#past wolfstar

[inkyarcturus]

Remus confessing to liking Severus to Harry.

Harry just look at Snape for a long hard minute, then looks at Sirius who is absolutely distraught at losing his ex lover to “Snivellous.”

He looks back at Remus, straight faced.

“God you have a type.”

And just walks away.

[chlobliviate]

Wolfstar Microfics - Recovery

Words: 796

@wolfstarmicrofic

***

TW - mentions of former alcoholism/addiction and being in recovery

***

The wedding had gone off without a hitch. Even Lily’s family seemed to be happy, which for them was nothing short of a miracle. The day had been beautiful, they’d all cried at some point and by the time they sent James and Lily off to their honeymoon suite, almost everyone was ready to call it a night.

“Fancy a walk?” Remus asked, as the last of the wedding guests stumbled upstairs. “I’m not tired yet.” Sirius nodded and they took a side door out of the hotel and followed the path down to the lake. Remus walked ahead and sat at the end of the rickety jetty, Sirius following a moment later.

“I know this is quite possibly the worst time to bring this up,” Sirius started.

“But you’re going to anyway?”

“But I’m going to anyway.” He nodded, “I just wanted to say that I’m so sorry for how things ended with us. I was an absolute monster towards the end and you tried so hard to help me and, yeah, I’m just really sorry, and thank you for trying so hard.”

Remus said nothing for a while, the two of them watched wildlife create ripples on the surface of the lake, and marvelled at the reflection of the moon.

“Lily said you’re sober now.”

“Six years and four months, yesterday.” He smiled.

“Wow, that’s fantastic. I’m so proud of you.” Remus squeezed Sirius’ thigh affectionately out of habit, then froze. “Shit, sorry.”

“It’s fine.” Sirius was glad that it was dark, he knew he was blushing. “It took about two weeks before I realised you weren’t coming back and then, bam, rock bottom.”

“I’m so—”

“Don’t be. I needed the wake up call. If you’d stayed much longer I’d have destroyed us both.” Sirius looked down at the water. “I’m sorry.”

“It was a long time ago.” Remus said slowly. “It sounds like you’re doing really well.”

“There are good and bad days, like anything. Therapy helped a lot.” Sirius shrugged, “Another thing you were right about.”

“I feel like saying ‘I told you so’ is in bad taste.” Remus chanced a look at him and smiled.

“Nah, I deserve at least one, I reckon.” Sirius smiled back at him, taking in the way the moonlight picked out the beginnings of grey near his temples, and made his eyes seem to glow. He willed himself to look away for the sake of his self control.

“Well then. I told you so.” Remus said softly, looking out at the lake.

“Turns out I’d repressed a lot of stuff from being a kid and apparently that’s not good if you want to be a healthy adult. Yes, yes. I know you told me that too.” Remus bit his lip as he grinned and even just seeing the side of it made Sirius want. “I needed to lose you to get myself better, but it’s also the worst thing that ever happened to me.”

“Yeah, that’s pretty much where I’ve been at with it.” Remus leant back on his elbows and looked up at the sky. “I was… miserable. For a long time. But I don’t think I’d be who I am now without that time in my life, you know?”

Sirius mirrored Remus’ movement and stared up at the stars. “Did you find someone?”

“To love?” Sirius nodded, “Nah. I looked for a while, had a few dates here and there, but nobody really interested me. It’s just me and my cat Peaches. What about you?”

“After I got out of self destruction mode, I didn’t date for a couple of years. I was with this guy Ed for a year or so but that fizzled, and it’s just been me for a few years now. I debated getting a cat, but it’s hard work taking care of myself, let alone another living thing.”

“It sounds stupid, but getting a cat made me look after myself more.” Remus chuckles and Sirius feels the sound in his chest. “Like I had someone else to be accountable to for the first time in ages and it made me want to do better.”

“Weirdly, I totally get what you mean.” He paused, “It’s hard to want to do things for yourself sometimes, right?”

“Exactly.” Remus nodded, “She makes sure I’m awake by 7 and making her breakfast by quarter past.”

“Still not a morning person?” Sirius knocked his shoulder into Remus’ gently.

“No,” he knocked Sirius back and laughed, “I go back to bed after feeding her way too often. She tries.” Before he could talk himself out of it, he gently rested his head on Sirius’ shoulder. “Is this ok?”

“Yeah,” Sirius’ voice was barely audible as he leant his cheek on Remus’ hair. “This is ok.”

[moon-meteor-star-sun]

Sirius: Does she make you laugh?

Remus: She doesn’t make me cry.

[starmoonsunseeker]

Chapters: 21/? Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage Relationships: Regulus Black/Remus Lupin, Barty Crouch Jr./Evan Rosier, Regulus Black & Barty Crouch Jr. & Evan Rosier Additional Tags: Post-Sirius Black's Prank on Severus Snape, Past Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, Sirius Black Bashing, James Potter Bashing, POV Remus Lupin, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Minor Character Death, Albus Dumbledore Bashing, The prank happened 6th year, Hogwarts House Sorting, Resorting, Dark Remus Lupin, Werewolf Mates, Original Spells and Potions (Harry Potter), Lust Potion/Spell, Non-Consensual Love Potion Use (Harry Potter), More tags to be added, Marlene McKinnon bashing, Barty Crouch Jr. is a Little Shit, Bisexual Evan Rosier, Bisexual Sirius Black, Gay Remus Lupin, Past Infidelity, Past Relationship(s), Found Family, Families of Choice, The Dark Arts (Harry Potter), Crucio | Cruciatus Curse (Harry Potter), Pining Remus Lupin, Racist Language, I mean they are death eaters, Young Death Eaters Summary:

After the prank, Remus breaks up with Sirius because what is love without trust. He is taken in by the snakes and is surprised at how accepted he feels there.

[realitybitesyouknowit]

Chapters: 31/31 Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Mature Warnings: Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con Relationships: Theodore Nott/Harry Potter, Harry Potter/Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy & Theodore Nott & Harry Potter & Blaise Zabini, Harry Potter & Blaise Zabini, Draco Malfoy & Harry Potter Characters: Harry Potter, Severus Snape, Theodore Nott, Blaise Zabini, Draco Malfoy, Regulus Black, Sirius Black, Gregory Goyle, Vincent Crabbe, Lucius Malfoy, Narcissa Black Malfoy, Tom Riddle | Voldemort Additional Tags: Good Slytherins, Good Severus Snape, Slytherin Harry Potter, Meddling Albus Dumbledore, Touch-Starved Harry Potter, Soul Bond, Platonic Relationships, Heartbreak, Past Abuse, Angst, Self-Harm, Found Family Series: Part 1 of A Trolley Wheel Summary:

The Butterfly Effect: The idea that the altering of even the smallest most minuscule seemly inconsequential events can alter the entire outcome of not only one but all.

If that wobbly wheel had held for a few more seconds Harry wouldn’t have heard, “everywhere else is full” come from a dark skinned boy with violet eyes and a flirty smile but instead a pale freckled boy with dirt across his nose. He wouldn’t have spilt sweets with a quiet girl with soft brown hair and a nervous shake to her voice, but with a boy and his rat.

That one faulty wheel altered Harry’s life and the wizarding world as a whole in an unrecognizable way.

[mkaugust]

@wolfstarmicrofic prompt dark 1/21

Sirius watched the world turn dark, shadows slip over Remus' face. Wanting to see Re's eyes become pinpricks of light, he gently exhaled to startle him awake.

Remus blinked awake, certain he felt the warmth of another body close by. His eyes searched the dark, coming up empty. Yet again.

[hpcanonfirehp]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks Characters: Remus Lupin, Nymphadora Tonks Additional Tags: Past Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, Hurt/Comfort, Metamorphmagus, Metamorphmagus Sex, Angst, Anal, Vaginal Fingering, Cunnilingus, Out of Body Experiences, Genderbending, Genderfluid Character, Gender or Sex Swap, Vaginal Sex, Bisexual Remus Lupin, Remus Lupin Needs a Hug, past wolfstar - Freeform, Post-Battle of the Department of Mysteries (Harry Potter), Not Beta Read Summary:

It's a habit. One born out of the longing to feel loved and needed and desired. It's a habit that grows into something that neither of them can define, nor manage. It's a shade of gray, but definitely not black.

-

Or

-

Tonks is capable of giving Remus the face and body he needs to fall into his favorite escape. Sirius Black.

[moonyswarmsweaters]

James only ever thought of rethinking his relationship with Regulus once and it was the say he properly met Evan and Barty

not because they scared him or anything (they did, but it wasn’t the reason)

It was because Regulus said they weren’t dating and James wasn’t sure he could take another wolfstar level pre-dating pinning stage.

[ellecdc]

Hiii :) I saw your requests tips and saw that you didn't write for dub/non con and I don't know if this count as one so just feel free to not respond!

So reader is in a relationship with the Marauders and is starting to randomly think about a past SA and realise this was SA only now bc her brain has been blocking the memory and information. She tells the boys (and maybe Barty idk) about it after sometime of overthinking it and self blaming so it's just like super fluff at the end <3

(it's my personal experience but if you don't feel comfortable writing about it just feel free to ignore it :). Sorry for the bad orthograph english isn't my first language 🫶🏻)

first of all - your English is fucking fantastic (and you know more words than I do - I had to look up what an orthograph was) secondly, I turned this into more of a conversation between reader and her ship. and for plot purposes this became poly!wolfstar - hope that's okay!

poly!wolfstar x fem!reader who opens up about past SA

CW: discusses themes of sexual consent, inebriation, and SA. Describes past SA and abusive relationships. Describes drunkeness, alcohol, and drinking. viewer discretion is advised.

You could tell it was taking Sirius a lot of effort to appear to be too fussed over Lily, James, and Regulus at the end of the party, but he pretended to gag every time anything even remotely romantic or sexual was brought up about his brother.

“What do you think happens when they go home, Pads?” Remus muttered quietly, causing Sirius to slap his hands against his ears.

“Would you shut up, Moons? I am not interested in hearing about my brother’s sexual habits, thank you.”

Unfortunately for Sirius, Lily didn’t get the memo. 

“Are we le-leaving!?” She shrieked through a hiccup as James held most of her weight up against his side and Regulus gathered her purse and shoes she’d since lost.

“Yes sweets; we’re gonna get you to bed.” James said quietly.

A salacious smirk took over Lily’s face as she tried (and failed) to grab James by the chin. “To bed, hm?”

Regulus snorted, though no one missed the blush that dusted his cheeks. “To sleep, Lils.”

Lily groaned dramatically and seemed to go ‘no bones’ in James' grip as he grunted and tried to keep her from hitting the ground. “Why not.”

“Because you smell like you bathed in a bottle of schnapps, sweetheart.” James placated.

“So?” Lily grumbled though acquiesced to helping James keep her up right. “We can even do that thing you like.” She tried to sing sensually, but her efforts were in vain as every other word came out slurred. 

Sirius grumbled causing James to blush. 

“Not tonight, angel. We’ll cuddle, okay?”

Lily scoffed and turned her sights onto Regulus. “You agree with me, right? Right Reggie? You agree- you agree with me?”

“Almost always.” Regulus agreed quickly, offering Lily his arm as to share her weight with James. “Just not tonight, my love.”

“You guys are no fun.” Lily whined as she allowed her two boyfriends to usher her out of Remus and Sirius’ shared flat.

Unfortunately for Sirius, no one missed Regulus leaning into Lily’s hair and promising that “they’d have lots of fun tomorrow to make up for it.”

“I hate them all.” Sirius grumbled with no real malice as he stood and made his way over to you before offering you both of his hands. “What do you say, dollface? Ready for bed too?”

Remus answered ‘yes’ as you accepted Sirius’ help up which sparked a debate between the two of them whether or not Remus could be considered ‘dollface’ to which you secretly agreed that yes he could but ultimately refused to participate in such nonsense.

You got ready for bed in a haze as you replayed Regulus, James, and Lily’s conversation in your head. You weren’t sure what exactly you were so stuck on, but something about the exchange caused something deep within your gut to churn unpleasantly. 

“You feeling alright, dovey?” Remus asked gently, pressing a kiss to your hairline as you reentered their bedroom after washing your face, carrying your toiletries with you so as not to hog the bathroom.

Sirius (and Remus) had been begging you to spend your nights here with them nearly since the very beginning of your relationship, but you argued that you did not want to pay rent for a flat you never saw. 

He then started nagging you to give up the lease on your flat and just “sodding move in with them already”, but it still felt a little too fresh for that.

So, you spent most nights (but not all) at their flat; living out of duffle bags and toiletry bags.

You hummed in confirmation to Remus’ question, moving towards the mirror above Sirius’ dresser to finish your skincare routine as Remus took his turn with the washroom.

“You sure, sweetness? You’ve been awfully quiet tonight; did you have fun?” Sirius continued as he went digging through what you knew to be Remus’ drawers searching for Sirius’ favourite shirt which was really Remus’ shirt but no one bothered to argue with the black-haired boy…anymore.

“I had fun.” You agreed, massaging product into your face.

“Uh huh.” Sirius commented, not sounding at all convinced as he came up behind you and hooked his chin over your shoulder; watching as you completed your nightly routine through the mirror. “You had so much fun and that’s why you look like Moony when he can’t figure out one of those crosswords in the Daily Prophet?”

You chuckled softly, but something in your lack of enthusiasm (or your lack of disdain) for his joke seemed to tip him off. 

“What’s going on in here, hm?” He asked as he pressed a kiss to your temple. 

“I just…” You started, sighing as you made yourself busy by tidying up your belongings and refusing to make eye contact with him. “I’ve just been thinking about Reg, James, and Lily’s conversation.”

That caused a dramatic groan to rip through Sirius’ chest as he leaned his forehead against your shoulder.

“What now?” Remus asked jokingly as he returned from the washroom. 

“She’s thinking about Regulus, James, and Lily in bed.” Sirius accused; voice muffled in the fabric of your sleepwear. 

You scoffed defensively, claiming you were “absolutely not” at the same time Remus commented “aren’t we all” which started a very loud bickering match between your two boyfriends. 

The arguing only ceased when Remus “swore on his mother’s life” that Sirius was “by far the superior Black brother.” 

Placated, Sirius turned his sights back to you as you sat on the edge of the bed. “So, what were you really thinking about their conversation?”

Remus, having walked in with only enough time to rile Sirius up, popped his head up at that. “Everything alright, dove?”

You sighed as you turned to face them. “I was just confused, I guess.” You admitted. “I think…Lily was hoping to have sex tonight?”

Sirius groaned again which earned him a swat from Remus who seemed to pick up on some of the tension radiating through your body.

“Yes…I’d agree.” Remus responded carefully.

“And Reg and James said no?”

Sirius’ head tilted at that as he considered you with furrowed brows. “Well, of course, doll. She was drunk.” He said simply, as if that explained it all. 

“So…they wouldn’t have sex with her because she was drunk?” You clarified.

The boys shared a glance with one another before they each took a seat on the bed, prompting you to turn your body so you were all facing each other.

“So, all parties have to be able to consent, right?” Remus started. 

You nodded quickly at that. 

“But when one party is inebriated or under the influence, they can’t consent.” Sirius continued.

You felt your eyebrows twitch as you looked down at the pattern on your bed spread. “Even though she was asking?”

“She wasn’t in her right mind, dove.” Remus explained gently; eyes full of compassion and, perhaps, some sadness. “She may have woken up tomorrow and not remembered anything, or perhaps worse, regretted something. It’s Regulus and James’ jobs to keep her safe, just like I’m sure she keeps them safe when the roles are reversed.”

And now you could understand why their conversation seemed to catch you so off guard. 

“You’re so pretty like this; drunk and all mine.”

“Have a few more; we always have more fun when you let loose.”

“But…I’m really tired.” “All you’ve got to do is lay there - I’ll do all the work.”

“You don’t remember last night? That’s too bad; I won’t be forgetting that any time soon.”

“You’re such a good little whore for me when you’ve had a few too many.” 

You hadn’t realised you had zoned out of the conversation until Sirius was leaning into your field of vision. “You okay, sweets?”

“Yeah.” You said breathlessly before clearing your throat. “No, sorry. I’m fine.”

“Why were you asking?” Remus queried; tone hardening slightly, alerting you to the fact that he smelled trouble. 

“I was just wondering.” You fibbed.

“You know we would do the same, right?” Sirius asked earnestly. “That we have done the same for you.”

“You have?”

“Yes, my love.” Remus whispered. “Always.”

You nodded and looked back down at the bedspread. “Okay.”

“Y/N.” Sirius called with a certain level of severity; though you detected no anger or frustration in his tone. “Why were you asking?” He repeated Remus’ earlier question after your gaze met his imploring silver eyes. 

You quickly looked down at your hands as you began picking at the hangnails around your fingers. “I was just confused; that has not always been my experience.” You admitted quietly; shame coursing through your body as you digested this new information.

The room was quiet for a moment as Remus shuffled scrupulously closer to you. “No?” He whispered; voice intoned with a level of gentleness you weren’t accustomed to hearing. 

You began to feel all sorts of discomfort at the heavy attention being focused on you in the room. “It was usually quite the opposite.” You joked; voice rising to a higher octave in an attempt to make light of the situation as you pulled back the covers and made to retreat to the relative safety of the boys’ bed. 

“Whoa, whoa. What does that mean?” Sirius implored, earning him a gentle warning “Pads” from Remus.

“I’m sorry.” You placated, still uncomfortable with this heavy atmosphere you seem to have blanketed over what had been a really nice evening. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“No, I-” Sirius began, cutting himself off and taking a breath you could tell was an attempt to calm himself down. He shuffled closer to you and wrapped his hand around one of your ankles through the blanket as he rubbed soothing circles against it. “You can always talk about anything with us; it’s important that we talk about these things, yeah?”

“Only if you’re comfortable, of course.” Remus mollified. “But I do agree with Sirius; if you’re comfortable, I think it’s good for us to talk about these things.” 

“It was just my last relationship.” You admitted finally. “He didn’t…agree - with the consent thing, that is.”

Remus’ lips pursed as Sirius’ jaw tightened. 

“He’d sleep with you when you were drunk?” Remus asked cautiously. 

“Yeah.” You agreed half-heartedly, picking at your nail beds. “Or encourage me to drink more so…”

Remus let out a sigh and you could tell Sirius was fighting back the urge to grumble. 

“I’m sorry,” You offered again. “I really didn’t mean to bring all this up, I just-”

“I really, really don’t want you to apologise anymore.” Sirius nearly begged. 

“I don’t understand how someone could do that.” Remus mused aloud. “To anyone; and someone they claimed to love?”

You mistook Remus’ rhetorical question for an actual need for clarification. “He said I was more fun; that I’d try things I wouldn’t normally.”

Sirius did finally let out an angry huff and his fingers stilled on your ankle. “Who?”

“You don’t know him.” You countered quickly, bringing your knees up to your chest and wrapping your arms around them as you rested your chin on your knees. 

“Lucky him.” Sirius muttered darkly as Remus shifted closer to you. 

“I’m sorry dove.” He offered quietly; holding out his hand to you in a silent invitation. You accepted it, and as you gave him your hand, he gently encouraged you over to him until you were cradled in his arms.

“I didn’t tell you to be sorry.” You murmured quietly as Remus began pressing kisses to the raw and reddened skin around your fingers you hadn’t realised you had nearly shredded in your tension. 

“I know you didn’t.” He whispered. “I’m still sorry, anyhow.”

“I think it’s nice… that the boys were looking after Lily.”

Remus hummed in agreement though he still looked particularly disturbed.  

“That’s their job.” Sirius supplied, causing you and Remus to turn your heads towards your boyfriend whose eyes were red and shining with unshed tears.

“Sirius.” You murmured miserably.

“Just like it’s our job to look after you.” He continued as if you hadn’t said anything at all.

“And you do.” You agreed.

Sirius huffed and wiped at his face. “I hate to think of you being hurt or…or taken advantage of when I wasn’t there to help you.”

Remus made a pitiful sound at that. 

“You didn’t even know me then, Siri.” You offered, half teasing and half placating. 

“She’s alright, Sirius.” Remus comforted. “She’s got us. You’ll be okay now, yeah?”

And you thought of your boys now; you thought of Sirius near tears thinking of someone taking advantage of you during a time you hadn’t even known him, you thought of Remus currently cradling you like you were a precious thing he feared losing if he didn’t hold you with the utmost care, and you thought of their friends - the kind of people who they surrounded themselves with and had the same morals as they did.

Yeah…you think you might just be okay now.

[nightoftheldead]

he is THE dad moms try to impress during kindergarten pick up (since reggie does most of the drop offs lol) harry is an amazing older brother ! (of two actually, still working on the marylily one)

anyways meet mia! my jegulus fanchild bc why the f not :]

[waxingrunes]

Happy Birthday Moony 🌙

See his treat below the cut.

Inspired by an anon request for baby girl Sirius and too-big Moony. What better way for Remus to spend his birthday than with his baby.

[imsiriuslyreading]

people are being awful so here is an inexhaustive list of 50ish of my favourite fanfictions ever in no particular order. most of them have changed my life in some way shape or form and i am eternally grateful and in awe: <3 xo

Wolfstar:

All The Young Dudes mskingbean89

Blends rvltn909

Sweater Weather lumosinlove

Dear Your Holiness mollymarymarie

The Cadence of Part Time Poets Motswolo

Honey if I'm not BrigidFaye

There's your trouble xxxnoimsiriusxxx

If You're Gonna BrigidFaye

Currents lunchbucket

Liebestrum lunchbucket

The Road Not Taken mollymarymarie

Bird Set Free mollymarymarie

Ever Thus WrappedUp

Just What the Doctor Ordered WrappedUp

wading in waist-high water colgatebluemintygel

Disarm You With A Smile five_ht

10 Reasons to Go to Michigan greyeyedmonster18

Nothing Sweeter than my baby DamageControl

Not another band AU thelovelyzee

A Black Mass Over Highway Ninety Greenvlvetcouch

Solntse lumosinlove

We Can Be Heroes youblitheringidiot

Like Real People Do Third_Crow

Beneath A Big Blue Sky Eyra

A Brief History of Dragons Eyra

The Birthday Boy greenvlvetcouch

The Killing Time (unwillingly mine) epicblueblanket

Till We Have Arrived Home Again prouvairing

The Players Secret WrappedUp

Let's Play Pretend msalexwp

Jegulus

Only The Brave Solmussa

You Signed Up For This Solmussa

Kill Your Darlings Messermoon (this counts for wolfstar and rosekiller too!)

Blue and Yellow Skies Alarainai

Drarry

What We Pretend We Can't See gyzym

Everybody Hates A Tourist wolfpants

Running on Air eleventy7

Terrible People wolfpants

Way Down We Go xiaq

Draco Malfoy and The Mirror of Ecidyrue starbrigid

Dramione

Measure of A Man inadaze22

Remain Nameless heyjude19

selfxconclusion spicyxpisces

Beginning and End mightbewriting

How to Win Friends and Influence People OlivieBlake

Draco Malfoy and the Mortifying Ordeal of Being in Love isthisselfcare

Jily

Shelf Awareness ghostofbambi

Room Service ClaudiaWrites

MISC

A Dress With Pockets PacificRimbaud

The Audacity of Lavender Brown malpal132

Devil's Snare All The Way Down malpal132

[chlobliviate]

Wolfstar Microfics - Hurt/No Comfort

Words: 903

@wolfstarmicrofic

***

TW - mention of suicide, declining mental health

***

“I came as soon as I heard. How’s he doing?” Remus shrugged off his coat and hung it on what used to be ‘his hook’, shivering as he adjusted to the weather in the UK.

James paused, taking him in. “He’s not great, honestly.” He pulled Remus into a hug, “We’ve missed you so much.”

“I missed you too, I never should have gone.” Remus wrapped his arms around James. “I should have stayed. Maybe then—”

“You can’t do that.” James pulled away from him and looked at him sternly. “I will not have you taking any kind of responsibility for this. Understand?”

Remus nodded, “Yeah, thanks.”

“How was your trip?” James led him into the kitchen, where there was already a cup of tea waiting for him.

“Grim.” Remus sat at the table and took a sip of the tea, “Fuck, that’s good. Thank you.”

“I don’t know how much Lily told you.” James leant against the counter.

“She told me that he went to Walburga’s funeral alone.” Remus frowned.

“Moony, he insisted. Do you think I just let him?” James said, defensively. “We were parked just outside the church the whole time.”

“Sorry.” Remus covered his eyes and groaned. “I just feel like I should have been there.”

“That’s possibly the only way it could have gone worse for him.” James chuckled, “Hi, remember me, oh, and here’s my half-blood, werewolf boyfriend.”

“Ex-boyfriend.” Remus said quietly.

“Shit, of course, sorry.”

They remained in silence for a while, until Lily came downstairs. She flew at Remus, tears already streaming down her face.

“You’re here.” She breathed, “I didn’t know if you’d come.”

“I left as soon as you hung up.” He rubbed her back as he looked at James over the top of her head. “You need to tell me what happened.”

Lily moved away, wiping her eyes, to stand next to her husband. “He won’t talk to us.”

“You think he’ll talk to me?” Remus scoffed.

“We think it’s better to try than just let him spiral even more,” James said. “He’s been spiralling for… a while. Then Walburga dying stirred up a whole other bunch of confusing shit for him, and then Reg. I don’t think anyone could have prepared him for that.”

“Reg?” Remus looked confused.

“You didn’t tell him about Reg?” James looked down at Lily.

“No.” Lily shook her head, "I didn't-"

“What happened with Reg?”

“He’s dead.” James spat. “He died the day after his mother’s funeral. Left a note, blaming Sirius for every bad thing in his life. It was honestly the worst thing I’ve ever seen.”

Remus sat down again. “No. No, he can’t be.”

“I’m sorry, I know you were close at one point.”

“How?”

“He drowned.” Lily shook her head. “In the pond in the garden at Grimmauld Place.”

“Drowned? He’s scared of water, why would he…” Remus looked broken. “What did he say in the note?”

“He wished Sirius had never been born, as far as he was concerned he had no brother, a load of homophobic shit that sounded just like Walburga. He ended it with something like ‘I wanted to know that this is all your fault, and it always has been’.” Remus' mouth dropped open involuntarily and he stared at the floor, tracing the faded pattern on the tiles with his eyes.

“I hate to ask.” Remus mumbled after a while, “I feel like... Are we absolutely sure that Reg wrote that?”

“What do you mean?”

“It doesn’t make sense to me. Reg spouting a load of homophobic stuff before drowning himself. That’s the most out-of-character shit I’ve heard.” Remus looked up at them, “The kid was gay and scared of water.”

“He was gay?” James’ jaw dropped.

Remus chuckled sadly, “Yeah, he had a thing for you for ages. Last I heard he was living with Rosier? But that was a while back, six months maybe.”

“Remus, what are you saying?”

“It doesn’t add up.” He closed his eyes. “I know I’ve been gone for two years, but this doesn’t make sense with the Reg that I knew. Were they still in contact?”

“That’s the thing. Yes.” Lily frowned, “Sirius showed me texts from the day of the funeral and they seemed to be close again.”

James looked physically unwell, “So what are we saying? Someone killed Reg and staged it as a suicide, and what? Hoped to do the same with Pads? Who would do that?”

“At least half of their family,” Remus said. “Maybe I’m wrong, but—”

“I don’t think you are,” Lily said quickly. “And not just because I want you to be right. Something hasn’t sat right with me since Walburga died.”

“So what do we do?” Remus asked.

“You fuck off back to New Zealand, that’s what you do.” They all spun around to see Sirius looming in the doorway. He was incredibly pale, his hair pulled back and greasy and Remus noted that what used to be a tight t shirt was now hanging off him. His bloodshot eyes blazed. “Why are you here?”

“We invited him,” James said calmly. “We thought he could—”

“I don’t want him here.” Sirius spat, then turned to Remus. “I don’t want you here.”

“Pads.” Remus stood up and Sirius shrank away from them. “Sirius.”

“Get out!” Sirius stormed back upstairs, “Fuck off just like you did last time.”

“I should probably go?” Remus looked at his friends, but couldn’t quite bring himself to make eye contact. “I’ll go.”

[mourningliliesmorningglories]

THINKING UNBELIEVABLE THOUGHTS OF A DRARRY POA FIC WHERE REGULUS FAKES HIS DEATH IN THE CAVE, ONLY NARCISSA KNOWS, AND HE RETURNS TO HOGWARTS TO HUNT THE LAST HORCRUX AKA HARRY AND NARCISSA HAS TO ENLIST DRACO’S HELP TO KEEP HARRY SAFE.

aka Remus lost Sirius once, can’t believe the map twice and will not mediate a Black Brothers reunion a third time.

[neege]

Thinking about year 2 r j lupin writing <3 Mr. Remus Black<3 in his diary. Thinking about him staring at Sirius in class and getting distracted, him dramatically sighing whenever Sirius does something so handsome! Thinking about Remus having a massive schoolboy crush on his kinda new friend and that crush never really going away <3

I also can't decide if I enjoy the thought of Sirius never having a single clue, or if I like a Sirius who definitely knows (he saw his diary) but is a little uncomfortable/annoyed even by his new friend having such dumb feelings, only to then come back around by 7th year or even after Hogwarts.

[realitybitesyouknowit]

Chapters: 37/37 Fandom: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling Rating: Not Rated Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Relationships: Hedwig & Harry Potter, Sirius Black & Harry Potter, Harry Potter & Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger & Harry Potter, Hermione Granger & Harry Potter & Ron Weasley, Walburga Black & Kreacher, Theodore Nott & Harry Potter, Theodore Nott/Harry Potter, Neville Longbottom & Harry Potter, Luna Lovegood & Harry Potter Characters: Harry Potter, Hedwig (Harry Potter), Sirius Black, Hermione Granger, Ron Weasley, Albus Dumbledore, minor OCs, Portrait Walburga Black, Kreacher (Harry Potter), Bathilda Bagshot, Theodore Nott, Winky | Crouch Family House-Elf, Dobby (Harry Potter), Gellert Grindelwald Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Rituals, Study of Ancient Runes (Harry Potter), Arithmancy (Harry Potter), Morally Grey Harry Potter, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black, The actual house, The Dark Arts (Harry Potter), Harry Potter is a Little Shit, Retelling, Past Sirius Black/Remus Lupin, Canon Rewrite, Torture, Animal Sacrifice Series: Part 1 of There Is Hope For Us Summary:

After two years of murder attempts and terrible summers, ominous letters from the Ministry and adults who act like they care but never actually do anything, Harry decides to grab the basilisk by the horns. In the few weeks he has before school begins, Harry learns more about himself, his family, and his role in the magical world. When third year starts, he just hopes he's ready.

[A canon retelling starting in PoA through DH, with a Harry that's just a bit more perceptive, a Sirius with changed priorities, and a caring Theo]