#parody story

[horrorsfromthemindofsebastian]

A High Heel Horror Story

Chapter 2: Reopening of Camp Crystal Lake

Read chapter 1 here

"Mom Mom guess what!" Minny cheers excitedly as she walks into the kitchen where her Mom was. Her Mom turns around "What is it you're so happy about?" She asks.

"Today I made some new friends," Minny replies, her Mom smiles "Thats great, I'm really happy for you, hopefully you make some more next semester, I bet you will anyways," she said.

Minny asks her Mom "When will Dad be home?" Her Mom replies "Not long now, in about an hour I think, he seems to be getting on well with his new job, like you are with school, how is your new school anyways?"

Minny thinks for a moment, before answering "Its alright, still not as good as my old school but the kids aren't mean and at least the toilets aren't dirty, I know thats not really something many other kids think about but I hate germs!"

Her Mom chuckles "You get that from your Father, I'm glad you're doing well there, but remember if anything is going on, if you're ever stressed out or are getting bullied, you can come talk to me,"

Minny scoffs "As if any bullying will happen, you know what grandad taught me," Her Mom rolls her eyes "Please don't go around punching people, Minny, you'll only get yourself into bigger trouble than what you should do, go tell me, your dad or one of your teachers about it,"

"Yeah yeah, I know I was just joking," Minny laughs, she then leaves the kitchen and walks up to her room, it wasn't exactly complete as not everything from the moving van had arrived yet, it was cozy enough for now.

She sat on her bed and thought to herself for a moment, she then remembered that Violet had given her her phone number, she also remembers Violet had told her about something she and the others were going to do over the holidays.

She took the paper out her pocket and looked at it, before walking out her room and towards the living room where the phone was. She diles Violet's number and waits for her to answer.

V: "Hello, Moore residence, Violet speaking, who is this?"

M: "Its me Violet, Minny, you met me at school today,"

V: "Ohh hey Minny, thanks for remembering to call me,"

M: "Of course I did, so you said you and the others were doing something over the holidays? What is it?"

V: "Yeah that, its a bit of a long story, so my Dad recently bought this abandoned summer camp a few hours away, Camp Crystal Lake its called, back in the 50s this kid drowned there so it shut down, then there was like... Some murders there apparently but my Dad says its a hoax so we don't need to worry. We're all gonna be staying there from the 20th to the 23rd before it opens next year,"

M: "Wait, so you're saying we're gonna be spending winter at a summer camp?"

V: "Yep, don't worry the cabins will be heated up, and we have plenty of board games and other activities to do, maybe you could ask your parents if you could come along?"

M: "That sounds kinda fun, I'll ask them when my dad gets home, what about those murders you were talking about though?"

V: "You don't need to worry, Minny, those are merely spooky campfire stories that too many people thought were true. According to the story the camp reopened after that kid drowned and some of the camp counsellors got murdered, but according to my Dad what really happened was a bear attack and no one was killed, just injured,"

M: "Oh okay, so what will we do about the bears?"

V: "Simple, we throw Antoine at them and run,"

M: "Thats so mean Violet!"

V: "Yeah, I don't think bears like french food. What we're really gonna do is nothing, remember bears hibernate during this time of year so we should be fine,"

M: "Oh yeah, I forgot, I feel a bit stupid now,"

V: "Its fine, sometimes I forget how to multiply and divide and I'm a senior so... Thats not really good,"

M: "Oh don't worry about it, Ms Brown says we're not gonna have a calculator in our pockets when we're in the 'real world' as she puts it, but we don't know what the future holds,"

V: "Yeah, plus math isn't the be all and end all of life, at least not the really hard math,"

M: "I agree, so I'm gonna wait for my Dad to get home so I can ask him and my Mom if I can come with you guys, before that though what do you recommend I bring?"

V: "Well its not gonna be like regular summer camp so I recommend bringing clothes that will keep you warm like sweaters and coats, some snacks, some board games or books to keep you entertained if you want, but we've already got some ready so you don't need to if you don't want to, hmmm... Let me think, what else... Oh yeah your toothbrush,"

M: "Thanks, I've got some old board games in a box somewhere, I haven't really played them in a while but I'll bring them,"

V: "Okay, oh, I've got to go Minny, my Mom needs me to help her with something, if your parents say yes call me again tomorrow, bye!"

M: "Bye!"

Minny hung up the phone, happy to hear she is invited to go on this trip with her new friends, though she did question those supposed murders Violet mentioned she looked on the bright side of things, it was probably were just a made up story by stupid teenagers when in reality it was a bear attack, not to mention the group wouldn't need to worry about bears this time because it was the winter and bears hibernate during this time.

Minny then heard the front door to her house open, her Dad must be home! Now she can ask both her parents if she could go to that camp or not.

Minny immediately rushed downstairs, seeing her Dad entering the kitchen where her Mom still was "Hey Dad!" She said cheerfully.

"Hiya kiddo," he said back to her. Minny's mom smiled at her Dad "Guess who made some new friends today?" Mom told him. Dad looked at Minny and gave her a proud look "See! I told you you'd make new friends eventually,"

"And that leads me to something," Minny explains "Violet, one of my new friends, invited me to go on this trip with the others, and we're gonna be staying at this camp for 3 days, from the 20th to the 23rd so right before Christmas, please can I go? Violet already told me all the things I need to bring, warm clothes, snacks, books, board games and my toothbrush!"

Her Mom and Dad looked at each other for a moment before her Mom said "A camp eh? But isn't it Winter?" She asks, Minny replies "Violet's Dad bought this old summer camp and he's letting us stay there, there'll be heating inside the cabins and we aren't going to be going outside much,"

"Okay... Will there be boys there?" Her Mom asks, Minny looks to the floor before answering "Yeah... But its not like any of them are interested in me, nor am I going to be interested in them! I've only known them for less than a day, plus one of them is already in a relationship.... And the others seem kinda homosexual," Minny whispered that last part under her breathe.

"Violet, we trust you not to fool around and wound back here pregnant, but please be careful, and at the very least if you are gonna be doing stuff, tell him to use a condom," her Dad recommends.

"Dad! I already said I don't plan to do that sort of crap!" Violet exclaims back, embarrassed. "I'm just saying! You're technically an adult now so I don't really care what you do with boys in your free time as long as you aren't coming home pregnant at such a young age!" Dad replies.

"Yeah yeah, I don't plan to. So does that mean I can go?" She asks.

Her parents look at each other one more time and they both nod "Yes, Minny, you can go, just make sure you don't leave it till the last minute for you to pack your stuff,"

Minny's face lights up and she nearly squealed "Thanks so much! I'll go get some stuff ready right away!"

Minny then ran off back upstairs and into her room, immediately zooming towards her closet to look for any warm clothes she could bring along with her.

"Hmmm..." She mumbles as she looks at her closet, she thinks to herself "So I'm only staying for 3 days, which means I'll need 4 outfits, one for the trip there, one for the 1st day, one for the 2nd day and one for the 3rd day, here's a nice sweater that'll keep me warm!"

She picks out a nice sweater, one she bought a couple of months before she moved from Brooklyn to New Jersey, the sweater had red and dark green stripes, Christmas themed which would be perfect, she places the sweater on her bed before looking for some pants.

She found a lovely pair of black joggers which would keep her warm, she places that next to the sweater. She continues looking through her closet and eventually picked all of her outfits for the trip and put them all in a bag.

Minny was a bit tired after this, and she figured she'd pick out all of her other stuff tomorrow, so she went downstairs to watch some MTV on the couch.

She began to feel a bit tired and soon enough she decided to "rest her eyes" while listening to the TV, but she just fell asleep. It was dark for a while until Minny opened her eyes again, it was blurry, her eyes moved up to see the TV was all static, she went to go reach the remote on her right but she felt she couldn't move her arms.

She tried to stand up but her legs couldn't move either, she tried to speak but her mouth wouldn't open and she made no sound. Her limbs felt like they were held in place by some invisible super glue, the only thing she could move was her eyes so she looked around, but the only thing in the range of her sight was the TV, the couch, the table and the few objects on the table.

It was freezing, it felt like she and the living room had been somehow transported into a meat freezer, in fact now she was starting to feel the "super glue" holding her in place was more like the sticky frozen ice holding her to the couch.

She was terrified and confused, nothing like this had ever happened before, she could barely remember her dreams when she slept and when she did they were never like this.

Suddenly she felt a large hand grab her shoulder from behind the couch, the hand was warm which contrasted against the extreme cold. The grip was tight to the point where it sort of hurt her, she wondered if it was one of her parents, it couldn't be her Mom because her hands weren't that big, and while it's possible it was her Dad, he'd never grab her or touch her in a way that could possibly hurt.

Does that mean someone broke into the house? Minny's eyes looked back trying to get a look at who was grabbing her, but they were too far behind her to see fully.

Suddenly she got the sense that their face was getting closer to her shoulder, she felt her heart freeze just like the rest of her body as the person spoke "You better not be like them, no one likes a sheep," it was said in a whispery yet screechy sort of voice and it echoed in the room, despite the fact that the living room never echoed.

Minny tried her best to move away, but her limbs were frozen in place and she couldn't yell out for help. Soon she felt the sensation of something sharp, smooth and cold on her neck, she didn't even need to look down to tell it was a knife.

She was struggling now, but only within her own mind to let her move away, her vision started to get blurrier and blurrier, until it all faded to black, she then started to feel herself fall forward and crash into something, her arms and legs frailed around and a terrified noise left her mouth.

She looked around now able to move again to find the TV was playing like normal and she could move now, the room was no longer ice cold, and most relieving of all, no one was there with her.

Until her Mom came running into the room with am extremely worried look on her face "What's wrong?!?" She yelled out as she entered, she must've heard Minny crash and scream.

"Uh... Mom! I'm sorry I just, I..." Minny stuttered as she stood up and looked, she saw she had crashed forwards into the table in front of the couch "I fell asleep had a scary dream,"

Her Mom sighs "Okay, but please don't wake up screaming your head off again, I thought something serious happened!"

Her Mom then left, leaving Minny to ponder about what just happened in her dream, she lay on the couch a bit shaken up, but soon she came to the conclusion that it was just that, a dream. People have weird and scary dreams all the time, she remembers a dream one of her friends back in Brooklyn had involving a guy with knives for hands.

Minny then turns off the TV and places the remote on the table, she gets up from the couch and walks upstairs back to her bedroom, she was quite tired and wanted to get some actual sleep, but hopefully this time she won't get anymore nightmares.

She put her pajamas on, a plain white shirt and some colourful cozy pants, and she crawls into her bed, making sure to face the wall, as a child one of her older cousins once told her that if you face the wall you won't get nightmares, she wasn't sure how well this worked but she decided to try it just in case.

She closes her eyes and again, everything fades to black, and thankfully for her she didn't have another nightmare, she woke up the next day fresh and feeling good, ready to pack up some more things for the trip to that Crystal Camp thingy, she already forgot the name of it.

[badolmen]

They don’t even attempt to assassinate US politicians anymore. You notice that? Not since the anthrax scare back for… who was it, Barack? And even that… pathetic. This new generation has no respect for an honest hitman. I’m not sure this new generation has any honest hitman - you see that shit with Boeing? Sloppy, fucking disgraceful - you kill the whistleblowers before they get halfway to a lawsuit. What kind of fucking amateur is doing faked suicides the night before testimony? Goddamn greenhorns. Back in my day someone tried to shoot Ronald Reagan in broad daylight. There used to be bomb threats to Congress. I took out a few union leaders in the utilities sector myself. Today’s generation? Won’t even threaten to throw a punch - not even over on that - what’s it now, ‘X’? They got no guts. None! And they don’t even have poor impulse control to boot! Too much of that - that panopticon anxiety bullshit. “Oh what if I get a called out post???” People used to send the president letters full of bioweapons. In the mail! Today’s generation? Not a chance. All because of woke.

[melia-201]

I found some doodles I drew back in S1. I’ll post some more later!

[rainbow-taishi]

Silly concept:

Imagine an isekai language learning app about a character who uses multilingual phrases as spells to fight off evil forces but got their abilities sealed so you as the player (as them) have to 're-learn' it by retracing your journey across different regions 😂

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Five foot something and he's royalty.

[sparrowlucero]

this is the iconic dinosaur horror jurassic park wishes it was

[yeah-thats-probably-it]

So did any of YOU guys know that someone wrote a reverse!AU Jeeves fanfic in 1953, and Wodehouse liked it?

[starkidsupremacy]

Starkid and Puppets: A Legacy

Now if you're like me, you're probably obsessed with starkids penchant for puppetry

And in light of recent news...

It's safe to say I've been screaming, crying, throwing up thinking about it alot

So lets take a journey through all their Puppets shall we!

We start where all good stories start AVPM. Who have the Dragon puppet

Next, MAMD has no puppet's

And AVPS has sorty and scarfy! (<3)

Now obviously... Starship, with an incredible amount of puppetry

Bug and buggette

Roach and some other backround Puppets (including mosquito's)

And (in my opinion) starkids most incredible puppet to date, Pincer!

Holy Musical B@tman has none

AVPSY does have a puppet! They have the basilisk puppet (technically scarfy and sorty again)

Twisted has two Puppets! The monkey

And the parrot

Neither Trail to Oregon or ANI have any Puppets unless you count Cornwallis

Firebringer has both trunkell

And snarl (with a size to rival pincer)

And you know what, let's count the duck

Tgwdlm has none

Black friday doesn't technically have any but I'm still going to put a picture of wiggly here because I just think you should look at him <3

And surprisingly, while nightmare time 1 has no puppets, nmt2 does!

The axe man

And the stupidly impressive (and rival for my fav) Otho

Lastly Nerdy Prudes Must Die, regrettably, has no puppets

That's a total of 20 different puppets (lmk if I miscounted starship). With an average of 1.3 puppets per musical/project!

Sorry this is so long lol

[cicadako]

Wow the new slay the princess update sure looks weird!

[deepdreamnights]

Muphit, Felted Shambler

Creatures of strange forms linger in the soft spots where the Shadowfell and the Feywild both spill into the material plane at once. These places are like overripe fruit, sweet and aromatic yet lingering on the precipice of decay. Some dark entity may have hoped these locales would disgorge lethal abominations upon the world. They were half right. The two forces didn't merge, they cancelled each other out. The residue of this reaction did form living creatures, all seemingly powerful yet ultimately ineffective. They were, in essence, magic and nature's cruelest and most poorly-workshopped joke. The Muphits.

The Felted Shambler is one such creature. It is a vaguely frog-shaped humanoid, standing approximately 3 feet tall. Its outer skin is a felt-like mass of packed fibers that hold moisture and resist fire. Triangular growths of this material sprout from its neck and various patches on the limbs. They can be green, blue, red, or purple.

Born of the merging of the wild spirit of buffoonery and the essence of assassination, the Felted Shambler perceives all humanoids as its contracted targets, both in terms of entertainment and extralegal assassination.

As such, so long as it is observed the Felted Shambler is compelled to act out comedic sketches, songs and dance routines. It will do so with the assistance of other muphits if they are available.

The moment the shambler is no longer being watched by a sapient humanoid being, it immediately lunges for the nearest person with intent to strangle. If it falls into a person's field of view while lunging it will immediately snap back into comedic behavior. If it continues to be unseen, it will grasp its target's neck and begin to choke.

At this point, observing the creature will not deter it from using its unnatural strength. Fortunately, the felt shambler's strength is only unnatural in that it exists at all. Otherwise, its grip strength is exactly what is expected from damp living felt: 1/16th that of a human infant.

This will continue, with the creature making increasingly louder and more frustrated grunts of effort, until it tuckers itself out (usually 1-2 minutes) or the 'victim' makes eye contact for 2-3 seconds. In either case the shambler becomes visibly uncomfortable and retreats while doing improv.

Quartermaster's Guide to the Creatures of Xarthana, pg 77

prompt under the fold'

The image(s) above in this post were made using an autogenerated prompt and/or have not been modified/iterated extensively. As such, they do not meet the minimum expression threshold, and are in the public domain. Prompt under the fold.

Image is PD, text tisn't:

Prompt: Kermit the Frog in Stranger Things

[horrorsfromthemindofsebastian]

Chapter one of my story "A High Heel Horror Story" is complete... But!

Here are some disclaimers for before you read it:

It is a parody of 70's, 80's and 90's slasher films, so of course there is going to be a lot of violence, gore, death, sex and references to such things, if you don't like that type of stuff don't read

This is a comedy parody story, the silliness and comedy of the story builds up over time, so the further you are into the story, the more ridiculous it will get, the first few chapters are quite normal but keep reading if you want a fun silly time

There will be a lot of tropes in this story, but thats because its a parody (duh) but I do try to be original in a lot of parts

[swingingthehatchetnow]

A Very Boop Musical

Me and my Boop

A Very Boop Sequel

Boopship

Holy Musical Boopman

A Very Boop Senior Year

Boopted: The Untold Story of a Royal Boop

Boopi: A Parody

The Trail to Boop!

Boopbringer

The Guy Who Didn’t Like Boops

Boop Friday

VHS Boop carols

Boop Time

Boop Time 2

Nerdy Prudes Must Boop

And of course

Cinderella’s Boop

[adarkrainbow]

I just clicked what my favorite adaptation/version of Cinderella is. I mean, I kind of knew back then, but I didn't realize it because at the time Cinderella wasn't a story I was really interested about, and I hadn't gone into the entire Cinderella rabbit hole. But if you ask me what my favorite Cinderella retelling is, it is definitively the story of Emberella as presented by Terry Pratchett in his "Witches Abroad" novel.

Yes it is kind of a parody and deconstruction of the Cinderella story (and a quite excellent one at that), but it also works very well as its own fairytale - plus it literaly predicted/foresaw Disney's "The Princess and the Frog" 18 YEARS before the movie was released.... and while slapping so hard the face of the Disney company.

Yeah, Emberella is my favorite version of Cinderella.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

you are so whimsical i qant to check out this mdzs (..??) because of your whimsical nature thank you sorry im very high and your art moved me emotionally

This is simultaneously the sweetest and funniest thing someone has sent me, thank you.