#plus he really did an amazing job with this scene!

[byemambo]

20250317 | THE BOYZ - VVV THE BOYZ 3rd ALBUM [Unexpected]

THE BOYZ Music Videos [4/?]

[ddaz3d-and-cc0nfused]

aaron hotchner x jacks nanny/babysitter

she’s got a crazy ex that stalked and threatened her so she moved far away to live a simple, under the radar life and started working for hotch. he knows her situation and does his best to look out for her, maybe she’s like a live in nanny ? neither of them is bold enough to make a move first until her ex finds her and hotch and the team race to save her. ends with love confessions and all the sappy stuff

could be a one shot or a short lil series i’m sure whatever you write will be amazing !

༉‧₊˚. 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐨-𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫 || 𝐚𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐞𝐫

— pairing: aaron hotchner x plus size babysitter!reader

— summary: your new life as a live-in nanny was wonderful, and with your dark past behind you, there was nothing that could ruin this. but as they say, what goes around comes around.

— warnings: heavily detailed violence BEWARE, surprisingly light angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, emotional hurt/comfort, physical hurt/comfort, mutual pining, abusive ex's :[, guns, and a horribly written action/fight scene (forgive me).

— wc: 1965

⋆ a/n: okay this is a heavy fic so beware once more, but aside from that this takes a fully turn! i don't really have anything else to say besides enjoy!

masterlist | AO3

“Backpack? Check. Lunchbox? Check. Shoes are tied? Check.” 

You placed your hands on your hips triumphantly, a proud smile on your face as you examined the little boy. 

Being a live-in nanny came with being organizational and making sure that Jack was ready for school everyday without fail. It wasn’t like Aaron was super strict on you; he understands when you have your days where things are a bit out of place, but honestly it was a personal preference, and totally not because you have a big fat crush on the FBI agent.

You had been very skeptical about your babysitting position at first because of your ex who was absolutely bat shit crazy. It was a situation you had barely escaped from, and it had taken almost everything in you to get where you were now, so you were a little afraid of men in general. But Aaron was kind, and welcoming, and fatherly, someone that you felt safe with.

And then, you fell in love.

It had scared the shit out of you of course, but now it was a feeling that you welcomed with open arms, even if you couldn’t act on it. 

Your phone began to ring as you searched for the car keys, the contact name read ‘Aaron <3’.

“Morning!” You greeted with a smile as you picked up. “Good morning. How are you guys?” The older man asked. “We're doing just fine, as always,” You successfully found the keys. “How are things?” You knew better than to ask how he was, because if you had the kind of job that he did, there was no way you could answer positively. 

“We pretty much have everything we need, so we’ll probably be able to wrap this case up early.” 

“Oh Aaron, that's great!” You cheer happily and make your way back to where Jack was waiting for you. “You ready to go, little man?” Jack looks up at you from his toys. “Is that daddy on the phone?”

“Yeah buddy, you wanna say hi?” 

“Yes!” Jack’s answer was full of excitement, and you can’t help but smile. “As much as I enjoy talking to you, it looks like I’m handing you over.” You swear you could hear Aaron chuckle.

Yeah, this was a life that you could get used to.

Having the house to yourself was weird.

With Jack away at his aunt’s for the weekend, it was strangely quiet due to the emptiness of the child’s presence. You suppose you’re grateful for the break even though taking care of Jack really isn’t as tiring as one might think. 

Despite Aaron rarely being home, he’s managed to raise the boy well when he could, and it’s honestly very admirable. It’s one of the many things that made you fall in love with him. You gaze down into the wine glass at the thought, a small smile tugging at the corners of your lips.

Ugh, why does love make you such a loser?

Your bashful train of thought was stopped by a suspicious thump coming from the back of the house. Your smile dropped and a feeling of anxiety and worry twisted in your gut as you grabbed your phone that was lying on the kitchen counter.

You’re quick to dial Aaron’s number and your fingernail finds itself in your mouth as you chew on it anxiously. It’s an old habit, one that you had picked up back in your old relationship.

“Hello?” Rasped Aaron. 

You knew he had just recently flown in from wherever he was because you could hear the foot traffic of everyone grabbing their luggage from the plane’s storage.

“Hey,” Your greeting was nervous and it was something that Aaron easily picked up on. “What’s wrong? Are you alright?” He asks with a furrowed brow. “Yeah, just um - I’m just hearing some weird things so I just wanted to know when you think you might be getting home.” I miss you.

“Honey what type of weird things?” Before you were able to answer, there was a loud crashing sound. You instantly dropped to the floor to hide behind the counter; you cradled the phone to your ear, “Okay uh - change of claim,” You attempted to joke. “Someone is most definitely in the house.”

Aaron tries not to panic at the way his insides turn cold, “You remember what to do, right?” He asks with a hardened voice. You gulp, stretching slightly to peer over the marble. You stare out into the darkness and a frightened shiver shoots up your spine. 

“Get to your room and enter the safe.” You reiterated what he had told you almost a year ago when you had first moved in. You’ve never shot a gun before but tonight might be the night where you learn how too.

“That’s right, and do you remember the code?” 

As you went to answer him, you were snatched up by your hair and a scream rang out and into the phone. Even though you weren’t on speaker the others that were currently standing outside with Aaron could hear it.

Aaron desperately calls out your name, and with your silence he takes off without any explanation, but his team knows to follow close behind.

“So, this is what you’ve been doing since you tried to leave me?!”

You cried out as another blow was delivered to your gut but a heavy boot. Your lungs burned and there were tears streaming down your face. He had pulled you so hard over the counter that it made your scalp burn, a blistering headache beginning to form at the base of your skull.

“Fuck you!” You spat as you attempted to prop yourself up on your elbows. 

There was a fine line between anger and fear, and this was one of those moments where they blend together. If you ended up dying tonight, at least you didn’t go down in vain.

This time he punched you in the face before snatching you up by your arms. There was a metallic taste in your mouth, a bruise already developing near your eye. “Why’d you leave me, huh?! We had a good thing going and you just… you just ruined it!”

“I didn’t ruin shit asshole!” You screamed and pushed at him but it was no use. “We were gonna get married but you… but you wanted to play house with an old man, really?!”

“You’ve been watching me.” You said in disbelief. It made your stomach twist in nausea and horror at the thought of him watching Jack, what he could’ve done to him. You had actively put the man you loved kid in danger and it devastated you.

“I had no choice!”

“You’re fucking crazy!”

“Put your hands where I can see them.” Aaron’s voice rang out throughout the house.

Before you knew it you were spun around with a gun to your head, his arm locked against your neck, faintly strangling you.

“Aaron!” You called out in relief, but it turned into a grunt as you tugged further into your ex’s chest.

Aaron’s gun was raised steadily, his eyes focused on your attacker, but he doesn’t hesitate to cast you a reassuring look. When he sees your bloody and bruised face his jaw tightens, the vein in his neck popping and visible through his skin.

“Boyfriend to the rescue, huh?” Your ex sneers into your cheek. You shudder. 

“Put the gun down.” Aaron continues to coax, and out the corner of your eye you can see Morgan approaching through the darkness. 

“Why do you want to save this slut? Don’t tell me you’ve already -” A shot rings out into the fair followed by a scream of pain.

Your ex collapses to the ground, cradling the gunshot wound in his knee as blood spills through his fingers. Aaron was the one that pulled the trigger and Morgan is already in the kitchen by the time he’s tugging you away and into his arms.

“Oh God.” You finally cried. “You came, you came…” His arms are wound tightly around you, purposefully tucking your face into his chest. “I’m here, I’m here.” He shushes and rocks you side to side in order to try and lull you.

Aaron – softly – orders you to sit down while he cleans up the blood when the rest of the team has already left.

You can’t help but watch him from where you’re sitting on the couch with his sleeves of his white button up rolled up and his hands gloved. “I’m sorry.” You decide to say, because you really were. “I’m sorry for everything.” There was so much more you wanted to say, but you felt your throat tighten with unshed tears.

“No, don’t apologize.” He says softly, abandoning the rag that he was using to scrub up said blood. “No Aaron you don’t understand. I put you and Jack in danger because of my bullshit and I thought that I had put it all behind me and I don’t -” 

“Stop.” It’s a bit firmer this time. “I knew exactly what I was getting myself into when I offered you to live with me and my son. Nothing that has occurred tonight has swayed my trust or opinion about you, you know that, right?”

“Right.” His hand holds your cheek and strokes the soft skin of it. “Good.”

Your eyes flicker down to his lips before peering back into his eyes, “If I asked you to kiss me, would you?”

“I’m not sure.”

“I promise this isn’t like a trauma bond thing. I’ve liked you for as long as I’ve worked for you and I didn’t want to tell you because I have nowhere else to go if you say no. Plus,” You sigh, “I just don’t want to make things difficult or uncomfortable for you.”

“You could never do that, feelings reciprocated or not.” He reassures.

“Well are they?”

He grins at your question, “I’d be an idiot not to feel the same way.” You laugh and he leans forward to join your lips together.

A warm feeling spreads in your gut and you knew that this is what love was supposed to feel like.

ೃ⁀➷ my lovely taglist!: @alina02 @louderfortheback @minervadashwood @their-love @fandomsarelifee @theendofthe70s @nomajdetective @mgg-theprettiestboy @phoenixblack89 @celtic-crossbow @hallecarey1 @bunnybabe-babydoll @alixwriter @dixonzzgirl @violettavirus @khxna @moonysreid

[magesforthedas]

Just have to share this, because I keep seeing critiques of Veilguard that like, try to guilt people who say they love, or even like the game. And HEAVY critiques of the protagonist, Rook, and how they aren't really a hero.

ALSO it contains some SPOILERS so just be warned ☺️ and an edit of additional thoughts now!

Like, yeah I have a couple gripes about the game, but overall it's emotional and amazing and I care about the characters so deeply. I keep seeing how people are saying how Rook and the party were not well written because they caused a lot of death?? This is Dragon Age, everything always goes from bad to worse, but the characters always bring out the light.

Rook was put in a very shitty situation, and I've seen people say they caused the destruction of thousands by trying to prevent the hundreds. But how many people, before the game came out, said Solas's plan to tear down the veil was a bad idea? Not all, I'm sure, but most. I always viewed it, and I know I wasn't alone, as that by trying to "fix" things Solas was just justifying his selfish wants, when he knew somewhere in his heart that the people of today, including the elves that he was "doing this for", would rather live alongside their friends & family in a world without their old magic, than live in a world with it alone.

That being said, even with differing views in and out of the game, it's very reasonable that a group of people would try to stop him, not know the consequences. And the beautiful thing about Rook, why Varric chose THEM, is that they saw what they had created, and didn't give up, didn't leave it to someone else to fix. Whether or not it was really their fault they stepped up and tried to save the world the best they could, from the mistake they unwittingly made (which I would argue against the fact that they made a "mistake", looking at that they were hired to do a job & by successfully completing that job there were unintended consequences).

Parallels anyone? Dragon Age loves those. But the difference, again illustrated in the game, is that while Solas couldn't move past the regret of his mistakes, Rook could. And on the topic of the deaths of those around them, not everyone that died in the past was Solas's fault, but some he did directly lead to their deaths. And he accepted that, did it over & over. Rook never led anyone to their death. Rook walked willingly into it themselves, and the love and trust their companions felt led them to choose to die for Rook, and the world instead.

And people who say the destruction of the south means the earlier games were for nothing? How so? 20 years ago, 10 years ago, things were happening, people were dying that needed saving. The heroes of that age saved the world so it would still be around to save now. And who knows what the south really looks like, or what it might look like as and after rebuilding? We will, in another 10 years once BioWare comes out with more content I suppose, and I wouldn't be surprised if everyone we knew is dead, but I also wouldn't be surprised if many, many of them lived.

Because that is Dragon Age. Death, betrayal, sacrifice, cruelty, pain. It's a dark, dark world. But there is always a ray of light, of hope. And characters who will do their utmost to protect that .

EDIT: Adding!! To this!! And more spoilers!!!

We know because of the Wetlands that it's possible to cause the Blight to pull back. In the end scene, as people are being broken out of the Blight Roots, it seems to me like it's died, at least to some degree. In my playthrough, Neve was cured of her blight sickness. There's obviously some immediate changes, and that all means that the South could have had an immediate reprieve. Plus, once more surviving wardens from Weisshaupt are free to travel south, and all the factions up north get things relatively in order, the South could get a lot of assistance.

The South was overrun... By hordes, by growths? That's the land, what about the people? Could the combined might of the Inquisitor, the Chantry, The Free Marches, Fereldan's ruler, have evacuated enough people that the death toll might be high, but not totally catastrophic? Enough people have survived to rebuild, maybe with a better, more unified attitude towards one another?

(The last bit may be wishful thinking 🥲)

But still!! We have no idea what exactly happened down there. And no matter what, Rook did the best they could, they WERE a hero, and made a difference not only for the North, but everywhere affected.

And yes, I might complain about this or that, mainly that we don't get to put more past game decisions in.... But I love this game and that won't change.

[myokk]

Hi! I'm still feral for these two, would you mind giving us some art of them in their later years together!?

Hello angel!!!!

Sorry it’s taken so long to respond🫶🫶 but I wanted to draw some new art for this ask💓

We have: Sebastian and Eloise trying out their new fancy camera with a selfie, pictures of them with their daughter, and finally…idk I just always felt like this drawing is when they’re a bit older💓

I want to take this ask as an opportunity as well to talk a little about how I imagine their future (I have no chill & you can ignore this and just enjoy the art if you want😇).

I am a COMPLETE pantser - I never know how a chapter’s going to end when I start writing it (I always just have a few scenes I know I need to include to keep the plot moving forward). Although I have different *big* scenes I’m always writing towards, and themes/plot elements I’m always foreshadowing (shout out to @elliecutte for catching *almost* all of my hints and appreciating my general no chill😆), IM STILL NOT 100% SURE HOW I WILL END THINGS !!! 😳 I have a lot of endings I see as possible, and I think soon it will become more clear to me what will work the best💓

HAPPY ENDING:

Eloise and Sebastian become Unspeakables. I have a LOT of thoughts on this profession that could be its OWN post, and I feel like Unspeakables are generally specialized in one or two departments, but as their interests/research change they also change.

Eloise becomes an Unspeakable in the Mind and Death departments, with the occasional foray into Time. Her ancient magic is connected with all of these things (my version of AM is NOT like the game) & the Department of Mysteries is one of the only places that gives her any useful information about these things. Plus she thinks too much (it IS her hobby after all😆💓) and is very introverted so a hermit job like this is a perfect fit.

Sebastian becomes an Unspeakable as well, but I feel like it takes him a long time to specialize in anything, if he ever does. I just feel like becoming an Unspeakable is the adult equivalent of sneaking into the Restricted Section🥹🫶

They grow old together (I won’t explain TOO much) & have a lovely little family🥹 at least one daughter that they both dote on. Sebastian had an amazing childhood (idyllic until it wasn’t), and wants to give his daughter the same, and Eloise works hard to make sure their daughter feels the love that she never had growing up🥺

When Sirius is burned off the family tree, Eloise and Sebastian take him in🥹🫶 (they’re like 100 years old but WIZARDS LIVE LONGER…) The same happened to her all those years ago, and she wants him to know that his whole family hasn’t abandoned him.

Eloise LOVED her nieces - Bellatrix, Andromeda, and Narcissa - when they were younger, but as Voldemort becomes more powerful & people realize WHAT he’s doing, she has to separate herself from them. Her heart breaks seeing Bellatrix go mad, and seeing Narcissa engaged to a Malfoy out of obligation😔 (iykyk)

I haven’t thought any more about happy ending but I think it’s fun to think about how their future story might weave in with the actual canon events, ESPECIALLY since Eloise is a Black🥹💓

SAD ENDING:

After Sebastian gets his hands on Slytherin’s relic, it really starts to consume him and makes him even MORE obsessive than his natural tendencies - I imagine it similarly “talking” to him like Slytherin’s locket/horcrux did in Deathly Hallows (😳)

Eloise is deathly afraid of the changes she’s seeing in Sebastian and steals it from him (he would never willingly give it to her ESPECIALLY if it starts to feel like a precious item to him)

BUT the relic triggers the latent Black Family Madness in her - the madness that afflicts almost every woman in her family since…🤭 - and she herself starts to lose touch with reality. Her body and soul are already destroying themselves between the curse and the ancient magic inside of her, and the relic is what triggers it in her.

Sebastian becomes an Unspeakable, focusing on the Mind, in a desperate attempt to find a cure for his Eloise🥺

He never gives up his research, and sometimes when he comes home she is lucid and they talk about his research - otherwise, he just loves and takes care of her.

(He’s never successful in finding a way to reverse what he feels he caused in the first place - his ambition and single-mindedness is, to him, the reason why all of this happened)

Honestly who knows if I end their story either of these ways😌 I just love thinking of AUs and different endings and I have a few others I’ve considered as well!!! And whatever endings I don’t write will be immortalized on this blog and in my art as well🙏

[ecrivainalene]

Leviathan Panel at Otakon 2024

I was OVERJOYED to be at the Leviathan panel during Otakon 2024! I'll do my best to recap it below, but if you want a more coherent play by play, this Twitter user did an excellent job.

I've got a handful of photos, recap of Sharp Gender Discussion, plus misc. things I remember.

Not everyone was up for the entire time, but I snapped this photo near the end when everyone was on stage! From left to right: Waki Kiyotaka (Studio Orange), Yoshihiro Watanabe (Studio Orange), Scott Westerfeld, Christophe Ferreira (Quibic Pictures), Justin Leach (Quibic Pictures), Katrina Minett (Quibic Pictures), and Diana Garnet (ending theme vocalist).

New concept art! Looks like Dr. Barlow, Klopp, Alek, and Sharp, right before the Germans attack the Leviathan.

More under the cut!

Alternative shot of that art bc I couldn't get my lighting right:

Clanker and Darwinist technology designs. Watanave explained that Studio Orange's early days were spent doing contract work on Gundam anime, so I can't wait to see how that translates to the Clanker machines.

Some more concept art:

By the way, the entire series is being adapted at once - so we'll get the complete story at once! That in mind, the second image here makes me think of that maneuver near the beginning of Goliath to pick up the cargo.

Sharp!!! Look at them!!!

I don't have much to say about these but I'm fairly sure I hadn't seen them before. I am wondering if they downsized Alek's crew for the sake of the story, or perhaps we just haven't seem Bauer and Hoffman yet.

We got some new character art! The panel was very cryptic about who the character designer is. Apparently they're pretty well known, but they can't share it yet!

Volger I am so sorry your photo was unfocused. Forgive me.

The panel jokingly described him as "Alek's dad," which feels accurate. And maybe I misunderstood, but it sounds like he plays an even more important role in the anime than he does in the books. I've always considered Volger to be a pretty important character, so I wonder what else he'll do in this new series.

Klopp looks exactly like how I pictured him in my mind!! They said if Volger is Alek's dad, then Klopp is like his mom. Which is very fair but also made me laugh a lot.

Dr. Barlow!! She looks amazing. There was a lot of talk about the dynamic between her and Volger and how they're often playing mental chess games with each other. I'm really glad they're leaning into that dynamic.

And one more concept art:

This looks like the visit to Istanbul, which I'm desperately hoping means we'll see my favorite chaotic bisexual, Lilit.

That's all of the photos I have! They also showed us a preview of the show plus a live performance of the ending song with Diana Garnet. No video recording was allowed and I don't break rules, but believe me when I tell you it was stunning. The world feels so full of life and adventure and I can't wait to see the final show.

Tbh I was too busy holding back tears of joy but one thing I remember distinctly is there's a shot of Sharp getting ready for the day, and we see a sheet of paper with a bunch of names written and crossed out before finally (I think) "Dylan" is circled.

Which actually brings me to the Q&A part. TLDR, between the use of "Sharp" for Deryn's name, Scott referring to Sharp as "she/he/they" during the panel, and the scene I mentioned earlier, I feel really hopeful about how they're approaching Deryn's gender and identity in this adaptation.

I asked a question about this at the Q&A and voice recorded it, so I'll try to transcribe it here as best I can because the audio is not great lol. I stumbled through my question so I trimmed it down here but I'll transcribe the response as clearly as I can!

Me: I just finished re-reading [the series] for the first time since I was probably in high school, and one of the things that interests me about this adaptation is the approach to Sharp's character... I guess I'm just interested, like, was there a lot of thought put behind, or what kind of thought was put behind how to approach their character in the anime, I guess as a chance to re-approach the story however many years after it was originally written.

Scott Westerfeld: Yeah, there's a lot to that. The "girl dressing as a boy" as a trope was something completely different in 2007 when I started writing this than it is now. And so we really approached Deryn's identity as what was at stake rather than just... rather than just her being in disguise, it's about their recreating themselves and becoming a different person and transitioning and, and so... but it's always been interesting to me that the words that I wrote back in 2009, 10, 11, y'know, as an old guy who grew up in Texas in the 70s - who was David Bowie fan! - but otherwise didn't have a lot of access into issues of gender, I'm amazed at how many people have been [able to?] adopt Deryn/Dylan as one of their own. I just got an email a week ago from a trans boy whose chosen name is Dylan. So it is amazing to me how whatever imperfections or whatever problematics there are in the text, people still find their way into what they need from a character. And as a writer, I can say that I always respected that character, I always respected their choices, I always respected who they were. I never tried to stick them into a dress and have everyone go "Ooh now you're pretty 'because 'cause you're in dress!" We didn't do that, and I think that what may be important for people and I think that's why it's still what's gonna work here, but it's been fun to be able to update it and everybody on the team's been really great about understanding that.

TLDR I don't want to get anyone's hopes up too high, but I'm really appreciative of the care that's being taken with Sharp's story and identity in this adaptation. It seems like Scott and the others on the team are taking that into account, and I'm excited to see how it plays out.

Other random things I remember:

THERE WAS AN ALEK COSPLAYER. I took a photo with them but I won't post it without their consent. Just trust that they looked fantastic.

Scott said one of the first things he was told was that Alek can't actually kill Nikola Tesla because he's too well loved by people in Japan, which I think is the funniest possible reason for a change to be made in an adaptation.

Diana Garnet (they/any) mentioned how much they love Sharp (don't we all) and also how they used to work at a Barnes and Noble and remembers selling lots of Westerfeld books!

Scott said his approach in writing Leviathan was taking everything he'd always wanted to write about and basically throwing it together, because he was just coming off of the success of Uglies and figured he could get away with it.

If I remember anything else I'll add on to this post! Overall, it was a wonderful panel and I'm incredibly excited for this project.

[winternet-s]

CAMPING IS FOR FALLING IN LOVE, ( r.miyagi )

، ✶ 🍚 ¿ ¡ ✷ we could stay out late until the sun sets past eight 𖤛 ⋆ 🧻 𖥉

summary : After Shohoku’s big win, you invite the team to your family’s camping site for a night under the stars. It’s supposed to be all fun and games—until Ryota Miyagi sees his chance to finally confess his feelings for you. With the fire crackling and the team teasing, he’s ready to open up… if his nerves (and Sakuragi's ego) don’t get in the way first.

notes : i loved writing that as u can tell sakuragi is my favorite 😔 plus be patient for misunderstood i'm trying to make the chapter long and bro it is hard !

warnings : slow burn - christian values and i think that's it

cw: 9,6k

━━━ 𝓘t was when the final whistle blows that the crowd exploded in noises. And it was at that exact moment that you felt yourself breathing, not even noticing that you were holding it. Every Shohoku player present on the court was drowned by their own sweat, still trying to catch their breath before finally erupting in cheers that seemed to shake the very ground beneath them. Their voices rise in unison—triumphant shouts, laughter, and cries of victory filling the air. High-fives, fist pumps, and backslaps are exchanged, the adrenaline still coursing through their veins.

The public join in, their cheers merging with the players’, a deafening roar that surges like a wave through the stands. Banners are waved, chants grow louder, and the entire gym is alive with the electric buzz of success. It’s a moment of pure euphoria—one born of hard work, determination, and the thrill of knowing they’ve earned their victory.

"They truly did an amazing job," you couldn't stop the smile that was spreading on your face , your eyes still absorbed by the team's excitement. "And Sakuragi seems to improve day by day! Every game, he’s improving—faster, sharper. It’s like he’s finding his rhythm, piece by piece" Your eyes lingered on the red-head proclaiming himself as a genius.

Kakuta shot you a grin, waving his hand dismissively. “You’re being way too nice, [Name],” he chuckled, leaning back with a teasing gleam in his eye. “He was just lucky!” His voice was light, playful, but you could tell he wasn’t totally serious—just ribbing Sakuragi the way he always did.

You awkwardly laughed while remembering a few scenes where Sakuragi was — embarrassing because of his ego — clearing your throat you continued, "Don't erase the fact that he's improving quite fast, you did a good job bringing him in the club Haruko!"

The brunette standing beside you flushed at the compliment, waving her hands in front of her modestly. “Oh, no, no!” Haruko shook her head, smiling shyly. "I didn’t really do much… he’s the one putting in all the effort." She glanced over at Sakuragi, her admiration for his determination clear, though she was far too humble to take credit for it.

At that very moment, out of the corner of your eye, you saw Sakuragi’s ears comically stretch and perk up like radar dishes, locking onto the sound of praise. His whole posture straightened up, and a huge, triumphant grin spread across his face.

“Nya-hahaha! Did you hear that, Ryo-chin?” Hanamichi’s booming voice cut through the conversation, puffing out his chest dramatically. “I’m improving fast! I’ve always been a genius, but even [name] can’t deny it anymore!”

Ryota groaned, glaring at him, while Sakuragi swaggered over to his teammates, throwing an arm over Ryota’s shoulders with exaggerated confidence. “You better catch up, little man, or I’ll be the star of this team in no time! You’re lucky to witness my greatness.”

The rest of the team exchanged amused glances, all too used to Sakuragi’s over-the-top ego boosts. Ryota shot you a look, half exasperated, half playful. "See what you started?" he said with a smirk, shaking his head.

You could only laugh at the scene, the red head antics were impossible to not laugh at and Ryota’s exasperated groans were impossible not to find amusing. Completely caught up in the moment, you didn’t notice the way Ryota’s gaze lingered on you, his eyes softening as he admired the way your laugh lit up your face. But underneath that fondness, a small twinge of jealousy tugged at his chest. He couldn’t help but feel a little envious of the affection you seemed to have for Sakuragi, even if he knew it was just playful.

"How about me, [Name]?" Ryota asked, his brown eyes sparkling with a playful glint, but beneath the surface, there was a light note of hope. Not that you caught it.

"You make the point guard position look so effortless," you replied, smiling brightly. "You’re so fast and agile. Plus, you do look really cool while playing, Ryo-chin!"

At your words, Ryota's face broke into a wide, giddy grin. His whole demeanor shifted, as if he couldn’t contain his excitement. "Cool? Did you hear that?" He mimicked Hanamichi's earlier boasting, lightly bouncing on his feet. "She thinks I’m cool! Oh, man! I'm on fire today!"

His exaggerated, playful reaction earned a sweat drop from his teammates, masking the way his heart actually leapt at your words. He ran a hand through his hair in mock arrogance, hiding any trace of the hope that had been there a moment ago. "Looks like I’m winning on and off the court!"

Excitement filled your body from head to toe, a positive energy coursing through you. You let your feet carry towards the players, , the source of that joy. The noise of the gym swirled around you laughter, shouts, the slap of high-fives, but your focus was ahead, where the team stood, basking in the aftermath of their triumph.

Haruko by your side reflected your enthusiasm, taking your arm in hers, a soft smile on her face as the two of you closed the distance.

Once close enough you called for them, “Hey, guys!” The players paused, turning their attention to you. “I wanted to invite all of you to my family’s camping site this weekend! It’ll be a great way to celebrate the win and bond a little more.” You announced.

A collective murmur of curiosity rippled through the team, and you could see the surprise on their faces. Hanamichi’s eyes widened in excitement. “A genius like me deserves a break after this exceptional performance!” Hanamichi puffed out his chest, grinning widely as if the entire match had hinged on his skills alone.

Clearing your throat you deviated your gaze on the others.

"My family owns a camping site, and with the summer holidays coming up, I thought it would be, um, a good idea, you know? Like, we could all go and, uh, hang out, maybe? I mean, it’s a really nice spot—there’s a lake and everything! We could have bonfires, or maybe… I don’t know, roast marshmallows? Or, uh, play some games? If everyone’s free, of course! I just thought it’d be fun, especially after all the hard work you guys have put in… but if it’s too much, that’s okay, too! And with Anzai's agreement too-"

Suddenly, you caught yourself rambling, the words spilling out in a rush as you felt heat creeping up your cheeks. You stopped short, laughter bubbling in your throat. “Wow, I’m really going off there, huh?”

Ayako who once was speechless found herself amused by your antics and approached you. “You’re fine! It sounds like a great idea!” She nudged you gently, her eyes sparkling with amusement.

Haruko chimed in with a warm smile, “Honestly, you just made it sound even more fun! Who wouldn’t want to roast marshmallows and hang out by a lake?”

You let out a relieved laugh, grateful for their encouragement. The tension eased, and you felt a little more confident about your invitation.

From the corner of your eye, you caught Ryota who was drinking water, a teasing grin on his face. “Oh, come on! Who wouldn’t want to spend a weekend with all of you?” he chimed in, his tone playful. “It’ll be a whole new adventure for the rest of the team!”

He paused, glancing at Hanamichi, who was enthusiastically pumping his fists in the air. “Except for Hanamichi, of course. He’ll be the one leading us into trouble, trying to wrestle bears or something.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the image. Just then, Mitsui walked over, Rukawa following closely behind, catching the tail end of the conversation. “Yeah, Ryota’s right,” Mitsui chimed in with a grin. “I can already see it: Hanamichi trying to show off, and we end up in the middle of the forest because he thought he could talk to a raccoon.”

Rukawa only nodded to the shooting guard's statement. Hanamichi pouted dramatically, crossing his arms. “You guys are just jealous of my camping skills! You’ll see, I’ll be the best camper ever!”

The room filled with laughter, the sound ringing off the walls and creating a warm, cheerful atmosphere. Your heart swelled as you looked around at your friends, their faces illuminated with excitement and joy. It was moments like these that made everything feel right.

“Oh thank you Lord! it’s settled then! A camping trip it is!” you declared, your voice ringing with determination. A broad smile spread across your face as you beamed at everyone, your spirit infectious. “And I’ll invite Anzai-sensei too! He can help keep things under control with Hanamichi around.”

The thought made everyone chuckle again, and you felt a flutter of anticipation. You continued, “And we can’t forget to invite Sakuragi’s gang! They’ll bring their own brand of chaos, but it’ll be fun!”

As you spoke, a wave of excitement swept through the group, eyes lighting up with eagerness at the prospect of the adventure. The anticipation in the air was electric, each person feeling the thrill of what was to come. You imagined the nights filled with stories around a campfire, the laughter echoing through the trees, and the bond of friendship growing stronger.

The team cheered at the idea, their voices melding together in a joyful chorus that filled the space around you. As you took in the happy faces, your heart swelled with warmth. This was the start of something special, a weekend filled with adventure, friendship, and unforgettable memories. You couldn’t wait for the camping trip to arrive, knowing it would bring you all even closer together.

-

After that day you sure couldn't handle your excitement the d-day was approaching and you wanted to make sure, everything was perfect and that everyone would feel comfortable. Armed with a notebook and a pen you dove into a planning determined to make it unforgettable, but also eager to make a balanced schedule mixing fun and relaxation.

You spent hours crafting the perfect itinerary. There would be nature hikes in the morning, where the team could explore the surrounding woods and enjoy the fresh air. You made sure to highlight the best trails and included some scenic spots for group photos. For the afternoons, you planned various activities—friendly competitions, like a three-on-three basketball game, followed by a team-building challenge that would push everyone to work together.

"Okay perfect! Now the meals .."

But you didn’t stop there. You knew that a camping trip wouldn’t be complete without some delicious meals. You mapped out the menu with care, balancing easy-to-cook meals with everyone’s preferences. For the first night, you decided on a classic campfire dinner: hot dogs and veggie skewers, followed by s'mores for dessert. The next day, you planned a hearty breakfast of pancakes and fruit, ensuring everyone had enough energy for the day ahead.

Staring at your planning you couldn't deny the proud feeling that you had at the moment, you were excited not only for the trip but also to spend time with your friends out of a formal place, away from the pressures of basketball practice and school.

The day you finally shared your meticulously organized plan with the team, their faces lit up with enthusiasm. “Wow, [Name], you really went all out!” Haruko exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “This sounds amazing!”

Kogure, always the supportive friend, nodded vigorously. “Seriously! You’ve thought of everything. It’ll be a great way to bond as a team!”

Even Akagi, the usually stoic captain, couldn’t hide a smile. “This will help us build camaraderie off the court. Good job, [Name].” His praise made your heart swell with pride.

Ryota chimed in, “You’ve really put in the effort, and I appreciate that. This is going to be epic!”

But then, your excitement was interrupted by a wave of worry. “Like this, though—no surprises if someone doesn’t feel comfortable with some activities or…” You paused, suddenly flustered. “Wait, is any of you allergic to something or—” Your rambling turned into a cascade of concerns. “I didn’t ask about food allergies! What if someone can’t eat the hot dogs? Or if we go swimming and someone has a phobia of lakes? Oh no, what if Hanamichi tries to wrestle a bear and gets hurt?”

The words tumbled out before you could stop yourself, and you could feel heat creeping up your cheeks. You stopped short, a nervous laugh escaping your lips. “Wow, I’m really going off again ..?”

At the mention of bears, Hanamichi’s eyes lit up dramatically. “Wrestle a bear?! Pfft! I could take on ten bears at once!” He puffed out his chest, striking a heroic pose as he flexed his arms. “I’ll show them who’s the real king of the jungle!”

Everyone else stared at him, trying to suppress laughter. Ryota couldn’t help but roll his eyes, a smirk creeping onto his face. “Right, because bears are totally scared of an overgrown monkey like you. Plus bears don’t live in the jungle idiot!"

Hanamichi waved his hand dismissively, undeterred.

You couldn’t help but burst into laughter at his antics, the tension easing away as you watched the absurdity unfold. Ryota chuckled softly beside you, his expression a mix of amusement and fondness.

“Hey, don’t worry, [Name]. I’m sure everyone will be fine. Just ask them, and we’ll figure it out together,” he reassured you, his warm demeanor making you feel a little better. You remained oblivious to the way his eyes softened as he watched you.

“It’ll be an adventure, and we’ll all look out for each other, right?” you said, still giggling over Hanamichi’s theatrics.

As the laughter died down, Ayako’s gaze shifted between you and Ryota. A knowing smile crept onto her lips as she watched the way Ryota’s expression softened when he looked at you. There was a spark of something special in his eyes, a warmth that hadn’t gone unnoticed by her. She nudged Kogure, who was busy trying to stifle a laugh at Hanamichi’s antics.

“Do you see that? He’s totally into her,” Ayako murmured, a mischievous smile tugging at her lips.

Kogure chuckled softly, nodding. “Yeah, it’s been pretty obvious for a while now. But I think [Name]’s completely oblivious.”

Hanamichi, still hamming up his imaginary bear-wrestling scene, overheard just enough of their conversation to catch on. His ears perked up, and with a dramatic pivot, he pointed at Ryota and shouted, “Wait, what? Ryota likes [Name]?!”

The sudden outburst drew the entire group’s attention, including yours, though you didn’t quite catch what he said. Ryota’s face flushed bright red, and he turned on his heel to face Hanamichi, already regretting everything about this moment.

“Sakuragi! Shut up!” Ryota hissed, glaring at him. “You’re way too loud!”

But Hanamichi was already rolling with it, puffing out his chest as if he were some great mastermind. “I got it! I’ll help you win her over! Leave it to me—the great Hanamichi Sakuragi! This will be the greatest play of my life!” His eyes gleamed with determination as if he were planning some sort of heroic moment.

Kogure and Ayako exchanged amused glances, knowing where this was headed.

“Oh no, no, no,” Ryota groaned, rubbing the back of his neck. “I don’t need your help, Sakuragi. Really, I’ve got this.”

But Hanamichi wasn’t backing down. He threw a confident arm around Ryota’s shoulder, giving him a hearty shake. “Trust me, Ryota! I’ll come up with the perfect plan! Like, you could rescue [Name] from something dangerous! Maybe a bear!”

Ayako burst out laughing at that, and Kogure covered his mouth to hide his grin. The others were already chuckling, but Hanamichi’s next comment sent everyone over the edge.

“Yeah! Ryota will save [Name] from a bear! And then, when she’s all impressed, he’ll confess his feelings!” Hanamichi was so caught up in his fantasy that he missed Ryota’s growing look of horror.

But then, Hanamichi’s face twisted as he suddenly processed his own words. “Wait... hold on!” he exclaimed, looking deeply offended as if a great injustice had been done. “Why is Ryota the one wrestling the bear?! Everyone knows I’m the strongest one here! If anyone’s gonna fight a bear, it’s gonna be me!”

He stood tall, puffing his chest out even more, as if the idea that someone else might handle the dangerous task was an insult to his abilities.

Mitsui snorted from the side, shaking his head. “Hanamichi, you do know no one’s actually fighting a bear, right?”

“Yeah,” Rukawa added coolly, barely looking up from where he was sitting. “You’d lose.”

“WHAT?!” Hanamichi whipped around to face him, fists clenched, his face turning red with fury. “I’d never lose to a bear! I’d have it pinned in seconds! Don’t you dare underestimate the great Hanamichi Sakuragi!”

The rest of the team erupted in laughter, completely caught up in Hanamichi’s wild overreaction. Even you couldn’t help but laugh, though you still weren’t sure why everyone was talking about wrestling bears all of a sudden.

Meanwhile, Ryota stood there, his face buried in his hands as he tried to recover from the whole embarrassing scene. “This is a disaster…” he muttered.

Ayako, ever the observant one, saw the way Ryota’s flustered demeanor shifted slightly whenever you laughed, his eyes lighting up at the sound. She nudged Hanamichi playfully. “Maybe you should save the bear wrestling for the professionals, Sakuragi. It sounds like Ryota has his own plan.”

Hanamichi huffed, crossing his arms in a pout. “Yeah, well, whatever. Just don’t come crying to me when Ryota messes it up!”

Ryota glared at him, then shot a quick, almost shy glance in your direction. “I won’t mess it up, you idiot…”

Completely oblivious to the undercurrent of teasing and tension, you let out another laugh. “Well, let’s just hope no one has to wrestle any bears during the camping trip, right?”

Hanamichi puffed up again. “Don’t worry! If there’s a bear, I’ll take it down in one punch!”

"Stop with that bear thing!"

The excited buzz from the team planning session lingered in the air as you gathered your things, still feeling the high energy of the conversation. Once the final details were ironed out, you couldn’t help but feel a bit of pride for putting it all together. But as you packed away your notes, you noticed Hanamichi hovering near the door, his arms crossed in a self-assured stance.

“I’ll walk you home, [Name],” he announced, a grin on his face as if it was the most natural thing in the world.

“Since when did I need you to walk me home, genius?” you teased, your tone light.

He puffed out his chest, clearly enjoying his role as the self-proclaimed protector. “Since always!"

You rolled your eyes with a smile, falling into step beside him as the two of you exited the gym. The cool evening breeze brushed against your skin, and the distant hum of the town’s nightlife filled the space between your playful banter.

As you walked, you found your mind wandering back to the camping trip, thoughts of the logistics and details creeping back in. “I just hope everything goes smoothly,” you muttered aloud, almost to yourself. “What if someone doesn’t like the activities, or—oh, no, I didn’t ask about food allergies! What if someone’s allergic to the marshmallows or the hot dogs?”

Hanamichi gave you a sidelong glance, noticing the shift in your tone from excitement to concern. He shook his head in mock frustration. “You’re overthinking it again. It’s just camping, not a battle plan. Besides, if anything goes wrong, I’ll take care of it. I am a genius, after all.”

You let out a laugh, his confidence impossible to ignore. “Yeah, because when it comes to problem-solving, I’m sure ‘Hanamichi Sakuragi: the genuis’ is exactly the kind of help we’ll need.”

Without missing a beat, Hanamichi puffed up his chest, striking a mock-heroic pose. “Of course! Nya-hahahaha!” His voice boomed with exaggerated bravado, making you giggle.

“Sure you will,” you replied with a playful eye roll, though your smile never left your face.

Despite his usual loud and overconfident manner, there was a sense of comfort that came with having Hanamichi around. He had been by your side for years, your childhood friend who always made sure to walk you home—even if he made a show of it. And while he talked big, you knew he meant it when he said he’d always look out for you.

As the two of you walked in companionable silence, the streetlights casting soft glows along the sidewalk, Hanamichi suddenly spoke up again, his tone less playful this time. “You’re always putting everyone else first, you know. Like with this camping trip—you’re making sure everything’s perfect for us. But don’t forget to take care of yourself too.”

You blinked, taken aback by his unexpected sincerity. “Since when did you get all wise on me?” you teased, trying to lighten the mood, but his words had hit home.

Hanamichi shrugged, glancing away as if embarrassed by the sentiment. “I’m always wise,” he said, though the usual bravado was missing from his voice. “Just… don’t overwork yourself, alright? We’ll all have a good time no matter what.”

The warmth in your chest grew, touched by his words. “Thanks, Hanamichi. I guess I needed to hear that.”

“Of course! I’m a genius at everything, including pep talks,” he declared, back to his usual over-the-top self. “Just leave it to me. And no more worrying about it, got it?”

You couldn’t help but smile at him, grateful for the way he always seemed to know when you needed a little reassurance, even if he disguised it with humor. “Got it,” you replied softly.

As you reached your doorstep, Hanamichi stopped and gave you a small, sincere smile. “Alright, see you tomorrow! And remember—if a bear shows up, just call me. I’ll handle it.”

“Goodnight, bear wrestler,” you joked, waving him off.

With a final thumbs-up, Hanamichi turned and walked off into the night, leaving you with a lighter heart and the comforting knowledge that you weren’t alone in organizing this trip. Even if he was always a little dramatic, Hanamichi’s loyalty and friendship had always been unwavering.

-

The late afternoon sun bathed the street market in a warm, golden glow as the three of you continued your search for the last few items on your list. You were absorbed in picking out sunscreen and other camping essentials, humming quietly to yourself as you compared brands. Hanamichi and Ryota, on the other hand, had found themselves falling behind, distracted by the various street vendors and the usual chaos around them.

Hanamichi, ever the loud one, was grabbing random things from stalls and examining them with exaggerated curiosity. “What do you think of this hat?” he asked, plopping a wide-brimmed sunhat on Ryota’s head. “Too much?”

Ryota rolled his eyes, pulling the hat off. “Yeah, I don’t think that’s the look I’m going for.”

You glanced back, smiling at their antics. “Guys, focus! We still need to find a few more things for the trip.”

But even as you busied yourself with the task, Ryota’s mind was somewhere else. He kept glancing over at stalls, his eyes catching on various trinkets and gifts, trying to think of the perfect thing to get you. Something that showed how much he cared, something that was personal.

As they walked on, Hanamichi noticed Ryota’s distracted expression and smirked. “Oi, Ryo-chin, what’s with the face? You look like you’re trying to solve a mystery or something.”

Ryota blinked, snapping back to reality. “What? Oh, nothing, just… thinking.”

Hanamichi raised an eyebrow, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a knowing smile. “You’re thinking about getting something for [Name], aren’t you?”

Ryota rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, trying to play it cool. “Maybe. Just something small, you know? Something that’d mean something to her.”

Hanamichi’s smirk softened into a more serious expression as they walked. For all his bravado and loud personality, when it came to you, Hanamichi knew a lot more than he let on. After all, you were his childhood friend—someone he had known for years, someone he cared about deeply, even if he didn’t always show it.

“I get it,” Hanamichi said, glancing over at you as you sifted through a stall. “She’s always been the type to put everyone else first, y’know? When we were kids, she’d give up her snacks if someone didn’t have any, or spend hours helping with homework even when she had her own to do. She’s always thinking about others, making sure they’re okay.”

Ryota listened intently, surprised at how sincere Hanamichi sounded. “Yeah… I’ve noticed that about her.”

“And,” Hanamichi continued, his voice dropping slightly, “her faith’s a big part of that. She doesn’t talk about it all the time, but it’s there. It’s why she’s always looking out for people, why she worries about things like whether everyone’s comfortable, if we’re all taken care of. It’s just how she is.”

Ryota blinked, taking that in. “Her faith, huh?”

Hanamichi nodded. “She’s a Christian. It’s not something she pushes on people, but it’s important to her. When things got tough, like when her mom was sick a while back, her faith was what got her through it. I mean, she didn’t say it outright, but you could tell. She’d go to church, pray… It helps her stay grounded, I think.”

Ryota’s gaze flickered toward you as you chatted with a vendor, unaware of the conversation happening behind you. “I didn’t realize it was that big a part of her life.”

“Well, now you do,” Hanamichi said, his tone more serious than usual. “So, if you’re thinking of getting her something, maybe keep that in mind.”

Just then, Ryota’s eyes landed on a small stall displaying Christian jewelry—a collection of crosses, pendants, and simple charms. Something clicked in his mind as he spotted a delicate silver cross, its design simple but elegant. It was perfect.

Before Ryota could respond, though, they were interrupted by the sudden arrival of Sakuragi’s gang. Yohei, Ookusu, and Noma approached with their usual casual swagger, carrying bags of their own. Yohei raised a hand in greeting. “Hey, Hanamichi! Ryota! Looks like you’re stocking up for the trip, too.”

Ryota smiled and nodded. “Yeah, just getting some last-minute stuff.”

Yohei glanced between the two of them, then at you, still distracted with your shopping. He leaned in closer to Hanamichi, smirking. “So, what’s this about Ryota trying to impress [Name]?”

Hanamichi, of course, couldn’t resist the opportunity to tease. “Ryo-chin here is trying to find the perfect gift, something that’ll sweep [Name] off her feet. But he’s a little nervous.”

Ryota’s face flushed as he elbowed Hanamichi. “Shut up! I’m just… trying to get her something thoughtful.”

Yohei chuckled. “Sounds like someone’s got it bad.”

“Don’t worry,” Hanamichi added, “I’m sure she’ll love whatever you get her. Just don’t overthink it.”

As the group laughed and joked around, Ryota slipped away for a moment, returning to the jewelry stall. He bought the silver cross and the small leather-bound notebook, feeling a sense of satisfaction as he tucked them into his bag. They were simple gifts, but they carried meaning—something personal, something that connected to her faith, her love for others, and the way she always put everyone before herself.

When he returned to the group, you were finally finished with your shopping. You smiled at everyone, your arms full of bags. “Thanks for waiting, guys. I think we’ve got everything we need now.”

Hanamichi grinned. “You bet! And I made sure Ryo-chin didn’t buy anything too ridiculous.”

You laughed, not noticing the way Ryota’s gaze lingered on you for just a second longer. His heart raced, but he managed to keep his cool. He’d give you the gifts later, when the moment was right. For now, he joined in the banter, keeping things light and easy, but knowing deep down that the trip would be the perfect chance to show you how much he cared.

-

The day had finally arrived. Similar to the nergy that you were giving, the sun was bright and warm, casting golden hues over the camping site. As you stood in the middle of the grassy clearing, taking in the calm before the chaos. The supplies neatly organized, and everything you had spent the past few days preparing was in place—food, sunscreen, even a first-aid kit, just in case.

You took a deep breath, feeling the slight tinge of excitement and nervousness dancing in your chest. Everything was ready—the only thing missing now was the team, Sakuragi’s gang, and your friends.

And there you could hear the faint sound of voices and laughs echoing. Moments later, the familiar figures of your friends emerged from the trees, with Haruko and Hanamichi in the lead both were conversing - he looks giddy, you thought with a small smile.

Until his eyes fell on you, "Hey, [Name]!” Hanamichi’s voice boomed across the field as he waved, already hyped up. “The genius has arrived! I hope you’re ready for the best camping trip of your life!”

You couldn’t help but smile at his energy, waving back. Behind him, Yohei and the rest of his gang followed, along with Ryota, Ayako, and the rest of the Shohoku team. Everyone seemed in high spirits, their excitement contagious.

“Hello everyone!” you called out, stepping forward to greet them. “I’m so glad you all made it! You’ll see camping isn’t as boring as people make it look! My family’s camping site is the best! We have everything—a beautiful lake, hiking trails, and my dad always has the best stories to tell around the campfire!”

You felt your excitement bubbling over as you continued, “I mean, we have great food! My dad makes the best hot dogs and s'mores, and the scenery is amazing! It’s the perfect place to unwind and just enjoy nature. You’ll see—there’s no way this is going to be boring! I mean, who wouldn’t want to spend a weekend camping with the best team ever? It’s going to be epic!”

As you rambled on, you noticed the team exchanging amused glances, a few sweat drops forming as they struggled to keep straight faces. Ayako stepped forward, her smile wide and playful. “Okay, okay, we get it! Your dad is amazing, and the food will be great. Just promise us you won’t keep talking about it all weekend, alright?”

You cleared your throat before apologizing.

Hanamichi crossed his arms, feigning annoyance. “Honestly, you sound like you’re trying to sell us on this camping trip! I get it; your dad’s great, but don’t make us feel bad about our own camping skills!”

Ryota, who had been leaning against a tree, watched you with a soft smile that spoke volumes. “I could listen to you ramble about your family’s camping site all day, [Name].” His voice was sincere, his brown eyes sparkling as they met yours. “It’s really great to see how passionate you are about this.”

You blinked, caught off guard. “Thanks, Ryota! I just want everyone to enjoy themselves.”

He nodded earnestly, a hint of a blush on his cheeks. “It really shows how much you care about everyone having a good time.”

You tilted your head, puzzled. “Uh, thanks? But, I mean, isn’t that what friends do?”

“Of course!” he replied, but his tone was slightly more eager, causing Hanamichi to smirk and glance at him knowingly.

“Looks like someone’s a bit lovestruck,” Hanamichi teased, crossing his arms with a grin.

You were oblivious to the undercurrent of teasing. “So, are we going to set up the tents or what?” you asked, trying to steer the conversation back on track.

“Right!” Ayako chimed in, clapping her hands together. “Let’s get started! The sooner we set up, the sooner we can enjoy the rest of the day!”

As the team began to move towards the area designated for the tents, you couldn’t shake off the feeling that Ryota was acting a bit different, but you shrugged it off and focused on the excitement of the camping trip ahead.

-

As the sun hung high in the sky, casting a warm glow over the campsite, you could feel the excitement bubbling in the air. "Alright, everyone! For our first activity, we’re going to set up the tents!” you announced, your voice ringing out above the chatter of your friends. The team gathered around, their faces lighting up with anticipation. “But here’s the twist! We’re going to see who can set theirs up the fastest! The winners get first dibs on the food tonight!”

The response was immediate—a chorus of enthusiastic cheers erupted from the team, filling the clearing with a sense of camaraderie and competition. Hanamichi, ever the dramatist, puffed out his chest, eyes gleaming with determination. “I’ll show you all how it’s done! No one can beat the great Sakuragi!” He struck a pose, hands on his hips, and a wide grin plastered across his face. Laughter followed, light and infectious, as the rest of the team playfully rolled their eyes.

“Just try not to trip over the tent poles this time, okay?” you teased, recalling past camping mishaps where Hanamichi’s enthusiasm had led to comical disasters. He huffed in response, his pride wounded but only momentarily.

Your father stepped forward, arms crossed with a knowing smile, clearly enjoying the banter. “So, who’s going to lead this expedition into the wilderness?” he asked, his tone teasing as he directed his gaze at Hanamichi, who stood with exaggerated confidence.

“Me!” Hanamichi shouted, puffing out his chest further as he embraced the moment. “I’m a camping genius!”

Your father raised an eyebrow, amusement sparkling in his eyes. “A genius, huh? Last I checked, you almost set our tent on fire during that camping trip when you were younger. What was it you said? ‘I can make fire like a pro’?” His laughter was contagious, and soon the entire team joined in, memories of Hanamichi’s previous escapades bringing about a flood of fond chuckles.

Hanamichi’s cheeks flushed a bright shade of red, indignation clear in his voice. “Hey! That was one time! And I still managed to help with the marshmallows!” He crossed his arms, trying to appear tough despite the laughter directed at him.

As the team began sorting out their tent supplies, you noticed Ryota standing a little off to the side, brow furrowed in concentration as he prepared his gear. He looked so determined, and you found it kind of cute. Before you could dwell on it, your father leaned closer, voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “You know, it’s nice to see everyone so excited, especially Ryota. He seems to be quite taken with you,” he said, glancing knowingly in Ryota’s direction.

You blinked in surprise, turning to follow your father’s gaze. Ryota was deep in conversation with Mitsui, laughter ringing out as they joked about the competition ahead. You shrugged off your father’s comment, genuinely oblivious to any underlying feelings. “What do you mean? We’re just friends!” you replied, waving your hand dismissively.

Your father chuckled softly, clearly enjoying the moment. “Sure, if you say so,” he replied, but the glint in his eye indicated that he wasn’t convinced. “Just keep an eye on him. You never know when a boy might start taking a special interest in his childhood friend.”

You shook your head, still not quite understanding. “We’re all just here to have fun camping together!” With that, you clapped your hands together, rallying the group’s focus. “Okay, everyone! Let’s get those tents set up!”

With a rallying cry, the teams scattered, each group diving into their supplies with enthusiasm. You joined your friends, the sound of laughter and chatter swirling around you like a warm blanket. Hanamichi immediately grabbed a pile of tent poles, launching himself into the project with reckless abandon, while Ryota moved methodically, glancing around to ensure everything was going smoothly.

Your father watched the scene unfold with amusement, a smile spreading across his face. “Looks like some are better at basketball than camping,” he joked, shaking his head. You could feel a wave of warmth at his support and encouragement, even amidst the light-hearted teasing.

As you positioned your tent, your eyes drifted toward Ryota. He was deep in conversation with Mitsui, animatedly discussing strategies for setting up their tent. You felt a flutter of admiration at the way he commanded the attention of his teammates, but it was a simple appreciation. The thought that he might have deeper feelings for you didn’t cross your mind.

“Alright, everyone! Time to see who can get their tent up the fastest! And remember, there are prizes at stake!” your father called out, igniting a spark of competitiveness among the group. Cheers erupted from the team, ready to tackle the challenge.

With your team in high spirits, you felt a sense of pride swell within you—not just for the tents that would stand tall by the end of the day, but for the bonds being strengthened in this beautiful outdoor setting. The laughter, the camaraderie, and the warmth of shared moments filled you with happiness.

As the tents began to take shape, you couldn’t help but smile at the chaotic yet joyful scene before you. This camping trip was going to be unforgettable, and you were determined to make the most of every moment.

The sun was shining brightly overhead, casting dappled shadows on the forest floor as you stood at the center of the campsite, ready to kick off the next activity. The group had just finished setting up their tents, and the excitement in the air was palpable. You gathered everyone around, heart racing a little as you prepared to explain the rules of the scavenger hunt organized by your father.

“Okay, everyone!” you called out, waving your hands to get everyone’s attention. “We’re about to start the scavenger hunt! My dad is leading this one, and he has set up a great list of items for you to find. This will be a fun way to explore the area and work together!”

As you looked around, you spotted Kogure, Haruko, Ryota, and Yohei in your group. Their eager expressions reassured you that the day was shaping up to be a blast. “The rules are simple. Each group will have to find a series of items from the list my dad created. The first group to find everything wins!”

Just then, your father appeared, holding a clipboard and sporting a grin that radiated excitement. “Remember, teamwork is key! Make sure to stay together and watch out for one another. There’s a little prize for the winning group, so I expect you all to give it your best!”

You couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride at your dad’s enthusiasm. He glanced at you and winked, and you felt warmth spreading through your chest. But then he added, teasingly, “And no slacking off, Ryota! I know how you like to zone out when [Name] is around!”

You felt your cheeks heat up at his comment, glancing quickly at Ryota, who looked a bit sheepish but was clearly amused. He caught your eye, and you both exchanged a brief, nervous smile. For a moment, the atmosphere felt charged, but you shook your head to clear your thoughts, determined to stay focused.

“Alright, let’s get started!” you said, trying to bring the energy back up. “Kogure, Haruko, you two can help keep us organized! Ready, set, go!”

With a whoop, the group burst into motion. As you led the way, you began to feel a mix of excitement and nerves. Your father’s teasing comment lingered in your mind, making you acutely aware of Ryota walking beside you. You tried to shake off the feeling, focusing instead on the scavenger hunt.

“Okay, our first items are a red leaf and a smooth stone,” you announced, glancing at your list. “Let’s head toward that cluster of trees over there!”

As you navigated through the underbrush, you could feel Ryota’s presence next to you, and it both comforted and flustered you. He seemed to be scanning the ground intently, clearly focused on finding the items. You couldn’t help but admire his determination, which only heightened the butterflies in your stomach.

“Look! There’s a red leaf!” you exclaimed, pointing toward a particularly vibrant one hanging from a low branch.

“Nice spot!” Ryota replied, smiling as you both rushed over. Just as you reached for the leaf, your fingers brushed against his, sending an unexpected jolt through you. You quickly withdrew your hand, your heart racing for reasons you couldn’t quite understand.

You focused on the scavenger hunt to distract yourself, but it wasn’t easy. As you gathered the leaf, your father’s earlier comment echoed in your mind. Ryota was genuinely trying to help, but you found yourself feeling increasingly awkward around him.

As the group continued to search for items, you caught Haruko and Kogure gathering a few items in the distance. You felt proud of your team, but your mind kept drifting back to Ryota, who was trying to help you with the scavenger hunt. He noticed your distracted behavior and gently nudged your arm.

“Hey, are you alright?” he asked, his voice low and concerned.

“Yeah, I’m fine!” you replied too quickly, forcing a bright smile. You could feel your cheeks warming, but you tried to brush it off. “Just thinking about what we need to find next.”

Ryota looked at you with a knowing expression. “You sure? You seem a little… lost in thought.”

“Oh! Um, well, it’s just that we need to find a smooth stone now, and—” Your voice trailed off as you searched for something to say to divert the conversation from your swirling thoughts.

Before you could say more, Kogure’s voice broke through the moment. “Hey! Look what we found!” He waved a bright green feather, and Haruko held up an oddly shaped rock, both of them beaming with pride.

“That’s awesome!” you cheered, momentarily forgetting your awkwardness. “We’re still on the lookout for our red leaf and smooth stone!”

“Don’t worry; we’ll catch up!” Haruko said, playfully nudging Kogure, who was puffing up with pride.

As the scavenger hunt continued, you found the smooth stone and rushed back to join your teammates. The chatter and laughter around you felt comforting, but every now and then, you caught Ryota stealing glances your way. It made you self-conscious and yet inexplicably thrilled.

Finally, when the time was called, everyone regrouped, and your father tallied up the findings. “Looks like Team [Name] is the winner!” he announced with a grin, holding up a small prize bag filled with goodies.

You cheered with your group, feeling a swell of pride. But your thoughts drifted as you looked at Ryota, who was beaming at your success. The moment felt meaningful, and you couldn’t help but wonder what his smile meant.

“Alright, let’s celebrate with some lunch!” your father said, clapping his hands together. “You’ve all earned a good meal!”

With everyone buzzing with excitement, you took a moment to reflect on the scavenger hunt. You felt grateful for the friendships you had nurtured over the years and the memories you were creating, even as the stirring feelings for Ryota lingered in the back of your mind.

-

Lunch felt like the perfect reward after the excitement of the scavenger hunt, and as everyone gathered around, the spread was unmistakably traditional. Haruko and Yohei unpacked a variety of beautifully arranged dishes: onigiri stuffed with different fillings, tamago-yaki (sweet rolled omelet), grilled fish, and fresh vegetables. There were even a few containers of miso soup kept warm in thermos flasks. The familiar aroma of soy sauce, sesame, and seaweed filled the air, blending seamlessly with the natural scent of the forest.

Everyone sat down on picnic mats, chatting about the hunt and comparing the items they'd found. The conversation was light and cheerful, but you couldn’t help but glance over at Ryota every now and then, feeling a new tension you hadn’t noticed before.

After everyone had their fill of food, your father announced, “Alright, who’s ready for some fun by the lake? We’ve got kayaks, and those of you who just want to swim or relax by the water can do that too. It’s a bit of a hike, but nothing too tough after that meal!”

The group’s excitement reignited at the mention of the lake, and you all packed up quickly. The walk to the lake was filled with more laughter and friendly chatter, the path lined with mossy stones and towering trees. Ryota stuck close to you, but this time, you found yourself less anxious about it. His presence had become both familiar and comforting, and the awkwardness from earlier seemed to fade into something more intriguing.

When you arrived at the lake, the sight took your breath away. The water was a calm, deep blue, reflecting the sky and surrounded by thick trees. A few kayaks rested on the shore, while a wooden dock jutted out into the lake, perfect for those who wanted to dive in for a swim. The air here was cooler, the breeze carrying a refreshing hint of water.

Some of your friends immediately headed toward the kayaks. Haruko and Kogure paired up, already debating who would paddle faster, while Yohei stripped off his shirt and dove into the water with a triumphant splash. The scene was peaceful but lively, and you found yourself drawn to the calmness of the lake.

Ryota wandered over to the edge of the dock, motioning for you to join him. "Want to sit for a bit before jumping in?"

You nodded, walking over and sitting beside him, your legs dangling over the edge, just above the water. The two of you watched your friends in comfortable silence for a while—Haruko and Kogure laughing as they struggled to synchronize their paddling, Yohei floating lazily on his back, and your father enjoying the sight of everyone having a good time from the shore.

Eventually, Ryota broke the silence. “So, I’ve been meaning to ask you something,” he said, leaning back on his hands as he glanced your way. “Your dad mentioned your faith a couple of times. You’re a Christian, right?”

His question caught you off guard, but you nodded, curious about where this was going. “Yeah, I am. I’ve been a Christian for as long as I can remember. Why do you ask?”

Ryota hesitated for a moment, seeming to choose his words carefully. “I’ve always been kind of interested in that. It’s different from how I grew up, you know? And I guess… I’m curious about how it works. Especially when it comes to things like relationships.”

You felt a warmth spread through your chest, a mixture of surprise and nervousness. “Relationships?”

He rubbed the back of his neck, clearly unsure of how to phrase his thoughts. “Yeah. I mean, I know in some faiths, there’s a certain way people are supposed to approach relationships, right? Like, with certain values or… expectations? I don’t know, I’m probably not explaining it well.”

You smiled, touched by his interest. “No, you’re making sense. In Christianity, there are definitely values that guide relationships. Things like love, respect, and faithfulness are really important. And, well, being honest about your intentions with someone. I think the idea is that relationships are meant to reflect how God loves us—selflessly and with a purpose.”

Ryota nodded slowly, his gaze drifting out over the water. “That sounds… really different from what I’m used to hearing. My parents never really talked about relationships in that way. They were always more focused on other things, like school or work. But I think there’s something nice about the idea of being with someone for a reason, like it’s not just random.”

Your heartbeat a little faster as you considered his words. Was he just curious, or was there something more behind his questions? You could still hear your father’s teasing voice from earlier in the day, and now, it seemed to echo more loudly in your mind.

“I think it makes relationships deeper,” you said softly. “When you believe there’s a purpose behind them, it changes how you see the person you’re with. It’s not just about how you feel in the moment; it’s about something lasting.”

Ryota glanced at you, and for a moment, you felt as though he was seeing you differently. The look in his eyes was more thoughtful, like he was really taking in what you were saying. He gave you a small, almost shy smile. “That’s… pretty cool. I didn’t know you thought about things like that.”

Your heart fluttered at the sincerity in his voice. “I think about it a lot,” you admitted, trying to keep your voice steady. “Especially when it comes to people who are important to me.”

For a long moment, neither of you spoke, the sound of the water lapping against the dock and the distant laughter of your friends filling the silence. You felt that same charged atmosphere from earlier, but this time, it felt less awkward and more like… potential. Something was shifting between the two of you, and you weren’t sure if you should be excited or scared.

Ryota leaned forward slightly, his voice quieter now. “So, do you think... that’s something you’d want? A relationship like that?”

Your heart skipped a beat. Was he asking about your general beliefs, or was this more personal? You weren’t sure, but as you met his gaze, you realized something had changed. Maybe your father had been right, and maybe, just maybe, Ryota was seeing you in a new light.

“Yeah,” you replied softly, feeling your pulse quicken. “I think I would.”

Just then, Hanamichi called out, breaking the moment. “Hey, you two! Are you coming in, or are you just going to sit there all day?”

Ryota chuckled, shaking his head, and you both stood up. “Let’s join them,” he suggested, his expression brightening. As you walked together to the water, you felt a new sense of connection between you, something that promised to grow deeper with time.

Once you reached the shoreline, you all split into teams for some fun activities in the water. Hanamichi and Mitsui set up a light-hearted relay race involving swimming and kayaking, while the rest of the group gathered in the shallow end to play games. As you teamed up with Ryota, you felt a giddy rush of anticipation and nerves mingling together.

Ryota grinned, and you noticed how he looked at you with a newfound spark. “Ready to get wet?” he challenged playfully, splashing water in your direction.

With laughter spilling out, you splashed him back, the both of you fully immersing yourselves in the cheerful chaos. As the laughter and shouts surrounded you, you felt lighter and freer than ever, and the connection with Ryota grew stronger.

-

As the sun began its slow descent, casting a golden glow over the lake, the group gathered on the shore, preparing for their final activity of the day. Your father had planned a simple, laid-back session—painting on small wooden plaques, each person getting the chance to reflect on the day and create something meaningful to take home. The atmosphere was calm, the earlier excitement of the scavenger hunt and lake fading into a quiet sense of contentment.

The group settled on blankets near the water, the wooden plaques and paintbrushes laid out in front of you. Haruko was already chatting with Kogure about what she wanted to paint, while Yohei, never one to miss a chance to make a joke, was talking about painting a self-portrait “so everyone can remember his greatness.” Laughter rippled through the group, but as you glanced over at Ryota, you noticed he was quieter than usual, focused on something in his hands.

After a while, everyone got lost in their own creations, and the conversations became softer, more reflective. You dipped your brush into the paint, unsure of what to create but enjoying the calmness of the moment. The day had been perfect in its own way, but there was still something lingering in the back of your mind—Ryota’s earlier questions about relationships and Christianity. The memory of his thoughtful expression stayed with you, making your heart race whenever you looked in his direction.

As you worked on your painting, Ryota stood up and wandered over to you. “Hey,” he said quietly, his voice a little nervous but gentle. “Can we talk for a minute?”

Surprised, but curious, you nodded and stood up, leaving your half-finished plaque behind. He led you a little farther down the shore, away from the rest of the group, to a quiet spot near a cluster of trees. The soft breeze from the lake carried the faint sounds of your friends’ chatter, but in this moment, it felt like the world had narrowed down to just the two of you.

Ryota took a deep breath, and you could see the tension in his shoulders as he seemed to gather his thoughts. After a long pause, he pulled something from his pocket—a small cross necklace, simple but beautiful, glinting in the fading sunlight. He held it out to you, his hand steady even though you could tell he was nervous.

“I wanted to give this to you,” he said, his voice soft. “I know how much your faith means to you, and… I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said earlier. About how relationships are supposed to be about love, respect, and purpose. I don’t know if I fully understand everything yet, but I’ve been learning more—about you, your beliefs, and what really matters to you.”

Your breath caught in your throat as he continued, the weight of his words sinking in. He reached into his bag and pulled out a small notebook, its cover worn but neatly kept, and handed it to you. “I’ve been writing in this for a while now, just thoughts and questions about everything—about life, and faith, and you. I want to understand, and I want to do things the right way. So… I guess what I’m trying to say is…”

Ryota paused, his gaze steady but full of emotion. “I like you, [Name]. A lot. And I want to be with you, but I also want to respect what’s important to you—your faith, your values. I don’t want to rush into anything if it’s not the right way to do it. I’d rather get to know you better, in a way that honors what you believe.”

For a moment, you couldn’t find the words. The sincerity in his voice, the way he had thought about this so deeply, touched you more than you could have imagined. Your father’s earlier teasing seemed to have been more than just playful—Ryota had clearly been thinking about you in a different way for some time, and now he was standing here, offering you something real and honest.

Your heart raced, but you felt a deep sense of peace. “Ryota,” you began, your voice soft but steady. “I really appreciate this. It means a lot that you took the time to understand what’s important to me. I like you too, but I think… I’d like to take things slow. To get to know you more, the way my faith teaches me to. It’s not about rushing into a relationship—it’s about building something with intention, with respect.”

Ryota nodded, a warm, relieved smile spreading across his face. “I’m okay with that,” he said, his voice soft but certain. “I want to do this the right way, with you.”

In that moment, everything felt right. You reached out to take the cross necklace from him, your fingers brushing against his hand as you did. The simple gesture felt meaningful, like a quiet promise between the two of you. Ryota gently helped clasp it around your neck, and as his hands lingered near your shoulders, he leaned forward, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.

The gesture was sweet, respectful, and full of unspoken emotion. It wasn’t rushed or filled with the urgency of new relationships—it was thoughtful, careful, the beginning of something deeper.

As you stood there by the lake, the warmth of the necklace resting against your chest, you felt a deep sense of gratitude. Not just for Ryota’s confession, but for his willingness to respect your values, to take the time to do things the right way. And for the first time, you felt that the possibility of something meaningful with him wasn’t just a distant hope—it was something real, something you could both build together.

You glanced up at him, a soft smile playing on your lips. “Thank you,” you whispered, the words carrying more meaning than you could express.

Ryota smiled back, and in the quiet moment that followed, everything felt perfect. The future was uncertain, but for now, you both knew that you were beginning something special—something worth waiting for.

As you shared that look of understanding, the gentle waves lapping at the shore felt like the perfect soundtrack to your budding relationship. Hanamichi and Ayako exchanged glances, clearly thrilled by what they’d witnessed. With soft whispers and playful nudges, they continued to cheer each other on, completely happy for their friends navigating the thrilling waters of newfound affection.

winnie's talk: so if it seems rushed it is bc tumblr did not saved at some point and i got fed up - anyways please reablog, comment & like !

[littlelalu]

FaceTime | Milo Manheim (Slight Smut)

WARNING: Some cussing ... some sexual words....

NOTE: Y/N = Your name

------------------------------------------------------------

FaceTime

The silence in the apartment felt heavier than usual tonight. I am used to hearing Milo’s laughter echo through the place. He has been gone for a little over a month to film season 2 of School Spirits in Vancouver. I couldn’t go with him due to my job and school. This has been the longest time without seeing each other. We do Facetime, call, and text every day but it’s not the same. I want him here, with me. I knew what I was getting myself into when I began dating him, but I didn’t expect to miss him this much. This week was the worst too. I have been wanting “him”. I keep having flashbacks from the last time we had sex. His hands are all over my body, His m, his plus eyes. I have been doing everything to keep my mind off it by watching shows, going on a walk with Louie, and doing homework. NOTHING HELPS.

From the corner of my eye, I saw my phone screen lit up. I grabbed my phone and checked who it was. It was Milo.

“Hey Babe. Just got done filming and I am heading to the hotel now. Are you still up?” he said when I answered.

We have a 2-hour time difference. “Hiii babe! Yeah, it’s only 8 here haha. How was filming?” I texted back. I saw the little text bubble pop up again.

 ‘It was fucking amazing. We filmed a crazy scene that I will tell you more about later, but that shit was scary as hell.”

‘Scaredy cat” I joked.

 “Mean,” he said with a giggle.

“ Anyways do you have plans tonight with the cast again?” I asked curiously. I want to try something new.

“Nope. Why? Want to Facetime?”

“Yes!” I said too quickly, making him laugh.

“Give me like an hour. I am like 25 minutes away from the hotel and I want to shower. “

“Same here. See you soon babe.” I said before we hung up.

I passed some time by going on TikTok and scrolling through videos. After half an hour, I got up from the couch and began getting my things ready so I could shower.

~~~After shower. ~~~

I quickly changed into a crop top and shorts since I took a little longer in the shower than I thought I would. I walked into my room and grabbed my laptop. As my Macbook turned on, I texted Milo.

Hey babe. Are you good to go?

Yes ma’am! Start the call!

I started the Facetime call on my laptop. Milo answered instantly

“Hey, cutie!” He said as he answered. His hair looked messy and slightly wet from his shower. He could see his bare skin. Oh God. He’s shirtless.

“Miloooo!” I said excitedly. “How was your day love?”

“Besides having fun filming, it was pretty chill. We had to reshoot some scenes because we kept getting out of character.”

We talked a bit more about his time on set, telling me that ‘scary’ scene he had to film. I was doing my best to pay attention, but he looked so fine. All I could think about was what I could do to him if he were here.

“You seem a bit off. Everything okay?” Milo said, bringing me back to reality.

“Yeah..” I said shyly, slightly blushing.

“What’s wrong, “Y/N”?” He asked sternly.

“I– I just miss ‘you’” I said.

“I miss you too, babe. No need to be upset right now. We will see each other soon” He said with a reassuring smile.

“No, Milo.” I sighed looking down slightly embarrassed. “I miss “you”’”

Milo looked confused at first. “What? What do you me-” He got quiet and his eyes widened. “Oh…”

“I-i’m sorry. I s-should go. I made this awkward.”

“Babe, no. Just caught me off guard. I never imagined you having these thoughts. You’re so innocent.” He said with a smirk.

“I’m not sure why I need you this way. I just do. This whole week has been crazy.”

“Well… “ He said “If it makes you feel any better… I miss “you” too.” He said using his hands to air a quote on ‘you”

I felt my cheeks get hot. “Really?”

“You have no idea. You left your mark on me before I left. Remember? I couldn’t stop thinking how wild you were” He said.

We did go crazy before he left—the best one for sure. 

I giggled. “Sorry about that. But no regrets” 

“Why don’t you show me how much you missed me?” He asked. 

I looked at him in shock. “H-how?”

“ Rub yourself.” He demanded.

Me being a good girl and started to do so. I took off my shorts and underwear and began to back my laptop. The angle of the camera can see my whole body now. I laid my back against the bedboard and spread my legs open. I grabbed a little bit of lotion and began rubbing myself. 

Slight moans came out of my mouth.

“Fuck babe” Milo groaned. “I want to fuck you so bad right now.”

“Do the same, Milo,” I demanded him.

He set his phone down against something and started pulling down his joggers. He sat up on his bed. His dick is so hard. His tip throbbing. 

“You’re happy to see me,” I said and winked at him.

“I-I always am” as he began to stroke himself. “I want to f-feel you, babe. Me pinning you d-down bed. Pounding you from behind.” 

I rubbed myself a bit faster and started to let out some moans. “M-Milo. I-I need you in me. I want to r-ride you so b-bad.” 

He bit his lip trying not to moan loudly. “Take your shirt off.” He demanded again.

I raised my shirt. I wasn’t wearing my bra, so my breasts were exposed to him. 

“O-oh G-god, Y/N” he moaned. “I remember how much they bounced when I was pounding you.”

“I w-wish y-o-o-u were sucking on them r-right now.”

I saw him roll his head back.“F-fuck, Y/N” He moaned. “Finger yourself and Moan my name for me. Think of me fucking you right now.” He kept stroking himself.

I inserted two fingers like he would and moaned his name louder each time I pumped them in and out. I kept thinking of how he would fuck me so hard right now. He moaned slightly louder this time.

“I-I-I’m close, baby” He whimpered out and picked up his pace. 

“Me too” I groaned. I rubbed myself in the right spot and finished in my hand. I was panting.

I noticed Milo finished and was out of breath too. 

“That was something: he said slightly laughing. I giggled at his comment.

“Yeah. It really was.” 

“Hold on… I … ummm… gotta clean my mess” He said. 

I nodded. “Me too” We left the call open but went to clean ourselves up quickly. Once we were done we returned to our call.

“I miss you even more now…” He said.

“Almost time babe. Just three more weeks.” I said.

“We might have to do that again sometime soon. You look so beautiful moaning my name like that.”

“Milo!” I said, slightly blushing.

“Oh I’m sorry,” He said in a playful voice “Is the girl who mentioned she missed me fucking her acting innocent now?”

I rolled my eyes at him “Haha, very funny”

“Well…. Just know your dreams will become true very soon” He said and winked at the camera.

I have been counting down the days for that anyway. “I hope so. If not, I will just have to do it myself” I smirked at him.

He acted offended.”Don’t you dare.” 

“I’m just saying.” I giggled.

He yawned. “I’m tired now babe. Ima head to bed. I have to wake up early to film some more. I’ll text ya in the morning.”

“That’s fine love. Get some rest.”

“Goodnight babe. I love you so much, beautiful.” He said as he blew a kiss at me and waved at the camera.

I blew a kiss at him “Good night! I love you too, handsome.”

We ended the call.

I went to bed that night feeling relaxed and happy after that exciting call. Now, I have to wait for the real thing soon.

--------------------------------------------------------------

NOTE: I am posting this at midnight. I started working this Friday afternoon but was too busy to finish it. It's not my best as I have not written anything smut. But I'll see how it goes.

Time for bed for me.... Goodnight yall! :)

[mxqdii]

Hi! Can you please write something about Matt Sturniolo having a gf who’s an actress? You can decide if you want it to be a fic or hcs!:)

Have a great day!

headcannons - m.s x actress gf

pairings: matt sturniolo x actress reader

summary: headcannons

warning(s): matt being the best boyfriend

okay matt would be SO supportive like i'll cry, he would be on set with you as much as he could and if you think you did a bad performance job he'll convince you otherwise

if you meet him and you're already an actor, he'd definitely watch some of your stuff secretly

if you meet him and you're trying to be an actor, he'd drive you to every audition, make some calls to see if he can get you a good agent and just do whatever he can to help you.

you talk about him in a bunch of interviews and he always watches them and gets all happy

he would definitely brag about you, like in podcasts he would just start ranting about how amazing you are and how well you did in a specific role, he's your biggest fan 100%

he'd wanna watch your shows with you but you protest against it because of embarrassment

him and his brothers would watch your stuff and if theres a plot twist or something they'd all text you freaking out and just geeking over it 😭

at awards, whenever you get nominated for something he would be SO PROUD. posting on his story and just making it a huge deal to everyone and everything (he's so adorable i can't)

if you come home sad because you didn't get a role, he'd just cuddle you and attack you with kisses until you smile again, making sure to tell you how amazing you are.

he hates seeing you upset when you don't think you deserve an award or just in general you thinking you're not good enough, he'd reassure you 24/7 until you believe him

you'd bring him to every single award show you get invited to (he's your plus 1 to everything)

if you win any awards, he'd kiss you on the cheek and listen to your speech smiling the whole time

him helping you practice lines 24/7

if you have to kiss someone else for a different role he wouldn’t really care considering its just acting, but he wouldn't wanna watch any of the scenes.

you'd spoil stuff for him when he wants

he gets emotional when watching you do sad scenes because he absolutely hates seeing you sad

he probably has atleast a few edits of you saved

you guys reading wattpad of eachother for a video

PEOPLE WOULD TOTALLY WRITE FANFICS OF YOU TWO OMFG 😭

you guys would read them and just be absolutely dying laughing

if people wrote smut about you.. well... lets just say you do NOT let matt read it whatsoever

if you get anxious because of the paparazzi he'd try to cover you as best as he can.

TAGLIST:

@stargirlv0id @strniolo @annaisabookworm

[infinityinakiss]

*agatha all along episode 5 spoilers*

holy shit that was a fucking episode alright

i loved the broom scene so much, whoever thought of that gets a raise.

rio being protective of agatha and her mommy issues I WANNA CRY also even the fact that rio knows any of her trauma implies that they were basically wives, agathario fans keep wining.

rip alice, but also i think she's alive, or at least gonna come back in some way. rio disappeared for some reason y'all and i think it was to deal with alice. with the way that rio was looking at agatha after she drains alice's power, it doesn't make sense that she would just disappear when it was clear that agatha needed her, unless there was something more pressing to deal with. so rio went to talk to alice.

i hope.

oh my god agatha trauma episode. so much to unpack there. the fear she had and the confusion in her eyes. her disbelief towards why her mother would continuously hate her and hurt her, over and over again. she was never able to leave that 18 year old version of herself that her mother tried to execute. then there's nicholas scratch. her son, pleading with her to stop. her mother, and her son, two swords in her heart. one she couldn't get to love her, and one she couldn't stop loving.

did she lie when she said she lost control? i vote no. her power draining thing had always started out as a form of protection, that then evolved in to becoming who her mother always thought she was. in this moment, she's terrified. she saw a rope that was thrown the well and she grabbed it.

now the juicy bit.

"you're so much like your mother" THE WAY I SCREAMED

TEEN YOUR MOM IS SO PROUD RIGHT NOW

IT WAS AMAZING, NO NOTES, BEST WAY TO DO THE WHOLE WICCAN THING IN MY HUMBLE OPINION

i love the lack of lines in the whole scene, and just letting the acting speak for itself. especially because most of the viewers already knew that he was wiccan, i really love that they didn't have agatha completely spell it out for us. i think they're at least a bit aware that this wasn't a twist, just something that was exciting.

the way wanda's magic is just so recognizable. i think joe locke did a pretty good job emulating wanda's fighting style. the fingers were on point.

i was really surprised that agatha wasn't a tiny bit concerned when she found out that teen was the child of the scarlet witch, the very person who decimated her after knowing magic existed for a solid two hours. plus it seems to be implied that she figured out who he was because she recognized his magic. it doesn't make sense that she would taunt a person that she knows has a family history of fucking shit up when they're distressed.

PHENOMENAL SONG CHOICE

i don't think this was an actual trial. i think this the road realizing that this is a coven with too many walls that needed to be broken. and i think it recognized an incredibly powerful witch that needed to figure out who he was. maybe the road thought that a spot for a protection witch needed to open up so that he could fill that space. the way the episode was structured, the way the trial was structured, didn't really line up with the other episodes. so i think agatha's real trial is coming later.

THE HEAD TILT. truly his mother's son.

wanda, come pick up your kid, he's doing something stupid

[thetorturedbuckydepartment]

chapter nine: truth, dare, spin bottles

pairing: Bucky barnes x plus-sized!reader

summary: Six months ago, you were appointed to be Head Nurse to the Avengers by Tony Stark. Every day, you count your lucky stars, knowing the horrible past you quickly ditched back in England. It holds you back, restrains you, from getting close to anyone when on your new job.

That's until you met and fell in love with Bucky Barnes. The supposed assassin with a heart of gold, who seems to be eager to get to know you. To peel back your layers piece by piece, but could you trust him once you're laid before him raw and vulnerable?

masterlist

PREVIOUS PART -- CHAPTER EIGHT: TWENTY STITCHES IN A HOSPITAL ROOM

warnings: language, self-deprecation, negative thought and talk, fatshaming (past experience, not Bucky), alcohol consumption, mentions of injuries inflicted in ch8

word count: 3.9k

Taglist: @scott-loki-barnes @cjand10 @blackwidownat2814 @blackbirdwitch22 @laughterafter  @blackhawkfanatic @mcira @bxckybxrnes24 @rachellovesloki @toffeacademia @bean-bean2000 @lana525 @selella

A/N: YAY this was an amazing chapter to write -- the last scene in this chapter was what I had in mind when I named this series! I love every single one of u who have reblogged, liked, commented. it means so much to me. also, the instance of fatshaming mentioned in this chapter is almost verbatim a very real experience that happened to me, so pls don't be horrible about it, its literal trauma I carry with me. anyways--enjoy! next chapter is the fluff filled, sexual tension at its peak, chapter that'll be the most coveted and awaited!

“Bucky!” You exclaim as quietly as you can, trying to not disturb Nat who’s just gotten some well earned sleep. The rest of the infirmary is empty, and you’re glad that means nobody is around to witness your incoming breakdown. The waterworks start again, flowing down your face in relief. He’s not dead, he’s not in a coma. He’s your Bucky and he’s safe and alive. 

“Hey doll, come on now. No need to cry, is there?” It kills him to watch you sob, and he raises a hand to brush those tears away, but winces. Something is restricting him, and then he looks down and remembers. The blood, the bullets, the metallic taste still coating his mouth.

“Yes there is! You almost died on me.” 

“How could I die when I have such a sweet woman trying her best to give me a praise kink?” He smiles then, and even though he looks tired as shit, you can tell he’s on the mend. The poison was potent but its effects were definitely reversible. 

You laugh at that, taking his vibranium hand that’s closest to you and pressing a kiss to it. “Well I had to stop you dying somehow. If I can turn you on, maybe you could focus on your raging boner instead of wanting to sleep, right?” You laugh again, wiping your tears as his hand cups your face, stroking your cheek in pure adoration.

“Did—Did I really have a boner, doll?”

“I’m not sure, love. I was a bit more focused on the gallons of blood you were losing.” His gaze travels down your form, and you know he’s checking for any injuries as you stroke the inside of his wrist in reassurance.

“I’m alright Buck.” Then he sees your hand, and the taste in his mouth sours as he remembers it’s origins.

“Your hand…I did that. I did that to you.” He retracts his hand, pulling himself away from you and into his most familiar mindset, where he’s convinced he’s a monster and a murderer. You have to pull him out again, you need him next to you.

“Bucky.” You keep your voice firm. “Bucky, no. You didn’t do this to me. It was necessary, the situation called for it. And I’m completely okay. I got it looked at, and it’s not that bad.”

“How many stitches?”

“Buck—.”

“How many stitches?” You can see him shake, horrified at what he’s done. But he hasn’t done anything wrong.

“Six.” His eyes water, and you try to wipe them away.

“No, don’t touch me. Doll, I hurt you, I’m a monster, please don’t touch me.” You know he’s not, you want to bring him back. Back to the Bucky you know, and love. Your heart aches at his words, knowing he’s depriving the both of you some much needed comfort.

“No, you’re not. Bucky, look at me. I love you. You’re my best friend. You were in pain, you needed to be stitched up, and based on the level of poisons in your system, you couldn’t have dealt with that level of pain, especially because of the antidote already kicking your ass. We didn’t have any towels or clean cloth for you, which is my fault, I should’ve checked it before we left. You’re not a monster, Buck. You never have been. You never will be, not to me. You’re not a monster.” His eyes soften and when you reach to dry his tears, he doesn’t stop you. All he needed was reassurance from you, and his resolve quickly crumbles.

You’re gentle, well aware of his vulnerability. You decide to change the topic, speaking in a much more hopeful voice.

“Once you’re better, me and Nat made plans for all of us to go out for drinks and celebrate, because we got what we needed. You did good, love. You just saved the entire nation from God knows what H— that organisation had up their sleeve. You’re a hero. Well, you always have been. But you’re a damn hero, Bucky, and I’m so damn proud of you.” He begins to sob and shake, and you hold his hand. “Would you like to go out with us?” He nods, and you smile.

“Come here, doll. You need to get some rest, you’ve been so busy tending to me, and crying.” He shuffles over with a smile, making room for you in his cot. And you can’t deny it, can’t deny the heavy exhaustion taking over your body at even the mention of sleep past his lips. “You’re my safe place, you know that? I couldn’t sleep a wink without knowing you were okay. I think this is why they don’t let us treat our loved ones back where I’m from. Because the sight of you broke me so bad I almost couldn’t do anything.” You curl into his side, eyes closing as one hand rests on his chest, the other tucked around your own middle. You head rests comfortably against where metal meets flesh, and you absentmindedly press a kiss to one of his scars there. His hand brushes across the bandages, and it feels like if you were to unwrap them, your hand would be good as new. This is what his golden touch does to you, and you’re sick of denying it. Maybe when you go out for drinks in a couple of days, you’ll make your move. Or at least, express your interest.

“You’re my safe place too. I hope you know that. And that there’s nobody else I would’ve let touch me anyway, especially if you weren’t there to oversee it.” His scent grounds you, and you missed being able to feel the vibrations of his chest when he speaks. You miss him like you’ve not seen him in years. 

You let out a breath, and let yourself fall into sleep, murmuring “I do.”

He holds you tighter, and follows suit.

                                            ————————

You wonder if this is a bad idea. When Nat was dismissed and Wanda had come back from a weekend trip with Vision, you had organised to go out for drinks. 

And you’ve decided that you’re going to try flirting tonight. With Bucky, and hope he’ll pick up what you’re putting down and either politely turn you away (likely) or finally make the move. And not a quick peck on the lips before he almost dies, a proper, sweeping off of your feet, romcom worthy kiss.

When you’d first arrived in New York, you’d decided to put your beaten, broken heart in a cage, and throw the key into the closest filthy river. And yet, Bucky has bended the metal bars with impressive strength and reached for it. He’s patched it up piece by painstaking piece, and made it good as new. You were content in your self-made captivity, the cage was once just fine, until it wasn’t. Until the winter sprung forth with freedom hues, and your heart was just out of one jail into another. 

But at least the warden is a sweetheart, keeping your heart healthy and well-kept. Your bars are his ribs, and at least you can see the daylight from in here. 

You’ve decided to up your going-out outfit to the next level. A black dress covered in deep red roses, just the shade Bucky likes, that shows off a good amount of your cleavage and emphasises the curves of your body in a way you don’t mind. You pair it with a leather jacket, and heavy, dark makeup. It’s a little experimental, but not out of your comfort zone. You used to wear eyeliner and dark lipstick all the time, on almost-dates and never-fun nights out. 

You’d stopped going all together, preferring to stay indoors, in your house, where no man can passively show you just how much prettier he finds your friends, or how much they’d prefer if you just lost a little weight. 

Safe to say, you haven’t experienced nights out in New York. And you can’t even get drunk at the moment, seeing as your hand is yet to heal. You’re just lucky it’s your non-dominant hand, so you were able to do this makeup look to yourself with a few tips and tricks from Nat. You smooth down the dress while adjusting the bangles on your wrist and the wolf emblem glinting against the very top of your breasts. You smile, dark red lips stretching back at you in the mirror.

You know once you step out of the house, and see almost any other woman who’s put a lot less effort into her appearance and somehow looks ten times better than you, you won’t feel pretty. Not even one bit. You’ll know, that even the way you look with the most effort is a million times uglier than anyone else at their worst.

But right now, you feel good. Pretty, even. You turn, watching Nat and Wanda watch you as they’ve already gotten ready and are waiting for you. Everyone in this room is aware of what your plans are.

“Alright, girls. Do I look good—I mean, do I look okay?” For a minute your past traumas flash before your eyes. 

Adjusting a necklace, turning to someone you love and trust, asking if you look good. They reply with “It’s okay, but it would be better if you reduced your volume.” Cruelly mentioning your weight, and then the whole night spent with tears streaming down your face and having to blame it on allergies. You swallow, even the mere thought of that experience almost making a large lump appear in your throat. Why are you thinking of that? It must be the nerves.

“Okay? Girl, you look drop-dead gorgeous. Hell, if you weren’t so down bad for Bucky, I would’ve asked you out in a heartbeat. Absolute heart-stealer.” Nat grins, eyeing you up and down. You know she’s just being nice, but it makes your heart swell all the same.

“Yeah, and if me and Vision weren’t so madly in love I would ask you to run away with me. Fuck, what are you doing later?” All the three of you laugh.

You have a history with having things like this said to you as a joke, but it’s never been so well-intended. While your self-esteem is mildly intact, you thank the both of them.

“Alright, I’ll see you guys there. Bucky’s taking me on his motorcycle.” You grab your maroon purse and head out to the front. Bucky’s dressed in all black, leaning against his motorcycle. Dear God, he looks so sexy. He’s typing something on his phone looking all angry, eyebrows furrowed. The moonlight paints him in the most glorious shades, of black and brown and glimmering gold. Home. That’s what he looks like, to you. Home. No longer a place thats an ocean and half a country away. This man, this super soldier, in whose presence you’ve felt like you belonged more in these past few months, than a lifetime over there.

Your chest fills with pride, and you can’t stop yourself.

“You showing off that metal arm tonight?” You skip the last few steps, stopping in front of him. You’re lucky you didn’t trip, it’s the first time you’ve worn heels in ages. Another memento of a time, of a version of you long gone.

He looks up from his phone, and his jaw goes slack. His eyes follow your figure up and down, mouth still hanging open.

“Doll—I, um, you—.” You put you hand on his shoulder, drawing his cerulean eyes up and straight on your lips. He licks his own, and everything flies out the window. A hot pressure ties itself to your lower belly, and you feel your face flush. 

You do have his attention after all.

You smile, looking up at him and grinning like a devil. He’s still at a loss for words, even as you squeeze his bicep. 

“Bucky…Should we get going or are you planning to stare at my mouth all night?” Your head tilts to the side, and it seems to snap him out of whatever daydreams he’s been conducting in his mind, so vivid they bring a pink glow to his cheeks.

“I—Yeah. Yes, let’s…let’s go. Where are we going?” You laugh at his stupor, walking over to his motorcycle and running your hands along the worn leather seat. For a moment, you think about all of the other girls that must have sat behind him, gripping onto him and pretending to be scares, when in reality they just want to cop a feel.

You wonder if you’re half as pretty as any of them, to him, at least. “This is an amazing bike, Buck. Incredibly sexy.” When you look up, you notice him watching you. You flash him your signature sweet smile, and he finally approaches the bike, putting his hands dangerously close to yours.

“Not nearly half as sexy as you. You look—Well, you can probably guess by my lack of words, but—You look gorgeous, doll. Truly. I—.”

“Thank you.” His demeanour finally cracks, a small smile appearing on his face when he realises you’re not fighting him. He wordlessly hands you a helmet, and clips it on for you, warm hands lingering under your chin. 

“Hold on tight, doll.” And then he zooms as fast as he can, with the wind blowing in your hair feeling incredible, even though you clutch onto his middle for dear life.

Your favourite part is when he stops at traffic lights to reach behind him and cheekily run his fingers along your knees and the very lower parts of your thighs, and somehow, you’ve never felt more wanted in your entire life.

Always a compliment or a cheeky joke on his tongue the entire way there— it makes your insides swirl, wondering if it truly can be that your feeling are the 10 to his 0.1.

God, you hope so. 

“Hey, Buck, can we talk tonight? After we come back?” You say to him, just as he’s unfastening your helmet and storing it back in his bike, not without admiring you shaking out your hair, running your fingers through it to tame the horrible case of helmet hair you’re sure you’re having.

“Yeah, sure doll. You don’t need to ask.” His voice is so soft, and you almost melt into a fucking puddle at his feet.

Great. That’s when you’ll make your move. You two are the last to arrive, as usual, and you casually slip your arms around one of Bucky’s, gripping him tightly to you like he’s your man, fingers intertwining undeniably. For the purpose of the illusion, your poor heart goes along with it. 

He visibly stiffens and so just before you walk into the dive bar, you stop him and lean in to whisper into his ear. You don’t mean for your voice to drop an octave with your volume, but it so happens. “Buck, darling. I can stop, if you want. All you have to do is say so, you know that, right?” You don’t miss the catch in his breath, the way his eyes flutter closed as he tries his best to retain his composure. 

“Please.” He turns his face toward you, and you don’t anticipate having your faces so close. You can see the golden flecks in his eyes, as pure as his soul and heart. You wonder where it is, knowing yours fully resides behind the bars of his ribcage. 

“Don’t stop,” he all but whispers and it takes a mountain’s worth of effort to conceal the moan slipping past your lips at his words. He’s done it on purpose, you’re sure.

The kiss has changed the fate of you and him, whether that be for worse or for better. You want him either way. 

You glance at his lips, and you notice how some of your lipstick has ended up just to the side of his ear from your sexual whispers. 

“Oh, sorry. My lipstick’s all—“

“Leave it. I want everyone in this bar to know who I’m with tonight.” His eyes find your lips again, no longer perfect from the smear decorating his face.

“You’re with me?”

“Always.” You want him. Desperately. To push him against the brick and mortar and kiss him like the world is ending tomorrow, and it makes your heart pick up. He notices, and you can feel the desire simmering in the air between the both of you. 

“Dear God guys, you can eyefuck each other later, now get in here.” Natasha’s voice distracts the both of you, heads whipping in comical synchronisation to stare at her bug-eyed, feeling caught by her crudeness. 

“We—I— We’re on our way.” You try and cover for the both of you, secretly dismayed by his dismissal of the notion. You try to not let your fears haunt the wonderful moment, even though they stand not too far off on the sidelines, waiting for the change of score so they can step into the limelight.

He didn’t let go of you the whole night. When everyone was a few drinks deep, he let his hand shift onto your thigh, staring at you like you might hate it. You’d grabbed his wrist and stroked the inside of it, knowing it’s his favourite way to be touched by you. 

And then the gang uses an empty beer bottle, spinning it on the tables in a juvenile game of truth or dare. You laugh at it, secretly holding Bucky’s hand under the table. You never got to play this game in school, too busy with work or studying and then getting to that sore age where it just feels So High School(derogatory).

But tonight, you are happy, free. Trying to access a version of you you’ve long discarded.

“Nurse!” Tony calls out, surprisingly sober despite being on his seventh bottle, whose neck is currently facing towards you. 

“Truth or Dare?” 

“Truth.”

“You like someone in this group, in this booth, don’t you?” You freeze. You can’t admit that, definitely not while holding that certain someone’s hand. “Well, it’s definitely not Steve.” Tony laughs, and you feel horrible for the poor blonde, now trying to hide his face in embarrassment. It seems alcohol opens old wounds when in Tony Stark’s system.

“Mr Stark.” Somehow, even fully sober you seem to have an air of confidence about you, mixing with your perfume. “That’s not very nice. How would you like it if someone made fun of when you used to hit on Ms Pepper and she rejected you? You know we’re all good friends here, there’s no need to be horrible to poor Steve, especially not just because he liked someone who doesn’t have the same feelings for him, but still cares deeply as a friend. It’s just not done, Mr Stark.”

You turn to Steve then, apology on the tip of your tongue. “Don’t worry about it, dear. Thank you for standing up for me.” He quickly touches your knee, careful to not let it linger seeing as he’s caught sight of your and Bucky’s intimate contact the second it began happening. “God, how’s she so respectful when telling me off?” Tony grumbles. Everyone’s eyes are on you, and you change the topic.

“I don’t want to complicate things right now, in front of anyone, so I won’t be answering. Dare.”

“Take three shots. I’ve heard you’re a drinker, and you haven’t touched a drop all night. Not fair, is it?” He leans back in his part of the booth, while you try your hardest to seem smaller, squashed between Steve and Bucky. 

You wonder how to answer without trying to seem like you’re chiding Bucky, because you truly do not blame him for your state. Thor replies for you, his voice booming.

“Can’t you see, the fair maiden has an injured hand, Stark. She should not be consuming any alcohol. Not a single drop.” You flash him a smile, even as you feel Bucky pulling away, and you just know the guilt is pulling him away. 

You quickly grab his hand tighter, keeping it on your thigh and making him meet your eye. 

Don’t blame yourself. You silently signal. 

I’ll try. He blinks back and you sigh, resting your chin on his shoulder for a split second in casual intimacy, and it makes him smile.

“Well yes. But also, Bucky’s not allowed to drink tonight either, so I thought I’d join him in solidarity.” It’s not a lie. One of the reasons you’ve been clinging to Bucky all night is to make sure he doesn’t drink alcohol. You know he’s a super soldier, you know you’d gotten him the antidote on time, and you’ve double checked his wounds at least twice in the past 24 hours just to know they’re nothing more than pink marks that’ll be gone by the time the sun rises tomorrow.

But you still worry. You still want to be safe, not wanting to take any risks. Nobody knows what level of poison will always remain in his bloodstream, what the knock on effects of machine produced antidotes are. 

You can’t take the chance. You just can’t. 

“That’s right. Me and my girl are going sober tonight. No shots for either of us.” 

He’s spoken several sentences, but you fixate on four words. Me and my girl. Is it correct grammar? No. But does it absolutely send your mind into a fritz? Absolutely.

“Ugh, all these rules and regulations. Fine then, I dare you to go up there and do some karaoke.” Your eyes widen. How the fuck do you get yourself out of this. “Look, sweetheart. It’s either that or you flirt with the bartender who’s been eyeing you all night.” He tilts his head behind you, and sure enough you’re being watched.

The bartender is not ugly, by any means— tall, brown hair and light eyes. But he’s not Bucky. So what’s the point? That man can stare all he wants, but he’ll never be the one to have you. Not as long as Bucky is next to you, in sickness or in health. 

“Go on, doll. You have an amazing singing voice.” 

“How do you—?”

He leans in to whisper in your ear, sending chills down your spine. “I hear everything you do in your room. When you think nobody’s awake to hear you, or nobody’s listening. I hear everything.” 

And all of a sudden, you’re out of your seat and being pushed to the small karaoke corner and all of the people at your booth get up to stand and hear you.

You know what song you’re going to sing. This isn’t how you planned it, but you suppose you’ll make the most of the situation.

You stand behind the mic stand, and your eyes find Bucky. 

They stay glued on him as you sing Guilty As Sin? By Taylor Swift, imagining all things you’ve never done with him. The way he touches you in your deepest desires, the way he kisses in your daily daydreams. It’s almost too much.

And then you see his face.

Lovestruck, lovelorn, lovesick.

All for you.

NEXT PART

[royal-chandler]

@caressthosecheekbones is made of magic ✨

she and i spent a little time imagining a missing scene after the boys get caught by zahra and thus a little ficlet was born.

thanks for always being willing to toss prompts at me, brainstorm and gleefully coo over firstprince with me, caress! 🥰

—

“So, I did not have that on my bingo card for this morning,” Alex comments awkwardly, seconds into the stunned silence that Zahra’s left behind. “Shit, Henry, that’s on me. I completely forgot to set my alarm last night.”

“I’d say we’re both to blame for that,” Henry replies. Low and bluntly, he adds, “You and I did a remarkable job of distracting one another.”

Alex shakes his head, increasingly fond of the man beside him. “Happy to hear that Zahra didn’t scare the humor out of you.”

“Not so much, no,” Henry says. His somewhat self-deprecating smile fades and concern moves into its place, his gaze scanning and surveying. “I’m more concerned with you. Are you alright?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Alex says, scratching his stubble as he heads back into the bedroom. Picking through the wardrobe, he chooses a crisp white shirt, finds a fresh pair of slate-blue slacks hung with its matching jacket. He flings it all on the bed and lies, his hands flexing over and over, “Yeah, I’m good. Good as gravy.”

Henry has followed him and, of course, he’s got a look like he sees right through Alex—all the way to the anxiety that slides through Alex’s guts and rabbits under his skin. Henry’s concern has now manifested into a frown, an all-too-cute and familiar dip between his brows. He says, “No, you’re not. I—maybe my coming here wasn’t the smartest decision. It was irresponsible and careless and I shouldn’t have—”

“What? Oh my God. Can it,” Alex interrupts hurriedly, skidding Henry’s words to a stop. He closes the distance between them and his hands appreciatively slide along the length of Henry’s arms before drawing him in so their fronts fit together. He doesn’t know exactly where the next thing out of his mouth was previously lodged but Henry’s self-criticism wrenches it free. The taste and shape of the endearment feel absolutely right as it leaves him. “Baby, you walking into the bar last night was a sight for sore eyes. Seeing you isn’t ever a mistake in my book. Texas was amazing and I always love being there and I’m proud of the hard work but I really fucking missed this. I missed you.”

Henry visibly softens and soon he’s kissing Alex’s nose with his own, nuzzling near the side of it before his lush mouth touches to Alex’s briefly, a warm and sleep-sweet curl. His hazel eyes gleam with tenderness and Alex melts, dissolved into a loose-limbed form and his worries eclipsed by the closeness of Henry.

“I missed you, too. I only wish that you weren’t in this position. You should be free to come out to your mother on your own timeline—if you ever even chose to.” Henry continues, “I’m sorry.”

“I don’t want you to be,” Alex says. His hand climbs to the column of Henry’s throat en route to Henry’s jaw and there he holds Henry in place, meets his doubt with unflinching conviction. “Don’t take that on okay? I told Zahra I don’t want to drop this, that I won’t drop this. I meant that. So, yeah, I’ll take everything that comes with it.”

“It seems a steep and disproportionate price, Alex.”

“You’re not often wrong, Henry, but when you are, it’s all the way left, I gotta say.”

“Are you—?”

“Sure? Yes, a hundred percent. I’m nervous as fuck but I know what I’m doing. Plus, Zahra’s right. It’s political malpractice to keep this from my mom. She can’t afford getting caught flat-footed during this campaign.”

“Right. Speaking of which,” Henry starts after a parting kiss that Alex unabashedly chases after, “You have two minutes at most to finish putting yourself together. The Brexit threat was aimed toward me but I have a vested interest in you staying in one piece.”

“You’re the stud standing in my shirt,” Alex says, reveling in Henry, from his mussed hair that hangs over his forehead and down to the peek of his tiny striped shorts, his thick thighs and miles of leg. He catches Henry’s blush on the way back up. “And the nerve of you to look that fine in it.”

“You have one strewn across the bed,” Henry reminds him. “Unless you want this specific one back?”

“Keep it. We’ll get you fashion-forward, yet.” Alex smirks and laughs with startled delight when Henry pushes him away. “Do you know how much I love it when you do that? Like that’s not gonna get me out of here any faster.”

In a rewind of the previous night, they dress with immediacy. Henry unbuttons Alex’s shirt and stows it in his suitcase while Alex shimmies out of one pair of pants and hops into another. Alex takes up seconds to gawk and joke that outfit is eleven steps back when Henry pulls on an oatmeal colored crew neck after earthy brown bottoms, has to duck a rolled up ball of used socks that Henry pitches at his head. A ball that Henry ends up having to retrieve from the sheets they land in in order to complete his packing.

Suddenly mack-trucked by affection and crushed doubly with need, Alex takes advantage as Henry leans over the bed, molding himself to Henry’s back and wrapping him up. To Henry’s noise of question and surprise, Alex answers quietly at the nape of his neck and short, soft hairs there, “Ten seconds. Ten more seconds.”

“Zahra—”

“—is fucking brilliant at what she does and has bailed me out so many times that I’m hundreds of gift baskets in debt. She’ll come up with something. I’m on an urgent phone call, I’m finishing up a breakfast meeting with a news correspondent for a quote. I’m tied up in business that’s incredibly important.”

“That’s me then?” Henry jokes.

“Yeah, baby,” Alex admits, the truth punching out of him and his voice terrible. His heart shivers at the soon to be loss of the man in his arms, his insides re-tangling into a knot of misery. There never seems to be enough time.

After an inaudible beat, Henry asks, “Alex, darling, can I look at you?”

“I’ll allow it,” Alex replies, a stutter in his breath. He places a series of kisses to the back of Henry’s neck and down to his spine. Then, Alex lets him go.

Henry turns around and with wonder written in face, the first thing he does is catch his finger around Alex’s silk tie, tugging it lightly. He informs Alex, “This is crooked.”

“You can straighten the tie but you can’t straighten the man, Fox,” Alex says, a little clumsily, his bravado unsteady.

“Fucking menace,” Henry murmurs, sounding endeared. He unfastens the tie and then proceeds to slip and fold the ends into a Windsor knot. When he’s done, he flattens his palm to the center of Alex’s chest. Henry looks up and it may be precarious, Alex’s thought that those bright hazel eyes are romance-rimmed, colored with an emotion deeper than casual. “We’ll meet again soon, yeah? This is simply a bookmark, Alex. That’s all.”

Alex enjoys the imagery of it, a temporary marker in their pages with more chapters to pen. That there will be more of last night—scattering laughter into and against the edges of each other’s mouths, tucked safely away from the world as they share stories and become well-versed in one another.

For now, Alex scripts in another kiss. He captures the give of Henry’s lips with deliberate care and reverence, plying them open with his tongue and swallowing Henry’s little exhales. Thumbs pressed against the hinges of jaws, the gentle coaxing seamlessly sinks into insistence, the two of them greedy to make it count—like they can leave behind and take away traces of each other. Time slurs immeasurably before he and Henry are content, their foreheads meeting softly over a tide of quick, breathy sighs.

“You’d better get going,” Henry says in a hush. “Before they put out a search party or unleash a battalion. Whatever it is you Americans do.”

“Yeah,” Alex agrees, roughly. He walks away with the awful, lead-heavy knowledge that he’ll come back and Henry won’t be there. At the open door, he says, “Have a safe flight and let me know when you land.”

“I’ll be sure to. And you’ll tell me how things go, after you’ve done it?” Henry asks. He’s heartbreakingly beautiful and kind, a vanishing dream. “I want to be there for you, no matter what the outcome is.”

“I’ll be all up in your inbox,” Alex promises, throwing up a peace sign and then slipping out, the door clicking shut behind him.

[bookwormwithadhd]

so my nlmg review / meta / rant / idk what this is im just gonna put my jumbled thoughts in here

i started never let me go because... pondphuwin, plus the plot seemed interesting, and let's say they both didn't let me down, the first more than the latter. but i do have a bunch of criticism for it and things i wish they had done differently.

I'll start from my favourite things about Never Let Me Go:

First of all, the freaking OST. so far NLMG has the best OST in any thai bl I've watched. It was so contextual, beautiful, weaving in and out of focus when it needed to, had a big role in setting the mood of so many scenes, in creating tension and resolving it. The songs chosen in many of the romantic scenes were super fitting and all had a similar vibe somehow. The OST helped hold this entire show together so well. I really need to save a bunch of the songs from the OST to my playlists.

Second thing, the cinimatography of the show. From start to finish, NLMG consisted of so many aesthetically pleasing shots. All the visuals were amazing, and served the plot and themes of the show so much. The colour grading of the show gave it a very nostalgic feel. The scenes that showed confidence were so powerful, the scenes with the sweet moments were so soft, the scenes that showed desire were so strong and heartfelt. Honestly the director of the show did such a good job. Also thematically a lot of shots showed the class difference and social hierarchy, as pointed put by @biochemjess in this post, by using levels and the characters positions in the scenes. Or the lighting discussed by @respectthepetty in this post. There are a lot more thematic things that were shown through the cinimatography but im too lazy to analyze them all. All in all, I loved how each and every scene was so put together from visuals to music to acting. Good job jojo.

Third, PondPhuwin's INSANE chemistry, and their amazing acting in general.

I'll start with Phuwin. He did so well portraying Nuengdiao's character. It was so satisfying and awesome to see it from the subtle body language to the big emotions. Phuwin is so good with big emotional scene's ™ it literally gives me goosebumps. He was able to show the softness yet the rage in Nuengdiao, all the pain but all the happiness, all the immaturity and maturity displayed by him throughout the series. The freaking confidence after coming back from the island, and the uncle kit confrontation scene were so powerful, so well acted and vital to Nueng's character arc, and Phuwin did them flawlessly. Some of my favourite scenes that showcase Phuwin's brilliant acting are the rooftop fight/breakdown scene (it was actuallyone of the first scenes i saw a clip of before i watched nlmg and i was like nah i gotta watch it), the fight/break up on the beach scene, the putting-palm-to-sleep-and-running-away scene (might be my favourite scene ever even though it's so sad), the comeback feom the island and taking his rightful place as a heir sequence, the palm getting shot sequence. Like, oh my god, again, goosebumps. Have I mentioned how good Phuwin is in big emotional scenes???

And Pond... that guy, he's probably one of my favourite thai actors ever. Pond has a certain feel, a certain texture and genuineness in his acting that I can't put my hands on, but oh god, do i feel with every role he plays. His acting has a flavour that I really love. He does geniune, sincere, devoted, softly strong like no other. I saw his acting in We Are first, and honestly it was so surprising to me at the beginning how different Palm's personality is from Phum's (they do have their similarities, but in the beginning of nlmg, Palm was so diff). This showed me how much range Pond has. The hesitance, the politeness, the strength yet softness, the sweet confidence, the micro expressions and the not so micro expressions, they were able to paint Palm's personality so well from ep1 directly. His devotion to his work and to Nuengdiao were so prevalent in every look on his face. His conflict of wanting becoming closer to Nueng but also wanting to (more like having to) do what his father wants him to do, was so well acted. And all the confidence Palm gained at the island arc, when they were in the safety of the island, free like the sea, away from expectation, it was so beautiful to watch Pond act that. Some scenes that highlight what im talking about are the scene in the hospital when Palm confronts his dad about not caring about him (then we see Tanya hugging Nueng just after Palm got slapped by his dad and like kahskajmaj), the scene were he sees Nueng kiss Ben, the shooting class scene ("love is much more powerful than hatred" YEAH TAKE IT FROM THE GUY WHO IS FULL OF DEVOTION AND DESIRE), the scene when Nueng humiliated him at the party (i hate the scene but Palm's face, Palm's reaction, Palm's heart breaking... its powerful), Palm coming back to confront Nueng after the first breakup. The list goes on.

Now PondPhuwin together? it's fucking ART okay? it's so beautiful in all its shapes and forms. All the longing looks, every stare, every piece of dialogue shared, every touch, the tension was there, very strongly. It was so there you could feel it through the screen. Then all the romantic scenes, all the sweet ones, they served. The fight scenes were so good. The soft scenes were so good. The angsty scenes were spot on. The comforting scenes, the hugs, the pain, the tattoo kiss (i will never be over that), the way their relationship goes through so many different stages and so many different dynamics and they did each one of them so fucking well. I honestly will stop talking about this because i could write a 100k essay just about how much i love to see them together on the screen. You guys get me, right????

Anyway, another thing this show did right was FEMALE CHARACTERS. I can't stress this enough, but I'm so tired of shows that give the most 2D, weakly written, unlovable female characters only. And here we got three well flesh out, well written important female characters. Starting with Mrs Tanya, Nueng's mother.

If you saw my post after watching ep 1, you saw how much Tanya caught my eye and attention. And that didn't stop as the show went on. She is strong, loving, caring, but flawed, and oh do i love that. I live that she isnt perfect. I love that we see how much she tries to do her best after her husband's death, how confident she is managing the business and stating her terms and boundaries, and how much she tries to protect and care for Nueng. Was her way of doing that right all the time? not really. but that makes her realistic and makes sense for her character. She unconsciously puts pressure on Nueng for being the only hope for the Kiattrakulmethee family, just like his dad did, and unknowns makes Nueng's relationship with Palm more strained with the promise she made Palm make. But over all, we see a genuine caring mother, that fixed her mistakes by the end and tried her hardest to be successful. (Also she is gorgeous??? i can't not mention that. plus her stylist slayed)

Up next is Maggie!! she was such a pleasant and very very needed character. She helped in Palm's development by being a very good friend. Im so grateful they didn't make her flirty with him all the time and the usual not being able to read the room and trying to get in between the mcs. Nope, we got a genuine friend, who had an initial crush on Palm (i mean look at him, who wouldn't??) but then realised the story, recognised so many of Palm's internal problems and gave him much needed advice and support. They were so cute to see together, and i loved the scenes were she was talking to Palm about what she wants to do with her life, and asking him about what he wants to do with his. I think there was something beautiful there because we saw so much of Palm interacting with people from higher class, poeple who dont understand an integral part of his character, and then we see him talking to maggie, who is also working class, who is also trying to navigate her life and live it to it's fullest job after job. Idk why i liked that this much. I love Maggie, she deserves the best.

And finally, the character i thought i was gonna hate but i loved immensely, Palm's mom, mama Mam. We meet her, as a mother who doesn't know her son, a selfish mother that left and loves her family on her own terms. But them once her son comes back to her life, she steps up to take her role as a mother, and boy does she do good. What we saw of her in the few episodes she was in, was so important. She embraced her son's presence fully and read him so well, gave him advice and supoort he very much needed, gave him a safe place and so much love (for him and his boyfriend), and then as a final tribute, sacrificed her life for theirs.

Her character portrayed the complexity of motherhood, of love, of life. The thing she told palm about life not being all about love explained a lot about her character, and is kinda true. So yeah i love how well written she was.

Now, for side character appreciation we get CHOPPER! You dont get how much love I have for him. He is a green flag, no, a green forest and literally such an perfect character. Perth's acting>>>>>>>>>>> The fact that Chopper faced all that conflict alone, had to choose between jailing his own father and becoming complicit in his crimes, it's heartbreaking. Even Ben wasn't by his side at that point. He was so alone, yet he did the right thing. Love a character with strong values. I love that he didn't have any negative feeling towards Nueng, despite all their parents' conflicts. And him confornging his father? badass, even if he faiked to stop him. Him shooting his father? BADASS.

[nishitanis-left-nut]

kiryus apartment in yakuza 5 is more depressing than the one he had in 0 and that makes me so sad. like whoever was in charge of working for the lighting and mood of the room did an amazing job of it.

objectively, its actually a really good place but it feels sterile, cold, the only personal items around the room being an ash tray and a pair of toothbrushes and slippers (plus the godforsaken picture frame but if anything that just adds to the melancholic feel of the place i swear to got if its that picture of him with nishiki and kazama im gonna lose my shit, but realistically its probably haruka or him with everyone at morning glory, not that thats any less depressing honestly). before the woman (im sorry i haven't played long enough to learn her name yet) comes in and turns the lights on that scene of Kiryu smoking on the floor genuinely almost made me cry. my boy. also his boss insinuating everyone at the office thinks he's gay killed me

[pinazee]

And down the stretch comes murder

I wanted to take this moment to highlight the adorable child actors they got- Liam James and Carlos McCullers II. They are so perfectly cast as Shawn and Gus and they do such an amazing job! Im so impressed by them 👏👏

The whole spitball incident really highlights the differences between Shawn and Gus’ ethics. Shawn feels guilty for thinking he got the wrong spitter and ruined Jimmys life while Gus actually did it and feels no remorse at all. Perhaps it’s because Jimmy tortured Gus more, but it’s also come up a few other times i believe, that Gus is not above revenge nor is always willing to do the right thing if it interferes with his safety or his own code of justice, whereas with Shawn it’s like he can’t rest until he’s made things right. This, in addition to the ways he looks out for people (helping Lassie solve a case without him knowing, helping juliet find some kids without getting paid, standing between Gus and a gun), I think is why i tend to be more drawn to Shawn. I love tender-hearted morally just characters. Im not saying he’s always riding the high horse (pun intended), simply that at the end of the day you know he’s going to do the right thing. Don’t get me wrong, i love a morally ambiguous character too, and if I’m honest Gus’s outlook is certainly more realistic, but if i had to pick a favorite, i want the reliably good and wholesome over the self-serving. Not that im saying Gus is selfish at all, but of the two Shawns more our hero, even compared to his own cop father. I think Juliet is the only one who comes closest to matching that above and beyond heroism. I think the only reason she’s a step below is because Shawn simply notices others more. Thats all. If Juliet had Shawns abilities she’d be just as on top of it as him, probably more so. Actually she might get overwhelmed by seeing it all and not being able to help everyone. I think it’d be really hard for her to ignore sometimes. Which, okay I’m going down a tangent, but do you think Shawn had to learn to shut it off sometimes or like, learn to walk away? Cause i imagine day to day Shawn’s seeing people dealing with grief, abuse, or pain and with as kind as he is, it must be hard for him to ignore. Like if you’ve ever seen Daredevil, I’m imagining a less dramatic version of that haha

Henry will take any opportunity to point out Shawns failings or try to make him feel less than. Shawn tells him he’s there for a case and instead of asking him about it, Henry goes right back into you never could be a good handicapper because you lack the patience and follow-through it takes to put the time in and research. Also, the line “i let him talk to me” just doesn’t sit right with me even if the guy did turn out to be a skeeve. This kind of stuff makes me think Shawn either learned how to respect people from his mother or refused to treat people like his father. Probably both, though i hate to give her credit for anything haha

Look at his smile when he sees Lassie feed the horse. He’s so warmly amused by him. I wasn’t a Shassie shipper originally (as i just didn’t ship ppl in ye olden days) but i think I am now. I see it guys, I get it haha

These scenes are what makes the episode for me! I love them! We get to see both Shawns interacting and how he utilizes his vast memory, taking a peak into his mind palace so to speak. Plus he literally answered that common question of if you could go back in time what would you tell your younger self? (“Think big!”) I know they never really intended for this to be like a deep scene (nor expected certain fans to overanalyze it haha) but i like how he approaches the kid version of himself with a certain degree of amusement. Like I imagine if i was seeing my young self I’d probably be rolling my eyes at my sheer stupidity, but Shawns a lot kinder to himself haha Also little Shawns line “I thought I’d be bald by 20” was fucking gold! I wish I had better words for why this works so well but all i have is that it does and its brilliant.

Nice try Psych, your Canada is showing ;)

Heres some completely irrelevant info. The difference between a dreamcicle and a creamcicle: both are orange flavored, but dreamsicles had an ice milk center while a creamsicle was ice cream. And dreamsicles are no longer made.

I like this addition to the background. Its so cute. (Sidenote: this screenshot makes it seem like Shawn is the babyfaced assassin)

P.S This is the second episode ive seen him hold this frog. That is all.

[stevenbasic]

Growing into the Job, Post 414: Melissa Comes Home, p1

The side door cracked open bringing with it the cool air from the attached garage as Melissa Monroe, Office Manager for what was at the time Far Horizons Medical Associates, made her way into the house. “Sorry I’m a little late,” she apologized, announcing herself to whoever was here as she came into the kitchen, tossed her bag and the package from the clinic on the counter and stepped into the soaring great room. She dropped her shoes - her feet were killing her - right there on the spot. “I had to stop by Evolution. They’re kinda getting so annoying but I needed-”

She lowered her voice immediately. The house was dark, just a couchside lamp lit in the big living space. She had already sent ripples through the peaceful scene; she could feel the vibe of the home and smiled when she took it all in.

“Thanks for watching him, Rand.”

Her friend Randi had their boss and Melissa’s current boyfriend on the couch with her, across her lap and wrapped into the plush white robe she was wearing, one that belonged to Melissa’s mother, whose house this was. His head, shoulders and arms were nowhere to be seen, swaddled to her chest. Randi brought her finger to her lips. “Shhhhhhhhh….!”

“Oh! Is he sleeping..?” Melissa whispered excitedly as she tiptoed her way toward them with a big, big smile on her face. She felt so much better being near him. Evening had fallen, the lights were low, and she knew he’d- haha - had a very eventful day. It warmed her to see two of the people she loved most like this. Standing over the pair, watching the scene, she beamed.

Randi was wearing a white robe of her moms. Wrapped inside, his head suctioned to her teat, lay Melissa’s boyfriend. It was so cute.“ Ya I think he’s out,” Randi softly whispered as she looked down at the child-sized bulge in her robe, “He stopped sucking a half hour or so ago, but I honestly think he was asleep way before that.”

“Oh my gosh that’s too adorable,” Melissa gushed, still trying her best to stay quiet even though she was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to hear anything. She could sense that he was deep asleep and his mind was still. Plus, he was covered up by the robe; any sound they made would be muffled, and his hearing wasn’t very good anyway. Despite this, she was still careful, as she raised his thin little legs up so she could sit down beside the two, on Randi’s left. She lowered his legs back, fresh and naked, onto her lap  and across her powerful, pencil skirt thighs. She looked down on him, nice and exposed, as she playfully brought the fingers of her left hand to his knee. “He looks like he enjoyed his day with Auntie Randi.”

“Yeah he ‘enjoyed’ it alright…” Randi began, pausing as she did her math, “he enjoyed it five times. And…look at that. It looks like he’s getting ready to enjoy it again.” She paused again, nodding her chin over towards what was now slowly stiffening, growing up off his right thigh. “Do you think he knows you’re here? He seems happy to see you.”

“Ooooo five times? Is that right?” Melissa cooed, her eyes drifting down to the swelling erection which was systematically rising, rising, rising. They both watched it; it was an amazing sight. “Did Auntie Randi make you come five times? Hmm?” Her tone, speaking directly to his lower half again, was indulgent. It was as if she was speaking to a small child.

“I can’t believe how needy he is, Missy,” Randi said, beginning to lightly stroke his head through the soft fabric of the robe, though her eyes remained fixed on his member, “and how quickly he can recover.” Her voice, atypical for her, was low, quiet and tender. “You’ve really been training him well.”

“Well I’m sorry I wasn’t here to take care of him myself,” Melissa offered, “This little guy can be a handful.” She hissed, sucking air through her front teeth as she began to stroke his thigh with her left hand and cause his cock to surge to full mast, “Thank you so much for being here, helping him out when he needed it. I’m sure he appreciated it.”

They both watched as Dr. J twitched in - yes - appreciation.

“Oh don’t thank me, it wasn’t me. It was you,” Randi continued, “Every time we did it he was either watching your interview or looking at pictures of you or I was talking about you. Well, except for the time when I had his whole arm down my throat. But otherwise it was all you. Even now, he’s sucking my tit but I bet he’s dreaming about you. He really digs his new Mommy Girlfriend.”

Dreaming about me? Mommy Girlfriend? Melissa’s eyes dulled as she looked down at him, gazing deep.

She paused, watching his eyes slide back and forth behind his lids.

Mmmm Yep. He is. He’s dreaming me bigger.

“Aww that’s sweet.” Melissa replied, as her hand drifted under his swollen scrotum and rewarded his thoughts with a caress.

“‘Sweet’s’ got nothing to do with it, Missy. He’s a….nnnnnnn…”

Randi closed her eyes and groaned softly. She was  lost in a moment of rapture as Dr. J, in his dream-filled sleep, under the warm blanket of the white terrycloth robe, began to suck again at her right nipple.

Melissa giggled, encouraging the show as Randi recovered. She began drawing two delicate fingers up his purple, swollen shaft, tracing the path of his engorged, throbbing veins.

“…he’s a…uggh…he’s a fucking simp for you,” Randi continued, more breathless now and watching her friend gently take his impressive manhood into her huge, manicured hand, gripping it around the shaft. “H-he…he worships you,” she said.

“Mmmm…yeah…” Melissa purred, “not really. Not yet.”

Both women were watching him throb, balls clenching, veins pulsing. Melissa had him in her soft but powerful grasp and began to stroke him in a slow, gentle rhythm.

“…but I love it,” she admitted.

“Oh Christ,” Randi groaned, her eyes fluttering shut again as-

“Language…” scolded Melissa.

“S-s-sorry…”

-as his nursing behavior became more fervent under the robe. Slow but firm and now with purpose came Melissa’s strokes up and down, up and down. She could sense not only his pleasure coming, but Randi’s as well as she steadily brought them to a crest.

“M-Missy I…I…” Randi groaned, holding his head tight to her chest, letting her long tongue loll out of her mouth. The feel…the feel of his face plastered against her big tit, his mouth dry-nursing her nipple, it was like sex it was better than sex and she’d never been able to come through her nipple but- “If you keep doing that Missy...I’m gonna…he’s gonna…we’re gonna…”

“That’s right, that’s okay baby,” Melissa purred, speaking down to his needy cock but also to her friend, “I know what you need. Come for mama.”

In a small chorus of groans - one from her and one that came from under her robe - both Randi and Dr J came in unison, together, stoked and stroked to a sympathetic climax that washed over them both like a gentle wave. Randi’s came from her nipple, for the first time in her life, but she also felt something change deep within. There was this sense of satisfaction, this peace that she never thought she could have as she held Jay to her chest.

As if to christen the moment, Jay released spurt after spurt of come which splattered over the two of them, he and Randi, as he slept. His crescendo echoed in his dream until he was left dribbling all over Melissa’s left hand.

Melissa giggled, pleased with her efforts as she felt Randi growing right next to her.

Her friend was gasping, panting, clutching their little charge to her chest as her breast swelled into his face. He was still asleep.

“Jesus Missy…” Randi breathed, slowly coming back to reality, eyes refocusing, a little larger than she was just two moments ago, “and, I know, sorry. Language.”

Melissa giggled again. She was happy, so happy to be able to do this, to bring such pleasure and comfort to her little family. To be able to make them grow stronger. They were all becoming closer, bonding, and it was beautiful.

His come was pearly on her hand, opalescent in the semi-light. Melissa lay his cock down, tenderly, against his hip. She held her hand up, glistening, and lazily rubbed her fingers together. It was beautiful, really, the way it  caught the beams, the soft rays of light from the lamp. It glistened on its own, trailing down her hand and between her fingers.

Randi was staring.

“Do you want this?” Melissa asked her friend as, with great ceremony, she offered her hand to her friend. She brought it towards Randi’s face and Randi’s eyes were locked on hers as she opened her mouth and took her fingers in, sucking on them, taking the come the seed all its brine in a communion. Her eyes fluttered, the ecstasy of a divine experience, and she quietly sucked, and slurped, and ate it all from her friend’s hand.

When Melissa’s hand was clean and gone, wiped dry on his thigh, Randi leaned her head onto her friend’s right shoulder. Together the two women held him, his naked body laid across their laps, still sleeping under the robe.

“You need me to leave, don’t you?” Randi said after a time.

“Yes, but not just yet,” Melissa answered, leaning her own head onto Randi’s, “let’s sit like this for a while.”

================================

[pyschedtrickster]

TADC Ep 2 - Depression and the Meaning of Life

Well, I may or may not be a day late to release of the episode, but I've watched it three times so far and I have some thoughts. Let's get the gritty stuff outta the way.

First of all, The Amazing Digital Circus belongs to @gooseworx and therefore everything I say here is just my personal take on the episode. I could be wrong, talking out my ass, etc. But this episode really spoke to me, so good job Goose.

Secondly, spoilers <3

Third, I think I've written enough that people won't get jumpscared with spoilers. This is gonna be a long read, so bear with me. This post will contain ALL my thoughts on the episode, both meaningful and just silly things I liked.

BUBBLE

So anyone who knows me from Bunnydoll Burrow knows I love Bubble. They're my favorite so far and this episode only cemented that further. They're wonderful comedic relief and even if they don't have any character development (which I don't think they will), I will always love them.

Caine Cares Too Much

While watching this, I was immediately off-put by Caine's reactions, even beginning with him calling Zooble back. He sounds so... dire? I don't know if that was intended to mean something or if it was just to put emphasis on how much Caine cares about his creations. Caine is AI, so world-building is likely his ONLY goal, or his prompt if you will. It wouldn't surprise me if that was why he was so upset by everyone's reactions.

But I can't help but wonder if this will play into his character arc. We understand that Caine is ambiguous right now and there's no real explanation of what his intentions are in the Circus. Something about this just really set me off. It made me feel unsafe in a way as if staying behind would result in danger of some kind. Obviously, it couldn't be that bad, as Zooble did stay behind and turned out fine. Still, I can't shake the feeling that this is foreshadowing.

Zoobie

Hilarious. What a solid nickname, I've seen so many headcanons that Zooble would be a stoner in the real world. This only makes it better. They are now Zoobie in my mind.

Pomni's Child Comment

While I'm sure this was just a silly comment to be made, I kinda liked it. Just a little in-show reminder that through all of this, Pomni is a real, grown-ass woman stuck inside some digital Hell. The whole first episode, we see her wallowing and panicking, justifiably so. Finally, we get to see her grow more serious and stable.

Through the episode, we see more of her being a good character and becoming more at terms with her situation. I'll touch on this more soon.

Gangle

My girl CANNOT catch a break. Gangle is such a funny character and so, so sweet. She's level-headed in my opinion, even through her emotions. She seems to have a good grip on the shit happening around her but has a hard time communicating properly because she has a lot of feelings going on. Me too, honey, me too.

Even in the face of violence, danger, and overall shitfuckery, she doesn't shut down. Sure, she cries. But I've cried plenty of times while still holding the fort down. I think I just relate to her.

Lastly, I NEED to know what this means like I need oxygen.

Government Mandated Shipping

I dunno man, I just really liked this. I'm a shipper at heart. I've been writing fanfic since middle school. I saw pure fanfic material when I watched this scene.

Kinger and Raggs

This scene made me smile. It's a cute nod towards how Kinger is the longest-standing character and, according to some lost post of Goose's, Ragatha is the second. Plus, all of episodes one and two, we see her trying so hard to be a rock for Pomni. She tries to include everyone, keep everyone cheerful, and be a stable constant in a realm of chaos; Seeing Kinger recognize how far she's come and using that to bring her back to reason was just so refreshing. Ragatha deserves more appreciation like that: less about what she does for others, and more about what she's done for herself.

Jax's Disappointment

So we don't know much about Jax besides how Goose loves him and says he's an asshole who may or may not be irredeemable. When he started talking about violence and getting excited at the thought, I chalked it up to him being an ass. But it struck me just how much this mattered to Jax in this scene. I have questions, man. But I'm about to go on a wild tangent, so hear me out.

Jax is happy when being destructive. He gets immediately upset when things go well. And in the circus, we can assume that there have been a lot of traumatic, wild things that have occurred. I wonder if the chaos, the violence, is a comfort for Jax because of those traumatic experiences. As a person with trauma, I've learned that there's a funny cycle that I and other traumatized people experience.

We don't like the situations we're in, but when faced with normalcy, it's so much scarier than the damaging situation we come from. So, we run from 'normal' back into the suffocating arms of our traumatizing situations for comfort. Going back to the situation means more trauma, more trauma means a harder time finding peace in a safe, normal environment, which means more trauma... you get the picture.

So am I saying a fictional purple bunny is using violence in a digital realm to cope with the very real topic of trauma? Maybe. Yes. Yes, I am. This is how I cope.

Depression, Finding Your Place, and the Bigger Picture

Now you may be saying, "hey! You skipped over some major scenes to talk about silly stuff! What gives?"

Well, as the title of this post suggests, I had some heavier stuff to address in this episode and wanted to compile it all in one section. So that meant skipping over a scene to bunch it in with other ones. I'll break it down.

Depression

Let me begin with the fact that I have been diagnosed with depression for years now. I've been hospitalized for it and I've had family members struggle with it around me. This heavily influenced how I viewed this episode and specifically this scene.

Gummigoo had a perfectly reasonable reaction to seeing the perfect replica of him that is his model. Seeing something like that would shatter your world, and we see that happen to him immediately.

But when Gummigoo talked to Pomni and asked why anything matters, it gave me this really familiar feeling. Thoughts of being nothing, of feeling meaningless, the mere idea of being an obstacle--I've experienced all of these. I'm sure others have. Pomni was right when she said it's normal. Everyone has felt down from time to time.

But what Gummigoo is talking about really hit home with my depression. Thoughts like these, especially when they linger for long, change how you view the world. Everything is tinted blue and desaturated. You feel empty and eventually, so does the world around you. You feel like when the party is over and everyone leaves, you disappear--or you think you should, at least.

"Why are you trying to cheer me up? How does this benefit you at all?"

And it's so, so hard to accept help when feeling like this. Depression is a bitch in the way that it wants you to stay depressed. It feels like everyone around you wants you to feel better because it is a convenience for them. It almost feels transactional if you smile.

But Pomni says it so beautifully; "I guess I just don't want you to feel like you're nothing. I don't want anybody to feel like that."

The way she says it makes me feel like she knows the feeling too, and in reality, she says she does understand in a way how Gummigoo feels. But that? That made it real for me. I don't know why. This whole scene, the entrapment and loneliness despite not actually being alone, just embodied how I've felt for years. What amazing writing.

Finding Your Place

This scene was really the cherry on top of everything I just spoke about. We see that these two understand each other, at least as much as they can. They recognize all of this, it's ridiculous. They're hurtling through space into the unknown, hoping everything works out. They may feel empty, but they're not alone. They've got each other, for better or worse. Maybe they don't know where they belong in this liminal space, but they know where they stand in each other's minds.

And then we get this ending scene. God. Fuck.

I knew that there was obviously something to that dream Pomni had in the beginning, but somehow I didn't expect this to be the conclusion to it. I guess I was too distracted by everything else. So when I got to this shot, I got all warm and teary-eyed.

Pomni finally feels like she's got a pack, a place in this digital circus. When you don't feel mentally alone anymore, there seems to be a weight that's lifted off your shoulders. It doesn't cure the sadness, but at least you know that if you need to be picked up, someone will be there. Depression wants you to be alone, but it just lost that battle. The internet has said it best: A win is a win.

The Bigger Picture

We all know where the end of the road is. How we get there is the mystery. This thought can really make a person feel small, especially when depression comes in to tell you that you in fact are small, according to the chemicals in your brain. But the power of numbers and knowing your place in the world makes facing the unknown a little easier.

I'll be honest, the words are kinda lost on me at this point. Our demise is a really hard topic to broach. I've lost a lot of people, especially some major players in my life (shoutout to the Dead Dads club), and still, I don't understand it all. But the best way I can explain it is through my own experience and how I applied it to this episode.

I had for a long time gone through life trying to prepare and prepare. I played the role of the strong, unaffected individual after being hardened by trauma in childhood. I didn't want to be outwardly emotional, because if I was I would have to admit defeat.

It made me feel weak, especially when my depression would whisper nasty things to me about my self-worth. The bigger picture at that time didn't even exist in my mind. I lived to serve and die. It was no way to live.

Only recently, with time, a couple grippy sock vacays and therapy have I started to form my own, new big picture. At the center of this is my interactions with others. Family, friends, and strangers, all of them are affected by my actions. Even during the days when I feel worthless or alone, I remind myself that even the little things I do have a spiderweb effect. I have worth, more so than serving others or being some obstacle. I can simply walk down the street and perhaps I'll be the person who some kid looks at and hopes to look like when they're older. My existence is so much more than just a give-and-take situation with everyone around me.

It felt like Pomni found her purpose in the circus, and it was more than just playing along until the end. Rather, it was to befriend the people around her who have proved in one way or another way that they care. Abstraction wasn't in vain to them. Lives mattered, and therefore so did Pomni.

In a vast, digital world where chaos looms like a grey cloud, Pomni always mattered. She just had to realize how, and it was much more than being an obstacle or a pawn. And so do we, I think.