#or about how common it is to discuss weight and weight loss

[metanarrates]

I genuinely feel like an alien compared to my coworkers when they try to chat with me about things like dating and weight loss. like what are you SAYING about "oh you know it's just so hard to make your man understand the instructions you give him?" why are you trying to connect with me by complaining that you gained 15 pounds? is this how most people form connections in the workplace? i for real do not get it

[penvisions]

there's a place and time {joel miller x reader}

Pairing: Younger / No-outbreak! Joel Miller x Neighbor! Reader

Summary: Moving back to your parents house wasn't part of the plan, neither was being a thorn in your neighbor's side. but you roll with the punches, and hey, he's kinda cute when he gets huffy.

Word Count: 3.1k

Warnings: age gap (joel is mid 30's / reader is mid 20's), angst, biting words, argumentative language, joel is a lil meanie but so is reader, grief, off-screen loss, depictions of depression, comfort, mushy stuff

A/N: this literally came out of nowhere, a random thought on the way to work and then a manic two hours of writing once i got home. this turned out a little different than first imagined, but i hope it reads well!

navigation || joel miller masterlist || main masterlist || ko-fi

“Why don’t you date?”

“Excuse me?” The form crouched in between kitchen counters looked up at you with a raised brow, surely mishearing the question.

“Dating, I know you know what that is.” You repeat yourself as you push your arms back to brace on the counter and hop up on it. The granite of it is cold on your bare thighs, the shorts you were wearing thrown on haphazardly when a panic stricken pair of teenagers had begun to bang on your door in the early afternoon. The words of ‘fire’ and “help!” spurring you into action where you had been napping on your couch. Now though, the oven was off, the blackened frozen pizza still on the rack and covered in foam from the fire extinguisher neither of them had known how to use. Their father had sent them upstairs, thanking you for helping them out and getting it taken care of. “Or the concept at least, yeah?”

“Don’t mean it’s any of your business, little lady.” Joel’s voice leaves no room for further conversation as he realizes you’re more serious than need be. Little quips between you two common, the unspoken understanding of not discussing the reason for your presence in the neighborhood mutual.

“I dunno, I remember you being real keen on the idea of me babysitting.” You take a sip of your soda, swiped from the fridge after everything had calmed down. “Would do you a favor now, should you need the night off for some…fun.”

“Dating and fun are two different things.”

“Dating can be fun, if you do it with the right person.”

“Yeah, and what do you know about that? Saw you move in all by your lonesome. No big, burly man helping you with your boxes.”

The fizzy drink sours on your tongue and you toss him a scowl as he stands. He’s a few feet away but you can feel the warmth of him as he stands at his full height. He’s reaching to close the oven door, the creak of metal on metal loud in the beat of silence.

“You wouldn’t know fun if it bit you on your perky ass, Miller.”

“Language, you’re in my house.” His brow furrows and he pins you with a stern look. Something you’d seen him give to his brother, his girls, the neighbor across the way when she wouldn’t take the hint that he didn’t want her dog shit in his yard.

“Old men like yourself deserve to have some fun every once in a while. They deserve happiness too.”

“Even if I did, it’s no concern of yours. Your daddy didn’t help pay for two degrees for you to end up babysitting for grocery money.”

The rebuttal on the tip of your tongue suddenly dissolved as you felt a shiver run down your spine. He’s right, you know he’s right. But you just…you couldn’t even open the envelope with the certificates let alone add them to your resume and begin the arduous task of job hunting.

“Fuck you, I was only offering to help out a neighbor.” The words are rough, rounded out with the weight of too many emotions. You shove off from the counter, abandoning your half-finished drink. A delicacy you enjoyed only over at his house, too expensive for you to indulge in as bills you never anticipated paying became your responsibility.

“I didn’t mean-“ He had the self-awareness to realize he said the wrong thing. His hands coming up from his waist to reach out for you, but you don’t look over your shoulder as you make your way through the kitchen.

“Don’t come to me if you do need someone to look after the girls. I wouldn’t take your money anyway.”

“C’mon now,” His full lips shape around your name, but you’re already out the door. Resisting the urge to let it slam shut behind you, your anger still so sharp and hot. But the girls didn’t deserve to feel it, even the echo of it in the slamming of a door. Despite being a dick, Joel was a good father to them. He’d made his home a nurturing and loving environment. You didn’t want to taint it with your stained hands.

As he stands there in his empty kitchen, the smell of burnt dough, smoke, and ammonia dizzies him as he watches you cross over his yard to yours next door. The blank expression on your face and the faint smears of dried pant all over your legs makes him regret his fast words. He had been going for teasing, but of course they had come out harsh and wounding.

You were someone he didn’t know how to interact with. So sweet and polite with the girls, with the neighbors. But you were a firecracker with him. Teasing, whipping words that rung around his head, and he recalled far too often. The little smirk that pulled at your lips as you said them, waited for his response or sputtering lack of one. His own pulled from him, making him feel like a teenager again, like a young man you hadn’t been suddenly left alone to raise a child. Like his old self, someone who stood a chance with you as you gave him your attention time and time again.

He had only ever met you through the words of your parents, the people who had once occupied the house beside his own. He had moved in with two six-year-olds just as you had shoved off to college upstate. The running joke was that it was perfect timing for him to have missed out on the perfect babysitter.

-

Graduation is supposed to be a time of celebration and proud smiles, at least that’s what everyone else got. The day you had counted down on the calendar and crossed off the passing ones as it neared was now a blur of too bright colors and phone calls with people telling you things you didn’t want to think about, let alone hear as your new reality.

A car accident, on the drive upstate. Both parents, reckless driver.

A house that had been recently paid off, left to you. Your name already on the deed, something you didn’t want to think about too hard. Close, you had been close with each of them and them as a unit. A small family but understanding. It was yours, the backdrop to your life and suddenly the two people were only memories.

The move had been quick, the apartment you shared with fellow graduate students mostly books and a beautiful desk. The bedframe taken apart to go while the shelves had been left for the next occupants.

You hadn’t shared the news with any of your roommates or friends, not wanting to taint their own celebrations and happy memories of the day you all worked so hard for. Addresses were exchanged, well wishes were meant, but of course it all faded as time had gone on. Their news of job offers and exciting dates had been good to hear, but with no good things to respond with of your own, it was hard to feel the same way about them as you once had. They reached out, worry coloring their words, which made you feel even worse.

It haunts you for days, as you seal yourself into the home that is now yours alone. The paint slathered on canvas dries and the brushes coated in it turn into hardened caps over the bristles. You’re allowing things to sit for too long, the water evaporating in the cups you use to rinse between swatches of color. The open paint tubes oxidizing and becoming unsalvageable. But you have no control.

The bed becomes damp with nights of sweat, from your tossing and turning body as the heat rises and the air conditioning that needs to be repaired is just another phone call. You don’t even think you know where your phone is. It can’t bear bad news if you don’t answer it. It can’t carry the end of your world if you don’t let it.

There’s a sharp knock on the door at some point, in the midst of the haze of days after storming out of Joel’s kitchen. You hadn’t been able to dissect the sounds of life going on outside your closed windows.

But it had, to the point where now someone was calling on you to make you return to it.

Shrugging on a robe, you hold it tight to your aching body as you push up from the bed. Bare feet sticking to the hardwood floor as the heat fills the home.

“What?” You can’t help but bark as you swing the door open, only to find a concerned Joel on the porch, with your phone in his hand.

“I found this in the kitchen, must’ve fallen off the counter in the madness of getting the fire out and callin’ me.” He holds it out to you, but you don’t move to take it. “Figured you needed it, there’s a lot of missed calls and voicemails. I may have left a few too, to check on ya. Haven’t seen you in a few days.”

“Been here, painting.”

“Okay, that’s…that’s good. Got everything you need? Food, water, someone comin’ to fix the A/C?” It’s an apology in the only way Joel Miller is capable of giving, the need to make sure someone is getting what they need, that they’re taken care of. He’s a good provider, to his girls, to his brother, to the neighborhood when he’s not beat down from long days in the sun with concrete and paint dried to his skin, with wood shavings and stain splotched on his jeans.

“No.”

“No?”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m my own person.”

Your name leaves his mouth on a sigh.

“I know that, but your parents…I know that kinda thing is-“

“I’m fine. Thanks for returning this.” You snatch it from his hand and go to close to door, not willing to hear what he has to say on the loss of your parents. For his credit, he let’s you. Knowing that you’re going through the motions, through the event in your own way. It doesn’t stop him from speaking loud enough for you to hear him through the door.

“The girls will be by with dinner later! Try to be nice to them, they ain’t me!”

-

The meal delivered by two smiling teenagers does lift your spirits a bit, even if all you do is shower and do a few loads of laundry. It’s a long process, the climb out of the hole that you had found yourself in.

Days turn into weeks, weeks turn into months. You’re back to quipping across the yard with the man. His daughters delighting in the comraderies that underlies it all. It’s the height of summer now, the girls spending time with you to try their hand at painting. Sarah is better with bursts of color that compliment each other, vaguely floral. While Ellie is better with a muted palette imposed between detailed line art.

They always thank you for the time and attention, offering to help you clean up or tidy the house in exchange for watching over them when you notice Joel’s truck is still gone from their own driveway until late. They aren’t helpless, but you know what loneliness feels like and you don’t want them to become familiar with it.

You finally open the envelope containing your degrees, the last letters from your friends and pen down long responses. The stamps cute as you drop them off at the post office, the ornate certificates framed and hung above the desk in your father’s old office alongside his own.

Joel joins them most days, mid meal if he can make it in time. Food finding it’s way into your kitchen, something you’re sure is the combined effort of two pairs of small hands and one pair of big hands. The least you could do is turn it into something for everyone involved to enjoy.

But just as things seem to progress, they fall back apart. It wasn’t over a throwaway comment this time, though, but a piece of mail delivered from a local gallery asking after your willingness to partake in an exhibit. That they expressed their deepest condolences in this trying time.

The paint dries up again, another set of brushes left to ruin. The door goes unanswered, as does the phone you can hardly stand to look at. The lights don’t glow in the windows once the sun sets, no music is heard from behind thin screens, nor the sound of you humming along to it.

The house becomes a burden once again, shielding you from the world you as you feel the loss of your parents all over again.

-

You don’t hear the door open from where you’re sprawled on the floor of the bathroom, the shower is running but you didn’t make it under the spray. You’re fully clothed, having reached down underneath the vanity for a bottle of shampoo when your fingers had brushed over something else. A bottle of your mother’s favorite perfume. The one that lingered in every room she occupied, on every piece of clothing she adorned. It was her, the perfect encapsulation of who she was.

And it was staring at you inconspicuously from the shelf. The mere sight of it tearing the wound open once again and making it hard to breath.

That’s where Joel finds you. In tears over something as trivial as a tiny glass bottle. But he doesn’t bat an eye, he’s taking in the scene and shutting off the shower in a few easy steps.

“Hey now, come ‘ere, darlin’,” He’s crouching down beside you, hands reaching for your shaking body.

He’s so gentle, so soft as he pulls you up from the tiled floor and into his chest. Leaning back against rhe now closed vanity to support your weight. One hand on the back of your head, holding it to his chest, pleading with you to match his breathing so you don’t hurt yourself.

“Datin’ is hard, you’re right.” His words make you pause, confusion crowding out the wetness lingering in your eyes. The words from a conversation long ago pulling you out of your breakdown, the casual way he continues it.

“It is.” You insist, voice small and muffled as you refuse to pull your face from where it’s pressed against the warmth of his chest.

“Maybe…. maybe you’d be kind enough to try it with this grumpy old man. I’d sure like to give it a shot with someone like you.”

“I ain’t nothin’ special. Just the neighbor girl your dead friends talked about too much.”

“They loved you, darlin’. With everythin’ they had.” He holds tight to the hand you move underneath one of his. Seeking him out, to feel his skin on your own. “You are special, those paintings they showed me, you got a gift, honey.”

“Gifts don’t mean nothin’ when you got no one to share them with.”

“You share ‘em with the girls, they loved coming over here to spend time with you. Share ‘em with me, if you want. The girls and I are in your corner, we got you.”

“You don’t…you don’t want to date me. Every boy-“

“Boys don’t know how to date, that’s only something us old men know how to do. Will you let me show you, how it feels to be taken care of and looked after? To feel appreciated and like you aren’t a hindrance on nightly plans to play fuckin’ video games?”

“I like video games,” You sniffle, voice gaining strength as the conversation goes on. He’s soothing you, even as he just sits on the floor with you in his lap, his arms around you and your body pressed up against him. It’s the most comfortable you’ve felt in months. And it’s just Joel being Joel, it’s just you being you.

“Show me, if you want. Let me get to know you, let me show you what it’s like to be loved, not just sought after for a night of fun.”

“I don’t date old men.”

“No?”

“You’re not that much older than me, so I wouldn’t really call you old.”

“Cause then you’d have to admit you’re old too, huh?” He reads the meaning behind the change of thought, as if he was in your head right there alongside you.

“Yeah, we ain’t old. Life just beat us down, but damn if it didn’t touch your perky ass.” You reach a hand down from where it’s cradled between your chests, to pinch at where his backside it firmly planted on the floor. He jolts a bit, not expecting the action. But his rumbling laugh lightens the air around you both even more so.

“You goin’ soft on me, a compliment like that is makin’ my heart pick up. Can you feel it?”

“Yeah, cause you’re a big ole sap.” You can’t help the breathy chuckle that escapes past your lips, the twitch of a smile trying to break out. You can, indeed, feel the way his heart is thudding in his chest. The truth of your words and his making you feel some of the weight lift from your own.

“You ain’t gotta clue how sappy I could me, lemme show you, huh?”

“Only if you promise it’ll make me roll my eyes and groan.” You lean back enough to see his face, the roll of your eyes up to take in his hopeful expression allowing you to know how much he means it. Your own heartbeat picks up and you swear he can feel it too, if the crook of his lips underneath his mustache is any indication.

“Only if you promise to have a smile on your face while you do it.” He leans in, nose brushing against yours. The action so soft, so welcome after the isolation you had subjected yourself to.

“Deal.” You breathe out against his lips.

“It’s a deal then.” He presses them to yours, and damn it all, but it does bring a smile to your face.

taglist: @sawymredfox @tuquoquebrute @littlemisspascal @hiddenbabynyc @jessthebaker

@joelsgreys @tonysopranosrobe @morallyinept

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

wait, what's the difference between hpv and hiv and aids? i thought hiv was just aids and hpv was like. another term for hiv please 😭

okay. before I do this. I do want to remind everyone that this kind of info is incredibly easy to seek for yourself, with the help of simple search times like "what is hpv" or "hiv wikipedia," and I do really encourage doing that! learning how to seek out information is an important skill!

but god I am going to do this anyway, here we go.

HPV is human papillomavirus, an extremely common viral infection that virtually every sexually active person will contract at some point in their life. there are nearly 200 stains of HPV, nearly all of which are harmless, but there are 2 that can (but don't always) cause genital warts and 13 that can (but don't always) cause cancers of the cervix, anus, vagina, vulva, penis, and throat. roughly 90% of cases of HPV clear up and go away on their own within two years of contraction without ever causing any health problems; the majority of people who have it will be asymptomatic the entire time and may never know they have it.

HIV is human immunodeficiency virus, a virus that attacks and drastically weakens the immune system when untreated. it is considered an STI but is not spread exclusively through sexual contact, as it can also be transmitted via unclean syringes shared between people as well as from parents to children via childbirth or breastfeeding. while HIV can be fatal, usually when it develops into AIDS, as I posted about earlier tonight proper medicine and management can allow people with HIV can live full, healthy lives and even completely negate their risk of transmitting HIV.

it's also important to discuss PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis), which can be taken by people who do not have HIV to drastically reduce their risk of contracting it, and PEP (post-exposure prophylaxis) which can be taken for 28 days starting up to 72 hours after potential exposure to HIV to greatly reduce the risk of the virus taking hold.

AIDS is acquired immunodeficiency syndrome. AIDS develops when HIV is left untreated and progresses over years, when the immune system has been severely depleted. at this point people are very prone to what are known as "opportunistic" infections and cancers, further health complications that their immune system is unable to fight off as it ordinarily would. people with AIDS often deal with a state of constant fatigue, fever, chills, weakness, inflammation, and weight loss.

so, you know. slightly different things!

[anachronistica]

Put the work in.

i think it’s important when submissive and traditional women are unmarried to be constantly working on themselves. I feel the same way about Dominant and traditional men. Even though we are single, we should all be putting in the effort to learn to become the best partners for our dynamics as we can.

While I am no longer single, I mentor, coach and help many friends who are single in this lifestyle. These are my recommendations of why to continuously be learning and growing as a Dom or a sub while single, both sfw and nsfw.

Things a sub can/should do to prepare for a future Dom-

learn to cook and to set a proper table

learn to communicate in a polite, constructive way with no dramatic or abrasive tones

get into a good routine with cleaning and know how to clean / stain remove / disinfect all types of surfaces

have a decent wardrobe for casual, semi formal and formal attire

work on any weight loss or gain / appearance / health related (mental and physical) issues to keep yourself healthy

read up about common dynamic rules, expectations, day in the lifes, etc. to see what you like and don’t like (as well as collars, contracts, etc.)

learn to budget , grocery shop, meal prep / plan, learn block schedules techniques

do basic research on gardening, canning, food preservation / storage.

have strong knowledge of Dom/sub sexuality, kink, and common expectations

most importantly - find your limits and your dealbreakers on what you do and do not in a partner and both sexually and dynamic-wise. Make notes. Know what you need before you start vetting.

What Doms could do to prepare for a future sub-

be fully educated on the lifestyle, Domestic discipline, Trad living, consent, freeuse, contracts, types of commitment collars, all of it

have rough outline of expectations, rules, routines, future goals for what they would and would not expect from a sub (that can be eventually tailored to your specific dynamic)

Know their preferred methods of domestic discipline to use

work on their career, securing a decent career and stability

build up all savings accounts and investments

secure a decent place to live / buy a home with the thought in mind of having a private space for discipline to be conducted

have solid formed opinions about common topics brought up during vetting and lifestyle discussions

know their kinks and sexual expectations but don’t be gross about it when presenting it

Anything you would add or subtract?

[diekleinesuesse]

Being in a Relationship with Sebastian Sallow: A Love Marked by Passion and Darkness

Being in a relationship with Sebastian Sallow would be a whirlwind of intensity, devotion, and moral dilemmas. His charm and wit would make him an alluring partner, but beneath his confident exterior lies a troubled soul grappling with loss, revenge, and the temptations of dark magic. Loving Sebastian means embracing both his light and his darkness, walking beside him as he navigates the fine line between hero and anti-hero.

Undeniable Chemistry and Deep Conversations

From the moment you grow close to Sebastian, there’s an undeniable spark between you. His mischievous smirk, sharp mind, and roguish charm would make him impossible to ignore. Conversations with him would never be dull whether you’re debating magical theory in the library, trading witty remarks in the common room, or discussing the future under the starlit sky in the Astronomy Tower. He would challenge you, encourage you, and make you question everything you thought you knew about magic and morality.

He wouldn’t just be a boyfriend; he would be a confidant, someone you could share your deepest thoughts with. As the relationship progresses, Sebastian would open up about his pain his desperation to save his sister, his anger at the world’s injustices, and his fears about what he might become. In return, he would want to know everything about you, from your greatest ambitions to your most hidden fears.

Fiercely Loyal and Protective

Sebastian’s devotion to those he loves is unwavering, and being in a relationship with him means having someone who will always have your back. Whether it’s standing up for you in front of classmates, helping you perfect your dueling skills, or throwing himself in harm’s way to protect you, his loyalty knows no bounds.

However, his protectiveness may sometimes verge on obsession. He sees the world in a stark contrast of allies and enemies, and if he ever perceived someone as a threat to you, he wouldn’t hesitate to act even if it meant breaking the rules or using questionable magic. You might find yourself having to remind him that not every battle needs to be fought, and not every problem can be solved with force.

The Temptation of Dark Magic

One of the biggest challenges in a relationship with Sebastian would be his growing fascination with dark magic. He sees it as a means to an end, a way to protect and heal the people he loves. His willingness to push boundaries could lead to heated arguments between you, especially if you don’t share his views.

Would you support him in his pursuit of power, or try to guide him toward a different path? The choices you make in your relationship would shape his journey, and depending on how you approach things, he might either listen to you or push you away.

Moments of Light Amidst the Darkness

Despite the struggles, there would be countless moments of happiness. Secret rendezvous in the Forbidden Forest, stolen kisses in the halls of Hogwarts, playful duels in the Undercroft Sebastian would make sure your time together was filled with adventure and excitement. His love language would likely be acts of service, always looking for ways to make your life easier, whether by sneaking you extra potion ingredients or staying up late to help you with an assignment.

On days when the weight of the world felt too heavy, he would find solace in your presence. You would be the one person who could pull him away from his obsessions, even if just for a little while. Whether it’s lying together in the grass, watching the sky shift colors, or simply enjoying the quiet of the library, these moments of peace would be a reminder that there’s more to life than revenge and dark magic.

A Love That’s Both Beautiful and Tragic

Loving Sebastian Sallow means accepting all parts of him the charm, the devotion, the stubbornness, and the darkness. Your relationship would be one of passion and challenges, of late-night whispers and tearful confrontations. There would be times when you question whether you can truly save him from himself, and other times when you feel like you’re the only thing keeping him grounded.

But if you choose to stand by his side, you would experience a love unlike any other. A love filled with fire and shadows, with laughter and pain, with loyalty that burns brighter than any spell. And in the end, whether you walk the path of light or darkness together, one thing is certain: Sebastian Sallow would love you with every fiber of his being, for better or for worse.

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Hello! Currently im working on my story and I need to write my character Fainting/falling unconscious and I need help with writing that. General things I would like to know is how long would someone be out cold in which situations and what are some aftermaths. You can (and please do) add extra info. I dont see alot of posts covering this topic so I would request this :>

Hi! I have these previous posts: On Fainting ⚜ Some Reactions

Some Additional Notes

Faintness

‘Light- headedness’.

Seen in anaemia, low BP, postural hypotension, hypoglycaemia, carotid sinus hypersensitivity, epilepsy

Syncope

This is sudden loss of consciousness over seconds.

Another word for fainting or passing out.

Think of abnormal ‘electrical’ activity in the central nervous system or a temporary drop in cardiac output and BP that improves as soon as the patient is in a prone position.

Fits can occur due to a profound fall in BP so they are not specific of epilepsy.

Someone is considered to have syncope if they become unconscious and go limp, then soon recover.

For most people, syncope occurs once in a great while, if ever, and is not a sign of serious illness.

However in others, syncope can be the first and only warning sign prior to an episode of sudden cardiac death.

Syncope can also lead to serious injury.

Talk to your physician if syncope happens more often.

Pre-syncope - is the feeling that you are about to faint.

Someone with pre-syncope may be:

lightheaded (dizzy) or nauseated,

have a visual "gray out" or trouble hearing,

have palpitations, or

feel weak or suddenly sweaty.

When discussing syncope with your doctor, you should note episodes of pre-syncope as well.

Becoming unconscious due to a seizure, heart attack, head injury, stroke, intoxication, blow to the head, diabetic hypoglycemia or other emergency condition is not considered syncope.

WHAT TO DO

Someone who faints should be moved so they are lying down to allow blood to flow to the brain.

If they do not regain consciousness promptly, start CPR.

Reflex syncope - the result of a reflex response to some trigger, in which the heart slows or blood vessels dilate (widen).

This causes blood pressure to drop, so less blood flows to the brain and fainting (syncope) or near-fainting (pre-syncope) occurs.

Reflex syncope is the most frequent cause of fainting.

Vasovagal syncope — the common faint — occurs in one third of the population.

It is by far the most common form of reflex syncope.

Often triggered by a combination of dehydration and upright posture.

But it can also have an emotional trigger such as seeing blood ("fainting at the sight of blood").

Some Vasovagal Syncope Triggers

Seeing blood (not considered a serious symptom)

Getting an injection or having blood drawn (not considered serious)

Standing up quickly (a "head rush" is considered pre-syncope)

Standing upright for a long time

Sudden and unexpected trauma, stress or pain, such as being hit

Blood donation

Other types of reflex syncope include:

Situational syncope - a sudden reflex response to a trigger other than those listed above. Triggers include:

Coughing, sneezing, laughing, swallowing

Pressure on the chest after exertion or exercise

Defecating

Urinating (post-micturition syncope: occurs in men while standing to urinate)

Eating a meal

Sudden abdominal pain

Blowing a brass instrument or lifting weights

Carotid Sinus Syncope - a response in older adults that occurs when pressure is applied to the carotid artery in the neck. A hard twist of the neck, wearing a tight collar and pressing on the artery are triggers for carotid sinus syncope.

How is syncope treated? The treatment for syncope will depend upon the underlying condition but may include:

Catheter ablation: procedure to cauterize the specific heart cells that cause abnormal heart rhythms

Pacemakers: device inserted under the skin below the collarbone to deliver regular electrical pulses through thin, highly durable wires attached to the heart; used to treat bradycardia, heart block and some types of heart failure

Implantable cardioverter-defibrillators (ICDs): a small implanted device that delivers an electrical pulse to the heart to reset a dangerously irregular heartbeat; often used to treat ventricular tachycardia or heart failure

Avoiding known triggers

Vasovagal Attack

Simple faint precipated by emotion, pain, fear, prolonged standing, etc.

Suggested by: syncope within seconds or minutes of preceding precipitant.

Nausea,

sweating, and

darkening of vision.

Recovery within minutes.

No incontinence.

Confirmed by: history. No abnormal physical signs.

Finalized by: the predictable outcome of management, e.g. reassurance and advice regarding avoidance of preciptating causes.

Cough Syncope

Suggested by: sudden loss of consciousness after severe bout of coughing.

Confirmed by: history. Normal examination.

Finalized by: the predictable outcome of management, e.g. treating cause of cough.

Panic Disorder

Suggested by: Intense feeling of apprehension or impending disaster.

Developing quickly and unexpectedly without a recognizable trigger.

Shortness of breath and

sensation of smothering, nausea, abdominal pain, depersonalization and derealization,

choking,

numbness,

tingling,

palpitations,

flushes,

trembling,

shaking, chest discomfort,

fear of dying,

sweating,

dizziness,

faintness.

Confirmed by: recognized criteria, e.g. the ICD.

Finalized by: the predictable outcome of management, e.g. reassurance about nature of symptoms, cognitive behaviour therapy, anxiolytics (e.g. diazepam), or antidepressants (e.g. SSRIs).

Sources: 1 2 3 ⚜ More: Notes & References ⚜ On Hemophobia

Hope this helps with your writing!

[ghoulfuckersincorporated]

I've got female Sole Survivor on the brain thanks to this Deegan one-shot, especially in relation to her grief at all she's lost at the beginning of the game. This may be a touch controversial.

I see a ton of female Soles (both in fan works as well as in general discussions about lore, roleplay, etc.) who are wracked with survivor's guilt in the aftermath, wrought entirely hollow by the loss of their husband and child. This is not a statement of judgement or me implying that it's a subpar creative choice; it's a very natural conclusion to draw. Losing your entire immediate family, on top of surviving multiple mass-casualty events, would naturally leave you wondering why you lived when others didn't and feeling incomplete without those dearest to you.

Personally, the first time I played Fallout 4, I immediately imagined my own Sole as a woman dealing with an immense amount of guilt for an entirely different reason: she feels relief on more levels than one.

Yes, the world ended and everyone she ever knew or really cared for is long dead. But even the horror of that realization doesn't change the fact that there is a massive weight lifted off of her shoulders when she wakes up in that Vault and realizes that she no longer has to be a wife or mother every single moment of her life. It wasn't something she pictured for herself long-term, but she hadn't realized it until it was far too late; very much the sort of person who agreed to get married and have a child before they fully considered all that it would mean (which isn't an uncommon character flaw). But, between the general state of the world at the time and her own hidden struggles, she was eager to feel like she was doing something meaningful with her life.

Nate was the same. It was one of the only things they'd had in common anymore by the time Shaun was born.

I imagine their marriage was struggling (or perhaps simply not as satisfying as either of them would have liked), and having Shaun was an ill-conceived attempt to save things, to find some sort of renewed enthusiasm or meaning. Of course, having a baby to fix your marriage (or yourself) never works. Pregnancy and labor were rough for her, but postpartum was worse; her husband continued to pull away like he had been before, just at a more agonizing rate.

Pretty immediately after the birth, she recognized she'd made a mistake, felt stupid and childish for making such a life-altering decision based on flimsy justifications. But so many people in her life (parents, in-laws, friends who were already parents themselves, society in general) swore to her that having a child would magically end all of her problems through the sheer power of maternal love that she felt selfish not "putting forth the effort" and trying. No one bothered to clarify, though, that if the old 'baby trick' doesn't fix your life, you're then stuck with an inherently needy little person whose existence you may feel indifferent towards more often than not. That realization had been in the middle of literally crushing her to death when the bombs fell.

She's slowly finding herself again as she goes through various adventures and trials in the Commonwealth, helps build community that feels more like a real family to her. Dips her toes into the dating pool eventually. It's not a straightforward process, though, and some days she feels like an uncaring monster and can't even get out of bed. Others, she functions, but with a visible cloud over her, morose and quiet. A tiny, irrational part of her may even feel that she somehow manifested the war, literally brought forth the end of the world with how ardently she begged for something, anything to take her away from what her life had become towards the end.

Her guilt is tinted with anger and shame. She still has lingering health issues from carrying to full term, and her body is changed in ways she knows she will never recover from. Fixates on the changes she notices and it breeds self-consciousness. Part of that fixation is vanity, sure, but she also knows very well that she likely shaved at least a few years off her life span by choosing to become a mother, an endeavor she wouldn't describe as "personally worthwhile" if pressed hard enough.

She also constantly beats herself up for not searching hard enough for her son, but it's unproductive. No matter how guilty she makes herself feel, she doesn't find many leads. Doesn't bring him or Nate up much, unless she's feeling especially vulnerable (or self-hating). The pity people usually express when she says she lost a spouse/child doesn't feel earned to her.

Part of her says her son is likely dead, having lived his whole life without her, and so she'd be wasting her time by dedicating every waking moment to finding him. She finds both peace and sadness in that idea. Another part of her, though, knows she's dragging her feet, pacifying herself with that thought because she doesn't truly want to find him.

[tutanchanup]

HOW WOULD VLAD III. DRACULEA BE AS A VAMPIRE?

(look how he still has his wedding ring but it's on his right hand as - from what I learned - in medieval times you'd actually wear it like that! Also did you notice the scars on his wrists from shackles of Corvinus' prison? Eek! 😊)

This question is inevitable. Whether we like it or not, the name of Vlad Draculea has been inseparably linked to that of the literary vampire. But we can at least look at how would the real Dracula, Vlad III Țepeș, voivode of Wallachia, look like in this role.

~•~•~

So, I've decided to listen to you and give you my opinion about Vlad as a vampire (I am honoured that someone wants to hear that, thank you 🥰, I'll answer the call of my people!). It became quite long, so I broke it down to several parts:

First, we'll look what the curse of vampirism would do to a psyche of an average human, and then we compare it to Vlad, who was formed by his mediaeval upbringing (in some future post I'll also discuss that in detail, so if you're interested in that, look ahead 😄). In part 2 (in a future post), I'll look at how he would physically look like - what fashion would he use (you'll be surprised!), his physical behaviour, and what impression would his presence make upon you. And in part 3 we'll look at his personality and the reasoning behind his actions. And, if someone would be actually interested, I am willing to make part 4 where I'd tell you what depictions of Dracula in media that I've seen so far I feel are closest to this and why 😉.

Disclaimer: as I have yet to talk to Vlad Draculea myself (just kidding, I actually have him locked in my closet, bwahaha!), please note that this is all MY OPINION. Feel free to tell me to shove it up my ar*e. But since this opinion is based upon at least some reasoning, please give your reasoning as well 😉.

Should you listen to me or not? Find out here.

~°~°~

So now, when we're done with the formalities, let's finally get into the big question itself:

How would Vlad III. Draculea deal with a curse of vampirism?

Prepare your tea, as this will be long 😄

Since there are many versions of vampiric curses in media, we'll look only at the two most common aspects: immortality and the need to drink human! blood (a.k.a kill humans, no bloodbags or vegan alternatives this time)

Let's see first what would such a curse do to a psyche of a regular human.

There are several huge pressures which could lead to a gradual break down of the former self, eventually opening the possibility to become a sadistic monster (of course everyone is different and would take it differently, but let's now look at the average human).

1. The Constant Need to Kill

The curse forces the vampire to regularly take human lives, gradually normalizing killing. This loss of respect for human life would eventually lead to dehumanization and a loss of empathy.

2. Isolation and Loneliness

An immortal would always end up forever alone, without family, friends, or a true community. Even when they would talk to humans, that would painfully remind them what they've lost since they are not human themselves anymore. This isolation would lead to hopelessness and despair, slowly eroding their psyche. If there would be other vampires, then they could pact with them, but since those would be under the pressure of the curse as well, it wouldn't be a cheerful company, instead making you face every time what have you yourself become, accelerating your loss of humanity.

3. Guilt and Desperation

Every decision about life and death would carry heavy consequences. When you take life once, you can never take it back. And the more power you have, the more catastrophic are the consequences of your failures. Also everyone makes mistakes, but in an immortal life you'd eventually accumulate a huge number of them. This overwhelming weight of guilt could lead one to distance oneself from their conscience, and that could result in sadism.

But what if this curse has happened to Vlad III. Draculea,

the medieval voivode from the 15th century, who's name is irrevocably linked with vampirism thanks to that unfortunate novel of Bram's?

We have to take in mind that he already was a voivode. A role that was always destined to him thanks to his royal blood, and which he was being prepared to carry since childhood

(yes, he was not the firstborn, but given the high turnover of voivodes on the throne, there was a big chance someone would use him to make him a pretender one day anyway. When you were born with a claim to the throne in your blood, you usually became a leader, or you were murdered by those in power who were afraid that you might use that claim of yours one day. It wasn't a choice)

And here comes the big surprise, as you can see:

The role of a voivode already carried exactly the same psychological pressures as the vampiric curse!

Don't believe me? Let's have a look!

1. The Constant Need to Kill

As a voivode, you also had the role of a judge and also a war commander (voivode comes from the Slavic word voj (army) vode (leader)). So the taking of human lifes would be inevitable, even if you didn't take it by your own hands. It was your responsibility to carry out laws and reign justice. In mediaeval times, the punishment for many crimes were deadly. So you already had to cope with that responsibility that you're the one deciding over people's fate. There was really no other choice, too - if you'd decide not to implement punishments according to the law, your own people would be angry at you, as they would see you as someone not upholding the law. And if you'd be too merciful, you'd be seen as weak, which would lead to your downfall and decapitation at the hands of you rivals (no, they wouldn't let you live and become a threat one day)

2. Isolation and Loneliness

The role of a monarch is a lonely one. You're alone in your position. You're the sole leader of the nation and everyone counts on you, which means that you have access to some nice luxury, but you're also cut off from real human connection, because noone will see you as their equal (in their eyes, you're above). Yes, you might eventually be given a wife, but that's an arranged marriage. And what sense is there in falling madly in love when you never know when you'll be called into battle (where you'd be expected to lead at the front), or when will your rivals finally succeed in planting their dagger into your back? I'm not saying that you never could love, but you'd be very careful with that, since if your enemies would see that you actually love someone, they would exploit that new weakness of yours immediately. Your view on love would be the same as that of the immortal vampire - they would know that it can never last forever because their sweetheart will die. You as a monarch know that it won't last forever because YOU'll probably die.

3. Guilt and Desperation

When your every ruling decides the fate of your nation, the consequences of your failures will be massive as well - for example when you make a bad decision and that leads to an Ottoman Invasion, your country will be pillaged, your men cut into pieces, woman raped and children taken into slavery.

So as you can see, for Vlad Draculea, the pressures of vampiric curse would be nothing new. For him, it would only be the continuation of his voivodeship, only in different clothes. And he knew how to cope with them before, so he would also know how to cope with them now. Because in real life he didn't descend into becoming a sadistic monster (#don't believe mediaeval propaganda)

If you're interested in the specific coping mechanisms based in mediaeval psyche that he used to be able to fulfill his role as a voivode, I am preparing a separate post about that, and I promise you you'll be fascinated. And it actually could help you deal with modern problems as well. It certainly did help me massively 😉. I'll link the post here as well when it's done eventually.

Edit: part 1 is already done! Here are some tips useful for mental health from Vlad

This one is more on general coping mechanisms useful for dealing with excessive emotions such a role would bring. In some future part I'll also pick apart how specifically he'd have dealt with the pressure of responsibility of such a role, which is more in topic to this post.

So out of all people, it would be the famous Dracula himself, who would keep most of his humanity intact!

...which is quite ironic when you look at how in almost every traditional portrayal he's a sadistic monster. Yes, the curse could do that to a regular human. But paradoxically not to Vlad III Draculea himself.

Would Draculea descend into a self-deprecating existence, hiding away from human sight in shame like most vampires do?

I would not count on it. Not because he was a voivode, but because he was Vlad Draculea.

Look, even if he might hate what he have become (as becomming a blood sucking immortal would probably go against his christian values), if anything, Draculea has never before let anything define him as a victim.

When the ottomans tortured him as a child, he didn't become a "poor tortured boy". He used it to make himself stronger and became a warrior. And that's why the Ottomans never managed to break him, as opposed to others.

Same would happen now - he wouldn't let the curse make him into "a poor cursed monster". He would be still a "voivode who happened to be under the curse of vampirism, ah well, what can you do, at least now I've got more weapons in my arsenal, nice!"

I am not saying that perhaps he would not disagree with the course, no, I think he even might be angry that this happened to him, the same way as he was justifiably angry when the ottomans tortured him. He might even spend a long time trying to find a cure for the curse. Because he was a man who wanted to always be in control (which makes sense when you look at his childhood, where he as a prisoner had no control at all), and if he was cursed against his will, or if the curse made him do things he didn't want to do, he would try his best to get rid of it (like he tried to get rid of the ottomans).

But in the meantime he would use it as best he could for his own purpose, like he still used an ottoman kilij for fighting, even though he hated the ottomans - because they trained him with the kilij and he wasn't a hateful fool to just throw it away the moment he got free from their captivity. He was pragmatic, he knew that after years of training he will always be better at fighting with kilij than with other swords (and also in some ways the curved sabre IS better than a straight sword, as we can see that it later took over. So Draculea would see that advantage as well).

Yeah, if you want to define Vlad in one single word, it would be: "pragmatic"

He had never let himself be overwhelmed with blind hatred - look how he withdrew his men from the night attack near Târgoviște, EVEN THOUGH he was this close to killing the sultan! But he withdrew his men instead because he knew that they would suffer horrible losses if he didn't withdraw in the right time.

But I also don't mean that he would let himself go and then try to excuse his behaviour like "ah, it's okay for me to murder you all, because you see, I am a vampire, I have no other choice" IF HE ACTUALLY HAD OTHER CHOICES AVAILABLE. He'd still feel obliged to use his power responsibly, as he did when he had power as a voivode.

So, when we take into account all this, we can see that he would probably never descend into crouching in the shadows (if that wasn't a part of some strategic plan of course), trying to hide away from the world so that noone may look at him and see the monster he became.

No, he would still have his honour and pride. He would never 'talk as a low vampire'. He would always talk as a voivode. But he would use his vampiric aspects when it would suit him strategically - for example he would smile exposing his teeth when purposedly trying to scare someone (as pictured).

So the final verdict is:

Vlad would never be a vampire. Vlad would be a voivode who also happens to be a vampire.

[ghiblinsm]

cannon list

first movie:

Wade doesn't actually know anything that really happened to you in the workshop, just bits and pieces that were hinted by Francis.

“You have to live with the shitty thing you did for the rest of your life.”

you love your dad, really you do. but you will always have a bit of resentment for what he signed you up for.

"It doesn't get better, and it doesn't get easier. I can't keep lying to myself,"

during the months you were being injected fluids in your blood, Austin had kept asking his mom to call Wade and see what happened.

“Yo, this is Wade. I’m either out doing mercenary stuff, getting into trouble, or just avoiding your call. Leave a message. Beep”

Anytime Wade sees you with clothes that show your arms and legs, he always thinks about how the scars on your skin were caused by him. (not s.h scars but thunder like scars caused by other types of torture)

“Who knew that bringing my daughter to a workshop full of dangerous crap would be a bad idea? Genius move, Wade. Just chalk it up to another day of being a fantastic father.”

He's never brought it up but sometimes he notices you looking in the mirror a little longer then usual then sees you later in a new outfit of pants or leggings and a long sleeve or cardigan.

"I can't stand to look at my scars, every time I look at them, I'm reminded at what happened. How he failed to protect me and i don't want to hold that against him..."

More often then you two both like to admit, you both make a bunch of self-deprecating jokes about being a bad father/daughter.

Wade: "You know, sweetheart, I always thought I'd be a great dad… but I guess I took 'daddy issues' to a whole new level, huh? Can I put that on my résumé?"

You: "At least you made the list. I didn’t even make it onto the ‘good daughter’ list. I’m just the bonus kid with the emotional baggage. You’d think I’d be on sale by now."

second movie:

When you first met Russell you could only think about how scary it must've been for him to be surrounded by people trying to say they knew how he felt.

"You’re a mess, Russell. But I took responsibility for your actions, and I can’t just leave you."

when you were put in the ice box prison you kind of gave up, just like you father. except since you saw how much Russell was trying you decided to at least help him not get beat up.

"I’ve spent my whole life trying to do what’s best for everyone else. I forgot to take care of myself."

during the whole ordeal your heart and mind were in-between resentment and pity for your dad. he was acting like the world stopped when vanessa was shot when it didn't. you still feel bad for feeling this way.

"The only way to get through the day is to keep pushing forward, even if it feels like you’re dragging the weight of the world."

a secret you didn't even tell your dad was that when most of the x force died you giggled and sent a video to Austin.

"I'm sorry for your loss...*later* Austin i need to laugh so fricking badly but i can't because i'm with colossus. what do i do?"

Wade's a little disappointed in himself for this one but, when you all were in the ice box prison and he saw you trying to keep Russell out of shit, he thought he could leave Russell in your hands and stay out of everything, despite more prisoners getting violent.

"I want to be the person who helps people. I want to be the person who can make a difference. But I don’t know how."

Third movie

the day Wade tried to join the avengers you were chilling with Austin who was on the phone with Peter and somehow interviews came up in discussion and you heard Peter ask Austin how common alliterative names were because Happy was talking about a disrespectful guy that came in for an interview and had a 'dumb' name.

"I’m just a guy who loves a good time. Who cares about the rest?"

when nicepool led y'all to his honda, you were thinking back to peter's situation with two other spiderman and when wolverine and your dad were in the car you couldn't help but ask nicepool how his y/n was.

"You can’t change the past. You can only learn from it and hope that you don’t repeat the same mistakes."

you were friends with laura for a short while at the age of 11 and when you two met again in the void you both immediately did y'all's handshake out of instinct.

“Life is short! So we should spend it having fun and making memories!”

couldn't really think of more stuff for the third movie that would involve spoiling stuff I have planned so it was cut short.

hope y'all liked it!

"Well everyone loves me" by Rizzy105 on wattpad

[menlove]

the other thing too is that losing weight is NOT a neutral action in the same way that being fat is.

what do I mean by that?

well, it is morally neutral in that no one should be judging you for wanting to lose weight & wanting to lose weight does not make you a bad person

however. it's not a neutral action. in the same way that feminists critique the beauty industry and makeup and constantly get replies like "but I LIKE wearing makeup!!!!" that completely miss the point. that's sort of the same thing happening when fat activists/people that advocate for fat liberation point out the flaws in diet culture and get "but I NEED to lose weight for (xyz "good" reasons) are you saying I'm a bad person?" that completely miss the point.

in an ideal world, people could lose and gain weight without a single bat of an eye. but we don't live in that world. not only is it scientifically proven that most people CANNOT sustainably keep weight they've lost off (and no, not due to lack of self control) and that losing weight (especially rapidly) can have some huge health consequences, but, more relevantly, these ideas of weight and health and beauty are SO tangled up in fatphobia and western beauty standards that it's nigh impossible to reach some Enlightened State where your reason for weight loss is untouched by it.

you want to lose weight to "be healthier?" who told you you were unhealthy? was it your doctor? doctors that routinely suggest fat patients lose weight for every complaint ever including the common cold or a broken bone? was it society telling you being fat is unhealthy even though you ARE healthy? and if you're Not healthy, do you know for sure it's your weight? because thin people can also have high cholesterol and heart problems. there's other ways to fix these things that don't involve weight loss to dangerous degrees, but doctors are already so up their own ass about fat people that they probably didn't discuss anything with you other than "lose weight." does that mean no fat person ever is unhealthy because they're fat? no. but it Does mean that that reason is so tangled up in fatphobia that 100% stating you're free of diet culture when you say it just is Not accurate

you want to lose weight to "feel better about yourself"? well this one's easy and won't be as long as the last. why do you feel that way? who taught you that being fat is something to feel bad about? if you lived 500 years ago before diet culture, would you feel pressure to lose weight to feel better about yourself?

and none of this is to say you CAN'T chose to lose weight. it's your body. you can do whatever the fuck you want with it, good or bad. but when people talk about fatphobia and fat liberation and your first response is "oh but I'm losing weight for the GOOD reasons" stop yourself. ask if that's relevant to the conversation. ask yourself if those reasons ARE neutral. if they're tied to health, body image (including dysphoria!), or how other people perceive you? the answer is no

[youremyheaven]

Lana Del Rey: Kibbe Analysis

My one big issue with discussions of Kibbe IDs is how we seldom consider how these manifest in regular people with regular bodies. Every Kibbe ID has a certain "look" associated with them. SDs are presumed to be voluptuous, like the human incarnation of a fertility goddess, therefore people who are underweight/thin are automatically classified as something other than SD. verified FNs tend to be very thin and athletic so someone who is heavier is presumed to not be an FN. Most verified TRs are dead white women who were very very small so someone who is of average height with a more average build is perceived to be anything other than TR.

Since SN is the most common type, every woman with an average build is typed as one. This is especially true of those who have a heavier build, because weight gain, especially if its due to medication/health issues/binge eating etc can make anybody regardless of type, look "broad and bulky".

Lana has been in the limelight for over a decade at this point and her body has been under great scrutiny. She's a normal person whose weight fluctuates. Its important to understand that. Your Kibbe ID does not change with weight gain/loss. Kibbe is about image identity, that's not something that can be altered with plastic surgery or weight loss/gain; its who you are.

With that said, I believe Lana is a Flamboyant Natural.

Lana has a naturally straight-ish frame with little waist definition. At a lower weight her body is more narrow.

Her hips and her bust do not break the line of her body, which is to say they are not very prominent through the clothes she wears.

(im sorry Lana's head is cropped but I promise its Lana!!)

Compare Lana's chest to Selena's on the right. With weight gain, both of them have bigger chests but Selena (verified TR) has a chest that's naturally curved and prominent whereas Lana's chest is more broad and wide and not as pronounced.

Its evident in these pictures how her body does not look "curvy", her bust and her hips are not prominent or pronounced, she has a "straight" frame. She is a Natural type. According to celebheights.com (this is the most accurate source for celebrity heights as celebs usually exaggerate their heights) Lana is 167cms or 5'6 but seems taller, she is not rounded or blunt and has obvious vertical. This is why she is Flamboyant Natural and not Soft Natural.

These are all outfits that highlight her Romantic/Dramatic/Ethereal essence.

All these light flowy fabrics look soooo good on her and her Kibbe ID & essences all seem to harmonize well.

Naturals have the frame to carry light flowy fabrics without looking shapeless or like they're carrying a sack. Its giving ✨goddess ✨

Soft, light weight fabrics like silk, satin and kind of loose, unstructured dresses work very well for Natural types.

These aren't very flattering looks on Lana because they emphasize width and dont accomodate her vertical. When she's in outfits that suit her ID & essence, she shines so much<333

[lostsoulaltair]

Owari no Seraph Chapter 133 - Analysis & Review

Hello everyone, it's been a goddamn while; I've been busy with things, also learning constantly a new language; thus, given that I did like the latest chapter, I wanted to talk or discuss about it; as always, feel free to discuss, disagree, or share your thoughts; though of course, the only thing I request is respect.

Thus let's proceed

A destroyed world a talk about the "meaning of life" & "what it means to live". At the end, we're young.

The chapter might joke a lot between the girl's conversation which it might feel unnecesary or perhaps not worth it but given how the two characters were build; Shinoa is the type of character that does know when there's certain tension when someone is concerned about her.

But let's focus on something more important; the chapter begins with Mitsuba finally finding Shinoa who has been far away from her squad after Guren, Mahiru, Krul and company left to most likely the place where Yuu is.

Mitsuba after for so long finally made an appearance which is something I'm glad for; and as a good friend, she shows her concern given that she's never seen Shinoa act out of her usual demanor.

Something that I do find adorable is the very fact that Mitsuba is trying to be supportive given that there is a weight being carried on Shinoa's shoulders; while it's true Shinoa has never spoken about what she endured as a child; Mitsuba does want to understand her friend and no matter what might happen, they're there for her.

Thus leading to the next panel; Shinoa has always seen herself as a character with no value or rather, that thanks to her existance, the lives of innocents were screwed given that she was compatible with the monster that made sure the world ended in the way it is.

But once again, Mitsuba does convey the message of how Yoichi, Kimizuki and her feel towards her given that there's absolutely no one to reasure her that her life is as valuable as others.

And of course, we got the author with its weird interest on female bodies but; jokes aside from such panel; there's an aspect of truth to it. They are teenagers, they're no longer kids; they're characters that were forced to grow up at a very young age, forced to change to endure all the struggles of their surroundings to the point they had to mimic adults in a sense.

Many might find it pointless, boring, and perhaps even unrelated but the very fact that they touched the emotions of Shinoa does lead to a heavier topic.

Such topic is reflected in the next panel:

While it's true that Yuu has constantly talked about "a reason to live", "family", "friends", etc. Yuu does not know the weight of those words; he says he's going to save everyone, but in order to save somoene, there are consequences, losses and the sort in such path; nothing can be obtained for free in life and that's something that perhaps he might face eventually.

Returning with the squad, Mitsuba at first dismisses such question about the "meaning of life".

There is a huge relevance to the question; and this of course, reflects to the very first issue; that they've been working on how to save their lives that they haven't ever thought about themselves.

While it is very common to see that whenever someone says "that person thinks about themselves" it can come in a negative connotation; but that's not entirely the case; there's a difference between being selfish and understanding one's self.

When it comes to being selfish, it does relate about not caring a bit about what your actions may eventually do to others, how much harm you may cause due to them, willingly or not; it is literally dismissing a reason to as to why there may be something halting something one may want.

But, when it comes to understanding one's self; it is not only a superfitial level of understanding; it is knowing what one person may want, may long, may fight for, what may make them sad, what may anger them, etc.

In this case, Mitsuba realized that she has never given a deep thought to what she, as Mitsuba Sanguu truthfully wants. She grew up to be a soldier, to battle every time in order to protect those who couldn't protect themselves but with the development of the squad, it was not just a journey of sticking together, it was a journey of finding out that love can develop after getting to meet someone.

Eventually, Mitsuba does understand that it's not the typical joke mood or non serious conversation but rather a very important one.

In the next panel, Mitsuba's first longing or desire was to be acknowledged or to be validated. To be recognized; which of course, Shinoa mentions that she does understand that and it is true; Shinoa as a child did want validation from everyone or rather, instead of the term "validation", what it is more proper is "recognition or acknowledgement of existance".

True, in the current chapter Shinoa mentions she was luckier given that they never bothered with her; there's a difference between Mitsuba and Shinoa, which was showing what they could do in order to seek that. Mitsuba tried her best to show that she too held talent; alas with Shinoa, she simply ditched the idea, there was no reason to even fight about it.

But thanks to the very fact that she remembered what Mahiru did even if I too, agree that it was a really harsh method; she did know that at least someone cared about her existance.

Mitsu states that Shinoa was loved in contrast to her that no one loved her; which makes Shinoa to reasure her that she does love Mitsuba. And of course, while it's true that the original source uses the kanji Ai (愛) it does not carry a romantic context (Yes I've been studying if you wonder and there's still a longer way ahead).

Shinoa is reasuring Mitsuba that she too is loved; just like how Mitsuba expressed on her best way that Yoichi, Kimizuki and her cared about Shinoa's safety; Shinoa too knows that the squad itself cares about each other; after all, they're a small family that can only encourage each other to keep going.

But here comes something important that perhaps it might be to personal interpretation but Shinoa does state something important:

Because love exists for someone, it does not mean that's the sole reason to the meaning of life or for a reason to live.

What does that mean?

Us as humans, be in the different envioroments we end up growing, we end up finding purposes for our existance, sometimes it takes longer, other times we have certainty that we found out what we want to do with our lives; along such trail, we will find friends, perhaps a person we might fall in love; we might suffer about a heartbreak or two or so on; but despite that, it's a path we've chosen to walk because very independent of the bonds we forge along the way; there are things we want to do out there, we long for new experiences, new insights, new spots to visit, and of course, we can never suspend the time; we grow up, we mature, we gain interest in other things as we grow which is visible how from childhood, we change a lot when we become teenagers, so as adults too, we change.

In Shinoa's case, she is truthful that she does not find value to her life, given how many chains of events involving her lead to misfortune for others; but despite that, she is thankful that there are people out there that do love her despite the harm her existance may has brought up upon Earth.

Nevertheless, we get a follow up, once Shinoa expressed herself, Mitsuba asks her directly about Yuu's acknowledgement, recognition or validation. Which of course, she responds honestly to it.

It hurts; and it is natural that it hurts her; it's the first time she fell in love with someone but not in the same way Mahiru did, not in the same turn of events Mahiru went through; after all, it's something I'll discuss a bit further from here. Let's continue.

Shinoa eases the mood by asking Mitsuba about how she feels towards Yuu which of course she knows very well that she too has a crush on him. But despite that many might feel the conversation as pointless, there's something certain to the panel itself; it is letting the weight and torment of many mixed emotions go, finally opening up to someone who understands you, to have someone you can trust unconditionally.

The mood eventually soothes to the point the two of them are in peace; having talked about such things when they've never had the opportunity to act like teenage girls, it was a rather refreshing experience for them.

I can't say that's correct or not but even in movies that face the end of the world, characters tend to talk about things they long to do and the sort.

Once Mitsuba asks Shinoa about her first real reason to live; one could understand that it is left to free interpretation given that both girls are simply enjoying their youth; they still haven't found a very truthful reason as to why they're there but for now; they did understand something.

Life is not just about existance, it's more than just hoping validation or acknowledgment, it is akin to what exactly you want to experience, it is about what you want to do instead of what others want you to do.

This leads to the new path I've mentioned before and this shall be discussed in the next point

Moving onwards to a new goal

After a girl's talk; Mitsuba points out about Shinoa's talent that is way above Mahiru's; such talent has always been hinted since the LNs were created.

Shinoa mentions that given that at that time she lacked a motive along goals within her reach; and of course, even Shikama pointed it out that she lacked desires, there was not so much she could do despite being more powerful than Mahiru, nevertheless, Mitsuba is aware Shinoa has gained something she lacked from the very beginning. Confidence.

This leads for Shinoa to have a discussion with her squad, but of course, they were eavesdropping the girls; they gave them their privacy. While they too are clumsy, reckless, immature in general, they too understand that people need some time alone to recollect their thoughts; they understand that there are things that sometimes can only be discussed with a certain someone not because of a lack of interest but rather because there is something that can be conveyed way better.

But very independent of that, it just reflects that Yoichi and Kimizuki have been worried as well about the girls after Yuu's departure along Guren and Vampires.

The next scene is actually something I am rather thankful that I actually thought I'd never see in the story in general; and that is the very fact that they're taking independent action for once; they're no longer following Guren's orders, they're no longer following a vampire's guidance that ends up falling in Guren's hand or Shikama's; nor they are following Yuu's wishes but rather; they're trying to open up a new path but exclusively for what they do label as "family".

Within the squad members, Kimizuki, Yoichi and Mitsuba long to see their families back due to the unfair deaths they had; Shinoa despite not having someone to call family or rather simply accepting the course of nature; she does want to see her friends having their families back, she has seen them struggle, she has seen the desperation of Kimizuki, the longing of Yoichi to have a miracle granted. But instead of following someone else's agenda given that Guren and Mahiru do have knowledge that they simply won't share to the squad; it is the first step for them to walk and open a new path for them.

Shinoa is very aware that their knowledge is limited, along the fact that they're not on an equal ground in terms of power; but given that now she does have confidence and something else; as I mentioned briefly in the other point; Shinoa has a deep understanding that the actions her sister took, do not defind her present or future nor how she will eventually turn out; such outcomes are only decided by her alone and if she wants to create a path along her friends, she has to fight for it giving away for the first time, the real power she has within her.

The very fact that Kiseki-O and Gekkouin were manifested by force instead by their wielders says something about what Shikama sought with Shinoa, what could it be?

Correct. Shikama or Sika Madu, was once an angel that served God but due to his arrogance, he lost his path leading to his eternal punishment for it; but even still, even if the angels that fell with him deemed or viewed him as a God. There was something even the reincarnations of such Fallen Angels were never subjected to.

Absolute control.

And thanks to reading the RAW version of the catastrophe at 16 manga; the purpose of Mahiru and Shinoa at the beginning was to control the punishment the Seraph of the End experiment held. But in contrast to Mahiru; Shinoa was born capable to control demons, she was capable of seeing them from a very young age but given that she has motivation along an objective; that power finally has shined. Leading to a new battle:

Perhaps you, dear readers may wonder how Shinoa was able to connect with Shikama despite him sending her off or cutting their ties; and of course, she does mention there was a small connection; truth to be told; even if Shikama wanted, she was born with him; they were together ever since she came to existance, hence that even if he tried to severe his ties to her, there will be something chaining him down.

And of course, the battle between Shinoa and Shikama has begun

Shikama gave away his power for light BUT, given that Shinoa could devour such darkness; it can only lead this

All the power that came from God's light may be stored in Shinoa's body and as they say, even if darkness tries to consume light; light always finds a way to cast aside the shadows that darkness creates.

Quite long huh? What do you think?

Let me know!!

[jihyoruri]

okay I NEED to talk abt this bc richgirlyn is literally me FORREAL 

so uhh not the analysis I thought I’d be doing but I need to. the other one will be later 

ok tw for eds I guess like this is the entire analysis 

disclaimer. this is all my interpretation as well as my experience. I’ve had an issues w eating since 8 (almost twins!) and it’s been literal years. this is just what I think based on what I’VE seen and done as a girl. I know men can have ed’s but I will be talking abt it from my standpoint, which is hashtag girl. everyone’s experience is different.

key: ana=anorexia, ed=eating disorder 

Ive never dealt with real bulimia so take whatever I say with a grain of salt

okay. here’s why richgirlyn having an ed, specifically how she develops ana as she gets older makes a lot of sense (Ive had a fixation on eds and the way they affect the mind for so long..)

i feel like people forget just how genuinely maddening have an eating disorder is.

most of the time in movies they’re there for laughs and portrayed as “oh she just kinda throws up!”  (heathers, the musical) or “oh she wants to be skinny so bad she js doesn’t eat!” (mean girls) (I love both of them btw they’re just what come to mind)

like that is not what they are like AT ALL

eating disorders are some of the most deadly mental illness there is and because it mostly affects teenage girls and women people literally treat it like something not that serious or a joke it’s actually insane how people do not gaf about it

so anyway.

I feel like if children have issues with food they always start out thinking of purging

it makes sense! if you don’t want calories, just get rid of them.

obviously, it doesn’t work that way, and purging doesn’t even actually work well LMAO most of the calories are absorbed unless u throw up like the second food enters ur mouth like it is not foolproof at all.

but to a child it makes sense. the food is gone so you can’t gain weight

and when you’re a kid your gag reflex is way more sensitive so it’s way easier to vomit. when you get older it’s so much harder

bulimia is not really possible long term for idols because of its side effects which are:

erosion of tooth enamel making them appear clear other than white

sunken in, bulging eyes

swollen cheeks

hair loss 

GERD

also for the fact it doesn’t really help much with not absorbing the calories + the fact that it affects the appearance, which idols need to be perfect, + the fact that it affects your voice, which idols need, and also throwing up is difficult 

much more common in idols is anorexia.

so! actually the side effects of ana aren’t as noticeable if you’re not restricting a lot! at about 700-800 calories max a day I didn’t experience hair loss or getting spots on my skin

It was mostly that I was just tired all the time and kind of irritable. i never experienced any physical effects other than losing weight (didn’t lose much muscle bc most of the cals were protein and I worked out everyday)

anyway

richgirlyn definitely likes control.

we can see how control has been taken from her time and time again— mostly by her dad, making all the decisions while she doesn’t get a say, and later, how her members and the people around her treat her.

eds are about control more than looks. It’s the one safety net, the one thing you can always be good at.

when everything around you is falling apart— you can control what you eat. it’s like an accomplishment. look how low I got the number! I’m so good at this! I’m so disciplined!

It’s like. “no one could ever get as low as me”. It makes you weirdly competitive 

and obviously there’s pressure to be skinny as a trainee. It’s what half of your self worth is based on. so if you can control that? and punish yourself (because as we’ve discussed richgirlyn does NAWT like herself that much) while you’re at it? It’s literally gold

she practices and practices, trying to be good enough, the best, and she doesn’t want to eat. eating is kind of like admitting defeat and saying you’re weak and giving in to the need to have food. 

oh and y’all don’t KNOW what mommy issues do with an ed like.

if losing weight makes someone PROUD? oh you KNOW you’re dropping to size 0 trust like it’s actually insane. I can’t even explain the real insanity that comes with an ed it makes you actually crazy. you start becoming afraid of certain numbers because they look bigger even if it’s not how it works. ex: it’s better to eat 98 cal than 50 because 98 feels “smaller” like it’s CRAZY. the state of mind you have when you’re doing that is really seriously not normal like I know it’s obvious but people don’t GET IT. you become very obsessive and cagey over it like if you eat over a certain limit you will literally either break down or get up and go work out until you think you’re back under and the guilt eats you up inside. richgirlyn is SAUR MEEEE FOR REAL

so ANYWAY richgirlyn having an ed makes sense. specifically ana.

she likes control, she wants something to feel proud about (along with her singing and dancing and rapping abilities), it’s something her mom’s PRAISED HER FOR so you already KNOW when her mom is like “wowww you’ve lost weight!” she is like I’m gonna get so much worse.

and also there has to be a part of her that wants someone to worry. i know she hates being seen as weak but I just know minjeong saying smth like “oh I wondered how u stay thin it’s cause u js don’t eat” made her feel so validated because it’s proof that she’s sick and she’s not okay and she’s not making it up.

I’m very sure her being well off has completely fucked with the idea of her being “allowed” to feel negative emotions. like “I’m rich, I shouldn’t be sad” but with any negative emotion.

and I know she was getting better until she got put in le sserafim I just KNOW especially CURRENTLY?

the stress of her members disliking her makes her feel worse abt her self making her want more control and also there’s this very fucked up part of it where it’s like. the less I eat and the less space I take up the more they’ll like me, they won’t hurt me if they think I’m sick and fragile and GODDD that’s so her. she wants to be strong so bad but sometimes.

anyway it’s 1 am this isn’t a great analysis maybe I’ll circle back to this but I needed to talk about it

I love richgirlyn she’s witerwally me 

-🎏

It’s crazy that everything you just said is so correct like completely correct when it comes to richgirl!yn’s problems.

and because this has been going on since she was ten it’s just a normal routine for her all that girl does is try her best to become better, and because she knows that her image is something that her mother actually pays attention about her, so it’s rlly important to her.

even now that she’s an idol she doesn’t talk to her mom but there’s times when her mom will call her and be like “you look a little different.” and then she’s completely back in that cycle

[alicefoley24]

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2. What is Semaglutide?

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3. What is Tirzepatide?

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4. Semaglutide vs. Tirzepatide: Key Differences

Feature

Semaglutide

Tirzepatide

Hormones Targeted

GLP-1

GLP-1 and GIP

Brand Examples

Wegovy, Ozempic

Mounjaro

Average Weight Loss

Approximately 14.9% of body weight

Over 20% of body weight

Injection Frequency

Weekly

Weekly

Side Effects

Nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, constipation

Nausea, diarrhea, decreased appetite, fatigue

Both medications are administered weekly and have demonstrated significant weight loss results. However, Tirzepatide may offer slightly greater weight reduction compared to Semaglutide.​

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6. Safety and Side Effects to Know

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Semaglutide: Nausea, vomiting, diarrhea, constipation. ​

Tirzepatide: Nausea, diarrhea, decreased appetite, fatigue. ​

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These medications may be suitable for adults who:​

Have a Body Mass Index (BMI) of 30 or higher (classified as obesity).​

Have a BMI of 27 or higher with weight-related conditions such as high blood pressure, type 2 diabetes, or high cholesterol.

Have struggled with weight loss through diet and exercise alone.​

A comprehensive evaluation with a healthcare provider, such as those at Ongo Weight Loss, can help determine eligibility.​

8. How to Get Started with Ongo Weight Loss

Embarking on a weight loss journey with Ongo Weight Loss involves:

Booking a Consultation: Meet with a healthcare professional to discuss your goals and medical history.​

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9. FAQs About Semaglutide and Tirzepatide

Are these injections safe? When used under medical supervision, they are generally considered safe.​

How fast will I lose weight? Weight loss varies; significant results are typically observed over several months.​

Can I stop after reaching my goal? Discontinuation

[echoesofinsights]

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[biggsodorcitystories]

Henry's "Old Shape."

(A Headcanon)

Here is how I have interpreted Henry's infamous "old shape" in my humanised AU.

Henry was born with several birth defects, which were blamed on (but likely completely unrelated to) his being the result of a one-night-stand. As an engine, these defects only manifest in a small firebox, but in human form, they are much more visible.

Henry's small firebox translated into unusually small lungs. As a result, he was constantly in a state of breathlessness, struggling with dizziness and exhaustion, and often had bloodshot eyes from struggling to take in enough oxygen.

As an engine, Henry famously struggled with making enough steam. Given that steam engines also use their steam to regulate their body temperature, struggling to produce steam makes them extremely sweaty when they revert to human form. So Henry had a very significant sweat problem. Mercifully, engine sweat smells sooty rather than human BO. However, Henry often found that lingering soot in the air would stick to his sweaty body and hair, making him look and feel filthy.

He also suffered from constant loss of appetite, both from his illness and depression. As a result, and exacerbated by the sweating, Henry could not sustain any weight gain. This gave him a pinched and emaciated appearance. Unfortunately, given that he was taller than Gordon, he had an almost cryptid-like appearance and would sometimes frighten passengers. His shirts were ill-fitting and a bizarre contrast to his naturally solid legs (common in male tender engines).

Overall, Henry was rendered despite his size, rather feeble and decidedly lonely when he started out on Sodor. Edward, the oldest of the NWR engines, was very kind and sympathetic towards him and would offer help sometimes. Thomas was cheeky to him, but this was comforting for Henry as the little oik was cheeky to everyone. Gordon and James, however, would mock him and openly looked down on him, often discussing his most recent failure within earshot.

Then, one day, Sir Topham Hatt himself had joined his crew to observe his morning train. He tried so hard, but all his efforts only seemed to make his problems worse. To his utter humiliation, he had to stop at Wellsworth and watch as Edward - his older, female, and visibly pregnant colleague - took the train for him.

Afterwards, Edward was quick to offer comfort and tried to reassure him that Sir Topham Hatt wanted to help him get better, but Gordon and James gossiped about him, mocking his recent failure with open glee. Henry had never felt lower in his life and couldn't see any hope for the future.