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#or live in my town anymore
unhingedlesbear · 23 days
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Just contemplated the fact that I have one (1) friend irl
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care666bear · 3 months
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pics from last year living on an island with less than 100,000 people = very little light pollution.
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neurotypical-sonic · 1 year
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yes two days ago I was harping on about how small rural towns fucking suck, I still stand by that, but. small town festivals did hit different. and yes I still dont think that sonic wachowski would actually interact with the town or be able to exist publicly. thinking about local festivals and carl and scuttling under tables and stalls
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Dunmeshi themes of consumption on the brain
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0x4468c7a6a728 · 4 months
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saturnniidae · 4 months
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I miss being younger and believing the queer community was actually a safe space
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willowfey · 1 year
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starting to think maybe waking up with an anxiety stomachache every single morning and then needing to spend the entire day trying to get rid of said anxiety just to maybe have a few minutes in the evening of feeling relaxed before going to bed is perhaps not normal
#the first thing i do when i become conscious is check my phone to make sure nothing terrible happened to anyone i love while i slept#i never ever ever have plans and if anyone Else has plans i feel sick with anxiety until they’re back from them#if i have smth planned that week i feel completely tense and on edge until it happens#i didn’t used to be like this i hate hate hate it#i used to feel safe in my little house in the forest where i knew everyone in town and knew my way around with my eyes shut#it’s still the only place in the world i feel safe. that’s so unfair#my separation anxiety is ridiculous. if my mom goes to the store and doesn’t answer a text right away i start panicking#if my sister goes to a class or smth idk what to do with myself until she gets back#if i’m in the shower or have the fan on or headphones in suddenly i’ll think i hear someone shouting and i’ll have to quickly turn it off#ever since i moved here it’s been getting worse. i don’t feel safe here to begin with i feel so out of place it’s unreal#but then covid and trauma with my mother’s health and my uncle dying and multiple relatives getting sick and things happening to my friends#i know i have ptsd from very specific things that happened and i live on a hospital path so every day i hear sirens#and every time i do it fully triggers an anxiety attack in me for at least an hour. and my mom too#since being here my hometown burned and friends i thought would never grow apart did and my brother moved out#i know a lot of that is just Being In Your Low Twenties but also some of my worst trauma has happened in the last handful of years and now#now i’m just always scared. always uneasy. always worried. never fully relaxed. never feel fully safe. & idk how to be myself through that#i’m always paranoid and i never trust people irl anymore. ppl my mom or sister meet. i am so suspicious of them constantly.#if anything small changes at all i can’t handle it. my ability to deal with change has gone so downhill#in the last 5 years of being here i realised i was autistic which led to me unmasking a bit and that. comes with pros & cons doesn’t it#my own health has declined. my body changed a lot in ways i wasn’t prepared for and i had to get rid of most of my comfort clothes#sometimes i just wanna sit on the ground and cry about it and not have to also be the one that picks myself back up. y’know???#but at the very least i’d love to just wake up One Day w/o feeling sick with anxiety already. just one day i want to wake up feeling rested#i want to be myself again but can i start with not being scared? not being tired? i don’t know what to do anymore#i just watch my comfort videos and read my comfort fics and stay in my daydream world
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wheelie-sick · 2 months
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someone on the desert post: I'm from [my hometown]
someone else on the desert post: OP are you from [my hometown]
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[ID: someone cowering while they are threatened with a broom]
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It's been a while since the initial announcement, but any thoughts about Life is Strange: Double Exposure?
I watched the trailer and y'know what? I'm intrigued. I actually look forward to playing it. I looks nice, the murder mystery and parallel timelines concept sounds interesting, and I want to see what Max is like after all this time. How's she coping with and healing from all the trauma she went through in the first game?
I haven't watched anything other than the trailer and I'm not keeping tabs on any updates or anything, though. I know that Chloe's not in the trailer and a lot of people are upset about that but like... I'm not mad, haha. Listen, I have a complicated relationship with Chloe Price as a character and I'm not a pricefield shipper by any means, so if this game takes place in the timeline where Chloe died then I won't be too upset.
If anything, I think this game taking place in that timeline would be way more compelling, especially since this story seems to be about Max attempting to prevent the death of yet another friend of hers. She said she swore to never use her powers again, too. I think it'd make sense for her to say that in either timeline, but more so in this one.
However, I know a lot of people would be pissed so it makes me wonder just what they're doing here. It's difficult to take both endings into account unless they do something where if Chloe's alive, she's just not present. Maybe she and Max talk on the phone or Max makes references to where she is... but that would feel cheap, no? Especially to fans who love the original game for the Chloe and Max dynamic, platonic or romantic, and would want to see it now that they're both older and away from Arcadia Bay. I mean, how are they handling themselves after the tornado destroyed everything?
Maybe Chloe is around and the trailer just doesn't want to show her. Again, I don't know if anything's been confirmed and y'all are welcome to let me know.
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penisbilt · 5 months
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the bittersweet but absolute flood of relief that comes from admitting defeat at living independently, to have to move back in with parents. we tried! we gave it our best shot for almost 3 years! but living like this (being on our own) is just not possible for us at this time of our lives. we've finally proved it to ourselves that we can't do it. it'll be okay to let ourselves rest now
#latimers parents not mine!!!! i am NOT moving back to florida LOL#really hope that the changes will be good for my mental health. this apartment is toxic to us#ive been on the verge of meltdowns Kind Of A Lot lately. imnot doing great#extremely dependent on substances. just to reach a baseline level of functioning. but even that isnt working as much anymore#the only things i do on my phone or tablet these days is like. 2 mobile games. and skirting past my dms to check latimers blog#its too overwhelming to even open discord these days yknow. everything on earth is too much for me right meow#i havent been drawing i havent been social online OR irl i havent been cooking or creating#i havent been keeping up with personal hygiene like at all im particularly ashamed about that one#i've been really bad about doing my T the past few months which is a HUGE shame because im SO fucking hyped to be on it#theres just. too many obstacles in getting it done half the time. and the other half of the time i just forget#anyway. anyway.#our lease ends in july so between now and then we're just gonna try our best to tolerate our living situation enough to get by#there's a light at the end of the tunnel. and its called 'i only have to be in charge of like 2 rooms at most. and not a household!'#we're gonna try to slowly comb through all our things between now and then so the process of moving wont suck as bad#cuz listen. its pretty fucking bad right now#maybe not for other people. but it is for me. and its okay to let myself come to terms with that#im just. so relieved. still very stressed! but theres at least light at the end of the tunnel and its only like 2 months away#ill be able to draw guilt-free again. ill be able to just EXIST guilt-free#i dont think ive felt guilt-free for just existing the way i do since like. turning 20#i know my mom wouldve loved if i stayed home forever. and im sad i cant be there for her#but ever since i had a fight with my dad at 15 or 16 it just really felt like he didnt want me there more and more#maybe as the youngest he was resenting that i was preventing him from becoming an empty nester or something. i dont know#because all the other kids had been moved out and on their own at least once but i had never left home before#i dont know if he'd be heartbroken or not to hear that i feeling like he was resenting me. but thats the energy i was picking up for years#i dunno. i dont know#anyway. back to housing. for now im going to try to relax and store energy for the moving process#the huge pile of things by the kitchen? i dont have to worry about that becoming permanent because we're leaving in 2 months#the general discord of the state of our possessions? we have to go through everything to pack it all anyway. we can move in RIGHT this time#when we moved in here we didnt have a car or license so we were dependent on latimers 3-hr-drive-away parents to help us move#just /across town/. and we had a whole month between leases! but it still had to be done in a weekend
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charonean · 5 months
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Sometimes I think about how much my little world I made three years ago has grown, and I get really emotional.
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sizzleissues · 5 months
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Thank you Olivia Rodrigo, Chappell Roan, the Cranberries, the last Dinner Party, Mitski and many more for getting it. You get it. (‘:
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starfieldcanvas · 1 year
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for every "how dare you plan to spend money out of your entertainment budget while i, a complete stranger to you, am still poor" post i see i am buying another $3 worth of crabs
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fitzrove · 6 months
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Its ok maybe if you look up the lyrics to was für ein grausames leben and read them in english you will be okj<3
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the-flaming-nightmare · 8 months
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Moodboard Tag Game
Thanks for the tag, @anewkindofme! 💚
Rules: post a picture of a place, animal, plant, season, character, hobby, color, gemstone, and food that reminds you of yourself/represents you
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Road to the Madera County countryside (bottom left corner), wolf (top middle), Venus fly traps (top right corner), autumn (bottom right corner), Sam Winchester from Supernatural (direct middle), reading (middle left), red (top left corner), ruby (middle right), and pancakes (bottom middle).
Tagging (if you wanna): @angelique-of-the-volturi-guard, @northbeastart, @craycraybluejay and @rhoooooo
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permanentreverie · 8 months
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so i may be moving in the next few weeks 😵‍💫
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