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pascallatte · 2 years ago

Text

That kind of stuff

Pairing: Pedro Pascal x Actress!reader

Summary: What's going on behind the camera in one of Pedro's interviews.

Date: December 2020

Warnings: talk abt pornstars (iykyk)

A/N: omggg we're in the 20s nowwwww!!! I can't wait for you to read what's coming!!! sorry for posting early the next day, my Wi-Fi's having problems....

Another at-home interview? Why not it’s all people can get nowadays, so better get used to it. Pedro had already set up his area with the Wonder Woman wallpaper behind him. You were seated beside him, doing your own thing when he tapped you on the shoulder, signalling that his interview was starting.

“Hey, guys. Welcome to “Stir Crazy. My guest today is a struggling actor, starring in tiny projects like “The Mandalorian” and “Wonder Woman: 1984.” The host, Josh, enthusiastically opened making you stop what you’re doing in order to watch them.

“I’m here to give him a big break, It’s Pedro Pascal”

Smiling, Pedro raises his arms, “Finally, my big break, Thank you so much” he said sarcastically

“Schmunder woman, nope. Let’s talk about the important stuff, You’re one of the sexiest men alive, You’re one of people magazine’s sexiest men alive,” Josh laughs when Pedro opens up his buttoned-up jacket.

Pedro opens it, superman style, “in plaid, that my girlfriend chose for me today.”

“And he’s got the plaid to prove it,” the host continues after having a good laugh.

“Does this validate you? Did you always know you had this in you?”

“Of course I did, it’s the only time where she gave me sincere compliments than back-handed ones,” he said subtly pointing at you, making the host once again ask. You stood up, making Pedro follow your form, asking where you were going with his eyes. Pointing to your room, he nods focusing back on the interview.

“So the title suggests the setting is 1984. So let’s- ok at the count of three, let’s each of us name our favorite 1980s song”, josh instructed Pedro, as he himself was getting ready to answer.

“You ready?”

“One-“

“Purple Rain,” Pedro immediately said with a straight face. Making the host wheeze, “Wow, I didn’t even, okay. So yeah. That’s it”

They both laugh one in disbelief and one proud of his answer, “End of story.”

“What’s yours?” Pedro prodded, teasing the host. “You’re a kid. You weren’t even born.”

“I’m 97 years old. I was going to go with- I don’t know.” Josh defended himself before stating the obvious answers someone would say if asked about the 80s. “What do you think?”

“I wanna dance with somebody,” Pedro whispers, enclosing his mouth with his hands.”with somebody who…loves…me” he finishes.

“Okay, when you do it like that, just so you know it gets creepy,”

He places a hand on the left side of his face covering his mouth, “blame-,” he points to you with his thumb, who coincidentally emerged out of your room. Shooting him a confused look, you can only shrug, return to your seat, and listen to them again.

Before you can even sit, a thought came into your mind. Nudging Pedro who looked at you for a second, you stand up infant of him. Tilting his head slightly, switching his look from the screen and you. Once you’ve got his attention, you pointed to the espresso machine you guys have, asking if he wanted some. He signals you to wait for a second.

“Is that Tom Selleck?” He said answering the host's question.

“It’s tom selleck, it’s Tom Selleck,” josh’s voice could be heard. “Hold on a minute,” Pedro says turning to look at you.

“Oh, uh ok,” confused, the host can only guess what would happen behind the camera.

Unknown to you, your voices can still be heard in the recording, catching what you guys were talking about. Looking at you, “What was it you were asking?” Pedro asks.

“I was asking if you wanted some coffee, it’s too early in the morning and we haven’t had coffee before this,” you whispered back to him.

“Oh, sure, thank you, amor,” he whispered back, shooting you a grateful smile.

Turning back to the camera, “ I have returned.” Pedro says in a villainous voice.

“I’m sorry, but you- I'm guessing your partner, y/n, can be heard. Is that ok with you or should we cut it out?” Josh says concerned for your privacy, even over the simplest thing.

“Oh, no, no. It’s ok. So where were we,” Pedro bypasses the host concern and drags it back to the mood of the interview.

“Ok..back to it,” josh grabs a paper, showing it to Pedro. “He’s living on a prayer man.”

While Pedro was having his sweet time in the interview, you just stood in the kitchen, staring at the wall, waiting for your coffee to finish. You thought that you’d get something to eat, but that was too noisy, so saving it for later, you chose to sit and wait.

As soon as the coffees ready, you took them walking back to the room you were previously in. Noticing Pedro who was laughing looking a bit flushed. Deciding to take a seat in front of him, you place down his cup then yours. You heard the host mention a name but you didn’t really mind it until you heard Pedro’s answer.

“Porn star,” he said smiling, heat slowly crawling up his cheeks when he sees you staring at him, with an eyebrow raised.

“You knew that too quickly, You knew that really quickly,” you heard josh say pointedly at him, before laughing. You continue to look at him with the same eyebrow raised, drinking your coffee, while Pedro smiled through the silent accusation.

“Are you frozen or are you just enjoying the moment?”

“I’m just enjoying the moment and fighting to avoid my girlfriend's intense stare,” Pedro stated smile still lingering on his face.

“Well, let’s see what your partner thinks of you when you answer these next few questions,” josh teases.

“George Payne?”

“He’s a super hero.”

Shocked Pedro widens his eyes, “No, It’s a pornstar. You got to look that one up,” you heard the interviewer say, making you whip your head from when you were looking at your phone.

“Hector Hammond?”

Drinking the coffee you gave him, “DC,” he says full of confidence.

“Yeah yeah, that’s a green lantern villain, I think Peter Skarsgard played that one.”

“The one with the plants and the flashlights,” Pedro says before bursting out a raspberry at what he’d said. “You sold it well.” The host laughed.

“Black Adam? Porn star or DC character?”

“Dc character.”

Nodding, “that’s dj, that’s the rock,” josh continues

“Buck adams.”

“Pornstar,” pedro says before looking at you expectedly, and of course you were there watching him intently know still with an eyebrow raised.

“I feel like you’ve seen some of buck’s work,”

“I mean we’re writing this down, right? Because-“ the host wheezes out laughing at Pedro’s comment. “That’s the rest of your day.”

“I need to look all of this up, that is if y/- am I allowed to mention her? Can I mention you here?” He asks the host before looking at you. Shrugging at first you turn around to give him a nod drinking your coffee.

“I- yeah sure, if that’s ok with her,” the host assures him.

“Yeah, she’s ok with that. If-if y/n allows me I mean, because she’s been giving me the stare the whole time we were talking about the-these stars,” Pedro said chuckling making the host laugh.

They calmed down after a few seconds, going serious all of a sudden.

“Harold…..Allnut?”

“Harold Walnut?” Pedro asks leaning closer to the camera.

“Harold allnut,” silence ensues staring at each other before laughing out loud, making similar kettle noises.

“I mean, would it matter which one he is?” Your boyfriend asks, face redder than before.

“Oh, I’ll watch his work regardless. What do you think?”

“I’ll watch his work regardless-,” moving his head side to side, pedro quotes him evidently having way too much fun. “-Regardless, I am a fan,” he continues.

“I hope he’s a pornstar-“ you drown out what ever they were saying focusing on the script you were reading. But curious on what had happened you tried to search one of the names you’ve heard from there. At first you thought it wasn’t too bad, but as you scroll down the things and figures you’ve seen has become too much that you shut your laptop of listening back to them.

“-nd then, if I’m going to speak to them in the Mando voice, it’s kind of a, it’s strangely like a bedroom voice, you know?” Pedro says hesitatingly making josh laugh.

You giggle to yourself at that, situating yourself directly next to Pedro.

“Yeah, that’s not appropriate for kids, but I don’t know, can we ask y/n?” Josh once again teases him, making him flush shaking his head.

“Ahh, no, no. that’s not Disney channel inappropriate- your question is...” Pedro says shaking his head “No,” sneaking to take a long glance at you, who he saw was trying your hardest to keep your laugh in.

“Ok, uh. Another challenge for you, let’s play a little game of who am I?”

You saw Vin diesel appear on his part of the screen, making you watch him intently. Also wanting to see how he plays his part.

“Ok so uhm, shave off all of my head, give me a bunch of muscles, and then- and a fast car,” he finishes

“Oh, vin diesel. Easy,” the host exclaims.

The next name shows up, ‘C3PO.’

He does this butchered robotic voice making you cover your mouth to stop noise from flowing out. You can sense that Pedro’s looking at you, based on his reaction after the host had gotten it right.

“I’ve seen “the exorcist” about 117 times-,” he shouts making you jump to turn to look at him, “and it just keeps getting funnier every time I see it,” he continued making you and josh laugh.

Content with the reenactment, “you are beetlejuice, and it seems that not only I was enjoying it but also y/n,” he points out, “we can hear her laughing.”

Nodding, “oh, yeah she’s enjoying this alright,” Pedro tells him smiling widely.

And as the last name pops, you let out a gasp, looking at Pedro who was now laughing loudly. It’s just because coincidentally, or not, your name, rather your character's name, was of course added to the ones he had to describe or act out.

“Aha! This is an easy one, this-to whoever this person is please don’t kill me,” he said still laughing.

“Ok imagine a tiny- tiny agitated person, that rocks the bad ass role despite being….” he looks up thinking of something to describe you. “Oh yo-I’m going to give you this, “Dinos lo que sabes o te meteré esta puta pistola en la garganta y te volaré las entrañas!!” He acts imagining he’s holding a gun downwards. tell us what you know or else I'm gonna shove this fucking gun down your fucking throat and blow your insides out

“I think I should know who this is..” josh says.

“Yeah, I believe you do, that line stayed through out the last two seasons, you know,” he said as a matter of fact. Grin slowly appearing on his face, as he holds back his laughter when he saw you bending over the table red faced.

“Oh I know now, great choice of line by the way.”

Pedro raises his brows expectedly, cupping his ear turning closer to the screen. “It’s Catalina Mendoza, you- Y/n L/n’s character.”

“Bingoooo!!!” Pedro laughs now looking at you with a smile as you shoot him finger guns.

“Okay, okay-so I follow you on the instagram…“ the host continues to introduced their next topic, while you and Pedro talk quietly in order for the video to not record your conversation.

As soon as josh raises the face time picture of Oscar Isaac, you tap Pedro on the shoulder to take a look. He immediately bursted out laughing as he remembered this moment all too well.

“What’s going on here, buddy?”

“There’s our pandemic looks, man. Looking at today.”

“Is oscar Isaac like upside down?”

Guessing they’ll be talking about what had happened for a while, you decided to lay on the couch still kind of listening to the interview in the other room. I mean it’s the pandemic, what else can you do? As an actress, or like an actor in general, you’re always on the move so being at home for the past year had given you the rest you needed. But it didn’t last long really. So here you are now, slowly getting back to normal, kind of quickening up the pace.

Your peace was interrupted when you heard your name being shouted from the other room, curiously, you slowly sat up looking towards their direction. Seeing Pedro beckon you to their side, he pats the chair next to him. Telling the host that you’re there already.

“Ah there she, pedro said that you’d have to share your opinion on this question.”

Looking at your partner, yo just nodded while you waited for the question. “ he said would you rather have me-” he said pertaining to himself, “only dress in 80s clothing or be naked all the time?”

At this point you didn’t want to be seen or heard on camera so you opted on whispering your answer to Pedro, allowing the camera to get a glimpse of your home-clothed figure.

With a smile that grew into a smirk, he laughed at your response before saying a quick “thank you” as you got up.

“Y/- she said she would rather see me dressed in 80s clothing, but it really depends on me,” he said slowly looking at the camera before continuing, “Like can I- if I was naked all the time could I be alone? All the time?” He asked.

“It depends on you-“ the host cut himself off with a laugh when he saw Pedro’s expression. As soon as Pedro gets his response, he looks to the side, to where you were sitting a while ago, with a teasing smirk hinting out his meaning, which as a result makes josh laugh.

“I- do what you do, but you don’t have to live your life man, you just gotta do what you gotta do,” josh says now flushed from all the laughing he’s experienced during the interview.

Pretending to look sad, “I guess I’ll do it in 80s clothing,” Pedro said in a low voice.

“Ok fanny packs all the way, here we go.”

“Only a fanny pack.”

“Would you rather get, “this is the way,” tattooed on your face or on your back?”

“we-,“ motioning to you off-screen,”-had this conversation before and she insisted that I take it on my back, which I- for obvious reason, agree with her.”

“Okay. Yeah. That might limit your roles if you have it on your face,” josh jokes.

“Also, on my back might be a completely different message as well,” Pedro says giving josh a knowing look and a side smile.

Josh, laughs for the millionth time in the last 10 to 15 minutes, “Would you rather be always sweating or always be on the verge of a sneeze?”

Laughing to himself, Pedro’s mins had gone to places before ever answering the host. “oh, there’s kind of something orgasmic about being on the verge of a sneeze all the time- I could maybe- maybe I could get kind of used to that,” he says before acting out what an “orgasmic sneeze,” would ever look like.

“With the tattoo on your back, that’s quite a picture”

“Take it away” grinning to the camera, Pedro looks at you who was now recording him, in which he didn’t notice when.

“Last one, would you rather have a mouthful of bees or one be in your butt?”

“Oh I already have a bee in my butt,” he blows out a laugh. “Yeah, no- a bee in the butt… come one who doesn’t want a bee in the butt?”

“Those are goals.”

“Don’t be knocking it, man.”

Laughing, “I think we learned a lot about each other today. You learned that you’re not quite the porn connoisseur-” josh says making Pedro do a shushing sign with the finger on his mouth.

“- that you thought you were. We learned that you are one of the sexiest man alive-“

“I have work to do,” Pedro says cutting josh off before laughing.

The interview ended a short while after saying their goodbyes and thank you’s. Turning to Pedro who was fixing up his side of the table you gave him a smirk, making him shake his head.

“Soooo,i didn’t know you liked that kind of stuff,” teasingly you say as you cross you arms leaning on the table.

“Mhmm, please don’t bring that up again,” he says before walking to you, pushing you up to sit on the couch instead. In the silence, you both enjoyed your cups of coffee, talking about what to do for the rest of the day.

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