#pls someone understand the vision
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concept: digimon tamers x precure ✨
#digimon tamers#digimon#calumon#precure#crossover#for any curious#their names are#cure crimson#cure saint#cure mandala#cure shot#my art#pls someone understand the vision#digimon’s a magical girl show? always has been
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foolish one who never learned her lessons on her knees asking to change the prophecy pipeline. in this essay i will
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Does this mean anything to anyone
#pls tell me someone understands my vision#total drama#Alenoah#Alenoah fanart#total drama island fanart#total drama island#tdi#td#total drama au#au#infinity train
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#I've been driven insane by coe and attempting to draw the hub#So now you must be plagued by crappy memes#<3#But also they are so pink pony club core#Pls tell me someone understands my vision#torchwood#doctor who
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why are wolfstar lowkey 50% off rei and nagisa
#wolfstar#50% off#marauders#free!#pls someone understand my vision#sirius black#remus lupin#on a 50% rewatch and the marauders brainrot is real
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you know how dally says man in every other sentence? pony says tuh
like hell well freeze over before he says more than three sentences without saying tuh
this might be a southern thing now that i think abt it. but when ur disgusted/being rude or just soemthign negative adjacent, you say it with like a scoff at the beginning and then “uh-tuh”.
“ponyboy do this jacket make me look tuff?”“tuh! you look like *insert some dork from that time period*”
“ponyboy don’t forget your jacket after track today.”
“darry! tuh, when have i ever forgotten my jacket at track” (he only has one jacket at home because he kept forgetting them at track practice and they’ve accumulated in his locker)
*after doing some complicated style to his hair* “tuh i look good as all get out”
he probably even says it before he laughs at something
it’s gets him into a lot of trouble especially at school because he’ll hear something funny or a teacher will berate another student and under his breathe he just goes “tuh” with a smile that he’s obviously trying to hide and the adults always think he’s causing trouble or he’s back talking
#rip ponyboy but he’s me fr#he’s so corny i hate him#if yall can’t imagine it pls lmk because i can make an audio clip or something#idc but someone has to understand my vision#the outsiders#outsiders musical#ponyboy curtis#the outsiders headcanons
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Gravity Falls but dipper has dyslexia and can barley read ford's handwriting.
Like I think it'd be so funny bc a lot of ppl like to say stan has dyslexia but what if dipper (the dork who likes to read) does and he's over here not only trying to decipher these fuckass codes but also ford's cursive handwriting and stressing tf out over it.
Especially in like dire situations when they're under like gnome attack or smth and he's like "WHAT DOES THIS EVEN SAY???"
I just think it'd be neat guys ok
Pls tell me u guys understand my vision
#dipper pines#gravity falls#gravity falls dipper#au?#thoughts#free palestine#free gaza#thinking of stan and dipper bonding over struggling to read#i dont have dyslexia so idk much of how it can affect someone or if there are like glasses to help or not#but i like to think if dipper did have it#someone pls understand my vision
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i am so sorry about this, but for iconic and comedic purposes, and because i think it is my only chance...i think because put jk in all the clean, sleek, minimalistic dark academia fits ( and made him the fkn scariest top dom motherfucker alive >.> ) and put rm!stan as raven in all the thotty gothy hot topic rockstar boy looks ( ilu tiny pants ) ...
i think it's only fair that...
my bitchy, ginger, picky snobby ricky bobby ken doll son, AKA, red hot tire siren, toxic orange pit viper and mean green newjay devil -- who wears more comme de garcons/moshino than prada, imo -- espn celebpretty sh(it) boy, twitter's favorite #cred#head, /my/ precious daytona 500 winning pookie ( dirtbag ) and the #supreme tmz trashed-and-slated nastyboy of nascar racing, the one, the only...
Kyle 'Break Check!' Broflovski <3
should get to wear all the dramatic af, xxxtreme sportyspice, ubergay nightmarish perish hilton, twinky talladega nights, white #trashion, vodka&redheadbull, apple bottom jeans boots w the fur club fits <3
( also just for shits and gigs, pls note: toolshed stan is a super casual, fashionably challenged but unbothered old carhartt beanie, oversized flannel n beat up work boot wearin king...so i'm laaugghingsdk )
like...i am sorry, but this is the right answer:
#nina speak#everyone staring at me with bewildered eyes#TWINK KYLE????#listen!!!! i wanted some of the action okay#also u cannot tell me this is EXTREMELY CORRECT#i also don't know if he is that tall but its a force of habit#he just has ENERGY#like i can feel this in my BONES i know its just the most extra avant garde white boy wasted thot fit of all time#i am not sure if he does it bc he likes it or bc he wants attention yet but all i know is that he is slaying#and the people of south park are going to point and laugh#not mechanic stan tho bc he is nice ( a little under his breath badly disguised as a cough ) before raceky says something foul#like smh toolstan u should have been mean baby!!! don't let him call ur vintage safety goggles dorky king!!! stand ur ground#StAN FOR SOMETHING skhdlksad haha#but no it is giving the simple life#also i love toolshed stan he is just a backcountry rural colorado weed farm boy who is really good at fixing stuff#celebshitty kyle talking so fast it is...hurting his brain like he is fascinated by it...but is also like...are u perhaps having a stroke#ill do him next but like pls tell me someone understands the vision like its so specific and i destroyed the canon again#but i wanted to write a bitchy fingerbang kyle and this is my solution by writing obnoxious spoiled rotten racecar driver ky
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they need to cast jake gyllenhaal in a muppet movie
ever since i watched demolition (2015) that’s all ive ever thought about
he was just so muppet like in that movie
abd hes just so silly
someone let this man hang out with muppets
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appoggiatura (n.) – a musical ornament, used to express emotional yearning
musician au.
#two old men are friends#its my first time trying to make moodboards pls be nice :(#i just hope someone understands my vision#waaaa :(#for some reason i got nervous posting this dont look at me ok#AAAAA I CANT HIT POST#omg im gonna do it ok. ok
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speaking of trigun road trip plots, Im currently afflicted by another fic idea i’ll probably never write but please imagine with me:
a post-trimax au where Knives doesn’t create the apple tree with the last bit of his life force—what if he used it instead to bring Legato back from the dead. From Knives’ dying perspective, it was probably from some vaguely remorseful position of trying to undo how he inadvertently forced Vash to break his “no-killing” code on Legato by, ya know, un-killing him for Vash (and maybe possibly perhaps also due to whatever convoluted care he had for Legato under their deliciously fucked up dynamic).
And Legato would be absolutely pissed about it.
Legato choosing to force Vash to kill him is one of the few blatantly autonomous choices we see Legato make—and Knives took it away from him. After everything, not even his death is his own. A slap in his face from his savior. And to top it off he comes back wrong and has to relearn his psychic thread abilities
Anyways, something something Livio stumbles upon him and finds out what Knives did. Insert road trip montage adventure of them reluctantly traveling together to find Vash because
Livio is scared shitless that Vash might kill himself as well trying to bring back Wolfwood the same way (but will never admit to the conflict he feels about the fact that there is technically a way to get his brother back)
Legato has decided he is in fact quite resentful of Knives for bringing him back and is now dead set on killing Vash as the ultimate “fuck you” to Knives, who centered everything he did around Vash (but he has not told Livio this plan)
also Razlo’s there
#someone pls say they understand my vision#this probably wouldnt even be a shippy thing between l/r and legato more like coworkers turned reluctant allies turned not quite friends(?)#not enoigh content about livio/razlo interacting with legato#im putting these fucked up boys together for the worlds worst playdate#i just think they could probably Get Each Other on some level ok#if u separate legato a little bit from his fucked up obsession w knives at least#trigun#trigun maximum#trigun spoilers#livio the double fang#razlo the trip of death#legato bluesummers#hahns speaks#long post
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Call me Terra Nullius with the way I'm waiting to get ploughed
#THIS IS ALSO A VERY HISTORY AND LEGAL JOKE#we invoking the imperialist vision with this#pls someone tell me you understand this pls#this is all I could think of in my elective course today lmao
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JUST ONE HOUR!
tags: exhusband!toji x fem!reader, businessman toji (guys pls he’s rich in this </3), petnames, smut (p in v), unprotected, mentions of reader being a mother again, etc. mdni.
w.c: 1.4k
a/n: sawryy been kinda ia bc of uni </33
you step into the crowded venue alone, the air thick with chatter and the lively notes of a string quartet filling the beautifully decorated hall. everyone around you is dressed elegantly for your ex-husband’s extravagant charity event. you hadn’t wanted to show support for him, but after much convincing from your friends and children, you reluctantly gave in, promising yourself you’d only stay for an hour.
as you navigate through the crowds of familiar faces, many of your old friends greet you, their compliments on your long, black, sparkly dress feeling insincere. awkwardly making small talk, you realize how distant you’ve become from these people since your divorce from toji.
“how are your children, mrs. fushiguro?” a married woman asks, her arm linked tightly with her husband’s—who, as you know, is traveling abroad to cheat on her.
“i’d prefer if you didn’t call me fushiguro; we’re not married anymore, remember?” you respond, lifting your empty ring finger to emphasize your point. gasps of shock ripple through the group at your “rudeness.”
“oh, darling, I completely understand your desire to drop the fushiguro name. it’s not like you have the charm or elegance to carry it anyway,” another married woman chimes in, laughter erupting around you, igniting a fiery rage in your chest.
“honestly, if toji were with someone like me, I’d take care of his every need in ways you can only dream of. I know how to keep a man satisfied, which is clearly something you’re not equipped for,” a third woman interjects, pushing your anger to its peak. the background chatter fades away as your breathing becomes heavy and your vision narrows.
“well, it’s a shame you think you’re so special because, from what I hear, your husbands are cheating on you. I guess when you can’t satisfy them, they go looking elsewhere—”
before you can finish, toji strides in from behind you. his large hand snakes around your waist, pulling you closer to his broad chest as he leans down to your ear. “easy, brat. I can’t let you go on with that mouth of yours,” he scolds, his warm breath sending shivers down your spine. you can’t help but hitch your breath at the intoxicating scent of his cologne.
the expressions of the married women shift, their eyes darting to their husbands, who stammer awkwardly at their words. you suppress a giggle as chaos erupts around you, arguments bubbling up as they turn on their partners. with everyone distracted, you push toji’s hand away from your waist and turn to scoff at him. but fuck, he looks good. his black, luxurious suit hugs his frame perfectly, the white button-up shirt undone just enough to reveal a hint of his toned chest. toji smirks, the scar on the corner of his lips rising as he notices how you scan him.
you push past the crowd, making your way up the large spiral staircase while exchanging polite greetings with those you pass. you can feel his eyes boring into your back—an almost burning sensation—as you glance over your shoulder to catch him in the sea of wealthy businessmen, sipping on champagne. your heart races when you see him flaunting the matching wedding ring you once shared, its brilliance shining in the bright venue.
hastily, you rush up the steps, opening door after door in search of an unoccupied washroom. frustration mounts with each locked door, but hope reignites when you spot double doors at the end of the hall. as if your prayers have been answered, the doors swing open to reveal the most beautiful room you’ve ever seen—a private lounge. your eyes sparkle as you take in the elegant decor, complete with a private kitchen and balcony.
your heels clack against the polished marble floor as you place your clutch on the large island table, relief washing over you as you settle into the quiet space, far removed from the pretentious crowd downstairs.
“trying to slip away? don’t pretend you’re not enjoying the chase; I know you’d miss me way too much,”
a low voice booms in the serene atmosphere, startling you. you turn to see toji standing there with his hands in his pockets, slowly striding toward you until he’s right in front of you, looking down at you with a smirk.
“you look so good, doll,” he says, his voice low as he leans against the island table, biting his lower lip as he admires your figure in the elegant dress.
and you really—really tried to resist him.
but it was impossible to think straight with the way he was pounding into you, hitting every perfect angle and reaching the deepest parts of your throbbing hole. your slick walls clenched around his thick shaft, making it all the more maddening. toji had you bent over the island table, your dress bunched up around your waist, leaving your bare ass exposed in the private lounge. your eyes rolled back as his relentless thrusts sent waves of pleasure crashing through you, his grip on your hips nearly bruising. the room filled with the sinful sounds of skin slapping and the broken melodies of your moans mingling with his low groans.
“my. . . pretty. . fuckin’. . wife.” toji growled, each word punctuated by a deep, punishing thrust that slammed into your sweet spot, sending jolts of pleasure through your trembling body. his hand shot up, tangling in your hair as he yanked your head back, forcing your back to arch while he relentlessly pounded into you.
“t-toj’—” you stammered, your voice barely coherent between breathless moans, your body jerking with each rough thrust. “’s too m-much…” your words trailed off into high-pitched whines, your mind too hazy to form anything more than desperate pleas.
leaning down, his lips brushed against your ear, his hot breath igniting every nerve in your body. “you can take it, you’re a big girl,” he rasped, nibbling on your earlobe, his voice dripping with dominance. “look at you, babbling for me.”
the wet, obscene sound of your cunt squelching around him only fueled his pace, your moans intertwining with the sinful symphony as he continued driving into you without mercy, pulling more helpless words from your lips.
in a swift motion, toji hoisted your leg up, his grip firm and unrelenting, holding it in place as his hips snapped forward at a brutal, faster pace. the new angle sent shockwaves through you as his thick tip pressed deeper, practically rearranging your insides. the intense sensation made you crumble, barely able to hold yourself together as he drove you closer to the edge with every thrust.
“gonna make you a pretty mama again, mmm? all filled up.” toji rasped in your ear, his voice low and teasing as you sobbed loudly, tears spilling down your cheeks, nearly drooling at the thought of being filled to the brim. a smirk tugged at his lips when he felt you clench around him,
so fuckin’ nasty, he thought.
he snaked the hand on your neck down to your sensitive nub, pinching your clit between his fingers and sending jolts of pleasure coursing through you as your leg began to shake.
“i can feel it—hahh— you in my tummy,” you whimpered, the realization igniting a rush of pleasure and desperation within you. toji lost it at your words, his breath hitching as he looked down, watching the outline of your stomach stretch against the fabric of your dress, the bulge unmistakably visible.
the sight drove him absolutely feral, a primal hunger surging through him. “hn, f-fuck, baby,” he whimpered, the words slipping from his lips as he struck even harder, each powerful stroke pushing you closer to your limits.
“mr. fushiguro, i-it’s time for your speech.”
your heart dropped at the sound of a female voice behind the doors, a stark reminder of the world waiting just outside. but toji—oh, toji—his primal instincts kicked in, and the thought of being interrupted only fuelling his desire to finish inside you. nothing would stop him from pleasing his baby.
“t-toj’… you— ngh— you have to go…” you squeaked, desperation lacing your voice as he harshly slapped your slick, throbbing cunt, the sound echoing in the otherwise silent room. your thighs sticky as cobwebs of your arousal clung to his fingers, causing you to tremble uncontrollably.
“upp we go,” a smirk spread across toji’s face as he stepped back, maintaining his cock snug against your gummy walls. with a firm grip, he lifted both of your legs, carrying you as he approached the doors leading to the balcony where the majority of the guests awaited his speech.
fuck.
“just a little longer, baby,” he growled, his voice dripping with satisfaction. “i want them all to know you belong to me.”
#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#jjk fanfic#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#toji fushiguro x reader#toji x reader#toji smut#toji fushiguro smut#toji x reader smut#fushiguro toji x reader#toji x you#toji fushiguro#toji fushiguro x you#anime smut#jjk x reader smut#smut
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Toxic bff Abby that denies she is in love with you but is extremely possessive over you and basically treats you like her gf, but still fucks other girls imagining you; getting jealous seeing ANYONE else come near you. NEED IT PLS
toxic!bff!abby x reader
Abby’s so insecure and she lets it rule everything she does. she can't seem to get it right -- more plot and angst than i intended. lesbian smut under the cut - men and minors dni
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it happens every time. abby gets drunk when you have a fight and does something stupid to forget about you. she could see you dancing up against her from the rival basketball team. and although abby would usually rip you from their arms and dance with you herself — feel your ass grind up against her crotch, let you control where her hands went as you dance — she can’t do that tonight.
abby had seen you at the bar for the pre-party, the girl you’re with buying you drinks, resting her hand on your thigh, inching ever so close to your face and leaning in for a kiss, and abby seethed with every brush of your lips. finally seeing red when you get down from your bar stool to stand between her legs.
abby could see the girl you were with now and it coloured her vision crimson. ellie fucking williams. of all people you could flirt with. abby had to think you were being vindictive — trying to get back at her for when she ditched you to get with tammy instead of take you to an art gallery like she’d promised for weeks.
It wasn’t completely her fault although abby could come up with a million excuses to absolve herself but the prevailing one would always be that she was a fucking coward. it felt too much like a date. a real date that she wants to take you on — not as her friend. but abby couldn't stand the thought of you rejecting her.
she could see it so vividly in her head -- you turning away from her, your face contorted in distaste "but abby, we're just friends." you would say "i could never see you like that." and abby would understand. because you were too good for her -- too smart, funny, kind, you gave her too many chances because your heart is so big. abby didn't deserve someone who could colour the world and scrub out the black and white monotony of every day life.
abby didn't realise she was gripping your arm so tight it could be bruising, she'd been glowering down at ellie, seething and her mouth practically foamed with her hard ragged breaths. "the fuck is wrong with you anderson?" ellie snarls, abby twists her mouth and "you, are all over my best friend,"
"and you're best friend -- who is right here -- is fine with it," you snatch your arm from abby's grip. you couldn't even fight her at this point. she was colder to you recently, she sold you excuses for her distance, came to your apartment still dewy and smelling like someone else. she'd been rubbing it in your face that she wanted nothing to do with you. you ignored that she didn't reply when you'd casually told her you loved her after she dropped you off at home last week. but you couldn't keep walking into apartment as other women walked out past you, a drunken smile plastered on their faces. she did this every few weeks and you were sick of it, but this time was worse than usual.
"go hang out with tammy or whoever," you back into ellie rubbing your arm and abby swallowed, her eyes catching yours -- hollow as they'd never been when looking at her. but just last week you had told her you loved her. could that change so quickly? had she gone too far? abby's fists clenched, bouncing on her weak knees.
"I- we need to talk," abby says without thinking and she immediately wanted to punch herself.
'talk about what?' abby thought to herself, she could never tell you that she loved you back, that more than that she worshipped you. she could neve tell you that every time she looked at you -- she fought not to let her face heat up. abby couldn't tell you that her chest puffed up with pride that she could call you -- something so precious hers. her best friend. you are the only person she ever wanted to be around really.
"I'm leaving," you say with a deep breath as ellie puts a few paper bills on the bar counter, one in the tip jar and slides her hand onto the small of your back. "get yourself together. i'll see you later maybe."
now abby had to watch you dance with ellie, smiling with your arms draped over should shoulders while ellie whispered in your ear. she downed her shot and then decided not to beat ellie up because she didn't want to be benched the entire season. so, instead she put her jacket on and approached you with her head hanging low.
your movements halt as abby stands near the both of you, "can we talk?" abby asks, her watery blue eyes slowly rising to meet yours. you sigh and turn to kiss ellie's cheek goodnight before leading abby out of the house and down the street.
"I'm really sorry," abby says as you walk slow into the crisp autumn evening.
"for what abby?"
"everything," she shrugs and tries a chuckle but coughs awkwardly when you glare at her. "so, you don't have anyone to take home tonight?" you question and abby sighs, running her hands over her face. "come on, don't be like that," abby says and stops in front of her truck opening the passenger door for you.
"I'm not getting in unless you tell me what you're sorry for."
abby groans, clenching her jaw and resting her hands against her bumper, leaning on it and ducking her head.
"I'm sorry I've been such a sloppy asshole this week. I'm sorry i tried to make you jealous and I'm sorry that I didn't reply when you said it. because I should have."
you know what abby is talking about but god, she can't even say it. it fucking wrecks you because she doesn't value you enough to even tell you what you mean to her, if you mean anything at all. you start to walk past her, "hey wait, oh my god -- I love you!"
abby yells, her mouth parts but no other words come to her. she swallows thickly when you turn around, the tears on your face matching hers.
"I'm sorry I'm a fucking idiot and I didn't tell you sooner but i don't love you like a friend. I am in love with you, okay? and - and I'm a shitty person and I don't wanna mess us up,"
abby can't stand your silence but when she looks up, there you are. standing so close to her she can feel your warm breath on her cheeks.
"do you promise to at least give us a chance?"
abby, cups the back of your neck and presses a soft kiss to your mouth as her answer, pulls your body flush to her so she can lean over you and lick into your mouth. moan as you suck on her tongue.
"m'sorry, so sorry sweetheart," abby whispers in between kisses as she feels your tears on her cheeks, "let me make it up to you."
abby drives you not far down the road to her place, her hand on your all the time, pressing kisses to your knuckles until she shuts the door behind you and kisses you again, this time her hands going down to your ass, gripping and squeezing, her mouth beginning to pepper kisses up and down your neck.
you whine when abby backs you into the hallway of her loft, behind the kitchen wall ands falls on top of you on her bed. "i swear to god, everything will be different," abby moans, as you grip her hand and bring it to your breast, where she takes the liberty to start pressing kisses to your chest, removing your clothes feverishly. you whine as she pulls away from you, catching her breath.
"do you not?" you ask shakily and abby cups your cheek.
"i do, i do. i just wanted it to be different. I didn't want to be fighting with you." abby whimpers when you grip her and pull her close so she's laying on top of you. "then, show me it'll be different."
abby takes her time lathering you chest when she removes your bra, kissing your tits and moaning as she sucks your nipples into her mouth, her hips starting to falter against you thigh. no matter how many women she'd been with. she never could get off. she didn't feel much of anything unless she thought of you, played your three words over and over again in her mind. but now, now she had the real thing and she's too desperate stop herself.
she flicks her fingers over your wet nipples, "so fucking pretty," she whines against you, massaging your tits and sucking marks between your chest as she pulls them close to her chest, moaning and grinding down on your hips going again to suck and swap nipples to wet and play with while your hips started to buck against hers.
"shit fuck, m'gonna cum, fuck i'm so sorry," she's utterly embarrassed, hides her face in your neck and she whines loudly, her fingers still playing with your nipples as she cums. you gasp and chuckle, unbelievably wetter at watching her cum just from sucking on your tits.
"i'm so fucking sorry-" "for what? for feeling good?" you mumble and press a kiss to her mouth, guiding her hand between the two of you so she can feel how wet she's making you, "always been a mess f'me," she groans, her fingers starting to circle your clit, hearing you moan she ducks her head into your neck again to kiss and mark you.
"i love you," abby moans as her fingers dig into your panties and start to slide into you, your gummy, wet walls inviting her in. "christ, you're so wet," she moans and she kisses down your torso and removes your shorts and panties, her mouth latching to your clit and she starts moaning, licking and twist her head so she's making circles on your clit while her fingers curl and fuck into you.
"fuck, abby! yes, yes please more," you yelp, your legs falling open and abby pulls them over her shoulders licking the wetness around her fingers in your cunt and groaning as she does so at your taste, another finger twisting into your sweet pussy she can't help but grin against you, licking and lapping at your clit, as you cum, her thumb coming to circle it instead.
"you look so pretty all fucked out f'me," she moans, pressing a hand down on your belly and fucking her fingers deeper, moaning at the way your mouth falls open, and your legs start to shake, "i love you, i fucking love you baby," she whines and you're spurting against her hand, licking up over your clit and sucking it, your taste filling her mouth.
"swear i'm gonna be better, i promise," abby says as she gently caresses you, cupping your cheek and rubbing her hands over your body. abby silently presses a sticky kiss to your temple and disappears as you catch your breath.
"haven't used it with anyone else," abby assures you when you look at her strap on quizzical and yet biting your lip as she clambers over you. "you're everything to me, i'm so sorry for everything," abby says as she lines herself up with you, her strap already covered in lube. you nod when abby hovers over you and she sighs when she finally sinks into you, your eyes crossing at the way it curls perfectly into your gspot, the ridged cock stimulating every part of your pussy.
"was saving this for you- fuck," she whimpers as the strap starts to vibrate against her and you whine loudly as it tremors inside you. "wanted to feel this good with you and you only" she moans gasping into your mouth as you press her close when abby starts to fucking into you.
you're both so overstimulated it doesn't take much of her deep, wet thrusts until you're crying against her shoulder, biting into it as you both cum again. you push abby out at the pain of the overstimulation and she rips the strap off of her in the same manner, turning it off.
after abby rocks you both to sleep, she's woken by her phone ringing, at reading the caller ID she moves into her bathroom, pressing a kiss to your shoulder and whispering into the phone.
"i fucking told you not to call," abby whispers, turning over to look at your sleeping form under her sheets.
"no, tammy -- enough. I'm done fucking around," she groans and near hangs up until tammy whispers something over the line, something you can't quite make out, all you can hear is.
"jesus christ, okay, I'll be over soon."
"where are you going?" you ask as abby gets dressed, "tammy-" "are you fucking serious?" you chuckle in disbelief pulling your clothes on in a hurry.
"no, you don't understand -- wait!" abby calls as you pick your jacket up from off the floor and shuffle your shoes on.
"I'm done waiting for you abby. you couldn't even last a day."
"please, stay -- i just, you don't understand," abby pleads, holding onto your forearm.
"then explain,"
abby fumbles for something, anything. you weren't supposed to hear anything, you were supposed to stay asleep. abby just needed to be gone a few hours, she just needed to take care of things with tammy one last time and then she was yours. she just wanted to make sure.
"so, you're not sure you love me?" you roll your eyes as abby rubs her face in her hands.
"if i stay, abby, what does that say about me?" you sniffle and snatch your arm from her grip for the last time today.
"i hope you get what you're looking for anderson," you nod and pull your phone out of your pocket, texting ellie to pick you up if she was still awake.
ellie: be there in 2 mins.
"see you around," you purse your lips and close the door behind you, your ears rushing with blood so loudly you can't hear abby breaking into sobs behind the door.
tags: @lesbian-useless @sexysapphicshopowner @iamaboringrattat @sapphicsgirl @bimboprincezz
#lesbian#lesbian smut#abby tlou smut#abby tlou#abby anderson smut#nsft lesbian#abby tlou x reader smut#tlou smut#tlou x reader smut#abby anderson x reader smut
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Tormented Spirit | 3
Part 1 2 3 4
"Is it such a sin to stand up for yourself?" you mutter as tears blur your vision. The way he reacted was visceral, instinctive even. "You never have to stand up for yourself ever again," says Daemon, reaching a hand to you, "come."
Daemon Targaryen x Hightower!Reader | 4k+ | cw: fem!reader, reader has brown hair, wife!reader, twin!Gwayne, arranged/forced marriage, canon divergence, alternate universe, slow burn, DD:DNE, noncon/dubcon, implied smut/cunnilingus, panic/anxiety attacks, daddy issues/child abuse/family problems, mentions/depictions of mental/physical/psychosomatic illness, ye old misogyny, angst, typos, etc.
A/N: pls comment and reblog because 🥲 i wanna nuke this again and could use the reassurance | cross posted on ao3
tagging: @arabellasleopardcoat
You are changed after that, you both are. When Caraxes lands in the dragon pit, Daemon helps you down, something he's never done. The prince knits his brows in offence when you break away from his hold. You walk towards the two knights in white cloaks, gazing in wonder, "twins."
You look between them, smile spreading across your face as you tried to make out one for the other. You point to the one on the left, "Ser Arryk?"
The man smiles back and nods, "well met, princess."
You giggle and clap you hands, "tis dumb luck." You turn to the other, "greetings, Ser Erryk. A pleasant afternoon to you."
You feel someone come up behind you.
Erryk returns your smile and bows, "a pleasure to meet your acquaintance, my princess."
You look over your shoulder as Daemon places a hand on your waist. He looks between them, "you need not follow. I will be with my wife until later this evening."
Your brows quirk, "you will?"
Daemon turns to you, lip curving upward, "don't you wish to know the pleasantness of fucking in one's bed?"
In unison, the Cargyll brothers turn away and clear their throats. Meanwhile, your heart leaps into mouth and your jaw hangs low. You cannot even speak as you feel your face burn. Your devilish husband chuckles and rubs your back, "worry not. You'll find yourself making noises soon enough."
With that, the twins step aside and you cower into Daemon's shoulder as he leads you off. He laughs, both in mockery and amusement, enjoying your reaction thoroughly. There was something in the way you retreated into him that made his chest uneasy. The feel of your forehead upon his arm was rather unnatural. He does not like the effect on him, so he pushes you away.
You squeak at the sudden action. Your features spare no reflection of your confusion and hurt.
Daemon grins at it, then pulls you back in, one arm snaking around you.
Your face falls back into a state of rest, that is until his hand begins to travel up your breast. You whimper at his squeeze, "D-Daemon."
He hums, "feels good, doesn't it?"
Your hands tremble as you bring it up to his. You slowly push him away, "later."
His brow quirks. Defiance?. He drags you across him, eliciting another squeak as he traps you between his body and the stone wall. Your heart begins to race when he gathers your skirts. You press your hand on his chest, "Daemon-"
"Is this not my right?" he hangs his head low to press his nose upon your jaw, "if I take you here in this hall, I would only be exacting the will of the gods for a married man and woman."
You squeeze his shoulders, "but there are peo-"
"People should know of my efforts to produce an heir."
Your body burns at the thought. But then, you both turn to the side upon hearing the sound of skidding and footsteps running off.
"Daemon!" you whine, hiding into his chest.
That's enough. He smirks then looks down at you. He releases your skirts in lieu of taking your hand. "Very well, prudish wife. I will claim you in our marriage bed, as you insist."
And Daemon does, right after he claims you against your chamber door and your vanity table. In truth, you do not understand how he had the wits about him to leave bed when it was all over.
The next morning was strange. It felt like a dream, in both parts that you enjoyed yourself coupling with your husband, and that you could not believe the turn of events. You get out of bed when your servants come to rouse you with a, "good morn, milady."
"Good morn," you stand, pushing your long hair behind you. Your servants giggling catches your attention. Your forehead curls inquisitively.
"The prince is a very passionate lover, milady."
You are bewildered by the sudden remark.
"Shall you wear a turtleneck today?" one says.
"Or perhaps a large necklace?" the other adds.
You look into the mirror and only then do you realize why they were offering such things. Red and purple blossomed on your throat, travelling even beyond the collar of your nightgown. Your body burns and you promptly cover yourself.
Your servants giggle and come to your side, "you need not hide from us, your grace."
"My cousin works in a brothel and she has— aw!"
You watch as one of them rubs their arm. The other who had pinched her turns back to you, "many apologies, your grace."
"Apologies," she mutters, rubbing her arm.
You stare at the two of them, feeling something bitter creep up your throat. "Did you..." you take a deep breath, "mean to say your cousin has... lain with my husband?"
She give you an apologetic expression, "forgive me, I-"
You cut her off with your nod, "you need not say more. I would like never to hear about this in future."
The two curtsy and speak no more as they ready you for the day.
By the time you're dressed in a modest turtleneck dress, and your brown hair is braided and adorned with silver pins, there is a knock on your door. You open the door yourself, dismissing your servants on the way.
"Ah," you smile at the sight of Cargyll, "good morrow, ser."
He bows, "good morrow, princess."
You rub your hands together as you examine his face, "... is it Erryk before me?"
He smiles, shaking his head, "tis Arryk with you this morn."
"Ah," you raise a finger, "you misheard me, ser. I clearly said Arryk and not Erryk."
Arryk chuckles softly and nods, "apologies, your grace."
"Perhaps you might teach me how to tell you apart," you mutter, "as a twin myself, I would be most offended if someone mistook me for my brother."
His laugh is more pronounced this time. He links his hands together as he thinks momentarily, "well, I would say he is uglier than I, but then again, he has my face."
You giggle under your breath. You bring a hand to your lips, "I understand you completely."
"As of late," he rubs his chin, "my beard has become longer."
You hum, "good to know." You exit your room, closing the door behind you, "have you broken fast, ser Arryk?"
"Indeed."
"Oh," you pause, "... you... would not happen to know where Prince Daemon is, would you?"
He turns to his feet.
You raise your brows.
"Would you like to know the truth?"
You stiffen at the thought, "...yes, ser. Always."
"Last I heard he was drinking with Gold Cloaks in Fleabottom," he mutters before looking up at you.
"I see," you say softly, "I— thank you for your honesty."
He nods, "of course, my princess."
You needlessly inspect your fingers, "my siblings would be eating with my father," you turn to Arryk, "and I do not wish to face him. I am sure he would say the same about me."
He clenches his jaw. He remembers the argument yesterday, and how Lord Otto moaned and hissed as Arryk escorted him out the maester's ward.
"Do you mind accompanying me as I break my fast?" you mutter, "I do not like eating alone."
He bows his head, "it is my duty to accompany you wherever you may go."
"... Ah," you look to your feet. You meant to offer that he drink a cup of tea with you, but the thought becomes preposterous the longer it lingers. He is not your friend. You have no friends in the Keep, "yes... it is."
Arryk knits his brows then finds himself correcting, "but I do not mind it at all. It is my pleasure to serve."
You offer him a soft smile. He is taken slightly off-guard by the sadness he catches in your eyes, which is why he does not smile back.
As you masticated your first meal of the day, you absentmindedly mashed your food while looking out the window. You longed to seek refuge in your twin, but you knew it would not be long until your father came around to chew you out. It would only be worse if you went to your sister, though, if she was under the refuge of her princess, perhaps not.
You decide it would probably be better for you to look for your husband, for after all, you were no longer a Hightower.
Arryk watches how your hair blows with the wind. He remains five paces behind you at all times. You were a lonesome thing, he thought, fragile and melancholic. You appeared as though you were searching for someone, and yet your gait felt rather aimless. Suddenly, your back straightens when you spot something— someone from across the hall, in turn, so does his.
Before you could speak his name, he calls out yours and smiles at you. Daemon even adds, "there you are. I've been looking everywhere for you."
Your brows quirk as you walk towards each other.
Arryk allows an extra five paces to come between you.
You examine your husband's face, the dimples on his cheeks, the silver hair tickling his curled lips. You simultaneously feel the urge to push his hair away and debate whether or not his fair expression is truly borne form the fact he was searching for you and has now found you.
Your brows furrow as he tucks his hair behind his ear.
Is this what sex does to a man?
"Come," he says, grabbing you, "we mustn't delay."
Your heart races as you look at your arm. He tucks it underneath his own and hastily leads you off somewhere. You do not know where your feet take you, but you do know that the prince looks lovely when he speaks through a grin, just as he does now.
In truth, you catch not a single word from his mouth, which is why you are turned to stone when he begins kissing you. However, whatever rigidness your form holds quickly melts as his lips urge yours to a slow dance. You go putty against the window sill he pushes you against.
There is peace in the warmth he radiates. Your fingers finally find what they had longed to touch and unabashedly crawl up his nape to tangle in the roots of his hair. When he moans and pulls away, you stiffen and come back to reality. Had you hurt him?
"Daem-"
He turns about and says, "ah, Lord Hand."
Your stomach drops. You feel sick as you peak past Daemon's shoulder to see exactly him, glaring at the both of you.
"Or shall I call you father?" the prince grins, as to show the venom on his teeth.
"It would do you good to comport yourself," Otto blurts, face calm, but you knew better to believe he was anything but.
He tilts his head, "what for?"
Your heart squeezes when Daemon takes your hand and brings you to his side. You cannot bare to look at your father as your husband speaks, "you have created such a desirable creature. It would be more tactless of me not to worship her body with my own."
You feel your breath quicken as you hear your father grumble.
Daemon is victorious to see the old man walk away with a dark cloud over his head. He chuckles, "do not be so sullen, my lord. Tis a fine day!"
You feel your palms go sweaty. You lick your lips frantically. You screw your eyes shut, trying to calm yourself.
He chuckles as he turns back to you, "very goo-"
Your brows tighten.
Daemon catches your chin between his fingers. You are forced to open your eyes and you see the glimmer in his violet one as he repeats, firmer this time, "very good."
Your heart does not calm though he rubs your back.
"You did well for me."
Your eyes begin to water, "Daemon, I-"
"Shh," he shakes his head, "there's no need for this."
"I—'ve upset him. "
He feels your body begin to tremble beneath his palm.
"But-"
"You spoke the words yourself, he's tormented you, has he not?"
"D-Daemon-"
"Shh, shh, shh," he leads you back to the window sill and sits you down.
You are gasping for air at this point, but he does not stop hushing you. He even begins to rub your cheeks with his thumbs. He pushes himself into your skirt, making room for himself between your legs. You gawk at him as he mumbles in a language you do not understand. He is impossibly close, as though you were kissing without kissing.
You do not know how many minutes pass, but you do know his timbre is just as serene as the voice of water. You only realize you had been crying when you take his wrists and feel water drip to your fingers.
He speaks that language again and you shake your head, "I do not understand."
"It does not matter," he mutters, pulling away to examine your face, "you are calm, no?"
You cannot reply because the sensation of his rubbing your cheeks is far too arresting.
"There is magic in the High Valyrian," he says, pulling away. It is so abrupt and unwanted that you chase after his hold and involuntarily attempt to stand.
Of course, Daemon is the way and prevents you from doing such a thing. His head inflates ten sizes bigger upon unveiling how deeply affected you were of him. But as he looks at your wet cheeks, he thinks, how could such a pathetic creature not be so affected by one such as he. He further amuses himself by tracing your collarbones.
Your body tingles at his gentle thouch.
"Think of it as revenge."
Your lips part and brows knit, "r-revenge?"
"Yes," he taps your nose, "to your tormentor."
You gulp and clench your jaw. Daemon grins, but you are no longer blinded by it. "I- I do not-"
"Your very existence is torment to him, is it not?" he tilts his head, "must I remind you of your own words, my love?"
You are flabbergasted by the pet name, but before you could even tell yourself he did not mean such words, his airy chuckles tells you himself. You turn to your lap.
Daemon takes your chin again, "look at me."
Your heart races and your breath heavies.
"You want to be a dutiful wife, yes?"
Your release a deep sigh through parted lips, "... yes."
"It pleases me greatly to watch your cunt father suffer," Daemon rubs your chin before releasing it, "that is all I require of you."
Your brows furrow.
"Then you are free to do all that you desire, notably all those that your father has forbade."
"I-" wait, what?
Daemon catches the way your face shifts when his words finally click. His grin only deepens as he nods, "yes, yes. If he did not let you go out and play, oh, I do so beg you to play at your heart's content."
Your lips part further at the thought.
"But be sure to always play with me when I so desire," he says, cupping your cheek, "I do not like to be kept waiting."
Your heart skips a beat when he swipes your lips before walking off. He nods once at ser Arryk, who you had no idea was still here.
The said man then walks over to you, offering you an arm, "princess."
You look at his armored limb and feel sheepish. He must think you uncouth and ill-bred upon witnessing what he did. You take his arm— amongst sickly and feeble. You weakly mutter, "thank you."
"Would you like me to escort you to the maester's office?"
"W-wha- why?" you stand.
His brows tighten, "you were having an attack, were you not?"
You release his hand and step away from him. You smile softly and shake your head. He watches as you clasp your hands together. "They would only supply me milk of the poppy to ease my pain. There is no medicine for my affliction, Arryk."
He nods, "I see. Th-"
"Apologies. May I call you Arryk?"
He nods once more, "you may call me whatever you so desire, princess."
You smile, "very well," you turn to your feet, "I desire to call you by your name. You may do the same with me," you lift your gaze but do not turn to him, "I admit, the title princess does not suit me."
As you walk, Arryk follows closer this time, "it suits you well for you are a princess."
You sigh and smile at him from over your shoulder.
For the rest of the day, you retreat to your chambers and lay in bed. You stare at the ceiling, repeating over and over what had happened to you. As much as your father's searing glare burned in your mind, it was somehow not as hot as Daemon's gaze. You could do nothing but go between dread because your father and- and... affection because of your husband.
You rub your chest as you feel it tighten, thinking of your prince. You begin to fight your own breathing though, and sit up to calm yourself. You screw your eyes shut as you bring to mind things that calm you: swimming, Gwayne, Alicent, you-
Your eyes open when you hear the door swinging. You straighten up as Daemon walks over.
"Mmm," he chuckles, "did you wait because I asked?"
"I-" but your words are cut off by how the bed dips when he crawls over to you.
"I would prefer you with less clothing next time," he says, leaning into you, pressing a hand on your thigh.
Your heart quickens at his kisses. He smells and tastes of wine. He pushes your skirt up and comes down to kiss your knee.
You gasp when he pushes you back. And then you realize your breathing is heavy, but not strangling. You squeal when he kisses up your thigh, "D-Daemon-"
He gives you a warning look and mutters in a foreign tongue.
Suddenly, your smallclothes are being removed and your husband is sinking between your legs. You yelp, "D-Daemon, you're drunk!"
He holds you in place by your thighs. "No," he dismisses, "but I will be once you let me taste your cunt."
Your eyes widen and you immediately try to sit up.
All he has to do is lift your legs and speak your name for you to- "cease your needless wrangling," Daemon grunts, "you will quite enjoy this."
"P-pl-"
"You enjoyed my fingers did you not?"
Your mouth goes dry.
"Then you will more so enjoy my tongue, shaky thing. Quit trembling."
The strangled moan that is pulled out your throat is more confirmation than any word you could have ever told him.
By the time Daemon was satisfied playing with you, you were sticky and sweaty and naked lying next to him on your bed. You tense when he stands and you immediately cover your body with your blanket, "w-where are you going?"
"Mmm," he walks towards the drawer and pours himself a cup of wine, "to my bed."
You turn to your lap, unable to help the pinch you feel at the confession he does not see this as his bed.
You watch him as he grabs his clothing, then quickly stand, "let me-e help you!"
Wrapped in a blanket, you come to Daemon's side and help him get dressed. He lets you, slight amusement falling on his features as you so ardently assist him.
He allows you and stares at your glowing face, glowing because of how good he fucked you. The blanket rests heavy on your shoulders, but your neck is bare to him. He finds himself reaching out after you tie his breeches.
You still when he pushes the blanket off your shoulder. He tilts your head to the side to behold his work. You begin to breathe through your mouth when his thumb rubs over the new and previous purple marks he's put on you. You gasp when he makes the blanket fall to the floor. Instantly, a shiver creeps up your spine.
He rubs your sides and kneads your breasts. He's made such pretty marks all over your chest.
"Come to me tomorrow," he rubs his hands down your bare bum.
You whimper as he squeezes you there.
"I will be with my Gold Cloaks," he tilts his head, " I wish to parade my prize, so wear something pretty," he rubs your shoulders, "something that shows my good work."
Your lips tremble, from both the cold, night air and his words, "I do not think it-"
"It is not a question, wife."
Your skin breaks out in goosebumps.
He leaves after and you scramble to wrap yourself in your blanket.
The next morning, Erryk Cargyll assumes his station and knocks on your door to announce himself. When the door opens, he is pulled inside before he can speak.
"Good morn," you clasp your hands together as you look him up and down, "Erryk?"
He smiles softly and bows, "yes. Good morn, my princess."
You smile back and him and motion to yourself, "I must enquire your opinion as a man and not a knight sworn to serve me."
Erryk straightens up and nods, "very well."
You rub the cowl upon your shoulders and sigh, "what do you think of my attire?"
The man looks over your red dress and black cowl. He takes a moment to think of what might be out of the ordinary with it, but finds nothing, so he says, "it suits you very well, my lady."
You sigh at this and untie the bow of your cowl. You remove it, revealing your décolletage and his eyes widen at the sight of the marks on your skin. He clears his throat and looks away.
Your face falls and you cover your shoulders with your dark curls, "is it very tasteless?"
Erryk opens his mouth but he cannot form more than a stutter.
You shake your head, gripping your cowl tightly, "Daemon wishes to... parade his work."
The man's brows furrow and jaw clenches.
"Perhaps the cowl should stay on," you mutter, feeling your breath begin to shorten. You turn to the said object and feel your hands shake. You try to put it on, but it feels as heavy as a boulder.
He catches your cowl just before you drop it.
You release a deep, shaky breath, looking up at him with watery eyes, "will you help put it on, Erryk?"
A line forms between his brows as he nods. He takes your cowl then circles around you. He gathers your hair and places it upon your shoulders one side at a time. As he circles back to fix the piece, he feels your trembling but says nothing as he does the bow.
"What is a wife supposed to do?" you mutter, tears becoming too heavy to say in your eyes.
Erryk feels a pinch in his chest upon seeing your pink eyes. He feels rather helpless as he retorts, "I confess, I am unsure."
Your throat tightens. You rub your lips and shake your head, "forgive me. It is a cruel question to ask a kingsguard."
"Did you not say you ask this of me as a man?"
You fiddle with the ring on your finger.
"I do not imagine it oft, for I will never have one, but I imagine still, if I had a wife, she would wait on me and help me out of my armor once I return. She'd nurse me to health whenever I'm beaten. She'd trim my beard and braid my hair. She'd give me children as fair as she."
Your brows raise at his solemn words.
"And in return, I would honor her. I would worship her like the gods," he motions, "I would not allow harm, or shame to befall her, not if I could help it."
You chuckle at the way he says this. You shake your head, "you are man of honor. It is both a blessing and a curse that you are kingsguard."
You feel light headed.
Erryk hovers when you lean your face into a hand.
You barely turn to him as he takes your arm. You mutter, "this is what he requires of me."
His brows knit.
"That I be a conduit of his chaos," you gulp, "and in return... I will have my freedom."
"Freedom?" he leans his head forward.
You finally face him fully and shrug, "many a thing my father forbade me to do. I once believed he did it with love... now, I am not so sure."
The line between his brows only deepen.
"I should like to do most of what I could not before I die," you chuckle, as if it was a jest, to soften the mood. It does not work; it was not a jest.. You rub your chest and walk towards the door.
He guides you, but grows wary upon noticing how you lean your weight into the knob, "perhaps you should take a seat?"
You smile and shrug, "it matters little if I sit or not, Erryk."
You open the door and step out. He links your arm into his. You lean into him and sigh, "apologies-"
"There is nothing to-"
"-I have been calling you by your name."
He places his hand atop yours, "you may call me whatever you so desire."
"Mmm. You truly are quite like your twin," you lead down the hall, "you should do the same for me."
"Very well, princess."
"Hopefully not princess, and simply my name."
He shakes his head, "too late. You told me I could call you what I desire, and I desire to call you my princess."
"Except princess."
"Once more, too late."
"Hmp. You are less kinder than your twin."
His jaw drops, "you wound me so deeply, my princess."
"I am glad to hear it, Erryk."
"My princess is quite cruel."
"Relent, I beg."
You realize you unconsciously walked yourself to the training yard by the time you got there. You also realize then how famished you were. On cue, your stomach grumbles, making Erryk look to you in concern.
"Have you not broken fast, my princess?"
"I- no."
"Then why did you walk us here?"
You were about to explain that your body had a knack of going to the areas in which your brother frequented, but before you could speak, the said man was calling your name.
You instantly come alive at the sight of your twin walking over.
"Good morn, sister," Gwyane nods, "Cargyll." He looks at him for a moment, "I wager... Erryk?"
You gasp and chuckle, "how could you tell?'
Your twin turns to you, "mmm, it might have to do with the fact I passed Arryk, who was stationed at the gate today."
"Oh, bother," you swat Gwayne, "I thought you could tell them apart."
"I just did, simpleton," he raises a brow.
"No, you're the simpleton, you nincompoop."
"No, you're the nincompoop, you daft sod."
"No, you're the daft sod, you freakish dunderhead."
"No, you're the freakish dunderhead, you ratty ninnyhammer-'
"You dare speak to the princess this way?"
You all turn and see Daemon's severe expression. He steps between you and Erryk, imposing upon Gwayne.
You tense and take his forearm, "Daemon, tw-"
He silences you by raising a finger. He narrows his eyes at your brother, "I should have your tongue for that."
Your twin chuckles in disbelief, but whatever amusement he might have had instantly melts into irritation, "a jest, prince. You act as though you are not capable of doing the same to your older brother."
"There is a time and a place for jests, yet I doubt there is a time or a place to publicly slander the Princess of Dragonstone."
"Daemo-"
"Believe me, I would be the first to demand satisfaction to whomever dare slander my twin sister," Gwayne grits his teeth.
Your husband laughs loudly, "then perhaps you should go shove a-"
"Daemon, please," you quip, finally raising your voice enough that you could not be ignored.
Both Daemon and Gwayne turn to you. You grab the former's arm and undo the ties of your cowl, "my silly brother is not worth the headache he's about to give you."
Gwayne's jaw tightens as he looks at the face you pull as you look at Daemon.
"He's not, but I can-"
His mouth goes dry when you remove the cowl and hand it to Erryk. Daemon's eyes rove over your cleavage. The marks on your skin were more apparent than he remembered, but then again, he had only seen it in candle light.
"I... dressed so prettily for you," you mutter, pushing your hair back, "perhaps we should go for a stroll instead?"
Daemon's lilac gaze falls upon your pleading eyes. For a moment, he's so distracted he'd forgotten all about your brother, but when he remembers, he turns to him with a chuckle and grins, "yes, you're quite right, wife."
When you look at Gwayne and he immediately turns away from you. Your throat constricts because of it.
"A good stroll would do us good," Daemon turns to you, "then I will shall show you the might of my City Watch. Tis far more entertaining than whatever you could behold here."
With that, the prince leads you off, turning to Erryk as he did, "that is all, Cargyll. I have her now."
You watch as the kingsguard nods at the instruction, stepping back to let you pass. You look over your shoulder, finding Gwayne already looking at you. You give him a sorry expression before looking away.
#daemon fanfic#daemon targaryen x reader#daemon targaryen#daemon x reader#daemon targaryen fanfic#daemon smut#daemon targaryen smut#daemon fluff#daemon targaryen fluff#house of the dragon fanfic#house of the dragon smut#hotd fanfic#hotd smut#daemon angst#daemon targaryen angst#daemon#daemon targeryan#house of the dragon
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SUMMARY: people say suffering is what it means to be a shroud. you could not think more different.
WARNINGS: mentions of blood & self mutilation.
COMMENTS: PHEW THIS ONE WAS A DOOZY!!! idia stop being my muse pls 🙏🙏 i keep writing 2k - 3k word fics in one sitting because of you
“Don’t you wish the world treated him better?”
You blink, entranced by the swirls of green. The voice beckons you closer.
How was that door open...? It should have been closed, right...?
“Don’t you wish you three could live up on the surface, like everyone else?”
More voices have joined.
“Don’t you want that for him and his brother?”
It sounds beautiful, like a symphony.
“This is what it means to be a Shroud.”
You step closer, muscles relaxing as you slip under their spell. The voices are right. They deserved better. They should have been able to live where they pleased, to escape this island and their fate.
The voices giggle—they know they’re right.
They’ve reached you.
Black consumes your vision, blocking out the glowing green. You shut your eyes. Your world grows darker. There's a seizing in your chest and a fluttering in your heart as something pours into your body, staining you.
“This is what it means to be a Shroud.”
“Set us free, and we’ll set all of you free.”
—
The hallways are blaring red, but all Idia sees is the floor swimming in his vision. Ortho is by his side as he punches access code after access code into the door panels, running like he’s never run before. He has a stitch in his side but he keeps going, your face flashing in his mind.
He lost Ortho once. He’s not losing someone again.
It’s like the stairs last forever, winding deeper and deeper into the Earth. Idia doesn’t stop running once, even though he feels like he’s going to fall over and throw up. He’s almost one-hundred percent certain Ortho has carried him at some point but his mind is too messy and his vision is too muddled to care.
Time seems to slow as he reaches the bottom. He raises his head as his ears ring, and the second he lays eyes on you it’s like his vision is clear again. Ink pours out of you and the black markings on your face are all too familiar. Blue fire spits out from behind you and your shrieks are heartbreaking, like you’re wailing for something you want so badly but could never have. Wings sprout from your back, broken and crooked, feathers twisted and clumped. Your hands are worn and bloody from stretching at the walls, and that’s when Idia realizes—
You want to be free.
Guilt crashes over him and it's a critical hit. Of course. He should have been sure this is what you wanted. He should have known you’d get sick of life here, even though you said you loved him time and time again, even though you held him on all those nights that he couldn’t sleep because the thoughts were too much, even though you bonded with Ortho and stepped back for him, letting him set boundaries even though that meant not doing things you wanted to do, like holding his hand or kissing his forehead or playing with his hair.
He should have known this wasn’t the life you wanted.
The ring on his finger feels like nothing more than a heavy stone now.
—
It took years for Idia to open up to you about his family situation. In fact, he seemed to be braced for the possibility that you’d leave him in a heartbeat after hearing it. Your heart ached for him when he explained his past and his inevitable future in a soft, low voice, rushing through the whole thing as if it was the scariest thing he’s ever done.
You placed your hand on his knee once he stopped, letting his words trail off into the night.
“I understand you.” you’d said, looking him straight in the eyes. They seemed to glow in the darkness of his room, flickering like a fire about to be put out.
Idia curled in on himself that night, dragging a clump of his hair over his shoulder and twisting it into knots. You’d reached over and gently grabbed his hands, stopping him from tangling his precious hair. You’d gently smoothed out the fiery strands before kneeling in front of him, looking up at him as if paying him reverence.
“I want to stay with you.” you’d said softly, cradling his shaking, fragile hands in yours.
In that moment, it felt like his very heart was beating between your intertwined hands.
Soft sniffles filled the room that night, and you kissed each tear away. More kept coming, more and more and more, his eyes blotchy and red as he tried to keep quiet. You kept quiet too, whispering how much you cared about him and how if he would let you, you’d stay with him forever because you loved him and he deserved someone by his side. You kissed each tear well into the night, fighting his overwhelming sorrow with your love.
—
Your memories are patchy. It’s like you don’t remember who you are, or where you are. In the dark expanse of your mind, you remember two things.
Idia Shroud and Ortho Shroud.
Your throat feels heavy as your heart starts to palpate—what happened? Where is the green glow? Where are all the comforting voices that whispered your new future to you?
Where were the people you were fighting for?
“Vitals stable.” a faraway voice calls, a sharp clatter piercing through your quiet, inky haze, “Commencing full body scan for blot.”
Blot...
Your eyelids pry themselves open. All the energy has been sapped from your body, your limbs heavy and useless. The strings holding them up have been cut, and it's scary that you can’t remember how you were strung up in the first place.
“Mx, we ask that you please stay still.” the man above you is in a white coat, his hands holding a clipboard and a pen.
You nod passively. Something about him seems familiar enough.
His voice drones on statistics about your well being as your eyes slip shut again, and arms of sludge reach out from your mind and pull you back under the ink, into a deep sleep.
—
Idia is chewing on his fingernails again.
He wishes you were here to scold him for it and paint a new coat over them so he wouldn’t chew on them anymore, being too sentimental to mess up your hard work and too repulsed by the taste, even though he would only ever tell you the latter and—
You were still asleep.
Your vitals are stable, You are fine.
You are fine but there are still black scars all over your body.
Your vitals are stable but the marks will stay there forever.
You almost died and it’s his fault.
You want freedom and he took that away when he said “I do.”
He kissed you and he sucked the soul right out of your body, keeping it clutched in his hands because he’s selfish and stupid and why in the world did you even fall in love with him in the first place?
He has nothing to offer you.
Nothing but this.
Suffering and loneliness and contempt and headaches and cold nights and machines that fill your whole day, leaving no room for the whimsical leisure you enjoyed before. There are no more board games, no more trips to the school store, no more fresh air and nighttime walks, no more watching movies and eating gummy worms, no more talking to anyone who isn’t him.
The ring on his finger burns.
—
You don’t know how long it's been since you went to sleep.
You wake up to a room with dark walls and metallic shelves above your head. The bed (cot?) is firm underneath your body, which is adorned by a gray uniform. There’s a desk right across from you with a tablet and a chair. You can’t see anything it’s hooked up to. The one constant among all of these things seems to be the triangular details, criss-crossing and curving and connecting with each other.
They make your vision spin, so you look away.
You stay in bed.
For some reason your face and neck sting, as does your back. You trace the parts of your face that burn, finding that the areas are almost symmetrical on both sides.
What happened?
“...Idia?” you whisper, your left hand resting over your smoothly beating heart.
The door opens.
Your heart lurches into your throat when you see a dark uniform, fiery blue hair that swings well past his elbows, and eyes that are sunken in. His skin is as pale as ever, his lips chapped and bitten by worry, his nails stubbed and torn, but—
He came.
But it’s him.
He came when you called.
“...Idia—!” you gasp, choking on your words as you lurch forward and cough, black ink splattering all over your gray shirt.
“Easy!” he yelps, rushing to your side. You feel his cold hand press against your back and you lean into the touch, starved for it.
“What happened?” you ask between smaller coughs, following his hand and he lays you back down.
Idia bites his lip. He does not answer.
Instead, he turns his back to you and moves over to the desk grabbing the tablet. He still doesn’t look at you as he taps a few bottoms. He gnaws on his lower lip before twisting the chair to face you and sitting down.
“How much do you remember?” he counters your question with another question, eyes heavier than usual.
“I remember green.” you whisper, the intriguing whispers poking into the corners of your mind again, “I remember voices...they said sweet things to me.”
Idia winces as if that’s the last thing he wants to hear.
“You overblotted.” he says, so blunt it surprises both of you, “You went...deeper than you should have, and you overblotted.”
You touch your face. The burning sensation wiggles as if it’s been recognized, and is pleased. It’s like there's something under your skin, something alive and yearning,that was waiting for him to say it.
“Oh.” you whisper, and in turn, the voices begin to beckon you again.
“This is what it means to be a Shroud. Don’t you wish you three could live up on the surface, like everyone else? It’s not fair, is it? He deserves better. His brother deserves better. You all do. We can help you, we can make that happen, you just have to help us—”
“They were phantoms.” you breathe, tracing the lines on your face over and over and over and over and over—
You don't notice when he gets up and reaches for you. Idia grabs your hand when it looks like you’re pressing too hard, your nails digging into your skin. You stop immediately, looking up at him with glossy eyes and trembling lips.
“Idia...is this what it means to be a Shroud?” you ask, forming each word carefully.
The phantoms said as much.
But he says nothing.
“I don’t blame you if you decided this isn’t what you want, you know.” he says, tone flat and disinterested, like you’re someone he doesn’t even know.
“What do you mean?”
“Your phantom looked like it wanted to be free.” he says, tablet still in his hand.
He pulls up the footage of your rage and shows it to you—your crooked, clumped wings and your bloody, inky hands and your screams as you cry for freedom, freedom—
He misunderstands.
“Not for me!” you seize his wrist, squeezing it so hard you fear it’ll break but this important, “For you! Freedom for you! It’s always you and it always will be you! I wanted you to be free and Ortho to be free. I wanted all of us to be free—!”
You start coughing again, this time even harder. Ink splatters on your bed and this time Idia is on you, he’s truly with you, cradling you against his chest as the ink stains his uniform as well. It pours out of you like a dead, polluted river, and yet in a twisted way it’s a symbol of how much you care.
You vaguely feel his nose pressing against your head in the haze, whispering what sounds like swears and pleads but none of it reaches your ears over the sound of your coughing. By the time you’re done, both of you are thoroughly painted with the remnants of blot.
The voices are gone.
“I’m so glad you’re okay.” he whispers it into your head like it's a confession, meant for your ears and your ears only, “I thought you...wanted to leave here. Leave me.”
His arms are around you like a vice grip.
You’re grateful you’re alive to see him be selfish.
“Idia...my love.” you say, equally as soft, “How many times do I have to tell you that I want to be with you?”
“It’s hard to believe!” he protests, voice cracking.
He pulls away from you, just enough to look over your face. His eyes are watery and he’s so vulnerable—you really scared him. His thumb traces down the parts of your face that burned, the parts of your face you know will be scarred for life now.
“Good thing I’m still here then.” you smile weakly, cupping his face, “I’ll remind you every single day.”
His ring no longer burns.
His left hand rests over your left, and your rings clink together as they connect.
You’re okay. You still want him. You’re alive.
“You’re crazy.” Idia groans, stepping forward and falling into your arms, “You are absolutely crazy. Any normal person would be running for their life right now, calling me a freak and hyperventilating. A normal person would never want to come back—”
His slumps over you like a big cat, arms encircling you in warmth once again. It’s his way of hiding his expression when he’s getting a bit too into his feelings—you know this by now.
“Goodness. It’s a good thing I’m madly in love with you then.” you laugh, hands splayed out on his shoulder blades as he hugs you again, “You know what they say about love making you do crazy things.”
“Please don’t ever do that again—oh Great Seven.” he squeezes you even tighter and you let him, putty in his hands.
“I’m not planning on it. I promise.” you reassure him, “I don't want to leave you—”
“It’s not about leaving me, you could have died!” he protests, cradling the back of your head, “I’d be fine if you just left! If you were somewhere else...somewhere safe!”
“You would not be okay with that. Don’t pretend to be.” you chastise him quietly, and you know you’ve won when he goes quiet, “You want to keep me here, and you want me to stay. I want the same thing. You don’t have to pretend I’m a sacrifice that can be made. I didn’t fall in love with you because you’re noble or a goody-goody.”
He doesn’t say anything for a few moments. Then—
“I love you so much.” he mumbles.
It’s a rare confession, one that has never lost his sweetness even after years together.
Now this, this is what it means to be a Shroud.
It means staying with each other no matter what.
It couldn't be farther from loneliness.
“I love you too.” you murmur back, and his thumbs trace your blot scars as he presses a single, barely noticeable kiss to your forehead.
#auburn's fics <3#flops on the ground. guyss i NEED to stop doing all this in one session omg#i keep coughing WHY AM I STILL SICK#anyways married idia <333 my favorite version to write <333 muah muah#twst#twisted wonderland#disney twst#disney twisted wonderland#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#idia shroud#idia shroud x reader#idia shroud angst#idia x reader#idia angst
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