#ooc: venting

[cammy-mcspammy]

Vent translated through a komahina comic to comfort myself 💜

Also a skip and loafer ref AGAIN YOU CANT STOP ME

[codenamesazanka]

Need Spinner to rip Deku a new one

[Warning for some suicidal ideation]

•

At first, Izuku thought Iguchi Shuuichi didn’t hear him. Iguchi did not move. He was still looking away from Izuku. He said nothing, staying quiet for so long that Izuku thought maybe he should leave, and give Iguchi time to process and accept the news. Whatever was going through Iguchi’s head right now.

"...I killed a total of eight people..."

It was so soft and low it took Izuku a second to realize it was speech, that it was even a sound.

“Pardon?” Izuku asked.

“I killed eight people.”

Izuku stared at Iguchi in front of him. It sent a jolt through him, to remember that this man was a criminal, a murderer. He was dull all over and looked like he could barely sit up by his own strength, but Iguchi Shuuichi was a Villain, and he was speaking about the deaths of eight people with zero emotion. "W-What? Are you—this is a confession—"

If Iguchi was confessing, Izuku should go get Detective Tsukauchi, or—

"I plotted with the Front to destroy cities.” Iguchi said. Still toneless. Still looking away. “I watched Gigantomachia crush everything in his path. I led a riot against a hospital. I trampled over a dozen doctors and nurses—"

Izuku blinked. "You didn't actually do that. No one actually got hurt, luckily—"

"I did.” Iguchi said. “I'm a Villain, and I killed countless people.” It was then that he finally turned to Izuku. A blank, unseeing stare that shot right through Izuku. Iguchi’s eyes were pink, but the look in them was so empty that it was like the color had leached out, replaced with a glassy hollow-pink gray.

Izuku flinched, but took a deep breath. “...You did. So it’s good you’re confessing. And now… you can… repent—”

“So kill me."

"What?"

"Kill me,” Iguchi repeated.

Izuku grimaced. “I’m not going to do that.”

“Kill me.”

“No,” Izuku said firmly, and stood up. “I’m going to go get Detective—”

He saw the moment when Iguchi’s eyes bursted with a manic light, as if everything came back, and with it, finally, all the emotions that Izuku had expected when he first came to tell Iguchi his leader’s last words. Iguchi exploded.

“Just kill me!” Iguchi roared, struggling against his restraints, so hard it shook the hospital bed. “I'll–I���ll kill you, if you don't stop me right now! Kill me!"

Izuku’s fist clenched automatically at the threat, the muscle memory of when he had One For All. But One For All was gone, and Iguchi was bound up tight. "I'm not going to do that! I don't kill—"

"You killed him!”

The scream made Izuku reel back.

“You killed Shigaraki!” Iguchi suddenly jerked away again, eyes squeezing shut. He curled in on himself, though he was still yelling. “You killed him, so kill me too!”

“I didn’t—!” Shiga–Shimura Tenko’s body crumbled to dust due to the damage it had taken. Everyone agreed that regeneration had failed at some point, and Shimura was already falling apart. The collapse was inevitable.

“You killed him!” Iguchi sounded hoarse now, as if the yell just before had damaged his throat. “He died. He died in front of you and you let him die. So—” The voice broke completely. “So why can’t you let me die too? Let me die with him."

Ragged breathing filled the room. Izuku let it go on for a count of ten, allowing Iguchi to calm down, allowing himself to find the words. “...That’s not how it works. Shimura Tenko died, but you’re still—”

“Shut. Up.” Iguchi curled in on himself further. “Just kill me and let me die. I don’t care. Just let me… Just let me go see him.”

“You can’t follow him,” Izuku said. In the back of his mind, he faintly thought that Shigaraki would’ve been pleased to see that his League was still loyal to him. “Iguchi Shuuichi, your leader is dead, but you can’t follow him. You have to—”

Iguchi made a sharp, jagged sound, the imitation of a laugh. “I have to. Are you really just some kid, that you don’t get it? I love him.”

Izuku froze.

“...I loved him,” Iguchi said. He breathed out the words. “Shigaraki Tomura. My heart was empty until I met him. He was— I wanted—” Iguchi trailed off. “...I loved him."

The horizon that Spinner was looking forward to, Shigaraki Tomura had said, grinning. It had felt so random, him mentioning one of the League in the middle of battle, as he was destroying Mt. Fuji. If Spinner is alive, tell him—

Were you… acknowledging his feelings? Izuku wondered, tentatively, to those memories of Shigaraki. Did you know? Your last words… did you do that, just for him?

Iguchi was weeping now, tears leaking out of his still shut eyes, trailing down his face and falling onto the hospital sheets. One wet dot, two dots, three, merging into a misshapen, growing stain.

Iguchi was unforgivable. Shigaraki was unforgivable. They had done unforgivable things. But still Izuku had said to Shigaraki, I saw you crying, and he knew he needed to help. How could he not? Someone was in pain, and saving them was obvious.

But now your friend is crying. The immediate, most obvious way to help Iguchi right now, Izuku couldn’t help but think was… if you were here…

And there was a déjà vu too—Gentle and La Brava…

Izuku’s stomach twisted when he realized there was nothing he did for La Brava, when she was crying, knocking her small fists into him. It was Gentle who shoved him off and held her. Gentle was the one to dry her tears.

No one else could’ve done it.

"There's no point in me living,” Iguchi whispered. “My family has disowned me by now. The League is gone. Shi... Shigaraki is gone. There's nothing left. So just let me die."

“I… don’t think he… would’ve wanted you to die,” Izuku carefully offered. “If you were fri— more than friends, he would’ve wanted you to live. Right?”

Iguchi made that sharp barking laugh again. “I'm going to jail for the rest of my life. And there is no life I want, not without—” Iguchi broke off.

“It’s not the end of the world,” Izuku tried to say. “You have to live, and things will change—”

“The future has no place for me in it,” Iguchi said. Tears dripped off the tip of his mouth. “I never had one, anyway. After all this, I’m…”

A sob. “If we didn't let him go into surgery… I wanted him to stay, but he was so excited… And I knew he wasn’t himself anymore, I knew All For One was lying to me, I knew all that! But I didn’t do anything. I didn’t know what to do. I did nothing, and now he’s gone. I should’ve… I don’t know, I don’t know, but I should’ve done something.”

Izuku bit his lips. This was, at least, something they had in common. “...It was the same for me too. I saw All For One and him being… stuck together. I couldn’t ignore that, so I wanted to help him too. I wanted to save that cry—save him, but…” He sat back down. “Maybe… if we had worked together… If you came to us earlier…”

“...save him?” Iguchi rasped.

Izuku nodded. “I really did. I wanted to save him.”

Iguchi slowly raised his head. “You killed him. You fought him to death. Heroes wanted him dead. Hawks killed Twice and everyone just accepted it. You… You never said anything. What do you mean, ‘if you came to us earlier…’

That hollow look in Iguchi’s eyes was back.

“You never said a single word about saving him.”

[eggskie]

[Image ID in alt text]

retrospective

I think sometimes that shadow thinks back about his time on the ark with maria, and with gerald. and that some of his memories of gerald aren't great. and that now, with the knowledge of what gerald did to him after maria's death, some of those memories may mean something different with that new context. he doesn't like thinking about it

[frosty-tian]

Even if it’s something you said out of anger, it’s still something you can never take back.

[billcipher-rpblog]

What’s this, Cipher? You’re cursed to tell the truth? Hah, who should I be writing my thanks to for this indulgent humbling? I think I’ll likewise pester you with questions myself.

What are your next plans?

How much of your powers have been returned?

And…why exactly haven’t you killed me yet? You’ve had plenty of chances. I’ve been…wondering. (…I’m not so foolish to think it lingering regard.)

- @ford-between-dimensions

TSK TSK TSK, ALWAYS HERE FOR A REUNION, AREN'T YOU, FORDSIE?

ALRIGHT, FINE, YOU KNOW WHAT? I'LL ADMIT, I DON'T HAVE A PLAN! FOR ONCE!

WITH THAT DUMB FRILLY FISH WATCHING MY EVERY STEP LIKE I WERE SOME OVERGROWN CHILD, I CAN'T DO ANYTHING WITHOUT BEING BABYSAT! IT'S EMBARRASSING!

AND ALL MY POWERS HAVE BEEN RESTORED TO THEIR MAXIMUM POTENTIAL! HAH! AT LEAST THIS DUMB TRUTH CURSE WON'T LIE ABOUT THE COOL THINGS! SUCKERS!

HAHAHAH! WHAT'S WITH THE PERSONAL QUESTIONS, SIXER? CURIOUS?

[mikakuna]

actually the thing that pisses me off when fandom talks about the titans tower incident isn't even just that people wildly misinterpret/overreact to it, but that they only care about it because it happened to tim

half the other unhinged shit jason has done towards heroes (beautiful and spectacular) is like. never brought up. the titans tower incident is just tim fans' way of angsting up their blank canvas

[thestarsandskyaboveus]

you: muriel i think i'm a bad person

muriel:

muriel: y/n i have Killed People

[kusatta]

okay, i seriously think i need to take a break from this rpc. i hate feeling like just a number, or rather a trophy — just something to collect. that's all i feel when i log on here. like i'm not a person, that i'm just something that needs to be hoarded or stash away. i am a number. i don't feel cared for, or valued. it's all so superficial. i'm just tired. i'm so so so tired.

[ask-the-rag-dolly]

including the anons. i've also had enough of this lady's bs. like can someone throw Ragatha into therapy please?

i'm actually frustrated at this character in a tumblr blog because she is just so stubborn in the way she is thinking. that might be intentional but still. It's like she's defending everyone but when you apply the same logic to her, she's like "no it doesn't count for ME!" it just shows how much (or little) she thinks of herself, and the part where she doesn't think of herself as "human", but that same thought doesn't apply to the rest of the cast? just. grr. It's like she's intent on hating herself and making sure she never has a sense of self worth, which is also probably intended.

thanks mod bee for making me want to hug my screen and also smash in into the floor like a bug. I haven't been this invested in something like this for a long time!

hsfhsf this is a bit strange to me in a positive way cause i never expected anyone to feel this much for a silly tadc tumblr ask blog ! it surprises me everytime

i did intend ragatha to be frustrating . there's something interesting behind a character that's so hard to hate but just so , so hard to Not Throttle either . she's so fucked up in the head that it's tempting to help her , but it's going to be a very hard and frustrating journey because it's untangling Years of trauma and unhealthy coping mechanisms . absolutely horrible . i'm giving her an ipad and putting on youtube kids

[manganyeh]

Do people hate me on this platform because of the things I don’t mean to say and when I do say them it’s already too late I know sorry isn’t going to make anything better for me so to everyone I have offended I’m actually truly sorry and I will try to do my best to make things better…

please don’t hate me

[batdroiid]

i can't change my interests! they're my defining character traits! they're what my friends expect from me! I can't be constantly changing because then people won't keep up with me!

[oopsiedaisymae]

i really wish people who uwu-ified the obey me cast to the point of making them incompetent would take a minute and think about how fucking obnoxious a grown man can manage to be when he's being a pain in the ass on purpose. you wouldn't lovingly chuckle at his antics you would throw knives at him be so fuckin fr

[doakarma]

Nobody needs me. Nobody. Nobody.

[crimesought]

You know, sometimes I wish I talked to people more on Discord. There's no reason really beyond I feel like I miss things.

[eyesofcuriosity]

Just mun's random thoughts hmm hmm

It's one of those days when thoughts come to mind where one reflects on their past actions and feelings and starts to have unsavory thoughts. I love to write and chat with people I meet here, and also build relationships either romantic or platonic! That being said I know that I can get over-excited about such things that I tend to well send my partners stuff like silly pictures, memes, music, etc.....which now that I think can appear as overbearing maybe?

And I totally get that sometimes people are busy, the social battery isn't there, hell I get those periods myself where I just wanna chill and play games or read manga. Totally relatable!

But then I recall a few times in the past when I got blocked by RP partners for well....asking if everything was alright or if I had offended them somehow.... maybe I have somehow? Idk I'm not always socially aware so to my current partners and friends, hey guys if I'm ever bothering you too much with stuff or whatever, please feel free to tell me when it's annoying or just iffy I will understand!

now......back to gaming!

[meeeeeraiiiiiodonnnn]

//weird thing but like. im kinda worried for thr kids in the pkmn irl community? less and less people are tagging things as suggestive and even kids themselves are making sexual jokes. not even middle school level ones. like.

im kinda uncomfortable here now.