#ok now i'm off
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AuDHD is so funny sometimes like what do you mean my hyperfixations/special interests will last for years on end or possibly forever but they will cycle out every month or two with absolutely no transitional period or warning. like i will think about the same topic every day obsessively for 46 days in a row and on the 47th day with no visible cause adhd brain goes "ok! bored of that now" and autism brain goes "dw i got something queued up for ya" and i blast into full blown obsession on some other topic whose mental file folders haven't opened in 9 months. brain's out here treating hyperfixations like a crop rotation. once the dopamine runs out it cycles in another one but once something's in the rotation it never ever leaves. last summer we brought in one from when i was 11. it's so funny to me but frustrating too bc like. i cannot stress enough my inability to predict or control this. or how completely abrupt and random it can be
#actually adhd#actually autistic#audhd#aphelion.txt#ik 'adhd brain' vs 'autism brain' is a gross oversimplification especially given how much overlap there can be#but it at least helps me conceptualize wtf is going on in my head when i do this lol#and yeah i'm mostly referring to fandoms in this post but it can happen w more 'Traditional' special interests too#like my linguistics special interest which hasn't popped up in a couple years now but whenever it does#i will fill literal notebooks while studying 4 languages at once and simultaneously inventing a conlang#and then i'll be like Ok that was fun! and several months later im deleting like. 2gb of textbooks off my iphone to make room for an update#And sometimes yeah there is a precipitating event like 'Oh something new happened in X fandom with my blorbo!' but sometimes it's like#yeah. no. idk either. switch got flipped in my brain and X no longer sparks joy. only Y rn. how come it's Y? yeah idk i also wish i knew#i don't think any of this is actually an uncommon experience for people with these types of neurodivergencies it's just.#the severity of abruptness and TOTALITY of the switch that makes me feel like a weirdo sometimes lol#like I'M getting mental whiplash from this sometimes. idk how y'all are still following my blog
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media: narcissists only get their supply from directly abusing everyone around them until everyone is manipulated and forced to see them as god.
my friend: i appreciate that you did this task for me. you are a good friend
me, grinning, blushing, twirling my hair, getting the supply: haha no problem man
#last npd post of the night because i'm lowkey getting embarrassed by myself now#no longer getting supply injections from admitting i have npd. as is the cycle or smth#oh off topic im listening to placebo. i love placebo a lot. go listen to placebo#theyre so good i wanna see them live#friend of mine has seen them 3 times and i am ssoooo jealous.#anyway. tags.#npd#actually npd#narcissistic personality disorder#npd memes#i guess?#ok goodnight
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OMG YALL D WAS CRYING DURING THE FINALE OF TFO!!!!



what the FUCK Josh?? Why would you do this to me???
#they had d crying#so now I'm crying#im not ok#hes just a BOY#do y'all remember#how he smiled at Orion in act one#fuck off#transformers#maccadam#megatron#d 16#orion pax#megop#tfo#tfone
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no way she's alive ?? yea those mental health breaks because social media makes people suck are wild huh
#star wars#clone wars#star wars fanart#ahsoka tano#captain rex#anyway i bring you this a) because i'm going back to my tcw roots of late and b) because i miss them terribly#as you can see because i can't handle reality i put her in the novel design#cause wdym they split up after order 66 haha what no that didn't happen you're crazy#read it however you want idc ^^)b any interpretation of their dynamic is the best one i think#yea anyway in this amount of time i've gotten a lot better at anatomy and i don't really care about social media anymore#but i have like nowhere to put my art now so *shrug*#star wars the clone wars#artists on tumblr#i've wanted to do one of those post-type drawings and i am .-+ too lazy +-. to color it sooo#signature got cropped sigh. whatever#if you see a mistake no you don't. you know the drill#also i finally watched bad batch season 3 around christmastime and hewiutgeh.#singlehandedly took the show from a 4 to a 10 for me so thx dave filoni we love u as always >>>#lowk kinda missed it here *gazes fondly at the bot spam and screaming and cursing in my feed*#btw i have never used instagram in my life so if this is formatted wrong it's your fault. bye#someone tell me whether or not i should tag this as rxsk because i am very much debating#does tumblr even like them anymore ?? i know ao3 does they're still going crazy over there (>1k works God bless)#“bro's first post back and she's yapping her head off” cmon you know me by now anyway can we talk about season 7 ahsoka#i find no fault in her. she is perfect. she is the greatest version of any star wars character ever at all#no i will not be thinking about whether or not anyone told her about fives. no i will not be thinking about whether or not anyone told echo#ok that's enough bye i'll wait for this to get four notes at most and three of them being comments screaming at me#one more thing uhh suspend your disbelief since anakin liked the post. rots didn't happen and everything is fine !!#my art
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I often think about how incredibly fit Natsume must be, yokai-induced sickliness aside. He spends 75% of his life running from yokai, through forests and mountains and all kinds of shit. Every day is a marathon for him, he arguably gets too much exercise (which might contribute to collapsing from exhaustion a lot. over exercising isn't good for you).
But imagine what a fast runner he must be. He's able to sometimes lose yokai despite their supernatural speed etc. And he's been doing this since he's a child? I just want an episode where it's time for track in gym class and everyone's expecting the kid who's constantly sick and exhausted to be the slowest one, but instead he just passes them all at warp speed. WHEN did he have time to get this in shape, isn't he always inches away from keeling over, his class in chaos. Nishimura and Kitamoto are the least surprised since they've seen him running before, but even they didn't think he was THIS fast., wow, what natural talent.
Actually, there should be a running gag where one of the many stressors Natsume faced over the years is track team coaches trying to constantly recruit him in most of the schools he goes to, so he's constantly trying to hide how fast he is because he can't be a burden and have the people he's living with PAY SPORTS EXPENSES omg :(( and also he wouldn't be able to show up for most of the meetings, so. And also he doesn't like most team sports (the real reason).
He's managed to keep it mostly under wraps in Yatsuhara, but then one day it's the sports day episode and Nishimura trips while carrying the baton as they always do and starts crying so Natsume's like "siiiiiiiigh fine don't worry Nishimura I've got this" and suddenly he's at the finish line. Thus his hellish lot of being hounded by the track coach begins anew, thanks a lot Nishimura.
#once again thinking about an element of a show has spun off into fanfic land somehow#natsume's book of friends#ok what if during the sports day episode there's even a yokai in the way and he has to vault over it and everyone's like what#why did he jump so high there#and now the gymnastics team is interested too#natsume yuujinchou#takashi natsume#i'm actually surprised there's never been a natsume sports day episode#assuming it hasn't been covered in the manga yet#they had a school festival one#hire me to write it#natsume takashi
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EMILY & HOTCH DANCING in 7.24 RUN
#criminal minds#criminalmindsedit#cmverseedit#cmverse#hotchnissedit#emily prentiss#emilyprentissedit#aaron hotchner#aaronhotchneredit#mine#edit#*#otp: you seem to do ok#otp#will i EVER be over this it's been literally 12 years (and a day damn i should have posted yesterday for the anniversary)#forever screaming into a pillow about her face before he makes her laugh and his face after#LIKEEEEEEE if those last two gifs don't just fucking SUM THEM UP#tentative and careful and honest but not open?? chewing glass brb#(off topic ish i'm obsessed with romantic glowing my gifs sorry that i am fully living in 2014 right now??? it just feels right)
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the sea is lovely, dark and deep. zolu ; 78k ; post-time skip; time loop (temporary) main character death; graphic depictions of violence; mentions of blood and gore; body horror
“What’s wrong with you, Zoro?” Luffy asks, stopping him in his tracks and pinning him in place with a simple look. There’s nothing else to it—not anger, no annoyance, just a tilt to his head and that tiny line forming between his brows as the corners of his mouth dip.
He’s already seen their deaths too many times, thought about them all more than he ever thought he would.
It was never supposed to go like this.
I’m sorry I failed and watched you die and I can do nothing to stop it, he cannot say. I know the weight of you in my arms, know what it’s like to cling to all of you and lose you, and I have lost you and will continue to. I can’t stop it, I will stop it. I can’t lose you again—“I’m fine.”
read on ao3.
#zolu#one piece fanfiction#kate writes#hi it’s my one piece magnum opus!!#my dissertation if you will…#i’ve spent the last year working on this fic and it’s hasn’t fully set in that it’s done#i'm so nervous to post this oh my goddddd#please be mindful of the tags!!#in fact i probably overtagged but please proceed with caution to be on the safe side!#this is wild i can’t believe it’s done wowowwow#zoro: they ask you how you are and you just have to say that you're fine when you're not really fine but you just can't get into it#ok this is a lot time to go run off into the woods now byeeee
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BANG CHAN + LEE KNOW 🍬 ATE
#bang chan#lee know#stray kids#skz#christopher bang#christopher bahng#minchan#~#lee minho#createskz#staydaily#bystay#staysource#channiesnet#cb97net#3rachasource#malegroupnet#ultkpopnetwork#dailybg#kpopco#kpopccc#kpopedit#dreamytag#userlau#kiwitracks#vilmatrack#thestephtag#analook#ok im done i'm being normal about them now (<- girl who is lying)#i'm going to launch myself into the fucking milkway. they look so good. both of their lips. throw me into a ditch. god. fuck off.
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headcanon: the boring perfect self control vampire bella thinks she has is a LIE and at one point she caught human scent mid-hunt and snapped. it made her so wild she had to be restrained to the point where things got ugly
i know edward would never dare to do it and meyer would never dare write it and in canon newborn vamp bella would be far stronger than him...
actually. you know who would be stronger than one young vampire? two old vampires. and who would act practical in a critical situation? emmett
imagine edward and bella heading out for a hunt and emmett being like "do you guys mind if i tag along? i feel like snacking". bella's a little mad at the prospect of suddenly having a third wheel (homegirl wasn't planning on just. hunting) but alice gets a weird hunch and goes "no, no, em should go with you" ok nostradamus. he's going.
fast forward they're in the mountain. bella finds having emmett third-wheeling is not half bad. in emmett's head, lowkey it's bella who's the third wheel after so many decades of him hunting together with edward. but nevertheless, it's so fun with her around. all is good until they catch the scent of an entire group of friends hiking just a couple of miles from here, away from all civilization. emmett and edward stop in their tracks, ready to turn around. bella, her guard down, loses it and stars running towards the group, so they have no choice but to charge at her. while strugging to keep her in place, they try to talk her down but she doesn't listen. she doesn't care, she's strong enough to fight them off, and she fights and claws and hisses and breaks bones of whoever gets in her way because there are so many pulses just a few minutes' run away from her and their scent is so sweet and burning and calling, calling, calling to her
while struggling to restrain her, emmett grunts "we have to disarm her". edward catches the image in his head and shouts "no! you can't literally disarm bella!". well, how the hell do you expect us to stop her from massacring all those hikers? we'll just put her back together afterwards. duh!, emmett thinks, and knows he has to act fast so he goes in while bella's busy yanking away from edward's grip and tears off a limb. or two. all 3 of them may or may not be screaming.
a few moments later edward's pinning bella to the ground, holding her face between his palms, forcing her to look at him. her thrashing is not so effective with limited body parts. part of him wants to yell at emmett but that's kind of low priority. he's holding on to the last of his composure while he looks down at bella's feral expression and chants 'baby. i'm so sorry but i'll give you your leg back after you calm down a bit. i won't be able to outrun you if you go chasing after those people now. please calm down. i love you. hold your breath'
just then she listens, stops breathing and her vision refocuses. for the first time she realizes she was on her way to slaughter a bunch of strangers and she broke the arm of the man she loves at least three times when he tried to stop her. she wants to open her mouth and apologize but that will require her to breathe and possibly go crazy with thirst again. so she stares back at edward's panicked eyes and nods at him, her own red eyes just as full of terror.
then she looks over his shoulder and sees emmett waving her severed leg in the air like it's a baseball bat. "hey, did you know that rose wears the same shoe size?"
#this has been brewing in my head since i reblogged that first hunt bella fanart last week#i meannn... wasn't that exactly what bella was scared of becoming once she was a newborn?#twilight#bella swan#edward cullen#emmett cullen#breaking dawn#gore tw ?#also imagine them coming back home and emmett rushing to tell everyone what happened like it's the funniest story ever lol#alice already knows but she's like 300% chill because she already knew nothing too critical would happen because em was there#jasper's patting bella on the back congratulating her for it being her first time having limbs torn off and later reattached#(while in the background eb are probably just so stressed that eventually carlisle has to sit them down and therapize them)#(during that session jasper has to sit between them holding their hands sending chill vibes kgjhjf)#ok sorry i'm sorry i'll stop now#twilight renaissance#also. ALSO the image of two 6+ ft tall guys being unable to deal with a short ass 5'4" girl. i dig this
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He gets a little quirky at night.
#art#digital art#fnaf#fnaf 3#springtrap#he's so bbg guys#LIKES HDIWKBDKD#I TRIEDNMY BEST W NEW STYLE#I DONT THINK I PULLED IT OFF WELL BUT OH WELL#He gets a bit quirky ok leave him slone 💔#hes a lil insane but like bbg#bbg material#trust#PLEASE HEAR ME OUT OKAY 💔#HE'S JUST SO????#pls 👉👈#erhm#im going to die in a fire right now adiod#I'm bavk sgain i wsnt to take him home snd give him s bath#he needs a bath#like extremely#corpse bunny needs a bath#take the knife away from hjm#he'll committ several warcrimes
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LOVE THY GOALIE. GIVE THY GOOD BOY HEAD PATS.
#bruins lb#jeremy swayman#david pastrnak#brandon carlo#pat maroon#linus ullmark#boston bruins#hockeyedit#nhledit#j made a thing#gifset series: hockey moments that make me insane#gifset series: jeremy swayman brainrot#ok now i've got the tags out of the way#i have THINGS TO SAY#SO MANY THINGS#FIRST OF ALL I'M ACTUALLY GOING OFF THE RAILS SEEING SWAY LOOKING SO HAPPY AND PROUD OF HIMSELF#like that is the most 'did i do good?' smile i've EVER SEEN#LOOK AT HIM!!!#second of all#pasta clinging to sway like a teddy bear is something that can be so so personal !!!!!!!!#THIRD OF ALL#'NOBODY WANTS TO LEAVE CARLO' BE ECHOING AROUND MY SKULL RIGHT NOW BC YES#WHO WOULDN'T WANT A HUG AND A HEAD PAT FROM THAT MAN ???????#FOURTH OF ALL#I DEFINITELY DID NOT HAVE SWAY AND MAROON EYEFUCKING LOVINGLY ON MY 2024 PLAYOFF BINGO CARD#i'm sorry it's 4am and i'm unstable so :)#also the footage of the goalie hug wasn't great so this is all we got. there was a close up but the colouring doesn't match the other gifs#so maybe i'll gif that separately tomorrow or smth
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It needed to be done.
#frank woods#call of duty#black ops cold war#black ops#cod black ops#ok but if it's true is it still funny#i wish i was kidding#he has plagued me for nearly 3 years now#i also have way too much to do so of course I'm goofing off and making a dumb meme
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i liked the sparring scene from the start of siege of darkness a normal amount
#ugh i've been working on this for like several days#it's been so long since i fully shaded and rendered something so the perfectionist in me is tempted to just keep adjusting shading opacitie#but no i'm posting it now and then i'm never going to look at it again#lest i notice a mistake#artist things. you understand#these two... they are sooo good to me i love them they're adorable#i love them and their stupid personality flaws and their stupid will they won't they romance and their stupid mutual pining <3#ordinarily a male mc ogling at their love interest might come off as creepy but 1. drizzt has emotional issues so it's ok and 2. he's a gir#i almost put a lesbian flag behind him in the doodle of him staring at catti but i reeled it in#but for real transfem drizzt anyone? i've been thinking of this nonstop am i the only person to ever have thought of that?#i actually legit am shocked i've not seen anyone else in the fandom make that observation yet cuz he's SO transfem coded to me#it makes sooo much sense and catti-brie's relationship with wulfgar is like TEXTBOOK comphet too BUT WHATEVER WHATEVER it's fine it's fine#don't even worry about it#one day i'll rant about it#The Cattidrizzt Yuri Rant#it's on the horizon#but the point is they're cute & i like them#starless night and siege of darkness are def my favourite books so far#ESPECIALLY STARLESS NIGHT LITERALLY SUUUCH A GOOD BOOK#you know how long it's been since i got so obsessed with something that i drew this much fanart of it??? YEARS#it began SO SUDDENLY but these books have me in a CHOKEHOLD#legend of drizzt#drizzt do'urden#catti-brie battlehammer#catti-brie#putting 2 tags for her cuz realistically who is searching her name with the clan name on this site.#lod#forgotten realms#dnd#i feel like because of lighting my drizzt design's skintone looks comically different in every drawing i do of him
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ONE VERY SPECIAL HAJIME HINATA !!!!!! new year's kisses for the birthday boy :)
#martzipan#hajime hinata#chiaki nanami#nagito komaeda#komahinanami#komahina#hinanami#ok that's all the tags. ERMMM TEEHEE !!! i had fun with this one#which kinda surprises me. bc it's been a while since i've drawn#but. kmhnnm reigns supreme in my head always and forever. my little muses#you can tell i had no clue what typa outfit to put kmda in. but it's ok i got to show off the neck so it's fine <3#there's one specific detail in here that i really enjoyed adding. and i'm curious to see if anyone will notice it#if not it's a treat for me but. potential game for the keen viewers out there#OKAY i'm done rambling now. gonna go do some cooldowns and then Go To Bed bc i have just barely managed to evade a headache#happy new year folks <3
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words cannot describe how happy i am that heket remains lamb's #1 hater in the entire world even after her cleansing
#i haven't drawn anyone from this game other than monch in so long. lmao#the new update has infused me with so many THOUGHTS!! it's driving me CRAZY#i had to draw this scene because this dialogue makes me sooo . happy. i love how angry she is. i love that she STAYS angry.#while everyone else feels more at peace she's still pissed off and i love that for her. heket they could never make me hate you#i think. while i don't much care for the bishops overall because i'm an npc enjoyer until the end. i think this solidified#heket as my favorite bishop . like I wish they didn't heal her voice for whatever fucking reason BUT. i can ignore mm's stupid ass decision#and focus on the less stupid ass decisions. <3#ok i'm done talking now. i drew this impulsively i can't stop thinking about this scene#cult of the lamb#cotl#cotl heket#cotl lamb#cotl unholy alliance#cotl spoilers#clamart
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happy soft kisses
#ange draws#hhau#scarian#hermitshipping#SSSF2024#scarian smooch fest!!#ok listen#i just learned this is a thing that's happening#at like 9 pm#it's now four hours later so pls have this#i'm off to eepies#prompt: smiling into a kiss / sitting in lap#had to do it#lap grian!!#hhau art
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