#oh and dont worry about venting lol

[deathbirby]

Sorry for a bit of venting but god people like Dolphin and Rax really make me hate 3H so much. Which is funny since I actually started off liking the game quite a bit. But now? I cannot separate 3H from the horrendous discourse surrounding it. It’s really soured my opinion on the game and made me look at it in a different light.

The dumb 3H shit also affects other games that aren’t it like Engage, which is a shame since I love Engage and yet it was plagued by controversies— including being constantly compared to 3H and its “brilliant writing”.

Honestly yeah. It's hard for some people to enjoy a game when its fandom has such garbage people in it. It's hard for me to look at Edelgard in a positive light (even in the rare instances I defend her) because of how unhinged her stans are.

And 3H constantly being compared to Engage is just... ugh. They're different games. Different story, setting, world, characters, gameplay, etc. 3H was the exception in FE games, not the norm.

[jessicas-pi]

it's actually, genuinely, honestly hilarious that in a fandom where popular ships include characters who are biologically related, characters with a 10+ year age gap who met when one was a teenager or even a child, and characters who have tried to kill each other, people hate on a friends-to-lovers ship with a <2 year age gap where the characters have a deep emotional bond and plenty of romantic subtext, because "they're siblings". my brother in the force they are literally not.

[polzkadotz]

.

[te001e]

hahaha i can't fucking believe it i am so exhausted with living i hate i hate i hate i hate i'm scared

[xavieremix]

.

[smol-tired-binch-blog]

I do kinda hope we get a sequel, it’d be nice to be able to talk about Lorabetta again

[alilweirddragon]

Me: *is happy and just enjoying shit*

Life: hEy wHy aRe yOu hApPy?? HeReS sOmE bAd sHiT *slaps me in the face with upsetting news*

[superlocrians]

18th october , 2024　 ୨ৎ　9:43 pm

i didn’t study, but that wasn’t on my to-do. today i did my one and only quest, clean my room. i’m glad i did. it took me a ridiculous amount of time considering i only needed to put my clothes in the hampers (don’t judge, i was practicing my accepting a grammy speech.) quests tomorrow include:

• study english 3 for at least one hour

• catch up in reading plan

• complete morning routine and all side quests

• start little women (side quest)

im also filming a “one second of my day” video, where there’s one second clips of each different thing i do in a day. i might post that or i might not. very tired, goodnight now!

- porda

oh my goodness there’s this boy at my job and he’s so pretty but he doesn’t work until next sunday and i don’t work sundays anymore.

tw // calorie counting, mentions of eating disorders, venting

i just looked at the caloric content of the food in the chipotle app and holy @#$%&! no wonder i’ve gained 7 pounds since i’ve worked here. i’ll just pay closer attention to what im eating and it’ll go away in no time.

i will try to pacify my hunger with copious amounts of water. i just wanna lose a bit before the holidays really kick in. but when they do i’ll just only eat poorly at events because i have a weak immune system anyway and get sick quickly when i eat lots of junk. it is upsetting im only 10lbs away from overweight. i dont look big. sigh, just frustrated with myself and my impulsive and practically constant binge eating.

i realized in at my highest weight ever (bmi 23) which is certainly a reality check since i’ve always been in the 16s-19s. i tried to eat healthier today which was sort of a fail, lol? i did follow paleo today. tomorrow at work ill just get a salad with double chicken, salsa, sour cream, and cheese and only drink water. that’ll just be 10.3 carbs and 590 calories. that’ll keep me satiated until the end of my shift.

i don’t want to go back to my old ways of punishing myself with no food and barely eating anything and wanting to look so so thin. i don’t want that anymore. but i worry that now when i try to cut some calories i may fall back into my old disordered ways. sigh. i just pray about this all.

i also feel so lost and confused. i know (i think??) i want to go to college but i feel so insecure. i don’t feel smart. i completely doubt my academic capabilities. i’ve been looking at colleges today. do i want a jazz studies degree, a music education degree, a seminary degree or something completely different???? i don’t know. i feel so lost and confused as i previously stated. i also don’t know if i want to move to my dad’s or stay here. it’s been a topic of conversation—since my siblings are on my dad’s side. i feel so torn in every direction. i wish i could drive but i never want to. i must sleep now. sorry if you read this lol, just my ramblings.

[blueserpent9]

Oh um also.. SORRY hehe i just forgot to mention this in my last question … did you ever get bullied for your age regression?… because i do at my school because some kids found out (also that im a system) and i… idk i dont know anyone else who is a Little and im realy worried im differint you know.. sorry for venting i know u like dont know me lol .. but yea

—🎀🍼🍭🍬🌷🌸💤

So sorta. Kids bullied me for acting like a kid and for being to immature and not fitting in. They never knew (and hopefully never will know) why I act childish randomly. Only about 4 people know and they help me get through the school day without having any meltdowns or being noticed by bullies. So like sorta but they never knew about my regression. and you're fine to vent, I love talking to people! And if you wanna vent more (I'm not great with advice lol) than you can

[stonedstargazer666]

I just did the hardest thing in my life.

Now I'm not sure how to go about talking about something like this.... i'm not all here mentally so just bear with me.... TW: Death, passing of a loved one, and organ donation. self harm mentioned.

I'm in Louisiana… Got here yesterday, everything feels like a blur… yet it feels like it's moving in slow motion…. It feels really good to see my stepmom, and stepsibs and my half brother Bear who came down to Louisiana JUST for me. Bear and our dad didn't really have a relationship, not the way I did with our dad. But Bear came down from Minnesota for me..... and I'm truly grateful for that.

My dad was legally pronounced brain dead on September 3rd 2024. Yesterday, September 4th, 2024. He had his Hero Walk from his ICU room to the ambulance bay…. i feel… I dont know… I've only ever have seen that on like med dramas before.. ya know? There's a place out here were they take him to handle as they put it "His gifts". Because he was an organ donor… I'm so proud of him for that Oh my gods I'm so proud of him for that…. but that walk… seeing all those doctors and nurses staff. some of who are my step moms co workers… it was the hardest thing i have ever done/ had been a part of in my life…. there is already a recipient of his liver. My dad is going to save someone else's life….. (we just got a call from the place that he went to, they were able to recover his liver, and two other things for transplants!!! THREE THINGS. MY dad is helping three different people!!!!)

Before we did the Hero Walk, Bear got to hang up a flag in honor of our dad. which was flown at half mast at the hospital. He's keeping the flag. Yesterday I had the honor of recording his heartbeat, and it's on my phone. I haven't listened to it since recording it.... I'm scared too, but I know that I wanna save up to get a Seattle Seahawks bear from Build a bear and put his heartbeat in that. I know it's going to kill me everytime I play it, but I think it'll also help???? the jury is still out.. lol

THe hero's walk was so surreal.... seeing that in real life.... I...I don't know how to process it... the doctors, nurses, and staff lined the hallways from the ICU to the ambulance bay.... it was so quiet, and I was sobbing the entire time walking behind my dad. He really is a hero... and my respect for him grew. I already had so so much respect for him. But wow.... The hero's walk was up til today, something I only saw on med dramas.... it felt so heavy, every single one of those people in those hallways had such a heavy look of respect and admiration for my dad. I feel like I'm shock kinda.... just a lot going on my head I cant keep things straight tbh...

Everyone has been a mess, but I think my stepmom and I take the cake on being a mess. (She doesn't have Tumblr, and none of my other family do so i'm not worried about them seeing this heh...) I have been dissociating a lot... I think... been blasting Sleep Token a lot to deal with this.... I never thought that my dad would be gone so soon... It's weird sitting in his chair writing this, knowing that he would usually never let anyone else sit in it... I have moments of hearing his voice when it's completely silent.... it's a sound that I will never forget, and his deep belly laugh when you would get him rolling.... his smile... Gods... I don't know how to feel.... it's weird to be here without him.... I wouldn't be sober if it wasn't for my dad, yeah I made the choice to get sober, but he helped me. He let me scream, cry, vent.... I didn't go to rehab, I literally detoxed on a greyhound bus on my way to Ohio. but when I got to Ohio. My dad was a Video call away, and I called him a lot. He didn't care about my ramblings, or the fact that I can never stay on topic.... he did the same thing.

We are cremating him, and having a wake for him with a viewing... which is going to be really hard for me honestly. After seeing him in the ICU.... but I think it'll be nice. and by cremating him. I'll be able to always have a little piece of him with me always. I just need to find something for his ashes, something that means something to both of us. Just us. I don't know where to even start... I'm not gonna be able to do anything until next month anyway...... I honestly feel so lost right now.... I keep thinking who am I gonna call. and my first thought is my dad....

I can't call him, and it hurts so much. But I know he isn't in pain anymore. He's with his dad, and grandpa. He's with my grandma, and aunts who loved him. But.... I feel lost... my heart hurts so much... I know that I'll learn to cope, and with a lot of time. It will get easier, but it doesn't feel like it. It really doesn't...

there is a GoFundMe going... i can get it from my stepmom if anyone wants it.. it was set up by a family friend.. just dm me I guess. i'll answer DMS but that's really it.

Me and my dad in 2019 in Idaho

This picture of my dad, I'm not sure when it was taken, but he looks so cool.

My dad when he was about 17 or so and his Mopar, this is my absolutely favorite picture of him. Picture courtesy of my Uncle Floyd on Facebook hehe.

Then these are pictures of his flag, the first three I took from the parking lot of the hospital. the last one my brother Bear took. I'm gonna post more photos of my dad. My Uncle Floyd, his brother is sending me a lot, and my stepmom and I are going through his facebook page and shes telling me stories about some of them. While going through some of his stuff... I know its soon.... but honestly... I'm keeping a lot of it. IDK where I'm putting it. But so far its mainly clothes, and stuff me and TJ one of my partners can wear. Might give my other partner a shirt if they'd like....

My dad is a hero, and is going to be saving someone's life tonight with the gift of his liver. I am so proud to be his daughter, but at the same time I am so hurt that he's gone. A small piece of him is going to live on with somebody else, whoever that is. I know they will be grateful for this, and that makes me happy. so happy, my dad loved helping people. So he is very much a super hero in my eyes.

Fly high daddy. I love you so much. You are saving one more life tonight, and I am so proud of you. So very proud to be your daughter, thank you for being my dad and one of my best friends. Even if you said that we weren't. I feel in my heart of hearts we were, I will never stop thinking about you. Or what you would do, or say. what jokes you would make, or how you say them. I love you so so much. I know you will be watching over us from now on, and that you wouldn't want me crying. But dammit dad... you know how I am... I can't help it... It's going to take a while before I can think of talk about you with crying. and you know it. you were always my hero for many reasons....

Do you know how hard it is going to be for me? Not being able to call you? Not being able to excitedly chitter to you about small things like my crystals or tarot cards? or...or calling you crying because I don't feel good or I have cramps and you make me feel better by making me laugh?? I know you know... I get the concept. heh.. But...I guess something is coming from it. I'm getting to know my Uncle Floyd better... He misses you a lot dad, Floyd loves you so much. He's sending me all of these really neat pictures of you guys... and he was making me laugh. Explaining the difference between having a mullet, and having long hair with bangs... lol

Floyd has been checking in on me and everyone almost daily, I haven't talked to him this much ever... which, yeah I know I can't take all the blame. He even said so.... You know you two are so much alike its kinda scary. heh. He called me princess the other day while I was on greyhound. I don't think he was thinking about it to be honest. He's been calling me kiddo a lot, kinda like you did. I think its cute. hehehe. But I think sadly this was the push I needed to connect with him more... He also has a really nice voice, just like yours. And the push I needed to connect with Kim more too.

I know that because of my mom, my relationship with Kim has been kinda weird. But I'm realizing that... some information was revealed and more clarified to me about certain happenings with my mom and wellll.... let's just say there are A LOT of emotions right now with that... I don't even know where to begin on that.... woooboyyyy dad... there's a lot to unpack there... and I know we've kinda touched on this crap here and there and really talked about things from your point of view. But Kim told me stuffs that.... Well I'm gonna need to talk to my therapist about it first because I really don't know how to process it. Because it was during the time I was treating you so horribly.... and I'm sorry... I didn't fully know or understand what was going on. I know I know I don't have to apologize for anything I know. But knowing this new information..... I'm sorry..... I'm so sorry. Ok i'm gonna try not to say that anymore. TRY.

I'm taking a lot of your clothes to be honest, oh and Ace is like my best friend now. Look! HE HUGE DAD HOLY FUCK

As soon as I started talking to Floyd Ace came out and started loving on me. I love him so much dad, he's so soft and sweet oh my gosh. But he misses you. He's definitely your cat lol for sure your cat. Everytime attacks Kim I giggle I can't help it. it's so funny, Tucker and Flash miss you too. Tucker has been so happy to see me. I love those dogs so much. I'm so happy to see them, and cuddle with them!!!! it's been so nice to be writing this and being able to set this aside to love on one of them for a minute. It's also been nice to spend time with Bear, We hung out a little yesterday.

He needed to run to Walmart, I tagged along cause well I wanted to go for a car ride. and I wanted to spend time with him too. He did drive all the way down here for me.... and yeah I know. I'm just glad he's here, he's getting some kind of closure with all of this... I know I've always been kinda like the fixer.. always trying to fix things... like relationships. like with my mom and Kim.

I now understand what was really going on... and I...I can't fix that. I can't, I have my own shit I need to worry about dad... like how i'm gonna live without you.... how am I going to do that?? I know I have TJ and Fruits... Kim, Bear, Floyd... Yes I've been constantly talking to TJ. I've been keeping him updated every step of the way....

But not you.... goddammit dad..... I know I'm going to be ok eventually, but this fucking sucks right now... My mind is racing, one minute I'm laughing about something you joked about or said, the next i'm shaking and sobbing because you aren't here... I feel like i'm constantly panicking.... I would totally lose my mind if I wasn't here with Kim and them... honestly I think if I wasn't here with them, I think I would be hurting myself right now or wanting to be really badly.... and that's a scary thought to be honest. I don't know if I do right now... but so much has been going on that I haven't really thought bout it frankly. I'm keeping a lot of your shirts for myself and TJ. I'm gonna see if J wants any of them. If not, well I'm not worried about it. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I promise to take good care of your shirts that your dad gave you. I have a lot of good memories of you two together, so to have some of these shirts that I vividly remember grandpa Taylor wearing when I was little, then seeing you wearing them... now me... its.... very special to me. And I'm very honored?? I'm not sure if that's the right term, but i'm gonna go with it...Of course I'm taking your Kiss Blankie, and one of your Seahawks shirts. my favorite one. the one you always wore, you know the one. hehe. I even have the shirt J and I made for you when we were teeny tiny. My handprint is so small oh my gosh dadddd... I promise to take good care of it.

Gods....there's so much more I wanna say. But I'm not really sure how too... I definitely feel like i'm still in shock...I thought I still had time... Dad... You HAVE to tell people when you don't feel good, I know you don't like people worrying about you but... THIS IS WHYY!! GOD dad.... I'm happy your not in pain anymore I'm so happy for that, cause god knows that you hated it so much... But this was too fucking sudden for everyone. Too fucking sudden old man.... Christ... leaving me...us like this... fucking hell dad.... I just... I need you. here with me. I'm always going to need you. I don't know what I'm going to do without you.... you were a really good man whether you believe it yourself or not.

You ARE a good man, you saved three different lives.... but mine is going to be changed forever and you know how much I hate change like this..... Honestly personally I don't think I'll ever really get over this, or this trauma... I really don't think I will. I hate this so much I do. plain and simple. I want you here with me dammit, it's not fucking fair! It's so not fucking fair!! I hate feeling like i'm being selfish when I know this is normal....I feel like I have to be strong for everyone else I don't wanna be. I spent most of my life hating you because of my mom!!! I HATE MYSELF FOR THAT AND ITS NOT MY FAULT. I missed out because of her, and because she lied to me about a lot of things..... and that's time I will never get back with you.... that kills me so badly..... like oh my gods it hurts bad.... so much..... I know there is still a lot of high running emotions. But you know how strongly I felt and loved.... gods... How am I going to this without you? I know I will..... but right now...I don't know how... I really don't know how..... I love you so much this hurts so badly.... I don't think I can properly pet into words how bad i'm hurting.... how badly i'm missing you right now. I know for a fact that if you were here right now, we would be talking about everything under the sun. Gods I need that right now..... I really do daddy... I just wanna talk to you, and laugh and hug you.

I would give almost anything for just one more day.... just to hear your voice, see your green eyes. hear your laugh.... feel your arms around me... I am so glad that we were able to work on our relationship. So fucking grateful. you mean so much to me daddy, you really do. I hope you know how much you mean to me.... I really really hope you do . I love you dad. I will talk soon.... maybe... might start a sideblog with letters for you... I'll have to think about that for a little bit. But I love you daddy. I will talk you later. toodles....

[st4rshiptr00per]

vent post whatever the fuck

i cannot stop fuckinggggg thinking about the shit my brother + sil said to me yesterday. like yeah they were upset whatever but its one thing to be kind of a dick to somebody because youre stressed and its another to imply......all of that shit. like my brother apologized to me afterwards. but oh my god it was so revealing like apparently you think im just not tryinf to help myself or take care of my loved ones. like i already knew that they dont really get what it is like to live my life with my brain in this period of time, this job market, at this age but that shit floored me. "if youre not enjoying like living there you should try to move out!!" I LITERALLY CANT. I CANNOT. I WONT BE ABLE TO EVEN START MOVING TOWARDS DOING THAT UNTIL NEXT YEAR, IF ANYTHING EVER ACTUALLY IMPROVES FOR ME AT ALL. I WAS BARELY MAKING IT BEFORE I WAS SUDDENLY DISABLED. im living in my personal nightmare, in a house with two other people each experience their own unique long-term traumatic events, but im apparently not trying hard enough to take care of them, when i am barely capable of keeping myself fed from day to day.

like. when i "took a break from school" (dropped out) because i straight up could not pass my classes no matter what i did they were like "oh dont worry youre a hard worker youll come back and finish it" like no bitch!!! maybe one day when i am heavily medicated ☺️ but you need to be ok with the idea that there is shit i am just straight up not capable of sometimes. like oh my god i have spent my whole life being horribly inept at shit everyone else seems to just get naturally. and then you imply that im struggling cuz i just havent gone and solved all my own problems yet. and im supposed to not get fucking furious with you.

and i dont even know how to approach them about this because the other thing that has been fucking me up is that they just leave me out of almost every family conversation. like they try. Sometimes. but no i dont get any family photos from them, i only get to hear my news secondhand, they talk to me for like maybe 10 minutes total when they are literally in my house. really having it reaffirmed for me that i am the least favorite family member lol

[eddiediazswife]

Oh for fucks sake. I saw the posts about the priest a few minutes after I sent you the ask about what was happening. And god do I have some thoughts.

Do I think the whole eddiexpreist thing is more of wild spec than anything?yes I do. But did I also think that of all the bt spec going around pre s7??I did. So now I'm dreading s8.

It's like you said if they wanted eddie to get with just anyone then they could've done the whole eddie and tommy thingy but even then I believe it would have been more of a kiss him and tommy's gone situation compared to the clusterfuxk that it is now with him staying till the end of s7. And with eddie especially I feel like once he knows something he'll probably realize everything that's connected to it as well. So if he's realizing he's queer it is gonna take him to buck. Unlike buck who goes oh so that's what I didn't know and not look any deeper. Maybe that's just me but yeah.

And also I really would like atleast one queer realization arc that doesn't revolve around getting with just anyone. Mainly because I'm such a demi eddie diaz truther. And as much as i want the demi rep because can you imagine seeing such a demi coded characyer for years on your screen and then its actually canonized, i dont trust tim or anyone else on the top for this show one bit. Especially after tim said that he doesn't plan out the season and writes as he goes. They will do the most for the drama and I don't trust them not to drag out buddie just to keep it going or something. .

Now eddie dealing with his complicated relationship with religion?that I can do.

I think I'll most probably keep up with the show through tumblr because like i said i dont trust them. I dont have any expectation. I have zero expectation for them to do anything actually good but that's also because I'm a pessimist at heart who's been burned too much.

(Sorry for the long ask. I didn't realize I had written so much)

Honestly feels like that’s how I’ve felt for the last few seasons Buck will cheat with Lucy? No way wousl never happen (it did), Buck gets with Taylor after what she did to Bobby? No way (that did too), Buck will kiss Tommy one of the original racist/misogynistic members of the 118? No way will Tim go there (he did again), Tim will find a way to bring Shannon back from the dead? Absolutely not this isn’t general hospital! (He so did it) so I have no faith that Tim won’t go there with Eddie and the priest but I will despise it more than all the other story lines that I have hated.

I agree with you that when Eddie has his realisation it will lead him straight to Buck because I think it will be Buck that encourages him to look at that side of himself. I think Tommy is just a plot point and Buck is going to learn some big lessons there which will help Eddie and being them even closer together.

I think Eddie absolutely needs to del with his religious trauma as part of his character growth but not by banging a priest.

I’m the same right now I’ll keep up with stuff here before I commit to watching because no way am I interested in season 7 again.

P.s, don’t worry about the long ask lol I really don’t mind people venting here

[just-somedude]

Ill be sending an ask not anon cause ur posts r worrying me...plz if u feel like talking to someone, u can talk to me.

Plz dont stay alone in this down moments.

Oh nah I'm not suicidal at all if thats what you're thinking, I'm just venting about my issues lol. I'd never leave my family like that, if I'm dying at a young age it's because I ran into a burning building to save a child or some shit, no fucking way am I giving in to my depression and letting it win like that

I've got a pretty good grasp on my it most of the time, I just have lapses in my ability to control it sometimes (this is one of those times)

I do appreciate the concern tho, thank you :)

[ttaibhse]

.

oh ALSO it feels extra bad because i know that to people who got used to me being very thin (like my mum for example who herself is very thin and wouldnt find thinness concerning till a person was like clearly emaciated) or met me during the first ~3 years of uni when i was at the skinniest it must just seem like i let myself go or something lol. in fact i know this is true of my mum because she said it to me dfkgjhdfg like i tried to explain the whole situation to her and directly said "so i dont want you to think ive just let myself go" and she was like well i did a bit. which was kind of crazy to hear and like she knew i had at least historically had ED difficulties BUT then again she did say to my sister that she didn't believe it was real. LMAO whenever i think about that it's like oh yeah my mum's own food issues are so compounded i really can't take anything she says at face value at all. but it still makes me sad to think that my mum is worrying about mine and my sisters weights meanwhile she herself has definitely got some kind of orthorexia going on and i think she will be in denial of that forever because no approach i take to talking to her about it has ever worked. and orthorexia is such a hard one to confront because of how convinced the person is that their behaviours are healthy etc etc and she IS mostly healthy she just doesnt eat enough. and her relationships with food and exercise are kind of um strained. and now she has osteoporosis and she was like "being underfed as a child probably contributed" which yeah it probably did but continuing to be underfed as an adult probably is contributing too. whatever this was supposed to be a vent about MY problems. anyway

[always-me-meha]

Manipulation. Trust. Document Proof. Bipolar mind problems.

This guy tho I love him to hell but the manipulation shit scares the shit out of me.

He has all the power to flip the script and I'd have to believe and trust him yenno?

But cause my mental illness I'm very..... convincable that this memory didn't happen or it did, or it went nothing at all like that. Or I'm just seeing shit, overthinking ect ect. Circle of trust is hard guys.

I'm not fucking mentally inefficient yet! Like yes my memory is messy..... and agh when in psychosis for a fact I do believe shit with confidence i am right, when indeed im wrong 🤦‍♀️

Besides that point, I'm not in psychosis. I'm a memory hoarder by this tumblr posts, messages, journaling, snapchat memories, videos and pictures in general and even items around my room. It's like I see it........ I can visually remember that whole moment if not day like, I'm back in time reliving it for the moment. So fucking weird. Could be something I forgot to never think of again and it's like oh!? You.....

Anyway anyway. Fucking caige man, pro liar. I think he's a good gaslighter as well ME ASSUMING FROM OBSERVATION and previous tactics he's used on me lol

I've never been stupid, just didn't fall for it till grrr the sexual attraction hit lolol now I'm fucked. As again this man I knew to be wary of sometimes (can't remember why... ah I think taking advantage for free weed all time back in the day, guilting me ect ect ect)

Like shit. It's scarey. Cause like the fact he still insists I came to him first when I know damn straight didn't go that way. Another example was yesterday he said I wouldn't shut up if I got my phone back that I'd start reading outloud lol. N sure shit I was reading he said, fucking lies! I made sure I was quiet as possible typing on tumblr. Not to bug him. I didn't speak till the sun came up and I let the dog out. But he'd be like you cooked ? You need to check your memory?

That's what fucking bothers me. Idk maybe his memory off to n that's fine we both brokey haha

Just I really hate someone trying to convince me something that I know the damn truth of how it went down. When I know I know (which is complicated when mania or psychosis gets involved.... even tho now I'm self aware enough it tricky to concince me. You can do minor tricks on me like moving an item in a different spot lol but yeah)

Like once again I document almost everything. So I can easily look through my journal or phone and pretty much bam evidence PROOF I'm right. Usually never challenge me on something I'm confident I know lol

Random vent to is when fuck he tells me not to worry about my mum over something if she never said anything, that'd piss me off, I know my MOM BEST. DONT TELL ME NOT TO WORRY OR PANIC lol

My point is I wanna have a faith and trust in what you're telling me is correct and I can be oh okay..... I believe you. But what doesn't sit with me is when in my gut I know this fact is not true.

God dammit caige. I'm only having an issue cause that was just yesterday you were doing it to me. What happens when it gets to the point I DONT REMEMBER he can fully control that..... I want a man that respects that part me sigh.

There was one time I argued with my friend if he got a new truck cause something was different lol I argued like hell, your bullshitting me, this isn't the same truck. Like I felt mind fucked. Sure shit it WAS his same truck.

So see people can be right...... but that's how easily my brain flips from I KNOW FOR A FACT OR MY FRIED BRAIN IS SAYING IT KNOWS .

I just scared my man will idk..... make me his puppet. Wtf bruh. I had this convo with about being his puppet. And I found an old of saying I was mums puppet. Ah shit balls, I think I'm dating a version of my mom.

[impiwimp]

oh boy its connors 1 am advice time! i need advice

i have an irl friend group that i really enjoy, but theres one guy in it that im developing a major annoyance of. at first it was all chill, but then he kinda dumped like all of his trauma to me when we hung out and now im uncomfortable hanging out with him alone again because Serious Time Is Awkward As Hell (he was just venting to me unprompted and i was like 😶)

which um is obv weird but not a huge deal in the grand scheme of things? but now im noticing shit about him that gets me ticked off like how the fact he likes to shit on stuff the friend group talks about out of nowhere or how he gets suuuper hung up on small shit like missing a discord message. its at the point where im worried a friend of mine (who is a first time dm) is being dragged to go along with what this guy thinks a dm should do even though he didnt want to be involved with the campaign in the first place?

now i would tell him my gripes (after adequate talking to the group to make sure im not just misinterpreting shit) but there is an issue. this man takes every fucking criticism to heart. his self esteem is in the fucking ground. i told him he was “kinda a dick sometimes lol” and he got SO UPSET it was irl and he turned around to look at me like “what?! 😨😰” and acted like a kicked dog about it. it is in my personal opinion that you should NEVER react that strongly to criticism especially if you want people to think youre improving.

so NOW im at an impass because i dont even know if telling him my issues would improve anything. but i also dont want to have this turn into a whole friend group fight because everyone else in this group is really cool grahhh.