#or if it was just outright dumb? idk

[perenlop]

transphobia aside, its also a huge pet peeve of mine when people are like “oh tee hee i havent actually engaged with the canon material at all aside from maybe a few clips on youtube, but ive decided the canon is stupid shit anyways and fanon is all that matters!” like not only does that just feel disrespectful and rude for no good reason, especially in the context of indie creators, but it personally annoys me as someone who always overthinks this shit and has several tabs open when im just making headcanons or whatever, let alone writing a fic. like you just dont care? what’s the point, then?

[beastsovrevelation]

When Shadwell said "may the Armies of Glory march beside you" to Newt, Archangel Michael should have appeared, and sternly assured the only soldier of hers who'll go anywhere near the situation is the moron he's been swindling money out of, for decades.

[itsmistyeyedbi]

This might be a silly question but...do anyone of your detective's believe in fate? Why or why not? Did their view of it change after meeting Unit Bravo and experiencing the events of the twc books?

[guinevereslancelot]

so proud of myself for putting a big part of my last paycheck in my savings like an adult but now im gonna spend all my savings like an idiot 😵‍💫

[technicolorxsn]

love how there are pretentious video essays that just repeat the book and meander and ramble about house of leaves. it's what zampanó would have wanted. it is not, however, what I want

[snekdood]

Damn well. One of the clear ways you can tell my ex is bullshitting about me being anywhere near conservative is the fact that i get along well w the left leaning portion of my family vs the right leaning portion whomst i Do Not get along with or interact with

[phoebespenglers]

if your "activism" is more focused on sending death threats to and bullying the people with opposing viewpoints to your own than actually helping the marginalized people you claim to care about, then you're no activist. you're just a dick and a bully

[teaboot]

Wait you had autism and still got along with the other kids and knew what was going on with them?? I was never able to do that! I still chose to do my own thing but would have been unable to answer those questions.

I mean I didn't really WANNA make friends for a super long time so it didn't really matter? And if anyone was outright mean I don't think I noticed till like 6th grade.

After 6th a few other kids liked to throw or kick things at my face or steal my art supplies or give me mean nicknames- I remember almost all the boys in my class one year started a thing where if I got within 4 feet of them they'd yell "[tea] GERMS!" and make a dramatic mad-dash escape, and that was kinda hurtful, but IDK how long that was a thing??

Anyhow I started asking them if they had a crush on me or if they were just stupid, and when they asked what I meant I'd just be like "well there's two reasons boys act stupid around girls. Either you have a crush on me, or you're just always this stupid"

And that invariably led to them yelling "I'm stupid, I'm stupid!" or telling me, "I'd rather say I'm stupid than say I like you!"

Which might have been hurtful if I wasn't growing into a mild superiority complex that assured me I was smarter than them, and nicer than them, and there was really no need to desire the approval of stupid, mean people.

(This was, of course, backed up by the fact that my father was one of those mean, stupid sorts of people, and I fully beleived if I could handle him, I could handle anyone my size, and so what if you dont like me? My own dad doesnt like me, am i supposed to value your opinion?)

Then by highschool I got hot, and if one of them started chatting me up I'd just be like "You wrote in my yearbook in 2002 that I was a huge loser. Why would I want to hang out with you"

And by THEN I'd met enough genuinely fun, interesting people who actually liked me that I was never around anyone who openly disliked me anyways.

Not until I started to realize I wasn't 100% a girl and cut my hair off- Then I started hearing other girls whispering to each other that I looked like a lesbian- gasp- which, again, was actually pretty funny, 'cause then I'd just tell them not to get their hopes up 'cause I wasn't available.

Then I graduated, and moved, and it turns out I'm actually kind of hot funny smart and successful, and whenever I fall into the deep deep pit of dumb ugly stupid imposter-syndrome, I remember that as mean as other kids were sometimes, their parents thought I was the best.

So anyways get fucked Gabe from ninth grade, your mom used to give me candy and bail me out of detention. I had the biggest fucking crush on your mom dude

[changisworld]

Skz with possessive reader? 🤭 like reader is still a sub but can be veery jealous. Like if she sees a fan flirting with a member she wouldn't let go of that member (did i explain it enough? Idk😭please tell me if i did) and what do you think how would members react?? hihi just my thoughts (its supposed to be smut-) 😭

-🦇

YAMMYYAMMYYAMMY this would be so me i swear

I think leeknow, seungmin & also hyunjin would be SOOOO obsessed with the idea of you being possessive, especially right in front of their face BXBSBSBSB, holding their hand in front of any girl that speaks to them, purposely not laughing at anything the other person says but laughing a moment later if your boyfriend says something even less interesting, purposely kissing his cheek a few too many times knowing lipstick or lipgloss would stain their cheek, just to show they really are yours & yours only.

Would definitely make it up to you as soon as you got home by fucking you into the mattress, teasing you on your behaviour as your eyes are going teary from how good he’s fucking you.

“you like this cock don’t you, hmm? seem to be so jealous of anyone who steps near it”

“made for you, would never dare give it to anyone else, unless that’s what you’re wanting hmm? jealous jealous girl”

“so hot when you’re so protective y’know that? almost wanted to fuck you right there”

on the other hand, i think han, felix & probably changbin would be SO flustered by it!! the way your voice sounds more monotone while talking to the girl who you can swear flirted with them just by breathing too close to them! once you’ve successfully got the girl to get the hint & fuck off, you can feel your boyfriends eyes burning into the side of your face, honestly kinda star struck

of course once you have time for yourselves they’re so so quick to show you how much they love YOU & don’t want anyone else!

“so so pretty, so lucky for you, you look so cute when you’re jealous”

“so protective of me, makes me melt”

definitely buys you or makes you a gift to further show how much YOU mean to them🥲

OKAY so jeongin & bangchan i feel like they would get insanely turned on from it.. because why the hell wouldn’t they when you’re latching yourself onto his arm like a sloth pretty much & pretty much ushering them away from whoever you deemed was flirting or being too nice to them. the thing is though, they probably never catch on at first that you’re jealous & they probably just assume you’re tired or feeling a bit sick or something & they feel so silly when it finally clicks in their head.

they for sure try to tease you by acting even more dumb & asking you outright why you were acting that way, & the second you tell them that you WERE in fact jealous, they know just the way to make it up to you.

“i’m all yours, lemme show you how much i care, hmm?”

“you’re perfect for me & me only, don’t get jealous over anyone because they don’t compare, just look at you”

“if you could feel how good you feel trust me you’d never even want or need to be jealous of anyone else” he groans as he presses his tip past your folds

main masterlist here

->anon list & tag list are open!

@jisungml

[muffinsin]

Greetings. I know thyeth awaiteds of trial, aka, thoueths inbox, is full of requests, so, if thou doth perchance chooseth to bless thy anon, by choosing to grant myith humble pleads, take your time.

I sincerely ask of thou to consider thy dumb lil giggleshits by writing about the dimitrescu sisters (seperate, not as a polycule) reactions to their s/o (thats us!!! Thats you!!!) outright demanding to be 'bitten better' after getting a large wound/scar/scab or something, because, like, if im correct, thats just like, alot of ur bloodcells rising to reform damaged skin??? or something?? Idk. I failed science. I just think it would be funny to be like '(BELA/CASSANDRA/DANIELA), GIT OVER HERE AND BITE ME,, I HAVE PLACES TO BE AND I DO NOT NEED TO EXPLAIN TO PEOPLE HOW I TRIPPED AND FELL ONTO THE HANDLE (?? Do they have handles?) OF UR DUMB (friggen) SICKLE!!!"

I thanketh thee for thoueth time.

with utmost respect, thoueths truely,

Corvina, aka, stupid, medieval-talking dork.

-⚔️🧷

Haha I love this!! XD That’s some fancy talk right there🧐🎩! (Cassandra likes to insist on your point, biting to make her lover feel better. She’s just helping, really!)

Now, let’s get into this!🙌 :)

Masterlists

Bela

You’re bored, waiting for your girlfriend to finish up her work

Really, you doubt it will ever be finished, but at the very least Bela promised to set limits for herself as it comes to work, to avoid overworking herself, and to allow her to spend more time with you

Now, she probably would be more motivated to wrap things up immediately if she knew what you’re up to

Bored as you are, you desperately need something to do

And really, the castle- or village in general- doesn’t offer too much that doesn’t include murder

And even that isn’t your thing, at the very least not without Bela

As such you find yourself sitting at the unoccupied desk in her room, lazily playing with the sickle she left there for her nightly hunt

You’re sure she wouldn’t mind! After all, it’s not like you’re breaking it!

You’re merely playing with it!

What could go-

You flinch when it slips from you, then yelp when it’s sharp blade slices through your inner thigh, then falls from the chair and to the ground, at last laying bloodied between your shaking legs

Oh oh…

You whine a little as you look down at the cut, deep, but hardly lethal

The sight of the bloodied flesh and the feeling of the painful ache surrounding it is enough to have you run off to find Bela

Which is precisely why you find yourself the way you do now, sat down in her office chair, your face flushed and cheeks burning up as you look down at her

Her lips and tongue tending to your cut, her body below you as she kneels between your legs

Needless to say, it’s an explicit looking image, one that has your entire body tingle

Yet, the glare she shoots you over and over again has your thoughts stay in the gutter

You pat her hair apologetically, scratching softly at her scalp just the way she likes it

Soon enough, thankfully, your cut stops bleeding and no longer aches this much

Still, you know her work is not yet done

As such, you send her a shy smile, apologizing for foolishly playing with her weapon yet again

You don’t think it wise to point out that you only did so because you were bored. Her glare is deadly enough as is

Though, it’s adorable how her eyes soften when you scratch her scalp just right

And, admittedly, she looks adorable with her lips and chin stained in your blood

You gasp when she bites down beside the cut, then at the other side

Again and again, and again and again does she tend to the gentle bites

Soon, your entire thigh is throbbing, but experience tells you the sensation will pass soon and the skin will heal fast

You lean back against the chair as she rises and reaches into her drawer

You throw her a weak smile when she bandages you up, and can’t help but grin when she kisses your forehead

Your cheeks heat up again when she grabs your face, raising an eyebrow at you

Still, you can’t help but smile at her

“Don’t touch my things again”, she warns, her tone playful

You nod, happily taking the kiss you receive in return

Cassandra

You love Cassandra

You love every part of her, treasure her sadism and need to cause trouble as much as her rare, softer sides

You love her creativity, her love for the crafts

You love her weapons, and love that she builds and collects them

What you love less, however, is that she has a habit of leaving them out

And not only in the armory, out of their assigned spots

Not even only in her room, which is more like a battlefield with sickles and swords, axes and daggers scattered across the ground and the desks

No, your girlfriend instead leaves her weapons all around the castle for everyone to stumble into

Such as today

Admittedly, you were a little careless today, a little spaced out, not very conscious of your actions…admittedly, she told you not to be that at the castle

But, your little hypocrite of a girlfriend is just that, too!

Only has she never had an accident like this…

If she did, you’d regret not having it on camera

You open the closet, half humming to yourself, half zoned out

That is, until one of the weapons she stupidly forgot in there falls

She’s likely shut the closet with the weapon leaning against its door, careless as usual, or perhaps waiting for a maid to open her little death trap next

Instead, it’s you

You hiss and flinch away, yelling in all; surprise, anger, shock, fear and pain as your arm is sliced open

Blood drips from it and you immediately slap your palm across the cut, gritting your teeth at the searing pain

Not lethal, but likely to leave a scar

And still, your scream and the scent of your blood immediately attracts attention

When Cassandra swarms inside, you briefly allow yourself to think of grabbing the damn sickle and whacking it across her head, before grasping her shoulders and shaking her until your little troublemaker of a girlfriend begins to clean up her things

Countless times have you told her to be more careful!

To stop leaving her sharp tools everywhere!

By the look in your eye, the open closet and the sickle on the ground she immediately figures out what must have happened

In her eyes, you find worry, mixed with guilt and embarrassment

She knows, she’s about to get an earful and you aren’t likely to let her off the hook for that one anytime soon

She attempts to shoot you a smile, and while normally you’d return it, the pain has you only scowl at her in a mix of annoyance, love, and anger

You decide, she caused this

And she will fix it

Naturally

“Down”, you groan, clutching the bleeding cut on your arm

With surprising submission, she falls to her knees, her eyes wide and a surprised gasp falling from her lips when you press your arm to her face

It doesn’t even take a second for her to latch on

Gently, she pries your skin away to lick at the blood, her tongue slow and steady, her movements careful rather than bloodthirsty and wild

She knows, she isn’t really allowed to feed from you now

She’s meant to fix her mistake, so long as she doesn’t want to sleep on the cold side of the bed, something she detests, when her favorite spot is on top of you

Nonetheless, your girlfriend is moaning at your taste immediately, rolling her eyes subtly when you ramble on and scold her

You roll your eyes back at her playfully

You can’t truly be angry at her, not when her tongue and teeth are already working wonders at numbing the throbbing pain in your arm

You allow her to work on the wound for what feels like half an hour, sending flies onto the skin here and there

You aren’t entirely willing to think about their spit on you, but appreciate it when you feel your skin first tingle, then pull together slightly again

At the very least, your loving sadist knows how to treat wounds

Daniela

Some might call you clumsy

“Some” including your girlfriend and her sisters, and perhaps even yourself, if you swallow down your pride

And really, it doesn’t take all that much for you to get into trouble

Especially with your girlfriend, trouble is pretty much on the menu each day

What clumsiness you have, your girlfriend often adds to with her carelessness

As such, there have been countless incidents of running through the castle and slipping on some of the blood she carelessly spilled in the halls

Or the times she left her weapons out

Now that, is disaster waiting to happen

Often, more often than you’d like to admit, you end up injuring yourself with them somehow

Such as today

You’re racing past the halls again, eager to find your girlfriend

You know just where, too

The library, her favorite spot on a cool day like this

You giggle at the thought of her curled up by the fire, cuddled up among countless pillows and such

As you daydream, you begin to pay less and less attention to where you’re going

Or rather, what’s in your way

As such, you don’t see the sharp blade of her favourite sword sticking out of the vase in your way until the last second

And as such, your happiness is quickly interrupted when you catch a glimpse of it and quickly try to dodge it

Only does “dodging it” mean stumbling over your legs, failing to catch yourself on the railing of the stairs and tumbling down

The worst?

This isn’t the first time you accidentally fell down the stairs to the main hall

As you clutch your hip in pain, you can’t help but think:

You can’t let Cassandra and Bela know of this. Their teasing would never end!

Daniela though…surely she can keep her mouth shut if you confide in her

Besides, the ugly bruise on your hip should be treated

And who better to treat it than your lover?

When you find her, she’s over the moon to see you

She immediately abandons her blankets and pillows, books and snacks to wrap her arms around you

Still, worry, then humor glistens in her eyes when you wince a little once her hand connects with your hip

It seems, it only takes her a few moments to figure out what must have happened

Or at the very least that you got yourself into trouble again

You roll your eyes as she giggles, allowing her to lead you to her spot among the books

Below you is a thick, fluffy blanket, surrounding you and supporting your head are perfect pillows

You feel yourself starting to relax already, slowly lifting your shirt to expose the forming bruise at your hip

She coos a little at it

Then, a kiss is placed to it, and you can’t help but smile again

You will always take your girlfriend kissing your wounds better

Stroking her hair and relaxing against the pillows, you feel her teeth gently sink into the skin around the bruise

Never too much, nor too deep

Just right

Just enough for your skin to tingle and throb a little

You whisper a little, speaking of what happened

And she listens, only occasionally hums against your skin or presses kisses to it

Soon, you feel your hip calm again, instead she moves on top of you

“Want me to kiss it better some more?”, she asks, a sly grin forming at her lips

How could you refuse?

[dekusleftsock]

I think that there’s a fundamental misunderstanding of what exactly is…happening with Izuku’s character. Specifically in regards to chapter 425.

I’m glad that a lot more people generally recognize that Izuku is not a character that can be read at a surface level, given that he’s both a repressed person with built up emotion of basically everything and also a very glaringly HUGELY unreliable narrator, but that doesn’t necessarily mean I agree with the ways I’ve seen this most recent chapter spoken about.

I see posts, comments, etc with ideas like “Izuku don’t suppress your emotions! Open up with people! It’ll be okay I promise!” When that’s fundamentally not what is happening here.

There’s always always ALWAYS been a distinct difference in character throughout horikoshi’s writing when he is showing that a character is:

A—Avoiding emotions, thoughts, ideas less than ideal for them. Not opening up when they probably should about their problems given that they’ve been handed the space to do so. Just genuinely not acknowledging, feeling, or expressing emotions that they don’t want.

B—Reflecting on the ways they feel about the world, themselves, or other people given their new perspective on a situation. Not outright reaching out to others to talk about these problems/feelings, but instead waiting until the moment they feel they have the most confidence to do so with their new outlook on their own life.

And genuinely, guys, to grab your BkDk attention rn, this is the exact reason why Ochako’s reflection on her feelings for Izuku and thereafter decision to pull away from them WAS NEVER GOING TO END IN OCHAKO EXPLODING WITH HER LOVE FOR HIM.

This was another common interpretation I saw of Ochako and Izuocha for a long time. That because she pushed these feelings away, they were somehow going to explode in this unbelievable way and she would “get the boy” because of it. That her arc would surround accepting her romantic feelings and that she can’t just push away how she feels for a career.

But yk. That didn’t happen. At all. Nowhere close even.

The same kind of goes for Katsuki, allmight, etc. They all had moments in their arc where it was spent genuinely reflecting, and the only reason we as the audience never connected it in the same ways we do ochako or Izuku was ALWAYS BECAUSE the narrative showed their inner thoughts while doing so (mostly because Allmight’s arc after losing OFA and Katsuki’s arc on what it means to be a hero were so intrinsically tied, both starting at the same time and ending at the same time during the final war. And because they were so tied this caused their own reflections, development, and thought process to be broadcasted to us frequently throughout their arcs… to each other. They also somewhat shared aspects with Izuku, but these were cherry picked more often than not, like dvk2 for example).

To us Katsuki never seemed to be.. idk, suppressing his anger in any way because we were always told what he was doing and why (side note: this is why I’ve always thought arguments against Katsuki were so weird, bc unlike characters like endeavor or Ochako he wasn’t like… hiding who he was and how he was changing. Ever. Like the audience knows at all times past basically season 3 what Katsuki is thinking and doing. Like how do you watch this happen, stare me dead in the eye, and tell me how much of a terrible and awful teenage boy he is. Like damn I didn’t think we were this dumb. This is also my theory as to why he’s most popular, his arc is very… in your face if that makes sense). Katsuki’s entire mini arc on reflecting his mistakes and his childhood and his future is spent TELLING YOU that it’s what he’s doing. (I’m referring mostly to the endeavor internship arc, the provisional license exam makeup, and basically everything in the war arc related to him leading up to bakugou Katsuki rising here)

And see, Horikoshi will stare you dead in the eye, tell you “this girl has taken into consideration that she doesn’t want to waste her time training her career focusing on a boy because he kinda caught her fancy”, and y’all will still say that this will explode in her face.

Y’all this is a series about learning how to manage emotions, maturity in relationship to one’s emotions, how to feel an emotion, but in a way that is helpful. Horikoshi isn’t telling you “go buck wild, feel everything all the time and always express it”, in fact he explores why you DONT do that! Through Toga or Shigaraki, they show how grief and anger can genuinely consume you. But he also shows why you shouldn’t just put everything in a box to never look at or acknowledge, or why you shouldn’t just let your grief destroy the world around you, or pretending that some emotions simply don’t exist.

I can’t say this enough, so let me say it now, mha is about the extremes of your psyche. That you should control something, but not too much. Everything can be harmful. Everything can be good.

Izuku is not controlling too much, he’s expressing just enough.

I LOVE shaming this dickhead at all times in all my posts. I love saying he’s an ignorant dipshit with a weird amount of distaste for a girl who just confessed to him. I’ve joked that chapter 348 is basically an entire chapter spent on Izuku calling Himiko a mean dyke. And yet I also believe he’s doing nothing WRONG here.

In fact, I’ll even say that this moment right here?

ISNT EVEN IZUKU DOING THE SOCIALLY APPROPRIATE THING ABOUT IT! But he’s still TRYING to reach out to someone he thinks MIGHT be able to understand. (And frankly, this moment is far deeper than what it’s being made out to be, to me it reads more like an unrequited friendship that Izuku both desires and has thought of them to have, while simultaneously showing the distance Ochako has successfully wedged between them for her own sake. Maybe it was always there though, maybe in weird, miscommunicated Horikoshi fashion, this is a representation of how Ochako always read all those “fun friend hangouts” as a little more than that, and without those feelings the friendship never really held any substance to her in the first place. Where Izuku saw his first real friend at UA, she saw little more than acquaintance)

Simultaneously, Izuku is genuinely reflecting on what it means for the world to change, to be a hero, to live after loss—and trying and failing to gain the connection he desires from individuals who can not and will not afford him that.

Izuku is ready for the world to change, a few select characters are also ready for the world to change (mirio, for example), but not nearly enough are. So maybe I’ll have to take this back if I’m proven wrong and I accidentally looked into this far past what everyone else did for no reason, but I genuinely believe with moments like this

And this

Aand this

That Izuku has come forward with that aspect of his character development. He’s reflecting on his new beliefs, not repressing his emotions for them.

[deliciouskeys]

Beware the Patient Woman (my foray into Sagelander)

This is set right after season 4. I don’t address anything beyond Sagelander. Ashley disappeared. Ryan is presumed returned to Vought Tower, maybe staying in a different room while they have to renovate Homelander’s apartment top to bottom. This is either a standalone or a chapter 1, idk. Had to get it out of my system. Rated PG cause I'm lazy/ a coward? (for now). AO3 link.

Sage may not have x-ray vision but she can tell who’s behind the door by the sound of the knock before she opens it. She didn’t have time to change out of her pajamas, but at least she was awake.

"May I come in?" he asks, peering down at her before his eyes start roving around the room.

"Of course," she says, even though she was looking forward to lying around in bed before having to put her suit on and trot out to the board meetings.

"Sorry, I know it’s early. I couldn’t really sleep last night." He walks in, almost brushing past her, arms clasped behind his back and hidden by the American flag cape billowing slightly behind him, so close that she has to lean back slightly to avoid getting an eagle beak to the face. But he didn’t mean disrespect by it, just distracted by looking all around the room.

"This was so much emptier when Maeve lived here," he remarks, stepping around various small pieces of furniture, nearly all stacked with books.

"I’m sure she needed the space to practice her combat techniques."

"Yeah or her drinking or her threesomes. I’m not sure she had the attention span to read a book in her life," he mumbles angrily, and Sage doesn’t like where this conversation is going at all. She knew there might be a downside to being given the room where Homelander’s old flame used to live.

"Did you want to discuss something?" she says, trying to keep any impatience out of her voice.

He turns around sharply to face her. "I really wanted to thank you for… everything that happened yesterday. I couldn’t even articulate how grateful I was for what you did for me."

For him, he thinks, despite her telling him point-blank that she did it to see if she could. But she was banking on his gratitude and on the high value he places on loyalty.

"You’re so very welcome. But I only did what you hired me to do," she says, cautiously, hoping this will emphasize that she may not necessarily have any interest in going beyond what she was hired to do. Maintaining boundaries with a man like this was always important.

"No, no." One of his hands emerges from behind his back to wag a finger at her. "Don’t play dumb with me. You know what I’m talking about. You did what I hired you to do, sure, but you did it even after I dismissed you. I’m not stupid, Sage. I know you could have used that brain of yours to fuck me thrice over and get revenge for how badly I treated you. I admit, I underestimated you. I did a dangerous thing, letting you go, when you were my best ally all along. So I… I know you could have made things worse for me, but you chose to side with me anyway. I was absolutely wrong about you, and it won’t happen again. I will listen to you, like I promised."

Sage hesitates. He’s saying all the right things, but these hollow promises aren’t worth much when they’ll fall to the wayside the next time he gets fed up with her. No, he’s leading up to something, and she’s wary of what might come next, so she’s not sure how she should reply to steer the conversation away.

"That’s good to hear. And no hard feelings, trust me."

Homelander nods. "Yeah, trust. I do want to ask you one thing. It’s just… I do trust you, but could I just ask you to keep me in the loop? No more lies?"

"I don’t think I ever outright lied to you," Sage answers, taking a deep breath, trying to keep her breath steady. Was this human powderkeg about to explode again? She thought she had him placated for at least a few weeks, but maybe she’s miscalculating just how paranoid he is. It's hard to feel completely calm when he's standing over her, forcing her to tilt her face upwards to meet his gaze.

"Well I’m including lying by omission," he says, but then his expression changes, softens strangely, and he steps back as if realizing that he's been looming over her. "I’m sorry, you’re misunderstanding, I didn’t come here to threaten you in any way. I just wanted to… maybe just establish best practices, going forward."

Shit, her heart rate must have spiked, finally given away that she was getting nervous. "Oh yeah, I understand. I appreciate that. Let’s discuss that."

Homelander shakes his head, wincing. "Look, I really don’t mean to dictate how you should work. I realize I’m doing it automatically. I’m catching myself telling you what to do again. I respect that you might not want to tell me everything– I do. I’ll be honest, it is a blow to the ego, and I’m not used to it, because… well you’ve seen the caliber of idiots that I've had to deal with. I’m not used to trusting someone else." 

He looks … unsure of himself? Is he genuinely apologetic? Sage is so reluctant to interpret anything he says as benign and without ulterior motives, but it’s tempting to believe him right now. She’s really at a loss for words, content to let him just keep talking and explain himself.

"So… I take back everything I said," Homelander mutters, his mouth folding even thinner as soon as he says it. "I trust you so much that I allow you to lie by omission. But if I ask you something, I’d really like a straight answer. Call it my weakness. I’m not a details guy. I’m not aspiring to look over your shoulder and micromanage your plans. But I just- I just need a little something in return for the trust. I need to be able to check in once in a while and know you won’t lie to my face."

Sage can’t believe she’s getting to watch this man wrestle with himself, threatening to spiral out while trying to define what’s important to him and what’s reasonable to ask of her. He’s debating with himself with only the barest input from her. She needs to nip this in the bud. She’s never felt that comfortable seeing him cry, and she doesn’t want things to get to that point, where she’ll have to comfort him instead of just reassuring him. "Hey listen. I love working with you. You’re giving me the opportunity of a lifetime. I’ll gladly discuss plans with you if you’re really interested in the boring details." Maybe she’s overselling it a bit, but he looks like he recovers his poise at least. 

"Anyway, that’s not even what I came here to ask you." he says, his tone sounding more like his usual self. "I wanted to invite you out for dinner. Just as a small token of appreciation- ah-ah! Nope!" he says, raising his hand as she tries to interrupt him. "Don’t say no before you hear the proposition. I found out you like sushi."

Sage’s blood runs a little cold at hearing him know something about her that she doesn’t think she ever revealed to anybody on staff at Vought.

"I located your mother and asked her a little about you over the phone last night," he says, as if guessing the question in her mind. Of course he did. He probably thinks that gives him leverage over her. Well, joke’s on him, because she hasn’t been in much contact with her mom, they haven’t gotten along since she was a teenager, and she’s not going to be manipulated by him threatening her mom. But her mom is right that she likes sushi.

"Oh yeah?" Sage asks, summoning a genuine looking smile to her face because she’s not sure how well he can tell when her mind starts running at triple speed when she’s feeling pressure. "I do love me some sushi. And I haven’t tried that many places since moving here, because it’s been so busy."

"Great!" he says, and now his smile looks genuine too, the fleeting reference to her family thankfully fading out of their conversation. "I’ve rented out this place called Masa night. You’re gonna love it. Three Michelin stars and all that. Best sushi in New York."

"Yeah, tonight works," Sage says, hoping it’s not too rude to imply that his setting her daily schedule for her is overstepping, his certainty that she’s going to love hanging out with him is overstepping. 

"Usually I wouldn’t put you through the hassle of going out, just have the chefs come to work at the Vought kitchen and host it at my place, but you know… my place is a bit of a disaster zone right now and yours… well I don’t wanna disturb your little setup you’ve got going on here."

Yes, there’s a problem she needs to solve as soon as possible brewing here. She’s very fucking glad she’s not being invited to dinner at his place. "So is there a dress code? Do I have to wear my superhero suit?"

Homelander scoffs. "I’ve rented it out. No paps, no photos. You can come in whatever you damn well please. Wear sweatpants if you want. This is all for you!" He smiles again, and it’s really genuine, and now she’s concerned that her fears are true. In his mind, this is a date.

"Just you and me?" she verifies, and when he nods she takes a deep breath and says something risky, but better now than later. "Just so you know– I don’t really do romantic relationships. I’ve slept with a couple of members of the Seven, but you don’t strike me as the kind of person who would want to get in on that action."

Homelander blinks, clearly taken aback. "It’s just dinner with a colleague," he says, but his tone is halting. "I don’t- that’s none of my business what you do in your free time with-" he licks his lips and Sage tries to guess what bothers him most about this. "Were you sleeping with A-Train? Is that how you knew?"

"No, I don’t mix work and pleasure like that." Sage can’t help but laugh a little. "I can tell you with whom. ‘No more secrets’, right? Noir and the Deep."

Sage can practically hear the wheels in Homelander’s head turning as he tries to picture it. "Huh," he says. "Well that’s uh… your prerogative certainly." Is that hurt in his voice? Maybe disbelief that she’d fuck people he considers far beneath him?

"Exactly. I assumed that someone like you would have no problem with workplace hookups," she says, shrugging. "Being part of the Seven isn’t really a normal gig. It’s so full-time, it’s your entire life. Might as well get some fun out of it."

"Yeah, makes sense," he mutters, trailing off, still thinking.

"So tonight then? What time?" she asks.

He snaps out of his thoughts. "I rented it out for the entire evening. So anytime from five onward. Up to you."

"Seven then?" she says. He nods and walks out stiffly. Sage shuts the door and leans back against it. She has to navigate this right. This overpowered manchild doesn’t have a good track record of keeping work and pleasure separate, but she can’t rebuff him in a way that insults him. She thought she was in the clear– that someone like her would never attract that kind of attention from him. She needed to be smart about this.

[weebsinstash]

You brought this on yourself. Bringing up Al and Doggy Darling.

Before the show was out(might've changed sense idk), Viv said Al used to actually have a fear of dogs but now only dislikes them. And I live for the idea of Al struggling with that a little bit.

Al with Dog Darling who he expects to be a total slob who can hardly keep focus, only for them to be neat and dedicated to doing any tasks given to them.

Al with a Dog Darling who constantly feels the need to do things for others even to their own detriment.

Al who falls for Dog Darling who acts more like a cat than a dog. Having learned to mute their reactions to things and who is 'ok' with being alone in fear of being used. With him wanting to eventually have them always with him or at his home, never wanting them to lift a finger.

I hate that my first instinct is always to swerve in the opposite direction but "what if Alastor had a dislike of dogs and he expects them to be a dumb slob" AND WHAT IF YOU ARE

Alastor: --and I always do enjoy adding a nice mirepoix to my dishes, although I suppose one of my favorites is a classic crawfish étoufée! Always reminds me of home!

Dog darling: ummmm.... I love pizza rolls and corn dogs! 😋 and mac n cheese!

Alastor and his lovably simple, lovably dim dog darling, with all the more extra nuances and caveats if you've got the soulmate trope in there (I've just really been huffing that gas lately ykwim? The, mechanism for them to feel metaphysically attached to you, their obsession kinda lowkey justified/explained by your sorta-soulbond, them feeling like they need to take care of you "because they're supposed to as your partner "). Alastor who thinks you're just so adorable but maybe just maybe cringes in secondhand embarrassment at some of the things that you do. Alastor who thinks, oh, you're actually so charming and, he sees quite the potential in you, but... he just needs to... fix you up a little bit... fine tune you... grind down some of those rougher edges to polish you up nice and pretty--

Also. Just. You know. The thematic lowkey flirting and menace in him like, saying he has to tame you/train you if you act against him. Having you in literal restraints just like he would with Husk and calling you a bad dog because you like. Snuck off to go to the club. Or hang out with friends he doesn't approve of.

I like my apples and oranges in my fiction and that means that on top of having yandere that love every part of you, I also think of yandere who meet you and think "oh no, honey, oh my gosh let me help you, I need to save you from yourself, what the fuck are you even doing here, just look at the state you're in" which, actually, I have a Velvette post deeper in my drafts I need to dig up, but. Like. Alastor falling for/getting drawn to/soulmated with a dog darling who is just kinda. Rowdy. Dare I say, a little trashy. Like idk, my mind conjures up an image of like, for a woman I guess it would be something similar to, you swear all the time, he doesn't like how you dress, he thinks you hang out with too many guys/the wrong types of guys, you may have an outright fratbro personality. Idk. You're just loud and rambunctious and he thinks you could be just the cutest little lady if he could just... give you a little coaching

But also. Cute lovable dog Darling who, obviously he's not entirely heartless but you just completely Flip His Switch with how sweet and loving you are to him, you just really make him feel soft and gooey. You could just be meeting him for the first time and be wagging your tail in excitement and holding your hand out for a handshake and you don't even mildly conceptualize he's, um, a cannibal serial killer. But then Alastor immediately realizes, oh no, honey, you can't be this sweet to people down here! The people down here are just AWFUL! They're terrible! The dregs of society! He can't let this sweet little pup meet some unfortunate accident involving some methed-out vagrants or something! Guess you'll have to be his little lap dog so he can keep a close eye on you. Meanwhile you're just like "!!!! Best friend!!! Thank you for being so nice to me, it's so scary down here and i was so lonely and scared before you came along 🥺"

Vox 🤝 Reader talking/getting rowdy during TV/media solidarity. Absolutely love the idea of Reader somehow becoming besties with Vox and Alastor is just BEYOND MAD because, he's trying to make you more sophisticated and, "bring out your true potential" and you're sneaking out to chug mountain dew baja blast and smoke weed with his arch nemesis while the two of you, like, marathon older seasons of Family Guy (also just envision your mental image of Dog Reader just like, excitedly being like, "oh! It's Vox! Vox! Vox! Hey Vox! Vox!" And trying to get his attention while he's on a jumbotron or something, basically saying his name like a bark, like, Alastor having old timey cartoon steam coming out of his ears while Vox is just obviously smitten with your adorable clueless ass because your tail is wagging and you're so excited to see your super cool TV friend 😋❤️ Alastor forced to watch you have total chemistry with Vox because you can talk about TV and video games amd Alastor is getting progressively enraged because HOW LONG have you guys been hanging out without him knowing??? And Vox didn't even know you knew Alastor he just legitimately liked your vibe

Reader being inevitably somewhat dehumanized and while he does adore you and want you all for himself it really almost sort of IS like you're a pet to him. He decides what you wear, what you eat, what you do, and most importantly, he really, really, REALLY doesn't like it when other people try and touch his dog :)

[electraslight]

What did you think of the mutation Kevin arc in season three of alien force?

I liked a lot of aspects of it. I think it was a good decision to remind people that Kevin has issues beyond being a con man, because season one and two of alien force, while I love them, very much erased kevins long history of mental illness, addiction, and violence, as well as honestly not giving him much of an arc. Plus I think the mutation was a really good way to explore how kevin actually feels about being mutated when not being corrupted. It was a great concept! I just feel like a lot of things around it were flawed. First, I don't like the decision to make a 16 year old boy wear that little clothing for a whole series. Yes, I know he's supposed to look like metamorpho man, but then you think about charmcaster grooming him and that really strange bit in trade off where they tried to imply that the energy transfer was a rape allegory- not a good time to have him almost naked. Second, gwen and ben were AWFUL to him. Gwevin fans idk how you can just gloss over how many times she outright states he's hideous when, let's be real, he's a pretty, muscular boy who's only abnormality is that he's carved out of materials. Ben sucks in general and everyone knows that but no one talks about how much gwen sucked too. I think the resolution was pretty dumb too. Why did destroying the omnitrix affect anything about Kevin's mutation? It wasn't attached to him or constantly feeding him energy, so realistically he would have dropped the transformation within a few days. Dumb shit. You can really notice the change in quality from s1 and 2 and s3. But kevins my waifu and I'll never complain about getting more of him,so I digress. Here's a dumb screenshot redraw, thanks for listening to my rant.

[prettyboykatsuki]

a character that is just. so dumb but in a specific way. not kind hearted necessarily just outright stupid and somehow a little bit self absorbed. insecure about some aspect of their life. hates losing. like truly a simpleton and would be a jackass if there was any mal intent to their actions but they're usually just that dumb. ive never seen it in traditional het comics. but its in bll all the time and its everything to me. like just a pure outright simpleton. gives me a boner idk

[bri-cheeses]

Jerseys vs. Hoodies - Part 4

| Rosekiller microfic | Word count: 524 | Part 3 can be found here |

-

“He’s going to get us back for that one, isn’t he?” Barty asks, staring after the place Regulus had been not two seconds before.

Evan sighs, slumping in his seat a bit, and taps his quill against the edge of the table. “Yeah, probably.”

“Lovely. Anyways, Ev,” Barty moves on easily, turning back to face him, “what did Reg mean by all that?”

Evan closes his eyes and wishes to disappear. He had hoped Barty would just brush it off, but no, Evan wasn’t that lucky.

He plays dumb instead. “Mean by what?”

“By “everything going on” between us and “dancing around each other” and all of that stuff,” Barty explains, reaching out to grab Evan’s quill and steal it away. Evan glares at him.

“That was blatant thievery,” he says, then thinks with just a touch of desperation, Please, for the love of all that is good, just let me change the subject.

“Thievery, yes, but there are no witnesses. It’s just your word against mine.”

And for a second, Evan thinks that his wish has been granted. Then Barty points the quill at him accusingly and says, “And don’t think that I’ll let Reg’s comment go that easily.”

Evan wants to die.

“I don’t know what he meant,” he says flatly.

He plucks the quill out of Barty’s hand and turns back towards the table, avoiding Barty’s gaze and trying to go back to his essay. But from the corner of his eye, he can see Barty carefully evaluating him. He’s barely moved from the position he was in when Evan took the quill back for himself.

“You’re lying,” Barty finally pronounces.

Evan sighs in frustration and drops the stupid quill.

“What do you want me to say?”

“Just tell me what Reg meant!” Barty exclaims. “And don’t try to lie to me about it.”

Evan narrows his eyes at him. “You’re entirely too stubborn.”

Barty just smiles. “You love it,” he says.

And oh, isn’t that just the problem?

Evan ignores the comment, though, instead thinking about how he can twist this to omit the truth while also not outright lying.

“Reg knows about our whole… situation,” Evan begins, gesturing between them.

A smirk crosses Barty’s face. “Yeah, I figured, considering the whole “bedroom eyes” comment. It’s not like we’ve been subtle about it.”

“Yeah,” Evan says, a bit distractedly. “Also, I told him.”

Barty makes a face. “Why?”

“Just… don’t worry about it.”

“I’m gonna worry about it.”

Would Madam Pince be mad if he started banging his head against the table? The answering yes in his mind is just about the only thing that stops him from doing exactly that.

“I’ll get there! Just calm down first, okay?”

“Fine,” Barty grumbles.

Maybe he should just tell him. Tell Barty the real reason why he’s wearing his sweatshirt. Why he had agreed to this whole arrangement in the first place. Why he smiles whenever Barty kisses him, why he always looks at Barty with a certain softness in his eyes, why their friends make comments about the two of them.

Maybe he should just tell him.

-

(Part 5 will come out sometime this week but I happen to have finals so idk when)