#outing myself as this anon lmao

[hellsite-hall-of-fame]

Wait, girl in red? Are you female??

no i’m a ✨mystery✨

….but actually yes lmaooo

[kentopedia]

hehe okay thank you to all my beloved friends + anons that have listened to me rant about the moving blogs situation <3 after much consideration i think im gonna stay here and do a complete overhaul of kentopedia and see how that goes ><

[theloveinc]

Shinsou had a crush on you since like, young kids days and never thought you noticed him, but that was good cause maybe you thought he was a weird kid, so once he beefed up and finally got the confidence to talk to you it gets shut right tf back down when you're like "Of course i remember you!"

I don't know which part is worse............................ Shinso being so absorbed in his own supposed loser-hood in his youth that he essentially ignored you for 5-10 years while he was working out his self esteem issues ... or the fact that you not only DO remember him, berry well at that, but don't really think anything of it because you thought HE was kinda... a jerk for never being nice to you back.

(Cuz on one hand, you're so sweet, smiling at him when he approaches you, genuinely, just like you did back when you were both under ten and you'd smile at him from the other side of the park... but on the other hand, you don't hesitate to turn right back to your own friends after he barely manages to answer your "how have you been" question and you give him pity eyes like you still think he's a shy headass.

It's just... he doesn't want to fuck it up a second time and lose his momentum... but all the confidence he put into the moment deflated the second he realized you were even more beautiful and more kind than he remembered you and it got him tripping over his words)

ANYWAY then there's another 2-4 months of him trying to get your number just to be a fool over text before even managing to convince you he's worth a fucking damn LOL.

(And he is worth a damn, so much more than a damn because he's willing to give anything and everything up for you but... doesn't know how to say it in a way that wouldn't scare you off for good...

Not to mention he's so fucking bad at texting. Yes, his dry humor is funny as hell but he's not trying to be funny with you, he's trying to WOO you and so the whole thing is just him making excuses to reach out to you even tho texting first for him is like plucking ass hair.)

[lady-harrowhark]

Hello! I saw you mention that Pyrrha remembers pre-resurrection, and I totally missed that!! Do you have any theories as to why?

I have a few thoughts!

Just for context - because I didn't catch that on my first read either until I started going back through! - there are a few instances that seem to suggest Pyrrha remembers at least some of her life pre-Resurrection. Off the top of my head, I know there's one point where she refers to G1deon as G--, just like John does. Nona also says that Pyrrha calls her "Hairy Maclary", which is referring to a series of children's books by a New Zealand author. Here's a link to a picture and some info about Hairy Maclary... I can definitely understand why Pyrrha would call Nona that lol. This one's super interesting to me in that it's such a fantastic example of the way Tamsyn uses memes and references so skillfully! In the previous books, most of the references are fairly organic in that they're things that could conceivably be, you know, just things the characters say; the readers catch it (if they also know the reference! otherwise they're fairly unobtrusive) but the characters themselves aren't intentionally making a reference. This would be the things like "You can't just ask someone why they want to be a Lyctor" and "a hunger that only thumbs could satisfy," etc. The exception, though, is John. The "none Houses with left grief" particularly is SO fun from an exposition perspective (but if I start on that one I'll never stop), and then of course we have Commander Wake Me Up Inside. The implication here being that John remembers these specific things and is intentionally making those references within the context of the story. Pulling that same expository trick with Pyrrha sets them up as both remembering... at least to some degree. The hints that we get from Pyrrha are such that it's pretty unclear to what extent she remembers, leaving a lot of room for juicy speculation :)

I initially touched on it over on this post where I rambled about names, memory, and the Eightfold Word, but I'm copying over the Pyrrha-specific paragraph so that you don't have to dig for it:

When assisting with Harrow’s lobotomy, Ianthe tells her, “If you push your brain too hard, any surgery could simply heal over.” And in NtN, Pyrrha tells Palamedes, “You should be draining and replacing her fucking brain fluid... When Gideon and I designed that trial, I used to crack his skull and sieve it myself, just as a control variable... The only other people I put through that damn trial were Mercy and Cris, because only Cris didn’t mind being trepanned on the regular.” I don’t know exactly where the threshold is for pushing one’s brain too hard, but I suspect frequently draining and replacing one’s brain fluid is in that ballpark. Which is to say, it’s very possible that Mercy and Pyrrha (and potentially others) could have healed over from anything John had done to their brains.

Also, I don't know why this didn't occur to me as I was writing up that other post, but when Pyrrha's telling Palamedes about how dangerous their uhhhhh living arrangements are, and how they're risking brain damage... Pyrrha and G1deon were operating under somewhat similar circumstances for thousands of years. Cumulatively, it's possible that G1deon's brain was racking up damage that eventually eroded away whatever John had done. Another thought is that maybe the fact that G1deon died and Pyrrha didn't is at play here.

It could very well be less dramatic than that, though. We don't know much about how Lyctorhood impacts the brain, although to be completely fair, we also can't say for certain how a typical human brain would function after ten thousand years of runtime either. Our brains are constantly wiring new neural pathways and rewiring and revising old ones. After thousands of years, might we be reaching a Ship of Theseus situation with regard to the neural circuitry impacting pre-Res memories? Which is a fancy way of saying, "Maybe it wore off."

It could be all of the above, too. Assuming that Lyctor brains retain plasticity like we see in typical human brains (and I'm not letting myself think too hard on implications either way, because in sci-fi/fantasy make-believe land, neuroscience can be whatever you want it to be), we'd probably see that effect happening with the other Lyctors at roughly the same rate, but at least as far as we can tell (and that wording is intentional because I'm not taking anything off the table with this series), the others don't seem to remember. So that might be contributing, but not sufficient on its own. BUT perhaps ten thousand years of rewiring PLUS ten thousand years of cohabitation PLUS however long of being "trepanned on the regular" PLUS G1deon dying might override John's meddling.

We've still got so many open questions here regardless of what the specific mechanisms are. Like, I'd love to know when Pyrrha started to remember exactly. And did G1deon remember anything, then? It seems like he was Straight Up Not Having a Good Time so if he did remember, he might not have been relying on those memories much. Whatever's going on, I'm sure it's just as bonkers as the rest of the series!

[tangledinink]

Wait wait wait

You do witchcraft???

That's so cool! I had no idea there were other witches in the TMNT fandom!!!

What kind of witchcraft do you practice?? Personally, I deal mostly with divination, but I'd love to hear more about other people's crafts!

I do! ^^ Though admittedly my practice has been a little bit dormant as of late because I sort of fell out of habit after An Event which was a Bit Disruptive to My Life lol. But I guess I kind of dabble in a bit of everything? I dunno if I could pin myself down to just one kind of practice yet, I still sort of consider myself a Baby Witch. But I really like making little spelljars and casting candle spells and things of the like, and I've been trying to learn tarot for a while now! I also really like making and drawing sigils... For a while part of the joy for me has been just Learning New Things.

^ ft. gecko enclosure and tail lol. BoS and altar not pictured.

[blaithnne]

Here's how the Bellkeeper can still be Hilda's father:

Gay marriage.

ANDERS IS NOT FUCKING GOOD ENOUGH FOR HIM DO YOU HEAR ME

[wraithdance]

can i be 🎀 anon?

(you’re probably gonna figure out who this is fairly soon oops)

Is this Jules? Jules-iet? Jules-ie Andrews? Sunshine to my grumpy? Either way welcome to the harem snack time is at 12pm EST

[rainbowserenity]

Zack and Cloud, "You forgot to say the magic word." xD

Cloud was so used to no one paying attention to him that it threw him for a loop when someone suddenly did. 

The fact that this someone was a SOLDIER 1st class didn’t hurt. Or maybe it did. They’d known each other for months and he still had no idea how to act around Zack sometimes. 

Luckily, this never seemed to deter Zack. In fact, he was incredibly adaptable to Cloud’s…Cloud-isms. 

For the first few week’s they’d known each other, Cloud couldn’t help but flinch or stiffen up whenever Zack threw an arm around him or otherwise touched him. It wasn’t like he thought Zack would hurt him - completely the opposite - but a lonely childhood on top of a (mostly) friendless life in Shinra meant that he simply wasn’t used to friendly gestures like that. 

So when Zack eventually noticed the flinching and hesitance, he - without any preamble - would hover for a second before he grabbed Cloud in a half-hug or whatever. “Yeah?”

The fact that Zack actually paid enough attention to realize he had to give a little warning warmed Cloud’s heart in a way that he couldn’t quite describe.

And of course, his answer was always the same.

“Yeah.”

Of course it was different on the battlefield if they needed to push each other out of the way or something, but when they were just hanging out, the permission was always asked and granted.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

It happened when Cloud found out he hadn’t passed the SOLDIER exam and Zack held out his arms. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” As though he would disagree to a tight hug that made everything seem better, at least for a minute.

It continued happening even with how close they got. Holding hands. Manly cuddling as they watched a movie. Feeding him a piece of the dumbapple pie that Kunsel had dropped off (if the guy ever got out of SOLDIER, he really needed to open a bakery). Every time, it was always the same.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

There was just one time Zack forgot to ask, during a late night when they had nowhere else to be next morning and vulnerability and anticipation hummed through them; a buzz that’d only gotten louder the more they were together.

Cloud’s heart pounded wildly as Zack moved closer, their breaths hitching at the same moment. He froze a little, but then smiled a bit at Zack’s wide-eyed mako gaze. 

“You forgot to say the magic word.”

There was a pause before Zack couldn’t help but laugh. The smile still sat on his lips as he moved closer to Cloud, just a hair away. “Yeah?”

Cloud just breathed out one word, the only response he ever wanted to give to this man, before their lips finally met.

“Yeah.”

[httpiastri]

Ollie to haas confirmed?? 🤯

......i will not be saying or believing anything until i get it from a real good source

[concreteburialplot]

Hey! hope you're having a good day:) was just wondering if you have any song recommendations from chase atlantic for someone who's never listened to them before?

oh i love this 😭 i love giving music recommendations especially about a band i love so much💕

i do have to warn you that chase is not rock or metalcore in any capacity so if you’re expecting that, it’s definitely not that lol

but these are some of my recs!

Vibes is one off my favorite songs of all time & has been since 2015💘 it’s exactly what the title suggests, a vibe

honorable mentions;

cassie, swim, call me back, idontlikedarkness, triggered & ozone💞

thank you for the ask anon 🥰 i hope you like them!

enjoy some lovely gifs of my boy Kras💕 (+mitchel lol)

[stabbyfoxandrew]

arsoneil!

WIP Wednesday (9/27)  | Arsonist Neil / Firefighter Andrew AU

Neil is about to go out for a bite when his pocket vibrates. He freezes solid at the sensation against his leg. His phone never rings. He… He doesn’t have any friends and his mother is long dead. Who in the world would possibly text this number? 

It must be spam. Or a telemarketer. Right? Neil nods. Yeah. It has to be. That or Agent Browning needing some sort of information that Neil’s already spoon fed him four fucking times— he hates that dick. Neil rolls his eyes, then pulls his phone out and flips it open to find something totally unexpected. A message from a number he doesn’t recognize.

??? Why do you do it? — Mr. Firefighter

Neil stares at the message for a good minute. What the hell? Oh fuck. The fire people are messaging him?! Neil pushes back the curtain and looks out into the motel parking lot. It’s basically deserted, as usual. Neil hasn’t seen anyone new in the two weeks he’s been in Columbia. Two weeks… Has it been that long already?

Neil counts the days up on his fingers. It has. Shit. He should’ve gone by now. He should’ve left after that ghost of a restaurant called his name, asked him to burn it down. It really was asking for it, Neil recalls. A couple of its windows were busted out and the sign was so faded he couldn’t make out the words. He shakes his head. He’s got to go. He…

Wait. There isn’t anyone outside waiting to arrest him. How odd.

Neil looks at the message again and considers the question. Then, with slightly clumsy fingers he types a response.

<- previous | first | next->

[ccuriousmischieff]

could you please sit your pretty kitty on my face?

[hood-ex]

Why are you called hood-ex? Also love your fics<3

Thank you! Appreciate you reading them 💛.

I couldn't think of a Dick-related name when I first started this blog, so I took "hood" from Red Hood and then "ex" is a variation of X from Red X's name. Stuck them together because I thought it sounded cool at the time.

[dandyshucks]

logging in solely over here for a little while methinks, bc goodness gracious i stepped into some shit on my main account 😭 i an going to let my avoidance win just this once bc I don't want to have more anxiety to deal with on top of the usual stuff fjdkdl, i can avoid that anxiety by not logging into my main account for a while... this may backfire on me if the anxiety festers instead of fades though LOL

[dyed-red]

there was a post on my dash a few days ago about an interview with jensen about the prequel. he talks about casting, and about how the actor they hired for john had both sam (1) and dean (1) in him, and the actress they hired for mary had dean (2) energy (that none of the other actresses were serving, apparently). and the post rightfully pointed out that dean himself is there (3). so three deans to one sam, they noticed.

(edit: here is the link for anyone interested)

-

and looking at the reviews about how bland the pilot is, i can’t help but think that’s part of why? 

the thing that is magic about supernatural is the gravitational push and pull between sam and dean and the forces that are so much bigger than them.

you could have that in the prequel. the gravitational push and pull between john and mary and the forces that are so much bigger than them. 

it’s literally the canon backstory! 

the first time they met, they bumped into each other and (presumably on trained instincts) mary laid john on his ass then apologized, and he was smitten. but he was only smitten because of cupid’s arrow. the cupid we meet in canon tells sam and dean that their parents weren’t a good match, that they didn’t (wouldn’t?) get along, and that their relationship was ordained and the love was manufactured.

so you have the gravity, right there. the push and the pull. the fighting and the mismatch despite the passion and the love they literally cannot help but feel. and it lends itself so well to telling an unhinged story where two people meet and fall in some kind of love at first sight and are weird about each other! 

(in the way that sam and dean are weird about each other. breaking in in the middle of the night and fighting your brother is weird! disappearing out the door with someone you haven’t seen in two years while lying to your partner about why is weird! it’s all unhinged and so it compels the audience!)

to make that work on screen, you need to set up opposing dynamics so you get the push and pull, and you need chemistry. like, a lot of chemistry. the other magic of spn is the insane off the charts on screen chemistry that J2 have. lightning in a bottle, right?

the thing that made me ultimately decide not to watch the prequel was mary’s casting and character styling. despite being one of the few people actually excited about the story conceit (i love john and mary as characters!! i’m genuinely interested to see how the lying and hunting and vietnam trauma and the personality clash all played out!!), as soon as i saw the first promotional photos, the tentative hope i’d been harbouring for the show died a quiet death.

not only did this version not look much like either of the other two marys we had met in terms of face and height, but she had thick eyeliner and straight hair and a black leather jacket and a hard look and scowl. none of that jives at all with the mary we know and not just because she was sanctified in the memory of winchester men. we met young mary and she was dressed in bright tones with bright eyes! she was full of smiles (and lies), full of dreams for her own future, with bouncy curly hair and emotional frustrations and vulnerabilities. 

she was bringing sam, not dean. 

mary campbell is a rebel. she is like both her sons in different ways, much the same as john. there are parallels on both sides and i think it’s fruitless to say who is paralleled more to whom in the (main) show, who has more of who’s personality. but in that arc, in her youth, mary campbell wanting to leave the hunting life and have a civilian life with her partner john winchester was absolutely a parallel to sam’s similar yearning for freedom, for safety and simplicity. 

so we know already -- mary’s rebellion looks like sam’s rebellion. it’s not the devil may care attitude of dean, it’s a more serious and anxious rebellion against her upbringing. she’s tense but soft. easily annoyed but not sarcastic, possibly too earnest (in itself a perfect lie, something that makes her interesting because she’s anything but honest with john). doe-eyed so that when she drops you on your ass, you’re shocked. this small woman with her sweet smile is kicking your ass? what in the - ? 

casting a mary that is bringing forward features of dean, styling her in such a way as to look harsh and ‘badass’ instead of downright preppy, giving her that look and attitude and all of it? misses the point. 

there is no dean without sam. or at least no story about dean worth watching. because there is no gravitational push-pull between dean and ... dean. meaning that if both the prequel leads are bringing dean’s energy to their role, there is no chemistry. 

electricity isn’t formed without opposing charged ions. there’s no lightning in a bottle when everything is the same.

(there is no sense of pull between them to prompt a push. and when it comes time to write the push in anyway, without the pull? it will feel discordant and unconvincing to the audience’s eye. it will rankle.)

this issue sits as central, to me, even before any retconning of the original story. before the complete lack of 1970s vibe, and before what i’ve seen about them possibly(idk???) getting mary’s age wrong, and what i’ve heard about them making john bumbling or boring despite being a literal marine (who are...extreme) who quite literally just came back from vietnam, likely traumatized and intense. before the fact that they literally copy+pasted the plot of spn to the prequel with mary’s dad going missing. 

all of these features, alongside the casting issues, the styling issues, all of it right down to the original prequelgate itself, speak to the same fundamental issue - 

the prequel is missing heart. 

the lack of sam (not even in presence so much as in essence) functions like a hole in the heart of the show from which it is bleeding inward. the lack of love letter to time era, to the stylings and setting reads like a lack of love to the story itself. the lack of care put in to re-introducing us to the version of mary that we knew, those changes to her style and personality and story, read like an insult to those of us who loved her already, as if she was not worthy of a place in the heart of the creators as she already was.

i wanted to love this show. desperately, i really did. the day it leaked, before i’d heard about the rest of the ensuing prequelgate nonsense, i wrote a post in defense of the concept (since deleted). i wanted so badly to love it. i can’t. because i feel like the people creating it don’t love it. 

many will take this as a critique of jensen ackles and to some extent, it is, but mostly just a critique of trying to create a new show half-cocked while splitting his time acting on a handful of other projects instead of dedicating himself to the time and energy this show needed in order to be a success. i have no idea what his vision was for this story, and i’m not convinced he had a core vision. 

(for whatever else you might critique about kripke’s era of spn, it had a vision and it knew what it was. that vision was central to its resonance.)

more than that though, it’s a critique of all the producers and creators involved who thought that they could build off of what we already loved while gutting the core pieces we loved in the first place, while replacing these elements with their own versions instead, versions seemingly uninterested in the emotional foundations on which they were building. 

i can’t help but feel they were arrogant enough to think that making us love it would be as simple as checking boxes on a list and slapping a shine over it, thinking we’d be satisfied with the empty shell they deigned to put together. that they didn’t need to push each other, challenge the story, question the character favoritism or biases the team members were bringing to the table.

it’s the dean story with dean producers and writers and no one thought to question if they needed more balance? if the story needed more heart? if john was intense enough, if mary was sweet enough, if the characters had dimensions? 

was it ignorance? arrogance? were they all too up their own asses that they dismissed legitimate concerns as fandom wank because of prequelgate and fandom bullshit until it was too late? 

i’m sorry, that got more charged than i intended. bottom line, this isn’t a love letter to supernatural or its fans. love takes effort and dedication and care and heart. i’m not convinced the prequel has any.

[todayisafridaynight]

This is based off a text post going around a while back- but for the stream you should make a lil 2D drawing to represent you, and every time you hit Ctrl+Z it cringes/yells

i got two settings it's cringing and yelling ☠️☠️☠️