#or the memories he has with atsushi specifically.

[hesperidia]

can we talk about this line. can we please talk about this line.

i've a half-assed theory here: Bram bringing Aku back to life via special vampire powers (and him keeping vampiric traits, apparently) meant that he gets to start over as a near blank slate, with only the primal instincts (more or less) of protecting Aya and the rest (or how Bram and now Aku called them: Princess and commoners) because that was Bram's last order. However he does not have memories of anything prior, hence "who the hell are you?"

2- He is messing with Atsushi in order to fool Fyodor. (unlikely scenario) But the way he used to speak all old timey and polite-ish until he faced Atsushi and was instantly rude caught my attention. Maybe his "not hatred" for Atsu trascends everything after all

[an-insignificant-flower]

Tasogare no Hauringu 黄昏のハオリング

Music and lyrics by Imai Hisashi

I think there has been some sentiment among some (certainly not all) fans that Imai's headstrong optimism and push forward can sometimes seem cold. I have long suspected that's more of a cultural clash, as in the west, a man who doesn't shed tears is doing it to keep a "stiff upper lip" because of the underlying belief that emotion is weakness (except for anger, of course). However, while forms of toxic masculinity do exist in the east as well, you're just as, if not more, likely to run into a motive to keep everyone together, and to not shed your own tears so as not to spread sadness further. I always felt such was Imai's motivation, especially after his tender speech at the 2023 Genshou performance.

I had been thinking that I wish Imai would show his sorrow a bit more. I think it's a vulnerability fans need to touch as much as for his own message of "Be Happy" as for the validation of their own tears. After all, if the man who can find contentment in this hell can also mourn, than can't we who mourn also be able to find contentment?

If there was any remaining concern that Imai might not be capable of tears, publicly or privately, this song blasts them out of the waters.

The Twilight Howling

Tasogare, as a modern term, refers to the time between sunset and night. An older version of the same word, tasokare, refers to the time of night when it has just become too dark to clearly see others' faces. In the Chinese zodiac counting of the day, it falls during the "hour of the dog" (7 p.m. to 9 p.m.) when he takes his place to guard the gate.

While Japanese has many words for dusk or twilight, tasogare specifically also has a colloquial use as an expression of melancholy or nostalgia. As with twilight in English, it can refer to one's "twilight years."

Though I wouldn't say it necessarily applies to this song, but it does to the rest of the album, tasogare can also be used metaphorically to mean that, while the brightest time is past, there is still enough light worth pushing a little further.

And there in just the title alone we have a coming darkness, the inability to see the face of even a friend, the loyal guardian, melancholy, nostalgia, physical decline in aging, and the drive to continue regardless. Now on to the lyrics themselves...

オーロラの地へ　魂のパレード Oh Flyaway ōrora no chi he　tamashī no parēdo　oh fly away

to the land of the aurora, parade of souls, oh fly away

Okay, so, I'm already a hot, sobbing, facial tissue-consuming mess; how is everyone else???

Right off the bat, we know the album has been leading up to this song from the very cover. The aurora as not simply a visual metaphor, but here a lyrical one, specifically the parade that Acchan has ascended to, and the one we all will eventually join.

3000年後の　荒野に立て Oh Memory sanzen nen go no　kōya ni tate　oh memory

standing in the wilderness 3000 years from now, oh memory

Narratively, the lyrics here are less clear, but I'm inclined to see it as the end of humanity, that we as a species as much as we as individuals will leave nothing but a memory, with nature returning to take her place where our cities once stood.

エンジェルの群れ　虹色　風 Oh Flyaway enjeru no mure　niji iro kaze　oh fly away

a flock of angels, rainbow wind, oh fly away

More metaphoric descriptions of the aurora as the place where Acchan and all other beloved souls must be.

薔薇の下　獣たち　Oh Oh bara no moto　kemono-tachi　o-oh

we beasts under the rose, oh

In 2018, Sakurai Atsushi completed a performance in very obvious pain. After apologizing to the audience for not performing his best, he was rushed to hospital, where he was found to be bleeding internally from a gastrointestinal hemorrhage. While in recovery, he penned Kemonotachi no Yoru, ("Our Night" with "our" meaning "we beasts"). A few lyrics near the end of that song imply his promise, for the sake of his fans, to never leave the stage: "Dance for me, Pierrot / Tonight you stay on that stage till the end" (trans. by Cayce). If such was Acchan's intention, then it was in this song that he predicted his own death.

Kemonotachi ("we beasts") here means as much the remaining members of the band as the entire fandom, and "under the rose," the literal translation of "subrosa," the Latin meaning "done in secret," is the unique connection we share, having loved so dearly the one we all lost together.

黄昏のハウリング　歌うように　歌うように　Oh Oh tasogare no hauringu　utau yō ni　utau yō ni　o-oh

the twilight howling, like singing, (like a song), oh

Using the base noun "song" twice would probably be the more natural choice, if only to avoid the repeating continuous -ing form, which is not as it appears in the Japanese.

There's also an implication that what we the audience hear as music, and have heard throughout this album, has actually been the sorrowful cries of a lonely pack this whole time.

黄昏のハウリング　哭いている　咆えている tasogare no hauringu　naiteiru　hoeteiru

This line has two translations. If you're just listening to the lyrics, you might assume naiteiru and hoeteiru are 泣いている and 吠えている, which are the common characters used for those words, leading a listener(-only) to hear:

the twilight howling, crying, howling

with the second howling being the typical Japanese word for the howl of animals. However, with the very specific and uncommon characters used, the meaning is closer to:

the twilight howling, wailing, yowling

While the common "crying" with 泣 very simply means "crying" with no particular nuance, the "crying" with 哭 is a noisy cry, a wail, a sob. It implies uncontrolled emotions and a demand to be heard.

Likewise 咆 can mean "howling" like its common counterpart, 吠, but this roar, this howl, has a distinct undertone of violence, anger, or rage. There is no good direct translation for this one in English. Any word animalistic enough isn't dangerous enough. Any word dangerous enough isn't animalistic enough.

Harkening back to the previous line of "sounding like a song but (is actually) howling" we have a line that sounds like simple "crying, howling" but is actually far more gut-wrenching and unleashed.

From here on out, we repeat the previous lyrics:

オーロラの地へ　魂のパレード　Oh Flyaway

3000年後の　荒野に立て　Oh Memory

エンジェルの群れ　虹色　風　Oh Flyaway

薔薇の下　獣たち Oh Oh

黄昏のハウリング　歌うように　歌うように Oh Oh 黄昏のハウリング　哭いている　咆えている

Oh Oh　歌うように　歌うように Oh Oh　哭いている　咆えている

🌌

This song is only ever so slightly slower than Mudai and follows a similar chord progression. Sakurai has never clearly revealed what he intended for Mudai's message to be, but personally, I'm inclined to see it as the horror and confusion of being brought into existence—a trauma many of us never really recover from—and the inclination to pursue the darkness that once felt safe. From darkness we come and to darkness we go.

Even without interpretation, the theme of birth in the song is obvious. How poetic then, to end the album mourning Sakurai's passing with such an homage to it, reminding us that death and birth are part of a (painful) cycle.

After lyrics such as these, the sound of Imai's guitar ends on the same tones as ended Mudai, more discordant, more painful. A furious and heartrending howl you would almost mistake for a song.

[illugremlins]

I have a lot of fun making headcanons to add a grey aspect to the morality of objectively good (in he sense of morals) characters.

For example, Atsushi Nakajima. He values the lives of everyone and thinks that everyone deserves a chance to live. Unless he is put into a situation where he has no other option, he considers taking a life to be, objectively, one of the worst things someone can do. To the point where he firmly locks out the memory of him killing Shibusawa even though it was an act of self defense to keep him alive.

This is an ethical train of thought, and specific and special to Atushi since he is one of the very few characters of BSD who believes it.

A conclusion can me made:

Atsushi is good. He cares about others lives. He thinks everyone should have a chance to live.

But, if we look into it more, the belief isn't as 'good-intentioned' as it can be initially read. Atushi hates himself. He firmly believes the world would be better off without him, and that everyone else is more worthy of living than he is. However, despite this, Atsushi isn't suicidal. Being suicidal would, in my opinion, be entirely out of character for him. Yes, he does not really value himself or his life because of his upbringing, but Atsushi still desperately wants to live. He wants to survive.

In that case, how is it fair of him to want to live when his life is worth nothing compared to others? What right does he have to live if people who matter more than him, who are better than him, who are more valuable and useful, don't? (And again, to remind you, in Atsushi's eyes, everyone is more useful than he is.)

So, what if I re-frame the conclusion:

Atsushi is selfish. He cares about others lives because he cares about his own. He thinks everyone should have a chance to live because he wants one, but the only way he can swallow the guilt of wanting to be alive is by doing everything in his power to make sure that the people around him, who are all better than him, are alive too. If they are dead, why isn't he, who does not matter and should not matter?

Re-thinking characters in this light makes for a much more interesting read of the story and a lot of good material for fanfiction. (And it doesn't have to just be characters in morally grey stories, like BSD. This sort of thinking/adding of HCs can be applied to much more light-hearted mangas/works like Haikyuu, where the worst the character can be is a bit of a bully or jerk.)

[kunikiiida-kuuun]

BSD Locations- Yokohama Visit 2024 - Part 4

It's getting close to the end with this one! Finally I get to talk about THE station from the OVA and obviously I have a lot to say about it LOL.

Links to all the parts:

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 5

20. Yokohama Stadium (S1EP9)

Only a few minutes walk from Nihon Odori station. I couldn't find the part with the name of the stadium for the life of me and I was also worried about it getting dark soon so I couldn't match the anime screenshot at all hnnhhh. I tried to walk around but I obviously went in the wrong direction lmao.

21. Port Opening Memorial Hall (S1EP9)

Also called Jack's Tower, about 5 minutes walk from the stadium. It's nice that most of the places are located quite closely. It's a really pretty red brick building!!

22. Motomachi-Chukagai Station (S2EP25/OVA)

The station where the OVA aka my favourite episode of all time is based. I think I was positively vibrating with excitement at being there, that too at a subway station ASJFKDKFJ.

I took a train from Nihon Odori station to Motomachi-Chukagai station because I wanted to land up at the platform itself lol. Otherwise the station is approximately 10 minutes walk from the Yokohama Stadium.

It seemed like the signs had been updated because they looked pretty new, but otherwise it was easily recognisable from the OVA!! I was so impressed, especially with how even that specific wallpaper was matching so closely with its anime counterpart. If I had enough time I would have spent time looking for the ~exact~ spot from the anime.

The train and the seat colors are obviously different, but in the anime Kunikida was boarding a local train to Shibuya, and coincidently, even this train was headed to the same location lol.

OHMYGOD THE ESCALATORS. I was in utter shock when I realized this platform was not one, but THREE FLOORS DOWN IN THE BASEMENT. So now we know Kunikida doesn't skip leg day because he climbed three floors in like 30 seconds with a ticking bomb on his hand. Considering how accurately every location has been depicted in the anime, I'm sure even this detail is canon in the BSD universe and I have no doubt that Kunikida is definitely physically capable of doing something like that. Everything about this man is so impressive hnahfkglsjfj.

The pink ticket gate is the same and I love that even the Daily Yamazaki store colors match the anime counterpart lol.

In the last image, Kunikida is looking in the direction of Motomachi street, the same street from S1 when Dazai was supposed to bring Atsushi to the agency for his entrance exam and run into Kunikida, as well as that time when Kunikida and Atsushi were looking for "Yamato Nadeshiko" and run into Higuchi in S3. Kunikida probably walked down this very street in the OVA when he announced he was leaving the agency and headed to this station.

So my personal theory is that the ADA office is probably located quite close to this area!

Genius Tumblr user psylunari made a remarkable post here with all the sufficient evidence regarding the same theory, so make sure to check out that post as well!! :D

23. France Yama (S2EP21)

Located in a park just next to the Motomachi-Chukagai station. The flight of stairs I had to climb to get here killed me (my legs were literally feeling like lead at this point and I was considering ending it all lmaooo).

There isn't really a lot of open space here, as in the anime, and it's quite difficult to match the first image because there wasn't any place where you could sit and look at the windmill.

Just below France Yama is America Yama, this Rose garden where Fukuzawa was taking a walk in S2EP21.

Regrettably, I missed this spot because I figured I'll return back after visiting the next spot (because I didn't want to climb back down and up again.) But the sun was already setting and I was already losing daylight at this point, so I had to move on. :')

I think this park also further corroborates my theory about the ADA office being located near Motomachi-Chukagai station. I could see Fukuzawa coming to this park close to the office for an evening stroll after work and it would also explain how Atsushi was able to find him there! (Maybe he frequents the place and had seen cats over there before, and that's why he had cat food on him ajdlslfsjk). It's close enough to their base too, and seems good enough for a meeting with the Mafia!

Recreated the scenes from the OVA with my Kuni-mochi hahahaha ((I was so embarrassed doing this in the middle of the station lol pls ignore how the second pic is out of focus))

Only one more part of the Yokohama Pilgrimage to go!! Please look forward to it!! ✨

[hermy-97]

i find it so funny in that ep where atsushi attempts to make a deal with fitzgerald to prove the ada's innocent (i forgot the specifics) where atsushi's all like

"wow he's so powerful i can see why he's the head of the guild"

MY GUY- YOU LITERALLY HAD A WHOLE ASS BATTLE WITH HIM ON THE MOBY DICK

then atsushis like "wow now i remember that he's the guy who attempted to crash into yokohama with the moby dick"

YOU WERE ON THE MOBY DICK WHEN HE WAS DOING THAT-IT WAS YOUR MISSION TO STOP HIM

there are literally so many more instances where atsushi has convenient memory loss lmao

[sunnikos]

Day 4: Mentorship

Hello! I am participating in Dazai Birthday Week 2024. This is Day 4! I am late once again but don’t worry because this one’s really good I prommy 🙏

TW: Depression, suicidal thoughts.

This fic contains some Kunidazai and background Shin Soukoku if these parings are not for you, then please do not read further <3

2k words

Enjoy the piece, and stay tuned for the next one!

| Day 1 | Day 2 | Day 3 | Day 4 | Day 5 |

Taking on Atsushi wasn’t in Dazai’s plans. The very boy taking on Kyouka wasn’t in Dazai’s plans. Finding a new reason to wake up every day wasn’t in Dazai’s plans. So many people refuse to let him die, which is very annoying. But.. maybe that’s what it’s all about. Perhaps this is why Odasaku wanted Dazai to become a good man. Dazai was bound to die brutally in the Port Mafia. You can’t trust anyone there. Dazai doesn’t know how he ended up trusting three people. His mistake.

Although it’s not such a mistake anymore,. It hurt more than anything in the moment. Yet, now that he has his people… he can’t imagine just- giving it up. He wishes Odasaku didn’t have to die for him to have this. He wishes Odasaku could’ve had this. Now all he has is a memory of him and his ideals. To think Dazai would’ve let Atsushi suffer the same fate as him if he’d gone off and died like he planned. And for what purpose?

He would never really justify Odasaku’s death. But it had a butterfly effect. To put Atsushi through that pain with no rhyme or reason? It feels wrong now, like an untuned guitar being played on stage. While Dazai isn’t perfect, he tries more or less to ignore the call for death. It’s not as important as what he has now. Giving up isn’t his choice now. It will always be an option, still, he’s proud to say he has picked joy. He’s picked Kunikida’s nagging, Ranpo’s bragging, Kyouka’s queeries, Kenji’s silly supportive texts, and Atsushi’s appreciation.

His phone buzzes, and he can tell right away that he doesn’t want to answer it. It rumbles some more, and he flops over, ignoring the device. Ten minutes later, he hears a gentle knocking, instead of the violent door assault that Kunikida is privy to. Who have they sent to fetch him this time? He was doing fine with his internal revalations, if he has to actually put them to practice so soon he will actually grow nauseous.

“Dazai, may I come in?” says Atsushi from outside the door.

“Hmph.”

Atsushi politely lets himself into Dazai’s dorm.. huh, Kunikida must’ve given him a key, and sits down on his legs and gently prods at Dazai’s shoulder.

“C’mon, I need your help.”

“Get Ranpo to do it.”

“He’s out today.”

“Oh, yeah. Well, you’re out of luck then!”

“Dazai,” Atsushi says, lowering his voice and looking around to check that no one is listening in, “I need your help specifically..”

“You have thirty seconds to make it interesting.”

“Ineedhelpwooingaportmafiamember.” Atsushi says in one fell swoop.

“What?”

“I need your help wooing a Port Mafia member..!”

“Wow, I didn’t know it was getting serious with the Port Mafia’s rabid dog,” Dazai begins to mock, “you kids grow up so fast!” he declares.

“Dazai,” Atsushi says through gritted teeth, “be quiet.”

“Ahhh, I see how it is~” he teases.

“Shut upppp, seriously, just help me out..!”

“Fine fine, so the first thing you’re going to do is…”

—

“Kyouka, to what do I owe the pleasure?” Dazai throws on an overexaggerated smile and crosses his legs. It’s not that he dislikes Kyouka, not at all. He simply doesn’t know how to talk to her. She’s not very expressive, so there’s nothing for Dazai to bounce off of.

“I need help with using the stove after work today.”

“I see..”

Kyouka stares at him. He stares back, both waiting for an answer. Dazai’s head is swimming with questions and anxieties about how this conversation could turn out.

“Right,” Dazai stalls, “I’ll help you with the stove two hours after I’m off the clock..” he looks uncertain but finishes anyway, “does that work with you?”

“Yes.”

“Alrighty then..!”

God, that was awkward. Dazai wishes his life had ended four years ago, so he’d never have been responsible for such a conversation. How does Atsushi deal with the embarrassment? Wait.. Dazai might have prepared his colleague well enough on his own for dealing with embarrassment, huh.. Whoopsie? Well, no! Actually, Dazai did him a favor, and now Atsushi is a pro at having conversations with Kyouka. He may have unknowingly made his young coworker surpass him, but to be fair, there was no one to be a Dazai to.. Dazai. So he had no clue how to handle this embarrassment now.

By the time Dazai comes to, Kyouka has already gone back to her workspace. Why had Kyouka even asked him for help? The hopeless detective eats almost exclusively canned crab! He has no real experience with a stovetop. Fuck okay, Kyouka would normally have asked Atsushi but he’s been busy with his budding romance lately, (thanks to Dazai of course) and hasn’t had time to teach Kyouka life skills. But still, Dazai? Why on earth would she come to him for help. Was it.. perhaps because Atsushi.. trusts him? So she does too?

Wait no- that doesn’t make any sense! Kunikida is always the more viable option! Right, Kunikida. He needs to drag that man away from his work (heh) and force him to teach Dazai how to use a stovetop in time to teach Kyouka everything she needs to know. This is his moment to +..｡*ﾟ+shine+..｡*ﾟ+

He needs to go bug Kunikida RIGHT NOW! Dazai saunters over to Kunikida’s seat and drapes himself over the man.

“Kunikiiiiidaaaa,” the badaged man whines, “I need your help right now, it’s dire! Urgent! My life depends on it!” ”Dazai, leave me alone, some of us have things to do during the work day.”

“Kunikida, you don’t get itttt, I need your help for realsies!”

“What are you bugging me about, Dazai, spit it out.” Kunikida wears an unimpressed expression.

“Soooooo-”

“Get on with it, Dazai.” Kunikida’s irritation is palpable.

“I maybe need to learn how to use a stovetop, hehe?”

An exhausted self-restraining sigh forces it’s way out of Kunikida, “Dazai, you are banned from cooking for a reason..!”

“I know! But Kyouka asked me to teach her how, and I can’t let go of this opportunity to bond with herrrrrr!”

“You’re still not allowed in a kitchen anywhere at any time!”

“Well, hang on now, you’re a bit too quick to say no-”

“Dazai!”

“No wait, hear me out!”

Kunikida facial features morph to convey an expectant expression, but he lets Dazai speak.

“You supervise and teach me how- I promise- I won’t leave your sight. I need this to be safe too.”

The idealistic detective raises an eyebrow, but eventually accepts.

“Great! So we can start now- wonderful!”

“Wha-”

And with that, Dazai drags Kunikida to the agency kitchen. Kunikida’s anger ebbs and fades away as he watches Dazai actually pay attention and put effort into learning. Kunikida drills patience and constant vigilance into Dazai as he teaches. These are essential to cooking on a stovetop. Kunikida’s sure Dazai would even be taking notes if that brilliant brain of his wasn’t storing the information like a computer hard drive.

Once Kunikida has taught Dazai all the basics, he remembers he has a job to do. However, Dazai uses the man’s panic to drag him away again, this time to a grocery store.

“Dazai what are we doing now?” Kunikida groans.

“Shopping!”

“Any other hints?”

“I need to get the stuff so I can teach Kyouka.”

“What stuff?”

"Oh, you know..” Dazai avoids the look Kunikida shoots his way, “stuff! Like pots and pans! And also something to stir with.. and a wisk, and.. other stuff..”

“Are you telling me that on top of your dorm being entirely unfurnished, it is also devoid of cooking utensils?!”

“Ding ding ding!”

‘How have you made it this long?”

“I wonder that very question myself oftentimes.”

“Ugh, shut up, let’s get your stuff, bandage squandering machine.”

“Yay..?” comes Dazai’s weak celebration.

They grab their items, and afterward, Dazai calls her and asks what her plans are regarding food and recipes. She had no idea what to do, so Dazai and Kunikida handled it. Aka, searching for recipes in the car and driving somewhere else to get the ingredients. Once their shopping trip is over, Kunikida finds himself following Dazai to his dorm and setting up. When Kyouka arrives, she doesn’t even question Kunikida’s presence there. She just nods and makes her way inside the barren-looking dorm.

Kunikida doesn’t know why he stays, he ends up helping Dazai teach Kyouka. She’s an excellent student. When their night of cooking is over, Kunikida and Kyouka are cleaning up.

“So what made you want to learn about cooking, Kyouka?”

“Oh, I already know how to cook.”

Kunikida pauses and turns to her, “Then why did I teach you how to cook on the stovetop today?”

“I wanted to get you and Dazai alone together because you have a lot of unresolved tension and it’s getting ridiculous,” Kyouka remarks, “and Dazai really needed to learn how to cook, Atsushi’s getting really worried about it.”

Kunikida binks and processes before he nods, “So you were killing two birds with one stone?”

Kyouka nods this time. Kunikida lets a pleasant silence wash over them, stays back when Kyouka leaves.

“She was scheming to get us together, I’m pretty sure.” Kunikida chuckles.

“Oof, yikes, a little late for that.”

“Perhaps we should have disclosed our relationship to our coworkers when we started dating.”

“Bah, they don’t need to know, besides, it’s still new! We deserve some privacy, neh?”

Kunikida shakes his head, grinning all the while.

—

Kenji is a sweet boy. A sweet, kind, observant boy. He notices when Dazai isn’t doing too well. When his mental health is dragging him through his days. He also notices that Dazai is making an effort to allow himself to be helped. He’s quiet about it, but Kenji can tell. He sees it in the way Dazai agrees to meet up at a restaurant to celebrate a recent case, even though Kenji can see that Dazai is sluggish and would much rather be in bed, sleeping through every bad thought he’s ever had.

A simple conversation with the president allows Kenji to take Dazai with him to the fields. He says it’s because he needs help with the crops. While they could always use a helping hand, Kenji’s real goal is to get Dazai out of his somber routine. Teaching him about the beauty of life and death through farming is the perfect change of scenery! Kenji even got some farm clothes for the lanky man. Which is sort of hard to do when you’re a farmer, because everyone is toned from the labor.

Still! He managed! And the clothes are only a little baggy. Just slightly. Dazai is smart, but manual labor is not his strength, but that doesn’t stop Kenji from praising up a storm! Because really, Dazai is trying hard, he can see it. And while manual labor is important, Kenji knows that applying ones strengths can do wonders to break them out of a spiral. So the blonde farmer asks Dazai to consider using that big brain of his to make the process easier. And it works! Dazai found a much more efficient way to do farming while still getting the satisfaction of doing the work. Dazai learned so much! Kenji couldn’t be prouder. When Dazai returns to Yokohama, he’s brighter, and definitely exhausted from the farm work.

When he returns, he takes a couple of days off. One can imagine Dazai’s confusion when he answers his door and sees President Fukuzawa there with some thick paper, brush pens, and some ink. The silver-haired man is let in, and he asks if he might attempt to do some traditional calligraphy with him. Dazai agrees, and is still quite surprised by the suddenness of it all. He spends the next few hours calmly working next to Fukuzawa, who seems much more familiar with the practice than him. Maybe it’s just a small thing, but the calligraphy isn’t so bad, and perhaps he wants to try more of it, just for the sake of it. So he asks Fukuzawa for some tips. The president offers him a gentle smile, so he guesses he’s doing okay.

[that-fangirl]

Today I came across an interview Atsushi had, back in June 2019. And there was a specific part of it that almost gave me shivers.

"―― Right (lol). Our conversation has taken quite a turn but whether it’s about being healthy or about being able to perform on stage, neither can go on forever. I believe that is what you got to feel firsthand this time.

S: Yeah. How long I can keep doing this…… I thought about things like that. Especially recently when there are those who choose to voluntarily retire. Although, of course, I, too, wish to keep going as long as my body and my voice permits. But, well, it’s not something that is within our control. If we can sever off what naturally happens, it would be easy but that is rarely the case. Because being born human, we have emotions, and memories, and blood relations after all. It’s difficult to sever things away. But despite that, time still goes by. Right…… Very recently, I decided that I would do whatever I wanted to do. And I wouldn’t do what I didn’t want to do.

―― You’re saying this in a positive light.

S: That’s right. Because, really, just recently, a friend who I’ve known for 30 years passed away. He went suddenly and it felt like, ‘…… Ah, that’s it?’. That person lived his life as he liked, so I guess that was one thing my friend taught me.

―― Was your friend sick?

S: Nope, he suddenly collapsed. Cerebral haemorrhage or something. Mm…… It was a little too abrupt. Even now, it still hasn’t sunk in though."

It feels rather strange to read this interview and to find the similarities, doesn't it?

Either way, I believe for most of us, it still hasn't sunk in that he is gone. But I also think Sakurai-san would want us to live our lives to the fullest as we like.

We still miss you, Sakurai-san. It still hurts. But it will get better some day...

[marichild]

👀 50 + dazai-ango (hi this kavi <3 gestures at the pairing and goes well obviously)

HII KAVI !! ngl I giggled a bit when I saw what the 50th song was on my list but I managed to come up with something by picking a specific bit, and also somehow merging Vibes lol. (here's the spotify wrapped fic ask game for anyone who's curious :3)

whoopsie that got a bit long

#50: Dazai Osamu, Sakaguchi Ango, & Voices of the Chord by Sawano Hiroyuki

Hunger for the sleep I know will never come

Crowded is the space but don't have anyone

I could read the bible to drown out the hum

Avoid the voices of the chord

Ango finds him when he’s sleepless, sometimes. He’ll come out into the balcony and stand beside Dazai, making no comment of his precarious perch on the railing, legs swinging over the abyss.

“You’re disturbing the neighbors,” Ango says this time, at the rhythmic thump of Dazai’s heels smacking against the metal bars.

“Boo-hoo,” Dazai replies. Ango is most likely aware that Dazai would probably stop if anyone else asked. “Go away, Ango.”

“You’re in my apartment,” Ango deadpans, and Dazai scowls. He’s not allowed to talk like they’re back in Bar Lupin and nothing is wrong. He does have a point, still.

“Why are you awake,” he asks instead of starting another argument he knows Ango won’t engage in. Venting his anger and misery is less satisfying when the other person just takes it. “It’s three A.M.”

Ango doesn’t say anything for a bit, so Dazai leans to a side, grins with false cheer, “nightmares plaguing you, Ango?”

He doesn’t expect for Ango to sigh and say, “far more than the average person, I’d expect.”

He draws back. Doesn’t know what else to say, because acknowledging that Ango has nightmares and can’t sleep and won’t turn Dazai away because he still cares about Dazai is a level of humanizing him that Dazai refuses to accept.

He bites back a crazed giggle and snarl and turns away. Breathes in and out. He wants to know what Ango’s dreams are like. He refuses to think about it—

“I think,” he blurts out, “I’m forgetting what Odasaku looks like.”

Silence. Absolute, still. And then, “I wouldn’t blame you. Time is a fickle thing. So are memories.”

Including my memories of when you left us to die, Dazai nearly snaps back, but he’s better at self-control than that. But Ango is right, is the thing.

What are memories but a bare collection of sights and sounds? What are memories but a series of events that blur out the details as the clock ticks on, ceaseless?

Memories are fickle—Dazai knows this. He can scarcely remember what truly happened, even with his capacity for large amounts of information. He remembers the utter horror, the sobs that had torn at his throat before he shoved them down, Oda’s blood staining his hands and bandages, tacky and rust-brown-red. He remembers how warm the blood had been, before it had grown so cold.

And he remembers how much he’s hated Ango since. Always that. Every other thought leads back to Oda, to Ango. Because he’d loved them, he thinks. He’d loved them like he’d never loved anyone else before in his short, bleak life.

He sees tomatoes on sale and Atsushi’s complete lack of hesitance to eat them because he’s just happy to have food, and he thinks of Ango’s stupid fucking tomato juice. He steals Kunikida’s glasses to piss him off and he remembers the time he’d stolen Ango’s glasses when he was seventeen and broken them and remained unrepentant because Ango and his irate scolding was really too funny and endearing for him to feel bad.

So—where does that leave him, leave him and Ango, in the aftermath of a hundred and more bad decisions and a hundred and more ways Ango keeps redeeming himself and proving that—

“I don’t remember what he looks like fully, either,” Ango admits.

Dazai thinks of falling over the edge. He thinks it’d give Ango more nightmares.

(Does he want to?)

bonus lyrics:

All the roads inside my head loop back to you

I've done many things I'd thought I'd never do

It's you that I can feel

But I keep my hands

Upon the wheel

I turn the page to drown you out

You are the only thing that I still care about

If I can heal the conflict that's within

I'll know the war has reached its bitter end

[lnkedmyheart]

Call me delusional all you want but...

I think Dazai giving Chuuya that gayass goodbye speech and then trying to drown him may have a reason. Chuuya was clearly vamped before the speech and drowning. Its entirely possible that he is still vamped and the normal eyes were just foreshadowing or a hint.

We know that Aku is able to control himself because of his promise to Atsushi, therefore we know that the vampirism allows some level of influence from their bond to seep in.

Now we know that corruption usually involves Chuuya's consciousness and control taking a back seat and him killing without discrimination. Friend and foe all are at risk. However we also know that Dazai is always nearby when he uses corruption and Dazai is never injured even when the whole building blows up etc. Of course Dazai might just be super great at dodging or staying out of Chuuya's way.

But I have another theory. In Dead apple Chuuya manages to scream out Dazai's name in the middle of corruption when it has gone on for long enough for him to murk a dragon. He then not only proceeds to actively look for but also find Dazai and then he manages to be gentle enough with his punch mid corruption to only snap the pill in Dazai's mouth and not his neck or spine.

I feel like Chuuya fixates on Dazai during corruption and it subconsciously ensures that he wont end up hurting Dazai and this would also lead to Dazai being able to save him without being at direct risk. There is no guarantee that it would work but its a risk they both take. This fixation idea seems logical to me because not only does it reinforce Chuuya being very human and never being a fully mindless killing machine even in the midst of going berserk, it would also set the stage for the skk duos subconsciously trusting each other.

Onto the current arc and Dazai's speech. Dazai and Chuuya had not directly interacted till that point in Meursault and Dazai used the comms to basically let Chuuya hear his voice which would in theory possibly help him fixate on his voice. By invoking their connection with the intention of triggering Chuuya's memories of them and specifically him Dazai might be attempting to get him to remember him in particular. Because Chuuya has undying trust in Dazai and fixates on him during corruption its entirely possible that Chuuya would be able to recognize him when they do meet later much like how he does during corruption. As for the eyes and his ambiguous vampirism, I dunno how likely it is for Fyo to be so ignorant of Chuuya possibly having been cured during the drowning, on the other if he is still under Bram's influence, maybe the clear eyes and no fangs in that crucial drowning shot was foreshadowing that Dazai's attempts to get him to fixate on him again had worked.

So now that he has potentially triggered Chuuya into fixating on him, he drags himself to the area under surveillance and gets Fyodor to send in Chuuya to kill him. A Chuuya who we know refuses to actually hurt Dazai even during corruption.

[asher-agere]

um um

caregiver atsushi with a little with ptsd,,,, projecting hard but sometimes i just want someone who understands me if not thats okay sorry to bother you

@atsumrow (so i can find it later)

Your request’s are never a bother! I loooove seeing proof that people like my writing (And my general atmosphere apparently? (๑﹏๑//)) and I love getting to write things for people to enjoy! Especially something like this that helps someone feel understood!

Also warning, I do not have PTSD, my writing will be based off of research and what we’ve actually seen from Atsushi in the show. If anything I write is inaccurate or offensive please let me know and something will be done!

Caregiver Atsushi + Little with PTSD

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

☆ Atsushi has PTSD of his own, so he’d definitely understand what his little one is going through! He’d ask what event led to them having PTSD to better understand how to help them. But he wouldn’t push! If they don’t wanna say he won’t ask again! If they do tell him then he’ll gently hold them and rub their back to soothe them as they talk. He’d never judge! He’s always there to offer support

☆ Atsushi has been shown to mainly suffer from flashbacks, so he’d be the best at comforting someone from that! He’ll gently hold them and talk to them, trying to gently urge them out of the flashback. Remind them that they’re in the present! They’re safe now, he’ll keep them safe, they don’t need to worry about a single thing. Not when Atsushi’s there to protect them! And Byakko helps of course! Mama tiger wants to protect her baby too

☆ On the topic of Byakko… Atsushi definitely uses his ability to help calm the baby down! I mean, a giant fluffy tiger? That’s gotta be the most helpful thing ever! He’ll curl up around his little one, the loud purring helps them to regulate their breathing and to ground them! The soft fur is so pleasing to the touch! The baby just gets to lean against him and it’s so soft, and warm, and so soft…

☆ Nightmares are another big one! If Atsushi notices his little one thrashing or crying in their sleep he instantly snoops them up! He’ll quietly hum to them and shush them, rubbing their back to try and soothe them! Hopefully they’ll be able to sleep peacefully, but if not he’d rather wake them up then watch them suffer! He’ll lightly bounce them in his lap and mutter quiet gentle praise, he’ll get a pacifier to put in their mouth and he’ll coo at them, reassuring them that they’re safe with him. They’re safe now. Nothing to hurt them anymore

☆ Atsushi takes note of everything that seems to trigger his little one! If he notices they seem less enthusiastic about a specific snack, a little to tense watching something, he’ll make sure to avoid it! Even if they don’t explain, or they don’t even say that something is wrong. If he notices he’s going to fix it! Or if a certain time of year upsets them then he’ll plan distractions! For example if they get sad around New Years he’ll set up time to go visit a shrine or something, maybe a festival (๑•̀ㅁ•́๑)✧ He wants to give them new happy memories of whatever season is causing problems!

☆ So much praise and affection! Atsushi loves getting to hold his baby and tell them how much he loves them! He’ll rub their back and run his fingers through their hair, whisper about how precious they are to him, how they’re safe, how he wishes he could take all their pain away. A little baby doesn’t deserve to go through this! He just wants to take allllll the pain from them! He’d take on the pain if it meant they didn’t have to deal with it. Sadly that isn’t an option though ૮꒰◞ ˕ ◟ ྀི꒱ა So he praises them a whole bunch instead!

☆ Atsushi is always careful to explain everything he’s doing! He never wants to set his little one down, and even when he’s holding them! He’ll explain that he’s moving around so much to make them a bottle, explain that he’s putting their blankets in the dryer to make them nice and warm, explain that he’s pressing a pacifier to their lips. He never wants to catch them off guard and accidentally scare them! Always explains exactly what he’s doing so they don’t get startled

☆ Kids shows are already pretty easy to follow, but Atsushi makes sure to pick ones that don’t have much plot! Sometimes it can be tough to focus on and remember things, so if there’s not much plot it’s easy to follow! Plus that means if they fall asleep or walk away they can get back into the story really easy! Even less stress factors to worry about! Because Atsushi never wants his baby stressing out

☆ Atsushi is super patient during outbursts! He understands that it’s not like his little one is mad at him! No negative feelings are directed at him, and if they are the little one would never really hate him! Sometimes emotions can just be hard to express, he gets it! Atsushi will just calmly let them have their tantrum then he’ll comfort them! He definitely explains how what they did wasn’t nice. By no yelling ever! Just some gentle guidance!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚

I’m doing very good in my schoolwork so I got some extra time to chill out, that means answering requests! And I’m getting kitty cat snuggles („°0°„) I’m so lucky!

[merriclo]

ever since reading A Day at the Detective Agency, i’ve always wondered about Jun’ichirō Tanizaki’s entrance exam, entirely due to this quote from page 14, in which the members of the ADA are discussing ideas for Atsushi’s entrance exam.

“Democratically, huh?” Yosano raised an eyebrow. “How about we do the same thing we did for Tanizaki? How’s that?”

Yosano glanced in Tanizaki’s direction, and he instantly turned pale, shaking his head.

“I—I don’t ever…want to be reminded of that again.”

When Tanizaki was new, he had to pass what could be called a very harsh entrance exam. However, it was so harsh that all of Tanizaki’s memories of that day ended up buried deep in his subconscious. Remembering what happened would only bring underlying trauma up to the surface.

Tanizaki’s entrance was so deeply traumatic that his own mind blocked it out for the most part. this is something that is entirely unique to him, and is never mentioned again outside of this short story, if i remember correctly.

however, i was rereading BEAST, and Tanizaki does say something interesting in v.3 ch.12 [translation source here]

this may absolutely be a reach (i’m honestly just spit balling ideas here,) but maybe Tanizaki’s referencing his own entrance exam here? his wording, how he learned such a thing soon after joining, basically everything about the moment.

it also might not be in reference to his entrance exam specifically, but instead the exact moment he realized that he was a member of the ADA, as he said. it’s implied that those two moments were different for him, as well. the Akutagawa’s and the Tanizaki’s have lots of interconnected moments within BEAST, and this is one of them. it wouldn’t shock me if the moment Tanizaki fully became a detective was similar to Akutagawa’s.

i think what happened is that, either during his exam or very soon after he was accepted into the agency, Naomi was put in some kind of peril and Jun’ichirō had to rescue her, resulting in him almost being brutally killed in the process.

now, narratively, the purpose of the dialogue in BSAST is to adequately foreshadow Ryūnosuke and Atsushi’s fight on the roof. there is absolutely a possibility that Asagiri meant nothing more. it could also just be Asagiri referencing the multiple times that Jun’ichirō has had to defend or avenge Naomi in the main timeline (namely, when Higuchi emptied a clip into her back and when Steinbeck and Lovecraft were attacking her and Haruno.) but i thought it was interesting, and i have a lot of faith in Asagiri’s writing, so i just wanted to discuss my thoughts on it

please let me know your stance and if i’m missing anything at all !!

[ragingstillness]

Finally caught up on the bungo stray dogs manga today. Here are my thoughts in no particular order.

Massive spoiler warning through ch 114.5!

Gotta say, I don’t think any of us guessed “functional immortality” for Fyodor’s ability. It does explain why he’s completely crazed and has such little respect for human life. The face peeling is gross but a little funny in how wacky and wild it is. Genuine questions: does Fyodor then gain that person’s body shape? Has he ever been killed by a woman before? Or a child? Does he get to steal Bram’s height now? What happens if he turns into an old person and dies of old age? What happens if he kills himself? When was he born and when did this ability manifest? Does he gain the new person’s ability as well as his own? Also, I have to give Asagiri credit for taking the most literal interpretation of Crime and Punishment ever. The Crime is murder of Fyodor and the Punishment is he becomes you. He takes your space in society. Delightfully literal.

Gogol’s sadness over Dostoyevsky felt really real my poor clown. However, with the reveal of Dostoyevsky’s ability, they are now the perfect couple. Gogol can kill Fyodor, achieving his goal of killing him, then Fyodor can become him, achieving Gogol’s goal of losing himself and Fyodor’s goal of having one less person constantly trying to kill him. Poetic cinema.

Gonna be laughing forever at Mori gluing the fake vampire teeth into Chuuya’s mouth and Chuuya’s inability to get them out. This is especially funny because this genuinely happened to me with my mom one Halloween and while we did get them out I was picking glue out of my teeth for a week.

I hope Bram isn’t gone forever because his relationship with Aya is beyond cute.

Is Aya’s dad that grumpy police detective? It looked like that in her vision.

I’m still not super satisfied with Fukuchi having good intentions. He’s been far too sadistic and blatantly evil for me to change my mind on him now. Little Fukuchi I can defend but I’m not changing my opinion on adult Fukuchi.

Fukuzawa stays the smartest man, taking the sword to the heart then pulling it away with him. Very “can I keep this” when someone gets stabbed meme of him. Also using it still as a blade? Inspired. All hail silver fox dad.

Ranpo is clearly still injured but doesn’t seem as injured as Asagiri teased us with. Aku still appears to be a vampire, we’ll see how that turns out.

Damn, Fukuchi will not die. This man has been bleeding from the neck and heart for several minutes at least and still is talking.

Considering the last ability singularity nearly destroyed all of Yokohama and the world, not looking forward to the results of a three-part singularity.

Fukuchi’s blade allowing him control over a small period of time I could accept but the gift of prophecy? Specific prophecy too? Kind of came out of left field, I don’t like that without knowing more about the sword’s creator.

Let’s be real, One Order should just be destroyed, it’s hella dangerous in anyone’s hands.

I don’t think we got told in advance that Bram’s sword combined person with ability. Maybe I just don’t remember but I don’t think so.

Fyodor’s goals continue to be murky as hell.

Convenient, that Fyodor’s ability also comes with a bit of teleportation, as he got from mid-Europe to Japan right quick.

I still need to know more about the war and I despair of ever receiving that info.

Love that all this is going down between Fyodor, Fukuchi, and Fukuzawa (too many fs) and Atsushi is just there like oh right I have a main character oops. I really hope vampirism wipes Akutagawa’s memories so he just jumps into this situation completely discombobulated, it’d be so funny.

When will sassy grandpa (Mori) return from war?

Hey Natsume what’s up, think maybe this is a good time to intervene?

Where the hell is Kouyou?

[starlightshadowsworld]

Given Fyodor is the one who sent Shibusawa to Atsushi, and knew he was in the Orphanage.

And that his whole goal is to get the book, the thing Atsushi is the guide for.

I don't think it's too far of an assumption that Fyodor might be behind Atsushi being in the Orphanage in the first place.

The fact he's an orphan and placed in this specific Orphanage.

Given the religious imagery and the fact it's ran by a man who was deeply affected by the war. And takes that anger and hatred onto others.

Doesn't take a genuis to think that treatment would be especially harsh on a gifted child. It would test the limits of Atsushi's ability and keep him contained.

Until the right time, when he can be kicked out. Make it to Yokohama (presumably lead by the tiger which is why Atsushi thought it was chasing him. Because that's where the book is.)

And have a bounty placed on his head that will send the Port Mafia and the Agency searching for him.

To deliver Atsushi on a silver platter.

Also, Atsushi was abandoned by his parents and left in a bin... Someone found him and bought him to that Orphanage.

And Atsushi has memory loss, who's to say it wasn't Fyodor and Atsushi just doesn't remember. He's yet to see the man face to face.

That would be wild tho... If Fyodor not only placed Atsushi in this Orphanage and was the reason he's an orphan.

Fyodor's been pulling the strings from the beginning, I doubt Atsushi wasn't caught in his web from the start.

[be-not-defeated-by-the-rain]

Kenji headcanons

Okay so first he has dissociative amnesia so his memory just blanks and gaps lot of the events since his friend died and just in general

Audhd(self explanatory)

transmasc (his village didn't really have a strong concept of gender anyways tho)

Dyscalculia- so he's not great at anything to do with numbers or amounts or distance or direction or anything adjacent to that

So he actually would get lost probably as much as Ranpo except he's constantly asking people on the street for directions (it helps him make friends)

Has absolutely been scammed many times before because even in bartering he does not know easily how to tell a fair deal

Does not know how to tell time at all if you ask him what time it is he'll say something like 'still light out'

Technically doesn't live in the agency dorm (his main job is farming afterall) but he does grow plants and flowers outside the dorm because he want his friends to have some nature with them in the city

He also tends a smaller garden on top of the ADA building roof (like in WAN but I think he does more that that eventually)

he really likes bugs and spiders.

High pain tolerance (that boy has been shot and stabbed and works hard in fields he knows how to withstand physical strain and injury(not that he gets injured often(if he's hungry or angry most blunt force things cant injure him unless they're from an ability and also neither can animal bites)(if his ability is strong enough at the time he can also have some resistance to non-ability based stabbing) slicing/slashing affects him like anyone else)

He's a bit of a "I know a guy" person for everything. Even like majorly concerning things that this child should not know a guy for

Sends weird city things back to the village (like stop signs and lunchables and a scooter and a manhole cover and a security camera and a flashlight)

His body doesn't know how to metabolize foods or drinks with too much sugar or artificial stuff in them or overly processed foods so eating or drinking them with make him really sick

Also cannot handle spicy food. He can handle spice, just not spicy

On the subject of food: he has really unhealthy eating habits (will only really eat at night before going to sleep(if his poor internal regulation skills don't make him forget he's hungry) or if it's with other people after he's done everything he needs to do)

Will take anything his friends say as gospel if he doesn't already know otherwise.

Drinks milk straight from the carton like a madman

Strong tight hugs(boy is restraining himself to not hurt peopl, unless it's Dazai. Dazai he can squeeze)

Does not like overly loud or cluttered noises(unless he's causing them)

Accidently gets the ADA in trouble for so much collateral damage.

His parents are fully still alive (he was mostly raised communally though, a lot of things in his village were group efforts)

Fully does not to hesitate to ask for help when he needs it but because he's oddly capable on his own he often doesn't actually think he needs it unless it's specific things that he already knows he's not good at

Very overconfident in his ability to physically withstand things

Not very curious if it's not city related actually. He's content with his own knowledge. (Widlife documentaries are like cocomelon to him though, he will not look away)

tends to be either really late or really early to things. No in between

He has so many freckles

After his friend died he developed claustrophobia and a fear of drowning(though the latter isn't as strong as the claustrophobia)

Bites his nails and pencils and erasers and stuff

Gets sick pretty often. His immune system isn't used to being around so many people and the new environment

He can cook really well from scratch though (like literally bro can make flour from wheat)

Can't really use most technology well.

Not a headcanon but just a timeline reminder: Kenji joined the agency two months before Atsushi

Back to headcanons:

Kenji only got his ability after his friend died(I'm still tryna timeline this. Kunikida says the flood was "a long time ago" but Fukuzawa investigated it and found Kenji and Kenji looked the same and I doubt he found him then left and then awhile later was like "hey let's go back and get him actually" so I'm tryna decide when exactly it was. I like to think maybe 4 months before the start of canon and 2 months before he joined max? Idk id love feedback)

He doesn't remember the days surrounding his friend's death either

His memories resurfaces about a week later after the wreckage of the house was already clear and the villagers wouldn't tell him the details of how it had happened except for how he had saved them from the flood

Would break stuff on accident a whole lot way more often before joining the agency and passing his entrance exam like it was a very very common occurrence

accidentally hurt a number of farm animals this way, some chickens got worse than that cuz tiny

Spent a lot of time sleeping for the first bit because normal eating schedule would knock him out three times a day and also because he was scared of hurting people

without his ability he's still pretty fit because his strength ability is a recent thing but since getting it his actual body has slowly been getting weaker and weaker(and as he loses muscle mass, has also been losing weight at an unhealthy rate, not that his eating habits help with that)

Gets really bad motion sickness in vehicles

Uhhh other stuff I'm forgetting

[serialadoptersbracket]

Round 2, Match 59: Fukuzawa Yukichi vs. Optimus Prime

Submitted kids:

Fukuzawa Yukichi: The entire detective agency (in order of acquisition— Ranpo, Yosano, Kunikida, Dazai, the Tanizaki siblings, Kenji, Atsushi, Kyoka)

Optimus Prime: Bumblebee, then depending on continuity, Cliffjumper, Smokescreen, Arcee, Sideswipe, Sunstreaker, the Aerialbots, Sari Sumdac, Jack Darby, Miko Nakadai, Raf Esquivel, and possibly others

Propaganda under the cut!

Fukuzawa Yukichi:

1. “At about 32 he used to be an bodyguard for hire who only works alone then he met this 14 year old (Ranpo) who had no parents and was kicked out of the police academy. He ended up feeding him (I think Ranpo was homeless at this point not 100% sure tho. He is also a genius estimated iq as high as 200) and said he would help him free of charge (bodyguard) if he called. He ended up getting called and investigated something with him. Ranpo saw the world very plainly and cried to Fukuzawa about how scary it is. Fukuzawa helped Ranpo realize that not everyone is pretending not to know things they literally don't know what he does (big issue with Ranpo partly what he was crying about too i think. They have an entire episode (i think it's the first one in the 4th season) devoted to their backstory together which is black, white, and gray when it's from Ranpo's perspective until Fukuzawa helps him realize this and it turns colored. Fukuzawa ends up deciding he wants to create a detective agency (working with others!) with Ranpo not yet tho we still have one more kid first. Later when Fukuzawa's doing a bodyguard job he along with Ranpo end up rescuing a girl (Yosano!) from the man he was guarding (future mafia boss currently a doctor). Yosano ends up becoming a doctor for the detective agency when it's created. After it's created he ends up taking in another 14 year old (Kenji).

He also loves cats and has shoujo anime-esque cherry blossom flashbacks with his old childhood friend who asked him if he wanted to go to fight in war with him, Fukuzawa denied his request. They also have a like 15 min soft-lighting conversation while watching their memories of their childhood together in the latest ep.”

2. “This man literally created a whole detective agency for this one really smart boy (Ranpo) and taught him that he wasn't the one in the wrong but everyone else when he couldn't understand people. Then, he saves Yosano from the trauma this other guy was inflicting on her and brings her to the Agency. The Agency basically becomes the place where all his kids are. His special ability lets those in the Agency control their abilities so Atsushi and Kyouka don't have to be afraid of their out of control abilities anymore. He cares so much for all of them and during the Cannibalism arc when his life is literally on the line, they do everything in their power to save him.”

3. “My guy just CANNOT stop adopting kids. He went from lone wolf assassin to Dad of Many. His first (adopted) child, Ranpo, basically forced him to adopt him (he was like “I’m a teenager with no family or home. You GOTTA adopt me. Because I say so.”) From there he kept accidentally adopting every orphan he came across. Honestly the detective agency is more like a glorified orphanage except they let their kids carry guns.”

4. “A former Goverment assassin who stopped once he realized he was starting to enjoy killing people, Fukuzawa is looking for a job when he bumps into Ranpo, a genius capable of figuring out any mystery, who can’t understand how the world works. Taking Ranpo under his wing Fukuzawa tries a white lie that Ranpo has a special ability and manages to let Ranpo interact with the world without fear for the first time in years since he can know understand the problem wasn’t everyone acting like they couldn’t figure out things but that no one was as smart as him. They found the Armed Detective Agency specifically to use Ranpo’s abilities to help people and to have jobs.

He then saves Yosano from Mori, his ex something who after using her special ability to heal any injury as long as the person is about to die during the War, wanted to use it take control of their local mafia. Instead Fukuzawa and Ranpo rescue her and let her recover from her trauma and come into herself.

He then goes on to provide a place for Kunikida to fulfill his ideals, Dazai a place to do good after his own past in the mafia, Kenji a place to help people, Tanizaki and Naomi (siblings that don’t seem to have any guardians) work to support them, and Atsushi a place to work on his own trauma by protecting people. Fukuzawa later let’s Kyouka, another defection from the mafia, stay and work at the agency so she can help people and not have to kill them anymore. The entire Armed Detective Agency live in dorms that Fukuzawa provided. He also is very protective, putting everything on the line to help members of the Agency escape any danger he knows of. Like when Atsushi is kidnapped he bribes Ranpo to find him and sends Kunikida to rescue him. He sees any danger to the agency and its members as something for him to stop.”

Optimus Prime:

“#VOTE OPTIMUS HE'S THE DAD OF ALL TIME AND HAS ISSUES”

[dazais-guardian-angel]

alright I've thought about it for a while, and I'm fairly confident that is in fact Bram, and that Aya isn't hallucinating/seeing an illusion.

The biggest thing casting doubt, aside from the obvious different outfit, is the fact that the chapter ends on this reveal, suggesting it could be a cliffhanger bait. However, BSD's cliffhangers always involve something terrible happening that gets rectified in the next chapter(s), to scare us before giving us back hope; there's never been a case of the other way around, where something good happens to get our hopes up, only to have the rug pulled out from us at the start of next chapter to show that we were foolish for hoping. Asagiri is never that cruel. He loves his death baits and his dangerous situation baits before letting us know that everything is okay, and he'd never suggest that it was wrong for the audience or the characters to have hope, when BSD is quite literally about having hope even in the most absurd situations.

But more specifically, just.... what would a fakeout like this accomplish? The only way I could maybe see it was if this is Fyodor, and we think Aya is safe but she's actually not, but there's no way it's him, because we see him with the singularity and Kunikida/Tanizaki at the same time as this, he's wearing Bram's outfit and not the one this person has, and we've established that he wants to protect Aya, not hurt her. Granted, he obviously doesn't care enough about protecting her since he let her escape and get hurt all on her own lmao, so that's exactly why I ask what would be the point of him suddenly showing up just to save her from the rubble, only to then just hurt her anyway? None of that is logical.

And then, if it's Akutagawa, then that means we had our emotions played with for a twist that is just.... mildly disappointing but also not outright bad for the characters? Disappointing because Bram isn't back after all, but also not a net negative because Aya is still being rescued by someone we know and trust. If that were to happen, Aya hallucinating Aku as Bram, I just can't see it happening as a chapter cliffhanger fakeout at all; it would just feel cheap and cruel, playing with our feelings (not to mention Aya's feelings!) regarding a character we want to come back, for a reveal that isn't really worth it and doesn't change the status quo (because she's still safe regardless if it's Bram or Aku).

Aside from the lack of narrative justification, I also believe that if Aya were to hallucinate Bram, she would see him exactly as she knew him back when he regained his body — I mean, she basically does see him like that when she's remembering his last moments with her in this chapter and in the previous one when she's yelling at Fyodor; sure they're just repeated panels as flashbacks, but they're still her memories of how she sees him. I was unsure for a while about the figure's identity, but it was seeing it pointed out that Bram no longer has his nails that was really the final nail in the coffin haha get it, it's a multilayered joke, please laugh- for me: why would Aya hallucinate Bram not only not in his own outfit, but with his body altered from how she knows it? There'd be no reason why she would, and no way she could. She's never seen him in a different outfit, with different nails. Note that every other instance we've gotten of characters hallucinating significant figures in their lives (Atsushi, Mushitarou, Dazai), they're always wearing the clothes they're most known for and what the person knows them to wear. There's no reason to assume this would be different for Aya, and that she'd imagine him wearing a completely random outfit from the one she associates with him, and randomly without his signature long black nails.

This closeup panel of Bram's collar right when he first begins speaking pretty much proves my point. It's inconsistent with the new outfit (Aku's outfit) we see him wearing on the last page, but with the framing of this, with him being entirely in shadow in the rightmost panel when he first appears, it's clear to me that Aya can't see him clearly yet, so she's imagining him the way she remembers him. And then he gets closer/lifts the beam higher so that the shadow starts receding from him, and his feet and hands and different outfit become visible. The tone of this moment and the way it plays out is exactly as I've seen in numerous other visual media, where a character thinks they're on the brink of death and has lost all hope and is ready to accept it, before the slow, grand reveal of the person they thought they'd lost rescuing them, often with them posing a philosophical question to challenge their current despair or their belief that their loved one couldn't possibly still be alive, just as Bram does here. If you've seen enough movies and TV, you can probably imagine exactly the kind of scene I mean, and exactly how this moment would play out if it were animated I say "would" because it's never a given that Bones will adapt it with the right tone like I imagine.

This is framed as a triumphant, hopeful scene, of a knight coming to rescue his princess after he was thought to be dead. Aya has hurt her leg here, she's trapped, she's realizing she's about to die, and she's at last fully convinced herself that everything she so staunchly believed in was wrong and that everything she fought for all that time was for nothing; firstly, why would she suddenly hallucinate Bram if she had already lost all hope, but most importantly, why would the narrative have Bram defy death and return to her and challenge the idea that all her ideals and actions were meaningless, only for it to turn out that it isn't really him, when she misses him so bad? That just.... wouldn't be right at all, that's not the feeling this scene gives at all. This is their moment, Bram has to be the one to say these things to Aya with their history together, not anyone else, and I can't imagine Akutagawa saying something like what Bram says to her here, about royalty carrying out their pledge to protect someone without fail, even if he has inherited Bram's protectiveness towards Aya like Fyodor has. No, I'm 90% certain that is indeed Bram. It can't possibly be anyone else.

...And so, all that to say that yeah, I believe that Bram has Fyodor'd himself into Akutagawa's body, since he's wearing his outfit. We don't really know the extent of Bram's powers, but it's looking likely that he can bodysnatch any of his vampires for himself if something ever happens to him, or perhaps Aku might be special since he was the first vampire Bram created at the start of all this. Needless to say I'm not at all worried about Aku though; this is probably the beginning of why he ends up with that suit of armor later on, since Bram has his clothes... I just have no idea how we get to that point. But Aku will be fine, I'm sure; this may even be the only way he can come back from being a vampire.