#or like when you ask how ive been i know you mean well

[cupidsribbns]

ellie, who you definitely don't have feelings for.

ellie, who you feel nothing but platonically for. you just appreciate her weirdly perfect face– as a friend. and those green- no, olive tinted eyes; the way they widen when you say something a tad affectionate. as a friend.

or the way you can always see her uneven dimples, but you can really see them oh so well when she smiles.

the smile that slowly spreads across those big stupid cheeks scattered with freckles— the same freckles which trail all the way down to her ankles, the ones that you don't care about. at all.

you've noticed she furrows her eyebrows. a lot. when she was thinking particularly hard about something stupid you asked her, or when she's confused, which seems to be a lot, or when she seems a little too quiet when you announce you're finally going on a date– the silence doesn't mean anything at all. she’s just happy for you, obviously.

so much so, she sits and waits till you're back from your frustratingly long date and listens to your undecided yaps– well, tries to. how long have you been talking about this fucking date? ellie can't remember, she can’t listen to this shit.

sitting rigidly, she picks at her nails while throwing an occasional “mhm.” and “oh really?” to really sell it. you don't even notice she's not listening. wow. mustve been a pretty fucking great–

“ellie. are you even listening?”

shit.

ellie looks up blinking a few times before running a hand through her hair. she’s uncomfortable. you've been around long enough to notice these things. the things even ellie doesn't notice.

“sorry yeah- right. m’ here. i’m listenin’.”

you relax to some extent and continue, yet your words are now laced with insecurity,

“okay so, i was talking to her and i was like-”

you pause, noticing she’s spaced out again.“seriously what's wrong? if you want me to be quiet i will, just—”

cold fingers quickly but gently cradle your face before her scarred lips connect to yours.

a quick peck. that’s all it was. both bodies pulled away with hesitation.

“oh.”

“i’m so fucking sorry- shit. why did i do that, i didn't mean to do that—”

she’s quickly pulled back into a kiss.

ellie, who you definitely have feelings for.

ellie, who you have now discovered, you love kissing.

a/n: haiii um this is the first ever fic esc thing ive wrote and the first thing ive wrote in YEARS so. its not great! and i dont know how i feel about it! but pls b kind! if you got this far i love u okay bye love u 💘

thank u @amourrs & @caraphernellie 4 proofreading love u

[walnutcookie]

I can talk about glisten and looey in the tos au because thats not spoilers giggles. ive been thinkings about them. this isnt about anything specifically im just gonna be yap yap yapping away abt them

since ive been asked before: no ships are canon in this au, but the relationships are intentionally kept vague, so interpret them however youd like! (except for proships.)

FOR CONTEXT: glisten and looey are artists in this au! :] they use silly wacky machines and tools to help them create art, trying to inspire kids to create art themselves while also demonstrating how machines can be useful in the subject of art

glisten and looey mean so much to me aughhfhgh. Two toons who are haunted by how people percieve them. their personalities are so different but i feel like they share a lot of the same insecurities... In most circumstances i dont think theyd ever be close enough to talk about that with each other, but in this au since the toons were born with the one they were paired with, they all have an extremely close bond with their pairings. they were in such a vulnerable state when they were first created but they were there to help one another adjust, and they spend most hours of the day with or near their partner, so they all become pretty inseperable. Because of that, in this au glisten and looey are comfortable talking to each other about their insecurities :] its nice for them to have someone who understands them even if their issues are different

i dont think looey is much of the gossip type, he doesnt do it much with other people but oh BOY when hes with glisten hes a yap machine. they spend hours just yapping about nonsense and drama GNFLFJF painting session and they just yap the whole timeee

They both have issues when it comes to recieving praise for their work - imposter syndrome plagues both of them, and they both feel a little undervalued by guests and their peers for how much effort they put in. glisten tends to put a lot of emphasis on what parts he did specifically in the art he and looey make together. if you insult looeys art he WILL get pissed off and defend his talent, its not that he thinks looey is a bad artist at all but he worries that people will think that looey is a better artist than him and feels like he needs to make sure people know what how skilled he is so that people dont think looey is better than him. There are some underlying competitive feelings but he cant really help it, he knows its not a competiton and tries to fight those thoughts but tis just how his brain works </3. Looey is the opposite of this, where they feel too goofy and unprofessional for his job, and he feels inferior in comparison to glisten whos charismatic and dresses well and talks so confidently about his art ,,, (to specify i dont think one is exactly better than the other! i dont know exactly what their art would look like, im still thinking abt it, but its less that one is better and more that theyre both more skilled in different aspects of art, which is part of why their pieces they work together on look so good.)

glisten does looeys makeup along with his own every morning >:] being a painter hes just good with brushes in general so every morning he wakes up, puts his makeup on, and then puts matching makeup on looey hehehe,,, he dislikes looeys sense of fashion but try as he might he cant help with that part GBDLFNFK. (Looey never likes the clothes glisten dresses them up in, it doesnt feel like him. glisten always has to dress elaborately so he feels professional but looey doesnt feel professional in the Slightest so it feels too fake to dress that way. they feel silly in the Bad Way not the looey silly way)

I think the actual classes they teach would probably have like a bunch of art desks where kids can mess around with a bunch of tools and gadgets to help them make straighter lines and circles and stuff, maybe those cool desk tops that spin yknow... Theyd show off the bigger tech they use to make their own elaborate art too like in the second photo above but maybe theyd also give kids a step-by-step on how to draw one of the toons, similar to the animation studio classes at disneyland if you know what i mean ? I can imagine theyd both be super supportive towards the kids too teehee,, glisten would praise their artwork like it was made by picasso and then looey would jump up and down and call it awesomely terrific. I havent thought much about how each class would work ngl

[wombywoo]

i know you have probably been asked this so many times — but what brushes do you typically use? any helpful videos i can reference to get portraits and overall realism sketching down, maybe ones that you used starting out? or just.. tips overall?

artists like you and m0cktails really inspire me to try and pursue a different route with my art, one that was totally unexpected but pleasantly rewarding when i tried it out!!! you have a great eye for features and overall composition of a piece, i started being a fan due to your ghostsoap art but i honestly think ive started to like seeing your OCs too haha

please don’t feel pressured to answer i know i kind of asked a lot!!

Hey there! I've briefly reviewed some of the brushes I use in some posts here and here! For the most part, I stick to one standard brush, as well as the airbrush and some other 'effect' brushes as I need them. I'm a photoshop devotee, unfortunately 😔, so a lot of my process is futzing around with their admittedly stellar editing tools

Truthfully, I don't have any concrete tips or videos for this sort of thing. I started out as a pencil artist, doing more and more realistic portraits the better I got, and then eventually turned to digital art (a bit reluctantly) So a lot of that was just self-taught; finding my own way how to implement certain techniques, and amassing a foundation that would allow me to draw all the stuff in my brain, lol

As for advice--I'd say to learn how to evolve out of your comfort zone. It's good to know what type of style or subject matter you feel you're best at--this is a natural inclination most artists have, and it informs the pieces your mind wants to create. But try pushing the limits of what you think might be 'too tedious' or 'too advanced'. More often than not, the thing holding your art back is that gut instinct of 'I can't do this, so why bother trying'. I used to feel this way about hands (enemy of the state, confirmed) And yeah, the easy cop-out is to just shove them all in pockets or behind backs etc. But in learning how to overcome that obvious challenge, I grew to really appreciate the way a hand can shape a composition. In fact, I have to hand it to--💥 ✋

Anyway! My next bit of 'advice' would be to go absolutely bonkers nuts with references. Don't listen to any fraud or fool who says using references is cheating !!!!! They lie!!!!! I swear, my art only looks the way it does because I am a reference hound who spends hours and hours on google/pinterest/stock sites for the perfect angle of the perfect pose, just so I can relate it to the image I have in my head.

For realism--look at real stuff! This sounds dumb, but it helps. Start paying closer attention to people around you; their faces, the way the light accents certain things, unique features, etc. I'd suggest figure studies if that's something you're into (I don't do studies, personally, because I just jump into massive pieces and can't do anything simple 😅 welp) but it does help immensely to study humans in real life and try to translate that onto the page

So yeah. Tbh, the best method for improving art is to simply DO IT. And the fact that you're seeking out further advice and tips means that you have some motivation--so use it! Hope this helps <3

[ender-cloud]

NEW UPDATE!!! God I love Lanyon so much im so hyped to dive into this

Tgs spoilers under cut

Something ive noticed with many characters in TGS is their persistence to keep everyone to have this view of them. Jekyll, of course, wants to be seen as the perfect, put together, leader of the society, while Hyde wants to be seen as someone who doesn’t really care about stuff, someone who’s tough and carefree.

In this case Lanyon seems to be closer to Hyde than Jekyll on this front. He wants to keep his “i dont care about anything” appearance, it shows how he presents himself in studies as well as playing the guys in his university. Even now Lanyon sometimes acts as if he doesn’t care about Jekyll or his issues but in reality, Lanyon cares a lot for very certain things.

By trying to act as though he doesn’t care makes it so he cares more, and Jekyll is reasonably confused by this.

I like how Jekyll more approaches Lanyon being confused and just wanting to understand why than a more judgmental approach. Jekyll just doesn’t understand, I dont think he’s Judging Lanyon as much as he just wants to know why.

He has a different goal to prove himself to people so he wants to know why Lanyon can prove himself but chooses not to.

To bring back what i said last week; Lanyon is smart, he knows things, but he acts like he doesn’t as a way of defying his father. But now that im looking at it, it’s s once again an example of reputation and how trying to keep it up can hold you back on many fronts.

Lanyon was quick to change the subject, he doesn’t want Jekyll, or anyone around them, to figure out the truth but the seeds had already been planted in Jekylls mind and now he’s connecting some dots he hasn’t thought of before.

“The second you put your mind to anything, you take to it like a duck in water” Lanyon puts his mind to a lot of things but I think he truly only gets into them if he actually wants to.

For example; when he was trying to not Care about jekyll during the society fair thing (i need to reread so bad I just dont have the time) he wasnt able to, it was like he was trying to force himself not to care like his university days but whenever he saw Jekyll he had to remind himself over and over again to push that care down.

Lanyon might’ve not needed to force himself to care as much during university but it might’ve taken a bit to get to this point of being able to do it easily. But if its something he truly cares about he has a hard time pretending that he doesn’t or is very determined to keep it like his reputation.

Ngl, if I was Lanyon and someone looked at me like that I would break in a second.

Lanyon can tell that Jekyll is close to figuring him out and its both scary in this moment aswell as surprised. No one has been able to put this together, no one else has seemed to care this much before or has gotten so close to him to see multiple signs

Lanyon is stronger than me and did not break but I would’ve been in shambles.

Lanyon Always says that he doesn’t care when Jekyll catches him? I think that shows how much he does care if he has to constantly remind that he doesn’t means that he must show that he does at some points, and it also indicates that Jekyll asked more in the future, just because of Lanyon saying he said it whenever he was caught of guard.

I genuinely love Lanyon so much, there’s so much to his character and its so interesting to me, he definitely is up as one of my favorite characters of all time. He just as so much depth to him, how much he doesn’t care yet does care, I like characters with a lot of depth more than just what you can see on the surface.

Whenever we get to see his thoughts it can give us more explanation and more of an understanding than what Jekyll had seen.

I want to know why Lanyon brought this up, the only thing I can think of is trying to lure Jekyll out but it’s still interesting,

[nameuserlee]

Sylus — Night of Secrecy 💋❤️

❤️- Screenshots -❤️

❤️ - Kindled scene below the cut + my thoughts/rambling -❤️

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Uhm. Wow. Just, wow. My sincere congratulations to Sylus and MC, the kiss card finally came and so did they, hallelujah.

I still can't believe this card is real, though. I'm genuinely dizzy, and I mean that in the best possible way. Because it’s sooo perfect. 10/10. No notes. Would swipe for again in a heartbeat.

I didn’t really know what I wanted their first kiss to look like. But I know that whatever I could’ve imagined wouldn’t have been nearly as good as this was. Now let me yap about this!

MC finally gets to bring Onychinus' leader to her place! After learning he needs a place to crash for 3 days before leaving for “business”, MC very generously offers her apartment as a safe house, both to keep him close and to figure out where he’ll be going since he won’t tell her (for her safety, of course).

And my god, these 3 days of them living together are the cutest, most domestic thing I’ve ever had the pleasure to read.

Shopping for groceries together, getting him his own pair of house slippers, him using (all of) her body wash. Sylus being in her space feels right, despite the smaller doorframes and treacherous bathroom cabinets.

(Grown ass man needs us to blow on his boo-boo. ADORABLE.)

But nevermind how cute this is, the situation is still unusual. Sylus and MC’s worlds kinda clash, despite how well they now get along and how much they care for each other. They are both aware of this, and no matter how fun this little play-pretend is, it’s going to have to end soon.

On their drive to the supermarket, Sylus prompts MC with a question: “When you’re in danger during a mission, do you think of anyone?” And the exchange that follows means a lot to me.

“But after my dirty work is done, I’ll wash my hands before going home.” I need this line tattooed across my forehead.

Sylus can’t leave his life back in the N109 zone, but he also doesn’t want to give up MC. And above all else, he wants to keep her safe. He tries to keep her away from his actual “business” as much as he can (which explains why he refuses to tell her where he’s going after their 3 days together).

If it weren’t for the N109 zone being risky for him to stay in right now and MC very conveniently proposing her place, he definitely would’ve found somewhere else to crash.

And so his best way to protect her while indulging their desire to see each other is to promise to “wash his hands before going home.” Whenever he gets to come back to her, he is not bringing his work to her. He will not allow himself to carelessly “taint” her life with his lifestyle. Very sweet, very thoughtful, very mindful (are we still saying mindful in 2025?) .

I’m gonna fast forward to their last night together/the kindled scene because I fear I could talk about every single line in this card.

Where to even begin.

BEST PROMPT IVE EVER SEEN ARE YOU KIDDING ME??

MC initating the kiss means everything to me. Thinking back to their first meeting, it’s him forcing her to resonate with her. Now, she’s pretty much the one who sets the pace in their relationship, which leads to this beautiful first kiss. It’s just too good.

“You really don’t want me to leave?” NO SIR SHE WANTS TO CLIMB YOU LIKE A TREE SHE WANTS YOU BAD and there’s no more denying it. She’s been worried sick throughout the whole card about him, trying to make the most out of their time together, and now that it’s down to the last hours, she wants it all.

And when things start to get heated, our consent king doesn’t only ask her once, but TWICE if she wants to do it.

And it’s soooo HOT!

In the kindled, he hopes MC hasn’t changed her mind, since she kinda nudges him away right after saying yes. He wants this to happen just as badly, but no matter what he’s always, always going to put her first, and so he checks in again with her.

Is this the bare minimum? Well yes! But I still think it’s worth noting. Especially if, again, we compare to how cold he was with her at the beginning of the relationship and how he was forcing her to go along with what he wanted.

Consent is sexy, asking for confirmation is hot as hell. 12/10 would smash again.

[binesetakeout]

last rb (yeah im getting into last rb like people did on twitter w last rt sorry it feels more polite to keep my nonsensical thoughts to my own blog)

anyway never ask me why so much (for) stardust makes me insane in my own private brain feels like a love letter to me specifically

[puppppppppy]

learning abt friendship decay and "not reaching out to your friends for months at a time unprompted is not neurotypical behaviour" has me feeling a certain way

[moeblob]

Rey, who is in my very biased opinion, one of the funniest "girls" I have because she's just a guy, truly. Like Rey is just short for Reynold because he was recruited by a a goddess to help the hero she selected and the hero is conveniently Reynold's younger brother. So he agrees to help under the condition that the goddess gives him a female body for the other world. She's like "really odd flex but whatever" and gives him a female form and he's like "you know. I can't really blame anyone but myself for not specifying 'please don't turn me into a Lisa Frank personification'."

[butchnavi]

i miss stupid rafaela

[girlivealwaysbean]

sometimes my boobs hurt so much i think they're gonna bleed surely this is normal right

[blindedguilt]

//Happy 20th Anniversary, Drakengard! I've been fighting to write and finish up my inbox asks before the 25th of Obtober gets here (I have plans and i INTEND to follow through on them), and currently... I have a bunch of drafts :,) I'll get some soon, I promise!! I thought to myself "If I even get at least two done before the month is up I'll feel content with myself" so fingers crossed!! //Anyways, I made some art of the boy to celebrate~

//I'm gonna try a challenge run for Drakengard after this: I'm honestly doubtful it can be done entirely, but I'm going to try and see how far I can get in the game just using Leonard lmao //I'll keep you posted on how far I get fkghsdkghbkdjf

[2-kamikou-1]

ok but no guys seriously how do you ask for reassurance in a way that doesn't make you look like a stupid yandere stereotype

[pastellmochi]

what kind of sicko would come up with this

[thebigqueer]

Your breakup really really reminds me of my first (and only) wlw relationship/breakup everything you're saying hits home a lot. You will get through it but tbh it's so hard to heal and it still grinds my gears when I think about her and how we broke up. Idk if that helps but I understand what you're going though

YEAH MAN ITS TOUGH OUT HERE FR!!! its not my first queer relationship but like something about this is genuilnely the most world-shattering romantic experience ive had cuz we went into this soooo head over heels for each other like we were literally moving SO fast. and at the time i was like is it ok for us to even be moving this fast (probs tmi but we were literally making out shirtless by like 2nd time we even made out) (probs not a big deal to most people but i experienced a LOT of new things with her that id never experienced befoer & the fact that i was so WILLING to do it so fast was what surprised me the most) but then i was like okk whateverrr i really like how fast we're moving. and i was like 'damn if were moving this fast & if im feeling so good it has to end soon right like theres no way life is going to let me just be happy w this' and then i was like 'no elts not think about it' and then what do you know 5 months later she brekas up w me. and neither of us did anything wrong but it was so random??? like i dont understand how one moment shes telling me how excited she is to spend the entire semester with me and then literally 36 hours later tell me shes not feeling an emotional connection but wont even give us the chance to work it out. i know she also broke it off for personal reasons but its like... this was something we could have TRIED to work out you know!!! maybe it wouldnt have worked in the end but literally nothing felt off to me at all & if id known she was feeling this way i wouldve done my best to make things better. the entire breakup was so sudden and honestly im really not mad at her because i know how nerve-wracking it is to be in your first relationship. i think its just that im really dispapointed she gave up on us so easily you know??? didnt even give us a chance to figure it out

[alchemiclee]

as a fellow introvert; we are social creatures. introverts who purposefully see no one for months on end are usually just in a cycle where its been so long since they’ve hung out that it’s too intimidating for them to do anymore. i 100% feel tired after hanging out with my friends but i DO also feel happy and refreshed! tl;dr - you’re super normal lol. try to reach out to a couple people just to chat this week <3

thanks for reaching out I really appreciate it❤️ but I have to rant a bit. I allow you to ignore it!

I wish to not be a social creature because going too long without having a friend to talk to or not having someone to talk with almost daily feels bad and it's so hard to have a friend when I need one D:

i've been reaching out to people for the last few weeks or so but they don't reach back. try playing games with people but they play with their other friends or dont feel like playing. invite people to hang out but they say maybe and never give an answer or don't respond.

I don't want to bother my closest friends in our group chat too much in our group chat but the chat is mostly me sending messages with no response and even couple times saying I need a friend when I was having bad days but they didn't want to chat and I dont want to force anyone to entertain my lonely depressed ass. (especially when all I really needed was to talk about the new star rail stuff to distract me but I don't think they've finished it yet so I don't want to spoil) they live together so they always have to socialize and probably make each other tired without needing to add me to it.

so i've also been trying to reach out to new people, like joining twitch chats again for the first time in years. but that never goes well and doesn't satisfy my social needs. too many people talking at once and being the new person no one cares about and all....getting to know a new is very exhausting. but it's so hard to just be able to skip all that getting to know each other stuff jump straight into talking about a thing we both like (in this case it's star rail and cosplay and maybe art) I don't have enough already-known people to reach out to and i'm too tired to do the small talk dance until it's appropriate to jump into special interest territory. being autistic is so exhausting. I with to be one of those rare autistics I sometimes hear about that have 0 interest in social interaction at all

so as you can see, i'm trying. so hard. to the point I'm exhausting myself. it's been too much work for no payoff and makes things feel worse when the outcome isn't what I need and its constant reaching with no one grabbing my hand back. so I keep making annoying tumblr posts about it. i'm so sorry to anyone that reads my nonsense 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 this is a normal thing with me but it's usually kept to my other blog that's reserved for more serious posts like this but I tried posting here as a way to "reach out" and see if it invites any friendly friends or something but I don't think i'm doing it right...

(but I am going to a con tomorrow with someone I haven't talked to in like 2 years. but we don't have anything in common anymore so theres not much to talk about. he's the only person who responded to me after trying to reach out for like a month but I fear it will only exhaust me being around too many people and not help this gross need to have a deeper connecting socialization D:)

[hakugreenfinch]

"you should absolutely go for a scholarship abroad" they dont know i spent 5 months studying abroad and during those 5 months only once did anyone that wasnt a teacher try talking to me and even she went "oh" when i said i was an international student and just. left