#or maybe I just suck lol
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Dang. Not even Lumiere can beat the challenge difficulty mode
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Y'all....
Remind me to go to the beach later. Need some pearls for alchemy
#skyrim#im TRYING to do a mage build#but it's SO DIFFICULT before you level up your spells... like how tf do you advance without needing a backup melee weapon?#ive FINALLY just now been able to trow exploding magics at enemies! it took HOURS#the game looks to be heavily geared towards stealth archers and heavy weapon people#or maybe I just suck lol#i havent played since 2023 so like....#there's a save that I will never touch again bc of...... reasons that make me very uncomfortable#i mean shit... took me long enough to be comfortable playing video games in general again#i almost abandoned Project Diva... trauma just be like that I suppose#picking up something from around the event makes you FEEL bad feelings#i love skyrim
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learning that self deprecation isnt cool and just makes the people around you uncomfortable unironically improved my mental health a lot. like if you just stop saying negative shit about yourself you will genuinely like yourself more and other people wont be repulsed by your attitude and you will have more friends. it's true.
#people will fr go ''god im such an ugly loser LOL i suck at everything i do and i should just kms“#and then go “why does no one want to be around me”#maybe because your attitude sucks. maybe because i said 'those mean things you say about yourself arent true'#and you spent five minutes arguing with me about how im wrong.#00
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What if James was always onimously soaked through as a nod to his ending
#Had to get the idea our but both these drawings SUCK I'm so sorry lol#I just wish his face wasn't so fucking hard for me to draw. Why is it every character I love I can't draw#Anyway like with Eddie being cold and Angela with her fire. I like to think James looks wet. Maybe not to himself but to others#How they truly see him is the wreck he is and always wet from rain or puddles or all the water he wades through in his version of sh#I just love how tied to water he is#Silent hill 2#Silent hill 2 remake#Silent hill#James Sunderland#fan art#art#sketch#character art#horror
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Stan and Ford watching the northern lights
#this was just a little landscape practice#and halfway through drawing it i've decided to add the stan o'war II (and stan and ford) because why not lol#(i also quickly realized that i suck at drawing boats lmao)#i actually didn't intend to post this but eh maybe someone likes it#(and yeah the stan o'war isn't really accurate but it wasn't my priority here so *shrugs*)#gravity falls#stan pines#stanford pines#digital art#my stuff
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#ace attorney#gyakuten saiban#phoenix wright#naruhodou ryuuichi#mia fey#ayasato chihiro#phoenix is definitely the type to doodle on his notes#maybe i'm just projecting#maybe i should post the doodles on my notes here lol#art#digital art#aa#miles edgeworth#mitsurugi reiji#narumitsu#????#technically a bit ? idk man#i googled “law notes” and transcribed a bit lol#exept the rules of presenting evidence those are from the rise from the ashes court records :p#edit: added descriptions#they suck and i'm sorry
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wyllstarion chronicles
i ran out of wholesome wyllstarion ideas so i decided to shitpost because i physically cant stop drawing them (this is a cry for help ples give me drawing suggestions thank u)
#i tolf myself i'd draw a solo wyll illustration#but that meant i'd need to render fully and shit#no thanks heart eyes emoji#i need to suck it up and RENDER for once#maybe i can compromise on just posting a sketch 😭#last pic was partially inspired by that new fic asidian posted#becaus i wanted to draw wyll whump based on the fic#but i realized the pose i had in mind was beyond my capabilities#so i had to draw something silly instead#bg3#wyllstarion#bloodblade#bloodpact#wyll ravengard#astarion#wyll x astarion#farts n sharts#<art tag lol#scrib time
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Hm... the idea of the ghosts of Uchiha continuing to endure beside the mourner who grieves them, even beyond death... Idk, it compels me.
#Or something like that anyways lol. It's fun to draw ig. So... I think I was going for:#Izuna guiding a near-blind Madara to take his eyes and -#- Mikoto wishing she could unburden her youngest son of the unimaginable weight that has been placed on his shoulders.#Something like that.#Sasuke Uchiha#Madara Uchiha#Izuna Uchiha#Mikoto Uchiha#Uchiha Clan#Naruto#naruto fanart#Really this is a combo of me wanting some expression practice and - maybe you guessed it - more insomnia lol.#Also I'm seeing so many mistakes but I AM going to try to go to sleep... got sucked into so many meetings today and am tired but my body -#- will not cooperate rip. But maybe I'll fix tomm.#Also if you sent asks I have them in progress - I just need to edit and pull a few more manga panels.#Btw it was CRIMINAL that we didn't get Mikoto/Fugaku or Izuna edo tensei... but I guess that would have humanized the Uchiha too much -#- and Kishi wasn't about that anymore lol... he had a genocide to justify lol.
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Little bright colored outfit with a fun vest ~
(shoes from ebay like 10 years ago. everything else is thrifted)
#ootd#jfashion#fashion#fantasy fashion#mori kei#....like... adjacent... lol#no idea what style this would be lol.. makes me think of like whimsical vaguely fantasy themed childrens book character#finally posting one of my aforementioned seven million drafts of actual outfits and costumes i have finished and edited#the photos for but just never feel like posting lol..#I need to find one of those people whos like 'omg i am ADDICTED to social media ugh i wish i could get off of it#im just browsing and posting like 60 times a daaaaay!!!' and take a little magical bottle and suck some of the social media#enthusiasim out of them. for moi. In exchange they can have some of my 'literally just never in the mood to post or interact with the#outside world ever' energy. We can balance each other. huzzah and so on#Though I think maybe it's part of the general thing I've heard of like.. I can't remember if it was in reference to adhd or just some sort#of general execcutive functioning issue type of thing - but the idea that things have to be ''just right'' before you do something. like#'oh i need to do this task. but i have to wait until XYZ first' or 'oh i can do this but only if X specific condition is met' or etc#The fact that I even have to be in a Specific Mindset to post. or sometimes will delay posting on social media because like 'oh well#I'm going somewhere tomorrow. somehow this matters. i cannot spend 5 minuts posting TONIGHT. clearly it will interfere#somehow schedule wise with the doctor appointment i have 15 hours from now. yes. yes. i must wait until my appointment is over#tomorrow afternoon. THEN i shall post' or etc. etc. lol. NOT even taking into account the many days#I just genuinely and physically sick and it's not even a mental thing. I just physically dont feel like sitting at the computer lol..#ANYWAY.. trying to get back into it. trying to get a business bank account.. make a proper paypal so i can start selling sculptures again.#selling clothes and sculptures.. posting about such things then of course as one must. etc... chanting to hype up and motivate myself lol#But yes. this is my favorite outfit out of the bunch so I am posting it first I guess.. maybe others later..#Also the purple dress says its from shein. which I've heard is bad fast fashion stuff. but maybe okay since its second hand? I havent#been to the bins since like 2020 or late 2019 even. and I think stuff like shein and temu has only become poular in the past few years#but I bet if I went to the bins now I might would find a good handfull of that stuff. Probably now not much different than what you#find in a walmart or a forever 21 or actual physical stores you can go to though. I hear quality of clothing is down everywhere no matter#where you get it or whatnot. What bountiful joys unfettered capitalism and exploitation bestows upon us (<being sarcastic).#Wearing one of my favorite little vests though. I love the texture of it and the clasps on it
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i unfortunately have a disease and it’s called Can’t Stop Drawing Duck Team.
(inspo for callie’s tulip bantu knots from here!)
#naddpod#not another dnd podcast#calliope petrichor#sol bufo#solum bufo#calder kilde#mostly i had the idea of flowery spring eladrin callie w bantu knots and also aviator jacket calder#and i simply couldn’t leave sol out. so here’s everyone Again#and also i hadn’t actually drawn callie fat yet. a crime that had to be corrected#gonna maybe try to do this for all the arcs as i do my relisten! calder literally Just got sucked into the helm#so i guess i’ll have to learn how to draw hardwon lmao. or maybe i’ll draw kenna in his place instead lol#sorry i’ve never drawn foster i don’t want to draw an actual duck#oh god i’m probably gonna have to draw the serpents too eventually
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with the amount that the main series dunks on the forbidden cities i would just love for unraveled to be just an unabashed celebration of humanity. like yes there is poverty and pollution and crime but also there is dancing and music and rollercoasters and scary movies. let keefe discover the beauty here! the first book was all about the wonder of the lost cities but unraveled could be all about the wonder of the forbidden cities
#i just have such a hard time with how much the series dunks on humans#which understandably so#but i just want unraveled to enjoy the forbidden cities#like if i have to read a book of keefe just being like “this food is garbage and the air smells bad and it sucks”#it would get really tired#i think there is an inherent life to humanity that the lost cities lack#there is no drive to live excitingly when you live forever because you don't have to squeeze as much as you can in#let keefe get a taste of that!!!!#its something that would SO lend itself to his character#as someone who was chronically punished as a child for being too much#LET HIM BE MUCH WITH HUMANITY#maybe all these tags should be in the post but eh#this is where i prefer to cook lol#kotlc#kotlc unraveled
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Does anyone else hc that Nightmare can like, absorb his tentacles back into his body sometimes? Like the way Stitch does with his extra arms?
#UTDR#UTMV#Nightmare Sans#I just realised earlier I've been just kinda assuming this as fact and I don't know where it came from#cause I don't think it's canon and I can't think of seeing it anywhere else#So maybe it's just me idk#Anyway it's something I wanted to be more prevalent when I was doing the truce au comic (which if I ever work on again I'll probably restar#cause I didn't really know what I was doing and there's stuff I wanna amend)#But the idea was that at the start of their attempted truce the tentacles made Dream uncomfortable#(Not only because Nightmare often used them against him in battle but also it's something different about his brother from his#childhood memories and it was jarring to see his one constant be changed)#He didn't say anything about it but obviously Nightmare could feel it#So whenever Dream was around I would make a point of drawing him with the tentacles sucked in#It was his little unspoken effort to make the truce work. because he wanted it very badly but would rather die than admit it#(or try to figure out why)#But over the course of the truce Dream would notice and start encouraging him to have them out and be himself#Showing Nightmare a little acceptence because despite the differences that's still his brother#You ever write six times more in the tags than the actual post lol#These are the DVD extras of the post you have to go looking for these#Director's commentary of my silly little thoughts :3#Anyway thoughts?
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the thing that's vital to understand about cccc is that they have reasons for what they do. but also, and this is important, they all kinda suck
mind is doing what he believes is best for them. he wants to be the perfect solution to every problem. he's also arrogant and incredibly petty, gloating and bitching every chance he gets about how much better he is than heart. he pretends his own feelings are just logical conclusions, while also devaluing other people's feelings. he sucks!
heart was never listened to by mind. he knows he's "weak and vile" but believes (rightfully!) that emotions are needed to survive. he also literally shot someone, refuses to admit that literally shooting someone is bad, and stubbornly both complains he's not listened to and never listens to anyone else. he sucks!
soul is exhausted. he's gone through this countless times, enduring the same arguments over and over. he just wants it to stop. so, he exerts as much power as he can over the two of them and threatens their lives. he's simultaneously both the most in control (of the three) and powerless (in the narrative), and he tries to control the other two for his own ends (even if those ends are ultimately good for them all). he sucks!
the story of cccc is ultimately about guys who kinda fucking sucks for their own reasons. the story is about the raw, unsanitized experience of mental illness. of course they're all deeply fucked up! removing their flaws is just re-sanitizing the purposeful mess that is the album and its characters
#i don't personally have a Hot Take on like... the whole aspect of people creating gory content for cccc#because at the end of the day. it's a story about messy mental health. that mess looks different for everyone#and maybe that work is an expression of the creator's mess. or maybe it's just for fun#i try to strike a balance between these and obviously i'm biased {lol} but for serious stuff it's vital you know#they all very much suck. and thats ok#cccc#chonny jash#chonnys charming chaos compendium#cj heart#cj mind#cj soul#cccc analysis#i guess#tridential tirade
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with my move around the corner and life feeling sort of real again, i'm having Regular Thoughts about hobbies i've been meaning to revisit...
#i didnt realize just how close i was to finishing my suit until i started packing up my supplies#i really did just let the joy get sucked out of me in this place#aahh... so SO excited to LIVE again. ill have hobbies! a consistent work schedule! maybe even treat myself better!#actually. absolutely will treat myself better. and a fursuit? that'd fix me better than therapy tbh#waves my hands around#ee#my art#furry#fursona#fursuit#oc: cow#the cow fursuit timeline#<--this tag will be used again! yay!!#augh#little known hyperfixation is fursuiting btw#i like to watch fursuit parades while drawing sometimes. or like. whole eating lol#and i can name most makers as it goes on#i love fursuits i love crafts
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if i just told you i love you would this world change
#witch hat tag#orufrey#these kinda suck lol i feel like i cant draw right now *irritated sigh* BUT I FEEL EMOTIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#if you are gay go watch good omens season 2 right now. NO YOU DONT KNOW THO!!!!!!!!!#i know being this affected by good omens is probably cringe. I dont care any more. the last 1 minute of good omens season 2 was#some of the most affecting acting i've ever seen in my life. sometimes someone acts with the force as if their entire career led to that#like during the credits part the very end im not even talking about before that. holy god#aziraphale i know everything about you. i know what you are feeling right now. i can see everything on your face. we're going to make it#ER.... NOT THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS POST. IT'S NOT SPOILERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!#I JUST FEEL THOROUGHLY CHANGED !!!!!!!!!!! SHIT GETS REAL FROM NOW ON.. LIKE IN GENERAL! IN MY LIFE!#tormented gay love tormented gay love TORMENTED GAY LOVE TORMENTED GAY LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#btw the first 3 images were drawn earlier with an entirely different feeling and an entirely different mood.#Why do you keep pulling away from me?#It is because i love you that i do this#the lyrics from one of my japanese orufrey songs (A SONG THAT THE CREATOR LISTENS TO!!!!) led to feelings#“あなたが���らない私を残さず見ててほしいの” but i'm not translating it cause it just sounds weird. if with his eyes oru's asking “WHY don't you want#to let me in? to see all of you?“ those lyrics are like ”I actually want you to see every last bit of the parts of me you don't know“#oru you have no idea how much i want to lay bare my whole soul for you#maybe it's an alternate version of chapter 40. to me#i need to draw something really fucking good or i'm not going to forgive myself. i will not rest in this life#until i have made the orufrey that fully satisfies me nor until i have seen what the manga is leading to#NO STORY MEANS ANYTHING WITHOUT TORMENTED GAY LOVE AT THE HEART OF IT. THATS THE HEART OF THIS WORLD!!!!!#........... so Hi im normal :) haha *goes and finally makes breakfast*
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seems to me like zac oyama is repping some experiences of asian american schoolkids, defined by such hits like 'regulate your anger,' 'communicate clearer to deliberately misunderstanding assholes,' and 'perpetual sense of unbelonging in both the american part and the asian part of your life.'
#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy#zac oyama#gorgug thistlespring#great stuff! I can't watch that shit for entertainment#the asian american strugglebus... feeling like an alien hahahahahahahahahahahahahaahha#this is just surface level personal experience ofc like maybe I had a very specific version of childhood#oh yeah did i mention the Designated Role you get in school lol that's fun for literally nobody who ever attended school schools suck#but education is good! try not to drop out or at least get geds they help college is a good thing check out crash course on youtube#panic rambling in the tags tonite#my thoughts#talking about my asian-ness makes me so nervous my westernized brain is yelling 'shut up! shut up!'#I enjoy gorgug being rage-ful as a treat#asian things
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