#okay....let them cook

[coldasyou]

CLAIRE LIVED AND JARED MENTION??????

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

jin guangshan and lan qiren yaoi perhaps? since their shapes create a perfect balance?

Two old men perform worlds first successful 96.

[grechsblog]

partys cooking headcanons from my brain best to worst:

- bonnie: canonically good cook, proficient in the kitchen, 10/10 no notes

- isabeau: can make a couple of semi-complicated things, although often miscalculates the seasoning. given explicit instructions may be able to cook Very good dishes

- mirabelle: prone to anxiety attacks wherever the list of instructions is given or not. is able to make simple soups or dishes with very little amounts of steps

- siffrin: can successfully boil water on the stove and put/get out something in oven. mostly okay to leave in the kitchen but is Very Likely to mess up the ingredients and/or add some stuff that will make whatever he cooks inedible

- odile:

[starry-bi-sky]

realizing i have. a lot of untapped trauma potential for clone^2 danny because i just Fully Processed Four Months Late the fact that his parents were capturing and torturing ghosts in the basement before he became Phantom. and the fact that he was on house rest for 2 weeks. during that time period. and he wasn't really leaving the house. he could hear their screaming through the floorboards

*points at clone danny* i can give you suuuuuuch a bad time babe ahaha. i've got two untouched years before you meet damian what fucks you up before then

[flumpermergen]

Listen… comparing hoyoverse characters can be a bit annoying but sometimes it’s just too un-fucking-canny to NOT point out

[tequiilasunriise]

“In another life, I loved you right.”

“In another life, you loved me at all.”

Tag your ship(s).

[lovesickeros]

lord its so dark in here the sahara desert of tsaritsa content you are like a shining oasis. your characterisation of her compels me & mihoyo would be hard pressed to top it imo.!! caaaaan i humbly request yr thoughts on her first meeting w a reader of any kind, or maybe even multiple kinds (sagau, sagau god au, isekai, etc) if you so desire...

it really is like a desert here. being the fan of a character we aren't getting until the last damn nation is driving me up a wall but i will persevere bc if nothing else i support morally bankrupt women in media. we r in a severe drought over here but i do my best. unfortunately nothing i say is ever coherent so pull out your translation notes its abt 2 be messy

also this got out of hand but thats bc first meetings w the tsaritsa are tricky to write + a LOT of her characterization lies in deeper exploration then just surface level yknow...NOT A DIG AT YOU this is just my excuse for rambling. gently pats the tsaritsa she can hold so much complexity i do not have the word count to delve into it completely :]

gonna talk cult au for a bit here though because that's 99% of my content. and honestly? she thrives in sub au's of the cult au like villain au + imposter au. it's basically made for her. i mean, early days, the imposter au had been going around for a little while but one of the first few ideas was the Fatui taking reader in so like. it kinda technically actually was. pretty sure cult au Tsaritsa popped up because of the imposter au. a lot of it's writers kinda left though which. man am i getting old or.

anyway.

there isn't much of a chance her first impression is all that positive. at best it's usually neutral, imo, but rarely if ever positive. specifically because i view the Tsaritsa as someone who isn't as fanatical as most of the acolytes typically are towards the creator. she's not exactly going to worship the ground you walk on unlike a certain geo lizard. which is partially why i think she thrives in the sub au's i mentioned.

imposter au, for example. she meets you at your lowest. there's no gaudy extravagance or pampering from the acolytes waiting for you because your own acolytes have turned on you. for all intents and purposes you aren't a "god" at all. which is why i don't think she meshes well with normal cult au reader. the Fatui are made up of outcasts, basically, and imposter au slots right in just perfectly. you're weak, at your lowest, when you meet the Fatui in the imposter au. and the Fatui can help you, too.

a mutual exchange, really. the Tsaritsa sees a tool she can use to one up the rest of the nations and especially Archons, and she has no qualms about you using her and the Fatui in turn. you both want something out of it, after all. whether you just want to be safe from the rest of the acolytes, or you want revenge, or whatever else..she'll give you the power to fulfill it, and she gains the strongest piece on the chessboard when all is said and done.

the best way i can describe the first meeting is "practical", i suppose. she sees an opportunity in you. the ultimate gamble. because if she "saves" you, and you dont trust anyone else because they tried to kill you, well..she holds all the cards, doesn't she?

but the Tsaritsa, imo, is just as capable of being just as fanatical towards you as anyone else. she just won't worship you as the creator. but as yourself? clawing your way back to your divine power and taking back what belongs to you? the Tsaritsa is, to me, a character who's character flourishes in long-term fics more because she changes a LOT between "just met reader" and after having been with reader for some time. she's practically apathetic at the beginning but a lot of her character, in my characterization, shines through LONG after the first meeting.

[ohimsummer]

wip game :3 (thank u for da tag @risuola !!!!!!! ehehe <3)

rules — list the names/titles of docs in your WIP folder + open your inbox to have people ask about them!

(some of these don't have names nvjfnvks)

bully! stsg x virgin! reader

—gojo and geto find out their favorite little plaything is a virgin...of course, they're willing to be a little nice and teach you all about sex for you first time.

I HATE MANAMI ft. SUGURU GETO

—your boyfriend's ex can't see to understand boundaries, or the fact that he doesn't want her anymore. maybe there's something you can send her to get the point across.

BOTTOM FEEDER ft. SUGURU GETO

—suguru tells you to bend that ass over <3

puppyboy! satoru x reader

—fwb! au where your current fling leaves his shirt behind. don't worry, satoru is definitely not jealous and is not going to destroy it.

m!preg satoru x reader

—reader returns home to bring her pregnant husband his snacks :33 and worship his body <33

puppyboy! satoru x reader

—satoru decided to be a brat while you two were out, so you decide to punish him with all his favorite toys.

BABY BACK ft. BULLY! SUGURU

—suguru overhears a conversation between you and your friend, and now he wants to get you pregnant.

LIKE IT'S ALL MINE ft. PUPPYBOY! SATORU

—satoru can't stand when you smell like someone else, so he has to mark you up to remind both of you who you belong to <3

POOLSIDE FESTIVITIES ft. SUGURU GETO

—sex by the pool with your boyfriend. which is promptly interrupted by this best friend.

roommate! suguru x reader

—your pussy feels broken while on your period, even toys don't help. no worries, your kindhearted roommate is willing to help you out :3

np tagz: @staryukis @screampied @twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat @eclipseslayer @kentophilia @pupkashi + anyone else who wants to :33

[mavspeed]

something that really pisses me off is this headcanon that ice would have been or was against mav pulling bradley’s papers for the academy.

like i’m sorry but I need some of you to think for a second. this is a man whose jet wash indirectly also led to the accident that resulted in goose’s death and probably carried that guilt for half his life too. this is also the man who was there to watch mav and carole grieve for the brother/husband they lost for YEARS. not to mention he was close to goose as well since they were both at the academy. like he would have wanted to protect bradley just as much as mav did when he made the decision to pull the papers. it’s a dumb moment for both of them but again. 100% they would have both thought they were doing the right thing for bradley.

[bleue-flora]

Ya know, it's occurred to me from watching the way c!Dream talks about c!Tommy being trapped in there with him. He sounds not just glad to have company, but also like optimistic, if that makes sense. Like the "We have tons of time to bond," [46:17], "You're stuck in here with me, whether you like it or not. Okay? Whether you like it or not you're in here with me for a while. We're gonna talk. We're gonna have lots of fun. We’re gonna have lots of fun. Remember–remember when we had fun together, c!Tommy? Remember when we had fun together?–” [46:45], and the "I've changed. I’ve changed. I’ve changed–" [47:19]. He doesn’t say it in a malicious, threatening way, which certainly would be expected of him. I mean, the person who imprisoned you is now imprisoned with you, as the big bad guy that seems like some torture opportunity to me (it is the torture box after all lol ;D), but that’s not what he’s suggesting. No, he sounds adamant about change, about bonding, about talking things through. And given that the TNT Ranboo sets off to get c!Tommy trapped was a part of c!Dream’s plan, it’s very interesting that that would be his response. In fact, it’s almost as if he trapped c!Tommy in order to force them to reconcile, which very much aligns with a theory I’ve actually had for a while - what if the plan to put himself in the prison was about restoring his image.

He was renowned as the villain and everyone was after him and anyone associated with him. They all wanted his head, either because of fear or to be seen as some powerful hero who slayed the big monster. Even in the time of peace, they were plotting to kill him. All while he really just wanted peace and friendship, but he can’t exactly have that when everyone hates him and wants to kill him. Sure, he could seclude himself like Techno, but he didn’t want that. He wanted to be back in the fold.

And he doesn’t want to die, but clearly, they were never going to be satisfied until they destroy him. So, he lets them, and he forms a plan for him to be redeemed in the eyes of the server. He makes a prison so they can defeat him and he gets to live. And he makes the conditions horrible so they a) don’t suspect it was his plan and b) so they feel satisfied with his punishment. He makes it super secure so a) people can’t just get in to kill him, b) so they won’t suspect he’s there willingly (he’s very powerful after all), and everyone can feel safe from him. But he implements an extensive visitor system ("I just don’t want to ever be alone.") so now people can feel safe enough to visit him, and without weapons being involved, work through their issues. The idea being that everyone can come talk to him (which they were too scared or angry to do before) and see how he’s not so scary after all. So, that they then can ultimately release him and he can be a part of society again, now that he’s changed. The prison than was a way to de-villainize himself, so he was no longer the enemy.

Meaning, his favor with c!Techno was a backup plan, and that’s why he didn’t set up a system to get the message to c!Techno sooner, he planned on being let out. He just didn’t plan for things to go so wrong and for people to be so cold…

[softquietsteadylove]

hey! I have a request! now this might sound a little crazy and really far fetched…..but let me cook for a sec.

is there any way for the Mermaid AU you could make Gil into a Mermaid? Maybe thena finds a plant for him to eat that either lets him breathe underwater, turns him into a mermaid or both! I was watching Barbie mermaidia today, and I could help but think of these two ( I got the idea from when Barbie and bibble ate seaweed to breathe underwater)! I feel like thena is always learning new things about the human world, so it is Gil’s turn to explore Thena’s world!

as always I love your work! 🖤🖤

"Are you sure about this, Angelfish?" Gil asked, but Thena just nodded so eagerly he wondered if her scales would fly off. She beamed up at him, her fangs shining in all their glory. He sighed. "Okay."

Thena watched from the water as he took a bite of the horrific looking plant she had brought to him. She refused to say what it was, just handing it to him and insisting that he eat the whole thing.

He groaned; it tasted awful, and the texture felt the way algae looked. His toes curled, his feet dipped into the water up to his ankles dangling over the edge of the dock. He gulped it down, though.

"It'll start working any second, just hang onto me!"

And with that, she dragged him underwater.

Usually, Thena was careful about him being underwater. She got nervous about how small human lungs were and what water pressure could do to them. They had only just got his held breath record up to a minute and a half last time they practised.

But Thena sped downward, his hand in hers, her tail propelling them. Gil had his hand over his mouth as she dragged him. He was going to drown down here, they were descending so fast.

But then it got a little easier. He started moving through the water a little faster. He looked down and his jeans were gone, no longer rolled up to the ankles--he didn't have ankles.

He had gills, taking up the work of breathing for him as they sped through the water. His ears changed shape and his eyes adapted to the dark the deeper they went. Scales erupted over his skin and when he looked down at himself, his midriff was exposed and he had a long, thick tail covered in shimmering black scales.

He was a mer!

Thena turned, not even having to slow down as she swam without looking. Seeing her in her element - literally - truly was an amazing sight to behold. "Isn't it wonderful, Gil?"

"Slow down, sweetheart," he chuckled, and she did. Just as naturally as he would slow down from running, his tail was able to slow their speed, moving automatically. He had long fins, too, which both helped cut through the water and assist the power of his swimming. "Wow."

Thena circled him again and again, too excited to float idly. "It's a dream! That herb is almost never found anymore--used far beyond its means, it's all but impossible to unearth."

Good to know the ocean was also capable of overharvesting and causing extinction, just like the surface.

"But Makkari said she had seen something like it and we went digging for treasures," Thena sighed, staring at him with eyes so starry they were glittering--perhaps it was her bioluminescence. "She said I could use it on you."

He looked at his arms, also dotted with scales, although it was different from Thena's scale pattern. "You've always had a magical plant that could turn humans into a mer?"

"Temporarily," she excused, as if what he had said wasn't abnormal sounding in the least. She circled him again before rising in the water in sheer delight. The end of her tail was flapping like a puppy's. "And look at you! I knew you'd be perfect!"

He laughed, accepting it as she threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his back - the small trail of dorsal spines would take some getting used to- and kissing him.

His gills breathed for him as he kissed her back.

"Thank you, Angelfish," he nuzzled the tip of her nose with his, "for sharing this with me. It's...incredible."

She took his hand again, at least swimming at a lighter pace now. "We don't have long, unfortunately. But I want you to see some of what it's like down here."

It was beautiful. Of all the nature documentaries and marine biology live streams and deep sea cam feeds he'd watched, it could never compare to seeing it with his own eyes. Fish were everywhere, among other sea life. And the number of mers wasn't overwhelming, but he had almost thought in his head that Thena and Makkari were some of the only ones. And Ikaris, he supposed.

But he could see other mers swimming together, some of them speeding along, some of them happily swimming around each other in a lazy little dance. Their tails were different shapes and sizes, colours and textures. It was beautiful.

Thena purred as he kissed her cheek.

He didn't really want to experiment to see if he could purr too. But he took it in with her from above the reef spanning below them. "It's amazing--I had no idea this was so close to the house."

"Well, it's not that close," she assured, beginning to swim circles around him again. "You can travel several naughts faster with a tail than even in some boats."

He didn't doubt that. He looked down at his tail again. It was larger than Thena's, and something about her still being small and delicate even when they were in the same state endeared her to him further.

"It is a very striking tail."

He felt embarrassed, although blood didn't rush to his face like it would in his human state. He felt flustered, though, as if he should curl his tail up and try to hide it modestly. "Th-Thanks--I guess this is why you get all shy when I compliment yours?"

"I do not-!" she hissed at him. Her natural habits came out so much more when she had her tail on.

He took her hand and kissed the scales on her shoulder. "Show me more."

She was happy to receive the affection--she seemed to relish it even more than usual in this form. Her tail was better for speed, he presumed. Even with a longer, stronger tail of his own, he could feel the pull of her moving ahead of him. He was happy if she was faster than thim--it meant he didn't have to worry about her as much when she was out swimming alone.

Gil watched some of the other mers looking at him, surely trying to size up where he was from and how he had infiltrated their world. Most of them were in pairs, and while they weren't holding hands or anything outwardly romantic, those he assumed were couples had other signs.

They swam more closely, so closely their tails would collide sometimes, or their fins would brush together smoothly. They didn't hold hands, but their hands did move freely, brushing over and even more deliberately running over their partners.

"We can't go all the way out there," Thena mused, "but this is almost where we first met."

"Really?" he blinked. It all looked the same, just never ending ocean sprawling as far as he could see (which was significantly farther as a mer than as a human).

She nodded, pointing out over the end of the reef. "If you swam out that way another ten minutes, you would find where I first saw you sinking."

A very ungraceful introduction, unfortunately.

He gave her hand a squeeze, "I'm glad I could see it from your side of things."

She tipped his chin to give him another kiss. "We should start swimming back."

"So," he began as they made their way back towards the dock more leisurely. "This stuff really doesn't last that long, huh?"

She shook her head, paddling beside him. "It would be too dangers if it did. Humans could learn a little too much about us."

That was true, and also not a risk that was worth taking. He looked around them, "what if--won't they be angry with you if they find out-"

Thena cut him off, "there's nothing to find out. I'm showing my mate my home territory, nothing more."

He smiled; he could understand a little better what the term 'mate' really meant to her. It wasn't just their word for girlfriend or partner or anything. Seeing the mers swimming around together, he could see that mate meant something a little deeper to them. "Is there anything else I should do as your mate?--while I'm down here, I mean."

Thena seemed to really think about it, at least for a second. But she ultimately just smiled and shook her head, her beautiful mane of hair floating around her in the water. "We have no such formalities. And besides, I prefer our mating traditions back home."

"What mating traditions are those?" he asked with a chuckle. The act of mating wasn't itself a ritual ( he had learned). But she did like rituals such as 'falling asleep in front of the tv together', and 'calling him while he was at the store to tell him they were out of eggs'.

Human domestic life had really grown on her.

"Hm," she purred as they started their ascent to the surface. "I think my new favourite is eating between mating sessions."

He felt as if he could blush again. There were some nights when they were both feeling particularly needy and could go several rounds. And sometimes, in the middle of those rounds, they would get hungry and retrieve some dried sardines (for her) and shrimp chips (for him) to keep their strength up.

Gil kissed her cheek again as the light of the surface started warming them again. "Let's come up with some more when we get home."

[aliasofgeneric]

imagine a conversation between these two

[kuromi-hoemie]

thinking about older women

[skyland2703]

…ok so I got inspired <3

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Thesis in the tags

[rexthefox]

It's okay guys Uzi just showed N some MCR(My chemical romance) songs and he's having an emo arc!!!

(I literally just looked up random lyrics from MCR songs and picked ones I thought were funny.)

THIS IS HOW I COPE.

[sherejuvonmynationtili]

beat the game and this is my Hot Take