#part 1 was finished in november and i am working on part 2

[shamera]

Fandom: Mysterious Lotus Casebook Character/Pairing(s): pre-Fang Duobing/Li Lianhua, He Xiaofeng, He Xiaohui Rating: PG-13 Warning: blood, injuries, minor character death Summary:

Fifteen years ago, portals called 'gates' appeared all over the world leading to pocket dimensions people coined 'dungeons'. Ten years ago, two of the world's greatest Hunters disappeared after the collapse of a dungeon at the eastern sea. Three years ago, Fang Duobing Awakened as a Hunter, determined to follow in the footsteps of his idol. Today, a gate suddenly appeared within Tianji Hall, pulling its inhabitants into a dungeon.

[coridallasmultipass]

Halloween costume hint:

(The stitch marker and the word that describes this colour-pattern of yarn [or fabric] are 2 more hints.)

[rpgchoices]

The result of the DA romances survey (>2000 partecipants!) - Part 1

2273 people answered the survey, thank you so much! I truly did not expect such a big number and I am so humbled!

With all this data I wanted here to present the general results, and then work a bit more with correlations (ex. Zevran romancers... who did they prefer in next games?) in a part 2. So this part 1 will be a summary (with graphs) of the whole survey. The original survey was here on google form, I reopened it only to allow people to check how each question was written.

This first part is divided in:

General considerations on the sample size

General data

Dragon Age: origins (spoilers)

Dragon Age 2 (spoilers)

Dragon Age Inquisition (spoilers)

Dragon Age The Veilguard (no spoilers)

1. General considerations on the sample size

The survey was open from 16th November to 23rd November and 2273 people answered.

A consideration always must be done of the sample. In this case I wanted to underline that the places where I shared the survey and especially where it found track are well represented, while I definitely missed other portions of the fandom.

In general I shared the survey on tumblr (here), on twitter, on blue sky and on reddit. On twitter and blue sky I received a very small number of likes and retweet, while mainly the survey was shared on tumblr and it received comments here on reddit. Twitter, tumblr and bluesky are more correlated to a closer circle than places like reddit, so for completion sake: my rpgchoices tumblr is mainly about queer romances and videogames with queer content, my twitter is less DA-focused (actually only DA focused recently) and my bluesky is very very small.

Also keep in mind that people who have access to playing data will always have the correct data, because this sample size here reflects the online active fandom (mainly on reddit and tumblr) and not the general player base!

Another thing: I really regret not adding a question about age, gender and where you found the survey!

2. General data

The first question is, of course, which games did you play? People could choose multiple games at one:

I was quite surprised to see that Inquisition was the game most people played, but in general these was little difference between the three main games: DAI, DAO and DA2.

Veilguard (in violet) was divided between "Finished at least once" and "playing" and the sum of the two is 1998, which puts it just after Trespasser.

DAO DLCs are also the less played in general (with Darkspawn chronicles the least played), but with Awakening more played than DA2: Legacy and DA2: Mark of the Assassin.

Now, jumping into romances:

The majority of people seem to have a canon romance for each game (56%). 26% of people instead have different player characters for different romances (just like me!) while 15% of people mix it up!

Regarding the total characters that can be romanced in all the games (please ignore the colors, I messed the up... I am sorry):

For these graphs we can look right at the top and see that in both cases: Alistair is first. Alistair was the character that was romanced at least once and also multiple times the most. The order is the same for the first group of characters (in order): Alistair, Fenris, Zevran, Anders, Solas, Cullen, Dorian. The rest is relatively similar, with only some swaps.

For Veilguard (in violet) the numbers are smaller because the game is still new, so not many occasions to romance multiple characters. Lucanis in both cases was the most romanced in Veilguard and the one most romanced multiple times (126).

There was also another general question at the end, regarding other videogames with romances:

Congrats to the 5 people who played Hero-U rogue to redemption (it was adorable).

The question was framed with (for example) "Baldur's Gate games" so any game from 1 to 3. All these games have romances and are rpg, also if not all of them have queer romances.

Probably thanks to BG3 we have Baldur's Gate games in first place, with 1941 people (almost close to the full amount of the sample!) who played them, followed by the Mass Effect trilogy and Elder Scroll games.

If I can personally recommend games on the bottom half of the list: Pendula Swing (1920s urban fantasy, no combat, queer romances, female protagonist), Sorcery! (male or female protagonist, only 1 romance option who is a guy who tries to assassinate you, 4 games, text rpg, lots of choices, fantasy), Enderal (free pc mod for Skyrim with its own world, lore and story, one of the best game opening scenes ever if not the best, fully voiced, action rpg, queer romance, two tomance options) and Rogue Trader (isometric rpg in Warhammer universe, no knowlegde of the world or lore required, sci fi, turn based combat, multiple romances, queer romances, 1 d/s romance where you can choose to be dom or sub) are among my favorite games ever.

3. DRAGON AGE ORIGINS (spoilers from the game)

Alistair was the romance most favorited by people who answered the survey, with 38% of people choosing him, followed by Zevran (26%) and Morrigan (18%). A very small amount of people (3%) had no one as their favorite/canon romance.

Second fav romance was basically the same graph again!

Regarding the player character:

Female human Warden (Cousland) was the Warden that seems most played by the sample size, both for being considered the canon one (surpassing second place: female city elf, by almost double) and for being played at least once.

I also found it interesting that the order of female and male characters is the same. In general female Wardens are more popular (68%) but the order of popularity for origin being played at least once is still: human noble, city elf, dalish elf, elf mage, human mage, dwarf noble and dwarf commoner.

For what is considered canon, the order seems to change, with city elf male falling down the other elves, and human mage being even less popular.

There were also two questions about Morrigan and Alistair's destinies, but people let me know I missed some options, apologies! So take these with a grain of salt:

4. DRAGON AGE 2 (SPOILERS)

For favorite romance in DA2 we have Fenris taking even a bigger % of "fav romance" than Alistair in DAO (and keep in mind Alistair had less competitors!), followed by Anders (24%) and Isabela (15%).

Interesting for the second favorite romance it is the "No second favorite, only one favorite" that wins with 31%! This means that in DA2, a 31% of people just have a strong preference for one romance only.

Regarding the player character (Hawke):

(top graph) purple female Hawke seems to be the one that is preferred as canon Hawke, followed by purple male hawke. Red hawke (both genders) was the least chosen one.

(bottom graph) in general, Marian Hawke had a higher number of players (played at least once as) than Garrett Hawke, but the difference was not as big as we saw between female and male protagonists in DAO.

(pie graph) regarding the customization, the majority of people (51%) customized all of their Hawke, indipendently from gender and playthrough. A big number (33%) instead used the default Hawke, while others preferred a mix of the two (depending on gender or playthrough).

VARRIC!

39% of players would have romanced Varric in DA2 if he had been available! But interestingly this pie is divided in almost equal parts between yes, no and depending on how the romance actually was (which was the one I chose!).

5. DRAGON AGE INQUISITION

Solas was the most chosen romance (as favorite or canon) in DAI, with 25% of people choosing him. Dorian is second (18%) and Cullen third (15%). The no one (3%) is comparable to the same answer in the previous games.

Maybe unsurprisingly Sera was the least favorite romance among the companions (sigh... she is my canon one), with The Iron Bull also having very similar numbers to her (that surprised me, I admit it!). Josephine was the favorite female romance in DAI (11%).

As for DA2, when I asked about the second favorite romance there was a high number of "no second favorite" (19%), followed by Dorian, then Josephine. I think the fact that we do not have the same order as before (Solas, Dorian, Cullen) might mean that the Solas and Cullan romancer are very dedicated to their romance, especially Solas - who had only a 9% of people that chose him as a second favorite romance.

Regarding the Inquisitor:

Female elf (Lavellan) had an incredibly high number of people choosing her as their canon inquisitor, more than double second place (human female). The rest of the Inquisitors are not too different (a part from dwarves who again get the least amount).

For the question "which of these inquisitors did you play at least once" the order of the choices are pretty similar, with "female elf", "female human", "male elf" and "male human" (in this order) at the top.

Regarding the choice for Divine Victoria:

The majority (60%) chose Leliana as their Divine. In second place instead we had no canon Divine or a change based on playthrough. Vivienne (my Divine!!!) was the least chosen one (I am starting to feel some of my choices are very unpopular haha).

Now, for who did you leave in the fade:

It is pretty clear that (black and red graph, last on the right) Stroud was the easiest to leave in the fade.

(blue and red, first graph on the left) Hawke was also saved the most in games that had Loghain as the other option, with a similar percentage of people that chose to leave Loghain (82%) or Stroud (85%).

Surprisingly this flips (central graph, grey and red) when the choice was between Alistair and Hawke. Hawke in this case was the one left in the Fade, even if in less extreme % (67%), with Alistair being the one usually saved. Which checks out given Alistair was the most popular romance choice in DAO among the people who answered this survey.

6. DRAGON AGE VEILGUARD (NO SPOILERS)

And here the tentatively presented Veilguard results! I say tentatively because we are still very close to release, and a lot of people did not have the time to experience the full game or multiple romances.

In fact, only 11% of people completed multiple playthroughs. 46% completed the game at least once, while 31% are still playing it for the first time.

Regarding the player character, I only added questions regarding factions as they seem much more influential than elf/qunari/dwarf/human:

This was a multiple choice in case people tried different factions! Shadow Dragons, Mourn Watches and Grey Wardens have very similar numbers and are the top three. Surpringly, Veil Jumper was on the bottom (with Lord of Fortune being the least chosen).

Regarding the romances:

Before players started the game it seems like they had an idea among the characters who were romancable, with a lot of people being interested in the three male characters (Lucanis, Emmrich, Davrin) followed by Neve, Harding and Taash. Surprisingly, Bellara was even lower than "none/no spoilers".

In the first game, people followed more or less what they were interested in, with 28% of people going for the Lucanis romance, followed by Emmrich (19%) and then Davrin (16%). Following we have Neve, Harding and then Bellara, which this time surpassed Taash.

When we look at "who is your favorite romance" (graph on the left) we see that things changed based on expectation/who you tried to romance first.

Lucanis is not first anymore, but we actually have Emmrich (23%) as the favorite romance, followed by No one (19%) and only then Lucanis (15%). Davrin is in fourth place with 14%. The rest follows the same order as before, but all the female characters and the one non-binary characters are under "Multiple beloved equally" which is 9%.

Regarding the second favorite romance, maybe (because the game is so new) it is to be expected that the option that wins is "None/I only have one" with 36%, followed by Emmrich (16%) and then Davrin (13%). Interestingly, Lucanis fall to just a 7% under the "Multiple" (11%). I think (like we saw before for Solas and Cullen) it seems like the people who like Lucanis romance him and might not have a second favorite.

I hope you enjoyed this summary!! I cannot wait to make even more graphs and see what else is in this data!

[natsuyuki-w]

Not one of the boys

Twisted wonderland cast realizes that (Yuu) is a girl.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 Featuring: Grim - Trey - Adeuce - Tsunotaro, Cater and Riddle

Dumb human

- Hyiiii! It's really coming down! - Appeared the monster out of nowhere. - ARGH! Grim! - I jumped almost stumbling on the dusty sofa. - Gyahahahaha! You've got this stupid look on your face like... Whaaaaaa but you're a girl! - He panicked watching my shirt.

To dust the abandoned building, I had thrown off the ceremonial cape leaving me with a tight black shirt.. - Yes,... I identify as one at least. What about it? - His face gradually relaxed and he put a paw under his chin. - I dunno. I only saw boys, just thought you were one as well. - he shrugged. Thinking back to the faces I met in the mirror chamber, it could've been true. Tho there were many people, hooded furthermore, and there was no way of knowing if somebody was another gender instead.

- Yes I've decided.- piped the grey cat. - Nothing has changed, you're still a weak dumb human. -

- How many colorful titles am I going to get in the close future? -

Chestnuts

- Talking about husband material. - with the basket of chestnuts in hand, I gushed eying all the goodies in the kitchen prepared by the third year. Trey chuckled lightly - If you say so.- strangely enough, the comment hit differently from when his friends teased him about it.

Cater's words came to his mind: "Much like the new Pomefiore kid, (Yuu)Chan is a very cute boy."

- Lah - I clipped back Deuce's hair just like I did with mine. - Now we are ready! - and I struck a power pose. Trey looked at me for a good moment, mind wandering, cheeks reddening. His Heartslabyul companion was getting into his head.

---

With that tart involved, I knew it was going to end like this. - (Yuu)!!! Stop it. - slapped my hand Ace - I need them for the cake, do you want me to stay like this forever???- he pointed to the collar on his neck. - You are such a drama-king, there are probably 10 kilos of them. - I pouted - This is just the rightful prize for...Ouch! - he flicked my nose this time. Chestnuts were a weakness of mine and even tho it was a very boring and laborious task, Ace was considering switching and shelling them himself.

He snatched the one I just finished cleaning and dropped it in the pile - Junkie! - he threw a judging gaze. - Yes okay? I admit it. Hi, my name is (Yuu), I'm 18 years old, and it's since last November that I haven't tasted, this delicious fruit of the devil. - I chanted.

- Fruit of the devil? - asked Grim. - Yeah..., where I live, chestnuts have been said to be a gift from God to the people of the mountains, but that has been cursed by the devil, making them difficult to bring and eat.- - Ah-ha! - looked at me weirdly the cat.

- As I, mere mortal, can't look upon this gift... OUCH - a slap, this time on my nape. - Are you going to just punish me or do you intend to make yourself useful for YOUR apology cake? - I bit.

- Kids, calm down. - teased Trey posing his large hands on our heads - but (Yuu) has a point, Ace. - inquired. And scolded by the older student, the angry first year started working alongside me scrutinizing my every move.

---

After finishing the laborious job, I stood to go asking what we needed to do next, but before, I spun fast, aiming for my drug.

Unfortunately, Trey was quicker, and from behind me, he managed to grab the bowl and hold me back with his long arms. When his hand got hold of my waist, I felt him tense briefly, but he recomposed, looking down at me with his ears turning a tinge of red. - No more falling into temptation, okay (Yuu)? - he commented, lingered for just a moment, and then proceeded to give us instructions.

- What was that? - whispered Ace to me. - What? - I asked dumbfounded. - WHA??? You haven'...sigh...WHATever.- and he left

- What? -

---

- Do that thing you do, Trey-kun. - said Cater. The boy arrived just to snatch a couple of photos and enjoy our labor. -..., oh that! What are your favorite things to eat guys? - asked the other third-year. And after he listened and chanted "doodle suit", we all bitted into the slices again. Everyone was surprised and cheery about the unexpected flavor. My mind on the other hand went into a tantrum of emotions, and soon big juicy tears were streaming down my face.

- This is Trey-kun's unique magic. Don't you think it'd work super well on a date with a girl? - commented the boy winking and wrinkling the diamond seed on the cheek.

The rivers running from my eyes wouldn't stop. I quietly turned around hoping to cover it from the others, but Trey, who was right next to me, caught sight of my face - (Yuu)...what happened? Have I messed up yours? - he posed a comforting hand on my back. I shook my head and tried denying my poor state with sobs choking each word. -N-no no! I-*hick* it's perfect. A-and don't *sniff worry-y I'm just a baby. - I felt pathetic.

- You definitely are not doing well tho. - - I-it's just...I think I-I'm feeling homesick 'fro-om the taste. - I admitted in a murmur. Pushing me a little he looked where he could find some tissues, but after seeing that it wasn't getting better, he tried the bold move of hugging me.

Welcoming the comfort, I moved my arms from my face to the back of his shirt mumbling - I'm so sorry. - but too caught by my storm of emotions, I didn't realize the implications of my chest pressed against him.

His body went stiff like a wooden plank once again, but after a heavy gulp, he managed to relax. "Perhaps (Yuu) isn't a cute boy after all." He was going to take the information for himself.

Hook up???

- Excuse my intrusion. - said Deuce who came along to keep an eye on Ace. - Make yourself at home. - I smiled warmly. - the bathroom is here, I'll go up and take the mattress. Ace, do you want to sleep on the couch again? - - My back hurts just thinking about it. - he groaned.

- Let us give you a hand Prefect! - followed Deuce grabbing his companion by the wrist. - Hey, hey I'm coming... geez - he almost fell from the cramped stairs. - Hahaha, thank you. - I waved them up. - I'll seriously start to tie up this weekend. I'm sorry but for now, my guest room is the lounge. - and I invited them to my shared bedroom. - Don't worr...- the raven boy froze in place.

- What's up? - and I followed his eyes. - Ups... - my laundry was still folded on the sheets and, obviously, my bra was on top of the pile. - I can exp...- -I KNOW RIGHT? I never noticed until yesterday! - exclaimed Ace. - Gyahahaha, you should've seen him: "HOW DARE YOU LYING TO ME LIKE THAT, WOMAN?". So lame. - Grim cackled nudging the boy's leg, but no reactions came out of him.

- ACE, GRIM DAMN IT! I was ready with a bunch of excuses! - - Oh yeah, like? - they asked incredulously. - This Gremlin pranked me? I snatched a hook-up? I like wearing women's clothes or I'm a Drag queen?...-

- THOSE EXCUSES ARE EVEN MORE EMBARRASSING THAN THE TRUTH! - Screamed back at me the ginger. I glared very disappointed but before I could insult his bigotry he inquired - And a hookup? How in hell would you find a girl to hook up with? - - Mhpf... - I pouted offended - I AM a pretty boy! Cater's words. I could find a girl easily if only I would.-

- (Yuu)...- Finally Deuce snapped out of his daze and spoke with a quiet voice. - ...you are a girl... - and a little hurt asked - Why didn't you tell us? - I had the impression this was starting to become a talk of routine. - Crowley asked me to keep it a secret, but honestly...Well, is not like I needed to tell anything. Do you present yourself as "Deuce, a man, nice to meet you." - I acted - Till the headmaster warned me I don't recall occasions where my gender got questioned...other than Grim on the first day here. -

He was trying to Think how to take the situation, and that operation was successful just as mixing water with oil. - Look - I posed a hand on his shoulder before his brain started fuming - I wanna be friends with you all, it's not like I act any different either way, it's always me. Just covering more than I would usually. I mean, if it's awkward for you guys, I would be very sad, but I'll...accept it and I'll take my distan...- And he exchanged with a stern hold of my shoulder. - No! You're right! I wanna still be friends with you. And don't worry - he puffed his chest holding his fist on it - I'll be sure your secret will not be spilled further! -

- Awww thank you Deuce, you're such a sweetheart.-  - Mmmm... - he nodded but quickly turned to face the other way - SORRY...can't help it,.... that name hits differently now. - his face was red as a tomato.

---

They sat on their mattress while I was on the couch with Grim lying in my lap. - So in order, Grim was the first one, then the headmaster...when? - - After I gave him the crystal of the Dwarf's mine. - and I mimicked dramatically - One moment he was: "I'll grant you the honor of attending our majestic academy. Go and make me proud son." then he saw and he was: "WHAT'S A CHICK DOING IN MY OFFICE?". - The events may be inaccurate...- muttered the gray cat and I shushed him.

- How many others know? - asked Deuce. - You two,... I think?- - I bet, Trey-senpai. - inquired Ace. - Why? - - He was SO all over you. - he smirked. - All over...didn't notice. - delicious chestnuts were the only thing I could recall - And how do you know he doesn't like boys? - - Yeah exactly - supported me Deuce. - Cater said something about his unique magic being great with the girls so I am assuming.- shrugged the ginger. - He has a point! - quickly changed sides his companion.

Intruders

Me and Grim prepared ourselves for another day of investigations into the mysterious incidents. On the path to the school, I sum up my late-night talking with the mysterious stranger.

-...and I saw those green sparks and this big shadow out of the widow. So I opened it and there was this Huge stunning boy with dark horns on his head. So I was like: " Intruder!" and he was like: "A child of man? Though, aren't you the intruder little lady? " - I imitated his tone - Obviously, I was wearing the crop top and not one of the XXL shirts - and Grim cackled.

- So I went out, 'cause I didn't want to wake you and I told him the all I'm here cause blah blah, don't tell anybody etcetera. So I asked him why he strolled around our dorm? And he said he was there cause he likes exploring ruins, and now we ruined his ruin, cause the abandoned building is no longer abandoned.-

- Rude! - - A little...- - So who was he?- - Wait I'm getting there! - We stopped waiting for our favorite duo. - I asked him and he was all weird about it. At first, astonished, and then he laughed and said " I'd rather you remain unaware". - - Suspicious! - whispered Grim. - "It's for your own benefit. Instead, I will permit you to call me by the name of your choosing." - and I got closer to the cat to add drama -" Although you may one day regret it..."-

We looked at each other and grinned mischievously. - Oooh, oooh let me pick it! - exclaimed Grim - Howsabaout...Tsunotaro! - I couldn't help but giggle. - I was thinking "Hornton", but yours works well. Can't wait to see his face when I tell him.-

He then pondered - If Tsunotaro's a student here who knows when we might run into him? If we do, introduce me! I've never seen a human with horns before.- - G'morning, Prefect. - jumped Cater from behind us and threw an arm around my shoulders.

- Cater don't be so touchy - frowned slightly Riddle, and the older student complied disappointed. - But (Yuu)Chan is soft, I like giving hugs to my kohai.- I chuckled embarrassed - Good morning to you Cater, and hello Riddle. How is Trey doing? - - Better, he's slowly but surely recovering thanks to Crewel's potions and nurses' caring. - responded the redhead.

He then looked intensely - Mmh your tie is a little off from the assault. - frowned Riddle - Following the rules starts with your attire. Or else your residents will never listen to you...Although, I guess it's not as bad for you being the only one. - inquired the head of Heartslabyul.

I looked down and out of the corner of my eye, I could see the third year smirking. Before I knew it Riddle had his hands on my clothes, the back of his hand brushing on my chest. I stood still, too stunned to make a move. "Wow (Yuu) is very broad." thought the short boy. - Riddle-San... You are unfair, first telling me not to be touchy with her, and now look at you. -

It took some time for the both of us to register his phrase and still holding onto my tie he twisted his head and stuttered - W-what have you just said? - - *damn it... Ha-ha. Why? Did he say something weird? - I tried to play dumb hoping Cater would doubt his words. Unfortunately, my body was not as much of a good actor, and the boy's green eyes immediately spotted my shade of red. - I said: it's unfair you can be touchy with Her. -

The dorm leader looked back at me and a million thoughts passed through his big eyes, realizing everything at once. Quickly became red from head to toe, then threw himself back in a mess of sorries - I didn't know! Since when?... -

Incredulous, Grim asked - HOW DID YOU KNOW S...*MPHF - I quickly covered his mouth to avoid the entirety of the front yard eavesdropping. - Trey-kun told me! - winked Cater. - And since when Trey knya about it???- exclaimed again the cat. - Since the Mont Blanc tart! He was all over you so I asked and he confessed his suspicions. -

- Ace said the same thing... Dang, I'm in debt with that dummy...- I mumbled recalling his bet. - Was I the only one ignoring this fundamental fact??? - snapped Riddle still full red. - I don't know,...(Yuu)? - the third year quickly threw the fireball at me. - Well, there is Grim, the headmaster, who by the way, was the one saying it would've been troublesome letting this information known. - I explained - Then Ace discovered, Deuce, Trey as it seems, and Cater too, Tsunotaro, and now you! - I listed. - I think...- - Tsuno-Who? - asked the two members of Heartslabyul. - Ah, a new encounter I made yesterday. -

- So you're telling me, someone, you just met, knew it before me???- and the tinge of red on the king of hearts, changed from fluster to anger.

Till reading the manga I thought Cater's name was "Carter" instead.

Not just because it sounded better in my head, but because "Carte" in Italian means "Cards".

[alexalexinii]

A YEAR OF (CARRY ON) ART

Thank you for ALL THE TAGS omg Im overwhelmed ahaha. (@noblecorgi @artsyunderstudy @ileadacharmedlife @nausikaaa @rimeswithpurple

@confused-bi-queer @monbons @emeryhall @run-for-chamo-miles)

I did so much art this year, a few of them being Carry On inspired, because how could I not. Didnt do as much art as I thought but here is my roundup for 2024!!

January

Penny's Birthday Art

February

Year of the Dragon Art

Baz's Birthday Art

Carry On Valentine Exchange for @thewholelemon

EGF Art - Splendid Morons by @noblecorgi

EGF Art - Direct Engagement of Restriction by @facewithoutheart

March

I didnt really do anything cause uni just started :,(

April

Snowbaz Wedding Snippet

Snowbaz in a Flower Field

May

I was mostly trying to get uni work and convention artwork done this month! cause I had a pretty big con at the start of June!

June

Simon's Birthday Art

Gay Plots (aka using memes to make me sane during uni part 1)

July

The Way We Are by @roomwithanopenfire

WS in a nutshell (aka using memes to make me sane during uni part 2)

August

Carry On Art Remix (aka using memes to make me sane during uni part 3)

September

Uni strickes once again, I needed to focus. Also did art that I cant show yet teehee.

October

The Chosen One

November

Carry On Through the Ages (I love drawing Simon angry, its fun)

December

Mage Commission done for @mooncello and @drowninginships as a gift for @valeffelees !!

Secret Snowfake Exchange for @onepintobean

Here's also a general wrap-up for all my art

I'll also copy and paste what I wrote on my instagram real quick:

"THATS A WRAP ON 2024!! This year has been…. a lot. From finishing honours to being hospitalised, I’ve had a lot of challenges this year but it proved to me that I am able to get over anything I set my mind to!.... ...The Simon Snow fandom has been incredible again this year and one of the best fandoms I’ve been a part of! So much support and love and so many collaborations with writers. I’ve been very happy to have been part of them... ...Besides the stress and pain I’ve gone through this year, it has been a good one overall. Thank you all! See you in 2025!!"

And Tags!!!

@aristocratic-otter @best--dress @bookish-bogwitch

@cutestkilla @ebbpettier @facewithoutheart @fatalfangirl

@hushed-chorus @iamamythologicalcreature @imagineacoolusername

@katatsumuli @leithillustration @letraspal @martsonmars @mooncello

@nightimedreamersworld @orange-peony @palimpsessed

@raenestee @roomwithanopenfire @scribble-tier @youarenevertooold

 @shrekgogurt @theimpossibledemon @thewholelemon @valeffelees @wellbelesbian

[hotwaterandmilk]

A couple of things I received in the mail this week.

Wada Shinji Artworks

Released in 2022 this book, which commemorates 10 years since Wada's death, covers an extensive assortment of artwork from the artist's catalogue including finished colour pieces, manuscripts and comments.

Truly if you're a fan of Wada this book is for you, it is very comprehensive; offering insight into his processes as well as exquisite finished artwork. It does something I'm normally not a fan of in art books, which is spread artwork across pages and combine several illustrations to a page in some places.

However, this book feels like a journey through Wada's career (grouped together by thematic elements like historical titles or suspense titles) and each page is composed in a particular way as part of telling this story so I actually don't mind it all that much. No, not the best for scanning but I don't think a book like this should be about scanning - it's about walking down Wada's path and rediscovering (or igniting) a sense of respect and affection for his works. In that sense, I really do think this book is successful.

I'm old but not old enough to have grown up reading Wada's stories (I was only introduced as a teenager with Sukeban Deka, which immediately captured me because it combined detective themes with action) so I can't speak as an authority on his works or career. But I believe most fans of manga will take something away from a detailed retrospective like this and as such, I highly recommend it.

Lab-Garnier's Magical Emi doujinshi

The latest in Asamiya Kia's long line of full-colour heroine doujinshi volumes which can veer between featuring cute, harmless pics, cheesecake shots and some more softcore illustrations (such as the one he did for Saimebi's Lebia). I had hoped this one would just be on the cute side of things given that Mai from Magical Emi is IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL however, this was not to be.

While there are a couple of fairly harmless shots of Mai, which I've included here, there is also a double-page panty shot spread and a bath illustration of her naked. 🤢🤢🤢 I had thought Yui from Corrector Yui eating ice cream in her book was bad enough, but this is on another level of NOPE. I'm posting this to save others from making the same mistake I did. This isn’t cute, it is gross ass shit.

Ranma 1/2 Ciao Magazine stickers

Ciao magazine shares a lot of shounen collab content, particularly Meitantei Conan, but in the November issue they actually included some Ranma content (timed obviously with the new anime series’ release).

While I’m not a big Takahashi-head, I had to get the magazine issue specifically for these stickers because I fell in love with the designs. Truly, an insert sticker sheet did NOT have to go this hard. If nobody else has scanned them I’m happy to do so, but Ranma has a lot of dedicated fans so it may not be necessary. I am happy I got these for myself though, very cute little insert that highlights Takahashi’s iconic artwork in a way that will appeal to young girls.

[mcytblrescape]

Welcome to the Escape Room!

Hello, and welcome to the MCYTblr Escape Room Event, run by @edgarallanpoestan and @patorucho! This is an event where you follow clues and fulfill prompts with a team, in order to escape and complete the challenge.

Interested? Our current stage of running/creation is below, as well as more information about the event itself!

Discord

AO3 Collection

Our current stage of running/creation: Team assignments!

Our next stage of running/creation: Room One opens!

Schedule

-> Signups: October 19, 2024 12:00 am CST - November 30, 2024 11:59 pm CST

-> Team Assignments: By December 14, 2024

-> First Room Opens: January 5, 2025 12:00 am CST

-> Event Ends: March 15, 2025 11:59 pm CST

(Below is a rough breakdown of rooms; NOT necessary to stick to this schedule. Each new room opens once you complete the previous room, the only strict deadlines are those above)

-> Room One: January 5, 2025 12:00 am CST - January 18, 2025 11:59 pm CST

-> Room Two: January 19, 2025 12:00 am CST - February 1, 2025 11:59 pm CST

-> Room Three: February 2, 2025 12:00 am CST - February 15, 2025 11:59 pm CST

-> Room Four: February 16, 2025 12:00 am CST - March 1, 2025 11:59 pm CST

-> Room Five: March 2, 2025 12:00 am CST - March 15, 2025 11:59 pm CST

Rules

-> As per Tumblr and Discord Terms of Service, all participants must be 13 or older at the time of sign-ups, no exceptions

-> You must join our Discord. If that is an issue, contact a mod, and we will try to figure out a workaround, but you must be present in the server in some way

-> Show all other participants respect and consideration. You will be on different teams, but you are not against each other. Help out your fellow escapees, and be kind to everyone!

-> Work with your teammates, make sure to contribute! We understand if something comes up, real life should always be your first priority. When possible, please at least give a heads-up to your team

-> Absolutely no AI generated content

FAQ

What is the Escape Room Event? How does it work?

-> All teams are given a clue to start out. These clues will lead the team to a prompt. If you get stuck don't worry! Teams will be allowed to vote on hints. There are 5 rooms to solve, and for each room "escaped", your team is given the aforementioned prompt to create for. These can be created a few different ways: every person in the team takes a prompt to fulfill (or, each person creates one or two full pieces, depending on team size, throughout the course of the event); all team members work together to fulfill every prompt (or, each person contributes to each prompt! A webweave made with multiple people looking for content, while others are writing drabbles or doodling something to include, multiple artists working on the same art piece, one fic broken up into multiple parts for each writer, the ideas are endless); or any other combination your team would like to try, as long as everyone is participating! There is no penalty to not finishing all the rooms, this is all for fun!

How do I participate?

-> Fill out our sign-up form, and join our Discord, which is linked above the cut! This is where we will be sending most of our announcements and information, so this is required to participate. You are free to join using a throwaway or sock account, and you do not need to talk -- this is for ease of access on our end, especially if we need to reach out to anyone for any reason.

How do I join a team?

-> Teams will be randomly selected! If there is anyone you specifically do not want to be teamed with, please let a mod know privately

Is AO3 posting required?

-> You are not required to post onto AO3, but we will have a collection available for anyone who would like to!

[gunsandspaceships]

MCU Timeline: Iron Man 2. Part 2

Part 1

2010

May 11, night - Stark Expo opening. Blood toxicity - 19%.

May 12, 9:00 am - 3:30 pm - Tony at the Senate Armed Services Committee hearings.

May 13, evening:

Tony is back home and has a video conference in 4 hours. Blood toxicity - 24%. 362 days of Expo left.

Tony (unofficially for now) appoints Pepper as CEO of SI.

May 14 - Tony officially transfers the management of the company to Pepper.

Note: confirmation of 2010 from S.H.I.E.L.D. dossier. The Avengers (deleted scene).

Between May 14 and May 23 - Tony hires Natasha as his new PA.

May 23 - Tony in Monaco. Vanko attacks him on the race track. Blood toxicity - 53%.

BAMF achievement: are you talking about Afghanistan, Tony?

May 24, 7:32 am PT - Tony and Pepper are on the Stark Jet flying home from Monaco. Three hours into the flight, Stern is interviewed by MSNBC.

May 25:

Hammer arranges Vanko's escape and brings him to his place. Ivan begins work on drones, his reactor 2.0 and a suit.

Night - Tony searches for information about Vanko after he was declared dead.

Another f*ck up in dates - the screens say 05.06.10. For that to be true, we'd have to move Tony's birthday and change the Expo countdown.

May 29 (Saturday):

Tony's birthday. Blood toxicity - 89%.

10 pm - party.

Rhodey steals Mark II and fights Tony, then flies away.

May 30:

Morning - after ~10 hours of doing something somewhere Rhodes finally brings Mark II to Edwards Air Force Base.

Tony eats donuts in a donut. Fury and Natasha give him a pep talk and lithium dioxide.

Hammer brings Ivan not his bird and notices that he makes drones, not suits.

USAF calls in Hammer to outfit stolen Mark II with his weapons.

Afternoon - Fury tells Tony that Howard was the founder of S.H.I.E.L.D. and gives him a chest of Howard's things.

Evening - Hammer gets his hands on Mark II and turns it into "War Machine".

Tony looks through his father's notes and receives his message recorded in 1973.

May 31:

Morning - Tony goes to apologize to Pepper and finds the "Key to the Future".

Afternoon - Tony (re)discovers a new element and orders components for a particle accelerator. Meanwhile, he drills more holes into his house, eventually turning it into a piece of Swiss cheese.

June 1:

343 days of Stark Expo left.

Morning - Tony builds his particle accelerator. Coulson is reassigned to New Mexico.

Note: As we've established in Thor's timeline, its events take place in November 2011. Not May/June 2010. I could do some logical gymnastics and stretch it to 2010 (which would already create a mess), but there's no way it could be in May/June.

Afternoon - Tony finishes the particle accelerator and synthesizes the new element at home.

Note: mention of 2010 again.

Evening - Vanko finishes his suit and the drones.

6:20 pm - Vanko calls Tony. Tony heads to New York in the new Mark VI.

40 minutes is most probably an exaggeration, since it is unlikely that Tony could get from Malibu to Flushing in less than 40 minutes. In any case, Tony didn't have time for anything else, especially considering that he needed time to assemble his new suit.

7-9 pm - Hammer and Vanko at the Stark Expo. Tony and Rhodey fight Vanko and defeat him. He blows himself and the Expo up. Tony saves Pepper and 8-year-old Peter Parker. Pepperony's first kiss.

Considering that other things tell us it's been 19 days since Pepper became CEO, Tony's "a week" line is an exaggeration. And Pepper plays along, just like she did with 12% in The Avengers.

I could write a whole post about why it could not be just a week (from Expo opening to the fight) as it's stated in other timelines, but I'll just give you one question to think about: how many days Ivan would need to build all those drones, a new reactor and a suit? Probably not 2.

A week later - Fury gives Tony Natasha's assessment of him and offers him a position as a consultant at S.H.I.E.L.D. Tony accepts.

Mid June - Senator Stern awards Tony and Rhodey with medals.

The Consultant

Second half of 2010:

The World Security Counsel still supports the Avengers Initiative at this point. But they want The Abomination on the team. Coulson and Sitwell send Tony to sabotage the transfer between General Ross and S.H.I.E.L.D. He succeeds, and Blonsky remains in prison.

After that, the WSC loses interest in the Avengers Initiative.

Thor (2011) Timeline

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) Timeline

The Avengers (2012) Timeline

[spicerackofblorbos]

i'm GOD AWFUL at answering my asks unless they're requests, I'm sorry a;sldkfjas;df but to everyone who has sent me hearts, good vibes, and sunflowers, I appreciate and love you all so much!! <3 i'm finally getting around to this one!

i've been ordered by kat to do 5 more so here's my top 10 favorite fics I've written!! These are ALL x reader!

1. Amethyst | Leon Kennedy 2. Unspoken Words | Levi Ackerman - Chapter One: November 3. Sunrise | Levi Ackerman 4. Home | Leon Kennedy 5. For You, I Would | Armin Arlert 6. Can I Go Where You Go? | Levi Ackerman 7. Are You There? | Levi Ackerman 8. Chasing Waterfalls | Toge Inumaki 9. You'll Be Okay | Levi Ackerman 10. What's Mine, Is Yours | Erwin Smith

And here's my answer to tay's ask about my fics!

❥ fic I loved writing the most

this will always be dependent on when you ask me, because right now it will have to be Amethyst. If y'all haven't noticed, my newest love is Leon Kennedy, and writing for him is so much easier than writing for Levi and I think it's because I understand Leon's personality more. He's just so fun to riff off of. Not that Levi wasn't!! He was just harder to put down for me, I guess. ANWAYS. I loved writing for Leon and I'm working on a part two!!

❥ fic others loved that I didn't care for

okay so this might come as a surprise because it's my ultimate comfort fic, but it would have to be Sunrise. tbh, I don't know what loved the most means here but I'll equate it to notes. Sunrise is precious to me because it holds so many of my favorite things. BUT I really feel like I could have done so much better. The plot is there, the scenario and surroundings are perfect. but the WRITING?? I could have done better. don't get me wrong though, I still love it and I am very happy so many people liked it!!

❥ fic I had fun writing

definitely my For You, I Would fic. I don't have very many Armin fics but I enjoyed writing for him a lot because he's just such a shy little bean and so full of wonder and love. I could really see myself wanting to take him out on a date. This was also a request for my friend Tay and it was fun catering her interests within the story and how it works well with Armin!!

❥ fic I'm most proud of

for sure it would have to be Unspoken Words. I'm proud because it was the first time I've written something for myself in a long time. I didn't think I would care as much about fanfic until I fell in love with AoT, now look at me LMAO. UW helped me become a better writer as well as be more confident in areas I thought I lacked. I quite literally used it as a way to be better, and I'll always be proud of it. My first ever full and finished fic, I'll never forget it <3

❥ fic I wish got more recognition

probably Can I Go Where You Go? mainly because I really liked writing the semi plot twist at the end. like if you were caught up with season 4 of AoT, you would know what I was alluding to and it's like a kick in the gut LMAO. but also I thought I did pretty well with the descriptors, not to brag ofc. :3

❥ my happiest/saddest/most comedic fic

I SPENT 30 MINUTES LOOKING FOR THIS. but the saddest will have to be this short drabble about Levi losing you in an expedition and him coming to your old room, reminiscing. I don't know what brought it on but I was like, huh. let's just be SAD.

if you're interested, my fic masterlist can be found here!

finally, thank you so much for the asks @kingkonoha, @youre-ackermine, and @humanitys-strongest-bamf!! I love y'all a lot <3

[1d1195]

Screens II

Read the first part here: Screens

Another thank you to my 🪁-anon. Without you and your kind request, this story would not exist. I hope you enjoy this part as much as possible. Thank you to the following anon's for their support, I don't have names or emoji's for you but here are the kind messages I've received patiently waiting for a part 2: one and only Screens fan, #1 Screens fan, and this one that sobbed while trying to finish reading it. I did not mean to exclude anyone, I typed Screens into my blog's search bar to gather this information.

Finally, this anon provided a good chunk of the inspiration.

I hope you all enjoy it. I wrote it in a sense in a series of flashbacks and you will see this ◊ to indicate the difference in flashback scenes vs. my standard * to indicate a bit of time has passed.

"Okay on with it, lady. You talk to much." --Everyone reading this (probably).

Harry wasn’t so distracted by how pretty she looked with hair and paint falling across her pretty skin and over her beautiful face that he missed her saying the word ‘if.’ A hopeful sign that she believed in a miracle even if she was too scared to say so herself on any given day. Part of him also noted and hated the idea of her finding an apartment without him; even after a mere nine months of being in absolute love with her. He wished he had asked her to move in right then.

December | Holiday Break | 8:30 AM

Harry was extremely mindful of announcing his presence around her because he hated how jumpy she got when anyone else spooked her because she didn’t always see them coming around the corner or something. He especially did so in the quiet of the morning or the stillness of the evening. “Angel?” He called into his apartment. It was chilly on their first day of holiday break from work. Harry wanted her to stay the whole week with him. She couldn’t deny she didn’t want the same thing. He ventured into the winter air and returned with hot coffee, foam on top just as she liked.

They’d been together, officially, for a little over a year. But having known her a bit for the better part of a decade, it was easier than he ever thought to be in a relationship with her and he wished that he had thought of it long before last November. “Mm,” she hummed barely loud enough for him to hear as he approached his bedroom. “M’sleeping,” she mumbled against the pillow as he made his way across the room.

He chuckled quietly and set the coffees on his nightstand before slipping back under the covers with her. She rolled herself on top of him, legs on either side of his hips and her face pressed against the front of his shoulder. She was scrunched against him like a little ball. “Don’t move.”

He wouldn’t have if someone tried to force him to move. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the side of her head. “Coffee’ll get cold,” he mumbled, rubbing his fingers against the back of her head. She sighed but said nothing. “C’mon, kitten. Y’told me t’not let y’sleep late,” he cooed and kissed her again.

“I lied,” she murmured. He chuckled. “M’too heavy, that’s it, isn’t it? Want me off you?” He rolled his eyes and squeezed her tight against him.

“No, y’silly thing.” She lifted her head up and hovered above him for a moment. She didn’t speak but she lightly drew her finger over his features. He watched as her eyes squinted, sliding over the trail of her finger in silence. She did this at least once a week. Usually when they saw one another on the weekends because they had more time than their Thursday night ritual. “What are y’doing?” He asked her.

Her cheeks reddened and she shook her head. She didn’t say and Harry let it drop. He always let it drop when he asked. Part of him thought nothing of it, surely it was for a portrait—a painting or a drawing she was working on. She had seen her do it with a rose, tracing the thorns carefully; or the arm of a park bench, admiring how it looked in the afternoon light.

Nonetheless, he enjoyed the way her fingers felt on his skin. It was one of the many things she taught him: using his sense of touch so much more.

Carefully he tightened his grip on her as he rolled the pair of them onto their sides to face one another. He brought his hand to her face and gently brushed his thumb across her lips and then traced his finger over her brow line, over the bridge of her nose, before settling his hand firmly against her cheek. “When’s your appointment?” He asked.

She sighed and shook her head. “Noon,” she mumbled. He gave her body a gentle squeeze as he held her.

“It’ll be alright, kitten.”

“I can’t teach if I can’t see,” she reminded him. “I’m sitting right in front of you, and I can hardly see you,” she whispered quietly.

He frowned and reached behind her for her glasses on the other little table beside his bed. He slid them into place, mindful to not catch her ear or pull too hard against her hair. He smiled at her. It made her stomach flip because Harry was by far the most beautiful person she had ever met. “I love your glasses,” he whispered. She rolled her eyes and shook her head.

“I look like a librarian.”

“The sexiest librarian ’ve ever laid eyes on,” he promised and ignored her snort. “Not only do they help y’see, but they help me see. S’like they magnify your eyes. Swear I can see everything you’re hiding in that beautiful brain of yours,” he murmured and pressed a kiss to her forehead, right between the rim of the glasses hovering over her eyes.

“They look like coke bottles.”

He shook his head. “I think you’re gorgeous,” he promised and pulled them down slightly and pressed a kiss to each of her eyelids. Silently he hoped and prayed to whatever god was out there that her appointment would give her good news and make the ache in her mind and heart lessen just a bit. He didn’t care if she needed glasses by any means or if her eyesight got worse. None of that mattered to him at all. He just wanted her to be a little happier than she was before.

*

Over the past year, he had seen so many stages of her grief. He saw the anger she felt when she missed a step and dropped her food outside the restaurant causing a mess all over her shoes and the entry way. It made her eyes water as she asked the hostess if she could have some towels to clean it up so no one would slip on their way out. Harry helped her clean it up and even placed the quickest to go order ever made so she could have extra for lunch the following day and promised her it was no big deal that she spilled.

 He watched her sadness as she couldn’t see things in plain sight—like the ever-hiding remote always evading her vision. Or when she accidentally put cinnamon in her pasta dish because she swore it was paprika.

The pain that puckered her eyebrows together all because her glasses and the screens at work bothered her so much.

Harry begged her so plainly to ask him for help. He had the phone pressed to his ear as he laid his head back against the sofa. Her voice made his stomach knot in the best way—she made him weak in the knees and the only thing he regretted about dating her was not doing it sooner. “I’ll bother you,” she whispered into the phone.

“Kitten, of course not.”

“If you’re hanging out with friends, and you need to come get me because it’s raining at night...and I can’t drive myself home?”

“Then I’ll say, ‘sorry lads, m’princess needs me.’ If they have a problem with that, s’on them,” he said simply with a shrug.

She released a quiet giggle despite how much she didn’t want to. “You’re much nicer to me than anyone I’ve ever known.”

◊

But she wasn’t always so down about it. Sometimes she had a really good sense of humor about it. Harry didn’t love it all that much though. It hurt him to hear her joke about something he knew in his heart hurt her quite a bit. But he was glad she could be in good spirits about it.

“Listen,” she said almost a month after their first kiss. “You’d be surprised how often someone says, ‘what are you blind?’ You’re just going to have to roll with it. It’s okay. I’ve heard it a lot and I say it to myself sometimes. I’ve been working on new comebacks but so far ‘legally, no; spiritually yes,’ is my favorite.”

Harry felt a wave of awkwardness wash over him, but she just continued to smile this gorgeous, bright smile that he had no choice but to let her make her joke.

And if he did say ‘What are you, blind?’ a few days later, well... at least she had warned him.

◊

Harry read to her sometimes. It made her feel like a little kid, but he didn’t dwell on it. He acted as if it was completely normal for a boyfriend to read out loud like a kindergarten teacher to his girlfriend. She snuggled up to him in his lap and glanced at the pages every so often as he held the book in front of them. She had to be careful though because Harry’s voice was so soothing and even though she loved to hear him talk, there had been many chapters she missed because he accidentally put her to sleep with his melodic voice.

◊

Sleeping together in the quiet parts of the night were some of his favorite times. Whether something more intimate happened between them or not. Night was when he felt most attuned to her. Harry couldn’t see any more than she could. Touching her, feeling the goosebumps he left in the wake of his fingertips against her skin made him much more aware of how touch could bring him to his knees for her. He also paid close attention to her near silent, soft whines of pleasure or how her laugh seemed so much brighter in the dark.

But listening to her speak at night might have been one of his most favorite things. “Why did y’leave me after that party?” He whispered. It bothered him a bit when they first started dating.

Her face was pressed to his chest, her finger moving over his face as it always did, this time focusing on the shape of his jaw, outlining the scruffy remnants of hair growth since he last shaved. “Why would you want to be with the near-blind girl?” She shrugged.

It took him no time at all to answer. “Cause she’s perfect.” She smiled and pressed a kiss almost touching the cross necklace that dangled between the sparrows on his chest.

She never asked him again if it mattered to him if she’d go totally blind. Not since she asked after their first kiss last November. He said it all right then at that moment. She believed him so easily because no, she hadn’t ever thought about it. There wasn’t a time when she thought that maybe she wouldn’t go blind. So, for Harry to believe it was possible was more than enough.

◊

Harry worried about her a lot more than most people did a lot of the time. More than her family who were so used to her poor sight it didn’t even phase them when she handed them the wrong cups or passed along the wrong items because they weren’t clear enough about where they were. More than strangers who would roll their eyes at her when she bumped into them on public transport.

But mostly herself because while she had been living with bad eyes for so long, it took Harry some getting used to the ins and outs of the harder things she had to do. One day they painted two canvases together, spinning them back and forth between them for five minutes creating fun little landscapes that didn’t make any sense. “Would y’ever want a seeing eye dog?” He asked. Harry was a terrible painter, but he’d do anything to spend time with her doing her favorite things. “Bet we could get you a really cute pup,” he smiled.

She smirked so cutely, and she wiped her hand across her forehead to get a piece of hair out of her eyes. In doing so, she painted a stripe of pink paint across her forehead, making his heart feel so jumpy with love for her. “Maybe if I went totally blind,” she shrugged. “Would need to find an apartment that allows a cute dog too,” she reminded him. As if a seeing-eye dog wasn’t an exception to most places.

Harry wasn’t so distracted by how pretty she looked with hair and paint falling across her pretty skin and over her beautiful face that he missed her saying the word ‘if.’ A hopeful sign that she believed in a miracle even if she was too scared to say so herself on any given day. Part of him also noted and hated the idea of her finding an apartment without him; even after a mere nine months of being in absolute love with her. He wished he had asked her to move in right then.

◊

Loving one another didn’t come without some hardships either.

Once more she found herself bumping into someone. Harry had gone ahead to the car to get to her door and naturally the moment he left her side she was nearly falling flat on her bum. However, the person bumping into her was quick, caught her around the waist before she hit the ground. “Oh, easy love. You alright?”

“I’m so sorry,” she said quickly.

“Hardly your fault, love. Don’t be sorry,” he smirked. “S’easy to fall for me,” he winked at her.

She gaped in surprise. Harry wasn’t surprised in the slightest because she was by far the most adorable person on the planet let alone that street. “Excuse me,” Harry said flatly. Harry eyed the arm around her waist that didn’t belong to her or himself, and the man turned his attention to Harry.

“Oh, of course you’re taken...Someone as beautiful as you would have to be,” he released his grip from her. “Sorry, mate,” he said to Harry and then winked at the beautiful girl.

Harry grabbed her hand and marched quickly toward his car without so much as another glance in his direction. “Harry,” she whined as he tugged her. He wasn’t rough, exactly. She didn’t think it was possible for him to be rough with her even when he was grumpy. Her mind flashed to that very first day when he looked at her with so much annoyance for getting food all over his clothes and then separating him from his friends.

Harry often got so protective of her that it came across as overbearing and every so often, he couldn’t help but feel jealous when someone else helped her. She had done so much on her own for so long the idea that she didn’t need him or worse, needed someone else made him so utterly sad that he had a hard time expressing how upset it made him. “M’sorry,” he whispered.

“Sorry? Why?”

“Jus’...I get so sad when other people help you,” he frowned. She turned toward him in her seat. “Not because I don’t want them t’help you. But because...I jus’ like helping you. Makes me think y’don’t really need me,” he mumbled. “I know I wasn’t always...so outwardly nice t’you. Think I was a bit of a dick,” he said quietly. “Think it would make a lot of sense if y’found...someone that swept y’off your feet right away.”

She reached out and cupped the side of his face and leaned forward to kiss him on the lips briefly. “I need you, always. More than that...I want you,” she said softly. Harry felt like a lovesick teenager at her words. Wanting him really was so much better than needing him. Because she didn’t. She was wonderfully independent and had done so much on her own for so long, she really didn’t need him. But wanting him around? Harry loved her so much he wondered how he ever could have been without her. “So much it feels like I need you.”

He leaned forward to steal another kiss and she smiled, her glasses bumping his forehead a bit. “I love you,” he promised.

She smiled. “Would you like to know when I fell in love with you?” She asked.

He blinked at her response. “Well, sure,” he nodded.

“When you held my hand at the party and walked me to your room...it was like...I don’t know, I felt like a princess,” she told him. “You totally saved me. I had no plan. No escape. I just didn’t want to bother anyone.”

He smiled at the memory. “I loved sleeping with you,” he winked. She pushed him gently and shook her head. “No really, y’looked so cute in m’clothes. Wanted you t’stay in my bed forever.”

“I bet you did,” she mumbled.

“Ha-ha,” he rolled his eyes. “Never would have thought your cute mind would constantly sit in a gutter, kitten. Yes, of course I wanted that,” he grumbled making her laugh. “Really I jus’ wanted you.”

“You want me too?” She wrinkled her nose making her eyes crinkle at the corners and Harry turned fully to hold her face between his hands. He leaned in to brush his lips over hers like he did the first time he kissed her. She gave the same little whine she did. It went right through his heart.

“What gave it away?” He mumbled against her lips.

◊

“What if it’s hereditary?” She whispered in the dark.

Harry turned to face her even though he couldn’t see anything in the darkened room. He could feel her breath and the anxiety in her voice was so palpable he could feel her voice. “Then...who better to help them than you?”

She shook her head. “I wouldn’t wish this on the people that made fun of me,” she mumbled. “I can’t imagine a child like me,” she admitted quietly. “It was so hard.”

Harry frowned and inched closer to her. His nose bumped into hers, he brought his hand up to her cheek. What he said next, he meant whether he was part of the future or not. With everything in him, it was one of the truest things he ever told her. “I can’t think of a luckier child than one like you, m’love.”

◊

It wasn’t always about her eyes. There were pictures they took and vacations they enjoyed. He loved her family and how they made him feel like he was part of her holiday traditions. Gemma and his mum adored her and asked about her more than they asked about Harry.

She had the best jokes from books she read. Her art was beautiful and taking walks through the park with her were some of his favorite dates he’d ever been on.

It was five months in when he told her he loved her for the first time. “You are the most beautiful woman I know,” he said. She smiled at him with the lightest touch of pink painting her cheeks. She made him stop and proceeded to lie in the middle of the sidewalk to capture a picture of the sky between the branches of a tree on the unseasonably warm April day. Harry took his own picture of her doing just that. “See?” He asked, showing her the picture he took.

She looked at the picture momentarily and then back at him. “You think I’m beautiful?”

“Of course, kitten,” he rolled his eyes. “Inside and out; the kindness and warmth you have inside you is probably jus’ a fraction of the beauty y’display outwardly for someone like me that falls in love with you every time y’smile,” he grabbed her hand continued walking down the street enjoying the spring air. She was quiet for the length of the road and when they stopped to wait for the light to change at the crosswalk, she looked up at him at her side.

“You’re in love with me?” She asked.

He blinked in surprise, feeling a bit tongue tied. He chuckled awkwardly as he glanced at her. “Uh...sorry... I should have waited...said that in the privacy of your apartment...or mine, or something. Not in the middle of a busy street.”

She smiled and shook her head at him. “I love you, too.”

The light changed and back again, but neither of them noticed because he was too busy kissing her while the crowd moved around them.

◊

Sometimes she got so angry and frustrated with herself that she would accidentally take it out on Harry. Like the time she didn’t see how close her fingers were to the knife and nicked herself good. Not enough to need stitches or even a trip to the minute clinic, but enough to make Harry ooh and ahh over her. “Angel,” he murmured after she ripped her hand away from him.

“Stop,” she sniffed. She wasn’t in pain—at least not from her little wound she inflicted upon herself. “Just stop.”

He frowned and pressed his lips together trying not to overwhelm her with his worry. In those moments, he stood waiting patiently. Eventually she would say sorry, and he would shake his head. “You don’t have t’apologize t’me ever, m’love...not ‘bout this.”

He knew this was hard for her. Every time she hurt herself or dropped something, it was a reminder that her eyes weren’t working the way they were supposed to. The last thing he wanted was her spiraling and worrying about what would come next.

But he wanted her to know that whatever it was, he would be right beside her. Seeing for her even if she couldn’t.

*

December | Holiday Break | Lunch time

She never let Harry go into her appointments with her. However, he made sure he was the first one to meet her at the door right outside the office because her eyes were almost always dilated. It amplified how difficult it was for her to see where she was going. After nearly bumping into someone as she exited, she apologized awkwardly. Almost instantly, Harry was there looping her arm through his elbow. “Hey beautiful,” he said kissing the top of her head. He didn’t say anything else. Didn’t ask about the appointment. He knew better. She would say something if needed.

He opened her car door, helping her into the seat and placed sunglasses over her eyes to protect her widened pupils. He kissed the space where her forehead met her hairline and closed her safely in the car. Once inside the car himself, he drove off, planning to get her more coffee because she hated these appointments and Harry wanted to treat her for being brave even when she didn’t want to be. She leaned against the window and didn’t speak. Harry placed a hand on her leg, and she wrapped her fingers around his. He gave her a squeeze and continued driving silently.

“They have a new... cutting edge surgery they want me to try,” she whispered to the window.

He squeezed her hand again, glanced long enough to see her contemplative reflection in the glass. “How d’you feel about that?” He asked.

“Nervous.”

He smiled weakly. He wished he could look at her, but he knew talking about it was easier when he wasn’t looking at her—even if she couldn’t fully see him. Harry ordered at the drive through and then continued driving to a little spot by a lake. It was still so chilly outside—even at the warmest part of the day. There was steam coming off the water from the warmth of the sun beating off it. She took a picture of it on her phone and Harry knew the look of concentration on her face was trying to figure out how to recreate the steam in a painting.

They were sitting on the hood of his car. It was still warm from the engine and Harry had a blanket laid over their laps. She leaned back against the windshield holding the coffee cup upright to keep her hands warm. Harry turned to his side to look at her. He brought his hand to push her hair away from her forehead and he traced along her hairline. “Do y’want surgery?”

She sighed. “I wanna be able to see.”

He smiled gently and gave her cheek a kiss. “Will it...get worse? If y’try it?”

She shook her head. “No more than the risk of a regular surgery. It won’t be perfect. I’d still need glasses. I’ll still have trouble seeing. But...I won’t go blind. It’ll either stop it from getting worse or it won’t work,” she shrugged.

“Sounds like you have nothing t’lose then, angel,” he murmured.

She was quiet for a second. “I trace your face so much because I worry, I’ll never see it again,” she whispered. Harry was speechless...all those times he asked her what she was doing... He never thought that was her reason. “I want it to be muscle memory,” she explained. “So... if my eyes...if I can’t see anymore...I hope I can sculpt it from memory,” she whispered.

That beautiful word ‘if’ made his heart so full of love for her.

But, by far that was the most...genuine thing anyone had ever said to him. “God, I wish I dated you so much earlier,” he mumbled and leaned down to kiss her as deeply as he could manage while the cold December air cooled her coffee down once more while he gently traced his tongue along her lower lip.

Her cheeks turned this beautiful shade of red that Harry loved so much. The sunglasses over her eyes hid so much from him. He meant every word earlier. He loved her glasses so much, if only allowing him to see deeper into her soul. “If...it works though...” she whispered after a minute of kissing. He didn’t say anything because he sensed there was more, and she swallowed hard. “I’m scared I won’t be me...I feel like my whole life has been put on hold because of my eyes. I don’t know if I know how to live without... thinking about them.”

“Then we’ll learn t’live without thinking ‘bout them,” he shrugged reaching for a piece of her hair and stroking it like a paint brush across her face. “You’re more than your eyes, kitten.”

Her heart felt so warm at his words. Harry always made the well-being of her eyes an effort for the two of them. It wasn’t a battle she faced alone. Harry was there the whole time encouraging her, helping her, keeping a literal eye on things for her when she couldn’t. It didn’t bother him when she cried about not seeing something. When she bumped into walls or doors, he never said anything other than to make sure she was alright. If she dropped something and made a mess, he simply helped her clean it up. Harry was her personal chauffeur, and he didn’t care at all.

“To be fair m’love, I would be driving y’around anyway because you’re a lady and I adore you and m’mum taught me t’hold car doors open for the women I adore. And I’d rather drive and keep y’safe... plus you’re a terrible driver even when y’can see. S’a danger to you, me, and everyone else on the road.”

“We wouldn’t...” she whispered quietly and shook her head, looking away from him.

“Wouldn’t what, m’love?” He murmured looking at her with a frown on his lips. Worry etched between his eyes.

“We wouldn’t...be in love...if it weren’t for the fact I can’t see,” she reminded him and turned to look back at his expectant face waiting for her to complete her thought. “I wouldn’t have spilled food on you. You wouldn’t have sat up front and asked if I couldn’t see. There wouldn’t have been writing notes for me or making sure I was okay at that party or at the pub...”

“Kitten, I learned t’read Braille for you. I don’t care if y’can see or not. I would do anything for you. I may have fallen for you because you couldn’t see but I don’t stay because of it. I stay because I adore you.”

“What?” She whispered breathlessly. She sat up fully while Harry stayed lying flat against the windshield. “You learned...you did what?”

He shrugged. “M’probably not very good at it. But I don’t know...thought if it came down to it, if it got worse and you were sad...I’d want t’help.”

Harry saw the tear slip down her cheek past her sunglasses. “Harry Styles,” she practically sighed. “You are...I don’t know...”

“The love of your life, maybe?” He smiled cutely and reached up to rub the tear from her cheek.

For the second time in her life, she had so much hope swelling in her heart. Harry, the cause of it once more. “And hopefully every life I’ve ever have and ever will live.”

--

general taglist: @justlemmeadoreyou @daydreamingofmatilda @tiredinwinter

I'm sorry if I missed anyone in the taglist. Please let me know if you'd like to join, if it didn't work, if you no longer want to be included, etc. :)

[boxboxblog]

Track Analysis: Las Vegas Strip Circuit

Hello, this is part of a series I am doing to the circuits. I will be releasing the ones I did not do during the current season over the Winter break. Enjoy!

So, this 3.8 mile street circuit track is in, you guessed it, Las Vegas. It is the newest circuit added to the calendar, with its debut year being 2023, which means that we only really have one race to understand it right now. It's surrounded by the glitz and glamor of Vegas, and leads drivers down the strip itself. The top speed of this track is around 212 mph, making it a very speedy one indeed, rare thing for a street circuit.

Sector 1:

Turns 1-2: Shortly after the start, this is a big hairpin section. Turn one is very sharp and can lead to a lot of early-race drama, and turn 2 is only slightly less so. These two areas require heavy braking and a lot of precision

Turns 3-4: After exiting the tightness of the first two turns, they go into turns 3 and a4, much gentler, but a shift in direction. Medium to high speed area so they have to use smooth throttle application here

Koval Straightway: Relatively long straight, nothing much to be said here. They must be prepared to brake properly at the end for the tighter corner right after that leads into sector 2. Also, the first DRS zone.

Turn 5 (or 5G): Rather tight turn, heavy braking necessary and a focus on strong exit speed for the next part.

Sector 2:

Turn 6: The first turn in an intense technical sequence, this is the gentle introduction. A longer more sweeping turn, drivers must be prepared to brake and prepare for the upcoming chicane.

Turns 7-9: Chicane section, very technically difficult. Drivers need great precision and mechanical grip, like in most chicanes, but then need to prepare for acceleration after exiting turn 9.

Mini-Straight: Not really a straight, but this area between 9 and 10 is a little too long to not be noticed. This is where drivers pick up a lot of speed.

Turn 10-11: These are wide corners, and a flat out section. High speed, and very aggressive are of the track, but they must prepare for the tighter upcoming turn.

Turn 12: A rough sharp turn after such a winding and fast area, there have been many incidents at this turn, even with only one GP under the belt.

Sector 3:

Mini straight: Reintroduction to the high-speed aspects of this track.

Turn 11: Very slight turn, barely one in my opinion. A slight kink that drivers take fast before entering a long straight.

The Strip Straight: Second main straight, and the second DRS zone, this is quite a long one (one of the longest in F1). Max speed, slipstreams, overtakes, the works. An aggressive change comes after this.

Turns 14-16: The second major technical section, this chicane is tight and the main challenge comes from decelerating properly after The Strip Straight, getting through it quick, and then accelerating to the end.

East Harmon Avenue Straight: A push flat out to the end, drivers built a ton of speed here and the exit onto this straight is highly important.

Turn 17: Last turn, gentler and right before the finish line. Taken at full throttle much like the straight before it, and driver finish fast.

Strategy:

There is a lot to consider with this track. It has a mix of very high speed straights and two sections of tight chicanes, so a balanced set up is usually preferred. These big shifts also cause a lot of wear on tires, and this (at least last year) is a one-stop track. This means tire management is paramount. Another thing to consider is the weather. This November race is one of the colder ones, as desert temperature drops at night, and so they really have to keep an eye on grip levels and making sure tires remain warm. This can be a challenge, especially because they are combining this with the need to keep tries from degrading fast for a one-stop (i.e get too hot), and so it really is a precision-based race. The final thing I want to discuss around strategy is the overtaking opportunities. Vegas is a very overtake heavy track, and last year almost every single corner and straight on the track had multiple overtakes done on them. So this means drivers must be prepared to battle, and to acknowledge that starting position isn't everything here. While this may not be the most complicated or difficult race on the calendar, it's a race where the drivers keep each other on their toes.

Upsides and Downsides:

So, I think most people are aware that you either hate or love the Las Vegas track, for a multitude of reasons. Beyond being a race track, this venue is also a stage. There is more of everything; more media, more spectacle, more glamor. Some people really enjoy this aspect, other hate it. Getting into the track itself, one downside is that the temporary aspect of this track means grip is very low in the beginning of the weekend. Practice sessions are not very representative due to this, and so you never really know how a car is going to do when it comes down to it. Also, being in the desert, the track gets very dusty which also impacts the grip levels. On the flipside, the smoothness of this track is less rough on suspensions and less punishing on setups than some other tracks. This means less wear on the drivers and the cars.

Alright, so that is my overview of the Las Vegas Strip track. I will see you tomorrow (or tonight depending on you time zone) for qualifying.

Cheers,

-B

[rainspicestudios]

Happy 2025! [RainSpice Studios plans & updates for the new year]

Hey everyone! Happy 2025 from RainSpice Studios. I hope this year will be kind to everyone and that many good things will be coming your way.

And speaking of good things, I'm cooking some projects that are just itching to be released and available for download. But before we get into that, let us talk a little about the games that were released in 2024.

This won't be a lengthy recap of 2024, as the games speak for themselves, but I am still proud of myself for releasing a full game, a chapter one, and a demo, during a very stressful year both in terms of world events and my personal life (I graduated college, I'm moving, all of that good stuff).

Stardust★Arcadis was my first ever release, and a game I struggled to finish. I lost all of my progress because of PC issues, I rewrote the story a few times, and I released it after working on it since 2019 (2022 if the moment when my PC broke doesn't count). However I love the characters, I love the setting, and despite the many hardships of game development, I had a fun time working on it.

I'm planning to release more games in this universe in the future, including a remastered version of St★Ar.

The Code of Crystals started as a novel collaboration with my best friend. Said collaboration never got finished, and I had a lot of inspiration for stories I could tell with these characters, most of these darker than the original project. Thus I used the characters I made for this former collaboration and started crafting this narrative, and the release of Stardust★Arcadis AND the 2024 edition of Phantasia Jam was a perfect opportunity to get started!

Chapter one will be re-release this January and Chapter two will be released in either late 2025 or early 2026. Stay tuned for more info!

Enter the Eternity, oddly enough, also started as a collaboration, but the idea of a dating simulator with magical girls was too good to let it collect dust and never get finished, especially since its inspiration board kept drawing me in.

With my best friend's blessing, I could re-use the idea, so I created a new cast of characters and got to work, and had to do even more work after I found out that the backgrounds I bought from someone on itch.io were made with an AI image generator, which disgusted me so much it powered me to redraw every single background by hand and I will keep doing so for the entire game. While it is more work to do on my part, RainSpice Studios will never endorse AI generation in any shape or form.

At first I worked on it while I worked on Stardust★Arcadis, which explains why the demo was done on such a short notice, but it has now became my primary project for 2025 and I am aiming to release it around November/December at best.

What's the plan for 2025 then?

My primary goal is to release Enter the Eternity and my secondary goal is to release The Code of Crystals chapter 2.

I aim to finish all first dates for Enter the Eternity AND re-release chapter 1 of The Code of Crystals in January. The dates are already written and coded in the script files, so my focus is to add in all the sprite expressions, draw CGs and backgrounds, and add all the necessary music. As for TCOC, I wanted to remake its menus and add a scene with Eranis that I did not have time to add before the end of the game jam. While the UI code I bought doesn't work, its images are pretty, and I am happy with the result.

2025 will be another busy year for me as I try to find a full-time job to sustain myself, launch some new projects more-or-less related to video games, move out again, among some other irl things. But here at RainSpice Studios, I love making games, and will keep making them for the foreseeable future.

If you read down to here, thank you so much!

There's a lot to do so I'm going back to work 💪 I'll update you guys when I reach a milestone or I find something interesting to share.

So stay tuned! And as said, I wish you guys a kind, good, exciting, fun, and game-filled 2025. Thank you for your continued support and here's to more projects this year 🥂

============================

[RainSpice Studios itch.io] [Stardust★Arcadis] [The Code of Crystals] [Enter The Eternity]

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 12th November ✨

I’ve LOVED everything that’s touched my ears this week. Going to start this round up with a brand new instant favourite 🧡

🧳 Travelling Light (1) we all knew that whatever @monstrousproductions ’s next venture was, it would be bloody brilliant but Travelling Light is so far up my street, it’s parked in my drive. I LOVE wholesome sci-fi and this show promises to be that and more. I can’t wait for the next episode! 🥰


👁️ @malevolentcast (37) we’re on a farm! and it’s bloody horrible!!! Poor Oscar, man. If God did bring him to Arthur then God has a funny little sense of humour.

🌒 @monkeymanproductions I finally found time to listen to the Jaxon bonus episode and it was so lovely 🥺 I love the pair of them so much and it was so nice learn more about the past while hearing their plans for the future! I also can’t wait to hear the next one!!

🏛 @the-mistholme-museum UNCERTAIN. Unlike the head of retrieval, I am a big fan of time travel shit and it was done in such a fun way in this episode. The security issue has become even more of a mystery!! Part of me can’t wait to get to the bottom of it and part of me doesn’t want the show to end 😅

🧛‍♂️ @re-dracula It’s over!! I never would have made it through the dailies without this wonderful audio experience. A huge congrats to the cast and crew for all their hard work!!

🐬 @patterspod I listened to the glow while cycling into work yesterday and it was great but it sure set me up in a strange mood for the day ahead

🌨️ HELL YEAH @thewhitevault (2). Let’s explore how humans contribute to the horrors. This whole situation in the woods is horrifying and one of my absolute favourite things about this show is how natural the acting is, it’s all too believable and it makes it so much scarier.

Hope everyone has had a good week!! I’m planning on trying to finish Wolf 359 next week… I don’t know if I’m emotionally ready!!

[comfortlesshurt]

alrighty, I locked in for a couple days and now I get to reward myself by yelling into the tumblr void about the series progress

first off, there are TWO FICS over 50% done, v exciting stuff. I know they've been over 50% for a bit now, but like... let me have my motivation, okay? we are in the HARD PART of the project where it all looks overwhelming, so I'll take the wins I can

also tex fic is finished and through round 1 of editing. it still needs another major edit and i need to finish fic 1 to make sure no info conflicts between the two, but the serious work for that is done

there are a few more days left before NotNaNo, but even going in with today's word counts, focusing on fics 1 and 2 should put them pretty close to finished by the end of November unless I was super off with the word count estimate

also had a really good writing day yesterday!

ignore those date projections at the bottom because like... those assume either i write 3k every day or i write 3k twice a week and 1.2k the other 5 days, and I canNOT do that consistently. but that July 23rd date is realistic! that's me continuing to hit my average based on the past 106 days since starting this project, so there's a good chance I finish this project in a total of just over a year (in which case I will never shut up about writing 450k in a year, so watch out)

finally, fic 1 is a huge portion of that daily par number in the first row, so... unless I fall majorly away from the intended timeline, that required daily par will go down a LOT at the end of december, which will be nice. the goal is still to focus a lot on this project and only really jump over to side projects as they call to me, but it's easier to do that when your average isn't struggling to keep up with your daily par number. it simply does not feel good to be constantly working just to barely get over the par.

as far as editing, i'm starting to fear i didn't budget enough time for that in my early projections, so the timeline might be off there. those due dates listed are for the final rough draft, which doesn't get a chance to rest before immediately going into a month of editing. something just tells me now that a month isn't going to be enough to cover a content edit for each fic. it's also relying on the technical edits being done week-to-week as each chapter goes up.

also added one more tracking tool recently:

this is to look at all the projects week-to-week, and really what it's done is made it obvious that I am in fact very focused on fic 1 lmao. in my defense, that's the one that has consistently had the highest required par, so it's easy to treat it as the most important. also, up to 27-aug is rough. I started writing these fics in Word, so I didn't have day-to-day stats to go back and check. I could only find those once I switched to Reedsy, so for the record I did not write 54k between 20-aug and 27-aug. same with the tex fic--that wasn't all written in one week.

this chart still only looks at ILaD progress, so you can see where I take my break in October and it cuts down a lot... but that's excluding the 10k that went into an unrelated fic, so I don't think taking this break has actually cut down on my writing much. it's just made me have a better time with it temporarily. i took a couple days off writing completely during October but like... I didn't really enjoy that? so I don't think that's the solution I'm looking for long-term.

anyway, thanks for coming to my ted talk. i will infodump again, and probably soon since all the end of the month posts are coming up in the next week.

[sunflowervoltwentyeight]

Hi! This is a fic rec of my favorite established relationship fics. These fics are organized by word count from longest to shortest. You can view my other fic recs here. Enjoy!

We Are Only Just the Beginning by afirecannotdie (129k)

In the dim light of a dorm kitchen, Harry Styles meets a boy who flips his life upside down. Three years later, he's a senior in college, ready to take on the world with the love of his life by his side. And then Louis Tomlinson admits he doesn't know what he wants to do after college after all, and Harry's world flips again, this time not so pleasantly. He can't imagine his life without Louis, but he's starting to worry he might have to.

A college AU featuring lots of domestic sappiness, waffles, tattoos, late nights and early mornings, and above all, Louis and Harry against the world.

Been Together Since Way Back When by alivingfire / @alivingfire (95k)

Louis Tomlinson is a law student with a simple but effective four step plan: 1. Finish law school. 2. Get hired somewhere awesome. 3. Marry his best friend and boyfriend of two years, Harry. 4. Live happily ever after.

Harry Styles doesn't know what he wants to do with his life, where he wants to go, who he wants to be, or if he even wants the college degree he's almost completed. All he does know is who he’ll be with forever, as long as Louis wants to keep him around.

Or: the painfully realistic college au where everyone's poor, lovesick, tired of school, terrified of the future, and still having the greatest times of their lives.

Such Good Luck by casuallyhl / @casuallyhl (66k)

Louis smiles at Harry’s words, leaning into his touch. “Tell me again.”

Smiling, Harry takes Louis into his arms. Pressing gentle kisses to his face, Harry murmurs, “In six months’ time, I will have my twenty-fifth birthday. On that day, my portion of the inheritance will become legally mine. And I plan that very day to announce to my family that I have found love.” Harry chuckles as he runs his lips lightly along Louis’ cheekbone. “That, in fact, I found love when I was twenty-one years old, and that I have loved and been loved every day since.”

Or, an Edwardian AU where Harry is a young aristocratic lord and Louis is a working class dairy farmer. Secrets are a necessary part of their relationship, but Louis has one that could topple their whole world.

The Dark and the Dentist by sunshiner (66k)

“I know this song,” Louis whispers, and Harry has to lean his ear toward him to pick up what he’s saying. “It was written for people to dance to it. We should be dancing.”

We can’t, Harry almost spits, but it’d be stupid of him. Louis knows they can’t. Even if he looks like any regular Parisian in their twenties, and Harry looks like any hipster Parisian in their twenties, they can’t anyway. To be fair, they probably wouldn’t do it even if they were out. But if they were two uni students, both in Paris for an exchange, meeting over fallen books at the library, or because of mutual friends, or watching Monet’s Water Lilies?

“How would we dance?” Harry murmurs, mouth almost pressed to Louis’ cheek, so close he can feel his warmth. What a picture they must make, two millionaires freezing in a park and dreaming of a different life.

An account of the events of November 2014. Canon-compliant.

Time Passed by coffinofachimera (66k)

Louis struggles with their relationship as Harry grows into his identity.

Hands Clasped Tight by afirethatcannotdie / @afirethatcannotdie (47k)

“What am I looking at here?” Harry asks.

“This, my friends, is a ‘proof’ Instagram account, run by your students,” Liam announces.

“It’s got all this stuff about how the two of you are together,” Niall adds.

“I heard about that,” says one of the math teachers. “Confiscated a kid’s phone today when they were looking at it. I have to say, the evidence that you’re dating is pretty damning.”

“Really,” Louis says dryly. “Do you think being married for three years might have something to do with it?”

Or the one where Harry and Louis are high school teachers and their students have been playing matchmaker for over a year. Little do they know, Harry and Louis are already married.

The Best Kind of Bad by wildestdreams / @thelavendrhaze (40k)

Nobody really understood Harry and Louis. Not even Louis. But for Louis, the world began and ended with Harry, and there were certain things he just wasn’t capable of explaining.

or Louis is the town troublemaker and everyone hates him except for Harry.

You Watched Me Sink by bananasandboots / @anylessreal (38k)

They’ve discussed it a few times - the boyfriend thing. It’s not like it’s some forbidden, horrific, abandon hope all ye who talk about furthering the relationship sort of subject. They’re mature adults. They’re in tune with their feelings, their hearts’ desires, the way those butterflies swoop in their bellies whenever they so much as hold each other’s hands. They like each other. A lot. It’s mutual, they know. But for now, they’re just content to enjoy the simplicity of what they have, and what they have is great.

When dating in secret stops being enough, then they’ll discuss that too.

Or, the one where Harry teaches Sex Ed and sneaks around with the drama teacher, and doesn’t realize how out of tune he is with his true feelings until everyone else figures it out for him.

Part 1 of You Watched Me Sink Verse

Swallow My Words by YesIsAWorld / @louandhazaf (32k)

Senior year is stressful. On top of balancing school work, family, and friends, Harry's lacrosse team is vying to win the state championship, he's not sure where he's going to college yet, and he has a secret boyfriend that no one can know about.

Part 1 of Swallow My Words

Loved By Your Mother by superglass / @gaymoustache (31k)

Harry stretches out like Venus with her lover, growing sleepy in the late afternoon light with a baby growing inside her. Perhaps not literally, not physically. Not exactly.

or

Harry struggles to come to terms with wanting to have children, and what that means for their relationship. Canon compliant, set a few years into the future.

True Love’s Gold by alivingfire / @alivingfire (27k)

Gemma starts responding to every single one of Harry’s texts—regardless of subject—with i don’t care, talk to louis. Liam lets Harry complain to him for hours on Skype, pretending he’s not doing other things while Harry whines about his problems. Niall thinks the whole thing is hilarious, texting Harry links to articles titled So, you want your man to propose? and 15 ways to get him ready for the aisle! and follows each of these up with page upon page of laughing emojis. Harry tries everything, literally everything he can think of short of grabbing Louis by tattooed forearm and yelling, “PROPOSE TO ME BEFORE I COMBUST.”

Or, it takes a village to arrange a proposal, but that doesn’t mean it’s going to go as planned.

If You Asked Me If I Love Him (I'd Lie) by allyasavedtheday (26k)

So Harry and Louis might have fucked up.

The day of their wedding was the single most perfect moment of Louis’ life and every single day since where he’s been able to call Harry his husband has been nothing short of bliss. There’s just one teeny, tiny problem…

Their families don’t know they’re married.

*

Or the one where Harry and Louis eloped but neglected to mention it to anyone. Meanwhile Lottie is getting married and the only way for them to not steal her thunder is by pretending they're just friends for the weekend. Featuring Harry and Louis as terrible liars who don't know the meaning of the word platonic and some Tomlinsons and Styles's who definitely don't believe them.

Part 2 of A Long Way From The Playground

Being of the Jealous Kind by zita17 / @louisandtheaquarian (24k)

A-list actor Louis Tomlinson and his partner fashion photographer Harry Styles weather the storm that is Louis’ fake relationship with his costar in the lead up to this year’s Academy Awards.

Featuring a fluffy teenage meet-cute, an angsty wine drunk Harry melting down over pap pics, Louis habitually overusing the word “baby,” and cameos by a vintage Umbro sweatshirt, the peace ring, and one hell of a Larry hug.

Or the justice for To Be So Lonely fic. Based on the lyrics to TBSL and a prompt where “Louis has to fake date some celebrity, while his boyfriend Harry sits at home.”

You Turn Me On, Make You Radiate by ballsdeepinjesus (15k)

When he presses inside for the first time in weeks, he’s pretty sure he sees stars behind his eyes at the staggering sensation of Harry’s body squeezing every inch of him. When he bottoms out, he stays buried inside for a minute just to catch his bearings, listening as Harry takes sharp breaths beneath him. When he finally feels like he’s under control, he presses his lips against Harry’s ear and whispers, “Are you ready husband?“

Harry throws his head back and groans. “Call me your spouse.”

[…or, a self-indulgent snapshot of hl’s sex lives over the course of 10+ years]

Garden of Edenby superglass / @gaymoustache (6k)

Another soft, grainy laugh. A puff from the joint. Green smoke towards the ceiling. Then hazy blue eyes back on his. “Said you wanted to tell me something. Was really important.”

“Oh,” Harry says. There was a reason he came back, an excuse he made up to find Louis and sucker him into letting him sit on his lap even though his weight often puts those thighs to sleep. “Can’t— um. Let me try to remember.”

or

a snapshot of being high and in love in Jamaica.

I'll Breathe Your Air Into My Lungs by blizzies (5k)

five phases of their relationship in a world where harry smokes a lot and skips school and hates everyone except his boyfriend and louis is in plays and is loved by everyone and they work even though nobody gets how.

Mon Petit, Little One by publunchesownmyass (5k)

They smoke, talk shit about everyone besides each other, and Harry wears his Mon Petit sweater.

Brown Skin and Lemon Over Ice by penceypansy / @penceypansy (2k)

A short one shot of a reunion in Italy, around the time Harry filmed the Golden video.

- He should know with more certainty which one is their bedroom but he’s only been here twice, only once since their things had moved in, and come to think of it, he’s not sure this is the room they slept in last time.

Regardless, he’s got clothes he knows are his hanging in the wardrobe, sees his old Stone Roses shirt crumpled and worn on the unmade side of the bed. He drops his bag, rummages through the drawers for a pair of trunks, goes into the bathroom to change. It doesn’t feel like enough of a home yet for him to be totally comfortable, but that should change soon enough. He can’t help a spray of the cologne sat by the sink, vanilla and wood and comfort.

[s4bbatical]

YOUR GIRL | Part 4. Patrick Zweig x Female!Reader

Pairing: Patrick Zweig x female!reader, Tashi Duncan x female!reader (platonic)

Summary: After your parents announce their divorce, you're sent to New York to pursue your passion for the arts at NYU. Your cousin, the infamous tennis player Tashi Duncan, introduces you to her insufferable colleagues at a house party in the upper east side. Already a sore thumb from rural Canada, Patrick can't help but find interest in an untouched territory.

Word Count: 5,5k

Warnings: Foul language, mention of cannabis.

MINORS DNI

Notes: The timeline is inaccurate in comparison to the film, this is an AU. All characters introduced are barely in their early 20s, unless stated otherwise. No use of y/n.

Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.

CHAPTER FOUR: “Sutphin Boulevard”

"Believer - monologue exemplifies a lust. It's so true."

You didn't really like November.

The month between Halloween and Christmas was as useless as a trust fund kid hosting a charity event, which you did in fact have to attend with Tashi right after your exam week. Thankfully, you were not obligated to be present on campus besides exams and classes, giving you the excuse to not face your problems anywhere. You knew running away from it wouldn't last forever. However, it was the only thing you could do for now.

The first two weeks of November, Tashi and Chloe take turns spending time with you, making sure you weren't alone with your thoughts for too long. You tried to focus on your studies, excelling in them due to the lack of outside obstacles. You no longer wanted to attend gatherings as it was another way to run into him, only leaving your house if it was necessary.

Tashi had told your grandmother about the reason why you had taken the life of a hermit, so she gave you a position at her flower shop, thinking it would be nice to distract yourself from the noise.

All you could do was think about it, really. What you would do if he apologized, what would he say, and what would you say if he really wanted you. Or wanted nothing to do with you. You couldn't help it. You even made a pro and cons list on your phone when you were on the subway earlier that day, swearing to yourself as you thought you saw him sitting in the next cart over. It was not him. You weren't even in his neighborhood, for god's sake. It was you who had chose to cut contact with him, and you knew it was up to you if you wished to reconcile.

You stood behind the counter at work, busying yourself with bouquet assembly as Chloe wandered around the shop aimlessly.

"How many orders can you possibly get in one day?" Your best friend says, grabbing a lily and sniffing it before putting it back in it's place.

"The people are very grateful for Thanksgiving, you know." You say, tying up your 10th order of the afternoon. "If you're bored then you can help me out." You suggest to Chloe, who pretends to think in deep thought for a moment.

"I'm okay, thanks though." She smiles, taking bite of her shawarma wrap that she bought across the street. She had gotten you one as well, which you already devoured about an hour ago. "So," She starts speaking, swallowing her food. "You feel like coming out of hiding for the Manhattan holiday market? We could go skating, too. Tis the season!" She says in a sing-song voice, shimmying her shoulders.

You laugh, starting another order. "Yeah, sure. I used to be a figure skater when I was younger, actually." You admit, putting away the last order of the day.

"Seriously? How am I hearing about this now?" Chloe asks, taking another bite of her wrap.

You shrug. "I haven't done it since I graduated high school. My parents..." You trail off, recalling the pain and anger of the divorce. It tore your house apart. "They didn't wanna pay for it anymore." You simply say, smiling slightly.

Chloe nods, finishing her last bite. "Well then it's settled. When's your shift over?" She asks.

"Well... technically I'm done the orders for today, but I have to stay around for another two hours." You say, glancing at the time on your phone.

"That's fine. I'll just do my homework here then." She says, grinning. "That okay?"

"Course, Chloe. You know I appreciate your company, I love ya." You say, deciding to pull out your new read from your bag.

"Awe, I love you too." She giggles. She takes a moment before speaking again. "Have you.. heard from him at all?" She asks timidly.

You frown slightly, your heart dropping. "No. Why?"

"Oh, okay." Chloe says, fiddling with her hands. "He asked me about you the other day." She looks up at you. "He's really sorry about what happened, you know."

"Good, he better be." You say curtly, tucking your hair behind your ear.

"I think you should talk to him." Chloe says abruptly. "I-I know you don't want to see him and you know I don't like the guy." She laughs before continuing. "But he looked devastated dude. Like, really upset that I wouldn't tell him anything about you." She says, pursing her lips with a sympathetic look. She stares at you, but you say nothing. "Just think about it, okay? It might be nice for you guys to resolve things. I know you're not happy about it either." She says.

"Yeah, I will." You say flatly, trying to focus on your novel. "I have more important things to do than think about that."

"Sorry but, were you there when you literally complained about it for half an hour over margaritas for movie night two days ago?" She recalls, raising a brow.

You shift your body from one foot to the other. "I was drunk, everyone complains about stupid shit when they're drunk." You argue, trying to read your book.

Chloe scoffs. "You're really stubborn, you know that?" She says, closing your book.

"Hey I was reading that!" You say, glaring at her.

"You can't keep avoiding him forever." Chloe says sternly. She sighs when she sees you frown. "I'm sorry, I just care about you a lot dude. I don't want you to keep feeling this way. You care about him, and he cares about you too. I can tell." She says softly, crossing her arms.

You hold your face in your hands, groaning like an overstimulated child. "If it'll make you happy," You throw your arms out in defeat. "I'll talk to him! Fine!" You exclaim.

"Thank you! Finally!" Chloe exasperates, mirroring your actions. "Jesus, Tashi owes me twenty dollars." She breathes out.

You gasp. "You guys betted on me?!"

Chloe stammers. "I-I uh, nooo..." You squint your eyes at her. "...Yes?" She squeaks. "Please don't be mad! We both wanted this to be over with!" She explains, holding your arms. "It's out of love."

A customer then walks in, causing the both of you to go quiet.

"We'll talk about this later." You mutter. "Hello! Welcome!" You greet the customer warmly. "Can I interest you in our Thanksgiving arrangements?"

-

"Do you think I should get this ornament for her? She likes cats." Chloe asks, holding up a felt ornament that resembled an orange tabby cat.

"You've literally been on one date." You point out.

"And? Have you ever heard of lesbianism?" Chloe retorts, putting the decoration back down.

"I thought you were all for breaking stereotypes, not becoming the definitive version of one." You jest, looking around.

Before hitting the rink, you and Chloe decided to see the Christmas market in downtown Manhattan. The various different stalls of gifts and treats galore were very alluring, but god was it expensive. You had decided to buy a hot coco the size of your hand made from pure chocolate, and that alone was creating a dent in your wallet.

"God Christ everything is so expensive." You say, although you knew your statement didn't make any difference. Most of the vendors were trying to make an income, it wasn't their fault. Well, for the most part at least.

"That's what makes it a New York Christmas, baby." Chloe states, doing some weird shake with her hands that resembled jazz hands.

"The closest thing we had to this back at home was my next door neighbor selling mulled wine for ten dollars." You explain flatly. "Capitalism is a beautiful thing." You hum, already finishing your hot chocolate. "I already finished my three ounce drink, what a pity." You say sarcastically, discarding it in a nearby bin.

"Let's just go skating then. I'm kind of over this too." Chloe says, rubbing her hands together. "Fuck my hands are cold." She complains, breathing on them heavy to warm them up.

"Didn't I remind you to pack gloves like four times this morning?" You recount, pulling out a spare pair from your messenger bag. "Take these."

"How would I survive with you?" Chloe says, kissing your cheek gingerly.

You grimace, wiping your cheek. "I'm surprised you haven't died yet, to be honest." You joke, the both of you laughing.

-

The two of you make it to the Wollman rink in Central Park, and to no surprise, had to buy admission.

"I can't believe it costed ten dollars to skate for an hour." You complain, tying up your rental skates.

Chloe doesn't respond right away, distracted by texting someone on her phone. You clear your throat.

"Huh?" She says looking up from her phone and putting it away in her pocket. "What were you saying?"

"Nevermind man." You say, dismissing your statement.

The two of you climb onto the ice, only taking a few strides before your skills came back to you. You held back a laugh as Chloe's legs wobbled, unable to let go of the railing.

"Chloe, it's not that hard I promise. Just push yourself forward." You say, reaching out to her. "You can hold onto me if you want!"

"Fuck no, I'm chill." She states firmly, putting a hand up. "Just give me some time to warm up. Go do some laps or something." She reassures, gesturing for you to go ahead.

"Alright then." You shrug, turning away. You glide gracefully across the ice, feeling the spirit of the holidays warm you up as Last Christmas By Wham! plays over the speakers. You're doing forward and backward spins, overjoyed by the reconnection of your old passion. You're grinning madly as you smoothly skate between people, nearby children very entertained by your moves.

You try to find Chloe, who seems to have disappeared. Confused, you slow down your pace, yet keep gliding in circles. You turn and face one of the entrances to the ice, seeing the last person you'd ever expect to.

Patrick is standing there, watching you from the edge of the rink.

You forget how to stop yourself, causing the loss of balance. Before you realize what's happening, you've landed on your back. You groan loudly as the ice makes contact with your body, knowing you were going to feel it tomorrow. "Shit." You whisper, wincing as you sit up and hold your head. That's what you get for being too cocky with your strides.

You hear the scuffling of shoes beside you, looking up to make eye contact with Patrick.

He looks at you with concern, a sheepish smile on his face. "If I was supposed to catch you, I did not get the memo." He jokes, offering a hand.

You glare at him, getting up by yourself and ignoring his offer to help. "Why are you here?" You ask passive aggressively, skating past him to step off the ice.

"To talk to you!" He exclaims, trying to keep pace with you. He nearly slips at least three times before stepping off the rink.

You're flustered, and very annoyed with his presence. "Well, you've spoken! You may leave now." You say bitterly, walking over to the worker in charge of shoe rentals in order to get your boots back.

"No, don't do this right now." Patrick pleas. He awkwardly waits for you as you ignore him, retrieving your shoes then sitting down on a bench to change out your skates. "Chloe said you wanted to talk, so I came here." He admits, crouching in front of you to meet your eyes. He places a hand on your knee.

You glare at him. "Chloe told you to come here? No wonder she was on her phone so much." You mutter, taking off your skates and also knocking off his touch from your knee.

"Can we please go somewhere else and talk?" He asks, nearly begging you on his knees. You continue to pretend you don't hear him, putting on your shoes then getting up to hand over your skates to the worker, thanking him.

"You can't ignore me forever." Patrick exasperates, getting up and following you as you start walking away from the rink.

"Where's Chloe?" You ask yourself, looking around for your friend.

"She's with Art," Patrick explains. You finally look at him, confused. "He came with me." He says.

You roll your eyes, readjusting your scarf as the two of you continue to walk through the park. You finally decide to sit down on a nearby bench, allowing space for Patrick to sit beside you. You didn't feel like walking away from him anymore.

He does so hesitantly, looking at you from the corner of his eye. "We've both been avoiding each other," He says calmly, sighing. "I don't understand why."

You stay quiet, looking forward.

"Are you choosing to become a mute right now?" He asks, still no response from you. "Fine, alright then." He says, leaning back against the bench. "I've missed this, you know. Your stubbornness." He says, now looking right at you, the side of your face at least. "And you." He adds quietly.

You then finally look at him, your heart skipping a beat as the two of you make eye contact. "Anything else?" You say flatly, as if it was obvious that he would miss someone as great as you.

Patrick scoffs, laughing as well. "Nope, that's it." He jokes, sitting up straight. "I um, I wanted to apologize." His tone switches, sounding very sincere. "What happened last month was very out of line, and I shouldn't have done what I did. I guess I didn't like the fact that your attention wasn't on me for some selfish reason, but that doesn't mean I should've kissed you." He admits, sighing. "That was very uncool, and I shouldn't have led you on like that." He finishes.

You look down at the ground for a moment, taking in his words. You wanted to tell him that you wish he'd kiss you like he meant it, not that he was being selfish and thinking with his groin. You knew what was best, and feeling a little hesitant about accepting his apology.

"Can you please say something?" He says quietly, frowning at you slightly.

You look back up at him. "I'm not sure what you want me to say." You mumble, tucking a loose piece of hair behind your ear. "I have been thinking this over a lot, you know." You look up at him. "I'm also sorry for how I reacted. You didn't deserve for me to just cut you off without explanation." You reason.

Patrick smiles weakly at you. "Don't apologize please. I deserved that. Made me more insightful if anything." He tries to joke, shrugging his shoulders.

"Yeah, you needed that more than most." You joke, nudging Patrick. He chuckles slightly. "I forgive you." You finally say, smiling at him. "I-"

"But-" He starts to say.

"Sorry, go ahead." You say.

"No, you first." He insists.

You nod, taking a moment. You're grateful for his apology, that is evident. However, you have to make a decision for the better. You're not just looking to fill the void of what you thought could've been, but rather to move forward in a healthy way. If he didn't feel the same, it wasn't worth confessing to anything.

"I want us to be friends, Patrick." You say adamantly, looking at Patrick for a response. You watch as his face falters, quickly covering it up with a meek smile.

"I think that's a good idea, yeah." He says, although not sounding very confident in his own words.

You search in his face whether or not he was lying. You couldn't read him, you were never good at it. "You don't sound so sure of yourself." You say, laughing awkwardly.

Patrick shakes his head, smiling even more. "Sorry, I am. I want us to be friends." He says affirmatively, although he wasn't sure if he was just saying out loud to convince himself.

"Good." You smile. "I missed you too, dumbass." You say, raising your hand for a high five.

Patrick stares at you for a moment, laughing before smacking your hand with his own. "You're so fucking weird."

You gasp. "What? I'm not a big hugger." You say in defense.

"That's fine." Patrick says, sticking his hands in his pockets and leaning back. "I didn't wanna hug you anyways." He shrugs.

You eye him closely for a few moments before going in, hugging him from the side hastily. His eyes widen, letting your warmth fill him up before he slowly hugs you back. He wouldn't say it out loud, but he really liked the sensation of getting a hug from you, even if it was against your own wishes.

-

A few days later, Patrick is spending the night at your place. You had both met up to do homework together earlier that day, you suggesting if he wanted to come over to watch some comedy movies together.

"How is a sheet of moist supposed to make my skin look better? I feel like a snail has ran across it." Patrick asks monotonously, trying not to move his face so much.

You both were wearing sheet masks that resemble cartoonish animals, managing to convince him to do some self care together to rewind on a Sunday evening.

"Wait, don't move." You pull your phone out and take a photo of him.

He simply stares up at you from the desk chair.

"Oh Jesus." You say, laughing manically as you look back at the photo. Your facemask starts coming off, deciding to discard it entirely.

"What? Do I not look beautiful like you promised?" Patrick asks, feigning being upset. He also takes off his mask, throwing it away.

"You look just fine, now hold on."You exit your room and grab a face towel from the bathroom, dabbing the excess moisturizer before returning to your room and handing it over to him. "I also have a gua sha I'm gonna use on your face, is that okay?" You ask.

He furrows his brows at you, dabbing his own face now. "A what now?" He says, utterly confused by the item he's never heard of before.

You retrieve your gua sha from your desk drawer. "It's to de-puff your face and make sure you have good circulation. I'll be gentle, I promise." You say in a taunting manner, grabbing ahold of his chin to tilt his face up towards you.

He stares at you as you glide the rose quartz stone across his face slowly, focusing on his bone structure. "It feels cold." He whispers, staring into your eyes a little too intensely.

"It's supposed to feel good, Patrick." You tell him.

"It does." He simply says, keeping eye contact with you. The both of you stare at each other for a moment as your movements cease.

You clear your throat, walking away to sit at your vanity and use the gua sha on yourself. "This is what a lot of women do every day, you know." you say matter-of-factly.

"Why? It makes no sense. These extra serums and shit, it's like witchcraft or something." He mumbles, his face flushed red. You assume you may have put too much pressure on his skin, not that he was flustered in any way. No, surely not. "All women are beautiful." He states, moving over to your bed.

"I know you think that, most of them can't escape your wrath." You say smugly, putting away your skincare.

"What? You jealous or something?" He says playfully, laying on his side with his arm holding up his head. "You had your chance."

"Oh how will I ever live?" You sigh dramatically. "Oh right, peacefully." You remark, getting up to join him on your bed.

Patrick sticks his tongue out at you in response.

"Very mature, Zweig." You say, leaning against the headboard as you grab the remote and turn on a streaming service.

"Have you seen the new Thor movie yet?" He asks, sitting up to lean his back against the wall.

"Nope, why you ask?" You say, putting on Glee.

He groans. "Glee? Seriously? You're just like my sister."

"It's fun! just watch a few episodes with me."

"I have no options, I know." He says in defeat. "But I was wondering if you wanted to see Thor on Friday." He asks.

You almost say yes, but realize very quickly that you were unavailable, because of a date. "I can't, sorry. I'm actually already going to the movies with someone else." You say, shrugging as you focus on the television.

The day after you and Patrick reconciled, a very attractive man you recognized from campus came into your work. He hung around for an hour, simply conversating with you before asking you out on a date later on in the week. His name was Seth.

"And who's more important than me?" He says, pointing to himself.

"If you must know, I have a date." You state, grabbing your diet coke off the coaster and taking a sip.

Patrick smirks, eyeing you closely. "Ooh, a date. With who?"

"Does it matter?" You quip. "It's just some guy."

"It can't be just some guy if you, the pickiest person of all time, said yes to him." Patrick states, poking your leg. "Just tell me! Maybe I know the guy."

You purse your lips before deciding to tell him. "His name is Aaron, he studies Art History at school."

"Hmm, doesn't ring a bell. Sounds like a total fucking nerd if you ask me." He mumbles, turning his head to face the television.

"Well good thing I didn't, Patrick." You say in annoyance.

"Why are you always so defensive? I'm just asking you a question." He whines, tilting his head back.

Sorry, I just didn't think you'd care so much." You say, repositioning yourself.

"I'm your friend, I think it's fair give a shit about you sometimes." He argues. "Especially if you're dating randos."

"He's not a rando, I met him at work. Not on the internet mom." You say sarcastically, causing Patrick to laugh in response.

"Still, he could be a weirdo and you just don't know it yet." He tries to explain, speaking mainly with his hands. "He could lead you to a vacant parking lot at midnight then kill you, or other evil things." He says.

"You're starting to sound like those podcasts you've been listening to. Fucking relax." You say firmly. "Nothing is gonna happen. He's taking me to see Gravity at the movies and that is all. Dinner too, I think. I don't know where because he's surprising me." You simply state.

"Gravity? I thought you had a fear of space." Patrick says quizzically, furrowing his brows.

"Well I tried suggesting that remake of Carrie, but he hates horror movies." You admit.

"But you love horror movies?" Patrick says rhetorically, scoffing. "He already sounds like a horrible match, maybe I'm just crazy though." He says, putting his hands up before clasping them together in his lap.

"If I didn't know you already, I'd say you're jealous." You mutter.

Patrick reaches over you, taking the remote and pausing the television. "I'm not." He says firmly. "I just don't want you to waste your time on someone not worthwhile and you're ignoring the fact."

"You're not gonna let this go, are you?" You snap, laughing out of annoyance. "It's just a fucking date, it's not like I'm gonna marry the guy. Christ Patrick." You exclaim, standing up from your bed.

Patrick sighs. "I know, I know." He says. "Calm down, you're taking my word too seriously!" He argues, staying on your bed.

"Just drop it, okay? I don't wanna talk about it anymore. Clearly it's a sensitive topic for some reason."

"It's not! God, no it's not." Patrick tries to reason. "I'm sorry, it's not that serious. I just care about you."

You glare at him, crossing your arms. "You mean it?"

"I mean it." He heavily accentuates. "I hope it goes well, for your sake." He says.

"Yeah, me too." You say, although now unsure of yourself. "Me too." You whisper to yourself.

-

It's Friday, November 29th. The cusp of the true holiday season, and the end of a drought for your romantic conquests.

The date was going great, incredible even. The two of you got along swell, and any worries you had about him has dissipated as the night went on. You and Aaron just had some Italian dinner at a restaurant a block away, and had just set foot into the movie theatre. It was small, but had its unique charm that has stood against time.

"You excited for the movie? It has great reviews so far." He grins, hand in hand with you.

"I'm not great with space stuff to be honest, but I'm stoked nonetheless." You admit, smiling shyly.

"Really?" Aaron's eyes widen. "You should've told me, we don't have to see it..." He says, halting the two of you in front of the snack counter.

"No, it's fine. It's not a bother." You say, smiling.

The two of you are now in the screening room, waiting patiently as advertisements cross over the screen. Aaron is already eating his popcorn, and you're scrolling aimlessly on your phone. You see a new Instagram post from Patrick, recognizing the photo had been taken by you.

pat_zweig 【┘】 4 hr

❤︎‬ 213 likes, 9 comments

pat_zweig: naughty or nice?

You laugh quietly to yourself, leaving a comment on his post.

loverg1rl: you're getting coal in your stocking. photo creds btw? hello

You put away your phone, turning it off as the movie begins. You can't help but redirect your thoughts over to Patrick, wondering if he was enjoying his evening. Maybe you'd be watching Thor: The Dark World with him, and enjoying it a lot more than the motion sickness you're about to endure due to the outer space set up.

You start thinking about how this date would go if it was with Patrick instead, finding yourself slowly imagining him instead of Aaron. You knew it was bad, horrible even. You couldn't help yourself, he's left such an impact on you since you moved to the big apple.

Patrick Zweig was something you could not have, no matter how much you wish you could. It was pointless, everything would end in flames if you tried. Why not? You'd ask yourself, but why? You also say.

You look over at Aaron, smiling when he makes eye contact with you. Without thinking, you lean in and kiss him. He kisses you back, and it feels wonderful. This is how it's supposed to be; no pain, just pleasure. You ignore the feeling that you're forcing yourself, you just aren't used to Aaron yet.

You'll learn to like someone else, even if they're not who you really want.

The movie ends. You find yourself outside with Aaron, the cold air engulfing the two of you.

"That was insane, maybe of my favorite movie of the year." Aaron says, smiling wildly.

"It was good, yeah." You say casually, checking your phone. Patrick texted you, his name saved as the one he put in your phone as.

Patrick the Almighty: how's the date? i'm at art's. chloe's here, we're watching glee. thinking of you

You smile fondly at your screen.

"How are you getting home tonight?" Aaron asks, taking your attention away from your phone.

"Oh, my cousin is picking me up." You say, putting your phone in your pocket.

"I see, the tennis star right?" He says, referring to your conversation from dinner.

"Yes, the tennis star." You laugh. "I'm sleeping over at her house, so." You add.

"That's very cute, I haven't had a sleepover with my cousins since I was a kid." Aaron says, looking off to the side for a moment before returning his gaze to you. "I can wait with you, if that's okay." He suggests.

"Sure, I'd like that a lot actually." You say, grinning madly.

"Do you mind if I smoke?" Aaron asks, pulling out a pack of what you presumed to be cigarettes.

"Go ahead, I smoke too." You say.

"Weed?" He asks, almost giddy to hear you say it.

"Oh, no... cigarettes." You say sheepishly.

"Oh!" He says, raising his brows. "These are joints, sorry." He says, referring to the pack in his hands. He takes one and sticks it in his mouth. "Is that alright still?"

"Yeah, course. I've had it a few times before, back in Canada." You say, zipping up your jacket as the cold breeze creeps under your blouse.

He nods, lighting up the joint. "Did you... Want some?" He asks, inhaling then exhaling the joint.

You stand in silence for a moment, debating. "Yeah, sure."

He hands the joint over, allowing you to take hold of it.

You bring it to your mouth and inhale, holding it like a cigarette. You exhale, coughing a few times but holding your composure. "Fuck. That shit bites." You wince, taking another hit before handing it back to him.

Aaron laughs, taking the joint back gingerly. A vehicle pulls up beside the two of you, Tashi revealed in the driver's seat as the window rolls down.

"Gotta go." You say, tilting your head towards the car. "I'll see you, yeah?" You grin, giving Aaron a wink as you open the passenger seat.

"Yeah, see you." He says, inhaling his joint and giving you a small wave before you close the door.

"Well well well," Tashi grins, driving away. "He's fucking hot." She says, tapping on the wheel in sync with the music.

"Oh, I know." You say, the joint taking over your senses. "I smoked weed with him." You say abruptly, giggling profusely.

"Are you high?" Tashi asks, gasping as a smirk grows on her face.

"Mmm, a little." You grin, pressing your cold hands to your warm cheeks.

"You must've had a good time then." She laughs, looking over at you quickly. "My mom has some news to tell us once we get to the house, so I hope you can keep it together."

"What?" You gasp, turning to face Tashi. "What is it? Tell me now!" Your urge, grabbing her arm.

"Hey, I'm driving!" She exclaims, swatting your arm away.

"Sorry, sorry!" You apologize, sitting back in your seat. "Is it to celebrate your exam results?" You ask, your stomach grumbling. "I'm hungry." You whisper.

Tashi laughs profusely, trying to hold it together for the rest of the ride. "Well, kind of. It's to celebrate us both." She says, her smile never leaving her face.

"Can we go to Mcdonalds? I want a happy meal." You say, rolling the window down.

"It's cold! Don't do that!" Tashi warns, rolling the window back up with her driver control.

"But I'm too hot!" You exasperate.

Tashi groans, turning off the heat in the car. "You're too high." She argues, turning into the closest Mcdonalds.

-

You enter the Duncan household with Tashi, managing to sober up a bit after your nugget meal and finishing off the bottle of water your cousin keeps in the car as always.

"Mom! We're here!" Tashi yells, leading you into the living room.

Diane and Mike were sitting on the couch, Diane with a book and Mike with amaretto on the rocks, his usual. The radio plays in the distance.

"Hello girls." Diane grins, putting her book down. "How was the date?" She asks you directly, catching you off guard.

"Oh, it was great, yeah." You say quietly, looking down at your hands.

"He's very nice to look at, and seems to be very nice mom. He's good friends with Emeline, from my ethics class." Tashi adds, sitting down in a nearby armchair. You quickly sit down as well.

"Has Tashi told you the big news yet?" Diane grins, clasping her hands together.

"Erm, no. No yet... What's going on?" You ask, giggling awkwardly.

"We are going... To Italy!" She exclaims, waiting for your reaction.

You gasp, covering your mouth with your hands. "No fucking way!" You exclaim, cheering with Tashi.

"We're going with Michelle and her family, we hadn't gone travelling together since we were in college so..." Diane adds, watching both of your faces falter slightly.

"Michelle? As in the Zweigs?" You ask, mouth slightly agape. You quickly pull out your phone to text back Patrick.

"Yes, that Michelle." Diane says, laughing. She notices the look on your faces. "That's fine, right? You're both good friends with Patrick I figured it was okay?" She says.

You: we're going to fucking italy????

He texts you back instantly.

Patrick the Almighty: my mom just called me about it. isn't this fucking awesome??

You forcibly smile towards Diane, still a bit too high to comprehend it. "No, it's great." You say through gritted teeth, exchanging worried glances with Tashi.

Great. Fucking awesome.

-

this took awhile sorry guys,,,,, ive been watching rivals and my mind is running with ideas. see you in the next one!