could have contested the fair results.

But Eurypon's cowardice drove him completely from the path of Kremnos's sacred virtues, causing him to betray their values by betraying his wife, using poison to deny her her fair chance in the duel. This action--forsaking the core tenets of Nikador's divinity--marks the truest extent of Eurypon's downfall, and cements that he is utterly unfit to rule, lacking both the courage to confront his wife in fair combat and the honor to reject under-handed schemes to ensure victory.

Gorgo's death is treated as a tragedy, an act that entirely shapes the course of the story through Mydei's loss to the sea and his subsequent quest for vengeance. It was cowardly betrayal that took away Kremnos's path to a brighter future, locking the self-fulfilling prophecy of Kremnos's downfall into place.

And this, of course, is a perfect mirror to the prophesied end Aglaea is going to face, possibly sooner rather than later. Upon their ascension as demigods, each Chrysos Heir is told how their life will end. Aglaea's prophecy states: "You shall have your final bath in warm and radiant gold."

As Aglaea is most often seen there, the assumption is that she will literally die in the baths--Mydei states this in-game, saying "If a normal person heard that prophecy, they'd probably just stop coming to the baths." Aglaea effectively dismisses this threat (in a very Kremnoan fashion even, lol) by simply saying "Well, who cares? I like baths!" Whatever will be, will be; if her assassin has the strength to end a demigoddess, then truly, it doesn't matter where she goes in Okhema or across the world--fate will find her.

Of course, there's also the possible interpretation that "final bath in gold" refers simply to bathing in her own golden Chrysos Heir blood...

But in either case, the prophecy, Mydei's comments, and some plot leaks I've seen all point towards a violent and unexpected end--likely at the hands of a betrayal.

Like Gorgo, Aglaea will not live to see the world she wished to create, the softer, golden future she wanted to bring to her people. At the hands of her enemies, either facing it with honor or in an unexpected moment of vulnerability, Aglaea will be eliminated before the final hour, fading from Amphoreus's memory as the survivors succeed--or fail--to usher in the new era she sacrificed everything to create.

Although both unique characters on their own, entirely separate from each other, examining Aglaea and Gorgo's parallel plot points, core character traits, and their roles and influences on others throughout the course of the story reveals yet another incredible "echo effect" in Amphoreus's writing, aligning opposites--Okhema and Kremnos, Beauty and Strife--through eerily similar patterns and revealing the enduring thematic threads that bind together the separate portions of Amphoreus's tale.

More than anything, Amphoreus feels to me like a very Hamilton-esque "Who lives, who dies, who tells your story?" plot, one that hinges on the question of who has the power to shape and reshape the future of their world, who has the power to break through a pre-ordained structure and bring about a better end--who has the courage to sacrifice it all to seize the reins of fate itself.

Through Aglaea and Gorgo, the story reinforces a message about women in power, women who perfectly balance violence (the traditional domain of male figures) with love, with beauty, and with righteousness to shake the foundations of their world. In what they value and how they lead, the story mirrors and mirrors again, mise en abyme, the message that those who are willing to give it all for the greater good are the true crafters of our story.

(Perhaps all this is preparing for the presence of another woman, one just as willing or more to do all that must be done to usher in a brighter future for her world?)

The history of the hunt should not be held by the hunter alone.

The lion has its own historian--and so too does the lioness.

Although Gorgo and Aglaea will both fall before that golden Era Nova can be achieved, the marks they have left on Amphoreus's plot, through their legacies of defiance and grace picked up and carried, torch-like, by other characters, demonstrate just how central both women were to all that happened in the world's past and all that will happen in its future.

#honkai star rail #aglaea #gorgo #mydei's mother #amphoreus #character analysis #hsr meta #this is the post I had mentioned starting a while ago #and ended up with a bit of a sour taste in my mouth over the hsr fandom #but then thinking about Aglaea and Gorgo revived my love #so fuck it we ball #two absolute queens #and the story makes a fantastic mirror image #of vastly different characters whose hearts are well aligned #Mydei's relationship with Aglaea is very precious to me #SHE WAS AFRAID OF HIM #and he's just like “I wish my mom was still alive so she could rule our country like you rule yours” T_T #like ma'am #that's your secret self-appointed mentee you had no idea was idolizing you and taking notes on your leadership #I wish we had gotten to see any of this in the game #Mydei's efforts to be more Aglaea-like for his own people lol #I'm also still laughing to myself #over the fact that Krateros clearly worshiped the ground Gorgo walked on #and then is like “AGLAEA IS THE WORST”#Sir???#that's the Okheman version of your grown ass man crush???#“It's Okheman so it's bad by default!!” >:[#I loved writing this post #but holy shit was it cursed #tumblr drafts died on me and lost half the text and half the images like THREE times DDD;

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milkbobatyun · 8 months ago

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an eye for an eye

pairing: jiaoqiu x gn!reader

genre: angst

summary: the two of you were always bitter enemies, ever since you were young. but feelings change over time, and you made the greatest sacrifice because of it.

word count: 2.2k

a/n: i have finally gotten around to editing and now posting the pt 2 of save your tears!! to the people who were requesting this, i hope this is up to your expectations ૮₍˶Ó﹏Ò ⑅₎ა

you remembered now.

your rivalry started when the two of you were fresh-faced students, attending the ranzhi school in hopes of becoming the top healer.

jiaoqiu and you had opposing views, often clashing in heated debates in class. the two of you were like fire and water, fighting tooth and nail to rip the position of no. 1 on the exam billboard from each other. every exam, the title of no. 1 bounced between the two of you.

you detested jiaoqiu’s sly smirk, his teasing voice every time he scored higher or was praised by the teacher. every self-satisfied smile made your fists clench, nails digging into your skin. his proud mannerisms made you want to both punch his face in and bash your head against a wall.

yet what you hated the most was how his sly remarks made your heart dance in its cage, tomato red saturating the tips of your ears when you made eye contact.

jiaoqiu hated your quiet presence, how his eyes would search for you every time he entered a room. your arrogant presence ruffled his fur. your quiet, studious presence made his fur prickle with irritation. whenever the teacher affirmed your comment and you sent an arrogant smirk in his direction, jiaoqiu wanted to claw his own eyes out.

what jiaoqiu despised the most was how his heart would speed up every time he saw you, ears pricking up with interest when he heard your voice.

every class was a battle, the other students only watching in silent mortification as you and jiaoqiu battled with medical terms and theories, words clashing like swords, relentless and unstoppable, each seeking to deliver the final blow.

the climax of your rivalry was during a class discussion, when the teacher posed the hypothetical question–what was the best treatment for someone who had drunk tumbleweed poison?

a hand shot up in the air.

“an eye for an eye. find a willing participant to donate their eyes.” you spoke, confidence and certainty clear in your voice.

the teacher’s remark is cut off by a hand slamming into the table.

“ridiculous. who has ever heard of such a thing?” jiaoqiu jumped up, fur bristling in every direction, ears flattened in anger and pointing an accusatory finger at you. “who would ever want to sacrifice their own sight for someone else? i say that medicine to slow down the poison and its effects is the best method, there is no known cure for tumbleweed poisoning.”

as expected, the debate between the two of you lasts long, the sun’s pale yellow rays deepen into a warm golden, sun sliding further down the horizon, before the bell tinkles in the distance, signifying the end of the class.

it was ironic, that was the last debate that you had with jiaoqiu before your graduation. after, you both went your separate ways. sometimes, you found yourself missing the cunning foxian, with his smiling eyes that held something more.

jiaoqiu often found himself wondering what you were up to, his thoughts drifting to you when he drank a tea you had once mentioned to your friends. he missed your arrogant presence, with the quiet studious nature drawing all his attention every time he entered a room.

he habitually visited your herb store, tail and ears twitching with amusement as he pushed your buttons. he could see the vein throbbing in your neck, how you would clench your hands on the tabletop, a forced polite smile carved onto your face. a similarly sly grin was reflected on jiaoqiu’s.

when the war broke out, you sometimes wondered if jiaoqiu would be safe, after all, he was the healer for the merlin’s claw, the frontlines was his second home.

while he treated feixiao, jiaoqiu often found his thoughts wandering to you. would you have used a different herb to treat her? or would you have used a completely different method? he found himself almost missing the heated debates and the thrill it gave him, his heart beating faster, tail swishing in excitement.

the sound of the door opening awakens jiaoqiu.

sunlight warmed his body, as he lay in his bed, resting, according to the doctor’s orders.

though his sight had been stolen by the poison, he knows where everything is, the memories and layout etched into his brain.

“jiaoqiu,” feixiao called from the doorway. the mentioned foxian’s ears swivel atop his head, turning his face in the direction he hoped feixiao was standing. “i’ve brought someone to help you regain your sight. we’ll come in now.”

two sets of footsteps pattered across the wooden floors, before stopping at the side of the bed.

“so,” jiaoqiu begins. “who is this mysterious doctor who can cure me?”

“we started on the wrong foot before, jiaoqiu,” your voice floated through the air. “but i believe i can heal you.” you spoke quietly, voice wavering with nervousness.

though jiaoqiu couldn’t see, your eyes were flitting around the room, desperate to focus on anything but the foxian in front of you. your fingers were busy, picking at the bandage wrapped around your hand, from when the shard of porcelain sliced into your hand.

despite his sight being taken away, jiaoqiu’s ears could still recognise the voice of his rival during his student days and the person who he had rudely thrown the teacup at. his body stiffened, tail swishing in agitation and anxiety.

he suddenly recalled that he never apologised for his previous outburst. guilt flashed across his face, though he was quick to quash it down. his eyebrows furrowed, fists gripping the blanket underneath his hand.

jiaoqiu could imagine you, standing next to feixiao, proud and arrogant, like how you were in your youth. now, you had more reason to gloat. you had the upper hand in this moment.

the silence fell heavily between the three of you, feixiao’s brows knitted together, her sharp eyes noticed how you silently winced next to her, face turning more guilty than you were before you walked closer to jiaoqiu.

“feixiao, if you’ve come to taunt me with false hope, bringing along the person i least want to see, you can leave.” jiaoqiu’s voice cuts through the silence, definate in his decision.

you take a hesitant step forwards, stretching out a hand, worry and despair that jiaoqiu can’t see reflecting all on your face.

“stay away from me.” jiaoqiu growls, baring his teeth in your direction. “have you come to mock me again? to rub it in my face that i can’t be the top healer anymore?” spite and hate drip from his voice, like poison.

no, that's not what he meant. he was supposed to apologise, but this, sharp words that only served to harm people, came more naturally, especially with you.

you flinch, snatching your hand back, trying to stop the trembling in your hands. your hands tightened its grasp on your medicine box, knuckles turning white.

feixiao sighed, exasperated at the childish nature of her healer.

“jiaoqiu,” she spoke firmly. “if you want to be able to heal me in the future, then you need your sight back. i know you had history with [name], in fact, i heard about what happened last time, but they’re the only one right now who has a shred of hope in saving your sight.”

hearing feixiao’s reasoning, the fight left jiaoqiu’s body like a deflating balloon.

with an annoyed exhalation, jiaoqiu could only obediently nod his head in agreement.

settling your medicine box onto the mahogany bedside table, you began unpacking your instruments, while explaining the procedure to jiaoqiu and feixiao.

“i’m sure you remember, jiaoqiu, the proposed theory i had about how to treat tumbleweed poison.”

“an eye for an eye.” jiaoqiu echoed, the corners of his mouth twitching in amusement as he remembered the memory.

“indeed.” you affirmed, nodding your head.

with a shaky breath in, you picked up the right instruments, beginning the procedure.

when jiaoqiu awoke, the weak morning rays filtered through the window, shining upon his blankets. jiaoqiu marvelled at the success of your operation, drinking in the sights of his familiar abode. he glanced around. the traces of feixiao’s presence were clear, an empty chair pulled up beside his bed, her coat thrown over a chair and her weapon propped up against the wall.

slipping out of bed, jiaoqiu exited his bedroom, expecting to see you at any moment, ready to gloat to him about your genius and how you were better than him in medicinal skill.

yet the house was oddly silent, no life present, the only sound the soft patter of his slippered feet hitting the wooden floor.

confused on where the guests were, he made his way outside, the spray of the sea air sprinkling against his skin.

he saw the back of your figure, whispering something close to feixiao’s ear. the roar of the waves drowned out your voices, not even jiaoqiu’s sensitive ears could pick up what you were muttering.

feixiao noticed jiaoqiu’s lurking presence, glancing at him with surprise and a hint of worry in her eyes. with a curt final message, feixiao left the two of you, throwing a departing glare of warning at jiaoqiu.

pausing by jiaoqiu’s shoulder, feixiao muttered to him a word of warning.

“be mindful of what you say to [name] and be gentle with your words.” feixiao hissed.

jiaoqiu dismissed her words with a shrug of his shoulders, annoyance present on his face. he was the patient, so why was feixiao being so nice to the healer?

with purpose in his step, jiaoqiu stalked towards you.

the tap tap of footsteps drawing closer behind you alerted you to a presence behind you, a simple deduction telling you it was most likely jiaoqiu.

“so,” jiaoqiu’s silky tone broke through the din. “how do you feel, o mighty healer?”

his voice dropped with mockery, a sly smile cruelly curving his mouth.

“i feel the same.” your curt voice was indifferent, not turning to look at jiaoqiu.

his fur bristled in annoyance. the fight in your voice, always present when you talked to him, was gone and it unnerved him.

“which unfortunate individual did you scam, to trade their eyesight for mine?” jiaoqiu pressed on, hoping for some sort of reaction from you. anger, glee, smugness, it mattered not to him, your lack of emotion put him on edge.

silence.

“i’m talking to you.” jiaoqiu growled. “at least look at me.”

only the splash waves answered his question.

jiaoqiu marched towards you, placing a heavy hand on your shoulder and turning you around to face him.

almost in slow motion, you turned, the white bandages falling away from your face.

the howl of the wind fell silent, the whole world holding its breath. jiaoqiu’s breath caught in his throat, his thoughts scattering like startled birds, words faltering on his tongue. a numbing shock swept over him, rendering him frozen.

jiaoqiu’s sharp eyes met yours. they were once so full of life and fire, now clouded over with milky white, sight stolen. his heart dropped in his chest, all the mockery and sarcasm ripped out of him.

the final remanants of arrogance melted from his tone, leaving only disbelief and pity. his ears flattened against his head, as he stared at the bandages.

“you–” jiaoqiu’s voice cracked. “why?” he breathed. “why give your eyes away? to me, of all people?”

your lips twisted into a wry smile. “love makes people do stupid things, jiaoqiu.” you whispered, sadness saturating your voice. where tears used to form, beads of scarlet began to pool, threatening to spill over.

jiaoqiu’s sharp tongue, always ready to retort, was rendered useless, staring helplessly at the person in front of him, pale eyes gazing somewhere beyond him, a once fierce rival, reduced to a broken and selfless person.

jiaoqiu’s throat tightened, reaching out his hand, hovering near your shoulder. an overwhelming sorrow ate away in his chest, guilt gnawing at his insides.

“why didn’t you tell me?” he asked, voice flooding with confusion and hurt.

you laughed, a hollow sound, laced with upset. “you wouldn’t have let me, if you had known.”

jiaoqiu’s ears flattened in shame, his lips pressed into a thin line. he knew, he would’ve argued with you, hell, even fought with you if he could see. but now, it was too late.

“you know, i never really hated you,” your voice broke through the silence, bloody tears trailing down your cheeks. “no, wait, i did, at the start, i really did hate you, with a burning passion.” you let out another sorrowful laugh. “but somewhere along the line, the hate, it turned to love.”

jiaoqiu’s breath caught, all those years of rivalry, it was something more, something simmering beneath the surface, just out of reach, something neither of you wanted to admit.

he wanted to say something, do anything, reach out and wipe your tears, perhaps, but his words and his body weren’t listening, he was frozen. his hand still suspended in mid-air. the weight of everything left unsaid hung between the two of you.

“i’m sorry,” he finally exhaled, voice raw with emotion, regret, barely audible in the wind. “maybe one day, if you wish, no, if you could ever forgive me, would you still give me a chance?”

deep down, he knew, it would be a long time, but he would wait for you, no matter how long.

taglist (open): @leehanscorydora, @pastelmitzuki

∧,,,∧ ( ̳• · • ̳) © curated with love by milkbobatyun 2024 / づ ♡

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seirindono · 11 months ago

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TMS - Author's note (Arc 1)

Today I'm stepping up to talk about TMS for a while. It's going to be a lot of blah blah, no TLDR, so hang in there or save it for later if you're brave enough, haha (¯▿¯)

So, another chapter of TMS draws to a close, with the difference that this time it's a whole saga that's coming to an end! That's a big relief for me, given that we recently celebrated the comic's 4th anniversary! That's almost the entire duration of my college life, and that's both an impressive and terrifying achievement lol.

The comic is divided into 3 arcs, each separated by an interlude. The first runs from part 1 to 8, with 201 pages total (wow!). In it, you are introduced to Mel, a young skeleton with a rather unclear past, who accidentally arrives in a a foreign timeline, along with other well known skeletons. Nowadays it's just an isekai haha. Throughout the arc, she proves to be a cautious Monster, quiet and somewhat withdrawn compared to the other skeletons we come across, notably Rus, Blue and Axe, who each got their own sequences.

Still, Mel in the last few scenes is starting to show more initiative, and the interlude will make this even more obvious, but we can expect her to open up a lot more during the next Arc, about her past, motives, goals and thoughts.

I could go on at length about what's in store for us in the interlude, but given that it's due for release sometime in 2024, I'm going to talk about the general story line instead. Although we follow Mel who is foreign to what's going on in this universe prior to her arrival, the other characters and events suggest that strange phenomena are taking place in Ebott, leading many people to become embroiled in a highly unusual affair. Crossing timelines, earthquakes, mysterious apparitions in the forest, something is afoot and the situation seems to be at a turning point when Mellow gets here.

Everyone has their own way of dealing with the situation and what to do next. Some are serious and pragmatic, like Black, others optimistic, like Blue, and others, like Papyrus, find themselves completely backed into a corner, forced to do their best to fix whatever needs to be.

A special case, however, is Axe, whom Mel meets in the forest as she investigates Mt. Ebott. The two have diametrically opposed views of their current condition. One wants to return to her world by any means necessary, regardless of the advantages of a peaceful world. The other, not so much. Both refuse to talk about their past and ignore the other's circumstances, but a sense of familiarity drives them to try to convince the other to stay or go. These are two stark positions to reconcile, and while we can expect Blue and the other skeletons to have their own views on the subject too, Mel and Axe are strangely "committed" in this interraction and resort to violence, spurred on by a unknown substance that causes Axe to momentarily lose control.

Mel is wounded, Axe unconscious, and the status quo disrupted. Other consequences follow this confrontation, and several questions are raised: Can Blue really help Mel when Axe accuses him of having already given up on going home himself? What is this mysterious entity Axe came across a few days earlier? The vibrations? What was that substance that made him go berserk? And what made him stop? Can we trust Mel and what she tells us? And many others.

Because as I'm sure many of you have come to realize, Mel has proven to be a rather unreliable narrator (or at least character since you don't follow her actual POV). Blatantly lying or omitting facts to others and readers alike, it's hard to know her next move and whether she's genuinely forgotten important infos (for it's well established at this stage that she has hazy memories and that they continue to deteriorate. The same applies to her health).

In the same way, each part of TMS so far has raised more questions than it has answered, but I can confidently say that the road is paved for Arc 2 to answer and put in perspective most of them, ahah.

Ah, this is also the moment when I can announce that ALL skeletons will be featured in the Interlude. Should be. Hopefully.

I'd also like to point out a few narrative changes for Act 2! The central characters, in particular. Original cast characters such as Undyne, Metatton and a veiled character will be more formally introduced, but we'll also meet up with characters we've already bumped into, but in a much more concrete way, such as Frisk and Alphys. I can't wait for you to get to know them! You can also expect more pov changes, more elipses and so on. Things are moving fast.

But that begs the question. When is it due? As said before, the first Arc lasted 4 years and I'm entering my last (and most crucial) year of college. I still don't know if I'll have time to get much of it done in 2025, but on the other hand, I'd like to strike while the iron's hot lest TMS be discontinued after a 1-year hiatus and my entry into the working world. Student loan, life and all. There are still plenty of things I'd like to bring to this project, and I now have the skills to actually carry them out, but on the other hand, the time involved has also increased exponentially.

Tbh with you, as an animation student, it's been one of my dreams since 2020 to do one of TMS's sequences in animatic or full anim, or even a trailer for the comic! But as a solo team, it's just unreasonable and I know it. But the parasite ----. Don't get me wrong, I could, but it would take me months and it's just not realistic when 80% of my time has to go into professionnal work that goes into my portefolio or adult stuff. I can't affort to invest time in solo-ing it or to recruit and lead a team over one side project of mine ( ´ ▿ ` ) So we'll most likely stick to classic pages.

But the same goes for collabs, community events, side stories, asks, edits, dubs, testing other platforms, regular animatics. Love all of that. Really. But I never have the time to because, man, I'd love to actually finish TMS someday ahah. It all comes back to the age-old problem of “lots of ideas, little time”, and it's so frustrating but, it's a choice I have to stick to, so bear with me as I vent my frustration. Just for tonight (´ ∀ `, *)

So, yes. Act 2. Next year? Probably? It's a long interlude, so you'll get smth in the meantime, but it's likely to decide the future of TMS and whether Act 2 sees the light of day as I imagine it or if...well, something else replaces it.

bringing back this doodle cuz it seems fiting lol

Anyway, I also wanted to thank you for your engagement with Part 8!

I don't know how other comic artists experience it, but for me it's a very isolated work, and as much as I love working alone, I enjoy the interaction with readers most of all.

Seeing people losing their mind over a serious scene, or chuckling at a dumb gag, or just simping over the characters and art. It's just great, and very rewarding. Likewise, I have a blast answering questions about the TMS universe, reading tags and receiving memes, witnessing people go increasingly mad with messages full of indecipherable screams and hearts. Makes me giggle and kick my feet everytime and I can't wait to drop the next lore bomb or funny scene bwahahah

And while we're on the subject, I'd like to say a special word of thanks to the legions of rebloggers who make it their business to spread the word about TMS. You sweet, lovely, candy scented folks. And to my dear mutuals - with whom I interact objectively so little - who have no idea how a single message or note from them drives me bonkers. Thanks for dropping by. And of course to my super Patreons who support me despite the sparse updates, but to whom I'm more than grateful. Love you all.

Sounds like a farewell message. It's not lol. Just making sure they get the love they deserve.

The post is getting long and I'm kind of done pretending I know how to write organized notes so to wrap things up, here's an exhaustive list of what I'd like to get done this year and/or discuss in more detail another day. •Make a new masterpost (for Act 2) •Analyze/Comment certain sequences from Act 1 to clarify or give context •Redraw and rewrite part 1 and 2 •Make more bonus content again *ahahahahahaha*

•Re open or close the Discord (partially abandoned and it's all on me, but I'm still mulling it over).

•Finish the Interlude and enjoy and nice hiatus

And that's about it? Congratulation for reading this and making it this far! You were there!

Be well, and see you next time.

Seirin-

First part | Prev | Next (INTERLUDE)

Ko-fi | Patreon | Comic | Commissions | To support the comic

#txt #seirin talks #the missing scarf #author's note #lots of rambling but that's what those are for aren't they #a day to celebrate wo~hooo #this is a save point if you're reading the comics - take a break

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yourstardarling · 1 year ago

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Beauty Is Intimidating

I was thinking about this earlier, that beauty creates a lot of mixed reactions in people. There is no one way to define beauty and what is deemed beautiful is personal interpretation. What I have noticed though is that oftentimes people who look good can easily intimidate other people. Their beauty creates a barrier that makes it hard sometimes for them to be approached. Like in popular Highschool movies for example, beautiful people are often seen as untouchable. They hold a lot more power than others and only other beautiful people can easily be around them.

The reason I brought this up is because it made me wonder about the nature of beauty. What better planet to look at than beauty herself, Venus. Venus the planet of love, femininity and beauty rules over the way we view attraction in our lives. However, the nature of Venus is to face scrutiny and conflict for her beauty. Her signs are opposing forces that don’t like Venuses beauty.

Taurus & Scorpio: This first axis shows the point that beauty will often cause intimidation. People who are beautiful have a way of bringing up the shadows of other people. They are ideally secure within themselves and their appearance. This in turn creates an effect where they’ll face scrutiny for others insecurities. “I wish I had hair like hers” “Why aren’t my arms as muscular as his” This demonstrates how beauty, will bring about underlying feelings of others to light. It can garner jealousy and envy for your appearance. So the intimidation itself does not come from the attractive person, but from the insecurities others may have inside. It’s a feeling of unworthiness to even talk to someone they believe looks better than them. Oftentimes people make the assumption that a beautiful person won’t like to talk to them. Sometimes if these feelings are not evaluated, it can cause deep emotional resentment towards good looking people.

Libra & Aries: This next axis shows us how beauty can often cause conflictions within other people. Beautiful people are susceptible to face hatred for their appearance. A lot of aggression can be thrown towards them just for the fact they look good. With the Aries influence on Libra, people will want to physically fight them. Some have faced bullying and harassment growing up which motivated them to improve their appearance. At the same time beautiful people can easily get other people to fight for them. Like Helen of Troy, a whole war was waged in her name because she was considered the most beautiful women in her time. So beauty here becomes a form of protection, which intimidates others from messing with you. However, the air sign nature of Libra shows how conflict will instead arise in the form of gossip. A lot of rumors can be made about them, which are usually lower Aries quality traits, such as being a b*tch, explosive, mean and narcissistic. For example, my friend has been told multiple times that other people thought she looked mean so they did not approach her. When in reality, she's a goofball and is far from being mean. Beauty here creates intimidation, by people either wanting to fight you or stay away in fear of being attacked by you.

Pisces & Virgo: This axis is between Venus’s exaltation and fall placements. In Pisces, Venus love knows no bounds, they are able to find beauty in everything and everyone. Virgo though reminds us of what beauty means in our society. It signifies facing constant scrutiny. Instead of being loved for their whole being, beautiful people will often face a lot criticism on their looks. They will get shamed for any slight changes in their appearance such as their weight, face and complexion. Criticism on why they are wearing this outfit, why does their hair look like this and a need to bring them down for not being perfect. Pisces reminds us that this is a reflection of what you find imperfect within yourself. The beautiful person is just mirroring the insecurities in other people. That is why you can find something within them to always critique because it’s the criticism you have about yourself. The exaltation of Pisces teaches us to let go of trying to pay attention to every little detail about other’s appearance. Instead it's about appreciating the whole, which includes the fact that they are a regular person. There is so much more to them than just their physical looks. A reminder that before making all these assumptions about them, it is important to get to know who they are behind the mask.

______

This is just my theory and observation on beauty. So next time people think you’re unapproachable and scary, just know it’s probably because you’re so sexy 😏. Lmfao, hope yall enjoyed.

- Your Star Darling

#astro thoughts #astro notes #astro community #Taurus #Libra #Pisces #Venusians

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girl4music · 1 month ago

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Bangel and Spuffy: Natural VS forced progression in developing romantic/more than platonic relationships.

You have 2 character dynamics in a TV show that frequently interact with each other to the point where they bond and develop into a relationship that becomes romantic or more than platonic. But the question is how do you have those relationships progress from a writing perspective? Do you let those 2 character dynamics bond and develop romantically or more than platonically through the respective narrative naturally or do you try to force that respective narrative around those 2 characters so they can progress romantically or more than platonically?

These 2 character dynamics are Buffy and Angel (Bangel) and Buffy and Spike (Spuffy). One character dynamic was intentionally written and portrayed to be romantic from the start of the show and one just sort of ended up that way through an episode where them being romantic was played for laughs. Yet the former feels forced and the latter feels natural. It really should be the other way around if one romantic relationship was intentional and the other one wasn’t. However… I say this is why it isn’t. I personally believe that it comes down to not understanding what a “relationship” consists of and is defined by. It comes down to fantasy VS reality or idealism VS realism.

When a relationship is a real relationship it comes with the ups and downs, rights and wrongs and hards and eases. It is constantly a fluctuation of positives and negatives and what makes the relationship stand the test of time is being able to navigate that constant fluctuation and still provide for each other whatever is necessary to overcome obstacles in the individual and in the ship.

This means that a real relationship is about much more than romance and love and therefore when you ONLY depict the romance and love in that relationship when there’s so much going on with them and around them, it can come across as fake or possibly performative. It can come across as forced. It might not be the intention for it to come across this way but that’s what can be perceived out of it anyway because you’re not getting the full picture of what you should have to understand that it is a real relationship. You're not getting the foundation or the grounding. It simply does not feel like a naturally progressed ship because it has no stability or consistency. It looks right on the surface but deep down is wrong.

Then there’s the opposite of this where you do get to see everything that you should be able to see to understand 2 characters are in a real relationship but they refuse to acknowledge it as one in the narrative out of… I don’t know… Bias? Judgement? Animosity? Anger? Fear? You can see that the bond and development is natural even though there’s still so much going on with and around those 2 characters. You can see that they provide for each other everything that they should if they were to actually be a couple and not just something to laugh at because the notion of them being a couple seems absurd. That character dynamic nevertheless naturally progresses into romantic or more than platonic because it looks and feels right as opposed to if it was intentionally forced to be that way.

This is how I personally view and interpret Bangel and Spuffy.

I’m not saying the character dynamics aren’t useful or beneficial in some way to the storytelling of both ‘BtVS’ and ‘AtS’. I’m just saying that one feels forced to be romantic and the other feels like it isn’t. And - for me - it comes down to the dichotomy of fantasy/idealism or reality/realism. Bangel and Spuffy fall into this stark dichotomy.

Buffy and Angel are a whirlwind romance. Much of what they like (or love) in each other is just an ideal for them. It’s based in a fantasy and in a mystery and the moment where that becomes explored it no longer feels right because the fantasy and mystery has just suddenly vanished and neither wants to work hard to devote themselves and their lives to each other because it’s so empty when it’s real as opposed to when it’s fantasy and the pleasure and peace of it is replaced with pain and trauma and neither character is good for the other. Even though they don’t oppose each other for the most part… there is still so much tension and conflict there. There is still so much that really damages each other and they don’t know how to work through it to heal those damages because they don’t understand each other enough to realize what is damaging them and to provide for each other what is necessary for them to move the obstacles in their way as individuals and as a ship. They can’t be happy for both plot reasons and honestly… because there’s no compatibility there at all. Their dynamic doesn’t work without it being forced to and therefore it comes across as if it’s a performance… and when the cameras stop rolling and the audience leaves they go back to being basically strangers that don’t know and don’t care to know each other. It’s like they just go back to their individual worlds in their individual TV shows as if they never even fucking met. There’s like only one scene past Season 4 where their interaction does anything for them as individual people and that’s only because they’ve decided to be friends, and aside from some kissing, are not forced to be more. I get more out of that one little scene with them than I do in the entirety of their dynamic together as lovers.

Buffy and Spike are a slow burn enemies-to-lovers more than platonic relationship. Much of what they like (or don’t like) in each other already exists in the respective individual character and therefore very often mirror-reflects whenever they interact with each other - showing them who they truly are as people even if they cannot face that truth in themselves. They naturally progress with each other even when opposing each other because they both share the same dark/light nature and refuse to acknowledge it in themselves. Their dynamic is so full of substance and depth and insight. It’s not empty whatsoever either as mortal enemies, friends or lovers. In a lot of ways their bond and their development is their actual love relationship because it goes through so much that tells us so much about both the individual characters and their dynamic. They work well romantically or more than platonically because they provide for each other what is necessary to help each other overcome obstacles individually and in the ship even though there’s so much complication. They don’t treat each other very well for much of their interactions together but you understand why this is and you can see that they would have a future together if they allowed each other to feel everything between them rather than push it all aside out of… obligation to, safety of or pressure from their friends/sociality. Their relationship is real because it involves all that it should to depict a real relationship. It’s not a fantasy. It’s not something that’s forced. It naturally feels right and when the people are able to get out of their own heads, it’s a wonderful thing to see them let down their guards to be just themselves. To see them be happy with each other without losing their identities in the process.

When you can provide one ship with all the tools for that and they still can’t work it out and the other with the bare bones and they somehow work it out anyway… I think it’s very clear which ship is not only the natural progression, but is also meant to develop romantically or more than platonically. When it comes to writing progression of a relationship, you must look into who these people are individually and how they can understand each other as people before you can develop their dynamic romantically or more than platonically otherwise it will feel very forced. It will come across as if they’re playing a role and you may say “well that’s because they are because their fictional characters in a TV show”... but you’re not supposed to feel that when you watch them. If you do feel that, then something’s wrong and they don’t really work as a ship at all. They may work so that they can learn from each other individually but they’re not meant to be in a romance because they don’t know how to maintain that romance. They don’t know how to commit to or even tolerate each other and they’re not even the mortal enemies.

This is what it comes down to with Bangel and Spuffy:

Bangel are great for individual development for both characters. For growing on their own and in their own right as people and I really enjoy what I can learn from them in that way. They are watchable in that respect. Spuffy are great for a dynamic that have a romance together because no matter what they go through - they’re there for each other and by each other’s side through the storm… and even if the storm is created by each other - they somehow eventually find a way to make it out of all the damage that they can inflict because they understand each other in ways that they don’t even really understand themselves with and therefore can naturally fall into a progression of caring and trust and intimacy and love and the only thing that’s really in their way (whilst also being their gravitation to each other) is their respective natures which they instinctively deny and defy because they feel a mutual burning flame between them that’s inevitable and unyielding that could ironically kill them both and yet also make them feel so very alive at the same time. There is such poetry in Spuffy as a ship because it’s always full of potential. It’s compelling to watch. Bangel on the other hand is like reading a bedtime story. It’s nice and safe but in the end you just fall asleep from it. They look great together. They sound great together. But there is nothing really there with them. No foundation. No grounding. It’s like watching fairytale characters that think and believe that they’re meant to be together as their one true loves or soulmates but they don’t have a clue how to make that togetherness a reality. An actual formable, physical, tangible, solid relationship. Maybe that’s the draw for some people in supernatural/fantasy storytelling but it isn’t for me because that's fundamentally not what is love to me. Love is constant hard work. Love is beating and besting the odds. Love is being there when no one else will or when no one knows they should be. Love is sacrifice and compromise. Love is understanding each other in ways where you can stay silent and they instinctively know what to do for you even when they don’t necessarily know how to be good to you… or in Spike’s case… be good in general.

At the end of the day… natural will always trump forced in everything. Be it in art/entertainment or in real life. Now I’m not a fictional writer so I don't write characters or relationships myself. I merely only critique on already conceived fictional characters and relationships... but I have some advice as an observer. It’s the same advice (more of a plea) I always use when it comes to talking about TV art/entertainment storytelling and representation: Please do not wrap the characters around the narrative. Please wrap the narrative around the characters. I promise you it's better because all of what I've just written comes into the why and the how. When you force characters to wrap around a specific narrative, they will have a forced progression. When you naturally wrap a narrative around specific characters, it will have a natural progression because it is specifically created and tailored to them as individuals and a ship. It's meant for them as the characters that they are individually and the character dynamic that they have together. They will naturally bond and develop into a romantic or more than platonic relationship if you let the narrative intertwine with who they are and what they do individually and as a ship. I have more than enough proof that this is true in watching Xena and Gabrielle - who were never meant to be romantic or more than platonic either but just worked best that way and those characters do really show you what love and devotion is without having to explicitly confirm them as being in a romance and that is far more valuable than something contrived to be a romance.

#buffy the vampire slayer #buffy and angel #anti-bangel #buffy and spike #spuffy #buffy summers #sarah michelle gellar #angel #david boreanaz #spike #james marsters #forced progression #natural progression #character dynamics #character representation #character development

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cirrup · 3 months ago

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*cocks gun* My friend was asking me for writing ideas for a Bingyuan enemies to lovers and now i feel like god, so you are going to SUFFER for a sec.

Okay, so, Yue Qingyuan and Luo Binghe being the emperors of two rival empires who've always managed to keep each other in check, even thought throughout the centuries, one side has attempted to take over the other, and the other always successfully pushes back, so stalemate.

One day, that changes when, among each other harems, one member is able to catch their eye in SOME way, and it isn't long before this emperor's are under these concubines little fingers.

UNTIL ONE DAY. The concubines successfully throw their revolts, usurp them, and now both YQY and LBH are the concubines/war prize of the new Shen emperors, who immediately after taking their thrones, unified the empire, making it one huge, impossibly powerful unit that has become the nightmare of all the neightborhood realms.

SJ and SY were both slave children under the same noble household, and for the longest time it was believed that the twin emperors were actually the same person, because their faces aside, they were both cold, ruthless, cruel and incredibly competent at their jobs, unlike the previous emperors who were unaware just how bad things were getting around them.

There's no "nicer" twin or one who is overprotective; really, the only difference, which is only visible in private, is that SY is far quicker to jump to conclusions with little information while SJ lets it marinated for a while, and that SY has the absolute best poker face in his history, while SJ will always betray his true feelings in some way, whether it is a twitching eyebrow or trembling hand. Both twins have found ways to work around these differences to the point people really can't tell them apart.

all except for their new war prizes, who seem VERY keen in learning all their microexpressions, once the inital humiliation and anger is replaced with curiosity.

Ooo you know what I do love this take on Shen twins. Love to see them getting to be a terrifying force on the world.

There’s also now the delightful path of then getting to draw comparisons between YQY and Binghe. Almost like an inverse of the twins re: twins started out being viewed as very similar to their strengths becoming distinct mirrored by YQY and Binghe being viewed as opposing forces and slowly having more similarities show me between the two of them through their growing affection for the twins. Wow what a fun time for everyone

#please no guns in the kitchen actually we are trying to cook in here #svsss #shen yuan #shen qingqiu #luo binghe #yue qingyuan #svsss au #asks #highladyofstoriesansmusic ask

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juperder · 5 months ago

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rambles about the g-man and his connection with adrian shephard, because a recent conversation with a friend had me thinking about it

something hardly anyone ever mentions is that, while we call him "the g-man," his name is never actually dropped across the games. however, adrian himself has referred to him as a "g-man," the slang term for government man or FBI agent

what's interesting about this is that "g-man" as slang is rarely used today nor at the time of the black mesa incident, and especially not something any of the major characters in opposing force would say. it's like, thirties slang, being used by a twenty-two-year-old marine.

it might not mean anything, but i like to look at it as a little insight into adrian's personality, as even these diary entries written by him don't give us a lot to work with.

the tutorial chapter of opposing force shows us that g-man was making the rounds around the boot camp adrian was at,

it seems g-man was arguing for adrian's spot on the advanced training list, likely to prime him for indoor combat inside black mesa

the thing is, this was two months before the resonance cascade happened. why would g-man have done all this if he didn't consider adrian a critical resource? it was because adrian was his initially his primary candidate. he was the original "gordon freeman" in a sense

you can sort of see this in the contrast between g-man sightings between both games, as in half-life's beginning chapters, g-man is typically observing gordon from a casually approachable distance, like behind a door or from a catwalk gordon is able to cross

^ this is after the resonance cascade, adrian hasn't been deployed yet

as gordon is forced back underground by the presence of the HECU, g-man's sightings have become much more distant and sporadic

^ this is around the same time that adrian regains consciousness after his osprey crashed. gordon is much closer to xen by this point

why is this important? it shows a shift in g-man's demeanor the moment that gordon gains a reputation among the other survivors, meanwhile adrian is left behind on the surface, g-man doing the bare minimum to ensure he doesn't step out of line.

^ this is after gordon has become a hot ticket item. note that g-man is not trying to be discreet at all here lol

i believe g-man's physical distance between a potential hire can signify their value as an asset to him, with g-man becoming harder to reach once he takes interest in somebody, potentially in order to prevent himself from distracting them or inspiring them to get closer.

the speech g-man gives at the end of opposing force also has some interesting implications about how he views adrian

think about how g-man makes you, the player, feel. the answer you get will depend on who you ask, but most often you see people say they become curious, uncertain, or even just weirded out.

now, think about someone like gordon or even alyx here. people who at a glance, are just that; ordinary people. g-man speaks to them individually, with either emotional appeal or appeal to rationale.

g-man is awfully formal with gordon, much as his superiors at black mesa were. g-man also gives gordon something that he's rarely had over the course of the game's plot, that being a choice. he is allowed to refuse the offer of employment, even if doing so would be a guaranteed death. and canonically, gordon did accept the offer.

the difference between adrian and gordon's survival to g-man is that, despite his success in combat, gordon was hardly ever trained in it. gordon freeman is the everyman. this makes him easier to grasp, given that g-man can generally assume what gordon would want based on his quality of life. with this in mind, here me out:

adrian is unpredictable by being predictable. think about it,

adrian shephard is a combat soldier. he signed on, aware of the kind of situations he would be getting himself into, and he made it out of black mesa alive. all according to g-man's original plan, right? wrong.

people enlist in the military for many reasons. some are simply scooped up by recruiters. it would be a HUGE gamble for g-man to give adrian the same type of privilege as gordon by hiring him, since g-man doesn't know what there is to appeal to within adrian. for all we know, adrian might not have cared what happened either way!

not that i mean to suggest adrian is passively suicidal or anything like that, but we really don't know what would've been his ideal outcome for himself regarding the situation. we don't even know his motivation for fighting to survive black mesa, aside from his writing from beforehand which says he wants "change and adventure"

adrian being dangerous and hard to read conflicts with his potential as an asset to g-man, making g-man unsure on how to approach him. since there's not much he can infer about adrian, what does he do? he plays the "im just the messenger, it isn't my fault" card

all of this puts adrian's evaluation into question, specifically his status

it's as blunt as the rest, but choice of wording almost insinuates adrian is a criminal. not "delayed" or "on hold" but "detained"

#half life #half life opposing force #opposing force #adrian shephard #gman #not tagging gordon cause this aint about him #i dont usually make long posts like this #please forgive any grammatical errors #text post tag

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liberalk1tsch · 3 months ago

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Hi. Do you think until he was hijacked Peeta was able to show the Capitol that he is not simply a mere piece in their Games? How about by the end of the books when he had to overcome what they did to him?

hello anon!

oh peeta absolutely showed the capitol that he was more than just a piece in their games. as a matter of fact, i think that is largely one of the reasons they hijacked him in the first place.

from the start of the first games, he refused to play by their rules. in his interview, by declaring his feelings for katniss, he forces the audience to confront the fact that tributes have feelings at all and they absolutely eat it up. katniss attributes this to him being good with his words, but this is the first time he establishes himself as a player rather than a pawn in snow's game. someone to be reckoned with.

he manipulates the audience to the point that they change the damn rules to a game that — as far as we know — has never had a rule change in the entirety of its history (other than adding rules as the games developed ofc).

right off the bat, he joins the careers — the game favourites — last second, only to betray them and take a near-fatal wound for the girl he loves. he doesn't purposefully kill anyone in that games save for the one girl that cato fails to finish off (and let's be fr, that was more a mercy than anything). he's not playing because he wants himself to survive, but because he wants katniss to survive.

this destroys the traditional view of the games. that the careers, the big and powerful and deadly tributes, are not something to glorify, but rather to abhor. that if kids are going to be executed, they at least deserve the respect and humanity of being put out of their misery as opposed to having a lingering spectacle of a death. that it's more honourable to give up your own life for somebody you care about than to hunt down others for your own survival.

i realise that katniss views peeta's actions as him playing right into the capitol's game, but i personally view it as him doing the precise opposite. indulging his personal feelings humanises them as teenagers who are meant to be distinctly dehumanised.

and that's the whole problem, isn't it? that's why they change the rules. that's why katniss and peeta are able to pull off the berry stunt.

cos peeta forces their hand by making them see them as people.

he only reinforces this in cf by making friends with all the other tributes, dropping the baby bomb, etc. — he continually turns everything back onto the capitol, blaming them and holding them accountable for treating them as less than human.

katniss thinks that she's the rebellious one in the relationship, but honestly? she wouldn't have been able to do the majority of her acts of rebellion without peeta setting the stage for her to do it. he's not the innocent that she narrates him to be; he is just as — if not more — rebellious than she is. to control him via hijacking is to control her. not just emotionally, but also because he also acts as a catalyst for her. if 13 had both of them united, the rebels would've been unstoppable. and i stand by that.

obviously the hijacking is snow's attempt at bending peeta to his will and forcing him to become his pawn, but peeta overcoming the hijacking and growing back together with katniss, recovering the feelings he has for her, only further cements his success at evading being a piece in their games.

i just know snow rolls in his grave when they hit each other with the

So after, when he whispers, “You love me. Real or not real?” I tell him, “Real.”

this is sort of just the tip of the iceberg, but just some of my thoughts:)

#thanks for the ask!#the hunger games #thg #katniss everdeen #peeta mellark #everlark

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she-posts-nerdy-stuff · 2 years ago

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It genuinely keeps me up at night that when Van Eck attempts to reveal to the Merchant Council that Wylan can’t read, they all react exactly as Wylan feared they would. (Spoilers ahead!) Of course since they don’t believe him and Wylan’s brilliant memory for Jesper’s words protects him we don’t see the full force of their response, but it is made PAINFULLY clear that they all would have responded the same way Van Eck did - “How could you say such things about your own blood?”. It’s an incredibly meaningful and arguably subtle detail that Bardugo implements to remind the reader that although Van Eck was our main antagonist in this case, there is no singular villain in this story because what the characters are fighting is an ultimately unbeatable source. The system is impossible to truly defeat because it is a hydra, we see that when Dryden’s father died he took on the role of the Council and acted the exact same way he did, and if Van Eck had raised Wylan to one day take over from him then he too would have been forcibly moulded into that shape by the poisonous environment of this governing body. The defeat of Van Eck, had Kaz not amended his will to name Wylan his inheritor, would have been only that: the downfall of a singular man, to be easily replaced by another with the same dangerously capitalistic values and crude methods of implementing them. It would not have been any change in the system that oppresses the main characters - I think it’s kind of similar to the Hunger Games (spoilers ahead) when Katniss chooses to kill Coin instead of Snow because she realises that killing Snow doesn’t actually change the system if someone else will simply step into his shoes. We also see this reflected in Kaz and his mission to destroy Rollins, since by doing so he too has taken the actions Rollins did. When Inej points out their similarities he denies it, saying “I don’t sell girls, I don’t con helpless kids out of their money”. Inej replies with the gentle, HEARTBREAKING sentence: “Look at the floor of the Crow Club, Kaz”. And this is so important because Kaz has no consideration for what happens to those people once they step outside his door. How do they fair after he scams them? How many of them have had no other money to fall back on? Did one of them sell their daughter to be able to pay off their debts to him? He’d never know, he just had the money and that’s all he thinks about. But if that girl survived long enough to want revenge, who would she blame? Say she didn’t want to blame her parents, like Kaz doesn’t want to blame Jordie, then who becomes the manifestation of all her hatred, the one thing she has decided that destroying will cure her? Kaz does. Just as Rollins has for him.

Every system of this city is a hydra, and there are so many beautifully written reminders of this without forcing it down our throats, but there is also the hope of genuine, real change. In Wylan, joining the Merchant Council as someone opposed to its views, as someone who has lived in both sides of this city and been abused by both of them, as someone who understands that real change is hard to implement. In Inej, as she journeys against the system that abused her not for revenge, but for the protection of all the children who have been hurt and killed, of all the children being hurt and killed, and of all the children who would have been hurt and killed if she didn’t stop the slavers who sought them, as someone who knows that real change is action. In Jesper, as someone raised far from the suffocating closed-minded atmosphere of the Merchant Council and who can support Wylan through it, as someone who knows that striving for real change is messy and chaotic, but that it’s where he thrives. In Matthias, who died believing that the world could truly change, who died believing in Nina, believing in himself, and believing that his death was a necessary sacrifice to real change, even though he wanted it to be peaceful. In Nina, as someone who had learned that real change cannot always be won with violence, as someone who will learn to use her new power to restructure a civilisation, as someone who will spend the rest of her life striving for change because nothing could ever be worse than her beloved having died in vain. And in Kaz, in the small ways, in the fear of what he could become that will hold him back from becoming the next head of the hydra, in his love for Inej shifting his perception of the world, and in his slow journey of healing, maybe one day killing Rollins will be enough. And if that doesn’t work, he’ll burn the world down and start it all again.

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jalebi-weds-bluetooth · 18 days ago

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Helllooooo Jalebi! How are you doing? I have a dark and kind of disturbing question for you, sorry about that. Well, the show itself can be dark and kind of disturbing at times! So the infamous dori tearing scene - I know from a Doylist (ie out of universe/writers) point of view, it was done to establish a male lead about as dark as one could make him on ITV thereby making the journey of him as a romantic lead, becoming a hero over time, more complex and interesting. I mean there was a big "lets shock and awe them" element to it so I accept that I might be over thinking things. But from a Watsonian (in universe/Arnav) point of view, was there, in your opinion, is Arnav a sexual harasser with a history of such behaviour? Like - is there any lust/desire involved in that action? Or was it purely motivated by rage, and a immediate need to make Khushi shut up, without any element of "I want to see her naked by force if I have to"? Idk if I am making sense, I'm not saying pure rage is better. But like for example when Arnav tears down the flowers around the bed on their first marriage night, when he breaks things in his room, when he starts destroying his plants, those are some moments of like, he's in an uncontrollable rage and he needs a physical outlet. That's a pattern, is this action a part of THAT pattern? Or is it a different kind of act? I know Arnav is capable of immense emotional cruelty. But still that's all on one side and being capable of sexual violence when in a rage is another level. And although dori-tearing is the start of the entire tale, I still cannot quite believe that Arnav is capable of sexual harassment ( despite him literally doing it twice, maybe even three times on screen). I can't reconcile it with the guy who we witnessed at Arshi's under the stars first time. It's one of two things - he's the kind of guy who uses sexual violence to punish women/becomes sexually violent when in a rage OR he never does that but Khushi specifically (his future wife!) brings it out in him and IDK which is more disturbing. Like in my head for a long time I was like, he didn't mean it like sexual harassment, it was just a moment of rage that was defused by Khushi's action of hiding herself with her hair. But IDK...do you think if his rage at that moment had not been defused by any interruption he would have continued to do something worse to Khushi? I'm sorry for such a long and rambling question that too on such a topic. I swear I'm not an Arnav hater, I sound like one, I just, find Arnav's psychology fascinating and I think his actual worst action/pattern of behaviour in the entire show is treated almost like an abstract concept than a real thing he did, as opposed to less disturbing much more understandable actions like blackmailing Khushi, calling her biggest mistake, etc. Anyway thanks for listening to my ramble and would love to hear your thoughts. Bye :)

This is so interesting.

Thank you for introducting Doylist & Watsonian ideologies <3

Gosh I wish this was a phone call!

Okay, so before I answer any of this please do note that my answer is within my understanding of media literacy and psychology - which is obviously always limited - so the answer will veer towards what is right to me and is always, always open to more interpretation.

And listen, the guy who snaps the dori does not become the guy who shows stars. This journey is fictional. So don't worry about sounding an Arnav hater - please, in reality all women are. But he's fictional - that's where nothing of this exists so I'm really glad your sense of sense prevails!

*deep breathe* let's get crackin'

This is a very complex scene. It's uncomfortable. It's sexual harassment. It's abuse. It's traumatic.

So my view on Arnav's viewpoint is what makes me continue to watch the show without skipping this scene. And I mention that because for a show like Madhubala, no matter how well the first 200 episodes are written - I can never actually watch the scene where Rishab intentionally nearly kills Madhu's father. I have to, kind of, write that scene away.

So intentionality, for me, matters.

And that is what paints this scene for me in a slightly different light for fictional purpose.

is Arnav a sexual harasser with a history of such behaviour?

No, I don't think so. Like you, I do believe this was motivated by anger.

But is Arnav capable of sexual harassment? Absolutely.

Has he? No.

And the reason why I say this is because I believe Shyam is completely capable of sexual harassment because of the continuous insinuation of him to the Guptas that "I was a guy, living the house with two girls, and I chose to not be indecent to them."

He operates from preventing himself from sexually harassing Khushi as (a) need to establish he's a nice person, (b) this is the reward of being truly in love, (c) Khushi is an innocent person who needs gentleness.

And the minute those conditions stop existing for Shyam - the more he harasses. As you can see repeatedly in the show for as long as Shyam had to keep up his need to be a nice person - he apologizes for all the lines he has crossed with Khushi (but he's slipping).

And the minute he no longer needs to maintain that, he gets more lecherous and enjoys Khushi's struggle to get free.

She chose a more violent man, so Shyam gets to be truly who he is.

Obviously, sexual harassers don't just have one type of behavior, but the reason I compare Arnav to Shyam is that for this universe it becomes easier for me to put forth my points.

Arnav is operating from a misogynistic viewpoint. This random girl has no character to begin with. So no snapping of a dori nor having her images floated around as a woman trying to trap a man will hurt her. He finds her attempts at decency a mockery.

He is even amused for half a second that Khushi has a complaint with him for doing so.

The image of this entirely changes around the guesthouse incident - and either way Arnav is very very wrong for thinking character matters if only a person is a good person.

And it's to establish that Arnav has very little moral grounding.

was it purely motivated by rage, and a immediate need to make Khushi shut up, without any element of "I want to see her naked by force if I have to"?

No, I don't think he was interested in undressing Khushi. She accused him of being indecent.

While in his head, it is he is the better person between them.

So, yes, it was rage. From a Watsonian point of view, Arnav exactly knew what kind of a woman this was. A pretty, corporate spy set to sabotage his event.

Also, the fact she pulls up his sister's name and the pained history blinds him in rage - and his anger is something that Anjali warns him about.

It is his weakness.

He uses it to mask his vulnerability. Anger replaces almost any and every sad/hurt/vulnerable emotion Arnav has. Even his confession or care, does not come out with a "hey, I love you, I care for you."

No, it's always accompanied by anger as its shield because I guess that's his perceived sense of safety.

He'd rather be feared than have people see his fears.

I think he's able to feel safe with his emotions and opens up to Khushi is the night he says sorry to her and apologizes for everything he's ever done. After that moment, telling Khushi he loves her or sharing anything emotional/vulnerable, is no longer accompanied by rage.

I think Dadi actually helped him heal in many ways. He gains a new perspective and actually tries being better. His anger permanently reduces because of having dealt with things.

So going back to the dori scene it goes exactly like this:

Khushi - what would you do if someone would insult your sister the way you did mine?

For Arnav, it's not Khushi calling out how horribly he's treating her. It's almost close to I can say the exact things about your sister - and I wouldn't be too wrong.

We can assume that not very pleasant things were told about Anjali when she was abandoned at the altar. That too because her parents committed suicide out of her father's adultery.

It's something the show never, ever, touches on but I definitely think there were comments on Anjali's character.

do you think if his rage at that moment had not been defused by any interruption he would have continued to do something worse to Khushi?

No. Cause I don't think he was intending to sexually assault her.

For Khushi though - yes this is a space where she can sexually assaulted.

So for Arnav, if Khushi's a spy, she has done her homework.

He stops her from leaving her after her piece - and lethally wounding him and triggering trauma.

He humiliates her.

And just physically pushes her away cause she disgusts him and he has no intention of being close to her.

His gaze here - is focused on her. Not her exposed back. And that only shifts when she pushes her hair to cover her back. And he stays rooted to his spot.

He wanted to have his last word - and he did.

Ugh I hate saying this line but 'the hair' will not stop an abuser from wanting to do what he wants to.

Arnav was done speaking/done acting at that point. The character, here, would not go beyond it because he's done with his piece.

Also what's important to note is IPK was written from a problematic POV so I might be stepping into places where I'm putting explanations where it might not even exist, originally.

There's many things about Arnav - even in the next few episodes that show he isn't an assaulter.

However, if there's an episode where fully intended to - and perhaps would've and did - is when Khushi calls him characterless.

See what I don't love about this show is that many a times Arnav's aggression is written as a reaction to Khushi's transgressions and it's always more than what Khushi did in the first place.

And Khushi, here, was WAY out of line. To call a person characterless, question his dead parents' upbringing just because he doesn't want to marry? C'mon *whack* what's wrong with you Khushi?

But Arnav's reaction... there's this glazed look in his eyes that's frightening.

And he, intentionally, presses himself up to her. And it's when he has this Shyam-esque thinking of exactly knowing what being characterless is, but he's not behaving like one but he can. Unlike Shyam, Arnav is not holding himself back to have a nice man image. But Arnav is threatening Khushi that she does not know the gravity of what she's saying because he knows he's not a characterless man (unlike his father) and if she needs a physical understanding of it - here it is.

So yeah, this scene is where it went even darker for me than the dori sequence because what if Khushi continued to challenge? What if Arnav isn't satisfied by the guilt and realization of what Khushi said? (Cause he lets her go when he sees her crying, a little ashamed)

But what if, that wasn't enough?

when Arnav tears down the flowers around the bed on their first marriage night, when he breaks things in his room, when he starts destroying his plants, those are some moments of like, he's in an uncontrollable rage and he needs a physical outlet. That's a pattern, is this action a part of THAT pattern? Or is it a different kind of act?

That scene, I actually interpret differently. Because it was very significant of broken/shattered dreams.

Arnav was very sure loving Khushi means marrying Khushi. This was going to be a reality - the marriage, having a wife, in love, being happy... this was something he didn't believe in but he was starting to believe in it because he was in love.

And that moment it felt like the wedding bed, the rituals were mocking him. He should've trusted his cynicism but he didn't and now his world was in tatters.

So he wanted that pain out. His life wasn't perfect. Forget perfect, it was barely livable.

It's the pain that we saw him collapse after the terrace scene. Mourning the loss of love. The loss of a dream. This tearing the flowers apart is a part of that. It's literally him ripping his own heart into pieces.

Because he's been holding it all in for the sake of his family. And he just cannot hold any longer.

But I think you sum up writing Arnav very well with this statement -his actual worst action/pattern of behaviour in the entire show is treated almost like an abstract concept than a real thing he did.

That is very very true. Arnav is difficult to explain in reality cause certain patterns and behavior does not explain the happily ever after - but hey that's what fiction is for!

So to be completely in Arnav's head and talk about his actions - he suffers from anger management issues and when threatened he chooses lashing out. Sometimes some of the actions and words are beyond his control - sometimes they're not.

The anger is a pattern, the sexual violence is not.

And mostly the anger is when his family/upbringing is talked about:

Mool Rajani mentions Arnav's mother, like not even her specifically but a very Delhi "tu, teri mummy" and gets whacked. I keep on laughing a little that Arnav slapped Mool a second time just because he could - it's not even instinctive unlike the first (lol Akash isn't even surprised, he's just like... I didn't wanna waste a penny on this idiot).

Khushi mentions his sister and given the situation and what he thinks of her, he snaps the dori - interesting to note is when Khushi again brings up family in the guesthouse, Arnav doesn't get angry. Rather he's ashamed because Khushi is bringing up a similar argument like she did in the dori scene, but this time he has better context of her and he does dehumanize her.

Nani talks about Arnav being like his father - Arnav decides to walk out of the house. Arnav's arguments with Nani is often tempered out of age, and that he truly never feels threatened by her.

Anjali pressurizes Arnav to bring Khushi back - he snaps at her that the house isn't hers. And obviously, regrets instantly.

Of course Arnav has been angry many a more times - but in those situations he's intending to hurt as opposed to sudden lash outs. And then intentional anger is someone who affects him, means a lot, threatens him or who he hates.

Khushi, for the longest time, is someone who is literally all of the above for Arnav.

And I think we can hold our peace on the fact that Arnav gets better - not as a result of Khushi - but just as a person he gets better. Otherwise his reaction to knowing his wife doesn't trust him and gets him secretly DNA tested is very very mild, compared to how his anger was written.

Or the HUGE amount of different when Khushi wants to walk out (post kidnapping, during Aarav) - tells us that Arnav has gotten better, psychologically, over time.

So he needed help, and I think he gets it with having most of his abandonment, family issues being sorted out.

We see him reach a point of comfort with himself, his family and relationships. Yes, Khushi was a victim of his healing - but perhaps the bigger gratitude Arnav shows for Khushi is that he wouldn't have wanted to be healed if there wasn't a love this great.

He never thanks her for bearing his anger, he's grateful he met her and knows what love is. It's a subtle difference but it's important cause Arnav's story, for me, is NEVER a 'stick around with your angry husband and he'll come to love you one day' - no, it's just about a love that happens in the most impossible circumstances with the most impossible of people.

Arnav, character wise, remains a LOT like who he is even with Khushi.

He's still non vegetarian, still an atheist, still arrogant - but just more calm because he's less in pain. Like a lion without a constant tear of a nail on his skin - and he's the only person who could've unpinned the nail from himself.

You know it's what Anjali says in the first episode - let go of your past. Holding back to the past made Arnav successful, but also caustic.

Now that his success is permanent, it's time to let go of the past because finally there's something better to look forward to.

And that's love.

Best,

Jalebi

Gosh, this was a LONG LONG LONG answer - I hope you liked it! Tagging all my favs cause this was one really took a lot of time to draft and I hope to hear your thoughts. Phew, haven't thought about this guy in a LONG time.

Fictionally, love him.

Tagging (lemme know if you want to be added)

@chutkiandchotte@dreaming-star@professor-cant-fuck@thedupattaknowswhatsup@bigfatreader@muttonthings@da-ka-ba@fresh-child-bouquet@hand-picked-star

@fancydreamphilosopher@scorpio-smiles@thenainitaldisaster@titaliya@sankititaliya@sampigehoovu@jalebicheesecake@dnkkpi @nammy07

#ipkknd #ask #anon #about arnav #ANALYSIS #JALEBI ANALYSED SO MUCH #MUST'VE GOTTEN LOST HERE AND THERE #tbh I thought I'd never complete this #cause there's so much to unpack #and so difficult to separate right from wrong #phew #Arnav singh raziada #why you make me think so much #sigh no wonder I loved you for years #kinda do still?#this is becoming long #again #lol

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