#or maybe diaries written by the participants?

[cult-of-the-eye]

I know the unethical psychological experiment/psychological experiment gone wrong has sort of been done to death but it would be so insanely cool to see how it would be handled in the tmagp universe as an incident

[lorsdelapluie]

The doctor's diary.

Pairing: sylus x female reader

Genre: Dark shit going on. Including smut. Please read the content warning.

Word count: 4000+ words.

Content warning: mdni, explicit sexual content (but its chill for now), spoiler warning, mention of human experimentation, cult activities, my own twisted thoughts and theories are literally making this way darker than LADS already is. An oc of mine will appear more often in the next chapters, hate him guys, he is not a good guy. English is not my first language sorry for any mistakes.

Note: This chapter ended up longer than I expected somehow. And it is the first one of a three chapter fanfiction. I tend to write nasty stuff, sex wise but also everything else wise so please be prepared for anything literally. The character Castiel that you will meet in this chapter is my own oc that I made up specially for the LADS universe. I hope you will enjoy to hate him.

Chapter 1:

“You want me to go in the N109 zone ? I thought we weren’t allowed to go th-” 

“We are aware you have been going back and forth between Linkon city and the N109 Zone.” 

You pinched your lips at the words coming from Jenna’s mouth, your hand resting on your hunter’s watch. The times you forgot to turn off your watch comes back to light one by one in your mind. Brushing it off everytime you thought that the HQ wouldn't have the time to check on your status. Her arms were still crossed over her chest as she looked at you straight in the face with her dark gray eyes. You felt like a kid underneath this disappointed glare. You opened your lips to say something, to defend yourself but she raised her hand to stop you from doing so. 

“However, you have mainly been doing this outside your working hours. So it is your private life, and you may keep it a secret if you wish. But since you have been going there multiple times, we figured you might be aware of what is going on there better than we do.” She sighed. You guessed that she wasn't the one behind this idea. Maybe some higher ups that you never had the opportunity to meet.

“So this is why we thought you might be the best suited agent for this mission.”

“Oh uhm… Thank you for entrusting me.” 

“Despite this little disagreement, I am aware that you are one of our best agents. However if you think you might need help, you can still ask Xavier to accompany you. Although he has been quite busy lately.”

“No no no ! Do not bother Xavier for this. I am more than capable of handling missions on my own. As for the mission… Can I ask you what is it that I am meant to do ?” 

“Of course. I wouldn’t let you go into the Lions’ den without information.” She said as she slid her hand on her desk, taking a handful of documents stored inside a pocket and handing them to you. “We need you to participate in an auction for charity.”

“For charity…” you mumbled. You never thought you would see the day of a charity auction being held in the a zone so… uncharitable. You start looking through the papers in your hand, brows furrowed in confusion.

“We are as surprised as you look. As nice as the thoughts around this event are, we are particularly interested in one of the prizes that we wish you would purchase for us.”

Your eyes land on the auction picture of a diary, its cover is made of leather and the pages look old, teared up for some of them. “A diary ?”

“This diary seemingly belonged to one of the most wanted people of our organization. A doctor who previously worked here, in Linkon city, and got too deep in his interest for protocores and their links with people’s evol.” 

“He experimented on humans…” you mumbled as you read the notes next to the picture that the intel team had written for you. "On children..."

“He indeed did. And we would like to prevent this diary from falling into the wrong hands. This is where your part comes in. Buying this diary away from that zone.”

You nodded as you guessed the objective of your mission long before she started explaining the reason why they would go fetch that book in the first place. Plus, that diary might bring you answers you are seeking about yourself. And as you remember your partner's jewel like gaze, about Sylus too. You then raised yours towards Jenna, closing the file between your hands and straightening your back. 

“If you will allow me. I’m going to do the best I can to fulfill this mission.” 

“I know you will. The auction is in three days. I hope it gives you enough time to gather any belongings and travel to a safe place in the N109 zone… If such a place exists.” 

“Do not worry about me. I will be safe.”

You smile as Jenna raises her hand slowly with a peaceful expression as she dismisses you from her office. You exit the room, slowly closing the door behind you before walking to your desk, gathering your laptop and phone on the furniture. You then put the file inside your bag as you were already leaving the building. You would take the time to analyze everything once you were safely in the N109 Zone.

Phone in hand you immediately texted Xavier to let him know that you were leaving for a mission in the outskirts of your beloved city. As your thumbs were patting the screen of your phone, it suddenly started to vibrate. Soon enough the icon of Sylus appeared on your phone, a silly picture of him you took when he dozed off while watching a musical a few weeks prior. You frowned at the VERY convenient timing that he always had and picked up, raising your phone to your ear. 

“Yes ?”

“The twins are going to pick you up at 5 this afternoon. Will you have enough time to be prepared before then?” 

“Don’t tell me you hacked Jenna’s computer again. How many times do I have to tell you to not do that?” You frowned, faking or maybe wanting to be angry about that breach of your private life once again.

“There is no need to get angry at me. Be angry at the twins all you want though. They are the ones who insisted on checking up on you while I was away.” 

“How do they even know how to hack-” you stopped in your tracks as you heard your voice the sound of a bike motor in the background of the call. “Are you calling me while driving ?”

“Now this is a reason you can get mad at me for.” he chuckles as you let out a frustrated sound. “Do not worry, sweetie, I have my helmet on. Just checking on you through earbuds.” 

“Unsafe still. Your attention should be fully on the road.” you finally started walking towards the road that leads to your apartment, going through the usual route that takes you near along a river. “I thought you said you would be the one picking me up after Luke nearly got us in a car crash last time.” 

“I’m sorry to disappoint you, sweetie. But I do have some work meetings that need to be attended to." After a moment of quiet, he continued. “I trust Kieran will be the one driving you three back at home. I will be back before dinner.” 

“Fine. Be careful on your way to your meet up… I will see you later.” you could hear a chuckle, and the picture of Sylus’ grin appeared in your mind. Before he could answer, you hung up. 

You sighed as you crossed the street, pushing the door of your building entrance after entering the password on the door’s pad. Slowly you slid the phone inside your bag, totally forgetting about warning your colleague, and your friends, of the mission that will probably won’t let you have time for chit chat. Once you are inside your place, you quickly pull out a bag from the closet in the entrance, walking towards your bedroom to pack your essentials for the next few days. 

An hour flew by without you realizing it before your phone rang. Luke. As you picked up you hear his cheerful voice coming from outside your building, you walked towards your opened window staring down. 

“Miss ! Your carriage is waiting for you !” the masked man yells waving at you from below, catching glances from other people passing by. 

“Get inside the car ! Can’t you see people are staring at you Luke ?” you frowned shooing him away with your hand. 

“Heeeh. I’m hurt ! Are you embarrassed by me perhaps ?” You wondered if Sylus teasing was coming from spending too much time with them or the other way round. 

You frowned not wanting to let your mind wander at that thought, hanging up and closing the window before picking your bag on your bed and leaving your apartment. Once downstairs you were greeted with no one but the black car with tinted windows that was just in front of the house, without giving it much thoughts you walked to the back of the car and climbed inside. 

After exchanging proper greetings with the twins, and a short trip from Linkon city to the twins’ boss base. 

It was night time now and you were settled down in one of Sylus couch in his apartments. You were going through the file once more, eyeing the clock in front of you from time to time. The meal was soon to be put down in the living room and you were definitely imagining eating alone at this rate. You sighed as you let your head roll on one of the sides of the couch, closing your eyes as you let yourself drift to the sound of the gramophone playing the music you put on earlier. 

“Are you asleep ?” a whisper came above the sound of the music as a finger brushed against your cheek. 

Your eyes opened and you looked up to the figure towering over you. Sylus gazed at you as he was leaning with one hand on the couch watching you slowly wake up from your nap. You slowly straight up, your files sliding from your chest and before you could react, Sylus caught it and put it down on the table next to you.

“Mmm no.” 

“Sure you weren’t.” he smiled as he sat on the carpet next to the couch. “Don’t move.” 

“But the dinner…” you mumbled still drowsy. 

“Dinner is cold by now. I was late and you fell asleep. We are in no hurry anymore.” he says as he takes off his jacket, putting it down on the chair behind him, soon followed by his gloves. You sighed knowing that the man next you wouldn't budge. 

“How did your meeting go ?” you asked as you traced every of his movements with your gaze. 

“Productive. But a waste of time at the same time. We wasted 2 hours waiting for someone who never came. I honestly thought I was going to come back really early.” 

“Would have been better…” you muttered.

Sylus' head turned to look at you with that same grin of his when he catches you being off guard. “Missing me I see.” 

“Whatever.” 

“I missed you too, sweetie.” he muttered as his face was now a few inches away from your face. And as always Sylus was the one to close that distance, his teeth started nibbling gently on your lower lip as he kissed you. His right hand comes to brush a strand of hair away from your face. "I missed you a lot."

There was always this conflict inside of you when you felt the lips of Sylus on yours. A shyness that you wished you didn’t have, pushing you to turn your face away. However the drumming of your heart everytime his lips were on yours made you feel safe. Safe and cared for. The man suddenly started pushing his tongue against your lips, deepening the kiss drawing a sound from you in a sigh. 

“Knowing that you were waiting for me here. Probably lying down on that bed or on that couch…” he muttered as he kissed your lips once again then your cheek and the back of your ear. “I wished I could have just left to join you here quicker.”

“You are… so dirty Sylus.” you whispered as you felt his hand slide on your shirt to start unbuttoning it. When Sylus admitted his excitement for you it always made you shiver. Not that it was rare for him to be so blunt. But being wanted and knowing that he was thinking of you that way, in places where he shouldn’t. God, he was the devil in person and he loved playing with his favorite person. 

“If you want to blame me for the tension rising in this room. Feel free to do so…” he said, lips leaving a trailing of kisses from your neck towards your chest. “I would enjoy that.” 

Soon his lips were not the only thing on your skin, his tongue traveled against you with wet kisses. Teeth sometimes nibble on you, trying to mark you as his. However he knew better than to do that or he would have been met with a warning look. Instead his hand slides away the remaining of your top clothes, revealing your skin to his red eyes ravishing each corner of your body, everytime. 

“Your skin is covered in goosebumps. Are you getting worked up sweetie ?” he says smiling, his lips resting against your chest. A thumb sliding against one of your nipples. “I bet that if I slide my hand in your pants, I might find it dripping with excitement.” 

“You are too sure of yourself.” you said trying to keep your voice steady as his lips brushed against your other nipple. 

A low chuckle vibrates through his body at your answer. “Always so feisty, kitten.” he murmured, pinching with two of his fingers the nipple he had in his hand. 

“Then… Shall we take a look ?” 

As soon as the words left his mouth, you closed your legs, preventing his hand from sliding under your pants and between your thighs. His hand stopped mid-way, resting against your lower body. He slowly quirked up his face, arching a brow with a smile. 

“Getting shy ?” he asks, fingers fondling with the zipper of your pants. He soon pulled it down. “You know I don’t particularly enjoy you playing shy. I’d rather have my feisty kitten biting and fighting me than hiding away.” 

Asshole you thought. 

“Should I take out the ropes like last time ? Pull your legs apart ? I thought you learnt how to behave.” he said with a smile. “Or did you enjoy this so much that you want to try again ?” 

Losing control from time to time was nice. But not tonight, you needed the contrary. You need to feel in control of your body. The next few days were gonna be stressful. One of your hands dared to come rest on his cheek as your legs opened against his hand. 

“Good girl..” he said, his lips coming to nuzzle against your hand. And as usual when a kiss comes first teeth soon follow. His fingers able to slide under your pants and underwear come to slide in between your folds feeling the wetness of yourself under his burning gaze. 

“Just as I thought.” he smiles as one of his fingers pushes inside you and you answer with a moan. His lips nibbling on the flesh of your palm, eyelashes brushing against your fingers as he starts going back and forth with his fingers inside of you. 

Your head resting against the pillow of the couch, eyes closing as another moan came from between your lips as he pushed another finger inside of you. The fingers of your hand slowly extended to grasp onto strands of the man’s hair, while the other came gripping on the back of the couch. 

“That’s it. Let yourself go, kitten.” A growl soon followed when you tug at his hair when his thumb rested against your clit making small circles as he never stopped pumping his fingers in and out of you. 

You arched your back, the stimulation of his fingers rubbing against that one G spot inside of you and his thumb massaging your clit made you see stars. You tug on his hair once again in another sound, coming under his watchful gaze. 

“Sylus…” 

“It’s okay. I’m here. I’m always here.” he answered, coming to put a kiss on your forehead. 

Once he pulls his fingers out of you, he slides a hand under you to carry you against him. You look up at him, arms sliding around his neck to secure yourself. 

“And you ?” 

“Oh ? Are you asking for more, sweetie ?”” he chuckles as you frown at him. His lips slowly come against your own to kiss you once more. “This is what I wanted. Nothing more for tonight. But I can not promise you anything just like this for tomorrow.” A devilish smile spreads on his lips. 

“Did you have a shower already ?” 

“I did… Earlier.” you answered as you rested your head against his shoulder. “What about food ?” 

“You are hungry aren’t you.” He said as he settled you down on the bed. “Tell you what. I will come bring you some food and you can enjoy some while I take a shower. Sounds good ?” 

“Sounds good. I will try to not eat everything.” You smile. 

And just like that three days passed. Now you were standing in front of the door, arms crossed on your chest and Sylus blocking your way with his hands on his hips. 

“I will not change my mind Sylus. I need to attend this auction alone.”

“What if I’d like to be charitable tonight?”

You scoff. “Please. You just want to keep your eyes on me.”

“I want to make sure you are safe and sound.” 

“And I told you I can defend myself. If the HQ knows that I am attending an official mission with the boss of Onychinus, I could get in trouble. Because they will keep an eye on me ! Just like you do.” 

Sylus sighs. You could be so stubborn. He slowly raised his hand to pinch his nose’s bridge. “Take Mephisto with you at least. He could help you in any case of an emergency.” 

“That noisy little…” you were met by a glare that was telling you to not push your luck so you resigned. “Okay.”

“Good.” As soon as you agreed to his terms, he snapped his fingers and Mephisto almost appeared on your shoulder. Resting his claws against the fabric of your dress. “I will drive you there. And I will be there again to pick you up soon after Mephisto lets me know the auction has ended. Understood ?” 

“Yes mom.”

He chuckles before pushing the door open, letting you leave the safe base first to get to the car parked in front of the entrance. He soon followed and got inside the car to start driving across the dark streets of the N109 Zone. Mephisto was awfully quiet, head turning around at each corner, as if the bird was already on a mission analyzing what was around him. You stared mindlessly at the street lamps barely shining some cold light on the pavement beneath them as you fondle with your bag between your fingers. 

You were stressed. Stressed to not be able to bring back that diary. What if you came back in Linkon city with nothing to offer but the news that another potential monster had this fucking diary between their hands. How many children would have to suffer from experiments and be kept in the dark before they all stopped ? Without realizing it, you started clenching on your accessory. And the hand of Sylus left the gearbox to come rest on your thigh in an attempt to soothe you. 

“Do not be anxious. People coming to those kinds of fake charity auctions hunt down people like you. Nice face, seemingly weak and rich.” he said. “Mephisto is a sign that you are under my watch but he can’t dissuade them from doing anything if they are crazy enough to try.” 

“So I need to appear confident…” 

“Exactly. I know you can do it. After all, you showed me your acting skills more than once.” he pressed his thumb against your thigh as he kept looking at the road in front of you. “I’m not here physically but Mephisto is my eyes. And I’ll keep an eye on you.”

“I know.” you sighed before taking another deep breath. It will be okay, you thought, Sylus is right. You had to have faith in yourself and in him. It will go by so quickly, you won’t even realize it. 

The car slows down and you are now parked in front of an immense building, maybe even taller than some of Sylus’s ones. You look up from your seat as Mephisto mimics you. “Where are we ?”

“The place of the auction. The HQ of the Eurydike cult. Weird bunch of fuckers.” 

You hummed before pushing the door open, before closing it you looked at your partner flashing him a smile. “I will be back.” He softly smiles back waving, asking you to be careful once more. And you closed the door, walking towards the entrance of the building, taking out the invitation out of your bag to show the bodyguards that you were allowed to enter the place. 

As soon as you stepped foot inside, you were faced with a display of wealthiness and laughter coming from every corner of the giant hall. You were taken aback, thinking for a second that the only man you thought was this wealthy in the N109 Zone was Sylus. The hall was made of black marble with golden cracks, contrasted by high white walls that reflected the light of the candlesticks. Hanging banners here and there with an unknown insignia, and false plants hanging in green. You looked around, looking for a sign indicating the location of the meeting. But unfortunately the place was badly indicated, this auction was probably a place of regulars. However you spotted some people whispering about getting their place already to get closer to the stage, and you figured it would be the best idea to follow them around. Which you did. Everyone here was accompanied, and you were alone. Well accompanied but by a bird that started to get agitated. The sound of your heels against the marble under your steps was ringing in your mind. You stopped near a waiter, grabbing a glass of champagne. You needed to relax, you needed to look like you belonged here. Alcohol might help you settle down. 

So you went to sit at the first row, crossing your legs as Mephisto left your shoulder to take place on the chandelier hanging above your head. You could see some of the objects being displayed on the stage in front of you. Vases, stuffed animals, jewelry and… Wait. Was that one of Raphayel’s painting ? You frowned while taking your phone out of your purse to take a picture. Before you could press the button, you felt a tap on your shoulder. 

You flinched, turning around. “Miss. Sorry to bother you but you are not allowed to take pictures in this room.” A man with green eyes gazed upon you. He was tall, his hair and lashes almost hiding the gaze that you could feel burning on your face. His face did not seem upset, nor angry. Good… The last thing you needed was to attract angry people. 

You smiled. “Sorry, I just wanted to make sure that painting would interest my husband before I start bidding on it.”  

“Oh ?” He looked up at the stage staring at the painting of the seashore painted with different shades of blue and orange, with the silhouette of a faceless woman dipping her feet in the water. “Hm. It is indeed a wonderful painting. From a very famous painter from Linkon City. Although it is one of his earliest works.” 

“Are you familiar with this painter ?” you asked, interested in the knowledge of the person in front of you. To faint uninterest you slowly raise your glass to your lips looking away from the man.

“Familiar would not be right. We are acquaintances.” He then looks down at you smiling as he circles around the chair to finally sit next to you. “Although we haven’t seen each other for many years.” 

“I see.” you nodded looking at that man dressed in white, your eyes landing on the cross shaped brooch on his tie. You swore you have seen this insignia somewhere. “And you are ?”

“Shh little miss. It’s starting soon. We will have all the leisure to chit chat after that auction is done.” 

The auction began, and you drank the rest of your drink before waving to a waiter to come and get rid of you. Under your seat as under that of all the other participants was a small booklet with the passage numbers of each work or object. The one you were looking for was in last place. A sigh escaped from your lips as the first sums of money were thrown out of control. 

Beside you, still stood this same man, his left leg crossed above the right and his hands clasped on his knees, looking at the scene with a satisfied smile. With the light down, you took the time to linger on her face. He had it very hard, like a man who had to face situations that those of Linkon city did not have to face. But this sweet smile on his lips came in contrast with the portrait that could be made of him. You wondered if Sylus knew the man. You slowly raised your head to look towards Mephisto who was looking straight at you under his watchful red eyes. Just like his master. 

An hour and half passed, and you were starting to get numb to all the money that was being spent. The man next to you also did spend some money. He bought the painting you were eyeing earlier. And then came the mention of the diary. 

As soon as you could, you raised your hand to bid. With a glimpse of mischievousness, the man next to you raised his hand. Followed by some other people in the room. After nearly a minute of bidding, you raised your hand again. 

“Please stop playing sir. My husband is rather interested in this diary.” you muttered to the man next to you. “Stick to your paintings.” 

A suppressed laugh came as an answer as your bid was registered as a final answer. The hand of the man next to you extended towards you as the lights turned on. “It’s a pleasure to be doing business with you, little miss.” 

You frowned looking at the man’s gaze. “Business ?” 

“I am the owner of this building and the organizer of this auction. My name is Castiel, pleasure meeting you.” 

You gasped as you came to shake his hand. Dear god, why did you have to talk like that to the man who setted up a charity auction. This is why his brooch reminded you of something, it was literally plastered in the hall. 

“I am very sorry for my-”

“No offense is taken. Should we talk privately ? I will give you this diary your husband so wishes to have.” he lets go of your hand, getting up before offering his arm. 

“Yes.” you nod as you get up too, sliding your hand on the man’s arm. You were so giddy with the idea of success that you nearly didn’t realize Mephisto was cawing. 

However if you didn’t notice, it was not the case of Castiel that turned his head up towards the bird with a frown. He then asked the security to take care of it, and before you could step in and prevent this from happening, you were dragged into the man’s office. 

Once in his office, he let go of your hand. He headed towards the back of his desk, unlocking what sounded like a chest. In the meantime, you take the time to look around. The place was dark, but golden and green touches enhanced the place. You were basking in a warm light which contrasted with the cold atmosphere that was outside the sacred building. You did not move from the entrance, waiting patiently for you to be given what you had bought. 

“This book was retrieved from a bad man’s hands.” His voice broke the silence that was installed between you two. “If your husband really is interested in this script, you should be careful of him.” He said as he got closer to you handing the overused diary. 

“I will keep that in mind.” you nodded before taking the diary out of this man’s large hands. 

He smiled, flashing his perfect teeth to you. This close, you could see the eyebags between his vibrant eyes. A shiver ran up your back. “I hope our paths will cross again, little miss. If charity is what you are looking for, we could always use new members.” 

Charity… “Sure. I would love to stop by once again. The fate of the N109 zone is very dear to me afterall.” You smiled. 

He hummed. “Smart girl.” his fingers brushed your chin before you stepped back. “We should get going, your husband will surely show up in about a few seconds .”

Before you could answer, Castiel’s hand was on your free wrist and was dragging you out of his office, back into the auction room and in the middle of it stood Sylus. A visibly displeased Sylus. Almost angry. He shouted your name as soon as you came into his vision. The man with dark brown hair let go of your hand softly, placing his hand on your naked back. 

“You should go, little miss. I’d hate for your husband to scare away my guests.” 

You mindlessly nodded as you felt a sensation creeping up your back, and you almost trotted back to Sylus, pushing through the bodyguards preventing him from getting closer to their leader. Once in arms reach, the white haired man pulled you under his arm, hiding you beneath his coat. 

And yet as you were leaving the scene, you could feel Castiel’s gaze burning holes in your back.

[shadow-fell]

Notes on Cazador's Spawn

Mostly for my own reference but hey, someone else might find it useful.

Cazador Szarr becomes the Master Vampire of Baldur's Gate in 1276 (list of master vampires) completing the Rite of Perfect Slaughter on his master, Vellioth.

Astarion's gravestone gives his years as 229-268 DR. There are two assumptions we can make here: the first is that this is just being written without the 1, so he's turned in 1268 DR. The second is that it isn't DR, but instead meant to be Northreckoning - which would make the dates 1261-1300 DR.

We have a few choices here: if it is in DR, either the 1276 date is wrong, or Astarion was somehow turned before Vellioth was killed. Because of that, I think it's a bit easier to assume NR, especially since he's "one of the first" and not "the first". But this is a bit nitpicky.

For the rest of the spawn:

Petras is around ~1390 ("one hundred years eating rats and dogs" from the Flophouse convo)

Yousen is around ~1430 ("only sixty years" after Cazador's defeat)

Dalyria was Physician General to the Parliament of Baldur's Gate (journal). The Parliament of Peers was founded in the mid-1400s, so she would have been turned after this point ~1450

Leon is at least from 1486 (6 years of favored spawn) maximum ~1480 (turned while Victoria is alive based on diary)

Violet and Aurelia have nothing that concrete. However, Violet does offer a prayer to Kelemvor after Cazador's defeat, so I'm going to assume she didn't pick up worship of a new god as a vampire, which makes her turning after Kelemvor's ascension in 1358.

This leaves us with like a century gap, with Astarion (and maybe Aurelia) being turned around 1300 and everyone else in the 1400s. But there's an answer to that as well...Jaheira and Astarion have a party banter

Astarion: Cazador always warned us to stay clear of this neighbourhood. Never said why, though. Jaheira: The last spawn who tried was sunk into the cobblestones and left for the sun to find. I had an unfortunate taste for theatrics, in my youth. Astarion: Ah. Yes, that was probably it.

The original BG games are set 1368/69 - so probably around then or shortly after is when Jaheira killed at least one of the spawn; we can assume there's a few more that got killed and replaced in the 1400s to get back up to magic number seven.

(more on the Szarrs below the cut)

The Szarrs were a merchant family. In 1479, they had been wiped out in an attack that destroyed their home in Tumbledown in the Outer City, leaving only Cliffside Cemetery within large caverns, and which were home to strange lights that could be seen from the river. Rumors about the Szarrs being seen as ghosts were commonplace.

The crypts under the Szarr Mansion we see in BG3 are the Tourmaline Depths, discovered by Donnela Szarr the architect - based on the article while she was Master Vampire in 1138-1204, but potentially earlier. I think it is reasonable to assume that the Depths are connected to the Cliffside Cemetery and Szarr family crypts underground (deeper than the Sewers or Undercity).

Amanita Szarr, or Lady Incognita, has a series of journals dated to 1477 recounting her turning.

Alturiak: describes that she was raised near Anga Vled, and rarely visited her 'Uncle' Cazador

Tarsakh: summoned on her thirteenth birthday

Mirtul: references every living (well, vampire) Szarr as Uncle Cazador, Granddam Fistula, Great-Aunt Dralia, and Cousin Blovart.

Kythorn: describes being turned, imprisoned in the attic. for refusing to participate. Then she drank human blood, and at least a year later, sent up a captive.

Flamerule: "succumbed" and declares herself Lady Incognita.

These span over 6 months (skips Ches after Alturiak). Reasonably, I think these were written during the period of the "captive" sent up, which puts her turning proper probably in 1476, born ~1462. We can probably date the death of her parents to be the killing of the Szarrs, while she was very young. About 15 years before 1479 is perfect time for a ghost story to develop while gangs to take over.

(Anga Vled is a gnomish village between Baldur's Gate and Elturel, along the Risen Road - so not far at all from where Act1/2 are set)

If we assume that the relations Amanita describes are accurate, the tree would look like this. Given that they're an elven family (or at least, Cazador is elven) that means we have a lot of space to work with, timeline wise, but the quotes around 'uncle' might mean he's actually Dralia's son or Amanita's great uncle, to give a bit more space.

??? (Donella Szarr?) |-------| Dralia Fistula |-------|--------| Cazador ??? ??? | | Blovart Amanita

The question is: if the Szarr family are all vampires, then what does it mean that they haven't shown up? And that Vellioth was apparently not a Szarr but was still the Master Vampire (and definitely in charge over Cazador?) Who turned them?

My personal theory goes something like this:

Donnela Szarr, wealthy (but not Patriar) elven merchant has at least two children, Dralia and Fistula (probably not real name because come on)

some time from 1019-1138, Donnela Szarr, while investigating the tombs below her family's estate, encounters Hideous Gathwycke and is turned as his spawn.

1138, Donnela Szarr kills him and becomes Master Vampire

Donnela turns Vellioth

Donnela potentially turns her children to grant them immortal life

1204, Vellioth kills Donnela, becomes Master Vampire

Vellioth takes control of the Szarr family (intimidation, magic, or potentially turning Dralia/Fistula, if they're his spawn and not Donnela's)

Cazador is turned by Vellioth (at least 1260, probably earlier)

1276, Cazador completes the Right of Perfect Slaughter

~1460, other Szarrs die; Amanita sent to the countryside.

~1475 Amanita turned

I imagine that Cazador was fairly young when Donnela was killed (young enough to not be turned yet), and knew Vellioth already, even if it might have been some time before he was turned. I'd put him at no more than 100 when Vellioth becomes Master Vampire; their relationship (and "martinet") feels very 'strict teacher' which makes me wonder if he was a tutor beforehand.

The debate is whether the Szarrs were killed for mundane reasons (rival merchants), by vampire hunters, or by Cazador himself. If he killed them, it might be for refusal to let him turn them into vampires (Blovart as the exception), or some level of sibling rivalry? Amanita's parents are presumably not vampires since she was turned, but that doesn't remove the chance of monster hunters.

Based on the timeline, Blovart may have died sometime after Lady Incognita's entries, placing Leon as his replacement for the seven spawn (maybe the Favoured Spawn room was his by default, and became a competition after? The fact it only goes back 6 years is interesting). Perhaps related to how she left or died herself.

Dralia and Fistula's absence might be that they don't live with him, but I could also see if they discovered the Rite of Ascension and tried to usurp him and got killed for it. Cazador is fascinated by the idea of family, and I could see him very much wanting to keep his family intact but also has no qualms about killing his own mother / aunt if they actually posed a threat to his real goals.

All of this + the Lady Incognita stuff is very rough, presumably a lot of it having been cut with the Upper City/shift in direction for Cazador's story. For more links/information, there's also this masterlist.

[dearweirdme]

I saw one of your followers asking about Jungkook living in a different dorm than Jimin due to him being a cook and that that information came from a Korean JJK. I cannot answer in the comments because I don't have an account, I'm sorry. Anyways, please take that information with a grain of salt. The Korean JJK lied about the diary entry that was written by Jungkook and was leaked, was fake. Just for the ministry of defense to come out to say that the diary entry was leaked and that they would investigate who leaked it and would punish said person. Said Korean JJK also lied about Jimin and Jungkook being in a different unit after their basic training which was proven wrong already. After that was debunked, they started to say Jungkook is never seeing Jimin due to him being a cook but then people found an interview with two ex-soldiers who had enlisted through the buddy system where one of them was also a cook while the other wasn't and they talked about how they still say each other everyday and how they shared the same room. Which actually also is said in the description of the buddy system on the official sites. That until the end of their service they will be in the same unit and will be living in the same dormitory. After that the account also lied about Jungkook not participating in the KCTC training which was then disproven by multiple people who either were part of the KCTC training themselves or by family members of soldiers that participated in the KCTC training who said that cooks had to do the normal training with all the regular soldiers. Plus Jungkook is in the pictures that were posted with Jimin, at least it looks like him. So please take the information said Korean JJK is posting always with a grain of salt. They have a habit of lying when they don't like the real information.

Hi anon!

I basically take everything that’s being said about them during enlistment with a grain of salt. Without them with us, it’s basically different kinds of fans going against each other and a lot of people/accounts looking for a bit of attention by mentioning them.

I also don’t understand why this has to be such a big deal. Jm and Jk have lived together as part of BTS for years. They now probably live together because of being in the same unit. The companion system as I understand it now is that the two persons enlisting together have each other during the whole time.. so it makes sense that Jm and Jk share living space. While Jkkrs make that into some romantic scheme.. it’s quite likely they just lie in their assigned beds scrolling through their phones or maybe enjoying time with fellow soldiers when they’re not working. I don’t get why some Tkkrs find this hard to accept.. unless you just want to go hard against Jkkrs and therefore need to put some space between them.

I don’t like the idea of any if BTS feeling alone. So aside from what their real situation is.. if they are actually sharing a room.. good on them for having each other. Jm and Jk sharing a living space isn’t Jkkrs winning.

[shiteatinggrin]

hi so @sunshinemarauder tagged me to rec my five favourite fivs of mine, good thing is i've only written five yet!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/39805371 wrote this one hen i was ridiculously in love with some guy who ended up being my bf it's lily's diary of pining for james for one whole summer and i just reread it now it was not half bad

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31418771 this was based on a prompt on tumblr, i have a thing for jily in the last year of their lives, here james is feeling down and his wife tries to do something about it

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31347170 a jily office au i wanted to read it could not find it so wrote it myself i think it is really cute n jim n pam have a very special bond i wanted to try to recreate

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27288415 this one is maybe my favourite one ive written because no matter how many times ive reread it ive never been ashamed of it and just wonder how i wrote it so yeah it makes me happy. lily reflecting on james when he dies in front of her (another jily in hiding)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26315530/chapters/64078543 left my first one for last. i dont really know how she holds up but she was written with a lot of love and care. this is a 10 things i hate about you au and i reworked the plot a bit, it also has a bit of blackinnon and i think a wolfstar epilogue so i kinda changed my mind on sirius at some point. i mean even now i dont know where i stand. i think i just like both ships!

i've been thinking recently of writing something else, it's been a long time so i might be rusty but i was thinking of participating in the jilytoberfest, so watch out! maybe you'll see me with something new soon, i'll see with my muse

[historicalpixelpeople]

Fall 1891 - Edmund Stallings

Diary Entry of Edmund Stallings

Despite only having been a short time since my arrival, it seems that with each passing day at college, I uncover new facets of myself and my interests. Over the past week, I have been attending various lectures and participating in different campus activities. This was in attempt to try and find new things to keep myself busy so I did not miss home as much and to find a few new colleagues that held similar interests.

Among the many opportunities, I was particularly drawn to the debates. My siblings and I had spent many days arguing back home but I did not enjoy the screaming aspect of the angry, personal attacks from my siblings. I thought I would not enjoy watching or partaking in such an organization, but I gave it a try. I attended one of their meetings this morning and was immediately captivated by it.

As the debate progressed, I couldn’t help but imagine myself participating, standing before my peers and defending my own viewpoints with fervor and conviction.

I have met a young lady named Eva who moved in a bit late. Eva is, in many ways, a whirlwind of energy and spirit. Her opinions are not merely voiced but defended with a fervor that is both admirable and, at times, overwhelming. The first time we encountered each other, she corrected me about our historical studies. I had never been corrected before and the shock wore off before I could talk to her. I hope we continue to pass ways.

Kellan and I have been spending a lot of time studying together. He is a bit older than I am and has more experience than I have had with the world. His family has never enjoyed the same financial comforts that mine does. His early years have given him a unique perspective on the issues of class and politics, which he has generously shared with me. I am ashamed to admit that I never had considered the people with less than my family before. Maybe that was due to my family protecting me from the harsh realities of the world or my willingness to not look too closely at the outside world.

I have spent many days this week writing home to my mother and father. They tell me that Mayme and her husband, Harrison, have fallen upon some trouble with Harrison's business. I hope it is nothing too serious but I have written to her many times but all have gone unanswered. I worry about her often and wish I could travel home to check on her but for now, I will settle for unanswered letters.

It is getting late, so I must end it here.

-Edmund

[numinousmysteries]

21, 23, 24 for Samantha Mulder~! :DDD

21. If you're a fic writer and have written for this character, what's your favorite thing to do when you're writing for this character? What's something you don't like? I don't think I've actually ever written anything with Samantha as an active character (instead of just being referenced) but maybe this is a sign I should? If I were to write about her, I'd be interested in the years in between her abduction and her death. This line in her diary from Closure is so devastating—"they treat me like I'm an old suitcase they can just drag around and open up whenever they want to"—and I'd want to explore how that trauma affected her. Also, she made the incredibly brave decision to run away and I'd like to get inside her head as she made that choice. I probably wouldn't write anything AU where she's actually alive and ends up returning as an adult and interacting with Mulder and Scully. That's just less interesting to me personally, but I'd never say never.

23. Favorite picture of this character?

It's a tie between the images of her in Demons (just loved the coloring/lighting in these flashbacks)...

...and this still from the home video in Dreamland II. Probably the only time we see a happy scene in the Mulder family:

24. What other character from another fandom of yours that reminds you of them?

Hmm I don't really participate in other fandoms so I'm trying to just think of another character she reminds me of and I'm kind of drawing a blank! I feel like we didn't get a ton of information on her as a person (besides just being Mulder's missing sister) so I don't feel like I know enough about her to make a comparison. Curious to hear if anyone else has ideas!

[xknivesandpensx]

Like Pieces of a Puzzle

Chapter 15

Summary: What if Harry wasn't the only extra student called upon to participate in the Triwizard Tournament? Far from the most popular candidate, Draco not only has to take on the trials but also deal with his unexpected feelings for Hermione. Will he be able to face the challenges as well as follow his heart? Chapter length will vary. I'll be referencing both the books and movie versions. Some things from what I've previously written will be mentioned, all of which you can find here.  And for those who asked to be tagged: @dayane245love

Hermione made her way through the crowded corridors and up the winding staircase with ease. She lightly knocked on the door, choosing to enter despite the lack of a verbal reply, assuming Moody may be up in his office. The chamber fell into an almost eerie quietness, everything still except for the spiders moving inside the small jars.

She walked past empty tables and to the room above, her fingers lightly trailing along the railing in the process. Once again, Hermione tapped her knuckles on the door only to be met by nothing more than silence.

Although, she intended to leave and search elsewhere or perhaps try another day, a rather loud thumping sound caused her to stall. After taking a breath, Hermione quieted her nerves and peered inside. A roaring fire illuminated the space in hues of yellow and orange, showing an otherwise ordinary backdrop. Moody’s large trunk rested near the wall, almost out of place.

Hermione almost instinctually reached out towards it, yet something else caught her attention. A warped, black book rested on the table; one she remembered quite well despite its damaged appearance. A large hole splintered through the middle, looking very much like Harry explained it back in their second year. She took hold of the diary and absently flipped through the pages. The parchment was stiff and difficult to peel apart.

“You might want to put that down.” The gruff voice caused Hermione to jump. Moody paid no mind to her reaction. His magic eye shifted around quickly, making sure everything remained how he left it.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to come in without permission. I heard a strange sound. Maybe I imagined it.” She cleared her throat some prior to continuing. “If you don’t mind me asking, why is Tom Riddle’s Diary here?”

“That’s between me and Dumbledore.” Moody outstretched his hand and put it aside once she relinquished possession. “I’m assuming you came here for a reason?”

“Yes, actually.” She paused momentarily as he took a long swig from his flask. “I was wondering if you found out anything new regarding Harry and Draco being selected for the tournament. I worked out how well enough. Different schools, the use of a Confundus Charm. I just can’t put together why or who for instance.”

Hermione thought it quite strange how she felt the need for company whenever Moody came close. His reputation proceeded him, according to Ron anyway. Hyper-suspicious and skeptical, if not overly realistic when it came to the Dark Arts. His lessons were abrasive, to say the least. His choice of detentions hardly sat well either.

“It’s a matter for the professors to handle. Still, impressive work figuring out so much on your own,” Moody replied, attempting to determine her threat level when it came to his intended goal. “You’re a bright, young witch. Very keen on details often missed.”

Barty thought himself rather safe while undercover. He had a sufficient amount of Polyjuice Potion on supply. However, he knew Snape would eventually begin picking up on his missing ingredients. As for the fourth year before him, he knew little of her. Muggle-born. Exceptional grades. And most importantly, a close friend of Harry Potter.

Maybe he made a mistake by adding Malfoy into the tournament. It certainly didn’t help lower the questions, but little could be done now. Barty hardly relished the idea of Lucius coming to watch the competition. He needed to keep himself in check, if he aimed to conceal his real identity.

“Unless you’ve got any leads you’d like to share, it’d be best to get going. I have a lot of work to do.” Moody sidestepped her to get to his desk.

Compliments aside, Hermione intended to persist her point. “It’s obvious a person in the school is involved and I have a terrible feeling that something horrible is going to happen. Which is why I think it’s imperative to figure out who’s responsible. The only plausible connection I’ve gathered is it being a staff member. Based on the reaction of the other headmasters and their students, I can’t see them happy about having four additional competitors against their own opposed to two. And as disagreeable it is, Hogwarts holds a track record of professors going after Harry.”

She wanted him to believe her suspicion partly fell on him to witness his initial reaction. As expected, he gave almost nothing away. His quick veer in her direction showed her a small glimpse of worry. No more than a single instance though. It vanished immediately.

Moody kept himself busy, pretending to rummage through a few papers. “Quite a theory. And how exactly does it pertain to Draco Malfoy? Certainly, he scurried away from any potential danger over the years. His whole family is like that. Cowards, they are.”

“Well, you’ve blatantly made your disapproval of him known.” Hermione stopped herself from mentioning the punishment Moody gave Draco in case it got him in further trouble and instead redirected her statement. “I imagine there are others who don’t appreciate the ideals he grew up learning.”

She found her suspicion rising. In reality, she had nothing, no evidence. Dumbledore appointed him the position because they shared a lasting friendship and trust. So, why did she feel off regarding his hiring?

“I would hate to think you’re accusing me of having a hand in this whole thing, Miss Granger. Often students, such as yourself, find themselves in trouble for thinking they found the answer when it turns out their assumptions were wrong. Then you waste too much energy on the incorrect party.” He realized her trust in him faltered, sensed it almost. “I think it’s high time you’re on your way out. If you have any doubts, speak to Dumbledore and he’ll clear them up. I’m here for the sole purpose of teaching the proper way to defend yourselves. If anything, I’m hoping Mr. Potter pulls through.”

“But not Draco?” The question left her deprived of warning. Hermione hesitated, choosing not to try and fix the way her voice sounded, how it indicated her own fear. “He could die just as easily.”

Moody approached, meeting her steady gaze. “His family has quite a lot of dark ties. Something you better remember before you go trying to stick your nose into the things any further. Now off with you.”

Hermione pressed her lips together, preventing herself from saying anything more. He clearly wished to end the conversation, so she obliged and left the room. Already too much occupied her mind. Although Moody seemed reliable from a general point of view, she wavered when it came to actually believing his innocence. Yet to accuse him so readily felt as bad as thinking the one responsible for the Chamber of Secrets was Hagrid. Hermione required more information, a solidified clue to base her ideals on. When would the chance to dig further arrive? Perhaps the library may once more come in handy. If not for the late hour, she’d go there now.

Rather, Hermione slowly headed back to the common room. She didn’t expect to see the Hogwarts champions. Cedric gave a polite smile of which she returned, however Draco avoided meeting her gaze completely. He sauntered by, lacking any indication of noticing her at all. If he had looked, she knew exactly what the effect of making eye contact would produce. She was probably fooling herself to think he drew closer on purpose as they passed and she was hit, regardless, by a sensation of butterflies rapidly flapping their wings inside her stomach. The moment she stabilized her breathing, Hermione saw Harry trailing further behind the rest.

“I honestly didn’t think they’d keep you so long,” Hermione commented, slowing down to a full stop. Despite her qualms, she kept herself composed. “Sorry to say, but Neville got a rather poor grade. His potion came out all wrong.”

“I sort of expected as much.” Harry sighed. Snape’s class seemed so far away, almost as if the importance of it dwindled significantly between then and now. “Rita Skeeter conducted our interviews. She’s going to make me out as some kid who’s distraught over the death of his parents. Of course, it bothers me terribly, but not so much then that my eyes were glistening with the ghosts of my past.”

“I don’t understand why they’d use her of all people.” Hermione shook her head, starting to walk once more. “I’m sure not everyone believes what they read in the paper, Harry. It may not even be as bad as you think.”

“Yeah, maybe.” He attempted to shake it off, not wanting to indulge his irritation. “I shouldn’t be involved in the competition in the first place. Malfoy, surprisingly, looks like he’s taking it in stride. For the most part. He just enjoys the attention, I suppose.”

Hermione knew as much, seeing as his attempts to gain it weren’t exactly well hidden. If she took a deeper look, played the very few scenes she witnessed between himself and his family in her head, a different side of him emerged. Not so diverse from the boy she hardly knew, nonetheless new aspects came to life.

“Hold on a moment.” Harry lightly grabbed hold of Hermione’s arm to prevent her from going further up the staircase. He might as well say it before they reached the common room. “Malfoy and I got into a bit of an argument and well, if he starts bothering you, more so than usual anyway, it’s likely my fault.”

For whatever reason, he felt awkward uttering the words, a little less so than if surrounded by others. Harry looked up at her, having stopped her one step ahead of himself, and saw a slight altercation in her expression prior to any verbal reply.

“I’m perfectly capable of handling myself.” She tried her best to lose her defensive tone, choosing to grip the railing as if the action helped steady her voice. “I understand how difficult the whole thing must be for you, but getting into fights won’t help any. What did you say?”

Harry almost let his vexation of the situation out. How could she or anyone else possibly understand what he was going through? He forced himself to swallow the retort, letting it settle unevenly.

“I asked him what’s going on between the two of you. I don’t think he appreciated the question. I mean, I can’t be the only one noticing it.” He shrugged, hoping to portray the innocence in the reason behind the inquiry. “When I told him to leave you alone, he said he’d do exactly the opposite.”

Hermione wondered what he meant by it. She tried so hard to maintain her feelings. Whenever Draco came near, she lost all ability to think straight. He chased away a level of security she encased her heart in years ago, when he started treating her poorly back in their second year.

“Oh.” The syllable quietly left her lips, as if the news appeared inconsequential. “Honestly, I’m not overly worried. In fact, Malfoy will be so busy, I suppose he’ll hardly remember saying one thing or another. On a different note, I was going to get started on some homework. I could help you with Transfiguration, if you need it. I know you’re having a bit of trouble.”

Although Harry noticed the change of topic, he welcomed it. “Yeah, sure. I doubt I’ll have loads of time to do it later. I can barely keep my attention in class since the first task’s just around the corner. Whatever it might be.”

It surprised Hermione, once they passed through the entrance into the common room, that Ron willingly approached. Yet he did no more than mumble a sentence or two and shove a letter into Harry’s hands, lacking so much as a goodbye before returning to Dean’s side.

“It’s from Sirius.” Harry beckoned her towards the window, allowing Hermione to cover him from prying eyes. He hastily tore it open, quick to read its contents. “He wants to talk face-to-face by the fire at one in the morning on the twenty-second of November. He said it's too risky to say everything he'd like to incase the owl was intercepted.”

[pynkhues]

do you mind sharing why that showrunner rubbed you the wrong way? totally get it if not, just curious as to what kind of dynamics can form in zoom workshops like that

Sure, anon, I don't mind at all!

Basically I'm in a database of emerging and developing writers that my state film body maintains, and as a part of that I sometimes get invited to apply to participate in creative and professional development opportunities. I've gotten into a few actually, which is always exciting (especially since the state film body pays for it, haha, so it's free for me if I'm accepted in) - my favourite one I ever did was with Meg LeFauve who wrote Inside Out and Captain Marvel, among many other things, and was just genuinely so wonderful and generous with her knowledge and encouragement.

This particular one though was basically a full day of back-to-back one hour sessions over Zoom, and the whole day was pretty great and stacked with Australian and overseas talent. I did (among others - these are just the ones I remember off the top of my head) a session with Prentice Penny (Insecure), Sierra Teller Ornelas (Rutherford Falls), Lucy Prebble (Succession and Secret Diary of a Call Girl), Jo Werner (Dance Academy and Surviving Summer), and Craig Mazin (Chernobyl, The Last of Us).

I'm kinda saying this to give context to the fact that the day itself was A Lot, and was really about giving a lot of different insights to a lot of different creative processes and professional writing environments, and I think one of the reasons Craig rubbed me the wrong way so much was that his approach really jarred with the other writers. In all the other workshops, the writers had emphasised the value of collaboration, supporting other writers, and expressed a really deep love of film and TV not just as an industry, but as an artform.

Craig writes alone - he wrote every episode of Chernobyl and has written every episode of The Last of Us except for two episodes he co-wrote with the creator of the game - which was a fact he emphasised a few times, and he felt really dismissive overall of any voice that wasn't his own. He hosts an entire podcast on screenwriting, which he talked about a lot, and talked about how he enjoys talking to other writers, but won't watch their work because he doesn't like watching movies and TV shows, and he basically bagged out TV as a medium outside of the work he himself was creating. He just came across as intensely arrogant to me, and while everyone else was offering advice and guidance in their sessions, Craig really just... talked about himself.

I don't know, maybe my thoughts would've been different if I'd seen his session in isolation of the others, but I've referred to my notebook from that day plenty of times since, and his is the only workshop that I took literally zero notes in. It's also - - mmm - - maybe telling of other things too? Given every other writer throughout the day was either BIPOC or a woman, I have in hindsight thought that the importance of seeing and supporting stories by diverse voices and building up your industry has very different meaning for writers that aren't straight white men like Craig, but I don't know. All I know is that I left his session with a bit of a bad taste in my mouth.

[manonamora-if]

Retrospective 2022 (4)

Last post, I promise!

After looking back in the past, time to look forward!

Going back to the super cool infographic I made, there's still a lot. BUT, I will try to follow a resolution this year:

Get things off my desk and shelf it for good.

I honestly have too many working projects on my hands, too many "completed" projects I should finish (or give a nice send off like I did for Meeting the Parents). So this will be my goal for this year: finish and shelf as many projects as I can.

To this, I was tempted to add and not starting any new ones. But knowing myself, that's not something that I can realistically promise. With a couple of jams and comps I had planned on participating/hoped to take part since last year, I have a feeling there will be a few additions to the game pile by the end of the year. Will this be a terrible idea? 100%. Will that stop me from trying to squeeze a few jams/comps? Nope. Not at all. I have no self control...

With that announced, the more detailed expectations/schedule with no date below the cut.

OH! and continue to do word crimes :P

The "list" should be the planned arrangement (first to last) for the year. Unless I get bored and change my mind. Because, let's be honest, that's what my brain does best...

I won't give any timeline, because I can't keep it and I can't seem to be able to predict how much time all this work will take me. Maybe I'll be quick, maybe I won't. But I'll announce the release/updates about a week or two in advance.

P-Rix - Space Trucker

What I had been working on during the End-of-Year Holidays was editing the missing content and code it. This will include opening the world to the player and introducing new mechanics (technically already coded but missing the flavour text).

Since the UI is currently static, playing it on mobile is not advised. It will be a headache, but that needs to be done. Also needed: more QoL settings (animation toggle, timer/typewriter amount etc...).

On this blog, expect an actual shareable Intro Post with all relevant links/features sometimes... *shrugs*

La Petite Mort

Because of the 4h time constraint of the EctoComp, I wasn't able to include all rooms I wanted to include. You were supposed to explore the whole house/garden and not the current available rooms/space, and interact more with other NPCs. A proper/more-than-one-line ending was drafted too. The journal would get crossed off then a task was completed, and you'd get some codex/diary when finding some stuff about the Grandma.

So that's the plan on the addition (with some quick UI edits for the Dialog boxes). And the English translation to go along (because you should all be able to experience this fun puzzle/quest bit.

Oh! and an actual Intro Post as well.

Goncharov Escapes!

Made quickly and not edited before posting, Gonchy needs a bit of TLC. I also want it to fit the whole vibe I'm going for with all my projects (the logo/manonamora presents/etc...).

And a French translation (because I can/want to share my games in different languages). Since there are like 4k words total, it might not take me too long. When I get to it.

Exquisite Cadaver

Planned already for the last semester, but didn't get to it (yay writer's block!). Well not completely. I did open my file during the autumn, but didn't write more than a handful of words. The main issue with this project is that all rounds have an ending (distinct from the other endings) which have not yet been written or drafted (unlike the actual rounds). So I am left with 15-20 workable/potentially playable rounds but no endings. And, stubborn as I am, I don't want to upload a round without its linked ending.

So writing, editing, coding, writing, editing, coding, etc...

Maybe a complete release this year? Big Question Mark on it.

ALSO: that is when the whole game is done, I would want to try and port it into French. There are some HUGE challenges (gendered languages/adjectives going before OR after the noun/etc...), but it's something I'd want to take a crack at. BUT, that's like super future. Next year or year after that timeline-wise.

The Trials and Tribulations of Edward Harcourt

Chapter 3 coming when the edits are done. The ball is in MelS's court, but we are in the final round of editing (after more back and forth than the other chapters, we kept bickering about some sentences).

Any further update is dependent on MelS and the free time he has. Chapter 3 may be the only update this year, or maybe we'll have a couple more after it. We will seeeee...

The Thick Table Tavern

Now we are really going into the maybe territory. This would be dependent on the time/energy because there are a lot of things in there that either need fixing, re-coding, adding. Because this was always a large project, it won't be something easy to get off my desk (unlike the ones above).

BUT, if the stars align and ladida...

Addition to the story would come only in form of storylets (like the ones currently in the game) and other events (like the Brom shenanigan). Ideally, I would want to add the recurrent NPCs, but the 14-day story would need some/a lot of re-organising.

Opening the possibility of playing the full 14 days or creating a way to spend the coins earned.

Achievements!

Fixing/Balancing the mixing elements

More stuff that is written on a paper at home somewhere in a drawer...

I know some of you would want this to be ported for mobile, but I don't think it would be realistic considering the Bar Gameplay/UI. I might take a crack at it, but don't hold your breath for that one.

Crimson Rose & White Lily

The I really want to update this but words are not coming out project. The I definitely went over my head with this one project. But also the I promise this is not abandoned project. After updating the story 3 times last year (with the last one getting a long edit/re-write), I've had a hard time continuing/going back to the story itself.

If I can't get Scene 5 out this year (which is probable, it looks to be chunky), I would like to try to get one small variation out at least (the Scene 2 secret forking or the Harbour afternoon). Even that, I can't promise it happening. All dependent on the above projects.

Honestly, my only hope is being able to start writing more than 10 words on the document at this point... Maybe even if it is just a prompt.

SugarCube Template

Obviously this is coming back! Creating weird templates is really fun. And I want to create more shapes (like maybe a circle/oval?) with the page.

There's that promised Space/Sci-Fi one that are still not here (my SeedComp! entry will probably become that, but in a more simple form, and mobile accessible).

Since I've been working on adding more accessibility in my projects (hopefully it actually works for people), I've been wondering if having a basic Settings/Accessibility Macro Template could be useful to people. Like a Copy-Paste for the JavaScrip/CSS for Font Change, Toggle for Animation/Notification, Theme Change, KeyBinding. I might even try to get through the Audio macros once and for all and create a volume slider/mute button. If there are other options I should take into consideration, let me know!

SPS Iron Hammer

That's a super long reach. I would actually be amazed if I make some progress on this project honestly. Especially if I finish the ones above. The only reason I would start the re-writes of SPS IH without having completed the projects above would be because I threw the whole schedule out the window. I am trying not to do that.

Long story short on what is planned:

Puzzles!

More day-to-day job stuff (with more interactivity for each)

A nicer Codex page and functioning stats bars.

Mysteries :o

A brawl.

And more :P

Other

Didn't I just say I'd try not to be involved in Jams/Comps this year? Welp I lied.

There's the @seedcomp-if that I am involved with. Round 2 which is starting soon and last until March 1st. Since I released a seed for the first round, I do want to make a small 5-10min entry for the second one (think Gonchy size/style).

Having done that, I am kind of interested in organising smaller Jams (à-la Fortnight Fiction during the height of Covid or the Sci-Fi Twine one last month). I'll wait until the SeedComp is further ongoing, maybe somewhere in March to plop something. Probably with a word count/time limit.

Also, the @if-confessions's box is still open. Feel free to drop something! It's all anonymous :) It's been fun to get stuff and add to The Discourse TM. Would be nice to get more positive/happy ones tho...

And finally, #coding support is still a thing. Still ongoing. Still down to make tutorials, even for small/basic stuff. Just drop an ask with your question!

I missed answering coding questions...

That should be it? A lot planned, a lot of things I hope to achieve, a lot I will prob not do because I decided to just do jams this year :P Who knows!

2023 is going to be fun!

Last note: I should try to play a few more games/WIPs, and write some reviews...

[kaizsche]

hi, everyone!! this is my ao3 wrapped! (i for real almost forgot to post this... sorry i haven't been writing/posting lately, i've been busy with events here and i'm working as a cleaner/typesetter for a scanlation team! we are quite understaffed and have multiple projects to work on so...🥺🥺)

How many words have you written this year?

92,601k!!!  (excluding my wips) wtf i wrote A LOT??

How many works did you publish this year?

31 aiuhdiagdadad

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

easy. skuld’s net - that one shot came to me so suddenly and i wrote it for 3 days straight w/o no breaks whatsoever!!!

What work of yours has the most hits?

my star wars one shot fic - the july writing challenge i believe is at 6,544 hits

What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

my first ever tvd fic, the one inspired by arctic monkey’s 505. 

Favorite title you used

in the art of flaw, the bridgerton au fic (shoutout to my friend who helped me make it cause im not exactly great at titles lmao

If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

young the giant!!! their songs are just *chef's kiss*

Pairing you wrote the most for this year?

this is such an obvious question if you frequently visit my blog. Elejah and klena!!!!!1

Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?

elejah is a ship i’d die for but i think i love writing finnlena the most cause they’re sooo in tune with one another. at least i think they would’ve been if esther did not manipulate him. (i just love finn okay. cause he's so underappreciated?)

What work was the quickest to write?

skuld’s net (a klena fic) i wrote that thing for 3 effin days straight, looped lany’s 13 over and over and over again. (i wasnt aware of his allegations that time so…)

What work took you the longest to write?

in terms of published fics, i think it’s take my breath. it was created on oct 19 then i picked it up a maybe 2-3 weeks ago? then posted it on dec 4 so yeah

How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

i lost count. there is just too many of them.

What’s your longest work of the year?

the one shot fic writing challenge.

What’s your shortest work of the year?

It’s a lil fic which idea i got from a prompt generator in tumblr - i was quite new back then so i thought that maybe participating in it won’t hurt me. It’s called 709 which is inspired by one of my wips wherein elena returned to the past after death and tried to change her life.

What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

Oh boy, OH BOY this is a long list. I’ll be taking them all with me but the most noteworthy wips would have to be my princess diaries au and the miracle baby au fic for elejah + the elena & katherine time travel fic

What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

Probably unedited as hell and kol is a little shit

Your favorite character to write this year?

I think finn. his character in canon is just so unexplored (i haven’t watched the originals so…) and it’s so, so fun to explore his character and adding more to his background.

The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

I feel... elijah? Cause i am most certainly not as eloquent as he is with words, so i usually find it hard to write his dialogues and stuff in my fics. (but honestly, i have a hard time with all mikaelsons lmfao)

What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

I want to explore more of wyler!! (wednesday x tyler) since i’ve just recently joined the fandom and have four wips in my drafts already.

Which work of yours have you reread the most?

I think i have an almost unhealthy obsession with re-reading my work. But it definitely has to be heaven help the fool who falls in love like… i love re-exploring my old ideas (and also wondering where that ‘writer me’ in that era went (cause i literally had to write every single day and not miss a single one whilst delivering good pieces was beyond me.)

How many kudos in total did you get this year?

I’ve got 1,812!

Which work has the most comments?

with 100 comment threads, it’s not at all surprising that its my may writing challenge tvd fic

Did you do any collaborative works this year?

I don’t think i did?

Did you write any gifts this year?

i did for the wyler secret santa event and one for @qvnthesia

Did you receive any gifts this year?

@qvnthesia and i are exchanging fics later this month, so yep! I’m quite excited for that!

What’s your most common category?

easy. f/m

What do you listen to while writing?

I made spotify playlists for each of my pairings, actually. so when i write for a specific ship like klena - i usually turn the volume up for some good ol 505.

Favorite work you wrote this year?

the love of a doppelganger. there’s just something about this fic that i can’t put into words. (it’s my finnlena one) i think it’s about the prospect of giving finn’s character a second chance whilst shedding light as to why his decisions, and his siblings had came to the point of, well, daggering him.

Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

Oh my gosh, as a person whohas short term memory this question is quite hard to answer. Lol. but this line just IDK IT MAKES ME FEEL A CERTAIN WAY, OKAY?!

“You will learn to love me just as you have loved Anakin Skywalker.” He breathes, a promise dressed in the trappings of a threat.

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?

What honestly surprised me the most is what the tvd fandom did to me, tbh. i’ve been writing fics since 2017, but i’ve never been much hyperfixated like i was with tvd – i think that it also helped me that the fandom has an active community, AND tight-knitted as well we even have a discord server and follow each other on tumblr. So, yeah. I basically not only owe it to the wonderful TVD character (sans the salvatores, thank you.) but also to the people that inspired me, supported me and cheered me on with my fics! (i’m looking at you, @sunless-garden, @qvnthesia,  @wazman, @katherineholmes, @amandamonroe, @finnismyoriginalsin, @sevensistersofsussex, and everyone else!!

[figsandfandoms]

✨2022 Writing Year In Review✨

I was tagged by @lassiesspanishaccent​ so here goes!

1. Number of stories posted to AO3: 25!! Holy Hannah. That’s a bit skewed by the fact that I participated in Flufftober this year.

2. Word count posted for the year:  62,626

3. Fandoms I wrote for: Psych and SG-1

4. Pairings: I was quite the multi-shipper this year lol

Juliet/Shawn (Psych)

Daniel/Vala (SG-1)

Gus/Selene (Psych)

Carlton/Marlowe (Psych)

Carlton/Shawn (Psych)

Shawn/Gus (Psych)

5. Story with the most: 

Kudos: “One night in the chief’s office”  (225 Kudos)

Bookmarks: “One night in the chief’s office” 49 Bookmarks)

Comments: “You've got comments “ (56 Comment Threads)

6. Work I’m most proud of (and why): 

I think I answered this question in another AO3 round up or review, so hopefully I answer it the same this time haha.

But I think I’m most proud of two works: How many one-night stands equals a relationship? and One night in the chief’s office.

For How many one-night stands equals a relationship?, I’d say I’m proud of the poetry of it.

For One night in the chief’s office, it was my first major M/M smut, and I’m proud of how it turned out, and proud of myself for pushing through with it.

7. Work I’m least proud of (and why):

I honestly don’t know. This has given me the opportunity to read over some of the fics that don’t get a lot of attention, but I’m still proud of them and proud that I wrote them.

Do I think that the writing could have been better, that maybe I could have spell-checked a little more? Sure. But I wrote something and created something. So, I’m proud of them.

8. Share or describe a favourite review you received:

Oh gosh. Like Swattie said, I love each and every comment I’ve received. I don’t think I’ve deleted any of them from my inbox! (side note, does the AO3 inbox have a limit???).

That being said…

The ones that really stick out are the times when people have told me I’ve written the characters ‘in character’. The characters I wrote for are an eclectic bunch, and getting their tone and style of speaking down pat can be hard. So I love it when people tell me that I write them in characters.

9. A time when writing was really, really hard:

Hmm… I’d say maybe the beginning of 2022, when I got such a horrible round of migraines. At least two a week for about a month or so. Back then, opening my eyes was hard, let alone writing a fic.

10. A scene or character you wrote that surprised you:

Writing for Cam in Cameron Mitchell's Diary was kind of surprising. The idea for the story came outta nowhere, and I hadn’t really thought of writing from Cam’s perspective.

11. A favourite excerpt of your writing:

I’m gonna cheat and pick two:

From ‘How many one-night stands’

He nods, and they kiss and hug and touch and undress each other and try to make each other feel good because they know this feeling won’t last long. He pours kindness and caring into every clash of teeth and tongue, telling her without words that it’ll be okay, that she’ll be okay.

I hit the poetry hard with this story, but this is my favourite line.

From ‘You’ve got comments’

Shawn thought for approximately 8.5 seconds before he enacted his plan. It was twice as long as he normally spent looking before leaping, so he gave himself a literal pat on the back before starting.

That line makes me giggle.

12. How did you grow as a writer this year:

I took more risks this year, and my writing has improved.

13. How do you hope to grow next year:

By doing what I did last year- keep trying new things and seeing what happens.

14. Who was your greatest positive influence this year as a writer (could be another writer or beta or cheerleader or muse etc etc):

The Santa Barbara After Dark discord! Swattie, Birdy, Noz, Avotah, Aut… You all are so amazing!

I’ll also be sappy and say my husband is my biggest cheerleader. He cheers me on and takes over household chores so I can write. He’s my best friend and I love him. Love you babe!

15. Anything from your real life show up in your writing this year:

Chapter four of Flufftober- Psych stories was partly inspired by my husband and the way he supports my powerlifting.

16. Any new wisdom you can share with other writers:

New wisdom? I don’t think it’s ‘new’, but I would say ‘don’t be afraid to write something different’. you never know what might happen.

17. Any projects you’re looking forward to starting (or finishing) in the new year:

I’ve got a couple of WIPs that are almost finished that I’m looking forward to getting over the line.

Other than that, I’ve got a couple of ideas that I’d like to get started on, as well as an original work.

18. Tag some writers whose answers you’d like to read.

@emachinescat @missmultifandommessdom @r1ver-6r-6

[kestrellady]

Book Riot's 2022 Read Harder Challenge

Challenge Link

Complete 24/24

A good "get out of your comfort zone" reading challenge. This is my 4th year participating.

Finished with a day to spare!

Full list below the cut.

1. Read a biography of an author you admire. Gone to the Woods by Gary Paulsen More a memoir than a biography, but a really interesting look at the early life of a very formative author for me.

2. Read a book set in a bookstore. The Cat Who Saved Books by Sōsuke Natsukawa Japanese books with cats seems to be a winning combination for me. Lots of discussion of loss and how to move on.

3. Read any book from the Women’s Prize shortlist/longlist/winner list. The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller I don't usually do tragedies, but this one worked for me! Maybe because they pretty deliberately chose the tragedy? And it ended on a semi-hopeful note.

4. Read a book in any genre by a POC that’s about joy and not trauma. Wash Day Diaries by Jamila Rowser and Robyn Smith A fun graphic novel revolving around four friends, their daily lives, friendship, and hair.

5. Read an anthology featuring diverse voices. Elemental Magic, edited by Mercedes Lackey I love Lackey's Elemental Magicians series and this is a whole bunch of authors writing stories set throughout time and around the world.

6. Read a nonfiction YA comic. U.S. Ghost Army by Nel Yomtov and Alessandro Valdrighi This was a surprisingly difficult prompt. I thought this story of the "Ghost Army" in WWII lent itself to a visual medium.

7. Read a romance where at least one of the protagonists is over 40. This is How You Lose the Time War by Max Gladstone and Amal El-Mohtar This was an interesting and sweet read, even if I still feel like immortals is a bit cheating for this prompt.

8. Read a classic written by a POC. Rashomon and Other Stories by Ryūnosuke Akutagawa Fascinating stories that are very focused on the vagaries of human nature, but in a very down to earth way that sometimes pokes fun at more pretentious stories. 

9. Read the book that’s been on your TBR the longest. Sorcerer to the Crown by Zen Cho Fudged this one a little, it was actually #5 on my TBR, but all the ones before it were either doorstoppers, hard to get a hold of, or the beginning of massive series I didn’t feel like getting into. A solid fantasy, even if it didn't seem as revolutionary as I kept seeing reviews claim.

10. Read a political thriller by a marginalized author (BIPOC, or LGBTQIA+). While Justice Sleeps by Stacey Abrams I think some of the plot mechanics went over my head, but it was a fun ride.

11. Read a book with an asexual and/or aromantic main character. Beyond the Black Door by A.M. Strickland Interesting premise if a little too YA for my tastes.

12. Read an entire poetry collection. Gitanjali by Rabindranath Tagore Nothing super stuck out to me? Poetry doesn't a lot of the time, though.

13. Read an adventure story by a BIPOC author. Daughter of the Moon Goddess by Sue Lynn Tan This was an interesting take on the Moon Goddess story. I appreciated how much Xingyin drove the plot.

14. Read a book whose movie or TV adaptation you’ve seen (but haven’t read the book). The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle I can't believe how long it took me to read this book, having loved the movie forever. It has all the charm of the movie and then some.

15. Read a new-to-you literary magazine (print or digital). Uncanny Magazine Issue 37, edited by Lynne M. Thomas and Michael Damian Thomas, and Chimedum Ohaegbu and Elsa Sjunneson I loved a lot of the stories in this and the essays and interviews were interesting. I'll have to see if my library has more volumes!

16. Read a book recommended by a friend with different reading tastes. Base Notes by Lara Elena Donnelly Read this for book club, recommended by a friend who loves true crime. This is a thriller and is aggressively millennial. It's probably not fair that I kept comparing it to Perfume: Making of a Murderer, but Base Notes is so close in so many ways, without actually seeming to be aware of the fairly famous book?

17. Read a memoir written by someone who is trans or nonbinary. Gender Queer by Maia Kobabe A very personal exploration of gender in graphic novel form. Heads up for a few visuals of genitalia.

18. Read a “Best _ Writing of the year” book for a topic and year of your choice. The Best American Science Fiction and Fantasy 2022, edited by John Joseph Adams and Rebecca Roanhorse I loved so many of these stories and I have a few new authors to add to my tbr!

19. Read a horror novel by a BIPOC author. Nothing but Blackened Teeth by Cassandra Khaw Wonderfully creepy and atmospheric, but not sure I could actually follow the plot?

20. Read an award-winning book from the year you were born. Beauty by Sheri S. Tepper A series of fairy tales, with a very aware heroine because of the time travel. Content warnings for sexual assault, ableism, "humans are the parasite."

21. Read a queer retelling of a classic of the canon, fairytale, folklore, or myth. The Grimrose Girls by Laura Pohl Interesting, if not original, premise. Did not see the ending coming and I'll probably pick up the sequel at some point.

22. Read a history about a period you know little about. Fear on Trial by John Henry Faulk Mostly about the trial that ended Hollywood blacklisting during the Red Scare. I wish he had widened focus a little to talk more about his family and how his pursuing the suit affected them. Lots of trial transcripts and occasionally very witty.

23. Read a book by a disabled author. One for All by Lillie Lainoff A fun retelling of the Three Musketeers. I loved the really intentional choices of what to keep and what to change from the original book.

24. Pick a challenge from any of the previous years’ challenges to repeat! (2021/2019 - A historical fiction with POC or LGBTQ protagonist) A Marvellous Light by Freya Marske Loved this book! An interesting magic system and a neat look at where a fairly secret magic system brushes up against the mundane government. A sweet romance.

[sturmdunkel]

🧡❄️Yay! I'm so excited to get started on this it's really bad. Like I'm participating in another fandom event right now and I have to finish the fic for that first because the deadline for that is coming up soon…but mechanic!Andrew and android!Neil tho 😭

And to my shame I have to admit that I'm really, really bad at reading fanfic so not only don't I have any sci-fi au recommends but like. no recommends in general. I'm sorry. Do you have any recommendations for me tho? I can't promise I'll read them, but maybe there is hope for me yet.

(I have written some sci-fi aftg fic myself, but I'd feel weird passing off my self promo as a genuine rec, so I'll have to wait to tell you about that until December…)

I can probably recommend you some published sci-fi works tho. On the topic of robots/androids/ai I read a short story called "The Lifecycle of Software Objects" by Ted Chiang for a class on AI in literature once that I absolutely adored because the development and then treatment of these AIs just felt super realistic (it's in a collection called 'Exhalation' that i've been meaning to continue since but for some reason haven't). For the same class we read 'Klara and the Sun' by Kazuo Ishiguro which was also really good. Both of them are a little bittersweet tho. Then there's 'A Closed and Common Orbit' by Becky Chambers, who, if you've never read anything by her before, just writes really good spacefaring sci-fi. I adore her worldbuilding because it's so creative and detailed.

Also on the topic of robots: I only watched Studio Trigger's 'Promare' this year and absolutely fell in love so if you want some big robots and haven't seen that one yet I can only recommend that. The same with Evangelion. I'm *obsessed* with Evangelion.

I could probably scrounge up some more general sci-fi recs, but idk what you may or may not have read already. So let me return the question: do you have any recs for me? ❄️🧡

Ough same,,, I have to finish a comic for a fandom event but I'm really excited for it and also for this hehe >:DDD

Also don't worry!!! I think I'm on the opposite side of this spectrum,,,I think I've read most aftg fics on ao3 that are over 50k,,(this is foreshadowing) my favorite sci-fi work on ao3 is probably this monster of a fic called the wonders I've seen by gluupor and it's a farscape au!! Tho I've never actually played the game :")),,,,regarding other reccs I have,,,too many haha but nothing that's short :"

Aaaa thank you so much for the recommendations!!! I will go check out my local bookstore to see if they're in stock >:D I've been in a reading slump lately so I'm really excited to check them out!! I read Klara and the sun when it came out and I felt my brain expand reading it haha :)))

Also I really loved promare!!! I'm glad you enjoyed it!! :DDD studio trigger has such a wonderful animation style and I love their stuff >:) I'm also a really big fan of evangelion,,,,a kaworu figurine has been tempting me for a few months but it's like,,,200 ish euros oughh

On the topic of recommendations!! Have you read/ heard of the murderbot diaries? :O it's got a more satirical approach on the android but it's really wonderful and fun nonetheless!! I can't think of any more books at the moment however!!! If you liked evangelion have you considered watching Pacific Rim (directed by Guillermo del Toro the coolest guy ever) and studio trigger has some more fantastic sci-fi series like kill la kill, cyberpunk: edgerunners and star wars: visions! I also like tiger & bunny (recommended if you like a seemingly more lighthearted mecha pilot series) , gurren lagann is also a wonderful mecha series and one of my favorites BUT if you're to watch one I'd say you should watch Pluto, or read it!!! The mangaka is Naoki Urasawa who also made Monster and 20th Century Boys!! :DDD ah right and Trigun,,,,my timeless obsession :"

Also podcast wise if that's your thing,,,,wolf 359 is really really great, starts out as a comedy and ends up with you staring into space :P

Ok phew I'm so sorry,,,,,I love recommending stuff can you tell,,, :") either way!! I hope you have a wonderful day/ evening depending on your time zone!!! :DDD

[dankusner]

JFKjr + George + Coulter

Much has been written and said about John F. Kennedy, Jr., though not all of it by people who actually knew him.

In this new oral biography from RoseMarie Terenzio and Liz McNeil, JFK Jr.'s closest friends open up about who he was outside of the spotlight and what made him such a compelling figure that we're still besotted even 25 years after his untimely death.

The first oral biography of John F. Kennedy Jr. is an extraordinarily intimate, comprehensive look at the real man behind the myth.

Sharing never-before-told stories and insights, his closest friends, confidantes, lovers, classmates, teachers, and colleagues paint a vivid portrait of one of the most beloved figures of the 20th century, revealing how the boy who saluted became the man America came to know and love who still captures public imagination twenty-five years after his tragic death.

Born into the spotlight, John F. Kennedy Jr. lived a short but remarkable life filled with expectation, ambition, family pressures, love, and tragedy.

JFK Jr. dives deep into his complicated psyche and explores the what-ifs, illuminating both the cultural and political moment he inhabited and the way this son of a president, so full of promise and possibility, embodied America’s most cherished hopes.

ANN COULTER, CONTRIBUTOR  He loved bringing both sides of the aisle together. That was kind of the hallmark of George. Can you imagine what a different world it would be if anyone still cared about that? I have a surprising number of liberal friends, many of whom I met through George — all of whom have to deny me to their friends and still I am friends with them. At a lunch event early on, I had just been fired for the 18th time from MSNBC.

John thought it was the coolest thing ever.

“This is something you should put on your résumé. You’re like Howard Stern!”

He wanted to know everything I’d been fired for.

Loved it all.

I thought, “Yeah, this is the magazine for me.”

KELLYANNE CONWAY, POLLSTER FOR GEORGE 

He was fascinated with polling, because polling was the touchstone to what people think.

I remember telling John Kennedy that “I don’t know” is a great answer that often gets ignored.

He really enjoyed that part, “Let’s not push people.”

We did one poll asking, “Would you rather be president of the country or president of your own company?”

It wasn’t even close, they wanted to be president of their own company, because they don’t actually like politics, and it’d be less stressful and more lucrative.

That fascinated him and definitely informed his editorial choices.

CONWAY 

Two months before his death, there was a BMW event.

Laura Ingraham was there, too.

It was another example of bringing people together because it was the right versus the left, but we were in race cars and it was just fun.

He had his foot in a cast, so he couldn’t participate.

But he had fun.

He was always lovely, shy in a way, just trying to blend in and make everyone feel comfortable.

COULTER 

I think things in politics would be different if his plane hadn’t gone down. The polarization and hatred would have to be less because he set a standard. I mean, who knows? Trump still could have come along and wrecked everything, but even through Trump, life would have been better in politics, more interesting and more fun. Maybe there would be a President John.

JFK Jr.’s Final Days: Exclusive Excerpt from Revealing New Book JFK Jr.: An Intimate Oral Biography

Close friends share never-before-told stories about the life and tragic death of John F. Kennedy's only son, who died at age 38

JFK jr, john f kennedy jr cover

JFK Jr. in New York City in 1996 and the JFK Jr. PEOPLE cover .

Close friends share never-before-told stories about the life and tragic death of John F. Kennedy's only son, who died at age 38

On Nov. 25, 1963, three-year-old John F. Kennedy Jr. saluted his assassinated father’s casket in a televised funeral procession.

That heartbreaking image came to symbolize the nation's loss.

The world never stopped watching as the little boy grew into a movie-star-handsome magazine editor, married Carolyn Bessette and then died at age 38 on July 16, 1999, when the plane he was piloting crashed off Martha’s Vineyard, also killing Carolyn, 33, and her sister Lauren, 34.

For more on JFK Jr., pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands Friday, or subscribe here.

Now, 25 years after JFK Jr.’s death, many of his closest friends have opened up about the man behind the myth in JFK Jr: An Intimate Oral Biography by RoseMarie Terenzio and People editor-at-large Liz McNeil, excerpted exclusively — in print and audio — below.

Before her husband’s funeral, Mrs. Kennedy asked military personnel to teach John how to salute his casket.

Philip M. Hannan, auxiliary bishop of the Archdiocese of Washington

"I saw John Jr. salute [that day]. I was standing by him. I thought, This is the picture that will live.

I saw the reaction of the people across the street. It was an instantaneous reaction; they broke down, especially the women … I had heard Mrs. Kennedy say, 'John, salute.' I knew then that this was probably the most poignant picture of the century."

John grew up in New York City, where his mom moved with him and Caroline in 1964. She enrolled him at the private Collegiate School.

David Clarke, schoolmate

"He had this big mop of hair. You’d see him wandering around the halls, shirttails hanging out, his tie ripped off to one side, his hair a mess. He was known for losing blazers."

He transferred to elite Andover in 1976 and had to repeat his senior year when he failed math before starting at Brown University in 1979. He was easily distractable but his name and charm brought advantages — and fun.

William Cohan, schoolmate

"One weekend, he invites me down to [the family’s apartment at] 1040 Fifth Avenue. I walk in and it’s mind-boggling. And his mother’s there. And then John goes into his room and decides he wants to get high, takes out the bong, smokes a bowl, pours the bong water out onto Fifth Avenue from his bathroom."

Gary Ginsberg, college friend

"I met John in the second-to-last row of a history class. One day … neither of us had any clue what was really going on. John had to give an answer, and it was so inane. But after he finished his two-minute response, the professor’s nodding vigorously. 'John, that was so insightful.' That’s when I realized it was what John always referred to as 'the JK Factor.'

"There’s no table in a restaurant? Then one appears. He’d always look at me with that sh---eating grin and go, 'JK Factor.' "

John F. Kennedy Jr. photographed at George Magazine Headquarters in New York City in 1996

John F. Kennedy Jr. photographed at 'George Magazine' Headquarters in New York City in 1996.

Anne Marie Fox

He got his law degree from NYU in 1989 and passed the bar exam on his third try. He dated actress Daryl Hannah off and on but met and fell for Calvin Klein publicist Carolyn Bessette in 1992 before formally ending things with Hannah.

Robbie Littell, best friend

"[Carolyn] intrigued him more than anyone he’d ever met. A force of nature. He said he wanted to marry her. He was adamant."

They wed on Sept 21, 1996 on Cumberland Island, off the coast of Georgia.

George Kyriakos, wedding guest and Carolyn’s hairdresser

"John slept in my then-wife Jackie’s and my room the night before the wedding. Which is crazy — there was this huge mansion where everybody had rooms, and John was sleeping on a cot in our room. It was the whole don’t-sleep-with-the-bride-the-night-before-the-wedding thing."

Gogo Ferguson, who hosted their wedding

"We lit the church with all the candles and flashlights we had because by the time we got her in her dress and I drove her down the road in my truck, it was getting dark. There was no electricity. John and Carolyn stayed at our house that night. Someone had the great idea of putting rose petals all the way up our driveway and into our bedroom, which ended up a complete mess. That was gonna be the honeymoon suite."

The press attention intensified — and while John was used to it, Carolyn was overwhelmed.

John F. Kennedy, Jr. and his wife Carolyn Bessette Kennedy arrive at the annual John F. Kennedy Library Foundation dinner and Profiles in Courage awards in honor of the former President's 82nd Birthday, Sunday, May 23, 1999 at the Kennedy Library in Boston, MA. John F. Kennedy, Jr. and his wife Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy at the annual Profiles in Courage awards on May 23, 1999 at the Kennedy Library in Boston, Mass. Justin Ide Sasha Chermayeff, college friend

"She genuinely felt she was in danger. The paranoia set in when she kind of let her mind spin off: 'What if somebody wants to kidnap me?' After they got married, it just escalated and escalated and escalated. John was five years older. And being followed, it’s very different for a 200-lb. man than for a woman alone. By then she was thinking, 'They’re spying on me. They’re stalking me. Now my life is being afraid.' "

John got his pilot’s license in 1998 and found an escape in the skies.

Robbie Littell

"That was some of the happiest times he ever had. Floating around with the buzzards in his Buckeye [plane]. It was the freedom. But most of all, it was getting away. Flying made him super happy. Free spirit, in control, doing something, you know … a James Bondian endeavor. Playing James Bond."

Gary Ginsberg

"He said, 'It’s the only place I can go where no one is bothering me. I have complete silence, and no one can get to me except the air traffic controllers.' Maybe that gives you insight into what he was really dealing with on the ground."

RoseMarie Terenzio, friend and assistant

"When he got his plane, the Cessna, you have to have a tail number, and he wanted 529 because that was his dad’s birthday — May 29. When he went to reserve that number to register it with the FAA, that one was taken. He ended up buying the number from the person who had it. The tail number on both of John’s planes was N529JK."

John was trying to keep George magazine afloat, fighting with Carolyn and worried about the looming death from cancer of his cousin Anthony Radziwill. In May 1999, he broke his ankle paragliding. John and Carolyn’s relationship hit a low point the week of July 12. Though accounts vary, John spent at least one night at the Stanhope Hotel.

Sasha Chermayeff

"They were spiting each other. Maybe Carolyn was trying to make him worry [by not coming home]. So then he did it the next night. He was not with her those last two nights. The Stanhope thing was tricky. I think he went there to meet [former girlfriend] Julie Baker. Everybody always asks me, 'What do I think would’ve happened?' Anything was possible."

Julie Baker

"I spoke to John for the last time the night before he passed. There is a rumor going around that I was with him at the Stanhope [that night]. This is not true. He was at a baseball game and wanted me to meet up with him and his friend after to grab a drink. I was away, so I couldn’t. I did however grab a quick lunch with him (which we often did) at the Stanhope a few days before the accident."

On July 16, he spent the day at the office. The plan was to fly to Martha’s Vineyard to drop off Carolyn’s sister Lauren, 34, and then fly to Hyannis, Mass., for his cousin Rory Kennedy’s wedding. But they ended up leaving later than planned.

RoseMarie Terenzio

"I got to John and Carolyn’s apartment, where I was staying until my air conditioning got fixed, at 9:30 or 10:00. They had two phones — one in the kitchen, and then a fax machine. Only three or four people had that number. I picked up the fax phone and it was Carole [Radziwill, Anthony’s wife]. She said, 'Oh thank God you’re there.' I said, 'Carole? It’s Rose.' She said, 'Where are they? They didn’t land in the Vineyard.' No one knew where John was. [RoseMarie spoke to John’s flight instructor Bob Marena.] He said the flight took off at 8:39. That’s when I panicked.

"Then Ann Freeman, Carolyn and Lauren’s mom, called . . . She was panic-stricken. She said something like, 'I told him never to take two of my girls up at the same time.' She was angry. Crying. It was panic, shock. Disbelief."

The National Transportation Safety Board determined the cause of the accident as the “pilot’s failure to maintain control of the airplane, which was a result of spatial disorientation. Factors in the accident were haze and the dark night."

Jeff Guzzetti, NTSB investigator, Office of Aviation Safety

"His flight path into the water is consistent with what is known as a graveyard spiral. The airplane makes a spiral nose-down . . . kind of like going down a drain. The plane went into one final turn and it stayed in that turn pretty much all the way down to the ocean. He went in seven miles from Martha’s Vineyard.

"I don’t think the passengers knew what was happening to them. They might’ve felt a little G-force pushing them down in their seats, like, 'This feels a little bit weird.' You would’ve heard the rush of air over the fuselage accelerate or get louder, during the final fatal plunge. Perhaps feel yourself accelerating a little bit. And then they hit the surface of the water and it’s over. Now, the pilot is different. I would expect that the pilot would be very confused and perhaps a little frightened because the instruments may have not been matching up with how he was feeling. The impact forces were tremendous."

RoseMarie Terenzio

"A week later, I got a big brown box from the mail room. I think it was from the NTSB. There was his wallet. It was all water-damaged and warped. And one crutch. I sent it to [John’s sister] Caroline [Kennedy]. I just cried."

On July 22, the USS Briscoe brought members of the Kennedy and Bessette families to scatter the ashes for a burial at sea.

Barry C. Black, Navy chaplain

"Caroline clutched the urn . . . I calmed her, and we went down. Contorted with grief is not even an adequate description. She put the ashes in. As the ashes were pouring, she reached her hand into the water to put some water back on her [as if she thought], 'I’m not going to let go of his hand.' They dropped flowers as the ship was sailing. They embraced one another as if that human closeness would somehow mitigate the ache.

Robbie Littell

"I’ve heard they cut a tree down in Irish culture when someone dies young because they only lived half of their life. And I like to say, here’s a guy who lived twice as hard as anyone else. Twice as well as anyone else . . . I think of the loss, not so much my loss, but his loss — of not being able to experience life which he loved so much. The loss was going to come when the stories faded — and I didn’t want to lose the stories."

BOOKS Through the eyes of those who knew him best

Into the ruthless world of Kennedy family biographies enters JFK Jr.: An Intimate Oral Biography , co-written by RoseMarie Terenzio — John Kennedy Jr.’s executive assistant and a close confidante of his wife, Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy — and People magazine editor-at-large Liz McNeil.

JFK Jr. is timed to the 25th anniversary of the still-unthinkable deaths of the couple, and Bessette’s sister Lauren, in the crash of a plane piloted by Kennedy on a foggy night off the coast of Martha’s Vineyard on July 16, 1999.

The oral history offers extensive reminiscences from a friendly chorus of prep school classmates, colleagues, close friends, housemates, historians, multiple girlfriends and one National Park Service ranger who declined Kennedy’s request to rappel off the top of Mt. Rushmore to promote a book associated with his magazine, George.

Pamela Anderson shows up to remember Kennedy fondly, as do Garth Brooks, Brooke Shields, Jeffrey Sachs and Sinn Fein leader Gerry Adams.

Sprawling and fascinating, JFK Jr. was clearly written by and populated with people who love him.

Terenzio’s closeness to the couple was virtually unrivaled.

She was staying at their Tribeca apartment the weekend of their deaths;

she was the one everybody called in a panic, the one who called Ted Kennedy’s house to tell him his nephew’s plane was missing, the one who boxed up the couple’s effects.

The extent of her access to Kennedy’s inner circle, and the frankness of their recollections, are remarkable.

In the first years after Kennedy’s death, few of his famously protective friends spoke to the press, and then it seemed as if they all did, all at once, producing a firehose of memoirs and documentaries.

Terenzio herself has previously done both.

The book benefits from its distance from that gold rush, since Kennedy’s friends no longer need to jealously guard their recollections.

It suffers as well, since so few mysteries remain.

While JFK Jr. almost certainly provides the fullest portrait of Kennedy ever written, stacked with gratifyingly gossipy details, it offers few actual scoops.

Wisely, it doesn’t linger on the well-tilled Camelot years, or on Jack and Jackie Kennedy’s famously fraught relationship.

“I’m not so sure he didn’t love her at the end,” says one of Jackie’s confidants, with a notable lack of enthusiasm.

The image of John-John (a name he came to hate) saluting his father’s casket came to symbolize the nation’s grief.

It was his third birthday, and he had practiced the salute with his Secret Service detail.

After that, John F. Kennedy, Jr. belonged to everybody.

Jackie, portrayed here as doting but strict, eventually moved her children to Manhattan, hoping to give them regular lives.

Classmates remember Kennedy as a mostly normal kid, albeit one who took his friends dancing at Studio 54 and refused to discuss the Warren Commission.

“He had a bit of sadness to him,” recalls one of Kennedy’s teachers.

“He was a more complicated person than people think.”

Friends describe him as scattered — always late, always losing things, including cars and bicycles — and an indifferent student whose admission to Brown surprised everyone.

He would later fail the bar exam twice.

“We never thought he’d be very smart,” admits Secret Service agent Clint Hill.

When Kennedy was 27, People magazine named him the Sexiest Man Alive, something that seemed to both embarrass and secretly thrill him.

“He knew he was beautiful,” recalls a gossip columnist who knew him.

“He spent hours and hours at the gym. I never saw him take a shower with the curtain closed.”

Kennedy developed an alarming taste for adventure that resulted in several near-death experiences;

he once wandered off-trail and got lost in the African jungle.

He had been fascinated with flying since his days riding with his father in the presidential helicopter.

In the air, he was free from the earthbound pressures that came with being a Kennedy, his friend William Cohan says.

“He did do a lot of crazy things, but I don’t think he had a death wish. I think he thought he was invincible, which is pretty crazy given his father and uncle were assassinated.”

Under Terenzio and McNeil’s skillful navigation, a portrait of Kennedy emerges:

He was a loyal friend, unpretentious and effortlessly likable, skilled at putting normies at ease with his ridiculous fame.

He was always the biggest celebrity in any room, and never knew anything else.

Regular New Yorkers would stop him on the street to tell him what his father meant to them (he usually loved this).

Women, even supermodels, would swoon, sometimes literally.

But when he met and married Calvin Klein executive Carolyn Bessette, the spotlight became unbearable, at least for her.

Kennedy’s friends speak of Bessette with what seems like a mixture of fondness, trepidation and resentment.

They recall her electric personality, her alternating tendencies toward hostility and warmth, her maternal instincts.

The more they describe her, the more unknowable she seems.

(Despite rumors to the contrary, Terenzio says she never saw Bessette-Kennedy use drugs, though her husband was a daily pot smoker.)

She was hunted by paparazzi who would hurl insults to get a reaction, once sending her fleeing into traffic.

Toward the end, she became reluctant to leave their apartment.

She seemed to be unraveling.

Kennedy, who shared his family’s famous determination to get on with things, was mostly unsympathetic.

It didn’t help that the photographers who tormented Bessette-Kennedy would pretend to be kind to her when he was around.

“He could have done more to help her,” one friend observes. “He was brilliant in the deep end, so he thought Carolyn could do the same.” If there’s one surprising thing JFK Jr. reveals, it’s how much the tabloids were right: about the tension between the couple in their last days, their likely extramarital dalliances, and the fact that Carolyn, unenthused at the prospect of putting on a brave face at Rory Kennedy’s wedding that terrible weekend, almost didn’t go.

On the day of the crash, Kennedy, according to one friend, was “fighting to turn around his life.”

His marriage was crumbling, his best friend and cousin Anthony Radziwill was dying, and he was estranged from his beloved sister, Caroline.

Neither sibling liked the other’s spouse, and Caroline, who did not speak for the book, is portrayed as frosty and distant throughout.

According to those who knew him, Kennedy was beginning to cautiously embrace his political destiny.

The night before the crash, he told a friend he wanted to challenge New York Gov. George Pataki, the first stop on a likely inexorable road to the White House.

It had always been both obvious and necessary that he would pick up the mantle of the Kennedy family — he was their last charismatic member.

At the time of his death, he was still struggling to figure out his own way there.

“He wanted to be his own person,” recalls boxer Mike Tyson, a friend of Kennedy’s. “But how do you become your own person … when you almost belong to everybody?”

[yuseonghqs]

would it be possible to get some prompts or ideas for the writing sample to strike some inspiration? thanks! xx

hi there! here are some ideas for the application free form area:

ic muse diaries, a list of items that are significant somehow, grocery lists/other sorts of to do lists (provided you add some context to these), letters/notes from your muse to someone else (either a family member or some sort of professional letters) or from someone else to your muse, if it works better that way. a short biography, either written out fully or within bullet points, a timeline of your muse's life/significant milestones, etc.

your muse is moving house/apartment and finds significant items from their past that they had some how forgotten or cleaning out a room/box of discarded items from their childhood or a family member.

your muse's first experience in yuseong versus how they fit in to the town now. why are they in yuseong? do they feel stuck? are they hiding from something?

your muse is being interviewed about a local yuseong bay event and is prompted to give some insight to the town and how they view the area, ie. how did you come to be in yuseong? are you a resident or a visitor? what do you think about the hanhwa resort opening and buying property on the shoreline? are you afraid of tourism changing what you know and love about yuseong? or do you think that the boost to the local economy is a good thing?

your muse participating in or witnessing some of the local yuseong lore, ie. walking through the forest and getting lost, experiencing one or more paranormal hotspots around the area, feeding the many cats that seem to thrive in a massive unchecked colony, watching the meteor shower or carving something under the wooden bridge, maybe even searching for the lost time capsule.

feel free to use any of these ideas or a variation of them in your application! you really could write anything in the application freeform that is significant to your muse, as long as it provides some context and allows us admins to have a clear picture of the character you are bringing!