#oh meat sticks
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kandidandi · 2 years ago
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I like slim jims *slowly goes cross eye*
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never had a slim jim before but i trust you
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b4kuch1n · 1 year ago
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pre-marination doobles. dont ask me questions
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nyaawn · 11 months ago
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FFVII (1997) -> FFVII Rebirth (2024)
Promotional Art update: Yuffie / Cait Sith & Moogle
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icewindandboringhorror · 3 months ago
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It always seems a bit unbalanced on The Great Food Truck Race when there will be multiple teams who are cooking a wide variety of complex dishes with 10 different components and a bunch of prep work, and then there's that one team who like... exclusively serves plain crepes with some premade nutella on them, or plain waffles with just some whipped cream and cut up strawberries lol...
#AND then they'll be the winning team or whatever and its like... wow... imagine that... I wonder how its possible that they can get#more dishes out faster than the other teams... hrrmm.... lol#Not that they aren't still doing work like. obviously it's still hard and there's still a sales component and other stuff to be done#but It's just kind of unbalanced seeming when one group is serving like grilled shrimp sandwich with 3 homemade sauces and a#slaw and two sides and the other people are like... slicing fruit and drizzling a bottle of hersheys chocolate syrup on top of some thing#they just threw in a waffle maker for a few minutes#You see the footage of the teams cooking and everyone is like prepping a ton of different things and meat and vegetables and they have#boiling pots and pans and fryers going and tossing stuff in bowls and compiling these multi component dishes#and then That One Team is always just casually slicing bananas or doing some whipped cream in a bowl gbjhbhj#They usually dont even make their own caramel or chocolate sauces or anything. Nutella out of a jar babey!#So all you're really Making is like... whipped cream. and some sort of batter (waffle. crepe. etc)#If I got placed in a competition like that and I found out one of my opponents just sold waffles or pancake sticks or etc#like that I would just be like... okay.. I'm out then. bye. OR I would pivot and be like.. right I shall remove all complexity from my menu#whatsoever and just start selling plain balls of fried dough with powdered sugar or plain fries with nothing on them or something lol#update: OH my god.. one of these teams on a newer season is selling a 'bonus add on' where you can add#cinnamon sugar and caramel syrup (possibly not even home made by them???? just from a bottle) for $5 extra on your order#If I bought a $12 waffle from a food truck and they were like 'hey do you want to upgrade? for only $5 we'll drizzle a teaspoon#of caramel and sprinkle a little sugar and cinnamon on there!' I feel like I would cancel my order and walk away.#that is a $1 add on at MOST.. for a freaking DRIZZLE of caramel sauce LOL#and of course this team is in the top 3... squirrel.... come ON...#Which I know all these shows are fake and bad and whatever. I dont watch them seriously. I think I liked the first few seasons#but then anything past like season 4 (or whenever they started having established people who already ran food trucks on there#instead of taking a bunch of peope who had never run a food truck before and giving them one - which is a much more equal footing#premise to me) I have just been increasingly annoyed at and I really just have the show on for background noise#whilst doing chores or something and am not genuinely paying that much attention but... my god.. At least try to pretend its fair lol#WHICH I KNOWW... you can say 'well the other teams could do similar if they wanted.' or blah blah. tehcnically it's THEIR choice to#make stuff from scratch and not sell a bunch of packaged frozen chicken wings dropped into a fryer over a shitty 6min waffle or etc.#but... I will never respect a $5 for 1tbsp of caramel sauce type of situation.. even if they win.. you will always be losers in my heart#So many teams with real cooking skill & good concepts go home to the 'slap nutella on fried dough' people... how...
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flamesfrenzied · 4 months ago
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Have come to the conclusion that I don't want just matched freak. I want freak that is surpassed. Freak that is obliterated. Freak that is blown out of the fucking water
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galaxycunt · 9 months ago
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I think the funniest thing about lent is the vague memory I had in elementary school in the lunch line it was cheeseburger Friday and I was like ummm is there anything else it’s Friday and like the lunch lady was like uhhhh and three kids behind me were like yeah same we can’t eat that so they had to go heat up a bunch of bean burritos
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gongedtornado · 1 year ago
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help girl i got too silly <\3 (overthought every interaction ever)
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cockandballsnurture · 1 year ago
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i have a crush on this dude at work and i never say anything to him
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mothbeasts · 1 year ago
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okay cleaver in dst would be interesting too i think personally. Something something can couriers survive HELL. cleaver voice ummm i dont think this is the mojave.
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nexus-nebulae · 1 year ago
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new food i can make new food i can make
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notwaitinginthecorner · 2 years ago
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Nails are short but the picking at my fingers is intense once again. Can't wait to NOT be doing this again
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thegreatestheaver · 6 months ago
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(I need a cigarette voice) I need a monster energy
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yourpostisonpinterest · 10 months ago
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@badjokesbyjeff
@lyingnudieonthefloor
i found your post on pinterest!
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gremlingottoosilly · 6 months ago
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Blind!Reader who accidentally bumped hard into Mafia!Konig, hard enough for to Konig thought it's some punk who wants to pick a fight with him but only to find a cute girlie with a walking stick that sprawled on the floor because of the wall of meat he is (feel free to use the "you hurt your ankle!?" excuse for him to take Blind!Reader for his own)
Konig was ready to kill when he felt someone bump into him. A fucker should be blind not to notice this wall of muscles and bottled anger coming his way - and Konig sure as hell would make them blind if they are dumb enough not to look around when they are walking. His hand goes to grasp his gun - an instinct, in case the fucker wasn't just dumb, but an enemy...and then he hears a whimper. Clacking of a stick falling to the ground. Cute whimpers. Female whimpers. The "oh my god, sir, I'm so sorry, I didn't want to bump into you, but they changed the street layout since winter and-" God, you were fucking adorable. Precious. Pretty. Cute. Whimpering like a kitten when he helped you stand up, letting you clutch on his hands as a guiding line. Supported you by your waist while handing you the walking stick - and not letting go of your body even as you were trying to stand up without being wobbly. He knows you're probably fine, you didn't fall that badly, but he grasps for straws in trying to keep you by his side. Apologizes, even, his nervous and anxious self returning for a second as he understands that the situation isn't about possible murder. It's about possibly finding a cute girlfriend. Now, he obviously can't leave you to fend for yourself. Konig doesn't care that you survived on your own and is perfectly fine without him - he also doesn't care that you really hate having him dote over you like you're some helpless creature. He needs you by his side, preferably under him, and the fact you survived for so long on your own actually doesn't say anything - he needs to protect you, even if it means being as overbearing as possible. Even if it means simply picking you up like a lost cat and getting you over his shoulder, squeezing your ass one time before packing you into a dark vehicle. You can calm down by trying to memorize his face through your hands, and he can memorize himself with the curves of your sweet body. God, he is going to enjoy making you his...even if it means locking you up in his mansion so no enemy could use you to get to him.
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rosenclaws · 20 days ago
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ok, ok “suck on my fingers.” and “don’t make a mess, baby.” prompt with the worse wolverine? btw i love your words!!!
warnings: SMUT, MINORS DNI, squirting, fingering, dirty talk, overstimulation, cum eating (kinda? i think thats whats this called idk he just sticks his fingers in ur mouth after fingering)
600 follower drabble masterlist
a/n: I'm gonna be so real I am coping hard rn. I am devastated and worried for the future but if writing wolverine smut is what helps that is what I shall do. I hope you like it!!
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How long has it been? Minutes? Hours? Fuck at this point you'd believe that you've been here for days. Wrapped in his arms. Trapped under his adamantium bone and super human strength. The sheets slip through your fingers as your grip grows weaker. Logan has been teasing you, playing with you like a piece of meat.
Logan is upright against the headboard. He’s got your back against his chest. One of strong arms is keeping you upright. Forcing you to sit there. His other hand is shoved into your panties. He didn’t even bother to take them off.
There’s something playing on the TV in your room but you lost any sense of your surroundings about an hour ago. Logan likes to play with his food. Always has.
Your big hot boyfriend loves to make a mess of things before he eats.
“Oh Fuck Logannnn.” You whine as he slips two of his fingers into your already soaked cunt.
Your panties are soaked from Logan’s touch. He won’t even bother taking them off. He likes the obscene sight of his hands down them. Loves seeing his fingers disappear and watch your cute face scrunch up in pleasure.
You’re trying with all your might to squirm away. Not that you wanted him to stop but the pleasure was overwhelming. Your body was moving without your brain at this point. Pure instinct. Logan growls in your ear. Shoving another finger inside to shut you up.
“Quiet. I’m not done with you yet.” You tilt your neck to the side as Logan’s rough thumb starts to circle your clit harshly.
The sounds of your pleasure are loud and Logan is unashamedly eating them up. His fingers movie faster and faster. Pounding into you with a force that makes you scream. Your dripping down his hands and onto the sheets. Logan tuts and shakes his head mockingly.
“Don’t make a mess baby.” He scolds as he drives his fucking fingers deep inside of you. Fucking liar. He loves when you make a mess. Nothing boosts his ego more.
He feels so good. His fingers are tearing you apart. He’s hell bent on making you come harder than you ever have. He can never get enough. It's like a competition with himself. Making sure you know only he can do this to you over and over. A pressure builds deep in your core and your eyes widen when you feel a certain feeling.
“Logan wait I-“ Your pleas are silenced as another moan rips through your throat.
You chant his name over and over as your legs start to shake. Logan watches in awe as you squirt all over the bed. He doesn't let up as he pulls as much as he can. You're moaning only pushes him further. He's whispering dirty things in your ear but you can barely hear him. Your body is screaming in pure pleasure and its all you can hear.
"Too much." You manage to whimper out as Logan continues to fuck his fingers into you.
He hums and in a moment of mercy decides you've had enough for tonight. Such a good pet. His fingers are coated. He pulls them apart and smirks as he brings them to your lips.
“Come on, suck on my fingers." He coos as you lazily open your mouth. Your perfect pretty lips surrounding his fingers, sucking your own juices from his fingers.
"Taste yourself, see why I can't get enough of this delicious cunt." His eyes grow dark as he watches your lips take his fingers so easily. You look up with glossy eyes. Completely fucked out because of him.
"Cute." He presses a kiss to your forehead and pulls you closer. His fingers slip out of your mouth and he dips back down into your soaked underwear. You whine when he gently brushes over your sensitive clit.
"Shhh sweetheart," His moves are softer this time, gentle.
"Just relax. Let me get my taste too."
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neverendingford · 1 year ago
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#tag talk#the problem with going out and meeting new people to make friends is that so many people are highkey unbearable to be around#they'll fuck up basic scheduling for dates and meetups. they'll flake and message you about it two days later.#literally scheduled a dinner date with some dude and he never showed. texts me an hour later like “sorry I fell asleep” bitch you what?#like. messaging me literally last minute going “hey I've decided to not show up” is better than ghosting.#this isn't the first time something like this has happened. but like. why do people not respect my time.#I try so hard to communicate clearly and be transparent about timeline and schedule and letting people know if something comes up#and I'm not saying I'm better than other people. I'm saying I don't know why other people don't do it too. it feels like the bare minimum.#anyway. my brother was giving me shit for not sticking with friends for more than a few months and like. bro I have good reason.#I'm not going to choose to put in the effort for a relationship with someone if it's constant work on my end and constant let-downs on thei#like. bro I know I'm just some cheap ass to you but I'm still a person so maybe realize that I've put you in my schedule respect that#anyway. not being lonely isn't as easy as meeting new people. you have to actually like the people you meet.#meeting people you hate just entrenches you in the desire to never talk to people ever again.#unrelated. I cooked the best chicken of my life yesterday. milk butter garlic onion and lemon pepper.#crushed and minced garlic. diced onion. milk. butter. lemon pepper. heated in a pan.#then chicken pieces added to sauce in pan for a little bit. then moved to a pan in the oven.#I usually don't like chicken but damn this is genuinely so good. also my parents always cut chicken cross-grain and imo it's harder to eat#I prefer cutting the meat with the grain. idk why but it's so much easier to chew.#oh! pro tip. if you have trouble with milk going bad in the fridge cause you don't use it enough. powdered milk. big adhd tip#I can leave the tin of powdered milk in the pantry for months and then pull it out whenever I need it. no worry about spoiled milk#back to social and people. like. even nice people. I just don't like them anyway. idk why. like. nice polite people. mm too boring#would I like to be able to hold onto friends? sure. is that a reasonable expectation given my track record? no#I wasn't joking when I said I could drop tumblr no problem. it's nice here but relationships are fragile nothing built on air and dust#idk. cursed to a life of eternal loneliness. super fun. don't take this as a call for help. I don't need you to say “I'm sorry you're sad”
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