#ok anyway i suck but i hope you like this

[boopshoops]

What your favorite TWST character says about you :)

As a note before I begin: I saw one of these that shamed malleus and randomly even chenya enjoyers- (claimed that they were pick mes or something? 😭) so i wanted to make one that was more positive out of spite <3 make it more about the writing and why people appreciate the characters. Take each of these with a grain of salt i spose- also a lot of them share similar themes <3

(Aka fans who have different views or even blatantly incorrect views of characters will always exist everywhere, but insulting the entirety of a group solely for enjoying a character, many for different reasons, is probably not a great idea!

I get that sometimes people suck and thats understandable, but quit generalizing ok? Ok.

From a malleus enjoyer who just thinks hes a silly little guy and im tired of feeling like i have to defend myself bc he's my blorbo 😵‍💫)

Final note: i love unapologetically taking frustration and turning it into something that can make people smile 💕 also i blindly wrote this from 11pm-midnight :))) dividers by @/cafekitsune!

Heartslabyul:

Riddle: you enjoy and/or relate to the idea of healing from the past. Working hard to improve oneself for the ones around you and yourself: creating a healthier environment where you can be happy

Trey: there is immense complexity in things that are seemingly mundane. Digging deeper and deeper to find something truly sweet and heart warming is your joy.

Cater: maybe you relate, or maybe you used to, or maybe parts of the connections made in the past/presence/future dont feel as deep as you truly want them to be. There is something beautiful about a desire for genuine human connection, but also peace in being alone. There is a safe space for you yet, just be patient. 💕

Deuce: you love drive and determination. An endless stubbornness that keeps one going against all odds. Against every person who tells someone they cant. You watch them get proven wrong, and its pure bliss.

Ace: you find the connection between people beyond words heartwarming: even the seemingly simple ones. The ability to have a connection with someone who can get up to some mischief, tease back and forth, yet be there when you need them to be one of the most valuable things.

Savanaclaw:

Leona: Adversity over a lack of belief in oneself is a very difficult thing to overcome- yet it is very possible with the right crowd, the right amount of time, healing, and effort. You think someone's worth lies more than just within their title/job/appearance, but within the fact that they are able to stand back up and keep moving onward despite the odds. The hope for that change, and the ability to get out of bed in the morning on its own is strength.

Ruggie: Despite being through so much trauma at such a young age, recovery happens anyway. Its not perfect, at times the lessons learned are even rough. The survival tactics that once helped are now hard to ditch when theyre not needed anymore, but the ability to smile and joke and keep pushing onwards is something you value in life.

Jack: Self discipline can be both extremely useful as well as harmful in different ways. You find the way people can constantly strive to better themselves at what they love and/or morally to be highly admirable.

Octavinelle:

Azul: People can be cruel. And sometimes that cruelty inspires cruelty. Sometimes its simply used as a way to move on and survive insecurities created from it. Its hard, its a fight, but those insecurities are part of what make people beautiful. They are nothing to be ashamed of, and even the many tactics and smart ways of learning to overcome cruelness can be beautiful too.

Jade: The mind is extremely powerful. Intelligence and knowledge are not the only important things, no. Using that intel to find entertainment in the surrounding world can be exhilarating. Finding and discovering new unknowns: learning their ins and outs until they're a part of you is something you can relate to.

Floyd: speaking of fun- you love what is essentially the written version of a roller coaster. Ups and downs, ins and outs. Every single twist and turn is exhilarating and new. Every different perspective provides new insight into a multitude of different things. You are along for the ride, and you are having a lovely time.

Scarabia:

Jamil: self discovery can be very difficult after purposefully suppressing parts of one's self for a long time. Yet, the healing happens anyway (once again aha <3). People discover new parts of themselves, slowly becoming more comfortable not only with their environment, but how they react to it. The discovery is freedom, and freedom is bliss to you. New traits about oneself bloom like a flower: if not in the soil, then stubbornly in the cracks of cement. You gently take that bloom from the concrete and pot it, placing it gingerly in a beam of sunlight.

Kalim: Happiness isnt only sunshine to the one smiling, but to everyone else around them. It is delightfully infectious. However, happiness isnt a constant. You think emotions all emotions should be experienced rather than suppressed, because holding back sadness for the sake of others is a disservice to one's self. Discovering your own emotions, any range of them, is what makes people uniquely human. If anyone is holding those emotions back- hell, any part of them back, they need to be let out of the cage.

Pomefiore:

Vil: "Beauty is on the inside" is a saying thats been around for a long time, but beauty comes in so many forms. It can come from the stubborn desire to improve one's self: to be kinder, to help those around you, to be good. However it is impossible to be perfect. At times, for some, this can be crushing. People are hurt unintentionally, natural frustration can brew, the wrong actions can be taken: and thats okay. You believe whats important is to pick yourself up and keep going. To err is to be human, and that is beautiful too.

Rook: Error is beautiful. Symmetry is beautiful. Asymmetry is beautiful. A crack in the side walk is beautiful. Small things are beautiful, big things are beautiful. The nurturing of something through endless care is beautiful. The undeniable traits and hobbies of every individual that make them unique are beautiful. You find the endless optimism in finding beauty to be, in itself, beautiful.

Epel: Sometimes people will view others in ways that they wish not to be perceived as. This isnt in our control, as much as we sometimes want it to be. All you can do i be unapologetically yourself. To be you to the utmost degree. To prove those who thought otherwise to be foolish. You find this strength to find value in yourself despite others opinions admirable.

Ignihyde:

Idia: you have depression /j

Ok for real-

Life can be such a cunt. It can beat a person down, down, down and leave them vulnerable enough to fear it. To fear that beating, whenever it may next come. The anxiety of never knowing what or who will come next, or what one could lose. At times it feels more comforting to find a routine in solitude. But you know that the small things that give joy will wiggle their way in with time. The broken will meet people who love and care and find comfort in the companionship of healing, even from the little things: like a new story to read or game to play.

Ortho: You value unconditional support. Support through everything: the good, the bad, the just kind of okay. Knowing that someone can have ones back for every little thing- to be there solely because they care and wish the best for others- is something you look up to and maybe even wish to be for another.

Diasomnia:

Malleus: god damn people can be so hard to read and understand. They are so complicated: they are books you have to pay attention to from start to finish. But once you reach the end, you have a deep seated appreciation for them, and for the ones who stuck around to read your book too. Even if it was just for a fleeting moment: it is a happy moment. As painful as temporary things can be, it is also what you think can make the relationships we love and have loved so valuable.

Lilia: there can be suffering everywhere. There is war. There is famine. But there are also endless new sights to see. New discoveries to be made to help those still going through famine and war. New ways to love and understand people you never thought you'd understand. The development and positive parts of humanity, even though at times it can look bleak, are ever present to you. You love the discovery: of places and of people.

Silver: you believe that there is solace in being your own individual, regardless of who you are bound by blood to. Being shaped my experiences, friends, hardships, and new places are what make a person who they are. You value finding roots in and making your own home.

Sebek: Dedication can be a hard thing to come by, but when it does it can grab someone by the reigns. Using every waking moment to cherish that thing, learn more about it, become better at something, and strive to better ones self can be very admirable to you. But, on the other hand, it also calls for the occasional rest.

OTHER (just for ones I know well enough, sorry!)

Neige: You love kindness despite hardship. One can go through horrible things and still choose to be kind. The world could begin to end, and one could still choose to be kind, because it means everything.

Chenya: Curiosity fuels exploration. It fuels art. It fuels everything. It fuels excitement. It fuels friendships. It fuels medicine. It fuels life. Curiosity is endlessly fun, and you think that is very whimsical

Meleanor: Sacrifice for others can be tragic. Knowing what another person has given up for someone else, maybe even everything, is gut wrenching but undeniably a selfless love to you.

Crewel: There can be kindness in strictness. In teachings, there can be a parental guide. There can be someone who cares for you and undeniably wants you to succeed. They know that you can, so they push you towards it. You want this support.

Trein: Love surpasses time. When the ones we love are gone, the memories of them are still held close, with the love once given to them, we can show to others through advice and guidance that comes with time. You find comfort in that.

Crowley: People are flawed. We all know this, yet despite a persons flaws... however many there may be, there is still something hopeful and human about it. About having those flaws and persisting regardless. You may even like those flaws, and the unashamed desire to press on even with them on display.

Fellow/Ernesto: Live for yourself. This is what you desire. People are often caught up in material or monetary things. After all, we live in a world that required it to survive and even be respected. To throw away those views and simply live as you see fit: regardless as to whether you earn those things or not, is something you admire.

Rollo: Sometimes the attachment we have to those we lost can be painful. Regardless, that pain is proof that there was care and love. The things done for others, whether alive or dead, are done selflessly. Grief can fuel hatred, but it can also be caused by love. To unlearn hatred and learn to love again after the fear of loss is a natural human experience. It is a process you understand and admire those who take the time and strength needed to properly love again.

Thank you for reading <3

Tags <3

@lowcallyfruity @skriblee-ksk @justm3di0cr3 @cecilebutcher @kitwasnothere

@techno-danger @thehollowwriter @distant-velleity @the-trinket-witch @scint1llat3

@beneathsakurashade @qsoap @twsted-canvas @prince-kallisto @kathxrat-01

@sillyslipperybananapeel @jadelover69 @tixdixl @twstinginthewind

[goodlucktai]

WAIT WAIT WAIT ok im sorry you can ignore this ask and the other ask too BUT I've been on a baby casey & f!leo fatherson kick brainrot lately and I just think prompt 27 would be heatbreaking and wonderful all at once, ok but fr love you big fan 💕🫂

dialogue prompts

27. “Breathe... breathe. Look at the stars, kid.”

it's @soldrawss birthday and i JUST found out because apparently i am a huge joke to her /j

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SOL i hope your day was lovely and that you enjoy this small offering

x

They’re barely home for an hour when Casey’s breath catches in his throat. 

It’s sudden enough that he chokes mid-word and starts to cough, his body trying to clear its airway except that there isn’t any blockage there to dislodge. When he finally manages to suck in a breath that fills his lungs halfway, it rattles in with an audible reedy wheeze. 

Maybe no one noticed, he thinks hysterically, and lifts his eyes to find his entire not-family staring at him from their various positions around the room. 

“You good?” Mikey says, wrapped hands already up like he was ready to make the save if Casey keeled over. 

“Fine,” he says, or tries to. It comes out sounding so hoarse that he might as well have just opened his mouth and croaked at him like a mutant bullfrog. 

Mikey’s brow furrows beneath his dirtied orange mask and he whips around to look to his big brothers for guidance, the way he never really grew out of doing, even after the end of the world. 

Leo is already moving, pushing himself upright off the cot that Raph just set him down on. He waves the instant chorus of “Leo, I swear to god”s away and limps over to where Casey had stationed himself by the handwash sink. He starts to limp over, anyway, and one of his legs folds beneath him immediately, and he would have eaten concrete if it weren’t for all the hands that shot out from all sides to catch him. 

There are still hands to catch him here. It’s nice. 

The tightness in Casey’s chest is unbearable now that he’s given it a second of attention. What he mistook for anxiety and adrenaline was maybe not entirely that, after all. He’s usually better about catching the warning signs—if he’d run the system update that’s been haunting the corner of his HUD for the last week like he should have done, the program designed specifically to monitor his asthma symptoms would have thrown up its own red flag by now. Multiple flags in multiple colors, even, impossible to ignore and more annoying by the second until Casey admitted defeat and took himself to the medbay. 

As long as the update is queued, taking up memory, there’s a ghost in the CPU. As long as there’s a ghost, his family still exists somewhere. They’re not gone, they came here with him. They’re alive and the world didn’t end and Casey can breathe. 

Later, he’ll feel really stupid about this. Later, he’ll hate the way he snatched up Leo’s hands the second they moved into his line of sight and clung to him like a scared little kid. 

But right now he is that scared little kid. 

“Hey, Space-Case,” not-sensei says with sensei’s crooked smile. He almost definitely has a broken cheekbone, and two black eyes, and he’s smiling like he doesn’t feel any of it. “Sounds like you’ve been holding out on us. Slow and steady, life’s not a race unless you make it one.” 

Casey knows what it sounds like when Leo is worried, can hear the upset under the polished glass surface of calm. It shouldn't be comforting to know that, but it’s comforting to know him. He ekes in a breath, it scratches all the way down and it doesn’t feel like it makes a difference, but the success emboldens him to suck down another. 

“You were breathy on the ride home, I thought it must have been from all the smoke,” Leo goes on. “But I guess that was a trigger. Do you have an inhaler?”

“Y–” Casey starts to say, and coughs again, and Leo’s fingers tighten around his before he can panic. “Belt,” he gasps. 

“Okay, that’s enough from you,” Leo says a little shortly. Which isn’t very fair, Casey was just answering his question. Then he realizes Leo’s clipped tone is probably because Casey’s dizziness is overpowering his ability to stand upright.

“Going down,” Leo says to someone else, and instantly, Casey’s controlled fall is arrested halfway is arrested halfway to the floor. 

The last time Uncle Rapha held him, he was much smaller and Raph was much bigger, but somehow it feels the same. He leans back in Raph’s lap, the solid plastron behind him bracing him upright, and clumsily tries to help Leo paw through the pouches on his belt. The third time Leo bats Casey’s hands away, Raph reaches around and holds them still. 

“Let’s let the boss work,” Raph rumbles softly. It’s a miracle that he has any softness to spare for Casey, of all people, who closed the door and left his brother behind it. Left his brother in the dark where the monsters live. “We’re still breathing, right, big man?”

“R—Right,” Casey says, but it’s barely got enough air behind it to count. 

“No inhaler,” Leo announces, already turning to address someone else in the room. “Donnie, metal cabinet by the door, third drawer down, should be one in there.” Turning back, he leans in and pins Casey to the spot with a look. “Keep breathing, Case,” he says. “That’s your only job. Don’t slack off now.”

“Why do we have one?” Mikey asks in a voice that shakes. Casey manages to split enough of his attention to regret scaring him. 

“Red used to have asthma when you were all just little turtles,” Splinter says quietly. “He outgrew it, but Blue always says—”

“It’s chronic, not curable,” Leo says in a falsely bright tone, the cadence of an ancient argument. He catches the box his twin throws over and wastes no time ripping it open and shaking the inhaler into his palm. Within seconds, it’s primed, and Leo is curling one hand behind Casey’s head and bringing the mouthpiece to his lips and ordering, “Deep breath.” 

He obeys, feeling the medicine go to work, and holds without exhaling for as long as he can. It’s not long, barely five seconds. Leo shakes the canister and has it ready for him again when he’s ready to suck in another desperate puff. 

“Okay,” Leo says, studying his face with back and forth flicks of bright gold eyes. “You’re okay, Casey. Breathe.” 

“Breathe… breathe,” sensei says, large fingers combing Casey’s hair back from his sweaty forehead. His hand is calloused from the hilt of his sword, rough with scars that didn’t heal well, and gentle. 

“Look at the stars, kid,” he adds, their family’s little joke. There hadn’t been a clear night since the war started, the skies overcast with smoke and ash and pollution from the Technodromes, but every single room Casey had ever lived in had glow-in-the-dark constellations on the ceiling. 

“Look at the stars,” sensei says. 

There aren’t any, Casey wants to cry, maybe would if he had the breath to. There aren’t any anymore. 

Instead he inhales and exhales, carefully, counting each second in his head. The tension seeps out of the room like water through a sieve. Splinter is talking about hot drinks, April is talking about calling her mom. Four bright lights stay sat, a constellation that Casey is somehow in the middle of. 

“I haven’t had an attack in years,” Raph murmurs. He’s rocking Casey very slowly and doesn’t seem to realize he’s doing it. “Since I was—six or seven, maybe. You kept one this whole time?”

“Correction, the medication expires, so he has consistently replaced one this whole time,” Donnie says, and sways disinterestedly with the force behind Leo’s disgruntled shove of his shoulder. 

“Oh,” Raph says. “But why?” he asks a moment later. 

“So I could say I told you so when you ended up needing it,” Leo replies disingenuously. 

Casey could say that sensei carried an inhaler in his kit every time he went into the field. Even after Uncle Raph died, he stayed in the habit. It saved Casey’s life once, the day they discovered he had asthma in the worst possible way. Sensei didn’t say I told you so to anyone. That was never the point.

“He loves you,” Casey says. “That’s why.”

For a moment, none of them speak. Then Mikey’s smile fills the room like stubborn sunshine finally breaking through rain clouds. Donnie says, “Intelligent beyond your years. I understand now why Future Me kept you around.” Leo seems to be considering the pros and cons of sinking into his shell and never coming out again, hunched small and embarrassed beside his big brother.

Casey can’t see Raph’s expression, but he can imagine what it looks like. He knows the feeling.

Casey was loved by Leo once, too.

[my-my-my]

hiiii can i request a scenario for shinji hirako with an s/o who is usually not physically affectionate but really loves listening to his heartbeat when feeling stressed or overwhelmed?

Oh this is sweet! I think this would be my first Shinji fic. Thank you for requesting it. I'm going to put it with post-TYBW Shinji.

Summary: Work sucks most days, but getting yelled at for something that's not even your fault? That's even worse. Thankfully Shinji knows just what you need.

TW: This is SFW. Workplace abuse, verbal harassment, mentions of stress and incompetence.

“Are you that much of an idiot to not understand where vents should go!?” Yelled Captain Kurotsuchi at you. You flinched as he ranted on about your work in redesigning the Squad 12 barracks.

You and your team were leading the redesign and renovations of various barracks across the Gotei 13 after the war with the Quincies. And you had received the ire of Captain Kurotsuchi. You knew he would be difficult, which is why your superior assigned you as the leader of the small team working with Squad 12. You would be able to handle it. You were focused, diligent and attentive. Any details and requests, no matter how miniscule, would be overseen by you.

Which is why you were exhausted hearing Captain Kurotsuchi rant for umpteenth time today. You looked around apprehensively for Lieutenant Akon. It was much easier to deal with him than the captain, but he was nowhere in sight.

And your colleagues ran off to hide, even though it was their mistake to begin with putting the vent over his computer (and in what world did that make sense anyways!? You wanted to yell at them.)

But no, instead you were being yelled at as you tried your best to apologize for the error. Another colleague ran to remove the ventilation item, but it was too late.

It didn’t help that the rest of Squad 12 looked at you like some kind of idiot, being scolded by the teacher. You hated feeling so small.

So powerless.

You tried biting your lip, squeezing your fists as Captain Kurotsuchi waved you off, muttering how useless you were.

As he walked away, so did you, into another room to calm down. Your colleagues swarmed you, after scurrying away from Captain Kurotsuchi’s fury. It was humiliating, hearing their fake apologies.

“Leave me be, please.” You muttered to them, as they tried consoling you. You couldn’t register what they were saying, but one of them managed to find Lieutenant Akon.

But you were too exhausted and overwhelmed. You had spent over 14 hours doing renovations.

“I’m sorry for this Lieutenant Akon, but I’ll have to resume the renovations tomorrow.” You bowed your head apologetically. “My colleagues here will clean up.” You said, giving them a glare as they sheepishly agreed.

“Thank you for your work today.” Lieutenant Akon said, giving you a wry smile. “I got the gist of what happened. Don’t worry about today. You and your team have done an excellent job so far.” He smiled, “I’ll let the captain know tomorrow.”

“Thank you.” You sighed, bowing your head again.

“And I’ll be around tomorrow. So you can come to me with any questions.” The lieutenant explained, hoping that would make you feel better.

You gave him a soft smile, but left the barracks exhausted. You wanted to scream. You wanted to cry. Renovations were already hard work, and to have someone call you an idiot and every other related word at you, for more than 10 hours?

You didn’t realize, but you were shaking in fury.

“Hey, doll. What’s with the frown?” You knew that voice from anywhere.

And after the day you’ve had, it was a voice you needed to hear.

Without even thinking, you wrapped your arms around Captain Hirako. He immediately tensed at the sudden motion, but relaxed as he wrapped your arms back. Shinji frowned slightly, noticing the shakes your body was making.

“Why don’tcha come back to my office?” He held you closer, stroking your back. “I’ll play your favourite record and we can open those snacks we’ve been savin’ for, ok?” You nodded your head in his chest, as he held your hand, walking towards the Squad 5 barracks.

It wasn’t Shinji’s favourite genre of music, but it helped you relax. The two of you were lounging in the loveseat couch in his office, your body on top of his, laying peacefully as the music filled the room.

Your shaking stopped, thankfully. Shinji looked down as he stroked your hair. It wasn’t often you would want physical affection, so Shinji savoured the moments when they came.

He just hated how it would come to be. What sort of anger, frustration and ineptitudes you must have faced to lead you to this state. You had fallen asleep in his arms, as you cried into his chest about the awful day you had.

Shinji wanted to go down to the Squad 12 barracks and yell at Kurotsuchi on your behalf, but you would have been more upset. Instead, playing a record that soothed you, having your favourite snacks on hand, and of course his presence, was enough to calm you down.

It didn’t take long for you to fall asleep in his arms either. The lull of Shinji’s heartbeat, the warmth of his embrace, and his long, thin fingers, stroking your hair and body, put you in a daze. You murmured to him, with sleep lacing your voice, of what happened. Shinji would squeeze your arm in reassurance, hold you closer to him as he kissed your forehead.

Whatever had happened before, whatever will happen later, will never matter, you thought to yourself. Unconsciously you snuggled closer into Shinji’s chest.

The tenderness of Shinji’s love for you was enough to persevere – tomorrow will just be another day.

Thank you for requesting this, anon! I hope this is what you had in mind.

This is the song I was listening to, that would also play in the final scene. Home - Resonance

[milktea-grn]

🕸

[pnfc]

i haint watched the dang chibisode and idk if ill actually watch it with sound on sdfjk but i have a hurt feeling about them casually imbuing perry with speech for a one off gag because the idea that he needs to talk to communicate is fake. we had 4 seasons of wacky magic hijinks cartoon where perry never needed verbal speech to communicate. they couldve done this gag at any point in the show but they didn't, and the fact that they didn't felt significant. perry's muteness is such a core part of his character, to me, to the way i conceive of him/write him. i don't wanna overreact to a goofy little side cartoon (even tho i'm doing it anyway) but it's still the characters, and it still upsets me! ok that's it i've said my piece

[wildglitch]

Im 2 hours and a half away from debating infront of my class for 30 minutes. Im so fucked

[deoidesign]

.

[johnsbleu]

Hold My Hand: John Wick x Reader Chapter 181

warnings: nsfw hmh masterlist

Walking around the small one bedroom apartment, you try to come up with something bad about it, but you just can’t. It’s absolutely perfect. The kitchen is nice, the living room is fairly big, the bedroom even has an en suite! It’s the perfect apartment. You just wish you could find something to hate. Maybe a nasty smell coming from the carpet, or noisy neighbors, maybe even an unsafe neighborhood. But no.

The family is getting broken up and you hate it.

“Well,” you take a deep breath and let it out as you stand in the living room, “It’s kind of perfect.”

“I agree.” John says, nodding as he looks around. “What do you think?”

Logan smiles as he looks around, “I like it.”

Of course he does! He’s about to have his very first apartment. He’s been so excited this week while going apartment hunting. You and John tagged along for every single one too. Logan said how much he appreciated your input.

“Well, why don’t we go home and talk about all the places we looked at while we eat?” you suggest, and Logan nods his head before looking around the apartment.

John reaches for your hand and thanks the landlord for letting you all look around, then you walk with him and Logan out to the car. You get in the front and nervously chew on your lip as Logan talks with John for a few moments outside the car. You’re not entirely sure what he’s saying, but John glances at you so immediately your mind starts going a hundred miles a minute.

“What was that all about?”

John smiles casually as he looks at you, “Nothing.”

“Jonathan,” you cock up your brow.

“It was nothing. I just told Logan that you seemed anxious.”

You look down at your hands for a moment before looking at John again, “I’m okay.”

“Okay,” he reaches over for your hand and squeezes it, “I’m here if you need me.”

“Thank you.” you sit back in your seat and close your eyes, holding tight to John’s hand.

__

Sitting around the dinner table, you prop your head up on your fist and smile when Ronan tries to shove a noodle into her mouth. She misses but gets it on the second try. She’s absolutely filthy, covered in apple sauce and marinara sauce, a little bit of broccoli too. Someone is getting a bath for sure tonight.

“I liked them all,” Logan says, and you look over at him with your head still on your fist. “I liked that first place because it has a pool. I liked the second one, well, actually, no, I didn’t like that one as much. The last one is probably my favorite.”

“Yeah, I really liked the last one.” John says, then he nudges your foot under the table, “How about you, peach?”

You perk up a little, “Yeah, I liked them all. I do like the last one the most though.”

John smiles, “Ultimately it’s up to you, Logan. You pick which one you think will be the best fit for you.”

“I’m definitely going to give it more thought. I have the notebook with everything Y/N wrote down about each apartment, so I’m going to look it over tonight.”

You smile softly when they both look at you, “You know you can always stay here.”

“You two probably want your guest bedroom back.”

“No! Logan, listen to me, if you’re not ready to leave, don’t leave.” you say, and he laughs as he shakes his head.

John gets up from the table and starts to bring empty plates to the sink, so you and Logan get up to help. Logan brings a washcloth over to Ronan and wipes her hands and face, then he lets her out of the highchair and laughs when she rips through the kitchen to the living room in search of her toys.

After helping get the kitchen cleaned up, Logan grabs a bottle of water and the notebook from the counter, “I’m gonna head to my room for a bit. Look over these apartments, maybe get Daniela’s opinion.”

“She can help you decorate too!” you say, and John starts to laugh, “You should have seen this place when I moved in. Absolutely no personality!”

“I’m not a big decorator.” John says, shrugging, “I had what mattered, which was a bed and a fridge full of food. I did have someone decorate it after a while, but it still lacked any sort of personality.”

You smile proudly, “Then I came in and changed everything. I actually asked John what he liked and he picked out stuff! He has great taste.”

Logan laughs, “I don’t even know what my taste would be. My room back…home was still decorated from when I was like 12. They never asked if I wanted to change my room, meanwhile my sister had changed her room about five times. Mom was always happy to drop hundreds changing her room.”

You bite your tongue, literally, to stop yourself from saying something rude about Laura. You just say it in your head instead.

Fuck that bitch!

“Well, you’re free to change up your room whenever you’d like,” John says, and you nod in agreement, “Just let us know. We’ll buy the paint or whatever you need. If the bed isn’t comfortable, let us know.”

“Nah,” Logan waves it off, “If I’m moving soon, it won’t matter anyway, but thank you.”

You let out a small sigh and quickly replace your frown with a smile, “Let us know what you decide about the apartments.”

“I will. Daniela has texted me about four times asking to see them.” he says, and you smile softly. “I better call her. She gets a little worried when I don’t reply. Not because she’s jealous or anything. My parents would take my phone from me and she’d be worried when I didn’t reply to a text.”

“Well, let her know that she doesn’t need to worry about that stuff anymore,” John says, and you look over at him and smile.

Logan gives the two of you a wave and heads to his room, and you laugh when John hip bumps you. You look at him and smile as he interlaces his fingers with yours.

“What should we do tonight, my love?”

“I think…we should eat a big bowl of ice cream and watch a movie.”

Ronan comes back into the kitchen when she hears the cupboard open, probably in search of snacks--she’s growing like a weed lately so she’s always hungry. She looks up at John with her big brown eyes and points, trying her best to say ‘ice cream’.

John grabs a big bowl from the cupboard and smiles, “I agree. What movie are we watching, Bug?”

You lift her up and set her on the counter, “Are you gonna pick the movie tonight?”

Ronan points at John, “Dada.”

“Daddy can pick?” John smiles as he kisses her cheek, “That’s so nice.”

You smile when John puts a little ice cream on the tip of Ronan’s nose. She giggles and leans over to kiss him when he puckers his lips, causing your heart to squeeze in your chest.

__

**

Quiet sniffles and whimpers rouse me from my sleep, and I roll over to look at Y/N. She lets out another whimper, so I reach over to turn on the light before leaning over her. Her eyes are closed, but her face is wet from tears.

“Hey,” I whisper, tapping her shoulder a little, but I realize she’s asleep. She’s crying in her sleep. “Baby, wake up. Wake up, peach. Hey, wake up.”

I finally get her awake and watch as she blinks a few times, looking at me from over her shoulder. She rolls to her back and wipes the tears off her face, then she looks at me again for a moment before immediately throwing her arms around me.

“Whoa,” I laugh, laying back on the bed with her in my arms. I’m so taken aback by this response from her; it’s two in the morning. “What’s going on?”

She doesn’t respond, so I just hold her in my arms and press my lips to her head. I rub her back and whisper that I love her, but it only makes her cry.

“Are you okay?”

“That was a dream, right?” she asks as she sits up a little, tears on her face, “Please tell me that was a dream.”

I stare at her for a moment since I don’t know what she was even dreaming about, then I nod because she needs the reassurance, “Yeah, yeah, it was a dream.”

Y/N closes her eyes and lays back down with her head on my chest, “Thank god.”

We’re quiet for a few minutes but I hear her crying again, so I tilt her chin up so she’ll look at me. I press my lips to hers and smooth her hair back, then I shift on the bed a little to tuck her in.

“I’m gonna make you some tea, okay?”

“Wait!” she grabs my arm and looks at me, her eyes full of sadness and fear, “You’re coming back, right?”

The look on her face just absolutely fucking shatters my heart. This look just breaks me. What almost kills me is how tiny her voice sounds.

I smile as I smooth her hair down, “Yes, I’m coming right back, my love.”

“Okay.” she says softly, and I lean down to kiss her cheek.

As quickly as I can, I head to the kitchen and whip up a cup of tea for her--chamomile tea with honey. I make my way back up to the bedroom and find her sitting up with her knees tucked to her chest as she stares blankly at the duvet.

“Here,” I whisper, handing her the cup of tea. It’s her favorite mug too. It has a peach on it. “Careful, it’s hot.”

She carefully takes a sip of it after blowing on it, then she sets it aside on her nightstand before looking over at me.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” she nods, then she closes her eyes as her chin wobbles. “No.”

I scoot over and wrap my arm around her, pulling us both back to lean against the headboard. I let her take her time. When she wants to explain what’s going on, she will.

“Can you just hold me for a few minutes?”

“Of course,” I hug her tighter as she wraps her right arm around my waist, “I love to hold you. I’ll do this all night if you want.”

She laughs, “Maybe I do.”

“Then I’ll do it,” I whisper into her hair, “You know I will.”

Smoothing her hair back, I kiss her forehead and just hold her for several quiet minutes. I fear she’s fallen asleep at one point, so I lean forward and smile when her eyes meet mine.

“I had a dream.” she says, and I nod. “Well, it was more like a nightmare, clearly.”

“You were crying in your sleep, so it must have been really bad.” I say, squeezing her a little. With her reaction to the dream, I can only assume that Ronan must have been in it, “Was Ronan in it?”

She nods as she sits up, “Yeah, but you were too. It was…really weird.”

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

Her chin wobbles, “I’m scared to tell you.”

“Why? You can talk to me about anything.” I say, tucking her hair behind her ear, “You can tell me anything, sweetheart.”

“I’m scared that you’ll confirm what happened in it.”

I furrow my brow, “Well, was I mean to you?”

“Yes.”

I give her a genuine smile, “I can confirm that that would not happen.”

She takes a deep breath and tilts her head back before looking at me, “It’s still fresh in my mind, so I can remember most of it. We ran into someone that you knew from your past. You were worried but not too worried. Then suddenly we were back home. I don’t even know if it was the same day or anything, but we were home. I left Ronan in the living room to play with her toys. I came into the kitchen and you were in there, just…being weird. Really quiet. You wouldn’t even look at me. I don’t know what led to us talking, but you told me that you…”

I tuck her hair behind her ear when she looks at me, “I’m right here; you’re safe. It was just dream.”

“You told me that you didn’t love me anymore,” she says, looking up at me with the tear filled eyes, and my heart sinks. She continues through her cries, gasping for air, “You told me that you didn’t love me anymore and that you were seeing someone else and you wanted to be with her, not me. I was pissed. You kept saying that you didn’t love me. I countered that that wasn’t true because we had been intimate the night before and it wasn’t…fucking, it was love making. We made love. There’s a--”

“A difference,” I smile as I rub her shoulder, “There is definitely a difference.”

Sighing quietly, she looks at me, “You wouldn’t look at me, so I said “Look at me, John! Look me in the eyes and tell me that you don’t love me anymore!”, but you just told me that you couldn’t. You could not look at me. Because you were lying. You were pushing me away. Anyway, while we argued, Ronan called out for me a few times. Finally she yelled for me in a voice I’d never heard and when we went out there, the guy we ran into from your past was there holding our baby.”

I clench my jaw at the thought. I’d kill someone if they ever touched her--either one of my girls. In fact, I have killed someone for Y/N, and all that guy did was say he wanted to touch her. I don’t even want to think about the person I’d become if either of them were hurt.

“I begged to trade places and he said yes. You put your arm out to stop me because you wanted me and her. You didn’t want to lose either one of us.” she says, and I hug her, “Anyway, then you woke me up. I assume you found a way to keep us both safe.”

“I sure don’t like the dream version of me.” I say, and she laughs quietly before sipping her tea. “He’s an asshole.”

Y/N sets her tea aside again and smiles at me, “My dream version of you is usually being super cute.”

“I hate this one!” I say, and she smiles softly, “He’s an idiot! First of all, telling you that I don’t love you anymore is completely insane. I love you more than anything in this world. I wouldn’t be sitting here if it weren’t for you. I wouldn’t be the happiest I’ve ever been in my life if it weren’t for you. You are my entire world wrapped up in one person.”

She closes her eyes and frowns, then she leans over and kisses me, “I love you.”

“Telling you that I’m into someone else is stupid too! I’m only into you.”

“You were pushing me away. I knew those things weren’t true.” she says, and I nod my head. “You were pushing me away because someone from your past was back.”

This is what she wants to know. She wants to know what would happen if someone from my past came back. I don’t blame her for wondering. Akira has come here. I’ve gotten calls from other people, which I either don’t answer or I do answer and tell them I’m not interested--those calls are rare. Of course I don’t blame her for wondering. I’ve told her before that there’s always going to be the chance of someone popping up at the house. She understands that.

Just the other day she asked me if there was someone that I would never want to see on the doorstep. There’s a few people. I was honest and told her that. I would never want to see my old friend, Caine, on my doorstep. I know it would only mean one thing, and I wouldn’t go easily and I wouldn’t go without a fight.  

But the thing is, she doesn’t need to worry. I’m not going anywhere. No one is coming back into my life and I’m not going back to that life. Despite the fact that I was worried about that a few weeks ago, I realized that no one is coming for me, and I have no interest and soon people will forget about me. I can only hope anyway. My priorities lie here in this house and with her. I have no interest in going back, not when I’m so damn happy with my life.

“I would never lie to you or push you away. I fought so hard for this life, I’m not going anywhere.” I say as she looks at me with tears in her eyes, “If something like that were to happen--it won’t, it absolutely won’t--I would never in a million years push you away. You’d be right by my side the entire time. We’d go to the Continental. We’d talk to Winston. I am the best person to protect you, so we��d do all of this together. I would want you by my side. I’d want to go through all of that together. We’re married. We chose each other for a reason. We’re the best choice for each other. So, if something like that were to happen, he would never get in the house and just grab our child. He’d be dead before he ever even touched her. I would never tell you lies and say I don’t love you or that I’m into someone else. There is no one else for me. Just you, love. Just you.”

Y/N exhales shakily and smiles when I tilt her chin up, “My brain isn’t very nice to me sometimes.”

“Mine too,” I say, and she reaches for my hand. “But I love you. Only you. Don’t worry about someone from my past either. We’re safe. You and Ronan are always safe.”

“Sorry if I scared you.”

I smile softly, “You did scare me. I was worried that you were upset about something and you tried to sleep it off. Then I was worried that you were hurt.”

“Just my dumb brain.”

“It’s not dumb,” I say, kissing her temple. “You’re just feeling some anxiety.”

She furrows her brow, “Why would I be dreaming about you leaving me then?”

“I think it’s just a way for your mind to process your emotions. I’m no doctor, but my guess is that you’re having some anxiety about a certain someone. Maybe it just manifested as me since…well, we’re kind of joined at the hip.”

She looks down, then after a few moments, she sniffles as she start to cry harder, “I don’t want Logan to move out.”

I figured as much. When we went to look at the apartments, she just didn’t seem very interested. She feigned excitement around Logan, but I could tell part of her was sad. I knew in the car that she wasn’t feeling good about it anymore.

“I just feel like he’s really starting to thrive here and everything is much better for him now,” she says, and I nod, “We’ve taken him under our wing and I don’t want to…I don’t want to lose contact with him.”

Rubbing her back, I nod my head. It’s not like I haven’t thought about this as well. Of course I don’t want to lose contact with Logan. He’s a really great kid and I will admit, I enjoy having him here, especially knowing the hell he was living through at home with his parents. We’ve given him a soft place to land.

“I know he wants to move. I know he wants a place for himself.” she says, then she rubs her hands over her eyes, “I’m just going to miss him.”

“I’m gonna miss him too, and I’m sure he’ll miss you,” I say, looking over at her, “But I don’t think he’ll cut off contact. He doesn’t have parents to talk to but he has us. We’re always going to be here for him. He knows that. We’ll still invite him over for dinner, he’ll still be around for family nights in the backyard. He works with Jimmy. I’m sure we’ll still see him plenty.”

She looks over at me and grimaces, “I said I liked that one apartment the most because it’s closer to us. How terrible am I?”

“Not terrible.” I shake my head, then I laugh, “Can you imagine when it’s Ronan?”

“Oh god!” she says, shaking her head, “Don’t even want to think about it!”

I laugh and look over at her, holding her gaze for a few moments, “Do you feel better?”

“Yes,” she nods, “I’m also very tired and want to go back to bed.”

“I don’t mind sitting up and easing your mind though.”

She smiles, “Thank you, baby. I truly appreciated it.”

After taking another sip of her tea and offering some to me, she sets it aside and scoots down in bed while I turn off the light. I open my arms and smile when she settles against my chest, and I kiss her forehead before closing my eyes.

“Hey John,” she whispers, and I hum in response, “You’re never going to fall in love with someone else, are you?”

“Absolutely not,” I say as we squeeze each other. “How about you? You’re not gonna fall in love with someone else, are you?”

She scoffs, “No one else exists in my world but you.”

“You put it into words.” I say, which makes her laugh. “That’s how I feel.”

“Sure, other people exist and I can see an attractive person and know they’re attractive but I’m not attracted to them.” she says, and I nod, “Does that make sense?”

I nod, “Yeah, exactly.”

“I genuinely have not felt any sort of attraction to someone else since you came into my life,” she whispers and I smile, nodding my head in agreement, “I don’t think you truly realize how much I love you and how often you’re on my mind.”

Usually I say this stuff to her and she says it in return, but I will admit it’s kind of nice hearing her say it first.

“And by ‘often’, I literally mean constantly. You and Ronan are always my first thought. The first thing I think about when I wake up, the last thing I think about before I go to bed,” she turns and faces me, “Some people would say I’m incredibly obsessed but I don’t even care. I am so obsessed with you--in a healthy way, of course! I’m not following you around and being weird about it though.”

I laugh, “You could follow me around, I don’t mind. I like when you’re clingy.”

She laughs with her lips pressed to mine, “Like you said earlier, joined at the hip. I love you. I love you more than anything in this world.”

“I love you just the same.” I whisper, and she leans up to kiss me again.

We spend the rest of the night tangled up in each other, clinging desperately and not wanting to let go. I know that this feeling will never get old. We are each other's constant, each other's home. And as long as we have that, nothing else really matters.

I still hate her dream version of me though.

__

Seeing as she didn’t have the most peaceful sleep, Y/N slept in a little later than usual. I got Ronan up, then I started making some breakfast. Just as I was about to go get Y/N, she came into the kitchen with a fresh face and a wide smile. I took a step back to look at her, then I pulled her into my arms before gesturing to the kitchen table where I had already put some pancakes and bacon. Now she’s tearing up a pancake and placing it in front of Ronan to eat.

She looks over her shoulder at me and smiles, “Good morning.”

“Good morning, peach,” I say, and she blushes. I walk over and kiss the top of her head a few times before she tilts her head back to look at me, “How did you end up sleeping?”

“Better after our talk,” she hands a piece of pancake to Ronan and turns to look at me, “Thank you.”

I smile, cupping her face, “Of course, baby. You can wake me up anytime to talk.”

Y/N scoffs, “Yeah, no, you’ll be a grump!”

“I’m not a grump today.” I say, and she shakes her head as she smiles. I lean down and whisper in her ear, “You can wake me up anytime for anything.”

“Anything?”

I certainly didn’t mean it that way, but when she cocks up her brow, I laugh.

I smirk, “Yeah, anything.”

“I’ll remember that for next time,” she says, then she gets up and smiles when Logan comes into the kitchen, “Good morning.”

“Morning.”

I squeeze Ronan’s chubby cheeks before turning to Logan, “What’s on the agenda for you today?”

“I guess just looking over the details of the apartments,” he says, and I look at Y/N before looking at him.

“Which one did you end up liking the most?” she asks, glancing over at me. She smiles softly when our eyes meet, and she nods, letting me know that she’s okay.

Logan sits at the table and exhales, “I liked the last one we went to the most. It’s a really great location and the price isn’t too bad. I know you guys said you’d help me out for a few months, but I think I should try my best to do this on my own.”

“I really liked that apartment. The living room was pretty nice,” she says, and I smile to myself.

I know her, so I know she won’t try to persuade him to choose it if he doesn’t want to. She’s just happy that he’d be closer.

The apartment that he’s talking about was a second floor walk-up. It’s located above a Realtor's office. There was another one we looked at a few doors down but it was above a nail salon. Even in the apartment we could smell the acetone and nail polish. He decided he didn’t want to choose that one and we understood why. When we looked at the other, he really liked it since the living room was big. He said it would be nice to have people over since the living room could fit more people.

“And the appliances were more modern.” I say, and he nods. “That’s a bonus.”

“There’s a ton of legal stuff that I’ll have to go over, but I don’t know much about that. Maybe it would be a good idea to talk to my dad again.”

I clench my jaw at the thought as I sit down, “I’ll help you. No need to call him.”

Logan inhales as he looks across the table at me, “Thanks.”

“We will do whatever we have to do,” Y/N says, smiling at him, “If you ever need anything, anything at all, just call us. We’ll always be here.”

I laugh and reach over for her hand, “He knows that.”

“I’m just saying! We don’t want you out of our lives. We don’t even want you out of the house if you’re not ready!”

Logan smiles but it doesn’t reach his eyes, “I just want to give you your space back.”

How he says it doesn’t sit right with me. Something isn’t right.

“We don’t care about that, Logan. Seriously, if you’re not ready, don’t leave.” she says, and I rub her back when she tears up, “If you’re ready, we’ll be right by your side to help you, but if you’re not, then don’t leave. We have plenty of room here. It’s certainly not crowded. Look at this house: it’s huge!”

Logan is quiet for a few moments as he puts his head down, then he sniffles a little and looks at us, “I’ve never had…real parents. I mean, obviously, I did, but they didn’t care about me. They didn’t take any interest in me at all. They put me in sports when I was younger just to keep me busy, but they never even came to a game. I joined band in high school, thinking if I got good at the drums, my dad would finally notice me and…love me, but he still didn’t care. Actually, he told me that he would have been more interested if I played the guitar instead. I doubt that was true. At that point, I just dropped out of band. They were pissed, of course, and didn’t understand why I quit. Anyway, they never cared. No one has ever cared until you two. It’s probably selfish of me to want to stay.”

“We do care,” Y/N says, wiping tears off her cheeks, “We truly do. And it is not selfish to want to stay here.”

“If I’m completely honest, I don’t…I don’t think I’m ready.” he says, and I nod my head when he looks at me, “If you guys really want me out, I will leave--”

I shake my head, “Stop worrying about it, kid. We really don’t mind.”

“I just thought that if I worked for a few more months on this big job Jimmy got us, I’ll have the money to be able to move out and not have to worry about money. We get a huge bonus when it’s done,” Logan says, and I look over at Y/N who is practically crying. “Is it okay with you two if I just stay a few more months?”

“Of course,” I say since Y/N is crying. “Clearly she’s okay with it too.”

She laughs as I hand her a napkin to dry her eyes, “Sorry! It’s just…you’re really important to us and you’re family now. At the end of the day, it’s not up to me and John whether you stay here or not, and I certainly don’t want you to feel obligated to stay because of me, but I also don’t want you to feel obligated to leave either. Truly either way, we will support you.”

Logan laughs when Y/N rolls her eyes and starts to cry again, “I think I should stay a little while longer. It’s nice to feel at home somewhere. Not sure I’m ready to live alone.”

After being so alone as a child and teen, I’m sure he loves living here--I can relate. We’re always home, and we’re always doing something whether it’s a dinner, a pool party, or a bonfire. This house is so full of love, I wouldn’t want to leave either. I don’t blame him one bit. One of the reasons I love this family so much is because of how often we all get together. It’s nice to be surrounded by all that love.

“John, you’re okay with this, right?”

I look at him and laugh, “Of course. I don’t blame you for wanting to stay. Before she moved in, this house was so empty. I hated it. I didn’t know that this house could feel so…”

“Full of love,” she says teasingly, and I nod.

“Yeah, and after not having anywhere to call home for a long time including in this house, it was nice to finally feel at home somewhere. Even when I did live here alone, it didn’t feel the way it does now. This is my home and it’s yours too. You can stay as long as you want.”

Logan looks at us but he’s still not saying something. I furrow my brow a little when he looks at me in hopes he’ll say what’s on his mind.

“Uh,” he clears his throat, “I also just don’t think I’d be safe on my own either.”

I immediately feel anger course through me, “Has Greg contacted you at all?”

“No,” he shakes his head, “He doesn’t know my number and I highly doubt he’d ever try to come here, but I don’t want him to know where I’m living when I do move. Everything is still so fresh. I think if I give it a little more time, he’d calm down and just forget about everything.”

“You’re safe here,” Y/N says to Logan before smiling at me, “John will always make sure of that.”

I nod, “No one is ever going to get into this house without my permission. Neither of you should ever feel unsafe here.”

Y/N smiles softly when I look at her, then she squeezes my hand, “We know.”

The house gets locked up like fortress at night. I didn’t have a security system before Y/N moved in, but when she did, I immediately got the top of the line security systems. I even said I’d hire someone to just stand guard and make rounds, but of course, Y/N hated the idea and said she certainly wasn’t worth all the fuss. I disagree. I vehemently disagree. And the last person that ever tried to get into this house is rotting in the ground with two bullets in his head.

Logan smiles, “Thank you for everything.”

“No need to thank us,” she says, reaching over to touch his hand.

Ronan squeals loudly as she offers up pieces of eggs and pancakes to everyone, and Y/N leans over and takes a piece of pancake.

“Do you want Logan to stay too?” Y/N asks, and Ronan squeals in delight, showing off her teeth as she smiles, “Yeah! You love your buddy, don’t you?”

Logan leans over and ruffles Ronan’s hair, “I’m not going anywhere yet.”

I reach over and rub Y/N’s back, and she looks at me. We share a knowing look, and she shrugs a little when I smile at her. She’s too damn cute. And such a mom.

I lean over and kiss her cheek, “You’re a good mom.”

“Yeah,” Logan nods as he looks at her, “You really are.”

“Isn’t she, Ro?” I say, nodding my head.

Ronan nods her head, “Yea!”

Y/N throws her hands up and tilts her head back as she cries, “What the hell?”

I laugh as I look over at Logan, but he raises his brows and nods to me.

“You’re a good dad too.” he says, shrugging a little, “Thanks…for being my parents when mine refused to be.”

“Yeah, I gotta…” Y/N sniffles as she gets up, “I gotta leave the room. I’m gonna fucking sob.”

I have to admit, my eyes are growing a little glassy. I see so much of myself in Logan and I’m so glad that we’re able to be here for him. I’m glad that things ended up working out in his favor in the end.

“Logan, I don’t know if I’ve ever told you this--well, I know I haven’t. I don’t tell many people,” Y/N says, and I look at her as she sniffles, “I had a really shitty dad too.”

Logan scrunches his brows, “But…you two have such a good relationship now.”

“That’s Dan. He’s actually my step-dad, but my mom and him have been together since I was 12. So, he’s ‘dad’ now. He stepped up when my biological dad didn’t. We don’t share the same blood but in our family, that stuff doesn’t matter. Tess isn’t biologically my sister either, but see? We don’t care about that. We’re family, no matter how we became family.”

“What happened to your biological dad?”

“I don’t know. I don’t talk to him. He didn’t want anything to do with me once I was born. He even told my mom that I ruined his life.” she says, then she looks down for a moment and sighs, “Parents can be so cruel. Just one little comment can stick with you for the rest of your life and just eat away at you. I thought about that comment probably every single day for years. It affected my entire life. It changed the way I saw myself. My dad said it, then years later, I heard those same words uttered by a boyfriend. I just thought I would ruin everybody’s life. It seriously hurt me and damaged my mental health, but I’m so much better now.”

“Because of John?”

Y/N looks at me and smiles, “Yes and no. Yes, because John is incredible and he has never once said I’ve ruined his life. He’s told me many times how much I’ve changed his life for the better. I don’t ever worry that John will say something so cruel. But I realized that I had so many people who loved me and who cared about me. My dad saying that stuff about me eventually didn’t hold as much weight. Why should I care what some coward said about me? He couldn’t even be man enough to stay and help take care of a child he helped create. But you know what? I’m a good person with a good heart. He’s missing out by not having me in his life. Just like your parents are missing out on such a smart, sweet kid. They’ll regret it one day.”

Logan shrugs, “Maybe.”

“They will,” she says, nodding her head. “But until that day and even after, John and I will there for you. For anything and everything. If you need to talk to someone, we’re always here. If you need to talk about shitty dads, I’m here. I have stories.”

I look at her, “I want to know stories!”

“You don’t have a complicated relationship with your dad--” she stops and points her finger, “Never mind. You don’t even have parents. I take that back.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” I tease, nudging her chin. Logan furrows his brow in confusion, and I laugh, “We’d need about a week to unpack everything with me.”

Y/N smiles, “You have my parents now. Oh my god! My parents are to you what we are for Logan! I’m gonna cry again!”

“I’ve made her cry enough for today.” Logan says, gathering his plate and cup, “Daniela and I are going out today, so I better go get ready.”

I watch Logan as he walks past Y/N, but she stops in front of him and reaches out to hug him. He closes his eyes as he hugs her back, holding tight to her.

“Thanks for everything.”

“No need to thank us,” she says, then she cups his face, “We’re proud to be your parents. Even if it’s only temporary.”

Logan laughs, “I hope you don’t think it’s temporary.”

“I don’t,” she admits as she laughs, “We’ll happily be your mom and dad.”

“Cool.” Logan hugs her again and nods at me, then he retreats to his room.

Y/N puts her hands over her face as she cries, so I get up and get Ronan out of her highchair since she’s looking at her mom. She runs over to her on her tiptoes and tugs at her sweater, then she reaches up for her. Y/N lifts her into her arms and cradles the back of her head, pressing kisses to her cheek as she looks at me. I smile softly and wrap my arms around both of them.

“I hope he’s not doing this for my sake.”

I shake my head, “I don’t think so. Something tells me he’s just not ready to leave all this behind. I don’t blame him.”

“Do you want him to leave?” she asks, and I lean back to look at her for a few moments. “Be honest.”

I really don’t. I genuinely like having him here.

After a few seconds, I exhale sharply, “No. I don’t want him to leave. I don’t think he’s ready. I don’t think we are either.”

A smile spreads on her face, “You love being his dad, don’t you?”

“I just love being a dad,” I whisper, reaching over to smooth Ronan’s hair back, “But having him around does make me feel like I’ll be more prepared when this one is his age.”

Ronan reaches for me, so I take her and hug her tight. Y/N wraps her arms around my waist and leans her head against my chest. I look over the top of Y/N’s head and see Logan in the doorway.

“Sorry to interrupt, just wanted to let you all know I’m headed out for a bit.” he says, and Y/N smiles. “I’ll be home in time for dinner.”

“Daniela is welcome to join us.”

Logan nods, “Cool. I’ll let her know. I think she probably will.”

Y/N perks up, “Seriously?”

“Yeah, she likes you. She says you’re pretty and she always likes your nails. I don’t know what that means.” he says, and she holds up her hand to show off her colorful nails. “Oh.”

“Oh my gosh, tell her that when she comes over tonight, we can talk all about nails and oh my god! We can even plan a girls night! Tess is so good at nails and she can even do them!” she says as she walks around to gather plates on the table, “Oh my god! Tell her that we can have a girls night and she can stay here, I mean, she can stay with you but you boys can go out and us girls can stay here! Ah, this is so exciting!”

I haven’t seen her this excited about something in a while. I have to admit it’s fucking adorable.

Logan laughs, “I’ll let her know. I’m sure she’ll be excited.”

“But I mean, play it cool when you tell her.” she says, trying her best to seem calm, and I stiffle a laugh. “Shut up, John! She likes me!”

I put my one hand up in defense since I’m holding Ronan, “I’m not saying anything.”

Y/N smiles at Logan, “Have fun, sweetheart.”

“I will. Be home later.” he says, waving at us as he backs out of the kitchen.

I look over at her and smile, and she rolls her eyes.

“I’m cool, okay?”

“Never said you weren’t,” I kiss her temple, “I think you’re pretty cool.”

She tilts her head back and smiles at me, “You’re pretty cool too. Don’t pretend you didn’t notice Logan perk up when I suggested a boys night.”

“Probably just because Jimmy will be there.”

“Don’t do that,” she says, and I look at her, “He likes you, John. You’re the only father figure he’s really ever had.”

I smile as I look at her, my nose burning a little as I nod, “Yeah, you’re right.”

“God, you’re adorable.”

__

We decided to just go out to eat tonight instead of trying to make something. Y/N fell asleep shortly after lunch since her sleep was a little interrupted last night, and I smile as I watched my girls snuggle on the couch, both fast asleep and clinging to each other. When Logan got home later with Daniela, Y/N tried to play it as cool as possible since she knows that Daniela likes her, but she just giggled and pulled her up to the wardrobe room to show her all her nail polish.

My sweet peach is always so worried about if Ronan will like her when she’s a teenager, but I don’t think she’ll have a problem. Daniela is 19, but she really likes Y/N. The two of them just went to the bathroom since we just got done eating dinner, then they want to go to the bookstore in the mall. They’re attached at the hip.

I’m sitting on a bench waiting for them to come back while Logan holds Ronan up to look into an fish tank. There’s an aquarium under the mall that we’re at and I just know she wants to go. If she does, I’m sure we’d all be fine to go through it.

I look over when I see someone walk up to Logan and say something, and they shake hands. The guy gestures to Ronan, but Logan looks at me and points. I get up and walk over since I don’t want anyone hassling him but when I get closer, I see that this is clearly someone he went to school with.

“Yeah, man, it’s been a while. What have you been up to?”

Logan shrugs, “Just working. I work for a carpentry company.”

“Sick,” the kids nods, then he looks at me.

“Oh, this is John,” Logan says, then he looks over my shoulder, “And this is Y/N. Ronan is their daughter. This is Will.”

Will looks at us and is clearly wondering who the hell we are. Y/N smiles when Logan looks at her, nodding her head encouragingly.

“They’re kind of like my adoptive parents.” he says, and Will looks at us before looking at Logan, “I moved out of my parents place.”

“Yeah, your dad was a dick.”

Logan laughs, “He is. Anyway, I’m living with them. You remember Daniela, right?”

Daniela smiles, giving Logan’s friend a wave, “Hey.”

“Hey,” Will smiles, then looks at Logan, “You still play the drums, right?”

Logan shrugs, “A little rusty, but yeah.”

Will smiles, “Dude, we gotta get together and play sometime.”

“Sounds good.”

I take Ronan from him when the two exchange numbers, and I walk over to show Ronan the fish tank again. She points at a blue fish and gasps, looking at me with wide eyes.

“What is that?”

“Fish,” she says, which sounds more like ‘fich’, but she’s the smartest girl ever so I kiss her cheek. “Momma, fish!”

Y/N smiles as she stands next to me, “I see! Where is the red fish?”

Ronan looks around the tank and follows the red fish with her finger, then she looks at her mom.

“Good job. You’re such a clever girl!” she says, kissing her cheek.

“The smartest bug,” I say, bouncing her a little.

Ronan kicks her legs since she wants to walk, so I set her down and keep a close eye on her. She just runs over to Daniela and grins when she looks down at her. When she first met Daniela, she kept saying something about the movie Brave. It took us a few minutes to realize she meant Merida since Daniela says unruly curly red hair. Daniela finds it funny and even quotes the movie to Ronan, which she absolutely loves. She gets a kick out of the accent Daniela does too.

“Thanks for dinner,” Y/N says, and I look down at her, “It was nice. It’s nice that Logan brought Daniela along too.”

“She likes you a lot.” I say, and she smiles up at me, “All of Ronan’s friends will probably want to hang out with you too when she’s older.”

She scoffs, “Highly doubtful.”

I look over at Ronan as she inches closer to the aquarium entrance. She tilts her head back to look at the sign, then she looks over at me. I raise my brows and smile at her, and she giggles before taking off. Y/N laughs and rushes after her, scooping her into arms.

“What do you think you’re doing, little bug?” she says, tickling her tummy.

“Fish!” Ronan screams, pointing at the entrance.

Y/N laughs as she sets her down, then she kneels down behind her, still keeping a grip on her, “Should we go? Yeah? We should go ask daddy.”

I smile when they look over at me. The little dimple in their right cheeks form as they smile at me, and I shake my head and laugh as I walk over to them.

I’m always told how much Ronan looks like me, but when she smiles, all I see is her gorgeous mom. My beautiful girls.

Logan kneels down, “Are we gonna go see fish?”

“Yeah!” Ronan smiles, wrapping her arms around his neck so he’ll pick her up.

I reach down and help Y/N up, wrapping my arm around her waist, “You look beautiful tonight, sweetheart.”

“Thank you!” she gives me a chaste kiss, but it’s not good enough, so I pull her back and kiss her again. She laughs as she looks at me, “You’re my favorite person in the world.”

“Likewise,” I say, and she grins and wraps her arms around me. “Should we go look at some ‘fich’?”

Y/N laughs as she looks over at Ronan, who is pointing out all of the fish to Daniela and Logan. Ronan looks over Logan’s shoulder and calls out for us, so I hold Y/N’s hand and follow behind into the aquarium.

__

The living room looks particularly nice tonight. It’s cloudy and rain is on the way, so it’s much darker for this time of the day, but there are some candles burning on the coffee table--this is how I know Ronan is down for a nap. I just came up from the basement to get a drink but when I see Y/N curled up on the couch, I smile and walk over to her.

“Nice sweatshirt.”

She looks down at my dark blue sweatshirt she’s wearing and smiles, “It’s cozy and smells like you.”

“You’re adorable,” I say, sitting down next to her. She immediately scoots over and leans her head against my shoulder while our fingers interlace.

Y/N chuckles quietly to herself, “Do you remember our second date? I don’t know what made me think of it, but I just remember on the way home you brushed your hand against my boob and tried to kiss me. ”

“Oh, yeah, the date where you lied to me and told me that you had a brother. Yes, I remember.” I say, and she bursts out laughing. “Why the hell did you lie and say that?”

“I thought it would scare you!”

I shake my head and laugh, “Telling me that Tess was your sister scared me plenty.”

“Hey!” she playfully swats me as she sits up to look at me, “You love Tess.”

“Yeah, she doesn’t need to know that though.” I tease, then I hear someone snort from behind me. I look at Y/N and close my eyes, inhaling deeply, “She’s behind me.”

Y/N is smiling when I open my eyes, “She is.”

“She loves you too, John.” Tess says as she walks over to sit in the chair, “But don’t worry, we don’t have to be mushy about it.”

I let out a small laugh, “Well, that’s good.”

“Jimmy is at home if you’re bored.”

“Nah, I was just working on some orders that I have.” I say as I reach for Y/N’s drink.

Tess nods, “Yeah, Jimmy is showing Logan some new tools or something. I don’t know, as soon as he mentions tools, I zone out. If it’s his actual work or a job, of course I listen, but if it’s some metal doohickey, I just zone out. He does the same when I mention nail polish, so we’re even. At least he listens when I talk about photography.”

“Because that’s your passion,” I say, and Tess looks at me, “Of course he’s going to listen when you talk about something you love and you’re passionate about. He talks about how proud he is all the time when it comes to your photography. He’s also really looking forward to getting your studio all designed. We were actually talking about that the other night. I’m going to help out.”

Y/N grins when I look at her, “Okay, you’re adorable.”

I playfully nudge her before I lean over to kiss the top of her head, “On second thought, I will go over and see what they’re up to.”

“He heard Logan was there and now he wants to go over,” Y/N says, completely blowing my cover. She smiles when I look at her, “It’s cute.”

Tess smiles, “Don’t worry, John, you’re still dad. Jimmy is just the cool uncle.”

I let out a small laugh as I get Bleu’s leash and whistle for him. He quickly comes out of Ronan’s room and rushes downstairs where he briefly stops to say hi to his mom and Tess, then he comes over to me and sits.

“You are the cool dad, baby,” Y/N says, and I smile at her. “Have fun.”

I give them both a wave and laugh when I hear them giggling.

__

“Excuse you…” I say as Y/N laughs from her side of the bed, “That text was rude.”

“It wasn’t!”

I smile as I walk over to her, giving her a quick kiss, “Let me just wash up and say goodnight to Ro.”

Y/N smiles, “Okay, fine.”

While I was over at Jimmy’s house, Y/N had texted me, still poking fun at me about the whole dad thing. She basically said if I wanted to be a husband that I should come home. Of course I want to be a husband, and of course I knew she was joking. I just got caught up talking with Jimmy about plans for Tess’ studio. I look forward to helping him since he helped out so much when we bought the bookshop.

“Okay, my little wifey,” I say as I walk past, “Let me just say goodnight to our daughter, then you have my undivided attention.”

“You promise?” she playfully pouts, and I nod my head, “Okay good.”

I smile at her before I walk down to Ronan’s room. She’s fast asleep with Bleu by her side, and he perks up and wags his tail when I walk in. I lean down and pet him a few times, then I kiss Ronan’s cheek.

“Goodnight, baby girl.” I whisper, smiling when she scrunches her face up a little.

Before going back to bed, I quickly check all the doors to make sure they’re locked--Logan is out with friends and will be home later, but he has a key and he knows the alarm code. I set the alarm and scan the yard for a few moments. I know Peter isn’t out there, but there’s still a part of me that gets paranoid. When I don’t see anything or anyone, I head back upstairs.

“Set the alarm since Logan is out with some friends, but he knows the code, so I’m not--” I stop in place and smile as I look over at my wife as she stands at the foot of the bed in the most delicious pink lingerie I’ve ever seen. I immediately reach back and shut our bedroom door, locking it for good measure. “What’s this?”

“Well,” she fixes the stockings and garter belt before looking at me, “I had this old thing laying around, so I figured…”

I shake my head, pointing at her, “No, this is new. I’ve seen everything you’ve worn in that drawer, and I know this is new.”

“Okay, so maybe I bought it the other day,” she says, walking over to me. She’s wearing high heels too, so she’s a bit taller. She wraps her arms around my neck and smiles when I rest my hands on her hips, “I thought it would be a nice thing to surprise you with.”

I smile, “It’s a very nice thing.”

“Do you like this color?” she asks as she moves past to do a spin, “I thought it was something different.”

“I do like it,” I say, then I put my hand up to stop her when she spins again. She stands with her back to me and laughs when I reach down and grab a handful of her ass. “I love it.”

Y/N laughs when I pull her into my arms and press against her backside, “I can feel that.”

I press a kiss to her shoulder and up her neck, but she moves out of my grasp before I can go anywhere else. She walks over to her nightstand and opens the drawer, then she turns around and looks at me as she holds up her vibrator.

“You know that game that’s like, ‘I’m going on a picnic and I’m bringing this’, and people say what they’re bringing and you can’t say the same thing?” she asks, and I furrow my brow and nod. “Well, I’m going to have sex with you, and I’m bringing this.”

I smile when she holds up the vibrator. She gestures to me since it’s my turn now. I hum as I think, slowly walking towards her.

“I don’t know, I have a few things I can bring.” I say, and she laughs as she looks down at the bulge in my pants. “Yes, I’m definitely bringing that.”

“Good,” she says softly, tilting her head back to kiss me. Her hand finds its way to the front of my pants and she begins to slowly rub where I’m throbbing for her. “What else are you bringing?”

I lean back to look at her, then I reach for the pillow on the bed, “This.”

Y/N furrows her brow, then she laughs, “I sure am a pillow princess.”

“No, this isn’t for your head,” I lean down and brush my lips against her, and she lets out a small whimper.

“What’s it for then?”

I smirk, “It’s for your mouth.”

“Ooh,” she returns the smirk and nods. “You gonna make me scream tonight?”

“I am,” I nod, and she lets out a laugh when I quickly grab her in my arms and lay her on the bed. I kiss her deeply as I reach down to remove her shoes, then I toss them to the ground and begin to kiss down her throat, down the valley between her breasts, past her stomach, and I settle between her legs.

Y/N leans up to watch as I lap between her legs, and I smile when she immediately reaches for the pillow and puts it over her face. As soon as I suck on her clit, I hear her let out a loud moan.

“That’s my girl,” I say against her thigh, and I laugh when she moans again. “Good girl…”

All I can hear is Y/N’s panting muffled by the pillow, and I pull her closer to my mouth before closing my eyes and diving in deeper.

__

@beingnerdyissupercool

@sakurachan-9

@spiderfangirl22

@im--blushing

@ruby-octo

@sunnythebunny7

@livetosing21

@lilithlinen

@ladyren33

@multifandombliss

@tnu-ree

@scream-queen-25

[perilegs]

my sweet little baby man is no longer with us

[strawglicks]

People are already whining abt the flag on grahams plushie be for real 💀

[steeltwigz]

Saw a post abt the Sonic movies that was like "plz filter negativity posts better" which is GOOD AND TRUE you should be doing that. Ok. But then they kept going to imply that the criticisms of the Sonic movies are all entirely Personal and Ignorable and not like. Usually abt the horrific copaganda, misogynistic writing, and Paramount's disgusting zionism.... Guys a lot of ppls problem w the Knuckles show wasn't JUST a bastardization of Knuckles' character or thinking Wade was annoying or whatever, but like was focused on the grotesque Zionist message from that one episode 😭😭😭 you can enjoy something and still recognize that it has intrinsic and huge glaring flaws and talk abt them. I think actually you Should be speaking up abt the misogyny, zionism and propaganda the SCU supports and discusses, ESPECIALLY if you like the movies! Its important to be able to recognize these things in media and admit that even media you personally enjoy can be deeply problematic, instead of hiding it away and pretending those HUGE FLAWS aren't issues actually....

[todayisafridaynight]

seeing info only about the kiryu and majima statuettes but absolute radio silence on the ichi one is utterly sending me. Theyre hiding the fact theyre gonna make ichi pale as a cracker again

[floral-hex]

so tired of feeling sick all of the time. I’m in the middle of moving, this time to an upstairs apartment, and just carrying one box up the stairs kills me 😰

[makerofmadness]

ok I know I said I love dark cacao but like they didn't have to make two of him /j

(I'm sorry what the fzck is going on with kingdom right now like. I thought my friend was kidding when they said "ancient+" I thought it was a joke about Mystic Flour like what the fudge do you MEAN someone actually signed off on that-)

(I feel like I caused this somehow 😭 like I think I said once on here that cacao's my favorite out of the ancients but I didn't like to actually USE him but like. why not just buff him???? Or like they were doing that whole crystal jam thing and I know that was kinda only for the legendaries but like. it's something-)

[obnoxiousarcade]

im thinking again

[wild-at-mind]

I'm still cranky about the advice column where a pair of friends drifted apart due to pandemic + the writing in friend having had a baby, which resulted in the writing in friend not being able to be there for the other friend as during bereavement as much as they should have been. The writing in friend was white and the other friend was black so the advice columnist did a lot of privilege dynamics talk, but completely failed to acknowledge how much work a new baby is a single time.