#or maybe not cause its still going
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With all the new game trailers out recently is there anything that looked interesting to you ?
Yes, Top Three are:
Life is Strange: Double Exposure. Another LiS game with Max Caulfeild. I'm so excited. I also need to find time to catch up on the series.
Wanderstop wouldn't normally be my thing but it's made the developer of The Stanley Parable and the trailer left me wondering.
Starfield creation kit is big for me. I've been waiting for good mods to play more and shattered space dlc is just the cherry on top.
But also,
The lineup of upcoming games is impressive but I personally am not invested in Doom, Dragon Age, Black Ops, etc.
#love metal gear#i have perfect dark zero sitting on my shelf rn might replay#state of decay is the most underrated zombie game#or maybe not cause its still going#expiditon 33 isnt my usual thing i dont like turn based and didnt llah persona but it looks cool#might be forgetting something#it was a lot#asks#life is strange#double exposure#wanderstop#starfield#shattered space#creation kit#metal gear#state of decay#perfect dark#expedition 33
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ive been rewatching voltron....
#my art#goro akechi#persona 5#shuake#p5r#ren amamiya#persona 5 royal#akeshu#sumire yoshizawa#akira kurusu#yes maybe im considering finishing the love letters klance fic someday#i dont even know if anyone following me / active rn remembers that this used to be a klance blog#blink if you remember klance daily prompts#its so obvious if u ever go through the archive of this blog cause its all still there but it HAS been 4 years#not that im gonna return to klance but i really wana finish that fic i feel bad for having left it unfinished
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You know what.
ANOTHER DPxDC idea (as if I write prompts for anything else lol ✍(◔◡◔)
And once again, I think I might have a hyperfixation rn, another deaged Dani (Ellie) and Dan (Dante)! and Dad!Danny.
And you know what, lets make it another DannyxConner idea.
Danny is on a field trip with his class (NOT in Gotham though, LOVE Gotham but lets go with a different city) in like Central City or Metropolis (If Metropolis, Danny is SUPER excited to see the space sections they have at the museum they no doubt have, because well SUPERMAN is an alien and based in their city. If in Central City Conner is visiting Bart.)
During the trip he bumps into Conner and the two just hit it off. Conner enjoys listening to Danny rant about space and the stars and finds watching Danny's eyes light up in joy kinda cute. And if he got his new hero name Supernova from listening to Danny's rants about the stars well... no one needs to know how he got it.
Danny likes how chill Conner is and how the guy stood against Dash and the other jocks when Dash decided he wanted to mess with Danny during the trip, a rare thing nowadays but sometimes Dash does try, and how he respects/likes Danny's friends.
He didn't even say anything negative or hurtful when he found out Danny has two kids back home.
In the end the two exchange numbers, flirt hard, and maybe set up a date in the future. And then more dates. Becoming boyfriends. AND meeting the family. Conner is smitten with just out of toddlerhood Ellie and toddler Dante and adores them. And he loves how the Fentons just love him the moment he stepped into their house and was introduced as Danny's boyfriend, he made sure to bring over a pie Ma should him how to make.
Things get a bit complicated when Conner, Supernova, is at a reunion of YJ members and his phone lights up with a text message from Danny.
He's smiling with a goofy/soft look when he opens the text and see's its a picture of Danny holding a pouting toddler Dante and Ellie on his lap smiling with a notable gap in her teeth at the camera. The message he got was 'Ellie wanted you to know she finally lost her first baby tooth. Dan's been grumpier, I think he misses you.'
He is pulled out of his happy thoughts and musings when he hears Bart gasp hard and drop a bowl of snacks onto the floor. Conner turns to from the future Speedster and see's him about to have a panic attack.
Bart, Impulse, is having a freak out after catching a glimpse of the text picture Conner had gotten and being nosy wanted to know what got his friend to smile so smitten. He knew of Conner's current boyfriend and the kids Conner adores but haven't had time to be introduced to them or even see a pic.
He wasn't expecting to see the very MONSTER of his NIGHTMARES that basically destroyed the world in the FUTURE as a toddler pouting at a camera and surrounded by two smiling identical looking people either. People he never saw in the future or with HIM AND-
Oh.... OH!
Was that why he turned evil? Did something happen to his family?
#danny phantom#danny fenton#crossover#dp x dc#blue rambles#danny phantom dc#writing ideas#random idea#dpxdc#HUGE misunderstandings about to be done#Bart thinks the bad future is still on track#not knowing its already been fixed#the events have been avoided#BUT he does tell the others#it does send Conner in protect mode#and makes things a bit awkward between him and Bart btw#Bart is trying very very hard NOT to be scared/fearful of Dan since hes a toddler at the moment but its hard#TRAUMA for Bart sadly#Tim is coming up with many many plans to help protect this family that wormed their way in his best friends heart#Conner is panicking cause he doesn't wanna lose this wonderful family#Cassie is ready to throw down at anyone that even thinks about going after this family thats been making Conner so happy#Meanwhile the Fenton family are discussing when they should tell Conner the FULL Fenton family truths#aka Danny being Phantom/Halfa/Maybe Ghost King.#Dani/Ellie actually being his clone/mirror turned daughter due to destabilizing#and Dan/Dante technically being a evil timeline version of Danny/Vlad mixed into a clone body who destabilized as well and was now his son#over 9000 pairing
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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do you ever like wanna make something cool but you dont know how so you just sit around like a moron for 5 hours straight pretending you know how
me neither
on a more serious note i know ad astra as a whole isnt over but i still want to thank daybreaker for their fics. what friends are for was the very first md fic i ever stumbled upon when trying out ao3 for the first time, and prior to joining the server i was checking it near daily for uploads. god knows if i'd be as deep in ao3 as i am now if it werent for this story and convenient timing. Thanks for the story.
#so What Friends Are For is over.#i did nOT CRY. i DO NOT CRY.#the lyrics incorporating the lyrics into the final chapter. daybreaker i HATE YOU#i still get GOOSEBUMPS just THINKING about the lyrics and then you FORCE ME to READ THEM#i thought it would be cool for the lyrics to be from different characters so i just picked kinda at random maybe#would i consider this a long post#gonna say no cause its more grid. be happy i didnt spread them out like i usually do#just pretend all the frames are in a consistent style and also better in every way also#oh i could probably tag daybreaker here but i dont remember their tag#its probably @lady-daybreaker or something but im too deep in this to check now#im not that deep im just lazy#i made uzis beanie look good for ONE PANEL. a SINGLE PANEL#and it was the VERY FIRST ONE#this post sucks im going to sleep#art#murder drones#murder drones n#serial designation n#murder drones uzi#not tagging the lyrics or nori. figure them out yourself bozos#for that one guy who liked how i made the limbs bend in the last one. sorry i got lazy#is there a picture limit
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me Omw to annoy you about more Francesca content 😼😼
you and my entire inbox my friend strap in everyone this is gonna be The Francesca Mega Collection. part one The Bed Collection ft You HAVE To Click/Tap To Read Anything ESPECIALLY The Asks
thank you for joining me for the Francesca Bed Collection im going to pass out
#xmen#xmen comics#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#professor x#magneto#francesca the cat#snap sketches#OK HI HERE been tryin to posts this for ten asks now cause i severely underestimate the speed of my inbox once it picks up#ironically my sis dropped her cat off for the weekend so. i have much fran inspo LMAO she loves doing the bed thing i confess..#i will be candid and say right now that like. two(? maybe just one) of the asks in this post arent fran related#theyve been sitting in my inbox for weeks but they were used for inspo in this post SO IT COUNTS IM POSTING IT TO FEEL LESS GUILTY OK !!!!!#these arent meant to be a cohesive story or w/e but i mean if you try it can prob be. at least the last two#i was gonna try to knock out all my fran asks today actually but 1.) i underestimated how slow i draw#2.) i got to the thirdv (i made it first in this list but i mean he cutie in the third too..) comic and my brain decided i drew erik too ho#and ive decided to dedicate the rest of my night praying for forgiveness for my lascivious thinkings <- they will continue#but yeah like i said i have all the comics and the sort sketched out buuut i might redo one of them#its kinda nsft flavored (but still cute + sfw) and thats not usually a prob but the asks themselves are wholesome i felt awkward jerLJLK#maybe ill repurpose the beginning panels ... or hell maybe ill just finish them and post them as is#spoilers its more Superhero Roeplay bullshit so it can def be posted on its own without fran.. idk ...#we know how my brain goes Thats Why We're In This Sitch once im given an inch i run a marathon and i dont stop#i be having such intense visions im gonna throw up. anyway wtf was i saying i forget. oh well thaat means EnjoYWAIT I REMEMBER#im tempted to close my inbox for a bit just until i clear out all the asks i wanna draw and ik i dont HAVE to draw them#but as ive said i get visions so easily ...... and i must see them realized ... but then id miss talking to everyone :(#so we ball is simply the answer. ok fr enjoy now LMAO BYYYYEE im gonna go redraw some old stuff i think to wind down#maybe ill touch one more asks cause . cause like Many Of Them its got stuff ive been wantin to draw all week ... heh ...#ok bye we'll see what happens im not checking over these if theres a mistake then by god theres a mistake BYE
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On average, what is the total MONTHLY amount that you spend on dining out*?
*(This doesn't only count going out to restaurants, but also stuff like picking up fast food to bring home, getting a coffee on the way to work, getting a premade sandwich from a grocery store deli during lunch, buying a quick snack from a convenience store or food cart whilst walking somewhere, ordering a pizza or any other food to be delivered to your home, etc.)
*(If you often dine out in groups/as a household: calculate and divide the costs so that you get a Per Person average. This is for YOU individually, NOT the total household/group costs)
(I'm sure polls similar to this have been made before (very common topic), I just haven't personally seen one that I can remember, so, I was curious to do my own! I was discussing this with a group of people today and it was very interesting to see how widely the number varied between individuals. :0c )
(Reblog for bigger sample size if you can, and feel free to explain your answer in tags if there's anything extra to add!)
#polls#tumblr polls#I'm mostly in the 0/1 - 25$ category. Maybe the rare month is a bit over $25 if there's something specific going on like birthday.#Which I'm NEVER eating in an actual restaurant (erm... covid... plus I just hate restaurant environments. i would rather pickup#the food and bring it home to a peaceful quiet environment that I control lol). But more typically like stopping by a grocery store deli#section or something. I don't have coffee that much. And I can't eat fast food much due to my health issues/diet restriction stuff#so if I'm out like coming back from an appointment and I start feeling really sick and weak. I know that a hamburger will just#blow up my system and cause nausea or something. So I try to pick the breadiest most#neutral looking turkey sandwich at the safeway deli to eat during the hour ride home or whatever lol#I actually kind of wish I could do stuff like get food more often vecause it would take the burden of cooking everything off of me#but.. alas... Money... and Health Things... T o T#I still wouldn't do it ALL the time but like... once a week instead of once a month or something.. or maybe turning into a coffee#person.. I do love drinks A LOT .. i am a drink person who will have 5 different drinks sipping on at all times#But i just have to make them all myself mostly lol#And I cant really have too much coffee since it will make me sick. so like.. teas and juice mostly#When I inevitably become a millionaire by never using social media never networking and only finishing one#sculpture every 5 months which I dont even post about or sell - then I shall... get more drinks..#I will somehow wean my body onto coffee and drink one a day solely for the ritual of it#Though even then... I would still probably just like.. buy the mateirals to make it at home or something#Like if you had a million dollars you could just buy a kitchen grade ice cream machine and other stuff to make your own milkshakes and#coffees and smoothies and bubble teas. Genuinely I think even if I were a BILLIONAIRE I would still look at playing likr $8 for a single#coffee and go .. uh.... I could just buy the equipment to make this and then save that money. PLUS. its in my house now so no need to#have to leave. I can make my own drinks in the comfort of home. .. ideal..#Like no matter how rich I ever got I would still have the lingering scroogey stinginess. like i am NOT paying for that. I will jus#make it myself. Especially if it was an Everyday thing. Anythign thats part of my routine I try to optimize and make as efficient as#possible... ANYWAY.. In an IDEAL world I would get treats. but probably not that much. as on a daily basis it would start to get#to me and I would just save up to buy kitchen machinery if I was rich lol
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It's my right to tell myself I can do just a little animation just for fun just for really quick to do some action and then spend 3 days straight on it
#animation#we were legion#2d animation#sketch animation#sketch#zagan#I jut really like drawing action okay...#Time and time again is too nice of a comic ykwim its like all about grief and forgiveness and self love#so the whole point is that there's other ways and we will always try for something better#and we will grow together#BUT NOT THIS COMIC!!!<t#this comic is about a demon who is a complete asshole and resorts to violence over literally everything!#he like gets better#but there's still action the whole time...#cause its not about anything serious its about like hey maybe theres OTHER things you can do that are cool#and that violence immediately isn't the best way to go...#but like sometimes violence is allowed#and so even in the end once he's better as a person#there can still be fights#YAYYYYYY#I love action AHHAHAHAHA#its so much fun to draw#ughhh#such a fuckin wonderful way to explore my love of anatomy and dynamic poses#like YES yes yes yes yes yes yes#let me draw a guy at like 100 different angles and they all have to match up believably#PLEASE GOD ITS SOO GOOD I LOVE IT#also I keep watching the animation. I like how it came out a lot...#ok bye.
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I WANT ENDLESS BLISS!!!
HALF-AWAKE, HALF-DEAD, HALF-LIFE CRISIS
ALL NATURAL POMEGRANATE PULP.
FERMENTED TO PERFECTION, SAVOUR YOUR SAVIOR.
Q: What's your favourite food? A: THE ALE THEY SERVE AT THE TAVERN!
other versions : )
#uhhhh happy pride month have a fucked up chilchuck that im really proud of#i took so long on that hair rendering just so i could cover it up with the stars...#this was a reaaaally experimental one#if i had another go at this id change a lot of things but sometimes you gotta know when to stop#ive learned my lesson from this one so ill do another one with my knowledge now ykyk#ive discovered i reaaaallly reaaaaaally like thin lines#still figuring out how rendering + painting works but hey it was a nice attempt!!#this is my first finished peice in a looongggg loooooongggg time and it makes me really happy how well it came out#i guess switching things up really helped with things.. i usually get stuck at flat colors because i get so bored#cw alcohol#cw alcoholism#eyestrain#<- maybe? its really saturated#chilchuck#chilchuck tims#dungeon meshi#by the way i always thought him saying “ale” as an answer to “favourite food” was odd#maybe its a translation thing where theres a japanese wprd that covers both food and drink and the translator just estimated it to “food”?#cause if its not... sir??? chilchuck thats not a food... my man... you have a problem...#this is#[ tragedy au ]#but honestly you could take it as set in canon#by the way do you like my little poem : ) im pspspsps-ing at the dungeon meshi fandom/fandom in general to write more poetry/short lit#maybe ill tweek it and post the poem on ao3.... shrug !
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back on the topic of eddie brock never being the first choice. crazy to me to think about the origin of the venom symbol which is that the symbiote Was With Spiderman First. the venom symbol is a slightly creepier version of the spiderman symbol with an extra bend in the legs cause it's the symbiote's best approximation of what it thought spiderman wanted. and when spiderman rejects the symbiote and venom shows up it's still the same suit just on a different person. the symbiote learned emotions from peter parker and it is angry and hurt at not being wanted but it stays in the form it thought he wanted... peter parker disarms eddie brock once by telling the symbiote that he wants it back and attacking once the symbiote starts to leave... eddie has such a hard time throughout the comics with the fact that the symbiote Will Leave Him if prompted by the right person. and be so honest. what would you do if you were eddie brock and no matter where you went or what you did there was a symbol that you were somebody else's second choice emblazoned across your chest
#drives me crazy actually#this thing completes you it is everything to you...#the most important thing!!! the thing that makes you whole!!!!!!#and sure it may love you but you were only ever a convenience. never the person it would Choose.#thank you venom: first host for being a beautiful world where the symbiote says it will NOT go back with a previous host#cause it chose eddie. cause he's a good man. cause it's trying to raise its fucking kid with him kdfgjhsd.#EVERYWHERE else...#the symbiote is still in love with peter parker. he calls it back and back it goes.#flash thompson calls out and the symbiote desperately reaches toward him calling out his name. trying to go back.#and again and again where is eddie brock... secondary...#not even the first decision to begin with. maybe it was fate that you were in the right place at the right time#but maybe you were just in that church. about to kill yourself. and you Happened to hate the right person.#you and the symbiote complete each other and you have similar goals but even then it was all about peter parker anyway...#insane. insane. insane.#anyway. hhhhhhhhhh#venomposting#venom#i am a symbrock truther i think the symbiote WOULD choose him. but the comic writers hate me and hate love
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gen loss dump part 2 :]
i have a gen loss playlist so the last two was me hitting randomize and drawing a pic based on the song before it finished. the second one technically isn’t that cause charlie’s inferno isn’t on apple music cause they hate me so it’s way more of the song out of spite because they wouldn’t give it to me.
#spotify is prolly better (definitely is for finding playlists i use spotify to find playlists still and then add those songs to my own lmao#but dad pays for a family apple music subscription and free music streaming is infinitely better then paying for my own spotify#also my wound reference i feel like i let him off easy from the seven foot tall wire security monster#but idk this was drawn a year ago idk what i was doing#like i agree w the vest just being REALLLL bad bruising and internal stuff but i feel like he had wayyyy more open area besides that to get#fucked up besides just his arms#but i guess since the wire monster also got turned off by the button since it didn’t immediately go at ranboo next then maybe that’s still#reasonable idk#generation loss#generation loss fanart#ranboo fanart#continuing my not spamming tags trend so even though i bc puls have tagged all three of them im not gonna#still posting this primarily for me and for everyone else second#OH THE OUTFITS ARE FROM MY PIN BOARDS#I MAKE OUTFIT BOARDS FOR EVERYTHING ITS SO FUN#LIKE EVERY FANDOM IVE POSTED HERE HAS ONE#ITS BAD#and then irl i wear sweats and t shirt lmao#i found mouse trap game board earrings#i spend too much time on those finding highly specific bullshit#the jrwi one is especially cringe cause i have a different section for all of the what ifs#and that shit lasted one (1) episode#also the full color drawing i’m so >:| about it#i need to practice coloring sooooo badly but i always get frustrated w it#i need to slow tf down idk#but thats also from nearly a year ago so
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I draw a sketch to simply offer my own personal little headcanon and theory that Zenos was the only other descendant Emet got close to (knowing him probably unintentionally) besides Lucius.
Obviously we never see them interact directly, but several little worldbuilding tidbits do make me ponder about certain things, like the possibility lorewise that it could've been Emet that named Zenos, and the fact that they share certain habits and potentially interests.
#ffxiv#concept#fan art#sketch#zenos yae galvus#solus zos galvus#emet selch#ffxiv spoilers#potentially I suppose#just wanted to draw something sweet#and maybe it was also an excuse to draw little baby faced Zenos before I work on some other comic ideas#obviously I still don't think Zenos got a lot of warmth from Emet especially as he got older or think that he really raised him directly-#however#the theatrics- their tendancies to nap when theyre bored- and the fact that Zenos is a garlean who's name is greek rooted not roman#those little parallels just makes my writing brain go brr#though I will admit a part of this characterization was also inspired by the april fools manga#and its cute that even not directly involved- and often causing him more trouble than anything- that Emet was looking out for Zenos there#like its not canon#but I hope that was meant to still be fully in character- I adore the little bits of interaction and characterizations we got#it is also interesting to me that his name (iirc) is supposed to mean 'gift of zeus'- and he turned out to be quite literally gifted
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'I wont cry for you, I wont crucify the things you do. I wont cry for you, see, when you're gone, I'll still be BLOODY MARY'
#cw blood#SUUUPER SCUFFED LIL WIP THATS BEEN RRRROTTING IN MY FOLDER. OUT!! GET OUT!!!#its almos 2 am and imm gettin high as hrothgar. spruced this up within an hour so i could be shared n eaten#its SUPPOsed to be part ofa bigger doodly page so ofc theres the chance this changes between now n then#fuuuuck shoulda made her dress sparkly. fuckit ill fix it laterrrrr. i havnt posted art in YWEARRS i needed to post something#also i uh. well you see i started losing followers on twitter bc im sooo inactive and i KNOW that shouldnt matter like it should be whateve#but. you see. i lkike when number go up and when it go down i get MMMADDD.we all get our dopamine from somewhere#ANYWAY so i actually havnt touched the suckening in so long. been workin on oc stuff.BUT WELL. ARTHUR AND MARY. STILL MAKE ME WEEP#THEYRE SO CUTE N TRAGIC...whadda fuck is it with grizzly n charlie characters being so in love and so doomed#kian and becky then arthur and his various exes like CMAHn.stop doing this to me#from what i remember of the episode.she seemed so.tired.disconnected.like she had been wandering a dream#and yet she seemed so positive.reasonably concerned and yet.content.she warmed up to arthur as soon as she recognized him#she speaks so gently and so sweetly and she keeps the conversation so light.even though shes dead and shes gone and she#is doomed to wander an odd limbo for the rest of time.and yet she seemed so at peace.i can see why arthur liked her.what happened?#what caused them to separate?arthur seems so jaded and so tired.marys company seems like such a gentle place to rest.#how did he squander such a blessing?was it a blessing?OHH what i would give to crack open their minds and peer inside.#yknow wat im runnign out of room i think so ill add a last thought here at the bottom of my tags. I AM MORE CORRECT ABT ARHTURS UGLY LOOK#I WANT THAT MAN TO BE BEASTLY AND GROSS AND STRANGE AND SCARY AND EEWWW I SEE THINGS SQUIRMING IN THE DARK.ther are bugs#LETTING HIM HAVE HOT HOT ABBS AND STUFF WAS A COP OUUTTTT LET HIS WHOLE FORM BE DISTORTED OR UR NOT A FUCKING 0 APPEARANCE BITCH#THE BONES SHIFTED BENEATH AS IF TRYING TO HATCH. MANY OTHER THINGS HATCHED ASWELL. THE DEAD IMMORTAL FLESH SOURED#TOO GRAND TO ROT BUT TOO CORRUPTED TO KEEP CLASSIC FORM. MMMONSTER MONSTER MONSTER MONSTER#oka y im not going to bed but im gonna go. uh. do miore drugs or something. maybe ill work on more jrwi stuff. or oc stuff.#i hope ur day goes swimmingly thankyou for reading my tags i love you so so so so so much
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thinking about kurapika and chrollo and parallels and this circle of horrors where they are the victims AND the tools of their fates.
they both think they are neither or more like they don't care about it at all. they don't see themselves as victims, and they see absolutely no other way to live other than this role they took upon themselves. kurapika had such a strong sense of identity and what he wanted to do with his life and understands himself perfectly at all times. he was a part of his clan, but he was more an individual than anything else. kuroro, on the other hand, never knowing, never thinking what his motives are, deliberately not understanding himself and desperately holding on to the spider. he can't be an individual but with others, he can be the spider.
and for both of them, it all started on vengeance. kurapika abandoned himself in order to become a tool, a weapon, to avenge his clan, and to collect scarlet eyes. he stopped being himself and became his people. kuroro didn't know his family, didn't know where he actually came from, didn't know who he was or what he was supposed to be. so growing up in meteor city, he held on to his people strongly. and in order to avenge and protect his people, he would become a tool, a weapon, he would give himself to them. he started being himself as he became his people.
kuroro could be something for his people. and kurapika could be nothing for his people.
kurapika took on the role of judgement for vengeance. kuroro took on the role of villain for vengeance. kurapika acted his part by diminishing everything he was, and kuroro acted his part by filling up his identity with it.
but one thing stays clear and fixed with them throughout it all. they would do anything for their people. for whomever they consider their people. "he'll put his friends before his mission." a weakness kuroro sees in kurapika so quickly and so easily. but the same thing he considers a strength in himself. "i am not your top priority. it is the spider that must be kept alive." as long as his people are alive, his identity will live on. and as long as kurapika is alive, his people’s identity will live on.
"now you will get to experience the pain of losing your home." kuroro (and the spiders) killing the kurta clan set this parallel in motion for himself as the circle began for kurapika. and (speculatively) kurta clan hurting his people was what set the circle in motion for kuroro, too. now thinking about where they are in the story and how their end could be, it is very clear that they are finally ending up in a place where they mirror each other (as they have from the beginning) and they can recognise it in each other and themselves. kurapika ending up empty after his mission and kuroro ending up empty after losing spiders. both of them purposeless and with no self left outside of it. in a way, this is how the circle ends. "i can hear that he accepted death." they walk with death every day with no fear and full acceptance and after losing the only thing they live for, not even something they hold on to because they don't see a point in being alive outside of the fact that they must keep going for their people, for their purpose, and if not then there's no reason to exist, they are meaningless.
kuroro's vengeance left kurapika all alone, with everyone he knew dead, and feeling hollow at the end. by fate, he ended up all alone, with everyone he knew dead and feeling hollow at the end.
and at that point, they will have to start a new page and build a new self for themselves.
#hunter x hunter#kurokura#kurapika#chrollo lucilfer#hxh#&#when the narrative of characters are so sweetly fucked up and so intertwined that they dont even have to interact for me to go insane#also there are two wolves inside me. one wants them to never leave this fucked up circle and going around feeling lost#and having nasty sex about it bc they are obsessed with each other.#for kurapika its like. 'you're the one caused all of this i will always hate you. but you are the only one who will ever#understand and know me completely like this. i want you to take everything. i want you to give me anything.'#and for kuroro its like. 'i want you to give me purpose. i want you to hate me. i want you to love me. i want to give you everything.#i'll kill for you if you want. i'll die for you if you want. i'll die by your hands if you want. give me anything. give me everything.'#yeah. so#i have a very specific vision for them like the pepe silvia meme. you see my vision or you dont#and the other wolf is just them being kinda mentally stable and living for themselves and building a healthyish relationship#like they come to an understanding and go their own ways but then they keep ending up in the same business and maybe have to work together#and a very slow burn of having to be civil with each other to lovers. or something boring like that#but the sex is still nasty btw#i mean if not. whats all that catholic imagery for
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Why do you think did Anya ask Jimmy to give Curly the meds when she knew what kind of person Jimmy was?
I subscribe to the idea it was because she couldn’t bring herself to force the pills on Curly the same way Jimmy forced himself on to her. That and a mix of it inducing nausea due to the pregnancy. Since she took care of him outside of that one task, I think it was more the sound of him struggling and resisting than disgust with him.
On a personal level, it’s Curly. She still likes Curly and seeing the one person that was just starting to hear her be reduced to such a suffering, vulnerable state. It hurts and it’s frustrating and it’s unfair and despite the med bay being her area, she doesn’t like hearing the pain inside it. She asks Jimmy in my mind because Daisuke is a bit too young, to eager in her mind to help, he could easily and accidentally make it more painful for Curly. Swansea is just to gruff but Jimmy?
Jimmy was Curly’s friend, best friend, closest friend. He knew him and vice versa. Of all of them he should be the most willing and best option to get rid of his pain. I mean, I don’t think it was with malicious intent. She knew how cruel Jimmy could be but Curly said it himself.
“He won’t try any shit with me.”
She clings on to that a bit, despite knowing it’s meaningless now. I think it makes a nice parallel to how Curly’s attempts to help just fell flat or made things a bit worse. She wants him to stop hurting but this way just brings a whole new type of pain. It’s so much more obvious the way Jimmy treats people with Anya cause he has no false pretenses with her. He makes her feel guilty for asking to do one thing similarly to how he guilt trips and twists words with Curly.
#like I don’t think Anya is purposely asking Jimmy so Curly can understand what she was going through#but she’s a nurse she sees the bruises and the way Curly has to look after Jimmy takes care of him#she was also his victim she can see in Curly’s eye the way he stares at Jimmy when he enters the room the way he squirms and whimpers when#she leaves it but she can’t see what happens she doesn’t know what he’s doing and its a sort of ignorance they share#Curly doesn’t blame her but it still hurts and the feeling is mutual and it’s tragic#like people make the characters a bit too purposely mean or malicious when a lot of the things they do are bad responses#to what they are trapped in like do people really think Anya is intentionally sicking her abuser on someone else let alone so vulnerable?#maybe she realizes what could happen but she takes a risk everytime she asks cause Jim gets mad and aggressive with her#maybe in the back of her mind it’s a distraction from her on to him and maybe a part of her she hates likes that it’s no longer her#but it’s never intentional not something she wants or feels a need to happen#mouthwashing#ask#anon#nurse anya#captain curly#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing#mouthwashing game
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my honest reaction
#once again the trailer just kind of makes me feel nothing but confusion at why theyre doing things the way they are#why is gerald still alive. even if it turns out to be time travel or him being frozen alongside shadow or something#it still takes away a lot of the emotional impact of shadows story ... why .....#the fact that theyre just seemingly having gerald be rouge's replacement in the dark story trio too???? what. thats stupid .#and speaking of rouge. where are rouge and amy. ive never seen a single good argument to justify their exclusion here#why is the only girl character from the games whos present the one who famously dies horribly for male characters' motivation#(to be clear im not saying the way maria's death is handled in the games is bad writing or anything#just that having her be the only girl character to have a movie counterpart is certainly A Choice.)#and. why are team sonic (and human characters associated with them who are supposed to be the good guys) working with gun .#gun literally does nothing but cause problems for sonic in sa2 ?!?!?!??!?!#even if it does turn out theyre not being completely honest with sonic about what shadow's whole deal is thats still. why ...#i wasnt expecting an exact recreation of sa2 but that doenst mean i have to be okay with every possible change they make either#especially when a lot of this stuff just actively makes the story worse. sa2 im so sorry they did this to you#honestly probably wouldnt bother me quite as much if this was a comic or tv show or something#and not . a big popular movie that is probably going to overshadow the game in a lot of peoples minds. ughhhh#also shadow has still only had a couple lines so maybe its not fair for me to say anything just yet#but i dont . really like how he sounds from what we've heard .. why did the ycast keanu reeves this sucks#idris elba as knuckles is starting to annoy me too tbh . like i didnt care for it at first but then it grew on me#and now im back to not really liking it . that is NOT knuckles#anyway. im honestly struggling to understand how so many fans of the games are uncritically excited about the movie ?#and dont have any problem with the writing choices being made here.. ?#do they just not care how shadow's story is portrayed as long as he looks cool doing it .. ?#im not saiyng the people who are excited are fake fans i just . dont get it
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