#or I could be terribly pretentious and all around awful

[forever-rogue]

#19 from the grumpy sunshine tropes with Javi Pena, you write him so well and i feel like this would be perfect 🥹💕

AN | Here we have a few little snippets with grumpy!Javi and sunshine!reader! I pictured agm!Javi and Dulzura, but you don’t have to ready it as them❤️

Pairing | Javier x Fem!Reader 

Warnings | Language

Word Count | 2.1k

Masterlist | Main, Javier

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Javier,” you groaned as you nudged his leg with yours shaking your head in exasperation, “don’t be such a grump all the time. You’re really bringing down the mood.”

“The mood?” he raised an eyebrow and looked around the living room as though to see who else was around, “what mood? It’s only us.”

“My mood,” you huffed indignantly, gently tossing a throw pillow at him. He’d never once considered owning something as ‘pretentious’ as a throw pillow before he’d met you, but here you were, “don’t bring my mood down or you can sleep on the couch. How about that?”

“Baby,” he’d caught the pillow and tucked it behind his head, “Dulzura. We’re just watching a bad movie-”

“A sweet romantic comedy,” you interjected, “it’s cute!”

“Fine - we’re watching a sweet romantic comedy that is objectively not great and unrealistic,” he looked you over to look at the expression on your face, only to find you struggling to hold back a smile, “but if it makes you happy, we’ll watch all the terrible - good - movies you love. Okay?”

You remained silent for a moment, and Javier grew worried for a few moments that you were somehow still upset. You’d always made fun of him for being a grump but he’d never thought much about it. You wouldn’t really hold that over him, right?

You tossed the blanket off your lap before scooting over to his side of the couch and sat down on his lap. His hands instinctively went to your hips as he held you steady and you put your hands on his shoulders. You put a hand on his face, brushing your thumb over his cheek before pressing a kiss to his lips. 

“My taste in cinema is top notch,” you whispered in his ear, “you’re just a grumpy old man and don’t appreciate these types of things as much as I do.”

“I appreciate you,” he took your jaw in his hand and gently turned your face to his so he could kiss you properly, “which is basically the same thing huh, my little sunshine?”

“Absolutely not,” you teased, wrapping your fingers gently around his wrist, “but I love you so it’s okay. We can agree to disagree on these types of things.”

“Yeah,” he agreed, studying your face with a look nothing short of pure adoration, “we can, Dulzura. I love you too.”

“Smart man, Javier,” you beamed at him, “the best man.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Look at this,” your eyes were wide as you looked around the small cafe in awe. It was nearing Valentine’s day and everything was decorated in pinks and reds, hearts and glitter everywhere. For you, it was like a dream come true - for Javier it was all too much and performative, “it’s precious. I love this place. Oh, we could come back here for brunch on Valentine’s day!”

“It’s…” he trailed off, following you towards the counter to place your order, “something.”

You offered the barista your order, turning to Javier so he could place his. He looked so out of place and unimpressed that it offered you a moment of pause. Maybe you shouldn’t have forced him to come to this place with you. You’d seen this place on your way home from work and thought it might be a fun little outing; you hadn’t thought about how much Javier might dislike it. 

“Sir?” the young barista behind the counter had a huge smile on their face and you just knew that they were a huge extrovert and would have taken any opportunity to have a conversion. Javier kept his face neutral as he stood next to you and quickly offered up his order. They wrote it down and you quickly handed your card over before Javier could even think about it, “you guys can go ahead and take a seat and we’ll bring it right over!”

“C’mon,” you reached for his hand and pulled him towards a table closer towards the back, “we’ll just stay out of the way here.”

He sat down across from you with a concerned expression on his face, “sorry for being a huge ass.”

“You’re not an ass, Javier,” you snorted in amusement as he sat back and crossed his arms over his broad chest, raising an eyebrow, “you’re just not…this vibe. For actual Valentine’s Day we can do something a little more…both of us.”

“Sometimes I wonder how or why you put up with me,” he nudged your leg with his as you rolled your eyes at him, “my little ray of sunshine.”

“First of all I don’t put up with you,” you reminded him pointedly , “I love you and the fact that you’re different from me just makes us work better. But yeah this place is…a lot. Even though it’s cute.”

“Dulzura-”

“But that doesn’t mean that you have to change for me or anyone and I’m not going to change for you either, right?” you were waving your hands around in a way that made Javier smile, a big, genuine smile. You were always so animated and loud and happy; it served to make him happy too. Before you could say anything else your coffees and pastries were dropped off with a bit of razzle dazzle, “I don’t that…of course there’s things we’ll have to work on and comprise eventually but ultimately-”

“Relax,” he reached across the table and put your hand on top of his, “I know what you mean, baby.” 

“Okay,” you took a sip from your coffee, take a moment to savor the sweetness, “I know I can be a lot sometimes, but if its ever…too much, you know you can tell me. I don’t want to-”

“I love you and your lotness,” he promised, “and I don’t ever want you to change.”

“Are you-”

“Positive,” he promised, taking a sip from his own black coffee. You always teased him about having terrible taste in coffee but he would just then make fun of you for cream with a hint of coffee, “stop worrying so much.”

“Fine!” you agreed with a laugh, “thank you for suffering through this with me. I love you.”

“I love you too,” he grabbed your cup and took a sip of it and his face almost immediately contorted into a frown, “but I’ll never understand why you like this stuff. That we can always disagree on.”

“Agree to disagree!”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Javier looked around the kitchen and cringed slightly. It looked like a dessert bomb had gone off and exploded all over the place. But at least the cake he’d been making, or attempting to make rather, was in the oven. If he started cleaning now, he theoretically should have everything cleaned up before you got home. You couldn’t kill him if the kitchen was clean, right? He hoped so anyway. 

He grabbed the tea towel and flung it over his shoulder before assessing the situation. While he was making his mental game plan, he was too absorbed in his thoughts to hear you open the door. 

“Javi?” you called out to him softly as you walked to the kitchen, curious as to what the delicious smell was. Unfortunately, he hadn’t heard you, but you found him, standing in the middle of the mess that was your kitchen. Your jaw dropped as you looked around; this was going to take a while to clean properly, “what the hell?”

Your voice was barely above a whisper, as you spoke more to yourself than anything else. This much he heard and he whipped around to look at you with a worried expression, “dulzura, I…you weren’t supposed to be home for another hour!”

“I finished work early,” you could see that he was trying to usher you out of the kitchen, holding out his arms to try and block you from seeing everything. But you’d already seen it all, “Javi-”

“Just…go on and relax and take a shower or something-”

“Javier,” you slipped under his arm so you could see everything up close and personal. You could feel your eye twitch as you took in the crazy scene. You stepped over to the oven and peeked inside - at least that much smelled good, “what is that?”

“Umm…it’s supposed to be a cake…isn’t that obvious?” you looked back at him and found him offering you a nervous, tentative little smile. Your heart melted at that, “I didn’t mean to make such a mess…it just sort of happened. I’m sorry…”

“You made a cake?” you looked at him with wide, soft eyes, “whatever for?”

“For you,” he stated as though it was so obvious. You supposed, really, that it was obvious, “I was just trying to surprise you.”

“That’s…you’re…” you waved your hands around as you tried to find the right words, “I love you. So much.”

Before he could say anything else, you threw your arms around him and pulled him in for a tight hug. It took a moment for his brain to catch up before he hugged you back, “I love you too, Dulzura.”

When you pulled back, you kissed sweetly, leaving him longing for more, “you’re a grump sometimes, you know? But you’re my favorite grump.”

“Hmm,” he hummed in content, “I’ll clean up the mess.”

“Don’t stress about it,” you insisted, “I’ll help you.”

“You don’t-”

“I’ll help you,” you repeated, taking his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze, “okay?”

“Okay,” he agreed, grinning when you grabbed the towel from over his shoulder, “and then cake.”

“And it better be good!”

“And if it’s not?”

“If it’s not…it’ll still be great because you went through all the trouble of making it,” you reassured him, “and you’re really hot so that just makes everything better.”

That caught him off guard and caused him to laugh loudly as you shrugged innocently, “thanks Dulzura. Don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“You’d suffer terribly,” you grabbed another tea towel and tossed it at him, “now let’s get this place clean so we can eat cake!”

[infiniteinquiries]

♡ Coffee shop au in which ellie is a barista and knows you like her so she keeps making you increasingly terrible drinks to see how far she can push you ♡

pt. 3

--------

pt. 1 // pt. 2

At this point, Ellie truly couldn't believe you were back again. Maybe that's why she left the note last time, in hopes the crumb of kindness, and totally not half-sarcastic sharpie imprint would have you come crawling back. She liked the game of it all.

It was 11 AM on a Saturday this time, a lazy late morning hour where the foot traffic was surprisingly at a lull, snowflakes swirling by the windows, and in you came. She couldn't help but curl her lip upward in genuine amusement. She quickly hid it and bit the inside of her cheek scolding herself at the embarassing expression. She hoped you hadn't seen it.

The way you coyly looked to the right at nothing and back at her making brief eye contact said otherwise.

"You again," she looked over her browbone right through you, leaning over the register with her weight braced in her somewhat overly muscular arms for her profession. "What'll it be this time?" Her words once again dripped in a sneering tone, a confident yet subtle smirk painted across her features.

You rocked back on your heels and onto your toes, it was kind of cute she thought to herself.

"Hmm," you paused, one brow raised, "I think I'll do something simple. Could I geeeet...an Americano?" You nodded when you finished your sentence.

Ellie chuckled at the request, this time in a tone a little less frigid, and made sure to make direct eye contact with you. "One overpriced espresso water coming up. That'll be $7." She couldn't believe anyone would pay these prices.

You pulled a different wallet out of your jacket today, slender with--oh--no coin pocket. Ellie bit the inside of her cheek trying not to show her amusement outwardly. You handed her a shiny blue card. She rung you up on the register and handed you back your back the item, making sure to place it in your palm just slow enough that your hands touched for a second. You were warm despite the impossible cold outside. She watched as your eyes widened just a bit. How cute. She loved having this effect on women.

It was a slow day with the weather the way it was, so she took it upon herself to make your drink. As pretentious as the roastery was, they got new ingredients in all the time. When they had gotten a new shipment of Chia seeds in that week, Ellie knew exactly what to do when inevitably came in. She didn't know why she cared so much about seeing you, so she chalked it up to the thrill of it really. How far could she push you until you confronted her?

She expertly maneuvered the espresso machine and flew through the process of making the best americano in town. It was almost a shame she was going to ruin it. Right before she walked up to call your name, she threw a few Chia seeds into the cup, stirring them with a wooden stirrer. That would thicken the drink up to a texture that was just plain awful. In a way, she wanted you to call her out. This "mistake" was particularly bold, even for a novice, which she wasn't.

She brought your drink to the end of the counter and searched the room for you. Scrolling your phone, foot braced against the wall, there you were. She looked you once over, checking out what you wore today. Your coat rested around your shoulders, and underneath was a cut-off t-shirt and some jeans leading into the pair of boots you always wore. It was a little cold for that kind of getup she thought to herself. When her eyes settled back on your face, she saw you making eye contact at her from across the room. Busted.

She called out your name, cheeks burning red as she looked away. All she wanted to do was make an excuse to go to the back now. But of course, being the only one on staff this morning, she couldn't.

"Thanks...Ellie." She heard you say behind her. She noted how you weighed the syllables of her name almost mockingly. When she turned around to look at you, you were taking a sip of her newest concoction and her eyes widened as she realized you were about to try it right in front of her. No plausible deniability now.

She wished you were rounding the corner like usual right now so she didn't have to watch this unfold in real time.

Mid-sip, she heard you make a noticeable yet quiet cough in the back of your throat. Shaking your head, she watched you lean over the counter with a smirk as you set your drink down, your hair bouncing around your features as you moved closer to her, a smug amusement blazing in your eyes.

"You know Ellie, for seven dollars, you'd think this place could make a decent drink."

......

@elliewilliamsgf69 @vgnoxi @bunkisses4u @lovergirlism

[beevean]

I think another reason I don't like the writing in Frontiers is that it feels... egotistical? Like idk the entire air around the games just gives off "Oh here's the game that will save us from the big bad 2010's writing, so praise it!"

Also just how I feel the more dramatic parts feel trying too hard, like when Sonic is slowly being corrupted, I felt next to nothing... the game felt like it was grabbing me by the shoulders and going "See this scene??? See how much pain Sonic is in??? FEEL SOMETHING!!!"

I use the word "pretentious".

Frontiers clearly aims to have a different story than usual. Event-wise, it's pretty paper thin: Sonic rescues his friends and uncovers the mystery of these new islands he's stuck in. No big deal, Sonic games don't need a big complex plot. But unlike, say, Heroes or Generations, Frontiers has little to no levity, the music is bombastic in an attempt to inspire awe and wonder, and it's heavy, heavy on character interactions. Introspections, even. Amy, Tails, Knuckles and Eggman are supposedly eviscerated by the writing, with all their fears and doubts and desires exposed, like a drawn out character analysis and, yes, a blatant rerailment from the terrible Pontaff games. Tails and his arc that is literally "wow I sure sucked in Forces, what was up with that" is the most obvious example of this, but I have talked extensively how Frontiers feels like a huge love letter to SA1 in the worst of ways.

(and the unnecessary dig at Baldy McNosehair that is also the second time in a row from Flynn :\ let it go, man)

Like, alright. Let's be real. Games like ShTH, '06 and Forces wanted to be taken seriously too. They did not succeed at it, for various reasons. And while ShTH makes me laugh for how tonally dissonant it is, and I don't think Forces is as cringe as it was made to look like, I still think '06's story is largely boring and a bit tryhard for the series, although it has a few funny/cute moments. So yes, overly serious games are not new in the series.

But Frontiers really gives me a whole different vibe. Like it doesn't just want to be taken seriously: it wants to be praised as a pivotal moment in the series. Perhaps it's precisely because of how it solely exist to "fix" characters, how it shoves as many references as it could as candy for the old-time fans (when one of the complaints of the Pontaff games was that they felt disconnected), how everything about it, and now I'm also adding the gameplay, feels like it doesn't exist for its own sake, but to be "a step in the right direction". Like that it's the biggest accomplishment it can reach. It's a step in the right direction. It's better than what came before. We are fixing the series. Right?

(I wouldn't mind the attempt to show how Sonic was suffering from the corruption. I genuinely like the scene where Sage keeps questioning Sonic's resolve and he just keeps going with a gritted smile. I sure mind how the game was rushed into giving it a non-conclusion lmao, and Final Horizon didn't really fix things.)

[tanjamikaelson]

STRANGE LOVE - CHAPTER 7

MASTERLIST

CHAPTER 7: | I'M NOT YOUR ENEMY |

Allison stood in her bathroom, the soft glow of the vanity lights reflecting off the mirror as she meticulously applied the finishing touches to her makeup. The anticipation for the Midsummer Party buzzed in the air, but beneath the surface, her emotions were tangled in a web of confusion and excitement. The elegant dress she wore hugged her curves in all the right places, accentuating her natural beauty with a hint of understated sophistication.

When she finally stepped back into her room, she found Kie sitting on her bed, already dressed in a lovely purple gown that flowed around her like a cascade of twilight. Tiny flowers adorned her hair, giving her an ethereal, almost otherworldly beauty.

Allison couldn’t help but gasp in admiration.“Wow, Kie, you look beautiful,” Allison exclaimed, her eyes wide with genuine awe.

Kie’s head turned toward her sister, a smile blooming on her lips as she took in Allison’s appearance. The short, elegant dress Allison wore was the perfect blend of chic and sexy, enhancing her already striking features.

“No, look at you, you look beautiful,” Kie countered, her tone filled with sisterly pride.

Allison returned the smile, a rare moment of mutual appreciation between them. 

She stepped closer to the mirror, turning slightly to admire her reflection. “Thank you,” she said softly, her voice tinged with a hint of self-consciousness that only her sister would notice.

Kie, however, wasn’t in the mood for the festivities. She let out a frustrated sigh, her earlier excitement dampened by the thought of what the evening would entail. “I can’t believe my parents are making me go to this stupid thing,” she grumbled, her tone thick with disdain.

Allison shrugged, trying to be optimistic. “It can be fun,” she offered, though she knew better than anyone how these parties could be—stiff, pretentious, and filled with people who barely noticed each other, too consumed by their own self-importance.

Kie, however, wasn’t swayed. “No, trust me, it can’t,” she insisted. “Too many kooks in one place can never be fun.” The finality in her voice left no room for argument.

Just as the tension between them threatened to resurface, they heard Kie’s mother's voice calling from downstairs, a sharp reminder that the party awaited them. The sisters exchanged a knowing look before heading out, both bracing themselves for the night ahead.

・ • ・ • ・

The Island Club was a dazzling spectacle, the grandeur of the event amplified by the warm, golden lights that adorned the venue. Everything was meticulously arranged, from the tables overflowing with gourmet food to the soft strains of music that filled the air. It was the kind of party where appearances mattered more than connections, and everyone was eager to show off their best.

Kie’s grip on Allison’s hand tightened as they arrived, her anxiety palpable as she scanned the crowd. “Our boys are here,” she said, her eyes lighting up as she spotted Pope and Jordan working at the food station.

Kie wasted no time, dragging Allison toward them with a mischievous grin. The two boys had their backs turned, and focused on their tasks, giving Kie the perfect opportunity to tease them. She leaned in, adopting a playful British accent. “Excuse me, sir. Do we have to shuck these ourselves?” she asked, her voice dripping with faux sophistication.

Both boys turned around, their faces set in annoyed expressions that quickly morphed into laughter when they realized who it was. Allison, catching on to Kie’s game, joined in with her own terrible British accent. “Because it might mess up our costumes,” she added, trying to suppress her giggles.

Jordan and Pope couldn’t help but laugh, their previous frustration melting away as they greeted their friends. 

“We wouldn’t want that now, would we?” Pope said, grinning as he performed the Pogue handshake with Kie. 

Allison opted for a hug with Jordan, her heart skipping a beat when his arms wrapped around her.

“That accent was bad,” Jordan teased as he pulled back, his smile warm and genuine.

“It was. I was gonna let it go,” Kie agreed, still chuckling. But as they looked around, the reality of where they were began to sink in. “You ever seen this many kooks in one place?” Kie asked, her tone tinged with unease.

Pope nodded, his eyes scanning the crowd. “Yeah, last year.”

“We’re in the lion’s den,” Kie muttered, her voice dropping to a near whisper.

“Exactly,” Jordan agreed, his gaze following hers. He then turned back to Allison, his eyes softening as he took in her appearance. “Wow, you look beautiful,” he said, his voice filled with genuine admiration.

Allison blushed, a smile tugging at her lips. “Thank you,” she replied, her heart fluttering at the sincerity in his voice.

Their moment was interrupted by a sudden burst of applause from the crowd. The four of them turned to see the Cameron family making their grand entrance, their presence commanding attention like royalty. Allison’s eyes were immediately drawn to Rafe, who was already deep in conversation with his fellow kooks. He looked every bit the part of the golden boy—handsome, confident, and dangerously charming.

“Here comes Lord Capital and the Exploiters,” Kie muttered, her disdain for the Cameron family evident in every word.

“She’s definitely going to poke somebody’s eyes out with that,” Pope commented, nodding toward Rose’s extravagant headpiece, which seemed to scream for attention.

Allison forced a smile, the tension in her chest tightening as she watched Rafe from across the room. “I’m going to need a drink if I want to get through this party,” she muttered, more to herself than to the others. The idea of facing Rafe in this setting, with so many eyes around, made her uneasy.

Without waiting for a response, Allison excused herself and made her way to the bar. She ordered a glass of white wine, grateful for the slight buzz that came with it. The first glass went down easily, the alcohol soothing her nerves. By the time she was halfway through her second, she had positioned herself across from Jordan, who was still busy at the grill. They exchanged occasional smiles, each one a brief moment of connection in a sea of unfamiliar faces.

Just as Allison was beginning to feel a semblance of calm, she sensed someone approaching from behind. The familiar scent of cologne mixed with the subtle rustle of a suit jacket sent her heart racing. She recognized the light baby blue suit before she even turned her head.

“Hey, Allison,” Rafe’s voice was soft, almost gentle, a far cry from the tense conversations they’d had before.

Allison forced a small smile, her mind scrambling to keep her emotions in check. “Hey,” she replied, her voice steady, though the sight of him so close made her pulse quicken.

Rafe moved to stand directly in front of her, his eyes searching hers with an intensity that made her stomach flip. “Are you going to talk to me now?” he asked, his tone laced with an undercurrent of something that sounded like regret.

“It’s not like I didn’t talk to you when you came to the restaurant,” Allison countered, looking up at him through her lashes. He seemed different tonight—sober, almost vulnerable.

“Yeah, you did,” Rafe nodded, his gaze dropping to the floor for a moment before he looked back at her. “But are you still mad at me?”

Allison downed the rest of her drink, the alcohol giving her the courage to speak her mind. “We should talk somewhere else. Meet me in the locker room in five minutes.”

Rafe nodded, his expression unreadable as he watched her walk away. He knew Jordan was watching them, and the idea of provoking him brought a twisted smile to his lips. Finishing his drink, Rafe headed inside, his mind already racing with possibilities.

The locker room was dimly lit, the quiet hum of the fluorescent lights the only sound as Allison paced nervously. Her heart pounded in her chest, each beat a reminder of the conflicted feelings she had for Rafe. She wasn’t sure what she wanted—whether this conversation would bring closure or pull her deeper into something she wasn’t ready to face.

A knock on the door pulled her from her thoughts. 

“It’s me,” Rafe’s voice came from the other side, the familiar drawl sending a shiver down her spine.

Allison unlocked the door, letting him and she quickly closed the door before turning back to Rafe. “Did anyone see you?” she asked, her voice low and cautious.

Rafe shrugged, leaning casually against the wall. “I don’t think so. What, you don’t want to be seen with me?” His tone was light, teasing, but there was an edge to it that made Allison’s stomach twist.

“I don’t think that would be a good thing,” Allison muttered, avoiding his gaze. The idea of anyone finding out about them sent a wave of panic through her.

“Because your little Pogue friends wouldn’t like it,” Rafe stated, his voice dripping with contempt.

Allison let out a bitter laugh, the irony of the situation not lost on her. “I’m sleeping with the enemy,” she remarked, the words tasting bitter on her tongue.

“I’m not your enemy,” Rafe told her, stepping closer, his eyes locked onto hers.

Allison met his gaze, the sincerity in his blue eyes catching her off guard. But as much as she wanted to believe him, the truth of their situation weighed heavily on her. She sighed, looking down at the floor, her emotions a tangled mess. “Maybe we should stop seeing each other,” she suggested, though her voice lacked conviction. Deep down, she wasn’t sure if she really wanted to end things with Rafe.

Rafe chuckled, a sound that was both amused and frustrated. “That’s not gonna happen,” he said, his voice firm, as if the very idea was absurd.

Allison looked up at him, his proximity making her heart race. He was so close now, she could feel the heat radiating off him. “Rafe,” she began, but her words faltered when he gently placed his hand on her jawline, his thumb brushing lightly against her cheek.

“You don’t really want that,” Rafe said softly, his voice a low, hypnotic murmur that sent shivers down her spine. “You’re just scared of what the Pogues will think.”

And he was right. As much as she hated to admit it, that was exactly what she was afraid of. The thought of her friends finding out about her and Rafe—especially Jordan and Kie—filled her with a deep sense of dread. She could already imagine their looks of betrayal, the accusations, the disappointment. But there was something about Rafe that pulled her in, something she couldn’t easily walk away from.

“Then… can we at least keep this a secret?” Allison asked, her voice barely above a whisper. She wasn’t ready to give him up, but she also wasn’t ready to deal with the fallout.

Rafe hesitated for a moment, his eyes searching hers. He didn’t like the idea of sneaking around, and didn’t like sharing her attention with anyone else, especially the Pogues. But he also knew that this was the only way to keep seeing her. He finally nodded, his hand still cradling her face. “Okay, as long as I get to see you, we can keep it a secret.”

Allison was surprised by his willingness to compromise, a smile slowly spreading across her lips. “Really?” she asked, a mix of relief and disbelief in her voice.

“Yeah, really,” Rafe confirmed, his own smile tugging at the corners of his mouth, "Now before I change my mind.”

Before Allison could respond, he swiftly lifted her off the floor, his hands gripping her thighs as he pinned her against the wall. Allison gasped in surprise, but her legs instinctively wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer.

Rafe’s lips crashed against hers in a hungry, desperate kiss, their tongues battling for dominance. He could feel the tension in her body, the way she melted into him, and it only fueled his desire. His hands roamed up her sides, his fingers digging into her skin as if he couldn’t get close enough.

Without breaking the kiss, Rafe carried her over to the counter, setting her down as he positioned himself between her legs. His hands slid up her thighs, pushing the fabric of her dress higher as he explored her skin. Allison’s breath hitched when his fingers brushed against her, her own hands tangling in his hair as she pulled him closer.

But then she broke the kiss, her breath coming in ragged gasps. “Someone will notice we’re gone,” she whispered, though her words lacked any real urgency. The last thing she wanted right now was to stop.

“Then we better make it quick,” Rafe replied, his lips already trailing down her neck, leaving a trail of heat in their wake. He sucked gently at the sensitive spot just below her ear, and Allison couldn’t help the soft moan that escaped her lips.

“Sure you won’t be begging for more?” Allison teased, though her voice was already thick with arousal.

Rafe’s hand moved to her throat, his grip firm but gentle as he brought his lips to her ear. “After I’m done with you, you’ll be the one begging for more,” he whispered, his breath hot against her skin, making her shiver.

His hand slid beneath her dress, his fingers finding their way to her panties. He could feel the heat radiating from her, the wetness that betrayed how much she wanted him. With a smirk, he slipped his finger beneath the fabric, teasing her entrance with slow, deliberate strokes.

Allison gasped, her head falling back against the wall as Rafe continued to torment her with feather-light touches. Her fingers tightened in his hair, her body arching toward him, silently begging for more. But Rafe was in no rush. He wanted to savor every moment, every reaction he pulled from her.

He hooked his fingers around the waistband of her panties, sliding them down her legs and tossing them aside. The cool air hit her skin, sending a shiver through her, but it was quickly replaced by the warmth of Rafe’s mouth as he kissed his way down her inner thigh.

Without warning, Rafe dropped to his knees, his hands spreading her legs wider as he positioned himself between them. He pressed a kiss to her thigh, then moved closer, his breath hot against her center. The anticipation was almost unbearable, but when his tongue finally flicked out to taste her, the pleasure was immediate and overwhelming.

Allison’s hands flew to the counter behind her, trying to steady herself as Rafe worked his magic. His tongue moved against her with a skill that left her breathless, teasing her clit with quick, light strokes before dipping lower to taste her fully. She moaned, her head falling back as she lost herself in the sensation.

Rafe gripped her thighs, pulling her closer as he intensified his efforts. He lifted her legs over his shoulders, giving him better access, and the angle allowed him to reach her in ways that made her toes curl. His tongue and fingers worked in perfect unison, driving her closer and closer to the edge with every movement.

Allison’s breath came in ragged gasps, her fingers digging into the counter as she tried to hold on. But it was no use—Rafe knew exactly what she needed, and he wasn’t going to stop until he had her falling apart in his hands.

“Rafe,” she breathed out, her voice thick with need. “Don’t stop.”

Rafe’s response was a low, satisfied hum against her skin, the vibrations sending shockwaves of pleasure through her. He pumped his fingers inside her, alternating between long, slow strokes and quick, hard thrusts that made her whole body tremble. Her whimpers grew more erratic, each one a sign that she was getting closer, and Rafe could feel the tension building inside her.

“You’re so fucking hot,” Rafe growled against her, his voice rough with desire. The sight of her, the sound of her, everything about this moment was driving him wild.

Allison’s moans grew louder, more desperate, as she felt the waves of her orgasm approaching. She was on the brink, her body taut with anticipation, and when Rafe finally pushed her over the edge, it was with a cry that echoed through the locker room.

“Fuck,” Allison gasped, her body shuddering as the orgasm washed over her. Rafe didn’t let up, his mouth and fingers working her through every last tremor until she was spent, her legs trembling around his shoulders.

He kept his mouth on her, his pace slowing as he savored the taste of her, the way her muscles contracted around his fingers. He watched with satisfaction as her body slowly stilled, the aftershocks of her climax leaving her breathless and boneless against the counter.

When she finally sighed, her body going limp, Rafe withdrew his fingers and gently unhooked her legs from his shoulders. He stood, helping her sit upright on the edge of the counter, his eyes locked on hers as he licked his fingers clean, a satisfied smirk playing on his lips.

“I need you inside me,” Allison whispered, her voice still weak from the intensity of her orgasm. Her hands moved to the waistband of his pants, unzipping them with urgency.

Rafe raised an eyebrow, his smirk widening. “Are you sure? We’ve been in here for at least 15 minutes already,” he teased, though he made no move to stop her as she pulled his pants and boxers down.

“I don’t care, Rafe,” Allison replied, her voice filled with need. She wanted him, needed him, and nothing else mattered at that moment.

Rafe chuckled, loving the way she was so desperate for him. “You’re making it really hard to say no,” he said, his tone dripping with amusement.

Allison didn’t respond. Instead, she pulled him closer, capturing his lips in a heated kiss as her hand wrapped around his erection. She stroked him slowly, savoring the feel of him, the way he throbbed beneath her touch.

Rafe moaned into her mouth, his hips instinctively bucking against her hand. But he quickly regained control, grabbing her wrist and stopping her movements.

Allison wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer as she parted her legs for him. Rafe positioned himself at her entrance, his eyes locking onto hers as he slowly pushed inside.

The feeling was electric, the heat of their connection almost too much to bear. Rafe groaned as he felt her tightness envelop him, and Allison inhaled sharply, her nails digging into his shoulders as he filled her completely.

Rafe didn’t waste any time, his hips moving in a steady rhythm that quickly became more frantic. His lips found her neck, biting and sucking at the tender flesh as he drove into her with increasing intensity. Allison’s head fell back, her mouth open in a silent cry of pleasure as he hit that perfect spot inside her over and over again. Every thrust sent shockwaves of pleasure rippling through her body, her senses overwhelmed by the sheer intensity of it all.

Rafe’s grip on her waist tightened as he pounded into her, his breath hot against her ear. The sound of their bodies coming together, the heat, the pressure—it all built into something almost primal. He was rough and relentless, and Allison couldn’t get enough. The way he moved, the way he claimed her, it was intoxicating.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” Rafe growled, his voice thick with lust. He could feel her walls clenching around him, her body responding to every movement, and it drove him wild. He wanted to lose himself in her, to forget everything else, and for those moments, nothing else existed but them.

Allison’s moans grew louder, more desperate, as she felt another orgasm building inside her. She couldn’t hold back, couldn’t stop the way her body reacted to him. The pleasure was too much, too overwhelming, and she was powerless against it.

“Rafe… I’m so close,” she gasped, her hands clawing at his back, urging him on. She needed him to push her over the edge, to send her spiraling into that blissful oblivion.

Rafe responded by thrusting even harder, his hips snapping against hers with a force that made her see stars. The friction, the pressure, it was all too much. With a final, powerful thrust, he sent her crashing into her climax, her body convulsing around him as waves of ecstasy tore through her.

Allison cried out his name, her voice echoing through the locker room as her orgasm ripped through her. Her body shook with the intensity of it, every nerve ending alight with pleasure. She clung to him, her nails digging into his skin as she rode out the aftershocks, her breaths coming in ragged gasps.

Rafe watched her come undone, the sight of her in the throes of pleasure pushing him to the brink. He could feel his own release building, the tension coiling tight in his core. With a low groan, he buried himself inside her one last time, his hips stuttering as he came hard, his release filling her completely.

The room was filled with the sound of their heavy breathing, their bodies trembling as they came down from the high. Rafe remained inside her for a moment longer, savoring the warmth and the intimacy of the moment, before finally pulling out. Allison whimpered softly at the loss, her body still buzzing with the remnants of her pleasure.

“Rafe, I don’t think I can stand,” Allison murmured, a lazy smile on her lips as she looked up at him through half-lidded eyes. She felt weak, her legs still trembling from the intensity of their encounter.

Rafe chuckled, clearly pleased with himself. “That’s the point,” he said, his voice laced with smug satisfaction. He crouched down, retrieving her panties from the floor and rolling them back up her legs. “Don’t forget these,” he added with a wink, making her smile.

“Thanks,” Allison said, her voice soft as she leaned against the counter for support. Rafe’s touch was gentle as he kissed her thigh, sending another shiver down her spine. His hands lingered on her hips for a moment, his eyes dark with a mix of possessiveness and satisfaction.

He helped her back to her feet, holding her steady as she regained her strength. “I hope this happens again soon,” Allison confessed, her voice low as she met his gaze. Despite everything, despite the complications, she knew she wasn’t ready to give him up.

“Oh, yeah?” Rafe smirked, his eyes glinting with amusement.

“Get that smirk off your face,” Allison playfully swatted his shoulder, though she couldn’t help the smile that tugged at her lips.

“You’re making it really hard to do so,” Rafe replied, his tone teasing as he followed her to the sink. They washed their hands in silence, the tension between them now replaced by a comfortable intimacy. The air was thick with the scent of sex and sweat, a reminder of what they had just shared.

As Allison finished washing up, she turned to see Rafe fixing his hair in the mirror, trying to smooth out the mess they’d made of it. She was about to leave the locker room when a voice suddenly cut through the quiet, startling them both.

“What are you guys doing here?” Sarah’s voice was sharp, laced with suspicion as she stood in the doorway, her eyes narrowing as she took in the sight of her brother and Allison together.

“Oh, great,” Rafe muttered under his breath, rolling his eyes as he turned to face his sister.

Allison’s heart skipped a beat, panic rising in her chest as she realized they’d been caught. She quickly composed herself, trying to appear nonchalant, but the tension in the room was palpable.

“Topper and Kelce were looking for you,” Sarah said, her gaze flicking between them with a mixture of curiosity and suspicion.

Rafe nodded, brushing past her without another word, clearly eager to avoid further questioning. “Yeah, I’ll go find them,” he mumbled as he made his way out of the room, leaving Allison alone with Sarah.

Allison was about to make her own exit when Sarah’s voice stopped her in her tracks. “Are you sleeping with my brother?” Sarah asked, her tone blunt and accusatory.

Allison hesitated, unsure of how to respond. She knew Sarah could be a problem if she decided to spill the truth. After a moment, Allison took a deep breath and gave the only answer she could. “Let’s keep this between us,” she said quietly, meeting Sarah’s gaze with a look that was both pleading and firm.

Sarah raised an eyebrow, clearly surprised by the admission. But after a tense moment, she nodded. “Fine,” she replied, though her tone suggested she wasn’t entirely convinced. “But be careful. Rafe’s… complicated.”

Allison nodded, grateful for the warning even though she already knew it all too well. She quickly made her way out of the locker room, her heart still pounding in her chest. She was relieved that Sarah had agreed to keep quiet, but the encounter had shaken her. She knew she was playing with fire, and it was only a matter of time before she got burned.

・ • ・ • ・

When Allison finally made her way back outside, she spotted Jessica and her boyfriend Brandon dancing on the grass, looking blissfully carefree. She approached them with a forced smile, trying to shake off the lingering tension from her encounter with Sarah.

“Hey, guys. I hope I’m not interrupting,” Allison said, her voice light as she joined them.

Jessica turned to her with a wide smile, immediately pulling Allison into a hug. “Heyyy, girl! I know we haven't seen each other in the last couple of days, but my birthday is coming up, and you’re invited.”

Allison returned the hug, genuinely pleased to hear the news. “That’s great. I’m definitely coming,” she replied, though her mind was still reeling from everything that had happened tonight.

Jessica pulled back, eyeing Allison with a mischievous grin. “And bring that date that ruined your makeup,” she teased, her tone playful.

“What?” Allison asked, momentarily confused.

Jessica laughed. “You were kissing someone, obviously. Your makeup is a bit smudged.”

“Fuck, I didn’t bring anything to fix it,” Allison muttered, suddenly self-conscious.

Jessica gave her a knowing look, clearly intrigued. “I got you, girl. If you tell me who it is,” she said, her tone conspiratorial.

Allison hesitated, biting her lip as she considered her options. She knew she couldn’t afford to let this secret slip, but Jessica was one of her closest friends. Maybe she could trust her—at least a little. “I can’t. It’s supposed to be a secret,” she finally admitted, her voice low.

“A secret lover, hmm?” Jessica’s eyes sparkled with curiosity. “Is he older? Married or something?”

“No,” Allison quickly denied, shaking her head. “He’s… he’s kind of my secret.”

“Your secret?” Jessica’s interest was clearly piqued. “So you have one more guy you’re seeing.”

Allison groaned, feeling the pressure of Jessica’s persistence. “It’s more complicated than that.”

“Just tell me, please. I won’t tell anyone,” Jessica pleaded, her expression earnest.

Allison sighed, knowing she had to give her friend something. “Fine, but not here,” she said, glancing around to make sure no one else was within earshot. “But if you tell anyone, including Brandon, I’m literally going to kill you.”

“Your secret is safe with me,” Jessica promised, her voice filled with excitement as Allison led her to a more secluded area to fix her makeup.

As Jessica worked on touching up Allison’s makeup, she couldn’t contain her curiosity any longer. “Okay, we’re done. Now tell me who’s the lucky guy—or guys.”

Allison hesitated again, knowing this was a dangerous line to cross. But Jessica was her friend, and she needed to confide in someone. She leaned in closer, lowering her voice to a whisper. “Rafe.”

Jessica’s eyes widened in shock, her mouth falling open in disbelief. “Rafe Cameron?” she exclaimed, her voice a bit too loud for Allison’s liking.

“Be quiet, Jessica!” Allison hissed, her heart racing as she looked around to make sure no one had heard.

“Sorry,” Jessica quickly apologized, though her shock was still evident. “But seriously, you and him?”

Allison nodded, biting her lip as she glanced at Jessica. “Yeah, me and him.”

Jessica looked both astonished and intrigued, her eyes sparkling with a mix of excitement and disbelief. “And I thought you didn’t like him.”

Allison sighed, running a hand through her hair as she tried to explain. “Well... one thing led to another, and here we are,” she admitted, her voice tinged with resignation. “But it’s nothing serious. We’re just hooking up.”

Jessica shook her head, still trying to wrap her mind around the idea. “Wow, I just never would have guessed... Rafe Cameron. So, how is it? Is he, like, really good in bed, like everybody says?” she asked, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper.

Allison blushed, the memories of their encounters flashing through her mind. “Yeah,” she admitted, her voice soft. “He is. But it’s more complicated than that.”

Jessica raised an eyebrow, clearly intrigued. “Complicated how?”

“It’s just... I don’t know, there’s something about him. He’s intense, and sometimes he’s sweet, but then there’s this other side of him... it’s like he’s constantly fighting something,” Allison confessed, her voice dropping as she tried to articulate the complicated feelings she had for Rafe.

Jessica nodded, understanding dawning in her eyes. “I get it. He’s a lot to handle. But if it’s just a fling, you don’t have to worry about all that, right?”

Allison nodded, though deep down she knew it wasn’t that simple. The truth was, she was starting to feel something for Rafe, something that went beyond just physical attraction. But she wasn’t ready to admit that, not even to herself.

“Yeah, you’re right,” Allison said, forcing a smile as she pushed those thoughts aside. “It’s just a fling.”

Jessica gave her a supportive smile, sensing that Allison didn’t want to dive too deep into the topic. “Well, whatever it is, I’m here for you. And your secret is safe with me, I promise.”

“Thanks, Jessica,” Allison replied, genuinely relieved to have someone she could talk to about this. It felt good to have a friend who could listen without judgment, even if she couldn’t tell her everything.

With her makeup fixed and her secret safe, Allison felt a little more at ease. She said goodbye to Jessica and rejoined the party, determined to enjoy the rest of the night.

・ • ・ • ・

As Allison made her way back to the party, she passed by the grill where Jordan was still busy preparing food. The sight of him brought a smile to her face, and she couldn’t resist the urge to walk over and say hi.

“Hey, did you try our famous oysters?” Jordan asked, his eyes lighting up as she approached.

“Oh, I still didn’t. Sorry,” Allison replied, feeling a bit guilty for not having tried any yet.

“Well, you can now,” Jordan said with a grin, handing her a plate with a few oysters on it.

Allison took a bite, her eyes widening in surprise. “That’s really good, chef,” she told him, genuinely impressed by the flavor.

Jordan smiled, clearly pleased with her reaction. “Wait till you see what else I’m good at in the kitchen.”

Allison laughed, a playful glint in her eyes. “Can’t wait.”

But the lighthearted moment was quickly interrupted when Jordan’s expression turned serious. “What did Rafe want earlier?” he asked suddenly, his tone filled with concern.

“What?” Allison almost choked on her food, her heart skipping a beat at the unexpected question.

“When you were standing over there,” Jordan pointed to the spot where she had been before leaving to meet Rafe in the locker room, “He came up to you, but you quickly left.”

“Oh...” Allison sighed, quickly trying to think of an explanation. “Nothing important.”

“I mean, if he is bothering you—” Jordan started, his voice filled with a protective edge.

“No, no,” Allison shook her head, cutting him off before he could continue. “He wasn’t bothering me, don’t worry.”

Jordan studied her for a moment, his concern still evident, but he finally nodded. “Okay, if you’re sure.”

Just then, Kie’s voice called from behind them, breaking the tension. “There you are. I was looking for you.”

“Everything okay?” Allison asked, turning to face her sister.

“No, I hate this party,” Kie said with a dramatic sigh. “I need my sister to make it not so boring.”

“What can I do?” Allison asked, eager to help distract Kie from her frustration.

“Dance with me,” Kie replied, grabbing Allison’s hands and pulling her away from Jordan and the grill.

The two sisters joined the crowd on the dance floor, letting the music wash over them as they moved together. Other girls joined in, and for a moment, Allison felt herself getting lost in the rhythm, her worries and secrets fading into the background.

But as they danced, Kie noticed something on Allison’s neck. Her eyes narrowed as she leaned closer to get a better look.

“What’s that on your neck?” Kie asked, her voice filled with suspicion. “Looks like a red mark.”

Allison’s hand instinctively flew to her neck, trying to cover the hickey that Rafe had left earlier. “Probably just a mosquito bite,” she replied quickly, hoping to brush it off.

Kie gave her a skeptical look, but she didn’t press the issue. Still, the mark didn’t look like a mosquito bite to her, and it made her wonder if someone had been making marks on Allison’s neck—and that someone wasn’t Jordan, since he had been outside the whole time.

After their impromptu dance session, the sisters made their way to the porch, where Kie’s parents were standing. They were just about to join them when a commotion broke out near the entrance of the club.

Allison and Kie turned just in time to see JJ being dragged out of the club by a security guard. JJ, being his usual mischievous self, was making a scene, his voice loud and full of bravado as he addressed the onlookers.

“It’s okay, everybody! Do not panic. Leave it to the men and women in uniform. Let’s hear it for them,” JJ called out, his tone dripping with sarcasm as he pointed dramatically at the security guard. Then, with a grin, he added, “Rose! You look like Lady Liberty.”

“Let go of him!” Kie shouted, her voice cutting through the crowd as she rushed toward JJ. Her outburst earned everyone’s attention, and all eyes turned to the spectacle unfolding before them. “You can’t boot him! I invited him here.”

“Kiara, stop it,” her parents tried to intervene, their voices stern, but Kie wasn’t having it.

“I’m a member of this club,” Kie declared, her voice defiant as she stood her ground.

Allison noticed Rafe standing nearby, watching the scene with a smirk on his face, clearly amused by the chaos. The sight of him made her stomach twist, a mix of anger and something else she couldn’t quite name.

Kie’s intervention gave JJ the perfect opportunity to push the security guard away, causing him to stumble into a nearby table. “Sorry about that,” JJ said with mock sincerity before turning to the Pogues. “Hey, mandatory power hour at Rixon’s. Kie, Pope, Jordan, and Allison, you as well. All right? Rixon’s Cove. Let’s roll. All right, Kie, come on. Workers of the world unite. Throw off your chains!”

Kie ran toward her friends, laughing as she threw her arms around JJ, the tension from earlier melting away in the face of their shared rebellion.

Allison was about to follow when she felt a hand grab her shoulder. She turned to find Rafe standing there, his expression hard. “You can’t go with them,” he said, his voice low and commanding.

Allison stared at him, her own anger bubbling to the surface. “Yeah, I can,” she shot back defiantly, shrugging off his hand before turning and running to join the other Pogues.

Rafe watched her go, his jaw clenching in frustration. He downed the rest of his drink, his eyes narrowing as he watched Allison disappear into the crowd with her friends.

Tag list: @tiaamberxx

[birdiely]

Something Uniquely Human

Chapter 2 boys let's go (Chapter 1) (ao3 link)

Doctor, I Can't Tell If I'm Not Me

One way to absolve his crime.

Of all the things he expected to happen after speaking with the lizard, this had to be the worst possible option. There aren't a lot of things that could bother Bill Cipher; there's no form of torture, no violent act or psychological horror that could sway him when he's made up his mind. And believe him, people have tried. He laughs in the face of his torturers, sometimes giving them advice because they clearly don't know how to torture people effectively. 

But this–this was unlike anything he had ever endured. Alone in a white room, his only company a single mirror and the various inspirational posters the wardens with the audacity to call themselves nurses had put up for him, he lay on his bed staring at the blank ceiling. He replayed his conversation with that stupid reptile over and over again. Honestly he thought it had gone pretty well, there wasn't much more he could've said to make himself look good. It wasn't his fault Axie’s a pretentious, holier than thou, self-righteous, know it all, moron. 

Every day was exactly the same. Talk therapy, group therapy, arts and crafts, puppet hour, reflection time, talk therapy, group therapy, arts and crafts, puppet hour, reflection time. The only thing that ever broke up the never ending cycle of people poking around at his business was the surprise checkups. Which was just more people poking around at his business, honestly, but at least this time he could get them to stick the IV in and leave him alone. 

His train of thought halted when he heard the knock at the door. “Patient 63205? This is nurse Premolaris, I'm coming in.” Bill sighed and sat up. Here we go again. “Good evening 63205, how are we today?” Premolaris was probably his favorite of all the nurses and therapists around this awful place. That's not to say that he liked her by any means, it's just that she's the least terrible. She had a toothy smile a little too large for her face, and 8 eyes stacked on top of eachother. Bill thought that that was too many features for one face, one eye had served him just fine for longer than her species had even existed. “Terrible. I hate it here.” He answered her flatly, rubbing his face and she wheeled in a cart of medical supplies. She hummed in thought at his response. “Have you been doing your positive affirmations?” She sat down on a small stool and typed something into a holographic pad in front of her. It faced away from him and he couldn't tell what was being written down, he just knew he resented it. 

“Oh, of course! Everyday I stare at myself in the mirror and tell myself what a pretty princess I am!” He clasped his hands together and kicked his short legs back and forth off the bed sarcastically. “Please. If there was anything good worth saying about myself I would know it already.” He dropped the act with that and crossed his arms, looking away from her. “Now, Bill,” the use of his real name took him aback a bit, “You know very well that that isn't the purpose of positive affirmations. Having knowledge, and being convinced of something are two very separate ideas.” He huffed. She put the cold metal of her stethoscope up to the closest area he had to a chest. It made him shiver. “Remember what you learned about self deprecation? Give me your arm,” She wrapped the stethoscope around her neck and held out her hand. He rolled his eyes but held out his arm surprisingly willingly this time, and Premolaris put a small clamp over his index finger. She continued as she read the data on the screen, “What you s-” Bill cut her off, “What you say about yourself you believe about yourself. Blah blah blah, I know.” She looked at him with a disappointed expression, but didn't linger on the subject anymore. He cringed internally. He was so sick of people looking at him like that; that terrible mix of disappointment and pity, it was driving him nuts. 

She typed something in again and removed the clamp, and he retracted his hand. “Well 63205, I'm going to be honest with you. I personally do not see you leaving any time soon.” “Wow, thanks.” He answered in an exasperated, monotone voice. “However,” she emphasized, “Somebody special has requested to see you.” Now that got his attention. A requested visit? Somebody special? Who in the multiverse would willingly visit Bill Cipher? Certainly not those backstabbing henchmaniacs, they haven't come to see him once. Although he couldn't totally blame them, he wouldn't willingly visit this place either, regardless of who was inside. Before he could ask any of the many questions plaguing him though, she stood up with a sigh, gathered her things and started to leave. “Have a good rest of your day, 63205. I'll see you in the morning.” The door opened and closed behind her quietly. And he was left alone with his thoughts again. 

When night finally came he couldn't bring himself to sleep. Sleep had become one of his dominant coping mechanisms for the draining dullness of his everyday, and yet he couldn't stop his mind from running through a list of everyone he knew. As the night dragged on, he could hear the night shift workers outside his door. He thought again about Premolaris' sentence, and the context she said it in. And suddenly, like a freight train, the realization hit him all at once. The only person in any dimension that would want to speak to him about leaving the theraprism, it couldn't have been more obvious. He internally cursed at himself for becoming just as slow as all the other knock off villains in this place. And suddenly he was more eager than ever to get to sleep. He closed his eye trying to force his consciousness away.  

—---------------------------------------

A different form, a different time.

He fluttered his eye open, giddy like a little kid when he saw absolutely nothing. The small, padded room he had grown somewhat used to seeing was replaced with deep space and distant star clusters. Before him rested the Axolotl. He held an unreadable expression, and patiently waited for Bill to fully come to. Oh this was going to be so easy. All Bill had to do was recite all the big therapy words he memorized, tell a good sob story, and fain repentance. He had to fight to keep the smug look off his face. 

“Bill Cipher.” The Axolotl's voice echoed out into the void, reverberating off of Bill. “How has therapy been treating you?” “Oh, it's been great, Axie. I really feel like a new triangle.” Bill said, adjusting his bow tie. “This is good to hear. Although some have said you are having trouble, is this true?” “Psh, of course not.” Bill waved him off. “You know me, Ax, I'm the best patient they have. I'm running circles around all those other wannabes.” He stretched out his hand to look at his nonexistent nails. The Axolotl hummed at that. That's never a good sign. “Self improvement is not a competition, Bill, there is no trophy of gold. Perhaps you are not as ready as I have been told.” “What?!” He cleared his throat–as if that makes sense–and tried to regain his composure. “I just- I meant I'm making so much progress it could be considered a sport. Not that it is-! Figure of speech, y'know?” Nailed it. 

“Ah, I see. In that case I have summoned you to bear you one final word, only good news, rest assured.” “Lay it on me, Axie.” “To earn your freedom, one final test. However be warned, failure means eternal rest.” For just a moment Bill let his concern wash over his face before scrunching it back into its calm and collected facade. What in any world did that mean? failure means eternal rest? What, is he going to actually kill him if he screws this up? He decided not to worry about that, though. How could he possibly screw it up? He always had some cheat or scam, there's no way. 

“What kind of test..?” He questioned. Though some part of him didn't want to know. “A record of all those who you have burned; to gain your freedom, first forgiveness must be earned.” You have got to be kidding. “Forgiveness? Hey, don't worry about it, big guy. I totally forgive you for locking me away in prison against my will.” A little cockiness sneaked its way into his tone. “That is not what I meant.” “Ehh, worth a shot. So who is this final boss anyway?” “The choice is yours, but wise may your choice be, not all will grant you such mercy.” 

What a joke. Gaining anyone's forgiveness would be the easiest task he could think of. Who wouldn't forgive him, he's so charming? And it's not like he's done anything actually wrong, humans in particular just tended to be extra sensitive. Speaking of: his choice definitely needed to be human. It was so easy to trick those flesh bags it was almost comical. He ran through a mental list of all the humans he had met, but quickly had to narrow it down to the ones who were still even alive. The Axolotl could visibly see the light bulb go off in his head as he came to his conclusion. 

“Stanford Pines, 21st century.” He declared with pride. Of course he had to choose good ol Fordsy. He was reliably consistent, malleable, and oh so gullible. If he wasn't senile by now he could easily fall back on old tricks; Ford's almost crippling insecurities and need to feel important was too great to withstand Bill's attention. A couple well placed compliments and reassurance and Ford would practically be begging to make another deal. He almost felt bad for slipping right under Axie’s nose like that. Almost. 

“And you are sure this is the being you wish to meet? It may not be as simple as you think. For if trouble should befall you in this land, I will no longer be here to hold your hand.” The Axolotl warned, but he was quickly brushed off by Bill's unwavering self confidence. “Yeah, yeah, yeah I get it. Improvement takes time, forgiveness is earned not taken, yak, yak, yak. I've heard this all 100 times over, Ax. Just snap your fingers and let's make this happen, yeah?” The Axolotl sighed at his impatience. “Very well. To truly know your old friend's woes, you will walk among them, one or their own.” “Wait, what?” “This is your final warning, a message to heed; Gain forgiveness or cease to be. May your journey be successful, I wish you well in your new vessel.” “New vessel? Now wait just a minute, Axie, what're you…” But before he could even finish his sentence, let alone process Axie’s, he felt his vision blur and his consciousness slip out from under him. 

—---------------------------------------

His whole body ached and his head was spinning. He attempted to open his eye but was met with the blinding light of the sun directly over him. He closed his eye again, screwing it shut to block out the blazing rays. At the very least he knew he successfully made it to earth. He groaned and rubbed his face, laying on his back. Wait a minute. No, that wasn't right. He dragged his hands over his face, feeling every bump and divot in utter bewilderment. A large structure protruded from the middle of his face, and underneath it he found two flaps covering a chasm. He recognized this layout of features, and the realization of what was happening horrified him. It was the kind of softness and roundness he only felt while possessing a human being. But there was no way, no possible way the Axolotl would do that to him, right? He opened his eye-eyes-again, this time careful not to stare directly into the sun. If he really is somehow in a human body he'll have plenty of time for that later. 

He looked around himself, taking a minute to adjust to the new found depth perception. Tall trees and warm grass surrounded him, though the grass itched his skin. With another groan he attempted to sit up, he felt the pull of gravity firmly take hold of him and try to force him back down. His stomach lurched and the world spun around at a dizzying speed. He closed his eyes again and held his face in his hands, both to stop the vertigo, and to completely focus on not vomiting in the grass. 

He cursed at himself for being naive enough to believe that ugly salamander, of course this would happen. He always has to twist his word and bend the truth in some way. Not too much unlike Bill, but it was different when it was happening to him! He tried to open only one of his eyes, at least to get a better look at his surroundings, but the vertigo wasn't any better with one eye closed. He propped himself up with hands and fought with his stomach to stand on wobbly legs. He held out his hands for balance like a newborn deer. He only got a few steps away before his knees buckled under him and sent him crashing unceremoniously to the ground, landing on his knees harshly. The sudden drop was the final straw for his stomach and he doubled over, throwing up in the small clearing. He stumbled backwards off of knees to be fully sitting back down so he didn't land face first in it. 

There was absolutely no way this was happening. Was this some kind of sick prank? Did humans seriously live like this every day? This was disgusting. It felt completely different to possessing a human. There was a barrier then, an obvious distinction between the body and Bill. But now he could feel every automatic process his body maintained to keep itself alive. Every expansion of his lungs, every beat of his heart, the acid bubbling in his stomach. It was almost overwhelming. 

He thought about the Axolotl's words, “Gain forgiveness or cease to be…I wish you well in your new vessel.” He felt his puny heart jump in his chest. Ew. The sound of it filled his ears, it made him feel even more sick. He really did have no choice. He needed to find Sixer and get this over with or that was that for him. His heart picked up the pace at the thought, he grimaced at the feeling. He lay back down in the scratchy and hard ground. The heat of the sun was so warm. He felt exhausted and everything hurt so bad. He closed his eyes as his breathing slowed, wondering if he would ever be himself again before he passed out.

[coulsons-fullmetal-cellist]

The Jealousy of Dieter Bravo

(Dieter Bravo x horror lover female reader)

Summary: Back in the world with horror loving reader, Dieter gets jealous when you start working with a hot new actor

Check out masterlist here

Warning: Dieter being grumpy, some swearing, a cookie gets sacrificed

Notes: Reader is Australian but not the stereotypical sort

Dieter Bravo hated a lot of people; people in general were stupid, fake, and self-centred. Up and coming actor Jagar Aldritch was the latest person on his list of people he hated. His totally non-biased opinion of the hip new actor was that that he was a pretentious prick.

He generally avoided reading any type of media relating about other actors, especially this jerk, except for this one article. Only because it was about a film you were working on: Hyde Away with Dr. J was a new modern take on Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. This stupid actor with an even stupider name spent the whole article waffling on about going all method. Dieter thought actors who went method were compensating for something.

“I struggled with the juxtaposition of the duality of the character but managed to adhere to the contrast of man and monster”

What the fuck did that mean? And not once did he mention the hours of sitting in the makeup chair while you worked your magic to create half his character. Total prick.

Dieter just happened to be visiting on set for the last day of filming. He was planning to surprise you with a little celebration, and actual celebration of dinner at a nice restaurant, not his normal celebration. He grumbled around looking for you, then he heard your beautiful laughter.

You were there with that prick, being absolutely professional, wiping your elaborate makeup off his stupid chiselled face.

 “And there we go! No more being stuck under a mask anymore!”

Damn it, you were being a ray of sunshine while that idiot flashed his probably veneered teeth at you.

“Thank you. So much”

How dare he hold your hands in his. Dieter had bigger hands.

“You made those hours in the chair feel transcendent”

“I was just doing my job”

“I feel we had a good rapport going, just wondering if you’d…”

Dieter immediately feigned a coughing fit, interrupting whatever that prick was propositioning.

“Dieter! What are you doing here!”

“I came to take you out to dinner. To celebrate”

Your arms went around his waist and gave him a quick kiss.

“Aw, you’re so sweet!”

“Yeah, I’m an amazing boyfriend to my wonderful, hugely talented girlfriend”

He may have said that a bit too firmly. And his arm was very firmly around your waist.

You quipped in before the biting match began.

“Do you two know each other?”

“Just through our agent”

The testosterone was so thick you could spread it like butter on toast.

“I guess I’ll see you at the premiere then!”

That prick known as Jagar Aldritch then grabbed a cookie out of your Tupperware, took a small bite and waived it as he walked away.

Dieter glared after him, just to make sure that prick didn’t think of coming back. You decided to start putting your stuff away.

“Dieter, do you want to help me?”

That stopped his angry glaring. He might as well be the amazing boyfriend he claimed he was. He actually proved very helpful, although he did everything with a grumpy pout on your face. Once everything was put away, you decided to address the grumpy elephant in the room.

“Dieter, are you jealous of Mr. Aldritch?”

“What? No” he scoffed.

You looked at him the way a schoolteacher looked at a naughty schoolboy.

“Dieter Bravo, you may be an award-winning actor, but you are a terrible liar”

He hangs his head; he felt scolded.

“Okay maybe. You were being nice to him”

“I’m nice to everyone”

“He’s a pretentious prick!”

“Yes, I know”

He perked his head up.

“You do?”

“Of course, it’s obvious. He asked if I was Australian but then proceeded to go on about all the beaches he visited, and I’ve been to none of them, and he pronounced a bunch of them wrong. And I clearly put in more research into his character than he did. Did you know he hasn’t even read the book? Didn’t want it to interfere with his character or something”

Your angry ministrations were stirring something in him.

“You know, you’re sexy when you rant”

“I could go on for hours!”

“Please do”

“No, not now, I’m hungry. Can we go eat?”

He would have to remember to bring the subject up later tonight. He moved to help you grab your stuff. Picking up your Tupperware he had that glare again.

“Can’t believe that prick ate one of your cookies”

“Don’t worry, he only takes a bite to show off, then throws the rest out in the trash”

“He WHAT?!”

“It’s not that big of a deal”

Oh, it was a big deal. No one throws out a delicious cookie made by an equally delicious woman. That cookie was a work of heavenly bliss, and he was going out for the hunt!

Dieter stormed off.

“Dieter, no! No, don’t you dare. Don’t even think about it. Don’t you dare eat that trash cookie!”

[bored-frog]

Born and Raised

When I blew up at you, I was unable to properly express myself and how I felt, I let my anger take over, causing another drift between us because I can not be mature and maintain all the feelings coursing through me, ready to leap out of the prison that is my skin.

You don't know how guilty I feel for yelling, for arguing with you over something like this, a topic so delicate and important, I deeply apologize.

I am emotionally stubborn, everything I feel is felt strongly, nothing is half-assed inside my heart, which is why I'm so upset.

I understand that we walk in different shoes through life, you didn't ask for your pair and I didn't ask for mine, you don't know the pebbles and splinters tightly strapped beneath the material of mine, I don't know the full extent of what goes on beneath the surface of your socks and laces, but sometimes I feel that you judge me, that you compare yours to mine and get hostile with me because I must be walking on a fucking cloud; Appearances deceive.

When the world is throwing shit, you don't have to throw it at me too, I am not your enemy, I do not view you as less than, so why does it feel like you look down in disgust at me for the things I have no control over?

I feel positively shitty, I must be the dirtiest asshole bundled up in name brand toilet paper, right?

"You don't understand, but you can empathize."

=

"You'll never fucking understand, but I'm sure you can imagine the dirty caked up shit path I'm forced to walk through, while you glide through in a carriage you don't even have to work harder than everyone else to earn, don't insult me and say you do, how the fuck could you possibly get it?"

I hate it when you do that, when you say that, I am not riding on some high and mighty horse, my situation is just different, it's so god damn infuriatingly-annoyingly-frustratingly unfair when you do that, when you compare the two, it's as if I'm getting the biggest scowl from you every single time you bring it up; A "snobby brat" whining about her basket of lemons to an "untouchable."

I get nasty, snippy, and rude because of this sneering chokehold in the air between us when talks of the future is brought up, I dread the conversation every time, I don't want to discuss any of it, about me and "oh the places I can go," I try to give you hope and you roll your eyes at me, scoffing.

I'm a pretentious dick wasting the privilege I walk around with, this prized gift, this golden ticket that I want nothing more than to toss out because it feels awful to have; A worthless piece of shit wins the lottery but spends her life watching TV, a fucking insult.

I don't like the way you mentally side eye me, as the clock of aging ticks, you get more and more passively bitter with me, I uncomfortably twiddle my thumbs, wanting nothing more than to deal you a new hand of cards, for Life is a terrible dealer.

I understand and empathize that the fissured road you walk on isn't easy, nothing about the journey is brisk and fun, that it feels so demeaning, and that you have put in all your efforts alone as ungrateful assholes with birth rights and money drive around and honk at you, that they view you as this dirty dog beneath them, but don't look over and assume that mine must be a fucking breeze.

My cracked piece of opaque rubble carries it's own challenges, ones that I do not share, I sweat and moan in silence on this bumpy ass path, I trip and stumble, mentally scuffed and bruised as I force myself to keep going further down, I want to just stop dead in this traffic, shriveling up into a pathetic ball of tears, because I too am dealing with my own shit and it's not fucking easy, but you make me feel like it's nothing, that I couldn't possibly have problems.

I know you don't believe it, but I fully believe things are going to work out for you, right now it just feels like some asshole has set your lawn of potential on fire, I promise you it will get better, you are strong and beautiful, I know it feels like the world is against you, that no one is on your team, I am there, I'm the weirdo cheering and rooting for you from across the street, who will help you put out the fire.

With mastering the toughest task of patience, I assure you things are going to work out, that you are cable of so much more than what people assume based off of looks because they are jackasses living in the past, so please, have faith, don't lose hope in your future, and I beg of thee, stop telling me I don't understand, because I do, because I understand you.

- Autumn(Me)

[doggiewoggiez]

what is the reading list you’ve been doing

This meme. Got reposted from 4chan to Reddit to Twitter and finally to Tumblr. I'll update this post as I read each book. Here's the complete list:

1. Goosebumps #28: The Cuckoo Clock of Doom - R.L. Stine. Very middle of the road Goosebumps book not especially good but not terrible. 6/10 dead sisters.

2. Call of the Crocodile - F. Gardner. This book is a meme on /lit/ cause the dude's batshit and is constantly trying to promote his books that are extremely poorly written. He calls himself a famous author, doesn't believe gorillas or giraffes are real, and advocates chainsmoking cigarettes to help with the writing process. This book is the funniest thing I've ever read and made me so fucking angry by being so awful. 10/10 misplaced commas.

3. No Longer Human - Osamu Dazai. A semi-autobiographical story published before the author's suicide about a severely mentally ill character named Oba Yozo through his life of addiction, women, suicide attempts, and so on. An incredibly depressing read. His whole inner life is laid bare and it's disgusting and grotesque and you see yourself in him and you wish you could hold him and cry for him but even if you could you would never have the power to make anything okay. Beautiful fucking book, genuinely 100% no fucking joke changed my life. 10000/10 shitty cyberpunk adaptations.

4. Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoevsky. I cried hard as fuck dude. Another life changer for reals. Dostoevsky had such a deep understanding of human nature whether it be the lowest, most base and vile instincts or the unending capacity for love and compassion that exist in us all. All while being the blueprint for like every heady crime drama like Death Note, Breaking Bad, etc. The shit all you fags like. Most people just remember it as maybe required HS reading and definitely something people are pretentious about but it 100% deserves all the love it gets. Fan fucking tastic. 100000/10 years in Siberia.

5. Becoming - Michelle Obama. A bit too heavily ghostwritten, but when Michelle's voice shows through it's not terrible, it's kind of interesting to hear the inside scoop on White House life. It's kind of sad that Barack is the most interesting part of the book, and book-Barack seems like an extremely interesting and cool guy. But the book doesn't address all his dead civilians. 5/10 drone strikes.

6. Ulysses - James Joyce. The modernist novel, from what I understand. Half retelling of the Odyssey in 1900s Ireland, half a troll on literary critics, all around a pretty damn fun read. Not very far yet. Definitely the most difficult thing I've ever tried to read. Unfinished/10 Agenbites of inwit

7. 48 Laws of Power. This is like, THE sigma bro self help book as far as I've heard. It's pretty iconic, but I'm not especially excited for it.

8. Frankenstein - Mary Shelley. We all know it and love it, I'm interested to read the OG story.

9. Catechism of the Catholic Church 2nd Edition. Book from the Vatican that lays out what the church's official opinions, rules, shit like that are. Will be boring but interesting.

10. The God Delusion - Richard Dawkins. One of the biggest atheist dude books there is and probably by far the most influential. God is bad people who believe in God are stupid etc etc. Hopefully it has something interesting to say and isn't just a jerk off. It might just be a jerk off.

11. The Love Hypothesis - Ali Hazelwood. Some booktok romance schlock afaik. People make fun of it.

12. A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole. All I know is it's about a guy in New Orleans in the 60s. Might be good, people seem to really like it.

13. The Art of War - Sun Tzu. Im gonna get so good at surprising my enemy.

14. Kodomo no Jikan - Kaworu Watashiya. Pure pedoslop, I don't think there's even an official English translation so we might not read it but I'm preemptively giving it 0/10.

15. The Iliad - Homer. The story of the Trojan war. All I know is Helen, Horse, and that's about it.

16. The Odyssey - Homer. It's the Odyssey. I think it's funny that it comes after Ulysses since I don't actually know the whole story of the Odyssey itself.

17. Ted Bundy: Conversations with a Killer - Stephen G. Michaud and Hugh Aynesworth. This is that thing they made a Netflix doc about a while back.

18. The C++ Programming Language 4th edition - Bjarne Stroustrup. Exactly what it says on the tin, by the guy who wrote the language.

19. Empress Theresa - Norman Boutin. A classic, it's a weird self-published story by a guy who's extremely unwell, usually referenced in the same way Sonichu is.

20. The Sound and the Fury - William Faulkner. His most difficult to read work, about a Southern family at the beginning of the 20th century.

21. Black Future #1 - Whitney Ryan. A very racist BNWO sissification porn story that was probably written as a joke. Possible skip definite 0/10.

22. The Cat in the Hat - Dr. Seuss. You know this.

23. The Trial - Franz Kafka. One of Kafka's most famous unfinished works, about a guy who's on trial for something and he doesn't know what.

24. American Psycho - Bret Easton Ellis. Supposed to be way darker and more fucked up than the movie, really supposed to chill you to the bone afaik. VERY excited for this read.

25. Gravity's Rainbow - Thomas Pynchon. One of those famous "Really Fucking Long And Hard Books" like Infinite Jest or Ulysses, incredibly autistic foray into WW2 rocket science. Classic Pynchonery.

26. Magick In Theory and Practice - Aleister Crowley. Thankfully it's not the entirety of Magick Liber ABA Book 4.

27. Minecraft Jokes for Kids - Steve Minecraft. Not a real book but we'll substitute Jokes For Minecrafters by the Hollow family.

28. The Jews and Their Lies - Martin Luther. One of the most notorious antisemitic texts, right up there with the Protocols. It's going to be a pretty apalling read but it has pretty damn significant historical value so it's probably worth reading.

29. Dianetics - L. Ron Hubbard. The scientology book. It's way longer than you'd expect.

30. Everyone Poops - Taro Gomi. I don't understand this because girls don't poop.

31. In His Own Write - John Lennon. His writing and art, mostly just a bunch of absurd bullshit. I want to remain neutral and not just hate the book because I hate the guy. We'll see if it deserves that.

32. Bear - Marian Engel. This is that Canadian novel where the woman has a romance with a bear.

33. How To Get A Girlfriend - Chad Scott Nellis. Some bullshit self published thing. I'm gonna be swimming in punani.

34. The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck - Mark Manson. Some self help schlock afaik.

35. Gabriel Dropout (vol. 3) - UKAMI. This is that cutesy manga about those angels and demons in human high school.

36. 120 Days of Sodom - Marquis De Sade. Old story of elite sex cults, I'm pretty sure it's the origin of that being like a thing that people conspiracy theory about.

37. Phenomenology of Spirit - Hegel. You probably know Hegel from either Marx or Fallout New Vegas. I know Hegel because a chick at my friend's co-op talked at me about him for like ten minutes while I was way too shit faced to know what the fuck is going on around me at all but I nodded along.

38. Star Wars: The Ultimate Sticker Collection. I bought this used for a buck fifty with half the stickers gone. All the new trilogy ones were still there.

39. The Anarchist Cookbook. Vom hard at the idea of "buying" this but I want to make sure I get the version as it appears in the meme so I guess I'll drop a few bucks on it.

40. An American Life - Ronald Reagan. Practical applications for previous book.

41. Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger. Had to read this in high school, hated it, maybe it'll be better this time around.

42. Finnegan's Wake - James Joyce. An early postmodernist work about uhhh fucking whatever it was about. I'm not gonna lie if Ulysses is this hard for me this one will kill me.

43. The Charles Mingus CAT-alog for Toilet Training Your Cat. I'm not in the know when it comes to music but apparently this guy is like one of the gods of jazz. And he wrote a book on teaching your cat to shit in a people-toilet.

44. Am I Disabled? - The Simpsons S7E7. This is the book Homer reads where he learns obesity is a disability and gets really fat so he can work from home. Story of my life.

45. Serial Experiments Lain: An Omnipresence in Wired - Yoshitoshi ABe. The Lain artbook, with the short manga The Nightmare of Fabrication. Will be very expensive to get ahold of.

46. Pounded by the Pound - Chuck Tingle. We've heard enough about this guy the bit was holding onto the last molecule of funny it had like five years ago but I now had to buy a compilation paperback of his work for this.

47. Ford Capri II 2.8 & 3.0 Owners Workshop Manual 1974-1987. Had to order this from the UK couldn't find any in the US.

48. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov. We all know what this is. Of all things when my mom saw this list this was the book she pointed out as being really good, which I thought was funny.

49. Man's Life Magazine, September 1956 issue. "Weasels Ripped My Flesh." Good god it will be difficult finding the actual magazine, but the weasels story itself has been reprinted.

50. Structure and Interpretation of Computer Programs (2nd Edition) - Harold Abelson et al. I like when people make anime girls have it :)

51. Shiver - Junji Ito. Never been a major Ito fan but a couple of his works I really liked are in this compilation.

52. Neon Genesis Evangelion (vol. 2) - Yoshiyuki Sadamoto. The Eva manga was really good I've actually read it before.

53. How To Avoid Huge Ships - Captain John W. Trimmer. Classic meme because I guess the cover and premise is very funny but I don't really get the joke. It's not that ridiculous sounding of a book, it's just niche.

54. Spice and Wolf (vol. 1) - Isuna Hasekura. Light novel for that manga we've been seeing around. They put a generic cover on it and replaced the anime girl so it could sell to non-weebs.

55. Atlas Shrugged - Ayn Rand. My sister read this in like middle school and unironically no joke started bawling crying sobbing because poor people are so evil and awful.

56. The Very Hungry Caterpillar - Eric Carle. Oh Boy I Sure Hope This Little Wiggly Guy Eats Something Normal! Oh no.. oh dear ...

57. Glow In The Dark - Kanye West. Very very hard to get a physical copy but we'll try. Photo book of his tour of the same name.

58. Mein Kampf - Adolf Hitler. Now obviously this wasn't included on the list for the genuine important historical value this book has but that's what I'm going to be reading it for. In reading it critically afaik it really paints a picture of how pathetic and unwell he was.

59. Higurashi: When They Cry. I hear it's really good.

60. This is a naked photo of Daniel Radcliffe posed with a horse.

61. Aberration in the Heartland of the Real - Wendy S. Painting. This is a book on the life of the OKBOMB guy, Timothy McVeigh. I hate how true crime shit has become so polarized as either sensational dogshit to make women walk with their keys between their knuckles or some awful horrible thing that's not worth looking into because "they were just racist/misogynistic/etc" I think it's all very reductive so this promises to be a good read.

62. KUBARK Counterintelligence Interrogation. CIA document on breaking a prisoner and interrogating from the 60s.

63. The Game - Neil Strauss. The Bible for pickup artists.

64. Identifying Wood - R. Bruce Hoadley. Yep, it's wood.

65. Fresh And Fabulous Meals in Minutes - Ainsley Harriot. Lots of memes about him but this is just a regular cookbook.

66. The Turner Diaries - Andrew Macdonald. Far-right racist book that inspired terrorism and hate crimes. People who read it and didn't already agree with it going in have said it's poorly written and just blows, and in the peek I took that seems to be true. It's too influential to not read if I'm going to be reading about Timothy McVeigh. Hard to get since it got pulled from most online stores following Jan 6th.

67. The C Programming Language (2nd Edition) - Brian W. Kernighan & Dennis M. Ritchie. Gonna learn to code I guess.

68. A Little Life - Hanya Yanagihara. It's a story about a group of mentally ill gay men living in New York. Has been described as trauma porn written by a woman fetishizing gay men and is on there because channers like making fun of it, but it was also shortlisted for a Pulitzer.

69. The Rose of Paracelsus - William Leonard Pickard. The author was the victim of one of the largest acid busts and he wrote this in prison.

70. The Book of Mormon - Joseph Smith. Interested to learn what the fuck Mormons are actually all about.

71. Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone - J.K. Rowling. Like most people I read these in middle school. They were mid then and they're ass now but I'm not gonna tryhard about how bad they are because you've probably heard enough at this point.

72. A Critique of Pure Reason - Immanuel Kant. As someone who doesn't know shit about philosophy I'm excited.

73. Autobiography - Morrissey. Notorious for being published through Penguin Classics which is NOT for Morrisseys. Bad Morrissey. Go to your room.

74. Official Final Fantasy 7 Strategy Guide. I'm gonna get so good at FF7 dude.

75. My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness - Kabi Nagata. Think of the most annoying bpd she/they you know and then imagine a really mid book that she'd become way too annoying about. You've imagined this book.

76. Children of the Matrix - David Icke. The origin of the reptoids conspiracy theory.

77. Anti-Oedipus - Deleuze and Guattari. Mario and Luigi for your leftist roommate who won't do the dishes

78. Infinite Jest - David Foster Wallace. It's a book about a person place or thing I know that much.

79. Sonichu #0 - Gonna be near impossible to source a physical copy from its short Lulu run.

80. Uncle Tom's Cabin - Harriet Beecher Stowe. Obviously of great historical importance but I get a sneaking suspicion that's not why they put it on the list.

81. Bronze Age Mindset - Bronze Age Pervert. This is... Well, it's sure something.

82. Drilled By My Two Cowboys - Aurora Sommers. BBW Cowboy porn 😋💦

83. The Brothers Karamazov - Fyodor Dostoevsky. People say it's his best work and if it's anywhere near as good as C&P was it'll blow me away. Also the Godfather was inspired by it.

84. Spare - Prince Harry. Really unfunny inclusion I can't imagine there's much value in it.

85. Da Jesus Book. That's the Hawaiian Pidgin translation of the New Testament. So basically I'm just reading the bible with extra steps.

86. Elon Musk - Ashlee Vance. Biography on Elon Musk apparently, not especially interested cause good chance it'll just suck him off hard.

87. Where's Waldo (Deluxe) - Martin Handford. Oh god I hope I find him.

88. Dracula - Bram Stoker. Shoulda subbed to Dracula Daily......

89. Bart Simpson's Guide to Life. I'm excited to see what Bart has to say about what I need to do with myself.

90. Bakemonogatari (vol. 1) - Nisio Isin. I've heard of this in passing I don't really know anything about this light novel except there's like girls and they're monsters maybe?

91. Business Secrets of the Pharoahs - Mark Crorigan. Fake book from S8E2 of the show Peep Show, which I've never heard of. It's British.

92. Industrial Society and Its Future - Ted Kaczynski. All I really know about Ted's ideas in the end is that everyone on here says he's based. I definitely want to read him and formulate my own opinion but I will probably also end up agreeing that he's based.

93. My Twisted World - Elliot Rodger. This is the manifesto of that incel shooter, probably a pretty worthwhile read in the same way a lot of this stuff is, a look into a deeply troubled person's mind.

94. Wash Your Penis - Jordan B. Peterson. This doesn't exist so we'll just read 12 Rules for Life.

95. Andrew Tate's Exegesis of the Quran. Unfortunately he did not actually write one though I bet it would be soooo terrible and funny. But we will read the Quran.

96. Art of the Deal - Donald Trump. Time to find out why people respected this guy.

[captain-astors]

if you’re still doing 003 reqs i’d LOVE to hear what you think of tatara! he’s one of my favorite characters so i’m biased </3

I am indeed still doing these, and still thriving. Here we go!

How I feel about this character: 

So cool looking, the white trench coat and mask combo is so stupid and pretentious but it works somehow, and the fact that it has emotional value actually leans to the silly side of it in my mind. I’m not sure why, I think I’ve just wired my own brain incorrectly enough to go “haha you have emotions.” But I’m going to tell that portion of my mind to be quiet for now, because he has an excellent design, though it could stand to have a few more defining traits, and he looks a bit like a pokemon gym leader.

Oh! Also, Hands down coolest Kakuja and I wish I’d seen it before the Kakuja polls, in which I so foolishly voted Uta or something, thinking there could be no better. How wrong I was, FLAMETHROWER KAKUJA. The mere combination of words invokes awe. I could roll it around in my mind for hours. Continuing the pokemon comments, it really feels like the evolution of his normal outfit because it is also pretentious and stupid but somehow works and it’s really cool anyways. I didn’t realize how… large it was supposed to be before I saw a screenshot of the anime’s portrayal. It always felt human-sized to me, perhaps a couple feet taller but no, it apparently has the dimensions of an 8-wheeler and I don’t know how to feel about that. He definitely doesn’t really have a grand plan he’s just chilling with these comparatively much worse people while doing nothing particularly remarkable himself, he’s mostly just a functional figurehead eating grapes and providing the method to the madness that is Aogori. Eto had plans but she’s not going to take the time to carefully direct them herself. It’s a thankless job but might as well have the pale beanstalk who was-a-mask-wearing–kakuja-before-it-was-cool do it. He doesn’t seem to mind, or at least he’s just going to be in the same bad mood regardless.

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: 

Just secondhand HouTata. I observe it. Live in antagonism, die alone, perfect. The golden standard. Neither of them are happy. Be like them, fictional couples. Also I like the thought of Tatara being awful at cuddling but the natural warmth makes it nice anyways. 

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: 

Ayato. “I don’t care about him at all, not worth more than the dust beneath my feet without about the same usefulness- oh they grow up so fast.” Go put what can only be described as your awkward nephew to bed, I don’t know why you thought it was a good idea to let this child into your terrorist organization Tartara, but congratulations he’s yours now.

My unpopular opinion about this character: 

I have few opinions on him and none of them are very strong so it’s difficult to find an unpopular one… his personality gives the profound impression of an undersalted pretzel stick standing upright inexplicably, and a shade of light green-grey. When lost I just spew a small piece of my constant stream of nonsensical, slightly unhinged simultaneous thought processes. 

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: 

More screentime. Yeah he existed to prove points about other characters but you’d think the debatable leader of Aogori would be a bit more fleshed out.

Favorite friendship for this character: 

Eto! Mutual respect, terrible decisions, fun times.

My crossover ship: 

Maybe Rem. Or Luida. These are just my end-of-ramble thoughts now. The song I listened to for most of this has several instances of very goatlike screams and they were never where I thought they were no matter how many times I looped it. 

[evita-shelby]

Hey Juli!!!

Once more congratulations on 1,000 followers!!! 🎉

Let’s celebrate shall we?

Now… I’ve a very very serious question/advice to ask for the What would Eva do section:

I’ve the worst luck of the world when it comes to matters of the heart, like seriously-I’m going to share a little secret with Eva ages ago one of my former friends got married and I caught the bouquet 💐, she divorced a year later because she caught him cheating with a man (I know this sounds like a story I’d write).

Anyways… so there are girls with the endless queue of men ready to jump in as soon as they’re single again, me? 0 it seems like I’ve a men’s repellent 😂 I’m terribly shy, but funny once you get to know me, I’m not picky or pretentious, but I’ve to admit I walk around with a resting bitch face (completely unintentional), and I’ve been told that I look like I’m unapproachable, that men are scared to ask me out afraid I’d look at them like this:

I’m in my middle 30’s love music, movies, dogs, cooking, wine, going out for weekends getaway, travel, love to read, coffee shops, small towns and I dream of finding my soul mate, but there are days when I think it’s impossible… WWED?

Omg thank you Mar 😊

Anyways here it is

WWED

Gif by @tiffanyachings

I am very happy to hear you caught the bouquet, it is a very fun game. Once I saw one of my cousins body slam the girl next to her.

I did not participate because then I would win all the time or ruin my face, and the second would be a nightmare.

While dreadfully funny, it is still very awful to be cheated on.

I know the feeling; my exes had the nasty habit of seeking comfort with others.

Diosdado did sleep with any girl that smiled his way, Antonia did leave me for my cousin, Francisco.

As for your issue, remember, quality over quantity.

I have had my fair share of suitors, and most of them were, to put it nicely, pendejos.

The nice ones tragically died or were exiled and married someone else.

I have been told I intimidate men, I have been a spy, an assassin, a nurse, a businesswoman and most importantly, a witch.

If a man is scared to approach you, it is his loss.

If he cannot handle a resting bitch face then he is not a man, he is a boy.

A boy has no idea what he wants, a man will not give a shit whether you could kill him or simply look like you will if he desires you.

Really my husbands dug the danger and were not afraid to pursue me.

You will find one at the right time and when you least expect it so do not worry, and if you do not, then you are too much woman for them and not a single one of them were going to be the One.

You sound like an amazing woman, and remember love is not something you plan for, it comes when it wants to come.

All my best wishes,

Eva.

[mercurypyrite]

ok so i finished book 6 last night so this is a bit belated but whatever. longass masterpost of my thoughts on everything post 6-81 incoming

i felt awful for vil (3hrs of crying, he’s gotta be dehydrated) but it was lowkey kinda funny how malleus just popped up and was like “i’m in your debt (according to lilia) (pretty sure this was just for their own amusement?? idk man they’re fae) so i’ll help 👍” and just kinda poofed him back to normal.

i think this is the… third time we’ve seen him do smth like that? first at VDC, then during endless halloween night, and finally now. (though EHN came first canonically.) he seems to be making a habit of it. and that joyful squeal? love that. (vil’s normally so poised, though — goes to show how deeply book 6, and being rudely confronted by his fear of aging, rattled him)

=

leona: i’ve been fighting all night and i’m dead on my feet

ruggie & jack: sorry what. PLEASE elaborate

=

once i saw adeuce the only thought left in my head was “MY BOYS THEYRE HERE” i’m so glad they’re okay like damn. it feels like everyone’s been gone longer than 2 days lmao

=

“Human lives are as ethereal as silk thread on a spinning wheel — and just as easily cut short. But their fragility can be a boon. Interweaving and layering those threads creates the strong, resilient tapestry of their history. Such is the creature called man — neighbor to we creatures of the night.”

so so tempted to make part of this my blog quote but it sounds so pretentious. not like the current one isn’t i guess. also sleeping beauty ref goes brrr

=

ortho (lovingly) dragging idia is one of my new favorite things i think

“You don’t have any close friends who can keep you in line yet, and I don’t know if you ever will. Not to put too fine a point on it, but leaving you to your own devices is a terrible idea. So… I want to stay with you. Is that asking too much?”

“You’ve been my real brother for a long time now, Ortho.”

“Let’s go back to Night Raven College. You’ve got people waiting for you there.”

“…Yeah, I do, huh.”

LIKE GOD. THEM. i want to stay with you. you don’t have to act like my little brother but you’ve been my real brother for a while now. you don’t have close friends but you DO have people waiting for you. they won’t forget. (and then he ends up gaming with vdc gang and bantering with ortho around them, slowly coming out of his shell if only temporarily, and i’m so soft over that)

=

refurbished ramshackle was nice to see but… not really surprising, lol. looks directly at the guest room feature. twsten rlly likes doing things out of order huh.

=

also yuu spent “a few weeks” at pomefiore?? honorary heartslabyul student yuu is out, honorary pomefiore student yuu is in. they even got a uniform!!

jk they can coexist

(i will make them coexist. i love them both sm)

(i wanna see riddle and vil fighting over yuu /hj)

=

“I was called before parliament in the Land of Dawning. Bigwigs from STYX, the Department of Education, AND the Department of Magic all bombarded me with questions and glared daggers at me… ‘Why are so many consecutive overblots happening on your watch?! How do you explain this?!’

“That’s what I want to know! What have I done, except run this school as diligently as I could?! Night Raven College has resident counselors and medical mages appointed by the Department of Education as it is!

“Since the assembly saw no major issues with the school’s leadership, the inquiry came to a close… But I certainly didn’t expect one of our students to bring about an off-campus catastrophe even as we convened!”

crowley actually getting in legal trouble (or at least being threatened with legal trouble) actually surprised me a lot??? i’m so used to thinking stuff like this would more or less get covered up for plot convenience or wtv that it’s nice to see crowley get smacked with it. rip headmage

ALSO rip therapist yuu memes bc NRC HAS THERAPISTS (tho theyre not rlly dead bc. no one SEES the therapists. probably. stubborn kids.)

=

seeing ortho again = no thoughts left in my head redux, “BABY BOY” edition!! he looks so nice!! i love the lil buttons!! rlly i love all the details, looking like an NRC uniform while still being undeniably ortho

“‘I don’t get it’ is a perfect encapsulation of my current state!”

LOL. he’s not wrong though.

=

…of course crowley took a bribe. i dunno why i’m surprised to hear that.

though in vil’s words, “It’s hardly our place to interject if it’s a win-win for both parties, I suppose.”

crowley’s inquiry about grim’s health makes me side-eye him more strongly the more i think about it. yes i know why (grim attacked yuu, was more strongly affected by the blot, etc) but i’m still suspicious, i wanna know if there’s more to it.

“I’m truly glad that you — ah, that is, ALL of you — made it back to the school safe and sound.”

the way he added “all of you” made it seem to me like they were an afterthought compared to grim…

=

twst rlly put aaaall the fluff at the end huh. not like i’m complaining though!! it’s like a reward for getting through all the angst. idia’s gift is very him (lol) and idia and ortho playing video games with everyone is adorable

“We should probably make Idia play holding the controller backwards or something, though. He’s super good.”

“I see what you’re doing, Ortho. Trying to skate by without any handicaps for yourself, huh? YOU’RE the one who needs extra restrictions, like no items allowed.”

=

play for a crowd! is also up there on my list of favorite twistunes but i can’t play it while sleep deprived or my score goes down the toilet. ask me how i know. half the time normal mode is harder than hard mode.

also i haven’t said it anywhere yet but idia’s battle theme is a banger too. ignihyde osts killed it

=

and rook and vil’s discussion of ortho’s soul!! screams!!

“He — or rather, they — chose to try and boost their brother up from the depths below to the skies above. What do you call such love and affection, if not a soul?”

=

the “dream” sequence was so interesting!! yuu and mickey can’t see anything but each other. grim can’t see mickey either, and vice versa.

but. mickey could see silver. why was silver at ramshackle at night? a reasonable assumption is that silver went to ramshackle to find malleus, couldn’t, and left, but really…

why could mickey see silver at all?

i’ve heard (though i haven’t got a source for this unfortunately) that silver says — somewhere — that he’s seen yuu before, or that they look familiar, or something along those lines. i wanna know if this is connected to that. also, silver’s curse. that too. sleep/dreams vs reality etc.

=

and last but not least, lilia is dropping death flags left and right and malleus is Concerned. to be fair, so am i. what’s going on, dude?

(sidenote: damn it riddle’s hair went back to normal. i was hoping he’d just have white hair now 😭)

(also, eagerly awaiting the “gloomurai is idia and muscle red is lilia” reveal in book 7. yana pls.)

(i… may have gotten spoiled a bit. unintentionally. so now i know that in book 7, [REDACTED].)

[minty-playhouse]

ooh you've been listening to the who for a while! what got you into them? ahhh all the best cowboys is probably my favorite pete album too! but i love white city and honestly all of his (what you said about having a keith connection is how i sorta feel with pete, now THAT'S pretentious, no way around it) so have you read any biographies about keith & what were your opinions on them? thoughts on roger's keith biopic he's been talking about since 1980?

Hello yes I’ve been listening to them for a long while, due to my mom’s influence (she’s a huge fan too!). I think my very first exposure to Who content in a way I could like, understand (my mom would hear them when I was like 8 years old but I didn’t have the brains to appreciate it lol) was when I watched the Kids Are Alright movie.

I had just started getting really into the Monkees at the time and I was going really deep into the “60′s and 70′s” music rabbit hole, so watching that was a huge eye opener to me like “Wait, why am I not listening to them RIGHT NOW?”

As for biographies and books, I actually got Keith’s most extensive bio not too long ago, but just reading like the intro chapter already got me really weirdly emotional so I had to take a step back and prepare myself emotionally a little better before I dive into it (that and the other two Who books I recently acquired).

About the biopic, at the same time I’m looking forward to it because it would be super duper cool, I am secretly so scared because I worry about them focusing on the awful side of his and not like, him as a whole (although I trust Roger not to do that but movies are complicated things like maybe he wouldn’t have the final say ah...)

And again sorry for the absurd delay in answering this I’m being terrible at this secret santa thing /rolls on the floor

[glorious-craftwork]

In retrospect, using ibid as a citation in The Histories would probably be inappropriate, as Latin does not technically exist in that universe, right? Otoh it's both incredibly convenient and lends the whole text an air of credibility.

[ecliptsukki]

his delinquent phase ❧ kaoru sakurayashiki // cherry blossom

navigation | music

➣ genre: fluff

➣ warnings: adam’s existence 

➣ request: can i request a one shot where you’re cherrys s/o and like childhood best friends with joe and cherry and adam and you’re gushing over cherrys old bad boy look with piercings and everuthing and cherry one day goes to S with his piercings and hair the same way as before just to see you fawn over him skjfks

➣ a/n: this took me three times to type up because the first two times i did it, tumblr thought it would be funny to delete it. i’m not sure if i love how this came out, but it’s still better than my original plan. hopefully this was correct to what the anon requested. enjoy!

ps: i’m also going to be going on a trip for four days tomorrow, so i’m not sure if i’ll be able to post. i’ll definitely try to start working on my other requests!

You had known Joe, Cherry, and Adam ever since the four of you were in high school. Out of the three, you had met Joe, first, not soon before you met Cherry.

You were walking down the eventful streets of Okinawa, admiring the sights and getting accustomed with the area. You had moved to the city not too long ago and already were growing attached to the place. In your defense, the city was your perfect and desired location to live in. 

A gentle breeze blew through your hair, rustling the leaves of the green trees. You sighed at the feeling of the cool breeze tickling your warm skin. Not long after that breeze had gone, another, harsher breeze blew past you. You flinched at the abnormally sharp wind, snapping your head to the side, in its direction. You were met with honey red eyes and short, green locks, swaying. 

The male slips past you, stopping abruptly.

“Sorry about that,” he smiled, embarrassed, “I didn’t hurt you, did I?”

You were in awe, seeing what the boy was standing on, and on alert because you had always been taught to be cautious around strangers, especially when you were walking alone. 

“Um, no. I’m alright, just shocked,” you shrugged, replying quietly.

Another harsh, but gentler than before, wind blows past you, revealing a pink-haired male. He had three piercings on his ear and one on his lip. Half of the boy’s face was hidden by his long bangs, allowing your focus to lock on his golden eye.

“Watch where you’re going,” he snaps at his green-haired friend. “Sorry about him,” he apologizes, giving you a polite smile.

All the sirens were going off in your head.

He has so many piercings! Is he a delinquent? Are both of them delinquents? If they are, I can’t fight them off on my own. What do I do?

“I’m Kaoru,” the bubblegum-haired male suddenly said, “This is Kojiro.”

Kojiro nodded at you, an embarrassed blush still grazing his cheeks. 

“Hey, aren’t you the new kid?” Kaoru asked, finding your puzzlingly familiar.

“Oh, that’s why I felt like I’ve met you before,” Kojiro spoke up, nodding his head when he realized who you were.

Awkwardly, you shyly respond, “Sorry, I can’t seem to remember seeing you guys at school. Are you in my class?”

Until dusk, the three of you talked, getting to know the each of you better. You were also able to befriend the boys you were so afraid of, becoming your first two friends in the city.

You met Adam in the dark of night, beside Cherry and Joe.

They had brought you along, one night, wanting to skate with you. You already knew the basics of skating, nothing more, nothing less. Therefore, as your closest, and only, friends, they wanted to get further acquainted with you in something they loved. 

“Who’s the sweet cheeks?” His hoodie-covered eyes left an eerie pressure on you, causing goosebumps to emerge from your skin.

“This is our close friend, Y/N L/N,” Cherry spoke up.

“She goes to school with us, and we wanted to bring her skating. Mind her tagging along?” Joe asks his hooded friend.

“Not at all, just as long as she can keep up,” he spoke in a cocky tone.

The pretentious attitude the unnamed face had was irking you in the wrong way. He seemed too mysterious for your liking. A third of the boy’s face was hidden in the shadow of his hoodie, leaving you only able to see the blue tips of his hair and his structured nose. 

He must’ve noticed your timid stare because he looks at you, under his hood, “Call me Adam.”

 Cherry and Joe look at you expectingly.

“Just call me sweet cheeks, for now,” you reply, distantly, not ready to let your guard down just yet.

You hear your two friends sigh, chuckling to each other.

“Don’t worry, she’ll warm up to you, soon,” Cherry told Adam, “We know firsthand how she is with meeting new people.”

You blush, remembering your first encounter with the pair.

Thinking back, you still regret letting your walls down and accepting Adam as a friend. Not a day goes by that Adam doesn’t linger in your mind, as much as you’d hate to admit. 

You despise that man with a passion. From your first interaction, you should’ve known that there was something off about the blue-haired male, but pondering on these frustrations now wouldn’t change anything. As much as you’d like to curse the man for hurting your friends’ and your feelings, you knew you had to move on.

You sat on the soft mattress of your shared bed, scrolling through old pictures stored on your phone. You saw pictures taken by Kaoru when you guys went on dates. Majority of the photos were candid, seeing as he always had told you that you were the “most photogenic woman” he had ever met.

You remember the day he had told you that. You also remember your laughed reply.

“Then you’ve got the whole world to explore, my love.”

Although, honestly, you thought Kaoru was quite the photogenic one himself. His gorgeous, sorted, pink hair matched with his golden eyes and perfect face never looked bad, not even at the crack of dawn or in the late of night. 

Speaking of which, you scrolled upon a photograph of Kaoru sitting all pretty with his piercings on display. Those piercings brought back many memories, humorous and lustful.

Ironically, the thing that brought you fear before now brings you yearning.

Honestly, once you had befriended Kaoru and came to trust him, the piercings no longer frightened you but instead, fascinated you. Those metal hoops further increased your attraction to the ponytailed man, leading you to the relationship you were in now.

Obviously, Kojiro played a big role in setting the two of you up together because both of you were completely oblivious to the other’s feelings. It got to the point that Adam almost had to step in and wack some sense into the both of you.

Anyways, ever since Kaoru had started working in the calligraphy business, he removed his piercings to maintain a professional image. You detested the idea, but you also knew that it was the best for his business. 

Now that you were looking back at photos of Kaoru as a teenager, you began to crave seeing him in those metal rings once more. You missed the “bad boy” look your boyfriend used to have, not that you didn’t appreciate how he looked now. It’s just that there’s a different vibe to his current and past aesthetics.

As you stalked through more pictures of teenage Kaoru, you were unaware of the very man you were thinking about watching you. He noticed the longing and craving in your gaze. Then, he caught a glimpse of what was being projected on your screen: it was him but in his teenage years. 

Suddenly, everything clicked for Kaoru, and he had the perfect plan in mind.

Something was off. Usually your boyfriend would insist on bringing you to “S” himself but not today. If anything, he was urging you to go with Kojiro.

“He’s been your friend for the same amount of time as I. You should take this time to your advantage and catch up,” was Kaoru’s excuse.

First of all, catch up on what? It’s not like you haven’t talked to Kojiro in months. Actually, you talked to him a day ago, at “S.” Secondly, what’s up with the sudden lenience and weak excuses?

Joe, who was also in on the plan, tried to help his friend out, making a feeble attempt to lure you with free food.

“I can get free food from you whenever I want,” you replied, squinting suspiciously at your friend.

“Not with that attitude, you can’t.” That pulled a raised brow from you and a regret-filled face from the muscular man.

Though you weren’t fully convinced that nothing was off, you still left with Joe, caving into their terrible attempts of covering up whatever they were hiding from you.

You had arrived at “S” with Joe for about ten minutes now, but there was still no sightings of your beloved, Cherry. Joe caught glimpse of your searching eyes and reassured you that he would be coming, be it later than usual.

Reki, Langa, and Miya had made their way over to you, sparking up a conversation with you, making you forget about the missing presence of a specific male. 

Miya was explaining the new training regiment and diet he was to use in order to advance his strength, leading you to worry for the small teenager. If he didn’t eat enough, it could become fatal to him. You didn’t understand why a child was being treated so harshly by his managers, forcing him to eat barely anything and train long hours of the day. 

You were concernedly asking Miya if he was feeling alright and offered him an energy bar you carried around in case of emergencies, which he gratefully accepted, when you heard the cheers of fangirls behind you. Knowing they weren’t meant for Joe, you turned around to meet the golden eyes you’d fallen in love with.

This time, there was something different. His face wasn’t hidden by his mask. You could see the pale skin of his cheeks and the pink of his lips. Besides the absence of the black cloth, you noticed metallic rings decorating your boyfriend’s lip and ears. Also, his hair wasn’t whipping behind him, as per usual, but laid low, drifting in the wind.

For a hot moment, you had thought you had finally lost it, but when you blinked your eyes, looking at Miya then back to Cherry, you realized you were still sane and your boyfriend still looked like he aged back into his high school days.

“Is that Cherry?” Miya asked from beside you.

You nodded, speechless.

You heard someone let out a loud laugh beside you, “Since when did he have piercings?”

Ignoring the redhead’s outburst, you were mesmerized by the Cherry you had been obsessing over a couple days ago. It felt like one extravagant dream that you didn’t want to wake up from. In your defense, as he stepped of his skateboard, coming to embrace you, he looked straight out of a fantasy. His skin was practically glowing, and his hair gently floated perfectly onto his shoulders.

“Hello, darling,” he spoke in a sultry voice, placing a soft kiss to your forehead as he held you in his muscular arms.

“K-Kao—” you quickly realize your soon-to-be mistake and fix it, “Cherry.”

His eyes shrink as he laughs, endearingly, admiring the flustered and confused look you were portraying.

“Is this why you and Joe were being so weird earlier today?” You asked, cheek pressed against his slim, toned chest.

“Indeed, my love. What do you think? Definitely brings back some memories of the old days,” he lifts your chin, forcing you to look him in the eyes.

“I love it. It’s perfect. You’re perfect,” you smile brightly, eyes lustrous. Pushing yourself up on your toes, you whisper into his ear, “You also look really hot.” You quickly pull away, turning a vibrant red.

“I think you broke her,” Joe told his friend, placing a heavy hand on the pink-nette’s shoulder.

After the supposed one occurrence surprise, you began to avidly ask him to wear his piercings, loving how attractive and domineering he looked in them. If he denied, you would ask him to, at least, tie his hair in the relaxed half up half down hairdo. He didn’t mind the different hairstyle as much as he did the piercings so it became a normal look for him. The only times he would willingly put on his piercings were when he was going to “S” or when the two of you were safe in the comfort of your own home, for research purposes.

[zarnzarn]

Stolitz fic rec!!

||

I'm going to just drop my favorite stolitz fics here.

They run at night by @wearemisfortune

Blitzo is always moving because when his body stops, his mind races. This almost always leads to a terrible fucking idea.

Tonight is no different—but the result will be.

-lovely angst, lovely climax, and it captures Blitz's line of thinking in a serious tone but in a way still feels authentic to the character. And I'm ALWAYS a sucker for the sheer unconditional trust trope.

Junctures by @sluttycrimehat

To everything, there is a season.

-I still am in complete awe of how the author managed to fit so much in such little time. The bit at the end always fucking gets me, I love it so MUCH.

The last general by @curtailed

It's in a month after, with Stolas spent and lying on his side, that Blitzo finally musters up the courage to tell him.

-Hello??? BEAUTIFUL post-harvest moon fic, wonderful vibes, love how well they know each other in this one, the trust is amazing. Love it.

You got everything that I want by @bipridemoth

Stolas can’t recall a time where “love” wasn’t synonymous with “pain” for him.

With Blitzo, it’s not love. So, there’s no pain. Stolas doesn’t let there be pain, at least not emotionally, the physical pain is something he quite enjoys. When Blitzo leaves after their monthly night together, he doesn’t allow himself to feel pain, only anticipation of the next time. He likes that there’s always a next time, even though that’s because of his active incentive more than anything else. But that’s alright, he doesn’t want Blitzo to come see him without an incentive. He deserves favors in turn for what he’s giving Stolas.

-Stolas angst!!!! The angst really is delicious in this one, with just as nice of a happy ending. Blitz is confident about the relationship, which is Wonderful to read and the "I know where this is going" segment had me in TEARS.

Between fairy tales and realities by @coloringthegreyscale

Blitzo's a complicated imp and Striker and Stolas accept that. But what happens when the two worlds he's made for himself collide together for one night? Well...

-Okay, so yes, this is striker/blitz/stolas, but it's so good. All three of them have a lovely dynamic, managing to work out somehow, with powerful Stolas, wonderful Blitz and a HILARIOUS Striker. Go read the series, it's a lot of fun and has many cute interactions that made me smile.

The look by @seireileafy

Blitz has been noticing a change in Stolas.

-It's such a CUTE drabble, I adore when one person can tell the other is pining for them, and the LAST LINE FUCKING GETS ME EVERY TIME-

Instead I made my bed with apathy by @thebooklord15

Just like every night before this one, Blitzo glared at the form next to him, already lulled into the bliss of slumber. He had never meant for things to turn out this way-he’d gotten the grimoire already, he didn’t need this man and from the way Stolas treated him it was clear he did not need the imp either.

And yet.

-Jcjdkafj this one is so GOOD I love blitz being pissed off yet too deep in to stop, and like I've said for others already THAT LAST LINE, PLEASE-

Call and response by anon

It was a love story, maybe.

-short but deliciously angsty, with some beautiful imagery, really nice dialogue, and time-doesn't-exist-in-this-motel-room vibes. Love it.

Shovel proof by @kereea

Octavia tries to give Blitzo the shovel talk. He decides to help with that.

-FUCKING cute, love the Octavia/Blitz dynamic, and it has snappy fun dialogue!! Really sweet.

Reaching out, touching me, touching you by @allmightshipserasermic

Stolas hasn’t been able to preen sufficiently in quite awhile, since Stella refuses to do it for him anymore. Blitzo offers to help.

-PREENING FIC is there anything more I have to say?

The skin you could have by @coloringthegreyscale

Stolas catches Blitzo staring and it leads to some talk, some magic, and a little bit of fun.

-Again, BEAUTIFUL dynamic between the two, lots of angsty tenderness, and lovely body imagery.

Different shapes by @sirdust

“Before the exorcist, he taketh the image and shape of a man.”

Blitz catches a glimpse of Stolas’ human form.

-okay, practically a direct opposite of the previous fic, but SO GOOD, I can't describe it. Love the imagery and their comfortable relationship.

A helluva mess by @stratumgermanitivum

It’s not like Stolas isn’t a hot piece of ass, because he is.

And it’s not like Blitzo’s blind or anything, because he isn’t.

It’s just that there’s pleasure, and then there’s business, and never the twain shall meet. (Unless he finally gets Moxx on board with that threeway, in which case, Blitzo fully intends to christen every damn surface of the office except his precious Loony’s desk.)

-AMAZING, love the pining and denial on both sides it's so great especially since you can tell both sides know that they've messed up. Again, LAST LINE!!

Eat the whole cake (it's what you deserve) by @okoyik

"His Highness is on the phone for you, sir," Moxxie says.

Blitzo makes a face. "Who?"

"Stolas," Moxxie supplies, as if that's supposed to help Blitzo understand. His expression is surely one of complete confusion as he stares at the other imp.

"Who the fuck is Stolas?" Blitzo asks slowly, racking his brain for a face to put to the name.

-

Blitzo's memory starts to slip, and all he knows is he needs that owl that seems to haunt his nightmares to stay away.

-HELLO it's only on one out of four chapters for now but it's already SO GOOD I can't WAIT for the rest!!!

Stand tall, but your hands are shaking by @remymorton

It’s been a month since the Harvest Moon festival. Another full moon night arrived, and after that... Blitz ... He's not well.

-wordless cute comfort, truly very sweet, I love it.

Palaces and souvenirs by @cloudysonder

So Stolas is objectively. Objectively. Attractive. Kinda soft-looking, sometimes. Pretty. Whatever. Fuckin’ whatever. That’s always been a thing. Blitzo knew that, Stolas definitely knew that-- whatever.

"This is not," Blitzo thinks, sounding a little bit desperate even to himself, "some sort of revelation."

His flicks of the lighter get a little more unstable, a little more frustrated.

A clawed hand reaches over and takes hold of the lighter, lighting Blitzo’s cigarette with practiced ease, as if he’d done the same thing a thousand times before (He has, Blitzo realizes).

“Silly Blitzy,” he giggles quietly, giving Blitzo a soft pat on the head before curling up beside him, stretching one last time before closing his eyes to sleep.

Blitzo feels warm.

"This," Blitzo tells himself, and it sounds like a command, "will not be a problem."

-I saw the start of this fic on Twitter and have been following it religiously ever since. It's really a gorgeous fic, three chapters up, with the promise of a Great slow burn, fun dialogue and Octavia & Blitz bonding. The level of denial Blitz is in even as he moves comfortably around every aspect of Stolas' life cracks me tf up.

Can't by @hazbincalifornia

Blitzo realizes he feels something something that he doesn't want to feel. This was supposed to be simple.

-feelings realization fic, wonderful, amazing, lovely, also the exact same way I realized I was gay, funnily enough (girl fell asleep in my lap and I was like oh. Oh fuck.)

Too late to stop by @malkaviancake

Stolas spends some time with his thoughts, realizing that his feelings for Blitzo aren't as one sided as he presumed.

-GORGEOUS vocab, I'm truly very obsessed with it. Like most of these stories, LAST LINE!!!!

Itchy with want, thin on sleep by me

It happens in parts- both falling in love and having his eyes opened.

-I will,, finish this one day, but for now here's a few in between moments before they have The Conversation.

Heaven in hiding by me

Their nights together are good, they always are, both of their tastes lining up to be shockingly compatible, but on the days where they end early and they get to spend some extra time cleaning up in comfortable silence or playful banter- and Blitz would rather take a bullet than admit this out loud- but those nights are pretty great too.

-AFTERCARE FIC, I had to write an aftercare fic ft. Good dom Blitz, Stolas taking care of him in return and a comfortable relationship that they both know is going to cause Problems in the future :)

Love in the bones and sinews of this curse by me

Five times Stolas and Blitz needed the grimoire to break a curse + one time they didn't.

-self explanatory. I tried to make it as funny as possible, everyone bickers a lot and Blitz brings Stolas flowers and gifts, what more could you need?

Life is a curse (love makes it worse) by me

"Alright!" Blitz says, clapping his hands together, "Weapons out, and-"

Half pull out some gun or the other, but half just look at him blankly. Blitz wishes for death.

"Save me from this family," He mutters under his breath, "Okay. Take these then." He passes out the few weapons he'd brought along with him and doesn't ask if they know how to use them because if he hears a no, he's giving up and going back home. "Stick close and talk loudly so the others can hear us. Let's go."

They move out, Blitz taking the lead and the rest forming a circle close behind him, starting up a loud conversation about the neighbour's garden. It gives him enough time to wonder exactly what the fuck he's doing here, in a nightmare world with a bunch of pretentious snobs, searching for his stupid Ars Goetia boyfriend, instead of sleeping in his nice lumpy bed back at home.

-a sequel to the previous fic!!! I had to write some Octavia and Blitz bonding, and accidentally added in a bunch of teenage imps who work for Stolas who imprint on Blitz immediately. And there's Eldritch Stolas, protective boyfriends and found family!!! The whole shebang!!!

This ended up being Much longer than I'd expected, but genuinely every fic up there is really good, go check em out!!!!

[giorno-plays-piano]

Abominable Part 1

Pairing: mage!Peter Parker x mage!Reader

Warnings: yandere, obsession, stalking, murders, possible gore in the future chapters, pretty dark story overall.

Words: 1543

Summary: An investigator of the Mage's Association, you are sent to discover the mystery behind a series of murders before more sinister events take place.

P.S. This was inspired by The Garden of Sinners particularly. I loved it dearly when I was a teenager.

To avoid any confusion, the reader is neither good nor bad due to the nature of her profession. Peter is an adult.

____________

Stepping on a platform with a vintage Samsonite briefcase in your hand, you looked at the people standing aside, most of them waiting for other passengers to leave the train. Although you knew the face of a magus who was supposed to meet you, it was hard to recognize him in the crowd, and you stared at all those people in front of you, clenching the briefcase’s handle. You hated waiting.

Of course, Lord Pierce wasn’t too happy with your arrival: the old fool thought he was untouchable even after a series of murders and an unnatural magic activity in Tombra that got the Mage's Association alarmed. You remembered the revulsion in Mr. Stark’s voice when he talked of Alexander. The old aristocracy, Lord Pierce was an outstanding magus who had long abandoned practicing any decent magic and instead preferred to exploit the strength of his numerous successors. While he still had some friends in the Association, Stark hated him greatly and was happy to remind him who was in control.

Naturally, Pierce knew why you came to Tombra, and the conversation between you two didn’t go well. You didn’t hide your intentions: you were the Investigator of the Clock Tower, and your job was to figure out what was happening in that megalopolis where Lord Pierce resided proudly. It meant you were going to be a great disturbance and a possible danger to many aristocratic families under Alexander’s protection. 

It wasn’t surprising he chose the most useless assistant to help you find out the truth. His name was Peter Parker, and he was class D+ magus who attended neither Clock Tower nor Atlas Academy. His role was to slow you down, you thought and sighed. 

Suddenly, you saw a familiar face when a young man hurried to you, his cheeks red, sweat running down his face: apparently, he was late. You snickered, looking at his formal attire - his black tie was so long as if he stole it from his father.

Once he was close enough, the young man stood tall, at attention, waiting for you to say something as he stared at you with awe and horror.

“Lady Ragna of the Clock Tower,” you named your rank coldly, and your companion nervously bit his lower lip, acting exactly how you expected of him.

“Peter of Tombra! Pleased to make your acquaintance!” He sounded too excited, and his hands were trembling a little, although he tried hiding it.

Gods, what was he good for in a situation like this, unless he possessed some extraordinary powers not stated in his file? Well, now was the time to discover that, you thought as you narrowed your eyes at the young man.

"Your primary magecraft?"

"B-bounded fields and healing!"

Nothing spectacular there, but bounded fields could be of use to you if you would ever be attacked while performing magic.

"Elements?"

"Water and wind!"

This was better: magi controlling more than one element were still rare, and the boy could make a nice apprentice if he were to be send to the Clock Tower. Besides, with Tombra surrounded by a river, a liquid manipulation skill Peter definitely possessed could be valuable, too.

"Magic circuit composition?"

"N-normal?"

"Any familiars?"

"None."

He was clearly feeling like a mouse in front of a snake, his face getting even more red with every second, and you found the situation rather funny.

"Your motto?" You stared him dead in the eye.

For a second Peter looked horrified, his mouth slightly open as if he were to say something, but you heard no sound coming from him. Then, as if struck by lightning, he gibbered with fear, "Live p-proudly?"

Oh boy. He really thought you were being serious when you talked rubbish with a stony face. If anybody was to talk about a personal motto, even the most pretentious magi of the Clock Tower would burst out laughing.

Rolling your eyes skyward, a gleam of deviltry in them, you smirked, "It was a joke. Don't ever use a motto, it's a terrible idea."

"Thank goodness! I thought it's something high magi of Clock Tower have." The next second Peter made a sigh of relief, and then the both of you laughed loudly, making other people on the platform throw glances at you.

Although you realized the young man had much less experience than you, you still felt he would be fun to have around. If he could make your life a little easier, you would accept his help.

Moving away from the platform and soon passing through the station's hall, you went straight to the city streets instead of catching a taxi. Peter hurried after you, still perplexed at your refusal to let him carry your bag - you guessed he expected you to boss him around, and it made you chuckle. What Pierce was doing with young magi here if Peter had such an impression about higher-ups?

"Lady Ragna, I was informed that the cottage where you chose to stay is in the suburbs. Did you decide to change it?" He asked, seeing you walking to a completely different place.

"No, it's the same cottage. If you wonder why we aren't driving there right now, I'd prefer to patrol the streets tonight to get to know the city. We can discuss the details of the job in the meantime."

You walked away fast, not looking at your companion anymore and watching the night city instead: you had never been to Tombra before, but many magi from the Clock Tower were born there, and their talk about the city always made you a little jealous. Born in a small town to a simple human woman who knew nothing of magic, you always wished to know what it was like to grow up in a true magic society like the one in Tombra, a home to many noble families, albeit smaller and less significant than those living in the capital. 

The city looked exactly like you imagined it: giant grey buildings stood besides the streets, and while they didn't look particularly pretty, you loved those countless neon signages and bright posters that were shining even in the darkness of the night. The streets were busy with tourists admiring the city, couples walking out of the fancy restaurants and cinemas, and young people, recklessly snooping around some nightclubs and bars, trying to get in despite the security glaring at them and requiring them to show their ID cards while the kids pretended they forgot them. There was also a small marketplace with colorful food trucks and booths, offering both local and international cuisine, and you blended into the crowd immediately, taking some crepes and then buying takoyaki - Peter, following you like a puppy, looked shocked.

"I can't do my job on an empty stomach," you smirked and handed him some takoyaki.

Funny enough, he accepted the second you showed the plastic plate into his hands, eating so hungrily as if he had been starving the whole day.

"Well, now since I feel a bit better, let's talk business," you motioned the young man to follow you, and turned to a narrow alley, leaving the noisy market that was going to be full of people for at least a couple of hours more. "Do you have any idea why I have been sent by the Association?"

Licking his fingers, Peter looked somewhat shyly at you, probably afraid he would say something silly, "From what I understand, the reason is some unnatural magic activity the Association couldn't trace, and the involvement of its user in several murders."

"Correct." Crossing the alley, you scratched the chipped paint from an old building in front of you and looked at your fingers, furrowing your brows. "To be precise, the reason why the Association didn't leave these murders to a human police is the method how these murders were carried on. Whoever did it pretty much sucked the soul out of victims' bodies."

Peter frowned, staying still while you kept examining the concrete wall in front of you, drawing strange symbols that started glowing immediately as you finished them.

"It may sounds funny, but the ritual necessary to prevent the soul of a dead person to come back to Akasha is known only to a couple of magi, and each of them is considered a great danger to the society by the Association. This alone is a threat, but Mr. Stark's other concern is the indefinite nature of magic practiced in Tombra. It is likely that the magus responsible for the deaths is planning something much more sinister, and we can't allow this to happen."

Finding what you were looking for, you nodded to yourself and moved further, Peter walking right beside you with a concerned expression on his face. He was probably surprised you didn't need his guidance, but you spent the last three days memorizing Tombra's map.

"Do you mean that the souls of victims can be combined to become a power source for some... dark ritual or something?" He asked nervously, licking his lips.

You smirked, turning to him and pointing to the wall of the next building that started to glow subtly as you got close, "Exactly, Peter."

__________

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