#one more day of work tomorrow

[july-19th-club]

seriously have been thinking about this all night long. call me autistic but the fact that 90% of workplaces the point is not to get your work done and then be done doing it but to instead perform an elaborate social dance in which you find something to do even when you're done doing everything you need to do in order to show your fellow workers that you, too, are Working . because you are at Work . disgusting why cant we all agree that if there is no work immediately to be done. we just dont do anything

[ricky-mortis]

Hatchetfield @femslashfortnight Day 1: Make It Sapphic AU

[girlboyburger]

hi i'm alive i'm just struggling my way to happiness & productivity

[mitskikissme]

My very rushed love letter to @rowdyknives fanfic what it means to love her. hes such a talented writer no jokeee

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Preview of the runner up results from this poll. I wish everyone who wanted to see more SVSSS characters from me a merry "I'm So Sorry'.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

news!

looks like we have one more day to wait Excitedly! i'll be streaming tomorrow the, i suppose!

[somegrumpynerd]

How absolutely wild must it have been for Nightmare to have like, minimum-to-no contact with mortals for hundreds of years and then the first two he has any regular close interactions with are Killer and Dust.

Like he must have a book in his castle somewhere of all the observations he kept like he was studying a new species

[factorialsotherfandoms]

"Do you think Philza's okay?"

Fit rolls over to look at Pac, his roommate staring up at the ceiling. He reaches over, cautiously offering his hand. Pac, of course, takes it just as hesitantly.

"Cell's back, maybe after you, and you're worried about Phil?" Okay, so Fit is worried too, but his point is well made. Pac had only told him some of the situation, in whispered tones and terrified whimpers a few hours ago, and he was worrying about someone who was at least safe?

Pac turns his head, and looks Fit dead in the eye. "You're with me. I know you won't let anyone hurt me. But who's with him?"

"He's safe enough," Fit says. "Physically at least."

"He just didn't seem, ah," Pac struggles with his words for a moment. "Well?"

"It's not really my place to say," he replies. "But he's Philza. He'll be fine."

"Will he?" Pac asks, fretting already. "If the Federation is inside his head, making him see things..."

It's a worry Fit has too, one he really doesn't want to think about. He wants to pretend that his old friend is fine, that going and murdering blazes and magma cubes will have fixed everything. He needs to believe it, because the alternative... The alternative is there's nothing he can do.

"Do you really believe him?" Pac asks. "That there was a book there."

"Yes."

"Why?"

Fit sighs, and sits up. He turns on the lamp and stretches, looking around his room of missing texture flooring and ugly walls - the safest place he could think to bring Pac when he heard the news.

"It's not the first time," Fit says. "Phil... He swears it was a dream, that he was just sleeping. He wasn't. Tubbo and me? We checked every corner of his house. He wasn't there. Then he takes us to where he thought he was taken and he swears there's nothing weird about it? But it's full of parrots - they shouldn't have spawned there. Tubbo even found an avocado sapling."

"Philza has a lot of avocados," Pac agrees. "You think the Federation took him?"

"I'm not sure, it's not their usual behaviour," Fit frowns. "But I don't know who else it would be?"

"The codes?"

"Maybe." Fit cracks his head to the side. "But I know Phil. Whatever he saw? It terrified him. And anything that scares Philza Minecraft is nothing you ever want to see."

"Should we ask him if we can visit?" Pac has a calculating look on his face. "I can cry scared all over again, I just need to remember why. And his bunker is very safe. They might look for me in your house, but they'd never think of his."

"Why? Is my company not good enough for you?" Fit is mostly teasing.

Mostly.

"No! No, no, no," Pac waves his hands in a desperate attempt to be understood. "I just... I'm worried, you know?"

"Yeah..." Fit sighs. "Yeah, I'm worried too... I'll ask him."

Pac nods, and Fit types.

You whisper to Ph1LzA: Can I bring Pac over? We might need to stay the night.

Ph1LzA whispers to you: sure mate

Ph1LzA whispers to you: is everything okay?

You whisper to Ph1LzA: We'll explain when we get there

That's the end of that; Fit shows his communicator to Pac, who agrees.

"I'm not really faking the tears," Pac promises, already tearing up. "I just don't think about it, and then it isn't real."

Pac's not the only one acting like that, Fit presumes; Philza's constant denials even with evidence in front of him... Whatever the fuck happened in that forest, it's nothing good. Something so terrible believing his memory is at fault is somehow better.

"To Phil and Missa," Fit reminds Pac, not really needing it.

They warp together, and at the same time.

---

Philza is waiting at the top of the hatch when the pair arrive. To most people he would look entirely normal, but Fit can see the way his eyes flitter as he waves. Pac waves back, while Fit gives his traditional "oi!!!"

Philza laughs, and leads them down into the basement.

"What's up?" he asks the two of them. "Need more toast or something? I thought you were both asleep."

"No, um," Fit looks to Pac, realising they didn't quite work out what to say.

"Bagi told me more about the murders," is what Pac says, his voice dropping very quiet as he does. "She thinks... We think someone from my past is on the island."

"Shit," Philza closes his eyes for a moment. "How bad is it?"

"Last time I saw him," Pac's pace picks up; Fit squeezes his shoulder as he sees panic come in. "Last time... He nearly killed me. And the messages..." Pac grabs the hand on his shoulder and squeezes it back. "Some of them might be addressed to me."

Philza doesn't ask questions, he just glances around his children's bedroom, then looks at Fit. Fit meets his eyes.

Philza sighs, and caves.

"Alright," he says. "Do you want to sleep in Chayanne's room? I can adjust the door to just the three of us, Missa, and my eggs for now."

Fit knows it isn't for Pac's sake that Philza is changing the doors, he knows it for sure.

They get their beds set up, tucked behind the chests where a casual observer cannot see. Philza doesn't have a bed, but Fit makes them for him and Pac, placing them tucked away.

"Would you stay with us?" Fit asks, before his old friend can slip away.

Philza looks genuinely surprised by the request, "why, mate? I'll just be in the eggs' room."

"Safety in numbers, right?" Pac asks, glancing between the two. "I would... Feel safer if you were here too."

Fit knows its a manipulation tactic to convince Philza to stay, to make sure the old crow is not alone. It still rings so very true - and so very against everything ingrained within Fit's soul.

It's fine. For a few nights he can manage it, if its what his two closest friends need.

"Alright," Philza hesitates, but comes over and sits on the edge of Pac's bed. He takes off his backpack, and leans his scythe just in reach. Pac and Fit take the opportunity to remove their prosthetics, hastily reattached to travel over here, and stretch.

When Philza stands again, both of them can see how unstable he looks.

"Let's push our beds together," Fit says. "If we put Pac between us, there isn't an angle they can get him from."

Philza looks at Fit, and knows exactly what he's doing. Still, Philza crafts up a third bed, and squishes it between the two.

He nearly falls as he walks around to do it; Fit catches him, helps him steady, but is brushed off before he can say a word.

"Alright," Philza says. "Pac in the middle then. You won't get too warm, will you?"

"I'm Brazilian," Pac says. "It's always too cold here now Mike is gone."

They both see how heavily Philza drops to the bed, curling himself back to Pac and defensively ready. Fit, on his side, curls close to Pac - his one arm over him.

It's not really a surprise how quickly Pac falls asleep, with the sheer trauma and strain of the day on his back. He quickly falls into dreams, and Fit can only hope they are kind.

"Phil," he asks, once he knows Pac is asleep. "Won't you sleep?"

"You needed a guard," Philza says.

"You know we don't. You and I? We'll wake if anything so much as tests the hatch."

It's true, and they both know it.

Philza, however, doesn't speak.

At least, not for a long time; Fit considers conversation a lost cause and is about to give up and call this good enough when he hears Philza again, voice broken just like it was in the garden.

"If I sleep, will I wake?" is what Philza asks, whispered almost silently. "How will I know when the world is real again? What will I see this time?"

"I'll make sure you wake up," Fit promises, because he can. "And I'll do something to make you absolutely certain its really me."

"Promise?"

Philza sounds so weak, so small like this. Fit... Fit cannot stand it, not at all. He reaches a little further, and manages to put his hand on Phil's shoulder.

Philza's own hand reaches over, clinging to it.

"I promise," Fit says. "We'll wake you if we leave. We won't let anything weird happen, its just sleep."

Philza turns, and his eyes do not seem to trust Fit. But they are also exhausted, and desperate, and terrified.

"Go to sleep, Phil. I won't until you do."

"I'm sorry," Philza whispers, sounding absolutely broken. "Thank you. Both of you. I know... I'm sorry."

Fit squeezes his shoulder again.

"It'll be alright," Fit replies. "I've got you. I've got both of you. It's going to be okay."

Nothing else is said before they eventually fall asleep.

[cerise-on-top]

OMG HI AGAIN!!!! I have so many ideas floating around in my head rn it isn't even funny aghhh but I hope you'll accept another request of mine because my brain will not let me rest!!!

oksay so price, nikolai, farah nd rudy with a very touchy affectionate husband? we're talking always wants to spoon them or having them lay on top of him so he can run his fingers through their hair, hugging them from behind whenever he can especially when cooking because he wants to bury his face into their hair, just peppering kisses all over their face to see how flustered they can get or something, etc etc..!!! o my gaur I cannot shut up😭

OKAY THATS ALL AND AS ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU CAN IGNORE AND DELETE MY REQUEST IF IT'S PRESSURING YOU IN ANY WAY OKAY BYE!!! HAVE AN AWESOME WEEK<3

— sincerely, 🦗

Hey there! Not even sure if you're still around ^^; I'm really sorry for taking this long to get to your request, but hey! I did it at all! I just really needed this break! Not sure if I'll ever reopen my requests for Call of Duty, though! Anyway, this request was really sweet, I hope I did it justice :>

Price, Rodolfo, Farah and Nikolai with an Affectionate!Husband

Price: He’s in heaven with you. Price adores physical affection since it’s quite the stark contrast from what he’s usually used to. It’s not uncommon for him to initiate physical affection either. As seen in the games, he pats his soldiers on their shoulders fairly often, so he’s definitely not above giving you a bear hug either. But if you start it? Oh, you’ll never be rid of him. You can hug him, snuggle him, pat him, he’s very compliant. But he will repay your loving kindness by showing you some physical affection of his own. For every hug you give him, you will be hugged twice as long. For every kiss you give him you will be kissed back twice. Will sometimes fight you on who gets to be the big spoon, though. He loves holding you, it’s a privilege that he likes to think only he gets. Won’t ever complain about you holding him, though. It’s nice to feel your warmth against his back. It’s kind of difficult to fluster him since he’s hopelessly in love with you. As concerned as he might grow if he catches you, he’d be so enamored with you if you shed a tear or two because you love him so much. That would be one of the only times you could render him actually speechless. As long as you keep being touchy with him, he’ll be touchy with you. It’s not unlikely for the two of you to hang onto each other as if the world would fade if you didn’t. Neither of you mind, though.

Rodolfo: Unlike Price, he’s very easy to fluster. If you stare at him for too long, with a goofy grin on your face, the most lovestruck expression as you hold his face in your hands, he’s a goner. He’ll avoid eye contact, he’ll curse in his mind as well. You’re just too cute. How could he ever have gotten a husband as lovely as you? Wants to hug you and bury his face in your shoulder so bad so you won’t see how flustered he is. Will likely do just that as well. But other than that, he actually loves how touchy you are. There’s just something so soothing about you touching him. Holding his hand, hugging him, running your fingers through his hair. Has probably fallen asleep to that more than once. You’re just such a loving and lovely husband. He wants to bask in the glory that is your gentle touch. He craves it so much, it’s not even funny. Sometimes, he’ll ask you if you can be the big spoon since he loves being the little spoon. You would never judge him for that, he knows that much, and for that he’s grateful. Not as lenient with kisses as you are, though. Pepper his face in them and he’ll get flustered. Once he gives you a kiss back, you’ll likely make a face like this 😊 while he just looks away. Give him a hug so he can hide his face, he’ll appreciate it.

Farah: She’s a strong and resilient woman, who knows what she wants and needs. She may seem like she’s got everything under control, but she’s actually so touch starved, it’s not even funny. Although she may have a reputation, she’s not above clinging to her lovely husband like a koala when you’re alone. You clinging onto her while you’re cuddling makes her feel like the strong person out of the two of you, though. She can’t exactly tell you why, but it’s kind of like the thing where a bunny gets licked and is thus the dominant bunny. Although she may not ask for the physical affection, she receives it anyway, and for that she’s grateful. Good luck trying to fluster her, though. She doesn’t fluster easily and will always try to one up you, trying to fluster you instead. She can be quite the witty woman, she can also be quite the romantic, so she’ll most definitely succeed at some point. Gives you many kisses in return since you seem to be very keen on them. Always hugs you back. Will sometimes face you while cuddling so she can be tucked away safely under your chin. Although receiving affection from you is a sign of her dominance for her, she will sometimes show you affection as well. This is also a sign of her dominance. Even if you’re much taller than her, she’ll sometimes pull you down to her level so you can bury your face in her shoulder. As much as she loves being the object of your affection, she wants to give you something in return as well. Life is a constant give and take, after all.

Nikolai: You cannot fluster this man, I’m sorry. You could call him the most embarrassing nicknames, you could treat him like the most dainty, fragile princess out there and he won’t bat an eye. He’s been through too much to be fazed by anything at this point. Whether or not he’s a touchy guy is entirely dependent on you. And since you’re a very touchy feely man, he is too. Not as much as you are, but he’ll pull you closer to him by your waist, he’ll kiss the crown of your head, he’ll hold your hand. Will battle you for dominance, though. You’re being affectionate with him? You’re trying to hold him? Are you sure about that? This man has been a soldier for most of his life, he can fight. And if he needs to playfully fight you for the privilege of being the big spoon, he will. You need to see him as a reliable and strong man, so he will provide you with physical affection as well. You may try to put his head on your chest, but it won’t be there for too long before your head is on his chest. It’s a matter of pride to him as well. Loves how physically affectionate you are, though. Adores it when you give him a million kisses wherever you can reach. He’ll just sit still and let you before trapping you in a big bear hug. He’s so glad he’s married a man like you. There’s no one he’d rather be with.

[fuckingshitupjacket]

Happy name day Mina darling <3

[fragonreal]

flustered fucking dumbass

[kirstielol]

I'm making a tote bag as my first big sewing project, and today I made the straps and they turned out so good 😭

[nikolas-ghostbusters-fixation]

Something I've been thinking a lot about lately is how everyone thought Egon had gone insane. What Happened that made them think that. They've fought a gigantic Stay Puft Marshmellow Man TWICE (counting the 2009 video game because iirc it's canon? Correct me if I'm wrong), fought an interdimensional god, fought a blood thirsty ruler that killed thousands and was hated by all that was trapped in a painting (and managed to get in to beat him by making THE STATUE OF LIBERTY start walking down the street with slime that reacted purely based on vibes), found an underground abandoned transit system full of the moodslime, had a bathtub try to eat Dana and her baby, fought a giant murderous black widow lady, fought the fisherman ghost who turned an entire hotel floor into the bottom of a ocean, and that's not even mentioning them getting trapped on an island that randomly raised up from underwater that had been abandoned for decades created by Ivor Shandor who worshipped Gozer. So what did he do or say that made everyone else think he'd gone insane?? All I can think is maybe he was acting strange / eratic before, but he's always been like that to some degree.

I don't know. It's something that I've been thinking about. The correct answer is 'it's not that deep and they needed a reason that the others weren't together anymore and weren't aware of Egons death or know what was going on,' but also. What Was He Saying that prompted everyone, including Ray, to think he lost his mind when he'd been right almost every time before that.

I'm genuinely so curious as to what he was up to before this. What was he doing. What insane idea was working on prior to this or was he even working on anything at all??

Also want to clarify this post isn't negative 😭 I really love the newer movies and their lore / the newer storyline / characters, I just like thinking about small stupid things like this. Gives me something to think about / speculate about / figure out an answer to.

[swallowtail-ageha]

I think someone should study the fact that all of the moral issues people have with coleen hoover are just the modern day version of "this erotic literature will corrupt our pure women!"

[sage-is-in-fact-very-tired]

some ashril cosplay updates!!!

ears -

they got all the earrings!!

and pocket number one (of four)!!

each pocket is gonna have a different design - this one being swirly lines and things :D

[aibouart]

admittedly, i am afraid to talk about this, but have wanted to for a long while. i don't see a lot of people discuss this kind of thing, but i decided to do so for the me who was struggling and didn't know. also i have no idea where i am going with this and it's very late for me rn so here's a whole ass ramble on vent art. and also a bit more on how it's impacting how i view my art, now. i am terribly sorry if it's not very cohesive, my thoughts on it aren't yet cohesive either WOOPS

i wanted to talk a bit about how vent art really impacted my mental health, and how the idea that art needs some kind of meaning to have meaning really has been weighing on me lately (i know this is a concept i am assigning to my work and is not actually the norm/standard expectation of others consuming art. but it IS a sentiment i have seen enough that does impact me).

i want to specify, obviously i am not saying vent art is bad.

nor that doing vent pieces, or vent blogs, will ultimately result in what i went through for a number of years. rather, that this did happen to me, and there is a near impossible chance i am a unique case in any experience i will ever have. if you do vent art and it helps you, that's good! im not judging anyone for anything here. if your experience does not match my own, that's what it's like to be human~. i am not invalidating anyone on purpose by sharing my own experience. sorry for the insane disclaimer but it will eat me alive if i go to sleep thinking "what if they think x cuz i didn't say y and think im a terrible person"

---

i used to do vent art frequently (you won't find much on here as it was uploaded to a personal at the time). anytime i felt down or had a line of dialogue in my head making me feel bad in a way, i would draw for it. but the way i had interacted with it was really unhealthy. it became a terrible feedback loop where i'd feel bad, draw how i felt bad, look at the art, and ruminate even more on how i felt bad, until it spiralled so out of control i would lose touch with reality and get lost entirely in feeling like garbage.

i would just get so lost in the cycle with vent art that it would make my mental space worse and worse, and i would use the vent art as a negative confirmation bias. the words that hurt me i wrote down and anytime i looked again, they would hurt me again. but i would keep looking, and i would keep drawing.

i have always used art as an outlet, but for some reason the way vent art impacted me was unhealthy. it wasn't a good outlet. and it took me years to cut ties with it. i relied on vent art for a long time, but it took a lot of introspection and thinking to realise it wasn't the release i thought it was. and it was hard to let go, too.

i haven't touched the blog in a few months, now. i haven't done much vent art at all since then and genuinely, i've been doing SOOO much better. i no longer ruminate nearly as much as i had done so, i no longer get caught in a feedback loop that lasts for days to weeks. i still feel like garbage like people tend to do, but i don't put myself in a cycle over it anymore. i have gone back to it a few times in moments of desperation, but what used to be every week/every few weeks is now once a month maybe. and not to the extent at all (i would oftentimes post ~20 images in one night, before).

but i keep thinking about how, while the way i had done vent art was bad for my mental health, i keep feeling that just because i do sparkly cute and happy drawings, now, or drawings with no real meaning, that my art has nothing beyond face value... i do like a lot of my vent art. i think their compositions, or hidden messages and meanings, or colour use, was interesting.

but it wasn't worth the price for me.

so i am a bit caught in an in-between, here. my favourite form of art is the expression of love-you liked something so much, you dedicated time to draw it. and yet i cannot ascribe that to my own work very often. i think that man i wish i could make art with some kind of deeper meaning, that speaks to people, that's more than just pretty colours or shiny shading or a character everyone likes, or a character i like. but i just... don't know if it's for me.

ultimately, i could develop a healthy relationship with expressing and exploring negative emotions or experiences through art, but... do i want to? do i have to? do i need to? is it not enough to just draw something because... i like it..?

of course, the answer is yes, draw what you want, draw how you want, it's your art. but i am still trying to come to terms with that idea. i dont want to be seen as some shallow artist who just draws what's cute and pretty because they can and it's all they can think of, but like what if that's just what i like to draw??

in the end, that alone is good enough, drawing because you like to, because it's fun, because you like the thing you're dedicating time to creating for. it's just hard to grapple with after discarding a type of art that i felt was the only way i drew "for real".

anyways i am sorry this is soooo fucking long, and for all the clarifications (IM STILL NOT SAYING VENT ART BAD AND EVERYONE WILL DO WHAT I DID!! Dx) and the fact i had no real point here (probably)

anyways i will continue to draw what i want because i like to, as i have always been.