#other than it’s interesting to explore it outside of just the events of the play.

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

Smile And Be A Villain

queer character-driven historical fantasy, reimagining Hamlet before the events of the play

follows prince Hamlet who has been sent away to Wittenberg after being caught in a compromising position, meeting new people and discovering magic

and Ophelia, back in Denmark, dealing with the rise of the corrupting by-product of magic

while a war is brewing, and they have to figure out how much they are willing to sacrifice to save their country

duology

bi hamlet, aspec ophelia

[hattedhedgehog]

My (spoiler-free) thoughts on Dragon Age: The Veilguard

The review embargo has lifted and I can officially say that I've played through Dragon Age: The Veilguard early! 

Here are my spoiler-free thoughts and personal opinions on the overall gameplay experience: 

Narrative:

Rook's dialogue and decisions impact SO MUCH of the game, and come into play later on. From companions remembering your beverage preferences, to whether someone you spared shows up later to help or harm you, it feels like the game is paying attention and that you matter.

The stakes are unbelievably high. The Evanuris are utterly terrifying villains, in ways that Corypheus wasn’t. You really feel the magnitude of their power on a personal level as well as a worldwide level.

Whatever your thoughts on him, Solas is FUN as a character. He’s fun to talk to, fun to talk strategy with, fun to rile up and verbally spar with and fun to grudgingly ally with. Now that he can drop his former act and appear to you as the Dread Wolf, and you get to see his memories, you and he team get to decide how to utilise his knowledge and how far your trust extends.

The setup and payoff of the story beats are absolutely superb. The emotional turmoil as a player of being ensnared by things that was foreshadowed earlier in the game is utterly exquisite. Every thread of the larger tapestry has been woven with so much love by the writing team, and every character’s arc tie into the larger story in interesting ways.

The characters feel like they have full lives outside of the player character. You frequently go exploring their home turf and can meet their friends and family. They interact with each other on their own and move about the Lighthouse to spend time together, leave notes for each other, and talk about each other even when the other isn’t there. The team feels like they all really care about each other as well as you. 

You can tell what your approval rating is with characters, but if you want to romance them you have to put some thought into it. Interactions and world events besides the heart on the dialogue wheel influence their attraction to you.

Gameplay:

The combat is very engaging, and I enjoyed how unique all the enemies were.

Abilities in the skill tree can be refunded so you can redirect to a different specialization, which is really handy if you’re indecisive and overwhelmed at first (like I get when choosing abilities).  Most companions can get healing abilities no matter what class, so you don’t have to worry about balancing your rogues/mages/warriors (most of the time).

Climbing, balancing on ledges, using ziplines and sliding down slopes made environments feel more immersive. Additionally I like how each companion has unique abilities that let them interact with the world (fixing mechanisms, breathing fire, summoning bridges from the Fade, etc), and learning their abilities alongside them helps you grow closer.

The wayfinder light makes everything feel streamlined, so it's way harder to get lost while exploring an area. I hardly had to look at the mini map at all, and usually I’m glued to it! This meant I could actually look around at the beautiful environments and appreciate how lively they were, even without NPCs.

The upgrade system is far less overwhelming than in Inquisition; there are a finite amount of weapons/armour/accessories to be found, which are designed for each specific character like in DA:O and DA:2. There's also no longer crafting from scratch. If you loot an item you already have, it automatically upgrades the single item rather than giving you duplicates.

You know that frustration of coming across higher-level armour that just isn’t as flattering as your current one? Not to worry, you can collect “appearances” which you can toggle on as the visual for the armour while still retaining the benefits of the original.

I cannot stress enough how simple and easy to use the inventory is. It's heavenly. 

Using the shops of specific cities increases your reputation within those cities, which is a good incentive to explore and use the shops. I usually hate in-world shopping but here it was simple, and thinking about it tactically worked pretty well.

Quests sometimes reach a point where you can't continue at your current place in the story, and must return to in later acts. When re-exploring familiar areas, everything feeling big enough to be fresh with each visit, and new loot and codex entires appear.

Edit: something I forgot to mention. In character creator, you get to make your Inquisitor after you make Rook. The build menus are all the same, so manage your energy accordingly for doing it all again immediately after for your Inky. I spent an hour and a half building my Rook and wanted to get right to playing, and had to re-wire my brain a bit to be patient and keep going with the CC. (Seeing my Inquisitor with new graphics was awesome though).

A couple little things I appreciated:

The control sounds are very pleasing. From the whoosh of opening the combat wheel to the clinking of upgrades to the subtle whir of holding the decision button, they're a nice touch.

If companions are interrupted in conversation by combat, they resume it afterwards with a "what were you saying before?".

Photo mode is so fun to play with, and you can adjust blur/brightness/lens/depth within the scene. You can also toggle on and off the visibility of your Rook, your party, NPCs and enemies!

Assan learns new interaction tricks at the Lighthouse as the game goes on.

Nitpicks:

Overall I had an incredibly positive experience. The gripes I had were tiny things like:

I genuinely like the new art style of the game as a whole. However, the blurriness of some of the features in contrast with some elements being very crisp was distracting.

When trying to sell valuables for faction points without using Sell All, it takes quite a long time to count up all the individual sales, and it isn't a live counter. So it's kind of annoying if you get +3 points for each item you sell, need 150 points to get the next tier of items, and over 10K worth of valuables that you want to sell to other factions. 

If you do lots of quests without returning to the Lighthouse often, occasionally companions at the Lighthouse will have dialogue pertaining to the quests you've just finished as if you haven't done them.

You can pet the dogs and cats in the cities, but Rook turns their back to the camera to do it and it blocks most of the action unless you rotate quickly.

Gender stuff:

I was incredibly moved that not only can Rook be trans/nonbinary in the character creator if you so choose, but they get options to feel differently about their identity and journey, and it impacts their dialogue and how they relate to other characters! To access this make sure to interact with Varric's Mirror in your room in the Lighthouse. There are many conversation options throughout the game to discuss your identity with other characters, or relate your change of self to other situations. Crucially, it comes up when entering a romance and you have to communicate with your partner about it, which I never even THOUGHT of including in a game because it seemed impossible to even allow trans main characters to begin with.

There are also multiple trans and nonbinary characters throughout Thedas. What I found the most realistic was that just like in life, it is a consistent presence in any character's life, and comes up in conversation more than once. I have never seen a game this forthcoming and open about the topic of transitioning, and it was so validating. 

Final thoughts:

I adore the other games in the franchise. Something about The Veilguard affected me in a way no other game has. I cried multiple times while playing this game, both from joy and sadness. What struck me most is that the people who worked on this game REALLY listened to feedback from previous games, and were very set on making a piece of art that meant something to people. Even during the last few years of me testing the game, things have been adjusted and changed in direct response to our reactions and suggestions. It's surreal and quite touching.

Mileage will vary, but my playthrough was 70 hours on very low difficulty and I haven't done every side quest yet. I could easily have spent more than 100 hours in the game if I wasn't pressed for time.

I hope you enjoy this game as much as I have. See you in Thedas.

[funhouse-mirror-barbie]

How I would re-write Stella Goetia, Backstory + Season 1

Probably my most popular posts on this blog are about Stella from Helluva Boss. I like to talk about her because I think she had the potential to be a really nuanced character, and I really would’ve loved to see her and Stolas have a more complicated relationship.

So I’d like to talk about the direction I would’ve taken her characterization and story in.

I do need to stress that this is NOT a writing “fix-it” post. Canon Stella may be an evil bitch, but she’s MY evil bitch and I LOVE HER. I’ve already talked quite at length about how her character and conflict with Stolas being purely black and white is not a bad story decision, but to me is less interesting than having a grey or nuanced conflict.

I just want to go over a rough outline of what I would’ve done with her as a character. Just because it’s different, doesn’t mean it’s better or is “fixing” the canon story. I also am not trying to make Stella inherently more sympathetic/likable/or “woobify” her—this is just a ROUGH outline of what I’d do to flesh Stella out as a person, and ideas I’ve had for her character that would make her (and her relationships with Stolas and Via) more appealing to me personally.

I just really wish Stella had gotten more depth, and wanted to talk about it.

(LONG) Rewrite Summary below!!!

While I think there’s also an interesting re-write where Stella and Stolas are not in an arranged marriage, and may explore this idea as well, this time around I am going to be sticking with the canon background that their marriage was arranged.

Instead of having Stella be an evil heartless spoiled child who strangles puppies, I would give her a very strict upbringing where from birth she was groomed to be the “perfect noblewoman and wife”—I would base her upbringing and the expectations placed on her on what was expected of Regency noblewomen.

Basically, Stella would be raised to be able to run the house/estate when Stolas was away, be accomplished in the “domestic arts” (hosting events such as parties and balls, being able to do embroidery and other hobbies “befitting” of her class, and being involved in charitable efforts). She would be taught to be quiet, graceful, courteous, and to always anticipate the needs of her husband.

Stella’s “true” personality as a young child would be boisterous, loud, and precocious. Stella loved playing outside, singing loudly, and dancing.

She would have gotten in trouble with her parents often due to this (“Dancing for fun is what the poor do, Darling. You should only dance to find a suitable husband”) and would be punished by her Father by his ordering the rest of the family and their staff to ignore Stella completely and act like she didn’t exist. This would usually result in Stella acting out even more to try and MAKE everyone pay attention to her, until she’d get too tired to continue and start acting “proper” (I.e. quiet, not speaking too loud or speaking out of turn, being obedient, etc.)

Her relationship with Andrealphus would have been strained, as he would have been the “golden child” while Stella would be the scapegoat. I’d also like to give Stella magic fire powers. Because honestly why does Andre get Ice Magic and Stolas get space magic and Stella is the same type of demon as them apparently and gets nothing??? Boring.

Maybe this is basic, but honestly I love characters with fire powers who have to learn to control them. As child, Stella would have difficulty controlling her fire abilities, and would be not be taught how to use or maintain her powers, but would be taught to suppress them.

As an aside—again, I’m not giving Stella a traumatic childhood to make her more likable and more pitiable. I have two reasons I’m giving her this backstory—1) I believe that even people with great parents still end up with some childhood trauma, because being alive and growing up *is* traumatic. And 2) I think that there’s a lot of pretty good evidence that ROYAL upbringings, and the expectations and restrictions that come with them, are especially traumatic in a very particular and very intense way.

Doesn’t mean that they’re not extremely privileged, but that privilege also doesn’t take away that trauma.

I think it’s very realistic for both Stella AND Stolas, as children of royalty and nobility, to have a lot of childhood trauma surrounding their upbringings, and that’s something I really want to explore in my rewrite—how they cope with their traumas and how it impacts their relationship and their ability to raise their daughter and navigate conflict.

By an older teen to young adult, she would have learned how to behave as a “perfect noblewoman”. This is when she would meet Stolas for the first time (with a a Chaperone of course).

There would be a little bit of time shortly before and after their marriage where they would have their “honeymoon” period—both Stella and Stolas were very infatuated with each other and mistook that infatuation for “true love”.

This time where they were extremely infatuated with each other would last about a year, after which they would slowly begin to realize that the idealized images they had of one another was false. They would start to argue more, have a harder time compromising etc. until they finally realized they fell out of love, and maybe were never in love in the first place.

Even though the two of them would have come to this realization, it would be separately, and due to their upbringings (where you don’t really talk about your feelings and push them down) they would NOT talk to each other about it.

This would be the first big crack in their relationship, and they would both have a lot of guilt over it.

I like the idea of the two of them really, really want to stay in love with each other, but after they get to TRULY know each other they just…never fully “click”. They realize they don’t have the same interests, they can’t really find anything to talk about, and they just. They don’t stay in love.

Stella would be very in denial about her true feelings after this turning point, and would still try to convince herself that she really loves Stolas. She would have a lot of deeply buried guilt over not loving him, and see it as a failure of her “duties” as his wife.

After this, they would find a way to keep their relationship would be cordial and respectful, but it would always tinged by an unspoken awkwardness. It would be almost business-like in nature, and they would start spending more and more time apart.

To cope with this lackluster relationship that they were both now stuck in, Stolas would throw himself fully into his duties (which I would want to show a little more of…seriously what does…what does he do??? What does he use the grimoire for????) and Stella would do the same—throwing herself into her duties as the lady of the house and a Goetia Princess.

Stella would host parties and balls, she’d make sure manor was always clean and orderly, she’d become a patron of the arts.

The basis of their relationship would become one of them sticking to the roles that were thrust upon them since birth.

Things WOULD change for the better though after Octavia’s birth.

Because for a while, Stolas and Stella would have something, someone, that brought them together, that they both loved and cared for dearly.

Something that Stella and Stolas would have spoken about before having Octavia is that they did NOT, under any circumstance, want to raise Via like they were raised.

As I already went over, both Stella and Stolas would have dealt with abuse and neglect growing up—Stolas’ abuse stems from his parents being LARGELY absent in his life and him being very neglected as a child, while Stella’s stems from her parents being extremely controlling and giving her very little, if any, freedom.

They would firmly agree on letting Via be her own person, on making time for her, on not putting too many expectations on her.

And, in this rewrite, I would not have them be abusive or neglectful parents. But I would have them be very flawed parents, whose own traumatic upbringings negatively affect their ability to raise Via.

I would want to explore Stella and Stolas fighting to break the cycle of abuse they went through, but still struggling because they don’t have a good frame of reference for what being a good parent looks like.

Stolas doesn’t realize that he’s not always giving Octavia all the time with him she needs, because in his eyes he’s spending tons of time with her—it doesn’t occur to him that he’s actually being neglectful towards her, because to him, spending any long amount of time with her is more than he ever got from his father. He’ll spend time with her, and talk to her, but not really LISTEN to what she’s saying she needs, and doesn’t understand why she doesn’t like the things she used to, or is mad at him for not taking more time for her.

Stella doesn’t realize she’s still being controlling or pushing her expectations onto Octavia by making passive aggressive comments suggesting she wear more “appropriate” or “feminine” clothing, or take up a “nicer” hobby like needlepoint and drop taxidermy. She gives Via the freedom to choose what she wants to do, but doesn’t fully SUPPORT those choices, and doesn’t understand why that’s so important, since in the end Octavia is still enjoying freedoms that Stella only dreamed of as a child.

Still, they manage to be a fairly functional and loving family towards Octavia. And Stolas and Stella maintain their cordial and business like relationship for Octavia’s sake, and to keep up appearances.

During Octavia’s teen years, when she’s 14-17, is when more cracks begin to show—Stella and Stolas have been keeping their relationship together, but it’s stagnating more and more. Stolas throws himself even more into his duties with the stars (or whatever) and Stella begins to become gradually more and more concerned and anxious about making sure her family maintains a “perfect” reputation among the other royals of hell.

Stella begins to throw more balls and parties for Hell’s charities (if this version of hell has banks, and police and prisons, they can have charitable organizations, okay.) As her and Stolas’s anniversary starts to get closer, she begins planning a HUGE ball for Hell’s nobility to celebrate. It’s hugely important to her.

While she’s doing all of this, Stolas is beginning to have an early-to-mid-life crisis. His work and duties that used to be engaging and fun are feeling more and more like a chore, his relationship with Stella has stagnated and is purely for show, he’s getting more and more anxious about Octavia approaching adulthood, and his whole life is beginning to feel more and more claustrophobic.

So. Stolas decides to do something wild, spontaneous, and very selfish, before he loses it. On a night where Stella is attending an Opera, and Via is spending the night with friends from school*, Stolas dresses in clothes he assumes “the common folk” would wear, and goes to shady bar in IMP city, with the goal of meeting someone to hook up with.

This is where Stolas meets Blitzø. (Sorry, I’m. I’m not doing the whole “paid childhood friends for one day” background.)

They have what both assume will be a one night stand at Blitzø’s place. It goes. MUCH better than either of them would have expected sex-wise. The two start meeting up more and more when they’re able to. Stolas begins to open up more to Blitzø, but it stays VERY sexual—eventually Stolas comes clean about who he is and they start to hook up at Stolas’ place whenever Stella is out. Stolas is very much infatuated with Blitzø (and the sex they have). Blitzø thinks they’re having non-complicated fun.

During AAALLL of this is when Blitzø learns about the Grimoire, and asks if he can “borrow” it for I.M.P. Stolas is impressed with Blitzø’s confidence and drive, and agrees to let Blitzø use it anytime, with the one exception being the night of the full moon. There is no full moon “deal” beyond the agreement that Blitzø cannot accept clients on the full moon because Stolas needs the book back that night.

During all of this is ALSO when Stella begins to notice Stolas acting differently, he’s slightly more energetic, he’s spending less and less time in his study and the manor in general, he doesn’t look her in the eyes when they do have time to chat briefly. It’s odd, and she’s suspicious of SOMETHING going on but she’s not sure what.

Stolas DOES feel guilty about cheating on Stella, but justifies it by telling himself that they’re not in a “true” marriage, and it’s “just sex”, so he’s not really cheating on Stella.

The night of Stella and Stolas’s anniversary ball arrives. To Stella, everything goes as expected, and it’s a huge success.

During the ball, though, we get the same scene we get in the Circus—Blitzø gets caught trying to sneak into Stolas’ room. Instead of the guards bringing him into the party, they call Stolas outside privately to deal with it (because why would the disrupt the party by dragging a party-crasher through the middle of a fancy ball?? I didn’t really understand why they did that in the og episode)

Stolas dismisses the guards, and we learn that Blitzø has been sneaking in (with Stolas’ permission+ knowledge) to get the grimoire after the full moon when he and Stolas don’t have time to meet up in person. Like tonight.

Instead of just handing off the grimoire like usual, Stolas and Blitzø end up hooking up (mutually and wholly consensually). Stolas does not return to the party.

Stella is really concerned about how Stolas’ absence looks, especially at a ball she planned with so many high profile demon lords present, but she’s able to wave it off as Stolas feeling a little tired and retiring early, due to it being the day after his full moon duties and all.

Instead of returning to their room, that night, Stella sleeps in one of the many guest rooms. She doesn’t know where Stolas is, but she’s mad at him for leaving early without saying anything on such an important night, and is hoping not coming to their bed will send a message—she’s tired anyway and doesn’t want to get in a big fight before bed that will tire her out more.

The next morning she has tea in the garden with some close friends. And this is where we get the infamous “Sorry, I fucked your husband!” scene.

After this, well. Stella kinda loses her shit. She had been pushing down all of her negative feelings and thoughts and frustrations surrounding her life and relationship for YEARS, because in her mind, as long as she was able to maintain the facade of having a “perfect” life, it would be worth it.

And now in a moment she’s lost the thing that, after her daughter, mattered to her the most.

She essentially explodes in fury in a way Stolas has never seen before—they get in a huge argument—Stella’s fire powers come out and burn down the manor’s garden, things just really get out of hand.

So. What would follow would be most of what we see of Stella in season 1 of HB—now that that floodgate has been opened, she finds she’s struggling to control her feelings, she’s mad and sad ALL THE TIME, and she’s deeply deeply hurt in a way she didn’t know she could be.

She can’t show her face in society, she doesn’t know WHAT to say to Octavia, she can’t believe Stolas could be SO SELFISH after EVERYTHING she had done to make sure their family was in high standing—and she can’t push down her feelings anymore. She’s never been so furious in her entire life.

And so she contacts a hitman, Striker.

I really like the old fan theory that Stella hired Striker in a moment of irrationality and anger because of how hurt she was—obviously her hurt does not justify trying to have her husband MURDERED, but I like the idea that she called the hit because she was deeply hurt and unable to cope with those feelings—not because she just hates him to the core of his being and has for their entire marriage. Her anger would be a coping mechanism, if she’s so busy feeling furious she doesn’t have to actually sit with her feelings of betrayal and sadness and hurt.

From here, the rest of season one would play out like in canon, we don’t see Stella in person again, just the apparition of her in Ozzie’s.

I’m going to stop here because this post is already way too long, it it’ll help me to think more if I split it up.

If you read this far please tell me what you think! I think I’d like overall for Stella and Stolas’ relationship to mirror Blitzø and Verosika’s, or maybe become a foil to it. From here we could honestly go either way—either Stella becomes a true villain, or she becomes an antagonist turned hesitant ally like Fizz, Ozzie, and Verosika.

I can see both being interesting, so maybe I’ll do a rewrite for both. We’ll see I guess.

*it weirds me the FUCK out that we don’t know anything about what Hell’s kids do, like I assume schools exist but ???anyway in this rewrite Stella and Stolas send Octavia to a fancy private school—cause the thought of her having NO friends or social circle makes me so sad)

[vasito-de-leche]

;R1999 6 - Relationship Headcanons

Compilation of headcanons about 6 in a romantic relationship.

I was struggling soooooo hard with another 6 request so I had to get this post out of my system fist before tackling that one

Okay, first of all! I don't see 6 as the type of person who would be that interested in having a relationship, at least not beyond what is expected of him as the leader of Apeiron. It's the least of his priorities as of now.

Part of it is largely due to his responsibilities--he knows that he cannot afford to show any sort of favoritism, and he is much too thoughtful to force someone he cares about under such pressure, simply because he harbors feelings for them. It's very ironic that the one thing that defines his entire life and existence is also what keeps him from seeking any deeper relationships. 6 knows more than anyone that the loneliness of his title would be extended to his partner, and so, he has no actual firsthand experience in romantic relationships other than what he might've studied while in reclusion.

Of course, this isn't to say that he's entirely inept when it comes to socializing or all sorts of relationships. He is the best at being 6 for a reason, as much as he dislikes it.

We know that he loves his people, if his devotion to his role of leader is anything to go by. And he clearly cares about his friendship with 210, 37 and Sophia, as strained or complex as these dynamics may be, as he makes sure to retrieve the crown that they made for him each and every day that it's stolen. He loved his aunt Alma too, she played a big role in his upbringing after all.

So 6 isn't a stranger to love, but he is very passive about it.

To describe 6 as "passive" could be seen as an insult, especially after what his character event showed us in relation to his struggle against fate, but I think there's a key difference to the passive nature that is presented between 6 prior to receiving the Revelation and after he settles in as the new leader. His initial lack of action was fueled by resignation, a fear for the inevitable fate his bloodline carries. But now, he knows that refusing to act is sometimes necessary to maintain the harmony within the island, this is why he's described as a mediator. Love can happen, but there's no reason to upset the precarious balance he maintains by indulging in romance.

On the subject of 6 developing a crush.

6 is an extremely introspective man with a very good grasp on his own feelings and thoughts--even more so now that he's obtained the Revelation! If he has a crush then trust me, he knows. He notices the fondness he has for you the moment those feelings start blooming in his chest.

And he's not going to do a single thing about it.

He's not going to act upon any of his feelings. He's not going to let anyone find out, for the sake of maintaining this perfect balance. His behaviour remains the same, no signs of being flustered whatsoever. There are no fleeting glances, no hands brushing on accident. He doesn't stare at you from afar, wondering if you could ever love him, pining and yearning for your attention.

That doesn't happen, not in public.

Just like every other detail about his life, his thoughts of you are kept private, for him to ponder on whenever he's alone in his room, meditating. The outside world has no business bearing witness to these feelings--you are special to him and so, he keeps the memory of you safe and sound. 6 is much too mature to actually pine and yearn, but he does like to wonder and explore other possibilities, another life in which he's not burdened by fate, in which he's given the choice to find his own soul number for as long as it takes. Another life in which he can openly confess without fearing for what might happen to you should you accept him.

I like to think that these little fantasies help him tolerate the stress of the daily routine, it's something nice that gives him solace. When he's alone, his existence isn't defined by a number nor the history of his family, he can just be at ease and dream of better things.

I want to stress the fact that he wouldn't confess, no matter how strong his feelings are. Even if you happened to reciprocate, 6 would always prioritize the stability of Apeiron and turn you down for your sake and everyone else's. 6 would actually prefer to be close friends with his crush.

On the subject of dating 6.

I like to think that for 6 to start considering the idea of courting you, you have to actually debate him.

Not a battle of attrition like the debates 210 insists on having, but a fair and honest discussion to give him proof and solid arguments that could help him ease into the idea of dating someone for love, rather than duty. Something like this would really ease 6's mind, being able to get to know you better through the way you defend yourself and the love you hold for him, as well as weighting the public's reaction. Two birds in one stone. If you manage to do that, then there's no reason for him to object.

I don't know what I like the most out of these options though, the idea of 6 choosing to give a proper confession in private to finally share everything he's kept to himself, so that you may accept all of him at his most honest and vulnerable. Or him not confessing, choosing to invite you to his study and enjoy a moment of respite in absolute silence, knowing that there's nothing keeping you two from being together. So whichever floats your boat!

When it comes to actually dating him, not much would change.

6 understands that there's been a considerable shift in his life, but his lack of experience and solitary lifestyle would lead him to continue with his routine--if you want to see him, then you'll have to seek him out like you've always done. He's more than content knowing you're aware of his feelings and wouldn't really seek to change anything else, so it's entirely up to you to communicate and discuss what you'd like out of this relationship. He'll be more than glad to listen and accomodate you as much as he can.

You taking the initiative in this might also fuel him to share the things he'd like to do! Again, this passive nature doesn't come from shyness, but duty. I can see him being open to anything and being very direct about his own needs, as long as he can continue to separate his personal life and time with you from his time outside and his responsibilities.

Overall, dating 6 is a very calm experience! He never got the chance to know himself without the pressure of the Revelation, but he enjoys getting to know you instead. While most of the time he simply asks you to sit with him and relax, he puts the effort into finding time to spend with you, even if it's just walking together from one place to another before both of you must tend to your respective duties.

On the subject of his partner not being from Apeiron.

The way I see it, 6 is a little more lenient with certain aspects--unlike 37, for example. I don't see her capable of being in a romantic relationship with an irrational number, and getting to trust someone from outside who isn't specifically aiming to adapt to the scriptures will take a long time, but 6 is a little more flexible under the proper circumstances.

I believe this is the case because of his Bond: Morning voice line!

...One should never parcel off the loaf, for it's a violation of the scripture. But we are not on the island. So, please enjoy the freedom.

So the moment this pressure of responsibility is lifted from his shoulders, I think he would be open to the possibility of his partner being literally anyone. Because of the Revelation, I don't think 6 is blinded by faith like other members of Apeiron are, if else he's burdened by the contradictions and paradoxes that are natural in the world.

Not sure how he would feel with a human partner though! Chapter 05 only says that humans and mankind as a whole are dismissed entirely as "imaginary numbers," forbidden on the island, and there's no specifics on how they feel about mixed arcanists.

Round of cute things.

Literally just a round of cute things that 6 would do or enjoy because I don't know how to incorporate them onto the post in a fancy way.

His crown was made to keep his hair out of his face, but we can see that it's not doing a very good job lol. I think 6 would really find it charming whenever his partner tucks his hair behind his ear so they can get a look at his face--he's much too used to hiding and keeping to himself, so wanting to be seen by you is a pretty new experience. It's also a very casual and innocent gesture, so whenever he feels like getting you to pay attention to him (more than often as a way to excuse himself out of some other conversation) he will allow his hair to drape over his face hoping you'll notice.

6 isn't big on public displays of affection. Just sitting next to you is more than enough for him--but if he happens to notice you get lonely or make cute eyes at him, he will scoot close until your shoulders bump into each other. If 6 is feeling particularly cuddly, he will hold your hand.

But behind closed doors, 6 is very partial to kissing the top of your head or your temple. It's a very gentle kiss, he doesn't even pucker up, just closes his eyes, gently rests his lips there and hums to himself. And he could stay there for a long time if you let him.

If 6 is feeling restless for whatever reason, I can see him asking you to read something for him, so he can concentrate on the sound of your voice and nothing else. It's very soothing to him. He prefers that you read something he can tune out, as opposed to telling him something he'd like to pay attention to--like your thoughts or how your day has been.

Oh! Also, I don't see him as the type to want matching accessories or material things like that, but if you were to give him a gift or something to match with you, he would specifically ask you to keep it simple--nothing gilded, nothing shiny, nothing that is easy for seagulls to steal. Something like a little string bracelet, if possible in your favorite colors rather than his--it might be just a small fragment in a world of matters, but it means so much to him.

Also also, 6 does notice a lot of your gestures or expressions, the little things about you that often go unnoticed. The way you might scrunch your nose, tilt your head, fiddle with your hands, tap your feet--anything.

[let-us-cultivate-our-garden]

The reason why the toh fandom can have such wildly diverging interpretations of the Wittebane story is because the show did not do its job. How old was Philip when Caleb left? Did Caleb truly believe in witch hunting or was he just playing along to what the town expected? Did Caleb ever tell Philip anything? Did he ever talk to his brother and try to change his mind? How long was Philip searching for Caleb? How did he get cursed? How exactly did the knife fight start? Did Philip kill Caleb accidentally or on purpose? Did he kill him only because he married a witch or because he left him? Or both?

The fact is, we don't have definitive answers to any of these. We only have educated guesses based on portraits barely glimpsed in the show that lack any context, Masha's barebones version of events, and Belos' self-justifications. Casual fans shouldn't have to be knee-deep in fandom just to get the main villain's backstory, especially when said story is the literal basis of the whole plot.

Plus, if you're going to spend the final half of your last season barely exploring the villain's origins, only to completely ignore it in the series finale, then you've written a bad ending.

Update: This is getting some notes so I'm including additional thoughts to the original post. The rest will be under the read more:

Just to add onto this because some folks argue that we don’t need his backstory because we already have the essentials or it’s not really important to the plot. The thing is though is that Belos’ story launches the entire plot of the show, his character and motivation are the direct result of actions that happened centuries before the main characters were born. It needs to be depicted and not largely inferred. 

His story is important to creating a more fleshed out character and can strengthen the themes of the show (the rivalry between Eda and Lilith and Luz struggling to fit in at home are parallels to Belos). Instead the show gives little kernels of his story and character that make him more interesting than just Evil Emperor (the fact that the brothers became witch hunters to fit in, the fact that Belos worst memories are of killing Caleb and making grimwalkers are never touched on again). The first (and last) time we see Caleb in a full scene is in For the Future and it has huge implications for the dynamic between the two brothers. But again, nothing is done with it. It seemed like the show was building up that Belos’ lies and self-justifications would lead to his undoing but it doesn’t. So him dying with his ideology and self-delusions intact feels empty.

The worst part of how the Wittebane story is handled is that since it’s largely inferred and you have to be pretty involved in fandom to have a more nuanced take of it, a casual fan can easily just accept other characters’ views on the matter. Masha says “looks like little bro was jealous of big bro” and it undercuts the story of the Wittebanes (to say nothing of the tonal whiplash). The Titan dismisses Belos as only caring for himself and to be the hero, which while technically true, misses a lot of context and makes it easy to dismiss Belos as a whole as simply being evil and crazy instead of a more layered villain. And it can’t be argued that these are just the characters’ perspectives and we shouldn’t take it at face value because there’s nothing really in the show to pushback against that. 

Now, yes, it is fun to imagine how the Wittebane story played out and in hindsight, it’s probably better that the show didn’t depict the entire story because they probably would have botched it. But the point remains that the handling of this storyline was a mess (and don’t give me the cancellation excuse, the show learned early on about this and wrote all of 2B with it in mind). The Wittebane story and Belos as a whole showcase why setup and payoff matter. You show the villain feels guilt about their worst deeds? What’s the payoff to that? The villain was originally an outsider who tried to fit in and conformed to a town’s toxic ideologies? What’s the payoff? The villain continually lies to himself and commits atrocities to justify his actions? What’s the payoff? 

If you’re going to raise interesting and thought-provoking questions then don’t give the audience a simplistic answer.

[sunny44]

What about us (Part 3)

Pairing: Lewis Hamilton x Fem!reader

Warnings: mentions of retirement

Summary: deep talks and discussions about Lewis’ future.

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

The days that followed the Monaco Grand Prix were a mix of tranquil moments and shared laughter. Lewis, seemingly rejuvenated by his unexpected victory, began to engage more with Harley and me. The burden that had weighed on his shoulders seemed to dissipate, replaced by a newfound lightness.

One evening, after putting Harley to bed, Lewis and I found ourselves on the balcony again, the city below us bathed in the soft glow of streetlights.

"I never expected to win that race," he admitted, his eyes fixed on the distant lights. "But being on the podium... I felt something different this time."

I leaned against the railing, watching him closely.

"Different how?" He hesitated, then met my gaze.

"I realized that my identity isn't exclusively defined by Formula 1. Even though people might know me just as a driver, I feel like I'm more than that. There's more to life, more to me. I was so caught up in the pursuit of success and winning again that I forgot about other aspects of living."

"Like what?"

"The woman I love and our daughter." He smiled, and I sat on his lap as we embraced.

A gentle breeze carried the scent of the sea, and I felt a subtle shift in the air, as if transformation were settling into our lives.

"You know you're much more than the Mercedes driver, right?" He looked at me and nodded. "You're a great person, always supporting those you love, putting others' needs before yours without resentment. And above all, you're the best father Harley could have. So, never define yourself solely as a Formula 1 driver because you're so much more than that."

"Thank you for that; you don't know how important it is for me to hear you say that." He tucked a strand of hair that fell on my face behind my ear. "I don't need much, just my girls."

…

In the days that followed, Lewis began exploring more interests beyond racing and his usual routine. He joined my work events, attended Harley's school performances, took her to the park and spent afternoons playing with her and Roscoe, returning home sweaty, tired, and hungry.

On a weekend, we decided to take a spontaneous trip to the countryside outside London, away from the streets and the bustling life of Monaco. Surrounded by nature, we had a moment of peace, just watching the trees, feeling the breeze on our faces, and enjoying family time before the second part of the racing season resumed.

As we walked through a sunlit field, Lewis turned to me with a sincere expression.

"I've been thinking about what comes next. For us."

I listened, feeling a mix of anticipation and apprehension.

"I want to be there for Harley, for you. These past few weeks where I could be her dad 100% of the time, driving her to school and spending the whole day with her, made me realize that I want this to be more recurring in my life. But I also want to explore this new chapter, whatever it brings."

"And what does that mean?"

"It means I'm considering stepping back from racing full-time and embracing a different pace of life."

His words hung in the air, and I sensed the significance of the moment. It was a crossroads, a juncture where our paths could diverge or converge.

"Are you sure?"

"I’m not, actually."

"You know you don't have to stop for our sake."

"But I feel that because of this, I haven't spent enough time with you guys." He looked at Harley running and laughing with Roscoe. "I feel like I've missed so much of her life and yours during the time we were apart, and I don't want that anymore."

"Love, you didn't miss that time because of your career but because we weren't living together. I know you want to spend more time with us, and we'll figure out how to make that happen. Formula 1 is your life, and..."

"You and Harley are my life." He interrupted me.

"And you're ours, but I don't want you to make this decision without really thinking about it. I don't want you to resent leaving and finding that the quieter life isn't what you imagined. But let's not talk about it now, okay? Let's enjoy the rest of our break, and if, by the end of the season, you still feel the same and want to step back, we'll be here for you. We can navigate this together, and whatever you choose, we'll face it as a family."

Those two weeks were what we needed to relax and sort out our lives, and we decided to live together. We had an open conversation about our future, and one of the things we wanted was to spend more time as a family. As we don't have a typical life, any time we have together, we want to make the most of it.

So, the best thing to do was to move back into the same house. Harley and I moved into Lewis's apartment. In reality, there were still many things left for a complete move. The time we had before Lewis had to travel again was too short, and we could only bring our clothes.

"Mommy, where's Daddy?" I heard her ask as soon as she entered the kitchen.

"He's still sleeping."

"What are you doing?" Her voice was sleepy, and I felt her cling to my legs.

"I'm making a smoothie; do you want one?" She shook her head and reached out her arms.

I picked her up, and I continued preparing the smoothies. Somehow, Harley fell asleep in my arms amid the noise of the blender.

"Good morning." I heard his husky voice and felt him hug me from behind.

"Good morning."

"Want to give get to me?" I agreed since my arm was numb, and she almost woke up, but I think she felt it was her dad and just hugged him more.

"I missed this so much."

"What?"

"Waking up, and you're the first person I see in the morning." I smiled and gave him a peck, serving the smoothies in glasses.

"I missed this too." I handed him his glass, and he started drinking.

"And you know what's even better?"

"What?"

"The fact that this is the first time we're living together as parents."

That was true; when I found out about the pregnancy, we were no longer together, so this was the first time we were living together as a family.

"It's a bit strange, actually."

"How so?"

"It's just been the two of us for so long that it's still hard to believe that we're finally all together." He smiled. "Do you think she's okay with all of this?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's a huge change for her. We understand the situation because we lived it, but Harley is small, and her whole life has been with us living different lives. So, I'm worried that we're so wrapped up in our love bubble that we might be forgetting her feelings."

"I understand, and I completely agree with what you're saying. I can talk to her later if you want me to."

"I'll talk to her." I said, and he agreed.

"Look, I have to catch a flight to Vegas tonight and then after that to Abhu Dhabi and I don't know if you guys want to come with me or…”

"I don't know; I think it's a bit last minute. We'd have to pack our things and hers, and we have to adapt gradually to this. You know she gets really restless when we have to take flights."

"I know; she doesn't like it much." He agreed. "But, as you said, we have all the time in the world, and we can take it easy."

"We really do." He smiled, and as soon as we finished our smoothies, I washed the glasses, and after he took her upstairs and put her on her bed, we spent some time together on the couch since he would have to travel soon.

Bonus Scene!

Yourusername Instagram stories

“Lazy days with my favorite girl”

Tag list: @ironmaiden1313 @myloverjk-blog @leoramage @ricciardosheart

[my-darling-boy]

Good morning, I hope you're doing well.

I just wanted to start by saying I deeply admire your work, and have found it beautiful, emotive and inspiring.

From what I know, you do reenactments in the UK and I've been wanting to get into reenactment myself for a looooong time, but I've always chickened out because I'm trans (ftm, pre T/medical transition).

It's super refreshing to find a trans person in this scene. I was wondering if you had any advice? Whether that's how to find safe groups, how to find costumes that fit, how to maybe start projects yourself. Any advice at all would be deeply appreciated.

The ww1/ww2 periods are really close to my heart and I would adore the opportunity to explore reenactments for these periods of history in a safe environment.

All the best,

🪖

Ah that’s awesome you’re interested in getting into reenactment, it’s a really fun hobby! Don’t think I’ve seen any advice posts for world war reenactors specifically in your situation; I think “modern” military reenactment with this in mind comes with special considerations, so I’ll do my best to give a loose Survival Guide below the cut if you’re wanting to start. This will be Long, but I’ve not seen another resource on this sort of thing from the trans angle so might as well be specific! These are just my own observations to hopefully give you a bit more perspective on whether or not it’s something you’re comfortable pursuing. That all being said…

★ In the case of being trans, especially without medical transition, I HIGHLY advise against doing this hobby completely stealth, it’s just not a good idea. For many events, you camp in the same tent/room with lads your age to men 60+ and may have to change in front of them. Even in the event there is space/bathroom to change, it’s sometimes only a single stall crawling with spiders as a lot of re-enactments are in a little village in the middle of nowhere. If it’s not your own group that could cause problems upon circumstantially finding out, it could be another reenactor or member of the public. If you bind or pack, you have to get the things on and off secretly around so many people you don’t know. Some events are in other countries. For a lot of events, there isn’t any cell service so in the off-chance something goes wrong and you have no one to help you…. You’re Cooked.

★ Transparency to some capacity is best. Whether it’s just a couple group members that know or the whole group knows, someone’s support is your greatest safety net. If you find a group you want to trial, I recommend first shooting an email rather than meeting face to face. Ask if they’re looking for new members, if they already are, that you would be interested in a trial. Add that you’re trans and you want to know if this is an issue, there’s really no other way to ask this. It’s complex, but really they’re not allowed to tell you no on grounds of discrimination, however you can gauge how accepting they are by their response. If they’re suddenly not looking for new members or they play email tag over weeks with no clear answer, pass. Being upfront about it if you’re pre-everything will save you wasting time on groups who don’t want to work with you.

★ Research local regiments/groups you want. Searching near your county may mean you won’t have to travel too far for events, but not always. And you don’t have to stay local, I find groups accept members from just about anywhere in the UK, even outside it sometimes! It’s also good to have some research done on the regiment/battalion you want.

★ Next, big, very important: World War re-enactment is a very Actual Military dominated hobby, and you’ll be exposed to all that entails. I say this to give you a heads up as to the social environment you’re entering into which not many trans people may consider. There’s no way to engage with this area of group reenactment that is completely divorced from the genus of the military as it exists today, even for historical education. The groups I’ve met as well as my own are comprised mostly of veterans, people currently serving, or those from military/first-responder families. In my own observation, world war groups feel more like off-shoot capillaries of the military as opposed to doing something like medieval reenactment or a Jacobite. They are run, funded, and supported in full or part by current/ex military members and organisations. Now obviously it’s not the real military, you’re not enlisted, you’re not going to get court-martialed if you do something wrong! However, these groups try to hold themselves to the same professionalism that you would get if you were actually in the forces cos you’re portraying someone in the military—albeit 1916–who would’ve held themselves to the same standards. There’s fun, there’s jokes, but you stand up so straight on inspection that it’s uncomfortable, eyes front, you never fool around with a weapon, you do what you’re told, and you try to help out every member as best you can cos you’re a unit. It’s a balance between being serious and fun. I know I’m silly outside it, but once I’m on site, it’s time for more discretion. You’re first and foremost an educational historical actor, and as such you’re required to conduct yourself in the public eye as a service member—someone’s ancestor—representing a real regiment that more than likely still exists. This is not a Ren Faire environment. A reenactment group does not exist in a vacuum and neither do the world wars. Not every group is as connected with the Real military as others, but this is just a Heads Up in case interacting with these entities contributes to making you feel “unsafe” in your position.

★ There is also that complicated grey area of how even the most progressive group still exists within a network of current systems which are traditional and affects the way that group must present itself to the public and their Real Military Counterparts they are inseparable from. World war reenacting is still deeply intertwined with current forces and old tradition because the wars and their decades are still within collective consciousness and still hot topics of discussion. Some people really take issue with trans people in the hobby, we all know this, so even as supportive as a group may be, many choose for safety to be on the DL when engaging with other hobbyists whom you don’t know (outside of your group). I personally don’t know any other trans men active in WW groups, though I know they’re out there. That alone should give you an idea as to how Quiet we keep it for safety, even if, bless them, our cis group mates would gladly tell someone off for being transphobic. Though having to be on the DL to anyone outside your group at events for someone who is pre-everything can be anxiety inducing. It’s why I say it’s for your own benefit that at least someone in your group 100% has your back.

★ Lads love teasing each other and will tease you, with love, but don’t be the doormat for anything transphobic. As is the case with the real military, jokes/teasing is an integral part of the camaraderie and as I said, lots of people doing WW reenacting are current/ex military. Short jokes @ me are common, they’re made with love, it’s not transphobic or malicious. While someone messing with you is common cis male bonding, don’t hesitate to tell someone steady on if they go over the line or they’re genuinely being malicious before you go to the sergeant with a formal complaint. It’s usually an immediate apology and then never doing it again. And as said, don’t let transphobic teasing slide. If there is any phobic joke that could fly under the radar to someone not privy, it would be jokes equating you with someone called “Bob” so if you ever hear that one—if you don’t already know what that means—definitely bring that up to someone!

★ A tip for cis male dominated spaces: self-confidence, optimism, and a general good nature will get you far. Being extremely, constantly awkward or aloof from dysphoria or fearing cis men will tend to get you “othered”. It can be hard to be more vocal or confident if you’re anxious not having had many dealings with cis male social groups, but my advice is to try to be as casual as possible, shaking hands with eye contact, going about your business, and Being Normal about guys walking around half naked in the mornings or accidentally catching sight of your mate’s bits. Generally, if you’re not Weird about them, no one’s Weird about you!

★ It’s also a mutual respect-based environment. As long as you’re mature, level, putting in the effort, are quick to learn, friendly, and doing your bit in the group, chances are you will get along with everyone fine and they will get along with you regardless of anyone’s politics or beliefs, which I think is most trans people’s fear for this hobby. Everyone is aware infighting and heated debates over anything can destroy a group or bring harm against yourself or your mates, which is why I’ve found if you simply say you don’t feel comfortable talking about something, people back off cos they respect that. Trans or not, if you’re abrasive or egotistical, just like any social situation, respect for you goes down.

★ People are more than happy to impart knowledge, there are lads who could easily talk for hours about one thing if you get them going so don’t be afraid to ask questions! If you’re nervous about asking someone for help with drill, kit, etc it’s less “How do you not know this?” and more “I’m SO glad you asked!” It’s sort of like having a group of brothers for the weekend, always teaching you something. I find reenactors can never pass up an opportunity to thoroughly explain something (myself included) and sometimes even unprompted will just point to something you’ve got and start telling a story about it. Everyone, even elder members, learn something new every event

★ In terms of clothing sizing, I’ve got stereotypical male proportions (bar my height) so I can’t speak much from personal struggle on this one. Most modern-made reenactment gear is quite amply sized, which is fine if you’re larger but is a pain if you’re smaller. Most groups will have spare kit in diff sizes you can borrow on trialling them, and there are good videos on YouTube to familiarise yourself with all the parts and how to care for them, and of course you can ask me here as well. If you want something yourself, everyone and their mums starts out with Soldier of Fortune these days, and owning your own trousers/tunic of course means you can tailor it if need be. You’re also looking at around at least £600 for a relatively complete kit, but tbh it’s easily over £1000 weapons and extras included.

★ On clothing, maybe it’s cos I’m short, but your grey flannel is your best friend if you have to get changed in front of someone and don’t want them to see your Downstairs. The greybacks are quite long I find, so as long as it’s on, you can change trousers and sometimes even undergarments without flashing anyone.

★ On getting changed: always try to be the first to get ready, it doesn’t look weird, you just look on top of things! Do a bit of recon when you can about changing spaces and the toilet situation cos you might be able to get creative where you change, including in your sleeping bag. It’s good to try to get at least an undershirt and bottom half on before the group wakes up, you easily put on tunic and boots and the rest alongside everyone else. You might even find you just end up sleeping in kit, sometimes we do that. Getting to the toilet first also means you not only avoid being late for inspection trying to sort yourself, but you’re not after the lad with the Least Desirable morning routine (and believe me, there will be at least one, if not more).

★ Though sleeping in the same space and getting ready around each other is usually expected, it’s not mandatory. For some multi-day events, it may be possible to go home and come back the next morning so you don’t have to sleep/change with the rest of the boys. It’s possible to show up to events already kitted and leave kitted so you don’t need to change at all. If you’re all staying in a hotel, you can get a separate room or if everyone is staying at camp, you can stay in a local inn if there is one. If you’re under canvas, you can always bring a separate tent and sleep by yourself. HOWEVER, because sleeping together (and drinking till 3 AM) and getting ready polishing brass or making breakfast is a Group Bonding Experience just be aware you’ll miss out on that bonding if you go off alone a lot or cut events short to go home/come back, if having more bonding is particularly important to you!

★ If you’re binding, it’s worth noting depending on what exactly you’re doing you carry anywhere between 20-50 extra pounds on your person. There is decent physical activity, you are with equipment on your feet for most of the day, and hobnail boots are not the most comfortable. Being in an entirely wool uniform on a baking, humid day in a binder would be absolutely bloody miserable. You would have to take the binder off after all that lest you hurt yourself. Also, if you join a Highland Regiment, it is not a good idea to pack. And I’m not talking about your kit bag. If your Swagger Stick falls out on a demo in front of hundreds of families, there is no coming back from that, there really is no room for Oopsy in that scenario, it’s not worth the embarrassment!

★ As for starting projects yourself… that’s a tricky one. If it’s like a little reenactment group, that’s a massive undertaking, I could write a novel about that alone and the money and insurance and complex social things that would involve. There are ways you can do solo reenactment for educational purposes, though this requires having a relationship with whatever venue is hiring you such as a museum. While doing a scout or medic would be easy enough, doing a fully kitted infantryman would be a bit harder. If you have weapons like a rifle or bayonet, you need a permit to carry them. Solo reenacting also requires you to know A TON of information, not just about the war, but the surrounding time period give or take 20 years, your entire kit, gear, and loads of other things.

★ In conclusion, as intimidating as this can seem to navigate around cis men as a trans man for (potentially) the first time in a very military, traditionally masc environment…. I think as long as you come into it with the same attitude as any young man would at the time, you’ve got pals to back you up, and you try to be cheery and do your bit, you’re likely to do just fine and have fun! I know reenactment can seem like the straight white old male phobic hardcore conservative hobby, but it is a really rewarding experience as long as you take some precautions, there are some genuinely lovely people in it, eager to pass on their knowledge. If you feel a group is not a good fit, you can always leave, and there will be other groups who will be more than happy to have you. While I can’t say I’ve met any trans men in my time doing it, I’ve at least met some other LGB reenactors who are really lovely and very supportive.

Hope something here puts your anxiety at ease, or at least doesn’t make anything worse! If it’s of any comfort, I think groups as a whole are becoming much more supportive of LGBT+ members. I think the coming generations that are starting to have more active involvement in this area of reenactment look to be making it better for LGBT+ people to participate in historical education and overall hobby engagement.

Cheers! x

[bvckbiter]

some thoughts on characterization of the seven in hoo, VERY long post ahead:

for each of the five books in the series, i read them right as they came out and endured the year-long wait til the next release. like many readers, i was thrown off by the introduction of the new trio in the lost hero. but that was offset by 1) the seemingly more mature vibe/themes that riordan wanted to explore, 2) the monumental tension that was being built around the greek-roman separation, and 3) percy's comeback in son of neptune, even as an amnesiac.

mark of athena, released october 2012, was extremely anticipated because it was set to be the long-awaited percabeth reunion as well as the true crossover for the greek and roman spheres. there were a lot of theories being made at the time. would piper be able to mediate between eons-long enemies in a genuinely diplomatic way, or was she going to brainwash charmspeak them into compliance? how is reyna going to take jason suddenly having another girl and a new set of friends and another life after abruptly disappearing? will we get to learn more about jason's relationships within camp jupiter? would nico be dealing with any fallout from essentially boating along two riverbanks (translated directly from a tagalog idiom, so if the wording seems clunky thats why)? it didn't help that the first avengers movie came out in 2012, so the idea of a huge crossover event was all the hype then.

the published work, in my opinion... fell considerably short of expectations.

to be fair, we got some very good character moments. i did not find the judo flip scene cute, just kinda weird in the sense that i felt the author didn't know how to handle such a huge emotional turning point, but percabeth for the most part of moa was enjoyable, really giving you the high of this teenage couple finally being able to resume the honeymoon period they were probably in after four years of pining and a war lol. everything the fans wanted! unfortunately, we didn't get the same with other characters.

while i wouldn't say that percabeth was the reason, the difference in spotlight is nonetheless very staggering. the roman-greek reunification goes bad, sure, but it begins due to outside interference more rather than any actual intrinsic differences between the two camps; so the built-up tension from the previous books kinda falls flat. we get none of jason's backstory, so next to percy, he barely leaves an impression on the reader. hazel, frank, and leo get shafted into this weird love triangle where their enemy is leo's long-dead ancestor who ultimately makes no impact on the plot other than to have hazel and leo intersect somehow, contributing to leo's man-angst of being the seventh wheel. frank, who arguably has the most interesting set of powers and lineage, is basically relegated to being the muscle and hazel's (understandably) jealous boyfriend. piper... good lord. thats probably a whole other post, so i'll just say: cornucopia.

and yet, despite the disparity in characterization... you don't really feel that percabeth has a character arc or development per se. it's an odd contrast, with percy and annabeth getting a lot of time but pretty much remaining stagnant characters, as opposed to the other five who are written pretty blandly, but have valid, explicit inner struggles and questions they must face. for jason, it's being greek or roman. for hazel and leo, they want to parse their connection, even at the expense of frank, who is still struggling with his self-esteem. piper comes into her own power.

so despite being a book full of twists and turns, especially for percabeth, this is where you really feel the stakes begin to slump. decisions are being made to move the plot from point a to point b pretty straightforwardly, but there's not a ton of effort to make you invested in these characters other than what we know about them from previous books and the fact that they have a role to play in this apocalyptic second great prophecy.

but there's still two books left! the yearlong wait demands patience and creativity. surely percabeth falling into tartarus is going to make for some interesting development and impact. it was a brilliant plot twist, after all. with the darker turn that hoo was seemingly taking, there could have been so many consequences. percabeth could shut the doors of death from their side and come back alive, but come back wrong—unearthing old traumas, questioning and ultimately foreswearing their loyalty to the gods, threatening the reunification of the greek and roman aspects, etc.

and once again, house of hades... only semi-delivered? the tartarus chapters were certainly harrowing: percy choking akhlys is still a Scene of All Time to me because it felt earned, after all that percy has been through and what the series has been building up to! annabeth also having to face all the times she's been abandoned in her life, while less focused on, was also a very poignant moment for her character. they were events that seemed to push for development.

back on the argo ii, there's a continuing case of kind of low-effort writing on the other characters. frank and his mars blessing, for one; you kind of understand what rick was getting at, but... what! piper... girl idk what she was doing other than seeing visions in her dagger. leo... ue ue ue. jason commits to chb, but ofc he does because neither he nor we know/remember much about cj, so we don't really feel the loss! but there is one exception for his part, and that is of course the (in)famous cupid scene with nico, but i'll talk about nico much later.

hazel is an interesting case, so here's another paragraph for her. she gets to come into (more of) her powers just like piper did in the previous books, but from my viewpoint, it was considerably less engaged with who she was as a character compared to piper. in mark of athena, piper still struggles with being a daughter of aphrodite and how she can be "useful" as we know she struggles with internalized misogyny. on the other hand, hazel gets in touch with her mother's background... kinda? idk if controlling the mist can be considered equivalent to marie's voodoo; i dont think so. she certainly gains more understanding of her pluto heritage, too, and has this nice back-and-forth with hecate about creating her own path, but you don't really get the sense that doing so has consequences, or that she concretely shirked other paths to get where she was at.

where mark of athena fell flat with character stakes, house of hades to its credit does manage to up the ante—but only truly for percabeth. with all the resolutions to the character arcs in this book, you don't feel that the characters have anymore stakes or reasons to fight gaea other than the fact that she's still coming for them and they are in turn prophesied to defeat her. the one big thing that could be personal to them, which are the camps, ultimately fall under the purview of coach hedge, nico, and reyna, who are side characters, upgraded to main characters in the last book of a series already overbloated by shifting povs and favoritism.

ultimately, this is why blood of olympus falls apart. the best characterization work done, which is on percabeth and their time in tartarus, is in the end of no consequence and is barely mentioned. it's as if nothing has happened. all the build-up and investment fizzles out because in boo and beyond, even though they went through literal hell, they just shook it off (because accdg to rick demigods are extra resilient and don't get traumatized lmfao). the climactic face-off against gaea is headed by jason, piper, and leo, and it has no pay off. the books haven't dwelled on them as a trio after tlh because leo was too busy angsting about his love triangle, and jason's and piper's arcs, both individual and romantic, are shoddy, to say the least. to add insult to injury, leo's sacrifice is a fake-out! so he can finally shed the fucking seventh wheel arc that came about not because of a genuine exploration of how he has been outcasted all his life, but because the argo ii mysteriously became demigod tinder and also because rick thought "haha how funny that the latino is the outrageous flirt!" frank and hazel... just get shafted im so sorry babygirls T_T

what saves boo is not the cast of the seven that we have spent the five books journeying with. no, what saves boo is the three side characters suddenly made main characters because. well, fan favoritism and pandering. nico, reyna, and coach hedge comprised the only arc that wasn't an absolute slog to read through—high stakes, chemistry, and well-rounded character arcs that complemented each other. no hoo scene is honestly more heartwarming than reyna embracing nico. it makes you question if hoo's length and frankly shocking quantity of main ensemble members even constricted the narrative that could've been told, as opposed to the original intention of expanding the world of percy jackson through more povs. five books with at least 700-800+ pages each for five years. what a tremendous amount of time and energy to be wasted.

and there is, of course, the question of "should percabeth have been in hoo." until house of hades, my answer was yes. the fact that their tartarus arc fizzled into nothingness changed my answer to no. taking the whole series into perspective, if their treatment in boo was all that the hype and tension would amount to, it would've been better if they'd been relegated to side characters with mentor/helper roles as opposed to taking the spotlight away from the rest of the seven. their succeeding cameos in the other series + the new college reco trilogy makes the blunder all the more grievous.

heroes of olympus did give us a new cast of characters to love. along with all its racist stereotypes and pitfalls, it also diversified the percy jackson world. if not for the mid-2010s fandom who took up the slack of unexplored storylines and potential, these characters would be very much not impressioned on us. and as a successor to a series that was so deeply driven by family, friendship, love, and belonging, that it couldn't consistently humanize its main cast was the biggest sin.

[emblemxeno]

Cindered Shadows Thoughts

Btw if you don't wanna see thoughts on my 3H playthrough block this tag #playing fe3h

-Finished it in exactly 8 hours, at least 2 of which could've been an email /s

-It is truly a microcosm of my foundational issues with 3H as a whole, besides two things

-One is that exploration isn't as tedious because Abyss isn't as big as the monastery, but I guess that isn't really a point in its favor since that's the whole point lol

-The second is I feel like Byleth's dialogue and text selections with the characters is a bit better. There's less instances of , what I describe as "characters extrapolating how Byleth feels in 1-2 text boxes before actually responding to what they said", which I swear is a cause for why the main game reads as if it's 10% longer than it's supposed to be.

-IMO unique map objectives don't save map design that's pretty uninteresting at the end of the day.

The first map's layout is cool! Until it gets reused in chapter 4, where it's only saving grace is a new objective utilizing prior knowledge established in chapter 1. Clever, but still a reuse in a game that infamously spams repeat maps. And outside of Chapters 2 (a slog where you defeat enemies in waves which isn't fun in FE) and 7 (a cramped hall where you have to brace against a monster boss), the other maps are reused from the base game, even chapter 3 is a slightly modified sealed forest.

-Combat itself is so slow, I'm really just debating turning off animations in general when tackling the main game. Not only do the animations take forever, but they don't look interesting, are surrounded by washed out textures and models, and-my personal biggest grievance-have absolutely no momentum nor weight behind them. The Tellius games, from what I've seen, yeah the animations take decades, but from a visual and sound design point, fighting feels significant. 3H also being sandwiched between Echoes (the gorgeous culmination of handheld 3D Fire Emblem presentation after half a decade) and Engage (which to me set a new, high bar standard for 3D FE presentation going forward) is an extremely unfortunate situation and I feel really sorry for it.

-Music still hits though, Shackled Wolves never gets old

-Another thing that 3H does that this DLC reminds me of is the amount of -Stand Around- cutscenes there are. It confused me that Engage gets the most heat for this, when this game does it more, due to more drawn out dialogue, simpler camera angles, stiffer models with fewer animations, and an absolutely diabolical background setup. For a game with an expository selling point, it repeatedly falls short at being engaging in a visual sense, with its scenes always being saved by the phenomenal voice acting. Almost always, at least. The scenes where the Wolves are getting their blood drained while they just stand there is so jarring and bad, it's nearly funny, when it's obviously not supposed to be given the lines, their delivery, and the accompanying music.

-The story from A to B is sweet I guess, but given that the devs said the Cindered Shadows version of events is basically non-canon to what happens in the main game sours me on it. Like, yeah it's cool that the Wolves can technically be capable enough to do it offscreen on their own, but then what's the incentive then for me to recruit them beyond the player's pre-established care? There's no narrative payoff in the grand scheme :/

-Also the whole plot is "what if Yuri, Rhea and somewhat Claude/Linhardt do everything and also these other goobers are here" which became really funny, because after a while even the lines had characters deliberating the sheer amount of coincidences and melodrama that was occurring. 3H style writing shoved into an 8 hour timeframe is accelerated, exhausting nonsense.

-Sothis not being in the plot is fine, because even though it doesn't make sense why she wouldn't comment, it's not like there's anything of value she would contribute beyond her usual schtick of "bratty banter, where are my memories, i sleep now".

Not having Jeralt though? Absolutely ridiculous. I don't like Jeralt as a character (he's my idea of pretty face and that's it), but there's no convincing me why he couldn't be here but Alois can. Love Alois! But he was a device used to have the Knights on standby and nothing more, which Jeralt could've done and it would've let him have a proper impact on the ordeal with Aelfric.

Speaking of which, revisiting this DLC had me thinking... wow this love of Aelfric is veering very close to cult-like, and it's cut short after chapter 5 because we don't go back to abyss once that map's done. I'm left with wondering how the Abyss denizens would feel after knowing that their caretaker was Like That™️, which is a completely foreign feeling to me when discussing 3H's narrative since the game normally never lets it be remotely unclear how the characters or the player should feel about anything ever. So... props for that for making me flex that part of my brain! You did it Fodlan, the creepy custodian plotline that was left dangling was great fridge horror material.

-The constant suspicion throwing and animosity towards Rhea and the church is tiring as usual, and also sometimes downright baseless. Like, at one point it's said that orphans are among those who are relegated to Abyss or otherwise ignored on the surface which is flat out not fucking true, Rhea literally takes in former bandit kids and Remire orphans, what are we doing here.

-Balthus has a cringe "fight the system line" meanwhile he's an irresponsible jackass pushing 30; Constance is written like a joke; Hapi's writing is a joke; Yuri is as incomprehensibly competent and storied as ever and I love that cuz it's nonsense.

-Overall, not godawful terrible, but nothing in it that's worth coming back to in my eyes.

[just-a-carrot]

Just want to preface this by saying that it is merely a question/possible suggestion and not at all anything supposed to make you feel pressured/expected to do(i wouldn’t dare haha)

But I was thinking about how we see the entirety of Our Wonderland through Iggy’s perspective. Importantly so, I think. Alot of his character development interlinks symbolically with parts of the narrative so he is arguably the best viewpoint to experience the story from

BUT I do wonder whether we might see any side games like Save the Last Dance which explore events from other character’s POV, especially events Iggy was not privy to(ie was simply just not there for). I think it would be interesting to not only see how things we didn’t get to see directly unfolded, but also explore more of the inner workings of some of the minds at play in the narrative. Idk

ahhhh... that would indeed be interesting! i'm not sure it's something i would ever do, as i feel like i'm kinda done with the "events that happen in game" and would prefer to explore things outside of the game more... but it's interesting to think about since it's true that we only ever see things from iggy's perspective

i feel like stld was the one place where i'd already been super curious about exploring it more and thought it would benefit from having another perspective even as i was writing arc 2 (ok except for the one place in arc 5 where i had to cheat and pull away from iggy's pov one time for the sake of the narrative flow LOL). there aren't really any other places that super stand out to me as "dang i would love to explore this from another pov" though perhaps that's just because i tend to have already envisaged what happened behind the scenes a lot of times in order to then write the follow-up scenes so to me i've already explored them in my head hahaha 🤣 that and to me there are some things that work much better if they aren't actually shown, because people's own imaginations would probably come up with better scenes than anything i could ever write (particularly if it's something horrific) or if i purposefully would rather leave it vague/up to interpretation, as there are specific parts of the story that are like that to me

hmm... yeah i'd have to think about it!! since i don't have any scenes off the top of my head that i would do. but it is really interesting to think about the possibilities!!

[seraphimumbra]

My Amrit Doobay opinion is that I don't particularly want him to be written differently and I don't think it would necessarily make him a better character. A better person? Sure.

But him being obsessive, thinking he knows best and thus being disrespectful, controlling, creepy and overstepping all of her boundaries is fitting right alongside the rest of his personality.

I don't want him to suck less, I think he makes for a very enjoyable character as he is. One can enjoy gutting him like a fish or leaving him alone to rot in his pathetic misery or maybe even join him in his insanity depending on the mood. Whether or not his actions were forgiven and ignored by the narrative is thus a bit more complex to comment on since it becomes a path issue.

Amala joining him and moving past all of of his actions is not the same as the narrative doing that. This is the same Amala who has justified a lot of mass murders along the way, who has experienced a lot of traumatic events quite recently and we have been outright told by the narrative that she is going a bit insane.

If this person justifies his actions and decides that she wants to spend her life with him, that doesn't translate to the narrative saying that it's the correct or healthy thing to do. It could means that she did it anyway. She wanted to. She didn't care.

I don't think he was a failed morally gray character per say, because I don't think he was meant to be written as that kind of morally gray character in the first place. He was very outright on the wrong side of things about several issues. Characters who only do 'bad' things for the greater good are fine and good but characters can be wrong about what the greater good is, or about how they should go about it.

They can also have their own flaws outside of the trolley problem debate. Not every flaw has to sit nicely in the morally gray box where this was a bad thing done for good reasons. This was a bad thing done for bad reasons actually and the reason is that this person sucks. This same person had a distinct goal when doing that other bad thing though, arguably a good enough goal. Not every action has the same reason. Characters whose motives and actions are nuanced are fun.

So, I find Amrit Doobay to be a fun character to play with, not necessarily just in the scenarios provided to us in the game. What would happen if she got him arrested and took over the Dozen for herself? If she tried to kill him but he survived and now is sitting there analysing what just happened via his delusional lens, his entire worldview crashing right onto his head.

The self victimization that would come with any scenario of Amala not wanting to play along his schemes and instead doing something of her own. He might fancy himself the last do-gooder, the only one who knows what needs to be done, thus making everyone who goes against him not only dumb but dangerously so - a rabid dog that needs to be put down. Would he also admit to himself that it is out of vengeance, it is for fun, or would it just be 'the necessary thing to do'. His loneliness and deranged expectations from Amala to be his divine soulmate - all of these things make the dynamic interesting to explore to me - in several different ways, not necessarily including them actually being together in any shape or form (well, except for the thread).

All in all, yes he sucks and yes he is fun to explore which easily makes him an enjoyable character to me because I want my characters to be interesting more than anything else. It's fiction.

[thebroccolination]

KRIST CAN’T LIE AND IS RIDICULOUS ABOUT SENPAI: VOLUME #39,573

In 2019, Singto starred in He’s Coming to Me opposite Ohm Pawat. It’s really underappreciated, and I highly recommend it. Singto is the cutest ghost in the whole afterlife.

Now, for additional context:

In early 2019, Singto was twenty-four, Krist was twenty-three, and the World of BL was Different. Branded pairs were a thing, but not like they are now.

SOTUS in 2016 saved GMMTV from bankruptcy and changed the industry. As I understand it from interviews with Krist and Singto as well as accounts from fans who were there at the time, although KristSingto were staggeringly popular, GMMTV saw SOTUS, Krist, and Singto as individual cash cows. BL wasn’t a money-printing hashtag-focused influencer lifestyle yet, so GMMTV seemed to hedge their bets. They made a thousand SOTUS events, pressed Krist into Leading Lakorn Man where the stable, dependable money was at the time, and kind of let Singto do whatever. Plus, Krist and Singto had different managers (Yui for Krist and Jane for Singto) and different interests and goals as far as their careers: Krist loves music, Singto loves photography, Krist wanted to be a musician, Singto wanted to be a director, Krist wanted to branch out into new areas of entertainment, and Singto wanted to study directing in California. They were able to be KristSingto: Kings of Couples, while exploring their talents and aspirations outside the growing expectations of a branded pair.

In an interview with Attitude in 2018 to promote their episode of Our Skyy as Kongphob and Arthit from SOTUS, Krist and Singto said they’d follow GMMTV’s direction as far as their series went from then on.

But Krist didn’t have to be happy about some of those directions.

One of the first things I learned about Krist as a person is that he was very, very vocally possessive of Singto when he was younger.

Go search “KristSingto jealous” on YouTube and enjoy the feast. They were both possessive, but where Krist utilized pouting and looking generally miserable, Singto would just calmly and physically remove people from Krist’s vicinity.

When Friendzone aired in 2018, Krist famously told interviewers with a maybe, possibly, half-joking sulking smile that he didn’t want to watch the series because he didn’t want to see Singto with other men.

(And then interfans disingenuously edited and recontextualized the clip so it would seem like he said he didn’t want to watch men kissing men…y’know, the thing he’s famous for. And proud of. And won’t stop telling people about. For years. Mr. “Please Let Me Play the Top” Mr. “Please Tell GMMTV You Want to See KristSingto in Another Series Together” Mr. “This Man’s Lap Is My Pillow and So Is This Man’s and This Man’s” Mr. “Please Ship Me and Gun” Mr. “I Asked Off for Permission to Sexy-Dance with His Husband”—mmmm.)

Now, before I show this clip, I just want to say that this was years ago and Krist has always loved Ohm—he’s just ridiculous about Singto. You thought I was exaggerating the “sulking and looking generally miserable” thing, didn’t you?

Seriously, go watch some things on YouTube. With popcorn.

[And before you think this was just a Krist issue, Singto one thousand percent encouraged it by openly thinking it was cute.]

[Prachaya, stop tormenting the turtle.]

Like, this isn’t a shipping thing, and he’s (mostly) grown out of it now. Krist is just very, very affectionate with his friends and seems to be sincerely afraid of being left behind. Famously, to make himself cry for the scene between Kongphob and Arthit in the Our Skyy episode, Krist imagined how he’d feel when Singto inevitably left Thailand to study abroad. (He ended up crying early and way harder than the script called for, and Kongphob’s surprise is at least a little bit Singto’s genuine reaction.)

Plus, y’know, Krist is and always has been a fiery babygirl of impulse, Singto is Senpai, and just. Even though their relationship is platonic, there’s a reason everyone thought they were dating in 2017, and there’s a reason that even as recent as 2021, Singto and Krist were both complaining that no one took them seriously as dating prospects because everyone still thought they were dating. In fairness, they’ve both been single since SOTUS, and they’re both ridiculous about each other, so there you go. Blame the victims. Wheeeee~ #SelectiveVictimBlaming2024

Anyway! In 2018, at what I think was GMMTV’s showcase for their 2019 lineup, Krist and Singto were together onstage, unmic’d, just standing there representing their respective, separate series.

For some reason (probably) lost to time, Krist turned to Singto and said, “I hate Qingming,” the shortened title for He’s Coming to Me.

Smiling, Singto said, “Not now. We’re working.”

Krist doubled down and said, “I don’t like it.”

In the longer clip, Krist kept sulking and Singto smiled at him with open amusement. Like I said: he fully thought it was cute and did the bare minimum to discourage it, because he’s ridiculous too.

Later, at the fan greeting, Krist was doing the typical, “Please support me and P’Sing in our projects this year,” and a giddy fan called out, “BUT YOU HATE QINGMING THOUGH HUH.”

This is where someone more adept at lying would say, “Of course not, kind fan, for I am always supportive of Senpai’s other series. I am a mature paragon of self-esteem and in no way extremely possessive of My Senpai Who Is Mine.”

Instead, this happened:

“HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT.”

WKDLSJDKSJ

K R I S T

So yes, Krist can’t lie. He’s never been able to lie. He’s pure honesty and deep sincerity and high emotion all the time.

Now, once again, he was twenty-three, he was just being a brat for brat’s sake, and he never had an issue with Ohm. He was probably just afraid he wouldn’t get to work with Singto anymore since Singto was always very open about his intentions to study abroad and then transition to behind-the-scenes work as a director, so the longer GMMTV went without giving KristSingto a series, I imagine the less likely it probably seemed to Krist, who really wanted to act with Singto again and did not shut up about it for years.

This has been Krist Can’t Lie and Is Ridiculous About Senpai: Volume #39,573.

[This is a whole other story. Have a great day.]

[beesmygod]

hmmm. was olga more "respectable" than maxine, for lack of a better word? we know she was the head of the coven, but would that mean respect from people outside of magic practitioners? or because of the way the world is set, there is not really a sharp divide between people that meddle with magic and spirits and people who dont? im asking bc i find the theme of legacy super interesting when it comes up (do people think that maxine is dragging the gottwin name through the mud? or do they shrug their shoulders bc who gives a damn about what an exterminator does and doesnt do?)

this is a good question and warranted a good answer, sorry for the delay.

there are a couple things at play here:

the position of "town witch"/coven leader was once significantly more prestigious than it is today. what used to be a position as essential as the fire or police chief has been worn away by technological advancements; her position was essentially replaced with extermination as a global business model after the rise of the cheap, electronic anti-ghost devices. maxine inherited a defunct position and failing business.

the divide between those who practice magic and those who don't is, funnily enough, the same as my view on why people make art and others don't: they don't enjoy doing the process. its messy, its complicated, it takes a long time, doesn't have guaranteed results, and it involves dead things in one way or another. sometimes it's just easier to call someone to do the process for you when you can't be bothered to work on your pronunciation of magic words. in this way, a witch is sort of like a plumber or a mural artist. explicitly for hire to do something you don't want to deal with yourself because it might be out of your skill range/take too long to learn the skills. so olga's reputation did suffer a little bit from the irrational public assessment of extermination as a "messy" business.

there's also an unfortunate stain on the gottwin name that maxine inherited long before her grandmother died: her father ran away from home in his teens because he and olga fought viciously and publicly. no one heard anything else about him until he died, and it was a surprise to everyone (including olga) that maxine even existed at all. so the rumor mill started churning: what did olga do that upset her son so badly? by the time olga died, people seemed to understand that the family was cracked beyond repair; behaviors that were more acceptable in the decades before the events of the comic were looked at in hindsight as painful and cruel. and since maxine, public nuisance, was the end result of olga's work it's hard for the public not to lay the blame at her feet.

so, maxine is caught in a sort of weird nostalgic hell where people can simultaneously tut-tut her for not being enough like her grandmother or for being too much like her. lol. this was a ramble but i hope it was interesting. im folding most of this into the comic but a lot of it i just try to keep in my brain when writing and thinking about them both.

ive been thinking more and more about olga as we approach parts where we're be flashing back to maxine's childhood and approach the next (final?) book. "books" are the huge overarching storylines as opposed to individual chapters, so there's still a lot of AGS to go. i want to explore character motivations so much i just need the power and energy to do so again.

[navree]

I'm constantly baffled how many writers seem to overlook and mischaracterize Jason when he has arguably the most potential of all the Batkids, or at least the Robins! Like, so much can be built upon wrt his life as an impoverished youth and how that informs his perception of vigilantism, law enforcement, drug abuse, etc. Hell, his resurrection itself is something he had over the rest of the Batfamily for the longest time, before everyone else got a take a turn and it became so overused that Jason's own trauma became a footnote. Alas, most people at DC just treat him as the "Angsty Bad Boy™️" who doesn't play nice with the other kids. He's so wasted, Jason Todd deserves better.

I've always felt that if you're going to try and write a finite narrative out of Jason's story (as opposed to comics) then at some point he should quit vigilantism. His entire adult life has been solely about that and, as someone who for a long time was most famous for dying, he should get the opportunity to live, especially for himself. BUT, so long as he remains a vigilante, he offers a really interesting perspective on vigilantism that you don't really see anywhere else.

Jason, like some of the people I feel have the most reason to be in this life in Batman media (such as Bruce and Dick), has experience being a victim of criminal behavior, yes, but he also has the experience of being on the other side of the window. He knows the criminal element intimately, and from a young age. His father was a low-level criminal, it got him sent to jail and eventually murdered while in jail; Jason grew up in a low-income neighborhood that has been by and large overlooked by Gotham and that allows criminal behavior to breed there to the point where the name Crime Alley no longer refers to a singular event (the murders of the Waynes) but all the other issues there; Jason himself has committed criminal acts when weighing the option between obeying the law and ensuring his own survival. He has a different perspective on criminality and law enforcement and outside enforcement of legal codes than anyone in his life, because he's lived on both sides of the lines and they've both had profound effects on him and should shape how he views the world differently than other people he knows.

Jason's vigilantism, and honestly even how he deals with stuff during his crime lord era, should be motivated by at once knowing that issues don't pop up out of nowhere and that even criminals have interiority, but also a deeper understanding than most as to how the actions of criminals affects not just innocent bystanders but innocents in their own lives. It's a unique perspective that not only enriches Jason as a character but can also provide some pretty thought-provoking conversation about vigilantism and Batman's role in the world and even the concept of extra-legal justice we find in most superhero comics in general that DC could honestly use.

Like yeah, ok, I did find Stephen's monologue about his role as a doctor being that of a healer at the end of the General Strange arc in this year's Doctor Strange hokey, but the way a superhero's personal life informs their actions as a hero is an interesting concept that only gets shallow explorations most of the time, and Batman media could really use it in more depth given how shallow people's understanding of Batman is (Batman's a capitalist Batman's a fascist Batman beats up the mentally ill Batman victimizes the poor, dear God shut up).

And when it comes to Jason's death, it is pretty obvious that, when it comes to the Batfam, DC is trying to recapture that feeling that came with A Death in the Family every time they kill a character off, to try and tap into what made Jason's death such a big thing. But the problem is that they fundamentally do not understand why Jason's death was so big.

For one, and the most shallow reason for it, Jason's death wasn't just death. At the tail end of a series of difficult issues for him, like finding out his dad was murdered in prison and Bruce lied about it, to the debacle with Felipe Garzonas, to Bruce benching him as Robin (which, given that Dick being benched ended with him no longer being Robin and leaving Wayne Manor, it's reasonable to infer that a formerly homeless kid who experienced a significant amount of trauma due to that homelessness would start to worry that no Robin=no longer being able to live with Bruce and having to live on the streets again), Jason ends up trying to find his mother. And when he finds her, this adult woman, who he should be able to trust, if only because she's a grown woman and he's fifteen, deliberately leads him into a trap with someone he is deeply aware is dangerous, points a gun at his head, and tells him that what's about to happen is his fault while he tries and fails to fight his way out of what he knows is going to be a really bad set of minutes. Honestly, more people need to read ADitF, because the sequence of events is a lot more horrifying than pop culture remembers it. Jason is already beaten into the ground by Joker's henchmen before the Joker gets started on him (while Sheila stands back and watches, God) and by the time it's done, half of Joker's suit is colored red instead of purple to represent blood and everyone in that warehouse thinks that Jason is already dead. And then he gets blown up. Jason's death resonated so much not just because of the fact that it happened, and that Bruce felt upset about it, but also because what happened to him was horrifyingly brutal and to date remains one of the truly most sadistic things the Joker has ever done.

For two, Jason's death had an impact because it was meant to stick. Unlike Bruce getting lost in time or Damian getting stabbed, where it was pretty clear that the characters were not going to stay dead, and then by the time you get to Dick and whoever else has died recently, where the audience (and the characters) have no reason to believe that this will be permanent, Jason's death was meant to be the end of the story. Due to Starlin's hatred of Jason as a character (which is weird) and DC in general wanting to move away from kid sidekicks at the time, Jason was supposed to die and then stay dead forever; there's a reason why the saying was "nobody stays dead in comics except for Jason Todd, Bucky Barnes, and Uncle Ben", because he was meant to, you know, stay dead. It hits because the audience itself, along with Bruce and Dick and Alfred and Barbara and everyone else in Jason and Robin's life, thought that this was the last we would see of Jason Todd alive and that he would never come back ever again. It's also why his resurrection packs so much more of a punch than anyone else's either, both in universe and out of universe.

For three, Jason's death was greatly helped by the meta-narrative in a way that nobody else's has been. Because, the eighties was a period of a lot of change for DC, and especially for Batman due to the popularity of The Killing Joke (which wasn't even supposed to be canon, yet by the time Jason died Barbara was already confirmed in canon to be paralyzed and therefore have the events of that book take place) and especially The Dark Knight Returns. Which means that the eighties was when people started writing darker Batman stories, and they kept going from there, and the characterization got darker along with it (seriously, read something from the early eighties and then something from, like, the 2010s, the difference is insane) as Batman slowly just because a darker and more sullen character. And because that change coincided with Jason dying, and there was an initial attempt to push a sort of "Jason's murder is turning Bruce into a crazy person" message to really show audiences how badly Bruce was dealing with the situation, it creates this sort of in-universe progression where Jason's murder fundamentally altered Bruce in a way that has, so far, proven utterly irreversible.

It's not just that Bruce's son was murdered and that he's had to deal with the grief and trauma of that loss, it's that the grief and trauma of that lost basically completely shattered Bruce and he is never going to be able to put himself back together again. He is never going to return to who he was before Jason died even though the initial hurt has literally been reversed because Jason was resurrected and subsequently re-entered his life. Jason's death was so calamitous, so monumentally awful, that it changed who Bruce was as a person in a way that can never be undone or reversed, and most of the people in his life these days don't even know what Bruce was like before, while the people who do know just have to live with the fact that Bruce as he was then is as dead as Jason was (this fic by @damianbugs really gets to the unique tragedy of the whole thing so go read that). None of the other Batfam deaths have that, not even Stephanie's, which was also meant to be permanent before it got retconned, and so they don't hit as hard because they not only don't have much impact on the audience, they don't even have much impact on Bruce as a character, certainly not anywhere near that Jason's did in both intensity and longlasting effect.

The problem is that DC didn't really didn't expect Under the Red Hood to be as popular as it was, so they kept Jason around without really knowing what to do with him or having any plan for him, which is a choice we're still feeling the consequences of today in that they both still don't really know what to do with him and really resent him for it, along with his longterm popularity in all of his iterations. And fandom itself likes to just hew to tropes with no basis in canon whatsoever based on the shallowest understanding of all characters, including Jason, so that's not even helping matters much, and why I stick to my own bubble.

[bigirlsdontc5y]

My thoughts on Marie, Jordan, & Halloween

If they don't do a couples costume...

Jordan is definitely the type to pretend they’re chill about Halloween when they’re absolutely not. If someone asks about their costume beforehand, they’re like, “I’m not going.”

Spoiler Alert: They go.

When (not if) they go out, their costume is most likely a character from an iconic video game or action movie. I can see them as Lara Croft, which is a great choice, because the costume is super slutty in both forms. Or they show up in a yellow tracksuit with black stripes on the sides, and when people inevitably say, "Oh, you're the bride?"

They’re like, "No, I'm Bruce Lee in Game of Death 🤨"

They chose their costume, specifically, to throw people off. It's a fun little game they play. But Marie guesses correctly on the first try, and Jordan is a little annoyed for the rest of the night.

Anyway, Jordan wins the costume contest with a costume they started working on at 9 pm the night before.

Marie, on the other hand, is 100% a last minute costume person. The only reason she’s dressed up is because Emma asked her to. And by dressed up, I mean she bought a cat ear headband from Walgreens for 5 dollars on her way to the event. Emma is going as a sexy mouse or Alice (of Alice in Wonderland), so they technically match. Just one person put effort into their costume, and the other person still has the tags on theirs.

If they do a couples costume...

I had a lot of different ideas when I was theorizing this. At first, I wanted Marie as Claudia from IWTV(2022). I feel like Marie would find a lot of comfort in her character. Claudia, like Marie, did not get to experience girlhood in the same way as her peers. Choices they could not make for themselves took it from them. Marie was given compound v as a baby, and they turned Claudia while she was unconcious. Both instances made them into something their family members were disturbed/afraid of. (This is me advocating that someone get to work on a Claudia & Marie edit.) But I eventually decided I wanted to do a couple's costume, and Claudia does not work with that.

Because I was still very attracted to the idea of Marie as a vampire, I stuck with it. I wanted to do something with classical monsters because the tropes they come with have so much fascinating symbolism.

Vampire novels, to me, are about hidden desires. Vampires are creatures that take what they want when they want it. Usually, it's an analogy for general hedonism, queerness, sex, gender ambiguity, etc, etc. The main character of a vampire novel is often disturbed by their desires, needs, and inability to control when they engage with those needs.

Jordan and Marie feel a certain amount of insecurity and discomfort around their powers. There was a time when Jordan didn't shift unless necessary, and Marie believes her powers make her a danger to society. Their discomfort harms them more than helps them because their powers are a part of their identity. Those characteristics make them conceptually aligned with the vampire.

Another choice, in line with the theme of identity and uncontrollable compulsions, was Maren and Lee from Bones and All.  But I felt like Lee wasn’t a character that Jordan would be interested in embodying.

Eventually, I settled on Marie being a vampire and Jordan being a werewolf. Werewolves share a lot of themes with vampires, but there’s one key difference. Werewolves explore ideas around transformation. Sometimes, their transformation is permanent, but usually, the werewolf is in constant movement between being a werewolf and being human.

Werewolves are about a fear of the true self. It’s the idea that being free and exploring things outside the mainstream will hurt other people. Being different from the masses makes you a danger to society. This story is preached to a werewolf so often that they believe it themselves. They take desperate measures not to shift. Even though said measures harm them.  A werewolf is depicted as being in constant emotional turmoil because they’re not “strong enough” to prioritize the needs of their community over themselves.

The werewolf's experience mirrors Jordan's experience. Their parents, ex-partners, and Vought tell them their identity is too confusing. That their identity is hurting their relationships. And that their identity is hurting their career. They tell Jordan that if they just stayed a boy, their life would be better. But Jordan knows staying a boy would be a disservice to themselves and their happiness.

Jordan putting on the costume of a werewolf is their form of reclamation. They take it on as a symbol of what they used to be (afraid of themselves) and contort it to their current feelings of who they are. Jordan’s Werewolf is about being yourself, being free, and making your own decisions.

The couple's costume Is 100% Jordan's brainchild, and Marie just agreed to go along with it. They go as a nerdy vampire and a werewolf jock. Their costumes are a fun twist on 1950s youth culture. While they’re visually mainstream, taking on the role of a monster separates them from it. The 1950s was a time when the policing of gender and sexuality was at an all-time high. Playing these characters for Halloween is a fun, transgressive experiment.

With that, I’ll walk you through each mood board and explain some of my aesthetic choices.

Marie’s preppy vampire has claw-like nails. Her teeth are sharp and uncomfortably white. She wears a neutral-colored button-up with a knit vest pulled over it. On her feet are a pair of unstylish black oxfords and fuzzy red socks. To keep her hair out of her face, she dons a ribbon or headband. A pleated skirt and leather belt tuck in her top. Blood paints her face.

The costume includes a brooch. Which is in reference to the 1950s youth culture practice  of “getting pinned”. It implies that Jordan’s Werewolf and Marie’s Vampire are dating. I chose a pin that incorporated pearl with Jordan’s Frankenstein pearl necklace in mind. So it’s less of a pin and more that she has a piece of Jordan attached to her knit vest.

In her hand, Marie holds her school books, which she ties together with a brown leather strap. The book strap calls back to an era before backpacks were popular. It solidifies the time and place of her costume.

Jordan's werewolf has recently gotten into a fight. The skin around their stark yellow eyes is a dark, discolored purple, and there's a gash across their nose. Blood drenches the front of their crisp white shirt. They styled their hair after jocks of the 50s. By that, I mean (too much) gel helps to form perfectly placed curls .

For their ears, they have prosthetics that make them appear larger than they are. The ears add an extra amount of scruff to the otherwise clean-shaven look.

On their neck, Jordan has two bite marks. The implication is that the marks are from their vampiric girlfriend, Marie. I decided to include this aspect in their costume because I get the vibe that Jordan is the sort of person who engages in PDA. They like people to know Marie is their girlfriend, and the faux bite marks are a new way for them to do it.

I heavily considered having Jordan wear their signature bomber instead of a letterman. But if I went that route, it wouldn't be of a costume. So, Jordan is sporting a blue letterman jacket to solidify their werewolf's role as a jock.

(Bonus - Cate is a siren, Sam is Chucky, and Andre is a loser.)

Happy Halloween,

bigirlsdontg5y

[saltyr3mix]

wiatt nicholson head canons plz

ok. Wiatt is very similar to Damien to me. In the sense of oh boy, I hate writing this character so much. It's a quartet of Damien, Norman, lewis and Wiatt. Hate all of them/j they each have their ups and downs. Mainly downs but like- Lewis is by far the easiest of the group but still so far behind the others in terms of effort to write. Especially when paired with Wiatt. TGE ONLY TIME IVE EVER WRITTEN WIGHLIGHT AND WAS SATISFIED WITH IT WAS THAT ONE LIKE 10 LINE SCENE IN FEBRUARY 4TH WHERE THEY APOLOGIZE TO EACH OTHER. IT IS MY GREATEST FLAW. I CANT WRITE WILIGHT AND IT HAUNTS ME-

but this isn't about them! Just Wiatt! So let's get started on it!

To learn from the tragedies: he's do stressed. Let's this guy be. He just wants to help his boyfriend but also doesn't have a clue what's going on. He thinks he knows everything. He doesnt. At all. He's sort of the main focus of book one but is a lot more background in book 2, which focuses more on Sara. Both of them are technically going through the same thing but because Sara was the villain is treated a lot differently. I sometimes think about what would have happened if lewis hadn't explained things to Waitt. And instead he and Sara teamed up to get answers and everything would have been fine. But no, lewis is far too dramatic for that.

Shattered dreams: he dies. womp womp. Does become Guide! (Gaslight. Useless. Idiot. Dead. Employee) But I think I'll talk about him more in the Oc au because I think despite it being nearly the same situation he's more interesting there.

One shots/you'll live until I die: I thinkkkkk her appears like once in yluid and it's like- the least relevant scene in the fic i was just trying to even out the perspectives. But in that and other one shots he's sort of just a mechanic. Almost never more apparent than that. Try to keep it close to cannon, he likes helping people but tends to mess it up a lot but never enough to be fully blamed for it.

I will make them create my world: don't. Don't talk me. I- I'll figure it out! (Has over 10k of scrapped shit THAT US JUST HIM. The reason there hasn't been a new chapter since February is Because of that man and how hard he is to write and plan)

Buried masks: I think I've made a few post on him but he stays outside the basement because Sara doesn't like him. He helps Damien with his investigation and is highly suspicious of Sara. Eventually he does get more involved for a big event! But that is major spoilers :3

Swap au/skating in silence: he plays Norman here! Which I find very interesting. Not interesting enough to have concrete ideas for it but enough that if given the chance i could see myself exploring. Wiatts like main thing is he feels worth through helping others. And by directly helping Lewis he'd really enjoy the job. If lewis was different from Sara and still have him praise and carted about him it would honestly create a more toxic relationship than canon because Wiatt would be left clinging for Lewis's validation and willing to go very, very far for it.

Superhero au: he's chill. Doesn't have any powers. Is a reporter and a hero stan. Untilllll things start happening and lewis is sobbing in his apartment because he's having to deal with some very traumatized kids, and half their trauma may have accidentally been his fault and he knows the heros are all a massive lie and starts giving wiatt info about some of the more horrible things the organization has done and wiatt starts a character arc of now speaking against the hero system and trying to in mask it for what it is! Mostly he just appears in the background, he's sort of the symbol of the general public, being powerless and living a mostly normal life.

Steven universe au: he lives in his car as a photographer. He enjoys life and specifically lifes mysteries and the unnatural. He fines this fenced of beach that has been rumered to be haunted after a man died mysteriously several years ago. Wiatt never followed the rules and climbs over because the view from that clean of a beach must be stunning!

And bam! Rock Aliens. They all scare each other but wiatt has a camera and the aliens don't know what that is and they think it's a weapon. They explain they didn't mean to bother and humans and Wiatts like oh wait their really sweet. And he's friends with them now!!! He gives everyone their more human names and let's them experience life. So far he's the only human that doesn't get experimented on so that's good for him. He is a little overwhelmed by dating a space dictator that fake killed himself but it's ok, he'll figure it out.

Maze au: he's human. Don't know how he got in the maze. I can imagine him playing a role similar to Kyle in the sense of like, he's here to help and try his best not to get into anything but is not going to sit around. He's probably a runner. Not a very good one. Maybe he stays in the back and makes maps. He and Oliver team up to make most of the clearings.... Everything. They make weapons and tools and supplies and help build housing and food they are the progressives. They make sure the clearing is constantly improving.

Oc au: he dies! Not to litho though cause we accidentally took him out. Instead he dies to jot! In a....messy scene. Both because there was a lot of blood and two it was written late at night and neither of us really knew where we wanted it to go only that wiatt needed to be dead by the end of it. So mans got straight up beat. Joy crushed this dude with her bare hands. The virus actually took out two....well killed two people by technicality it knock loli out for a good while but she's fine now! Yeah, we made it slightly more deadly just for fun. And now Wiatt is a tour guide with amnesia! He loves the company and works mostly in the lobby with Dot. Star also had his memories erased in this au.

Instead the whole what about love speech, was joy about carly. Which Winnie being already connected to Carly made it a lot easier and so roller gays are doing fantastic and wighlight is struggling.

We have yet for star and guide to interact but I'm looking for to when they do!

that should be ittttttt. He plays a background character in most of the aus. So not a ton to say.

Thank you for the ask!!