#part 8 was on its last arc by the time i caught up

[violentlydefending]

i love getting into things when they're about to end it's perfect. least amount of waiting for new stuff until completion but also getting to join in on the excitement of finales as they come it's great

[deadwriter16]

Who are your top 7 favorite ships ever (can be canon or non canon) from any media? Why do you love them? Thanks 🌻

Also, random, but is there a story behind your name "deadwriter16"?

Hi anon!! Yall are seriously asking me such hard questions omggg but I will try my best! I am definitely forgetting ships but I'm just gonna write down seven ships that I love in no particular order!

also: there will likely be some spoilers ahead for some of these pieces of media so tread carefully. i'll tag all the shows below too :)

bkdk (bakugo and deku, bnha) - of course. i will always and forever love them. they mean so much to me and they are soulmates to me no matter what anybody else says. i mean just look at my ao3. its proof that they are soulmates fr. anyway id say i love them because i always really related to bakugou, especially before i left for college, and i thought that his and deku's love for each other was really beautiful. they will always have a special place in my heart

kyoru (kyo and tohru, fruits basket) - they made me believe in heterosexuality again lowkey. these two will also always have a special place in my heart. i'm a huge sucker for that selfless sweetheart character being selfish just for that one like angry dude who they picked out of the rain and claimed as theirs, (see: bkdk), and kyoru is like the best manifestation of that trope. they have permanently altered my brain chemistry and cured my depression

cece and schmidt (new girl) - idk if they have a ship name. these two. what is there to say about these two. so so much. their arc and their love story means absolutely everything to me. especially seeing a fellow indian woman get her happiness made me so happy, and both of their character development leading to them falling in love with each other,,, my favorite episodes in new girl are their episodes. they are THE love story. i want what they have

coliver (connor and oliver, htgawm) - these two also mean so so much to me. how to get away with murder is one of my comfort shows, which i know is a super weird thing to say, and ive always loved coliver. theyre both fucked up people, but they love each other and i personally LOVE the story and ending they got. their wedding episode is such a good episode and honestly i think i just love them because something about them is really real, even through all the hardship and toxicity and jail time, there's still love

mondler (monica and chandler, friends) - had they gotten together in season one they wouldve been UNSTOPPABLE. they are the friends to lovers blueprint and everything about them makes me smile. s5 is my favorite season of friends for a reason. their story is so important to me because they just like...kinda always loved each other? whether as friends or more there was just always love there, and it manifested itself in different ways but it was always there. best friends to lovers is my favorite thing ever and they are it !!!

maddie & chim (911) - yes yes i know buddie is fantastic and all but maddie and chim are my favorite simply because i love chimney with everything i am and i want him to have what he wants. also their baby is really cute. shout out jee yun. also also they've been through so much together and apart, and although i have my grievances with how some parts of their relationship was handled in the show, i will always love those two. no matter what, their love for each other always shows and shines and i just love them. also i am not caught up with the season 8 so nobody tell me anything

claire and phil (modern family) - i think these two were the first couple to make me believe that marriages can actually last. i thought, if these two polar opposites could survive all this time, then maybe there's a little hope for all of us. i love their different ways of showing love and how they can stay strong even through fights, and they are definitely my favorite modern family couple. people are always trying to talk about their toxic aspects but tbh that just makes them more real as a couple. and they still love each other throughout it all, even though they're both a little insane

honorable mention: jessica and louis (fresh off the boat), not done with the show yet but im on season 3 and any interaction between them makes me giggle and kick my feet. i wouldve put them on this list but since i havent finished the show i dont think i can compleyely speak on them yet. but as of rn i love them dearly and they are icons

also A.P. bio mention for jack and lynette bc they NEVER SHOULDVE BROKEN UP and then the SHOW GOT CANCELED and now ill NEVER KNOW IF THEY GET BACK TOGETHER but in my heart they did. glenn howerton tell me what was supposed to happen PLEASE

as for deadwriter 16,,, there's no story. when i was young and first coming up with this username i was just kinda like what do i associate myself? and back then i was a bit of a oooh death and darkness kinda person (see: my early works. generally very dark). so i anyway i was like ok ill do dead. keep in mind i was fourteen. and then writer came from the fact that i am a writer. and 16 is my birthday. hence deadwriter16!

this took me a while but thank u so much for the ask anon!!! i forgot how fun asks are lol bc now im so bad at answering them. life gets in the way i guess. anyway thanks again!

[orpheusilver]

care to elaborate on the miles venom arc?

YES okay so. the thing abt the symbiote is that (like any good corruption arc) it feeds on and amplifies the worst traits of a character, which is pretty straightforward in peters case - his biggest issue is his anger, usually manifesting via retribution (eg. "i missed the part where thats my problem", hunting down uncle bens killer), so his origin story is always the great power/great responsibility thing so he learns to temper that rage. what the symbiote does, practically, is force him to unlearn that foundational character arc and regress to his worst self

since the symbiote really really loves aggression peter parker is literally its dream guy but miles is a little more complex. hes definitely susceptible to that same anger (eg. wanting to "make kingpin pay", the entire sm2 martin li arc) but not as often and nowhere near as hardcore, so the peter playbook wont work as well for him (and also it would be fucking boring. weve seen that shit like 8 times already (not saying symbiote peter is boring i just think modern iterations need to explore new aspects to avoid treading the same ground constantly (sm2 does this very fucking well (also yuri lowenthal is a great va for peter like right up there with josh keaton (i think this many parentheses means im off topic (the adhd demon got me))))))

SO. whats miles' major issue he needs to overcome in his origin story? full disclosure i have not read the comics (but i heard they had some issues with his initial characterization anyway? which is fair enough tbh writing the successor to such an iconic guy is Fucking Hard) so TO ME PERSONALLY!! spider-verse miles is the definitive iteration of the guy and like. we all remember the whats up danger scene, his origin arc is overcoming self-doubt and learning to believe in himself ("its a leap of faith", "youre on your way, just keep going") which, alongside social anxiety (eg. the itsv "everyone knows" scene, sm2 "are you mad at me? it sounds like youre mad at me" dialog), seems to be part of some general anxiety issues. this is pretty well supported by the recent "the spider within" short film (which funnily enough is very fucking reminiscent of some sequences in kravens last hunt, not relevant but kinda cool) which also shows how miles responds by self-isolating, similarly to ps5 miles when peter ignores him

the symbiote can exploit his self-doubt pretty easily, the inherent power boost will do most of the heavy lifting to make him feel like hes not good enough without it - what if he runs out of web at the worst moment? what if hes not strong or fast enough to save someone? what if hes caught mid-costume change because hes so used to the suit changing itself? the more valid the (inital) concerns the better imo

the social anxiety is a tricky one but i think if miles traps himself in a doom loop of self-isolation he might spiral into genuine paranoia, which combined w/ the patented symbiote rage could lead him to lash out at people around him. "everyone secretly hates me so im gonna avoid being around people" -> "i feel alienated from everyone i know so im gonna avoid them even harder" -> "am i 'okay'? why would you care? what are you playing at? fuck off and leave me alone" -> "nobody wants to interact w/ me so everyone who does must have ulterior motives and is therefore a threat to me/my family/my city" -> "im completely isolated but bad things are still happening so people must be conspiring against me w/o my knowledge" -> "literally everyone on earth is out to get me and i need to fight them about it"

from there i think the ideal conclusion is pretty self-evident - miles takes a metaphorical leap of faith (calling back to the lesson learned in his origin arc) by actively choosing to trust someone, reach out and ask for help w/ removing the symbiote and dealing with the contemporary big bad (potentially his local peter variant bc hes got experience w/ symbiote removal and it would tie into the "leap of faith" motif but idk)

so tldr: a miles symbiote arc would be different to peters arcs in some (very interesting) key ways - rather than unbridled aggression he could be characterized by intense anxiety, manifesting as paranoid self-isolation and a sense of dependence on the symbiote suit, and would end the arc by reaching out for help in a symbolic leap of faith

[metalandmagi]

Hi....If you don't mind, can I ask, what are your top 10 (or top 7) favorite media (can be books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series)? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before......Thanks....

Not exactly a top 10, just 10 things I like. In no particular order:

1 Captive Prince: Favorite trilogy of all time. Best enemies to lovers romance out there and such well written characters with a perfect example of an unreliable narrator. I'm ruined for this trope forever.

2 Death Note: My first anime that I was utterly obsessed with, so it will always have a place in my heart. It was the first piece of media I saw that focused on a morally corrupt character. I love a good cat and mouse game, but ironically, I think I'm the only person who doesn't really ship L and Light. And when I say I love Death Note, that means the last half too!

3 Fruits Basket: An anime I didn't appreciate until I was older. I love its messages about dealing with loss and loneliness, and it's got a good blend of humor and drama with insane family dynamics. I love the family drama!

4 Vinland Saga: SUCH. GOOD. CHARACTER. DEVELOPMENT! I love it because it's a story that feels big and small at the same time, like massive events are put in motion but it's all because of the relationships between the characters. It has an interesting lesson about the nature of humans and how we're influenced by who raised us (without necessarily glorifying the Vikings)

5 To Your Eternity: I have to say, it's really only my favorite up to the Renril War arc (I'm caught up on the manga, and let's just say I think it should have stopped after that). My favorite take on immortality I've ever seen, with such a well written main character. The story really grabs you by the throat from the very start.

6 Undertale and Deltarune: My favorite story driven games. I just like all the different story lines, the humor, the character designs, and all the fun hidden secrets.

7 Treasure Planet: My favorite movie. No, not just my favorite Disney movie. My favorite movie of all time. Pirates in space! A good flawed main character who doesn't end up with a romantic interest! Great music and animation! Funny as hell!

8 Six of Crows (duology): I love a good heist, and this one is top notch. Fantastic characters with a solid found family dynamic, A+ worldbuilding, super funny, and deals with trauma well. And they were the best part of the Shadow and Bone series.

9 The Song of Achilles: Perfectly written friends to lovers. And I love seeing the rise and fall of Achilles as a character that seems so human and so inhuman at the same time.

10 Haikyuu: I'm obsessed with sports anime, and this is one of the best. All the characters are so unique and feel very real. It's super funny with a good balance of sports action to dramatic character moments.

[fefairys]

when did you get into adventure time? i cant remember if you've said it before sorry fjdhfjfj i think for me it was some time in 2019 after it had ended but it's still really special to me :] i caught most of season 1 on tv over the years but that was it for a while

oh i got into adventure time when it was just starting in 2010 when i was 9! it was my favorite show as kid! i would literally write reminders on the fridge when a new highly-anticipated episode was coming out and would make sure everyone in my family knew this was ADVENTURE TIME NIGHT and i NEED the tv!!! i kept up with it religiously for a long time, and would theorize with my brother and school friends about it (my school friends who did not seem as interested in the Lore as i was lol)

but i fell off keeping up with it around season 7/8 because we stopped getting cable. for big event arcs like islands and elements, i would go and pirate those episodes and then when the finale came out i watched it on its own with no context at the time lmao

it was an enormous part of my childhood and shaped the way i think about storytelling and my sense of humor. it is my favorite piece of media ever and i owe it a lot <3 i haven’t been consistent in posting about it cause my obsession with it wore off for a while there since most people had moved past it since it ended so fionna and cake is really allowing me to be full on insane about it again like i was in middle school and it’s really fun :’) if u go back in my archive i have posts in my adventure time tag dating back like 8 years haha!

and then like last year i did a big rewatch/finally watching some late episodes i never saw and finally had Everything. and then i just finished another rewatch a few days ago :)

i could talk about what it means to me for forever but i’ll end it there cuz this is already long 😅

[starlight-time-machine]

Week in Review

02/04/2024 – 02/10/2024

Sunday

Manga Sunday time. Okay.

Girl Meets Rock good. Surprisingly considered character writing, and the possible aroace rep is fun.

Undead Unluck good.

Dandadan good.

Magilumiere good.

One Piece good.

Cipher Academy… I love this manga so much that it’s hard to sufficiently express the depth of my affection. I love the story, I love the writing, I love the characters, I love the designs, I love the art, I love everything about Cipher Academy. While I’m miserable at it coming to a somewhat untimely end, I’m grateful that I was able to read this masterpiece every week, because sometimes it was truly the only thing that kept me going. Even though its puzzles were truly nigh-impossible to solve, the heartfelt emotional core of the manga shone through clearly in its story and characters. I love Iroha as a protagonist – he may seem weak, and he’s gone through unthinkable things, but he still has the strength to learn and grow and reach for his unreachable ideals while inspiring others along the way. I love Toshusai’s intimidating aura and hardheaded beliefs that hide her pure desire to have friends and call each other cute nicknames. I love Kogoe’s mad scientist schtick and her One Point Lessons and her catchphrase and how even though she tries to come across as a cool and unhinged scientist, she can still be caught off guard and act more like a regular teenage girl. I love Tayutan’s emotionless puppy-dog retainer role and her fierce loyalty to Toshusai and her purposefully holding back all the time so as to not hurt people and her deep loneliness because of that and I love her twilight eyes. I love Yukako’s butch design and how seriously she takes things even if it’s a dance battle. I love Enchan’s moe sleeves and how she can be cute and cool at the same time and while she may seem naïve, the way she saw through to Iroha’s heart and vowed to support him was so amazing. I love Anon’s mysterious and morally ambiguous motivations and wily nature and how she constantly breaks the fourth wall and while seeing her get bullied was fun, it was even more fun to see moments of sincerity from her. I love Yosaimura’s protagonist aura and natural charisma and that one panel where she’s scaring the daylights out of Kogoe and how she’s always looking out for the interests of the group in terms of morale and cooperative harmony. I love Byu’s gun eyebrows and how she likes to hide under tables. I love Cipher Academy. This story and its characters will live on in my heart for a long, long time.

Monday

The new Undead Unluck was fun. When I see those hyper-detailed close ups on eyes, I know I’m in for a decently directed episode. I love how Billy’s plan was partially foiled by him not taking into consideration how Tatiana would still like him enough to attack him when Unjustice’d.

Finally read through the ending of Perilous Journey and I feel genuinely emotionally moved… Stewart has done such an excellent job of giving each kid their moments and subtle conclusions to their character arcs. From Kate mastering the regurgitation trick and her general physical prowess and her choice to step away from the cycle of violence to Constance accepting and utilising her precognition, to Sticky overcoming his shame with strength and resilience, and to Reynie finally believing in Mr. Benedict and realizing that his disillusionment with humankind is a disservice to its inherent goodness…this is so good. But indeed, it’s extremely perilous, and the stakes have been raised significantly since the last book. S.Q. is also a really tragic figure to me…seeing Mr. Benedict manipulate his kind nature was so chilling and sad. I know exactly what he means when he says he’s dealt a blow to the best part of S.Q., and I too hope he recovers instead of delving further into hatred. Overall, what a wonderful adventure book. I only give scores to books on my bookshelf, so this one gets a strong 8/10.

I’ve gotta get through my library books before I return them on Friday so I tried reading The Plentiful Darkness by Heather Kassner, but the writing style felt so uptight and purple prosey that it turned me off right away, so that’s going to be a pass from me.

Next up was Thin Air by Michelle Paver, which I picked up after reading and thoroughly enjoying her other ghost story, Dark Matter. And the similarities between the two are definitely striking – slightly pathetic male protagonists running from the world by traversing the limits of the Earth, forming bonds with dogs, light touches of repressed homoerotic feelings (?? I can’t believe she did this twice LOL I respect her so much for that), etc. While I liked the setting of Dark Matter more and its slowly encroaching dread and isolation (versus Thin Air’s constant threat of physical danger), I do like the setup of the complicated relationship between Thin Air’s protagonist and his brother, and it’s refreshing to get full blown conversations and arguments. The brother relationship is the emotional crux of this novel, and I thought it was genuinely compelling and filled with the realistic contradictions of love and hate between siblings (the part when they were digging the ice caves…when Stephen talked about how no one else remembers the things from their childhood and no one else would call him that nickname again…). But of course, it all led to the expected conclusion…I can’t help but feel that Paver just wrote the same book again lol I mean, it’s still a satisfying arc to watch play out, but it’s just lost a bit of the surprise factor. But I quite like her writing style and how she instilled dread through the vivid and careful descriptions of the mountain and the characters’ surroundings, and the part with the rucksack seemingly slowly inching its way towards Stephen was wonderfully horrible, as was the truth about what happened to Ward. I’m just glad to have read another adult fiction book that I enjoyed. (What I’ve realized is that a lot of contemporary popular fiction is just about characters being introspective or talking to other characters and not doing a whole lot…and what I want is an actual story where things happen and characters go on a journey or adventure…which is difficult to find outside of fantasy or sci-fi. Why can’t they write books about adults going on puzzle solving adventures too…)

Tuesday

I tried reading Press Reset by Jason Schreier, but after the first chapter I realized I wasn’t as interested in video game industry history as I thought I was (especially when I didn’t recognize or care about most of the games being mentioned here). And also it felt like the same old story – big conglomerates screwing over workers just to make their bottom line a little better. It’s especially depressing to read this when we’re only a month into 2024 and there’s already been over 1000 layoffs in the gaming industry and talk of an incoming crash, so I didn’t feel like reading any further.

Wednesday

The last book I have from my library haul is The Name of This Book is Secret by Pseudonymous Bosch, which is the first of another book series from my childhood. As a kid I loved the meta writing and the “kids solving puzzles and going on an adventure with interesting artifacts” formula, and as an adult I still enjoy it, but I can see the places where the book is somewhat lacking. There’s no real impetus to the kids deciding to head out on this adventure, since what happened to the magician was so vague, but I get the feeling the author just wanted to get the ball rolling so whatever. I like Cassandra and Max-Ernest’s personalities and quirkiness and I like how unique and memorable their respective living situations are (surprise gay grandparents??? I can’t believe I didn’t remember this, or I guess I didn’t clock it as a kid. And Max-Ernest’s half-and-half gimmick is fun).

Thursday

It’s DunMesh Thursday, and today I’ve made 汽水肉 (too lumpy, should’ve added more tapioca starch) and fried hash browns (they fell apart in the oil…should’ve added more flour and made them thicker…). In contrast to my bad cooking, though, the episode was super duper good. This was one of my favourite chapters from the manga, as it featured Chilchuck, my favourite character, trying to get through a conundrum by himself. I loved all the squishy and wiggly animation, I loved the direction, I loved the voice acting (Chilchuck’s voice through the ages, Marcille asking him how old he is, Laios info-dumping about mimics…), god everything was just so perfect and fun and funny.

Finished reading The Name of This Book is Secret and it was just alright. I just feel like there was never any real incentive for the kids to do all these things – like, I didn’t get invested in Cass’s guilt over Benjamin and I don’t buy that Cass and Max-Ernest are such close friends when they’ve only talked to each other for like five scenes. And then it was hard to buy that Cass was a hardcore survivalist when she goes into the Midnight Sun with absolutely zero planning or foresight. The whole adventure arc just felt weird, and I wish the singular puzzle in the Midnight Sun was more naturally integrated (why on earth would this secret passageway built in an evil villain’s lair have a helpful riddle for you to figure out the passcode). And then the kids getting these cool rewards at the end just felt so unearned… I’ll read the rest of the series, but it’s sad that this ended up in the Baccalario camp rather than the Stewart one.

Friday

Drag Race Friday yayyyyyy I’m so tired of Plane Jane because her “arc” feels like it was manufactured in a lab to get screentime and I hate it. The main challenge was fun, though, and it was nice to just see the girls in the workroom chatting with each other for a majority of the episode. Personally I would’ve put Nymphia’s look in the top over Dawn’s, but I’m also fine with her taking a safe placing because I feel like it doesn’t do well to stand out too much at the front end of the competition.

Satuday

After thinking about it for a bit, I think I’m obligated to induct harmoe as a whole into the STM awards because I love literally every single one of their singles and albums and songs. As my friend and I always say, harmoe never misses.

Other than that, it’s Chinese New Year so all I did was lie around and eat snacks.

[thesugarhole]

last day i have to put up wit train strikes and waking up so so early to get here on time and for the waiting times between. so im reading romac in between. on phone so no funny business. stopped at bench and men

anyway

dont ever ask a woman her age a man his salary and vitaly how the geography of romac looks like

eureka was apparently partially new york but i know bc of worldwide photo shoots they later use places like paris on the bg so thats funny. i guess whale arc (is the whale stuff still there?) multiple alien and monster and annet chases and various flying machines could get you there, if the world map is still about the same

i guess im pointing it out bc i saw someone make a weird map connecting. idfk or even remember but the atlantic ocean wasnt there anymore

"He could only communicate with me via a copyrighted form of speech available to the Unconnectable population- talking loudly."

thats not copyrighted to unconnectables thats copyrighted to portuguese* come ooooon man

everything in this world needs a fookin loicense god what a nightmare

🤨

sorry i just dont buy this. first of all from having read the original comic before second of all because hes just some guy in both versions (who just happened to work for g-dir, best of the worst type deal) and third of related to the second of, it all feels like they pushed a role on him he didnt even knew existed and it all went downhill from there.

if he really was one of the catalysts of the apocalypse though rather than just being caught up in the aftermath (alongside PILOT!!!!) and omitting all that in previous POV logs for the unreliable narrator trope, then sorry tumblr sexy man that never was. i cant defend you here. you looked at yourself, said 'i can make her better' and then made her worse

number 2 also i just noticed. "infi"? miss ai generated number 8 pendant that ruined one of my favorite sequences in the original comic with 'is this a set ALMOST MISSED MY TRAIN STOP I THOUGHT WE WERE AT TUE ONE BEFORE

""Are you, really?" Infi raised an eyebrow. "Even that bench you're sitting on is charging you infractions. If enough tickets pile up, the Dexes will come and take you away. You know what they do to big debitors, Sven. You know what they turn people into. I'm sure you won't like wearing a smile on your face forever.""

ok so. if i recall correctly people in too much debt get killed and turned into dexes and idk if all dexes do the same job but in pilots case he became a debt collector or something. aka kill more people to create more dexes

and in most panels of him pre apoc without the pilot gear he didnt seem too thrilled about anything, facial expression wise. what im getting to is, it could be something added in the rewrite but it would be interesting if part of his character design had a smile stapled on whether he likes it or not.

well for what its worth hes happy now, only vaguely aware of his past

anyway- svens gone but the seagull lived? i dont think this bench would know if its the same seagull. also how are you talking to it? the bench lost whatever little mind it had djhgsjfj and this is positive character development

The User flickered peculiarly and suspiciously in my time-worn sensors, just like... Infi did.

AI girlie nonsense aside i guess shes's intriguing me a bit. if anything she's the true unconnectable leader and scapegoated snippy. but also youre still not baiting me with the "is captain infi???" rewrites. i know how to count. (<- gonna look foolish if this later happens anyway. "am i that out of touch? no. its the author thats wrong") (speaking of counting haha very funny that sven and steven, names sounding like seven, meet infi, represented by an 8/infinite, and some undisclosed time later the somewhat sentient bench they were on meet captain (also known as seven). basic homestuckology

these side little detours into the world that was are fun i think. but again, most (all? honest to god i dont remember anyone named infi being a part of anything going on) of this was already in the original so ya

[leori-the-unlearned]

A Full Documentation of Tangle’s Tail’s Abilities (to the best of my knowledge)

Of course, we all know it stretches, but it also does a bunch of other subtle things, and I’ll go ahead and list any specific details that aren’t technically abilities but I wanted to list anyways.

table of contents… -Individual Powers -Maximum Length (has cool math) -Durability & Power -Sentience…? -Conclusion

Individual Powers:

-> Extending in length -> Variable thickness -> Elasticity -> Articulated fur

I list ’elasticity’ separate from ’extending’ BECAUSE… Tangle’s tail extends out more similarly to a tape measure than pulling a rubber band further out. If it merely stretched, also, her tail would retain only four dark stripes (the tip, the base, and two between) - instead, her tail is shown with far more when it’s lengthened.

I think these four listings are the base powers Tangle’s tail has - other abilities fall into one of these four, and you can’t exactly collapse any of them into one of the other categories without losing some important distinction. And the fur-hand is really something of its own.

Also, as a result of Tangle’s tail being a working muscle instead of just a rubber band, she can control whether it stretches or not at will. Maybe she relaxes her tail to stretch it elastically, meaning then it flops about and she isn’t actively moving it, and while she’s moving it to use as a weapon or grapple it is being tensed and doesn’t rubberband…

Oh, and variable thickness isn’t exactly a superpower, but Tangle’s tail can do it anyway, so I’ve listed it. If you go by her model, her tail is thicker than her body, but plenty of times it appears thinner than that in the comics, so I like to think she can just fluff it up or smooth the fur flat whenever she wants.

Maximum Length:

According to some calculations I eyeballed and made up, Tangle’s tail has a maximum length of at least 160 feet, up to maybe 300-something feet. ….That is quite the wide range, but as I said, I made the calculations up. Feel free to actually math it out, or look at my calculations and take a headcanon.

This is just going by how Tangle stretched her tail out to use as a barrier against zombots during the metal virus arc; estimating the space between lampposts to be 8 feet at minimum, and her wrapping around 5 different lampposts at minimum, 4-5 times each. So that’s 8 feet, on the gaps between 5 posts (so 4 gaps) to have a 40 foot range, times 4 times it goes across that length… easily 160 foot minimum length. If she stretches across more posts, add another 32 feet (8’ • 4 wraps) and see what you get! (Imagine how many miles of blood vessels there are in that…)

Of course, it seems Tangle can’t stretch to her maximum length on her own, at least not if she wants to be quick about it. It still gives her some leeway to be a living pulley belt.

Durability & Power:

Tangle’s tail is, likely, stronger than either of her arms. I mean, it punched open a safe door (granted, that was after the safe had exploded… but since the safe survived the explosion anyways, it was built to last, and also is a 100lb+ metal door she punched aside). She can also just combine her tail and arm strength by tugging on her tail as it tugs something else. I don’t have numbers on this, but it’s useful.

As for durability, it took a handful of badniks exploding violently without being more than singed. Which might only be average durability for a Main Character anyways, but can still be stated for the record. Elasticity might also increase its durability, like how Monkey D. Luffy is made of rubber and can’t be hurt by blunt force attacks.

Also, I caught this stat comparison in the Sonic Forces (Mobile) stats once.

Sentience..?

I don’t think this is a common theory, but I wholeheartedly refute it. Tangle’s tail is a body part, and I don’t think it has a secret octopus arm-brain in there; just regular reflexes and it being a limb Tangle is skilled in using.

Also, it would give Whispangle a permanent, awkward third wheel. No thanks.

Conclusion:

I don’t have any poignant single line or paragraph to say. I just wanted to present some facets of Tangle’s tail that aren’t often talked about, and raise the question of how long it actually stretches. If you’ve got additions or something to refute, please share them!

[heleentje]

💕 self-love time! talk about which ones of YOUR creations (edits, artworks, fanfics) you like the most then send to other creators to do the same 💕

(Sending on = optional.)

Oooh, it’s going to be really predictable if I talk about Moonlight, but I’m still going to talk about Moonlight. I cannot properly put into words how happy I am with the way it turned out (but let’s try anyway).

(Cut for spoilers and, in true Moonlight fashion, also length)

I’ve told this story here and there, but Moonlight originally came from three things: my refusal to accept the Champions’ deaths, my general melancholy upon defeating Ganon and leaving behind the freedom of botw’s Hyrule, and my amusement when the game resets to your last save upon beating the story.

That last part got me thinking about how terrifying it would be for Link to wake up after beating the Calamity and finding himself having to face it again. Originally Moonlight was just a few drabbles in my notebook (the scene in chapter 5 where Link seeks out Revali was actually a later reworking of one of the very first scenes I wrote for it). The story was on the backburner for several months, but all of a sudden I decided I wanted to write it anyway.

The idea that Zelda was also caught in the loops was an early one, but it was not part of the original outline. That little tidbit only came about when I’d already picked the title for the story, and so the whole song the title came from (Shalott, by Emilie Autumn) suddenly became weirdly prophetic (the full line that the title is part of is And there’s moonlight every single night/ as I’m locked in these towers).

Speaking of titles, the chapter titles are almost all from Vienna Teng songs, and picking them out was often a lot of fun! Thematically, I’d say the most important songs were Level Up and Enough To Go By. Enough To Go By provided the title for chapters 8 (If my love could keep you alive), 11 (praying you aren’t out of range), and also Ginneke’s This flooded sky, three parts of the overall story that are deeply connected when it comes to emotional beats. Chapter 11 is the logical consequence of the events that transpired in chapter 8, and this flooded sky of course takes place during chapter 11.

(If my love could keep you alive is also my proudest title achievement. It applies to just about every character in that chapter.)

Level Up, in turn, lent its lyrics to the final chapter (Day number one in the rest of forever, because it could never be anything else), but also chapter 5 (Dynamite the dam on the flow). Going back earlier, it was also the title inspiration for another fic of mine, Your own heart that matters. YOHTM was a large part of the foundation of that chapter, so it seemed only fitting.

It’s no secret that Moonlight got extremely out of hand, I’ve joked about it often enough. My original idea for the story truly was only 30k (final word count: > 170k). When my first chapter came in at 7k, I was still foolishly hopeful. The first chapter needed to do a lot of setup! Surely the next chapters would be shorter!

I think I was disabused of that notion partway through chapter 2.

But for all that it got out of hand, I am still very happy that it did. The intended cast was originally a lot smaller: Link and Zelda, with Revali having a marginally bigger role than the other Champions, and everyone who wasn’t one of those six only appearing towards the final chapter.

Fortunately for me and for the story, the characters did not agree with that.

And I am extremely happy that I got to give not only Link and Zelda, but also the Champions and even the successor Champions something like a distinct character arc. The most difficult characters in that regard were probably Daruk, Urbosa and Teba, because they generally have their shit together, so it’s not like they need any deep character conflict or development. But we adopted the adage of ‘stable, not static’ for them. They don’t need to change who they are as people, but that doesn’t mean they can’t have their own worries and concerns, and make decisions based on that.

(I think, in the end, Harth got a little more of an arc than Teba, especially since we set him up as an intentional mirror for Revali.)

Speaking of Daruk, there was a time where Ginneke and I feared that he’d be sidelined compared to the other Champions. And then chapter 8 happened and suddenly he became a big part of the story :D

So let me talk about Ginneke. (And yes love, I know you were the one to send me the ask, but let me gush about you anyway <3)

Moonlight wouldn’t be half of what it is today without her. We refined that very first outline through hours and hours of conversation and bouncing ideas off each other. She is almost single-handedly responsible for the role Purah ended up playing in this story, as well as Link being explicitly genderqueer and Yunobo’s entire plotline.

The latter two both found their origin in Carry Them Inside You, the first of the sidefics, so let me gush about those for a moment! They’re all explicitly canon to Moonlight, and while we tried to stay fairly light on the references in Moonlight proper, you will absolutely get the best reading experience if you read the sidefics alongside the main story!

Because Moonlight only has Link and Zelda as POV characters, the sidefics were our best way to show what went on when they weren’t around (or, in Carry Them Inside You’s case, what Link was doing that he didn’t want Zelda to know about). An attentive reader may have even caught a few reveals before they were shown in Moonlight proper: the Champions still being alive was all but stated in there’s no turning away, and a soft yellow moon gave more context to Mipha’s actions in chapter 9. Some of our biggest Revali knives were shown in This flooded sky before they made it into the main story (and one never made it into the main story at all, because Revali isn't talking).

(If you know Enough to go by, then the title of This flooded sky also carries a hint towards Revali’s final plan: I’m wanting your anger/ I only want to see if I can shake you out of sleep/ And bring you out under this flooded sky/ At any price)

And of course, Ginneke’s writing is absolutely spectacular in all of them!

Going forward, the POV will probably not remain limited to Link and Zelda alone. There’s a lot going on in Hyrule, and they definitely don’t know all of it.

I am extremely happy with how both of their stories came out. For Link in particular, I think I succeeded in creating the same sense of isolation that’s characteristic of early botw, before you really set out into the world. We debated heavily whether we wanted the first four loops to be so repetitive, but I’m glad we did in the end, because it really worsened Link’s state of mind and set up the events of loop 5 and onwards.

And by that same token, I’m glad that the world expanded after that, first with Revali and then the other Champions, and then the rest of Hyrule as well. Despite the somber tone of it, chapter 11 was one of my favorite chapters to write, because I finally got to put the rest of Hyrule front and center.

(And also because it’s where any chance of Zelda and Revali ever having a cordial relationship gets killed deader than the leviathans. Zelda and Revali each consider themselves responsible for Link’s death, and they are projecting that guilt onto each other.)

Zelda and Link’s relationship was another favorite part of mine. Sometimes I reread the earlier chapters and I’m struck by how distant they were, compared to their closeness in the final chapters. They really didn’t know how to act around each other, especially since Link had lost most of his memories and their relationship was always a bit fraught to begin with. But I’m glad they evolved past that.

And I’m firmly of the opinion that Link would always chafe at being confined to a formalized court environment again. He feared that possibility from the very start (and it was part of the reason why he put off fighting Ganon for so long), so it was very liberating when he finally got to say outright ‘no, I don’t want that’, and still find a way to support Zelda, if only from a distance.

And Revali, oh Revali… In early chapters, we often joked about Revali and Purah fighting for the tritagonist position. And while Purah eventually got the title when it came to plot developments, Revali definitely earned it for character developments.

He’s a mess of contradictions. He doesn’t want to move on, but he’s ready to sacrifice his life so that Link doesn’t lose his. He longs to be a part of Rito Village again, but he’s convinced that the Rito will either disdain him for failing to take down the Calamity or only see him for his title. He feels so much guilt about failing to save Link that he takes all of it out on Zelda. It should come as no surprise that his scenes were among my absolute favorites to write, even if they were often very difficult to get right and needed multiple rewrites to hit on the correct tone.

Mipha probably got the second-biggest role out of all the Champions. When she regained her Grace in chapter 8, we realized she would remember that loop according to the rules we’d established. And that made her a perfect person to both serve as a voice of reason to stop Zelda and Revali before things really got too bad, and also call out Link on some of his shit later on.

Daruk quickly became one of my favorite characters to write (best Champion). He was unceasingly supportive, even when Link didn’t particularly want to hear that, but Yunobo being so intimidated by him was always something that weighed on him, and he tried very hard to present himself as unthreathening. Perhaps he even went a little overboard there, but he genuinely is extremely proud of Yunobo and would have been no matter what Yunobo chose to do.

In the end, it was Urbosa who probably had the least involved plotline of all the Champions, but having her around was still a massive boon for Zelda, and eventually Riju. One of the things we really wanted to make clear was that Urbosa was not here to take the title of Chief back from Riju. If Riju asked her to, she might have accepted, but it needed to be very clear that she did not outrank Riju, nor did she want to. (And if Urbosa sees a lot of Zelda in Riju, well, obviously.)

I’d also be remiss in not mentioning some of the other characters: Purah, our plot tritagonist, who was instrumental in figuring out exactly what was going on and providing Link and Zelda with some much needed help in those first few loops. Riju, who among all the time shenanigans is one of the few people concerned with the political implications of a Hyrule without the Calamity, who is such a perfect mirror of Zelda: forced to bear a burden that by all rights should have been her mother. Sidon, so concerned for Link, so eager to fight by his side that he’s the one who finally hands Zelda the solution to their problem, so willing to defy his father (and Dorephan, still mourning the child he already lost and terrified that he’ll lose yet another one). And Yunobo, always casting himself in the shadow of his famed grandparent, but so much braver and smarter than he gives himself credit for, who probably did more to turn the tide in the final battle than any other character.

(Also Teba, who is in a constant state of ‘what are all these fucking children doing here?’)

Okay, so I’ve spent almost 2000 words talking about Moonlight already, and I can probably get in another 1000 if I really wanted to. But suffice to say, I’m extremely happy with how that story came out. It’s probably the best thing I’ve written to date, and I think I pulled off just about everything I set out to do.

Of course, absolutely none of that would have been possible without Ginneke, who helped refine this vague idea of a story into something actually worth reading. It was an absolutely wild ride, and while writer’s block hit me hard at several points, I’m really glad we got to the end of it.

There’s more to this universe, though it will probably involve a lot less time shenanigans! I think I’m quite solidly done with those for a little while.

[spqromani]

The Void Century

SPOILER ALERT!!!! do not read this if you are not caught up to date with the manga

I'm terrible at gatekeeping information. Or understanding them. This is kind of a 'checklist' of things I'm looking forward to see uncovered/explained in depth.

1. What was the Great Kingdom's deal?

Like, were they evil tyrants or something like that? Did they hold power over several nations just like the WGOVT does?

2. Why did 20 kingdoms unite to tear it down?

Doflamingo uncovers at the beginining of the Dressrosa Arc, that an alliance of 20 kingdoms was made to face against the Great Kingdom during The Void Century. What was their common goal? What united these 20 kingdoms to go against it?

3. Who created and used the Ancestral Weapons?

We are aware that Poseidon is an actual living breathing person who was the princess of a country, so I wonder if she used her powers during the war against or at favor of the Great Kingdom. However, the other two weapons were most definitely created by someone. Did the Great Kingdom create them or was it a joint effort of the 20 kingdoms?

4. What part did Shandora and Wano take on the war?

It seems that Shandora and Wano are the most ancient civilizations in One Piece, along with the Minks, but we are already that the Minks are aligned to Wano through the Kozukis. What I want to find out is if Shandora was allied to the Great Kingdom and what exactly was Wano participation in the war of the Lost Century.

5. Why did Wano close its borders after the war?

6. Why did Wano deliver poneglyphs around the world?

I understand Fishman Island's Joy Boy poneglyph, it was probably delivered by him himself or sent there under his command. And the Minks' Road Poneglyph because of their alliance with the Kozukis. But why did Alabasta and Shandora receive them as well?

7. Why the hell did Alabasta refuse to move to Mariejois? Pure principles? They were never a family of assholes?

This is really intriguing for me. Doflamingo states that the royal families of the 20 kingdoms, that won the war against The Great Kingsom, all agreed to move to Mariejois, the Holy Land, situated on top of the Red Line. All, except for one - The Nefertaris of Alabasta. That means that whatever reason united the 20 kingdoms to fight together was probably a big picture kind of thing. They weren't all best friends jealoud of the Great Kingdom.

8. WTF is Uranus, man?

One of the poneglyphs in Wano better have an explanation about Uranus because I am running out of tolerance time to receive info about these weapons. And it must the most dangerous one out of the three, otherwise why hide it for so long?

9. Why TF did Toki have to travel to the future to find a way to enter Wano?

Oden says during his flashback that he found out, upon arriving at Laugh Tale, that Wano was open to the rest of the world during The Void Century. And if Toki came from 800 years ago, that means she lived during the time Wano was open to the outside world, why was she not able to enter the country then? Why did she travel in time with a mission of getting there?

10. Why the hell did Ohara have one as well?

One poneglyph, I mean. I just remembered that.

11. Where the hell or who the hell has the last Road Poneglyph?

12. Does Pluton still exist? Is it hidden?

I was confronted by a random fellow fan saying this. For years, I always thought the Water 7's shipwrights were the ones who had the blueprints to build Pluton. But apparently, they actually have a counter measure one, to build in case of the actual thing being revived? And Crocodile was looking for the actual thing? Like, it was never destroyed and just hidden away? And apparently the poneglyph in Alabasta had the location of it? I don't know, tbh. I'm confusion.

ANSWER: (ONEPIECE #1053) Tengu, the old man who took care of O-Tama, is revealed to be Kozuki Sukiyaki, Oden's father. Robin asks him where is Pluton, affirming that the Poneglyph in Alabasta said it was located in Wano, after all, and Sukiyaki answers that it is there! :) (23/07/22)

13. WTF is up with Tequila Wolf?

That's the bridge Nico Robin was warped to by Kuma after Sabaody. Apparently, it has been under construction for at least 700 years. That means the Celestial Dragons themselves must have ordered the construction of this bridge right after the formation of the WGOVT. It's located in the East Blue, also. May be an important info.

14. The Will of the D.

15. Do the "D." people have anything to do with the Great Kingdom?

Some people say the D. might have been the royal family of the Great Kingdom. If yes, then what family? The Monkey D.s? The Gol D.s? The Trafalgar D.s? The Marshall D.s? What D. family! There are several of them!

16. Also, they are supposed to be the Celestial Dragons's "natural enemy", what the hell does that mean?

17. What stopped Joy Boy from fulfilling his promise?

Anyways I would love a one piece "appendix" kind of book - like, One Piece World 101 for Dummies

[igniting-quill]

hi i dont think i can send asks on your other account so i'll do it here

So my dumb prompt is (for my prompt ask game challenge thing - not sure what it is either okay shhh im TIRED)

Helga and Serenity meet and Helga discovers what guns are

Shenanigans ensue

This is in response to a post I made on my other account @uc-beepboop. That sucks that you can’t send asks in the other account. Perhaps it’s because it’s my side account? IDK. Anyways, I tried to take your tired prompt into an actual sustainable fic and I ran with it. Also will probably brush this up more, but expect it on the good ‘ol ao3 some time. Some time may range from 3 business days to 3 months. Depends on when I’m satisfied.

Characters: Helga Hatebad (Arc 8: The King is Dead) and Serenity Sapphire (Arc 9: Once Upon a Crime)

Preface: This would technically not work because of the timeline difference between Arc 8 and Arc 9. I think Serenity and Helga were alive during the same time, but Idk how old Helga is, so I didn’t know how to write that. Due to this time gap, I elected to ignore it and just write Serenity and Helga as they are in canon. That being said, I took them as they were pre-Arc and plopped them into this questionable time-bendy fanfic. 

Enjoy.

—

BANG.

The sound, piercing fast and loud, halted Helga Hatebad in her tracks. It was like a fireworks blast, but with none of that ending sizzling noise. Threatening and so efficient too! It had the power to emit a sound that caused her, shocked, to stop walking. Then, it was gone in a second, the only evidence of its existence was the auditory whiplash ringing in her ears.

Helga was just about to leave for the plane of fire. She left, for the time being, for some Hatebad family gathering, so she bound over to Glacrian for a short visit. But now, she really needed to go back. Her cute, giant, slobbering hellhound was waiting for her on the other side. 

However, after that noisy blast, her curiosity beckoned her to go investigate. It sounded like some sort of contraption, made of physical parts that were non-magical… maybe a weapon. She was a weapon maker, so if her guess was correct, she would love to see what was in store.

She grabbed ahold of her Hatebad-made battleaxe, placed a hand on her Hatebad-made plate armor, and finally combed through her Hatebad-made beard. She proceeded to stroke her facial hair, considering the possibilities, while sauntering over toward where the sound came from. She squinted, shifting her gaze around in hopes of seeking answers to her questions. 

Instead, she saw a busted window on one of the local Glacarian banks, The Glacarian Bank. It was an obviously Lovejoy-owned property, the rival family to Hatebad’s, so Helga didn’t particularly care for the destruction. She approached the wreck, and with her last remaining braincell, decided to squeeze her small dwarven body through the jagged broken glass of the bank’s window. 

Only after she managed to land inside did she consider the implications if she got caught. The Lovejoy’s would find yet another reason to go after the Hatebads. Helga shrugged. Oh well. She walked deeper into the bank, but paused once she noticed that there was someone else past the corridor. There was a harengon. From the back, long hare ears that drooped from her head, an old yet well-cared for leather jacket. Now, she seemed to be fiddling with some contraption in her hands, some stick-like wood that was meshed with different metal pieces. 

Helga took another step forward, only for her foot to crunch against a piece of glass on the floor, shattering the quiet and giving away her location.

The harengon jumped up in surprise, but once she landed, she turned around and confidently turned the gadget towards Helga, a sharp metallic portion pointed at the dwarf. 

Nothing about this weapon clicked with Helga’s background knowledge. What was it? How did it work? Could the Hatebad's manufacture those and add them to their new products line?

“What’s that?” Helga asked, gesturing towards the unidentifiable weapon.

“Are you a Lovejoy?” The harengon asked, ignoring Helga. The bunny did not sound that threatening. What it looked like, at least to Helga, was that the harengon was stalling for time. Well, why not appease an audience?

“Me? A Lovejoy!” Helga laughed. “That’s the funniest thing I have ever heard. First of all, the Lovejoys are high elves. I’m a mountain dwarf. Second of all, I’m Helga Hatebad, and my family, the Hatebads, hates the Lovejoys! It’s a rivalry. My mother, especially, hates their guts.”

“Oh. Wait so you hate the Lovejoys?”

“Yeah.”

The harengon pointed the pointy weapon downwards leaned in. “So… you won’t tell on us?”

“Well, you’re doing us Hatebad’s a favor, so I’m not inclined to.”

For a moment, the harengon looked suspicious. But, in a way that showed that she was a little too trusting, she extended her hand for a handshake.

“Serenity Sapphire. I’m here with a crew and we’re breaking into the bank. Either we got hired by somebody or Art, my boss, just wanted us to do a mini-heist for the fun of it.”

“The Lovejoys are rich, they’ll be able to afford spending a little cash for you.” Helga nodded approvingly. She didn’t bring up that, these days, the Hatebads also had a lot of money as well. “Also, I you didn’t answer my question.” 

“Shoot.” Serenity said, asking for Helga to repeat the question again.

Helga pointed towards the item held in Serenity’s hands. “As a weapon’s maker, I have to know: what is that?”

“This?” Serenity shifted the large apparatus in her hands. “This is a gun.”

“A… ‘gun.’” Helga approached the new word hesitantly. “What does it do?”

“It shoots bullets.”

“Bullets?”

“You know. The way a cannon shoots cannonballs, but here it just happens on a smaller scale.”

Helga pointed to the shattered glass on the ground. “Is that how you broke the window?”

The harengon looked sheepish. “The first shot, yes. Gun’s are a pretty new weapon, so I never knew how bullets would react with glass. Turns out it just kinda goes through. It made a tiny hole, some cracks around it, but it didn’t do much more to weaken the structure. Juniper gave the rest of the window a nice kick, and that’s what really broke it. All I caused was a loud sound. So yeah, I got put on guard duty instead of getting to do any of the fun stuff.”

“Can I see the… gun in action?”

Serenity shook her head. “Julian chewed me out bad. I mean, what brought you here? The noise right?”

“Yeah.”

“Exactly. Julian was all like, ‘that’s the downside to a gun! The sound of it firing is real loud, everyone will hear it Serenity, that’s a stupid idea.’ But, I argue, that what it loses in subtlety it gains in power.” The gun was larger than Serenity herself, so she stretched the full length of her arm to showcase the weapon. “For a long distance attack, you load up the bullet and then shoot an enemy with a press of the trigger. Up close, I can fight with the bayonet.”

“The sharp part right?”

“Yes, attached to the end of a gun’s barrel. At least, I think, that’s what my dad called the sharp part when I last talked with him about the gun? The gun’s from him, and he got it from a guy… Bor— Ple? I don’t know. It's written on the side of the chamber.”

Helga looked at the name “Borple” and proceeded to immediately forget the name, unknowing that she would meet a member of the artificer family later.

Serenity continued. “I honestly don’t know too much about guns, only that it is the first of its kind. Something like a bow, a canon, a sideways firework, all with a dagger-like point at the end. My old man, Mr. Sapphire. gave it to me when I told him I wanted to become a criminal.”

Helga cackled at that. “Hilarious. You know, my mother was apparently a criminal in her younger days. A sky pirate.”

“Wait, that’s so cool. I’d love to meet her”

“Yeah, right?”

Suddenly a blaring alarm rang across the bank, intruding right into their conversation.

“Serenity!” A voice yelled out. “We gotta go, we’re gonna get caught!” 

A door opened from the far wall behind Serenity. A purple tiefling with stark white hair, giant curled horns, and blank white eyes appeared. In their arms they struggled to drag out a giant black bag, presumably filled to the brim with money. Yet, even as they failed to drag it, the bag already had giant rips that proceeded to stretch larger and larger. That was probably from the shattered glass on the ground.

“Do you need help with that?” Helga shouted above the loud shrieking pitch of the alarm. “I’m quite strong.”

“Now… Who are you? Serenity’s friend or something?”

“Riot… uhhh” Serenity shrugged, “Long story.”

“We won’t make it in time, slowpoke. Give me that.” Another voice called out. A figure emerged from the door: an aasimar with bronze skin, blue eyes, blonde hair, and only one wing. She was already carrying a lot of her own luggage, which she held above the sharp pieces of glass on the ground. It was clear, she was straining to hold onto everything, but still attempted to grab ahold of the tiefling’s, Riot’s?, load. Out slid a few coins, but it did not seem like the one-winged aasimar even noticed.

Everyone proceeded to dart out of the building, away from the crime scene. All the while, Helga and Serenity ran side by side, huffing and puffing out breaths of exertion.

Helga looked up, noticing the setting sun, golden light seeping through the allies of Glacaria. She really had to go now. Oh, her poor hell hound was waiting for her to come back while she went on a whole side quest adventure. 

“I think—” Helga sucked in a breath as she ran, “this is where we part ways.”

“Aww—” Serenity panted, but was already beginning to split off in the direction her crew was running towards. “I guess,” Breath, “I should follow,” Breath, “this money on the ground,” Heaving breath, “It was nice meeting you!”

“Same!”

The harengon finally darted away, ignoring how the butt end of her gun dragged on the ground.

Ah, what Helga would give to learn more about this exciting new weapon. But duty called. Helga jogged away from the crime zone, and slowed down after she got out of range. Hopefully Serenity’s crime gang would be smart enough to prevent people from following their physical money trail and snatched some Lovejoy money while they did it. Helga headed back towards the plane of fire.

[llamakenma]

Hellooooo to you! Congratulations on reaching a milestone!

Can I request prompts #5 and #12 together? The character can be either Suna from Haikyuu or Gojo Satoru from Jujutsu Kaisen. Thank you!!

note: hello! i chose gojo so i hope you don't mind! and thank you so much!! i hope you will enjoy this!

request: prompt 5 ("I pushed you away because you deserve better") + prompt 12 ("Could you see me like that, just for a moment? Pretend I mean something to you.”).

join my 500 follower event --> prompt list here!

----

the relationship you have with gojo satoru was simply blissful, every part of it made you content, made you feel that you were more than enough: you knew gojo felt the same way, you knew through his actions- from the grand ones to the tiniest ones- that he was in love with you as much as you were with him. there was nothing to complain about, nothing to be angry about- your relationship was what they had called ideal, one where both parties deeply cared for each other.

yet, as perfect as you were with him, things started to take a turn for the worse as your relationship steadily grew in years; gojo satoru no longer made time for you. he was no longer present at the dinner table at 8, complimenting your cooking or feeding you the vegetables he still refused to eat. his presence on the bed was simply left as a presence, there was no soul nor matter there- all that was left was the heat of his presence that was slowly melting away. along with this, dates were no longer a thing- the late-night movie marathons were buried deep under the blankets you once you to share, the amusement park rides never felt more empty as you sat alone on the ferris wheel that looked down onto the city, and the inside jokes you had made with him were no longer at use, it was slowly tearing you apart with the roaring silence of each second.

and so it came to the ending arc of your relationship with him, the part in which confronting him was harder than raising a child. you had prepared yourself, emptying your load of tears days before this talk was to come- you knew you would not be able to mutter a word at the sight of his face, instead would be drowning in the flowing pool of your lingering sadness and loneliness. you inspected every curve and slope of his face: the way his snow lashes seemed too long yet they laid perfectly on the rim of his eyes, how the small threads of his kiss his forehead just like how you used to, and the curve of the cherry tinted lips that you loved to chew on, teasing him every time he would bend down to share a passionate kiss with you. every aspect of him was simply just perfect.

'i am breaking up with you gojo. i have moved my things to my apartment, you can keep this one.' you said as you stood up, approaching him to hand the house keys.

'goodbye gojo, i hope you live a great life.' you whispered your final words of the relationship, as you walked out the front door, leaving gojo in the trance he has yet to leave.

gojo satoru knew this was coming sooner or later- he had anticipated this moment long before, yet perhaps he should've prepared even further, and do research on just how bad heartbreak actually could be. he could feel the tears that rimmed his eyes, threatening to fall, just like how he was mentally starting to fall apart. sobs and sniffles escaped, yet upon his blurry vision, he could see the delicate half of a heart that hung from your keychains- the one he had gifted you on your first anniversary, and now the ones you had both equipped on your house keys- his house keys. he could feel the needles that pierced his heart, and he could only reminisce the last smile you had left him with- the smile that didn't reach your eyes, unlike the ones you would give him every morning when he woke up, unlike the ones that would spark a gleam in your eyes and make him fall head over heels once again.

everything suddenly felt more hollow than it should be, it felt empty- empty without you by his side.

it was a good four years before he met you again, coincidentally at the corner cafe that you would often visit with him when you were together- yet this time you were with another person- one that had captured your heart, and someone that was far from him. you had yet to notice him, for you wore the biggest smile as you stared into the eyes of your significant other, laughing at possibly the joke they had just told you. you held the same look of love that you once gave him- no, maybe one with even more love.

he knew he should be happy, after all this time, and especially since this was what he had truly wanted for you- to be happy in the arms of another. yet, the lingering love he still felt for you pushed him to talk to you, as you finally sat alone in the booth.

'hey, y/n. is this seat taken?' he started.

you turned around to meet his eyes, giving him a friendly smile, 'no, gojo, make yourself comfortable.'

meeting him had caught you by surprise, especially when you had not seen him since the time you had ended things with him. your fingers wrapped around the cup of coffee, as you tried to divert your attention from the awkward silence that enveloped the booth.

' i saw a person with you earlier, are they your partner?' he asked.

'yea. i've been with them for two years now.' you raised your head to answer him.

gojo could feel his heartbreaking once again, as he saw your eyes gleam at the thought of a person that wasn't him, a smile creeping onto your face. despite this, he knew you had questions for him, the fiddling you did with your thumbs was still present.

'out of the blue gojo, but it used to bother me a lot on what actually made us drift apart. was it something i did? was i not enough for you?" you blurted, trying to clear this burdening feeling once and for all.

gojo gave you a smile before he answered, ' no y/n. it was never you, i should have told you when you had ended things with me, but i was too much of a coward to go after you to call you back. it was me. i just felt like you could've been way happier with someone who wasn't me, ya know? i pushed you away because you deserve so much better y/n, someone like the one you are with now. so, it was never your fault y/n.'

you had doubts on yourself all along, every inch of the free time you spent was on what made him pull himself away from you, just what had made him stop coming home early so he could spend time with him. sure, the thoughts lessened when you started a relationship with your partner, nevertheless, the thoughts continued to haunt you. yet, it was him- it was his insecurities that had broke the lovable bond, it was his selflessness and feeling of being selfish- the thought of him holding you back was what had led to all of this. sure, you had your own share of insecurities when it came to the relationship, after all, the man that sat in front of you was breathtakingly gorgeous.

you smiled down at your empty coffee cup, the weight that used to sit on your shoulders finally vanishing at his words.

'thank you for answering me gojo.' you said, as you stood up, gathering your things. " i hope to see you around again."

as you turned his back on him, readying to leave the shop, you felt a sturdy arm on your wrist, telling you to turn around and meet its owner.

' y/n, could.. could you please see me like that for a moment? pretend i mean something to you. even if it's just for the last time.'

the gentle look of your eyes met his, this wasn't the look of love that you had given to the person earlier. this was simply just a look of courtesy, paired with a soft smile that apologized.

'sorry gojo, i don't think i can do that. but i was happy when i was with you gojo, i really, and truly was.'

[year2000electronics]

good morning. so every member in team bleck has a member that sort of ‘parallels’ the five member ensemble of the heroes and tippi. bleck parallels mario as the leader, mimi and peach are the girly girls, o’chunks and bowser are the muscle, and that leaves the last two-

(long post incoming)

the fact that 8-3 and 8-4 have luigi and dimentio paired off with eachother pretty much implies that he’s intended to be luigis parallel, and that nastasia and tippi are also parallels. not to be overly thorough again but i’m gonna spell out a lot of the ways both these parallels work

luigi and dimentio:

- have matching colour schemes (luigis inverted green and blue becomes purple and yellow, and vice versa)

- have the obvious parallels thanks to moments like in 6-1, 8-3 and 8-4 where dimentio and luigi/mr l have extended dialogues alone

- on the topic of mr l and dimentio, both of their major design traits are their masks and how one can’t be recognized with it on, and one’s true intentions can’t be recognized thanks to their mask always smiling

- carson mentions that dimentio was turned away once by the count before seeing that he had potential, much like luigi wasn’t allowed to come on adventures in pm64 until mario saw him handle himself in ttyd (this ones a bit of a stretch admittedly)

and just overall the fact that luigi and dimentio are the only remaining pair means they’re obvious parallels

tippi and nastasia:

- have mirroring but similar form transformations (tippi from human to flying creature, nastasia was implied to change from a flying creature to a humanoid)

- both are from blecks past, but only one of them was his love

- both of them sacrifice themselves in the name of love for the count (nastasias may have been platonic or familial), but only nastasia lives to see the end of the ordeal

- both are the one ‘non playable’ character in the group- you cant REALLY play as tippi and nastasia doesn’t get a boss fight

- pretty much the ‘brains’ of the group, the one that speaks on behalf of bleck/mario a lot of the time

HOWEVER. what if i told you i could also make the argument that THIS is also an equally valid interpretation.

now obviously the game pretty much confirms that luigi and dimentio are parallels through their fights but i could also argue that luigi/nastasia and tippi/dimentio have some parallels of their own, and why i wanna highlight this i’ll talk about later

tippi and dimentio:

- unlike the other parallels, tippi and dimentio are actively made so that dimentio can’t be tattled. he is literally the only miniboss or major npc like this (aside from maybe nastasia as she has no true overworld encounter)

- at the beginning of the game, both of them are the characters with the most mysterious pasts, as in little to no information is given (tippis gets given later, again i’ll come back to this)- dimentio is the only bar story that doesn’t help out much in terms of his past or lack thereof

- both of them have teleported a character to the safety of flipside in the events of the story (tippi in ch 4 and dimentio in the ch 2 interlude, though teleporting is part of his niche in general)

- have elements that may or may not hide a “true” face (is dimentio’s mask his face or is he just like that?)

- tippi and dimentio’s “moments” together are a bit fewer and far between compared to the others, like her strange out of place “i know you. you’re that...” and the fact that she’s the only one who survives dimentio’s ch 7 nuke (when he tells her directly he’s her enemy) and the fact that despite luigi being onscreen and PLENTY mouthy in his actual fight with dimentio, TIPPI is the one who talks back to you in dimentio’s optional game over

- this ones a bit of a stretch as it’s heavily based on theories that i don’t even believe myself but if you believe dimentio is the magicians son then both tippi and dimentio have a pseudo connection to pixls

luigi and nastasia:

- both are seen as the ‘right hand’ or ‘number two’ for their respective ‘number ones’ (mario and bleck) and generally play off of more subdued versions of their designs (nastasias glasses vs blecks monocle, her white clothes vs his beige cape and hat, her light blue vs his dark blue, luigis proportions being a bit more average compared to mario and a more subdued green colour scheme)

- both have a deep affection for bleck/mario and this is largely in part due to their pasts with them, where seeing their ability and kindness made them believe bleck/mario was truly brilliant (nastasias lines and backstory imply that she was around to see bleck as blumiere which would imply she knew him just as long or longer as tippi did), they also have spent more time by bleck/marios side than the others, comparatively

- both almost never have things on their own, their escapades are mostly ‘side stories’ (but they still DO happen: i’ll give tippi and nastasia the fact that they do hover around mario/bleck more than luigi hovers around mario BUT nastasia isn’t always around bleck, does her own thing, and is even in a meeting when bleck isnt vs tippi only ever leaving marios side when she’s forcibly removed)

- much like luigi and dimentio have their moments, nastasia and luigi also share moments (mostly in the first part of the game, keep it in mind): the most pivotal part of the direction luigi goes in this game is when he gets caught by nastasia, and nastasia is the one who tells him not to mess with the wedding

- in addition, many times throughout the game nastasia details to count bleck each minions defeat, often just telling him the messages they relay or punishing them herself, but specifically when it comes to mr. l’s disappearance, she says she’s the one at fault

- you could also make another design argument that mr l’s mask could also be a parallel to nastasias glasses as a large part of her character also comes from her glasses as they do the fact that mr l can’t be recognized- theyre her weapon (the red rims are also a bit of a gut punch when it comes to that)

- both of them wind up ‘taking count blecks place’ (as the final boss, and as the one to get hit by dimentio’s fatal blow) (interestingly this also puts them both out of commission for the final boss)

- this ones a big stretch but nastasia is seen openly sobbing at the end and luigi is the one of the four heroes who’s the most prone to tears (according to tv tropes at least)

so with all that being said, Why. why did i make this post. i’m sure i could draw comparisons to fuckin uhhh luigi and idk BONECHILL if i had the time on my hands. well the reason why is because i wanted to think about... what if we all looked at spm like this.

in the beginning, nastasia and luigi are in fact eachothers parallels, nastasias logic vs luigis emotion nastasia being the villain to defeat luigis hero yadda yadda yadda. but as the story goes on more and more of the luigi/dimentio parallel begins to happen. and this is because starting with chapter 5, dimentio begins to show his hand- to the heroes, but also to the audience. more of his plan is succeeding, and as count bleck grows more reluctant, this story becomes less and less about how to defeat him and more about how to stop the chaos heart from doing its thing.

we all know how that story goes though, how dimentio usurps the count and takes luigi with his little pizza hands. but i’m thinking that luigis parallels, luigis villains are really supposed to represent the arc 1 villain and the arc 2 villain- both nastasia and dimentio are the ones who are trying to make the man in green choose the dark prognosticus as the true prophecy, it’s just that as the story goes on, dimentio is the one who seizes control of the story. even to the effect that he’ll shift the very structure of the team around so that HE will do battle with luigi. so that HE is the one who is the obvious representative of the ideal host for the chaos heart.

cos who ELSE would it be, right??? :o)

*and here comes the obligatory disclaimer that obviously i’m not trying to say that THIS is concrete 100% what the writers meant. i just think this is an interesting interpretation i’d like to explore

[sepublic]

Amelia’s Alzheimer’s?

           From what Owen Dennis told us, Book 5 of Infinity Train would’ve been a movie, covering Amelia’s takeover of the train… Which, I don’t know if Book 5 would’ve gone over her takeover, AND her eventual arc post-Book 3, but; I believe the implication is that like Book 4, this movie would’ve been a pure prequel, set in the past. A good look and further contextualization of Amelia’s past sins and how she got into the headspace she now has, in order to set up for a future Book where she finally gets her proper arc.

           That leaves just three other books… One about Guilt, the next about Revenge, and the last of Acceptance. Book 5 is about Grief fittingly enough, and we know that Book 8 (Acceptance) would’ve delved into a passenger with alzheimer’s, whose condition would’ve kept them from engaging with the Infinity Train’s intended function properly. Owen Dennis mentioned how this final season would’ve been based on his own experiences with his grandfather, who had a similar issue in the past.

           It’s easy to assume that Book 8 would’ve been about a whole new character, which leaves either Books 6 or 7 for the resolution to Amelia’s arc- But what if that’s not the case? The Book 8 protagonist would be pretty old, presumably, so…

           …What if Amelia was the Book 8 protagonist? What if, by the end of the series, Amelia’s age would’ve caught up to her, and she’d start developing alzheimer’s- Further complicating her attempts to get her number down, especially when she can no longer remember Alrick like she used to!

           Think about it- Amelia as the final protagonist would be a neat book-end to the series, given how we began with her as the final antagonist of Book 1. The show starts and ends with Amelia, who alongside One-One and Samantha the Cat (and arguably Randall) are basically the core, central tenet characters of the entire show. The resolution of Infinity Train is the resolution of Amelia, who serves as the passenger most entwined with the train, having once been its conductor even!

           Not only that, but with how Amelia’s character serves as a means of criticizing and showing the fallibility of the Infinity Train, how she’s able to game the system, how she works in a place to criticize One-One’s direction with it… And her having to deal with alzheimer’s could continue that theme of Amelia’s character being a commentary on the flaws of the Infinity Train, if it can’t account for her memory loss!

           Amelia’s memory loss would be difficult to work with, if we’d only gotten to know her in just Book 8; But now we have Books 1, 3, 4, and 5 (at the very least!) to bring background and context to her life-story, and it’s a LONG one too! Setting up Amelia’s past in great detail, going into the intricacies across the entire show… It could be setting up the audience to remember all of this, when Amelia herself can’t- So we can get a better idea of her frustration, of how she ended up here when Amelia herself is confused, etc.! We gain a deep and intimate understanding of Amelia’s past for her, in preparation for the memory loss of Book 8.

           Owen talking about how Book 8 would’ve been based on his own experiences, watching his grandfather deal with amnesia- From a meta sense, the audience could serve Owen’s role! We’re the younger people, watching Amelia, our favorite old lady, grow across the series… We get attached to her, she’s basically like family, so naturally it hits harder to see her lose her memory. It’d be a meta way for Owen to really capture what he experienced in real life, by having the audience take his position when observing the character of Amelia.

           From an in-universe standpoint, perhaps Hazel could serve as the proxy for Owen! She’s more or less Amelia’s daughter in the technical and arguably figurative sense- We don’t know exactly how their relationship would progress, and the last time we had hopes of Found Family for Hazel, it didn’t quite work out… But regardless. Perhaps Hazel, as a kid with relation to the older Amelia, would’ve gotten to grow up with her surrogate caretaker, learn to value and appreciate her and vice-versa; And then we see from Hazel’s pained perspective, the loss of Amelia’s memories. Perhaps Amelia losing her memories of her times with Hazel, even!

           This could tie Amelia and Hazel’s stories together, especially with how linked the two are, with Hazel resulting from Amelia’s failed attempts to bring back Alrick! And Hazel has a few of Amelia’s memories- She remembers taking ballroom dance lessons, because Amelia was drawing upon those memories when trying to recreate Alrick. Hazel could serve as a young guide to comfort Amelia, a genuinely emotional connection, someone who remembers what Amelia can’t, in the absence of Alrick.

           Book 8 would’ve been about Acceptance- AKA the final part of the 5 stages of Grief, when dealing with the death of a loved one… And Grief is the theme of Book 5, Amelia’s origin story! Amelia would accept the death of Alrick at the end of Book 8, and perhaps Hazel could learn to accept the death of Tuba and another family member in Amelia… In the sense that yes, Amelia is leaving her too- But Hazel will learn to move past Tuba’s death, and perhaps her own experience can help Amelia as well. They can grieve for Amelia’s memories, for Alrick, etc.

           It’d also be an interesting and frustrating challenge for Amelia- As someone who no doubt has at least some pride in her intellect and mind, having her own mind start to degrade… It’d really put her into an interesting headspace, and force Amelia into that acceptance of what is inevitable, that some things she really can’t change. And of course, this could deal with theme of acceptance, of how Amelia clings to her past with Alrick; Having her memories of him start to fade could really shake this up, and force her to re-evaluate her life and values, her priorities… Perhaps decide to instead focus on the Now and Future, accepting that her past with Alrick is not only long-gone, but possibly due to be forgotten. That she can love and appreciate what it did for her, but Amelia has no choice but to move on- Even without those memories, without that past, she still has a future with Hazel and everyone else to keep living for.

           For all we know, Samantha the Cat could even come into play here! She’s someone with access to people’s tapes, among them none other than Amelia’s- And before she gave it to Simon, Samantha also had the ability to create new tapes from passengers on the go. Samantha is a long-lived denizen, at least about 150+ years old, she’s lived and seen the entirety of Amelia’s reign, and was likely there since the very beginning; Owen Dennis did allude to Samantha being present in Book 5… Specifically, he suggested that us seeing Samantha kill someone was a possibility, amidst One-One or Amelia committing murder instead; And that of course suggests that, regardless of whether or not the Cat kills someone in Book 5, she’d still be a prevalent character.

           Samantha having that past with Amelia, and her own conniving nature, could possibly lead to her conflicting with Hazel, perhaps recounting memories differently, or trying to tell them in a way that’d sway Amelia to her side, who knows? It’s also worth noting that she’s someone who has regret and loss in Simon… So perhaps if she served as a central cast member for Book 8 (befitting my point about Amelia being a book-ends kind of character), Samantha would’ve learned to accept the death of Simon, and/or help Hazel and Amelia move on as well. It’d be a fitting and appropriate farewell, I believe, to have Amelia and Samantha, two main-stays since the beginning, have their arc at the very end of the series.

           And Hazel? Hazel could be representative of a new generation, to step up and take the mantle passed down. One-One’s own input would be fascinating, because like Samantha and Hazel, he has quite the past with Amelia, and a lot of significance and understanding of her sins. And with his control of the Infinity Train, I can see him attempt to recreate Amelia’s destroyed tape, or even try to create a new tape for her, to try and get around Amelia’s memory loss. The Infinity Train selectively deciding which memories it only thinks are important could lead to disagreement with One-One and conflict, exposing the flaws of the system- And/or, the Infinity Train might come across a roadblock because it can’taccess Amelia’s memories anymore!

           This could be a culmination for One-One’s arc as well, as seeing his failure to account and accommodate Amelia’s alzheimer’s, leads him to decide to make MAJOR reforms to the Infinity Train as a result! Maybe he’ll even stop the whole process of kidnapping passengers (while still letting the denizens function and roam freely). Him and Amelia have an unusual, kind of at-odds but not really, sort of frenemy relationship; They’re working together, they’ve been enemies, they’ve collaborated, each was the reigning conductor at one point. We could have Samantha as someone with negative recollections of her time with Amelia, One-One with overall netural ones, and Hazel with positive associations! Three different people with different pasts and interactions with Amelia, to provide their own input on their time with her, and thus help her rediscover her past…

           …Or, at the very least- Come to terms and accept who she is, and finally move on. And, it goes without saying that Amelia’s dilemma with her huge number could be complicated by her Alzheimer’s, if she can’t remember things- And it’d be interesting to see how it might fluctuate, if at all. Perhaps Amelia’s progress actually gets pretty good, but THEN the memory loss begins to kick in, and that frustrates her. It’d teach the lesson that progress is not linear, that sometimes you might backtrack, you might think you’re so close, only to have retread the same path… And sometimes you’re tired of the journey and just want to get to the destination, to the final stop at the end of the railroad. We could have Amelia learn to accept help from others, to not try and seize control for herself as all-powerful Conductor, to gain some humility amidst her pride in her own ability and intellect…

           We could have Amelia awkwardly navigate the train without her memories, stumbling across and slowly figuring out what needs to be done in order to lower her number, with just the number’s movement as an indicator, and no memories to work off of! Her only hints are whenever her number moves to a certain situation, so Amelia really has to work backwards… Through trial and error, figure out what needs to be done; Perhaps a callback to Grace and Simon, who had no guidance and struggled with figuring out what their numbers expected of them.

          It’d be an interesting book-end to THAT point, especially since it was Amelia who unknowingly contributed to Grace misinterpreting the function of her number, so then having Amelia rectify this with herself, learning to properly figure out what her number means, and then accepting that without going into denial like Simon did… It’d really show the growth of her, but also the series, and of course the fact that Grace and Simon were literal kids, and Amelia is a seasoned adult. And of course, there’s the existential questions, if Amelia is a different person without her memories, if those sins still apply if she can’t remember them anymore, if she’s essentially disconnected and detached, etc.

          We might see Amelia operate without any memories of her grief with Alrick, see how she is without that- And it might concern and frustrate Amelia, because she could conflate moving past Alrick, as being the same as getting rid of him truly… And the memory loss certainly doesn’t help. Who is she without her memories? It could lead to an identity crisis that echoes back to Book 2’s themes. Amelia without memories might learn to rediscover herself by looking into her past, perhaps existing without recollection, just this number she slowly figures out how to lower. Perhaps having a new, more detached/objective look at her own past, from a perspective as someone who doesn’t remember them, so it feels like the recollections of a stranger- It might contribute to Amelia really coming to terms with happened, with herself, and finally Acceptance.

           It really could be the culmination of the series; With how the age of protagonists for each Book gets progressively older, Amelia’s elderly age and Alzheimer’s would’ve been the end of the line, the final stop/destination for the train. It’d make Amelia the central Passenger of the show, who we’ve been following since Book 1, watching her progress, in a sense seeing her grow up- And then finally seeing her grow old and suffer from Alzheimer’s. The journey of the Infinity Train could be the journey of Amelia, from her boarding the train, to the final destination, literally and figuratively. It could tie into the arcs of Hazel, Samantha, and One-One, and finally deconstruct the Infinity Train with an outsider who did exactly like that!

           What do you guys think? I think it’d be quite the experience to watch Amelia grow and struggle as a person, so it really does feel personal and intimate to us, when we know her memories, only for Amelia herself to lose them... A fascinating, bittersweet study and journey of Amelia, but one we accept, because the journey made the destination worthwhile.

[passable-talent]

May I perhaps request a part 8 for the dai li series? I'm very very hype for what's to come for the finale!

should’ve figured this would happen within 20 min

ya boi returns after a week of classes with significantly better mental health! not enough to make me think I’ll be here more often than I have, but enough to give me the passion i need to f u c k i n g d e l i v e r 

and now...

THE MOMENT YOUVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR

| part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 |

The day of Sozin’s Comet.

The comet tore its way across the sky behind Appa, vaporizing clouds and turning the sky blood red, as though it knew the terror and destruction it was meant to bring. Seated in Appa’s saddle behind Katara and Zuko, you looked over his tail at it, its brightness in the sky that rivaled the sun. You wondered when it would behind to effect firebenders- you wondered if Zuko could already feel it. 

“Zuko, don’t worry,” said Katara, catching the anxiety you had noticed slipping off of him like waves. “We can take Azula.”

“I’m not worried about her,” Zuko said, “I’m worried about Aang. What if he doesn’t have the guts to take out my father?” You made brief eye contact with Katara before moving forward, getting closer to the conversation. 

“What if he loses?” Zuko’s voice was clear in its trepidation. 

“Aang won’t lose,” Karata said, confidence in her tone. “He’s gonna come back. He has to.” You put your hand on her shoulder, settling down on your knees between the two of them. 

“Of course he will,” you said, looking over your shoulder once again at the comet. “He wouldn’t let us face Ozai without him.” Zuko caught his reaction before it made its way to his face, controlling it. But all the same, he had to wonder- had he even told you his father’s name? And referring to him as ‘Ozai’, rather than ‘the Firelord’- a disrespect that even some of the others of the team hadn’t done. 

None of the three of you wore armor. What would metal do against fire, anyway? You wore the uniform of a Dai Li student, or what had once been. Its long, loose sleeves had been ripped at your biceps and the baggy pants ripped just below your knees, so that all that was left to be recognized was the symbol of Ba Sing Se on your chest, and the gold trim as it hung at your waist. If you were going to win the war, today, you’d do it for your home city. 

You didn’t wear shoes. 

“There’s the palace,” Katara said, leaning forward to get as good a look at the courtyard as she could. “It’s almost empty.”

“Except for Azula,” you said, narrowing your eyes as though that would help you see. “And those guys.”

“Those are the Fire Sages. Everyone else is either with the fleet or at home, waiting for the victory,” Zuko said, his normal brand of anger yet nonchalance gracing his voice. Drawing closer, the words of the Fire Sages drifted up to where you could hear them, high on Appa’s back. 

“By decree of Phoenix King Ozai, I now crown you Firelord-” he hands swung down to place the crown in Azula’s hair, but he paused, noticing Appa beside one of the towers. Appa bellowed as he approached, and Azula’s words were lost beneath the sound. Appa landed at the steps of the palace, and Zuko stood. 

“Sorry, but you’re not going to become Firelord today.” He leapt down, leaving you and Katara on the saddle. “I am.” Azula’s laugh ground on your ears, shivering you to the bone. She looked... unkempt. 

“You’re hilarious.” Katara approached Zuko’s side, and you flanked his other. 

“And you’re going down,” she levied against Azula, and you couldn’t help but find a smile sliding to your face. Azula has had this coming, just like you said to Iroh only hours ago. You were happy that you got to be a part of the force that took her down, after all the pain she had brought into your life. She was a monster. 

“Wait,” Azula said, stopping the head sage from placing the headpiece on her, “You want to be Firelord?” She stood, and walked toward the edge of the stairs. You didn’t like standing beneath her. “Fine. Let’s settle this. Just you and me, brother.” She spat the word with contempt that you wanted to wipe right off of her face. “The showdown that was always meant to be- Agni Kai!” 

“You’re on,” Zuko growled before you could even react. You turned your head, noticing Katara had done the same. 

“Zuko-” you said, concern in your voice. You’d come all this way to help, and Katara had too, and now he was going to take her on without you? 

“What are you doing? She’s playing you,” Katara said, narrowing her eyes. “She knows she can’t take all three of us, so she’s trying to separate us.” You wanted to reach out and take his hand, as though to pull him toward reason, but something held you back. You stole a glance at Azula, and the sick, gloating smile on her face. 

“I know,” Zuko said, and your eyes widened slightly, surprised that he knew the trap but still walked into it. “But I can take her this time.”

“But even you admitted to your uncle that you would need help facing Azula.”

“Zuko, that’s why we’re here for you,” you added, finally breaking your gaze from the princess. 

“There’s something off about her,” he said, “I can’t explain it, but she’s slipping.” It was like you could feel her gaze on the side of your head as you looked at her brother, like you could feel her weighing her decisions, like she did back in Ba Sing Se, when she manipulated you and Zuko both. It made you shiver. 

“And this way,” Zuko said, reaching out and taking your hand while he looked at Katara, “no one else has to get hurt.” You squeezed his hand, tightly, before letting go and circling him to Katara’s side. The courtyard before the steps of the palace were cleared, and the two siblings took up positions facing away from each other. You stood with Katara, not far from Zuko. It may have been against the rules, but still you wanted to stand by, in case you needed to interfere and help him. You were sure Katara felt the same way. 

Slowly, the siblings stood, what felt like miles separating them. 

“I’m sorry it has to end this way, brother,” Azula said in a near snarl, slicking her robe from her shoulders and discarding it to the ground. Zuko stood steadfast in his ready stance, calm. 

“No you’re not.”

Azula took up her ready stance, and before you knew it, the battle had begun. 

Until this moment, you hadn’t seen firebending under the influence of Sozin’s Comet. You understood the effect it was supposed to have had, but the pure size of the awful flames was something you could never have predicted, nor truly understood, if it weren’t for this moment, this amazing and intense shot of flame Azula conjured, her blue contrasting the sky and sun of dark red, and Zuko’s return, his bright yellows and oranges filling your vision and blocking Azula. The impact of the powers of the siblings created a wall that bisected the entirety of the palace grounds, and the heat and wind pushed your hair from your face. 

From the fading wall burst Azula’s fire, four waves of flame accompanying her movements, and as Zuko split and deflected each one, you kept your eye on him. His footwork. His stance. He had learned from Aang, just a bit- don’t go straight to the attack. Weave with your partner. He had absolute control, but still your fists flexed, making the ground roll beneath your exposed toes. Your feet were firmly planted to the ground, so even when you blinked, you could follow the fight. 

The two traded blows, their deflected flames launching up and out of the courtyard, coloring the clouds. Azula’s misfires tore through homes and set rooftops ablaze. Zuko’s blast toward her was matched, and as he adjusted his position it moved past him, a wall of cyan sliding past a wall of amber. Planting a foot to the floor, you rocked your fist up, a wall erupting from the stone floor to split Azula’s blaze in front of you and Katara. For the moment, you huddled together, watching as the fire circled you like a predator before disappearing. Quickly, you shot it down into its place, and once again took your eyes to the battle. The front of the palace was ablaze, and in a rage, Azula leapt toward Zuko, raining down on top of him what looked like a whip of fire. Planting his stance, he split it, a pathway opening straight from him to his sister. You recognized that move- Toph had taught it to you. 

Azula was on one knee, collecting herself, and from far away it looked like she was breathing hard. Zuko, on the other hand, stood strong, and steady. He moved toward her two interwoven streams of flame that roared and grew as they moved, which she slid out from beside. You couldn’t look away, even as tears fought to moisten your eyes from their onslaught of heat. Azula gave him a sloppy attack, and so he did what you could only describe as ascending, rising on a pillar of fire until he could swing an arc at her as he fell back down, splitting her next offense. 

She swung around him, weaving, and he stood his ground, protecting himself. But he sensed the weakness that you could not see- as long as she was sliding on her flames, as long as she wasn’t connected to the ground, he could break her root. He sent a wave of flame in all directions that broke up her fire, and sent her crashing to the ground. 

She collected herself up, her hair fallen from its updo, fluttering around her and into her eyes. She had a madness in those eyes, a bloodthirst, but her stance was weak and her back hunched, like something was giving out beneath her. 

“No lightning today?” You heard Zuko taunt. “What’s’a matter? Afraid I’ll redirect it?” He brought himself into an offensive stance, and, sensing danger, Katara ran closer. You followed, remembering your last run-in with Azula’s lightning. The night Aang died. 

“Oh, I’ll show you lightning!” Azula snarled, and, following your instincts, you pushed Katara behind you. Rock would fare better against lightning than water. 

With movements to her right, then her left, Azula collected her lightning, thunder echoing off of walls and mountainsides and clouds all around you. Through the earth you felt as Zuko took a deep breath, his heartbeat calm, but your eyes remained on the princess. 

She gathered her two fingers to her chest, readying to fire. But then, you saw her eyes land on you.

Sometimes, a person sees a million moments pass in less than one. 

You saw her stance pivot to you, and her arm extend toward you and Katara. But she wasn’t targeting Katara- she knew what you were, and what you had become. You had become a weakness, not in yourself, but in Zuko, and she had seen it in the way you looked at him in Ba Sing Se, and she had seen it in the way he had reached for your hand at the steps of the palace. You had endangered Katara, and so with the world moving by at the pace of a million moments in less than one, you launched forward to plant both feet, sweeping your arms from your sides and in, up, and from the tiles began to rise a wall. 

And you saw, at a pace of a million moments in less than one, the way that Zuko ran between you and the lightning, the blue of it drowning out any other color. The strength in your arms faded, and the wall in front of you, meant to protect you and Katara, vaporized to sand, and crumbled back to the ground. Zuko absorbed the lightning, and shot it out above the walls of the volcano. 

There he was left, then, trembling. 

“Zuko!” you shouted, and Katara the same, both of you meaning to run toward him. But Azula reminded you that she was still a threat by slamming the ground in front of you with lightning, and you snapped your gaze to her. 

Once, in a cavern deep beneath a palace in Ba Sing Se, Azula had come between you and Zuko. And that day, you’d been too scared- you were a kid who had never seen war. You weren’t ready to attack, and if you were, maybe that day would’ve changed how the war played out. Once, in a cavern deep beneath a palace in Ba Sing Se, you’d failed to keep Zuko from his sister. 

It wouldn’t happen again. 

You let out a scream and lifted a dozen boulders from the tiled ground, launching them at the princess, each in turn. Her laughter grated against your skin and you’d never moved with such rage in your bones before, the strain on your joints nothing compared to your heartbreak. Your hair and clothes whipped around you, put to the test by the speed with which you were moving. And yet, Azula alluded you. 

“Y/N!” Katara called, and you wisened up for just long enough to realize that she was all too used to fighting off a rage-fueled attacker. You weren’t going to win this way, and now, winning was up to Katara and you. One more shot you pressed toward her, and using that as a distraction, you knocked her from her path with a stone launched from just beside her. It gave you enough time to slip with Katara from the battlefield into the awning-filled pavilions nearby. 

You could barely keep your legs from turning you back to where Zuko still lay. 

Azula brought her fire down from behind the pavilion where you and Katara had taken shelter, and so she chased you out, back toward the open yard. Katara made a break for Zuko, covering her hand in water so she could heal him, and as you ran, you threw your open hands down toward the ground, walls slicing up beside him, hopefully to keep him safe. But your path was interrupted by Azula’s flame, her laughter rocking your core as she conjured lightning, and so you shot back a boulder to divert her long enough for you and Katara to put just a bit more distance between you and her.

Still, her lightning caught up to you, and the explosion sent you both flying. Katara rolled, and you brought up a platform to land on properly. Azula landed on a nearby rooftop, giddy smiles on her face. 

“I’d really rather our family physician look after little Zu-zu, if you don’t mind!” Her voice gave you pause, even as you launched to the side to avoid her lightning. What, really, was she doing, attacking her own brother? What had brought her to being the bloodthirsty murderer she was so prepared to become?

More flame chased Katara as she joined you behind a pillar, and you stomped your heel to the floor to raise even another wall between you and where Azula had just been. 

“Zu-zu, you don’t look so good!” Azula snarled, and with her scream sent another bolt of lightning to Katara, the crack of thunder nearly deafening you as it split you from her, sending you in opposite directions. 

After all that, though, when choosing who Azula would go after, who Azula would see as a threat, it wasn’t you. She went for Katara, and after a moment, you realized her goal- Katara was the only one, now, who could save Zuko’s life. And so you slipped to the side, running between columns, one eye on Azula and the other on Zuko. Katara froze both her and the princess in place, and immediately you knew who would come out the winner. You bolted to Zuko’s side, your feet carrying you shakily, until you crashed to your knees beside him. You lowered the walls you’d put up around him and rolled him to his back, finally laying eyes on the deep, raw wound on his stomach. 

“Stay still,” you ordered him, extending one foot out to ground yourself, and you punched the tile in order to raise up a platform underneath him, where Katara could hope to work better. Shaking hands extended toward his face, and those tears that once tried to protect your eyes from the heat now tried to protect them from something far, far worse- the pain in Zuko’s expression. 

“It’s gonna be okay,” you promised him, even as he flinched and groaned, even as your voice shook, even as you slowly cupped his face. The sound of a crash of water made you look over your shoulder, and the sight you found was relieving- Katara chaining Azula to the ground. 

“It’s gonna be okay,” you promised again, your voice shaking even as this time, you knew you weren’t lying. Katara was there only a moment later, water already coating her hands, ready to press it down into his wound. It began to glow, and you watched as Zuko’s face first flexed with more pain, then relaxed. A tearful smile crossed your face and a small sob escaped your lungs, and he looked first to you, then to Katara. 

“Thank you, Katara,” he said, taking a deep breath, and settling his muscles down onto the stone beneath him. 

Azula had been defeated. Zuko was to be Firelord. For the moment, the world was triumphant, and you saw him smile. You’d waited a thousand moments for this one, right here, when everything was okay, and when he was safe. 

You’d waited a thousand moments, but in this one, you couldn’t remember the ones where he’d hurt you, where you’d hated him. You couldn’t remember the ones filled with pain, and anger, the ones in which you walked away from him in anger, or threw up a wall between the two of you, or yelled at him. You couldn’t remember the ones in which he hadn’t done what you’d needed him to, or in which you had kept yourself at arms length. 

All you could remember where the moments that truly brought you to this one, right here. 

Finally, you leaned down, and you kissed him. 

Your fingers slid into his hair at the back of his head, and cupped his head away from the hard stone beneath him. Your eyes closed, all you could do was feel, your instep pressed to the ground beneath you, your lips pressing against his. And you didn’t want him to move, to push himself, but he did cup your face, letting his fingertips feel into your scalp, as your hair fell down past your cheekbones. 

When you parted, for a moment, you couldn’t do anything but stare. 

“I love you,” you said, and a smile pulled at his lips. 

“I love you, too.” 

You brought your legs to your side to help him sit up, and then stand, one of your arms around his waist. Seemingly overwhelmed by her brother’s total victory, Azula truly fell, tears and screams leaving her while she flailed and spit fire. Finally, as you stood in front of her, in her truest, basest form, you recognized what you had never, any time you’d faced her. 

She was never in control. She was just scared, and finally, she’d been beaten, just like she always feared. 

Katara looked away. You couldn’t bring yourself to. 

~~~

As you took Zuko into the palace to rest, Katara traversed the palace city, putting out fires. It would take work, but the city would be inhabitable again, once Zuko took the throne. He had a lot of recovering to do, but by the time the world had gathered for his coronation, he was well enough to walk on his own, and to kneel to receive the crown. Still, though, he had trouble reaching behind himself to put on his robes. 

Luckily, you were always there to help him. 

“So I suppose, after all this, you’re going to go home,” he said as you lifted his clothing to his shoulders. 

“Hmm?”

“Back to Ba Sing Se. I know you miss it.” A small smile graced your lips, but you shook your head as you smoothed the wrinkles across his shoulders. 

“I do. I miss the city, but it hasn’t been my home. Not for a long time.” You circled around Zuko to take his hand just beside him, regarding him with a warm expression, warmth toward him that you could only match with a few moments before. 

“I thought I made it clear that this- right here-” you lifted his hand, interlocked with yours, up to his sight. “-This is my home.” He brought your hand down so that he could lean into a kiss, and you could enjoy it only for a moment before you had to pull away. 

“I’ve got to go,” you said, a bright smile on your face. “Toph saved my seat, and Aang is waiting for you!” You rushed to the door, a small exit that wouldn’t be noticed by the crowd gathered out front, but you paused. “Good luck,” you said, giving him an honest and traditional Fire Nation bow. 

“Your Highness.” 

-🦌 Roe

tag list: @furblrwurblr @eridanuswave @bernadineisreborn @angxlicwanda @celamoon @mywigglybaby @silentwhispofhope @the-girl-in-the-box @mavix @eury-dice3 @ninipoo1 @bigbuckyenergy @lucensei @srgania @uncovered-mad-man @11mb0 @deansbbysblog @pillowjj @ilovespideyyy @heavensgaymenace @thearachna-kid @llama2264 @anime-simp @akariblue @lostgirlheart @kacchasu @ctrl-alt-jeon @tadpoledancer @i-bitch-you-bitch @wetleafwrites @lammello @oddment-niwit-blubber-tweak @kittyddandnyla @smol-vy @lana-isabelle @doomedcampesinos @luleck @izzieserra @little-miss-sleep-deprived @poofyhairuwu @astroninaaa @littleladdty @davnwillcome @flourish-and-bloggs @heavensgaymenace @obnoxioussmiley @thyunnamed @harmlessoffering @j-ma26-rb @happyseadreams

[winterscaptain]

infirmity.

Aaron Hotchner x Gender Neutral Reader

a/n: part four of our 100 arc, covering 5x02, haunted! I forgot how much i love this episode, so i really leaned into this one. it’s a labor of love!! i can’t wait to hear what you all think (i crave feedback and affection) and if you reblog, i’d love to see your cheeky lil thoughts in the tags!!

an ajf fic arc that happily stands on its own! one | two | three | four | five | six | seven | eight | nine | ten | eleven

words: 4.3k warnings: language, bad decisions

summary: “a friend should bear his friend’s infirmities” - william shakespeare, julius caesar.

masterlist | a joyful future masterlist | requests closed!

You knock on the door at 8:30 sharp. Almost thirty seconds pass before he answers, and you note the hand on his holster as he opens the door. 

“Hey.”

“Hi,” you chirp. “Ready to go?”

He turns, gathering his things. “What do we know about this case in Kentucky?”

Thrown a little by the lack of greeting, you follow him into the apartment. The sight of the Foyet files on his desk aren’t foreign to you, nor are they a surprise. They’ve been there every time you came over during his leave (in fact, you’ve sat on them more than once), so why you expected them to go away once he was back you had no idea.

“Um, no connection between Call and his victims. They’re canvassing, but no sign of him so far.”

“Start with his recent history. Find the stressor.” His voice is flat, impassive, and you frown. 

He was just getting better…

You’re about to head back toward the door when -

“Don’t move.”

Right. The alarm. 

He stands by to arm it. “Ready?”

“Are you?”

+++

You arrive at the tarmac, Hotch in the passenger seat of your car. He looks a little resigned, but straightens and takes a breath before he opens the door, settling into his role as he steps out and straightens his suit jacket. 

It’s always a little funny to watch him transform. You’re honored you get to see it, even if he’s in rough shape. 

Especially then. 

You climb the stairs and follow him in, settling in your usual place. 

“Good to see you,” Dave says as Aaron scoots down the aisle. It makes you smile. 

“You, too.”

Aaron gets settled and you shift, trying not to hover but finding it difficult to be separated from him after his weeks of absence. He greets the rest of the team, exchanging pleasantries and checking in with Reid about his knee. 

“Any other attacks?”

JJ shakes her head, while Spencer elaborates. “Call’s proven hard to track. He’s never had a driver's license so he’s probably still on foot.”

“Or public transportation,” Emily notes.

You hum. “He wouldn’t take the bus. His face is everywhere.”

“Has anyone found a stressor?” You weren’t sure if Aaron’s brusque affect was going to continue once you made it to the plane, but his tone just about answers your question. 

Stepping back into authority quickly, there, Aaron. 

“He just lost his job,” Garcia supplies. “He’s worked at a factory since 1990. Made appliances since forever and not a single promotion.”

Derek tilts his head. “That’s a long time to be bitter.”

“Or he doesn’t care?”

JJ looks at Spencer and shakes her head. “Not if he’s got a family to feed.” 

“Actually, he’s of the hermit variety as far as I can tell. He’s got no one. No wife, no kids, no parents.” You watch Garcia’s eyes flicker around the screen as she talks to you, doing what she does best. 

“Nothing to live for.”  Derek’s looking a little too pointedly at Aaron for your taste, but your evaluation is interrupted. 

“So why hasn’t he killed himself yet?”

Your brain sputters at Aaron’s offhand delivery. “What?”

“Sprees usually end in suicide. If he’s got nothing to live for, why hasn’t he ended it?”

The energy in the room grows uncomfortable, fast. Aaron’s voice is still flat - you might go so far as to say it sounds dead, but that inspires a kind of heavy sullenness in your chest you’d rather not subject yourself to. 

You wish Haley was around for no other reason but to kick his ass. 

You’re thankful for Spencer when he answers Hotch’s question. “Because he isn’t finished, yet. We know he has displaced anger. He took it out on the first victim.”

“Well,” Aaron continues, “the stock boy represents someone. We need to know who.”

You meet Derek’s eyes and you can tell he’s trying to read you - trying to see if you’re as concerned as he is. You don’t give him the satisfaction. 

+++

Later, you corner Morgan on the plane before landing, keeping your voice low. The case is in your lap so there’s a valid distraction when you need one. 

“What’s wrong with you?”

He stops and turns. “I thought Hotch was cleared to drive.” 

“He is.”

“Then why did you pick him up this morning?”

You shrug. “I wanted to.” His eyes bore into the side of your head and you look up with an exasperated huff. “What?”

He sighs. “He’s only had a month off.”

“Well,” you say, aware that you’re being pedantic before you even get there, “thirty-four days. That’s a little more than a month.”

His stare is withering, but you’re impervious. “And you think that’s long enough?”

“Are you asking me as his coworker or as his friend?”

“Is there a difference?”

You shrug. “Maybe.” Yes. “But if you don’t think he’s had enough time, you should tell him.”

He scoffs. “No thanks. I like my job.”

“You like him more.” A little smile crosses your face. “Though, I know you don’t like to think so.”

“No. I like you.” Derek corrects. “He also happens to like you, so I tolerate him for your benefit.”

“Much appreciated.” You return to your work, but Derek’s eyes linger. You don’t look up as you ask, “What?”

“What if he has PTSD?”

Still writing, you answer with a general air of nonchalance. “He was evaluated.”

“Oh, come on. We wrote those questions. Hotch knows exactly -“

You slam your pen down and lean back with your arms crossed. You draw Spencer's eyes and lower your voice again. “So, what? Are you going to pick at me until you get me to say something you want me to say?” You let out a sardonic chuff, settling back to work. “If that’s the case, you’re gonna be here a while.” You tip your head a little toward the little table by the window. “Your coffee’s getting cold.”

You admittedly feel a little bad for being short with him, but everything seems to be testing your patience today. 

And if you’re honest, you’re worried about Aaron, too. 

After a few minutes of work in silence, you call out to him again. There’s the smallest of apologies in your voice. “Derek?”

He looks at you, dark eyes open and yielding - concerned and forgiving. “Yeah?”

“He’s back because he has to be. He needs to know we’re here for him.”

“He knows that.”

You offer him a small smile. “Don’t let him forget it.” You pause, your head wavering a little bit as your tone turns a touch facetious. “I can’t do all the heavy lifting around here.”

You get a laugh out of him - just a little one - and it’s enough. “Don’t push it, kid. I remember when you were dead weight.”

You roll your eyes. 

That’s enough, for now. 

+++

Even your seemingly-endless patience with Aaron rapidly wanes as you spend more time at the crime scene. It’s frustrating. 

“He was on an antipsychotic?” You ask with a little frown. 

The pharmacist nods. “Well, that’s why I wanted him to calm down. He’s been off of them at least a month, now.” 

“And when were you going to tell us this?” Aaron asks, harsh and sharp. 

You look at him, your frown deepening. 

What the fuck is that attitude?

“He’s armed, he’s delusional. Who’s his doctor?” Hotch’s tone grows even pointier, somehow, as he pushes harder. 

“I don’t remember - my computer…” She gestures behind the desk, where the computer has been fried by a bullet. 

“Great. That’s great.” He walks away, already making a call. 

“Excuse us,” you say in an attempt to recover. Derek echoes you and you try to avoid running after Hotch as he strides down the aisle. 

Long-legged asshole. Slow down. 

“Hotch,” you call. He doesn’t listen. 

“Call JJ and tell her about the meds.” He’s still walking. You’ve caught up. 

Derek chimes in, gesturing back at the pharmacist. “This is not her fault.”

Aaron turns on him. “Morgan, he’s in a psychotic break. It changes everything.”

“You want to talk about this?” Derek asks, taking another step closer. 

Squaring up to Derek’s shoulder, you’re ready to pull them apart if they get really heated. 

Wouldn’t be the first time.

In some ways, Morgan’s admission on the plane was truer than he let on. You are the link between Derek and Aaron, almost like a balm. You see things in them that they can’t see in each other. It helps. 

With a pang, you think of Haley, for some reason. 

You miss her. 

“No.” Aaron’s interruption is sharp and it startles you out of your thoughts. “I want to find him - Garcia,” he turns, continuing on his warpath forward, “he’s been off his antipsychotic for a month. What else did you miss?”

Your mouth drops open and Derek’s about to deck Aaron while his back is turned. You push in front of Derek, getting between them to give him a chance to cool off. The last thing you want is to handle more wound dressings - for either one of them. 

Aaron hangs up and walks out after what you imagine is a rather unilluminating update from Penelope. You turn, putting your hand on Derek’s shoulder and looking him in the eye. 

Still think he’s alright? His eyes ask.

 You grit your teeth. I don’t know. 

+++

The psychiatrist and patient lay dead on the floor, Call nowhere in sight. Derek directs the local officers to check the perimeter, just in case. 

You look at Hotch, who still doesn’t look completely checked in, himself. 

Or maybe he looks too checked in?

I don’t know. 

You’d be lying if you said his behavior didn’t freak you out. Though he’s standing beside you, you miss him. 

Come back to me. 

You miss the man who pliantly sat under your hands as you washed his wounds and brought him takeout and forced him to take naps in the middle of the afternoon on a weekday. 

You miss the man who fought you for the remote and stole far too many of your fries, who would change the channel if you made the mistake of going to the bathroom on a commercial break. 

That man was with you as late as Saturday. Returning has brought something else out in him, the part of him that spent (often very) late nights looking for Foyet has risen to the forefront. 

“We’re too late.” 

Before the rest of you can do anything, Aaron leaves the room, pushing past Dave in his haste to leave. 

Emily calls after him, but he’s long gone down the hallway. They look at you. 

All you can do is shake your head with a downturned curve of your mouth. 

+++

After a little while, you go downstairs and find Hotch outside. Before you can say anything - 

“I should have seen the blinking on the video.” 

You huff at him. “Hotch, it could have been a nervous tic. You couldn’t have known - none of the records were available, yet.” 

“But it wasn’t a tic. It’s a classic sign of long-term antipsychotic use, and I missed it.”

You step in front of him, squarely meeting his eyes. “We all missed it.” 

He’s got another pessimistic jab that you choose to ignore just before Emily and Dave arrive with news from Garcia. 

Oh, Aaron. 

+++

The officer huffs. “I don’t care why he took him.” 

Aaron had, once again, escalated the situation with local police. Tensions are high, and you only hope he can get his shit together at some point. “You should.” 

Goddamn it, Aaron. 

He continues, advancing on the police captain. “Call’s memory is no longer suppressed. He’s reinventing his past and unless we understand how, we’re not going to find either of them.”

“Well, I’m not gonna just sit around and speculate.” 

It’s an old-fashioned Western standoff, now. 

Who’s Clint Eastwood?

Well, Hotch has the looks but -

Quit. 

Fine. 

“Then don’t.”

The captain turns to you, Emily, and Dave. “You don’t think we should chase him either?”

“We need to get ahead of Call,” Dave answers evenly. 

The captain looks at Aaron once more before storming off. The rest of you approach Hotch, and Emily’s a little frustrated when she reminds him, “There’s a kid missing.” 

“They don’t need the extra manpower.” 

You squint at him. “Since when?”

“If we had studied Foyet’s initial crimes -”

Oh for the love of fuck. 

“- we would have known that a survivor didn’t make sense.”

“What does he have to do with this?”

Great question, Emily.

“All we had to do was stop and look at Foyet’s history. But we didn’t, and we lost two couples and a bus full of people. I am not making that mistake again.” He leaves the three of you stunned in his wake. After a moment, you follow him. 

You always do. 

+++

“Let’s go.” 

You’ve got the address to the unsub’s home and you take the car with Aaron, the rest of the team following behind you. 

He drives fast, but that’s nothing new. He throws the siren and floors it. You call SWAT yourself, getting Derek prepared for staging. 

When you get out of the car, you throw your vest on, helping Emily with the straps across her shoulders before she can reach them themselves. 

“Prentiss,” Aaron says, putting his earwig in. “Check in with the lieutenant, see if there’s anything we can use.” 

She nods. “Yes, sir.” 

“You good?” You ask, looking over at him. 

“Yeah, I’m good.” 

You throw your head to the side, and he takes your flank as you get closer to Emily. Her briefing with this particular lieutenant could go sideways, but you don’t want to leave him feeling trapped. 

“...The kid’s in there. We got this. Tactical teams are covering the exits. He’s still focused on the old man.”

Emily squints, adjusting her comm. “For now, but we’re gonna have to figure out the safest way to get that kid out.”

“I’ve got a team in the back and one on the way. We’re going to infiltrate.” 

“You do that and someone else dies.” The balance of firm and collaborative rests delicately on her tone. She’s doing well. 

“Either Call or a child murder. Flip a coin.” 

His tone frustrates you, but you leave Emily to her devices, checking your magazines for the third time. Your sidearm is in place, as is your backup. 

“It doesn’t have to end like that. We get a confession out of Jarvis and he goes away, and Call gets his answers. No one else has to die.” She pauses, and a streak of white flashes in your peripheral. “Hotch!” 

You whirl, ready to sprint after him as he walks decisively past the rest of you, past the gate, and into the house. After a moment’s hesitation, you make a break for it. A wall of arms stops you, and you know Derek’s behind you when you hear, “What the hell is he doing?”

No vest...Is he even carrying his gun? 

“Let him go.” 

You turn on Dave, your face plastered with fear and fury. “What do you mean let him go. Rossi -”

“I’m not letting him go in there solo.” Derek pushes against Dave again, but to your surprise, he’s locked in tight. 

“We have to trust him.” 

That cools Derek off, but not you. You thrash, freeing yourself from one of the local cops. “The hell we do.” 

“Kid - wait, no.” The roles reverse, and Derek catches up to you and locks you in his arms before you can breach the perimeter. Your elbows don’t land against his vest, but you sure try. “You’ll get him killed.” 

There’s only stress and silence as you stop struggling. All you can do is wait. 

Derek keeps his arm around you, but you almost feel like the contact is for both of you. You take deep breaths, trying to slow your heart rate. It’s through the roof. 

“What’s he doing?” Emily asks into her mic. 

Dave leans into his comm. “Stalling.” 

You can almost feel Derek’s jaw tightening. “He has nothing to lose.” 

He has everything to lose. 

You have everything to lose. 

Don’t be a hero, Aaron. Don’t do anything stupid. 

You hope that he can hear you somehow. 

Too late. 

Hotch appears in the window, followed by the boy. 

There’s a quick SWAT conversation in your ear. 

“Do you have the shot?”

“Negative, negative.”

He’s blocking the shot. 

Goddamn you, Aaron. Goddamn you. 

“Bringing the boy out,” a faceless voice on the radio says. The hostage runs down off the porch and you catch a glimpse of Aaron before he disappears behind the door again. 

You turn your head a touch, keeping your eyes on the door. “Get him out of there.” 

Dave shakes his head. “That’s his call.” 

Your body is wound tighter than a coil and you’re not sure if you’re ready to storm in there or just start walking home. 

There’s a gunshot, and you’re out of there like a bat out of hell. You launch yourself over the short fence and attach yourself to the first SWAT agent you see, remembering your training at the last moment. 

You breach the house and find Aaron cuffing Darin, whose father is dead in the armchair in front of him. Your jaw has never been tighter. 

Once you confirm that he is in fact still alive and still only has nine holes in him, you turn on your heel and you storm out of the house. You don’t stop until you’re leaning on the front of one of the cars, trying to catch your breath. Your hands shake and you don’t trust your knees to hold you up. 

The relief wars with something hot and unpleasant, leaving you more exhausted than you’ve been in weeks. 

You keep your head turned away from Aaron as he approaches you. It’s petty, but you also don’t want him to see the fear on your face. 

He calls you with a sigh in his voice and it finally ignites the fear into anger. 

“I can’t fucking believe you,” you spit. Your voice isn’t loud, but it certainly carries. JJ’s eyes flicker to you from the other side of the yard. “What kind of stunt are you trying to pull? Are you trying to get yourself killed?” 

His jaw tightens. “Let’s not do this here.” 

Your brow draws across your eyes and your mouth opens, indignant. “Let’s not do this here? You’re fucking kidding me.”

In his current state, nothing is off the table. His temper is running short and you know you’re capable of pushing him until he breaks. It hasn’t happened yet, but today might be it.  

Much to your surprise, a sigh leaves him, and he knows he’s stepped in it. “It was stupid. I’m sorry.”

You scoff, shaking your head. 

His remorse only stokes your anger. Go figure. 

“You’re sorry? You’re sorry. You could have died, Hotch. What you did was so beyond protocol I don’t even know if I should start with the necessity of your life because we need you as our unit chief or the importance of your safety as my friend -” You cut yourself off and look away from him, frustrated you even got that far. 

He has nothing to say to that. You’re completely right. The guilt might as well be written across his face in Sharpie. 

His absence fucked with you, to say the least. It felt awful, empty, in the field without him. And then when you were home - well, back at the apartment, he was only ever in pain. 

Overall, your anxiety regarding his health and safety is riding high. 

Much to your frustration, your eyes water, and your lower lip shakes - angry tears an ever-present threat. Your arms cross over your chest. “I can’t even look at you right now.” 

He reaches out for your arm, but you throw him off before he can make contact, turning your head. You stare at the ground, watching him flounder out of the corner of your eye. 

“Go. Go do your fucking job, Hotch.” His nickname is acid in your mouth. It feels like a punishment, a lash of a whip. He doesn’t move, and you turn on him, meeting his guilty brown eyes with your flinty ones. “Go. Make the arrest. They’re waiting on you.” You throw your chin to Derek and Emily, who are indeed waiting for him on the porch with the unsub. 

With another heavy sigh, he turns and rejoins the rest of your team. 

You stay where you are, directing coroner and local law enforcement personnel to relevant staging areas as the crime scene is processed and handled. Aaron’s eyes try to find yours, but you avoid them, focusing on someone, anyone else with crisp professionalism that hardly belies your fear. 

You’ve never been so angry in your life. Even if you have, you can’t remember it feeling this wretched.

+++

He sits beside you on the plane once you’re up in the air and leans forward with his elbows on his knees. The rest of the team sleeps scattered around the cabin, but you suspect that at least one of them is faking it, waiting for some kind of spectacle or spectacular blowup between the two of you. 

You haven’t spoken to Aaron since leaving the crime scene. You drove back to the precinct with Emily and Dave, staying close to JJ and Spencer while you packed your things. There’s a part of you that feels bad for creating what Strauss would call a “hostile work environment,” but the other part can’t bring itself to care. 

You can’t even begin to articulate the fear that coursed through you as you waited for him outside that house. You couldn’t begin to explain the extent of your fear, but after the stabbing and the removal of Haley and Jack from your lives, the prospect of losing him in the field was beyond unbearable. 

It’s frustrating to feel so comforted by his proximity while you’re still so angry with him. The familiarity of it all hardly blunts your anger. If anything, the relief at having him back at your side sharpens your anger into something that scares you. 

The impossibility of it is beyond measure. You’ve known for some time now, but this is the first you’re willing to admit it. 

I love him. 

Fuck.

You love him. You love his son. You love his wife. 

You love the weird look he gets on his face when he has to say “penetration” while he’s delivering a profile. You love the way he tries not to smile when Emily beats Spencer at chess. You love the way he twiddles with pens when he’s thinking or nervous or both. You love that each of his smiles feel like a gift just for you. 

There’s nothing you don’t love about him. 

Except, of course, the way he, with profound idiocy, endangered his life today for no particular reason in addition to his generally asshole-ish behavior. 

“I would say I’m sorry, but I’m sure you know that.” 

You do.

He waits on you, quiet and still. 

You take a deep breath, finally looking at him. “You scared the hell out of me.” 

He nods, his jaw flexing. 

“Don’t do it again.” 

He blinks once, slowly. You know he can’t promise that, but you appreciate his acknowledgment nevertheless. There’s quiet for a moment. 

“Aaron…” You look at him, nothing but concern in your tone. 

He shakes his head. “Don’t.”

“I was just going to say…” You swallow, trying to find better words but coming up short. “We’ll get him.”

+++

Derek’s voice echoes down to the bullpen as you finish up the last few pieces of your paperwork. “I will not stand by and watch this man kill himself.” 

Aaron’s door is closed as he works. You’re not sure if you’re thankful for that, or if you’d rather he hear it. You can’t really hear Dave - not that you’d want to, you’re almost as pissed at him as you are at Aaron - but it doesn’t matter. You know what he has to say. 

Derek’s voice drops lower than you can hear. Dave drops his head. 

Moments later, Derek flies back down the stairs, grabs his jacket, and takes his leave with a cursory goodbye thrown in your direction. Dave returns to his desk and Aaron’s door finally opens. 

You look up as his lights turn off, gathering your things at your desk. With a little sigh that looks a bit like defeat, he stops at your desk. The smugness doesn’t completely leave your tone. “Need a ride?”

Of course, he does. “Please.” 

You rise and walk to the elevators together. In the silence, you tell him, “I’m still really mad at you.” 

A sigh. “I know.” 

+++

You walk him upstairs and take care of the alarm while he removes his suit jacket and throws it over the couch. 

“Do you think Call’s gonna be okay?” You ask, still facing the alarm. 

“I don’t know.”

“He got his answers,” you note, turning to him. “He killed the man who haunted him.” 

His eyes are fixed on a spot on the carpet. “And what else is there?”

“Years of torture.” You both know you’re not talking about Call anymore, but it’s nice to pretend. It gives you the opportunity to say things you wouldn’t - shouldn’t - say to him. “Fear. Grief.”

“Think he’ll get over that?” 

“How could he?” A humorless smile pulls at one corner of your mouth. “But at least he doesn't feel like he’s alone.”

He finally meets your eyes. “He doesn’t have anyone.” I don’t have anyone, his brow says. 

“He has Tommy. He’s not alone.” 

You have me. You’re not alone. 

His brows pull low over his eyes, and you take another opportunity as it comes. “Do you want me to stay again tonight?”

“No, I’m alright.” He takes a little breath and you round the corner, pouring him a couple fingers of whiskey before making a slow, purposeful trek across the room. “Thank you,” he says, taking it. 

“Of course. Anytime.” Now, you both know you aren’t talking about the drink. 

Nevertheless, you pat your pockets for your keys, phone, and various federal paraphernalia, finding them all where they belong. “I should head out, then. Call if you need anything.” 

He nods, watching you with quiet eyes as you close and lock the door behind you. 

+++

tagging: @arganfics @quillvine @stxrryspencer @agenthotchner @hurricanejjareau @ughitsbaby @rousethemouse @criminalsmarts @shrimpyblog @genevievedarcygranger @ssaic-jareau @good-heavens-chris-evans @davidrossi-ismydad @angelsbabey @writefasttalkevenfaster @venusbarnes @hotchsflower @ogmilkis @marvels-agents100 @hotchslatte @risenfox @mrs-dr-reid @captain-christopher-pike @dwellingsofrosie @pan-pride-12 @sunshine-em @word-scribbless​ @jdougl-love​ @sageellsworth05​ @dreila03 @forgottenword @aaronhotchnerr @ssa-morgan @buckybau @sana-li @tegggeeee @abschaffer2 @ssacandice-ray @ellyhotchner @lotties-journey-abroad @mrs-joel-pimentel-23-25 @laneygthememequeen @violentvulgarvolatile  @mooneylupinblack @ssareidbby @violet-amxthyst @bwbatta @roses-and-grasses @lcvischmitt @capricorngf @missdowntonabbey @averyhotchner @mandylove1000 @cevanswhre @qvid-pro-qvo @jeor @spencers-hoodrat @infinity1321 @zizzlekwum @popped-weasels @evee87 @nuvoleincielo @this-broken-band-girl @reidtomestyles @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @winqhster @spencerelds @the-falling-in-the-danger @nattylite49 @crazyshannonigans