#or just trauma in general
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was talking with a friend about how some of dunmeshi fаndom misunderstands kabru's initial feelings towards laios.
to sum up kabru's situation via a self-contained modernized metaphor:
kabru is like a guy who lost his entire family in a highly traumatic car accident. years later he joins a discord server and takes note of laios, another server member who seems interesting, so they start chatting. then laios reveals his special interest and favorite movie of all time is David Cronenberg's Crash (1996), and invites kabru to go watch a demolition derby with him
#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#kabru#kabru already added laios as a discord friend. everyone else in the server can see laios excitedly asking kabru to go with him#what would You even Do in this situation. how would YOU feel?#basically: kabru isnt a laios-hater! hes just in shock bc Thats His Trauma. the key part is kabru still says yes#bc he wants to get to know laios. to understand why laios would be so fascinated by something horrific to him#and ALSO bc even while in shock kabru can still tell laios has unique expertise + knowledge that Could be used for Good#even if kabru doesnt fully trust laios yet (bc kabru just started talking to the guy 2 hours ago. they barely know each other)#kabru also understands that getting to know ppl (esp laios) means having to get to know their passions. even if it triggers his trauma here#but thats too much to fit in this metaphor/analogy. this is NOT an AU! its not supposed to cover everything abt kabru or laios' character!#its a self-contained metaphor written Specifically to be more easily relatable+thus easy to understand for general ppl online#(ie. assumed discord users. hence why i said (a non-specific) 'discord server' and not something specific like 'car repair subreddit')#its for ppl who mightve not fully grasped kabru's character+intentions and think hes being mean/'chaotic'/murderous.#to place ppl in kabru's shoes in an emotionally similar situation thats more possible/grounded in irl experiences and contexts.#and also for the movie punchline#mynn.txt#dm text#crossposting my tweets onto here since my friends suggested so
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Imagine getting triggered over Toontown corporate clash dialogue couldn’t be me
#god this is the lamest side effect of ptsd#or just trauma in general#unhealthy management of stress? constantly being on edge? being scared to socialize?#nah this is the worst part because it’s so embarrassing#anyways ‘can you say owch?’ Flint bonpyre your days are numbered#god man if you hate belittliling why do you do it to me#why are you like this#is everyone else like this?#‘hi I’m your narrator. Cody is now going to go into a brief downward spiral questioning if his f/os love him and why he is always bullied’#I mean if flints like this are other cogs like this too? in the cog suit description I think there was a part talking about manipulating -#deals and toons#and now I’ve been really worried that my f/os#(specifically Misty (because my abuser was a woman and as a result I was scared to talk and make friends with girls) and Allan (because#-he’s a higher ranking cog))#wouldn’t actually love me and would manipulate and hurt me in our relationships#and I’m scared they would take the chance to infantilize me and condescend me#and I have absolutely massive trauma relating to that#also if you bring up that Misty was treated badly I was bullied severely by many kids that were bullied too#like I would see it play out two or three years before they would call me slurs and shit#so I’m scared it might be like that#I don’t know why people don’t like me and consider me the lowest of the low#I think it’s because I’m neurodivergent and transgender#but everyone hated me#the only person who would really hang out with me the whole year was actually really creepy towards me#and the others all went away because the school was shut#I don’t know I’m just scared my f/os would infantilize and hurt me for the same reasons my abuser and every who bullied me did#if that makes sense#like I’m actually tweaking I’m panicking#why am I always the denizen that has to suffer#it’s always me
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So.. uh, Sonic X Shadow generations huh?
#sonic#sonic x shadow generations#sonic the hedgehog#shadow the hedgehog#fav#WE ARE SO BACK#THE PERSON I WILL BECOME THIS AUTUMN#MY BOI CANT CATCH A BREAK#FUCK I JUST REALIZED I SPELT TRAUMA WRONG SHIT--
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Idk if it's just because I don't interact with the fandom a lot, but I feel like there's some untapped potential with the parents of EAH. Like, it's one thing when you're 16, having been raised your whole life to fulfill a certain role, learning that you can be whatever you want to be and reject your destiny.
It's another thing when you're 40 years old with 3 kids and a spouse you probably don't even love, who did the whole destiny thing already, only now learning that there was a choice in the matter two decades too late. You're a whole ass adult with kids and responsibilities who's just now learning how to be a person and choose life decisions for yourself, grappling with the fact that you never really wanted this life and this feeling of helplessness, but you still raised your children to go through the same thing that you did. Maybe your kids are right to resent you for it. Maybe you resent your own parents for it.
#i just dont see enough explorations of the generational trauma angle of the whole thing#idk maybe im just not looking hard enough#anyway get me a fic about the Charming siblings dealing with their parents' divorce because they realize they dont love each other#like they dont HATE each other they just start being people for the first time and realize theres no connection between them#do you see the vision?#ever after high
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do yall ever think about bruce/batman!clone danny standing in front of his bathroom mirror after finding out he was a clone and silently tracing his face. The slope of his jaw and point of his chin. The high angle of his cheekbones and the shape of his eyes, the curve of his brow bones and the shape of his nose. The volume of his hair and the way it curls and gets fluffy when it gets too long.
His hair is black the same way a crow's wing is black. His dad's hair is black the same way a black bear's fur is black. His dad's eyes are blue like the ocean is blue. Danny's eyes are blue the same way a glacier is blue.
His dad has a square jaw and straight flat hair, and he tans and gets a face full of freckles when he's out in the sun for too long. Danny burns like a lobster and his face remains untouched. Danny has a sharp jaw and tall cheekbones, and Sam says when he's not smiling there's almost something regal about him. You would never call Jack Fenton "regal" when he's not smiling.
Sam says when he's not smiling he looks scary the same way a stone statue is. Jack Fenton when he's not smiling looks scary the same way that german shepherd staring at you across the street is.
Do you ever think he grew up wondering if he was adopted. Because of course, he has black hair and blue eyes like his dad. But having the same color doesn't make you someone's child.
Or, worse, things he's heard from the other kids and the other parents and even some of his teachers growing up; that he was the product of an affair. And that his dad was just too stupid to notice. And Danny would defend his parents until the day he died, because Jack Fenton wasn't an idiot and Maddie Fenton wasn't a cheater.
But doubt comes in with fickle tongue. his parents swear up and down that he is their child when he asks about either. That Danny just had his grandparents' features, but he was their son and they loved him.
But Danny doesn't look like either of his parents. His mom's eyes are blue like an aquamarine and Jazz's too. And they burn like lobsters in the sun too, but Jazz gets freckles on her face and so does Maddie. And as Danny grows up he doesn't bulk up or get stocky like his dad did, and when he hits puberty he doesn't shoot up like a tree like Jack Fenton did.
He stays small, and they say he's a late bloomer (and he is), or that he just has his mom's height. But he's fast and has good stamina, and some days it feels like he's built entirely different from his family. That the things they went through growing up just didn't apply to him. Jack and Maddie Fenton both had acne and breakouts when they hit puberty, and Jazz inherits it and he's seen the amount of skincare products she keeps on her side of the bathroom.
And then he hits puberty and breaks out maybe once or twice, but his skin stays clear for the most part and the problems and changes his dad went through just don't happen to him.
And the truth is worse than all of the lies.
How horrifying.
#dpxdc#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dp x dc#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc crossover#dpdc#danny fenton is a clone#clone danny fenton#clone danny#thinking about the inherent trauma that comes with growing up as a clone and not knowing and questioning everything about yourself#thinking about the amount of effort and lying that Jack and Maddie would've had to to do if they wanted to pass Danny off as their bio son#the MEDICAL RECORDS#danny's medical history is completely different from theirs. any generational health problems the waynes have would/could be passed down to#danny and he's completely oblivious to it up until the reveal. he'd have no idea about any medical risks until they hit him before that.#so many little things and inconsistencies that would just build and build and build until it finally came to a head and the truth came out#forever and ever and ever fascinated by the underlying horror of being a clone. there's a horror in being cloned but there's also a horror#in BEING a clone. like yes he could've always known from the start and that comes with its own set of issues BUT. just. him not knowing#for the longest time. the lies and deceit and betrayal. you know how adopted kids come out and talk about how they didn't know they were#adopted for the longest time and how traumatizing and betrayed they felt when they're finally told 15-20 years down the line? yeah that#i imagine finding out you're a clone is a lot like that.#i read a book in middle school once abt a girl moving to a new town with her family and getting these horrible nightmares and noticing how#everyone was acting strange around her. one of her nightmares was about the 30yo police officer being a shambling corpse talking to her#and at the end of the book she finds out she's actually the clone of a dead older sister and the police officer was her sister's boyfriend.#and she was in gymnastics but quit and her parents were so disappointed bc the og sister was a champion/award winning gymnastics player#and i never did finish the book but god am i reminded of that.#i love reading the dpxdc clone danny posts and they usually have him brush off being a clone which is literally totally fine but duUUDE#just imagine his own horror over it. its SOOO good
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#sofia coppola#female hysteria#divine feminine#girl blogger#this is what makes us girls#girl interrupted#girlblogging#girlhood#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#sylvia plath#my fig tree#fig tree#im just a girl#hell is a teenage girl#study motivation#studyblr#gossip girl#cinnamon girl#girlblog#this is a girlblog#serena van der woodsen#blair waldorf#lily rose depp#generational trauma#generational cycle#female rage#girl interupted syndrome#fiona apple
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devs are JERKkin me around- like, wELL-----
#they gotta be doin this on purpose#'ok we just made the gamers contemplate self sacrifice and the emotional burdens of cross generational trauma as well as Existence itself'#'BRING IN THE FLUFFY MAIDS!!!!!!!'#let the gamers pet the bnnunies and the kitties until their emotional wounds heal#(enough so they can handle the NEXT ponderational event ehuoehooo coughHACK)#SAVE ME horrible customer service cafe SAVE MEEEE#nu carnival#nu carnival rei#nu carnival dante#nu carnival olivine#mirage of scales#sweet♡heart attack
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someone give this man some support right this instant
#I love him so much#he's such good commentary on how disfigurement from trauma leads to disenfranchisement from the system and society in general#he just needs a job and a support system someone help him before I scream and throw a TANTRUMMM#spiderverse#spider verse#spiderverse 2#spider verse 2#across the spiderverse#spiderverse spoilers#the spot#jonathan ohnn#my art
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okay but you see sam has ALSO fallen for dean's act. sam also believes dean to be the macho, daddy's soldier, beer boobs cars guy he presents himself as. this is why sam makes fun of dean whenever he even lightly steps out of that mold and thinks it's harmless banter instead of attacking an insecurity. it's why he laughs when john talks down to dean in the early seasons and it's why he seems surprised when dean is more comfortable with himself in the later seasons. it's why he just scoffs but doesn't push it when dean puts up a front and refuses to talk about his emotions and just accepts whatever excuse he makes at face value. it's why he offers dean a strip club to make him feel better when cas dies. and this isn't his fault!! dean has spent a very long time perfecting this image in front of everyone and ESPECIALLY to sam because along with it comes safety and security and stability and the only person. who has consistently been able to see through it. is castiel
#charlie also a bit bc dean doesn't have to be desirable to her as a man or as a son#altho i would argue that she doesn't see through him he just doesn't perform as much for her. cas actively sees through it#this is why sam has never caught on to dean being queer also. btw. dean isn't closeted he's just never made a big deal of telling sam#you never really know your parents just the version of them they want you to see etc etc#anyway this is also why sam is thought to be More Sensitive in comparison#by people who have also fallen for the Act. i call this the General Audience Dean Act#because it was who he was SUPPOSED to be from kripke's pen until jensen went ummmmm no. he has trauma :) and forcibly gave him layers#this is also not samcrit btw i always need to clarify that#i am bad at sam studies but i think you could also write posts (and ppl have) about how dean doesn't truly know sam either#bc he has Little Baby Brother zoned him forever even though he is almost 40 by the end of s15
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in the nicest and most non-confrontational way possible. i feel like some of you think that anything that isn't directly openly spelled out for you within a story is "missed potential" or "unexplored." like. sometimes there are implied narratives. sometimes the point is that you as the reader are supposed to think and draw your own conclusions and participate in the story. the writers not directly spelling every little detail out for you doesn't mean that the story is poorly written or missed its own plot details somehow. PLEASE.
#if i get one more comment referring to zelda's draconification as wasted potential im going to lose it for real#that's not unexplored potential that is THE ENTIRE STORY. JUST BECAUSE THEY DONT BEAT YOU OVER THE HEAD WITH IT DOESNT MEAN ITS NOT THERE#i get this all the time with just like. link's trauma in general too.#like people will ask me 'do you think they should explore link's trauma more' and im like. they do#that's what the games are about. it's all there. they just don't directly state that that's what they're doing because theyre expecting you#as a reader to ENGAGE WITH THE DAMN TEXT BEYOND SURFACE LEVEL. UGHHHHHHH#WHATEVER. whatever#like i feel like some of you would read the great gatsby and be like#'there was a lot of missed potential to talk about the failure of the american dream' GIRL IT'S RIGHT THERE. JUST THINK A LITTLE#personal#and yeah obviously its not that deep its a video game but like. i am not making shit up when i write my comics and analysis.#I AM ENGAGING WITH THE TEXT. AS IS GENERALLY EXPECTED OF A READER#ugh ok whatever. im done now sorry
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Some sketches I did to try to get a feel for what I want my Rook to look like 🤔
#I'll probably have to change the hair tbh#I haven't seen hair quite like this in the cc videos#the one dreadlocks+half bun hairstyle I saw wasn't quite the right vibe?? too short tbh#and lacking some shape#I just hope someone mods bg3 hairstyles into the game......... I had this one specific bg3 hair mod in mind while I was drawing her#but I'd settle for any long dreadlocks hairstyle tbh 😔#ironically I think I'll end up going for the short one in game 🫠 I feel like the shape of it fits the vibe I'm going for with her#which is like. kind of edgy fjdjjfjf very angular#can you tell I'm eyeing the antivan crow background for my 1rst playthrough........#sketch tag#dragon age#datv#sleepyscribble#I love her face. I definitely want to keep her face exactly like this#I'm only unsure about the scar and the makeup#I was thinking something like a lightning scar on the side of her face#which I could use to come up with something for her backstory later(trauma <3)#story wise I have a general idea of where I want to go with her but it's very like. just vibes rn#I'm thinking of going for angst with 'taken into the crows as a kid + being a crow is a huge part of who she is'#and 'being a crow is something she might want to stop being. but she can't. because she doesn't know how to be anything else'#I started thinking abt that while reading through the backgrounds and I thought yeowch. I have to go with crow now#but other than that I'm also looking forward to playing mostly purple rook so nfncnncncm she'll be an absolute disaster#also in my head her name is renata and her voice sounds a bit like josephine's
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tim drake would rather die than kill innocent people and tim drake killed hundreds of supervillain henchpeople with long-range detonation explosives that one time are two separate headcanons that, contrary to what the fandom discourse would have you believe, can actually coexist at the same time.
there’s even a psychologist term for it.
it’s called compartmentalization!
#let’s be honest#the entire batfamliy “stuffers” from this#and while that’s not something generally talked about#I just find the concept so interesting#how they all justify their actions — both socially moral and socially in-moral — to themselves#particularly how they all justify their actions to themselves in different ways#and for more evidence about their compartmentalization: there’s obviously the fact that they all have superhero and civilian identities too#also#this might need to be a separate post#but#the fandom’s perception of each member of the batfamily as individuals#often read more like they have bought into the characters’s “masks” they wear due to trauma#the “masks” being how the batfam are completely willing to be only perceived as one-thing#because that’s easier than being a real human#with blood and pain and fears and failures#they’d much rather be#the nice one#or the funny one#or the smart one#(etc. etc.)#dc#dc comics#dc characters#batman comics#batfam#the batfamily#tim drake#robin#robin dc#red robin
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The bias is not always conscious
And that's the case with Stolas. That's it, that's basically the post, so you can count it as your tl;dr, but let me elaborate. :)
(A little gratitude note! Sorry @tealvenetianmask, I failed being concise here, but I thank you for encouraging me to put it all together :3 I also thank you for our conversations about Stolas and about museums in particular which heavily contributed to it)
I think there's some misunderstanding when people get offended by the suggestion that Stolas acts classist/racist. It seems that people assume we’re implying he is malicious and intentional with it, but the actual problem is that he doesn't think.
S2EP2, Seeing Stars, 1:29
The problematic behavior we're discussing is reflexive and internalized. Stolas was raised in an environment where the lower demon class is looked down upon, and while he believes he expresses nothing but deep respect for Blitzø and treats him as an equal…
Goodnight, Blitzø. S1EP7, Ozzie's, 14:50
And while you can see from this bow that this intention is sincere, which is both wonderful and fascinating—he preserved this profound gesture ever since he was a kid, despite being actively discouraged from doing so!...
[Stolas]: I'm Stolas! It's nice... Ouch! [Paimon]: Don't bow to that one! He bows to us! Idiot! S2EP1, The Circus, 7:40
He was still raised in privilege and influenced by the narratives around him. For him, it's acceptable because that's what he was taught is fine. It's part of his everyday speech, and he never actually asks Blitzø, or anyone else, how they feel about the literally belittling nicknames (like literally—do you notice how often he uses the word "little" when referring to imps?).
I mean... there's a lot, okay? I'm just going to pull out some examples off the top of my head. All of them are from Season 1, and I'll explain why later.
I was hoping you brave little imps would accompany us! S1EP2, Loo Loo Land, 5:15
Ugh, that's better... Where's Blitzy? He's my knight in shining armor, not you, littler ones! S1EP2, Loo Loo Land, 13:22
And it [grimoire] isn't supposed to be lent out to itty-bitty imps like yourself. S1EP5, The Harvest Moon Festival, 0:30
Greetings, tiny Wrath Ring imps! S1EP5, The Harvest Moon Festival, 8:22
[Stolas, in the background]: Who dares threaten my little impish plaything? S1EP6, Truth Seekers, 18:20
How the fuck did you get caught by humans? Are you little creatures not being careful up here? S1EP6, Truth Seekers, 19:38
He also takes pride in being part of Ars Goetia. That pride seeps into his mind whether he wants it to or not. He lives in a huge palace, never worries about money, can arrange a seat in a club that’s always booked out, and gets admitted to a hospital immediately, while hellhounds wait five years for a Hellbies shot.
Being part of the Goetia family is rather valuable, you know. S1EP2, Loo Loo Land, 4:39
Most of these examples come from Season 1 because, after the disastrous Ozzie’s date, Stolas begins to unconsciously cut back on this language. He seems to sense that something is wrong, though he doesn’t fully understand why. However, he is acutely aware of the problems with the transaction and the unfair dynamics it creates, and he is serious about putting Blitzø on equal ground by providing him with the means to run his business independently of Stolas.
And still, he maintains full control over the conversation during the Full Moon meeting, immediately dismisses Blitzø after one mistake, and throws him out. He continues to impose his narrative on Blitzø and…
I don't look down on you! How many times do I— When have I ever?! S2EP9, Apology Tour, 2:45
When have you ever indeed, Stolas? You literally look down on Blitzø saying that. This moment illustrates the problem clearly. He isn’t lying when he says he doesn’t look down on Blitzø because he genuinely believes he doesn’t.
Despite all said, Stolas is making a tremendous effort and is progressing, and he is far ahead of Stella, who is openly classist/racist and very conscious of her biases. So I believe—no, I know—he will get there one day. But not today.
This is something I take quite seriously, and I think people need to understand how dangerous this subtlety can be, as it happens all the time in real life too.
How often do you ask yourself why medical research groups are predominantly represented by white, cis, upper-middle-class males, and how this affects the efficiency of treatments suggested in these studies for everyone else—women, people of color, non-binary folks, and those who struggle financially?
How often do you visit museums and see art created by wealthy aristocrats who defined what constitutes 'fine art,' while 'folk art'—often created by marginalized communities—is overlooked and lost to time?
I could elaborate further on how deep and cruel this bias is, but I’ll stop here. I just ask you to consider why you might get offended when someone points out Stolas's subtle bigotry and why you might downplay it compared to the loud, aggressive Blitzø, whose anger and avoidant issues are obvious.
Just sit with it.
#and again let's exhale and repeat#Stolas's privilege doesn't mean his trauma or the bad side of being a royal don't matter#the only point is that he is just as flawed as everyone else#and if he isn't loud about it and is generally nice it doesn't mean the problem doesn't exist -- ACTUALLY IT MAKES IT A BIGGER PROBLEM#I actually relate to him in many ways just as I do to Blitzø#so please don't get at me trying to say I hate on him#I wish all the best to this owl and I love him as a character profoundly#helluva boss#helluva boss spoilers#stolas#stolas goetia#stolitz#stolas x blitz#blitz x stolas#helluva boss meta#akira's whimpery metas#it got kinda personal at the end lol
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"We tried." "Not hard enough."
9-1-1 (2018-)
#you might be asking yourself hey what the fuck#i am also asking myself this very question#something something healing generational trauma something something breaking the cycle#i don't know okay i just want to scream#tv: 911#hen wilson#eddie diaz#maddie buckley#howard chimney han#evan buck buckley#mythtakensgif#henwilsonedit#eddiediazedit#maddiebuckleyedit#evanbuckleyedit#chimneyhanedit#911edit#daily118#pretend this coloring makes any sense
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dick vs. apartment organization, a story in three parts
new teen titans 10, new titans 65, nightwing: target
"i can't believe this place." "i thought you were moving." "you live like a slob."
everybody's a critic dsfsfdsf
#dick grayson#dick grayson understands my organization system <3 maybe the disorder is just enabling me to be more orderly! you don't know#anyway black mirror!dick turning into a neatnik who's really reluctant to have any personal items around at all#so much that alfred is bugging him about how he should decorate more and make the place more 'his'#is in context obviously inspired by dick's general trauma-response flight from memories in the batman: reborn era#but in my heart it is also a trauma response to getting his apartment blown up <3#'haha nah i'm just a rolling stone' (<- guy whose firetrap of an apartment went up in smoke with all his worldly possessions)#hoc scripsi
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i don’t think it’s talked about enough that when jem first came to the london institute will described him as “very very quiet, lonely and sad”
#like in general i feel jem’s actually HORRIFYING backstory is never really like acknowledged enough#or his trauma#unlike will#just because jem was always kind#so i am thinking about this today! good evening all#jem carstairs#will herondale#tid
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