#phan teacher au
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phanfictioncatalogue · 8 months ago
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Teacher!Dan (2) Masterlist
part one
“A” For Effort (ao3) - Bananna
Summary: Dan and Phil were once high school love birds, but as soon as Phil heads to uni, everything is different. After drifting apart, and not talking for years, the two end up teaching at their old high school of all places. Inevitably, they find each other again, convinced the other has moved on. Through hours of grading, and bearing through crazy parents, they still find their thoughts filled with the other. A single night could change everything.
Are You Mine? (ao3) - phandomsub
Summary:Teaching was never Dan’s dream job. It’s just something he kind of stumbled into, but after working at Greenbrook Secondary for two years, he finds himself loving everything about it. Except for maybe the feelings he’s having for one of his students.
Boats Against the Current (ao3) - Emejig16
Summary: Dan is a literature teacher who loves his job more than anything in the world, but then things get a little difficult when his former high school boyfriend gets a job as the new media director, and well Dan isn’t exactly happy to see him again.
Detention (ao3) - omgdatphantho
Summary: Dan and Phil have sex during detention.
elusive (ao3) - quesalpha (ummonique)
Summary: teacher phil and teacher dan have a student who wants her ship to be cannon.
I’ll Be Around (ao3) - afraidofyounow
Summary: Phil Lester is a second year teacher at Fremont Secondary School. Daniel Howell is a new substitute about to take on a 8 month job at the same school.
A sweet story of two confused awkward teachers slowly establishing a relationship.
Let Me Dominate You - phanfictrashalex
Summary: Phil really likes his teacher, Mr. Howell, and he gets to dominate him.
Shakespeare And Coffee - dansphlevels
Summary: Teacher!Phan au where Dan Howell is the new Language and Composition teacher at the high school where Phil Lester teaches English to a bunch of public schooled kids who want nothing to do with it. Includes lots of very un-subtle flirting, a minor caffeine addiction, and a shared love for Shakespeare.
Teach Me How To Be Quiet - analester
Summary: smut where dnp are both teachers and dan gives phil a BJ under his desk during class.
The Kids Can’t Know (ao3) - awesomenessinwhite
Summary: Dan is a teacher, and everything is going quite well until a substitute with a dark past and a deep history comes into his life.
Today Was A Loud Day - completelyuncreative2
Summary: A Day in the life of Dan and Phil as teachers.
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thighguys · 2 months ago
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Phan Fic Recs #3!!
here is the requested long fic list! these are all 100k+, not all of them are finished (i didn't put any on here that aren't actively updating tho) and all of them are SO good so i hope you enjoy :)
Silver Arrows To The Heart by @evermorepeyton (137k WIP)- this one is a duplicate from the other list but there might be a few on here, ignore that<3 anyway this fic is AMAZING!!! dan and phil formula 1 drivers au- they're both on Mercedes and lots of awesome teammates to lovers hijinks ensue<3 this one gets a special shoutout for having some fantastic female characters (who are dare i say just as intriguing as dnp themselves?) and also bc the author is a beautiful human who i love<3 a super fun fic and very in character for both of them (somehow lmao, you wouldnt expect it with racecar drivers but somehow it works so well)
dancing on the blades (you set my heart on fire) by kishere (123k)- imagine all the 2009 phan lore but if dan and phil were figure skaters. yep, it's a yuri on ice au where dan scores a spot in the famous Lester training gym and meets phil, who is one of the most well known figure skaters in england<3 fantastic fantastic fic, such perfect vibes and lots of great lester family cameos<3
Strictly Come Dancing but make it GAY! by @natigail (176k)- the final duplicate from the medium list<3 this fic is AMAZING!!!! this is the one that got me back into phanfic in general afterhaving not read any for about 6 years, it's a strictly come dancing au where phil is a hot pro dancer and dan is a celebrity/gay activist, and they accidentally become the first gay couple to compete in scd<3 FANTASTIC outfit and dance descriptions, i listened to all the songs while reading it and it was honestly so lovely i felt like i could see it so clearly<3 also- the lore references are AMAZING lol i felt like a pro every time i found a little easter egg. amazing fic, i HIGHLY recommend it<3
A Semester Abroad by @everything-is-as-it-was (162k WIP)- this one is really fun!! lots of domestic phouse vibes as it is about an american college student who gets stranded in England after a study abroad housing situation falls through and who gets accidentally taken in by these two random british guys with a REALLY weird house... sooo funny, it's really quite cute and i highly recommend giving it a read! I love outsider pov and this has an abundance of funny moments because dnp are Weird
Broke, Gay and New in Town by @natigail (347k)- do you want the softest, cutest, most magical and compelling story to ever exist??? literally look no further because right here is the dan and phil stardew valley au and it is SO CUTE!!! dan inherits a farm from his grandfather and decides to ditch his boring life to go and run it, and he has so many adventures along the way. oh yeah phil is there too and hes SO CUTE and they fall in love :3 seriously so cute, also you don't need stardew valley knowledge to enjoy this it is independently perfect (i have never played the game and actually learned what it was From this fic so ur good lol)
linger on by dizzy, waveydnp (184k)- this one is so so so sweet... non youtuber au where 33yo phil has been living with his parents, but when his dad dies his mom decides to sell the house and phil has to find somewhere new to live. so ofc he becomes roommates with some guy called dan, and ummm they fall in love? honestly they are SO perfect in this fic, i adore it<3 highly recommend
L'Histoire Française by danfanciesphil (105k)- suuuuper fun teachers au! phil is a history professor and dan is his TA. this fic is SO FUN!!!! genuinely adore it lol, it's one of the first phan fics i ever read and it has stayed with me forever<3
So Many Stars by transdimensional_void (152k)- another teachers au :) dnp meet when they both become english teachers at a school in japan and this is VERY cute <3
okay there's the list!! sorry this one is shorter than the others haha, there are too few long fics in the phandom :( but all of these are so so lovely and i hope you enjoy! lol some distractions may be needed during these trying times <3
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niamh-writes-things · 3 months ago
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More phan aus that have been slowly accumulating in my brain. unfortunately i lost a bunch because my phone decided to spontaneously delete them all.
Phil is Dan's therapist, and over the course of many sessions, dan realizes he's in love with him. things get difficult when they figure out it's reciprocated because as his therapist, phil can't have an emotional connection with him, and also phil knows all of dan's trauma and dan can't stop thinking about the fact that he can't hide how broken he is from phil - "so now, i am going to go and tell this man about the fact that i've spent the last 10 years wanting to kill myself, while pretending i'm not deeply in love with him and that i don't want to kiss his on the mouth"
(this one is angsty, tw for bad mental health stuff) dan faints and phil thinks it's just his blood pressure thing. it's only when he tries to catch him and lift him to the couch that he realises just how light dan is, and that he seems far too skinny for it to be healthy. or, phil has a panic about losing dan and the fact that he might never be able to tell dan how much he loves him, and dan has been struggling for a while now.
English teacher phil and french teacher dan, inspired by the fact that i had a dream where phil was my english teacher. i imagine phil being rather eccentric, perhaps mr keating-esque
one where they're in a band and dan faints on stage, or the shenanigans they get upto, and introspection about how amazing it is that they got here, that they're performing on stage infront of thousands of people, and the fans keep theorising about them and taking photos of them making eye contact on stage, and dans the singer and phil plays guitar but he also does backing vocals so they do the thing where they share a mic and its all tense and 'are they gonna kiss rn???'
one is an artist of some kind and the other is their muse, people have been trying to figure out who this mystery man is these amazing photos/paintings/poems/ect. is, i imagine them living somewhere small by the coast or something and just cute stuff happening
dan has a school reunion to go to, and he's anxious as fuck, so phil offers to go with him. despite how worried he is about what people will say, dan agrees. people are probaby really weird about the fact that he's famous and they kind of look a bit shifty about the rumors that they're gay and in love. on a whim dan says 'yeah,he's my boyfriend' (phil is not his bf yet) and they both get a bit panicked because oh god why did he say that?!? but the night ends with dan stepping outside for some air and phil follows him out and they talk and dan gets a bit upset because of how hard it is to be back there due to everything that happened to him, and then it ends with them kissing and leaving early to have their own night in dan's hometown, so he can finally have good memories of the place.
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danfanciesphil · 7 years ago
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L’Histoire Française (New Chapter)
Teacher AU (Part 15)
(Part One)
(Part Two)
(Part Three)
(Part Four)
(Part Five)
(Part Six)
(Part Seven)
(Part Eight)
(Part Nine)
(Part Ten)
(Part Eleven)
(Part Twelve)
(Part Thirteen)
(Part Fourteen)
(Now Available on Ao3!)
It was foolish of Dan, really, to have ever believed that sneaking in to his own house would ever be a viable strategy. In fact, Dan only manages to turn his key in the lock before he hears a shriek from inside, and the sound of feet hurtling down the stairs.
The door is pulled open before he can get his hand around the knob, and he’s pulled inside with considerable force, into the arms of his drama queen of a flatmate. Teddy stands just behind Tyler, watching with a smile as Dan is squeezed within an inch of his life.
“How could you do this to us, Daniel?” Tyler is demanding, shaking Dan in his embrace. “We thought you were dead. You abandoned your dearest friends, your confidantes, all for a half-decent roll in the hay with some French floozie-”
“He’s not French,” Dan says into Tyler’s shoulder. “And-”
“No, I won’t hear it. Come into the lounge at once and tell me every last detail of what you’ve been doing since Sunday morning.”
Tyler releases Dan, only to grab him by the wrist and pull him towards the sitting room.
“Well I’m absolutely not going to tell you everything, so...”
Teddy slings a sympathetic arm around Dan’s shoulders, walking him over to the couch. “Don’t you think It’s best to spill the gory details now, Dan? You know as well as I do that he’ll only drag them out of you bit by bit anyway.”
Dan sighs, but allows Teddy and Tyler to pull him onto the sofa, fitting himself snugly between them.
“So, how many rumbles in the sack have there been thus far?” Tyler asks, diving straight into the deep end. “Twenty? Thirty?”
Dan splutters. “What? Don’t be ridiculous.”
“More?” Teddy asks, eyebrows lifting in genuine surprise.
“Gosh, and he’s a bit older, isn’t he? Kudos, Sexy Teacher,” Tyler says, exchanging an impressed glance with Teddy.
“Oh, for- we have not had sex thirty times!” Dan exclaims, already feeling drained by this conversation. “Why do you even want to know that, you pervs?”
“Because we need to have a deep, in-depth, analytical break down of each one, so that we can properly assess this man’s attributes and decide whether he’s good enough for you.”
Dan stares at Tyler in bewilderment. “You never wanted to analyse my sexual escapades with Stephanie.”
Immediately, both Teddy and Tyler pull a face. “Don’t be vulgar, Daniel.”
“Tyler doesn’t care for all that heterosexual stuff,” Teddy explains, laughing. “But you have to admit this is exciting. Your first gay experience.”
“We feel like proud fathers,” Tyler sighs, leaning his head on Dan’s shoulders. “Now tell your daddies, Dan. Exactly how big-”
“Alright, that’s the end of this conversation,” Dan declares, standing up from his seat. “It’s eleven o’clock and I have,” Dan takes a deep breath in, grimacing. “A potentially horrible, long day at work tomorrow.”
“You have?” Tyler asks.
“What’s the issue?” Teddy asks.
“Oh, nothing really,” Dan says vaguely. “Me and Phil could lose our jobs, that’s all.”
“Phil and I,” Teddy corrects. Then, he seems to realise what Dan just said. “Wait, lose your jobs?!”
“Is that what all this drama and weeping has been about?” Tyler asks, mouth agape. “Dan, what-”
“It’s fine,” Dan says with a morose shrug. He honestly hasn’t the strength to think about this anymore. Apart from a few
 minor interruptions, this job stuff has been all that he and Phil have spoken about today. “There’s a school policy against teacher relationships. But we’ve decided that that isn’t a good enough reason to be apart.” Dan shrugs. “So that’s good. But
 it does mean one or both of us could lose our jobs, yeah.”
“What kind of ridiculous, dated school policy are you working under?” Tyler scoffs. “Can’t you protest this?”
“We have,” Dan says, shifting from foot to foot. “They said they’d consider our appeal. Well, Phil’s appeal. Tomorrow is the decision date.”
“Oh, darling,” Tyler says, standing to wrap his arms around Dan. “I had no idea. You must be going mad with worry.”
“Can I do anything to help?” Teddy asks, unusually sweet. He stands too, joining in the hug. It’s a little awkward, being on the inside of a Teddy-Tyler sandwich, but Dan is nothing if not used to it by now. “Maybe a cup of tea?”
“Good idea, Teds,” Tyler stage whispers over Dan’s head. “Break out the camomile.”
Dan laughs, a little sadly, but rather enjoying all the attention. “It’s okay guys, I just wanna go to bed.”
“Alright, then.” Tyler and Teddy break apart. Dan doesn’t miss the worried glance they exchange. “Bonne nuit, my love.”
“Try not to think about it too much, I know what you’re like.”
Dan nods at Teddy, managing a grim smile, and then heads towards his room. He can feel the two pairs of eyes following him, but he ignores them, trying to be as convincingly composed as possible, so they don’t worry.
As he gets ready for bed, Dan replays the last few hours he had with Phil before he was dropped home. A perfect, idyllic stretch of time, over far too soon. They’d just been talking, lounging on Phil’s bed, drinking tea and munching on leftover madeleines. In the comedown of the incredible sex they’d had earlier, they’d both fallen into a soppy, sweet mood, so there was a lot of cuddling, and more than a few sickening confessions of adoration.
“I have a crush on your dimples,” Phil had told him, conjuring them out of Dan’s cheeks instantly. 
Dan had laughed and blushed, but Phil had kissed them until it wasn’t funny anymore, it was just true, lovely, and sweet.
Dan gets into bed, his heart heavy. How is he supposed to be able to sleep, knowing that tomorrow holds the possibility of Phil being torn away from him? He supposes it’s not as dramatic as all that, and that no matter what the outcome of the school’s decision, Phil has assured him that they’ll still be together. But the thought of working without Phil in that school, where the teachers treat him like a servant boy, and the kids - barely five years below him in age - seem to giggle as he walks past them in the halls
 it’s unpleasant, to say the least.
Phil brings life to that building. Without him it would be a regular, dull and colourless establishment, devoid of any distinguishing features, or palpable enjoyment for learning. Phil’s presence leaks out of that one classroom in which he teaches, and streams through the halls, infecting the students’ minds. He ignites inspiration in their curious young brains, elicits a genuine passion from them for the subjects he feels so strongly about.  
Rolling onto his side, Dan reaches for his phone, charging on his bedside table, and clicks Phil’s name.
Dan I’m very lucky I met you.
He rolls onto his back again, sighing at the ceiling. He means that, no matter what else may happen.
His phone buzzes, making him smile, and he reaches for it in the dark. His pillows still echo with the faint smell of Phil’s cologne, and it’s giddying.
Phil I think it was more like fate.
Dan Sap. <3
Phil You started it <3
Dan laughs, then puts his phone back on the table to his left. He’s just thinking about all the sleep he’s going to lose out on, when his door cracks open, and two familiar faces peer through into the gloom.
“Dan?”
“Are you still awake, darling?”
He tries to be annoyed, but he can’t fight the smile that inches onto his face. He sits up a little, cocking an eyebrow at his two flatmates. “What do you want?”
Having received confirmation of Dan’s consciousness, the door swings open, and Teddy and Tyler bowl through, jogging over and leaping onto Dan’s bed. Teddy at least has the decency to close the door behind himself.
“Hey, woah, what’re you- guys, I need to get some sleep-”
“Shh, love,” Tyler says, snuggling himself against Dan’s side. He wiggles underneath the duvet, as does Teddy, and they sling their arms across Dan’s middle, getting comfy. “We just thought you could use some company.”
“In case you start overthinking,” Teddy explains, yawning into Dan’s ear. “Just forget we’re here. Enjoy the cuddles.”
“I don’t mind if you pretend I’m Phil, but please refrain from grinding on me too much,” Tyler says. “Teddy gets awfully jealous about that kind of thing.”
Teddy aims a kick in Tyler’s direction, but catches Dan in the shin instead. “Ow!” Dan exclaims. “Guys. I’m touched, really, but I can’t actually move-”
“Good, because if you move I will end up on the floor,” Teddy interrupts. “Everyone just stay where they are.”
Dan sighs heavily, surrendering. Again, a traitorous smile creeps onto his face. Sure, these two might be an enormous pain in the backside most of the time, but he wouldn’t trade them, even so.
“Thanks, guys,” Dan mumbles.
Strangely, this bonkers plan of theirs seems to be working. Dan is distracted enough by the lack of movement available in his limbs that he feels sleepier already.
He shuts his eyes, focusing on the warmth of the arms criss-crossed over his stomach, the rise and fall of the chests on either side of him.
“You have washed these sheets since Phil slept over, right?” Tyler says into Dan’s ear.
“I haven’t been here, Ty,” Dan mutters back. “How could I have?”
“So we’re sleeping in all your sin?” Teddy asks.
“How kinky.”
Dan swats Tyler in the side. “Don’t say ‘kinky’ while you’re in my bed. That’s a forbidden word in this scenario.”
“How did Phil react, by the way?” Teddy asks, suspiciously casual.
“To what?”
“To seeing you in your fursuit?”
The next few minutes are packed with Teddy’s indignant shrieks as he finds himself on the floor, followed by his pleas to be let back into the bed. Dan doesn’t relent for a good few minutes. Out of principle. 
*
At break time, they’re scheduled to meet with the Principal of the school. Dan has never been to the Principal’s office. He has, in fact, never even met the man, though he’s heard an array of wild, conflicting stories - mostly from the students - about why he’s never around.
The most popular theory, particularly amongst the older students, is that the Principal is an undercover spy, using his position as head of the school as both a front, and as leverage to infiltrate a corrupt government, particularly in the department of education.
According to Phil, these rumours are perfectly viable. He’s an eccentric character, apparently, and difficult to read. Phil likes him, which says a lot to Dan, as he trusts Phil’s opinion far more than anyone else’s.
“Do you like him more than John?”
Phil frowns, deliberating over this question. “Difficult to say. I don’t know him as well as John.” Phil frowns, deep in thought. “I’ve been round to his house for a board game night before, actually. He’s a quirky character, kind of peculiar, but he’s definitely nice. Just a little bit intimidating, I guess.”
That conversation had taken place before the first bell, in Phil’s classroom. Dan has no lessons with Phil on Tuesdays, so he has to simply wait until break time to see him again.
They meet outside the Principal’s office, both surprised and unsurprised to find Jonah Frank and Matthew waiting on opposite ends of a bench outside it, their arms folded. Matthew has a black eye; Jonah has a bleeding knuckle.
“Jonah, Matthew,” Phil greets them, a smirk on his lips. “Been playfighting again?”
“Nothing playful about it, sir,” Matthew scoffs, scowling at Jonah. “He just suckered me out of nowhere.”
“Out of nowhere?” Dan asks, also fighting a smile. “Well, that’s peculiar behaviour, Jonah.”
Jonah smirks, shaking his head at Dan’s sarcasm. “He was mouthin’ off. He deserved it, and he knows it.”
Matthew rolls his eyes. “Since when am I not allowed to say what I want? It’s a free country.”
“Since what you say is purely stirrin’ up shit that doesn’t concern you,” Jonah says, his tone firm.
“You’re so damn sensitive ‘bout Lester and the new TA,” Matthew growls, his voice quieter, though not so quiet that Dan can’t hear. “How ‘bout you crawl out their asses for a sec and-”
“Alright, alright,” Phil says in his loud, authoritative tone. It makes Dan shudder a little, a reminder of the past few times he’s heard it, but Matthew and Jonah are too busy staring daggers at one another to notice, thank Heavens. “Let’s take a breather. Silence is golden, for now. We can let the Principal deal with your disagreement.”
“Is that why you’re here, sirs?” Jonah asks, forgetting Matthew. “To see the Principal?”
“We have a meeting with him, yes.”
Jonah nods, his brow creasing. “Cool. Let me know
” he casts a wary look at Matthew. “How it goes.”
“See you later on, boys,” Phil says, tactfully avoiding agreeing to Jonah’s request.
With that, Phil walks up to the door of the office and knocks thrice. Dan smooths out his shirt and straightens his tie, already so nervous he could pass out. He let Tyler pick out his outfit this morning; he wanted to look smart, professional.
As it turns out, this probably won’t matter very much, as Phil has chosen to wear a bright blue shirt covered in corgis, and a bowtie. It’s ridiculous, but somehow he pulls it off beautifully.
“Come in,” a voice calls from inside.
Phil glances at Dan, giving him a little smile. Dan sends one back, very glad that he doesn’t have to do this alone, at least.
“Good luck, sirs,” Jonah calls as Phil pushes the door open, and steps back to let Dan inside.
*
The Principal’s office is cream-coloured, and the large windows look out onto the parking lot. It’s on the second floor, so there’s a bird’s-eye view of the area where the school buses idle, along with the main entrance, out of which the students pour every day. Dan imagines it must be rather nice to see them all funnel through the doors after the last bell, safe in the knowledge that they’ve all made it, unscathed, through another school day under your supervision. 
There’s a persistent, barely comprehensible jabbering coming from the backwards-facing chair behind the large desk. The Principal seems to be speaking on the phone. Following Phil’s lead, Dan takes a seat in one of the large beanbags provided, and waits, flicking nervous little glances in Phil’s direction.
He takes the opportunity to look around the room, curious about this mysterious figurehead that he’s been working for all this time. There are a few plants in here - strange, exotic ones that looks as if they shouldn’t be able to survive in England, but that are thriving, somehow, in this office.
The walls hold some bizarre motivational posters, and a few paintings that follow a similar, abstract and colourful style. Dan peers at the name in the corner, but he can’t quite make out the squiggle. It looks something like ‘Linguini’.
Phil clears his throat, clearly getting impatient. Dan hears the Principal say something like, “ah, yes, well - got to run for now, we’ll catch up on the candy cane dilemma a little later.”
Understandably, this makes Dan’s brow crease in confusion.
“Yes, alrighty, TTFN, Nick.”
The chair swivels, rather dramatically, and the receiver is placed back in its holster. A young man sits in the Principal’s chair, a dazzling, white, straight-teeth smile on his face, framed by a shock of dark curls atop his head. His eyes are bright and blue - though a different shade to Phil’s entirely. He also, Dan notices, wears glasses.
It had been enough of a shock for Dan to accept the existence of Phil Lester, a rare beauty amongst the rather beaten-down teachers he’s known in his life, but for there to be two members of this school’s faculty that look like they could be modelling their own range of designer spectacles is a bit much to comprehend.
“Ah, hello, hello!” The man declares brightly, standing briefly from his chair. “Phil! So good to see you!” Phil rises from his beanbag, a little awkwardly, and grips the hand outstretched over the desk. It takes Dan a moment, but then he struggles up to do the same. “And Dan, is it? Mr Howell, sorry, I’m being awfully rude.”
“Dan’s fine,” Dan mutters, his stomach still churning.
“Excellent! I’m Principal Ligouri, but most of the staff call me PJ.”
Dan nods, managing a grim smile. He flops back down onto his beanbag, as does Phil, and Principal Ligouri takes his seat, straightening his thin, black tie.
“I’m ashamed of the fact it’s taken so long for us to meet, Dan!” PJ says, his voice loud and ringing with exuberance. If Dan had thought Phil was a large personality, he has nothing on PJ; this guy could fill twenty rooms with his sunny smile alone. Honestly, it’s a little much. “I usually make it a point to get to know my staff members.” He pretends to slap his own hand. “Shame on me!”
“Oh, it’s fine,” Dan assures him, the beanbag rustling as he fidgets. “I know you’re very busy.”
“No excuses!” PJ exclaims, ruffling his mop of hair in both hands. “Any-who, any-why, what brings you two here today? Ooh! And would you like a slurp of tea?”
PJ produces three mugs out of a seemingly invisible drawer in the desk, and deposits them on the table. Then, he spins around on the chair, wheeling over to a little tea-station behind him, which holds a kettle, a teapot, and a very tiny fridge.
All three of the mugs have the word ‘slurp’ written on them, alongside a colourful array of peculiar drawings. They look very similar to the framed paintings on the walls, Dan notes.
“Um,” Dan says, glancing at Phil, unsure. “I- I guess tea would be nice-”
“Peej, I think Dan and I would prefer just to get this over with,” Phil interrupts. 
PJ swivels on the chair to face him again, eyes wide. The kettle starts to roar.
“Get it over with?”
“Yeah,” Phil says, frowning. “This is a disciplinary meeting, after all.”
PJ slumps in his chair, frowning back at Phil. “I’m afraid you’ve lost me, Phil.”
“This meeting
 you’re supposed to be telling me and Dan whether we’re allowed to stay on here.” Phil looks across at Dan, as if checking to see this is correct. Dan shrugs very slightly, just as bewildered as he is. “Because we don’t plan on breaking up, so
”
A second or two passes, and then PJ’s face melts into a relieved smile. “Oh, that? I thought I told John to clear all that nonsense up.”
Dan and Phil gawk at him in surprise, able only to watch in perplexed silence as PJ, humming away, turns back to his tea station to pour the water into the pot.
“Sorry,” Dan says, shaking his head. “I don’t think we understand. We thought we were here to receive the board’s decision about whether Phil will be having to quit or not.”
PJ barks a laugh, swivelling back towards them, teapot in hand. He looks practically maniacal, Dan thinks, holding the teapot in the air as he uses his long, spidery legs to scoot back over to the desk. Like the Mad Hatter, somehow having risen through the ranks until he’s in charge of an entire school.
Dan looks over at Phil, mildly fearful of this thought. Perhaps PJ is a lunatic? Could it be that his lack of presence in this job has caused his staff to overlook his mental instability? Could this man have simply forgotten what this meeting is all about?
“Principal Ligouri,” Dan says, heart hammering. “This isn’t very funny to us - it’s actually caused us quite a lot of anxiety, so if you could just explain-”
“Right, Dan, of course.” PJ’s face drops into one of total sincerity so fast that Dan actually leans back into his beanbag, blown away. The teapot is placed carefully on the desk, the mugs pushed to the side. PJ leans towards them, fingers laced, a grim, apologetic smile on his handsome face. “And that is, of course, something that I am deeply apologetic about.”
PJ clears his throat, and pours the tea into the mugs, still the picture of seriousness.
“We will, of course, be providing appropriate compensation for the both of you in regards to all this-”
“Wait, wait, slow down.” Phil is sitting upright as much as he can in the beanbag, looking irritated. Dan watches him in silent awe, knowing that whatever is about to come out of his mouth is undoubtedly going to be deliciously firm and righteous. “PJ,” Phil sighs in frustration. “Am I correct in understanding that neither Dan nor I are about to be forced to leave our jobs?”
“Good grief, I wouldn’t hear of it!”
Phil’s mouth sets into a line. Dan can feel the bubble of something begin to inflate in his chest. It feels like it could blossom into relief, or possibly euphoria, but it’s too early to tell.
“And why, exactly,” Phil asks; his teeth sound like they’re gritted. “Have we been under the opposite impression for the last twenty-four hours?”
“So John didn’t catch you up to speed?” PJ asks; Dan and Phil both shake their heads. “I see,” PJ says. 
He turns to get the milk from the fridge and pours some into the mugs before speaking again. 
“Well, I’ll have a word with him about that. But let’s just suffice to say that the matter has been put to rest. There’s no need to concern yourselves with it anymore. You’re free to see one another romantically - though I would remind you to keep things professional during school hours, of course.” PJ grins, reaching for his mug of tea. “Well, as far as possible. Young love, and all that. I’m not a monster.”
“
I don’t understand,” Dan says quietly. “How can this all just be over? John said-”
“Yes, I am aware that John miscommunicated to you both,” PJ says, slurping down some tea. Mostly because Dan is very aware that his hands are empty and twitching with nerves, he reaches for one of the mugs PJ made him, hands it to Phil, and then reaches for the other. “I do wish to offer my sincere apologies for that. The thing is
 John’s always been a bit of a stickler for the rules. I myself haven’t glanced at that ancient handbook for years. I’ve no idea why he wouldn’t think to ask me about the validity of those old guidelines before speaking to you.”
“So, the no teacher-relationships rule is just
 being thrown out?” Phil asks, his big hands wrapped around the mug.
Dan slurps some tea of his own, eyes wide. This whole meeting has been so far from what he expected that he’s starting to wonder if he’s actually dreaming. The tea burns on his tongue as he sips it, and he winces in pain.
Probably not a dream, then.
“I’ll have to call a meeting and file some paperwork before I can officially abolish it,” PJ says, rolling his eyes as if the very idea is deathly boring. “But I already appealed to the board of education and they have no objections. Apparently most schools got rid of those no-teacher-relationship rules yonks ago.”
“It does seem
 kind of old-fashioned,” Dan says, his voice small. 
The bubble in his chest is expanding, pushing up into his throat. He’s worried that it might pop, bursting out of him in a bout of hysterical laughter.
“Oh, it’s practically Edwardian,” PJ agrees. “What kind of evil troll-Principal would I be if I allowed my best teacher - and my best Teaching Assistant,” PJ winks at Dan, slurping some more tea. “To be forced out of here simply because they fell in love?”
Dan immediately flushes bright red, and he determinedly avoids Phil’s eye. Love is not something they’ve discussed yet. PJ, caught up in his own tale, seems not to notice.
“It’s actually all very romantic. Like a modern day fairytale. Dan’s the damoiseau in distress, Phil’s the brave Knight
 who’s the evil dragon? Me, perhaps? John?” PJ stares out of the window, lost in his own musings. “Anyway, enough of that. Time for the happily ever after, I say!”
As PJ rambles on a little more, Dan just stares into his tea, unable to believe this is actually happening. He and Phil seem to be off the hook, completely. No more crying in the secret bathroom, no more sneaking around, guiltily hiding things from John and the kids. They get to be together, every day, without restrictions. Dan gets to walk past Phil’s classroom and see him, bright and vivacious, inspiring the students, whenever he wants.
And then later, after he’s finished work, Dan gets to wind their hands together, he gets to watch Phil pack away his desk and kiss him before he turns out the lights. He gets to listen to the kids tease them for being so sappy, climb into Phil’s little car, and be driven home.  
Belatedly, Dan feels a hand place itself into his, and he glances down at it, realising it’s Phil’s. He squeezes tightly, dumbstruck that he’s allowed.
“...so of course the compensation you’ll receive for this will be enough to satisfactorily put this absurd matter to rest once and for-”
“Compensation?” Dan looks up in surprise.
PJ nods slowly. “Yes
 as I mentioned, you’ll both be offered a sum of money to compensate for the inconvenience.”
“How much?”
Phil lets out a small laugh at Dan’s question, making him blush. PJ’s mouth also twitches in amusement. Dan shrinks away from their responses; he’s never been offered so much as a tax reimbursement, let alone money for something he now finds out he hasn’t even done wrong. He can’t help but be a little eager to know the details - particularly as he’s currently scraping by on his meagre Teaching Assistant salary.
“The details will need to be finalised, but I will personally see to it that you are not disappointed,” PJ tells the two of them. He drains the last of his tea from the mug, letting out an ‘ahhh’ of satisfaction.
“PJ
” Phil says, looking almost as shocked by all of this as Dan is. “This is
 I want to thank you for being so understanding. You could have- well, let’s just say if you were a different sort of person, this might not have gone as smoothly for us.”
“Oh, now, don’t be silly,” PJ says, batting his gratitude straight out of the air. “All I ask for is a wedding invitation, and a dedicated plaque in your forever home, attributing the success of your relationship to me, and me alone.”
Dan gawps at him, mouth falling open a little. Then PJ splutters, sending a hideous flush over Dan’s neck and face. Phil titters beside him, squeezing Dan’s hand.
“Oh, and one other thing,” PJ announces, glancing at the clock on the wall. Break time is almost over. “I received a rather lengthy email this morning from a Mr Jonah Frank. I presume he is a student of yours, Mr Lester?”
“Oh, God,” Dan says under his breath.
They’re so close now. Dan prays silently that whatever Jonah said - or more likely threatened - won’t ruin it for them at the last minute.
“He’s in mine and Dan’s Year Nine History class, yes,” Phil says, glancing at Dan, wary.
“I see,” PJ mutters, clicking on something on his computer. “Ah yes, here it is.”
“Peej, whatever he said, he’s just a
 kind of troubled kid who has a favouritism for me, he’s honestly harmless-”
PJ glances up, eyebrows nestled near the mass of curls atop his forehead. “I think you’re misunderstanding me. Jonah sent through a very polite and honestly rather well-put together request for a - and I’m using his words - ‘reconsideration of my decision to suspend two members of the faculty’.”
Dan blinks in quiet shock, unable to summon a response.
“He did?” Phil asks, sounding just as baffled.
PJ nods, then turns his monitor for the two of them to see. On the screen is an email, professionally structured, with separate, indented paragraphs, and a ‘Dear’ at the beginning, along with a ‘yours sincerely’ at the end.
It could be any business email Dan’s ever seen, except for the telltale name at the bottom - Jonah Frank.
“A ‘petition’,” Phil reads, adjusting his glasses and squinting at the words. “What’s that about a petition?”
“Ah, yes,” PJ says with a wry smile. “Apparently this delightful young man took it upon himself to create a petition for the two of you to remain on the staff. He gathered over two hundred signatures, actually, it’s rather impressive. He seems to have emailed it to the whole school, though I’m not sure how he managed to find the email addresses of all the teachers.”
Probably not through legitimate means, Dan thinks to himself. “Two hundred people signed it?”
PJ nods brightly at them both. “It seems the two of you are rather popular. Of course, the petition turned out to be unnecessary, but had I been the sort of tyrant that would have sacked you both over this triviality, I do believe this petition of Jonah’s might have made me reconsider.”
“I feel like
 I should mention that Jonah is waiting outside right now,” Phil says, smirking slightly. “He was sent to you for giving another student a black eye.”
PJ’s eyebrows lift, and he disguises what looks very much like a small chuckle as a cough into his fist. “I see. Well, in light of all this
 perhaps you could mention to him on your way out that I’m
 very busy. Too busy, in fact, to see him, and that he is free to go.”
“Got it,” Phil replies, smiling at PJ. “On that note, we should probably get out of your hair.”
Phil stands up then, and Dan follows suit, still in a daze. They’re really going to walk out of here scot free.
Phil reaches over to shake PJ’s hand, smiling warmly. When PJ reaches for Dan’s hand, he limply gives it up, still unsure of protocol.
“Lovely to see you Phil, as ever,” PJ says with a grin. “When’s our next board game night? We should set a date for it.” A light blush peppers his cheeks, and he glances at Dan. “With Dan too, of course. How rude of me.”
“Oh, um, thanks.”
“I mean it! I take Tokaido very seriously, Dan.”
Phil nods gravely. “It’s true.”
“Don’t worry, I’m a bit of a Mario Kart menace
 so I know the feeling.”
Phil eyes him curiously, his smile practically screaming at Dan how much he wants to see this in action.
On their way out of the door, Dan hesitates, his eye catching once more on those paintings. He steps over to read the scribbled name at the bottom. Up close, it’s just about readable: Ligouri.
“Oh, so you did paint these,” Dan comments, smiling as he takes in the bright, beautiful shapes and colours. “They’re wonderful.”
“Well, thank you very much,” PJ tells him, walking over to where the paintings hang. “I’m only an amateur, mind. But I do love to experiment with acrylics in my spare time.”
“I prefer charcoal,” Dan says, not really thinking about it. He’s too caught up in the vivid monster-scape in front of him. “Or pencil.”
“Oh, you draw?” PJ turns to him in surprise. “Funny you should mention, I’ve been looking for someone to teach an after school art class once or twice a week. Would that interest you? Extra pay, obviously.”
Dan’s eyes widen in astonishment. “Really? I mean- wow, that sounds-”
PJ’s telephone trills into life then, cutting Dan off mid-sentence. PJ rolls his eyes and heads towards it. “Do excuse me, I need to take this, I imagine. People do get awfully worked up if they can’t get hold of the Principal. Send me an email to remind me about the art class, though. Lord knows I’ll only forget otherwise.”
Dan nods, and PJ gives a small wave, picking up the receiver. 
“Ah, Nick! Calling back about the candy canes? Red and white. No, no, black would not be a good substitute-” 
His head spinning with ideas of striding after-hours through a classroom full of easels, ten or more eager faces turned to him, hanging on his word, Dan strolls out of the office through the door Phil is holding for him, and smiles.
*
There’s barely a second for Dan to catch his breath once the door shuts behind him before he’s being swept into Phil’s arms, and kissed, so hard it’s rather dizzying. He feels the bubble in his chest burst at last, sending tumbles of relieved, ecstatic laughter into Phil’s mouth. He hugs Phil fiercely, clinging to him tight.
Phil doesn’t stop, doesn’t let him breathe, he just kisses and kisses, lifting Dan a little off the floor as he holds tight around his middle.
“Uhhh, I’m guessin’ that went well then, sirs,” a voice sounds from nearby; Phil springs backwards, releasing Dan in a second, his cheeks an unusual shade of peony.
Jonah, still sat on the bench outside the office, is staring at determinedly at the floor, his eyes wide and horrified. Dan lifts a hand to his mouth; it’s been less than a minute into their new, public relationship and he and Phil have already traumatised a student.
“Jonah!” Phil exclaims, hurriedly wiping his mouth and smoothing his shirt down. “Um, sorry, I- we didn’t see you. Um, yes, it went
 better than expected.”
Jonah looks up cautiously, as though he’s expecting a pornagraphic display. He sighs, relieved, when he finds this is not the case, and grins at his teacher.
“Awesome, so you’re stayin’ on, an’ that?”
“It would appear so, yes.”
Dan smiles at Phil, giddy with happiness as this is confirmed aloud for the first time. “Apparently a particularly determined student helped us out in that department.”
Phil laughs, nodding. “Yes, we
 wanted to tell you how much we appreciate your effort to help, Jonah. It’s very sweet of you to get so involved, and to do what you did.”
The fourteen-year-old shrugs dismissively, but there’s a little smile gracing the corners of his mouth. “S’nothin’. Couldn’t be arsed with the idea of comin’ to this shitshow school every day without messin’ with you two dorks.”
“I’m not sure I should allow you to speak to us like that,” Phil says. lifting one eyebrow. “But... I think, on balance, I can probably let it slide this time.”
Jonah grins, winking at Phil. “Thanks, sir.”
“Oh, and Principal Ligouri wanted us to pass on a message to you,” Dan adds, glancing at Phil; his eyes widen, remembering. “He says that he’s sorry, but he’s awfully busy and can’t squeeze you in, so if you promise not to hit anyone else, you’re free to-”
“Hey, speaking of, where is Matthew?” Phil asks, looking around the vicinity.
“I finished ‘im off,” Jonah says casually, standing from the bench. “Stuffed him in those lockers over there.”
Jonah inclines his head to a nearby row of lockers; Dan’s eyes widen in alarm. “You
 are you serious?”
There’s a moment of strained silence, wherein Dan wonders if he’s about to become world-famous as the Teaching Assistant that allowed a raging psychopath of a student to murder a classmate in cold blood and stuff his corpse into a locker. Then, Jonah laughs.
“Course I’m not serious, sir, fuckin’ hell.”
“Language, Jonah,” Phil warns, but he’s laughing too. Dan glares at them both, and rolls his eyes.
“I told ‘im I’d take the rap for the punch and sent him off,” Jonah says, grabbing his backpack, still laughing. “But looks like I don’t need to now, thanks to you, Mr Lester.” Jonah winks, already backing down the corridor. “See you losers next Monday!”
At that second, the bell rings, and Dan looks exasperatedly at Phil. They exchange a look of frustration, knowing that they’re now going to have to wait until lunchtime to talk about this.
“See you later,” Dan says, sighing. He darts forward to steal one last kiss from Phil’s mouth just before the corridor fills with students, on their way to class.
“Come find me in Classroom Nine at lunch!” Phil calls as Dan hurries away with the mob of teenagers.
He rolls his eyes at this instruction; as if he’d go anywhere else.
*
Fifteen minutes after the lunch bell, Dan is sitting on Phil’s desk, Phil on the chair in front of it, his chin on Dan’s knee. Dan is gazing down at him fondly, his heart bursting at the seams. He gets to stare at this face every day. It feels too good to be true.
“My mind is still reeling,” Phil admits. “This morning I practiced my ‘I quit’ speech to Buffy.”
Dan smirks. “And what did she think?”
“She gave some helpful comments.” Phil laughs. “Maintain eye contact, square my shoulders, pee on the desk to mark my territory
”
Dan nods seriously. “Well, she is a highly trained professional.”
“Oh, of course. That’s why I went to her for advice, obviously,” Phil says, smiling. 
His eyes are crinkling in the corners - Dan has come to recognise that this happens when he’s feeling particularly fond. 
Dan is just about to ask Phil to feed him more of the cookie he’d bought from the canteen a little while ago, but at that moment there’s a knock on the closed classroom door. It opens in the next moment, before either of them have a chance to respond.
It’s John, surprisingly, that pokes his head around the door. There’s no mistaking the bashful expression smeared all over his face. “Is this a bad time?”
Phil lifts his head from Dan’s lap, sitting back in his chair. “No, you’re fine.”
Instinctually, Dan feels his hands curling into fists at the sight of John. It’s not fair, Dan knows, to be angry with the man, as he was only doing his job - but still, he is the reason Dan and Phil have been having such a difficult time recently. And to top it off, it was all totally unneccessary.
“I thought I should stop by to apologise to the two of you,” John says at once, stepping just inside the door. Dan’s fists unfurl at once. “If I’m not mistaken, I’ve made a rather large error in regards to how I dealt with the discovery of your romantic relationship, and that must have caused both of you a great deal of stress.”
Dan frowns, studying the whorls in the wood of Phil’s desk.
“Thank you,” Phil says, making Dan glance up. “We appreciate you saying that, John.”
“Y-yes, we do,” Dan agrees, nodding.
John’s shoulders sag in relief. “Good, because it really was never my intention to
 disrupt this, um, blossoming relationship. In truth, I find you both very good company, and I’m happy you found each other this way.”
“I understand, John,” Phil tells him with a kind smile. Dan marvels at his ability to be so forgiving; he’s not sure he can do it so quickly. “You thought it was part of your job. It’s okay.”
John nods sadly, looking guilty, still. “I understand that this might affect our friendship from here on out, but I hope that perhaps with time you might come to forgive me-”
“Don’t be silly,” Phil interrupts, waving a hand through the air. “Let’s just put it all behind us. Peej said something about organising another board game night soon. You remember last time, don’t you? Should be fun to see PJ hurling Monopoly hotels into our drinks again.”
John laughs at this, apparently remembering. Dan’s eyes widen a little, not sure how to react to the information that PJ apparently gets violently competitive on these occasions.
“Sounds good,” John agrees, smiling gratefully at Phil. “If we can ever pin the mystery-man down, I’m in. And I suppose we have one more player to add?” John eyes Dan questioningly.
Dan nods, giving him a somewhat thin smile. Sue him, he’s not as much of an angel as Phil Lester. He can be salty about John’s actions for a little bit longer.
“Excellent,” John mumbles, turning to go. “Well, I apologise again. I hope you’ll be very happy together. And I know you’ll be professional about this, of course.”
The last bit is said as a mild warning, but Phil just chuckles, nodding. “Thanks, John. See you around.”
*
The next few days are a blissful, barely believable dream. Dan swans into school each morning and has a coffee made for him by his perfect boyfriend. They spend their break times laughing at stupid memes on their phones and planning fun activities for the classes they run together. 
Of course, the kids tease them mercilessly. They make kissing noises when their backs are turned and ask them inappropriate questions at every opportunity. They make Dan blush so hard that by the end of the lesson he often feels light-headed.
But it doesn’t matter in the slightest, because Phil is incredible at laughing it off, or swatting the jibes back at the kids with his effortlessly sharp wit.
“I’ve lost the board eraser,” Phil says one time to the Year Eight class. “Has anyone seen it?”
“Did you check Mr Howell’s pants, sir? Perhaps you dropped the eraser when you were in there earlier,” Shaima says, her eyes twinkling with mischief.
Dan immediately splutters into his hand, scandalised - she’s only thirteen!
“Thank you, Shaima,” Phil answers, one eyebrow raised in warning. “I’m not sure it would be entirely appropriate to reach into my TA’s pants right now, but perhaps I’ll check later.”
Shaima pulls a face at this, which seems to have been Phil’s desired effect, if his responding smirk is anything to go by. 
“In the meantime, perhaps you could spend a little less time trying to embarrass your teachers, and a instead focus on the relationships of the Tudor family.” Phil says with a harder tone. Shaima nods, a little guilty. “Don’t worry, their lives were far more sordid and gossip-worthy back then than mine and Mr Howell’s boring plans to cuddle on my sofa later and watch Adventure Time.”
Dan is incredibly happy. Despite wanting much the opposite, Dan resists the urge to go round Phil’s house after school for the remainder of the week. He feels a little like he might be straining Phil’s hospitality, and that he’s just too polite to say.
Besides, Teddy and Tyler have been insufferable in their complaints about him not spending any time with them anymore. To rectify this, he reluctantly agrees to a house night out to the pub on Friday, just the three of them.
Unfortunately, they run into their friends down at The Cat & Bear, including Stephanie, who is her usual glowery self. This time however, it doesn’t bother Dan in the same way. He spends much of the evening texting Phil as he nurses his single pint of beer. Teddy and Tyler drink more than enough for him, anyway.
Before she leaves, Stephanie snaps her fingers in front of Dan’s face, looking annoyed. “Hey, rude much? You’ve been staring at your phone all evening, Dan. What, are we not entertaining enough for you tonight?”
“Oh, we have to let him off, Steph,” Teddy says, thankfully, before Dan can scrounge up a response. Teddy slings an arm around Dan’s shoulder. “He’s found a new squeeze.”
“Ooh, let me tell Phil we say hi!” Tyler exclaims, making grabby hands for Dan’s phone; luckily, being more or less sober, Dan manages to whip it out of his reach.
“I got it,” Dan assures him, tapping out a quick text to this effect.
“Um, Phil?” Stephanie repeats, her voice shrill and high. “As in
 Philip? A boy?”
“Oh, gosh honey no,” Tyler says, placing a condescending hand on her forearm. “Phil Lester is a man.”
Dan can’t help the splutter that comes out of his mouth; Stephanie just purses her lips, stands up and excuses herself from the table. Dan doesn’t see her again for the rest of the night.
“I always got the sense she might’ve been a bit homophobic,” Tyler says, wrinkling his nose. “Not overtly, but I could tell what she thought about us. Living in sin, as we are.”
“Yeah she told me bisexuality wasn’t real when I came out to her,” Dan shrugs, making the others blink in surprise. “I don’t actually think she’s a very nice person, come to think of it.”
His phone buzzes, and Tyler grabs hold of it at once.
“Ty, no! Give it back,” Dan cries, leaning over Teddy’s lap in an attempt to grab it.
Tyler just laughs, holding it out of reach. He clicks the text message that came through.
“From Phil - tell Tweedledum and Tweedledee I say hi back,” Tyler reads, then sucks in a scandalised gasp. “Wow, Phil. That is just uncalled for.”
Dan sniggers behind his hand, privately appreciating that joke.
“If we are any characters from Alice in Wonderland we are the Queen of Hearts and the... big dragon-y thing,” Teddy says, sounding indignant.
“Oh, yes, Helena Bonham Carter slays,” Tyler agrees. “I could totally see myself as her.”
Teddy places a hand on Tyler’s arm. “Oh, honey no, I meant you’d be the Jabberwocky.”
“As if I’d-”
The phone buzzes a second time, and Dan lunges for it, but misses. Tyler’s reflexes are surprisingly fast considering his level of inebriation.
“Phil again,” Tyler announces, gleeful. “He says, ‘glad you’re having fun, chaton, but i miss you and
’” Tyler’s eyes bulge, and he lets out a shocked little laugh. “Oh my. Well, that’s a little more risquĂ© than I’d expect from a secondary school teacher.”
“Oh my God, give me my phone back,” Dan says, mortified. “I hate you so much.”
“What does it say?” Teddy asks eagerly, his eyes shining. Tyler tilts the phone for him to see, and Teddy descends into a fit of laughter. “Oh wow, you are one lucky boy, Daniel.”
“And he’s indulging your furry kink I see, chaton,” Tyler adds, laughing.
This time, when Dan snatches for the phone, he manages to get ahold of it. He reads the message Phil sent him, flushing deeply, and pockets his phone again. He tries to ignore the laughter from the others, but ultimately can’t stand it.
“That’s it, I’m getting pissed,” Dan declares, standing to head for the bar.
*
Phil r u ok? u havent texted back for a while
Dan yesh
Dan am drunk tho
Dan fdl;’’;f,;
Dan sory spelling is hard
Phil lol i thought you were only gonna have one beer?
Dan me too
Dan cant b sober around T & T
Phil i understand
Phil are u alright? are you still at the pub?
Dan no im in bed now
Dan wish u were here
Dan bed is waaaaay better with u
Phil haha i completely agree
Dan stpehanie was at the pub >:(
Dan she was mean and rude
Dan Teddy told her bout u and she was rly jel
Dan cos ur so awesome and hot
Phil hahahahaha. oh god. i hope Teddy described me a bit better than that.
Dan she stormed off it was gr8
Dan Tyler read out tht dirty message u sent me
Phil omg hahahaha
Phil i would say im sorry but its just hilarious
Dan h8 u
Dan miss u tho
Dan come here i want to be cuddled
Dan 
 or we could do those things u said in ur text
Dan not fussed
Phil wish i was there tbh
Phil get some sleep cheri xxx
Phil i’ll see you very soon <3
Dan sighhhh. kk. night night <3
Phil xxx
*
When Dan wakes up on Saturday morning, his head is pounding and he can taste nothing but an ashy, bitter residue coating his dry tongue. He groans into his pillow, trying to will himself back into the comforting embrace of unconsciousness.
He’s there, face buried in the pillow, for around ten minutes, when all of a sudden his door creaks open.
“Ugh, Tyler, Teddy, get out, it is entirely your fault that I currently feel like death,” Dan groans at the general room. “I do not feel like a chinwag right now.”
“Shame,” a voice decidedly not belonging to either of his flatmates, says from afar. “Guess I’ll just leave then.”
Dan turns around so fast that the room lurches, and he swallows a wash of bile threatening to spill out of his mouth. Phil lurks by the door, a large pizza box under one arm, smiling at him.
“Are you a mirage?” Dan asks him, uncomprehending. “How- who let you in?”
“A very grumpy looking Teddy,” Phil replies, sauntering over to the bed. “I tried to ask him how he was feeling but he just sort of grunted at me and shooed me towards your room.”
Phil places the pizza box down on Dan’s bedside table, shucks off his shoes and jacket, and crawls under the covers beside him. He scoops Dan into his arms, pulling him against his chest, making him sigh. This could be Heaven, Dan thinks. He smells vaguely of pizza, and he’s warm and soft.
“How’re you feeling?”
Phil presses a gentle kiss to the top of his head. Dan just groans in response, shaking his head to and fro.
Phil chuckles. “Too hungover for pizza and cuddles?”
“Never,” Dan replies immediately, tilting his face up to be kissed. Shockingly, Phil does kiss him, despite the fact Dan is sure he looks absolutely dreadful - not to mention the taste of his sour breath. “You’re too good to be true.”
Phil smiles warmly, and kisses him again. “True. I’m an amazing boyfriend. Now sit up and eat your pizza.”
The next few hours are spent in a wonderful, indulgent cocoon of bed, Netflix, pizza and lazy, sloppy making out. They get crumbs in Dan’s sheets, and their eyes begin to hurt from how many episodes of Buffy they get through, but it’s perfect in every way. Dan can’t remember a Saturday he’s enjoyed more than this for a long time.
“Have you thought about what you might do with your compensation payout yet?” Phil asks, nibbling on a leftover piece of pizza crust.
Dan sighs, remembering it. They were paid yesterday, a reasonable sum just as PJ promised, but Dan has a whole mountain-load of debts trailing after him, so he can’t enjoy it for long. It will be nice to take some of the pressure off his financial status, though.
“Oh, rent, student loan repayments, bills
 the choice is simply overwhelming.”
Phil laughs sympathetically, snaking an arm around his shoulders. “Sorry, gorgeous.”
“What about you?” Dan asks, genuinely curious. He hadn’t really considered until now what Phil might want to invest in.
“Oh, I’ve spent mine,” Phil tells him.
Dan blinks. “Already?”
“Yep,” Phil replies with a smile. “I bought some tickets.”
“Wow,” Dan says. “Expensive tickets. What for?”
“Yeah, well. The Eurostar is expensive. Especially if you travel first class.”
Hungover and throbbing as it is, Dan’s brain takes a little while to catch up. “The Eurostar? Where are you going?”
“Paris,” Phil says, smirking. There’s a knowing glisten in his eye; Dan watches it with suspicion. “And not just me. You too.”
“What?”
“I booked us a weekend in Paris,” Phil says, grinning. “Not yet. For Valentine’s Day. I know it’s a couple of months away, but I thought it’s best to think ahead because I know I’ll want to spoil you, and-”
Dan leaps on him, their mouths connecting with such force that he thinks it’ll probably bruise them both, but he doesn’t care. He peppers Phil’s face with kisses, his face creasing with embarrassed laughter. Dan whispers his exclamations of utter, ecstatic joy, telling Phil he’s amazing and perfect and that Dan is, quite literally, the luckiest person in the entire universe.
“Dan, Dan, it’s okay, I mean it’s not that big of a- oh, shit, o-kay-”
He stops his protestation in favour of gasping out a few more curse words then, mostly because Dan’s hand is currently inserting itself into the front of his pants.
Things accelerate rather quickly after that. Their clothes can’t be removed fast enough, and Phil seems particularly handsy today, which doesn’t help. To his credit, he works swiftly with the lube, locating it without being prompted in Dan’s bedside drawer, and working Dan open on his fingers with the practiced efficiency of a skilled artist.
Dan, for his part, just moans and gasps, clinging onto Phil in numerous ways, hands twisting into his hair, or skimming over his bare back, down to his hip so he can trace the faint bump of his tattoo.
As Phil pushes into him, Dan feels his body splitting apart, exploding into the billions of stars that scatter across the galaxy. He feels the rough, hot drag of Phil against his internal muscles, pressed in so deeply, so tightly, that it feels almost impossible to believe.
He hears his name on Phil’s lips as he comes, followed by the warm, pleasant rush of liquid shooting into his body, making his heart stutter. Phil’s hand gets him the rest of the way, along with the never-ending kisses pressed to his lips and neck.
When it’s over, and they’re laying, breathless and spent, on the mattress, Dan shuts his eyes, and sends a silent prayer. He’s not a religious person, but he feels he needs to cement this moment.
“What’re you muttering?” Phil asks.
“Just praying to Jesus, or Allah, or Buddha, or whoever else is up there that you never, ever leave me, and that I can stay this happy, with you, forever.”
“Dan,” Phil says, sounding a little choked. “That’s
 Of course I won’t leave you. I
” he pauses, chewing his lip, conflicted. “I won’t leave you.”
As he decides what he wants to say, Dan’s heart speeds into overdrive. Butterflies, moths, dragonflies... they all burst into sudden, vivacious life in his pizza-filled stomach. He rolls onto his side to face Phil.
“I’ve been learning some more French,” Dan tells him slowly.
His heart is practically humming. He reaches for Phil’s hand and laces their fingers together.
“You have?” Phil asks, clearly unsure. “What have you learnt?”
Dan quirks a smile, then broadens it, knowing of Phil’s penchance for his dimple. Sure enough, Phil’s gaze falls to the place on his cheek that Dan knows it to be, a look of fondness passing over his expression.
Dan leans forwards, so their mouths brush, just slightly. “Je t’aime.”
The reaction is instant. Phil stops breathing, Dan is sure of it. His chest stops inflating beneath Dan’s hands, and Dan can no longer feel the soft puffs of air against his mouth. Phil leans away just a little, enough that he can focus on Dan without going cross-eyed.
“Dan, do you
 do you know what you just-”
“Oui,” Dan says. “Je t’aime, Phil.”
There’s a tremor in Phil’s lower lip, and his eyes glisten. Alarmed, Dan wonders if perhaps it’s too much, too soon, and he should never have-
Then Phil kisses him, hard and full of emotion, hands bracing his head. Dan falls into it happily, not surprised to feel the slight damp of Phil’s cheek, but a little more so to discover the ripple of goosebumps up and down the warm skin of his arms.
“I love you too, Dan,” Phil says against his mouth, smiling. “I love you very much. It feels a bit like I always have.”
A relieved, exalted grin pushes the dimples back into Dan’s cheeks, and he wraps himself in Phil once again, bathing in the sunlight of those glossy, shimmering words.
Paris, Dan muses as the tangy, sweet, familiar flavour of Phil’s essence floods his tastebuds, isn’t necessarily a place. Paris can be found in the tunnelling, azure eyes of your favourite person. It can be discovered lurking, vivacious and dazzling, beneath the wide, strong caress of a lover in the dead of night. It is, for Dan, a feeling, an emotion, a state of mind. It’s the glow of his heart when Phil smiles across the classroom. It’s the vibration of his soft hum as he bakes in his pretty kitchen. 
Paris, in Dan’s mind, is a low, rumbling surety of Phil’s love and adoration. It’s a reminder, every passing second, every breath Dan takes, that true love is a best friend, a partner, a home.
Fin.
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phantasticworks · 3 years ago
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One of the Few Things - Chapter 2
hello! back again! this took way longer than i thought it would (thanks writer's block) but here it is! I'm working on a couple of other things atm as well so updates for this will continue to be pretty slow but I hope you guys are enjoying this one so far!!
read on ao3
Words: 4.3k
Summary: Dan finally has cause to meet Willow's dad.
Warnings: none
The next couple of weeks are hectic. Every new school year comes with that awkward settling stage for the first couple of weeks, but this time it feels even more nerve-wracking now that Dan’s own son is experiencing this side of things for the first time. Last year was different, reception was practically just daycare in Dan’s eyes. But this year? This year, his son walks in the big kid halls every day and Dan is quite honestly terrified for him.
“Are you sure you don’t want me to walk you to class? Just once? I could meet your new friends!” Dan is practically begging at this point, and if he had any pride left he’d probably feel embarrassed about that. Luckily, he didn’t.
Jack groans, covering his face with his little hands. They were already almost to the school, less than ten minutes away, and Dan had been exhausting the conversation pretty much the whole car ride. “Daddy,” Jack starts, taking a deep breath before continuing. “I love you very much but you’re really bothering me very much today, also.”
Dan tries not to laugh, but an amused noise escapes anyway. “Sorry, bub. I just want to be there to support you if you need me,” he explains gently. And while some part of him is just pressing the issue because it’s funny to see Jack riled up, the bigger part of him feels this ache in his chest at how quickly his baby boy is growing up.
“I know, Daddy. But I’m five now, I need to be a big kid, like Willow.”
Dan has to actively try not to cry when he hears that. “Okay, buddy,” he says, his voice cracking. He clears his throat, and avoids looking into the rear view mirror, terrified that his son will catch him crying. “I’m proud of you for wanting to be so independent,” he tells him.
“Thanks, Daddy,” Jack says, though Dan suspects he doesn’t even know what “independent” means.
They arrive at the school, which is a welcome distraction from Dan’s spiraling thoughts about the steady march of time and how horrible it feels to watch his son’s childhood slipping away. “Here we are,” he announces, pointlessly, as Jack is already unbuckling his seatbelt. He’s in such a hurry these days, but luckily, Dan had put childlock on the doors years ago, so he didn’t have to worry about any little accidents happening.
“Are you gonna let me have a hug when we get inside?” Dan asks, helping Jack out of the car. Lately, he’s been picky about when he’ll let Dan hug him in front of his peers and when he won’t, and Dan hasn’t been able to work out the difference yet.
“Guess so,” Jack says with a shrug. He reaches up for Dan’s hand as they walk, and Dan squeezes it, pleased when Jack squeezes back, the way he used to when he was tiny.
“You don’t have to,” Dan tells him quietly. “It’s always your choice, of course.”
Jack smiles up at him, patting his hand. “I know, Daddy.”
Dan smiles right back at him, holding the door open so they can go inside and find Willow. She’s not hard to spot, since she’s taken to waiting close to the front door every morning for Jack to get there.
“Hey!” Willow says with a wave, smiling brightly at both of them. “Good morning, Mr. Howell.”
“Morning, Willow,” Dan says, returning her smile. He lets go of Jack’s hand, allowing him to move freely, but he’s very pleased when Jack turns to him, holding his arms out for a hug. Leaning down, Dan wraps him up in a warm embrace, kissing the top of his curly head. “Love you, Jack. Have fun at school today, learn something new.”
Jack pats Dan’s back, and it’s such an oddly adult gesture that Dan almost laughs. “Love you, too, Daddy. I’ll see you later.”
It’s a quick hug, and as soon as Jack says this, he’s pulling away, reaching for Willow’s hand with a smile. Dan can’t help but grin fondly at them, waving as they start off down the hall. “Bye, you two! Willow, I’ll see you later in class, yeah?”
Willow turns to nod at him, waving one last time. “Yep, see you then!” she calls as they disappear around the corner.
Dan sighs heavily. Who knew letting your kids grow up and find their independence would be this draining? He thought the hard part was supposed to be when they needed you for everything.
He didn’t realize it would get harder when they didn’t need you for anything.
~~~
Dan’s grading some papers during his planning period late in the afternoon when he notices it. He hadn’t really been paying attention to the names at the top of the papers as he went through them, but the tone of this particular journal slows him down, makes his eyes flicker to the top of the paper to see who could’ve written something so beautifully morbid.
Willow Lester.
He shouldn’t even be surprised at this rate, honestly. Call it whatever; fate, divine intervention, coincidence - anyway, it seems that Willow is meant to be a standout figure in his life right now.
He rereads the line that had struck him once again, considering it carefully.
“But the sun will shine wherever it wants, even in the reaper’s garden.”
The journal assignment had been to write about a time that they were uplifted by something or someone, and Willow’s was somehow more real and depressing than any of peers’ had managed to be. He doesn’t know whether to be concerned or just impressed, but as his eyes flicker back over the journal, taking in the almost poetic way Willow describes visiting a cemetery, he decides that concern is probably the proper response.
He writes himself a quick reminder to set up a meeting with Willow’s parents, or at least a phone call, before setting her paper off to the side and continuing his grading.
~~~
Naturally, Dan forgets about the journal and the necessary phone call home until a couple days later when he has Willow in his class again. He curses himself for forgetting about it, especially when he had left himself a note, but there’s not much he can do about it for now. He forces himself to get through his class just like normal, going through the motions he does every other day. But that note, and Willow’s journal, weigh heavily on his mind throughout the entirety of his class.
By the end, he’s nearly shaking. Several years into teaching and he honestly would’ve thought he’d be over that kind of anxiety by now, but maybe it’ll never really go away. Besides, he hates making tough parent contacts at the best of times, and although it’s not like he expects this one to be that terrible, his personal rule is to always talk to the student first and tell them he’s going to talk to their parents. And in this case, that scares him.
Not that Willow is scary or anything. She’s probably the least-threatening child in any of his classes, but he dreads the idea that confronting this with her will destroy the rapport and relationship they’re building, and he can’t afford that this early in the school year. He just has to take a leap of faith and hope for the best.
“Willow, could you hang back for a second, please?” Dan asks once he’s dismissed his other students, who are already chattering loudly as they filter out of the room.
Willow has a nervous look on her face as she trudges up to his desk, stopping at the corner and looking at him curiously. “Yes, sir?”
Dan gestures to some of the desks. “I don’t have a class next period, so we can sit and chat for a second,” he says, grabbing her journal off his desk as he goes to join her.
She slides into a desk quietly, watching him warily as he does the same. He struggles to fit his long legs under one of the desks and she nearly smiles, but seems to catch herself before she can. “Am I in trouble?” she asks, fidgeting with her hands nervously.
“No, of course not,” Dan assures her. “I just wanted to talk to you about the journal you turned in a few days ago.”
Willow looks confused at first, then a slow understanding dawns on her face. “You read those?” she asks, almost on a whisper.
Dan nods. “I do. And firstly, I wanted to say how impressed I am by your writing. You have an incredible vocabulary and your writing flows beautifully. Really, really great job on this,” he says.
Willow smiles. “Thank you,” she says, looking relieved. “Is that all? Can I-“
Dan holds a hand out when she starts to leave. “Not yet,” he says apologetically. “While your writing style and word choice is fantastic, I did want to chat about the content for a minute, if you don’t mind.”
Like a flip has been switched, Willow deflates, staring down at the desk with a dejected look. “Okay,” she says softly.
Dan’s heart is breaking already. “Your journal was a bit darker than your peers’ journals were, but I’m more concerned about the truth behind it. Is this something we need to talk about with the counselor? I don’t want to be too nosy, and you don’t have to answer any of these questions, but I want to help you if I can.”
Willow is quiet for so long that Dan think she won’t say anything at all. And when she does, his heart sinks. “It’s not. It’s just a made-up story. I didn’t know what else to write about, so I made something up,” she says.
Dan would believe her if she’d make eye contact with him.
“Are you sure?” Dan asks gently. “If this is something you’d like to talk about, I’m always ready to listen,” he says.
Willow shakes her head. “No, thank you.” She shifts then, reaching for her bag. “Can I go now?”
Dan sighs, but nods. “Yes. Let me write you a note.”
He scribbles her a note to inform her next teacher where she has been, but right before she steps out into the hall, Dan calls her name.
“Yes?” Willow says, turning around expectantly.
Dan gives her an apologetic look. “I know you said this is something you don’t need to talk about, but I believe it’s something your parents should be aware of. I’ll be contacting them shortly to set up a meeting, and I just wanted you to know beforehand,” he says, trying to be as gentle as possible.
All the color has rushed out of Willow’s face, but she nods. “I understand,” she says, her voice stale and monotone. “Bye, Mr. Howell, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
The door closes loud and heavy behind her, and Dan hopes once more that he hasn’t ruined the rapport they’ve built so far this year.
~~~
The phone is on the third ring when someone finally answers.
“Hullo?” A deep voice greets him.
“Er, hi,” Dan fumbles. He glances at the phone number on his computer, the only number listed for the parents of Willow Lester. He’d been expecting her mum, honestly, since it was only just after school hours, and he knew her dad was a teacher as well, and now he’s a bit discombobulated.
“Hi,” the deep voice parrots in amusement when Dan doesn’t immediately respond.
“Oh, um- I’m so sorry, I-” he pauses, taking a deep breath. “My apologies, I suppose I should have cleared my head a bit before making this call,” he says, cursing himself silently at how stupid he sounds. Even Jack looks up from the corner of the classroom, giving Dan a sympathetic look.
“It’s quite alright,” the man replies. “To what do I owe the pleasure of this phone call, Mister
”
Dan wants to punch himself in the neck. God, he’s stupid.
“Howell. Daniel Howell, from the primary school,” Dan replies quickly.
“Oh. Mr. Howell as in
”
“I’m Willow’s English teacher this year, sir,” Dan supplies, in case Mr. Lester had been thinking of another Mr. Howell.
“I see. I have a student with the same surname, I don’t suppose you happen to have a son called Jack, do you?” Mr. Lester almost sounds amused, now, as if Dan’s fumbling is funny.
Dan hesitates, considering that was not the nature of their call at all, but he responds easily enough. “Yes, I do, actually. I suppose I should have introduced myself sooner, but this time of the year is so busy, you know.”
“I understand,” Mr. Lester replies. “Pleased to meet you, Mr. Howell,” he says kindly. “But if you aren’t calling to introduce yourself as a parent of one of my students
”
Dan sympathizes with the man’s wariness. It’s never pleasant to get a call from a parent, but even less comfortable is possibly an unforeseen call from your child’s teacher. He decides to just rip the bandage off. “Well, I was actually calling to introduce myself as the teacher of your child, and to see if we could set up an in-person chat about your daughter’s work.”
The other end of the line is dead silent for long enough that Dan pulls the phone back to make sure the call hadn’t dropped. Before he can panic too much, the other man speaks again. “Of course. Would tomorrow afternoon, right after school, be alright?”
“Er- sure, that should be fine,” Dan agrees. “Um, your daughter usually walks my son back to my classroom at the end of the day, so maybe she could show you the way?”
“Sure,” Mr. Lester replies. “Well, I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon, Mr. Howell.”
“Right. I look forward to it,” Dan replies. They exchange goodbyes before hanging up, and then Dan slumps forward, thumping his head against his desk.
“Good job, Daddy,” Jack says from across the room.
“Thanks,” Dan mumbles against the papers crumpled under his face.
He hears little footsteps, and then feels Jack pushing at his chair, making room to crawl to sit on Dan’s lap. “Was that Willow’s daddy?” he asks, observant as ever.
Dan sighs, sitting back and staring at his son’s curious little face. He can’t lie to those little brown eyes, he never can. “Yes,” he says. “It was Mr. Lester.”
“Why were you talking to him?” Jack asks, tugging on a string on his sleeve and avoiding eye contact. “Am I in trouble?”
Dan laughs quietly at that. “No, bubba, you’re not. I just need to talk to Mr. Lester about Willow, is all.”
“Oh,” Jack says. “So
 is Willow in trouble?” he asks, which of course shouldn’t surprise Dan.
“No, she’s not,” Dan says, ruffling Jack’s mop of curly hair. “Enough nosiness, mister. Are you about ready to go home?”
Jack nods, climbing off Dan’s lap with a little reluctance. “Can we go to Sainsbury’s on the way home and get some snacks?”
Dan sighs as he packs up the papers on his desk, but nods, helpless to such a simple request. “Sure, bub.”
~~~
The next day passes slowly, but somehow all of it blurs together as Dan frets over the meeting with Mr. Lester scheduled for that afternoon. Willow doesn’t have his class for another week, so he can only wonder about how it will go, worrying about whether or not Willow has told her father about her writing, or if perhaps he’s just worried and confused about the reason behind this meeting.
Dan selfishly hopes it’s the ladder, that way he isn’t the odd one out for being slightly worried and paranoid.
At the end of the day, Dan is setting his classroom back to normal like he does every afternoon when he hears voices in the hallway, one of which distinctly sounds like his son. He smiles absently, but finishes erasing some notes from the whiteboard, writing tomorrow’s date in the corner, along with the objectives for tomorrow’s lesson. He’s still writing when he hears his son call out, “Daddy!”
Dan turns around with a smile, placing the marker back in the tray and holding his arms out for the hug that Jack willingly throws himself into. “Hi, bubba. Missed you today,” Dan says, kissing his head. “Did you have a good day?”
Jack nods and wriggles out of Dan’s grip, turning and grabbing Willow’s arm from where she’s stood hesitantly at the door, a tall man behind her. “I had so much fun today,” Jack says, rambling as he drags Willow to the back corner where he plays every day when Dan has to work late after school. “We colored and learned a new song and I got to trade my cheese for a cookie at lunch!”
“That’s great, Little Bear!” Dan says, turning to the man he assumes is Willow’s father and mouthing an apology. “I want you to tell me all the details later, okay? Daddy’s gotta talk to Mr. Lester for just a few minutes, so you guys just hang out and play in here, alright?”
“M’kay,” Jack agrees carelessly, already moving on to interrogating Willow about her least favorite Pokemon.
Dan takes a breath, almost exhausted already just from listening to Jack talk so much. He turns to Mr. Lester, gesturing to the hallway subtly. The other man nods, stepping just outside the door. Dan follows after grabbing a paper off his desk, pulling his classroom door gently closed behind him.
Mr. Lester looks at him expectantly.
“Hi,” Dan says dumbly, holding his hand out for a polite handshake.
“Hi,” Mr. Lester parrots with a smile, accepting Dan’s hand and giving it a firm squeeze. “I assume you’re the Mr. Howell I’ve been hearing so much about?”
Dan flushes with that comment, but nods. They’re still holding hands. “All good things, I hope.”
Mr. Lester grins. “Of course,” he says. He glances down at their hands, and Dan startles, tugging his hand away in the most socially-awkward way that he’s probably capable of.
“So,” Dan starts, clearing his throat. “Mr. Lester, I noticed-”
“Phil,” Mr. Lester interrupts.
Dan blinks at him. “Pardon?” he says dumbly.
Mr. Lester smiles, like Dan being an idiot is funny, endearing even. “You can call me Phil. I don’t really feel old enough to be a Mr. Lester, honestly.”
Dan nods slowly. He turns the name over in his mind a couple times, cataloging the odd curve of his nose and his prominent Adam’s apple, ultimately coming to the conclusion that Phil fits him quite well. “Right,” Dan says awkwardly. “Well, Mr. Le- Phil-” he corrects when the man quirks a brow. “I just wanted to address some of Willow's work, as I’m a little concerned about her.”
Mr. Lester nods, but his eyebrows are furrowed like he’s confused. “Okay
 Do you mind if I
” He holds a hand out for the paper, and Dan nods, handing it over easily.
“Firstly, I have to commend your daughter. She has a real, genuine talent for writing. And if it weren’t for the subject matter, I probably would have just sent an email praising her talent, but
” Dan’s rambling comes to a slow halt as he notices Mr. Lester’s reaction to the journal, his body stiffening like he’s going into some sort of fight or flight mode. Dan wishes, briefly, that he could do something to help him relax, as the tense body language looks so out of place on him.
Dan watches quietly while Mr. Lester finishes reading it, and to Dan’s surprise, there’s actually a look of comprehension and understanding on his face when he’s finished. He folds it carefully, glancing up at Dan with a much more reserved look on his face than he’d worn just a few moments prior.
“Do you mind if I keep this?” He asks, surprising Dan even more.
“Uh, sure. Sir, I don’t mean to intrude, but
 Is this type of content typical of Willow? It’s rather dark for someone of her age, and-”
Mr. Lester cuts him off. “It is,” he sounds exhausted, suddenly, like this isn’t even the first time it’s happened. He tries to smile, but it’s not very convincing. “We
 She has a few things she’s working through, but it’s a process. I apologize if this upset you, Mr. Howell, but I promise everything is alright at home.”
Dan feels a little like he has whiplash then. Worrying about her mental wellbeing was as far as he’d gotten; he hadn’t even considered the state of her homelife, although he probably should have. “Er- right,” Dan says dumbly. “I just- I wasn’t sure how regular this behavior was for her and I like to make a parent content when I notice something I deem out of the ordinary, even though this was probably fairly-” Dan realizes he’s rambling again when Mr. Lester gives him a little smile.
“It’s quite alright, Mr. Howell. I appreciate the gesture, truly. And I will speak to Willow about this and ensure that the rest of her work is school-appropriate from here on out.” It sounds like a rehearsed speech, somehow.
“Sure
” Dan says slowly. “But
 When you do, if you don’t mind me saying this
 Please be sure to emphasize how talented she is. I mean,” Dan laughs, still a little in awe of the writing this child had produced. “This is probably better work than I could manage on a good day, and I would hate for this to be the thing that stifles that for her.”
Mr. Lester gives him a curious look then. Up until now, he’d only given Dan these vague smiles, like he thought he was stupid but endearing, but now he’s got a skeptical glint in his eye. Dan squirms under the assessing gaze, forcing himself to stand still, meeting Mr. Lester’s eye with what he hopes is an air of confidence.
“Right,” Mr. Lester says finally. Dan breathes out an inaudible sigh of relief, one he’s not so sure goes unnoticed. “Well, I appreciate this chat, Mr. Howell. It was lovely to meet you. Jack is such a wonderful kid to have in class, just so you know.”
Dan feels relief flood him, proud that he’d successfully navigated the hardest part of this conversation and now they can move on. He rolls his eyes when he processes Mr. Lester’s words. “Yeah, I’m sure he’s a delight. Honestly surprised he hasn’t been sent to the headmaster’s office yet, really.”
Mr. Lester laughs, reaching a pale hand up to cover his mouth as he does it. Dan swats away the pesky thought he has, telling him that it’s a cute gesture. “Well, he’s wonderful in my class. Very curious, asks a lot of questions, but
 We learn a lot when he’s in the room, for sure,” Mr. Lester says with a bright smile.
Dan warms at that, and he gives himself a second to feel smug. That’s his child, his curious little goblin. He made that! “Well, you’re lucky you don’t have to play 1,000 Ways to Drive Your Dad Insane every day after school. It’s his favorite game these days,” Dan says, sighing over-dramatically.
“Maybe we ought to trade sometime,” Mr. Lester jokes with a wink. Or what probably would have been a wink if he didn’t wink both eyes at the same time. Or maybe it was a blink and Dan’s just desperate.
“Absolutely,” Dan agrees absently.
Mr. Lester smiles, and right before he speaks again, they hear a voice from behind them.
“Dad? Can we go now?” Willow asks. She smiles sheepishly when Dan turns to look at her. “Sorry,” she says. “I’m just hungry.”
Like some kind of curse, Jack pops up next, looking absolutely deranged. “Yeah! Daddy, I’m hungry too!”
Dan rolls his eyes, turning to share a knowing look with the only other adult who understands his struggles here. “Well, I guess that’s the cue,” he jokes, scooping his son up when he starts to tug at Dan’s shirt.
Mr. Lester smiles but nods. “C’mon, Will,” he says, gesturing for his daughter. “Bye, Jack! See you next week!” He waves at Jack, who then throws his entire body into a big wave of his own.
“Bye, Mr. Lester! Bye, Willow. Don’t forget about the Pokemon snacks tomorrow!” Jack says.
Willow grins, giving him a thumbs-up. “Sure thing, buddy. Bye, Mr. Howell!” She waves too, then starts off down the hall without even looking to see if her father is following her.
Mr. Lester rolls his eyes, shaking his head when he makes eye contact with Dan. “Thank you for this,” he says, holding up the journal entry page. “It was lovely to meet you, Mr. Howell,” he says kindly before turning around to leave.
Dan sees his chance slipping away, and in true socially-awkward meerkat fashion, he chooses to rescue it in the worst way possible.
“Dan,” he calls out, probably far louder than is strictly necessary.
Mr. Lester turns to give him a strange look. “Sorry?”
Jack giggles. Dan clears his throat. “Er. Dan. That’s my name. You can
 You can call me Dan.”
Mr. Lester- Phil- smiles. “Alright. Bye, Dan.”
“Bye,” Dan says quietly, watching him leave.
He gets maybe three seconds of peace. Then, as sweetly as possible, his tiny child leans in close, making unnerving eye contact with Dan before saying, in his best approximation of Dan’s voice, “Dan. You can call me Dan.”
Dan groans, dropping his son to stand on his own in a flush of embarrassment. “Zip it, brat. I don’t wanna hear it.”
They close up and leave his classroom to the sounds of Jack’s uproarious laughter, a sound Dan wouldn’t change for the world. Even if it is at his expense.
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anironsidh · 4 years ago
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Presenting my Teacher au mood board, scratch bark bite (oh, love me, i lied), fic by @tarredion for the @oldschoolpbb 2021!
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I want to thank @tarredion for the privilege of being along for the ride of this au, thanks to @oldschoolpbb for hosting the event, and thanks to @simonlikesdnp for betaing!
There will be two or three more mood boards for this au, so stay tuned for those 👀
Find the post here and read the fic on ao3 here
Summary: Music & Drama teacher Dan Howell has a well-known rivalry with his coworker, English teacher Phil Lester.
An unforeseen event flips everything Dan thought he knew about Phil and himself on its head. Slowly but surely, the grudge withers, and the two of them cross the line between enemy and friend. But what will happen when their true intents and feelings get revealed? And was what they had ever really a rivalry? Was it even mutual?
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honeybooboothefool · 7 years ago
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phanfic · 6 years ago
Link
Words: 3.4k
Genre: Fluff, Alternate universe
Description: “They made it just in time, thanks to Dan covering the last part of the path with Nathan on his back and clutching onto his shoulders. He set him down and planted a kiss on the top of his head.
“Run kid, if you get inside before the bell rings, we’re free men!”
Nathan giggled and hurried to the gate, where a teacher was standing.
“Hi I’m Dan, Nathan’s dad, I’m assuming you’re his teacher?”
“Yes, I don’t think we’ve met yet,” Phil smiled. “My colleague Lisa usually does the openings.” “
Or the one in which Dan is a single dad managing running a flower shop and dealing with his five years old son, and his new teacher is very easy to like
Additional tags: strangers to lovers, parent!phan, florist!dan, teacher!phil
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doomedhowell · 7 years ago
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Oh, Teacher
Summary: Summer is over, and school is starting again. It’s Dan’s final year of high school. He’s a senior now, but that’s not the only thing that’s changed.
Genre: AU, Fluff
Word Count: 1,825
Trigger Warnings: swearing, studentxteacher relationship
A/N: Thanks so much to @vafa1808 for giving me this prompt :)
Dan lets out a sigh as he walks up to the school building, feeling less motivating about being back at school after having one of the best summers of his life. He’s been dreading about returning to school, although he’s not too upset because he’s happy that he gets to see his friends again.
Dan has a groupchat with his friends from school, and they’ve been texting each other all summer. Dan was away for most of the summer so he didn’t get to see his friends as much as he would have hoped for.
Dan shakes himself out of his thoughts before walking into school. He heads to his locker first before heading straight to his first period class, which happens to be English, his favorite subject.
“Hey stranger,”
Dan looks up when he hears the familiar voice and smiles when he sees his friend, PJ.
“Hey man! Good to see you again,” Dan says before pulling PJ into a hug. “No one else here yet?”
“It’s the first day of school, what do you think?” PJ chuckles. “Everybody is catching up with each other, however I don’t have the patience for that because it’s too early. I got here just as Mr. Lester did.”
Dan perks up as soon as PJ mentions Mr. Lester, the English teacher. “Mr. Lester is already here?”
“Yeah, but he went to the teacher’s lounge for something. I don’t really know,” PJ replies with a shrug before sitting back down in his seat. “Honestly, I’ll be surprised if Chris even shows up today.”
Dan laughs and nods in agreement. “Yeah, probably got drunk last night or did something stupid because he doesn’t want to go to school, but honestly
 I don’t blame him,,” he sighs before sitting in the seat next to PJ. “Can you believe we’re in our final year of high school? Like, we’re gonna be free after this.”
“I know,” PJ smiles as he looks over at Dan. “It’s fucking exciting, that’s what it is.”
Dan looks up as more students start piling into the classroom, and then sits up when he sees Mr. Lester.
Mr. Lester looks over and smiles when he sees Dan. “Good morning boys,” he greets.
“Morning Mr. Lester,” PJ replies back. “How are teachers always so awake on the first day of school?”
“They’re probably used to it now. Oh, hey. What a surprise!” Dan grins when Chris and a couple of their other friends finally walk into the classroom. Chris is known around the school for skipping classes and causing trouble, and he also happens to smoke and goes to a lot of parties just to get drunk.
“Shut up,” Chris mumbles as he takes a seat on the other side of PJ.
“We didn’t think you were gonna show up today,” PJ reaches over and kisses Chris.
“I wasn’t, but my parents made me so I didn’t really have a choice,” Chris sighs and rubs his eyes.
“You’re so cute when you’re tired in the morning,” PJ grins.
Dan rolls his eyes as he watches the couple. “You two are absolutely disgusting,” he groans.
PJ looks over at Dan. “Don’t be so jealous Daniel,” he warns playfully before smirking.
“Believe me, I have nothing to be jealous of,” Dan huffs.
“So, Daniel, how was your summer?” Chris asks as he looks over at Dan. “We hardly saw you.”
“Uh, yeah
 it was alright. My family and I went on a vacation so we were pretty busy,” Dan shrugs.
“A vacation? Surely Aiden would have been posting about that on Facebook?” PJ raises his eyebrows.
Dan looks over at PJ and raises his eyebrows. “I know, but, mom took away our phones for like two weeks while we were on vacation and we weren’t allowed to be on social media. It was one of those vacations,” he says, chuckling. “It was quite nice actually, not checking online every five minutes.”
“Shit,” PJ says as his eyes widen slightly. “I wouldn’t have been able to survive that.”
“Well, we were in Florida so we were busy a lot of the times,” Dan says. He places his hands on his desk and gently starts tapping on his desk, completely forgetting about the ring that sits on his finger.
PJ happens to glance over and blinks a few times when he spots the ring on Dan’s finger that he’s sure wasn’t there before, and it’s on his ring finger as well which confuses PJ.
“Hey, Dan? Where’d you get that ring from?” PJ asks curiously.
“What?” Dan asks, instantly looking over at PJ.
Chris looks over and raises his eyebrows when he sees what PJ is talking about. “Holy shit, dude,”
“Yeah, that ring. Where did you get it from?” PJ asks him again. “You didn’t have that ring before.”
“Oh, uh
 yeah,” Dan chuckles nervously as he looks down at the ring. “It’s cool. Got it this summer. Hey, did you guys here about that party happening this weekend?” He looks up at Chris and PJ.
“Party?” Chris asks, his head snapping up immediately. “What party is this?”
“I heard someone talking in the hallway saying that there’s going to be a party this weekend,” Dan says. “Like, for a back-to-school party thing. I don’t know. It’s just an excuse to throw a party.”
“Fuckin’ sweet. I need to find out more about this party,” Chris says.
PJ rolls his eyes. “Of course a party being mentioned would get you excited,” he mumbles.
“What can I say, babe? I’m a party animal,” Chris smirks, leaning back in his chair.
Dan snorts. “Why did you fall in love with this fool, Peej?”
“Hey!” Chris huffs and rolls his eyes. “Peej, beat him up. He’s being mean to me.”
“Okay,” PJ laughs. “I’ll get right on that.” He reaches over and gently pats Chris’s shoulder.
“Alright, class. Settle down. Take your seat, but don’t get too comfortable because we will be having assigned seats,” Mr. Lester says as he looks up at his class and he chuckles when they start groaning. “Okay then, let’s do attendance.” He sits down at his desk and pulls up the attendance.
Phil finally starts doing attendance, looking up as he says the students name.
“Noah Harrison?”
“Here,”
“Chris Kendall?”
Chris blinks a few times as he looks up, and instantly looks over at Dan, who doesn’t seem phased at all that Mr. Lester completely skipped his name on the attendance. “Um, here?”
“Dan Lester?”
“Here,” Dan says, looking up at Phil and smiling at him. He looks around and blinks a few times when he sees that his other classmates are staring at him with shock. “What?” He looks over at PJ.
“Lester?” PJ hisses. “What the hell, Dan? What happened to you this summer?”
“Oh, heh. Um, guess I left out a little detail about why we went to Florida, didn’t I?” Dan blushes.
“PJ Liguori?”
PJ looks up. “Um, here
” He mumbles, glancing over at Dan again. “You have a lot of explaining to do.”
“Later,” Dan whispers. He glances over at Phil once more before looking down at the ring on his hand and smiling to himself. He completely forgotten his other students had no idea that he got married this summer, let alone getting married to their teacher. He knew he had a lot to explain to his friends.
**
“Spill,” PJ says as he, Chris and Dan were standing outside waiting for their rides. School just ended and Dan’s been getting bugged all day about his last name change by Chris and PJ.
Dan sighs as he looks over at PJ. “I’m married now,” he tells him.
“You’re married?” Chris asks, raising his eyebrows. “You’re not even out of high school and you’re married?”
“What can I say? It’s not my fault that I fell in love,” Dan replies with a shrug.
“Dan? Are you ready to go?”
Dan looks over and he smiles when he sees Mr. Lester walking up to him. “I’m ready,” he reaches down and grabs his book bag from the ground, and then he reaches up and kisses Mr. Lester.
Chris and PJ are both in shock as they watch Dan, both eyes wide and jaws are wide open.
Dan looks over and laughs when he sees the look on their faces. “Surprise? Phil and I got married!”
Chris blinks a few times. “Phil?” He asks. “What the fuck, Dan? You married our teacher!”
“So, what? I’m an adult now, Chris. I’m eighteen years old. We’ve been dating secretly for two years but we wanted to get married as soon as I turned eighteen because no one can tell us no,” Dan explains.
“I mean
 I guess,” PJ sighs. “It’s just really weird.” He looks up at their teacher.
“I know it must be pretty shocking to learn about this,” Mr. Lester, Phil, says as he wraps an arm around Dan’s shoulder, and gently squeezes him. “But, I can assure you that Dan is safe with me. I love Dan and would never do anything to harm him, though I understand if you have your concerns.”
“This is not how I thought our first day of school would go,” PJ mumbles.
“Do you guys wanna come over to ours?” Dan asks. “We can talk about it more there.”
“Wait, you two are living together? How do your parents feel about this?” Chris asks.
“They were a little hesitant at first but, like I said before, I’m an adult now. I’m married, and I want to live with my husband. I don’t want to live with my parents. That’s weird,” Dan says.
“I guess that’s understandable,” PJ replies with a shrug.
“Why don’t you guys come over for dinner? It’s taco night,” Phil grins.
“Taco night?” Chris asks, his ears perking up instantly. “Oh, hell yeah!” He high fives Dan.
PJ rolls his eyes. “I swear, you are literally the most easiest to please,” he says.
“And, that’s such a bad thing?” Chris asks, looking over at PJ with a smirk on his face.
“I’m leaving!” PJ exclaims before walking away while Chris bursts into laughter.
“Hey, our car is the other way!” Dan shouts before following PJ.
“Hey, wait for me!” Chris shouts as he quickly follows Dan and PJ.
Phil chuckles and shakes his head as he watches the three, “What am I getting myself into?”
Dan looks over at Phil and smiles at him. “You coming, Phil?” He asks.
“Yeah, wait for me,” Phil says as he catches up with the other three. He catches up to Dan, and smiles before leaning down and kissing him. “Did you have a good first day of school, Bear?”
“Mhm,” Dan nods. “I’m just excited for this year to be over with so we can be free from this hell.”
“It’s not that bad,” Phil chuckles. “But, I understand. I’m just excited for what the future will bring us.”
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Link
Chapter 1/?
Word Count: 1.4K
light TW for this chapter, two (2) homophobic slurs in the first like, 6 paragraphs
Hey! Check out my new high school dan/teacher Phil AU
I’m hoping to update once a week.
Please reblog if you read!
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crystaiskiess · 7 years ago
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i’m bad at cooking (but not at loving you)
Part of the Our Photo Album series - does not need to be read in order but is recommended
Previous Part Series Masterlist
AO3 Link
Summary: 3 times Phil tries to make Dan breakfast, + 1 time it actually works
Author’s Notes: Hi all! I'm so sorry that it's been so long since I last posted school was insane and then I lost motivation for a bit! But I'm back and I'll do my best to post as often as possible!!! (Don't expect every Wednesday though unfortunately I can't make that happen!!!) I hope you're all well and that you enjoy this huge pile of fluff!!! :)))
1)
It was a cloudy, dark day outside, the sun barely emerged in whisps through cracks of clouds and rain pattered against the roof; creating a soft echo throughout Phil’s apartment. Phil yawned as he rubbed sleep residue from the corner of his eyes, smiling softly at the sleeping boy beside him. Dan’s hair was ruffled from the pillow, his lips parted as he breathed heavily, face smushed so that he was making an almost fishy face. Phil was struck by that oh so familiar feeling in his chest, a mix between fiery warmth in the pit of his belly and a tingle in his heart that crept all the way to the base of his throat. Love.
Softly, and being as careful as possible not to wake the sleeping boy Phil pressed a delicate kiss to Dan’s forehead. Smiling gently at the way Dan mumbled quietly in his sleep, cuddling closer to the pillow as though chasing Phil’s warmth. “I love you Daniel Howell,” Phil mumbled to no one in particular, his brain still fuzzy with sleep and the warmth of his bed.
Phil padded quietly down the hall towards the kitchen, in search of the familiar weight of a coffee mug in his hands. He smiled to himself as he listened to the rain continue to pour down, creating a soft ambience throughout the usually loud and bright apartment. It was as he made his way into the kitchen, allowing his hands to instinctively make his morning coffee and finding that he was making one for Dan without a second thought that he came up with idea. In hindsight, it wasn’t the brightest of ideas, and it certainly wasn’t one that he should have been making in such a half asleep state. However, on that dull, quiet morning Phil decided that he would make Dan breakfast.
There were two things wrong with that idea that sleep addled Phil didn’t think of. Firstly, Phil was not a good cook, he could barely scrape his way through a packet mix cake and was certainly not equipped to be making any form of breakfast. That was Dan’s speciality. Secondly, he didn’t really have the supplies to make breakfast. Being organised and buying the appropriate items of food to simply have around your house were not two things Phil was particularly good at doing. However, Phil thought of neither of these responsible issues and so he set off on his little idea. Managing to find a couple of eggs and enough milk to make them both coffees and add to scrambled eggs was deemed as a success to Phil. Clearly something was telling him that he was destined to make his boyfriend breakfast this morning.
So it was decided in Phil’s mind and he continued on, gently easing the door closed so as not to wake Dan, Phil opened his phone, allowing himself a brief smile at the adorable photo of Dan with sweater paws that was his lock screen, he put on some quiet music to play in the background of his cooking extravaganza. Phil smiled peacefully as he cracked an egg into the pan, humming along happily with the music. He turned around to begin putting the toast in (feeling very proud of himself for how organised he was being of course).
It was as he was sliding the pieces of bread into the toaster that an alert went off on his phone, which of course he couldn’t not check, and it was from Twitter so he slid open the notification without a second thought. What felt like only two seconds of scrolling later, suddenly he smelt a strange smell, and after a few sniffs he quickly identified the smell. “Shit!” Phil exclaimed, racing over to the blackened and smoky eggs, the awful concoction letting off a harsh smell of burntness and a lot of smoke. Phil removed the burnt eggs from the heat as quickly as possible, acutely aware of the large amounts of smoke drifting up to his ceiling. It was a moment too late that he realised he hadn’t turned the fan head on.
The smoke alarm trilled throughout the apartment, it’s high squeaks ringing in Phil’s eardrums and he winced as he pulled out a tea towel to fan at it. Hurried footsteps thundered down the corridor towards him and Phil sighed as he climbed on a chair to gain a higher vantage point to fan at the loud machine. Dan flung open the door, his bed head creating an almost quiff of curls and his eyes heavy due to still being half asleep. Phil smiled sheepishly at his dishevelled boyfriend, still waving the tea towel across the smoke alarm in the hopes of silencing it.
Dan raised a sleepy eyebrow at him, the corner of his lip quirking into a fond smile as he took in the state of the kitchen as the smoke alarm finally realised that there was no actual fire danger. Phil watched as the chocolate brown eyes took in the smoking eggs haphazardly thrown into the sink, the mess of shells left on the counter as Phil had been too lazy to put them away as he went, the large array of cooking utensils strewn all over the kitchen and his own boyfriend, Phil, standing on a chair, holding a pokemon tea towel and smiling at him sheepishly.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Dan asked, unable to hide the grin that covered his face, eyes sparkling with affection as he held out a hand to help Phil down. Phil smiled, accepting the hand and using it to tug Dan close to his chest when he reached the ground, his heart leaping with joy as Dan giggled softly, pressing a kiss to Phil’s cheek as Phil replied, “I made you breakfast,” he presented the smoking eggs with a flourish before wincing slightly in shame, “sort of?” “I am not eating that,” Dan replied with a snort, turning Phil’s face so that their noses brushed together as he pecked him gently on the lips, “but you’re cute.”
2)
The next time was slightly less of a catastrophe, although, not exactly successful either. It was a fair few months after Phil’s first attempt at making their breakfast. Despite Dan’s teasing Phil could tell he appreciated the gesture, no matter how badly it turned out, it’s the thought that counts okay?
This time however, Phil was determined to get it right, he got up at a reasonable hour and had prepared the night before. Purchasing the necessary equipment and ingredients and managing to find himself a recipe for french toast. Phil was adamant that nothing would go wrong this time. Once again padding out of the bedroom after kissing Dan’s sleeping forehead, this time in Dan’s apartment, Phil made his way to the kitchen. This time the atmosphere was brighter, although it was England and there was the mandatory clouds in the sky, the sun shone through the window creating a soft warm glow in the otherwise bare room.
As Phil wandered around the room, collecting bowls, spoons and ingredients, he was taken aback by how well he knew Dan’s kitchen, and how much his own possessions had integrated into this apartment. His coffee mug sat next to Dan’s on the counter and photos of the two of them could be seen in every nook and cranny. He smiled happily at the implications of their dual possessions as he bustled away, pouring milk and cracking eggs into a bowl. He reached for the vanilla extract, smiling at the photo Louise had taken of their first kiss, the sunset shining in the background. He hummed to himself as he waltzed across the kitchen, enjoying the pleasant buzz in the centre of his stomach that always began when he thought about Dan. Grabbing the loaf of bread and clicking the coffee machine on he started the stove, double checking the recipe to make sure he was doing it right. Once he had successfully dipped the french toast into the mixture and placed it in a pan ready to start frying he bumbled his way back into the bedroom.
Phil leaned against the doorframe, pausing for a moment to allow his heart to accept that this was something he could do. He could watch his boyfriend happily curled up in bed, with his crazily ruffled curls and his sleeping smile. He could walk over and cuddle Dan to his chest and whisper ‘I love yous’ until the sleeping boy woke up with a smile on his lips and dimples creating soft crevices in his cheeks. Phil sighed happily, watching as Dan shuffled around in his sleep, curls falling in front of his eyes. He tiptoed across the room, gently sliding into the bed and brushing Dan’s curls out of his face. With a gentle kisses to Dan’s cheeks and nose Phil watched as his boyfriend slowly emerged from slumber.
Dan blinked wearily before smiling, his eyes creasing with fondness that the students teased them about. Calling Dan Mr Heart Eyes instead of Mr Howell and creating ship names and theories behind their back which Phil secretly enjoyed to listen to. “What’s this?” Dan asked, snuggling into the crook of Phil’s neck, pressing their bodies so tightly together that Dan would definitely be able to feel the way Phil’s heart still sped up when they were together. Phil smiled, pulling them up so that their faces were in line and he had a good angle to kiss Dan softly, slotting their lips together lazily and allowing the love he held in his heart to pour through the kiss. Every time they kissed it felt magical, as dumb and cliche as that sounded, Phil could still feel his fingertips tingle and his heart skip a beat as Dan moved his lips slowly and lazily against his own. When they finally pulled apart, Phil began to drag Dan out of bed, much to the bemoaning of his boyfriend, “come on, I’ve got a surprise!” Phil grinned.
As they entered the kitchen, their hands intertwined between them, the coffee machine clicked over to ‘ready’ and Phil mentally applauded himself, perfect timing. Dan grinned in confusion, slipping onto the bench stool that Phil proudly directed him towards, “breakfast!” Phil cheered, doing cheezy jazz hands which made Dan snort with laughter, the noise filling Phil with a bubbly warm liquid like happiness. “That didn’t go so well last time,” Dan reminded him with a shit eating grin, resting his chin on his hands as he watched Phil get to work.
Phil tutted at his boyfriend, not looking up lest he get distracted by Dan’s beautiful face and make a silly mistake, “yes yes, but I’m doing better this time” Phil flipped the piece of bread onto the plate and risked a glance at Dan who was being as ridiculously beautiful as Phil had expected. With a hint of humour, tracing the fond lines of his face. “Mmmmhmm,” Dan hummed, watching as Phil made the other piece, sliding the plate of french toast towards himself and sprinkling some sugar on top, “do I eat?” Dan checked. Phil snuck a glance up at him and almost choked on his own spit at the way Dan was looking at him. With a mix of love, amusement and fondness all rolled into a soft smile.
“Um ugh uh yeah go-go for it,” Phil stammered, turning his flaming red cheeks back to the dish he was cooking. He listened as Dan took a bite, humming thoughtfully. Suddenly there was a gagging noise and a chunk of french toast flew onto the table, Phil glanced up in shock at Dan’s face, screwed up in disgust but still managing to laugh fondly through it all. “What happened?” Phil gaped, almost burning his hand on the pan as he got distracted. Dan wiggled his tongue around in disgust, his face screwed up in mock agony.
“Phil,” Dan laughed, his eyes crinkling with amusement, “I love you and all, but that was horrible !” Phil’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Why were they horrible though!” He pouted, “I followed the recipe to the exact!” Dan peered over the bench at the mixture, “what’s in that?” He asked, jumping off his stool to have a look at what was being made. Phil took the pan off the heat carefully and showed Dan the recipe. Dan nodded slowly, a realisation seeming to dawn on him, “did you notice that I moved my sweet flavours to the cupboard?” He asked with a knowing grin.
Phil stared at him blankly, following his eyeline to the bottle of vanilla extract he had used earlier. Only it wasn’t vanilla extract, it was soy sauce. He groaned in annoyance, “I’m an idiot.” Dan laughed softly, tugging him by the apron strings until they were flush against each other, “yeah, but you’re my idiot,” Dan whispered, kissing Phil gently.
3)
It was early in the morning, the sun rising in the sky as light filtered through the clouds. The air felt fresh as Phil breathed in, he quietly made his way down the hall of Dan’s- no- their apartment. Phil smiled to himself at the recent change, allowing tingles of happiness to creep down his arms and swirl in his stomach as he looked at the subtle way the apartment had changed since his ‘official’ move in. More socks decorated the surface of the home, much to Dan’s teasing and feigned annoyance. There were picture frames on their hall table of Phil and his brother next to the photos of Bea and Dan.
His footsteps seemed to echo in the quiet kitchen. To avoid any disasters Phil had decided to make a fruit muesli, no cooking, no disasters. He let his mind stray as he collected the fruit from the fridge, easily slipping back into thoughts of moving in with Dan. Kisses sitting on boxes and unpacking his possessions until they were propped up next to Dan’s, until their lives were intertwined together fully. He smiled to himself, remembering the way Dan had kissed Phil against the door to their bedroom until Phil’s knees had buckled and his insides had melted.
He was halfway done with the muesli when a flurry of footsteps raced into the kitchen, “fuck!” Dan screeched as he skidded into the kitchen, socks gliding across the wooden floorboards. Phil looked up in shock as Dan pecked him on the cheek with an apologetic wince, “what’s wrong?” He asked as Dan grabbed a piece of watermelon, noticing that Dan was wearing his suit, albeit slightly ruffled. “I forgot I’ve got a meeting this morning,” Dan mumbled quickly, his hair still sticking up from sleep and his eyes heavy, “I’m so sorry, I can see you were making breakfast
” Dan trailed off, his face falling to reveal his guilt.
Phil rolled his eyes, grabbing Dan gently by the badly tied tie and pulling him closer so that he could adjust the tie. His eyes were soft with affection, and he smiled at his boyfriend until Dan relaxed visibly before him, “I don’t mind you dork,” he pulled the tie tighter so that it was fit snugly and it looked much neater. “I love you,” Dan mumbled, cupping Phil’s face in his hands gently, “so much.” Phil smiled, kissing Dan once on the nose, once on each cheek and once on the lips, before replying, “I love you more.” Dan snorted, rolling his eyes, “fucking fight me.” “Bring it,” Phil giggled, wrapping his arms around Dan, so that they were cuddled close in the middle of their kitchen.
+1)
Phil had it planned out fully this time, he had subtly checked the night before that Dan was free the next morning; by subtly he meant that he asked, “are you free tomorrow?” Causing Dan to look at him with a mixture of amusement and affection before replying with, “yeah I am,” with a quirk of his lips that made Phil kiss him until neither of them could breathe. He had even gotten the family pancake recipe from his mother, to make sure he could successfully avoid any soy sauce incidents or smoking eggs.
As Phil pressed the usual soft kiss to Dan’s forehead his boyfriend stirred, “Wha’s happenin?” Dan mumbled, clearly still half asleep. Phil smiled softly, nuzzling his nose into Dan’s soft curls. “Nothing, don’t worry I’m just gonna do something,” Phil whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to Dan’s cheekbone, “go back to sleep,” he encouraged. “Don’t leave,” Dan whined, cuddling closer to Phil’s body, their limbs intertwining ever further, “stay,” Dan whispered, his eyes sliding closed again. Phil waited until Dan’s breathing evened out into slow inhales and exhales before carefully slipping out of the sleeping boy’s grip. Allowing a small smile to grace his features as Dan murmured something in his sleep and frowned ever so slightly before going back to his slumber.
Phil made his way to the kitchen, being careful to step over a shoe which had somehow made its way into the hallway. He smiled at the newly hung photo that he had taken of Dan and Bea clumsily dancing on the beach because they could hear their childhood favourite song. Phil drunk in the memory joyfully, even singing the song to himself as he entered the kitchen, pulling up the recipe on his phone and carefully getting the ingredients. Learning from his mistakes he carefully checked every label and was sure that he retrieved the correct ingredients. He quietly began the recipe, thinking about the two years he had already spent in Dan’s company and considered the future. Maybe one day Dan would introduce him to his family, Phil didn’t mind that they hadn’t told them yet though, he could respect that Dan needed time and that it was a terrifying step. In Phil’s mind they had all the time in the world, he could see himself in forty, fifty, sixty years time, still with Dan and living by his side. As, dare he even think it lest he jinx himself, husbands?
Phil had never voiced any of this aloud to Dan, he knew he got attached easily, and maybe Dan didn’t see themselves as clearly in the future. However, the longer Phil spent time with the brown, curly haired boy he couldn’t see a future without him. He couldn’t imagine living without Dan by his side, with his stupid jokes and his teasing smirk, his soft kisses and his cheesy pick up lines. Phil pulled himself out of the sappy hole he had fallen into, now was not the time for imagining his future with Dan, he was sure to do that in the shower, and that night, and at work, in fact Phil wasn’t sure when he wasn’t thinking about it at the moment. However at that moment as he was pouring pancake mixture into a hot frying pan, it was not the time.
The smell of cooking pancakes wafted down the hall and Phil smiled as he heard the tell-tale signs of rusting. In not even five minutes Dan was dawdling his way into the kitchen, a disbelieving smile tugging at his features and his phone in his hand. “I can’t believe you’re still trying to make breakfast for me!” Dan teased as he gently pressed a kiss to Phil’s cheek, “isn’t it time to give up by now?” “I’m determined, it’s going well this time,” Phil responded, with an exaggerated focused face.
Dan sniffed the air, a fond smile still brightening his features, “no soy sauce this time?” He poked Phil in the side gently, leaning into him ever so slightly while being careful not to inhibit his movement as he cooked. Phil rolled his eyes heavily, bumping his hip against Dan’s, “nope! I was super careful,” he turned his eyes off the pan quickly to take in the crinkles beside Dan’s eyes and the dimples in his cheeks, just awake Dan was one of Phil’s favourite Dans. Along with work Dan, tired Dan and sappy Dan, actually anything that was Dan.
Phil watched as his boyfriend pulled up a chair at the counter, his eyebrow still quirked ever so slightly as Phil flipped the pancake onto the plate. “Bon appetit mon cheri!” Phil presented the plate to Dan with an awful french accent. Dan laughed though so the slander of such a beautiful language was worth it. Phil watched anxiously, his own fork poised and ready to taste but too distracted by Dan and his mouthful to even notice he wasn’t eating. There was a pause as Dan chewed, exaggerating his movements to make Phil laugh.
“It’s delicious you spork,” Dan declared as he swallowed the mouthful, leaning across the bench to plant a pancake tasting, sleepy kiss to Phil’s lips, “you finally made me breakfast.”
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phanfictioncatalogue · 9 months ago
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Fluffy Ending (2) Masterlist
part one
All That Really Counted (ao3) - orphan_account
Summary: "Imagine your OTP in bed after a fight, facing away from each other. They both begin to feel guilty about the quarrel, and roll over to apologize
 at the same time. They do it so abruptly that they bump their heads together. After being dazed for a few moments, they giggle and kiss, twining their legs together and snuggling. They quietly murmur their apologies and endearments to each other until they fall asleep." based off of this tumblr prompt. (x)
Boy (wattpad) - wreckthisphan
Summary: “You’re an idiot but I’m an even bigger idiot, so let’s fall in love”. In which Phil is selectively mute but Dan can’t hear so that’s okay.
could've knocked me out with a feather (ao3) -deletable_bird
Summary: “Thank you, love you,” says the guy, and freezes. Dan’s smile suddenly feels a lot more genuine. Fluff, 2.6k
Flower Crown Luck (ao3) - HeartsAndSpades
Summary: Punk!Phil has a slight crush on Pastel!Dan and when Dan drops his flower crown in the library, Phil returns it and they start talking.
Friends Shouldn't Kiss Me Like You Do (ao3) - orphan_account
Summary: Dan knows Phil is in love with him, and has been since 2009. But as he realizes his feelings for Phil, Phil slowly stops loving him.
Hotel Day (ao3) - Fluffyphanfics
Summary: Dan and Phil do not have enough energy to go out of the hotel since they were at a YouTube event (you can choose). So, they have a lazy/fun day at the hotel
How Rare and Infinite It Truly Is That We Exist (ao3) - Felilla
Summary: In which Phil is obsessed with the stars and Dan realizes he’s in love with his best friend.
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it - phantasticlizzy
Summary: He feels it when Dan’s thumb is wiggling out of his grasp, rubbing the pink skin under his eye relentlessly, making Phil squint. “Stop that,” Dan says. His voice is commanding but also soft and it only makes Phil cry harder.
or: the aftermath of a fight
little by little (ao3) - deletable_bird
Summary: Dan's voice is voice relaxed and liquid, his posture much the same. He’s draped over the arm of the couch, looking at Phil upside down, the rim of a half-full wine glass clasped in the fingertips of his right hand. “You’re drunk, you arse,” Phil tells him, skirting the coffee table and sitting down at his feet.
Love Of My Life (Phan Fluff) (ao3) - thegirlwholikestowrite
Summary: I suck at summaries. Three words; Phan, fluff, coffeshop.
Play Me A Song, Write Me A Story (ao3) - phanimist
Summary: Dan is an English teacher who loves words but doesn’t quite love his job, and Phil is the new band conductor/music teacher with bright blue eyes that Dan loves to describe.Their friendship blossoms instantly, despite both of them wanting more right from the start.
Sick in New Years (ao3) - Fluffyphanfics
Summary: Prompt: Phil got really sick and he decided to have New Year alone at the apartment but Dan surprises him.
That Guy (ao3) - orphan_account
Summary: One video by a certain YouTuber has Dan Howell wondering for years.
We Always Come Home (ao3) - YourEyesHoldTheGalaxy
Summary: Dan comes back early from Playlist to an empty new flat and wonders what that means for him and his future with Phil.
We'll Never Be Royals (Extended) (ao3) - phanimist
Summary: royalty au where phil's the kind handsome prince and dan's a poor commoner who dreams of becoming world class musician. phil's parents hold a ball so he can meet his suitors, but he ends up falling for the pianist instead.
We’re Okay - whatisfanfiction
Summary: Dan is scarred, probably forever, which makes him vulnerable to ‘fits’. Phil, who takes Dan under his wing, tries to make things easier. Its just kinda angst with a really fluffy ending.
What was 2012? (ao3) - Yayroos
Summary: Dan and Phil talk about what 2012 was to them, now that they are together at last.
You Are Not Trivial (ao3) - phanimist
Summary: dan being a ghost doesn’t once hinder the friendship between him and phil. the two are constantly there for each other, despite their various differences in problems, and they never let the concepts of what’s ‘real’ and what isn’t define them and the relationship they have.
You're Beautiful (ao3) - Kovicenterprises
Summary: Dan's a sleepy baby and Phil can't help but fall in more in love with him every minute.
You’re Mine and I’m Yours - danalingphil-fics
Summary: Phil get’s possessive over Dan. Fluffy ending.
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fireicelapis · 7 years ago
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Fanart for one of my favorites fics, L’Histoire Française made by @danfanciesphil
L’Histoire Française it's a amazing fanfic and I recommend, is a phan teacher au. It has cute, funny and angst moments and the writing is also good!
Don't repost, like and reblog :)
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danfanciesphil · 7 years ago
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L’Histoire Française (New Chapter)
Teacher AU (Part 12)
(Part One)
(Part Two)
(Part Three)
(Part Four)
(Part Five)
(Part Six)
(Part Seven)
(Part Eight)
(Part Nine)
(Part Ten)
(Part Eleven)
(Now Available on Ao3!)
“Dan?”
The sound of Phil’s voice, confused as it is, is like a blanket of calm. Dan’s shoulders release their tension, and he sits heavily down on his bed, eyes slipping shut.
The phone clamped to his ear stays quiet for a moment, and then Dan can hear something, a clattering noise.
“Dan, are you okay?” Phil asks, concern creeping into his tone now.
“Yeah,” Dan says in a breath, nodding as the relief washes over him. “Yeah, sorry, I’m
 I was just
”
Dan trails off, teeth catching hold of his lip as he struggles with how to phrase this. The silence on the other end of the line goes on for around ten seconds.
“You’ve never called me before,” Phil notes quietly.
“First time for everything,” Dan says. He clears his throat, trying to gather himself together. “So, I was actually calling to say this is all a huge mistake, and that you shouldn’t come over tonight.”
“Oh,” comes Phil’s reply. There’s no mistaking the cut of disappointment in his voice.
Dan sighs, immediately feeling himself melt. “But I’m not gonna say that.”
“You’re gonna give me whiplash,” Phil says, making Dan smile.
“Sorry. I’m getting kind of anxious thinking about it is all,” Dan says, eyes travelling to the ceiling of his bedroom. “But talking to you is helping.”
“It is?”
Dan blinks in surprise. “Yeah, of course. You make everything better, didn’t you know?”
Phil laughs, sounding a little baffled. “No, I wasn’t aware. Um, that’s
 really nice. I’m glad I can help you to feel
 better. Is that okay to say?”
“I think so,” Dan says, shrugging to his empty room. “I’m not an expert in what’s okay and what’s not-okay for us from here on out.”
“No, me neither.”
“What are you doing?” Dan asks, mostly to steer the conversation into safer territory. “I heard clattering.”
“Oh, yeah, I’m baking cookies.”
“Cookies?” Dan says, sitting up a little straighter. “Cookies for who?”
He can hear Phil laughing at the eagerness of his tone. “For everyone. Teddy, Tyler, me, Buffy
 hmm, can’t think of anyone else, though.”
“I hate you,” Dan tells him fondly. “What kind of cookies are they?”
“Pecan and cinnamon.”
“I think I just drooled on myself.”
Phil laughs again, low and happy. Dan can picture they way his eyes are crinkling, sending a blossoming flower of warmth spreading through his chest. He thinks of Phil, covered head to toe in flour, a rolling pin in his hand, cutting little shapes out of dough, feeding Buffy globs of icing and whispering to her not to tell.
“I want to bake with you,” Dan says, not really thinking. He can feel the hearts in his eyes still, they’re cloaking everything in a rosy-lovestruck-haze. “I mean, if it’s not against the rules.”
“There are rules now?”
“Well no, I suppose not, but-”
“I doubt John wouldn’t be as mean as to stop us from whipping up some cakes together, Dan.”
Dan snorts, rolling his eyes. “Especially if we bring him a few.”
“That’s a plan, then.”
“Okay,” Dan says with a smile, incredibly happy that they’ve scheduled another time to hang out, even if it’s ill-advised. “And we’re still on for tonight?”
“Unless you ring me up in an hour and cancel,” Phil says.
“Hah
 I’ll try not to.”
“Seriously though,” Phil says, making Dan pause. “If you do get
 anxious or anything. Not just about tonight, but ever
 I want you to know that you can talk to me. You know, if it really does help you.”
The words knock the breath out of him. Nobody, Dan decides in that moment, not the ground Phil walks on, not the oxygen rushing into Phil’s lungs, will ever deserve him. He’s the purest, most selfless person on this earth.
“Thanks,” Dan whispers, though it’s a millionth of what he could say.
“No problem,” Phil tells him, sincerely. “I should
 probably get back to the cookies. Unless you need me to
”
“No, no, it’s okay,” Dan assures him. “I’m okay now. I’m chill.”
Phil laughs. “So I don’t need to bring you baked goods to make you feel better?”
“Oh, weird, I seem to be getting all worked up again
”
Phil laughs again, louder and brighter. “Cookies on their way. See you later.”
“Bye, Phil,” Dan says softly, a smile still warm on his face.
“Bye.”
The line drops, but Dan holds the phone to his face for another minute or two, listening to the crackle of the void where Phil’s sweet, reassuring voice just was, letting it glide, smooth and silken, over his skin.
*
“What’s this?” Dan asks, perplexed as a glass of clear, bubbling liquid is shoved into his hand.
“A drink,” Tyler replies, one eyebrow raised. “Don’t try and tell me you don’t need it.”
“You’ve been sitting in that spot by the window with your knee jiggling a mile a minute for like an hour,” Teddy agrees, glancing over the top of his laptop. “Drink the fucking G & T.”
“I don’t need-”
“If you won’t do it for us, do it for the poor driveway.”
“What?”
“You’ve been giving the driveway a laser death stare,” Teddy explains, making Tyler laugh. “Give it a break. Drink the alcohol, and let your poor muscles relax.”
“He’s not exactly a scary man,” Tyler reminds him; suddenly the drink in Dan’s hand looks a lot more appetising. “He’s
 well, I suppose he is rather intimidatingly attractive, but
”
Tyler trails off, his eyes glazing over. Teddy hurls a cushion at him.
“Quit daydreaming about Sexy Teacher,” he cries, annoyed. “He’s Dan’s anyway.”
Tyler smirks, walking over to the sofa and flopping down beside his boyfriend. “It’s unspeakably hot when you get all jealous, darling.”
Deciding that sobriety is, in fact, not his friend this evening, Dan gulps down some gin and tonic, wincing. He doesn’t particularly like the stuff, but Tyler loves to pretend he’s a bougie, pretentious gin connoisseur.
It’s at that moment that Dan hears the telltale sound of a car pulling into the driveway. He chokes a little on the gin, spluttering, and looks towards Tyler and Teddy in alarm.
“Ooh, here he is!” Tyler squeals, jumping up. “I’ll get the door.”
“Nope,” Dan objects, standing and grabbing Tyler by the arm. “You are not accosting him before he even gets inside, let me gradually lead him into the deep end at least.”
Tyler opens his mouth as if he’s about to object, but Dan hurries out of the room before he can listen to whatever inane protestation his flatmate is about to put forward. He gets to the front door just as the doorbell rings, and hauls it open before the sound has even finished.
Phil blinks in surprise, his hand still poised over the bell.
Oh, God, Dan thinks in despair. He looks sensational.
A thousand potential compliments rush through Dan’s blank mind, swirling into a frenzy. Phil’s hair is artfully tousled, fringe swept effortlessly to the side. He’s not wearing his glasses, meaning that the blue of his eyes shines out, pigmented and piercing. A tight black jumper hugs his torso, making him appear even leaner and taller. Teamed with the black skinnies he’s almost never without, he looks like he’s stepped off a runway at of Paris Fashion Week.
The only thing out of place is the flowery yellow cake tin tucked under one of his arms. Dan’s eyes fall to it, mostly so that he won’t gawp in a more inappropriate direction.
“Um, hi,” Phil says, and Dan realises he hasn’t said a word since he opened the door.
Resisting the urge to smack himself in the face, Dan laughs, feeling how pink his cheeks are becoming just at the sight of him. “Hi, sorry - my brain zonked out there for a second. Come in.”
Dan smiles in what he hopes is some semblance of a welcome, and steps aside to let Phil through. As Phil passes him, the tangy, sweet notes of his cologne brush into Dan’s senses, and he almost groans.
Instead, he takes a moment to gather himself, then shuts the door, sealing them both in the hallway, alone.
After a pretty awkward few moments of silence, where Dan genuinely can’t think of how to speak, Phil holds up the tin, smiling. “I brought cookies.”
“You did,” Dan agrees, reaching to receive the tin. “I mean, you said you would and
 you followed through. Thank you.”
Phil smiles a little wider. “Well, they’re not all for you.”
“Too bad, because I’m eating every single one, the others can suck it.”
“What can we suck, darling?” Tyler asks, strolling into the hall, Teddy at his side. “Phil! You made it. And you look ravishing, might I say.”
“Oh, th-thank you,” Phil replies politely. “Good to see you again, guys.”
“I get the feeling you don’t wear black very often,” Teddy says, circling him, vulture-like. “Is that correct?”
“Uh, I do generally like to be a bit more colourful, I suppose.”
“Well, dear, I think if you wore black every day you’d probably knock a dozen people out just on your way into work,” Teddy says, laughing. “So, perhaps it’s a good thing.”
“Is he saying he likes it, or
?” Phil asks Dan in a whisper, though his eyes are glinting with amusement.
Dan lets out a soft chuckle, still feeling a little out of it. Perhaps that early G & T wasn’t such a great idea. “Yes, he likes it.”
“Come on then, fellas,” Tyler says loudly, clapping his hands. “Let’s get some drinks together.”
“Do you like gin, Phil?” Teddy asks as they usher Phil towards the kitchen. “I only ask because if you say no, Tyler will probably ask you to leave.”
“Uh, I thought we were going to the pub?” Phil says, throwing Dan a confused glance.
Dan just shrugs; he’s gotten used to letting Tyler and Teddy dictate his every move when it comes to nights out, as it’s far easier than trying to keep up with whatever mad plan they cook up, let alone put his own opinion in. He’s kind of forgotten that that isn’t actually very normal.
“Oh, we are,” Tyler assures him, disappearing into the kitchen. Dan sighs, following along behind them all. “But first we’re going to have a little drinkie here.”
“Oh, well, in that case, you’d better make mine just a T,” Phil says, eyeing the enormous bottle of fancy-looking gin in Tyler’s hands with a fair amount of wariness. “Minus the G.”
Tyler and Teddy both whirl around to face him, utterly scandalised. Dan wishes he had better reflexes, because their faces are priceless, and he would have loved to capture them on his phone camera for future blackmail.
A couple of seconds pass though, and then they melt to expressions of confusion. Much less interesting.
“Sorry, darling, I think I misunderstood,” Tyler says with a concerned bubble of laughter. “I thought you said you didn’t want any of my gin. Obviously I’m mistaken.”
Phil laughs. “It’s nothing personal. I’m a big gin fan, but
 well, I can only really have one drink tonight, so I thought I’d save it for the pub.”
Dan frowns, fingers drumming on the lid of the tin in his hands. “What do you mean?”
“Well, I have to stay under the limit,” Phil explains, shrugging. The others continue staring in bewilderment. “... because I’m driving home,” he clarifies.
Oh, Dan thinks, blinking at the news. He hadn’t even considered that.
All of a sudden, Teddy and Tyler are bursting into laughter. “Oh, you are funny, Phil.”
“As if you’re driving home tonight!”
For some reason, Dan thinks he can see a light blush atop Phil’s cheeks. “Um
 well, I have to get home somehow
”
“No, sweetie!” Tyler says, struggling as he attempts to unscrew the lid of the bottle in his hands. “I won’t hear of it. Stay over here! You can sleep on the couch, it’s very comfortable.”
“You would know, Ty,” Teddy says, plucking the bottle out of Ty’s hands and twisting the lid off in one go.
Tyler rolls his eyes, taking the opened bottle back again. “On the rare occasions we have a little tiff, I might have ended up getting some rest on it myself,” Tyler admits. “Before Teddy comes downstairs all teary-eyed and drags me back up to bed, of course.”
Teddy smacks Tyler on the bum, rather hard. “You’ll be joining Phil tonight if you’re not careful.”
“With pleasure,” Tyler grins, winking at Phil.
Dan’s fingers scrape a little against the metallic lid, and he winces. 
“Um, look, guys, it’s very sweet of you to offer, but I’m not sure whether-”
“I’m not taking no for an answer, Phil,” Tyler warns him. He shoves a freshly made gin and tonic into Phil’s hand, effectively silencing him.
Clearly at a loss, Phil turns to Dan, as though asking his thoughts. Dan shrugs in what he hopes is a breezy, ‘whatever’ kind of way. It seems to confuse Phil a bit, understandably, as Dan literally almost hyperventilated down the phone at him a few hours ago, and that was just over worries about him coming over at all.
But the thing is, as Dan told Phil yesterday, this is all a pretty bad idea, probably. Dan’s since surrendered himself to that. Besides, it’s not like he doesn’t desperately, achingly want Phil to stay over tonight. In fact, he can think of nothing more that he’d wish for, at this time.
“The couch is pretty comfy,” Dan says after a minute, taking one of the glasses Tyler is handing out.
“Perfect!” Tyler cries, holding up his gin and tonic in salute. “So it’s settled. We’re all getting smashed, exposing our deepest, darkest secrets to one another, becoming the best of friends, and then we’re all coming back here to sleep and forget the whole thing ever happened.”
“Are you okay with it, though?” Dan asks Phil, wanting to be sure. “I mean, I don’t want to force you into sleeping on my sofa.”
“Yeah,” Teddy agrees, suspiciously sincere. He takes a sip from his drink. “I’m sure Dan has plenty of better options for you if the couch isn’t appealing.”
“Teddy, I will eviscerate you,” Dan grits out, glaring at him. Luckily, Phil seems to find this very amusing.
“Oh,” Tyler sighs happily. He rests his elbows on Dan and Phil’s shoulders, clinking his glass against theirs. “This is going to be a very fun night, boys.”
*
Dan kind of knows he shouldn’t, but he sits beside Phil on the sofa. He can feel Phil’s leg pressed against his as he sips at his second gin and tonic of the evening. It’s warm and reassuring. If he closes his eyes, he can remember how it felt to have Phil’s thighs either side of him, the weight of his body piled into his lap.
“So, Phil, did you have fun in Paris?”
Dan’s eyes fly open at Teddy’s question. He and Tyler are curled into the armchair again, all intertwined legs and draped elbows.
“Yeah, it was really good,” Phil replies. “I think it was really educational for the kids, which is nice. Plus we crammed a lot in.”
“So I hear,” Tyler says. Dan immediately feels his heart start to race. Why, oh why did he ever tell Tyler a damn thing? “What was your favourite part of the trip, Philly?”
Dan’s eyes fall closed, and he sips more of his drink. When Phil doesn’t answer, he looks over in surprise. Phil seems to be struggling for how to respond.
“Personally, I loved the MusĂ©e D’Orsay,” Dan jumps in, trying to come to Phil’s rescue. “You’d have really liked it, Teddy - the walls were these huge Monet canvases-”
“Um, no offence, Dan, but we’ve heard you blabber on about Paris for a week,” Tyler interrupts him. “I believe I asked Phil.”
Helpless, Dan sighs in defeat, aiming an apologetic glance in Phil’s direction. He just smiles, and clears his throat, looking down into his glass.
“Probably the boat trip,” Phil says at last, his long fingers closing tightly around Dan’s heart.
“Boat trip?” Teddy asks, frowning. “You didn’t mention that, Dan.”
Phil glances at him, questioning, but Dan doesn’t bother to respond. It’s not exactly an uncrackable mystery, why he chose not to divulge this small part of the trip. The memories of the boat are a little too personal, a little too painful to share with his idiot flatmates.
So Dan just shrugs, sipping more of his drink. It’s halfway gone already. Perhaps he should slow down.
“Yeah, it was
 just a small thing I booked as a surprise for the kids at the end,” Phil explains. He’s trying to play it down, make it seem like less than it was, Dan realises, marvelling once again that Phil is able to read him so easily. “Just one of those river cruises down the Seine, you know.”
“But-” Teddy starts to say, but Dan sits upright, needing to stop this conversation in its tracks.
“Hey, Phil made cookies for us,” he says as brightly as possible. “Let’s all have one.”
“Ooh, cookies!” Tyler exclaims, the boat forgotten, thank heavens.
Dan lifts himself up from the couch, walking briskly into the kitchen to find the tin Phil brought. His fingers rest atop the bright yellow lid, tracing the flowers etched into the design. He shuts his eyes, taking this moment of solitude to silently stuff each suffocating memory of that night last Sunday into the back of his mind.
It’s too much, to remember it now, in the face of everything. Of course that was Phil’s favourite moment of the trip. It’s Dan’s favourite moment of his entire life. It’s the moment when his very concept of reality exploded, supernova-style, as Phil’s lips crashed into his. With one unexpected kiss, he splintered Dan’s self-doubt into a thousand sparkling pieces, along with the certainty Dan had carried, that Phil would never, in a million universes, over a billion lifetimes, ever actually want him.
It still doesn’t make sense. It still feels like a dream.
The fairylights twinkling above their heads. The gentle rocking of the boat on the river over which a thousand lovers had once padlocked their names. The taste of red wine on Phil’s mouth. The silvery wisps of his breath, that Dan had been close enough to feel ghosting over his chin.
It’s a moment plucked from the most fantastical story. It’s the kind of thing that never happens to anyone, let alone Dan Howell, the anxious, socially-awkward teaching assistant from Reading, England.
If was a mad, perfect moment. And Dan will never know anything like it again, he’s sure.
“Hey,” a voice says, making Dan jump.
He turns to the doorway of the kitchen, heart fighting its way out of his chest. Phil is standing there, glass in hand. His expression is soft, like he’s looking at a lost kitten, rather than a twenty-something nerd staring at the tin he was supposed to bring in five minutes ago.
“Hi,” Dan says after a moment. “Sorry, I just
 I dunno, I got caught up in my own head for a sec. I’ll bring this in.”
Phil nods, and neither of them move. “I’m sorry if I
 said something I shouldn’t have.”
Dan scoffs. “Don’t be stupid. How were you supposed to know I didn’t tell them about, um, about
”
“The boat,” Phil says, a little sadly. “Why didn’t you?”
Dan sends him a look of scorn. “Come off it.”
Unexpectedly, Phil laughs. Dan joins in, both of them caught up in it for a moment. When he stops, Phil says, “it’s a nice memory.”
Dan shrugs, feeling his teeth bite at his lip, puncturing the skin. “It’s just hard to think about it right now, is all.”
“Yeah, I get it,” Phil says. He looks guilty, for some reason.
“Cookies will help,” Dan offers, picking the tin up and forcing a smile. “Come on. The others will have no problem eating me if they don’t get the baked goods they were promised.”
Phil doesn’t move, so Dan is forced to squeeze past him through the door. For the sake of his own sanity, he pretends he imagines the soft graze of Phil’s hand over his back as he goes.
*
“Please, take them away from me,” Tyler begs Teddy, who is feeding him a third cookie. “I’m going to have to book in three more gym sessions this week to make up for this.”
“Oh shut your face, you’re gorgeous and you know it,” Teddy says, rolling his eyes. He takes a bite of the cookie he’s holding, making an ‘mmm’ sound. “I have to say, Phil. You have truly exceeded my expectations. Must be all that time in Paris. The French do know how to bake.”
Phil chuckles politely, swallowing the last of his cookie. “Thanks. I did start baking a lot more when I lived in Paris, actually. It’s therapeutic, I find. And I was under a lot of stress, at the time.”
“Pourquoi?” Tyler asks, intrigued.
“Oh, um,” Phil says, unmistakably uncomfortable all of a sudden. Dan watches curiously, chewing on his own cookie, as Phil shifts about. “I was
 going through a breakup.”
Dan’s eyebrows lift; he doesn’t miss the worried glance Phil throws his way. He clears his throat, and drinks some more G & T, wondering if he’s about to have to listen to the wonders of whoever Phil’s ex was, on top of everything else.
“You had
 a Parisian lover?” Tyler asks, struggling to sit upright with Teddy on his knee. “A paramour, perhaps?”
Phil laughs awkwardly. “No, nothing like that. Paramour tends to refer to people having illicit affairs. I was just seeing someone for a time. But it didn’t work out.”
Dan rolls his eyes at Tyler, who is so clearly brimming with curiosity that it’s practically spilling out of his hungry eyes.
“These cookies are incredible, by the way,” Dan interjects, sensing Phil would like a change of subject.
Phil beams at him, opening his mouth to respond. Before he can get there, however, Tyler pipes up again.
“Male or female?”
Phil blinks at him. “Sorry?”
“Your non-paramour,” Tyler clarifies. “What gender were they?”
“Could be neither,” Teddy adds, nibbling. “We can’t cis-sume.”
Dan snorts. “Did you just make that word up?”
Teddy grins. “It works, don’t you think? No point cis-suming something.”
“Guys! I’m waiting for Phil’s answer,” Tyler shouts crossly.
“It was a man,” Phil says slowly, like he’s treading through a minefield.
“So you’re gay?” Tyler asks.
“Ty! For fuck’s sake,” Dan cries, glaring at him. “You don’t have to answer him, Phil. He’s being a prat.”
Phil just shrugs. “It’s okay. I guess I don’t really know what the future might bring, but at this point in my life I’ve only ever liked boys.”
Dan’s mouth is dry, suddenly. He puts the rest of his cookie to one side for a moment, scared he might choke. He pours the remainder of his drink down his throat, not listening to word of whatever Ty is babbling about. Something about the Kinsey Scale.
“Shall we get going?” Dan asks the general room, not really caring if they agree. He stands up, gathering his and Phil’s empty glasses and the cake tin, then heading into the kitchen. “Come on, if we don’t leave now we’ll end up staying here all night.”
“True,” Dan hears Teddy say as he leaves the room. “S’not like that hasn’t happened a few times.”
Before they get out of the door, Dan insists on making up a bed on the sofa for Phil. He knows what Tyler and Teddy are like on these pub trips - Dan will be surprised if any of them stumble back later with enough sense to open the front door, let alone throw some sheets and blankets together for poor Phil to sleep on.
Phil tries to protest as Dan gets the pillows and covers out of the cupboard, but Dan won’t hear of it. He does his best to make the sofa seem comfy, then stands back to survey his work. Tyler sidles up beside him, resting his elbow on Dan’s shoulders.
“Not sure why you’re bothering, to be honest, honey,” he says. “Not like he’s going to be sleeping here, after all.” Dan shoves him off, annoyed.
“Don’t be a twat, Ty,” Dan hisses, looking around the living room in case anyone heard.
Luckily, Phil and Teddy seem to have already migrated out into the hall.
Tyler lifts his hands in defence, smirking. “Dan, I’m just going off the fact that Sexy Teacher has stared pointedly at your ass every time your back is turned.”
Dan groans in despair, his cheeks beginning to burn. “Ty, can you please not? You know it’s not gonna happen, I told you-”
“Actually you just sobbed in my arms and told me fuck all,” Tyler corrects him. “It made me think things were pretty hopeless, honestly, but seeing how you two are around each other, I can’t help but wonder what the fuck you’re playing at.”
“It’s complicated!”
“Is it? Or are you just being a wimp?”
Dan opens his mouth, indignant, but before he can respond, Teddy is poking his head around the door, looking impatient.
“Are you guys coming, or what?”
*
Their local pub is called The Cat & Bear. It’s an old-fashioned, proper English tavern, with ivy crawling along the red brick outside, hops hanging from the dark oak bar, and some hearty British ales and stouts on tap. They sell the cheaper stuff too, of course: Carlsberg and Stella and all the other ‘lad’ lagers. None of them are particularly keen on beer, but they always drink it here, mostly because they’re too afraid to ask for anything else. Places like The Cat & Bear make people like Dan, Tyler, and Teddy painfully aware of how ‘millennial’ they are with their skinny jeans, side-fringes and colourful array of sexualities.
“Four Peronis, please,” Dan says to Frank, the beefy, bearded old barman in a voice that might be a shade lower than normal. 
Frank nods at him, which in Dan’s eyes is the equivalent of a hug from the surly man. All three of them have been coming here long enough now that Frank must know who they are, so it’s important to remain friendly and civil to him.
“Ordering for me, I see,” Phil says, appearing at Dan’s left elbow.
“Oh,” Dan says, having not even thought about it. “Sorry, I didn’t- do you like beer, or-”
Phil laughs at him, resting a hand on his shoulder. Dan wonders if he’d be so tactile if the gin and tonic from earlier wasn’t coursing through his veins.
“It’s fine,” Phil assures him. “I can do beer.”
“That’s the spirit, Phil,” Tyler says, pushing in between them to grab two of the Peronis Frank is putting on the bar. He takes a huge gulp from one, then burps softly into the crook of his elbow, grinning with pride. “You need to channel that masculine energy. Like Teddy and I.”
Dan laughs at this, rolling his eyes. “How will we ever keep up with you?”
“I’ll just take these to our table, you’re alright with getting this round, right Dan?”
Before Dan can respond, Tyler has disappeared, practically sprinting to the table Teddy has secured for them in the back. Dan glares after him, muttering about ungrateful moochers under his breath.
“Twenty quid, son,” Frank says, so Dan turns back, digging into his pocket.
Before he can even locate his wallet however, Phil is holding out a twenty pound note, and Frank is taking it from him without so much as a hesitation.
“Phil!” Dan exclaims. “You can’t- you didn’t have to-”
“Well I did,” Phil says, picking up one of the beers and sipping it, eyebrows raised. “What’re you gonna do about it?”
Dan chokes on the sip of Peroni in his mouth, and pretends not to see the smirk Phil gives him in response. “Phil, if you flirt with me tonight I will combust.”
“Noted,” Phil says with a wink, making Dan want to strangle him. “Drink your beer, Howell.”
As Phil turns to walk towards the table, Dan feels his soul clawing its way out of his body, desperate to run after him, to seal him in an embrace and never let go. Instead, he nods his thanks at frowny Frank, and follows Phil to join the others.
*
“So how did you all meet?” Phil asks with a smile.
Dan’s a quarter of the way through his beer already, and it’s been two minutes since he sat down. The good news is, Phil is beautiful, and in the low lighting of this lamplit pub, his pale skin has a golden shimmer.
The bad news is, all of this beauty is squashed against Dan in the tight booth that the others have chosen. Teddy and Tyler, opposite them, are happily snuggled up against each other. Dan is trying to burrow into the wall at his side so that he doesn’t get the world’s most innappropriate boner from being pressed against the man he shouldn’t even be thinking about, let alone crammed drunkenly into a small space with.
He takes another gulp of beer. “We met at uni.”
“Dan and I were roomies,” Tyler says, grinning. “Isn’t that right, hun?”
“Really?” Phil asks, sounding intrigued. “Like, you shared a room?”
“I know, it’s a chilling thought,” Dan deadpans. “Don’t ask me how I restrained from stringing myself up with his collection of ties.”
Tyler rolls his eyes. “You loved it.”
Dan leans towards Phil, shaking his head. “He snores. Loudly.”
“I do not!”
“You do,” Teddy jumps in, causing Tyler’s mouth to drop. “Why do you think I bought you that nasal strip?”
“To stimulate my airflow- oh my God. The betrayal!”
Phil is laughing at them, his eyes light and happy. His smile is so big, so bright and sunny, that it seems like he has never been sad in his life. If anyone in this pub looked over, they’d never believe that Phil had ever sat on the floor of the staff bathroom yesterday and told Dan all the things he thought he should hear ‘because I know I won’t get to, now’.
Phil’s positivity is so large that it outweighs anything sad. And it’s painful to see. Because Dan is nothing but his sadness right now. It fills him from head to toe. He wishes he could sweep it to one side like Phil has, and just enjoy being here, but he can’t. Phil is a rare jewel that Dan discovered in a dingy classroom, shrouded in the dust of an ancient bureaucratic system that doesn’t understand him. Dan found him, uncovered him, brushed away the dust, and now, at his most sparkling, he’s been stolen away.
He doesn’t realise he’s staring until Phil says his name.
“Hm?” Dan answers, not really present, still.
“I said do you want to play?”
Dan blinks in bewilderment, dazzled by the bright blue of Phil’s eyes. “Play what?”
“Truth or dare,” Tyler answers, grinning mischievously.
Oh no, Dan thinks, straightening in fear.
“It’ll be fun!” Teddy sings, smiling at him. Definitely oh no.
At a loss, Dan turns back to Phil. The older man has an ignorant, naive expression on his face, resembling someone who has no fucking clue what he’s in for.
Phil shrugs at him; there’s a glimmer in his eye. “How bad could it be?”
*
“Truth.”
“Would you rather have Frank over there give you a twelve hour full body massage,” Tyler begins, and Teddy pales.
“With a happy ending,” Dan adds, laughing.
“Right! Or kiss him for
 hmm, ten minutes.”
“With tongues,” Phil joins in, laughing as well. Teddy groans, placing his head into his hands.
Despite Dan’s initial reservations, the game is going well. It’s certainly helping to lift the tension Dan can feel wrapped like writhing snake around his and Phil’s shoulders. They’re having fun, and it’s honestly just what Dan needs right now. He hasn’t smiled properly since Tuesday.
“Ugh, I guess
 kiss him,” Teddy says, and everyone makes noises of disgust.
“Poor Frank,” Tyler says, glancing over at where the man in polishing a glass behind the bar.
“Um, excuse me?” Teddy exclaims, jabbing Tyler in the chest. “Poor Frank?”
Tyler just laughs at him, turning to Phil. “Okay, you’re up, Frenchie.”
“You know, I’m from Rossendale,” Phil tells him, chuckling. “England. I just speak French.”
“Whatever,” Tyler says, batting his objections away. “It’s your turn, mon chĂ©ri.”
Shaking his head in amusement, Phil leans back in his seat, thinking. “Hmm. I think I’ll go with d-”
Dan’s hand flies out before he can stop it, clapping itself over Phil’s mouth. Phil’s eyes widen in alarm, head pushed back against the seat by the force.
“Don’t do it,” Dan urges, suddenly panicked. “They’re evil, Phil. Don’t underestimate them.”
Tyler scoffs, looking put out. “Dan, let the poor man make up his own mind.”
Dan removes his hand, still terrified. The problem is, Phil sees the good in everyone. He needs to realise that Tyler and Teddy only have a very limited supply of goodness in their entire bodies. And when they’re together, in situations like this, it almost entirely disappears.
Phil glances around the table, looking far more wary now than he was a moment before. He licks his lips, making Dan blush.
“Uh, truth then, I guess.”
“Ugh,” Tyler groans, banging his forehead on the table. “You see what you’ve done, Daniel? You’re a manipulative little weasel, using your seductive powers on a poor, unsuspecting young Frenchman-”
Dan tunes him out in order to lean close to Phil. “You made the right decision. He definitely had a dare in mind for you. Be careful.”
Phil nods seriously, but Dan can see the disbelieving little smirk he wears beneath it. He still doesn’t understand that he’s in danger here. Tyler is a fucking wild card, and as for Teddy once he’s had a few

“Fine!” Tyler shouts, having finished his rant, apparently. “A fucking truth for Phil, then.”
“Where on his body is Dan most sensitive?” Teddy asks sweetly, tilting his head to one side.
Tyler turns to him, mouth agape. “Oh, I love you.”
The pub goes deathly silent, Dan is sure. A hush descends over the entire room, and all eyes swivel their way. Dan feels like he’s about to burst into flames, and as he stares down into the remains of his beer, he imagines it boiling under the heat of his laser-stare.
Phil laughs, sounding a bit thrown by the question. Perhaps that might be an understatement, but Dan genuinely can’t bring himself to look.
“Uh, how would I know that?” Phil asks, and Dan’s eyes flutter closed.
Teddy shrugs, smiling too wide. Dan had it all wrong. Tyler was never the one to fear. It was Teddy, all this time, the true demon, the ultimate nemesis, hidden behind Tyler’s boisterous attitude-
“No reason,” he chirps, taking a sip of his beer.
Tyler is kissing his hand in adoration; Dan wonders how much paperwork would be involved in trying to prematurely get out of their year-long lease of the house.
Dan takes a deep breath and sits up, forcing himself to look Phil in the eye. His expression is unreadable, but calm.
“So
 you told them, then,” Phil guesses, one eyebrow cocked; somehow he’s still smiling, and it’s the only thing that’s holding Dan together.
Dan grimaces. “I didn’t mean to
 it’s just that after you
 on the boat-”
“Aha, so the boat was a thing!” Tyler interrupts, but Teddy shushes him.
“-after that,” Dan continues, his words jumbling together in his haste to get them out. “I was in the room alone and I was freaking out, so I don’t know why the fuck I thought it was a good idea, but I texted Ty. I just don’t have any other friends I could talk to about it and
 yeah. So they know.”
Phil is nodding slowly, digesting the information as it spills, garbled, from Dan’s mouth.
“Say something, for the love of God,” Dan urges, feeling like he’s about to tumble over some glacial cliff-face.
“Neck,” Phil says, baffling everyone.
“Sorry?” Tyler asks.
“His neck,” Phil says again, he swallows some of his beer. “That’s where he’s most sensitive.”
Immediately, Dan seizes up, mortified, and buries his face in his elbow on the table. He groans, listening to the cackles of laughter coming from the other side of the table.
“I knew it!” Tyler exclaims, which is bullshit, Dan can’t help but think. “Steph would never tell me, but I just sensed it from how she smiled when I guessed his neck, do you remember Ted-”
“Who’s Stephanie?” Phil asks, calmly sipping some more beer.
Dan sits bolt upright, the humiliation slipping into terror once again. His heart simply cannot take this veering between extreme emotions, he’s sure. He tries to glare at Teddy and Tyler, to stop them from answering, but they are too plastered at this point to remember he’s even there.
“Oh, that’s Dan’s ex-girlfriend,” Teddy replies cheerily.
“Scary Stephanie,” Tyler laughs. “We call her that now because whenever we meet up with her all she does is glare at Dan and throw passive aggressive insults about him into conversation.”
“Like when she said he was always dropping not-so-subtle hints that he’s a furry-”
“Oh my GOD, please shut up!”
Tyler and Teddy turn to Dan, startled.
“Oh, it’s okay, sweetie. Phil understands!” Tyler says, giving him a bright smile.
Dan just rubs his eyes with his palms, trying to summon Satan himself to come and smite these two fuckwits before anything else comes out of their stupid mouths.
“I need another drink,” Dan groans, getting to his feet. He doesn’t dare look at Phil, because he knows he would instantly splinter into pieces, no matter what expression he found on Phil’s face. Instead, he stares resolutely at the table. “Can I get past you, please?”
As if it hadn’t even occurred to him until that point, Phil leaps up at once, sidestepping out of the booth so that Dan can get out. Dan mutters a vague ‘thanks’ and strides straight to the bar, not even bothering to ask if anyone else wants anything.
He beelines for Frank - sweet, predictably silent Frank - cursing himself for ever allowing this night to happen, and trying very, very hard not to imagine what further intimate details about his life Teddy and Tyler could be discussing with Phil right now.
*
Just as Dan feels the first, glorious sip of sharp, crisp Peroni on his tongue, a hand is slapping down a ten pound note onto the bar beside him.
“I’ll have what he’s having,” Phil tells Frank with a smile so big, so charming, that Frank actually looks a little dazed.
“Oh, God, please allow me a moment to recover,” Dan groans, still not meeting his eye. “And I am absolutely paying for these, so-”
“Dan, your flatmates just outed you as a furry to a guy you’ve made out with once,” Phil reminds him. “I’ll get your drink.”
Dan turns to him, his defences flaring. “No, wait, okay, I’m not a furry, it was just a joke- Stephanie had no sense of humour, it was one of the reasons I broke up with her-”
Phil kisses him on the cheek.
It’s an effective method of stopping the rambling, Dan will give him that. His elbow also slips off the bar in his surprise, and he nearly topples to the dirty  floor. Phil catches him by the elbow just in time.
The whole few seconds are like a scene from a silent film.
“Uh,” Dan says, sure that Phil’s lips are probably scalded from the furnace of his cheeks. “I don’t
 did you mean to
”
“Here you are, son.”
Phil turns to take the frothing pint from Frank, and presses the ten pound note into his outstretched hand. Dan is too dazed to argue, at this point.
“Merci,” Phil says, and the corner of Frank’s mouth quirks up.
It only makes the whole situation ten times more surreal.
“I shouldn’t have done that, I know,” Phil says quietly to Dan, one finger scooping up some beer-froth and depositing it into his mouth. Dan’s eyes helplessly follow the action. “I don’t appear to have a whole lot of self-restraint this evening.”
Dan’s eyes fall closed. “Great,” he says through gritted teeth. “Because we both know what a master of composure and dignity I am.”
Phil chuckles. “Are you really a furry?”
“No!” Dan exclaims, spilling some of his beer in frustration. “I told you-”
“I’m kidding,” Phil laughs, placing a hand on Dan’s arm. It could be made of razorblades, it’s so painful to feel. “Your flatmates are fun, but they seem to be kind of, um, what’s the word
?”
“Inconsiderate?”
“I was gonna go with dickheads, but sure,” Phil jokes, eyes sparkling.
Dan wonders if the reason Frank smiled in what is the first instance Dan has seen in all the time he’s been coming here, is because it’s hopeless to look at Phil and do anything but. He’s an ocean of warm, clear water, rippling and sparkling on a summer day. Dan wants to dive in, to submerge himself and never come out. More than that. He wants to drown.
“Is that what you are, then?” Dan finds himself saying.
Phil frowns in confusion. “Hm?”
“‘A guy I made out with once,” Dan reminds him. “A minute ago you said
”
“Oh,” Phil says, his smile fading a little. He shrugs. “I guess, yeah. But I hope I’m more than that, too.”
“Like what?” Dan says, his eyes stinging.
“Well, I hope I’m your friend, Dan.”
The fist that’s been clamped around Dan’s heart all night squeezes tight, too tight, and he feels it deflate like a burst balloon, until its shrivelled, a husk of itself.
“Oh,” Dan whispers, staring into his drink. “Yeah, of course you are.”
*
When they get back to the table, Tyler and Teddy are, rather noisily, making out.
Dan and Phil sit opposite them, eyes wide in a kind of fascinated horror, as they watch them paw at one another.
“It’s kind of grotesque
 but I can’t look away,” Phil says softly. He immediately takes an enormous gulp of beer.
“They do this every time,” Dan sighs. “Imagine being here alone with them.”
“That sounds even worse.”
“Welcome to most of my Saturday nights.”
Phil turns to face him. “Maybe next time you should hang out with me instead.”
Dan snorts. “Right. Because we’re doing the mates thing now.”
“Yeah,” Phil says, a tiny smile on his face. “Mates-dates.”
Dan’s poor, shrivelled heart gives a tiny pang. “It was a real date once. How did that happen.”
“Dan,” Phil says, sad.
“Yeah,” Dan sighs, staring bitterly at Tyler and Teddy. “I know.”
How come it all came so easily to them? Dan lived with Tyler for their first year of university. Then one day, Teddy sat behind Dan in the lecture hall and noticed him streaming Peep Show on his laptop instead of taking notes. He leaned forwards and asked Dan to turn the subtitles on, and they became immediate friends. Dan brought him back to the flat one day, he met Ty, and that was it.
They dated for a while, had a lot of loud sex in the bedroom next to Dan’s, then in third year, Teddy moved in. And when Tyler and Dan decided to change up the flat for a bigger place somewhere further away from the town, Teddy was just included in the move.
It was all so simple with them.
Dan turns to Phil, a bit surprised at how close they’ve positioned themselves. Dan tells himself to move away, because it’s not helping things, but his body isn’t listening. Phil is like a magnet for him, alluring and irresistible.
One of Phil’s hands reaches up and brushes a strand of hair from Dan’s forehead. “What’re you thinking about?”
Dan could cry. He really could.
Phil’s eyes are so many shades of blue.
“Oh, just how the world hates me and wants me to suffer,” Dan replies in a vague attempt to keep things light.
Phil looks like he’s been struck with a hammer. The finger he used to sweep away the strand of hair traces around the curve of Dan’s cheek, gliding across his jaw.
“Fuck it,” Phil whispers.
Dan’s eyes widen at the unusual sound of Phil swearing, and then he’s being kissed. 
Not just kissed, but really kissed. 
He feels his head being cradled in two big, sturdy hands. Phil’s lips are sealed to his, soft but unyielding, trapping the breath in his lungs. Phil’s fingers plunge into his hair, raking over the base of Dan’s skull, making him shudder.
Dan leans into him, wanting closer, more, softer, rawer - everything he can get. Phil is a rain storm, splashing over the parched earth of Dan’s hopeless desire, conjuring life back into his roots, coaxing the withered leaves from their furls.
Dan is only aware of his own surroundings again when he hears a voice splitting through the heavenly vacuum that is Phil kissing him into dizzied, star-grazed pieces.
“Woaah, what’s goin’ on here then, fellas?” Tyler asks, apparently having surfaced from Teddy’s esophagus long enough to notice what was happening.
Phil draws back, sighing, and Dan’s entire soul is ripped out of his body, attached to Phil as he leans away.  “Problem, Tyler?”
“Nope,” Ty replies, staring at Dan, eyes wide and questioning. “Do continue.”
Without thinking about it, Dan grabs hold of Phil by the collar of his jumper and pulls him in, kissing him soundly, holding him in place. Phil makes a noise of surprise against his lips, laughing a little, but he allows it to happen nevertheless.
If Tyler and Teddy whistle and cheer in the background, Dan pretends not to hear them.
*
It usually takes the three of them far longer to wind their way back home from the pub than it does to walk down there, because, for lack of a better explanation, by the time they leave The Cat & Bear, they’re all usually plastered.
This time however, it takes even longer.
This is mostly because Dan cannot, for the life of him, stop kissing Phil. As he pauses to push their lips together for the third time in what must be five steps, he starts to wonder if he might have some kind of addiction. He’s never heard of anyone getting addicted to anything in less than half an hour, but that’s the only explanation he can think of.
“Dan, for God’s sake, Phil’s mouth will be there when we get home,” Teddy yells as he notices how far behind they are. “You’ve got the fucking house keys, now hurry up.”
“Don’t listen to him, he’s grumpy because he thinks he’s gonna get laid when we get in, and you guys are preventing that,” Tyler calls to them, laughing.
Upon hearing this, Teddy promptly hoists Tyler up onto his shoulder, fireman style, making him shriek. Dan laughs as he watches Teddy begin running with him down the dark, deserted street, Tyler cursing and threatening him all the while.
“I’m surprised he can lift him,” Phil comments.
“Teddy’s one of those weirdly strong people,” Dan says, the two of them falling into step together, their linked hands swinging between them. “Looks like a twig, lifts like a Womping Willow.”
Phil chuckles. “Is that what you’re like, too?”
“Fuck no, I can’t lift a marshmallow.”
Before Dan can even fathom what’s happening, his arms are being pulled over Phil’s neck from behind, and his feet are no longer touching the floor. In seconds he’s hoisted onto Phil’s back, his thighs either side of Phil’s waist, clutched in his big, strong hands.
“Oh my God, oh my God,” Dan babbles, terrified. He clings on for dear life, much to Phil’s amusement, and then they’re moving, faster than Dan would have thought possible, tearing down the road at a mad speed. “Oh my God, Phil, what the fuck are you-”
They catch up to Tyler and Teddy, who both scream with laughter when they see what’s happening. Somehow, there’s a half-incomprehensible conversation, and then they’re racing each other down the road, Tyler on Teddy’s back, Dan on Phil’s.
Dan is screaming for his life, so it seems, and somehow they’re winning. When they cross the finish line (a streetlight), Phil somehow swivels Dan round his body, allowing him to slip off, and kisses him, in the middle of the road, to the tune of Tyler’s screams of ‘cheaters!’.
*
Tyler insists on the final drink when they get home. Dan tries to protest, because honestly the walls are already breathing, but Tyler cannot be reasoned with, particularly when drunk.
They sit in the lounge, Dan on the end of the sofa where Phil’s feet will be when he lays down here tonight. He feels like he’s floating, like the air itself is made of helium, and he’s about to drift off into the centre of the room, buffeted about like a feather in a breeze. Then, he looks down at his hand, interlocked with Phil’s so tightly that he wonders whether the lack of blood flow might affect him. Phil is anchoring him to the spot, keeping him safe, present, whole.
Phil smiles at him, sparks of colour flying from his beautiful face. There are no words in Dan’s mind anymore, when he looks at Phil. Only shapes, vibrations, and thick, glutinous adoration, coating every muscle, every vein, every molecule of his body.
“Ugh, get a room,” Teddy says, making Tyler giggle.
Phil blushes, tearing his eyes from Dan’s. “Actually guys, I think you’ll find you’re in my room.”
“You’d better fucking not have sex on this couch, Dan,” Tyler warns.
“Oh my God, Ty,” Dan groans; he’d actually thought the humiliation was over for the night. Oh, what a fun treat it is to find out that that’s not true.
“Who wants to watch some bad movies and drunkenly bitch about the actors?” Teddy asks brightly.
Tyler groans, his eyes rolling back. “Nobody does, darling.”
“But-”
“I think it’s time for bed, don’t you?”
The protest dies on Teddy’s lips, and he visibly perks up, nodding. “Good idea.”
Teddy downs the last of his G & T in one gulp, and rises from the armchair, holding out a hand for Ty.
“Night, guys!” Teddy calls as Tyler stands to join him, rolling his eyes at Dan and Phil.
“He’s so easy,” Tyler tells them. “Night boys. Hope the sofa isn’t too uncomfortable, Phil.”
There’s an obvious laugh concealed in his voice, and Teddy hears it at once, snorting.
“Yeah, hope you have an okay night out here all on your own, Phil!” Teddy calls over his shoulder, sending Tyler into fits of giggles. “Dan, Tyler and I will all see you in the morning!”
“Fuck off, will you,” Dan shouts vaguely as he hears footsteps climbing the stairs, and then, mercifully, they are gone.
In their absence, a silence settles, like the dust after a tornado.
“So,” Dan says after a moment, just for something to break the quiet. Phil’s thumb is stroking over the top of his knuckles - very distracting. “D’you
 do you wanna watch a film or something? We could watch Buffy, I think it’s on Netflix
”
Phil uses their connected hands to drag Dan across the space between them, until they’re pressed against one another, faces close. Dan’s heart is about to give out, he’s sure. Phil’s kiss re-inflated it, but it’s still damaged, and unsure.
Dan has no idea what is happening. This whole night has been the wildest rollercoaster, throwing him curveballs left and right. He doesn’t think he’s had one consecutive emotion for more than three minutes at one time, all evening.
Why would Phil kiss him, now, after everything he’s said, after breaking Dan into bits as he listed all the reasons he couldn’t? Dan feels like he’s been hurled out into space, totally lost, spinning and tumbling through a void, surviving on the snippets of oxygen Phil is handing him in the form of kisses.
“Dan, stop thinking,” Phil tells him in a whisper. “I did it, I kissed you. It’s too late to take it back. I broke the rules, and it’s already happened. Let’s not think about it anymore.”
“I don’t know if I can do that,” Dan admits, saddened by his own words.
Phil frowns, but nods in understanding. “Can we stop thinking about it
 just for tonight, then?”
Dan hesitates, caught up again in the impossible depths of Phil’s swirling blue eyes. Their lips are so close already, but Phil tilts forwards just a little, brushing them together. And in that one, fleeting touch, a tsunami surges up inside of Dan, ferocious in its want for the man in front of him, suffocating and everywhere.
“Okay,” Dan finds himself saying.
He expects Phil to kiss him, then, but instead he just smiles. It’s a smile of relief, Dan thinks, of letting go of whatever troubles that might have been plaguing that bizarre, beautiful mind.
In the wake of the expected kiss, Dan shifts, feeling all of a sudden unsure. 
What exactly is going to happen now?
“So, did you want me to put Buffy on?”
An amused smile forms on Phil’s lips. “No,” he says softly. “She’d only get jealous.”
“Of what?”
This time, Phil does kiss him. He hauls Dan onto his lap, and kisses him senseless, his hands bracing Dan’s waist, fingertips skimming the skin below the hem of Dan’s shirt.
Dan falls into it, tasting nirvana in the sweep of Phil’s tongue across his lip, and feeling, in his pounding heart, the formation of a new star. Phil uses his teeth, capturing Dan’s lip, scraping along his jaw. He moves to Dan’s neck, lighting every single one of Dan’s nerves on fire; Dan winds his fingers into Phil’s hair, tightly - maybe too tightly - but Phil doesn’t seem to care.
At the very instant Dan can’t take a second more, he draws back, sensing another hickey is already blooming, but hardly giving it a second thought. He brings his forehead to Phil’s, breathing hard, and says, “you don’t have to sleep here, you know.”
Phil smiles, mischievous. “I don’t?”
“Not if you
 don’t want to.”
“But, Dan,” Phil says, his voice innocent, his hands sliding up Dan’s thighs. “Where else would I sleep?”
“Maybe
. you won’t be sleeping,” Dan replies, internally cringing at his attempts at flirtation.
How does Phil make this look so easy?
Phil’s hands are on his hips now, gradually moving still; Dan’s trying to breathe through it, but he can feel how the touch is affecting him, systematically unthreading each stitch that’s holding him together.
“Why would I not be sleeping, exactly?”
That’s it, Dan decides. He cannot take one fucking millisecond more of this. Phil is right, they can shove everything else to the side, because Dan has spent what feels like eons waiting for this opportunity. So, he slides off Phil’s lap, stands up, and holds out his hand.
“Allow me to demonstrate,” Dan says.
(Part Thirteen!)
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murphy-kitt · 3 years ago
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I have an au idea where Danny loses his memory everytime he goes ghost and turns human again, so he doesn’t know he’s part ghost.
After the accident, Danny doesn’t have any control of his powers, so his ghost half runs off of every instinct it has instead. If he feels threatened by the ghosts, or someone is in danger, or they’re in his “territory” his ghost half takes over and he runs purely off that. No one ever catches Danny transforming because his ghost instincts make him feel really overwhelmed, so he’ll go some place alone that he’ll feel safer. Which is why it’s so confusing to Danny when he comes back into “consciousness” (detransforms) that he’s injured, and in a place that he definitely wasn’t beforehand.
Danny still gets his powers acting up in his human form, but he doesn’t know they’re ghost powers, and just thinks they’re either a figment of his imagination or a temporary side effect of the portal accident. Danny’s parents, Jazz, Sam, Tucker, his teachers, probably more people begin to get concerned as to why his grades are slipping so quickly, as to why he’s always injured, always running away somewhere, always really tired and drained, and even Danny doesn’t know himself. He’s studying just the same he did before the accident, yet his grades are falling even though nothing has changed. He’s randomly injured all the time, and some of the injuries he’s ended up with should’ve been fatal enough to kill him. The only one he could answer for is the running away part that he gets overwhelmed easily so he goes to a safe place, but even then he ends up somewhere completely different.
Meanwhile, the Amity Park citizens have been beginning to pick up on a ghost who is actually good and fighting on their side and is in plenty of newspaper articles. Someone manages to get a tv interview but the ghost seems pretty out of it the whole time. Danny thinks that ghost looks familiar.
Overtime, the “flukes” have also been pretty annoying to Danny, suddenly falling through floors, his friends suddenly not able to see him, dropping random objects, they can’t be figments of his imagination because they’ve happened too much. Danny overhears his parents speaking about the new ghost (not knowing it’s actually himself), and hears something about invisibility and intangibility. He realises that he has ghost powers, probably from the accident. He doesn’t look like a ghost though, and he still has a heartbeat.
On the flipside, Phantom, believes he died in the portal accident and is now a ghost. He knows he randomly appears at times to fight the ghosts, and presumed he just goes back to the ghost zone (he transforms back to human). He knows his parents are the Fenton’s, but also thinks he can’t be, because the Fenton’s already have a son who is very much not dead. True, Phantom has never seen him before, but there’s been enough discussion of the Fenton’s “delinquent son” to get the drift that he’s probably never around. Phantom starts to put the pieces together when he overhears Jazz talking to Sam and Tucker about Danny Fenton, and that she thinks the reason he is absent is because of the portal accident. Phantom realises that this is the accident he died in and works out he’s Fenton’s ghost, but this doesn’t explain why no one has brought up his death or why everyone still refer to him as dead.
To sort things out, Phantom decides to try to talk to Danny Fenton to make sense of this. If he’s referred to as alive, he must be out there somewhere, right? Cue many hours of Phantom trying to find himself.
Meanwhile, Danny decides to try and control his powers, and when he does, he finds that he begins having strange memories of his parents pointing guns at him, being really high in the sky and being surrounded by news reporters. He’s pretty confused.
Phantom has been getting lots of publicity, and Danny doesn’t know what to think about the “good ghost capturing ghosts” because from what Danny sees the town is always infested with ghosts so Phantom mustn’t be a very good hero.
Not able to find (himself) Danny Fenton, Phantom decides to put a note on Danny’s locker so they can talk. Enter one Wes Weston. He’s been suspicious about Danny and his resemblance to Phantom, but this pretty much confirms they have a connection. He steals the note (so Danny never receives it), and begins to confront Danny about how he’s connected to Phantom. Danny denies everything, and in fact is even doubting the existence of Phantom — he’s never seen the ghost before, plus there’s no such thing as a “good ghost”. Danny tells Wes that Phantom doesn’t even exist, and storms off.
Everyone is concerned at the revelation that Danny doesn’t believe Phantom exists. Jazz / his parents ask why, and Danny says he’s never seen Phantom so there’s no proof he exists. Danny leaves and decides to get more control over his powers. For some reason, he has a memory of putting a note on his own locker, despite the fact there was no note on it when he got there, only Wes. He feels gets freaked out at these weird memories, and turns into his ghost half (not knowing).
Phantom is confused as to why he’s in Danny Fenton’s bedroom, and doesn’t find him anywhere. He goes to Jazz to ask where her brother is, because he doesn’t want to Fenton parents to shoot at him. Phantom tells her he’s Fenton’s ghost and needs to talk to her brother, except he has never seen him before. Jazz is shocked / confused, but is almost instantly aware that her brother is Phantom, not just his ghost, but as human too. Jazz manages to calm him down and since he’s not freaked out anymore, Danny detransforms into Phantom. He doesn’t know why he’s suddenly in Jazz’s bedroom. Now Jazz is aware her brother is a ghost and a human.
Danny begins having strange memories of talking to Jazz again and even remembers walking through the wall (which he’d never do, because he doesn’t want anyone to find out about his powers), but this time he can actually hear what is being said. He’s asking Jazz where himself is, which is really odd and weirds him out.
The next day, Wes confronts him, having figured out that Danny and Phantom are one and the same. Cue Wes spreading rumours. Danny says that’s stupid, he can’t be someone who doesn’t exist. When Wes turns away in a huff as no one believes him, Phantom’s note for Danny slips out of his folder. Danny picks it up and realises that Phantom does exist.
That’s all I’ve really gotten up to so far, but overtime, Danny’s ghost half won’t rely purely on instinct because Danny has grasp of his powers so he over time gets more memories from his ghost half. He’ll begin to connect these memories from the things said in them and where they take place as belonging to Phantom, and wonder if the things that Wes says are true. At the end he realises he is Phantom, and knows there must be a way that he transforms into Phantom, and for the first time transforms into Phantom out of his own free will, not ghostly instinct, and because he knows he is Phantom, his memories remain intact. However, it’ll take a lot to adjust to realise he’s been the one who’s protected the town, fought ghosts and the entire time he didn’t even know himself.
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anironsidh · 4 years ago
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Final mood board for @tarredion 's fic for the @oldschoolpbb , scratch bark bite (oh, love me, i lied)
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The quote in the bottom left is from the fic, edited by me. This one fits with the end of the fic, the lovers part of the rivals to lovers thing they've got going on.
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