#once I graduate im gonna bing
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The longer 2024 gose on, I get a bit more hope that tssm might come back
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my mom wont trust me, she thinks im making bad decisions but im just trying to see what works for me. she wants me to at least graduate but idk if i can even make it to graduation, im fucking exhausted but im still trying so hard. i want to graduate and study too, trust me i do but im so fucking tired. no school i go to has been right for me, and im too scared to go back to traditional bc im worried ill repeat what i went through before. locking myself in the bathroom trying to catch my breath/crying. skipping school so often i maybe went once a week. and bc of how low i was at that point i fell behind in school. i dont want to be that student that was held back.
the reason i chose to drop out the school im currently in is bc its suffocating, the time limit and outrageous amount of work, i even called my dad the other day and told him abt the work and he even said âamerica is trying to keep kids dumb at this point, i dont get your school its so stupidâwhen my dad first came to america he didnt even go to a traditional high school he went straight into trade school. and hes been trying to push me to go to one as well but idk what trade i even want to pursue. he wants me to follow his footsteps and take culinary since i enjoy cooking, but im interested in medicine but at the same time i dont have the credentials for it and idk how well i can do and idk what other options there is for me.
and im trying to lose weight but either maintain or binge eat my feelings. im not moving on the scale and i hate it. im gonna attempt to âïžve for a bit as see where it leads, hoping that i fall back into honeymoon. my aim is to lose 10kg in february or get back to my lw.
plus i have a doctors appointment she wants to discuss my test results so idk whats gonna happen but until then i wanna lose as much weight as possible.
if anyone has advice too that would be helpful cause idk what to do.
#ana trigger#@na rules#ana male#bul1m14#ed male#tw ana shit#ana rant#tw 3d vent#personal vent#tw vent#school#academic pressure#immigrant1stgen
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I'm so disappointed in myself I've basically gained back all the weight I lost. I'm such a fat failure
But finals are almost over which means I'll be moving back home and looking for apartments for my job (I'm graduating and moving to a different state at the end of the summer for work yay!) And while I hate being at home there's not nearly as much free food shoved in my face and there's fewer people watching me eat (I live in my sorority house so it's hard to restrict and purge bc everyone is always nearby) so I'm gonna get back on my shit esp since this is about the same time last year I started losing significant weight
I also have a specific date I want to lose the weight by, it's one of my friends' grad parties, and this guy who fucked me over is probably gonna be there so I need to look good (I am in my "fuck men and ruin their lives" era) plus I want to have good habits for when I move because I will be living alone and it's basically the start of my adult life bc im done with college and school and i have to work for the rest of my life now so might as well start it off right: skinny and with good habits for staying skinny
So basically I have 63 days to get thinner, which I will start off by buying an ungodly amount of diet coke (it is on sale at shoprite)
My plan is to eat less than 1200 cal per day bc that seemed to work really well before, obviously I can go lower than that if I feel like I can but I'm risking a binge if I restrict myself to too much lower than that
Also I think I'm going to start out with a 24 hour fast and then do 16-18 hour intermittent fasts every day
I'm under 21 so once I go back home no alcohol is really easy to do (my parents don't drink and they don't want me drinking) plus I'm thinking I'm done with college now, might as well stop binge drinking so much and just drink wine and vodka sodas, (classy corporate girl vibes and less calories than cocktails, plus better for your health tbh) but that can wait till I move, so less calories ÂŻ\_( ă)_/ÂŻ
Also for exercises I want to start cycle syncing once I come off the pill (since that apparently makes it harder to loose weight, plus I'm not super good at remembering to take it so i don't think it's super effective for me anyways) so I've being doing workouts with this cycle syncing app called 28, it adjusts the intensity of your workouts based on where in your menstrual cycle you are, plus it's easier for me because I don't have to make a schedule, and then I go for a walk and just make sure I hit at least 15k steps, plus I go for a run on sundays
I'm back on my shit haha I better get skinny
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aaaaa same sentiment in regards with incoming freshie then not sure sa pinasukan na course đ„Čđđ» been there tho, but you'll do fine kasi after graduation, your course won't matter once you start looking for job, i mean it will be a great background tho pero adulting life is harder than you thought đ but anyway you still have a long way to decide pa so enjoy going to college it will be a fun experience for sure! also, don't worry about my binge reading my works, nandito lang sila yan HAHAHA gonna post rin something real soon since hinahabol ko talaga oras ko dito hsksksksks and i'm glad you're feeling better hahaha i actually saw you updated 2 days ago but i was busy so ngayon lang ako naka-dalaw, i was also hesitating to send you an ask baka nakalimutan mo na rin ako but anyway, i'm happy!! more interactions for us soon <33
ATE NO I WILL NEVER FORGET YOU HUHUHUHU core memory na nga sakin yung time you followed me back i freaked out so hard on twitter i made a whole thread about how i felt and ive held every single interaction to heart since then (to prove: i still remember when you made my ask/interaction tag emoji into your favorite flower emoji i was literally giggling the whole night and the day after cz im senti like that đ„čđ„č)
we havent talked that much even a year back but i quite literally cant get myself to forget you or every other person thats left such an impact in my life even if they dont know it
TLDR; IM A KEISY FANGIRL (pls i hope this isnt uncomfy for you i just really idolize your work huhuhu tell me if it is tho)
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Anon said: i love love love LOVE how you just draw gojo leaning onto getou, hiding his face in getou's neck or back or chest <////3 im just so heartbroken over those two
So glad to hear you like him clingy as much as I do!! TT^TT as far as Iâm concerned he wasnât clingy enough in canon, so Iâm fixing it as much as I can with every new doodle haha
Anon said: whenever im sad i just come to your account and look through your art :")) it brings me so much comfort :')) also i gotta mention that the teacher getou art you've made has healed my broken heart bc of jjk and now that is the only canon i accept thank you very much gege akutami has nothing on me
GAH GETO-SENSEI MY ONE AND ONLY Iâm happy he makes you as soft as he does me, heâs such a comfort to me ;;;; and thank you for liking my stuff!!!! Means the world to me to hear it ;A; <3
Anon said: I miss your krbk sm đ No pressure intended!!!!!! I still love and support u and ur art!!!
Man I miss them too!!!!! @ hori when are you bringing my loves back from the war Iâm here waiting good sir!!!
Anon said: v v curious on your thoughts on whatâs currently going on in bnha manga :)))
HMMM what are my thoughts on it? Well, letâs split it in two: Dekuâs side and Todorokiâs side, because thatâs how itâs split in my brain atm, and allow me to start from the second because itâs easier to get through for me
Iâm in love with everything Hori is doing with Todoroki and everyone involved with him - thatâs to say his whole whole family and Hawks and Jeanist too, all of it, Iâm so into it itâs no joke at all. Always been in love with how he handles Enjiâs character and his interactions with his family and the latest developments didnât disappoint me at all, wasnât very much into Dabi right after the ârevealâ but the more I think about it and about the story from his pov the more behind it I am, forever and always head over heels for Shoutoâs way of dealing with a situation thatâs as complex as one would expect from a protagonist of their very own story you could really make a manga out of the Todorokiâs family plot from Shoutoâs pov alone, itâs incredible I canât state how in love with it all I am enough. And Hawks, donât make me start on him Iâll straight up never stop, absolutely and most definitely my favorite pro-hero I would trust him with my money and my kids 100/10 just assume Iâm constantly crying over him. Also Jeanist is just hilarious so bless him and his presence in an otherwise too heavy story
Dekuâs side........ well, the main problems I have with it are that one, I donât really understant the need to keep ofa a secret from the class for the biggest part of the story when the reveal wasnât forced upon Deku, didnât have a huge impact on him or his relationship with the others (his leaving wasnât directly caused by him coming clean after all, he wouldnât have had to leave earlier had he not kept it a secret and he would have still left at this point had the class already known all along) and didnât, like. Matter. All that much. Two, this manga is called my hero academia and Iâm genuinely starting to wonder why. What was the point of all the arcs set inside the school anyway? Most of the characters growth (Dekuâs especially) and the progression of the main plot happened in the arcs outside of the school anyway, and at this point itâs clear weâre not going back to the school after this or even seeing anyone graduate. What of Shinsou? What was the point of his plot when weâre not even gonna see him being active part of the class in a school environment? Iâm just confused about it all, I guess. Three, which is really my biggest problem with it all, is the way Dekuâs set on saving Shigaraki. Itâs not like I donât like a story in which all the villains are saved and the good guys win and love prevails and all that, call it corny but theyâre exactly my type of stories, but Iâm not sure I can get behind it when Twice died like that, and Midnight did as well, and Aizawa lost a leg, and Nighteye died, and Hawks might have lost his wings, and Shirakumo ended up Kurogiri and itâs still unclear whether he can be saved, like... why does Shigaraki get to be saved when so many people suffered like that? And itâs not only about them suffering by his hands, itâs about Hori and how he was ruthless with so many characters but lets the story show arbitrary kindness to Shigaraki alone, itâs all... well. Unfair. The way I see it. At this point I at the very least expect kindness for Touya as well, here.
That said if I pick the chapters one by one by themselves I do enjoy them very much. I just donât gotta think about the big picture lmao AH but itâs all a personal opinion, of course! I know people who enjoy the way the story is going and I can see where theyâre coming from, this is all arbitrary tastes and preferences on my part, Iâm aware of it!
Anon said: Hi hi! I finally got into jjk AND finally caught up on the manga and i appreciate your doods soooo much more now!! Theyâre so great!! But imcurious, is there one specific moment in the story where you Gojo and Geto became IT for you? Just genuinely curious!!
THANK YOU happy to hear you liked jjk!!!! And thatâs!!! a great question, Iâm not sure I have an answer actually? I binged the manga in a day and a half, you see, and when I binge stuff that fast I rarely stop to overthink things - I did ship them as I read too since, well. Theyâre in love lmao but I shipped them in the same way I shipped itafushi or yuutoge after I read the prequel, you know? Just a general aknowledging of how good they were together. The main point with satosugu specifically was probably that satoru has been my favorite character since the beginning of the story and suguru got there as well as soon as I read their backstory, so once I was caught up theyâre the ones I ended up spending the most time thinking about, both by themselves and together, and that ended up making me a bit obsessed..... just a bit lol
If I had to give one specific moment that got me by the heart and squeezed the hardest itâd be... probably Satoruâs âmy soul knows otherwiseâ. And the way his voice alone could bring Suguru back, even for just a single moment. The thing about satosugu for me!!! one of the many things about them, but the main thing for me, is that they love each other. Be it platonic or however you wanna see it, they love each other. Despite everything and after it all, even if Satoru had to kill Suguru, even if Suguru killed so many and betrayed Satoru and they went their separate ways in the harshest of ways, they love each other. Itâs insane, isnât it? That theyâd love each other so much they could pass over everything and anything. Iâve seen the âbest friends become enemiesâ trope so often in shounen manga, but this is the first time I see it treated like this - with love so strong that they never blamed each other or turned that love in hate. The way satosugu do it is all-encompassing! It goes beyond the world and their differences and death itself! So if I had to pick itâd be that one, because that scene happens after itâs all over, and it all went to shit and way beyond too already, and still their souls resonate with each other and answer to each other and that sends me insane, just thinking about it. Like, god, they really still love each other. Satoruâs mourned for Suguru for a year, Suguruâs been dead for a year, theyâd been separated ten whole years before then, and still! And still!!! Itâs so tender I donât know how to deal with it
Anon said: âWhatâs a god to a nonbeliever?ââThat tag is going to haunt me for a while. The entire tag section for your latest Gojo and Geto drawing is meta-worthy.
THANK YOU itâd been eating at my brain I had to write it down somewhere why are those two like that
Anon said: Do you take commissions? No pressure! âšâ€ïž
Not right now!
Anon said: How do you feel about sukuna ? like/dislike or thoughts on him
AMAZING QUESTION I love him. I have absolutely zero clue as of why so donât ask me to elaborate, Iâm literally that marge pic with the potato when itâs about Sukuna, I have no meta thoughts about him nor deep reasonings behind it - by all accounts, I should dislike him! But he shows up and Iâm like nghhh king, so thatâs where we stand. Itâs Sukuna, you know. I just think heâs neat.
Anon said: sighs time to get into another fandom bc i simp too hard for ur art đ
HAH thank you for the trust I hope youâll like ror if you do get into it!!! hahaha
#fran answers#oh two of these are Long#.....#long post#in case the readmore doesn't work for whatever reason
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Avengers: College Edition
Steve: Criminal Justice and Studio Art double major. He doesn't want to torture himself with anything difficult and still wants to study what he loves. He is still an over achiever though. Highkey hates frat parties, saw someone twerking upside down and almost cried but stayed because hes the designated driver (responsible KING). prefers small get togethers with his friends. Roommates with sam and bucky!! Joins Criminal Justice club, jokingly rivals with Engineering (Tonys Club) Everyone on campus loves him including the professors, wins Homecoming king and is very happy. Sam jokingly asks to be his queen, Bucky butts in and says "NO, im his queen". Can be found in the library or art studio, usually with ink or pencil markings on his hands.
Tony: Obvi an engineering KING has physics as a minor. procrastinates to the max "No Bruce I have everything under control" *crams for 46 hours straight on a constant IV drip of Redbull and coffee* Super smart and helps draw the blueprint for the new engineering building. Roomies with Bruce! Tony was in a frat for a bit his freshmen year but hated it and wanted real friends (Throws better parties anyway) met Bruce and all the other avengers during a 1301 intro class. Pulls women like no tomorrow. On the presidents list every semester and tutors math for free on the side. He is basically the Dad in STEM. Tries hitting on Natasha but she is just like :/ nah, when her and bruce start dating tony is surprised because bruce is his "quiet little cinnamon roll." Tony constantly teases bruce and is like "yall fuckin (;" Steve butts in "tONY PLZ I JUST WANT TO WATCH THIS MOVIE" Bruce is thankful for steves intervention. You know how he rivals Steves Criminal Justice club? He butts heads with Business Clubs leader (Pepper) until everyone catches them together at a party. Has a caffeine addiction. Works out with Thor and Bucky one day in the rec and almost dies.
Bruce: Physics and Engineering double major (Hardworking KING) In math club with Vision and Wanda. He loves being roomies with Tony because it helps him out of his shell. Likes to draw with Steve sometimes and enjoys the quiet. Doesn't procrastinate and gets things done in a timely manor. 4.0 icon we all strive to be. Him and Nat already know each other, but bond and get a lot closer while studying in the library and they eventually start dating. He takes her coffee when she works across campus and is always almost late to class because of that (He doesn't care though bc thats his BABY) "Um.. Bruce your class is in 5 minutes" "Okay and?.....Wait I have an ex-" *Sprints to his building* Takes boxing at night with Thor, Bucky, Sam and Steve!!! Loves sparring with Thor and can surprisingly take the big buy on pretty well. Gets his butt kicked by Natasha in a MMA class though.
Natasha: Majors in Criminal Justice and Minors in Psychology. Ballet club AND MOCK TRIAL!! Has a Job at the Criminal Justice Deans office and takes MMA classes on the side. She is on Mock Trial with Loki and they actually get along quiet well once they stop butting heads about the case. Introduces Sam and Wanda to dance and they have so much fun. Coffee dates with Bruce!! Her and Steve become RAs in the following years and are the coolest RAs you know. Prefers night classes, Bruce walks her to all of them. Psychology classes are her favorite and really wants to help children one day. Volunteers at a daycare during breaks. Sis can really out drink Tony and Thor. Puts Wanda under her wing and helps her with fafsa and what not. Her and Bucky get the Russian language credit by simply testing out. Has her sh!t together and while she has a lot on her plate she can take it. She is really the Mom of the group. Can be found dancing or with Bruce. Her and Clint are icons in psychology classes.
Clint: Deaf Studies with education minor! (we stan deaf clint in the comics) In the Archery club and wins nationals for the Uni. Loves to draw with Steve. Helps Bruce ask Natasha out! PRANK ICON! loves to do prank wars with tony, bucky, loki and sam. Was in the same frat with Tony but hated it as well. While he seems to have a more reserved demeanor he is still the life of the party. (Like he knows people at the clubs ya know?) Can get in anywhere and helps everyone rent out a club for the night in celebration of midterms being over. Loves reading in the library and loves morning classes and being productive early in the day. Cracks Tonys netflix and hulu passwords (no tony... tonyr0cks69 is not good enough) Wants to teach at a school for the Deaf. Bruce sets him up with a girl from engineering and that is his future wife.
Thor: Physical Education major and Communications minor! Here on a football scholarship and is in a frat (not the asshole one tony was in) and is a partying ICON. Tries to get Loki to party but Loki just wants to drink wine with the cat he snuck into his dorm. Learns Sign from Clint to prepare for his career in education. Loves working out with Bucky, Sam and Steve. Takes up boxing during football off season and spars with Bruce. Despite being everyones fav himbo he gets really good grades and is a very good writer. Loki dorms across the hall from him. Thor actually rooms with Peter. Peter is the freshman baby and Thor takes peter under his wing and introduces him to everyone and helps him with college stuff in general. Also hooks him up with MJ and brings him to the occasional boxing session. Has a loud booming laughter you can hear in all floors of the library when he sees a funny meme. One time he actually makes a very good point and notices a flaw in one of Tony and Bruces projects leaves everyone stunned. Picks on Loki in big brother fashion. Unironically calls weed the devils lettuce.
Loki: Pre-Law and Criminal Justice. LOVES to argue. (Devils advocate ass) In Mock Trial and Criminal Justice Club. Tony jokingly calls him steves sexy secretary in CJ club. Loves Mock Trial and is the president with Nat as his right hand woman. Sneaks a cat he found at the shelter into his dorm and names it muffin. Stays in the Library writing or going over cases. The one time he was taking Natasha a copy of the Mock Trial case packet and caught her and bruce smooching. (He screeched) "Haha funny joke yall heres the case packet BYE." He automatically texts the group chat "i think nAT AND BRUCE HAVE SOME TEA FOR US HMM". Lets Peter and Bruce come over to his dorm because he knows their roommates can get a little too much sometimes. Loki also becomes an avid twitter user and thats how he gains popularity on campus. (He called the uni out for their awful and expensive parking) Was able to convince the Dean with tony and steve to create a new parking lot. Caffeine addict!!! Him and Tony always bump into each other at the coffee shop. Brings baked goods to meet ups with the gang. Loves to play pranks (especially on Tony) Him and Bucky come up with a genius prank on him and even get pepper involved. Best dressed on campus and is in the fashion club. He is the embodiment of dark academia.
Sam: Criminal Justice Major with Aerospace Engineering minor. Gets introduced to Bucky and Steve during move in and they literally become brothers. Is both in Criminal Justice Club and Engineering Club. In the Historically Black Frat on campus and takes huge pride in that. Parties with tony and thor BIG TIME. Procrastinates by throwing paper airplanes at Bucky until Bucky is like "Um...dude your paper is due in like two hours." At that moment Sam got into work faster than he ever had. Loves gossip sessions with Loki and Wanda. Works out a lot with Bucky, Steve and Thor to get rid of stress. When he and Bucky finish a final they go to loki's dorm and ask "Hey can we see your cat." Helps prep food for friends-giving and decorates the dorm for holidays. HATES 8ams so so so much. Steve promises him pancakes if he gets up and goes. Binge watches shows during weekends and screams when Destiel is finally canon. Loves running and gets a Track Scholarship when Thor gets him to join a sport. Gets Peter to join track.
Bucky: criminal justice major and psychology minor. Buck is also in ballet club with Nat, it really helps him relax and gives him a free space to think (also he runs that shit like no ones business) Criminal justice club as well and LOVES to work out and box. One time Sam accompanies him to ballet and Bucky pushes Sam into a split... the scream was heard for miles. "Sam ballet is good for athletes it helps w-" "Yeah but its not good for my balls" Doesn't willingly procrastinate but once in awhile he will forget an assignment, you best believe his eyes will snap open from his nap and get to work asap. For one of his psyche labs he had to question Steve as if he were Steve's therapist to which Steve responds "Hey bro you dont have to hit a nerve that deep" He also likes to do dance with peter since it helps him get away from Thor for a bit. Not a big partier but once the weight of finals are off his chest you best believe he will go all out. Picks on Nat and says hes gonna steal her man, to which tony interjects and says "Not if I do first" Bucky also has a very comfy dorm, comfy lighting and tons of pillows, the man loves his sleep... and so does everyone else. Sometimes he finds peter, sam, THOR, tONY EVERYONE just napping in his bed before their study time. Overall, bucky is a smart boy and his time in college is kind to him.
Wanda: English Major and Education Minor. After being an orphan Wanda knows what it feels like to not have a parental figure there and she wants to change that for other kids by becoming an english teacher. She volunteers at an orphanage, specifically the one her and pietro were in for a brief moment when they came to the states. She loves to draw as well and takes plenty of art classes with steve. She paints a portrait of the entire gang and gives it to tony as a graduation present (he cried). She loves to do volunteer work for children and also spend a lot of time in the library, She helped Nat calm down before Bruce asked her out. Her and Loki are in constant competition for best dressed. "Loki ill let you win best dressed but you have to let me see your cat" "ugh fine... btw your shirt doesnt match your boots" "hEY" Her and Peter take alot of intro classes together and are constantly running around craft stores trying to get the right stuff for projects. Visits Vision at his Job on Campus and he visits her where she volunteers and eventually they start dating. She is constantly getting visited by pietro at 4am asking "Um do you have milk" "Pietro its 4am what do you ne-" "my OREOS"
Pietro: Track star business major, frat ICON with Thor. poor boy is STRESSED he hates college and is here on a track scholarship, constantly late and running around getting shit done. Queen of late assignments but still gets them graded because he is in Track. Yeah he has alot on his plate but he still parties with thor for hours. When he is drowning in assignments Clint is always there to help him, Bruce also helps him with biology and the more science-y classes. Likes to mess around and race sam at track practice. Not into coffee but will run on all the monster energy drinks you could possibly buy. Seriously is tired of 8 a.m courses, he just wants to nap after practice. Walks into the study room that everyone was in and actually looks more sleep deprived than tony. He gets a lot of tips from steve on how to have an easier time in college and it really helps him.
Vision: Grad student working on a civil engineering masters and a TA. Meets Wanda in the library and she asks him where the biographies are. He mistakenly says they are on the 2nd floor "Uh theyre actually on the third" "Then why did you ask?" "Cause I wanted to talk to you :)" He swooned. Through Wanda he met Tony and Bruce and became their best friend, He helped out a lot with engineering club and got them far. He spends a lot of time doing research for his masters degree, he loves relaxing with the group on weekends and picks on pietro as if he is already apart of the family. Him and Loki bond over intellectual conversations from time to time. Bruce and Nat go on double dates with him and Wanda. Went to a bar once with tony and bruce and had to stop tony from singing Queens entire discography, he had the best night that night. Helps everyone with getting into jobs and into grad school in general while everyone helps him let loose and have some fun.
Peter: Peter is a Physics major and eventually works his way up to biochemistry. (hardworking icon) He is the freshman baby of the group and is introduced to them through Thor. He dances with Buck and Nat sometimes as well. Tony obviously takes peter under his wing and helps him with assignments. One time everyone was in the same study room and him and pietro have a redbull shot gunning challenge. When Peter wins Thor picks him up and almost yeets the poor boy into the ceiling. "VERY WELL DONE YOUNG PARKER YOU SHOULD BE DOING THAT WITH BEER IN NO TIME." "Thor plz" Tony and Thor help him ask MJ out and even spy on them during a dinner date. (Imagine thor with sunglasses and a scarf around his head pretending to be tonys date) He feels so accepted in college because of the gang and gets all his work done on time. Goes out of his way to get everyone christmas presents and is so excited for friendsgiving. Becomes a little stressball during finals and midterms and stays in the library till it closes. He spots loki alot in there and helps loki with science classes while loki helps him with political science classes. He meets MJ through wanda and is obviously blushing the whole time while being introduced. Gets embarrassed when the guys flirt with aunt may. "guys plz stop" This is when Sam earns his "milf hunter" nickname. "Pete hows your aunt?" "She doesnt want you sam i-" its not like that... actually it is like that"
Coulson: Alumni Icon. Is the gangs Intro professor and is the reason why everyone meets eachother. (the class was chaotic indeed) Coulson loved that class so much and he still gets visited by everyone from time to time. He is obviously close with Nick. They were there that night when Tony was signing Queen at the bar and couldnt help but laugh.
Nick Fury: Dean for criminal justice and is heavily involved with criminal justice club and mock trial. He is tired of everyones shit as always. Makes a tiktok account for the criminal justice club and has no idea how to manage social media so gets Loki to help. Has to delete it when Loki commented "hah losers" on the engineering tiktoks page. He looks intimidating but in his office he has a picture with the club and has all the gifts he gets on display. (He even framed lokis comment because it was hilarious afterall)
#Avengers#Avengers crack#avengers au#marvel#marvel au#avengers college au#Steve Rogers#steve x reader#Bucky Barnes#bucky x reader#wanda maximoff#natasha romanov#bruce x natasha#bruce banner#The Avengers#Loki Laufeyson#loki incorrect quotes#loki x reader#avengers incorrect quotes#pietro maximoff#peter parker#peter parker x reader#peter parker x you#Thor Odinson#thor x reader#tony stark#iron man#sam wilson#sam wilson x reader#avengers memes
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Ooh congrats on 200 girl!! Can I request something with Rafe please where he slowly falls in love with the reader every time she comes round to tutor Wheezie but she's not interested because of what she's seen and heard about him (non cannon Rafe pls, him just being a rich stuck up dick) so he puts in the effort to win her over and is determined to show her a different side to him!?
Sorry,this sucks lol.
Rafe Cameron,the bitchy,rich,straight white male.He was privileged as all hell and could get away with anything because of his daddyâs money.He did get away with anything,including beating the living hell out of multiple pogues.He was probably the person you hated most in the world and yet you were in his house,being payed with his daddyâs money to tutor his younger sister.You tried not to judge people based on their families but part of you wanted to decline the offer to tutor Wheezie and spit in Ward Cameronâs face.
But of course thats not what happened,you needed money to live and Ward had offered a ridiculous amount.It was your third study session,common core math books and Type Two Writing for Students opened on the table,piles of flashcards and worksheets flooding the marble.
Wheezie needed to go to the bathroom,meaning you were all alone when Rafe came along.Your fingers tightened around your pencil as you went through Wheezieâs first draft,wanting nothing more than to pierce the boys eyeball with the charcoal tip.He stared at you from across the kitchen,looking around with a confused expression. âWhat the fuck?âHe asked.You rolled your eyes,ignoring him. âWho are you and why are you in my house?âHe asked,his voice dripping with venom.Wheezie came out of the bathroom,glancing between the two of you. âShes my tutor,chill.âShe sighed,sitting across from you again.The boy glared at you,trying to hide his wonder.
He didnt really know who you were but he was sure he had seen you somewhere.His eyes were focused on your face,trying to figure out if he had seen you at a party or something. âWhat?âYou asked,he shrugged,leaning against the counter and still staring at you.Then it clicked.
He had shown up to a boneyard party,just to be a fucking asshole.He had seen a girl hanging upside down from a tree,talking to JJ Maybank.He could see why he was interested in her,she looked pretty cute,arms crossed over her chest as she swung back and forth.He had always wondered who she was and why he had never seen her before.He thought about her every once in a while,trying to think of why he never saw her again.And here she was,sitting in his kitchen. âYouâre a pogue?âHe asked,squeezing his cup.You ignored him,tapping your pencil on a word and asking Wheezie what it said.Â
âHey,i asked you a question.âHe was closer this time,leaning against the table. âAnd I ignored you.âYou answered,sending a glare his way.He chuckled,shaking his head. âAre you a pogue or not?âHe asked.You sighed,looking his way. âDoes it matter?Im trying to do my job and youâre being a pest,do you want Wheezie to fail all of her classes?âYou asked.He rolled his eyes. âOh,so you are a Pogue.What does a pogue know that I dont?âHe asked Wheezie.You laughed,shaking your head. âWe all know you only graduated because of your daddyâs money.You had like...what?A 2.0 gpa?âYou teased,gripping your pencil tight.He bit on his lip staring down at you. âOh,so whatâs yours then?âHe asked,watching as a smirk came across your face. â4.2,now fuck off.âYou growled at him.
Something about the way you told him off completely freaked him out.Most people knew better,especially when they were in his house.He had a habit of sitting on the couch and watching you as you corrected Wheezieâs essays,telling her which words would be better for getting her message across.You would shoot him glares that made his heart beat quicken,making him nervous.Other times heâd see you smile at Wheezieâs progress,his heart beat quickening but for a different reason.As Wheezie put it,he was completely in love with you.He couldnt agree more but didnt want to admit it.He hadnt even talked to you since the first time he saw you.It wasnt until you were packing up your bag and dropped papers that he talked to you again.He had rushed to help you pick them up,handing them to you.
You thanked him quietly,rushing past him.He followed you to the door,working up his courage to talk. âSo um...do you have a criminal record?âHe asked.You turned,rasing your eyebrows. âOh,so because im a pogue I have a criminal record?âYou asked.He shook his head,mumbling. âNo,no not what im saying at all im just trying to make conversation and likeâŠ.i dont know i just thought it would be a cool question.âHe played with his hands,following you outside. âI mean,yeah,I do.I wouldve fuckin gotten away with it too if I was a kook.âYou sighed.He laughed nervously,hands shaking a little. âSo...what did you do?âHe asked.You grinned at the memory. âVandalism,I used to go around and steal confederate flags and then paint rainbows on their houses.âYou answered.He chuckled,nodding.
 âSo what did you do with them?The flags,I mean.âhe tried to continue the conversation,following you down the driveway. âBurned them.âYou answered,turning to look at him again. âAre you gonna follow me home,stalker?âYou asked.He blushed,shaking his head. âUm...no,unless you want me too.âHe offered.You shook your head,continuing your walk as he just stared at you,jumping up and down,joy washing over him now that he had talked to you without you looking disgusted.He had asked Wheezie to talk to you for him,making her confused. âTalk to her yourself.âShe scrolled through her phone.He shook his head. âNo,no she hates me I just need you to ask her about like...if shes single,what zodiac sign she likes,what she looks for in a guy.You know what i'm saying?âHe asked.She smirked. âYou like her!âShe exclaimed.He shook his head. âNo,im asking for a friend.Please just do this for me,okay?âHe asked.She grinned. âSo what do I get out of it?I could really go for McDonalds.âShe grinned.
âSo...what do you think about Zodiac signs?âShe asked,writing down some dialogue ideas.You raised your eyebrows. âwhat?âYou asked.She laughed,repeating herself. âWhy are you asking?âYou asked.She glanced over to Rafe in the living room,the boy twirling his fingers and encouraging her to keep asking questions. âI just think its important that I know.âShe mentally face palmed herself. âOk,Scorpios are superior and Virgos suck ass.âYou answered.Rafeâs eyes widened.You had to have known that she was asking for him.You wouldnt have said that if you didnt know he was a virgo. âOkâŠ.what about your ideal first date?âShe asked.You laughed,shaking your head. âKeep working on your dialogue.âYou told her.
Rafe tried.He really tried so hard.He knew that it was the fact that he was a kook that made you hate him so much.He tried to act more humble,less cocky and tried working on his manners.He went through Wheezieâs instagram followers to find you,cursing when he saw that your account was private. âWheezie,let me see your phone.âHe sighed nervously. âWhy?âShe asked. âI need to see (Y/N)âs instagram.âHe explained,scrolling through your page.You posted pictures of sunsets,your dog and a couple of photos of you holding up peace signs and middle fingers.Your bio made him chuckle. âFuck the patriarchy and fuck you too.âHe went through who you followed,seeing a lot of fanpages and the official Harry Potter account.
That lead him to binge watch the Harry Potter movies,take the sorting hat quiz and order a Slytherin shirt.He purposely wore it when he knew you were coming over,walking into the kitchen.Your eyes fell onto his shirt,laughing. âOh,of course youâre a slytherin.âYou sighed.He grinned. âWow,thanks.What house are you in?âHe asked.He held a long conversation with you as you talked about how much you hate J.K Rowling and how Dobby didnt deserve what happened.He agreed with everything you said,loving the way your eyes lit up.The study session somehow turned into you and Rafe speaking about Draco while Wheezie grinned to herself.
He looked through every single post of yours,every single caption until he learned that you loved horror films.He learned your favorite one,putting it on when you came over.Wheezie didnt even need tutoring anymore,she just liked having you over and you still got payed.You had then become her babysitter because Rafe was deemed to irresponsible and Sarah had a social life. âDude,are you watching (Y/F/H/M)?âYou asked,hearing the dialogue.He nodded,letting you sit next to him to watch it. âI didnt know you liked horror movies.âYou sighed,leaning back on the couch.He blushed. âOnly this one.âHe answered.
It took him three months of talking to you about Harry Potter and horror films for you to stop telling him off,cussing him out and giving him glares.He could feel himself falling for you more,seeing who you were when you werent angry or annoyed.He avoided The Cut,learning that maybe if he let go of his Pogue Beater reputation youâd eventually like him.He tried to be more open,to tell you about himself and have deep conversations with you.He answered your questions honestly,laying his trauma and issues bare and letting you ask questions about the worst sides of his life.He had cried in your arms a couple of times,becoming your friend.He had gotten buried deep in the Friend Zone but he was fine with that,knowing you didnt hate him anymore.You two would hang out all the time outside of babysitting Wheezie,heâd come down to the beach with you to have splash fights.
One night while you were at the beach,the area completely empty besides the two of you as you splashed cold water at eachother.He had pushed you into the water,your clothes,hair and skin becoming soaked.You jumped up,hugging him tight and getting him soaked too.He pulled away,grinning down at you.He didnt know why he thought it was a good idea,leaning down and kissing you.All the three months of feelings spilled out just then,his hands holding your waist tight.You didnt knew what to do,what to think,pulling away. âUmâŠ.so you just-what?âYou huffed,trying to understand.His bottom lip trembled,his hands shaking. âI justâŠ.I dont know.âHe mumbled,still holding you.You nodded,finger tracing his jaw. âSo you dont know why you did that?âYou asked.He looked out at the ocean,biting his lip. âCause I like you...love you and I just thoughtâŠ.âHe mumbled,trying to form words.You rolled your eyes,pulling him into another kiss. âAsshole.âYou grinned,running a hand through his hair.
@sexytholland @28cnn  @popcrone818 @fttayla @cherryobx @n1ghtsh4d3-67 @drewstarkeyobx @poguestyleskye @judayyyw @jjtheangel
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name is dandi (short for dandelion)Â
22
he/him (ftm, on T)Â
on again off again relationship with ednos since middle school; notorious binge eater; clinically obese stonerÂ
pro recovery for everyone but me haha --- pls just block, donât report, u know im just gonna make a new account
5âČ1Â
cw 241lbs / hw 249
gw 225
(placeholder milestone)
gw 200Â
(hitting 200 was the worst day of my life)Â
gw 170Â
(my weight before a medication made me gain a shit ton at once)
gw 155Â
(moving out of obese bmi and into overweight - my weight when i graduated hs)Â
gw 130Â
(moving out of overweight bmi into normal bmi, Iâve never been at a normal bmi)Â
gw 100Â
(i cant even imagine seeing so many zeros without a 2 in front)Â
ugw 90Â
(underweight but barely, an appropriate weight for being so short)Â
#annarexx#miiaaa#buliima#anorekic#anorektyczki#anorexja#anorekcia#proannnnna#promiia#anamia#ana#mia#proana#promia#not pro just using tags#idk what the tags are these days sorry#thinnblr#thinspi#thinspii#male thinspi#thinspr0
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Do you have any fic recs? Iâm on a bkdk binge after reading your fic!
HO HOÂ STRAP IN ANON AND GET READY ITS GONNA BE A LONG ONE (also oergiemgremgi idk which fic you read but im happy you read it thank you sm~)Â
Okay so first, im gonna get some one-shots out of the way---yes, theyâre all Explicit. these are only a few out of the gold that is bkdk one-shots out there. thereâs lots of good unpublished threads on twitter, too.Â
Not So Common Ground:Â Â ABO-verse, dekuâs a serial killer omega. he meets bakugou alpha and finds out they got some secrets in common. hot. thats all i gotta say.Â
Revenge, And a Little More: Dekuâs a succubus. you can figure out where it goes from there. I thought his personality was adorable though???Â
On the Edge: okay, so this is smut but with feelings. itâs short, simple, but written so....like, the tone is so soft all around??? like what our two idiots could be once theyâve graduated and have calmed down and just---spoke with action and little words??? idk but itâs a good one-shot that hits my kinks so--Â
Itâs Gonna Take a Superman To Sweep Me Off My Feet: this is just. im ngl itâs just kinky ok? the tears, the verbal stuff--sheesh. well written. Â
whatever youâve done, just bury it so this isnât a one-shot, but itâs a short 3 chapters so im gonna put it here. abo verse again, deku and kacchan had broken up, but yknow. things are complicated. katsuki lost his quirk. its complicated. ends with a happy note though~Â
mistakes: maaaannnn look. i like the simple things ok? after-party s*xytimes? bratty deku? bakugou swears a lot? a fwb vibe? it doesnât have to be super explicit if itâs got all that.Â
okay, now letâs move on to some longer fics. most are in progress, but theyâve all been updating regularly!Â
Swap it out:  not rated. in progress. bakugou and deku switch personalities on a dare and have to behave like each other to the whole class. Feelings slowly start ensuing. Itâs super cute!!!! has itâs funny moments, especially after you get past the first chapter. katsuki is adorable as he starts crushing on deku!!! aaaaaa!!!!!Â
boy meets evil: Explicit. in progress mind the tags basically, bakugou is the son of lucifer and attends an all boyâs catholic school where he meets guilt-ridden shame-filled deku. i really just wanna hug deku. i think it shows a lot of promise so far--promise of what? im not sure, but its there and has my interest.Â
Night Out: Explicit. in progress ABOverse, dekuâs a stripper. bakugou is SUPER into it. i only read the first two chapters but i love the author so the rest is probably legit????Â
Howl: Explicit. in progress itâs only 2 chapters in, and itâs been a couple months since its updated, but the author expressed wanting to continue so i imagine its not abandoned! ABOverse again, i like the characterizations a LOOOTTT. college au as well, looks like thereâs room for some pining so HNNNGGGÂ
glacier: Explicit. in progress but close to the end. MIND. THE. TAGS. I cannot stress that enough i personally donât, yk, get off on reading smut anyway, im usually in it for the giggles. so for me reading this with those tags, its less about the ....âsmutâ and more about the writing and characterizations. bakugou is unhinged and provides an exciting and suspenseful read, like an antagonist you hate to love, and deku is out here suRVIVING by any means necessary. its all about the suspense dude. its has me on my toes most chapters. tbh i cant decide how i want it to end but i can tell the author knows how its going to do so, and i cant wait to see how it plays out.Â
Vicious. Explicit. Complete. iâve...never read it actually. but uh. sounds interesting i think. fake marriage. theyâre hero partners. joins a cult and....stuff happens.Â
The Night We Met. Mature. Complete. look. this is soooo well written. the author wanted to make it seem like poetry, and i think they succeeded in doing so. but pleASE understand that this is heavy af. i will never likely, read this again because of how damn HEAVY this was, at least for me. itâs almost triggering to my anxiety?? and i donât even have. like. serious anxiety??? it has a happy ending though!!! bakugou canât die, and deku is reincarnated and bound to met him in every life.Â
Iâm Friends with the Monster in my Closet:Â Mature. In progress. havenât read it yet!!! but apparently deku is out here being non-human and creepy and heâs bakuâs bff!!! halloween is just around the corner, so why not dive into something spooky like this???Â
Quiet Rapture: Explicit. In progress. ill always rec this classic ABOverse fic. well-written. well characterized. deku isnât your average omega (thats the shit i like if you couldnât tell) baku is smitten. i stopped reading about....14 chapters in?? but i imagine itâs still going strong.Â
Persephone: Teen. Complete. super cute. baku and deku grow up as best friends then become more. they also grow up with shinsou and he gets a lot of attention and love in this fic too, so if youâre a shinsou stan, here you go! deku has a quirk as well! his dad is written suuuperrr well and lovable. bakugou and deku are oblivious and adorable and just. this fic gives me the fuzzies. only 7 chapters but theyâre LOOOONNNNGG.Â
these are all mostly from my bookmarks. i have some others, but this has gotten long enough as it is. i love being asked for recs though, so donât be afraid to send me some or ask me for some!!!!Â
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 * đđœđ¶đđ  đčđ¶đđđđ  đđžÂ * đđđ  đđđđâđ  đđ  đ  đđđđ  ! iâm late to the party but i was tryna be ~aesthetic~ & get my tags nice ! which is kinda . . . lame but oh well ! iâm ready to plot up in this bitch ! i just love the concept of this plot , like iâm the biggest reality tv show hoe ! iâm lit binging too hot to handle rn cause how can u not ? anywayth , this here is my baby love novita aka nova ur rags to riches storyline ! i want all the plots i can get & if u wanna plot smash that lil đ€ button ! i can hit u up on tumblr ims . . . but in all honesty tumblr ims suck so hit ya girl up on dickcord @  đđđ'𥠠đđ  đđđđđđđđđđ#4904 that way i can constantly annoy u !
 thereâs đ«đŹđłđŠđ±đ  đ°đąđŻđŻđđ«đŹÂ ! though on their socials they go by @supernova . i heard she is originally from đđđđđđđđđđ  đđđđđđ  đđđđ  đđđđ  ,  đđđđđđ
đ , but made the big move to los angeles to join TWENTIES . you havenât heard about it ? well , apparently their dream is to đđđ  đđ  đ  đđđđđ  đ
đđđđđđđ
 đđ  đđđđđđđ  đđđđđđđđđ , but they have no chance unless they quit being so đąđ€đŹđ±đŠđ°đ±đŠđ  & đ°đ¶đđđŻđŠđ±đŠđ  . that said , those behind the scenes have said they can be đŁđąđŻđłđąđ«đ±Â & đĄđŻđŠđłđąđ«Â too . guess weâll have to watch and find out ! â & pink highlighted scripts scattered on the kitchen table , lacy lingerie peeking out of clothing & love letters tucked away in a hat box on a closet shelf .
TW : drugs Â
* . â  đđđđđđđđđđ .  â
đ«đđȘđą  âș  novita grace serrano đ«đŠđ đšđ«đđȘđą  âș nova , novs & serrano đđ€đą  âș  twenty one years  old đĄđđ±đą  đŹđŁ  đđŠđŻđ±đ„  âș february 29th , 1999 đ·đŹđĄđŠđđ  đ°đŠđ€đ«  âș aquarius sun , moon & rising đ đČđŻđŻđąđ«đ±  đŻđąđ°đŠđĄđąđ«đ đą  âș  los angeles  ,  california đ„đŹđȘđąđ±đŹđŽđ«  âș  plantation  mobile  home  park  ,  florida đ«đđ±đŠđŹđ«đđ©đŠđ±đ¶  âș  american đŹđ đ đČđđđ±đŠđŹđ«  âș  actress  &  model đđ đ±đŠđ«đ€  đ đ©đđŠđȘ  âș  zoey  deutch đȘđŹđĄđąđ©đŠđ«đ€  đ đ©đđŠđȘ  âș  kaia gerber đ€đąđ«đĄđąđŻ  &  đđŻđŹđ«đŹđČđ«đ°  âș  cisfemale  &  she  /  her đŹđŻđŠđąđ«đ±đđ±đŠđŹđ«Â âș  pansexual  &  panromantic đ©đđđąđ©đ°  âș  the  coquette  ,  the  babydoll  &  the  sybarite
* . â  đđđđđđđđđđ  .  â
pink  highlighted  scripts  scattered  on  the  kitchen  table  ,  an  intense  coffee  addiction  ,  lacy  lingerie  peeking  out  of  clothing  ,  strappy  high  heels  ,  floral  perfumes  with  sweet  notes  ,  love  letters  tucked  away  in  a  hat  box  tucked  on  a  closet  shelf  ,  black  lingerie  for  special  occasions  ,  glossy  lips  constantly  ,  pink  champagne  ,  sweet  breakfast  foods  ,  freshly  manicured  nails Â
* . â  đđđđđđđđđđ
 .  â
valentina & matteo met at a typical high school party , valentina the girl from a strict & religious household , matteo the dirtbag left to his own devices Â
the two had a whirlwind romance , getting high off each other & off of crack , the drug of choice that matteo introduced valentina to
after only six months , valentina & matteo were addicted , not only to their toxic relationship but to the crack , all  at the mere age of 15  & 18
their highs & carelessness led to valentina getting pregnant , when the two found out that she was pregnant they ran away Â
they both came from very strict households & this was their way out , something they always talked about in bed Â
they only went about four hours away from home , landing in plantation mobile home park florida Â
soon after getting the cheapest & most run down trailer matteo fledÂ
he  left to  find  the  next  needle  to  stick  in  his  arm without the financial & emotional burden of being a father
thus , novita was  born  to  an addict teenaged  single  mom  in  a  trailer  park
so  valentina  was  left  without  her  family  ,  alone  to  raise  a  baby  at  the  age  of  sixteen  all  the  while  trying  to  stay  sober  for  the  baby  that  changed  her  life  ,  thankfully  she  was  able  to  get  a  job  but  there  were  a  few  times  where  she  almost  lost  it  because  she  slipped Â
her  mother  ,  valentina  ,  was  a  waitress  at  a  diner  making  minimum  wage
since valentina was a single parent that would work as much as she could nova had to be taken care of by someone else , she was  watched  by  a  older  woman  who  she  called  kitty  who  had  lived  in  the  trailer  park  since  she  was  born
when  she  did  slip  kitty  watched  nova  ,  she  actually  had  a  small room  just  for  the  girl  when  valentina  was  either  working  late  or  disappeared  for  a  little  bit
because  of  her  motherâs  job  &  her  craving  for  a  high  there  wasnât  a  whole  lot  of  money  for  the  two  of  them
nova grew  up  fairly  poor  life  &  she  always  fantasized  about  her  mother  getting  swept  off  her  feet  by  a  rich  ,  handsome  doctor  or  lawyer  ,  a  fantasy  that  valentina  shared  but never voiced
when  nova was  seven  she  was  at  the  mall  with  kitty  ,  while  her  mom  was  at  work  ,  they  were  approached  by  a  talent  company  who  thought  nova would  make  a  great  child  actress  or  model Â
kitty  knowing  that  valentina  &  nova needed  the  money  ,  signed nova up
at  first  valentina  was  less  than  happy  about  her  child  being  an  actress  or  model  because  of  how  it  would  interfere  with  her  job  &  novaâs schooling
but  when  she  heard  how  much  nova could  make  in  just  one  day  &  with  kitty  offering  to  help  by  taking  her  to  auditions  &  jobs  she allowed  nova to  start  her  career
novaâs first  job  was  a  commercial  for  barbies  ,  something  that  nova will  always  remember
the  beginning  of  her  career  was  a  slow  start  ,  making  valentina reconsider  having  nova being  in  the  business  a  handful  of  times  ,  but  each  time  valentina  had  doubts  ,  kitty  helped  reassure  her
when  nova turned  twelve  she  got  her  biggest  role ,  a  reoccurring  role  in  a  soap  opera  as  a  daughter  of  a  main  character
she  continued  that  role  up  until  she  was  fifteen  ,  by  the  time  she  hit  fifteen  school  was  really  put  on  the  back  burner  in  novaâs eyes
instead  of  being  concerned  with  pep  rallies  &  dances  ,  she  was  more  bothered  with  finding  what  her  next  role  or  photoshoot  would  be
finally  at  sixteen  ,  after  a  lot  of  pestering  on  novaâs part  ,  valentina  let  nova quit  school  & instead  get  her  ged
once  she  had  her  ged  &  didnât  need  to  attend  school  she  had  a  lot  more  time  on  her  hands  ,  giving  her  more  opportunities  to  work  jobs
this  is  when  her  career  really  started  taking  off  ,  she  was  booking  more  modeling  gigs  , which  had  her  traveling  &  living  the  model  lifestyle
the  traveling  made  her  long  for  a  better  life  ,  seeing  where  elite  models  &  talented  actresses  could  go  if  they  worked  hard  enough
this  is  what  drove  nova  ,  she  saved  &  saved  &  saved  ,  instead  of  telling  valentina  she  was  making  more  money  she  tucked  away  the  difference  so  that  she  would  be  able  to  make  her  way  to  la  when  she  turned  eighteen
the  summer  that  her  high  school  friends  graduated  &  nova was  about  to  turn  eighteen  ,  she  moved  across  the  country  to  la  with  a  high school  friend  (  wanted  connection  mayhaps  ) they  got  a  run  down  apartment  with  all  of  the  money  they  both  had  saved  up
thanks  to  nova moving  to  la  she  was  able  to  get  better  roles  &  more  impressive  gigs
iâm  using  zoey  deutch  as  her  acting  claim  so  iâm  gonna  say  that  her  first  big  role  was  as  shadia  in  dirty  grandpa  when  she  was  eighteen
then  she  slowly  began  getting  more  movie  roles  like  everybody  wants  some  !!  , good  kids  , why  him  ,  &  before  i  fall
sheâs still not nearly where she would like to be career wise , but sheâs making her way towards stardom
when her agent told her about the casting call for twenties , nova was apprehensive , she didnât want to be seen as a reality tv star like paris hilton or lauren conrad , she wanted to make a name for herself as an actress
but novaâs agent convinced her that twenties would get her more recognition & show how hard sheâs working on her craft & that was all it took for nova to say yes to the audition
she didnât have high hopes for the show & didnât even plan on being cast , but when she got the call she realized how eager she actually was to be apart of twenties Â
* . â  đđđđđđđđđđđ  .  â
đŁđđłđŹđŻđđđ©đą  âș  fervent  ,  driven  ,  confident  ,  charismatic  &  independent đČđ«đŁđđłđŹđŻđđđ©đą  âș  egotistic  ,  sybaritic  ,  guileful  ,  critical  &  histrionic đȘđČđ°đą  đŠđ«đ°đ𬠠âș  buffy  summers  ,  jennifer  check  ,  lorelai  gilmore  ,  robin scherbatsky  ,  lucille  bluth  , margaery  tyrell  ,  jackie  burkhart  &  kathryn merteuil
given  her  history  ,  nova has  grown  up  to  be  a  very  driven  &  motivated  girl Â
she  takes  her  work  very  seriously  because  she  never  wants  to  end  up  like  her  mother  or  back  in  a  trailer  park
nova learned  from  a  young  age  that  being  charismatic  &  flirtatious  made  you  stand  out  in  a  crowd  of  girls  the  look  the  same  as  you  &  want  the  same  things  as  you
she  uses  her  sexuality  to  her advantage  &  sheâs  a  huge  feminist  that  promotes  women  making  choices  about  their  bodies  for  themselves
novs is  all  about  the  girl  friendships  &  is  loyal  to  a  fault  ,  if  her  best  friend  told  her  that  her  boyfriend  broke  up  with  her  nova would  be  on  his  ass  in  an  instant
despite  her  loyalty  i  donât  really  see nova making  lots  of  close  friends  easily , once  they  are  close  sheâs  extremely  open  but  opening  up  is  hard  for  her  to  do
she  also  likes  to  party  sheâs  very  much  into  the  lavish  lifestyle  ,  wanting  to  milk  it  for  all  itâs  work  while  itâs  still  available  to  her
sheâs  incredibly  independent  ,  very  confident  &  extremely  adventurous
though  nova can  be  quite  self  absorbed  &  self  obsessed  in  the  sense  that  her  career  & herself  are  the  only  priorities  in  her  life
* . â  đ
đđđđđđ
 .  â
ride  or  die  ,  girl  squad  ,  best  guy  friend  ,  brother  like  relationship  ,  good  influence  ,  party  friends  , drinking  buddies  ,  shopping  friends  ,  gossip  squad  ,  only  like  each  other  when  theyâre  both  drunk  , on  &  off  hookups  ,  friends  with  benefits  , one  night  stand  ,  ex  boyfriend  ,  ex  girlfriend  ,  will  they  / wonât  they  ,  costar  ,  producer  ,  fellow  model  on  a  job  ,  enemies  ,  rivals  ,  annoyance  ,  angel  on  her  shoulder  ,  tagalong  &  so  many  more  !! Â
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tired
- iâm so tired of feeling bad about how i look, always uncomfortable and hyper aware of how i move and stand and exist because i know i look fat fat fat
- i hate how iâve been trying to lose weight for years and literally nothing has changed. if anything, iâm ironically fatter than when i started.
- i havenât worn leggings for years without a shirt or hoodie to cover my thighs. i just!! want to be comfortable!!!! even when iâve lost some weight and my waist is smaller, my thighs stay. the. same!!!!! guess iâll just live in oversized sweaters for the rest of my life
- with every single day that passes, i somehow manage to find one more thing about my body that i find absolutely repulsive :))) i used to just want a smaller waist, and then i realized nop girl your thighs are massive, and then wow that back fat is really gross, and then oh i donât have any pictures from a few years ago of my arms were they always this fat holy crap, my cheeks are so chubby ew, i canât wear leggings, i hate skinny jeans, baggier jeans just make me look even fatter, my waist is too fricking wide, forget about tank tops or anything that shows your shoulders and upper arms, better yet just wear oversized clothing to make it appear as if youâre still tiny and slim.. wait was i ever actually skinny..?
- if i never started developing an unhealthy relationship with food, iâd probably still be about as skinny as i was a few years ago, or at least my metabolism would still be decently fast and losing weight would seem less like a do or die mission and more like ohh lemme just eat some more fruit and jog a lil. and then i wouldnât be prompted to binge!! because losing weight wouldnât be that deep and soul consuming!! and i would know what eating till iâm full feels like! but i literally donât know what full feels like because iâve wreaked my body beyond repair!! only 17 and my body is already failing me. cuz i failed it first, of course.
- and now iâm back here, knowing full well that continuing down this road is going to completely mess with my mental health once againÂ
- and iâm somehow convincing myself like the dozens of times before that this time iâm gonna do it right and lose the weight fast and be skinny and pretty. as if it was that easy?? if it were that simple, i wouldnât be here, realizing iâve basically spent all of highschool and some obsessing over losing weightÂ
- even so, here i am, promising myself iâm going to be skinny by the time this year ends, and i better be at a stable skinny by the time i graduate. while hoping i donât fail my academics and uni applications by being too preoccupied by pretending im not self destructing ;)
#anorexia#ana#eating disorders#rant#ednos#ed#relapse#starve#starving#thinspo#thinspiration#tired#kiespeaks
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@kittykatlow ok sweets here you go...again đthis time I'll leave it upđ
Would you have sex with the last person you text messaged?
No
You talked to an ex today, correct?
No
Have you taken someones virginity?
No
Is trust a big issue for you?
Yes
Did you hang out with the person you like recently?
Yes
What are you excited for?
I'm a pretty excitable girl...so little things like new art supplies I ordered
 7. What happened tonight?
đ stuff
Do you think itâs disgusting when girls get really wasted?
No judgment do you sis stay safe
Is confidence cute?
Definitely
What is the last beverage you had?
Pineapple strawberry blueberry pear orange smoothie "
"
How many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?
Very few like I have fingers left on the one hand im using to count
Do you own a pair of skinny jeans?
I own several
What are you gonna do Saturday night?
No idea I'm not a planner
What are you going to spend money on next?
Hopefully a cute little dress
Are you going out with the last person you kissed?
Yes
Do you think youâll change in the next 3 months?
Change no..grow Hopefully
Who do you feel most comfortable talking to about anything?
Daddy Bear
The last time you felt broken?
When my grandmother died
Have you had sex today?
No...LDR Covid stay at home orders all travel plans canceled
Are you starting to realize anything?
Nope
Are you in a good mood?
Yes
Would you ever want to swim with sharks?
Not even a little
Are your eyes the same color as your dadâs?
No
What do you want right this second?
Icecream
What would you say if the person you love/like kissed another girl/boy?
Depends are he or she our 3rd
Is your current hair color your natural hair color?
Yes
Would you be able to date someone who doesnât make you laugh?
Never!
What was the last thing that made you laugh?
Tik Tok
Do you really, truly miss someone right now?
Yes
Does everyone deserve a second chance?
Mostly
Honestly, do you hate the last boy you were talking to?
No, hate does not serve anyone
Does the person you have feelings for right now, know you do?
Yes
Are you one of those people who never drinks soda?
Guilty
Listening to?
Personal Jesus by Depeche Mode
Do you ever write in pencil anymore?
Yes
Do you know where the last person you kissed is?
Yes
Do you believe in love at first sight?
No
Who did you last call?
Daddy Bear
Who was the last person you danced with?
Myself
Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?
The only reason you ever should...i wanted to
When was the last time you ate a cupcake?
A couple of months ago
Did you hug/kiss one of your parents today?
No, covid mom is immune compromised i would never put her at risk...i miss mom hugsđ©
Ever embarrass yourself in front of a crush?
More than once
Do you tan in the nude?
I have been topless but I burn
If you could, would you take back your last kiss?
Nope
Did you talk to someone until you fell asleep last night?
Yes
Who was the last person to call you?
Daddy Bear
Do you sing in the shower?
Poorly
Do you dance in the car?
Like a stripper
Ever used a bow and arrow?
No
Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
Graduation
Do you think musicals are cheesy?
Yes but I đthem
Is Christmas stressful?
Its the most wonderful time of the year
Ever eat a pierogi?
Omg yes my mom and I went on a binge for like 3 months
Favorite type of fruit pie?
Peach cobbler
Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Cardiac surgeon
Do you believe in ghosts?
I definitely believe in displaced spirits...Creole is strong in this girl
Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?
Often
Take a vitamin daily?
Yes
Wear slippers?
House boots
Wear a bath robe?
Rarely
What do you wear to bed?
Skin
First concert?
lollapalooza
Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?
Wal-Mart target
Nike or Adidas?
Cheetos Or Fritos?
Cheetos
Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
Both
Favorite Taylor Swift song?
You made a rebel of a careless man's careful daughter
You are the best thing, that's ever been mineâŠ
Ever take dance lessons?
No
Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?
No, but I really like the whole helping them remove a tie and unbutton a shirt after work
Can you curl your tongue?
No
Ever won a spelling bee?
Oh no no no
Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
No
What is your favorite book?
Light in the attic
Do you study better with or without music?
With
Regularly burn incense?
No
Ever been in love?
Yes
Who would you like to see in concert?
Beyonce/ Aerosmith
What was the last concert you saw?
A drag classic rock show in Vegas
Hot tea or cold tea?
Botg
Tea or coffee?
Tea
Favorite type of cookie?
Animal
Can you swim well?
No
Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?
Yes
Are you patient?
Yes mostly but also not at all
DJ or band, at a wedding?
Band
Ever won a contest?
Yes I won an art thing in HS
Ever have plastic surgery?
No
Which are better black or green olives?
Black
Opinions on sex before marriage?
Sexual compatibility is so important. Knowing that before marriage is important IMO
Best room for a fireplace?
Den
Do you want to get married
I think yes
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OKAY so i actually have some info on my dumbfuck boy ken, so iâm way more prepared for this intro in comparison to the absolute serving of dust i gave yâall with winona... yikes. anyways ! once again feel free to lms for plots or w/e cos im open to anything and everything ~
kenâs pinterest: here !
content warnings: alcoholism, death, headassery
holy crap, is that THOMAS DOHERTY over there ? nevermind, it must be KENNETH FRASER, that COMMENTARY & COMEDY youtuber. isnât it crazy that theyâre TWENTY-FIVE and already have 3m subscribers? i heard that theyâre known to be DETACHED, but also pretty MAGNETIC, just like a typical SCORPIO. ( lazy smiles hidden behind the glint of a silver flask, outlandish stories that youâre never sure are true or not & the longest day of the year )
OK so ! a little disclaimer first: i donât know SHIT about scotland / scottish accents beyond what iâve seen in outlander ok ! i really just be faking it til i make it so ! @ me if u want ~
moving on.. im gonna go off my previous setup and start with his personality cos lbr thatâs what yâall really care abt ~ heâs a little shit ! a gd moron ! really goes out of his way to be obnoxious & charming UGH id like to strangle him.. think joey tribbiani mixed with cody ko⊠but with a horrendously unintelligible scottish accent (: he really be like that All The Time smh
not the smartest ?? your boy actually graduated from harvard with honors and yet ?? yeah heâs a little dumb but itâs chill cos heâs p much got .. no sense of embarrassment ? cannot recall a single moment of his life when he felt embarrassed or regretted doing/saying something so .. catch him making self-depreciating jokes on the daily. on the flip side tho .. if someone was gonna like constantly get on him abt it he might 100% get in his feelings and uhhh when he do.. thatâs when fists start flying ? most cos heâs always on his way to a blackout binge ;)
on top of that he also has .. little to no sense of self-preservation .. will p much do absolutely anything even if itâs detrimental to his physical, mental or emotional health ! love that for him ! Makes Bad Choices, essentially ( makes rash & not-thought-out choices ). never says no to a dare, p much always dtf cos lbr his libido is .. out of control and i hate him ??? & ALWAYS willing to break a rule or twelve
& now for the fun part ⊠heâs a functioning alcoholic ! Big Time ! at his happiest when intoxicated and will p much always have alcohol on him somehow ? heâs usually got a flask plus a buzz throughout the day sighs so smh ! honest to god he probably canât remember the last time he was completely sober so uhhh thatâs fun ig ?? the big thing is that itâs been going on for so long that his tolerance is so high he keeps needing more and more to stay buzzed .. so itâll likely eventually ⊠start to cause some real problems âŠâŠ. would be wild if his subscribers found out *wink wink*
a phat hypocrite tho ! love it ! will literally get annoyed with people who lie and play games when thats .. all he do .. god heâs actually the spawn of the devil i want him dead
SHEW OK onto a little background ! grew up in edinburgh ( obvs, sighs ) with his parents who were both school teachers so his upbringing was p modest ?? p normal ??? honestly .. his life was super normal til he was twelve & his parents died in a hit & run when they were crossing the street :/ from then he had to live with his uncle who was ⊠uhhh.. a Garbage Human Being lmao ! Basic rich businessman on his bullshit .. thinking heâs the absolute god of gods reincarnate.. manipulating women .. talking down to ken .. treating everyone like he was better than them .. yeah, just a general piece of shit tbh. definitely not happy to have a preteen suddenly in his charge so ken was like .. Fine ? iâll do whatever the fuck i want then ? & basically ⊠did everything he knew he shouldnt have done lol
the only thing he really stayed on top of was his grades in school cos it was his best chance of getting the absolute fuck away from his uncle for good and doing it without having to rely on the bastardâs money/connections blah blah whatever so even as he was acting like a fuckinâ fool, he was getting straight aâs & p much being on a first name basis with all his teachers BJOVN we love duality
it was all fun and reckless until he had a real brush with death when he was seventeen. he was fooling around with his buddies, drunk right off his ass, acting like a piece of shit & making a complete ass of himself when he found himself underneath the motorcycle he was driving so.. he ended up spending a good amount of time in the hospital & came out of it with a nasty scar through his left brow & three shattered fingers that wouldnât ever heal properly ( heâs left handed but had to relearn how to write and do everything with his right hand after it all ).
after that he decided to get the hell out of dodge ( .. scotland ) and move to the states & honestly thank the lord he got accepted into harvard cos otherwise heâd have had to choose between cambridge and oxford, neither far enough away from his uncle & his past as he wanted to be so ((: my mans lucky ig !
in college he got rly close with the guys in his dorm + rushed a fraternity ( a BUSINESS one, not a fun one so he was not up in there partying and hazing poor, unsuspecting scholarship kids ) & thatâs when he rly started to feel content with his life ?? all it took was a move to a foreign country and the power of brotherhood *rock n roll emoji* and yk.. booze !
anyways ~ he started his channel in college as a way to let out the absolute dumbass in himself in a constructive way that didnât involve getting into fights or doing hard drugs lol it started out as a sort of vlog channel until he got tired of carrying a camera around all day and it just kinda naturally progressed into a commentary & comedy channel as he found sitting in front of a camera and talking absolute nonsense about other nonsense was kinda like his calling, even if he has to write a transcript for subtitles cos everyone complains abt not being able to understand him.. itâs fine donât worry about it
heâs uhh p much having the time of his life, tho he uhh Does miss home something fierce ( but no worries he just drowns all that shit out with some aged whisky lol ! ) & lowkey wishes he didnt have to continuously drink himself into a stupor to get thru the day but here we are ;)
anyways im super tired of this intro lmao so just mssg me if u want any specific details ONFIJC & i dont have any specific wanted connections ? cos being unprepared is My Brand, so iâm down to brainstorm w/ everyone who wants a crack at my mans kenny ~
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literally just a dumb unorganized list of school tips
source: im a grad student. iâve had a lot of school. also iâm adhd & mentally ill and require +8 organization. this is mostly directed @ college students, but maybe high school students can use it too, fuck, idk, itâs been forever since i was stuck in that hell hole
just say âprofessorâ either ur using the correct title for a person (will make them feel good) or youâre giving them a bigger title on the assumption they deserve it (which will make them feel good) and also prevents having to ever i mean ever use their names
talk at least 1 time a week in each class, aim for 1 time a day. even lecture classes. i fucking hate talking in front of more than 5 people, so what i would do is prepare a question about the hw/etc (even if i didnât need it answered) to ask the professor after class so they saw me and got used to me and saw i was invested in their class. about 89% of teachers - if they see you try, they will pass you. i mean itâs literally that easy. i know people who went from like a c- but because they legit tried, their grade got bumped up to a b-.Â
if u have to bring a laptop, pre-download the required material/screenshot it, and then turn off your wifi. itâs too easy to not listen.
physical writing will always give you more information recall over typing.
nobody cares about stupid shit anymore trust me they donât remember that you were accidentally locked in a towel out of your room bc they have their own dumb shit that happened.... in college all the âcringe cultureâ turns into âgod i wish that were meâ culture ... wear ur onesie to a party trust me you make +800 friends and 799 of them will be girls telling you youâre adorable and theyâd die for you
about locking urself out.... if ur like me and can breeze past post-it notes placed in obvious areas, donât be a dumb bitch and rely on post-it-notes. while most schools offer 1 free lockout, dont rely on it - it once took 2 hours before someone could get to me. i was in a towel, which meant no phone. so like. anyway, what i do now is i put something on the handle of the door i have to open/unlock. i canât just open the door w/out the thing falling down and making a loud âyou dumb bitch unlock the door before u showerâ sound.Â
this works for all important donât-forget it things. other obstacles iâve used to remind myself to do something include: putting a chair with my wholeass posterboard in front of the door, an entire printer with a single piece of paper that just read âfor the love of god check to be sure you have that essayâ, and a recycling bin i kept forgetting to empty. guess what bitch finally emptied the bin once it was between me and a swift exit!
no offense and like the whole âitâs the best years of your life!â thing is great but in reality everything goes better scholastically when you treat it as âi came here to win, not to make friends.â i still did make friends, went to parties every weekend, was popular enough iâd be invited to several on one night - but i came there to win. when i put my scholastic life and my mental health first, i went from a 2.0 to a 3.98. yes you can, bitch.
youâre spending the money. donât squander it. trust me when i say i know plenty of people who breeze through, bc you often can. but like. donât. challenge yourself bc like. talk about an investment.
if you hate your major, change it. donât make your life something you canât stand. on that note, do NOT agree 100% to a track until you have at least some experience in the field. i cannot tell u how many ppl i know who got their whole masters/phd program done, walked into their new profession, and were like, Oh Fuck, I Canât Live Like This.
college literally offers so many free things and if youâre not taking advantage of them whenever possible i get it but like. try to take advantage of them. this is everything from your gym (which probably has free classes dude) to clubs to like. sober events. these sober events are so ... fuckin good dude iâve made mason jars with little plants in em... bee aviaries... candles.... go to the free stuff
oh ps on free stuff i wanna say about 4 of 5 days thereâs free food on campus just look for things like job fairs, presentations, or discussion groups. also while youâre there at the job fair like. u know, go to the job fair in earnest
i took off 2 years to work and also to just. recover from my bullshit. and it took me 6 years and 3 schools to get my bachelorâs. it wasnât easy but bitch i lived. thereâs no such thing as âtoo longâ to graduate if thatâs truly what you want to do.
if on the meal plan, eat as clean as you can the first week. then introduce each part of the cafeteriaâs possibly-food-poisoning-creating foods one at a time. give @ least 2 days between each experiment so you know for sure if you get sick what caused it. i literally never eat meat at school but you can still get sick off of unwashed lettuce/salad dressing that hasnât been refrigerated properly/weirdass things you wonât even think of. this prevents like. dying in a public bathroom.
white loaf bread can be gross & boring. discount bakery section for your slightly chewy artisianal bread needs. if overstale, either toast it or dunk it into water and microwave it (unless u got an oven. use the oven if u can)
steal as many apples from the dining hall/events/etc as physically possible just do it they keep FOREVER and @ some point youâll be like. fUCK i need a nutrition. ps if youâre keeping them in ur backpack (i wouldnât keep more than 2) make sure to wrap w/a few paper towels so if you drop your bag you donât get apple mush
write it all down bitch. âiâll remember itâ no you wonât. unless you are capable of remembering every idea on this list and in order, you wonât remember it. in general, if you write something 3 times, you will recall it correctly at least 80% of the time. i also read it out loud to myself, bc, you know, auditory recall
DO NOT just put your assignment at the top of your notes, unless youâre 100% sure that will work for you. in most cases, itâs much better to have a planner/agenda/place you expect to look for assignments. +7 points if you lie to yourself about deadlines and move them all up.
like not to sound too much like a DARE ad but like. if you donât like it/donât want it, donât fuckin do it. the idea that âthereâs nothing to do if you donât partyâ is such bullshit. like i promise if youâre like âi am a grouch and want to stay in and binge netflixâ about 45 ppl will show up in pjs like âbitch fullscreen it, im a grouch too.â thereâs also like. the chance to just.... not overindulge. on wednesdays i have âwine wednesdaysâ where we sit around and drink a glass of wine while we do our hw. itâs chill and friendly instead of like. drink until u vomit. donât feel like you either gotta slam the breaks or the gas pedal, is what i mean.
PLEASE know the signs of alcohol poisoning/overdose. most schools have a âSafety Always Matters Mostâ policy, which means that you can call for help w/out getting into trouble. if you think someone is in danger, act. this also goes for making sure ppl get home safe even if theyâre just incapacitated, not poisoned. step in, dudes.
also just. notice when ur starting to rely on stuff too much. iâm super easily addicted to things, so i keep a healthy distance from liquor. i donât let myself âdrink to feel betterâ bc thatâs a scary, scary thing to link to feeling better. if you or somebody u know starts drinking all the time/gets anxious if they donât drink/drinks in the daytime .... get help. schools have counselling services for a reason.
youâre gonna get a cold/flu of some sort in the first 2 months just brace for it. in the meantime, drink vitamin c, try not to touch too many handles, and when people say âthereâs something going aroundâ believe them.
watch kaplan nike just do itÂ
if you can teach it, you know the material. a super good way of knowing if you studied the right way is to try and teach the material to a stuffed animal/imaginary class.
âi donât know how to studyâ bitch me too the fuck. this is usually bc weâve been taught that studying is just sitting down and staring @ ur notes. itâs not. itâs different for everyone, and you need to understand itâs 99% preventative care. if you donât go to the class or do the homework, studying is going to fucking suck, bc youâre learning the material all at once for the first time. the place you should consider âstudyingâ is âiâm confident in 70-90% of the material, but need to review.â do not let yourself fall behind .... just go to office hours and ask questions if ur not getting something. studying should feel like youâre remembering what you already knew but kinda forgot, not like youâve been blindsided.
the whole âwriting it down in ur own wordsâ while u have been told this 700 times it really helps bc it means u gotta translate it through your own understanding. if you canât, and itâs not bc the material seems too obvious to you to state in another way - ask yourself if you donât understand the material. chances are u are missing a bit of info.
i know itâs like A Thing that Some People do but i never had the mental health points for it but i know some people just take 15 minutes after every class to review their notes. since iâm 100% early to every class ever, obnoxiously so, i try to do it before class. having the last classâs notes up in my head super helps. like. put down the phone i know youâre socially anxious me too but review those notes. chances are if u start flipping through pages other ppl will too. this is also fun bc as soon as you start this whole thing, at least one person will be like âis there a test?â no bitch thereâs no test but im gonna be ready when there is!
literally so much of success is fucking posturing i could link about 800 peer-edited studies that show that when a student is expected to do well (and knows they are), they do well. like i literally didnât change my appearance at all, never bothered to look nice (once winter hits i wear 67 layers all the time), but when i showed up after my 2 years off from school, i presented myself with the whole âi came here to winâ vibe and people... really respected me? i mean in hs i remember ppl saying shit like âyeah, well, you arenât gonna have the homeworkâ. by the time i was in college i had an honest-to-god conversation which included someone being like âso tell me what youâre overachieving at right nowâ like they just expected it from me. wild.
i live by âbite off more than you can chew, and then CHEW ITâ but itâs probably unhealthy. the truth is that i have a lot of energy all the time (lmao adhd!!!) and i used to get told i was âtrying too hardâ and for a long time (still???) i didnât (i donât?) know what that was, you know, bc i had a D average, clearly i wasnât trying. it turns out i was just. putting all my energy into stuff that wasnât making me happy like toxic friendships etc. when i decided ânope, all this energy is for me and my schoolworkâ..... uhhhhh suddenly i was a golden child and everyone praised my try-hardness ... itâs a fuckt up system tbh
take at least 1 class just for fun. i try to do that every semester. it helps break up all the requirements. if youâre like an engineer and got no time or credits left to spend, try to audit your fun course.
make ur advisor love you i donât care what it takes make them cupcakes show up to thank them i dONT CARE just do itÂ
the library isnât always the best place. if i start getting anxious bc i pavlovian train myself that library=work, i find a new place to go to do hw. try to go outside if you can!!! not like where i live bc like itâs snow all the time but try. a little green really really really helps depression.Â
if youâve been in the same âStudyingâ place for 1 hour and havenât done anything the chances are Something Isnât Right. first, look @ ur body. are you not focusing bc of some pressing physical need? sometimes just taking a shower and coming back helps. are you uncomfy? are you too comfy and going to sleep? if body okay, look @ the material. do you not understand it? do you just need to switch to a new topic for a little bit? can you find a youtube video that will help you better understand it? make notes on what you donât get so you can ask in the next class. if itâs not the material, itâs not ur bod, check the Actual Space. sometimes just getting up, going for a short walk to a new place, and trying it there actually? really works? if none of this is working.... try ur brain next. hardest to reset bc like, what, turn it on and off again? i use things like caffeine, a short workout, a nap, or a podcast all to just... give me a little boost.Â
donât be afraid to leave. i mean this about class, friend groups, and the college ur at. just get up on outta there if ur not feelin it. i cannot recommend âdrop the classâ enough. even if itâs a required course see if u can switch the times if u hate the professor day 3 itâs not gonna get better just get the fuCK out
donât nap in the same position u go to sleep in, nap upside down w/ur head away from ur pillow. donât ask me why but it works to 1. fall asleep faster 2. make sure u sleep okay at night and 3. wake up less annoyedÂ
on that note donât ever do anything in ur bed in a sleeping position unless itâs genuinely sleeping in it. body will get confused. just sit up, lazybones.
when/if the library has those therapy dogs during finals week.... just go pet them make the time for it
ask before hugging people, but donât expect a âyesâ
get a backpack that fits and doesnât hurt ur back u fuckin hippie idc how cool it is to wear ur backpack super low just donât do it itâs not worth it
the tutoring center is a fucking goldmine.... free essay edits my dudes
bring a fan dorms are always hotter than u expect
switch dorms if u can if u realize ur in the wrong room/wrong roomate like just donât bother with nonsense
when in doubt, follow preschool rules. tell ppl when they did something cool, just ask when u need help, and be confident even in your mistakes, because at least u tried
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hi howdy hello!! i go by jess and this is my first time playing my sweet bb girl, so iâm pumped! more about my girl audrey below the cut!
â Â ( SARAH JEFFERY ) Â â Â dude, shut up ! AUDREY ROSE from DESCENDANTS is on screen. their fans swear theyâre just DETERMINED & OUTGOING, but weâve all seen their JEALOUS & STUBBORN side ! according to TRUMAN WIKIA, theyâre TWENTY-ONEÂ years old, BISEXUAL, & identify as CISFEMALE ( SHE/HER ). theyâre currently a STUDENT & are RELIEVED about life in truman. luckily they have HER DIARY & HER SONGBIRD NECKLACE with them & can visit THE FAIRY COTTAGE whenever they want. penned by JESS.
sooooooooo confession: iâve never watched a descendants movie from start to finish đŹÂ I know! crazy considering Iâm playing a character from the movies, but like, have you guys ever seen a character and just be like wOW, that is My Type of character? cause thatâs what happened with audrey. descendants 3 came out and was trending, and I checked the tag and like was đđđ to audrey to the point that I watched queen of mean and got HOOKED. caught a replay of the movie and watched all the audrey parts while skipping over the rest. since then Iâve been in love with my girl and sheâs been on my mind so much that Iâm returning to rp after a small break to play my girl. In preparation I skimmed through descendants 1 & 3, and adureyâs youtube short story so Iâm good to GO.Â
CANON LIFE
âA lifetime of plans, gone. Our family status, gone. Audrey, you were supposed to be his Queen, and you let him slip through your fingers. Your mother could hold onto a prince in her sleep.âÂ
daughter of sleeping beauty and prince phillip, princess audrey has been groomed since she was a child by her grandmother to become the queen of auradon. sheâd been friends with prince ben since she was a child, and was expected to marry him when she got older.
grew up used to the finer things of life, and as such, audrey was a bit self-absorbed and spoiled. became the most popular girl in school due to her status and beauty. was cheer captain. finally became romantically involved with ben at some point in high school. life was going exactly as planned.Â
then ben decided to invite 4 villain kids (vks) from the isle of the lost to auradon, and everything went to shit. the stark black and white, good vs. evil mentality was deeply ingrained in audreyâs psyche, so she was very much AGAINST the idea of any isle kids coming over. convinced the vks were up to no good, she never warmed up to the them, and bullied them (mostly mal) at times. and you know what? she was RIGHT
mal used a love potion to steal her boyfriend, who then humiliated audrey by serenading mal during a tourney match, where audrey was cheering at. no one gave two shits though?? or suspected foul play at all?? they just cheered and were like âah, cool! our soon-to-be-king has suddenly declared his love for this new vk whoâs only been here for a few days! how awesome and totally natural !! â
audrey was still plenty popular by the end of the movie, but her fairy godmothers decided to treat adurey to a spa trip, which turned into an extended trip that required her needing summer school bc she missed so much school (aka why she was absent for descendants 2)
by the time audrey came back in descendants 3, everyone was ALL up malâs ass crack. ben proposed to mal in front of everyone, serenading her with the SAME song he did in the first movie when he ceremoniously proclaimed his love for mal while simultaneously dumping audrey, and everyone cheered AGAIN for their union. damn thing broke audreyâs whole ass heart. on top of that, her grandmother chastised audrey for her failures in securing ben and basically failing the family.Â
she also lost her status come d3??? like, at the end of d1, she was still cool as fuck. but come d3 girl is not even being invited to her friendâs birthday parties anymore?? she has no friends?? no one gives two shits about how she must be dealing with everything? and wow does that not help things at all.
that night, in her loneliness and anger, audrey decided to steal the queenâs crown from the artifacts museum. it was a petty thing. she was hurt, and just did NOT want to see the crown sheâd envisioned as her own for all her life be placed on malâs head. she didnât have a goal beyond taking the crown. however, when she went to the museum, maleficentâs scepter sensed audreyâs emotions and desires for revenge, and revealed itself to her. itâs glow lured audrey to it, fed into her emotions, and bing bang boom, audrey became the ultra fabulous QUEEN OF MEANÂ
under the scepter's influence, she put half of auradon under a sleeping spell, the other half she turned to stone, then she made ben a beast after he rejected her, and made mal an ugly old hag. she was foiled at the end by mal, and ended up falling under a sleeping curse as a result. with no True Loveâs Kiss to awaken her (rip), the heroes ended up getting Hades to use his magic to wake her up.
at the end, she apologizes for her crimes & her emotions were finally acknowledged when mal and ben stepped up and apologized for their inconsiderate past actions to audrey (wELL, they never actually apologize?? they say âI owe you an apologyâ but both donât like actually say sorry, and thatâs 100% something audrey has noticed for sure). she celebrates at the end with everyone else when the barrier is brought down and is last seen dancing with harry hookÂ
POST CANON
totally headcanon that sheâs still not 100% happy as sheâs shown in the end while dancing around okay
sheâs STILL lonely!! she STILL wants those apologies!! sheâs STILL lost about what to do with her future now that her whole life plan has blown up in smokes. sheâs HURT okay. her friends? abandoned her! ben? abandoned her! that one hurts the most bc after spotting that pic of audrey/ben as children together, I 100% hc that they have been best buds for years before falling into a relationship. and while itâs clear ben was not really ~in love~ with audrey ( i image they ended up getting together bc it was just Expected yknow?), audrey still had feelings for ben. even if it wasnât true love (she def wasnât In Love tho she thought she was), she did still love ben. he was her best friend, and the fact that he never came around to apologize to her for humiliating her the way he did after the love spell broke HURT.Â
also hc that she had to take a remedial goodness class following her stuntÂ
the ending given to her is life a brief showing of her and harry hook smiling at each other all soft like before dancing, which like, iâm game for, but in terms of her actual future, audrey was trying to figure out just how to do life moving forward following everything
TRUMAN
âTell me it was all a bad dream.â
yeah so I said audrey was relieved about her life in truman? 100000% true!
her life was incredibly sad and lonely before, so convincing her that all that shit was all just a bad dream was an incredibly easy thing to do for the descendants actors okay (im sad for her bc of this tbh)
her life as she knows it: she still comes from a family of high status and money. not technically a princess, but she sure does act like one. believes she was born and raised in truman, but was sent to boarding school at auradon prep since she was a child, where she thrived and grew into a typical Popular Girl (head of cheer team/one of the most beautiful girls), before returning to truman after graduating. basically she believes she had the same perfect life she had before in canon, minus the vks, ben, and the whole fairy tale/royalty stuff (basically everything that ruined that perfect life).
all that other extra stuff, including going all queen of mean and losing ben and being drop kicked by literally everyone, is just POOF, fuzzy memories, bad vivid horror story nightmares! every now and then sheâll witness an engagement, or spot a serenade, and itâll trigger an overwhelming sense of sadness, but for the most part, sheâs content putting her life behind her. her new life is a much happier one. that could totally change once she starts encountering people from her past life again.
only really recognizes her family members as family members, and maybe recognizes some past auradon friends (maybe chad charming as her ex since heâs the only one who didnât totally abandon her rip)
since âreturningâ to truman, sheâs entered university on the island. she wasnât sure where she was going with life, but she knew sheâs always been really good at drawing and really good at event planning. so in uni, she decided to keep her artistic talents as a hobby and pursue a career in event planning. in pursuit of this, sheâs a senior at college, majoring in hospitality management.
PERSONALITY
positive: determined, headstrong, outgoing, self-assured, polite, moral, dedicatedÂ
negative: jealous, stubborn, demanding, bossy, petty, close-minded, seemingly mean (tho she doesnât consider herself mean, okay? she just can come off as mean/rude)
CANON CONNECTIONS
ben & mal: need them both bc they are the ones who hurt her the most so iâd loooooove to play out these dynamics in truman!! theyâd be the most Triggering faces for herÂ
jay & harry & chad & uma: underrated audrey ships iâd love to play out bc literally crumbs are given to the majority of these dynamics, and so I want to just...explore them?? three of these 4 are vks and 2 of those 3 are people audrey actively pursued in some sort of ~connection~ at the end of the movies when the Couples got together, and she did that even tho she is very Moral and has confusing feelings about vks, and i just wanna know more!!Â
TRUMAN CONNECTIONS
yeah this is getting long, so Iâm planning on posting a whole separate post in the truman plot tag for these wanted connections!Â
and yeah! thatâs everything on my girl! if youâve made it this far, youâre the best my dudes!! Iâm gonna be on mobile for a good portion of the day before coming on at night, but if youâd like to do any kind of plotting with my girl, just go ahead and hit that like button, and Iâll slide in yâalls dms! â„
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update on my life woo
im sorry i havent been active in ages!!! im on summer vacation and havent gotten the chance to rly get on tumblr much at all.Â
so heres an update on how things hav been for me mentally: i was doing rly good for a while, like once school ended n graduation came n everything i was really happy even tho i was doing really bad food wise. iâve basically been binging every single day, and purging every single day. not restricting at all. eating literally whatever the fuck i want n then feeling horribly awful and throwing it all up. every.single.day. but still, i was âhappyâ or whatever. i even stopped taking my meds. that went on for a while and i went on a grad trip w all of my friends to greece and it was literally fucking amazing, even tho i still b/p every day we were there as well... now im back from the trip and idk i guess i just miss it? iâve been really sad and emotional these past few days and i know that iâve gained a lot of weight even tho i havent weighed myself in weeks but i just know bc the top of my thighs r touching again and its stressing me the fuck out because i dont want to gain weight but iâve literally made no effort in restricting or anything. i feel so invalid itâs insane. iâm moving into an apartment of my own with my sister soon and we have a gym in our building and im really hoping i can get my shit together. really really really hoping.
anyway, yeah, idk if anyones actually gonna read all of this but i promise ill be more active!!
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