#other than when he’s throwing his father’s death in wwx’s face

[mxtxfanatic]

The thing about Jiang Cheng is that he’s not any different from the type of person who will claim that his parents divorcing during his childhood ruined his life while neglecting to mention that the reason for the divorce was because one of his parents was abusive. Was it wrong for him to want his parents to get along as a child? No. Was it wrong for a young Jiang Cheng to not view his mother as a terrible person? No. But 30+ year-old Jiang Cheng, guardian of a small child, himself, has not only failed to realize his mother was an abusive partner and parent, he has internalized her parenting skills and worldview as admirable, completing throwing his father’s teachings and the legacy of the clan whose name he bears to the wayside. That’s not sympathetic!

[angstymdzsthoughts]

The old Jiang sect leader, JFM's father, rather liked prostitutes. It's the main reason JFM doesn't have a whole flock of siblings and half-siblings running around Lotus Pier (and seriously, as a Chinese person, I'm genuinely amazed at the lack of concubines with all the unhappy marriages in MDZS).

CSSR is the only half-sibling JFM is ever able to track down. Oh, sure, he had a brief, slight crush on her during his stint in CR, then they both worked out her paternity (her mother was - a kept woman, on retainer, so to speak) and disgust rather killed any other thoughts. To make up for his mingled disgust and guilt at her ending up in the streets after her mother's death, rather than being taken to Lotus Pier like a child of Sect Leader Jiang should have been, JFM ends up doting on her, in a strange sort of way - like an older brother should, he thinks.

They both swear themselves to secrecy on CSSR's true lineage. The mix of stigma at being the daughter of a prostitute (rather than an anonymous street child) and inevitable dragging into the power games of the high and mighty that would come with revealing CSSR's parentage is not something either of them want.

Yeah well, this comes off VERY differently to the outside world. JFM buying CSSR meals, whatever stupid shit caught her eye at the market, defending her against the other disciples (not that she needs it), and going along with her antics reads - very strangely - in a society with extremely strict separation of men and women, and without the context of knowing they're half-siblings.

JFM ignores this and happily sees her marry WCZ. All is right in the world when little Wei Ying (did she seriously name her son Baby Wei? what did he expect out of his goblin sister, honestly) is born, and when he hears word of their deaths - he's his jiufu. Since WCZ doesn't have family that he knows of, it's JFM's job to take in Wei Ying. He can't have him call him jiufu, as is proper - the more generic shushu is the closest he can get - but at least his nephew is where he should be, under his care.

Unfortunately, this again reads somewhat strangely with the rumours of his love of CSSR - rumours which he never fucking bothered to refute, rumours which are coming to bite him in the ass now. And he can't say anything, can't say the five words 她是我的妹妹/she is my (little) sister that would shut the fucking ridiculous gossip up. And from his own wife, no less.

For something like a decade, he gets to hear endless rumours of him sleeping with - though he is the only one alive who knows it - his own half-sister and siring his nephew on her, repeated by everyone, including his wife throwing those accusations in his face. And he - he can't say anything, because he and CSSR swore themselves to secrecy to protect her. Even if the accusations hurt her son, even if it hurts him. The oath taken to protect her has now turned on him and her son.

But it would still probably be less painful than exposing the truth and then bringing WWX into the mess. As JFM's blood nephew, he would have far higher expectations of him, a harder time escaping the politics of the main sect families than if he was just the son of a favoured servant - politics he is utterly unsuited for, that will suck his joyful soul dry and eat him alive. And damn it, JFM will at least spare his nephew that, if he can.

JFM grits his teeth around the truth, and calls for a servant to bring some wine to his study. It's been a long day of hearing his wife scream at him about supposedly fucking his own sister.

You ever just wanna beat JFM over the head and scream Communication! Is! Key! To! A! Healthy! Relationship!

[grewlikefancyflowers]

‘Intrusion’ extra, what it says about Jiang Cheng’s role in MDZS, and how Wei Wuxian looks back on his past with the Jiangs

I said back in like June that I’d write meta on this and then put it off for a few months, oops! Here we are, finally!

First things first, both the ‘Intrusion’ and ‘Iron Hook’ extras are not just silly romps featuring married wangxian and fanservice, as some people seem to believe?? I’d say both of them clear up pretty neatly, for those that are still confused, points of contention in the fandom - such as Wei Wuxian’s heroism, and Jiang Cheng’s role as an antagonist. Specifically, if his actions were justified or sympathetic, and if he was punished unfairly by the narrative.

The first and most obvious statement made in ‘Intrusion’ is the parallel between the story of Young Master Qin (YMQ), and JC and WWX’s youths. I’ll summarise quickly the relationship between YMQ and the fierce corpse that has been bothering him.

They grew up together in YMQ’s grandmother’s house, since they were a similar age they played together

The fierce corpse (FC) was a servant in YMQ’s grandmother’s household

The grandmother took a liking to FC, and he was in some ways treated less like a servant, and more like a member of their clan, and was allowed to attend school with the other boys

YMQ specifically notes that his grandmother used to praise FC a lot

YMQ describes a story at the school in which someone answered a question, and FC incorrectly claimed he answered wrongly. When FC pushed the matter, the other students became annoyed and drove him out of the class

It is very heavily implied (to the point where ‘implied’ isn’t really the right word) that ‘someone’ was YMQ, that he had actually answered the question wrongly, and that he felt shown up by someone he felt should be below him proving so, and that he led the other boys in driving FC away

FC left the school and didn’t attend again

I probably don’t need to lay out where the similarities are…?

In response to YMQ’s story, Wei Wuxian (rhetorically) says this - ‘“Regarding the solution to that problem, in the end, who was right and who was wrong?”’

Aside from just exposing the kind of person YMQ is, in reference to a story wherein ‘FC’ is clearly a stand in for WWX, and YMQ for JC, MXTX’s decision to highlight specifically that it was FC that had the right solution to the problem is not insignificant. Nor how she specifies that he was the instigator of FC’s expulsion, while hiding behind the mob mentality of the other students.

Another interesting detail is that YMQ deliberately obscures the truth throughout the chapter, because despite his refusal to acknowledge it, possibly even to himself, he knows that between him and FC he is the one in the wrong. Similarly, JC obscures the truth about WWX, to the wider cultivation world during the period of WWX’s ‘downfall,’ (Ch.73) but also, more importantly, to JL after WWX’s death. JL believes that WWX ordered WN to kill both JZX and JYL (Ch.42). Of course, if JC did not have a guilty conscience, he would not feel it necessary to lie about these things. Or rather, convince himself that they are true, as he still blames WWX for the deaths of his parents’ and JYL and the end of the story (Ch.102).

YMQ’s attitude about servants is bad enough that it upsets Sizhui quite a lot, and shortly after their interaction with him, we have this exchange between LSZ and Wangxian.

‘Lan SiZhui thought about it, “I do not know either.” He responded with honesty, “He never did anything truly evil, but perhaps I find it difficult to deal with people of such character. I do not particularly like the tone with which he mentioned the word ‘servant’…”

He paused at this point. Wei WuXian was oblivious to it, “Typical, typical. Most of the people in this world looks down upon servants. Servants sometimes even look down upon themselves… Why are you two looking at me like that?”

Halfway through, he interrupted, not knowing whether to laugh or frown, “Stop—is there a misunderstanding here? How could I compare? Lotus Pier isn’t the usual household, after all. I’ve beaten Jiang Cheng up way more times than he’s ever beaten me!”

Lan WangJi didn’t say anything, but instead gave him a silent hug. Wei WuXian couldn’t help but smiled. He hugged back, stroking Lan WangJi’s back a couple of times. Lan SiZhui coughed. Seeing how confident Wei WuXian looked, not at all sensitive to the word ‘servant’, he was finally at ease.’

There’s a lot going on here...

Firstly, WWX definitely does not think badly of himself because his father was a servant, because WWX doesn’t think badly of servants. It is also true that Lotus Pier wasn’t so strict with hierarchy as other sects (Ch.51, Ch.71), and that WWX and JC sometimes playfully fought on equal terms in their youths. But WWX was also very clearly treated badly in the Jiang household due to his status, notably by YZY (Ch.51, Ch.56, Ch.57, Lotus Seed Pod extra), JC does also repeatedly enact real physical violence against WWX, that he simply brushes off (Ch.56, Ch.59). You could argue that the example from Ch.59 is under extenuating circumstances and therefore should not count, but the same excuse cannot apply to Ch.56.

Knowing this, Lan Wangji’s response to this, to hug WWX, does not feel casual at all. Instead it comes across as if he is offering comfort, which WWX accepts.

Finally, this exchange finishes with ‘Seeing how confident Wei WuXian looked, not at all sensitive to the word ‘servant’, he [LSZ] was finally at ease.’ To me, this seems to suggest that the entire purpose of this was not at all reader directed exposition about how good and equal the Jiang household was, but rather a WWX-typical veneer meant to appease LSZ’s concerns (taking a moment to quietly fangirl about how good MXTX is at ‘show, don’t tell’). Also suggests that WWX is aware on some level that he was treated badly, and LWJ is too - presumably, it is something that they have spoken about.

Continuing with the story of YMQ and FC…

YMQ returns to his home village as an adult wearing a jade pendant that belonged to his now deceased grandmother

FC asks to borrow it, YMQ allows it, thinking FC is missing his grandmother

FC returns telling him he has lost the pendant, YMQ thinks he has actually sold it, and has him beaten, it is very heavily implied that he breaks his leg

In the present, YMQ admits that he doesn’t actually think FC would have gone so far as to sell something of his grandmother’s

This is reflective of JC’s attitude towards WWX throughout his life, with regards to how he frequently comes to the worst conclusions about him, without having any real evidence, and lashes out at him for it. I spoke about this a bit before here. Most notable example is probably during their conversation in the demon-slaughtering cave wherein they discuss WWX’s defection, and JC decides that WWX is acting carelessly and playing the hero, though admits himself that WWX is following the Jiang Sect’s teachings, then declares WWX an enemy of the cultivation world behind his back.

The ambiguity of FC’s death, and YMQ’s role in it discussed in part 3 of the extra is referencing WWX’s own death, and JC’s role in it. In the end the conclusion is that whether or not YMQ was responsible, FC did not hold him to it.

In the end, FC is content to simply throw some fruit, and punch YMQ in the face in vengeance for his death, and even goes out of his way to avoid hurting LSZ when he is fighting him. He returns the jade pendant, that he really did lose and not steal, and goes back to resting peacefully.

WWX, LWJ, and LSZ’s views on YMQ’s fate are as follows

‘Lan WangJi gently tugged Lil’ Apple’s rein, his voice calm, “He was fortunate.”

Wei WuXian agreed, “Indeed. Young Master Qin has got quite the luck.”

After some time, Lan SiZhui finally couldn’t hold his words back any longer. Sincerely, he spoke, “But I still feel that only one punch might be a bit insufficient…”’

JC didn’t even get a punch to the face. I’d say he got off very lightly indeed.

[poorlittleyaoyao]

That artwork awakened the Yaoli feelings that have lain dormant since last spring, and I started writing out this whole summary of the two canon-divergence scenarios for them that live in my head (one which fixes things, one which makes many things worse), but that was taking too long. So instead! Here is why I find them compelling!

One of the only times they interact (sort of) in CQL canon is the godawful dinner party after Nightless City, where JGS tries to pressure them back into a marriage alliance and WWX comes in and makes it WORSE by insisting JYL speak her mind. JYL respectfully declines the offer, but she looks PROFOUNDLY uncomfortable the entire time. And then! Once she’s done speaking, JGY stands up, acknowledges and praises JYL’s response in a way that prevents JGS from trying to push back, and skillfully changes the subjects. It’s the most helpful thing anyone does for JYL that entire night! It’s the only time someone doesn’t speak for her or put her on the spot! GET YOU A MAN LIKE THAT, YANLI.

Both of them prioritize being polite and accommodating in their interactions with others... and both would be able to figure out when the other one is fronting. JYL would know that something was Off with JGY’s strained :) face, and JGY wouldn’t mistake (or willfully misinterpret) JYL’s silences and demure nods for enthusiasm.

They could be such good allies for each other within the rancid environment of Jinlintai! They’re both outsiders with limited freedoms; JYL is higher-ranking and in less physical danger than JGY, but JGY has more freedom of movement. They can protect each other!

(Without getting too in the weeds... JYL’s experiences growing up would make her sensitive to Madame Jin’s treatment of JGY, and JGY’s experiences growing up would make him sensitive to the threat JGS potentially poses to JYL.)

JGY has an established Type and that Type is “eldest daughter.”

JYL would probably not hold the dirty work JGY does for JGS against him? I mean, she wouldn’t be THRILLED, but her kid brother’s the Yiling Laozu, so her threshold for is “that was bad but he felt stuck so I’ll forgive it” is pretty high.

If they start having an affair while JZX is still alive, there is all KINDS of messy drama potential. Does this factor into JGY putting JZX into harm’s way (or, in CQL canon, straight-up having him killed)? Is the resemblance between Jin Ling and JGY more than a coincidence (esp. given novel canon’s implication that JGY strongly favors his mother)? HMMM!

If they have an arranged marriage after JZX’s death as JGS tries to maintain control over Lotus Pier, we have the potential for JGY shifting his loyalties to Lotus Pier as he and JYL develop feelings for each other and he becomes more enmeshed with her and Jiang Cheng. Can JGY do anything about his father without implicating himself (and likely taking the blame if it becomes his word against JGS’s)? No. Can Yunmeng Jiang challenge Lanling Jin militarily or financially? Also no. But could Great Sect Leader Jiang Wanyin, armed with a long list of receipts, turn public opinion against JGS? Especially with the support of Nie Mingjue, who doesn’t trust JGY as far as he can throw him but does trust his comrade in arms from the Sunshot Campaign and his jiejie who tirelessly healed Nie soldiers? HMMM!!!

[silverflame2724]

Accidental Martial God WWX

That was exacty what I meant actually but I do have a few more povs if you want.

LQRs reaction to a demonic cultivator ascending, JGS and JGY reaction to the Yin Tiger Tally moving completely out of reach, WQ pondering the true requirements for ascension given WWX doesn't have a golden core yet ascended, WWX musing on Godhood and on his new followers both the good and the more disturbing worshipers.

Maybe LWJ protects the Wen Remnants because WWX asked him to in a dream and after he succeeds (13 years later) he ascends and is finally reunited with WWX.

Lan Qiren did not know what to think. Wei Wuxian, his most troublesome student, a demonic cultivator, had ascended. He’d ascended. How was that even possible? Were the Heavens blind? Why would they allow someone like Wei Wuxian to ascend?

From what Lan Qiren had thought, only those who are righteous and followed the correct path in life like the Lan clan’s founder, Lan An, would be worthy of ascending.

Either the qualifications for ascension were lower than he thought or Lan Qiren had been horribly mistaken about Wei Wuxian’s personality and motivations for using demonic cultivation. That last thought made Lan Qiren feel very uncomfortable.

He’d always been harsh on the boy and disregarded him, even - he ashamedly admitted - punishing him harsher and more frequently than others.

He’d thought he was in the right because of how Wei Wuxian was but…..

But if he was wrong then Lan Qiren owed him an apology.

………………….

Jin Guangshan wanted to scream out in frustration seeing Wei Wuxian ascend. That brat had the Stygian Tiger Seal on him - according to his spies - and now that he ascended, the Seal went with him.

He had had so many plans on bribing Wei Wuxian to his side or killing him when he refused - as well as stealing the Seal - and then taking over the cultivation world, lording over it as he was always meant to be.

Now those plans are ruined. He sighed. Hopefully that bastard son of his can finally prove his usefulness and give him countermeasures or he might retract his favor from him.

……………………

Jin Guangyao’s first thought upon seeing Wei Wuxian ascend was: Oh shit. I have to go make up new plans to help Father.

He knew his father wanted Wei Wuxian and the Seal and didn’t really care how he obtained both or either, just as long as no one traced it back to him. He sighed. This was going to be a big headache. But at least the plans on putting his father as Chief Cultivator were going smoothly. He could only imagine what his father would do to him if even this failed.

..............................

Wen Qing had still been in Yiling, making plans to relocate her family, when the news that Wei Wuxian had ascended had reached her.

Her first reaction was, That’s impossible.

Because it was, right? Wen Qing should know. She cut out his core, after all. But to think he was still able to ascend while he was a demonic cultivator made her wonder what the requirements were for ascending. Perhaps it’s an honest heart? Self-sacrificing tendencies? Or is it a sacrifice of some sorts? She paused. What if.....it was a trial? To test a person’s will? What Wei Wuxian had suffered was.....horrible. Could it have all been just a test from the Heavens?

If that was so, the Heavens really are cru--- 

“A’ Jie, we have to go! Some Jin were spotted nearby!”

Wen Qing gritted her teeth. Members of the branch families of Qishan, regardless of whether they were innocent or not, were captured and subsequently tortured to death by the Jin and sometimes the Nie. Because her family was all in Yiling, they were safe.......but only for now. They had to hurry and escape.

Wen Qing sent a quick prayer to Wei Wuxian, hoping for her family’s safety, and tucked the rest of her belongings in her qiankun pouch, remembering to wrap her arms in bandages to hide the needles she might need to paralyze any Jin that came close.

....................................

Wei Wuxian’s first thought when he landed in the Heavens was, What the fuck.

Then he looked around and looked taken aback and wary at the unfamiliar faces around him. Where the fuck am I?

“Hello.” A rather stoic-faced man greeted.

“Hello.” Wei Wuxian parroted back. The person in front of him didn’t seem to be a threat so he felt a little tension loosen from his shoulders. “Um, Xiansheng? I’m afraid I don’t know where I am?”

“You have just ascended.” The man replied, throwing Wei Wuxian aback.

“Are you pulling my leg?” Wei Wuxian asked. “How is that even possible! I don’t even have---” He swallowed. I don’t even have a core.

“I do not lie. Come, we are wasting time. We must get you washed up and dressed for the induction ceremony.” Seeing Wei Wuxian still frozen, the man sighed, signalled for some people to pick Wei Wuxian up and dragged the struggling man to some quarters.

After absentmindedly washing, drying and changing himself, Wei Wuxian noticed some differences in his body. He wasn’t....cold or hurting anymore. And - he touched his back - he could feel his back! After having his muscles and nerves shredded by Zidian, he didn’t think he’d ever be able to sense touch on his back or even move without pain! But now he can!

He heard the urging of some people and grumbled.

“You will become a god of demonic cultivation.” Was the first thing he heard when he stepped out of the room.

Wei Wuxian choked. “Excuse me?!”

“I said what I said. Now then, if you would please concentrate, you should be able to hear the prayers of the people below.”

Wei Wuxian felt like everything was moving a little too fast for him, but nevertheless complied. Immediately after, a flood of prayers hit him at full force.

“Wei Wuxian!” That was Jiang Cheng! “….Have some fun up there.”

“A’ Xian, do be well. Shijie isn’t there to take care of you so do be well.” Wei Wuxian refused to cry.

“Wei-Xiong! I hope there’s someone up there to supply you with you know what *winks*”

How does someone even wink in their prayers? Wei Wuxian thought amusedly.

“Wei Ying.” That was Lan Zhan. “Wei Ying, I will—be well.”

Ah, Lan Zhan. Always concise even in your thoughts.

Wei Wuxian was a little teary. As much as he was glad to not be a part of the cultivation world considering all the rumors, he did regret leaving behind those that cared for him.

That thought was much more cemented upon hearing…….

“Ah, Lord Wei, the pinnacle of evil, the role model of all demonic cultivators!” Wei Wuxian’s eye twitched. “Please hear my plea for more power! I need it, I need it to destroy everyone who harmed me!”

“Wei Wuxian, I wish to gain power over resentful energy so that I may tear my enemies limb by limb!

“Give me money! You’re a god, aren’t you? Be useful for once and give me some gold!”

“Tch. If I’m going to pray for anything, then it’ll have to be the Seal. You’re a god, now, right? So you have no need for the Seal. Just give it up.”

No matter the good or bad, Wei Wuxian heard the wishes and prayers of the people down below and while some were innocent enough, there were those that wished for death, destruction, tools for torture, power, money, women…….you name it.

It made Wei Wuxian feel a little disgusted with humanity. He cut off his focus from the bad and focused on the prayer he received from his friends and family.

“Wei Wuxian, I heard you became a god.” It was Wen Qing. He hadn’t heard her voice in a long time. “I know this might seem shameless of me after all I did to you, but please. Please guarantee the safety of my family. We’re being hunted down and—”

Her prayer was abruptly cut off, before coming back in full force with notes of desperation. Her family had been captured and taken to Qiongqi Path! Wei Wuxian panicked. He didn’t know how to escape from this place and try to go help her.

The…..person who was watching over him evidently knew what he was thinking about and merely stated that gods cannot interfere with the mortal realm. So he was stuck.

But that didn’t mean he was out of options.

It took a few days, but he managed to wheedle out how to help: via dreams. He merely needed to get into the mind of one of his followers and tell them to help. Much like those prophetic dreams Wei Wuxian had read about as a kid.

So he buckled down, thinking of the best candidate to help him.

……………………………

Lan Wangji looked at the landscape around him and concluded that he was dreaming. Though, it was a little odd that he was aware that he was dreaming. Not that he hasn’t realized he was dreaming before - especially in those many fantasies he had of Wei Ying - but to be aware that this is a dream and to see nothing but a flat landscape was pretty out of the ordinary. 

Anyway, he digressed. What was going on?

“Uhh, Lan Zhan? Can you hear me?”

“W-Wei Ying?!” Lan Wangji couldn’t be blamed for stuttering. He wasn’t expecting this!

“Phew. Oh good, you can hear me. Anyway, Lan Zhan, I gotta be quick about this because I’m kinda sorta bending the rules here, but do you think you can go to Qiongqi Path and rescue Wen Qing and her family?”

“Okay.”

“Huh? Just like that? Not even going to ask me for a reason, er-gege?”

Lan Wangji’s ears flushed red at the address. “If Wei Ying wants to save them, you must have a good reason. That’s enough for me.”

“Ah, Hanguang-Jun.” The title was spoken fondly. “Always so good. I’ll tell you anyway. Wen Qing and her family sheltered Jiang Cheng and I after Lotus Pier fell and even brought back Jiang-shushu and Yu-furen’s bodies! That’s a debt I cannot repay.”

“I understand. I will help.”

He couldn’t see Wei Ying, but could practically feel the amusement from him.

“Wei Ying.”

“Yes?”

“Are......Are you well?”

“Of course I am. I’m actually feeling so much better than before.” Wei Ying grumbled, “I’m not even in pain anymore.”

“You were in pain?” Lan Wangji asked worriedly. “Wei Ying, why didn’t you say anything.”

“Lan Zhan, there was nothing you or anyone else could do to alleviate my pain. It doesn’t matter now. I’m okay.”

Lan Wangji was still worried and wanted to speak to him more, but---

“Ah! Looks like my time’s up!” Wei Ying exclaimed cheerfully as the dreamscape wavered. “See you, Lan Zhan!”

Lan Wangji nodded. “See you, Wei Ying.” I’ll catch up to you soon.

.

.

.

And 13 years later, Lan Wangji kept his promise.

___________________

I didn’t edit this so I’m hoping there’s not too many grammatical errors lol. 

[canary3d-obsessed]

Restless Rewatch: The Untamed Ep 17 part one

(Masterpost of all the rewatches) (Canary’s pinboard of original content)

Warning: Spoilers for All 50 Episodes!

Inaccessible

Wei Wuxian hides in a boat among the lotuses next to a pier in Lotus Pier, the second-most-literally-named home in the show, after The Burial Mounds. This pier has a railing that goes all the way around it, without any ladders or anything. Not to be ADA on main but this means if you can't Jedi jump, you're fucked.  

Hefeng Liquor

While Wei Wuxian waits and tries, not very successfully, to keep his shit together, he hears the guards talking about the local booze that they're going to drink at their murder victory party. We learn, in a desaturated flashback (that OP has done her best to resaturate), that this is lotus-infused wine invented by Wei Wuxian during happier days. 

He kicks the flashback off with his favorite activity, Unnecessarily Erotic Beverage Drinking. (gifset) I’ve slowed this gif down so we can all appreciate the unnecessariness. The way his hand caresses that leaf OMG

Hopefully he is not drinking lake water out of that leaf. Side note: How is it possible that Xiao Zhan doesn't have a drinking water endorsement deal? I had to resort to Zhu Yilong's brand of water for this gag. I figure if it's good enough to pour directly onto a lightning burn like they do in The Lost Tomb Reboot, it's good enough for a leaf hummer chastely drinking out of a leaf

(more behind the cut!)

In his memory, Jiang Cheng tells him to stop fucking around and come help with the basket of lotus pods. Wei Wuxian responds by grabbing one for himself and then sitting his ass down and not helping. Cause he’s a motherfucking P.I.M.P.

Emotional Rescue

Wen Ning arrives on the pier with Jiang Chang, to Wei Wuxian's extreme relief. Look how much emotion Xiao Zhan is able to convey even with half of his face hidden, my lord.

Wen Ning carries Jiang Cheng on his back, in an echo of other significant piggyback rides in Wei Wuxian's life.  

Wei Wuxian's relief is at war with his fear, seeing his brother in such bad shape. Remember, these are cultivators, who heal quickly and mostly don't get their asses beat this hard. The only time Wei Wuxian has been comatose was after the Xuanwu cave, and that was probably because of his prolonged contact with resentful energy/Yin iron.

Hibernating Zidian

Wen Ning gets ready for his first, but not his last, boat ride with an unconscious Yunmeng brother in it. He tells Wei Wuxian that Jiang Cheng is pretty fucked up but isn't dead.

Then he gives Zidian to him. Before we talk about Zidian, let's talk about BAMF Wen Ning.  Wen Ning is an awkward goofball. He’s also insanely competent at just about everything--wine-drugging, dude-smuggling, corpse retrieval, dog acupuncture, drug pushing. As well as shooting rocks out of the air and, later, beating zombie ass, and resisting mind control. . 

This is the foundation of their friendship; it’s not actually about Wei Wuxian being nice to the weird kid. He initially sought Wen Ning out for the same reason he sought out weird kid Lan Wangji--his martial skill. He accepts his weirdness and is protective of him because of his missing-spirit problem, but he did not befriend him out of altruism.

Wei Wuxian is so forgiving that he can smile fondly when looking at the weapon that whipped the shit out of him a couple of days ago.

Wei Wuxian puts Zidian down right next to Jiang Cheng's hand and...nothing happens. It doesn't recognize him or spark to life. This didn't seem meaningful when I watched it the first time, but rewatching...yikes. It KNOWS.

Wei Wuxian admits, with tears in his eyes, that there is nowhere safe for him to go with Jiang Cheng, and Wen Ning immediately offers care and shelter. Even though that is putting his own life at serious risk.

Life obligation is a common theme in CDramas. It’s often something a person chooses as a way of showing love. Guardian builds an eternal romance out of two people saving each other’s lives over and over.  But accepting the obligation is a choice (in fantasy dramas, if not in real life). Love and Redemption has a gloriously harsh sequence where a life is saved, and the save-ee cooly rejects the saver.

Every time Wen Ning saves Wei Wuxian, he cites that one time that Wei Wuxian saved him from the water demon. And Wei Wuxian cites this rescue right here when he throws everything away to save Wen Ning. Meanwhile, Jiang Cheng doesn't acknowledge any debt to Wen Ning at all, only--grudgingly--to Wen Qing. And people are ok with that.

Basically all this is to say that I think Wen Ning leans into this life debt because he loves Wei Wuxian, and Wei Wuxian leans into it because he loves him back. Non-romantically, I think...at least on Wei Wuxian’s part. YMMV.

They go to pick up Yanli from their Granny, telling her to go into hiding. She starts to cry, not knowing how she'll manage on her own. Wei Wuxian tells her that they will come back, as Wen Ning looks super unsure about that.

Of course Wei Wuxian can't know, at this point, whether they will come back. Wei Wuxian always wants to make everybody feel better, and sometimes you really can't make someone feel better except by lying. He compulsively says shit that he thinks people want to hear, almost as if he was beaten frequently and arbitrarily as a child.

Wen Ning is doing his best for the recreational boat ride industry, as he rows the Yunmeng trio through some amazingly beautiful scenery.

Core Melting Time

Meanwhile, back at Lotus Pier The Yunmeng Supervisory Office, Wen Chao is hung over, Wen Chao is angry, Yawn

For some reason, Wang Lingjiao has suddenly decided to talk to Wen Chao in the most cloying and annoying way possible. 

Also, the fact that she still addresses him as Gongzi when she is totally fucking him is kind of great. This is like those fics where Elizabeth Bennet calls Mr. Darcy "Mr. Darcy" even when they're married and hitting it. 

Wen Zhuliu demonstrates why he's called Core-Melting Hand, by punishing the wine guard. He's able to melt a guy's core by grabbing him by the throat, and also picks him up, Darth Vader style, for extra meltyness.

All that stuff I said last time about Wen Zhuliu feeling ambivalent about being a villian...yeah, he seems to have gotten that right out of his system. 

Chilling in Yiling

Wen Ning is doing his best for the recreational carriage ride industry.  Wei Wuxian, after presumably several hours in the cart, decides that now is a good time to get curious about where they are going. 

Here we start to see a new side of Wei Wuxian.  Before this he was carefree, other than specific worries about his friends. He confronted danger with lightness and humor, or with temporary fear, that he let go of once the danger passed. Now, after all the deaths and seeing Jiang Cheng so injured, he's twitchy, anxious, and angry.

Very, very angry.

When he realizes that Wen Ning has brought them to the Yiling supervisory office, he goes off, demanding to know whose home this was before the Wens took it and grabbing Wen Ning and shoving him into a decorative...decoration.  He thinks Wen Ning brought them here to harm them. 

I wouldn't have thought such a pretty dude could be so menacing, but holy crap.

The way he's confronting Wen Ning here is not his normal style. He's not trying to provoke a bigger fight like he usually does; he's not trying to create distance, the way Jiang Cheng does. He's very intimate, getting right in his face and maintaining eye contact. He trusted Wen Ning and feels personally betrayed.  

Shy little Wen Ning is remarkably calm when confronted like this. Wen Ning really isn’t afraid of anything, despite his general air of nervousness. (Full gifset of Angry WWX over here.) 

He calmly and kindly explains the situation. He doesn't appeal to Wei Wuxian's trust, saying "oh I would never;" he appeals to his logic, which gets through to him. 

Wen Qing comes out and the guards start banging on the door and Wei Wuxian flips out again, grabbing a sword and pointing it at Wen Qing as she decides what to do.  Wen Qing seems unruffled by Wei Wuxian's sword pointing, and we see her weighing up the situation.

She makes her decision, sending the guards away and deciding to help the fugitives, officially joining the Clear Conscience Club. She could probably get Wen Ning out of trouble by turning them in, but she opts to put personal loyalty and her belief in her own ideals ahead of her family's safety.

Wei Wuxian is not ok. He’s just not ok. He tries to act like it after they get settled in with Wen Qing, but he's not, and I think that plays into his next several choices. 

Next comes a whole sequence of Jiang Cheng being unconscious with pins in his head--ow--while Wei Wuxian twitchily tends to him. 

This sequence is kind of unfair to Jiang Yanli. What matters to the story here is Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian's relationship, so that’s the focus of these scenes. But really, there is no way Jiang Yanli would not be at Jiang Cheng's side unless she was literally unconscious herself. Let's assume Wen Qing stuck a needle in her to make her rest while she has a fever. Shippers should also feel free to assume that Wen Qing spent hours at her bedside, tenderly wiping her forehead and holding her hand as she recovered. In his sleep, while Wei Wuxian sits by his side, Jiang Cheng calls for his sister, mother, and father, but not for his brother. Ouch.  

Let's pause to appreciate Wei Wuxian's new outfit, which is the sort of getup most people in this society probably imagine Yiling Laozu wearing, rather than the low-key homespun stuff he actually spends his Yiling year in. This robe has fancy shoulders, shiny material, touches of Jiang purple, strange red hoody strings, and a fuckin' CAPE. He didn't bring any luggage with him from Lotus Pier, although he's still got his Yin Turtle Sword hidden in a bag of holding. So the most likely explanation is that Wen Ning hooked him up with this lewk. "Wei Wuxian is a nice person. He should have a magnificent cape."

Wen Wing and Wei Wuxian take a breather to stand on the porch and work out what their status is with each other, like a couple of fucking adults, which is amazing. Basically Wei Wuxian is ready to forget earlier Wen shenanigans, but is going to avenge Lotus Pier. 

Wen Qing isn't enthusiastic about that but doesn't argue, just asking, mostly rhetorically, if he plans to kill her too. He's uncomfortable considering that; the role of avenger isn't one that's comfortable for him, although he turns out to be extremely good at it. He does not, of course, plan to kill her too. In a few months, imprisoned in a Wen dungeon, she will be the only Wen left alive after Wei Wuxian 1.5(No-Gold Edition) and Chenqing come to visit.

Jiang Cheng finally wakes up, and the first thing he does is to test out his spiritual power by hitting Wei Wuxian as hard as he can. 

DUDE.

Look at Wei Wuxian's face, as he goes from happy, to shocked and hurt, to laughing it off. It's exactly like when Jiang Cheng shoved him in the Rock Lady temple. Has Wei Wuxian spent all of his years with Jiang Cheng going from affection, to hurt feelings, to pretending it's fine? God, I think he probably has.

This episode raises a question that will come up again later, but never be answered. That question is, what the fuck are these weird footies and why the fuck does Jiang Cheng wear them to bed?

Jiang Cheng reveals that his golden core is gone, that he can't cultivate any more, which means he can't avenge his parents or achieve any ambitions in life. Nobody has apparently given any thought to why Wen Zhuliu is called "Core-Melting Hand" before this, which is hilarious, frankly. If I fought with a guy called, for example, Brain-Eating Mouth, I think I would make certain assumptions about him and what he planned to do with my brain.

Something interesting is happening in this moment, because as he comes fully back to consciousness, Jiang Cheng pours out all of his trauma and horror to his brother, telling him about the core melting and practically wailing about his feelings over it all. And his brother understands, and ultimately finds a way to help him. What does Wei Wuxian do after his own trauma? Keeps it secret, so nobody finds a way to help him, although many people try to. So Jiang Cheng is, in this way at least...emotionally healthier than Wei Wuxian? That's unexpected.

Jiang Cheng is super upset and is mad at eternal scapegoat Wei Wuxian for saving him. Jiang Cheng would rather be dead than be a regular person. Whereas Wei Wuxian, faced with the same problem, is like, *shrug* I’ll adapt. These are both valid emotional responses to suddenly becoming disabled. Losing a golden core is definitely a disability, in this environment; it's not just about magic sword fights. Jiang Cheng's home is designed for people who can fly; Lan Wangji's home is designed for people who don't feel cold, and Wen Central is made of actual lava, for example. 

Jiang Cheng is already struggling with a lot of difficulties. He was raised by shitty parents, he's got anger management issues, he has a crushing weight of responsibility. And now he's also lived through the deaths of most of the people who matter to him. If sword cultivation is the one thing that gives him joy in life (ok one of two things, obviously fashion also gives him joy because he WORKS it), he can't reasonably be expected to rally when it's taken away.  

Oh, honey. Oh, baby boy. 

Wen Qing picks the worst moment to come in and tries to tend to Jiang Cheng, who starts off being devastated that the girl he likes is seeing the wreck he's become, and then moves along to helpless rage when he remembers that she's a Wen, and he screams at her to get out.  

Jiang Cheng is not able to put personal loyalty ahead of clan loyalty like Wei Wuxian is. Partly this is his nature, and partly it's his role as the lineal descendant of the clan leader. As a firstborn son of a gentry family, his destiny as clan leader is in his blood, and so is his responsibility to the clan. When Wei Wuxian praises Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen for caring less about bloodlines than about shared ambition, he is speaking from the position of someone who's bloodline ain't shit. Jiang Cheng will never be able to share that perspective.

Next: More of this excruciating episode!

Writing prompt: The Day I Discovered I Could Melt Your Fucking Core, by Wen Zhuliu Drabble prompt: Why I Wear Socks to Bed, by Jiang Cheng

[stiltonbasket]

If your prompts for the soulmate au are still open, could you please write about lsz trying to figure out who his other parent/his father’s soulmate is? Or maybe lwj feeling guilty about mourning wwx more than his actual soulmate? Thank you so much, and this is an amazing amazing fic!

Lan Sizhui’s father has a dead soulmate.

This isn’t a rare thing in the Cloud Recesses, not after the Sunshot Campaign and the Yiling Patriarch’s attack in Qishan a few years later. As far as he knows, Hanguang-jun lost his soulmate during the war, and Uncle Xichen lost his when Chifeng-zun died of qi deviation; and Great-uncle’s soulmate is dead, too, although she died long before Sizhui was even born.

But Hanguang-jun’s soulmate is still very much present in his life, because his other half was his wife, and Sizhui’s mother.

“She died just before the Sunshot Campaign officially began,” Sizhui’s nursery attendants would say, when they thought he wasn’t listening. “I was there on the day Hanguang-jun lost his bond with her, and it was one of the most horrible things I’d ever seen.”

“Death in childbirth, then?”

“I don’t think so. Hanguang-jun wasn’t quite that wretched afterwards, so Lan Yuan must be a little older than he looks.”

“Perhaps he didn’t know his wife was with child,” the second attendant suggested. “No one saw A-Yuan until he was two, so it’s possible.”

This was too much for the six-year-old Lan Yuan to bear, so the next time he has lunch with his father in the jingshi, he blurts out the fear that had been weighing on his heart for the last several days.

“Did I kill my mother, A-Die?” he gasps, clenching his chubby fists in his lap while Father makes a soft sound of surprise on the other side of the table. “Everyone says that mother died the year before the Sunshot Campaign, and that--that’s the year I was born, so did she die because she had me?”

Father’s lips turn white, and he reaches across the table to take Sizhui’s hands in his. “No, A-Yuan. Not at all. You were still a baby when your mother passed away, but it had nothing to do with you.”

“But how do you know?” Sizhui persists, his voice quivering as he fights with the urge to throw himself into Hanguang-jun’s lap and hide his face in his robes. “You weren’t there, so what if...what if she did?”

“Your mother did not die of natural causes,” Father says quietly--and Sizhui’s heart almost breaks on the spot, because this is the only thing his father has ever confirmed about Mother’s death, and it almost sounds worse than the alternative. “After I made my investigations, I learned that she took her own life.”

Lan Sizhui bursts into tears.

“It’s not fair,” he sobs, rubbing his face against Father’s clean silk gown and shivering in his arms like a piece of wet tofu. “A-Yi has his mother, and A-Lung does, too--I want her back, A-Die! I want A-Niang back!”

“I wish that, every day,” Hanguang-jun whispers. “In all these years since I lost her, I have never stopped wishing it. But she wanted you to be safe and grow up happy, so dry your tears for her sake. She loved you very much, Lan Yuan, and she loves you still, from wherever she is now.”

“And you, too?”

Hanguang-jun chokes and goes still for a moment, and then he gives a jerky nod before hiding his face in Sizhui’s rumpled hair.

“En,” he murmurs, so softly that Sizhui can scarcely hear him. “Yes, she loves me too.”

[crossdressingdeath]

Seeing your post about how JYL has a 'ranking system' in her head when it comes to WWX and JC hits so hard, but honestly, the more I read into the Jiang family dynamics, the more I agree. JYL obviously loves WWX, but I don't know if she's capable of putting him above JC. And we see her defending him, and she obviously gives her life for him, but she was also reacting in the moment. Not to speak lightly of her sacrifice of course, but I just feel like there are certain limits to how 1/7

far she's actually willing to go for him. I was initially one of JYL's staunch defenders, and always said that, unlike JC, she didn't have the same amount of political power as him, wasn't in a position to do anything about the Wens, ect. But...I'm starting to question if that's really true. JYL may not have had much direct political power herself, but she was the sister of a sect leader, and even if JC was unwilling to help, JYL had just married into the richest and most powerful sect 2/7

at the time. It was a love marriage, JZX adored her and would've done anything for her if she'd just bothered to ask him for it. Madam Jin also cared for her and respected her, and between her and JZX, had JYL actually bothered to tell them anything, I'm sure they would have been able to sort something out. Or she could have had it as a condition of her marriage - I'm not marrying into the sect that's trying to kill my brother unless you tell your father to stop. Had it been reversed and 3/7

The Lans were calling for JYL and JC’s deaths, no way in hell WWX would’ve just married into the sect, regardless of LWJ’s involvement. Instead she just doesn’t really do anything. We see no proof that she ever tried to see WWX after the wedding dress incident, which — god I instantly saw it as a sweet gesture, but now it just bothers me, because your brother is living in squalor, and you decide to show if the expensive dress that you’ll be 4/7

wearing when marrying into the sect that's trying to kill him, you bring along one bowl of soup for him, and don't even try to explain WHY you're marrying into said sect. Beyond that, we don't see a single moment up until her death where JYL actually seems concerned about WWX, puts in effort to try to see him - she doesn't even ask him how he's doing the one time she does come to see him. When we compare that to how WQ treats WN, yeah, she's outwardly not as loving or sweet, but she 5/7

goes to the ends of the earth for her brother, even going as far as to betray her sect and risk WRH's wrath because he asks her to. And now we come back to that ranking system you mentioned before - yeah, it really does seem like JYL places her blood family first, which definitely hurts, but in comparison, despite only knowing him for a shorter amount of time, WQ truly grows to think of WWX as a second brother. And she treats him as such, at an equal level with WN - after JZX dies 6/7

WQ doesn't attack WWX for what happened. She doesn't try to come up with a way to sacrifice WWX instead and let WN survive in his stead. She and WN, two people who have become WWX's family, both give their lives to protect both him and the rest of their remaining family members. And it's just frustrating to think that the one member of WWX's adopted family who we all thought treated him like an actual brother, might not have really been on his side after all. 7/7

Yes! To start with the wedding dress thing, because it drives me nuts when people treat that like some super sweet act of love: JYL shows up in the Burial Mounds with no money, no sign of having tried to talk the sects around, no news outside of her own, no food beyond a couple bowls of soup (one of which she gives to the guy who can’t eat), and doesn’t so much as ask WWX if he’s okay. She literally came all that way to have a family meal, ask WWX to name the future nephew it’s becoming increasingly clear he’ll never meet, and tell him about her impending marriage into the family that’s currently doing everything in its power to destroy WWX’s life. Like, if you think about it that entire visit is such a slap in the face; “Here’s a bowl of soup while the people under your protection are starving, oh by the way I’m going to marry the son of the guy actively trying to get you killed, okay bye”. All you can say in regards to her helping WWX is that she does potentially manage to persuade JZX to invite him to JL’s one month celebration, but if memory serves the novel never actually specifies whose idea that was and it was JZX who decided to go get WWX after JGY told him about seeing JZXun heading in the direction of the Burial Mounds. And even then JZX does the same thing JYL does; sees WWX outnumbered and surrounded and tells him to stand down. At least in JZX’s case you could argue that the actual fighting hadn’t broken out and JZX probably trusted in his authority to be able to sort the situation out so long as WWX wasn’t actually acting aggressive (or defensive, rather), and he’s also physically strong enough that he may well have been able to intervene if the cultivators had attacked. JYL, when she does the same thing, has no authority and no physical power to defend WWX with. And yeah, both JZX and Madam Jin adore JYL, and neither of them seem super fond of JGS (JZX respects his father, but I don’t get the sense he loves him); if JYL had asked them for help it’s entirely possible they would’ve started at least circulating her version of events and demanding a proper investigation into what happened. But there’s no mention of her so much as trying, and she doesn’t offer to ask them when she visits WWX.

And yeah, compare WQ to JYL and it’s... well. WQ is so quick to offer WWX her love and care? She’s harsh, but she loves him and views him and WN on such equal footing that she and WN willingly hand themselves over to the Jins for WWX’s sake without her so much as bringing up the possibility of saving WN instead. There’s no ranking for WQ; WWX and WN are her brothers, and she loves them, and she’d do anything to protect them. When it becomes clear she can’t save WN (like hell the sects would let him live, and by this point it’s pretty clear that WWX won’t be able to protect them forever) she throws her whole weight behind defending the brother she thinks she might still be able to save, even if it means bringing WN with her to die. WQ knows WWX for... a year or two? Maybe? The timeline is a little hazy. Not long compared to JYL, anyway. And yet she’s willing to walk all the way to Lanling to die in the hope of saving him. It’s for her whole family, yes, but she makes a point of including him. Basically, I think this fandom needs more stuff wherein the Jiangs and Wens survive and the Wens are fully like “Our brother now, you don’t deserve him”.

The thing with JYL is... she loves WWX, she genuinely does, but he is never going to be first for her. To the point where she outright enables JC’s abuse, in places; she always expects WWX to be the one to grin and bear it. Hell, one of their first conversations involves JYL cheerily allowing WWX to cover up JC locking him out of his bedroom and scaring him out into the woods by threatening to set dogs on him! Let me rephrase that: she allows a traumatized nine-year-old to hide the fact that the kid her dad expects him to share a room with locked him out of said room on his FIRST NIGHT and threatened him with his LITERALLY WORST FEAR, and as far as we know makes no attempt to tell JFM herself. To keep JC out of trouble. That is such a thing! WWX was scared to the point of running away and JFM expects him to share a room with the person responsible for that and JYL goes along with him promising not to tell JFM so that JC won’t get in trouble! And from that day forwards everything is just “Boys will be boys” to her. Like, let me put it this way. Before LWJ (and arguably the Wens before that, although WWX saw himself more as protector than protected there) JYL was the person WWX trusted to protect and care for and comfort him above all others, yeah? She’s the one he thinks of as having his back? He doesn’t tell her about JC trying to kill him. JC tries to kill WWX three times before JYL’s death, and WWX doesn’t say a word to her about any of them. You could argue that he doesn’t want to involve her, but... JYL pretty clearly takes JC’s side every time JC starts having a go at WWX. When he chases him out of their room, when he starts snapping about how annoying WWX is, when he stabs WWX... She never outright says it, but there really does come a point where by staying neutral you’re siding with the aggressor, and she reaches that point a lot. Hell, the stabbing is one of those aforementioned near-murders! JC stabbed him! According to WWX (who downplays serious injuries, he never exaggerates them) he had to hold his guts in! WWX is talking about a pretty fucking serious injury (and JYL grew up in a cultivation sect, I don’t believe for a second she doesn’t at least know what constitutes a serious injury) while JC whines about a broken arm like it’s worse than having to physically hold your guts in until you can reach a doctor and JYL acts like those are equal! JC could easily have killed WWX and has enough training with the sword to know better than to go for a blow like that in a staged fight and JYL doesn’t even suggest he should apologise.

Honestly? The more I think about JYL the more it pisses me off that she’s treated like WWX’s best sister more than WQ is. Imagine WQ seeing one brother stab the other in the gut and take the former’s side because the latter broke the former’s arm. Imagine WQ so much as considering allowing a child to cover up the kid he’s supposed to share a room with locking him out and scaring him into running away. She wouldn’t! Because WQ sees her brothers as equals. She won’t pick WN over WWX just because they’re blood siblings; she loves them both, and will choose based on who she thinks is in the right. And she wouldn’t just stay neutral to avoid rocking the boat, oh no. If WQ heard WWX say that WN stabbed him and did enough damage that he had to hold his guts in... oh boy would WN have a bad day. The thing with JYL is that she seems like a good sister in comparison to the rest of the Jiangs; stick canon JYL into a family that genuinely loves WWX and sees him as equal to their other children, and she would not look anywhere near as good.

[franniebanana]

CQL Rewatch - Episode 11

Is anyone else amazed at how quickly this place cleared out? It seems like it was less than an hour ago that they were still trying to kill each other, and now it’s just pristine and empty again. Magic of television! Also, reminder! Jin Guangyao is still mortally wounded and hobbling around.

I love how caring they both are for each other here. They really feel like brothers instead of a master/servant role. Nie Huaisang is worried for Jin Guangyao, and the feeling is mutual. It’s a relationship that I never paid much attention to on the first watch, so it’s nice to go back and see it again, and notice that it exists. You can sense the bond and the closeness between these two, and it’s quite nice—also makes the betrayal sting more.

Ah, and the little shared moment between Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao—it’s sweet that he hasn’t forgotten the kindness that Wei Wuxian has shown him—he always treated him with respect, regardless of his background. Also I wonder if Jiang Cheng feels annoyed here, because Jin Guangyao salutes him second….

See? Nie Mingjue was so pissed that he knocked over all his art and stuff. I like that little detail. We see the aftermath, but we didn’t see him actually do it. We didn’t need to—we know he’s upset and feels horrible that he even had to make that decision, let alone carry it out. We don’t know much about their relationship yet, but it’s very clear that they were close and they respected each other a lot, for Nie Mingjue to be this emotional about Jin Guangyao’s actions and banishment.

NMJ: What are you two going to do next?

WWX: Um, I’m going to go rescue my boyfriend.

Okay, so I know how the story goes, and Wei Wuxian does not go to the Cloud Recesses again for a very, very long time. However, they’ve already added so much, why couldn’t they throw that in? Just saying, I wouldn’t have minded more wangxian moments, okay? But this part makes me giggle a little, because Wei Wuxian does, indeed, want to go after Lan Wangji (the guy left, basically without telling him)—Wei Wuxian is worried about Lan Wangji going off alone, especially because of what the Wen Clan is up to. And of course Jiang Cheng has to cock block by saying that they need to go home, because if the Wens are after the Gusu Lan and the Nie Clan, then they are probably going for the Jiangs as well. Okay, okay, it makes sense, Jiang Cheng—but do you not understand how much I want to see more wangxian?

But the important thing there (important meaning the thing that I like the most) is that Wei Wuxian thinks of Lan Wangji first. It’s not the last time either. It’s part of the growing feeling that Lan Wangji becomes more his family than his family does (and I mean, they aren’t his blood relatives, anyway). Yes, Wei Wuxian loves his family at Lotus Pier, but you can’t say that he doesn’t also consider Lan Wangji part of his family. At this point, he’s already willing to risk his life for Lan Wangji. And the reverse is true as well. I’m not going to go off on too much of a tangent, but I love that this story features two people who fit in better with each other than with their actual families.

At this point, even if I didn’t know the story, I’d be thinking, “Okay, how hard are they going to fall?” Lotus Pier is too idyllic, too perfect, the people too friendly, too happy—you know it’s all going to come tumbling down. And this story is so tragic (we know that right off the bat—the first scene is Wei Wuxian dying) that you absolutely know that something horrible is about to happen.

But aside from that, I like in the book how Wei Wuxian basically has a tab open with all the vendors and Jiang Fengmian has to foot the bill. It’s cute that Wei Wuxian has a relationship with all these vendors (or at least that one in particular)—like he’s willing to be amongst the common people. It’s clear here that Jiang Cheng isn’t. They know his face, because he’s the clan leader’s son, but he doesn’t seem to share the same relationships that Wei Wuxian does. And obviously in this scene, he just wants to get home and see if everything is okay. He’s very family-focused.

I’ve been reading a lot of discourse on Jiang Cheng lately, and this scene makes me feel a lot of emotions. It’s true that Jiang Cheng’s character in The Untamed is different from MDZS. A lot of his angry remarks seem to come from a place of caring (at first), because it seems he really does care about Wei Wuxian quite a bit, and I think he considers him family. But at a certain point, his well-meaning, angry remarks start to become old, and I feel bad for Wei Wuxian that he is so eager to take the blame for things that were not his fault. He goes along with Lan Wangji (without permission), and Jiang Cheng says it’s his fault for putting them all in danger, for being punished, for everything—but Jiang Cheng didn’t have to sneak off either. Is he not responsible for his own actions? Had it really only been about his concern over Wei Wuxian, he could have just talked to their father (who knew about it and basically didn’t care, which is whatever). My heart kind of breaks for the rocky relationship these two boys have, and to know that it will completely crumble in just a short amount of time.

But that’s also what I love about it. What I love about Jiang Cheng is that he’s basically horrible. He’s self-centered, he’s unkind, he’s cold, and he can hold a grudge better than anyone I’ve ever seen. I truly enjoy the fact that he and Wei Wuxian have an irreparably damaged relationship by the end of this.

“In the afterlife, let’s still be brothers,” Wei Wuxian says, and Jiang Cheng pushes Wei Wuxian’s hand off of his shoulder. It’s such a kind of off-hand remark, but it’s so meaningful in this series, since the opposite ends up happening. But I feel like this is their relationship at its core: Wei Wuxian trying to be better and eager to please, while Jiang Cheng is always responding that he’s not good enough, always shrugging him off. No wonder he becomes so close with Lan Wangji, a man who sees Wei Wuxian for what he is, yet loves him anyway.

I’m really inclined to agree with Madam Yu here: Jiang Fengmian is not really prepared for what’s going to happen, and considering in this adaptation, I think he even knows more of what’s going on with the Wen Clan than he did in the book. I believe Wei Wuxian aptly pointed out in episode 10 that this indoctrination is basically to hold the heirs ransom while the Wen Clan tries to take control—it’s to keep the other clans from acting up so they can get what they want (which in The Untamed is the Yin Iron, of course).

But aside from that, this seems like the most unpleasant table to sit at ever, next to these two people who probably very rarely get along. I think in this scene, you find out that Madam Yu thinks that her husband isn’t tough enough or prepared enough for future attacks, that she believes he was cheating on her and in love with Wei Wuxian’s mother, and that Jiang Cheng is unfairly treated between the two of them. That’s a shit-ton of accusations right there!

I actually do wish that we knew more about Jiang Fengmian’s relationship to Wei Wuxian’s mother and why he took him in. They must have been very close. Maybe I’m not remembering correctly and they delve into it a little more later.

But! What I also noticed in this scene is that Jiang Cheng and his mother are wearing matching outfits, while Jiang Yanli matches her dad, wearing purple.

I audibly gasped when I saw this. He’s using one of Wei Wuxian’s talismans!! OMG!!!! But I never noticed that the first time, so I was super excited to see that! How cool is it that Lan Wangji respects Wei Wuxian enough to not only accept one of his talismans, but to also use it? I love that detail! They didn’t have to include a scene to show it, but the fact that they threw it in makes me so happy. And even when they aren’t together, it’s like they’re together! My heart!

And visually, it also looks cool, so I’m always pleased to see some more magic in this series, in particular the talisman magic, which always looks pretty. The butterflies here remind me of the butterfly that Lan Xichen sends Lan Wangji way later.

Oh, it’s also interesting that the characters that come at odds with Lan Wangji always point out his arrogance, but, like, he’s not. They mistake his coldness and his lack of verbosity to being conceited, but I really don’t think that’s the case. There is literally a Lan Clan principle that says not to speak unless you have something important to say. For example, the kind of chattering that Wei Wuxian does is against their rules. Lan Wangji has been brought up in this stark, spartan environment, and he has been a rule follower. Actually looking down on people for the sake of being arrogant is even against their principles—I mean…I don’t expect Wen Chao to know this, but people like Su She certain should.

I like the contrast here between Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen meditating, their incense burning, all the tea cups and knick-knacks sitting just so—and utter death and destruction outside. The Cloud Recesses are literally on fire and you two are sitting in here trying to meditate. I get it. Gusu Lan are probably the most pacifistic of all the clans, so this is totally against everything their clan is about. But really, you’re sending all your red shirts out there to die.

Also I have no idea why Lan Qiren is spitting up blood in this scene. Did he overexert himself…meditating? Maybe I’m being ignorant here. Maybe he’s doing some magic to keep the Wens at bay (even though they’re getting in and all…).

I keep having these moments where I find myself thinking, “I didn’t pay attention to this part at all the first time, but now I see how great it is.” And here’s another one. For starters, I didn’t notice Lan Xichen was crying—I knew he was getting really emotional, but I didn’t see the tears on his face until just now. Here’s a man only a few years older than Lan Wangji, possibly still a teenager at this point (in the book, he was still underage at the start of the Sunshot Campaign if I remember the notes correctly), who has no idea where his younger brother is (who he probably helped raise), pleading with his uncle to take the treasured books in the library and escape.

And then you have Lan Qiren, who also has no idea where one of his nephews is and showing genuine concern that he’s missing (once again), whose other nephew is offering up his own life in order to save his. Lan Qiren practically raised both Wangji and Xichen as if they were his own, so the last thing he wants is for either of them to come to harm. I really love this moment, seeing the Lans’ faces crumble with emotion and show that pain and grief that they are feeling, that they normally keep in check. You get to see that, yes, they are human too. And I think this is especially important with Lan Qiren, who up until this point has just been kind of a hardass. But it’s also great to see Lan Xichen fall apart like this, because he’s been so sage and wise, and so adult up to this point. Now we’re forced to see that no, he’s still young, he’s inexperienced, he can break down too.

I do think it’s kind of ridiculous that the rest of the Gusu Lan Clan is basically useless in a fight, but I will never turn down a boss bitch Lan Wangji entrance (no matter how corny it is). I mean, I guess he doesn’t do all that much. He throws some guqin chords at them and gives them time to hide in the Cold Pond Cave. But ultimately, it doesn’t matter, because he ends up giving up the Yin Iron shard anyway.

I’m sure he’s feeling like he’s let down at least his entire clan and, at most, the rest of the world who would stand against the Wen Clan. But I think he was faced with the choice of seeing his people completely come to ruin or handing over the Yin Iron—either one is bad, but in the end, he chose people over power. I think that’s very fitting with Lan Wangji in any adaptation: he will do what’s right, he will choose humanity over any kind of power. He’s later willing to give up everything for Wei Wuxian, because in the end, it’s not his reputation or his standing among the clans that matters. I like here that Lan Qiren doesn’t try and stop him either—he understands that the people are most important and allows his nephew to make that choice.

It’s a nice scene overall, plus more Cold Pond Cave looks, which I love (I can’t get over the frost in his eyebrows, it’s just sexy). And anytime Wang Yibo gets to show some emotion on his face is a good time as well—I love what he does with his micro-expressions, but that makes the impact of scenes where he shows a lot on his face even greater. Like, if his eyebrows knit together, you know something big is going down!

It’s super cute that Jiang Yanli is giving them all this food to take along. She can’t go, she can’t help them, and she can’t do anything for them once they leave Lotus Pier, so the only thing she can think of to take care of them is to give them food. It’s such a sweet moment, but there’s a desperation to her actions as well. There is such a tension in the air and it’s affecting the entire family. Also not surprising that Madam Yu isn’t there to see them off. (Wei Wuxian’s cute wave at the end—god, he’s too adorable.)

That’s the look of somebody who’s seeing their close friend after a long time, when they were worried sick about them, when they had written letters that went unanswered, when their first thought upon entering this place was, “Where is the Gusu Lan sect?” Either the director told Xiao Zhan, “You’re in love” or he just did it on his own, because I mean, come on.

Basically, Wei Wuxian’s priority here is Lan Wangji, and I won’t hear any different. He’s not thinking about the mission or his creed or the Yin Iron—he wants to know how Lan Wangji is doing. He heard about what was going on in the Cloud Recesses, and he just wants to know if he’s all right. Even after he stops saying, “Lan Zhan,” which he says several times (I didn’t count), he still continues to look at Lan Wangji.

Other episodes: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 |

[sincerelystranger]

author: a little wwx pov of my hananaki fic

---

Wei Wuxian flies back to Lotus Pier by himself in the dead of night.

The pain in his chest as his heart breaks to pieces is almost surprisingly painful, but he finds that he can’t even cry. The wind is cold on his face and harsh on his cheeks, but all he can focus on is the heat on his lips – the too real memory of Lan Zhan’s lips on his.

At least he has that.

Wei Wuxian won’t be greedy. That will be enough.

It’s almost embarrassing now to remember how eager he had been to go to Gusu. Lan Xichen had come to Lotus Pier, pale and tired, and asked Wei Wuxian if he could just… try. He had said that Lan Zhan was coughing up flowers and he had whispered Wei Wuxian’s name in his sleep. Lan Xichen had said that he wasn’t sure but… maybe?

And… Wei Wuxian had been so excited. He had been in love with Lan Zhan for so long – had only recently started coughing up flowers himself. Could Lan Zhan really be in love with him as well?

He had wanted to find out.

And… And Lan Zhan was in love with him. He was.

And that was enough.

Because of course Lan Zhan would regret falling in love with Wei Wuxian. Of course. He feels so stupid for having been excited because what else could he have expected? Of course, Lan Zhan regretted him. Of course.

He can’t help but laugh when he coughs and a white columbine falls out of his mouth. He catches it in his hand. Holds it alongside the striped carnation that had fallen from Lan Zhan’s lips as he had looked him.

Of course.

Jiang Cheng is waiting for him when he lands.

“Well?” he asks, his arms crossed and eyebrows furrowed, “Is he in love with you?”

Wei Wuxian laughs and hands Jiang Cheng the striped carnation. “In regret of me, I think,” he says, and he has to rush to his room because the look on Jiang Cheng’s face is too much to bear.

He coughs up marigolds all night, and finds solace in the fact that they are beautiful.

He falls into a fitful sleep and dreams. Dreams of Lan Zhan and flowers and things too good for Wei Wuxian to deserve.

Jiang Cheng is kind to him in the morning.

“Never much liked those Lan brothers anyway,” he huffs, pushing the larger bowl of soup towards Wei Wuxian, “What was Lan Xichen even thinking? Asking you to fly to Cloud Recesses on such short notice.”

“He’s just concerned about his brother,” shijie says. She pats Wei Wuxian on the cheek and smiles. “Our A-Xian is very kind to have gone with him.”

Jiang Cheng snorts and eats a spoonful of soup. “You say kind, I say stupid,” he says, “All he came back with was a broken heart and a stupid flower.”

“It’s not stupid,” Wei Wuxian says, taking a spoonful of soup himself, “It’s from Lan Zhan.”

Jiang Cheng rolls his eyes so hard, all Wei Wuxian can see are the whites of his eyes. “Your precious Lan Zhan is in love with someone else,” he says bitingly, “Get over him or you’ll start coughing up flowers too.”

It hits too close to the truth for Wei Wuxian to defend himself.  

“Don’t be mean,” shijie defends for him. She pats Wei Wuxian on the head, “It’s his loss if he’s not in love with our A-Xian,” she says, her eyes so kind that Wei Wuxian almost wants to tell her the truth.

Almost.

Wei Wuxian’s life goes back to normal. He laughs and trains and swims and hides the flowers that fall from his lips. He eats soup and bothers shijie and when she brushes a thumb under his eye and asks if he’s sleeping well lately, he smiles big and lies.

“I guess Lan Xichen found whoever Lan Wangji is in love with,” Jiang Cheng says over dinner one night. “It’s strange though. I hear he’s been going to meetings with other eligible young masters and ladies.”

Shijie shoots a worried look at him, but Wei Wuxian is fine – he’s fine – so he smiles back reassuringly.

“Maybe the person he was in love with wasn’t a good match,” Wei Wuxian says breezily. He tells himself it’s fine. It’s fine.

It’s fine.

His chest always feels like this – is always crumbling in on itself – and the tightness in his throat is because he laughed too much during the day.

Wei Wuxian is fine.

Shijie places a hand over his and catches his eye. “Maybe if he’s taking meetings, we could have father ask Grandmaster Lan?”

She means so well. Her heart is so good. Wei Wuxian loves her and loves her and loves her.

Jiang Cheng snorts, “You’re rubbing salt on an open wound, shijie,” he says.

“It’s fine,” Wei Wuxian says – or at least that’s what he means to say. A blue forget-me-not falls out instead.

An eerie silence falls over the table.

Jiang Cheng’s eyes are huge in the candlelight. His hand is frozen in mid-air, a spoon full of soup dangling precariously in his fingers.

“It’s fine,” Wei Wuxian coughs, grabbing the flower off the table and crushing it in his hands. “I’m fine.”

---

Jiang Cheng’s rage is a palpable thing in the room.

“I’m going to Cloud Recesses,” he growls, “and you’re coming with me.”

“No,” Wei Wuxian says, and strangely, now that his secret is out in the open, he feels lighter. “It won’t do us any good, and I don’t want to bother Lan Zhan with this.”

“Bother!?” Jiang Cheng yells, “You think you dying is a bother? I’ll drag that Lan-er to Lotus Pier by his hair if it means keeping you alive.”

“A-Xian, please,” shijie says, holding onto his sleeve desperately, “You went all the way there for Lan-er-gongzi, I’m sure they would… Even if Lan-er-gongzi is taking meetings, I’m sure…”

It’s so stupid and embarrassing, Wei Wuxian still doesn’t want to admit it.

“It was me,” he says finally, “The person Lan Zhan was in love with was me…”

“What do you mean?” Jiang Cheng asks, his voice low and dangerous. He’s so angry it’s touching. Wei Wuxian always knew Jiang Cheng loved him, but he never realized just how much.

“That night, when I went to Cloud Recesses with Xichen-xiong… I kissed Lan Zhan. He got better,” Wei Wuxian explains stiltedly.

“So… why?”

Wei Wuxian shrugs. “I told you,” he says, a wry smile on his lips, “he regretted me. Anyway, it’s a strange disease. Who knows why the kiss didn’t work for me.”

“A-Xian,” shijie whimpers, and Wei Wuxian is devastated to see that she’s crying. “You’ve been sick for that long? Why didn’t you tell us?”

“I’m sorry, shijie,” he says, his head down. He feels ashamed for the first time in a while. He never meant to hurt shijie. He grabs her hand and holds it between his, pulls it up to rub it against his cheek. “Don’t cry, shijie. I’ll be fine.”

Jiang Cheng leaves the room, but his anger stays.

---

Almost as if being found out opened a box, Wei Wuxian becomes sicker overnight. Flowers fall out of his mouth almost constantly, and blood trickles out with them. He can barely eat or sleep or do anything at all other than sit in his bed and cough flowers.

Shijie is constantly by his side, wiping his mouth and trying to feed him spoonfuls of soft rice and soup.  

“I’ll be fine,” he whispers, smiling at her, “You should get some rest.” She looks so worried – he feels so sorry for having to put her through this. It would have been better if he had been cursed with some disease that would kill him overnight. This slow death is nothing but a burden to everyone around him.

Shijie returns his smile, even as fat tears fall down from her eyes. She pushes his bangs off his sweaty forehead and places her cool hand on his cheek. “My A-Xian,” she says, “how could anyone regret you?”

White Lily-of-the-valleys fall from his lips as he looks at her – his shijie.

He picks them up off of the blanket and does his best to wipe the blood off before handing them to her. “You already love me more than I deserve, shijie,” he says, using the back of his hand to wipe away her tears, “it’s my fault for wanting more.”

Shijie takes the flowers from his hands and throws them to the ground, her face falling into her hands as she sobs. “I will hate flowers, A-Xian,” she wails, “I will hate flowers and I will hate those Lans. I will – I will.”

Wei Wuxian pats her back gently. “Don’t hate them, shijie,” he whispers, “they’re beautiful.”

---

Jiang Cheng brings every healer he can find.

Wei Wuxian meets so many of them he can’t keep count.

Jiang Cheng brings a famous healer from Qinghe – almost kills him when he says that nothing can be done for Wei Wuxian. He brings a witch from Hebei, a supposed immortal from Zhapu, a non-cultivation healer who supposedly brought back a man from the dead, and so many more that Wei Wuxian can’t even remember their faces.

All of them say the same thing. Wei Wuxian cannot be cured unless he is kissed with love in return.

“I’m going to Cloud Recesses,” Jiang Cheng growls, his face dark with anger and worry. His undereyes are dark – he’s wearing himself out trying to find a cure for Wei Wuxian.

Wei Wuxian reaches out and places his hand over Jiang Chengs. It’s all he can do lately. He’s just so tired. “Don’t bother Lan Zhan with this,” he whispers, “This disease is humiliating enough as it is. I don’t want Lan Zhan to come here out of some sort of guilt.”

“Who cares if it’s guilt?” Jiang Cheng cries, and Wei Wuxian thinks his heart breaks when Jiang Cheng’s voice does. “Whatever is needed to cure you of this stupid disease – “

“Anyway, it won’t work,” Wei Wuxian says, and he has to close his eyes because it’s all too much. “He’s not in love with me.”

Lan Zhan’s not in love with him, and even when he was, he regretted it to the point that he would rather die than admit it.

But still…

Wei Wuxian had kissed him. Wei Wuxian had saved his life.

That was enough.

Wei Wuxian coughs and blue forget-me-nots fall from his mouth.

---

Jiang Cheng is gone when Wei Wuxian wakes back up.

Shijie is beside him, a bloody handkerchief in her hands. “Father and Jiang Cheng have gone to Cloud Recesses,” she tells him.

She must read the worry on his face because she sighs. “They will not bother Lan-er-gongzi,” she says, running her cool fingers across his forehead. “They are only going there to ask for some healers. Perhaps they know of something…”

It’s foolish and desperate, Wei Wuxian knows this. Again, he finds himself wishing he would die faster. This slow death was just hurting everyone around him. Tearing them down and tiring them out.

He leans into shijie’s touch.

“I’m sorry for making everyone go to so much trouble,” he whispers, and he tastes blood in his mouth as his throat tears.

Shijie cups his cheek and shakes her head. “My A-Xian,” she says, and her voice breaks, but thankfully she does not cry. “My lovely A-Xian.”

He loves her and he’s sorry that he’s making her go through so much.

If only Wei Wuxian had known that falling in love was so dangerous. He would have still fallen in love with Lan Zhan, of course, but he would have done it more quietly. He would have hidden himself away the moment flowers began falling from his lips. He wouldn’t hurt his shijie like this. He wouldn’t hurt Jiang Cheng like this.

It was too late now, of course.

Of course.

It’s too late for regret.

He opens his mouth to say, “I’m sorry” but blue forget-me-nots fall out instead.

Shijie wipes them off the bedspread before he can grab them and dabs away the blood trickling down his chin.

“When you get better, I’ll introduce you to Mianmian,” shijie says, a wobbly smile on her lips. “You’ll like her, she’s pretty and kind and a great cultivator.”

Wei Wuxian grabs her hand, stops her dabbing, and smiles at her.

She smiles back, even as her lips tremble.

“I hear the young master of the Tingshan He Sect is very agreeable as well,” she says, “You know he asked for you last summer, remember? Maybe you can meet up with him when you get a little better.”

Wei Wuxian smiles and nods, because it’s the only thing he has left to give.

He’ll never meet Mianmian or the young master from Tingshan He.

Wei Wuxian will drown in Lotus Pier, choking on his love for Lan Zhan as it grows too big to be contained in his body.

It’s inevitable.

Lan Zhan is too good and Wei Wuxian is too greedy.

But…

But Wei Wuxian has kissed Lan Zhan, and Lan Zhan had been in love with him.

That’s enough.

Wei Wuxian will die with no regrets because he’s already received more than he could have ever dreamed.

---

It feels inevitable when the door opens and Lan Zhan walks in.

Of course, he would come, Wei Wuxian thinks to himself. Lan Zhan is so good and so good and so good. Of course he would come.

He must have flown here from Cloud Recesses, but he doesn’t have a hair out of place. He’s almost too beautiful to look at outright. Wei Wuxian knows that he told Jiang Cheng that he didn’t want Lan Zhan to come here, but… but he’s glad to see him one last time.

“Wei Wuxian…” Lan Zhan says, and Wei Wuxian loves the way his name sounds out of Lan Zhan lips. He’s so blessed to be able to hear it one last time.

He smiles widely, grateful beyond all sense that Lan Zhan came to see him.

He opens his mouth to say hello, but red chrysanthemums fall out instead.

I love you.

If it were any less true, he would feel embarrassed, but he strangely feels grateful for this disease – it says the things he’s too cowardly to say out loud.

“Why are you… ill?” Lan Zhan asks, moving to take a seat on the foot of Wei Wuxian’s bed.

Wei Wuxian furrows his brows and cocks his head to the side. Doesn’t Lan Zhan understand? He’s had this disease too once, hadn’t he? Maybe he doesn’t know what red chrysanthemums mean.

Shijie dabs at his face before he can open his mouth again. “Has my brother not suffered enough?” she asks softly, and Wei Wuxian tries to catch Lan Zhan’s eyes. Tries to communicate to him that his sister is just grieving. That her words don’t mean to be so harsh. “Have you come here to offer some sort of condolences? Does it please you to see him like this, Lan-er-gongzi?”

Lan Zhan looks devastated by shijie’s words. Wei Wuxian feels terrible for him. No one does a better guilt trip that his shijie – no one.

He grabs her hand and brings it to his cheek. Don’t be so cruel to the love of my life, he tries to communicate. It’s not his fault that he does not love me.

“But we kissed,” Lan Zhan whispers, confusion in his voice.

Wei Wuxian smiles at him because Lan Zhan looks so guilty and he shouldn’t. It’s not his fault. Lan Zhan hasn’t done anything wrong. He shouldn’t look so devastated.

Wei Wuxian pounds his chest, trying to clear the flowers, and tries to speak. His voice comes out in a weak whisper. “It’s a strange disease,” he says, “don’t worry, Lan Zhan. I’ll be fine. Sorry to make you come all this way.”

He wants to say more – wants to say more sorry’s and thank you’s and I love you’s – but purple heliotropes fall out instead.

Eternal devotion.

He guesses that’s close enough.

His sister sobs next to him, dabbing at his face with shaking hands, fat tears rolling down her cheeks and onto the blanket.

“A-Xian,” she whispers, “my A-Xian.”

Lan Zhan looks so uncomfortable.

Wei Wuxian feels so sorry.

He pulls shijie close, hides her face in his chest so that she can have the smallest bit of privacy in the wave of her grief.

Lan Zhan leaves.

Wei Wuxian watches him as he walks out.

Goodbye, my love, he thinks fondly, goodbye.

Sometime after consoling shijie, he falls asleep. He dreams beautiful dreams. Dreams of Lan Zhan happy with someone else – someone he doesn’t regret. Dreams of shijie laughing and flowers growing on her windowsill. Dreams of Jiang Cheng. Dreams of the flowers he likes embroidered on the bottom of his robes.

Wei Wuxian falls asleep and he dreams about becoming a flower.

Dreams of how nice it would be to grow and die and not bother anyone at all.

Goodbye.  

[baoshan-sanren]

Chapter 39

of the wwx emperor au I’m thinking of calling Fuck the Canon: Happy Endings For Everyone

Prologue | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 Part 1 | Chapter 8 Part 2 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 Part 1 | Chapter 15 Part 2 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 Part 1 | Chapter 22 Part 2 | Chapter 23 | Chapter 24 | Chapter 25 | Chapter 26 | Chapter 27 | Chapter 28 | Chapter 29 | Chapter 30 | Chapter 31 | Chapter 32 | Chapter 33 | Chapter 34 | Chapter 35 | Chapter 36 | Chapter 37 | Chapter 38

The meeting concludes in a way that is more than satisfactory to the Emperor, if not so satisfactory to the rest of the Council.

Jiang FengMian is to retain his title of High Councilor, but only to soften the blow of the abrupt transition of power. A period of five years has been determined as sufficient for this task. Uncle Jiang will use those years to guide his replacement in the court intricacies and details of his responsibilities, which will ensure full transparency in this particular shift of power.  

The choice of the next High Councilor had been the bloodiest battle of the day, one that had drawn the meeting to a standstill for hours. Wei Ying would not budge from his choice however, and once fully aware of his intentions, uncle Jiang had given his firm and unquestionable support. With uncle XingChen’s help, they had wrangled the Council into submission, skillfully enough where Wei Ying had felt guilty, all over again, for nearly causing uncle Jiang to qi deviate that very morning.

Shijie will make an excellent High Councilor. Behind her gentle voice and agreeable manner, there is strength of conviction that the Sect Leaders will find as unyielding as a rocky mountain side. Wei Ying cannot wait to see her turn all that sweet charm and strength of will against Sect Leader Yao, or any of the other men long accustomed to Jiang FengMian’s flexibility. Wei Ying may actually start attending Sect Leader meetings regularly, just for entertainment’s sake.

With the High Councilor being forced into retirement within five years, and the Council itself on the verge of dissolving, the question of the Emperor’s marriage to a Second Young Master of a disgraced Sect is no longer as grave as it would have appeared under less serious circumstances. It was immediately apparent which Sect Leaders had spent their morning in close talks with the Royal Companion. These men, fidgeting and nervous, had voiced their support for the marriage before Wei Ying could even fully voice his intentions.

He had never felt the need to ask A-Sang what particular leverage he has over certain sect leaders, or how he had come to obtain it. A-Sang has always been eerily skilled at ferreting out their secrets and honing in on their weaknesses. The information A-Sang has on them must be significant, because they would not be influenced to withdraw their support, regardless of the pressure from the other Council members.

Wei Ying is allowed to marry anyone he chooses, Lan Zhan included.

It is a good day, and he feels immeasurably happy leaving the council hall, watching the Sect Leaders drift away in a daze, as if physically beaten into submission. He had promised Lan Zhan that he would give him time to speak with his uncle, to speak with his brother, to consult with the Lan Sect Elders. He had promised as much time as Lan Zhan wants or needs. Still, it is a struggle not to immediately seek him out and make the proposal again, properly this time, with all the pomp and ceremony.

He will not. He will be patient. But.

Someone should inform Lan Zhan that the Council has reached a favorable decision. This is not information that Lan Zhan should obtain second-hand, through gossip and idle chatter. Wei Ying will not pressure him, but informing him that the Council had given its unanimous approval would be the proper, respectful thing to do. It is nowhere near the thing Wei Ying actually wants to do, which is to fall to his knees and latch on to Lan Zhan’s ankles and beg him to agree to the marriage now.

Perhaps if he only strolled by the Imperial guest chambers. Casually. And happened to catch the sight of Lan Zhan, perhaps he could--

“Wei WuXian!”

The shout echoes against the high ceiling, rebounding down the hallway with force.

There is only one person who would dare shout his name in the Jade Sword Palace, and that person is currently waiting for him at the South Lakes Pavilion. Also, A-Cheng rarely disrespects him in public, unless Wei Ying has done something truly obnoxious.

He turns to find Jin ZiXuan striding down the hallway, his sword drawn, his face red and furious.

Uh-oh Wei Ying thinks.

He had forgotten all about him.

“Wei WuXian!! How dare you!?”

His voice is nearly obliterated by the sound of blades being drawn all around them, both Imperial Guards and the Jiang Sect forming a wall in front of Wei Ying. Jin GuangShan, who is not the member of the Council, and yet, is always somehow found hovering in the vicinity of every Council meeting, throws himself in front of Jin ZiXuan.

Wei Ying has never before seen Jin GuangShan look visibly terrified; it is not nearly as amusing as he had expected it to be.  

“What are you standing there for?” he snaps at the four disciples following behind Jin ZiXuan, all four clearly distraught, “Grab him.”

Jin ZiXuan wheels on the four disciples, sword at the ready, as if daring them to try.

“Please forgive my son, Your Majesty,” Jin GuangShan exclaims, “He has been ill lately, and speaking nonsense. We have had him confined for his own safety. I will take him back immediately. ZiXuan, your mother must be worried to death! Let us go back.”

Jin ZiXuan is practically vibrating. Wei Ying has never seen the Young Master of the Jin Sect this overwrought; he would not have thought it possible.

The dignified, puffed-up peacock is acting like an absolute madman. It is fascinating to watch. Wei Ying wishes A-Sang was here to see it for himself.

“I demand an account of the Emperor!” the youth shouts, “I demand to know why my betrothal was dissolved! I have the right to know!”

“You have a right to nothing!” Jin GuangShan shouts in his face, his beard quivering in agitation, “It is not on you to question the Emperor! Your Majesty,” he turns to Wei Ying, his smile sickly, “As you can see, he is not well. Please do not listen to anything he says. This illness is a personal matter, one that will be resolved quickly.”

“I am not ill!” Jin ZiXuan shakes off his father’s insistent grip to point his sword at Wei Ying, as if unaware of the three dozen swords that point at him in turn, “I demand an answer!”

Wei Ying does not have an answer, at least not an answer that would satisfy Jin ZiXuan. The dissolution of the engagement was nothing more than a power move in a game he had intended to win at any cost.

Shijie knows that Wei Ying will eventually allow the marriage to take place. He would never deny her happiness for his own gain, even if he cannot possibly comprehend what happiness can be gained from marrying into the Jin Sect.

But Jin ZiXuan does not know that the dissolution of his betrothal is not a permanent measure. And apparently, he feels quite strongly about this, a revelation that is somehow both satisfactory and annoying.

“Your Majesty,” Jiang FengMian says, “I do believe that Jin ZiXuan must be seriously ill. Otherwise, he would never act like this. Please allow Sect Leader Jin to take his son back. We will summon the Head Healer immediately.”

Jin ZiXuan looks as if he may stab the next person who suggests that he is ill.

“Nonsense,” Sect Leader Yao exclaims, just when his opinion is least wanted or needed, “No illness excuses such disrespect. Any man who speaks to the Emperor in this way should be accused of inciting rebellion, and his life be made forfeit.”

Jin GuangShan looks horrified. Jiang FengMain grimaces into his beard.

Wei Ying does not want to laugh, but it is incredibly difficult to keep a straight face. Sect Leader Yao, who would slander his own mother if it gained him favor, accusing someone else of disrespect. A-Sang will be furious he has missed this performance.

“Put him in the dungeons for now,” Wei Ying says, “Let us see if his head cools. Do not hurt him!” he adds quickly, as the Imperial guard advances to seize Jin ZiXuan’s sword.  

Predictably, Jin ZiXuan fights them, and predictably, he loses, although Wei Ying has to admit that the boy’s skills are fairly decent.

“Your Majesty,” uncle Jiang begins, his voice concerned, “the Young Master’s illness--“

“He is not ill,” Wei Ying snorts quietly, so his voice would not carry to Sect Leader Yao, “He is young, stupid, and angry. I identify, but cannot condone such behavior in public.”

“Your Majesty,” Jin GuangShan is kneeling, his face as gray as the stone arch behind him, “I beg leniency for my son. He is truly not well--“

“Sect Leader,” Wei Ying interrupts coldly, “Do not invite me to speak words we may both regret in the future. Your son had drawn his sword with the intent to cause harm to the Emperor. What possible leniency can you seek that I have not already shown?”

Jin GuangShan says nothing else, and his silence is somehow more unsettling than all the falsehoods that so frequently spill out of his mouth. He remains kneeling even as Wei Ying gathers his escort, and continues down the hallway as if nothing of significance had occurred.

“This will cause problems, Your Majesty,” uncle Jiang says softly.

“Then do your job, and ensure that it does not.”

[amedetoiles]

pls tell me your thoughts about the potential for wwx-jgy friendship? i just like the idea of them having similar experiences as like: poor street kid/poor brothel kid, would kill god for the people they care about, made of knives, incredibly charming and personable. i feel like they could have Seen each other and understood each other really well, and like, things would have ended up better maybe?

Gosh. Ok, so full disclosure before I answer this: I am really not the most sympathetic towards Jin Guangyao. I am just not a fan of him in any universe where he is complicit if not directly responsible for the death of his own child to protect his own reputation (up for debate, but nonetheless Jin Rusong fucking deserved better), gaslights his wife / half-sister into committing suicide, and has a monologue meltdown about how difficult his life has been to his own orphaned and bullied nephew whose childhood he had a hand in destroying. I am glad he got kicked down the same stairs twice, and I am glad Nie Huaisang beat him at his own game. All in all to say that my thoughts on him might be colored by this. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

But let’s get into this! Jin Guangyao is a great character foil to Wei Wuxian. The circumstances of his life that shaped his morality (or lack thereof) and the choices he makes in response are tragic and understandable. I definitely think Jin Guangyao could have been a different person, a better person, if his father wasn’t such a trash heap, if society hadn’t been such a gigantic dick about his mother, and if he hadn’t needed to claw his way into achieving everything he did. Wei Wuxian says himself that he doesn’t consider Jin Guangyao a villain.

However, I hesitate to say that had they struck up a friendship, Jin Guangyao and Wei Wuxian could have understood each other easily and that this could have changed things. Don’t get me wrong! I can definitely see how influence could have been made where a friendship between these two would have fixed it all. Or at least improved things. Especially in association with Wei Wuxian, Jiang Yanli’s nonjudgemental kindness (under the condition that nobody hurts her little brothers) would have been extremely refreshing to Meng Yao.

But I also think the differences between Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao would have made it difficult for them to truly understand and agree with each other. And it’s these differences that ultimately decide each of their fates.

I will try to organize my thoughts on this. First, the discussion of privilege.

1. Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao are not on the same privilege level.

While both Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao are scorned in some way, shape, or form for their parents’ statuses, Wei Wuxian is still the son of cultivators. He is still the son of Cangse sanren, a disciple of a famed immortal. His pedigree and legacy are undeniable. Jin Guangyao, on the other hand, is the unwanted son of a lecherous sect leader and a sex worker. In a society where hierarchy and reputation is everything, this places Jin Guangyao in an entirely different pedigree in a way that Wei Wuxian wouldn’t be able to understand.

Wei Wuxian is also brought into the Jiang sect and given a chance to cultivate at an early age where Jin Guangyao doesn’t. Wei Wuxian can punch the heir of a rich sect leader, leading to the dissolution of his sister’s political marriage alliance, and still get nothing but a slap on the wrist because boys will be boys. He can interrupt important post-war celebration dinners to tell that same rich sect leader to fuck off with his marriage proposal and then promptly skip away without any real consequences. He can accidentally send his friend’s little brother into a murderous rampage, and his own little brother will apologize on his behalf and offer to pay reparations.

Wei Wuxian may not have the same privilege as sect heirs like Jiang Cheng or Lan Wangji, but he has far more privilege than Jin Guangyao and Su She. This is important because it is this privilege that Wei Wuxian sacrifices later in order to the protect the Wens. I am not saying Wei Wuxian doesn’t suffer. He does, a truly horrendous amount, but even without his golden core, even when his self-worth is at an all-time low, he is still supported and protected by his status in the Jiang sect until he gives it up to do the right thing. Despite Lan Xichen and the Nies, Jin Guangyao doesn’t have this same kind of backing.

(With that being said though, Jin Guangyao does become Chief Cultivator, so there is only so far one can fall back on their disadvantages in society when they have already reached the top. Being marginalized is not an excuse to be a jackass to your nephew whose parents you had a hand in killing, just saying.)

One can argue that had Jin Guangyao been raised in the Jiang sect while Wei Wuxian continued to scrape for food on the streets, their outlook on life would have been completely different. But even taking into account Jiang Yanli’s overwhelmingly positive influence on a young Meng Yao, I am still inclined to disagree because of my next point.

2. Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao are fundamentally different in how they respond/cope with public gossip and ridicule.

Wei Wuxian, for the most part, lets these comments roll off his back. This is not to say he doesn’t care or that they don’t affect him. They clearly do, and his actions, his self-perception, and his increasingly arrogant bravado as the story progresses reflect the deluge of verbal abuse he’s face with, largely at the hands of Madam Yu. But he copes by being loud, by being talented, by becoming even more outrageous and more unorthodox the more people criticize him. So what if people don’t approve? So what if people look down on his father and gossip about his mother’s supposed relationship with Jiang Fengmian? As long as he is true to himself and his moral convictions, he can walk this dark single plank road alone and without regrets.

Jin Guangyao, on the other hand, desperately and reverently wants to be included. He wants to be accepted, to be liked. He wants to be in the room where it happens. He takes every single comment to heart, carries every disdainful remark on his back like an open scar. He is both someone who loves and respect his mother and who hates her for the constant shadow she casts over him and his place in society. He will build a Guanyin statue in her likeness, in her honor. He will wear a hat because she once told him that a gentleman always wears hats. And yet, he will spend everyday of his life trying to rid himself of his connection to her.

Where Wei Wuxian recklessly cares too little about appearances and what people think of him, Jin Guangyao cares far too much. Wei Wuxian doesn’t give one flying iota about politics, about status and acclaim. He was perfectly fine with being a lotus farmer on a mountain. Even if Wei Wuxian had never been taken in by the Jiangs (and managed to survive the streets), I genuinely think he would still have been largely the same – a child who is kind, open, curious, and holds few grudges. I am not sure I can say that even under the best circumstances, Jin Guangyao wouldn’t have . It destroys him. .

This ties into my last point.

3. Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao have completely opposing priorities and beliefs on the worth of others.

Wei Wuxian will throw himself in front of anybody if his moral compass tells him it is the right thing to do. He is a genuinely open-hearted person who cares deeply about others and thinks it is morally corrupt to do nothing when something can be done. He is idealistic and optimistic, oftentimes to a fault. Jin Guangyao, as a result of his childhood and circumstances, is incredibly pessimistic and cynical. It is every person for themselves out here. The world is a crooked shitshow, conflict is inevitable, and he has to come out on top no matter what.

This leads to him sacrificing pretty much everyone in his life in order to maintain his own reputation. Like I do genuinely think Jin Guangyao truly cared about Jin Ling! I think he also in his own way cared about Lan Xichen, Nie Mingjue, and Nie Huaisang! But I also think a large portion of that is because he enjoyed how they made him feel. He enjoyed being liked and being depended upon. And we see clearly what happens when those benefits cease. Whereas Wei Wuxian would rather throw himself off a cliff than hurt any more people he loves, Jin Guangyao would rather push his own people off the cliff if it means his reputation and appearance remain intact. And if that’s not possible, he would rather set them on fire along with him.

This has become an entirely too long rambling essay to say that while Wei Wuxian and Jin Guangyao share similar experiences, their primary priorities are so different and opposing that it is hard for me to come up with a way in which a friendship between them could have changed things. Sure, Jin Guangyao could have benefited from Wei Wuxian’s unabashed and staunch defense of his friend. Anyone who talks shit about Jin Guangyao’s mother will get punched in the face, and it would maybe have made Jin Guangyao feel less alone in the world, less like he only had himself and his manipulative ways to seek acceptance.

But what happens when Wei Wuxian being Wei Wuxian runs around causing social and political uproar to do what he thinks is right? Is Jin Guangyao going to help and support him, or is he going to throw Wei Wuxian under the bus to protect his own reputation? Personally, I think the importance he places on public perception would ultimately be too great. It destroys his relationships, and it destroys him.

[i-like-plan-m]

If youre still taking prompts!! Someone releases the diary of the yiling patriarch to the masses, and it becomes something like a diary of anne frank equivalent. Opinions are changed.

Instead of being oblivious about his feelings, wwx knows that he likes lwj but never does anything about it bc he’s accepted that lwj will never like him back or that he’ll never be good enough to for him. (more in next ch!)

[Posted to Ao3: weariness follows, and the infinite ache] 

Necessity, they said, was the mother of invention. 

Nie Huaisang disagreed. Genius was the root of invention, and his friend had been proof of that. Necessity was the mother of revenge. Of retribution. 

Da-ge would have said justice. 

Da-ge was not here anymore. 

Nie Huaisang was all alone now, left with nothing but a role that had been meant for great men like his father and brother. 

His father, assassinated by a man so evil he’d barely been human by the end of the war.  

His brother, murdered by a monster of a different making. One they’d trusted, let into their home and treated like family. One who still smiled at Nie Huaisang and thought him too blind to see the looming, broad-shouldered shadow that stalked its killer’s steps. 

His brother’s spirit always felt closest when Jin Guangyao was near. Even death could not stop Nie Mingjue’s overprotective hovering, it seemed. Somehow that hurt worse. 

Necessity was the mother of revenge and genius the root of invention, whether that meant talismans or planning the downfall of a monster. Nie Huaisang was not a genius. 

But Wei Wuxian had been. Before his own brutal death, anyway. Even when sequestered away in a place of nightmares, he’d been constantly creating. 

Creating, and inventing, and filling dozens of notebooks with his usual disorganized ramblings. The notebooks had been seized by the Jins after the siege of the Burial Mounds. They didn’t notice when a handful went missing from their stores, snuck out of Lanling by a resentful servant with light fingers and a grudge against Jin Guangyao. He’d been easily bought off by a stranger in the city who’d never shown his face. 

“He really was a genius,” Nie Huaisang mused, flipping through one of his dead friend’s journals in the solitude of his own personal library. 

A scoff. “Demonic cultivation is demonic cultivation.” 

“Not all of it is demonic,” he argued. “Just parts of it.” 

He looked at the contents and reconsidered. “Actually, most of it is about farming and child raising and Lan Wangji. No wonder the Jins were so pissed.” Their treasure had turned out to be worthless, after all. 

This particular journal of Wei Wuxian’s had six pages straight of complaints about Wen Qing bullying him into sleeping and eating. Lan Wangji was mentioned no less than eighty seven times. There were rabbits and a child planted next to radishes and dozens of lotus roots doodled all over the pages. A few lines of writing had been lazily scratched out-- by the looks of it, Wei Wuxian had started writing all his characters upside down and backwards. It was right before the whining about Wen Qing stabbing him to make him sleep, which suddenly made a lot more sense. 

Nie Huaisang now owned eight of Wei Wuxian’s journals, relics of a young man who’d thrown his own life away for Wens, of all things. No surprise. He’d always had his own sense of justice. 

“Justice?” His brother’s voice was full of incredulous disbelief. “A-Sang, he killed thousands.” 

Nie Huaisang’s mouth twisted stubbornly. “They attacked him first,” he muttered. 

“Oh, that’s what you’re going with? ‘They started it’?” 

“Well, they did.” 

The only response was Nie Mingjue grumbling under his breath. The familiarity of it made Nie Huaisang smile, but it was the contents of the next page that made him laugh aloud. 

I don’t know why I keep wishing Lan Zhan was here. He’d hate this place. Just think: all the resentful energy everywhere, and Hanguang-Jun farming with the rest of us! Haha can you imagine? 

Ah. Trouble is, I can imagine. He was my soulmate. Or at least I thought so.

> That’s gay. 

Wen Qing!! Stop it!! Get your own journal!! 

> You left it open on top of my medicines. You are clearly at fault. 

You--!! I didn’t leave it there, I dropped it there when you STABBED ME with your damned needles!

> Don’t get all defensive just because I saw your love letters to Lan Wangji. 

LOVE LETTERS?! You are the WORST, and I can’t believe-- wait, why am I writing this when I can just come yell at you instead?

> I dare you :) 

(Don’t do it, Wei-gongzi!)

WEN NING, YOU TOO?! BETRAYAL ON ALL SIDES

“At least he had them, this time around,” Nie Huaisang said with a tired sigh. “What a terrible place to live.” 

“Stop sympathizing with the enemy.” 

“No,” Nie Huaisang said blithely. “Besides, he’s not the enemy. He’s dead.” For now.

“What do you mean, for now?” Nie Mingjue asked warily. 

“Just some thoughts, da-ge, nothing to worry about.” He subtly tucked another journal under his cushion so it was out of sight. That one had been far more illuminating. Something for later-- for the beginning of the endgame. 

A long silence while he read, and then... “You haven’t painted anything in months.” 

“I’m too busy for those things.” 

“You love those things.” 

“I love you more.” Nie Huaisang paused, staring hard at the blurry page in front of him. “There’s no joy in anything anymore.” 

“That can’t be true.” 

“It is,” he snapped, abruptly furious. “How can I care about painting when you’re dead? How can I remember what happiness is when I’m all alone?”

“You aren’t all alone.” 

“You are dead!” Nie Huaisang screamed, flinging the journal aside and shooting to his feet. His face was wet and his breath trembling, tears burning in his throat. “You left me. You are gone, and now I have no one. Not a single soul left in this god forsaken world; no one cares about me! I’m left with no family but your sworn brothers-- one who killed you, and the other who handed him the weapon to do it!” He whirled around to throw his brush against the wall, leaving a smear of black ink. “You are dead, and I am not, and there’s nothing I can do about it except kill the man who killed you.”

Silence. And then… 

“S-Sect Leader?” A hesitant knock at the door. “Are you alright? Who are you talking to?” 

Nie Huaisang swiped his eyes clear of tears and found an empty room. His heart lurched as reality returned. As the pain and grief and despair found him again.

“Just to myself, I guess,” he said distantly, unable to tear his eyes away from the place he’d imagined his brother to be. A ghost or a memory, he didn’t know. It didn’t matter either way. His brother was gone. 

“I’m fine. Leave me.” 

“Yes, Sect Leader.” Soft footsteps leading away, and then he was left with ringing silence and a hollow room. 

“He’s gone,” Nie Huaisang repeated shakily. A reminder he needed, as much as it hurt to say aloud.  “Da-ge is dead.” 

He stared into the candle’s flame until his eyes burned. His brother was dead and he was alone. There was little he could do about it… except get revenge for his brother’s soul. 

Nie Huaisang was not a genius. He was something better, something that would make his complex plans succeed: he was Nie Mingjue’s beloved little brother, whom no one considered a threat. They would never see him coming, would never realize his role or ruthlessness until his revenge was complete. 

Jin Guangyao would die for his crimes. Nie Huaisang would make sure of it. 

He sat back down. Took a breath before digging out the most important journal, and started taking notes. Nie Huaisang plotted with meticulous care long into the night, until his eyes drifted shut against his will. He staggered to his bed, sleep-drunk and heartsore, and collapsed onto it, too numb to bother dragging the blankets up the bed. 

He was on the verge of sleep when the blankets draped gently over his body. “Thank you, da-ge,” he said sleepily, and drifted off as a hand brushed the hair from his face with utmost care. 

[angstymdzsthoughts]

Sent by the very wonder @catmaid-san

ForeverSadJYL1.--- "A-Xian...Since I was a child, mom has said that the young master of Jin Clan will be my husband. Although we only met a few times, Young master Jin is radiant and handsome. Few girls will be unimpressed, I guess. I do wish to be together with Jin Zixuan till old and grey. But if our feelings are not mutual..."--------- It was tale as old as time. Of a gallant, handsome, and charming prince. With the ordinary and plain girl. Jiang Yanli once had fall in love with Jin Zixuan...

ForeverSadJYL2.--- Even when the Young Master of Jin Clan always saw him with distaste and dissatisfy in his eyes, She always smiled and continued liking him, because for young girls, handsome and prince-like boys in the kind of JZX was hard to ignore. Her heart can't help but fluttered everytime she thought that the handsome guy will become her husband in the future. And it was also something her mother always made her believed, that she and JZX will eventually marry.

ForeverSadJYL3.--- No matter how her chest tighthened in pain whenever she realized she had no worth in the eyes of JZX, no matter how she always wanted to cry whenever he snorted and looked forced in their so called little date, no matter how he always dismiss any attempt at conversation she make when they were made to know each other's more. No matter of it all, JYL always smiled and believed in her mother's words that it was all his teenage's temper, and JZX would be changed once they marry

ForeverSadJYL4.--- But....But....But! Years of always doing her best. Years of always being dismissed. Years of heart being broken. Years of always feeling unworthy. Which maiden whose heart not bled and tears not drained? JYL was not an exception. She might have smile in front of many insulting and underestimating stares. But did everyone actually forget that JYL was just a girl barely reached her twenties? Her first step in romance basically taught her that a plain girl is worth of no romance.

ForeverSadJYL5.--- She began to wonder , was it her fault that JZX was so dazzling, while she herself was so plain? was it her fault that JZX had so many talents and things to be praised, while she herself not even knowing which of her side was worth to be proud of? All of those wondering eventually reached to, "Was this engagement a mistake to begin with?" --------- And all of her feelings came into a new realization when her shidi, WWX, brawled with JZX and broke the engagement in result.

ForeverSadJYL6.--- "A-Xian...You must have started the fight because he said something, right? Silly, i watched you grow, i know everything about you. You wouldn't have started a fight for a reason simply like he was annoying"------------ "...after i think it over, Actually I....I'm not into Young Master Jin. A-Xian...You did nothing wrong. Though Young Master Jin is attractive, I still want to seek my true love. Heart to heart, till the end." ---------- is a new resolve JYL made that night.

ForeverSadJYL7.--- More than a decade of heartache, and JZX still didn't change, Jiang Yanli knew which fight she should keep on fighting, and which one she should just gave up. If the engagement wasn't meant to be, then so be it. If anything, her heart swelled up and there's a warm feeling bubbled inside her when she knew WWX defended her honour even when he knew it'd sullied his instead. Seeing him didn't even make an excuse when Madam Yu berated him, make her feel she was still "worth it"...

ForeverSadJYL8--- JZX couldn't appreciate her no matter how hard she tried. While WWX he was bragging and praising her at every hour even at the smallest matter. He said, she was the best and she was the prettiest of all. Before, she fell to JZX because of his prince-like self and her daydream of being swooped off her feet by a handsome prince. Now,JYL realized that when her prince didn't come with his carriage, there's still a knight in shining armor with a donkey(LMAO, can't help but trolling)

ForeverSadJYL9.--- WWX was her knight in shining armor for JYL. He was always ready to protect her, to defend her every bit, and put her on a pedestal. The child before her grew up to be an upstanding, strong and honorable young men, and JYL couldn't help but see him in the way woman see a men. JYL could only hope that with her betrothal now severed, and as WWX grew up and proved his worth even more, perhaps...she could hope for a chance that her parent somehow see him as a noteworthy suitor..

ForeverSadJYL10.--- BUT! Life is a bitch! Hope is the cruelest thing ever. As the fire raged and swallowed everything his sect ever had, it also blazed the hopes JYL had in life. Her parent was dead. Her brother fought alone, and WWX was missing God knew where. JYL wondered if there's anything crueler that fates prepared for her...But she must stand her ground and stay strong. Her brother needed her. And she could dismiss her personal feelings to continue being emotional support for her brother.

ForeverSadJYL11.--- When WWX finally appeared again, she was relieved beyond belief. There's still limit where she could smile and smile and encourage others without another person who did the same for her. JC is her brother, he was a good boy, but he's bad with his words and he's not good with affection. WWX was someone JYL had as her oasis with his ever so bright and returning smiles and all of his showering affections. It was hard for his presence not to be yearned when he was gone.

ForeverSadJYL12.--- WWX returned, but his smiles didn't return with him. Everyone might have not notice, even JC didn't notice, with his laughter and smiles WWX still plastered on his face. But JYL knew. She knew everything about him after all. She knew it was strenuous. She knew his outwards laugh didn't feel genuine at all. He was changed. But which people who didn't change in this raging war? But at least she knew that his smiles when he finally met her again was warm and full of relieves...

ForeverSadJYL13.--- JYL knew that WWX liked her lotus roots and pork rib soup...Not because of an amazing recipes. She knew because it was something that reminded him of home...the taste that reminded him he had a place he belonged to. And JYL would be glad to cook it over and over again if it could reassure him he still had people who loved him and would be there for him. The incident with JZX was something she didn't predicted to be honest. Though, it made JYL deepened her feelings towards WWX

ForeverSadJYL14.--- It was the Jins who helped her when Lotus Pier fall, so JYL just wanted to express her gratitude by always sparing JZX of her cooking. It was not unexpecte that JZX accused her of lying and stealing other's efforts, she didn't feel surprised that JZX even dared to insult her in public, without even trying to find the truth at all. She was, after all, not worthy of anything to the Young Master of Jin Clan. Though she knew it all, it's still hard to keep her tears from falling.

ForeverSadJYL15.--- It was all WWX again, always him, who defended her, who protected her from even a malicious remarks. He didn't hesitate to throw a punch and berated JZX, even at the chance of YMJ lost an ally to the war. Honestly...just how many times WWX did proved her again that she was worthy, more than she ever thought. It's hard not to love someone like him. JYL just wanted for the war to end, their life returned to normal, She,with her brother, and the men she loved with all her heart.

ForeverSadJYL16.--- But! Did she somehow forget that hopes were the cruelest thing? The war ended, and yet their life didn't return to normal. WWX was praised for a hero in a battlefield. But he was a mere madman in time of peace. And she knew that WWX understand it himself. JC was struggling with building a sect. If building a sect was just literally built the building, perhaps it'd be much easier, but it was not. With Madam Jin back again to shove her on JZX's arms, she knew she had it coming.catmaid-san

ForeverSadJYL17---JYL knew she couldn't help JC in anything. The only thing she could offer was by securing an ally to Jin Sect with marriage. She let it happened. Madam Jin blatant matchmaking, JZX's insufferable presence, she'd bear it all for her brother...even when it include sacrificing her love towards WWX. In all honesty, when WWX once asked her "how do you know you like someone", JYL wanted so badly to answer "the feelings i feel with you right now is how i know i love someone so dearly"

ForeverSadJYL18.--- WWX left Lotus Pier. She always knew with how tense the situation surrounding WWX post-war, it'd be the matter of time for WWX to break it and left the cultivation world. JYL knew and she understand it. WWX was always like that. He helped others in need no matter he went, and erected justice he believed. It was after all one of the thing she loved in WWX. If life must go on then let it be, let them walked their only choice path in life, and search for happiness along the way.

ForeverSadJYL19.--- And yet, she can't help but wanting to visit him, to show him her wedding dress. It was all a wistful thinking. Of wanting WWX to see her in a wedding attires no matter what. She once dreamed to marry JZX and live as a princess-like. But a dream was only a dream. The one thing she wished more sincerely in her life was to marry WWX and be loved forever. JYL wanted to be selfish one more time. She wanted him to see her as a bride and wanted him to praise her as a pretty bride..

ForeverSadJYL20.--- Life went on. For the n-th time JYL's wishes to be finally happy wasn't granted. JZX died. It was said WWX who killed him. She grieved for a man, though not the one she loved, but at least for the father of her child who had tried his best to mend his mistakes in the past. She knew WWX wouldn't touch JZX without any provoking attempt. But even when she believed WWX, for her beloved wasn't what people think at all. Still, life is a bitch. People already cried for his death...

ForeverSadJYL21.--- "A-Xian...before, why did you run? I wanted to tell you...,"--------------------------------------------JYL once wondered if fates had ever smiled at her. She once wondered if things could be crueler than she already had. She was wrong. Apparently fates had unlimited cruelty reserved for her. Before she knew it, her body already moved and protected WWX from looming death. WWX always proved her that she was worth it. And for once JYL wanted to show him he was also worth it...

[pastthevaulteddoors]

It’s not Wednesday... but I don’t care. Here’s a little bit of If-WWX-was-raised-by-the-Wens story.

“I still find it hard to believe that you stood up to your father like that.”

The Unclean Realm had nothing on Lotus Pier’s scenery or Cloud Recesses’ serenity, but it definitely gave Wei Wuxian a sense of security with its sturdy walls and many guards posted along the parapets. Although he felt that if he started flashing his unorthodox talismans those many blades would turn inwards on him.

Jin Zixuan shook his head, shame clear on his face. “It was the only decision I could make,” he began. “I couldn’t sit back and watch Qishan Wen tear apart our livelihood.”

Nie Mingjue sat at the head of the hall, his blade safely kept to his side. Wei Wuxian noticed how Meng Yao moved from his usual right hand post to stand at Sect Leader Nie’s left, closer to where his brother sat. Jiang Cheng’s fists were clenched tightly over his knees and Nie Huaisang looked among his friends with wide, worried eyes.

“Thus far, the Wens have been unable to establish their supervisory offices within Qinghe’s territory. We can spare a few troops to assist you in Langya,” Nie Mingjue stated.

“That would make a world of difference,” Jin Zixuan said. “Qin Changye is wavering on his jurisdiction and continues to cower under my father’s influence. Laoling Qin Sect might not stand for much longer, if they haven’t already fled to Carp Tower.”

Sect Leader Nie slammed his fist on top of his table, rage clear in his brown eyes. “Lanling Jin Sect is sitting, waiting to see who wins before they pick a side. Are they going to sit in their tower and watch the rest of us burn?!”

Jin Zixuan frowned. “Qin Changye’s daughter, Qin Su, was a helpful voice on pushing the sect to fight, but her cultivation is low and has already gone into hiding with her mother. Assuming they join in with Lanling Jin Sect, we might have a voice among the populace.”

“This is ridiculous!” Jiang Cheng scowled. “The Wens are slaughtering our people and raising them again for their corpse army. They’re not even sacrificing their people to devour our freedom, but using bodies as puppets and shields.”

Wei Wuxian looked down at his full tea cup. It was difficult to get him down, but he couldn’t escape his hand in this disaster. “It wasn’t supposed to be this way,” he said eventually. “It was… they were supposed to overwhelm the sects into submission, not murder everyone.”

“You’re young and not a war strategist. It’s not at all surprising for you to be deceived by human nature’s darker side,” Meng Yao said diplomatically.

“What you can do now is use your skills to undo the mess your talents created,” Nie Mingjue followed up to Meng Yao’s comment, although he did not sound as soothing as his Vice Envoy.

“Don’t blame this all on him,” Jiang Cheng said. “Qishan Wen would have attacked regardless. Wen Qing warned us of a pending plot.”

Wei Wuxian had to admire Jiang Cheng’s bravery to talk back to Sect Leader Nie and not back down to the glower directed his way. He certainly didn’t get his balls for his dad!

“What’s done is done,” Jin Zixuan injected. “What we need to do now is figure out how to disable Wen Rouhan’s power.”

“The Unclean Realm is not out of hot water yet,” Wei Wuxian said. “Do you know about the Yin Irons?”

A flash of confusion crossed Nie Mingjue’s eyes. “No.”

“I’m not surprised,” Wei Wuxian went on. “Each major sect has housed a Yin Iron for several centuries and the information was forcefully buried to hide them. It provides a subtle pulse of protection and growth of cultivation, which is why the five have been able to remain firmly stable for as long as they have.”

Nei MingJue frowned at him but did not interrupt. Wei Wuxian stood then, and stretched with his new spotlight. “Do you really think your warriors are strong from blade cultivation alone? No, of course not!”

“Wei Wuxian, do not insult our practices!”

“Not insulting, but I’m coming around to a point!” Wei Wuxian began to pace. “The Yin Irons used to be one, and so Wen Rouhan has been gathering them to bend resentful energy of core-hosted corpses. They’re stronger than resentful corpses, if you haven’t noticed.”

He suddenly turned and held up a hand. “He already has two. His own from Qishan and,” he lowered his fingers as he counted them off. “The Yunmeng’s Iron is likely in his possession now. I had a moment of it’s control, but…” he lowered his counting hand and gave a short look to Jiang Cheng.

“Then where are the other?” Nie Huaisang asked.

“One is here, somewhere,” Wei Wuxian waved a hand wide. “And one is in Lanling, likely controlled by the Jin Sect. But with how close Sect Leader Wen and Sect Leader Jin are, I doubt I is a buried secret and being used as a negotiation tool.”

“I have not heard of any Yin Iron in Lanling,” Jin Zixuan stated.

“You weren’t supposed to. No one really was,” Wei Wuxian scratched his cheek with in index finger, looking to play this off as a poor joke. “I may have found it through my research, then confirmed such things at Cloud Recesses.”

Nei Mingjue didn’t look pleased. Who would with new information? “And what would you have us do about it? We’re fighting a war. We don’t have time to play detective and puzzle this out.”

“That’s… ah, kind of important to the puzzle of winning,” Wei Wuxian stopped pacing. “I don’t know the details, but I know the gathering of the Yin Iron will result in a weapon. No one will be safe.”

“What weapon? What does it do? What defenses can we put into place.”

“That’s… just it. I… don’t know,” Wie Wuxian winced at Nie Mingjue’s terrifying expression.

“Then what use are your assumptions?” Sect Leader Nie’s voice boomed through the hall and felt like a hard punch to the stomach. “We can’t rely on these magic artifacts that we don’t even know if they exist. What we need to do,” Nie Mingjue slammed his fist once more against the table and a cracking sound could be heard. Baxia shivered with murderous glee in her stand. “Is start pushing them back and raze all the Wens until they are nothing but a bad memory.”

“If I just had a little time to research—”

“We don’t have time!” Nie Mingjue hollered, and somewhere in the ringing of his voice, Nie Huasang pleaded with, “Brother.”

“Wei Wuxian, he’s right,” Jiang Cheng spoke up finally. His chest was out, feeling the comradery to agree with a sect leader in his father’s place. “We have to act now. Every day they kill and raise our cultivators while losing none of their own if only through their resurrection. We need to focus on the fight.”

“But if we could find the Iron we could disable his ability,” Wei Wuxian began.

Nie Mingjue looked ready to bellow yet again and another of Nie Huasang’s pleas were lost when the chamber door shyly pushed open.

“We’re in the middle of a meeting!” Sect Leader Nie finally did bellow, making the courier shiver in fright.

“A- apologies, Sect Leader, but there’s urgent news.” The courier didn’t dare enter further than the threshold. Luckily, Meng Yao sprang into action and swept through the hall to accept the poor bowing man’s missive. “Thank you,” he said softly and dismissed him.

When Meng Yao turned he held two scroll with a darkened expression. “It’s from First Young Master Lan,” he said the name formally before he rushed back to the dais. A collected intake of breath came from the room of young men. No one had heard from Lan Xichen in months. It was a horrible oversight to not look in on one’s allies, but they never called out for help, nor did they stand down. All anyone knew was that the Wens burned the mountain and was followed by an eerie, frightening silence.

Nie Mingjue unrolled one of the scrolls given to him by his Vice Envoy, the second, Meng Yao unrolled himself. The two read in silence for a few minutes with matching stoic and pained expressions, then slowly resolve.

Meng Yao couldn’t seem to shake himself from the words, but when Nie Mingjue set the missive down, appearing grave. “Xichen is the now Sect Leader Lan after the death of his father,” he informed the group. Wei Wuxian didn’t realize he was wavering on his feet until a hand reached out and pulled him down by the wrist. Nie Huasang shuffled so they could share a cushion.

“And the others?” Jin Zuxian barked.

“When the Wens attacked, the surviving Lan Sect was forced into hiding in the back mountains. Some magically protected barrier is there,” Meng Yao spoke when Nie Mingjue did not continue. There was a catch in his voice as he tried hard to reign in his emotions. “But they were smoked out this past month.”

“And Lan Zhan?” Wei Wuxian couldn’t help but interrupt, his nerves on edge for news of the man he.. he…

“Taken by the Wens as compensation for the delay of handing over their Yin Iron,” Meng Yao said tightly. “Which is also now in their possession. Cloud Recesses, or what remains, has been forcefully turned into Gusu’s first cultivation office.”

Jiang Cheng cussed under his breath, and Jin Zuxian smacked a fist onto his low table. Wei Wuxian felt dizzy, and if Nie Huasang had not put his hands on him he surely would have fallen over.

Wei Wuxian never felt so guilty for what he had aimed the Wen Sect to do until this very moment. Once, he was giddy with the thought of inviting Lan Wangji to his Sect, to show off the patchy hills where he and Wen Ning went hunting, or showed him all his projects and experiments in his workshop. Surely he would have been able to impress the peerless Lan Wangji with his intelligence and cunning, but not like this. Not as a prisoner.

Suddenly filled with adrenaline, Wei Wuxian jumped to his feet, throwing off his friend, and bowed very low. “Sect Leader Nie,” he began in an impassioned rush. “Let me return to Qinghe. Sect Leader Wen might not know of my defection, he might not know what I did at Lotus Pier. Please, let me try to get the Irons out of his grip and rescue Lan Zhan.”

“Out of the question,” Nei Mingjue’s answer was swift as a butcher’s knife. “You can’t go gallivanting across the countryside to rescue your schoolyard crush when we need you here to paint your arrays.”

Jin Zuxian was next on his feet, bowing as well. “With all due respect, he is our friend and we should not abandon him.”

“Sect Leader Nie,” Jaing Cheng was up next, bowing for permission. “We need strong forces, and Lan Wangji is as strong as they get.”

Nie Huasang was next to his feet. “Brother, I—”

“Not another word!” Nie Mingjue slammed his fist onto the table. It finally cracked down the middle but did not break entirely. “Listen to yourself! You are heirs to your sects. We have people to protect. Your responsibilities lie with them. One man will never rise above the strength of your sects.

“In an hour we’ll begin a new campaign. Jiang Cheng, Jin Zuxian, I expect you to be there was heads of your sects while your fathers are unable to represent them. Wei Wuxian,” he pointed an angry finger at the boy. “Resume working on your arrays.”

“Brother—”

“Huasang, make sure the Jins are hosted properly,” Nie Mingjue stood suddenly, concluding the end of their discussion. “No more talk of a rescue mission.”

[a-very-fond-farewell]

The forbidden crack! Untamed prompts: 24/?

Role-reversed!AU (Song[Xiao]Xue): “Love at First Sight”

[villain!SL/investigator!XY]

[title is from a Kylie Minogue’ song and from nowhere else fight me]

[so. me is embarrassed to say this but. the idea comes from an Italian movie of the late 90’s.]

[which is to say that: (1) Italian comedies are rarely my thing bc they are (pardon my French, I don’t feel like switch to Italian rn) problematique most of the times; (2) it’s been 10 or so years since I last saw this particular movie and even if at the time I liked it I was probably sixteen at the time so... not the best judge also my memory is shit for actual plot points; (3) internalized homophobia runs in the Italian film industry; (4) it deals with criminal gangs and, even if the movie makes fun of them, it is still a sore topic in my country so... I’m not gonna go in detail for this ficlet. it is, in fact, just a prompt; (5) also there is a cop character and... well, I changed it into a private investigator bc fuck it; (6) ignore me, I’m emotional tonight.]

*

Married off. Him. To a lovely girl, for sure, but with a penchant for pickpocketing and letting her mouth run at the most inconvenient of times. The wedding is in six months. Song Lan has to laugh at that.

But Mother has been almost too complacent with him for the longest time, allowing him to play his games and get it on with too many women for him to care to keep track of. He may or may not have disrespected some of them and their powerful families in the past for being a serial womanizer. There’s a logic behind it, of course, but since his eye surgery he cannot seem to remember what that could have possibly been at the time.

The worst of all being that he doesn’t remember why he ever found women attractive in the first place. People of the Baixue Clan tried to cheer him up to no avail for months. They took him to brothels, called in his favorite rent-girls, tipped them extra, brought him out of town on vacation to distract him, but... nothing.

He feels like crying sometimes. He’s done. Broken. Nobody will ever take him seriously anymore now that he’s nothing but his mommy’s boy. Forget for a minute that his mother is keeping the entire Yi City in check by enforcing her law on other clans. Let alone that her word has ruled over rascals and rogue hotheads for decades just by letting them hear her name. BaoShan Sanren would have not forgiven him for turning down the daughter of a competing family, that’s for sure.

Sometimes Song Lan looks down at himself, dressed in ridiculously flashy buttondowns open at the collar, with black jackets and fitting trousers, embezzled shoes on his long feet... and he wants to shriek. He hates everything about himself and he doesn’t know where to start. He doesn’t recognize himself anymore, almost as if his mind had changed about everything he believed to know.

At least he can see again. That should be enough, right?

*

It should have seen it fucking coming, Xue Yang knows this much.

A bullet to the heart would have hurt him less, but it’s been a year since his husband’s death and he’s done. He’s fucking done. Throwing himself away like that, recklessly accepting new cases one after the other just because. He’s got nothing to come home for anyway.

But as he disinfects the slash of a dagger on his shoulder, he wonders if there’s more to life than this. A dirty bathroom where he and his husband used to shave in the morning together before work. A stuffy apartment filled with unwanted memories. Mold on the ceiling, laughter rising to the sky every night before Xiao XingChen died. Before everything else left with him.

Xue Yang flinches when the alcohol stings badly on the cut and he chugs some vodka down for good measure as he prepares to stitch the gaping wound back together. The flame scorches the needle until it becomes almost white and he wonders, not for the first time, how it would feel to just... stop. He cried so much he doesn’t have tears left anymore.

The last time he saw his husband’s beautiful face it was at the morgue, where a dispassionate woman in white had asked him to confirm his identity. She asked him if he had formally agreed to put his husband’s name on the list of organ donors. He refused in the beginning... and then thought about it. About what his righteous husband would have wanted him to do.

Letting go of him –of any part of him, really– so soon tore him apart.

Since there was nothing left of Xiao XingChen, it was just right for not a single thing of Xue Yang to be left in his wake as well.

Well, aside from the pain. But that was to be expected after all.

He had never deserved anything but pain in his life.

Fuck that. Fuck that shit.

*

Mother asked him to look for a mole in the group, but he found a mere nobody snooping around in their area instead. Searching for what, he doesn’t know. But, as he crowds the other man in a dark alley behind the secret entry of their club, Song Lan cannot help himself from staring.

The laundromat from where their regular patrons usually enter to play is open 24/7, the flickering light coming from its open door casting just... the loveliest shadows on the younger man’s face. He’s shorter, much shorter than him. Possibly in his early thirties. Dressed nicely with a gun pointed at Song Lan... but he doesn’t care.

It’s almost as if something has fallen back in its original place and Song Lan is filled with elation. He has never felt more relieved or happy in his life. It feels like a second chance at life, an opportunity he doesn’t want to let slide through his fingers this time around.

He grasps the other man’s hand holding the gun and directs it upwards in a swift move. A bullet cuts through the air as he pushes the shorter man up to the laundromat window, neon lights dancing on Song Lan’s face. Soon people from the club will rush to his aid, knowing full well that he’s out looking for a snitch. He doesn’t have time, so he takes a good look at the person at his mercy.

He knows him.

And he falls in love, immediately.

*

The shot still rings in his ear, the gun burning in his outstretched hand, now caught in a vicious grasp. Xue Yang flinches as he looks up and gets ready to defend himself. He was just following a useless son of a bitch lying to his wife about not playing cards and losing all of their money. He would have never thought it would turn so bad so soon. Usually he gets away quickly enough, running for his life as usual...

...but this is different.

His gaze meets Xiao XingChen’s eyes and he freezes on the spot. He would recognize them anywhere, the same glassy quality to them, the same softness around them. Nothing makes sense anymore.

Because the one in front of him looks nothing like his husband.

And yet he knows him.

He knows what it feels to be looked with fondness and longing by one Xiao XingChen.

Fuck, he missed that.

He missed that so much.

*

[additional nonsense under the cut, bc. I am me]

[the original movie is a comedy, but I saw this post while I was writing the prompt and now it’s a fucking urban-noir kind of deal baby!]

[am I procrastinating another ficlet (slowly turning into a 20k monster bc I’m stupid) by writing this prompt instead? no. what are you talking about?]

[i wanted SL to have a family, but I had no idea what the people at the Temple would have looked like or acted around him, so I imagined BaoShan Sanren hoarding children as she goes (which is canon anyway) but she’s a villain in this bc I’m an asshole.]

[SL is the only one of her children to have an actual father, hence he’s the only one with a last name different from Sanren (which I know is a title but let. me. live. *kissy face* :* :* :* many thanks.]

[I offer Lan QiRen as a tribute for fatherhood, even if I know SL’s surname is written like “mist”, while the Lan Sect is named after the character for “blue”. but let me dream.]

[also I just like the idea of SL’s auntie or big sister being WWX’s mother for no other reason that this is a silly prompt and I need to fill these additional notes with something vaguely resembling a plot.]

[if you want another role-reversed!au check this other (wangxian) prompt of mine. then check all the others and have fun.]

[in the movie there was a scene where the widower runs on a horse to save the man he (begrudgingly) has come to care about from his wedding.]

[for the majority if not the entirety of the movie the widower sees something of his dead wife in the criminal (who received the wife’s eyes through transplant) and denies any attraction to him until the end... even if he runs away with him.]

[the criminal has changed since the transplant and became somewhat a decent person. in the end he runs away with the widower.]

[I wanted actual romance, not plausible deniability, thanks. hence this stupid prompt someone might like, maybe.]

[if you write something based on this prompt (the most angsty or hurt/comfort-y the better, but also fluff or *coughs*smut*coughs* is good) send me an ask. I want to read it! :D]

ok now I go back to my 20k-and-counting monster fic. bye!!