#optimus likes sport

[ask-a-bot]

Worried for Megs? That makes two of us, Prime…..

Bowls sounds a lot like this winter sport that happens during the Olympics. It involves a weighted object, and the team has to get it as close to the center as possible. For the life of me, I can’t remember the name of it! Dorthy, do you remember what it’s called?

How are Silverbolt and Skyfire doing? I know they were helping with the room project.

Does it involve sweeping? I've played that – curling! They have a team in Scotland that I want in on.

Well, their size and strength definitely helps! They're helping to fit the window, right now. Next job: the balcony.

Thanks for your concern and support, by the way.

[that-glitter-chick]

Like father, like son.

[cybertron-smash-or-pass]

RiD 01 Megatron

[witchofthesouls]

Let's be honest. If humans ever find out that the Autobots and Decepticons were real aliens, most of them really don't care. Many folks either have friends, family, classmates or coworkers who are Toons thus nothing can really faze them. Oh? Megatron threatens to blow up the Earth? Cue a bunch of Toons sabotaging EVERYTHING.

War is boring so why not have some fun? Any Cybertronian artifacts on Earth would be deemed irretrievable since they are most likely within the vicinity of a Toon. Only way for anyone to make strides on this insane planet is with help from a human.

Megatron just squirming as trying to catch an organic without alerting one of those THINGS is going to be very very difficult.

Omph, I would say it would depend on the universe. Something like G1 will be for light-hearted when combined with Who Framed Roger Rabbit, but something like TFP or IDW would be darker. I mean, they're not human, so rights for them would be a long process across the century (or longer if we want to delve into a universe where all forms of cartoons were able to come to life).

I personally find it hilarious if there's actually more alien visitors in these kinds of crossovers, but humans think it's a running joke or a ridiculously long setup since they got used to a variety of space-themed Toons.

It doesn't help that Daffy Duck still has his Duck Dodgers costume, and the theme song plays whenever he comes across a Cybertronian.

Actually, retract it all. It's definitely G1 because the Autobots love basketball, and everyone knows Space Jam, so it really doesn't help with the Cybertronians' "we are from a completely different planet" stance.

Oh no, the 'bots will be hounded by scouts, both human and Toon, for the yearly games. Nothing gets Americans more riled up than their sport teams.

The 'cons join because they refuse to be left out.

Michael Jordan gets literally roped into another golf hole to be their basketball coach. Again.

[taiyami]

A collection of my favorite pride momentos from the last few months with varying context. Happy June 1st.

[lord-squiggletits]

Like I'm not one of those story "critics" who will nitpick the smallest inconsistency and call it a plot hole that ruins the whole story. I'm okay with inconsistencies and even the occasional plot hole if it ends up producing a story that's interesting, gripping, and brings up interesting things.

The problem is that suspension of disbelief only stretches so far. And secondly, stuff like character drama and themes are only as strong as the plot that supports them. If the plot is full of contrivances, plot holes, and really stupid things that make it feel like the author is just forcing something to happen to move the story along, then the themes and character drama become much less convincing.

[httpsserene]

𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐯𝐚𝐥 | 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐚𝐥𝐛𝐨𝐧

summary: alex tries to bribe you into giving him a second chance. you accept the bribe—but, only because it will benefit the seals. definitely not because you want to see him again, or anything.

pairing: alex albon x seal specialist fem!black!reader

from, serene: almost had to split this final part into two! i hope y'all don't mind me hitting that max photo limit loll happy reading, loves xxx

⌕ prev | join taglist | feedback & requests | upcoming chapters | table of contents | seal you later toc ↻

messages • yn -> coral • twitter dm's • alex -> yn

messages • max please unmute us gc -> alex

twitter • alex_albon • messages • yn -> coral

twitter dm's • alex -> yn

messages • • max please unmute us gc -> alex • yn -> coral

twitter

instagram • williamsracing & pacificmmc • october 12th

liked by f1, georgerussell63, seallygirlyn, and 85,734 others

williamsracing alex had a wonderful time on his private tour of the pacific marine mammal center! thanks to yn ln for showing us around and letting us meet some seals and seal pups! you can watch the tour video on our youtube through the link in our bio as well as donating to the pacific marine mammal center to help them conserve our oceans and wildlife!

pacificmmc alex_albon seallygirlyn

view comments

alex_albon: it was incredible to see the important work being done everyday to maintain our oceans firsthand! even better to be able to adopt optimus prime, my seal son <3

➥ charlesleclerc: find an original character trait albono 😡🙄 ➥ user1: f1 has become the most unserious sport in the world. ➥ user2: are you not entertained???

pacificmmc: it was a pleasure to host alex, even though he threatened to kidnap some of our pups ;)

➥ alex_albon: can you blame me? look at their faces! ➥ francolapinto: i am jealous 🥺 ➥ seallygirlyn: silly franco ☺️ only boys who break strangers phones and run away are allowed to do the fun pr events! ➥ francolapinto: 😂😂😂

user4: omg!!! yn and alex met again??!!! watching the video rn

➥ user5: IM SCREAMINGGG ➥ user6: the seal puppies little noises i just wanna take a lil bite ➥ user7: cute agression was on 💯💯💯

user8: alex making more alex noises as he had to feed the seals slimy fish 💀💀💀

➥ seallygirlyn: i almost confused his noises with the pups lol! ➥ user8: omg hiiii! you're literally living my dream! i want to work in marine conservation efforts just like you! ➥ seallygirlyn: visit our website for more on marine science and programs around the world < 3 i still feel like i'm living in a dream every day haha

seallygirlyn: alex was a very attentive guest! and he didn't even break any property :)

➥ alex_albon: please let it go already !!! ➥ alex_albon: what more do you want from meeeeee 🫠😫 ➥ seallygirlyn: my lost seal photos ➥ user9: holding a grudge 🤝🏽 seallygirlyn

messages • alex -> yn

instagram • williamsracing • october 20th • austin ⚑

liked by 43,592 others

williamsracing double points finishes for our boys this weekend! i wonder if it has anything to do with the seally good luck charm alex had on his side of the garage?

view comments

williamsracing: funniest moment this weekend was alex almost missing sprint qualifying because he was too busy talking to seallygirlyn

➥ seallygirlyn: I AM SO SORRY WILLIAMS F1 TEAM 🤧 ➥ coral: PLEASE DON'T BAN US !!! I WOULD LIKE TO ATTEND MANY MORE RACES ➥ francolapinto: yes admin do not be mean coral was very sweet 😇 ➥ coral: hwat? ➥ user10: franco needs to be castrated PLA

alex_albon: i ALMOST missed sprint qualifying—everybody’s freaking out for no reason 🥱

➥ alex_albon: also can you blame me? she was talking to me about jellyfish and i lost track of time ➥ seallygirlyn: this is the 2nd most embarrassing day of my life😖😭😭😭 ➥ user11: what's the first? ➥ seallygirlyn: when alex told the entire internet i cried when my phone broke ➥ user12: valid 😪

user13: she's a disrespectful guest and didn't respect the team's or alex's time the entire weekend. she should not be allowed to return.

➥ alex_albon: when? ➥ user13: when what? ➥ alex_albon: when did anybody ask for your opinion 🤨

messages • alex -> yn

twitter

igstory • alex_albon just uploaded!

[caption1; the only thing i cheat on is a diet plan][caption2; pretty views in santa monica]

replies limited

seallygirlyn: it was such a beautiful view! alex_albon: beautiful girl too 😏 seallygirlyn: smooth 😅

logansargeant: dude "pretty views" was the best you could come up with alex_albon: what's wrong with that???? logansargeant: i forget how old you are sometimes

twitter • postseason

instagram • seallygirlyn • january 23rd

liked by 32,973 others

seallygirlyn after review from the board (five water pups) he's awarded my seal of approval x alex_albon

comments on this post have been limited.

alex_albon: the amount of fish i had to feed them to get this distinction was frightening 😰

seallygirlyn: should've watched where you were running the first time we met < 3 alex_albon: but if i never ran into you, would we have ended up here?

instagram • alex_albon • january 23rd

liked by 1,592,368 others

alex_albon sealed it with a kiss x

view comments

seallygirlyn: love you seally boy 🥰

➥ alex_albon: love you more seally girl 🧜🏾‍♀️

georgerussell63: i always believed in you mate 💪🏼

-alex_albon: i vividly recall you bullying me everyday until i asked her out ➥ georgerussell63: how does that contradict the statement i made 🧐🧐🧐

user14: where's the two barbie dogs dancing gif when you need it? so happy for you both!!!!

user15: the other formula one drivers do not need to use this relationship announcement as a guide. please do a soft launch or you risk being responsible for my heart failing.

➥ alex_albon: does nobody remember the posts on my story like three months ago 😔 ➥ user16: TWO PHOTOS on a STORY from THREE MONTHS ago is not a soft launch YOU ASSHOLE 🤬 ➥ seallygirlyn: i did tell him that we should've had a proper sl :/

logansargeant: now when do i get to meet her 😈

➥ alex_albon: never 🫡 ➥ seallygirlyn: next time your in cali! we named a pup after you at the center :))) ➥ logansargeant: alex if you screw up this relationship i will never forgive you

maxverstappen1: i hate puns 😾

➥ landonorris: man just sealabrate this good time with us mate ➥ maxverstappen1: i'm going to flip out ➥ oscarpiastri: i hope you know that was also a pun 😂

general taglist (ask to join):

@saintslewis/@cherry2stems/@lorarri/@mindless-rock/@biancathecool

@barnestatic/@darleneslane/@lovingaphroditesworld/@smoothopz/@vetteltea

@tallrock35/@spideybv28/@loomiscorpse/@hiireadstuff/@namgification

@gg-trini/@multi-fandom-rando/@landoslutmeout/@love-simon/@iloveyou3000morgan/

@rexit-mo/@oscahpastry/@sweatrevenge5436-blog/@bokutos-babyowl/@oliviah-25

@evermoreandroyalblue/@riveristhebest1/@xylinasdiary/@ashiekins/@flowergirl1134

@hearts4robs/@c-losur3/@bloodyymaryyy/@awritingtree/@lammys-thinking

@nikfigueiredo/@bbreezyxoxo

seal you later taglist (closed):

@poppysrin @everythingabby101 @mangotaitai/@sumlovesjude/@nichmeddar

@panicforspec @formulaal @tellybearryyyy @greywritesthings @daddyslittlevillain

© httpsserene 2024 — photos used from pinterest. do not re-upload.

[baddecisionsgoooo0]

Transformers X Haso

I need more transformers x Humans are space orcs.

I need these smol, delicate humans the autobots have to protect to pull out Molotov cocktails and destroy decipticon joints.

I need a teacher to mix up a swimming pool size batch of oobleck and trap a cybertronian in it to protect his students.

I need humans using acid, or throwing rocks in joints, or otherwise inconveniencing decepticons while the autobots get more and more concerned.

I need Optimus or Ratchet to morosely bring up something that happened in the war, and a human to be like, "Oh that. Yeah, we made that illegal, it wasn't considered sporting." or "Wait, you guys have been fighting for how long, and that's the most extreme thing you did?"

I need a bot or a con to get curious and open a history book, and the next morning be traumatized by the shit humanity has done.

I need Humans that get tired of the whole, "Humanity is smol and fragile" shtick, and decide to go kill decipticons so they stop attacking the autobots.

I need Optimus to slowly realize we are not cute, fluffy little creatures, but agents of chaos and destruction. Beings who will destroy anyone and anything that threatens our family, and we consider the bots family.

[blackpensils]

Don't know where this came from. Read a story on Ao3, got inspired and spewed this out. I've never written for Transformers before so don't know how accurate this is but I don't know what to do with this so thought what better place to share it than this hellscape of a website (/p).

Tropes(?): arranged marriage because I'm a sucker for that shit between enemies. MegOp (tfa universe), sort of canon compliant if you squint hard enough but it's kinda short so don't squint too hard or you'll hurt your eyes.

He rolled his shoulders and adjusted the magnetic clamps attaching the long, and unnecessary heavy, cloak to his body. A cloak that normally should have been white, by not just Autobot standards, but also Iaconian, and Optimus, having been forged and brought online in Iacon, lamented the fact that the cloak he now sported had to be purple. Apparently it was supposed to be symbolic.

~~~

The reflection of the mech looking back at him was almost too foreign for Optimus to be able recognise it as being himself. It was his blue helm, his rotating optics as they scanned over his ludicrous but traditional get up and his red chassis that was covered in finely painted purple lines and curls. Delicate and every turn and swirl deliberate as they traveled from the centre of his chassis, right above his spark chamber, up his shoulders and down his arms. The painter had tried to insist Optimus should pain his thighs as well, saying that the purple would contrast wonderfully against the silver metal and that it would hold intimate implications. Optimus had refused.

That made Optimus snort and when he brought his optics back up to his face, his faceplate was scrunched up in a frown.

He looked almost right. Cloak billowing behind him in an almost majestic kind of way, making him feel a little like the Primes of old when they weren't just a military title but one granted by Primus himself, and paint decorating his upper torso with the usual lines and curves. Even his faceplate had purple paint across the cheeks and down from his bottom lip to his chin. Optimus had to admit that he did look like someone who was about to partake in his very own Conjunx Ritus, almost.

If it wasn't for the purple.

In Iacon the two participants in the rite would be cloaked and painted in white. To symbolise the purity of their love for each other and their connection to Primus, or something or other like it. Optimus didn't actually know the details. He'd never been to a Conjunx Ritus before.

It wasn't just any shade of purple either, unfortunately. Because Optimus might have been able to handle a light lilac or a deep rasin. But the fact that the shade that now decorated his frame just so happened to be Decepticon purple just made his spark tighten and made it impossible to forget that his… his conjunx was…

Optimus shuddered as his processor couldn't even finish the sentence without making a chill travel throughout his frame. Filling up his inner lines with ice instead of energon and making his spark twinge painfully in his chassis.

A Conjunx Rite was supposed to be the happiest moment of a mech's life. The day they joined forever with the love of their life and promised to cherish and protect their partner, their conjunx, for as long as they lived. A moment that most bots only ever did the once and never did again because the pain of losing a conjunx was so hard on the spark that taking another one was like replacing a part of your very soul. Trading it in for a replacement to fill the hole they left behind. Something that wasn't necessarily frowned upon or illegal in any way, but that definitely would've gotten a few judgemental glances thrown your way.

Yet here Optimus stood in a preparation room in one of Iacon's Chapels, looking at himself in the threeway mirror and meeting his own hollow optics. There was no happiness there when he looked down and saw himself dressed in the infamous Decepticon color and feeling like he was about to walk out onto that altar and meet his own demise.

Because his—Optimus had to physically swallow to get the words his and conjunx to actually form in his processor—was none other than Megatron.

[theangrycomet-art]

Figuring Out Elita's Squadron in TFP Style

Tired of my girls being Iced, so here's my two cents at Elita and her Squad in the Aligned timeline. (Cleaned up Moonracer's design too)

AltModes:

Elita 1: Heavy Duty Monster Truck

Chromia: SUV (a model like Toyota Highlander 2005)

Moonracer: Sports Car (GT 2004 Mustang)

Firestar: Truck (Checy 2004 4x4 Dulli Truck)

Lancer: Cybertronian Jet (has not selected a Earth Alt Mode)

Greenlight: Cybertronian Speedster, heavily Modded (no Earth Alt)

Random Facts:

Elita 1's forces had been in charge of the remaining war front on Cybertron. When the planet died, she then changed her focus to securing Energon for her troops by any means necessary.

she and Optimus have had very little contact despite their roles in the war due to... personal complications (aggressively sideeye's the matrix)

Chromia has somehow managed to acquire a lot of of high grade energon she breaks out on occasion. Though to be perfectly honest, she's collects them more for the bottles than anything.

Ultra Magnus "stole"/requested Moonracer for her sniping skills. He had also hoped she would be a "good influence" to her fellow Wreckers, which she was, in fact, not. (Partake the contents of Moonracer's Party Box at your own Risk)

Firestar has a cassette/minicon/recordabot(?) named Flaregun who helps her scout for any sorry souls left to die or looking for aid. Flaregun (who has not taken a vow of silence) has an extensive collection of corny jokes from her caretaker and her conjuxes.

Lancer, despite being one of the Autobot's few aerialists, is typically cooped up in their headquarters tracking down/securing the next energon heist location (nearby Decpeticon Warships are not excluded) or working on her research

Greenlight, though not usually an active combatant, has incredible aim with the box of hand grenades she got as a graduation present form a former colleague all those cycles ago. She is currently researching how to increase the fuel efficiency of a cybertronian, both in their weapons systems as well as their general systems

Oh yeah. And everyone pictured is widely believed to be dead.

COMMISSIONS OPEN

[sonicasura]

Transformers: Analog Horror Style

I've been talking about this on a non fandom related Discord and decided to bring it here. There are various analog horrors that utilize non horror series such as Splatoon 3 or Jurassic Park. It felt only right to add something like Transformers to the mix.

Extraterrestrial mechanical beings who can disguise themselves as various machinery, grainy footage and videotapes that only hold clues??? Perfect material for a horror. Here's some ideas that came to mind.

Decepticons

Nowhere is safe and one wrong move can potentially be your last. The Internet is a stalking ground so post or search with caution. Lest you wind up on Soundwave's radar. This Decepticon will be happy to light up his targets for one reason: an insidious hunt for the spy master's cassettes to enjoy.

Ever seen a beautiful sports car parked by the side with a sleek blood red paint job? DO NOT TOUCH. Unless you want to meet the same fate as all the others who run afoul with Knockout.

A terror in the skies that signals disaster wherever he appears. Pray the lone jet doesn't reveal it's true form. Don't look and hope he hadn't spotted you if a glimpse occurs. Survivors of Starscream are miniscule.

Results are all that matter. Morals? Worthless. Lives? Another opportunity to experiment. Emotions? Not needed. Shockwave only serves for the cause with lethal efficiency.

It is useless to hide. This will only excite him. Run as it chips away at his boredom. Fight and he'll be merry to slaughter the lamb caught in his gaze. All Hail Megatron as humanity is nothing but a plaything.

The only way this information can get through is by the way of analog. Find these tapes at your own risk. There is no turning back the moment the video starts. Decepticons don't lose their prey easily.

Autobots

It's nearly impossible to tell if they have good intentions unlike their more violent counterparts. The Internet is a double edged sword that needs to be regarded with caution. Autobots are at a greater disadvantage than you think. What little information about them is scarce.

Communication and knowledge is minimal. Some can speak but how comprehensible they are varies. The most understandable share only broken sentences that rarely blur into inhuman language. A few offer a 'soup' of linguistics which share little to no connection. Some play by the ear but don't understand what every word means. The remainder are mute, either speaking in their language or have no voice box to respond through.

Most don't understand how humans function. A situation that has led to people being slaughtered by Decepticons, accidental harm to the innocent, or danger by their fellow man who believe they gone insane. This has led to a decision from their leader, Optimus Prime.

Human help is REQUIRED. They need a liaison if the Autobots hope to even catch up to the Decepticons. Government related officials won't do as these humans are too volatile and always under Soundwave's surveillance.

What they need is a teacher. Someone who can offer such knowledge and not marked as a person of interest to their enemies. A bystander will do.

Pay attention to the car that appears outside your driveway. Look closer at the one following behind on the road. Did another join each car? Flee foolishly and they will give chase.

If the lights behind you disappear, DON'T RELAX. The Peterbilt is coming. Avoid him as he will trap you. Stop and the chance of escape dwindles. Turning off the engine was a bad mistake. DO NOT RUN. Optimus Prime will catch you and escape is impossible.

Welcome to the war. You can't escape until one side wins. The Autobots are guardians but also prison wards to their chosen liaison. You will be protected yet caution is still advised. Welcome to this new dangerous life.

That's it for now! Until next time folks, I'll see you later. Transform and Roll Out!

[ask-a-bot]

I dabbled in archery, but I just couldn’t get a handle on it.

Now Ax-throwing and throwing stars/knives were/are things that I love doing. I lean more towards throwing stars/knives because they’re easier to throw, and I wasn’t too shabby on my accuracy either! It’s a nice activity!

Prime, since you have a battle ax, would that be a sport you’d try or does that fall under the physical category?

You couldn't get a handle on archery with its arrows, so you had a go with axes and knives. Makes sense! I might have to give it a try, myself. Thank you for the recommendation!

[randomationality]

yeah uhhhh Optimus and Elita's sparklings for my goofy ass AU

(i suck at making names and stories omg, and im still working on their alt modes)

Elariel is older than Trion by two stellar cycles, making her older than Terminus by three. She enjoys writing and mathematical things like her dad does since she spends more time with him than Elita, but would not want to be the same kind of scientist he was. She'd rather be an astronomer, and venture across the stars. Although, her dreams and hobbies do not match her personality. She's really confident, loud but not that annoying kind of loud, and if someone messes with her or any of her friends or family, she's ready to throw hands. So she's the one who pretty much protects the others from any kind of trouble, and handles it REALLY well. But after fights, arguments and beef of such she does get a lecture coming home, and it's happened too many times she's used to it. Elita is proud of her for doing so but Optimus is still concerned and worried.

Trion is pretty much the same, but does more strong arguments than actual combat. He's a nice and selfless mech, helping those in need even if the problems are small or irrelevant to him. Since he's with his mom more, he's more engaged in combat-like things, but he just wants to keep peace in a more physical way. But this has also somehow brought him to a liking for sport, specifically Enerush*. He doesn't really find joy in reading, not because of it being boring, but because he can't read text properly. He finds the way text is normally put too close together, making it seem like the sentences are mixing up into a bar of blur. Elariel sometimes makes fun of him for this but jokingly.

Sometimes when the two get into 'satire' roast battles, Optimus takes it too seriously and starts telling them to not make fun of the other and be nice to each other. Elita on the other hand just finds this intriguing and funny. Anything Trion and Elariel do that seem 'harmful' in a way to Optimus is just something the two just do for funny reasons.

Fun facts yay!!!

Since Elariel, Trion and Terminus are the eldest ones, they're expected to take care of the little ones which they do, but most of the time just leave them to have fun on their own. And they mostly get told off if one of the lil' ones get hurt and they weren't there to help them.

When some other bots meet the three teens, they always think Trion and Terminus are basically Elariel's two body guards, but it's the opposite. Megatron tells Terminus to be like Elariel sometimes.

Haha, nicknames:

Riri, Ella (She hates that one)

Rio, Trai, Ryan (He gets annoyed with it, but actually doesn't mind most of the time)

[waterloggedsoliloquy]

mutual 1: sorry the update for my webcomic this week is a bit late! i really had to rush it so it prolly looks really sloppy lol [some of the most sophisticated comic art ive ever seen]

mutual 2: call me uterine lining the way astarions cervix got me bleeding profusely

mutual 3: do you think nanowrimo will give me a posthumous pity publishing deal if i mention it in my suicide note

mutual 4: okay fine i finally started revolutionary girl utena

mutual 5: does columbo know the service he did for butch lesbians. for all of us

mutual 6: wish you were here [blurry picture set of conifer woods in early autumn evening, taken as if frantically running down a winding trail]

mutual 4: im pretty hardy i dont need the trigger list but thanks for looking out for me guys

mutual 7: good morning lovelies another day the wizard tried to best me and another day i successfully locked him in the spare bathroom lol hope u like drinking shampoo fucker

mutual 8: here is a zip of every yuri manga scan i have and here is a backup in case i get dcma'd. the himejoshi lifestyle will never die

mutual 9: i wish i could go back in time to the shinzo abe assassination and ask to hold the doohickey

mutual 10: here's my essay on how wanting to be loved is the same as wanting to be eaten. three paragraphs in you'll find out that this is 100% tied to an obscure beauty and the beast manga i've been reading lately and how much i want to fuck the beast

mutual 4: oh thats why there was the trigger list.

mutual 11: YOU CAN'T LOCK ME IN THIS BATHROOM FOREVER

mutual 12: why do i have to defend my thesis to people i dont even respect. im not dickriding you just give me the degree

mutual 13: its just me and this scab ive picked into my scalp against the world

mutual 14: my little dragon got glazed and is ready to go into the kiln! everyone wish him good luck!

mutual 3: nvm i am a beautiful genius. perhaps the most beautiful genius of all

mutual 15: i think we should give david lynch rpgmaker and whatever happens happens

mutual 16: kpeyboaatrds brpokem gpuys

mutual 17: also heres my work in progress glossary of mixtec words! i still have a long way to go but i love being able to preserve my roots even in this small way

mutual 4: i just finished the black rose arc. question: what

mutual 18: i need emet-selch to be my wife

mutual 19: i need glados to be my husband

mutual 20: visited the ocean today!!! <3 beach pics!!! there is a darkness growing within me

mutual 21: the forms for my legal name change came in. pls vote in this poll of what my middle name should be: Dill Pickle (Dickle for short), Optimus Prime, Tumblr User Gorgonicteratologist, Smeve

mutual 22: just finished my 100th book of the year! this weeks read was the uses of enchantment by the psychologist bruno bettelheim,

mutual 23: reeses penis butter cups lol

mutual 4: i need to hunt akio for sport

mutual 24: oouugghhrgh. hot. dog.

mutual 25: your favorite character or fictional other would want you to brush your teeth and wash your face so you're well rested and wake up feeling refreshed! make them proud!

mutual 26: being a delivery driver isnt the worst job ive ever had but i do keep wondering what itd be like to drive off into the wild blue yonder one day and not come back

mutual 27: weird dog? [phone picture of critically endangered stork]

mutual 28: i think the two phone line polls in front of my house are having a lovers tryst. no way to prove it tho

mutual 4: WHAT

mutual 29: while you bitches are balduring your gates or finalling those fantasies im doing what a REAL gamer does. playing a b tier rpg that came out in 2004 for the 18th time

mutual 30: ^ real. hamtaro ham ham heartbreak is a masterpiece of interactive art. im not even going to call it a video game at this point

mutual 4: THAT'S HOW IT ENDS?! ANTHY?

mutual 31: can you help me pick which drawing looks better: 34% overlay or 36% soft light?

mutual 32: new video essay out. its called disability in video game narratives: final fantasy 14's most reliable fault. i churned the script out over an all-nighter and my mic crapped out halfway through but by god i did it

mutual 33: my new zine bundle is out! if you buy it you also get a discount on all my game jam games! i really cant wait for you to play them!

mutual 4: yall should watch revolutionary girl utena

[cyberrose2001]

hiii delicious writing like oh to be dicked down by a cybertronian until you look like you're about to pop from all the transfluids 😋😋😋

Anyways! I just got the image of you taking holoform!optimus out for some sightseeing and like, all the families and babies and stuff kinda spark his baby fever so either he has to take you back or drag you off to the nearest secluded area to dick you down HARD. Bonus if this isn't the first time its happened lmao, he seems like the sort that someone tells him its like he wants enough kids to form a sports team and answer with "yes :D" (not even for sports but you get it) anyways idk if brain is braining right but byyeee

(wriggles away)

i'm getting tfa optimus vibes along with tfp optimus, both could work

either way YEAH just watching all the little kids play with other kids, the parents standing by to make sure they're okay or even just mingling and talking about their babies is something that Optimus wants to do

and a SPORTS TEAM AKKDKSJ

he's gonna breed you and give you enough kids for a cube game 🫡

[quetzalpapalotl]

What is one of the wildest things about your blorbos you cant get over?

This specific Primacy panel that I think about all the time

Which is really far from the wildest thing Optimus has done but I'm obsessed with it because it's such a "he WOULD fucking say that moment". Like yes, of course Optimus does extreme sports to relax, that adrenaline junkie, of course he wants to survive and just be himself against nature without having to worry about being a Prime.

But the wildest thing to me about it it's that this is Metzen and Dille, the guys who famously wrote such a weird Optimus, Barber had to dedicate the half of an entire arc to make sense of him. But really this little tidbit is such an important aspect of how I read Optimus, I'm glad Primacy exists just because of it.